#and highkey way to emotional
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mikalilys · 9 days ago
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I do this thing when it’s Christmas/new year where I write a postcard to my future self and open it the next Christmas/new year.
I opened my one for this year last night, cried, then fell asleep.
But fucking hell omg so much changes in a year and seeing past me ask if schools still shit, knowing now that I’ve left and started homeschooling just ugh. I hardly noticed it but things really did get better when I left, I did get happier, but it happened so slowly that I didn’t notice it. Like sure I still feel like shit a lot of the time, and maybe I’m still sick, and maybe that’s gotten worse.
but I’m not walking around like a zombie anymore, I’m not crying every morning, before going to school 2/3 days a week, I’m not staying up longer wishing I didn’t have to fall asleep because if I did I’d have to wake up in the morning.
I’ve never been one for reflecting on my past self and wishing I could help her, but god how things have changed and I just wish I could tell her it’s going to be okay.
I wish I could tell her that I don’t just have dreams of living, I truly want to.
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lord-squiggletits · 4 months ago
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What is the Tarnma penpals au? I've seen you mention it a couple times and am super curious about it!
Hiiii
So the Pen Pals AU is an idea that I got a couple of weeks ago. Kind of self-explanatory by the name, but the idea is it's a post-war scenario with a diplomatic ending b/t the Autobots and Decepticons. One of the many efforts to normalize relations is a pen pals program that's set up to pair Autobots with Decepticons under randomized pseudonyms. The goal is to try and create positive relationships based only on these letters and not any preconceived notions based on faction or identity. (Also it's pre-Earth which means it's pre-Delphi for Pharma, so his normal non-traumatized personality features.)
Pharma and Tarn naturally get paired up under this program, and the first part of the AU/fic (yes I'm going to write it eventually) is them basically having their pen pals relationship turn from friendship to heavily implied mutual romantic attachment. Their individual daily lives are also shown bc each of them is dealing with their own identity-related crisis: Tarn struggling with depression and addiction in the aftermath of all the things he did for the DJD and confusion over why Megatron just had them change so suddenly. Pharma with the realization that his whole life has just been defined by his accomplishments and he's lived his life in a way where he's oft-respected and admired, but never loved for who he is as a person rather than what he does.
The whole AU was originally meant to be fluffy and slice-of-life-esque (there was even an arranged marriage component in the very first conception of the idea), but as I fleshed out the setting more, I realized I wanted to actually delve deep into the implications of a post-war setting. So the Pen Pals AU has taken a darker turn recently; not darker as in fluffy romance to dead dove, but it's more like, the fluffy romance develops and then the past/war comes back to haunt Tarn and Pharma's relationship in a way that's very (re)traumatizing, both for them individually and their chances of being able to stay together as a couple.
So the fact that Tarn was in the DJD/oversaw Grindcore and did countless atrocities is very much an element of the story that's explored rather than shied away from. At first he deals with it on his own, and for a while he lives in blissful ignorance knowing that his pen pal is the one relationship he has with a "normal person" (he knows that his pen pal is a doctor, aka not a hardened soldier and criminal). Unfortunately things get complicated when his pen pal asks to meet IRL because he wants them to be more than friends, and Tarn realizes that he can't move forward with this new, blooming relationship without being honest about who he is. On Pharma's end, he has to grapple with the idea of choosing love over reputation, following his heart rather than his fear of social rejection/ostracization. Especially when the consequences of continuing to date Tarn could go from just "people judging him" to.... well, that's what me eventually writing the fic is meant to reveal. :)
TLDR: Tarn and Pharma meet as anonymous pen pals, end up having a lot of shared issues re: loneliness and isolated public personas, help each other solve their personal problems, share a mutual love of music, and fall in love, then realize who the other is. Complications ensue.
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bumblingbabooshka · 1 year ago
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marxistgnome · 8 months ago
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Ive been watching alot of enterprise recently and one of the things that strikes me, especially in the latter seasons is how focused it is on captain archers heroism. It seems like every other episode is concluded by him risking his life in a feat of daring do to save the day. It kinda has the effect of making him seem a bit more like an all american action hero rather than a starfleet captain who is a part of a cohesive crew. This is a little jarring, especially when compared with other star trek captains (who have their action hero life risking moments but they are 1 much more scarce and 2 have alot more justification beforehand) but I do think it works quite well character-wise. Archers relentless self sacrifice and die hard (the movie) approach to alot of situations really draws attention to the fact he is the first person to be the captain of the starships we know and love from other shows - and especially the fact that the role and code of behaviour of later captains has not by any means been established. It shows how he acts more on emotion than protocol because there are no protocols yet for how a captain should behave and it shows how he reacts to encountering dangerous and chaotic circumstances there are no precedence for - by putting his life on the line rather than risk anyone else, even to the point of irrationality. And this makes sense! In the tos/tng era we have things like the kobayashi maru and command simulations where you have to send a crew member into a life threatening situation, but enterprise didnt even expect to see heavy combat, they barely left space dock with weapons, there is no way archer was prepared to this extent and his actions show this. So yes, the heroism is very focus is very interesting character wise however narrative wise its fucking annoying. Making Archer the go to guy who has to jump on every grenade and has to take every bullet gets old pretty quick. For one thing it really takes the drama out of it because we know Archer will get out unscathed cos he did in every other virtual suicide attempt so far. And for another thing the self sacrifice stops feeling earned because its just a go to - and you can definitely maintain a balance between showcasing how archer is reckless with his own life and keep the emotional weight by not having it be such a frequent thing. But my main gripe is that this focus on archer saving the day absorbs so many other cool opportunities. like in immunity syndrome kirk had to choose to send spock or mccoy on a suicide mission - and also had to concede that he couldn't do it himself cos he also has similar self sacrificing herosim streak - and that could be something so cool to see on enterprise but the archer focus gets in teh way. ( i am now realising i am only midway thru season 4 so if this does happen at some point keep it to urself). And it gets in the way of so many chances to explore other characters. Travis Mayweather is criminally underutilised i want to see how he behaves in a life or death situation!!!! I already know how archer would cos ive seen it a bunch of times!!! And there are so many instances where it would have been more interesting if another character was in the grenade jumping position - like what if phlox had to test the cure for the klingon virus on hoshi instead that would have been so interesting to see cos of how close they are. I maintain that if like a 3rd or even a 5th of big captain archer hero moments had been devoted to exploring other characters or other options enterprise would be so much better. Truly society if
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alxclaremont · 5 months ago
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life update no one asked for: worked 300 hours in a month, started my junior year of college, started therapy, realized i hate my major, and i am subsequently changing my major
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arolesbianism · 5 months ago
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I need to make a new pmd story right now or I'll explode
#rat rambles#someone I follow made some pmd ocs based on one of their pokerogue runs and Im just sitting here like why didnt I do that first fuck#I have three guys Ive been using in literally every run (because theyre my only tier 3 shinies lol) and I wanna make them ocs sooo bad#I might end up doing it but I mostly am just unsure because Id have to make some tough decisions when it comes to their designs#mainly if I stick closer to the actual colors used for the shinies or make my own pallets for them#on the one hand I Do like the colors used for them but on the other hand I wouldn't actually want this story to be too pokerogue inspired#so like Id feel bad using the pokerogue shinies for a story that ultimately has little to nothing to do with it#second biggest issue is that one of them is a golurk and god I dont wanna draw that#also one of them is a pyukumuku and thats fine by me but it does necessitate some creativity#the other two are an eevee and leavanny#although Id definitely have the eevee evolve into flareon since my best runs with him were when he was one#now tbf those also happened to be the runs I got multilense on him (one of them I got two on him) and he was able to stunlock anything#slower than him to death with bites and steal all their items with covet#Im so glad they switched eevee's passive to pick up it makes my life so much easier#simple wasnt Terrible but it was hard to use well since most of its evolutions arent strong or defensive enough to utilize it well#tbf I didnt try very hard since leavanny is my default sweeper and he learns sword dance#but eevee does make for good support early on at least even if it takes good rng for it to hold up well late game#tbf leavanny should also be in that camp but its simply built different (gets sharpness as a passive)#golurk is the real one that falls off hard tho unfortunately#which sucks because it's terrible early game and good for like five seconds mid game and then mostly terrible late game#I say mostly because god does my boy hard carry me through the final boss every time#generally a decently built leavanny with stone axe can cleave through 90% of the game but bestie gets hard countered by the final boss#I will say tho that Ive enjoyed using pyukymuku Way more than I thought I would its lowkey highkey saved my ass more time than I can count#its soooo important in pokerogue to have a stalling pokemon because youre inevitably going to need one#oh yeah I forgot to mention that eevee isnt one of the tier three shinies but my boy is the lesser of two evils amongs my tier two shinies#the other is goldeen. which I have also used in a huge chunk of my runs. it was the second shiny I got.#that guy tormented me so bad I was sitting here having to convince myself that the seaking carry was real#every now and then I get to use a better water type and I feel a surge of emotion as I remember what it feels like to use a good water type#and then I sigh and go back to seaking since I need my luck score maxxed out and I dont have space for my other tier two shines because#theyre both 5 costs
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blargh-chicka-honk-honk · 1 year ago
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i've been quiet for a while here, and by quiet i mean near nonexistent, and by a while i mean for months. this is because i got a new job. it's full time. full time jobs drain me like nothing else, because that whole 8-8-8 system thats supposed to keep you happy and healthy doesn't work when you spend so much time just generally being mentally ill, so instead of 8 hours work and 8 hours sleep and 8 hours play, i get 10 hours work 2 hours commute 2 hours self-maintenance 4 hours being mentally unwell 1 hour fun and 5 hours sleep. speaking of being mentally unwell. dont read the tags.
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mikkeneko · 4 months ago
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...this fic bunny has developed, if not exactly a plot, at least an emotional arc
:|
having now read all of the coffin rescue AUs, the hurt/comfort gremlin in me is blissfully sated, but finding myself a little saddened at the lack of Xianle Trio in them, particularly Feng Xin (this is why I probably won't get much into TGCF fandom, really -- I ship the wrong things.)
so in order to take this trope and, as usual, make it as stupid as possible, I am imagining what if Feng Xin were the one to coincidentally stumble over Xie Lian in the coffin? Because he'd certainly help him out! -- he cares too much to do otherwise! -- but he would be so incredibly unequipped to deal with the fallout of All Of That.
i am now picturing Feng Xin having broken the coffin and absconded with Xie Lian, possibly back to his palace, puts him on a couch and is now just staring at the absolute catatonic mess that is post-coffin Xie Lian while bluescreening and panicking because he doesn't even know where to begin. does Xie Lian need a bath? food? medical treatment? all of the above but where does he even start??
so, I'm thinking possibly in his panic he calls Mu Qing, because he simply doesn't know who else to turn to, and does a very bad job of explaining what he needs. and mu qing is just, ughhhh, why am I getting dragged back into this bullshit, but he goes over to Feng Xin's place complaining all the while, I am not a servant any more Feng Xin, you cannot ask me for favors just because you can't comprehend basic manual labor, it is 100% not my job any more to clean up after Xie Lian and this complaining monologue lasts right up until he lays eyes on Xie Lian and goes HOLY FUCKING SHIT
i am not going to write this
#fenglian unboxing au#emotional arc mostly centering around 'how to help your suicidal friend'#'who is highkey suicidal but fortunately(?) physically unable to die'#despite kinda shipping it I think it would be platonic/qpr fenglian#feng xin loves xie lian. xie lian is his most important person. he doesn't want to have sex with him#after however many years it's been#feng xin deserves a chance to decide for himself whether he wants xie lian in his life#and whether he wants to care for xie lian (spoiler: he does!)#instead of having xie lian decide that for him#to be fair to xie lian. I don't think he really had a choice in the matter#sending feng xin away was probably the only way to protect him from bai wuxiang#that said! here's a second chance for them both#hua cheng is not onscreen in this fic but he's in the background being a love martyr#I'm thinking HC got wind of xie lian's reappearance from his spies/sources in Heaven#had a moment of blackout THAT ASSHOLE DID WHAT TO DIANXIA. HE'S A DEAD MOTHERFUCKER rage#figured out thankfully quickly that feng xin was not the guilty party here#traced FX's steps back to the now unearthed coffin#put some pieces together#had a brief existential meltdown when he realized what happened to xie lian and that he had been able to do nothing to prevent it#nearly ceased existing for a moment there#when he recovered grudgingly acknowledged that he doesn't like feng xin at ALL but#feng xin is doing right by xie lian in this case. and that gets him SOME points back in hua cheng's book#and decides to put his resources into making sure that nobody ELSE finds out about xie lian or what happened#covering up for feng xin who sure isn't capable of keeping a lid on something like this himself#and waste away nobly for his unrequited love in the background forEVer
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hitoshiyoshi · 7 months ago
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~ 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐇𝐀𝐕𝐄 𝐀 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐓 𝐀𝐃𝐌𝐈𝐑𝐄𝐑 / 𝐂𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐇
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synopsis ↬ the mha boys reactions when learning you have a secret admirer
pairing ↬ gender neutral!reader x mha
characters ↬ izuku, bakugou, shouto, kirishima, shinsou, sero
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+ MIDORIYA IZUKU will become a nervous little broccoli. He'll probably realize that you have a secret admirer way before you even notice; his detective skills are strong. He's not afraid to confront this person if they're making you uncomfortable because if it is a problem for you, it is also a problem for him as well. Terrified that you would actually leave him for this person and can't help but feel insecure. He'll compare all of his attributes with them and will probably easily feel inferior. Of course, you reassure him that you would never leave him and give him a huge confidence boost please reassure him. If you don't, imagine him being extremely anxious and shaky every time he sees that person around. Will politely tell that person to leave you alone if they are bothering you too much since he doesn't want to be rude.
+ TODOROKI SHOUTO pretends to be unbothered but is actually really bothered and insecure as well. He won't tell you too much about how he feels about it, he's mostly concerned whether you are uncomfortable with it. Like Izuku, he would find the identity of this person pretty quickly. Neglects his own personal thoughts on this person which probably causes him to spiral into a battle with his self-image and confidence. Although he's very pissed off about this, he silently tells this person that you're taken by being close to you all the time. Does a few death glares in their direction if he notices that person staring at you. He probably isn't too big on PDA and you quickly take notice of his changes. Unhappy and very sulky every time he sees this person around you. He'll eventually spill his feelings to you and apologize like he always does for keeping his emotions inside.
+ BAKUGOU KATSUKI would be the most bothered out of all of them. He probably isn't too obvious that you two are dating, people naturally put two and two together. When he finds out that you have a secret admirer, he's highkey offended. Wasn't it obvious that you two were dating? Well, no... Now, he goes out of his way to make sure everyone knows that you're in a relationship. Sticking to your hip, his arm around your shoulder, holding hands, eyeing up anyone that steps too close, and other things until people know. It would get annoying to others after some time, but he doesn't care. Somehow manages to track down your admirer and curses them out until they leave you alone. Destroys all the gifts and useless stuff that they've given you.
+ KIRISHIMA EIJIROU also acts unbothered but seriously hates it deep down. Instead of acting nonchalant, he would convince himself that it isn't a big deal and you won't leave him. Unfortunately, doing this is harder than he imagined. He also has an unwavering feeling that you would leave him for this person because he wasn't good enough or couldn't take care of you. Competes with this person for your affection and will do the most chivalrous manly acts to prove his love for you. Gets so uncomfortable when he sees the gifts or other presents this person gives. He probably won't go out of his way to confront them, but if he catches them leaving notes or gifts for you he'll just announce himself as your boyfriend and proceed to ask them to leave you alone.
+ SHINSOU HITOSHI observes and watches your interactions with this person very carefully. He's so wary that this person has other motives with you, more concerned about your wellbeing than anything else. He doesn't seem like the type that would be jealous but rather looks at things rationally. Randomly stumbles across them leaving love notes and gifts for you and gets so uncomfortable just from watching. He is not afraid to brainwash this person if they bother you too much; doesn't care if that sounds bad. If brainwashing doesn't work, he would just intimidate them into stopping. And if that doesn't work, he would bluntly tell them to leave you alone in the harshest way possible.
+ HANTA SERO is the king of being unbothered and actually IS unbothered. It's not that he doesn't care, but he trusts you enough to know that you won't leave him for someone else. He has no reason to be worried about this person unless he's given one. Communicates his feelings very well, doesn't hide anything. In fact, he's pretty blunt about how he feels about it even if it sounds harsh. He also doesn't actively try and figure out who you're admirer is because he could care less about that person. Only values your opinion and offers to help once he realizes it's going too far. Proudly displays himself as your partner until this person finally understands that you're taken and stops.
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shouts-into-the-void · 3 months ago
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Just read screenshots of the Aaron extra chapter and I have so many thoughts, so here they are:
It's always so funny to me to be reminded of the fact that the animosity between Aaron and Neil is mostly one-sided. Like, Neil finds Aaron frustrating, but all the antagonistic stuff he does to him is ultimately in service of helping him in some way and while he's angry when Aaron provokes him, he otherwise regards him with disinterest and even expresses the desire to see what he's like when he's relaxed and enjoying himself during the party with the Vixens. Meanwhile Aaron just really hates that man.
I really appreciated Nora using this chapter to clear up some of the gripes a lot of the fandom has had with Aaron's character in the past and confirm that Aaron's comments to Nicky have to do with his cousin making graphic and unwanted sexual advances on their teammates, and his accusations towards Neil were from a place of concern for his brother. I also liked that it was pointed out that of course he would have at least some internalized homophobia due to being raised by religious zealots in a conservative area, but is unlearning it due to Nicky.
On a similar note, I'm glad that we were provided the context that Nicky's inappropriate behavior is a defense mechanism to weed out people who might hurt him rather than legitimate advances, because I think the fandom tends to forget that he is also a character with extreme trauma written outside of the "perfect victim" stereotype. His actions aren't okay, but the entire point is that they are the result of what he's had to endure just like every other member of the team
The implication that Andrew specifically signed with the Foxes so Aaron could go to college
Aaron and Andrew have the same nervous habit of picking at loose thread
It causes me physical pain to see Andrew clearly trying to open up to Aaron about his self-harm, but because his way of communicating is less straightforward (he doesn't lie, but he because he stuggles to confront and be open with his emotions, he presents the truth in flowery, vague language) and because the two dont really know or understand each other, Aaron can't fully grasp the implications of what he's saying
On the subject of things that cause me physical pain: baby Aaron telling his mom that he wanted to be a neurosurgeon like the people on TV and her laughing and saying he'd never make anything of himself. Fuck Tilda Minyard, all my homies hate Tilda.
Andrew is so uncomfortable, someone Get Him Out of There.
Going off that and his nervous habits (that Aaron mentions he did often enough to be noticable as a habit premedication), I am highkey wondering if the reason Sober Andrew doesn't talk to anyone outside Neil is because he's just. Socially Awkward.
We get a little bit of insight into Andrew's "misogyny" (I personally think distrusting certain people as a result of extreme personal trauma is a little bit different than just being sexist, in the same way women distrusting men because they're used to being harassed and belittled isn't misandry, but that's up to your personal opinion) and that his distain for Katelyn comes from the fact that he thinks she's stringing Aaron along and will turn out to be awful like his previous girlfriends (there's also a notable implication that Aaron has the same self-destructive tendencies as Andrew, and may be why he went out of his way to get him into college and on the straight-and-narrow) also see that this extends to Bee as well despite their close relationship, with him being so afraid that she'd reject him for being gay that he can't even look at her while talking about Neil, probably made worse by the fact that she's a maternal figure for him, which is where this trauma response originates.
Aaron is the only person on the team who's aware that Andrew hasn't slept with Neil, and the only one to grasp the significance of the fact that they've gotten close to that point already despite Andrew's trauma, outside of Renee
It was overall really interesting to see inside Aaron's head (I actually wouldn't mind a book from his perspective, he has a similar way of thinking to Neil but much more grounded) and to see Andrew through the lense of someone who just views him as Just A Guy
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josephandrewstarkey · 4 months ago
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hiii! could you do drew starky x reader with an age gappp. and maybe reader is also famous for like singing or something so their highkey the IT couple.
tysm for your request anon, i hope you like it! xx
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in the backseat
warnings: 18+ minors DNI, fingering, backseat, kind of public
words: 845
❧ drew starkey x singer!reader
Y/N was only 21, but she was already one of the biggest names in music. Everyone knew her songs—she was the kind of artist who could make you feel something with just a few lyrics. She wrote every one of them herself, and that’s why people loved her. Her music was raw, real, and so full of emotion that it left fans obsessed.
Drew, on the other hand, was 30, an established actor known for his role on Outer Banks. When they first started dating, people couldn’t stop talking about the age gap. Some fans loved them together, saying they were the perfect couple, while others weren’t so sure. But they didn’t care.
They first met after one of her concerts. Y/N had seen on Drew’s Instagram story that he was going to her show, which completely blew her mind. He was a huge celebrity himself, and yet, here he was, a fan of her music. So, she invited him backstage. When he showed up, they ended up talking for hours—about music, acting, life, everything. The connection was instant. That night, he offered to take her home, and she said yes. From that moment, they were inseparable.
A few months later, they were the couple everyone was talking about. They were on magazine covers, all over social media, and no matter the controversy, it was clear that they were in love. Drew adored her, and Y/N couldn’t imagine being with anyone else.
Tonight was huge. Y/N was performing at one of the biggest stadiums in the U.S., and, of course, Drew was there to support her. The crowd was insane, but when Y/N spotted Drew in the audience, it felt like everything stopped. He was smiling up at her, and for a second, it was just the two of them.
The concert was a blast. Y/N was at her best, hitting every note, dancing across the stage, and the crowd loved every second of it. She could feel the energy, the love from her fans, and especially from Drew, who never took his eyes off her.
In the dimly lit backseat of their SUV, the world outside felt distant. Y/N leaned back into Drew’s chest, the quiet hum of the car’s engine adding to the tension in the air. They’d been on the road for a while, their driver focused on the winding streets, giving them a sense of privacy. Drew’s arm wrapped around her waist, his lips brushing against her neck in soft, teasing kisses.
“You’re driving me crazy, you know that?” he murmured against her skin, his voice low and gravelly, sending a shiver down her spine. Y/N’s breath hitched as his hand drifted lower, fingers grazing the soft fabric of her dress, teasing her inner thigh.
She let out a quiet gasp as his fingers slid beneath the hem of her dress, moving dangerously close to her center. “Drew,” she whispered, her voice barely audible, thick with anticipation.
He chuckled softly, pressing a kiss to her ear. “You can be quiet, can’t you, baby?” His fingers finally made contact with her, slipping under her panties, and she bit her lip to stifle the moan that threatened to escape. The feeling of his fingers against her slick heat sent a wave of pleasure crashing over her, her body responding instantly to his touch.
He moved slowly at first, drawing out her anticipation, enjoying the way her body trembled against him. “So wet for me already,” Drew whispered, his lips tracing the curve of her jaw. His fingers moved deeper, finding that sweet spot inside her, and Y/N had to bite down on her hand to keep from crying out.
Her free hand gripped his thigh tightly, nails digging into the fabric of his jeans as her body arched towards his touch. Drew’s pace quickened, the pressure of his fingers intensifying as he worked her closer and closer to the edge. He knew exactly what she needed, exactly how to touch her to drive her wild.
Her breath came in short, shallow gasps, her body trembling with the effort to stay quiet. “Drew, I’m close…” she managed to whisper, her voice barely holding steady.
His lips curled into a smirk against her skin. “Then come for me, baby. I’ve got you.” His thumb brushed over her sensitive clit in perfect rhythm, and that was all it took.
Y/N’s body tensed as waves of pleasure crashed through her, her mind going blank as she rode out the high. Drew held her close, his fingers never faltering as he helped her ride through the intensity of her orgasm.
When she finally came down, breathless and flushed, Drew pulled his hand away, wrapping his arm around her waist once again, holding her close. He kissed her temple softly, whispering in her ear.
“You did so good, baby.”
She leaned into him, her body still trembling, and let out a soft, satisfied sigh. The world outside seemed far away, and in that moment, it was just the two of them, lost in their own little bubble of pleasure.
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mikodaiyo · 2 years ago
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I said things about @mythicamagic @cakeit0n @drosselmeyerwrites @chierafied @elevenharbor @sayuri-liu @cdart-carmendaniele @sagemcmae @tmetta and youkaiyume that I hid in the tags because I'm SHY I GUESS I'M CRAZY SHY??
Let's spread some love: tag your favorite people/bloggers and let them know how appreciated they are 💗
oh i hate these because i’m always afraid i’ll forget someone (but the sentiment is nice!)
@waywardbaby @supernatural-jackles @deanwanddamons @negans-lucille-tblr @lovealways-j @evanbukley @evansrogerskitten @nihilism-sophia @samdeanbitchjerk @kittenofdoomage @luci-in-trenchcoats @im-lovestruck
i feel like i’m forgetting people and i’m sorry if i actually did! love y’all ♥️
#I'm terrible at replying to things I get such stage fright from being perceived 😩 I'm working on it though 🤧#when i get @s it takes me such a long time to know how to respond but i do keep these in my drafts#I feel like i have to say that otherwise I'm coming off so ungrateful! but i really do appreciate being part of things like this#fandoms are fun the people are really sweet and I highkey have a crush on all of you 💀#UNLESS YOU KNOW UNLESS YOU'RE NOT IN MY AGE BRACKET then I still care for you and hope this blog#gives you all a good experience#I'm writing in the rags instead of an @ bc everyone I know has been @d already#the rags bro the TAGS#wait ima just do it here#mythicamagic's work no matter the fandom has become one of my favorites and I hope we become close internet buds 🙏🏾#mythica's voice like their writing voice I like the way they convey emotion and think myth is really skilled#cakeit0n has always had a charming energy to them and honestly I want to be as nice as them like that's a role model!#their personality is chef's kiss cakeit0n is like a fun day at the beach#elevenharbor is like if I went to school and made a friend on the first day that's so embarrassing to say but its true ahhhh fuck ahhhAHHHH#eleven is like the friend I would hype up against their will like is it lunch? Recess? Silent study I dont care LOOK AT ELEVEN#and then people like sayuri. cdart. sagemcmae and cherifield. tmetta. drosselmeyer and youkaiyume#I have such respect for like they did it. they've mastered it. whether its their amazing organization or their dedication to craft or just#how they peacefully exist and enjoy things I am just in awe and I just dont want to talk to them because I am so immature compared to them#and its embarrassing 😭😂 like maybe one day but not today I just want them to know I like them on a different level#chierafied I'm sorry I spelled it all wrong holyyyy see this is why I don't do thissss#oh also of course mama-ino and imjaneees and Stardust damn there's so many of you I want to get to know better#and I didn't tag youkaiyume bc their into other stuff rn and I dont want to bother them and I'm chicken lol i do not wish to be perceived
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clawsdevour · 4 months ago
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hq charas confessing hcs !!
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wc: 0.6k content warning: not proofread, all fluff headcanons!!
⊹͏*.◯
-the type to have false confidence in themselves to help cope with their anxiousness. they'd for sure be hyping themself up loudly in the corner of the locker room with their headphones blasting in their ears. when they do confess though, they are a complete mess. they'd confess somewhere discrete where no one else is able to see them in case they get rejected right there despite knowing that you've been liking them.
"hey... look. i kind of like you. you don't have to like me back if you don't, i totally understand if you want to stay as friends even though it could be awkward-"
charas: kageyama tobio, tsukishima kei, kenma kozume, sakusa kiyoomi
-the type to come completely prepared for rejection. they just can't keep all these feelings bunched up anymore to the point where it's obvious that they have this big fat crush on you, and their heart is bursting with every beat. they're willing to accept the fact that you may not like them back and they're completely fine with it. when they confess, they just let it all out.
"SO basically you probably don't know.. or well know already but I really LIKE LIKE you! you've been running around in my mind like crazy these past few weeks and I just can't keep these feelings to myself anymore.. it's completely okay with me if you want to stay as friends though!"
charas: bokuto koutaro, hinata shoyo, nishinoya yu, tanaka ryunosuke
-the type to be calm, cool, collected despite having all these wandering feelings rapidly evolve and take over their mind. they're prepared for the worst and the best, mainly the worst. they're stern and real with their feelings, staring into your eyes to try and read your body language waiting for a simple yes or no.
"I like you.. that's kind of all I have to say. i'm sorry for sending a letter telling you to come all the way back here just for me to confess. but i've been having these feelings building up for so long, it's just time I come clean."
charas: akaashi keiji, iwaizumi hajime, ushijima wakatoshi
-the type to be abolsutely fiddling their fingers before they even meet with you. they may be one of the most hard working players with immense respect to their name but at the end of the day they're human too. the growing emotions that sway their opinions on you grow much larger by the day, theres none where their mind is just blank.
"I need to confess. I can't keep up with my emotions any longer. to be short and blunt, I really like you. you're just.. I don't know how to say it but.. someone I really value and see as more than just a friend.."
charas: daichi sawamura, sugawara koshi, kita shinsuke, osamu miya
-the type to be highkey prepared to accept whatever your response will be. they've come to terms to let life roll at its own pace, if you said yes the spark will lit into a torch that guides the hole in their heart. they're sincere with their words in a one on one, a bit more serious than usual when confessing to show that they aren't joking or playing around because they have actual interest in you.
"this is gonna be kind of embarrassing on my part but listen, I have these serious feelings for you that won't stop changing. I like you, okay? you don't have to respond to me immediately.. i'll even wait for your response because you truly do matter to me."
charas: kuroo tetsuro, oikawa tooru, yaku morisuke, atsumu miya, suna rintaro
masterlist here
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beachf4gz · 3 months ago
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i knda get why ppl treat fanart as 'lowbrow' bc pushing out into purely original work is how you will usually create ur best and most valueable art, but honestly if u r seeking to improve in visual design i have found that having *something* you can use as a vessel to consistently draw over and over allows u to explore the technical elements of design without the complications of concept and thinking abt how concept and execution tie together from the ground up. i think if u find something that generates a passionate need to create work around it, i.e causes emotion and idea and drive in u, u r incredibly lucky and should capitalise upon it. i am rlly happy with the ways i improved as a visual artist over the last 6 months, and i dont think i would have had the personal drive or space to do it without having something that inspired me to interface with it so hard. when i first played de it was exactly the right point in my life to resonate incredibly heavily with me and so it inspired me to interact w it in the medium i usually do (drawing) violently, and that also happened to be a period where i could have easily fallen off very hard from drawing. i have never rlly been drawn to tumblr b4 that, but having a website dedicated to this knda relationship to media has been super useful and awesome i rlly love it tbh. like yeah actually if this media evoked my strongest emotions and thoughts why not return them to the source in how i express them. absolutrly sick im very glad i have a place to spam the lowest brow shittest fanart without being embarrassed abt it. fucking love disco elysium happy to have the kind of autism that allows me to do that. having fun highkey.
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first harry/kim
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evolved recent harry/kim
i am happy abt this it makes me happy :b idk how else to describe it other than it gave me the space and subject to explore sum visual mediums better and have fun and shit. awesome.
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meowzfordayz · 7 months ago
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how they speak up for you — mitsuri, shinobu, kyojuro, sanemi, muichiro
Author’s Note: short and sweet, and hopefully a lil funny too. 😆
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how they speak up for you — mitsuri, shinobu, kyojuro, sanemi, muichiro
Kanroji Mitsuri x Reader, Kocho Shinobu x Reader, Rengoku Kyojuro x Reader, Shinazugawa Sanemi x Reader, Tokito Muichiro x Reader
Word Count: ~800
CW: explicit language, mild sexual content
Emergency Request Fulfilled: could you write comfort for when Their S/o like absolutely hates speaking up for themselves, like someone could be walking all over them and they'd be like "Oh, its fine" bc conflict= worst enemy? I would like to request Muichiro (love him sm) and Sanemi if that's okay, and the rest you can decide (-if you want to add more.)
~faqs~
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Mitsuri will be all over the situation (in a good way, ofc 😌)
“Baby, didn’t you want your drink hot?” —> she’s already staring daggers at the barista who made your drink 😒
“Hm?”
You do your best to conceal the pinch of your eyebrows, as well as the goosebumps raising on your arms 🥶
“I thought cold drinks made you cold, and you don’t like being cold?”
… “Hm?”
She’s not buying your nonchalance 🙃
“That’s it.” Uh oh. “I’m getting you your drink made right.”
😳🫣🫠
“Nonono, Mitsuri, it’s fiiine.” 😭
Arms crossed, her lips purse, eyes narrowed as you weakly grin and take a big sip 😄
“If you won’t let me get you another one, then at least wear my sweater?”
🤯 “Okay!” 🤭
So maybe she’s wearing a cropped tank top underneath — you’re only a mere mortal after all 
— #oops my thirst made an appearance 😅
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Short girlfriend = scary girlfriend
And that’s a compliment 😎
Shinobu doesn’t need height, bulk, or a dick to defend you
Her scathing tongue and unnerving stare are plenty
Not to mention, she’ll go full Karen if need be, but the more eloquent, calculating, deceptively sweet version 😌
She can make anyone feel like a complete idiot in 2-3 sentences, give or take 
Which does include you, but you don’t argue too often 😅
Basically:
It’s highkey hot when she speaks up for you 🤭
But it may or may not make you cry when her sharpness is directed toward you 🥲
Fortunately, you in distress is also one of few things that immediately softens her — at least, when she’s the reason for it 🥺
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Kyojuro always tries to solve your problems for you
Not bc he thinks you’re incapable, and not w/o your expressed consent/prior communication
But he just hates seeing you unhappy, uncomfortable, unsafe — really anything that isn’t grinning and laughing
He understands there’s a time and place for more difficult and painful emotions, but why on earth wouldn’t he go out of his way to ensure those times and places are as few and far between as possible????? 🤨
So, obvi, he more than willingly goes out of his way ☺️
“Do you want me to say something?” his quiet breath warms your ear, softening the frustration growing in your chest
“I dunno,” you sigh, gesturing hopelessly at the person who’d just cut you in line, “We’re all going to the same place anyway.”
“True,” he shrugs, “But that was quite rude and noticeable of them.”
“Do you want to say something?” you tease, elbowing his side with amused fondness
“Not if it discomforts you.”
“It wouldn’t discomfort me,” you mumble, cheeks darkening nonetheless, “You’re so cute.”
Albeit, you aren’t sure whether to feel proud or embarrassed when he somehow intimidates the person who cut you into leaving altogether 😅
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On one hand, you know Sanemi has your back ☺️
On the other hand, you aren’t 100% positive that that’s a good thing 😬
“I swear, does that bitch even know I exist?!” 😤
… 🫣
“I bet she doesn’t! Otherwise she wouldn’t dare treat you like-” 😤
“And this is why she doesn’t know you exist.” 🥲
“Pardon?” 😐
“Sanemi, I love you, and I so appreciate how ready to go to war you are for me, but-”
“Ooh darling, you have no idea. Go to war? I will be the war for you.” 😤
“So sweet,” your eyes roll, “How about you just let me handle it?”
“And how are you handling it?” he scoffs, “With smiley face emojis?” 🙄
“You deserve kindness and honesty. Not her manipulative bitch shit.”
“I’ll block her.”
“You what?!” 😳
“Would that suffice?” 😅
“Actually… yeah.” Sanemi is very surprised. Gushing now, “I’m so fucking proud of you.” 🥰
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It’s kind of alarming when Muichiro speaks up for you
Bc you get a faint taste of what he was like before he’d really opened up to love 😕
And that Tokito Muichiro is sharp and cold as steel w/ a -139% tolerance for bullshit
Impossible to impress 😬
But your Muichiro hugs you when you’re feeling low, rests his chin on your shoulder while you do your best to draft a stern, confident text msg to your asshole “friend”, and is more than happy to tell you what he would do were he in your shoes
… you usually ignore his advice 😅
Buuut sometimes he reaches over and hits SEND before you can stop him 🫠
“MUI! I was going to delete some of that!” 😭
“Nah, it’s great as is.” 😎
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seruadoric · 8 months ago
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okay but ramming you headfirst w my brainrot but like jiyan(wuwa) probably a brat tamer right? tbh i cant really get into brat taming bc if my mans start being all mean to me i would /gen get upset esp in like the bed UNLESS its like done out of love. So like i can only imagine he ""brat"" tames his lover when they've done something he does not like and like i dont think jiyan is the type to get easily upset UNLESS you've like---say put yourself in harms way bc of him to like shield him from an attack or something then he'd fuck you meanly (after you've recovered obviously) anyways hello welcome to wuwa rot let us all go to hell amen
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I HAVE SUCH A SOFT SPOT FOR JIYAN so many relationships/smut hcs for him 😔 afab!reader, slight voyeurism
personally, i don't see jiyan being too mean with you. rough as he is on the battlefield, he's much more tender and gentle with his companions.
but at times, he finds himself frustrated at your attempts to protect him ... he knows that you're coming from a good place, and that you really care for him — but he can fight for himself just fine.
so when he sees you injured for trying to shield him, his emotions just blow up ... ( nsfw under the cut )
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"consider this your punishment." he growled into your ear, thick and girthy cock ramming into your cunt once more. pressing you up harder against the wall, he was not holding back. "i already told you i could handle myself out there, and you want to play hero?"
"look at yourself." whimpering and moaning against the wall, with jiyan's hand covering your mouth. you were a mess underneath him. "stay silent, or do you want someone else to hear you?" "j-jiya—" you managed to say, only for him to press himself harder inside you. "i told you to stay quiet."
another moan slips from your lips, and jiyan takes his hand off, instead exploring down your body. he felt your walls tightening around him, taking him in so good —
he groans, pushing himself deeper inside. "i'm close," he whispers in your ear, his cock throbbing against your womb. "do you want me to do it inside?"
with your nod, he plants his seed inside of your core, eliciting a loud moan from your lips. he gently pulls out, grabbing a cloth and cleaning the both of you up. "i hope you've learned your lesson, sweetheart." his demeanor was different than what you had just seen, as he placed a kiss on the corner of your lips. "... don't do that again."
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this is highkey shitty 😭 i don't have much experience writing smut, so please forgive me if this wasn't as good ૮ ◞ ﻌ ◟ ა this is actually my first time writing smut scenes, so eckkck 😿
i might also write this but for amab!reader ... but i need someone to tell me so, since i'm not so good at writing for amab 😓
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