#she was so sad

[mikalilys]

I do this thing when it’s Christmas/new year where I write a postcard to my future self and open it the next Christmas/new year.

I opened my one for this year last night, cried, then fell asleep.

But fucking hell omg so much changes in a year and seeing past me ask if schools still shit, knowing now that I’ve left and started homeschooling just ugh. I hardly noticed it but things really did get better when I left, I did get happier, but it happened so slowly that I didn’t notice it. Like sure I still feel like shit a lot of the time, and maybe I’m still sick, and maybe that’s gotten worse.

but I’m not walking around like a zombie anymore, I’m not crying every morning, before going to school 2/3 days a week, I’m not staying up longer wishing I didn’t have to fall asleep because if I did I’d have to wake up in the morning.

I’ve never been one for reflecting on my past self and wishing I could help her, but god how things have changed and I just wish I could tell her it’s going to be okay.

I wish I could tell her that I don’t just have dreams of living, I truly want to.

[cherrygrenade]

‘i chose her because i couldn’t imagine we’d ever be friends’ did you see that poor girl’s face take that back RIGHT now

[skinreflectsthesun]

.

[teardropsonsmyguitar]

.

[inkskinned]

the tradwife movement is the same as it has always been - back in the kitchen, back to breeding - it just has better branding.

when i was younger, i hated pink. i was not like other girls. this is now something i'm embarrassed of - this was not me being a "girl's girl."

but it was expressing something many of us felt at the time: i literally wasn't what girlhood was supposed to be. this is a hard thing to explain, but you know when you're not performing girlhood correctly. it isn't as easy as "i liked x when girls liked y" - because there were other girls that liked x, too - but i never figured out exactly the correct way to like x, or to be interested in y.

now there is the divine feminine. this is the same rhetoric it has always been: women are biologically driven to like pink and ribbons and submitting to our husbands.

the problem is that the patriarchy found a better PR team. because yes, actually, i want every woman to have the choice to be a homemaker. i also want her taken seriously for her legitimate home-making labor. i want her to be recognized as also having a job, just unpaid. i want men to have this opportunity, too.

but it is no longer "i made this choice and I love it." instead it is a sixteen-paragraph rant about how selfish it is that my generation isn't having kids. instead it's long videos about how if you feed your children processed foods, you're going to kill them. instead it is "this is what womanhood is supposed to be. i feel bad for any other choices you're making."

the shame spiral is just prettier. it is large houses devoid of personality. it is the implication: if you don't have this, you aren't happy. the solid, everlasting assurance: women are actually supposed to be submitting. this is the default. this is the natural state of things. all other attempts inflict suffering.

but you can no longer say i'm not like other girls. you can no longer reject this image completely. you cannot find it revolting, even if you know that the underbelly is toxic and festering. sure, it is the same repackaged patriarchy. but the internet does not have shades of grey. you should support and reward other women! your disgust is actually internalized misogyny. not because you are seeing a vision of yourself the way they're trying to train you to be. not because you feel her ghost pass within an inch of your earlobe. not because your father will eventually ask you - why can't you be like her?

because they figured out how to make it beautiful: women will sell other women on this idea, and we will find the singular loophole in feminism. sure, she's shaming you in most of her videos. sure, she implies that a different life is obscene. but she just wants you to be happy! you'd be happier if you were listening!

and the whole time you're sitting there thinking: i'd actually just be happier if i had that kind of money.

[lena-luthor]

No one in history has had special treatment like you.

[chloesimaginationthings]

The day FNAF Charlie Emily was shut out..

[artkaninchenbau]

Crocodile finds a strange stray cat an 11-year old Nico Robin (AU where they met 13 years earlier. Robin's been on the run from the World Government for 3 years. Crocodile's 27 and has not set up base in Alabasta yet)

It seems like I have become possessed. By some sort of demon.

Bonus:

[monkesupreme]

ref

a satisfactory answer for Selina

[nizaen]

silly wall-e art from twitter c:

[lungthief]

sometimes u just gotta remind yourself that while ace attorney is about law and justice and stuff it is also about a bunch of young adults living in [CALIFORNIA]

[quixoticprince]

Remember how Miss Pauling said she'd spent her whole life to help the administrator....

She didn't even know what she was helping with, but she wanted to be by her side, until she learned how deeply personal and self destructive the whole thing was... and in the end there never was going to be a 'place' set for her :^(

I'm so sorry Flo 😭

[spiritual-turg]

more of anya being her happy and whimsical self bc twitter seemed to really like this one!!

[yogurtgut]

HI THERE!! HERE'S THE ROBOTNIK SIBLINGS!!! I AM NOT OKAY, SEND HELP :'''DDDDD

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

why did he do that to me? part 2 of this :3

[inkskinned]

okay is she being actually immature or is it just a woman over 30 expressing a human experience you find to be immature.

like yeah. at certain ages... let shit go. im not defending the real immature shit. im not defending the karen you're picturing. i worked in retail i hate those people too. (once somebody got mad at me because she didn't like how our winter window decor was a snowman smoking a pipe. i wish i was joking).

but men at 57 will write books about how 17 year old girls are soooo sexy. they will invent worlds where women have to be naked for "armor reasons." they will write songs that treat women as objects. people rush to defend them. meanwhile a woman at 35 will be like "heartbreak is hard, actually" or "i feel betrayed by a friend" or "i am struggling with something emotionally." immediately people will say stuff like this woman is 35 by the way. by the way this woman is SO OLD to be experiencing this. BY THE WAY.

im 31, almost 32. the other day a poet was blasted online because at her "big age", she had written a poem about feeling unloved. top comment was "this woman is 29 by the way." this woman is too old to still be useful, by the way. she has to behave better . maybe if she was a good wife and mother she could stop existing loudly, and the story could continue on without her. this woman has served her purpose, by the way. she's so cringe, by the way. at 29 - so old! - she still hasn't figured out that her existence should be one of shame.