#and he cannot comprehend that i genuinely like it. i can't understand how he can hate it so much

[bamsara]

Howdy! I just want to take a moment (or two…or three..yeah this is longer than I thought it would be) to talk about your characterization of Narinder in your TRoD fanfic, specifically his grievance over what he perceived the lamb to be and betrayel.

I like to think Narinder repeatedly calling Lambert a traitor (I think at least once a chapter actually lmaoo) over and over, is trying not so subtly to avoid thinking about the why behind the betrayel and the pain that comes with it. Especially since he'd already spent an eternity wondering about the previous betrayal of his siblings. How emotionally torturous it must feel to be in this cycle of rejection, from the people he depended on, even now from his own followers who don't recognize him. And then, when he and Lambert finally appear to be on the same page about something, Lambert goes and spares Leshy, reminding Narinder once again that his divine commands hold as much weight on the Lamb as they will decide to hold.

It isn't up to Narinder to decide how the lamb will act, as much as he wants to. It's one thing for Narinder to have people listening to him, but it's another to actually be heard, and after an eternity of silence during his imprisonment he's absolutely desperate for some form of control and impact. For someone to truly hear him. Which is a shame, because Lambert does, but Narinder cannot recognize it since they don't always give Narinder what he wants (since being a God is all about what you want), and instead are more interested in giving him what he needs.

I assume at this point, after being revived into a mortal form, he's actively given up on trying to understand why everyone just keeps "betraying/rejecting him" and would rather use his own inferences of their behavior as explanation, once again, for that feeling of control, since he's utterly mortified of hearing those words come from their mouths instead of his own (doesn't help that he can actually read minds either). He'd rather kill his siblings than hear the why (not saying the siblings were justified ofc, but understanding one's motivations is, y'know, important to effectively communicating with them in a way that's healthy) Despite needing to be heard, he's internalized that many won't bother listening unless he has control over them in some way, like he did before when he was powerful. When he mutilated his siblings, had Lambert create a cult in his name, being heard isn't just an emotional or mental aspect to his wellbeing, but is literally part of his power as well.

He was/is a God, he's used to followers prostrating themselves just to hear the time of day, giving their all to listen, hear, and follow him. It's why he struggles to separate the aspects that are ingrained in a follower, from those who are a friend. Unless they're also God he can't comprehend much of a difference, and expects them to be of the same or similar standing. He was friends with Lambert when he was Godly, yes, but he still saw himself as above Lambert, and expected them to lay down their life to him like a follower would. Yes, Narinder didn't want to cut them out of his own life in their death, but still expected them to just..die for him. He didn't ***just*** see Lambert as a friend, he saw them as a friend that was also his follower. An exceptional follower he loved, but not an exception. There was a power imbalance that Lambert now sees.

It's why Narinder's utterly baffled and offended, fearful even, at Lambert, someone he deemed as "traitorous", investing their time into still trying to talk to him..listen to him.. for virtually no gain…at his lowest point...when he himself is now "lesser".

Narinder tries so hard to not become invested in those he deems as "lesser" or "traitors" but its near fucking impossible, because like it or not, his desires and needs are so inherently mortal and genuine (desire for power, companionship, love, understanding, control, etc) that if he doesn't close himself off, he may have to face falling into the same pit of disappointment and failed expectations he fell in with Lambert/his siblings once again. So he doesn't, and hides away in his shack until Lambert comes knocking.

And now, as the cherry on top of this emotionally constipated bundle of angsty cat woes, he has to live and breathe as the very thing he deemed as "lesser". Being forced to invest in these mortal needs, now that they're a necessary component to his survival. This is also why I believe he goes on these little crusades with Lambert in the first place as well. Not only because they return to him a sense of routine and normalcy (also pining, coughocoughghhrbogh who said that?), but also because it allows Narinder to forget about investing in his own wellbeing for a while.

He was a God, he didn't have to go through the work it took to just do your laundry, eat, brush your teeth, or take care of yourself since he never had to. The thrill of adventure and battle, the adrenaline rush of near-death experiences, can't hold a candle to the mundanity of work. So when he's not crusading, he just..sleeps..wanders around..the fact he's not socially accepted by his own followers doesn't encourage him either. I mean fuck, he such a complete wreck after Lambert spared Leshy, he crusaded and neglected his health for so long he passed out.

His life is all work now, investing in himself, in others, being forced to have his ego get knocked down a few pegs, and care again despite how much it hurts. None of these things are "given", Lambert's love is not just given (as in, blindly follow) and that's what I believe will be an eventual "eureka" moment for him.

Living is work, but it's worth working for

He ain't hot shit anymore, but that's ok.

Anyway, sorry for the long-winded ramble this was all actually just a very roundabout and ineffective ploy for me to talk about how I relate the song "Don't Speak" by No Doubt, to your Narinder's character. Happy belated New Year, hope you're doing well. :]

LKSDHGKLSDHGD HELLO. This is such a well articulated analyzation of Narinder holy moly, I hope you don't mind me answering this with not much to add on because WOW I'm really vibing with your takes on him and I wanted the world to read this too slkdghlksdhgs. I have a lot of my own takes on Narinder and how he'll progress to be as the story comes along, and eventaully some of this will be talked about in TROD either with the lamb and/or with other characters, particularly Ratau, as he comes to an understanding that others are understanding.

I have not had coffee yet this morning but I could go on for a day and a half about Narinder being used to getting what he wants as a god and the entire process of how actaully lonley and isolating it can be to be continously pedastaled and worshipped verses being on equal, human level with other beings and how long it takes for him to realize that.

HAPPY BELATED NEW YEAR

[phantomrose96]

Astounding. Incredible. Deeply, deeply horrifying. Incredible and it will be haunting me for at least the next 72 hours minimum. 10/10 sending it to everyone I know.

Reading the first time I fully did not register how much of a literal chekov's gun the disintegrator was. Made me think way to deeply on what is required for Danny to regenerate. Does it require at least a certain amount of flesh 'intact'? Cells? Molecules? Is it that so long as there is a single atom of his being around he will slowly and horrifically rebuild himself? What would happen if he did switch back? Would he briefly feel the incomprehensible pain of every scattered atom of his being or would it go to fast for him to comprehend the pain? Is he even able to fall unconscious when his body is injured that badly or does his being keep him awake at all costs as a self preservation method?

Anyways this is deeply terrifying and will now live happily next to Nothing Remains and Under Moonlight and all the other fan fics you've written traumatizing this poor, poor dead teenager.

(I've also spent way to long thinking about what comes after the end. What do you do with your friends exposed lung and vocal cords and mouth while he slowly regenerates? It's not like they could just leave him on the golf course screaming. But where could they put him that no one would hear? The thermos? The ghost zone? Hope that Vlad has something that could help?)

10/10 fic I'm chewing drywall thank you for writing this amazing piece!

(Prometheus)

JKDSNKJDSJKNDSJKNSD THANK YOU!!!!

I fully did not register how much of a literal chekov's gun the disintegrator was.

YEAH!!! I wanted there to be something that acted as a through-line in the story. I wanted Maddie and Jack's appearance near the end to be sudden and surprising and scary but not "out of nowhere." Carrying the gun through the story served that purpose so well because like, it's gaudy enough to capture people's attention, but it's also easily dismissed as background shenanigans... until it's not.

And the Disintegrator gets to evolve with the tone shift. It's some goofy combobulation Jack uses to blast fish out of a lake at the start. And then he tinkers with it. And it becomes this thing he can shoulder and point at Danny and draw a genuine fear response from his son (even if Jack had no intention of firing. And Danny is in no real danger) And then it becomes the thing he draws on his son with every intention of firing...

The damn thing even gets to be ripped to pieces and put back together over the course of the story. Danny brushing away loose nuts and bolts of the half-deconstructed Fenton Disintegrator while his liver stitches itself back together. But that's probably nothing :)

What is required for Danny to regenerate. Does it require at least a certain amount of flesh 'intact'? Cells? Molecules? Is it that so long as there is a single atom of his being around

YEah and this is absolutely part of the horror element to me. Danny doesn't know. He doesn't know how much is enough and how far-gone is too far gone. From my word of god, it's his ghost core that the reconstruction happens around (which is not a physical thing). So it at least means every cell is not about to spawn a new Danny (sorry no Under Moonlight angst here). But Danny doesn't know. And how can you tolerate gambling your life over and over and over with a mechanism you cannot understand?

Is he even able to fall unconscious when his body is injured that badly or does his being keep him awake at all costs as a self preservation method?

Yes. There is a ghost-amount of consciousness he's clinging to, which if he loses his grip on would result in him dying. ...Unless it doesn't. :) Danny doesn't know. Danny can't know. Danny cannot risk finding out. Because if he risks it, and he's wrong, he'll die. What's really the difference between "this will kill me" and "I THINK this will kill me, and the only way I can ever know for sure is to do it"? The difference only matters if Danny's made the decision he'd rather die.

I've also spent way to long thinking about what comes after the end

Nothing good. Nothing good. And consider how absolutely traumatizing it is for Sam, Tucker, and Jazz. They find Danny like this and they can do absolutely nothing while organs of himself scream. And this has been ~7 hours since the run in with the Disintegrator. Danny has only barely regenerated, starting from absolutely Nothing. It could be another 24 hours. Another 48. Before he's done. And he's required to stay conscious the whole time. He was desperately sleep-deprived already and now he needs to remain awake through this all because if he passes out with organs missing, he's done for. (Or he might be done for, and he cannot know for certain unless he takes that monumental gamble).

So what do Sam Jazz and Tucker even do. What do you even do? You can't leave him. God no you can't leave him. But you can't move him. You can't talk to him. You can't help him. You can't leave him. Do you sit in the snow? Do you sit for 24 hours watching screaming flesh grow back together? How ungodly long must 24 hours of that be? Will it ever stop screaming?

[ambreiiigns]

so he says 7.5/9. he . really weird. i knew he probs wasn't gonna love it as much as i do and it really sounded like he was Hating it for the first half but then turns out he likes almost everything it's just that the very few things he dislikes are the big ones jfnsnfns ?? he doesn't love the Development of the characters and some plot points if i'm understanding it right. like he loves the artistic direction and the MUSIC is his fave and will add some songs to his playlist lmao and he likes homura and sayaka but then he feels a lot of other stuff wasn't handled in the best ways. i think he's insane bc it's perfect <3

me & brother have finished madoka (the series) wanna know his thoughts

[max1461]

I don't typically feel at home with "nerds" (in the sense of "programmer type guys"), because I feel there is something important about the world that very often they cannot see, and I am going to try to articulate what it is.

First, a digression.

My extended family is... well, most of them are not really evangelicals (insofar as they're Christian at all, they're not very good Christians and they mostly don't seem to care), but culturally they're part of the vulgar evangelical milieu; the sort of people to whom prosperity gospel megachurch pastors appeal. Years ago when I was about to start college, my uncle came to visit, and I told my him that I was going to study math. He's a smart guy, and started telling me about how he was always good at math in school, and telling me stories about the various times he'd used math (meaning, basically, elementary algebra) to great effect in his various business ventures. That's what he understands: business, making money... to put it less charitably (though I say this with considerable affection): scheming. So he tried to speak the language of making money to me about it. When he asked me what I wanted to do with my math degree (by implication: what sort of scheming was I looking to get involved in) I said something to the effect of "there are all kinds of job opportunities you have with a math degree, but that's not really why I'm studying it—I really just want to understand math at a deeper level". I remember the look on his face when I said that very clearly. It was utter bafflement. Not because he hated math or something, but because I genuinely don't think the concept of "wanting to understand something at a deeper level for its own sake" had ever occurred to him. The inherent appeal of understanding the world is, I think, not something which exists (or exists very strongly) in his emotional landscape. He is blind to that part of the human experience which drives scientists to be scientists.

Well, that's alright. He's a schemer and not a scientist by nature. Some people are that way. I like my uncle well enough, and I enjoyed talking to him on that visit. But he's not someone I would try to share my love of math or linguistics with; on both accounts I don't think there is anything I could say to make him get it.

Why do I bring all this up? Well, one way in which I relate to programmer type guys is that we both like math, and I think we like for basically the same reason. And I think most programmer type guys will have met someone like my uncle, someone who seems like they fundamentally cannot see the appeal in this thing which drives you so strongly, this thing which is so great a part of your emotional landscape. I'm sure a lot of you will know the exact feeling I had during the above interaction. You are so fascinated by these questions about how the world works, and how it can be rationally understood, and this other guy basically seems like he just... can't even comprehend what it's like to be motivated by that. It's so completely foreign to him, and his perspective is thus completely foreign to you.

We are all, sometimes, this uncle.

Part of why I am interested in linguistics is because I have this deep urge to explore the world (by this I mean principally: the human world). I have this desire to travel, to talk to people, to see and experience different places and different ways of doing things. I want to go to various places and see what they look like, and meet the people there and hear what they have to say, and so on and so forth. There is an "openness to experience" element to this, but that is very insufficient to characterize the thing I am trying to articulate; for instance, I have little interest in psychedelics or other prototypical "high openness to experience" type activities. To me, there is an ineffable vibe that every place seems to have (a "place" in this sense could be as large as a country or a small as a particular bar), and the vibes of nested places are like layers on top of one another that make being in the world feel like an extremely rich experience. Learning languages and learning about languages gives me this window into other places, which is extremely appealing, and furthermore I can access it to some degree from my own home, which is nice. Of course doing this from my bedroom is not enough, I want to actually go, to wander around, and in those times when I've gotten the chance to do so I have felt that it was very much everything I had imagined it to be.

When I try to talk to programmer type nerds about this aspect of myself, I often feel much the same as when I was trying to talk to my uncle about wanting to study math. They just don't seem to have any sort of reference for what I'm talking about, these emotions have never occurred to them in any significant way, and they can't figure out how to relate. I believe this is, in essence, the source of my frequent abrasions with rattumb, and why I have basically bounced off of coding for cultural reasons time and time again in my life, even though conceptually it's exactly the sort of thing that interests me. For reasons of nature or nurture, programmer guy personality traits rarely co-occur with wanderluster personality traits, they just don't seem to go together. And so in spaces like, well, this one, I'm just left feeling like nobody can quite relate to what I am getting at a good chunk of the time, and the consequence of this is that I feel emotionally impoverished. That's not anybody's fault for being a different sort of guy than me, and I'm sure there's stuff about which I'm the confused uncle (in fact, I know there is: the appeal of psychedelics, meditation, and other "transcendence" based activities is one of these things for me). Idk, just thought that was something worth expressing.

[ticklinglady]

The Guild's actions during the story are so insane, when you think about them properly, you know? When I first read the arc with them, this moment hasn't really occurred to me, as I was too busy going nuts over finally seeing the names of the familiar writers, but now when I think of that... I am not sure, I comprehend how they managed to achieve such a ferocious reputation. I have already made a little post about how extremely dysfunctional the DOA members are, but at least those guys have a plan, which actually makes sense more or less, even despite the gang using cheatcodes/the Book. The same cannot be said of the Guild however archghhjkn. Like, what the hell were these guys even doing??? XD

So here are just some moments, which weirded me out the most

At first I'd like to address the entire story with everyone's favorite tsundere, Lucy Maud Montgomery. Her introduction leaves quuuuite an impression in the best way and nothing makes me happier than the fact, that she gets a chance to find happiness in the following chapters and actually becomes a reoccurring character! HOWEVER, her entire involvement with the Guild is super odd... I still can't wrap my head around her getting fired. She is a girl with a hella powerful ability, who got taken to the Guild from a terrible, terrible orphanage in order to fight for them in the war for the Book, so not only is she very strong, but she's also immensely dependant on the organisation and wouldn't do anything outside of its interests. Yet Lucy is also put under extreme pressure. As she herself puts it, the Guild doesn't tolerate failures and will kick her out the moment she screws something up.

Later we see that this is exactly what happens, when she messes up her first mission. Fitzgerald himself confirms that, since she failed and revealed her ability to the enemies, she's no longer useful, so now a powerful esper, like Lucy works for free as a... laundress?

EXCUSE ME??? WHEN HAVE THE GUILD MEMBERS EVER DONE ANYTHING, BUT FAIL AND REVEAL THEIR ABILITIES?

Let's be real, these dudes were successful like only once or twice...

This fact not only makes Fitzgerald look like an idiot for wasting such a talented and useful worker, because of one mistake, but also as one hell of a hypocrite, cause he is more than fine with everyone else fucking up. And in case of Lovecraft and Steinbeck: fucking up twice. To add to the oddity, we later learn, that Louisa genuinely cares for Lucy and despite her social anxiety actually stood up for her during the entire story, but even that wasn't enough to change Fitzgerald's mind on the issue, though Louisa is one of the few people, whose opinion he respects. Honestly, this is such a waste of a truly useful subordinate. And speaking of which....

The Guild has never even tried to implement Edgar Allan Poe during the war...

This man is actually rather op when you think of it. He can capture and neutralise literally any ability user in Yokohama (besides Dazai, Mori and Ranpo ofc) just by throwing a book at them. Seriously, as we see with Chuuya, they don't even have to read it, they just need to see the pages. Plus the book can be actually sent via email!!! So why has there been an absolute zero amount of strategies with the use of this ability??? They could actually try to catch Atsushi by sending him such email containing any of Poe's mystery stories and then safely carry him back to their base. And it doesn't have to be just Atsushi, it could be literally any of their enemies. Non-combatant, like Ranpo could use this pretty damn well to his advantage and it doesn't take a genius to understand the potential of the "Black Cat in Rue Morgue". But nooooo, it seems like everyone has just forgotten of Poe!!! (Tho to be honest, I can actually see this situation in a funny extra awfgbfggfjj. Not the main story however) The agency would never even learn of his existence, if he didn't personally decide to try to fuck Ranpo's life up. Like, what does Poe even do in the Guild? He's the master architect and, according to him, the third ranking man in the organization, but we never see him be of any use, so Idk. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Lucy at least got to do something, unlike this poor man.

Then there's the entire drama with the Guild's decision to destroy Yokohama. Where do I even begin...

First of all, Fitzgerald has no way of knowing that Atsushi is going to come to Moby-Dick to fight him. Poor guy is the Guild's primary goal and has already gotten himself captured once, so it would have been safe to assume that the ADA decided to hide him somewhere and not send him on any dangerous missions for the time being. That basically means Fitzgerald could have burned down not just Yokohama, but also the only person, who could actually help him find his precious Book.

But if we're to ignore this, let's also go with Wikipedia then~

"Yokohama is the second-largest city in Japan by population and the most populous municipality of Japan. It is the capital city and the most populous city in Kanagawa Prefecture, with a 2020 population of 3.8 million. It lies on Tokyo Bay, south of Tokyo, in the Kantō region of the main island of Honshu. Yokohama is also the major economic, cultural, and commercial hub of the Greater Tokyo Area along the Keihin Industrial Zone."

..........................

Good luck making up for the destruction of THIS, Fitzgerald 🖕

And if this in itself wasn't bad enough, most people, including me, tend to forget that all Guild members are actually big shots in the American government, which I think is very sad. Because first of all, can you imagine any of the Guild members actually working as politicians?!! The sheer idea makes me hysterical avshbgj. Like, just consider Lovecraft working as a senator or something. This eldritch horror of a man leaves the ocean once in three years at best LMAO. Second of all, I have a feeling, that the destruction of Yokohama at the hands of influential politicians from a foreign country would have resulted in an international conflict or two~ Like as if random deranged rich Americans arriving in Japan, wreaking havoc over there and destroying the second largest city in the country wasn't bad enough, these Americans just HAD to be super influential businessmen and politicians. Louisa, my dear, I understand that it wasn't your intention, but it's as close to a declaration of war as it can get, you know? Fitzgerald may be ready to do anything to resurrect his dead daughter, but I'm not sure, that the execution of himself and the rest of the Guild at the hands of the Hunting Dogs is something he'd like.

(And here's another funny thing that stems from them being politicians 🤭 As @originalartblog wittily pointed out, Fitzgerald wasting all his money fighting sskk has probably resulted in a market crash and recession over in the USA)

I also have some other questions in regards to this entire plan, such as why did they have to waste Moby-Dick just to destroy Yokohama? Yes, it works in the short term, but in the long term they loose a super powerful fortress with the stealth mode and as the practice shows, you better have a safe base, unless you want another lemon freak to blow it all up. I mean, you could just ask Lovecraft to destroy everything for free. Or, if the device is the only way to stop the giant whale from crashing, why didn't Fitzgerald just take it to a far away bunker or something and waited things out there without the need to spend millions of dollars just to survive the explosion? (And it would have been extremely funny, if during the fight with sskk he just threw the device overboard) But I think I have already rambled for long enough already atxhghbgv XD

The Guild is an even bigger mess than the DOA and I think that's glorious 🙌

[purgatoryandme]

A lot of the Youtube essayist and Reddit critical reviews of Monkey Man are really striking in how much a certain brand of white dude just...doesn't understand the concept of "you are not the target audience". Wild to see people sincerely struggling to come to grips with something that is GOOD but not tailored to their lived experience who rarely have to do that.

A lot of these people are sincere in their bad takes here and genuinely believe they're giving helpful critique! And have had a lot of good takes before!

But then I have to lose my mind hearing people say they felt Monkey Man wasn't making strong political or socio-economic commentary (!?!?!?) because it didn't spoonfeed the audience an explanation of what being a minority is like. The fact that this movie wasn't voyeuristic genuinely mystifies them???????? Extra insane to see the repeated opinion that the side characters weren't fleshed out or didn't have a completed arc delivered because their definition of change is so wildly off-beat from the message this movie is carrying. They cannot comprehend having this kind of a deep relationship with somebody you just met. Don't get it at all! Can't relate to the experience of that instant connection that comes with struggle, how differently it makes victory taste, and how standing for yourself can mean standing for the people crushed under the same boot without getting a solo hero complex. That IS the culture and atmosphere of the movie that they keep saying is under explained aohdiushndiasnhdcasjnda

Aryan P's interview and video essay hit so different. The absolutely clarity with which he can articulate the experience of watching this movie, what each character embodies, how they fit into the greater narrative - absolutely refreshing and absolutely points out exactly how much a lot of the critic crowd needed to be slapped with a movie that wasn't made for them.

[yuseirra]

I really am trying to make sense of hikaru's character, and trying to bring everything I see of him and combine it together in a way that makes sense to form his character but it's actually impossible. I could manage to make sense of it somehow till 161, but I just cannot with what we learn out of him in 162, it has information that contradicts what's previously given to us and it's as if he has split personalities that cannot coexist...

The only way to make this understandable and could be thought of as consistent writing would be that he's ACTUALLY possessed, I'm serious, because what WAS that about him saying he does have fatherly feelings and the fact he funded for the movie, was willing to accept he'd be killed etc, I don't feel those were lies either, it DIDN'T have to be there. It's one of those information that no one would expect out of him so much and had been purposely given to us with intent. Those aren't usually lies because what's the point?; It's bad writing to just throw those info in to confuse the readers, it wasn't enacted in a way to be taken as a lie.

It wouldn't have been a problem if his appearance during the movie arc never existed, then he's perfectly coherent in regards to his previous portrayals, but I always felt that his portrayals in that arc would be fundamental to understand his character, his eyes didn't have the black stars in 154 in reaction to Ai's video either, so I was convinced the reactions he had towards Ai's video was so genuine.

I really want to ask the author if that's it for this one.

I really don't get it for this case, it's ACTUALLY impossible to integrate what's been shown of him as a single character, and it's not like the chapters have been spread out so far that it lead to a lack of consistency, it's been less than ten chapters since these events happened and he's drastically different that I just can't take him as the same person.

Except for the really, really base core of the character like his appearance and age and the fact that Ai is his most important person, it's like he's been completely taken over and shifted. It's so confusing, I really don't want to discard what I made out of his character from after what I saw from the movie arc, but I can't bring it together in a logical way of how things are in 161-162 if this is how he's supposed to go and it ISN'T AN ACT. Either this is bad writing(I'm sorry to say that towards another person's work but from a psychological standpoint, I really, really cannot comprehend what this is) or it's intentionally indicating that there is this outer force that's drastically shifted Kamiki's character in an unnatural way. But would it really BE this? In the case of the latter, Ai's wishes if helping him still makes sense because it'd indicate Hikaru really isn't himself and is influenced by the black stars or whatever. Honestly, that's the ONLY way it'd make sense for me for this character to be this way. It IS very out of character if we bring the movie arc portrayals into account. Does the writer know what they're doing with this character? They must, way better than me, but I'm not sure what they want to do with them because the work isn't mine.

I really really am trying to make do and make the best out of what I can of what's been presented in the source material, I always do, but it's INCREDIBLY confusing regarding this character. Right now... I may have to go with the idea that he's ACTUALLY possessed and not himself as bizzare and illogical that may be, or either disregard a huge chunk of the ideas that was set forth in the movie arc(but I am really convinced those were the truths when it comes to this character!!) It's both such a tough choice to make and I really need answers for this case. They don't give us proper answers when it comes to this character. What are they hiding?? I actually think he CAN really be possessed because, that's what the songs could be indicating and plus, that does let us see WHY Ai would request to help this guy out. It's not entirely out of his own will that he's acting wickedly, but under an influence, that's how he's "lost"... So is THIS it? Is THAT what the author is going for? Well for Hikaru's sake and for the sake of consistent writing I do hope this is the case because I can't understand him perfectly unless it's this!! Things just don't work out. I can't possibly portray him as well and it's so difficult, and I never had this happen to me, ever. It's like having a puzzle piece that's from a different set and struggling to fit it in, but it can't happen because it isn't supposed to be there in the first place.

I want to make the best of it, but that's what's happening to me right now.

[ante--meridiem]

Post is under the cut for typical Creepy Ex Landlord content but there's nothing new on that front, just me processing stuff that had happened while the situation was ongoing.

I've been half considering telling my new roommates the real reason I moved out from the previous place because I have reason to believe they'd be understanding and we've definitely reached the level of friendship where that kind of thing can be shared but I hesitate to even call it "sexual harassment" out loud and not on tumblr because to do so I have to interrogate whether I ever actually said no clearly and firmly enough, though at the end of the day I'm fairly confident I did and its failure to get through to him was him just not wanting to listen. I laid out my discomfort to him several times and he apologised and seemed really genuinely guilty/upset and I told him I didn't want him to apologise or feel bad I just wanted him to stop and then he'd go straight back to what he'd been doing before.

I guess what I'm stuck on though is, maybe it's just autistic inability to fully comprehend that people can be lying to me but his belief that he's done nothing seriously wrong or against my consent seems fully genuine. He seemed honestly hurt and confused when I blocked him as soon as I could because he'd really believed we'd still be ""friends"" after I moved out. There was this one time when he was telling me about a news article about a woman who got sexually assaulted and he was all wide-eyed I-just-don't-understand-how-people-could-do-that innocence about it and I truly understood what emotion the phrase "look into the camera like you're on the office" expresses, because really?

I'm pretty sure most of it runs on technicalities and plausible deniability because ok, if you do things without asking that you have plenty of reason to think I wouldn't be ok with then technically I didn't say no, and you can even be proud of yourself for stopping once I do get around to saying it. And if you plead and wheedle with me until I decide it's easier to give you what you want than keep arguing then technically I said yes. But what really throws me is how much he seemed to genuinely believe he was morally in the clear, rather than just having legalistic plausible deniability.

Like, by the end of it and by the time he found out my sexuality, even he couldn't convince himself that I secretly wanted him. Even before he'd found out, he'd mostly switched tack from "so what if you have a boyfriend, he can't tell you what to do" to "what's so wrong with me that you aren't attracted to me? :( I've been so nice to you :(" but he never seemed to have any level of cognitive dissonance over, if I had never had any shred of attraction to him and repeatedly expressed discomfort with him being sexual towards me, why I would have ""consented"" to all the things that I totally definitely freely consented to and he totally definitely never forced on me and pressured me into (please note heavy sarcasm). He really thought I'd stay friends with him, "friends" of course here meaning "we cannot have a conversation that stays for longer than five minutes on a topic other than him commenting on my appearance and asking me for pictures". Like, I get missing signals other people think are clear, but if I found out someone I'd thought was freely consenting to physical intimacy with me (giving him benefit of the doubt that he actually thought that) felt that way my reaction wouldn't be "too bad you're not attracted to me but we'll still be friends where I constantly talk about how pretty you are and what you should wear. I never pressured you into anything btw! Me going oh come on whenever you said no to me was just me being cute!", it would be "oh shit, did I pressure you? I'm so sorry and will leave you alone immediately if that's what you want." And then actually leave them alone.

And this "you cannot honestly believe you're innocent can you? If you really believe that maybe I somehow wasn't clear enough?" doubting on my side is all pretty standard stuff as these kind of situations go I'm pretty sure, and I feel reasonably confident most people would still take my side given full details, but at the same time... even on tumblr I see people making fun of the idea that you should ask verbal consent for every little thing as "puritanical", and while I'm reasonably sure those people are talking about "someone who's been flirting with you leans in for a kiss so you don't ask before going for it" situations and not, this whole thing, I can only think that Creepy Landlord had somehow convinced himself it was that kind of situation.

....anyways.

[royalberryriku]

Also, okay. This is going to be a bit, or VERY, controversial right now and maybe it's a bit much to think about in light of the dread many are feeling...

And yet, there's so much power in understanding how to become fearless in the face of persecution. It's something we're all capable of, but something we don't realise when we're isolated (and I don't simply mean socially, but in terms of having a solid community that will literally and physically protect you).

So, here's a story for all of you of how I became unafraid and how, I hope, you may find a way to break through this dread like I did.

Look. As a transgender person in the middle of transition, who saw the Florida genocide, and yes they were laws constituting a genocide in he eyes of international law towards transgender people in that state and that led to immense violence towards us, all while Biden was in? I... personally just began to feel numb towards every politician or anyone else anymore because they all very evidently wanted/ want us dead. Maybe this comes from a place of ignorance as an Australian queer who doesn't fully comprehend the nuances of state powers versus the president's ability to prevent genocides within their own country, or who has seen the worsening of how we're treated both here and in the US by those who pretend to be our allies only to turn around and support bills aimed at eradicating us. Yet, regardless, I just can't move past this block where I just no longer can only fear Trump, because Biden already made me fear him and every single other politician because we have been dying this whole fucking time over and over and over while people forgot our names the minute they stopped trending. I became so tired by the mass persecution trans people have been facing for so long that I couldn't only feel dread for Trump, because I continued beyond him and people forgot that we were dying before him. I'm numb and only have the desire to rebel against the whole damn system. It's only pushed me further and further into realising I want to eradicate any ability for any people like this to be able to enforce these laws and do nothing in he face of the violence we face every single day. And, more than anything right now, I just cannot fathom how it is possible to see all those years upon years of bigotry, both before and after Trump, and see democrats as allies. All the while they are not only physically endorsing Trump's policies in the context of law, but have had the audacity to claim they don't do so and believe the opposite on camera. It infuriates me and I think it's important to recognise the exhaustion of trans people amidst all of this while we think about the genuine threat of Trump, yet forget the horrors of every other politician who will still enforce Trump's policies while denying they do.

I just can't be scared of Trump alone and hold any hope in other politicians anymore because my greatest fear of "seeing yet another genocide of queer people" was realised over and over after 2020 Biden was in and I now have to acknowledge that, no, democrats are very okay with not intervening in or preventing a genocide against people like me, if not even actively agreeing with it while crying crocodile ears, saying they care so much and morn is while they vote against us in the senate and in state elections. Within that realisation, there was this dread; the understanding that it actually will be the same result for us in the end no matter what a politician says because they'll endorse the other side behind the scenes and that is scary. I spent a long time from 2020 onwards being afraid because the policies Trump introduced in 2016 were not fixed, because I kept seeing that apathy from the democrats as worse and worse policies continued to be implemented even though Trump as supposed to be fine; because I felt nothing changed when Biden was in at all. And this was all even before Florida, though that was the final nail in the coffin where I completely realised how much democrats will actively support our demise and then swear up and down they Won't do that while actively doing that in pratice.

And, now, seeing the imperialist genocide in Palestine and Palestinians internationally having this same dread as me of realising they, too, are the price democrats are willing to pay while dealing on the same stage of people like Trump... Yeah, that shit hurts. But you know what else I learnt in that? The people who suffer the same prosecution from the nation(s) that oppress you will have your back; that community can be something that destroys fascism. Our shared existence has power, one I didn't have in 2016, 2020 or 2023 when people like me dying in the news was just, y'know, the news again and everyone would forget the names of the trans women lynched. Because I know how little trans people mattered to those in power when I was alone, but when I found other people willing to create that change with us? To fight alongside us and protect us? It changed things. I stopped feeling afraid.

I began to speak with indigenous rights advocates in Australia and the US, an I realised I was not alone in feeling like every single politician would sign our death warrant for the right price. I found a community that, irrespective of who was in and what happened in policy, would always protest and, if need be, physically protect me from those policies being enacted. I realised I wasn't alone.

The start may begin with a dress so deep that you feel all motivation to live leave you. But when you realise how many are willing to battle, tooth, nail, pepper spray and all to defend you and keep you safe? When you form those communities where you know you will be protected and you meet people you would rather die than not protect? When you see people from every walk of life fight against the same thing for the sake of all of us? You learn confidence in that and you find the dread ceases. In its place, you feel a warm, burning hope that won't leave until you and this like and unlike yourself are free from all persecution.

[the-rorster]

They said this is a place for me to write down my thoughts so here goes

I literally cannot stop thinking about Betty Weir. She's just so. Beautiful.

Like I genuinely cant even understand like I can't begin to comprehend and explain how beautiful she is. Like. Is it the lip gloss?? Idk 😭😭

And it's weird because I really don't feel like I find myself all that attracted to Benny. I think Benny is attractive, like, objectively, I think hes a good looking guy but like Benny vs Erica or smth I think Ericas prettier and I feel more attracted to her but Erica vs Betty and somehow Betty is so much prettier and I just don't understand how like? A face that I now understand is the same person can be SO BEAUTIFUL while at the same time being like just objectively attractive but not that attractive to me

Long story short Betty Weir is beautiful and I'm in love with her

[explorevenus]

hii! I hope you're having a nice day❤️

If you're not comfortable with the topic feel free to just ignore the ask! But I was just wondering... how would yan!Leon handle his darling having an ED?

Like, would he be more understanding if she didn't want to eat because of that and not cause she just wants to piss him off, as he first thought?

I've just been dealing a lot with EDs lately and a little drabble or just hearing your thoughts about it would help a bit :,) sorry for the little vent.

hiii sorry i'm late, i hope ur having a nice day too !!!! idk if this is at all what u were looking for but i hope it answers ur question and also maybe helps ;n; ily i'm sorry you're having a hard time, angel

tw: ed talk under the cut-- take care of urself and don't read if that's triggering for u !

as someone who also struggles with ed behavior i feel this and i wonder about it too. i think he would understand that she isn't doing it to upset him but at the same time he can't stand to see her neglect herself and for that reason he would have very little patience for it.

for one, he can't even wrap his head around how darling could possibly have any insecurities about herself. to leon, darling is scientifically perfect and it's literal blasphemy to think otherwise.

for two, leon doesn't understand ed's in the slightest. that man lives and breathes food and sincerely cannot even fathom why someone would want to starve themselves just to stay small, especially his darling. he really just can't comprehend the why of it, but he tries to.

for three, leon wants for nothing more than his darling to be healthy and happy, and he knows she can't be either of those things if she's obsessing over food and her body image. it gets to a point where he genuinely can't sleep at night if he isn't certain she's been eating at least a little bit and if she's not, he isn't above force feeding, especially if/when she's pregnant. in his eyes, it's for her own good.

in short i think he tries to be as understanding with her as he can manage while a) not understanding at all and b) trying to 'fix her' in some of the worst possible ways

at the end of the day though, as much as he hates to see her insecure about herself, at least it makes her easy to manipulate

[twilightguardian]

New review from Lilith Fairen where I really begin to wonder if she has reading comprehension so poor that I should feel guilty for being harsh to someone with a mental disability. The lack of fundamental comprehension is that bad.

Either that or she does this on purpose because like CanonSeeker, she thinks that "criticizing the critics" aka bullying, is a sane thing to do.

But of course Lilith doesn't comprehend the first thing about criticism because it has to come from some sort of intellectual place. But she doesn't do that. She's just hating because she hates Celtic Phoenix/Raymond, and not for anything that he's done, but because he's a fan of a show she dislikes: Madoka Magica. She is peak petty and childish.

Where as most so-called "capital C Critics" and "RWDE" are genuine fans of RWBY and look at it through this lens of being a fan, Lilith is not a fan of FRWBY. She doesn't understand the point of it, doesn't comprehend it. It's rather sad considering she's a writer and should know how writing works, and that it can involve editing. Someone who is more artistically inclined takes their criticism to an artistic level, but she doesn't understand this.

Anyway, by now it's clear that I'm not really responding to Lilith or any of her pathetic ilk because they're going to keep doing this no matter what. My goal isn't to communicate with those who have gouged out their ears in order to keep hating. My goal is to make sure anyone who talks about Fixing RWBY and becomes curious about it will see how Lilith and people like her twist things around to lie about a fan project done out of passion, telling people its done out of spite because people like her cannot stand it when people are more successful and popular than her. Especially if it's a man, doubly so a Madoka Magica fan.

You have an illness. You are mentally obligated to make yourself unhappy. Dislike FRWBY all you want, but no one is holding a gun to your head and forcing you to watch a fan video. Having gone through all the saved logs of your previous tumblr, I know for a fact that you have a visceral need to be unhappy. You can't help yourself. Seek therapy or at the very least unplug your internet. Go outside, breathe some fresh air. The internet has obviously not been good for you.

Mistral is canonically meant to be based on Asia. How dare the worldbuilding actually reflect that. No, it should be more Western or else you're fetishizing. Because erasing other cultures from existence for no reason is totally a logical route to take, right? Absolutely bonkers insane fucking logic. This woman is stupid or racist. Pick your poison.

Also keep in mind the only fandom Lilith regularly partakes in is still a Japanese anime. It's fundamentally Asian. All the characters are Japanese and they likely partake in Japanese culture. You write stories based on these characters I guess you're automatically "fetishizing" Asian culture. That is Lilith's twisted ass logic.

Lilith wouldn't know what a good reason was if it slapped her in the face and stole all of her possessions.

Plot isn't the only important thing to the story, and as a writer I'd HOPE that Lilith knows this, but unfortunately it seems not. That doesn't bode well for her story, which I've been struggling to get past the first twenty or so paragraphs.

Essentially what she's complaining about is the fact that characters take some time to actually be people. We get time for the characters to breathe, but more importantly for character relationships and dynamics to be established, enforced, reinforced and enhanced. But no, it's not plot, so it's not important. No wonder she likes the canon show, which neglects this. If she does this with Glints Saga as well, I can't see many people actually caring about the characters or the romance she's so interested in writing for in the first story. Then again, I'm sure she's perfectly fine with it if it's in something like Precure. Though she only seems to like a la mode.

Look at how the logic here doesn't follow. The girls are aided a little bit by their companions which means they aren't protagonists.

Apparently according to Lilith a protagonist is someone who doesn't get assistance from anyone ever, who doesn't interact with anyone. Effectively what Lilith wants is a mary sue protagonist, which canon RWBY never was nor will Fixing RWBY Team RWBY ever be. Plus the girls in canon get help from other characters all the time, and rarely do anything for themselves unless Jaune brings up an idea first and if they do it's after sitting around a whole lot and the only thing they manage to accomplish is getting a lot of things destroyed and people killed.

Raymond also hates the female protagonists so much that he makes them more active characters in their own story than canon. Because he hates them. Makes perfect sense.

Lilith once again showing she knows nothing about anything. Changing the location of a scene from a train station to a festival and expanding upon it isn't padding. Unless Lilith is actually a critic after all. She's using Fixing RWBY as a way to critique the canon show but hide it behind the guise of hating on a "critic" so she doesn't lose her friend group. Because heck knows she doesn't have friends anywhere else from the look of it.

She doesn't understand what padding is in a story. Padding is useless fluff that adds nothing to a story. If there are important character dynamics going on, and worldbuilding being shown through the setting, it's not padding. Simple as.

Raymond's writing of Madoka fanfiction has nothing to do with this. Lilith is trying to label Raymond a pedophile, I suppose, which is incredibly cunty behaviour. Salem is canonically 16 during the setting of The Lost Fables and yet her design makes her look like she'd fit in with the cast of Grease. Making a 16 year old actually LOOK like a 16 year old isn't gross, Lilith. Grow the fuck up, I implore you.

This is what happens when you only scroll through the video. Neo, Ruby, Yang, Weiss, Roman and Qrow are all framing devices. Neo just happened to be the first one, followed by Yang. But she wouldn't know that because she doesn't pay attention. Her goal, despite calling Fixing RWBY a "spitefic" is to act spiteful and to lie and be a massive bitch in service of defending a show that she barely cares about and likely wouldn't if it hadn't been for hearing through the grapevine that RWBY had a massive "hatedom".

Also really telling how obsessed Lilith is with the idea of subservience. I'd think she's projecting quite a bit. Just like how obsessed she is with complaining about Fixing's Shiloh or Roman. Raymond lives in her head rent free.

Ahh. So she does know that Neo isn't the only framing device used. Love that she implied that but then had to admit that's not true. It didn't even take her a full paragraph to admit she lied.

You can dislike the framing device all you want, but it's more engaging than what canon did. It also wasn't pointless, and her saying that it was doesn't make it true. The point of it was to show that these are stories that the girls know, possibly modified over the millennia, to show that these stories are all interconnected. These are fairy tales of Remnant, but also those fairy tales weren't the whole truth. Lilith can't comprehend anything unless it's directly spelled out to her, and she admits it by calling it confusing. If it requires her to rev up a braincell, it's too confusing. Just sit back and consume product, that's how you watch RWBY, this is bad because it makes you think!

She doesn't want to summarize the rest of it because it's actually good and that ruins her narrative lol

Yes, I repeat, a child didn't look like a child. It's like those really cheap 80's movies where a 14 year old is played by a 38 year old. Yes, I totally believe you're a high school student, sir.

It's apparently wrong to want Salem to look as old as Ruby was during volume 1. Because she looks like she's 30. She looks no different than she is now when you take off the special effects. She looked no different in age than when she had children, which is unfortunate.

lmao she's mad

Like what does she want? This isn't an AU or a full rewrite. It's a reconstruction project with the goal in mind to show how RWBY could be a lot better with a couple of little tweaks and changes. Like I said earlier, what Raymond is doing is essentially developmental editing. He's not the author so he's not going to do any major changes to the story. Ozpin still has a host at the end of the day. Vernal was still a little servant of Raven and died. These preserve the overall plot beats of the stories while being different, but there's nothing that fundamentally changes by design. That's on purpose.

There's a difference between hating or being frustrated with aspects of a show and hating the entire thing. Raymond falls into the former camp. He likes RWBY. Doesn't mean he can't have problems with it. That's too much for some people's little pea brains to understand and that's very unfortunate. It creates unnecessary division and toxicity in the fandom than there should or really needs to be.

Some people have this revulsion to others actually wanting to engage with their fandoms in ways those people don't like and have this sense of entitlement to the fandom and what goes on in them. It's a disturbing trend, especially with those that have a problem with discourse and critique. Some think that any kind of fandom engagement that isn't wholly, unquestioningly positive is automatically hate and that's disturbing.

It's really not. Raymond has only watched the first episode and he disliked it, though couldn't put his finger on why. This has nothing to do with that spinoff, and I have no idea why Lilith would think that. The episode was recontextualizing a bunch of fairy tales in Remnant's world that everyone would have known.

Raymond has said a few times that he doesn't want to touch Fairy Tales of Remnant because he has no interest in it at all, so there would be no sense for him to do it in episodes 6&7 of all things.

It's commendable that Lilith is trying very hard to use that dusty old thing in her head, but she's still got a ways to go. Her logic doesn't follow, the speculation that she has doesn't come from anywhere and has no follow through.

She loves repeating herself, doesn't she? Girl, this isn't twitter. Saying things over and over and over doesn't make it more true.

Just because you can't comprehend why something was done doesn't necessarily make it bad lol

Also can't say that I've really come across anyone except for Lilith who says it's disorienting, which leads me to the conclusion that until further evidence of someone who isn't an "anti-Critic" says the framing device was confusing, that it's said deliberately to have something to complain about, because otherwise, there would be nothing to complain about. She's already struggling so much with this review because she knows it wasn't that bad so she has to look for things. I am so happy that Lilith is so boringly predictable that I said hours before her 'review' came out that she was going to focus on Neo being the first in line for the framing of the story.

What's telling about it, Lilith? The point of words is to actually have meaning behind what is being said.

She says the emphasis isn't on Team RWBY, but they take up the majority of the transitions.

Neo to Young Yang, Adult Yang to Young Blake to Adult Blake, Young Weiss to Adult Weiss, Young Ruby to Adult Ruby to Teen Qrow to Adult Qrow then finally to Young Roman. So she's not even correct that Qrow ends the section. Neo and Roman bookend the segment, but the meat of the segment is taken up by Team RWBY+Q.

Now, could he have started with a member of Team RWBY? Sure, definitely. But if you look at the bolded names you'll notice a pattern.

1 2 2 3 3 4 4 5 5 6

The bookends get the first and last, but the middle portions get double focus. It balances out.

Only Ruby's weapon is damaged, but it's presumed to still be able to fight in gun form. She just cannot transform it into a scythe. He said nothing about Blake's weapon, Yang's weapon, Weiss' weapon or any other weapon. Not only are none of the other characters are impacted due to their weapons. Yang and Neo are injured. Blake, Weiss and even Ruby are still readying to fight.

Also really ironic she's so bent out of shape that she thinks FRWBY doesn't have the main characters do anything when canon doesn't allow them to do much, either. Why aren't you complaining about that, Lil? Could it be that she doesn't actually care? She just has such a hateboner for Raymond because he likes Madoka.

Raymond has never insisted that everything about RWBY is 'horrible and terrible'. It's heavily flawed, and frustratingly so. Raymond has consistently been the more positive person of his reaction friend group over the years, often saying he likes many things of the show. But Lilith doesn't know this because unlike me, who tried to understand Lilith before speaking about her, she's only seen his skits and videos specifically for Fixing RWBY. She knows nothing about him, and thinks nothing of trying to pin every terrible thing she can think of onto him, from pedophile to racist.

Lilith doesn't understand the concept of deep editing. Not anything beyond the basics of spelling, grammar and maybe attempting to change a few minor points around. Comparing the beginning to her older draft of Glints Saga: Papillon to her newer version, she doesn't do much significant to change it.

Don't get me wrong, it's BETTER than the older version, but that's not saying much. Lilith is too precious with her story to do something like what Raymond is doing: a developmental edit, a large edit that might change a lot of things but make the overall story better.

And Matrixdragon decided to chime in as well.

Yang is trying to stave off hypothermia with Neo. She can probably move, but it wouldn't be the best thing for her. But like I said above, Yang's weapons are not damaged.

I think this is actually a fair criticism, and one I've seen a little bit with other people. To each their own, really. It's not like RWBY didn't try and do the same thing with Volume 1 and the whole background NPCs, keeping the events isolated to a small group of important characters. What Raymond is doing here is cutting out background characters that don't need to be there and can be filled with other ones, ones that can lead to better character dynamics and interactions than if they were strangers. Some people are going to like that, and some people won't, and that's fine. It's certainly not unique to FRWBY and no one else complains when coincidences for story happen in any other franchise, though. So it's a little eyerolling when it's suddenly a problem because a fan did it for a fixit fic.

Do old ladies have a stereotype of being curious? Maria didn't wander into the middle of a battle zone during her first introduction in canon, either, so what's your point? The whole train was being attacked so it wouldn't matter where she'd go she'd still be in the middle of a battle zone. We know from context that she's a former huntress but it makes no sense otherwise why she'd wander in other than to have a contrivance that she's there, which makes the contrivance more noticeable. We don't even learn that she can still fight until late into the Atlas arc.

At least with Fixing RWBY's new introduction of Maria, she is shown off the bat to be a capable fighter and we know right away that she likely came to the area to help fight. That makes the contrivance more understandable as a reason why she'd be there. She's a character that got a lot of focus in canon even if she just walked past the camera because she has a highly unique character design, so it's not a secret she's going to be important, and some people even rightly pointed out she was likely a silver-eyed warrior due to how they framed the opening to the anime.

The characters don't trust Roman. Blake certainly doesn't. But they acknowledge he's in this with them for better or worse and now they're all stranded together, so there wouldn't be any point in lying to everyone.

Yang is not someone I would call 'mature' in canon. Being an angry little sourpuss when things don't go her way or someone challenges them is not what anyone would consider mature.

It's also not that Yang is unwilling to give Blake a chance, either. She hasn't completely forgiven Blake for what she'd done, and Yang is under no obligations to forgive her, either. Forgiving someone has nothing to do with maturity, and the fact that this seems to imply you think so is unsettling. It means that someone cannot have feelings about something traumatic that happened, and the more 'adult' thing to do would be to just get over it. Things like this don't resolve overnight. They take time, and before Yang and Blake can become a proper couple, they need to properly work things out, not sidestep the issue and pretend like nothing's wrong until there might be, then step on eggshells around each other, wondering if the other is mad at them for no reason.

I don't think Adam gave a shit about being detected. It's not like he was trying to ninja his way through the train car. It also wasn't just Cardin he had to deal with, but Qrow and Russel at the same time. I honestly don't remember whether Cardin was a competent fighter in canon, but we know he was at least tactical and not an idiot. So 'the likes of Cardin' only means someone thinks he's an incompetent fighter because he's a bully. But Cardin in Fixing isn't like Cardin in canon. He was more competent in the scenes where he fought and he likely became stronger during aftermath of Beacon.

The only ones being spiteful around here are you two. It's seriously pathetic.

[pttucker]

"Thank you." The words spilled out and Yoo Joonghyuk replied indifferently. "Don't say anything that isn't in your heart. I know you dislike me." "Of course, I dislike you. I hate you. You are the person who took my role." "I don't know what that means." In Lee Sookyung's head, time flowed slowly. She heard that it should move quickly… then why? Was it because it was hard and difficult? "…I've known you from a long time ago. That kid often talked about you. He came to visit his mother in prison and only talked about this." –This time, he challenged the 12 gods of Olympus. The young face of Kim Dokja as he talked happily. Many thoughts had floated on this child's face. Yoo Joonghyuk spoke like he felt Lee Sookyung's heart rate slowing down. "Lee Sookyung. Don't let go of your mind." Lee Sookyung barely maintained her blurring consciousness. She continued to be drowsy on Yoo Joonghyuk's back. "In any case, at least once… I wanted to thank you." "You are saying things that I can't understand."

Okay, so I've been thinking this for a while now but is Joonghyuk perhaps literally unable to comprehend that he's a character in a novel?

Like, at first I just thought it was a secret (obviously it was) and he didn't know and then I thought that maybe, for some reason, he just didn't care because he's so goal-motivated and has crushed down all his own emotions beyond what's needed to save the world, but now I'm really starting to wonder if he literally cannot process it. Like maybe he has his own version of Fourth Wall but it stops him from realizing that he's a character in a novel no matter what people say.

Like, Han Sooyoung literally calls him "protagonist" to his face but it's Han Sooyoung so it's quite possible he brushed it off as that's just how she sees the world as a writer.

But we also have the fact that people were starting to recognize that the world was following TWSA way back before Dokja got lost for three years, heck people were recognizing it both inside and outside the Seoul dome way back when he pretended to be Joonghyuk for the first time. Since then, rumors have been spread all across the internet and there's apparently still functioning news agencies because Dokja's party members are treated like celebrities.

So you'd think by now that it has to be common knowledge right? If nothing else, Sooyoung can't have been the only person to ever say something weird or act weird around the Yoo Joonghyuk. It wouldn't shock me at all if people haven't tried to interview him like they did with Heewon and Jihye.

So does he genuinely have no feelings in regards to finding out he's a fake person? Do none of the other characters not care either? We've had plenty of POV scenes from other characters but thinking about it, the one time that we see the novel openly discussed is between Dokja and his mom, Dokja and Sooyoung, Sooyoung and Sangah...all non-characters...

And now we have Dokja's mom trying to have this serious conversation with Joonghyuk and he's saying he doesn't understand and while you can take that to mean that he doesn't understand how he helped Dokja since he's only recently met him, I'm starting to wonder if it's not more literal - that he literally can't process what she's talking about.

Like, Dokja literally just got done showing the giants the literal scenes of TWSA and Joonghyuk had no reaction whatsoever. Like, maybe in that particular instance he wasn't able to see those scenes, only Dokja and the giants could, but still...

"Where are your parents?" "I was told they died in an accident." "You don't sound sad." "I can't grieve what I can't remember." Lee Sookyung knew. He didn't remember because it wasn't in the original novel. Everything about Yoo Joonghyuk was just a character setting. From the beginning, Yoo Joonghyuk's parents didn't exist. Lee Sookyung hesitated for a moment. "Yes, humans are like this. Do you think I remember all my childhood?" "…Is it memory loss?" "Everyone gets memory loss. Little by little, we will forget our memories and one day, we will forget everything."

And then on the other side we have this. It almost feels like Sookyung is trying to reassure him that it's normal not to remember things that happened when they were children and she specifically goes out of her way to say humans are like this. Like she's trying to tell him that he's still a human and reassure him that this is normal and not from him literally being a made up person.

So maybe he does know and has just been quietly processing it? Or maybe he does have a Fourth Wall, maybe all the characters do, but instead of blocking them from understanding, their versions keep their reactions to the real world muted whereas Dokja's keeps his reactions to TWSA muted? So they're aware but just can't bring themselves to care???

Like, I could see maybe one or two people just genuinely not caring, and maybe one of those people is Joonghyuk just because of how emotionally exhausted he has to be by now (both him AND 1863rd) but you're telling me that Lee Jihye doesn't have some opinions on all of that? Lee Hyunsung hasn't at least asked Dokja what he was like in the novel? Shin Yoosung hasn't asked about what she did in a future without Dokja taking her under his wing?

And then finally we have this:

Yoo Joonghyuk spoke, "Sometimes I remember things. I remember someone watching me." It was the first time Lee Sookyung heard this story and she wondered, "…Who was watching you?" "I don't know either. There was a gaze watching me for a long time. There were times when I often felt the gaze." After Yoo Joonghyuk's words were over, Lee Sookyung didn't talk for a long time. There was a long silence before Lee Sookyung laid her hands on Yoo Joonghyuk's head and spoke in a gentle voice. "Maybe it was your parents." Lee Sookyung stared up at the sky. Numerous constellations were watching them.

I feel like Sookyung is once again trying to make him feel better by saying it was his parents but at the same time Joonghyuk isn't really connecting the whole "Dokja came to talk to me about you every day when he was younger" to "Dokja knows my entire life story including my future" to "someone has been watching me for years." Or, if he is connecting the two, he's unwilling to verbalize it and just seems like he's side-stepping the whole issue?? So either he can't process that he's a character or can but can't really feel it?

Well, if nothing else, I do love it when we get mentions of Joonghyuk feeling like someone was with him during his hardships just the same as Dokja felt that Joonghyuk was there with him during his.

[morethanwonderful]

Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng's relationship fucks me up so much because, like, as much as they love each other, and even though they grew up together, they are completely unable to comprehend each other's emotional realities. Even when one of them can see the objective facts of the other's suffering, they can never let themselves fully understand what it means, and this all leads to so much miscommunication and unnecessary pain.

For example: objectively speaking, Wei Wuxian is abused by Madame Yu. She regularly whips him as a punishment (to the point that his back is covered in scars through his teenage years), and she also seems to have a habit of scapegoating him and punishing him alone for being an instigator, even when Jiang Cheng and the shidi have also committed whatever crime Wwx is being punished for. Even by the standards of a society that endorses corporal punishment for children, this is unreasonable and cruel.

Jiang Cheng knows how his mother treats Wei Wuxian. He also, judging by how he reacts when things escalate during Wang LingJiao's visit, at least tries to talk her down when things begin to go too far, which means he can recognize what she's doing as wrong. However, even though he knows, intellectually, that his mother is unjust and cruel to Wei Wuxian, I don't think he's ever truly absorbed the reality of what that means. I don't think he's ever processed what the effects of this treatment are for Wwx emotionally, or how it might have informed his relationship with the Yunmeng Jiang.

The man spent years of his life being constantly abused for "causing trouble for his sect." Of course his reaction in the face of crisis is to cut ties with Lotus Pier in order to spare them. But do you think Jiang Cheng ever considers that when he's raging over Wwx "choosing the Wen over him?" No.

Because the thing is, the full ramifications of his mother's actions are an unacceptable reality for Jiang Cheng. He cannot consider them. The Jiang sect defines his entire life; it defines him as a kid when his parents groom him to be sect leader, and it defines him even moreso as a young adult, when the sect is all he has left and rebuilding it becomes his life's mission. And even his mother, who he knows is cruel, gives him plenty of reasons to want to remember her well. Her last living act is to sacrifice herself to save him (and the sect by extension). So with all that in mind, how can he possibly internalize the cruelty of Wei Wuxian's treatment? How can he genuinely accept and internalize that the mother who saved his life very nearly ruined Wwx's? How can he face the fact that the Yunmeng Jiang sect, the guiding star of his life, violently abused their head disciple (a child that the inner Jiang clan itself had welcomed into their family)?

He can't.

Jiang Cheng may know the facts of Wei Wuxian's abuse, and he may think he understands it, but he never truly has, because accepting it would run counter to the Jiang Sect's fundamental goodness. And this means that, despite their brotherhood, he has never understood Wei Wuxian’s reality.

And on Wei Wuxian's end, though it's a less severe case (since Jiang Cheng's suffering isn't such blatant abuse), he skates over his brother's troubles in exactly the same way.

Jiang Fengmian is emotionally distant from his son, showing him notably less open affection than he does Wei Wuxian, and this has a pretty major effect on Jiang Cheng. Growing up knowing that one of your parents doesn't like you fucking sucks. And Wei Wuxian is well aware of the difference in how Jiang Fengmian's treatment of him. He straight up points out that Jfm probably wouldn't have come to Gusu if Jiang Cheng had been the one in trouble, and he later tries to justify the difference in affection as a natural result of their situation.

Yet, though he's aware of the issue, his reaction is always to try and reassure Jiang Cheng that it's not that bad, and he shouldn't worry about the issue. If he ever stops to really consider what effect Jfm's distance might be having on Jiang Cheng, we certainly never see him do it.

Because for Wei Wuxian, Jiang Fengmian is a massive force for good. He saved him from a life on the streets, and he's the kind and friendly face to contrast with Madame Yu's abuse. It would be really difficult for someone, especially a teenager, to reconcile that kind of goodness with "bad father," so he brushes off the issue and insists that everything is natural and fine. It's a way of protecting himself and his own relationship with Jfm as much as it is a way of comforting Jiang Cheng.

And overall, this kind of miscommunication is everywhere with the two of them. They don't understand each other's moral codes, and they can't bring themselves to fully process/accept the other's trauma, and it's one of the main things that ends up destroying their relationship. Even when they have all the same facts, they just. cannot understand each other's emotional realities.

[ssaalexblake]

Don't you think that it's a bit dodgy how 13 basically kills a TARDIS to kill the Daleks and never gets called out on it?

Oh it's super messed up she did it, it's also a bit messed up she wasn't called on it, either, lbr, but this has been one of those things i'm not sure how i feel about. Because hm, hello, that was a murder. That they didn't face consequences for, or even a call out. But also, it's not the first time the doctor's done a murder and not been called on it or faced any consequences for, it happens occasionally.

I know it's happened more than once, but hilariously the only one i can remember rn is one also written by chibnall. Maybe he just has a ~thing (I am talking about dinosaurs on a space ship, which is an episode i hate and probably only remember Because i can't stand it, but still). I distinctly remember rewatching the episode and thinking to myself that I could add that to my list of episodes where the doctor offs somebody, and now I can't remember the others, which is typical, really. Though, I personally think 12 pushed the guy, because he'd never have jumped on his own, so that moment's on the list.

(this whole list was a Thing to start with bc i find it fascinating that the doctor sometimes casually does genocides and doesn't catch Half the fandom crap for it than they do if they kill one person. Something something about crimes that we are able to comprehend and feel emotionally and those we aren't. Like, I cannot comprehend the total annihilation of a species in a single second at all, but I can comprehend a single death and have an emotional response to that one. I find it fascinating ngl).

But to get back on subject, in the end, I think my real answer to this would be to say that it depends on Why she's not called on it. When it aired, people in fandom immediately clocked what she'd done was bad and messed up, so obviously a telling was not strictly Necessary in that people worked it out for themselves.

But, was she not called out for it in the show bc A) they didn't believe it was Necessary to do so bc it wasn't supposed to be bad, B) they didn't believe it was necessary to do so because they realised the audience members both old enough to understand and familiar enough with the snow to know tardises are alive would realise what had happened Without mentioning it and know what she'd done was bad without a hand hold or C) she was not called on it simply because there was nobody To call her on it.

Or it could be a mix of the three different things above. Like, they thought it was messed up for her to do it, but she simply was not called on it bc it was exactly like a few of her other greatest and very messed up hits. Nobody had the context to call her on it, so she wasn't called on it even though it Was messed up just because nobody knew it was messed up.

I like, work on a case by case basis as to whether media should call out its characters for bad behaviour and if it's wrong for them not to because you can't paint everything with the same brush and have any sense of nuance, so I guess I think it depends on if you think it's acceptable or not for a show to portray a character doing something bad that is obviously bad without mentioning it, and if that not doing so implies any kind of acceptance of it. I don't think in general the lack of call outs in media imply acceptance, personally, but that doesn't mean there aren't times when call outs Are necessary.

But I do genuinely think it depends on their reasoning as to if it's actually dodgy they didn't do it or not. Like, if they didn't call her on it bc she apparently did nothing wrong, that's dodgy as hell. If they didn't because they portrayed something bad and trusted the audience to get that without being told, that's ambiguous to me and i am personally unsure how i feel about this instance, and since i've not worked it out in two years, I don't expect to any time soon.

If they didn't do it for watsonian reasons involving the lack of informed knowledgeable characters actually there to call her on it, then i'm fine with that in a vacuum? The fam don't ever actually work out if they think the tardis is alive or some kind of super argumentative AI and that 13 implodes one would probably suggest the ai thing to them, lets be real (even though they'd be very wrong, she hides her worst from them). Jack has basically been trained by the doctor to not ask too many questions at this point by the doctor treating him awfully when he does, And on top of that, he's more ruthless than the doctor to start with and I doubt he'd care much.

I think, in general, instead of a callout, i'd have personally liked a Consequence instead? I don't think bad actions necessarily require a call out bc audiences aren't thick and neither are kids, especially In context of the lack of people to call her out on it. But I do think that consequences should be more often utilised unless you're deliberately showing a moment where somebody Gets Away With Something.

So I'd have loved a consequence for her. Like, 13 desperately needs another tardis being alive and well to do something vital and Oh No the world is going to burn to a cinder bc she killed the last one in a callous last ditch plan which suddenly makes it very clear exactly What she did by killing one! So she's slapped in the face by it even though she didn't have anybody to call her on it at the time. The audience is reminded that what she did was wrong without compromising characterisation, ~viola.

TLDR, it depends on Why she wasn't called on it as to if i think it's necessarily dodgy she wasn't (personally i'd have called her on it, but I don't think it's an automatic black mark she wasn't considering the circumstances of there being nobody would could effectively do so), but i do think it's dodgy she didn't catch any consequences for it, actually? idk, i would have done it differently but i'm a terrible writer so I don't know how. I also would like to know the plan for this show pre-pandemic so i can see what didn't happen through necessity via episode cuts and what didn't happen bc nobody thought it was necessary. It's so hard trying to pick apart anything post rotd without knowing this.

[dual-fantasy]

you're so real. vito leaves him in the far corner with absolutely nothing near it except an ipad because theres no physical way for him to get hurt. the ipad explodes in his hands. i think just sitting in a car as it moves is too much for him. theyre desperately trying to find ways he can be included but everything is dangerous to him. the bubble was for his own good. he was born this way the doctors probably dropped him. the bubble was the only way to keep him alive. i think if he went anywhere near any kind of american food he'd drop dead on the spot. he can't physically handle seeing corn syrup. they took him to a firework show and he had a heart attack like a hamster. they cant take him anywhere cause he'll probably die on the way. chesters just The Guy to me. brick gets sick and hes like back in my day if we fell ill we'd be taken out back and shot. He looks at cameron and starts seething. steam pouring out of his ears. his worst enemy in the whole wide world. cameron watches manitoba eat a handful of dirt and he almost dies. he cannot comprehend anything that guy does. manitoba drinks water straight out of the sea and cameron collapses. family guy death pose. i think the Bike Household has a dog. something like a german shepherd. its named stinky. worst dog ever. its trained to bite gingers in case scott ever comes near their house

the iPad exploding made me fucking hysterical. Vito looks away for one second and he looks back and there's a cameron-shaped hole in the wall and a bunch of gunpowder and smoke in the air. he got put into the bubble after he was dropped off a table. noone understands how he's alive. he looks at those water-tok drink of the days and his spine dissolves like a bath bomb. they celebrated new year's eve together and he literally cannot do anything but crumple and die. what is his problem

chester is literally just A Guy. like the pinnacle of A Guy. being taken out back and being shot made me cackle. back in his day you didn't "read books" you are the papers and had to perfectly recite it. brick is making the bed and he's like back in my day we didn't have this fancy bedding we slept on haystacks and horse shit. Cameron isn't allowed to be near him because he fucking lights on fire out of rage. exploding Cameron with his mind. despises him genuinely.

Manitoba is so fucked up but in the exact opposite way of Cameron. he can do whatever he wants and not get hurt. gets bitten by the most dangerous snake literally ever and hes totally fine. he bites a shark back because it tried to bite him ankle. Cameron cannot comprehend it

bike.... what a name.... bike household so real though. it's a bad dog. it's so annoying they've gotten like seven noise complaints in the past three days. mike trained it to attack gingers and also anyone who smells like dirt. this is detrimental to Manitoba but he literally feels nothing so it's fine. literally the worst dog ever but they love it. legally it's not considered a dog tho