#and gave up trying to make it better
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saw some mangy dog on the outskirts of town
#my art#oc#els#werewolf#furry#anthro#illustration#you would not believe the hassle this gave me lmao....i want to do more with it but i have to wipe my hands of it#idk if this looks good but it has to be finished i have to be finished with it#WORD OF ADVICE that allows a small glimpse into the horrible time i've had: PLAN YOUR COMPOSITIONS#GOD. initial drawing of els: 1-2 hours at most. trying to find a composition that doesn't suck: 100000 hours and ongoing#i think my problem is this els looks better zoomed in but finding a way to keep it zoomed in....mission impossible#i love this els face though. i will admit. i had to persevere to get SOMETHING that at least vaguely worked so i could show off this els#okay. okay. anyway it's greengage season again. big ups to greengages for making life just that much brighter#also the owls are goin crazyyy outside my window rn they are speaking and i am listening. in a delirium
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Boo!!! get ghosted (lol)
#fnaf gregory#fnaf security breach#i dont even know why i made him all ghostly i just think it looked better???#anyways i just wanted to try actual colours again… (<- only makes monochrome stuff)#also i think this looks very dreamlike lol at least to me it does#dont look at the water. just dont. i tried my best and gave up🩷
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why a B? what was the critique?
this sounds kind of cope i stg its not i would go into it more if it was like helpful or insightful TRUST. but genuinely the feedback was kinda.. incoherent and contradictory...?!? and i got penalised a lot for stuff that i was pretty clearly told was fine during crit whilst working on it. feels a bit vindictive to me and if it was graded by a particular lecturer which im 99% sure it was i have a feeling i know why
#im gonna try and get it reevaluated by someone who wasn't fucking creepy toward me </3#i should specify too it was 2 points off an A because it looks like he gave me the absolute bare minimum points he could for each category#like i got penalised for time management because i missed a week and then managed to catch up the next one#some people didn't start the work til 4 weeks into the module and still got higher grades for that?#i don't know man#copium#not ruling out the possibility it was just kind of mid#but at the very least i want some cogent feedback on how to make it better#ask
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i can’t stop thinking about your waterbender!megumi au..,, like yes he’s more specialized in healing but would not hesitate in using waterbending to protect you from whoever or whatever (even if he prob loses😭) he might even learn bloodbending from the village’s hermit choso who knows🤷🏽♀️ and lmao him just giving you a betrothal necklace without verbally proposing you… i hate (love) this dork
even if he prob loses LOLL megumi is such a loser but it’s okay he fights valiantly <33 but yeah, him spending all his time with his mom and all the elders in the village healing and homemaking and cooking because his style of water bending is so soothing and calm, and also he’s a huge mama’s boy, and also because everyone likes to use his and toji’s strength to their advantage to get them to do the heavy lifting, but the second there’s a threat to you, he pulls out all the stops. suddenly he’s a trained fighter and master waterbender oh he’s so beloved to me <33
the necklace thing to me is like how katara was wearing her grandmother’s betrothal necklace without knowing it? he took a trip to the opposite pole where the tradition is engagement necklaces or bracelets or whatever significant piece of jewelry, and comes back with one for you and just. gives it to you, no explanation and then a day later someone else notices it and grins ear to ear congratulating you and megumi and you’re like ????? and it’s not until his mom is like “oh he did it! tell me all about the proposal!” and now megumi is dodging icicles you’re bending his way bc who proposes without proposing. but it’d also be equally hilarious if he also didn’t know it was betrothal jewelry and was just trying to be romantic and now you’re engaged LOLL
#anonymous#it’s technically self plagiarism if i say he gave you the necklace with the intention of marriage but didn’t tell you LMFAO#but i think it’s equally megumi to just. try and be Stereotypically Romantic and end up accidentally proposing#also extra bonus if after all this toji was like well. if it makes it any better ur grandparents wanted to betrothe the two of you to#each other at birth bc of conflicts at the time anyway so congrats!#(toji is then splashed with water by his wife)#atla au#jjk x reader
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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you
#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what#allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of#the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than#to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do#im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt#take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was#mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their#mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that#explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain#direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in#arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to#engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out#theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive#a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked#picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing#sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example#for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war#is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old#wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for#steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with#especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can#look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never#treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time#but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made#feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them#accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me#yapping#diary
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Re-design of my un-named Beetlejuice OC from back when I was thirteen
Original Reference under the cut:
#my art#beetlejuice#toonjuice#beetlejuice cartoon#beetlejuice fanart#beetlejuice movie#procreate#I don’t really make OC’s for fanwork anymore… but the ones I had when I was younger almost never got named 🥲#When I first made her I really really liked her- and her story was very self indulgent#Looking at it now is almost way too weird for me… (and honestly a little unintentionally homophobic???)#Basically she was one of the girls from Dante’s inferno… except she got kicked out because she only had attraction to girls#(This was BEFORE I suspected that I was a lesbian— mind you.)#Yeah but anyway she went to the Deetz/Maitland house looking for a place to stay but drove everybody crazy#She was super flamboyant- loved everything pink n fluffy- and was well meaning but did more harm than good trying to do nice things for the#She had this one sided crush on Delia??? Like musical Beej and Adam except less perverted and more flirty/sappy? I was an odd kid- okay? 🥲#Anyway… the old design didn’t really do much to show off her personality… so I ended up upheaving the whole thing#It was okay for what I knew at the time- but I know what I was trying to say then and now I have the knowledge to say it better#Also— the reason I gave her horns here is so silly.#When I was younger I was in a Christian school where I wasn’t allowed to draw witches-ghosts-demons-etc.#So even though I based her on the Dante girls… I refused to give her horns because I thought that was ‘too sinful’#I even remember having so much guilt while looking for references of the Dante workers#I couldn’t even look for more than five seconds!#Anyways… she really pushed the boundaries for me at the time and it’s fun to see how I’ve changed and grown since then.
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just kill me
#this whole article is bad but this was the WORST#not even for the reason you think (819 reasons)#Eliza you've already heard this rant but#if I can be way too sincere and long-winded for a moment#'always if I ask him something he helps'#how many quotes do we have from teammates over the years saying that exact thing#michael latta saying 'it doesn't matter if you're a top pair dman or a 4th line peasant; he'll do anything to help you'#christian djoos saying 'he's always there for you no matter what time or place. if something's up he's always there'#HHA saying recently nicke gave him his number and told him 'if you need anything just call me and I can help you'#carly in that interview when this was announced saying how nicke has been the support for everyone in that locker room from himself and osh#to guys who haven't been there long like strome and even pacioretty#I know holts and batya and andre and rasmus and jojo and tj and tom and karl alzner have all said stuff like this too#and that's just who I can think of off the top of my head#like. that's it. that's nicke.#if you ask him something. he helps.#for such an amazing athlete. for such a crucial part of making hockey A Thing in DC.#what his teammates want to talk about is his kindness#and that speaks so highly of him and is so genuinely admirable to me and worth aspiring to#I don't want to put anyone on a pedestal because we don't know these guys#but like. in terms of impact. nicke really genuinely made me try to be a better more thoughtful more actively outreaching friend#because I saw the way his teammates talked about him and that's how I want to be thought of.#I want people to know I'll be there for them. & not that I haven't been willing to do that but I've been more active about offering it#and part of that genuinely is because of his example#there's a million other things about his kindness I could mention before I even get to his hockey but this has already gone on far too long#so anyway#he is so dear to me#I hope he is happy and healthy#and that he knows how loved he is#nicklas backstrom#hockey
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NewAgeAU Drabble - Nine does not equal Ten
Hi @spotaus ! I am not even sorry at this point!! I had an idea and I think by the title you can guess what it is about this time :3
We are in post story again! (i am keeping my strike going lmao) but this time? very different character. Nine :3 (also. Xundyne's name for now is Ranha, from piranha... because she is a fish monster and well... I wanted a fish themed name for her lmao)
Also warning. Nine think very degrading and judgemental. in case that bothers you.
He is also a very unreliable narrator lmao.
*----------------*
Nine makes sure to frown as he crosses his arms while his king, and co-king honestly, disappear into the meeting room with the brat that calls himself a king.
Nine only acts annoyed of course. He knew he wouldn't be allowed into the meeting room and he had been planning on it. It is hard to search this place if he is suposed to be in one room.
Ranha stands by his side, huffing and puffing as she mutters stuff under her breath. She is honestly annoyed with not being allowed inside the meeting room. Nine is sure she will be fine with it after he shares his plan.
Nine watches the brat acting as king lead his own king and his right hand inside. They would both be named king after the coup but the resistance hadn't wanted to push the people of Ritten too far. Nine watches as the crown prince, prince Dream, follows the child and Nine still doens't understand why Dream hasn't taken the crown yet. It can't be that hard to take the power from the younger skeleton. How Nightmare is still seen as king is a mystery to Nine.
Sure it seems like things are okay after three years but Nine knows not to bindly believe people. He had hoped that Ten would have finally learned that lesson by now but it seems that wasn't the case. But that is okay. Nine will be the great brother he was meant to be and get through to Ten and get him home. Easy.
The meeting room door closes and Nine nudges his best friend "Hush." and he nods towards the side. Ranha tilts her head and her red hair shifts slightly. She glances at the door before following him down the hallway.
"What is the big deal Nine?" She seems puzzles.
Nine looks back over his shoulder but nothing happens. Hah. See? And this is why Nightmare still being seen as king is a mystery to him. Those Knights are nothing but hot air as he doesn't even see any of them following him, no wonder Ten got accepted into the role so quickly, the knights clearly can't spot a single threat even when it is right in front of them. All he sees behind them is a prestine looking cat watching them.
"I knew they weren't going to let us join the meeting."
Ranha looks annoyed "Then why did you ask me to join you? I could be exploring the town and checking the stalls and stuff! See what people really think about their weird king and the weirdos here." the shark monster huffs.
Nine rolls his eyes "Because I am in the castle now. Which means I can finally find Ten and talk some sense into him."
Ranha stares shocked before she smiles broadly "Nine you are a genius! Lets go!"
Nine grins as he waves Ranha to follow him.
It isn't the first time he is in this castle. It is the fourth now. Each time Nine would just watch and wait only to not see Ten. This time he is going to search himself. Nine is lucky that Nightmare is a brat and clearly inexperienced with getting allies as it is taking his king and the brat king ages to get a treaty finalised. Honestly how Orchard managed to get Sanctuary as ally is still a mystery but Nine doesn't have time to figure out how this fake king is managing.
If Nine knows one thing is that kings like that will always fall by the brave people who are willing to stand against them.
But that isn't Nine's job. He already made the wrong choice like this before. When he picked the coup over his brother. When he didn't bother to help his brother adjust to all the heavy changes.
Nine had needed time. Time to even believe there were other options. To see that these options weren't wrong and could work for him. His friends had helped him see this. Yet Nine hadn't permitted Ten these insights and moments.
This time though! This time he will make this work! Even if Nine knows that Ten will never be able to fully adjust and become like them. He has gone through too much conditioning to ever be his own person again. But Nine can lead him in the right direction at least.
Ranha knows the way and it seems that she has the same plan as Nine had. Which is going straight towards the private wing.
None of them had allowed access to a whole wing of the castle. Apparently that was the royal's private wing. Which who needs a whole wing to themselves?!
Selfish pricks. All of them.
They turn the corner and get out into the hall. Nine ignores the many many tapestries. Ranha is right behind him as they make their way all the way through the next hall with large windows. They finally reach the right hallway and slow their running. They walk side by side with confidence as the near the entrance. There are two guards there but that doesn't matter. Nine is a visiting guard from a country their stupid king wants a treaty with. It will be easy to gain access.
Nine is a step away from entering the royal wing. He can't help but look at the arch leading into the next wing. The arch is large and high and seems to almost be like tree roots or branches. With small leaves and everything. It looks so livelike and Nine wonders who carved it, it straight up looks like living tree branches. Many other decorations and details just like this one are all across and around this castle.
He can't wonder much longer as the two guards cross their spears in front of Ranha and him.
Ranha glares "What are you doing? Let us through!"
A cat like monster, orange of colour, sounds very unamused "No one is allowed access into the king's wing." She looks unbothered.
The dog monster next to her grins "What Harper said. Shoo little kiddos." the grin makes the slight greying around his snout stand out. He has short trimmed fur and most obviously, the cut tail.
Nine huffs as he stands taller, easily towering over the black and white dog "I was allowed access."
The dog hums and taps his chin before shaking his head "Nope! Doesn't work like that!"
Harper nods "Indeed. Only the royal family and those allowed acces by either them of the Head of House are allowed entrance."
Nine wants to roll his eyes at the stupid head of house title. Everyone should know that is just some stupid coverup. Nine has his theories but for now he sees his in. He gives a charming smile as he nods "I know of course. But he told me himself he needed me to grab something for him." he grins as he wiggles his eye brows. Hinting at a secret meaning.
The dog and cat share a look before Harper looks unimpressed "We do not allow entrance to anyone unless he told us himself he allows entrance."
Ranha luckily sees what Nine is trying and joins in "We seriously got the go ahead! It is an emergancy that we are allowed in."
The dog shakes his head again "No can't do! The last time I didn't follow the orders they cut off my tail! And I only have one of those and I don't want to imagine what will go next."
Nine feels sick to deep in his soul. They... They did what?!
Harper glances at her partner unamused "Shut it Shep."
Shep grins at her "What do you think Harp! What will be next?"
Harper looks umimpressed "If I am lucky it will be your tongue."
Nine feels sick. What is wrong with these people? Why are they still here? What kind of hell and torture kingdom did his stupid younger brother get himself stuck in? Well not for long! Nine will make sure to tell the others everything.
But only after he managed to get Ten home. To get Ten away from this place before they realised that Nine was going to bring this whole kingdom down. He won't make the same mistake of ignoring his brother just because it would be harder for him. No. He will first free his brother and then they will bring this hellhole down and people will be celebrating them.
Harper looks unamused at them "You are not welcome here. Please remove yourself from this area or we will be forced to remove you ourselves." She sounds bored as she says this.
Nine is very sure he can take them but Ranha huffs and walks away. Nine looks back betrayed before following her.
They walk through the halls until they end up in the tapastry hall again. Nine glares at Ranha "Why would you-"
Ranha stops as she shakes her head "You don't understand. You know how I sometimes have these feelings? Of incoming attacks?" Nine nods. It was one of Ranha's many talents and how Ranha was undefeated.
Ranha continues to speak "When you got ready to get us inside. I felt it. This large... presence. Suddenly and ready." she shakes her head "Danger. I felt it was better to retreat and make a better plan."
Nine frowns but sighs "Fair enough. The chance that Ten would be there is rather small..." He may be one of his knights but Nine doubts they truly get anything aside from a title and more dangerous jobs. Well and the masks, those are rather cool. Nine would like a mask. He thinks he would look amazing and very cool in one.
Ranha nods as she mutters "Where could he be... or who would know?" She rubs her chin "The knights probably. But i doubt they will want to help us. I have no doubt that whatever the king used to keep Ten listening to him also works on the other knights. Do you think it is somekind of mind control? or like blackmail? mind control would be okay to break but blackmail is much more sensitive, especially as it implies he got it somehow. We could also wait until the treaty is signed and go by Sanctuary and see if we can get more support through them. Make an allyship with them and then overthrow this whole country."
Nine should be listening. But all he can do is stare at the tapastries.
They happened to end before a set that Nine had been ignoring. Almost like the world itself is trying to force Nine to see and consider them. The first in the set that calls his attention is one showing two small skeletons. One in yellow and one in purple. A sun shown above the one in yellow and a moon shown above the one in purple.
It isn't hard to connect the purple skeleton with the brat king. But Nine doens't understand. Because the yellow one is clearly the crown prince. But they look the same age here. Same height and everything. It had already been confusing that the younger brother had gotten the crown before the older one but this made it seem as if they are much closer in age than the real them shows. It confuses him. It could be something to play up the dramatics but when they had their tour it was implied that these tapastries are a way to document the past.
Though the actual historic events could have gone down differently and this is just another piece of propaganda.
The next one shows a picture of a dark and seemingly partly liquid monster. A skeleton still but large and dark and with tentacles on his back. He stands tall with an arm pointed outwards, the young yellow skeleton is being send away. As the tall one remains with a crown on his dark skull.
Nine looks at the third that caught his attention. This one shows the dark skeleton standing behind the young king. The dark goop skeleton however doens't look menacing. Instead the sockets are closed as the large imposing figure stands with open hands towards the young skeleton in purple. The young skeleton has his sockets open and seems to stare outwards. The tentacles all hang around him as well, not ready to strike but in a way that seemed to surrender. a crown held within the young skeleton's hands.
Nine ponders. He wonders if the gooped skeleton had been Nightmare's parent. He knows that Nim was suposed to be the king before Nightmare and that the gooped skeleton took over. Something about taking the crown from the rightful heir. Nine knows that the gooped skeleton had been named Nightmare as well and Nine is very sure that this one just named the now ruling Nightmae after himself, like a Nightmare the second. This also ties in with the whole head of house theory he has. Nine knows that the head of house is a useless title often given to a favourite servant. Somekind of excuse to keep someone close without needing to put actual time and effort into them standing out as consort or advisor. And the tiny skeleton had to have come from somewhere.
Of course his theory still has holes in it. Mostly what the deal with Dream is and where he fit in. But Nine hopes to eventually figure it out. He already figured out a lot of the situation after all.
He looks at the last one and huffs. It shows the young skeleton in purple holding hands wiht an older looking skeleton in yellow. The moon and sun having been united into one symbol. On the moon side were figures which resembled the different knights. Nine can't help but stare at the one with the snow leopard mask. His brother... stuck in some legacy and played like a pawn... If Nine had tried harder to make Ten feel included would Ten have been okay? Not perfect but maybe a bit better?
On the skeleton in yellow's side was some warrior in blue with a large hammer and a skeleton with many colours and brown clothes with a tail.
Nine stares at the title 'Reunited.' Seems like all these pictures have names. Nine doesn't understand but figures it is some sort of propaganda. Something to mellow out people and make it seem like it is okay.
"Nine?"
Ranha looks worried before she looks at where Nine is staring and her smile turns gentle "Hey... I know you want to help him. And even if we can never truly make him fully whole. We can at least give him a safe place."
Nine sighs and nods "It is something." The damage that his father and old king did was too large. There is no way his simple and naive brother will be able to fully get over it. To be able to move past it. But Nine will do his duty as brother and keep Ten somewhere safe. Some simple jobs will be good. Some normal routine.
Ranha looks around and sees some maids walk by and Nine follows her as she rushes over. She smiles brightly at them before making some small talk. The maids seem happy and content. Easily talking back and giggling once or twice. Though Nine can't help but feel like this is not the way girls normlaly giggle when Ranha flirts with them. This seems more... amused? It is hard to explain. He notices a black cat on the window sill. Lounging as it stares at them with large yellow eyes.
Ranha is casual as can be once she asks the question "I was wondering if we could see a knight! You know. Maybe the one with the white panther mask?"
The maids share a look before one snorts "You mean Cross?" Nine just barely manages to keep his annoyance is. His brother's name is not fucking cross. It is Ten! That is his name and Ten will always be Ten! The maid hums and looks at her friend "Is it training time?"
The other shakes her head "I don't think so. I believe I saw sir Cross with sir Dust."
The first one laughs and nods "Oh that is easy then." she smiles brightly at them "They will be at the ranch. That is where Sir Dust always is."
Nine blinks confused. The ranch? Why? Ranha however asks where they can find it and the maids tell them how to get there. They do warn them to not bother this Dust knight when he is working with the horses before walking off together. Giggling and whispering stuff. They shoot them a look before rushing off giggling again.
Ranha grins and flexes her arms "Still got it." Nine isn't sure she does but he won't challange her on it. They follow the hallways and Nine can't help but stare at the walls around them.
The walls look strange. They have ridges and dips and when Nine feels them they feel like they are made of wood yet he knows for a fact that they are suposed to be rocks and bricks.
Nine once again wonders which masterful crafter and builder made this castle. It almost seems alive. It is warm and beautiful. Everywhere there is signatures of nature or references to it.
The castle he is used to. That of his father. It was all sharp lines and precision. Nothing was allowed to be out of place. No dust or dirt anywhere. Everything had to be perfect.
This castle was wilder. That is the best way Nine can explain it. It is wild and uncontained. It branches outwards. Stuff is uneven and different. The pillars aren't exactly the same even as they are all that same carved stone to look like roots. It feels alive. It feels living. It seems the breath. It feels like there is something larger at play.
Yet it doesnt feel welcome, he doens't feel welcome. Nine can't explain it exactly.
They get outside and follow the path. It takes them a while as they walk past some trees and through a small forest and then they see it.
It is a large ranch. Build with this deep greenish wood of all colours. WIth multiple large pens nearby. It is open and large. But the trees give it privacy. It is beautiful.
Nine feels Ranha tug on his armour and follows where she is pointing. In a pen he can see his brother! Ten is there but... he is seated on a beige horse. Large and strong looking. Antoher skeleton is nearby and seems to be messing with the reins of the horse.
Nine begins to walk closer but he starts to slow his steps. Because... Ten isn't wearing armour. Nine can't rememebr the last time Ten hadn't been wearing armour. Back at home he always had to be ready. Ten.... Ten didn't have time to relax in a casual outfit. Or do things for himself. And yet... here he is... under another tyrant yet... he is wearing casual clothes? He is sitting on a horse? is this somekind of trick of that king? Let Ten relax to make him more loyal? Maybe the brat is smarter than Nine thought.
Ranha shoots him a confused look before going to step closer to the pen but Nine stops her. He can't explain. it is just... Ten looks... He looks different. Not just his clothes but... something else. Nine can't quite explain what it is or put his finger on it. He needs more information. He needs to be prepared to break through any trick or lie. He nods towards the side where a large fench is located and some barrels. Ranha nods and sneaks there with Nine right by her side. They hide behind the barrels and Nine focusses his magic. He quickly enhances his sight and hearing and focusses in. Strangely enough he also feels like there is rian in the air but a glance up shows a cloudless sky. But any thought about the weird feeling in the air is forgotten as soon as Ten speaks.
"Are you sure about this Dust? I still don't think I am ready. What if he throws me off?!"
The other skeleton, Dust is just wearing a large sweater. It looks to be made of high quality. He also seems to be wearing just a beanie to cover his skull. A large red scarf wrapped around his neck. The scarf looks a different quality than everything else.
The other tilts his skull at Ten. Seemingly considering his answer "If you fall off. We can try again."
Ten glares "Dust this isn't funny."
Dust seems to disagree as he grins slightly, just a slight upturn of the teeth "It is fine Cross. Just a matter of trying again. And you and Limestone need to practise this."
Nine feels himself get angry as they use the fake name for his brother but he needs to remain calm. He needs to watch and learn.
Ten grumbles unhappily as he glares down at the horse "I just... I don't get why you can't just train him... You trained Basalt... and Granite for that matter!"
Dust tilts his skull "I did. But he needs to get used to you while running. Get used to how you move and your weight." he pets the horse, the horse leans into Dust's touch "There needs to be trust Cross. You need to trust Limestone that he won't throw you off. And Limestone needs to be able to trust you that you will lead him into the right direction."
Ten blinks and seems to stare at Dust for a moment before looking down at the horse. The animal just stares at him. "I... euh... oh..."
Dust tilts his skull the other way "Do you want to try galloping first?"
Ten looks up and Nine finally figured out what is different. Why Ten looks different. Ten is... smiling. He is smiling brightly and nods excited at the idea.
Nine... Nine can't remember the last time he saw Ten happy and smiling... It is a face he never saw on his brother.
Ranha mutters softly "Wow... I never... He looks so differnet now... so much... more like... A person? i guess? It is weird. I am used to him just. Standing straight and like saluting and being still and unmoving? Like some statue and not like a person?"
Nine nods because he notices it now. The way the Ten is messing with the reins. The way his leg seems to tap the stirrup. The way he seems to almost... wiggle in place a little.
Dust chuckles and nods as he pets the horse a few more times "Go for it. Limestone wants to move." and he takes a few steps back.
Ten gets a large smile on his face as he kicks his heels lightly back, Nine is very surprised when the horse starts moving. He thought you had to be rougher and kick harder to get horses to move. That was hardly a tick.
Yet it works. As Ten starts to ride the horse and the horse speeds up quickly. Very quickly. Ranha suddenly gasps "Holy shit. That horse still has like the three toe system."
Nine blinks in shock. He knows that the wild horses form Orchard were rumoured to be faster and much more diverse than the horses in other places. The wild horses continued to adapt and where made to travel long distances for faster speeds unlike the normal horse endurance. The toes give extra stability and would make the horses able to travel all kinds of terrain while still being fast.
Nine stares in awe as the horse speeds up and than continues to go full speed ahead. Ten tugs lightly on the reins and the horse reacts instantly. Making sharp turns and Nine notices that the back looks longer and sligthly bigger than the horses Nine is used to.
These. These truly are a different breed.
Maybe Nine can convince his king and friend to keep this allyship going for a bit longer. Or maybe get a few horses out of the deal. Nine has no doubt these horses could be much better with good riders.
Ten is.... surprisingly okay with riding the horse. Makes okay turns but well. It is just Ten so NIne is sure he is doing stuff wrong that they can work on back in Ritten, once they find his shortcomings.
Ten eventually returns to Dust and Ten smiles brightly and Nine can't help but stare. He looks happy. He is happy. That is what is different about him. He is relaxed and happy and he doesn't stand as a statue anymore.
Ten laughs as he grins at Dust "Limestone is even faster than before!"
Dust nods but has a tiny smile on his face. Looking very content and proud "Limestone is a strong horse. He is fast and loves to exercise and run. It is honestly a bigger problem to make sure he rests than anything." he crosses his arms and raises a brow at Ten "Remind you of someone."
Ten blushes and looks to the side as he rubs his neck "I have been getting better with the whole work life balance."
Dust nods and agress easily. He pets the horse and looks at Ten "Want to try going faster?"
Faster?! How do you go faster than that!?
Ten looks deeply unhappy and unsure "I don't know..." he pets the horse.
Dust seems to stare at him before speaking "Would it be better if I lead the path with Pearl?"
Ten looks up and a look of pure relieve on his face. Had... had Ten always been this expressive?
Ten nods "Please."
Dust nods and looks to the side. He clicks his tongue and teeth and one of the horses looks up. A smaller but beautiful grey horse with striking purple eyes. The horse starts running and jumps over the fench before trotting over to the two skeletons and horse.
Ten laughs and grins at Dust "Pearl is showing off again."
Dust sighs and nods "I can't manage to unlearn her to jump fenches." the horse stops before him and pushes her whole head into his chest and arms. Dust pets the head and neck "You ready to lead Cross and Limestone?" The horse pulls back and tussles her head around before waiting patiently.
Dust puts his hand into his hip bag and pulls out this curious stone and metal item. He taps the side and bright gemstones light up and runes start to shine.
Ten looks alarmed "What is that!?"
Dust glances at him and a small smile appears "It is a prototype. Geno gave it to me to test it as I ride horses. It is suposed to be something to make it easy and quick to saddle up horses."
Ten looks deeply unhappy as he glares at the item as if it personally offended him "That stupid smug bastard. He is just trying to buy you over with stupid gifts."
Dust looks deeply amused "It is a prototype."
Ten throws up his arms "You are the only person who would find a good use for this!"
Dust chuckels as he lets the item get near the horse and it shines before it starts unfolding and a few clicks later and the horse is equipped with the normal rider things. Dust gets on top of the horse with a grace and confidence that leaves Nine open mouthed. He never... Even the people at home...
Dust looks at Ten "Ready?"
Ten grins as he nods "Yes. Lock the reins and just hold on right?" as he says it he messes with the headpiece on the horse and Nine wants to roll his eyes.
Dust nods and speaks "Indeed. Just make sure it is ready as if you are going to make a get away." and he waits.
Shit he really is patient... Is that why he is teaching Ten?
Ten nods and sits up straight "Ready!"
Dust chuckles as he turns his horse. He checks back over his shoulder to Ten "Go for it. Get him to follow Pearl." Dust doesn't even tug on the reins and Nine can't even spot an obvious movement to direct the horse to start moving. How did he do that?
Ten takes a deep breath before he leans closer to the horse and grabs hold on some extra handbars on the headpiece of the horse. The horse immediantly looks around as Ten nudges the horse to look at Dust and the leaving horse.
The horse stares before it starts to trod after the other skeleton and horse. Ten meanwhile stays as he is. Relaxing against the horse as his horse just follows Dust and his own horse.
It is fascinating. Especially when Dust starts to speed up with some unseeable comment and Ten's horse follows right along. There is no doubt. There is full commitment of both horses.
While Nine had no doubt that Ten still has much to improve with horse riding. Dust seems to be a master. He directs the horse with minimal movement and the horse seems to react immediantly to any unheard and unseen comment.
Soon both horses are running through the pen but it still isn't the gallop speed of before. Dust speaks up casually "We are going to practise you trusting Limestone. Just get into the position to blind ride. We are going to have Limestone follow Pearl's lead."
Ten nods "Okay. Okay. I can... I can do that." He lays fully against the horse and pulls his feet out of the saddle footholds. He messes with the saddle and the footholds get a lot higher and further towards the back. Cross does some weird combination of laying and crouching on the horse as he tugs his feet back into the holsters.
Dust looks back over his shoulder. Not at all seeming concerned about having to look where he is going as he blindly tugs at the right moment to make his horse make a turn "Not quite there but this is fine to practise with for now." he pets the horse's neck before leaning closer to the horse and the horse shoots of.
It goes faster than any horse Nine has ever seen before. It is fast and nimble as Dust truly rides the horse. The other horse with Ten blindly following-
Blind Riding. They don't mean it with looking. They mean it as they don't control the horses beyond the minimum. They are minimising the pressure and bother they could give the horses which enables those to run faster than before.
And if this is just the start... How fast can they go?
Ranha watches with her own mouth open before she mutters "This... this must be why he is a Knight. Not fighting or anything like that. He has a way with the horses."
Nine agrees and thinks she is right. The guy on the horse is fragile and delicate looking. Nine has no doubt that he towers over the other. Soft spoken too... But if he is this good with the horses. If he is able to train the wild horses and make them do this kind of stuff? no wonder they immediantly snatched him up and gave him the higest position they could. Make him stay.
The two horses are almost flying around the running pen. Then Dust leads his horse towards the middle where a small pond is located. Then Dust nudges the horse and it just jumps over the pond! It lands easily and keeps running. The horse with Ten doesn't pause a single step and copies the first horse. It lands safely and without a single issue.
Dust holds up an arm and fist and the horse with Ten starts to slow down and continues walking another round before stopping. Dust lets his horse walk by before just jumping off before nudging his horse. It huffs before continuing its trot across the ring.
Ten pants as he grins widely at Dsut "That was awesome!"
Dust chuckles "It is rather fun to just let the horses do their thing isn't it? and you made the jump first try. Killer fell at least twice."
Ten blinks as he looks up shocked "Twice?"
Dust nods "At least. I am pretty sure he snuck off to practise with Granite while I had my private training." he is by Ten's side as he checks the horse "How are you feeling? You were rather tense."
Ten laughs as he rubs his neck "I am fine... thanks for checking... It is just. I think I am done for today. Thanks again for... being here i guess."
Dust pauses his movements as he starts to undo the horse harnass "It is no problem. I am always here." and he clips it fully off.
Nine has made the decision that he likes this knight. The one he met first, the one wiht goop? The one that claimed Ten as his brother? Nine doens't like him. Weirdo with always having tear trails on his face. Not to forget how cocky and confident he acts. Must be some kind of trick and lie that he keeps up to fool and intimidate others. But Nine isn't fooled. He can see through that easily.
He also doesn't like the bigger guy. Dude moves too quietly for someone his size and that hole in his skull? You don't just get that on accident. Something sinister is in that one's past no doubt.
This one? Just a guy trying to train horses and help Ten with his horse and training? Nine can appreciate that. And sure! The fact he looks cute and pretty helps a lot too. Nine would in theory be fine with this guy joining them in Ritten as well. It would be nice for Ten to have someone who is already his friend. Help him feel at home even more. And then Nine can work on impressing the other by showing his skills! It would be quick and easy!
Ten is by Dust's side as they mess with the saddle and headpiece. They talk about settings and prefered length. Nine is honestly not sure what any of it means so Ten probably doesn't either.
Ten looks at Dust and looks down a bit embarrassed "I... I know I am asking a lot... But i don't really feel like going inside already... Mind showing some tricks? again?" and he looks hopeful.
Dust looks at him and nods "I don't mind."
Fuck he is so patient with Ten... Maybe this guy was a good influence on Ten. Helped him with his lessons and training. someone had to be as Nine doubts the king or those other two knights were.
Ten looks downright excited as he waits by the fench as Dust leads the horse towards the other pen where the beige horse joins the other horses. Nine can count at least ten in there, a whole herd of horses all slightly different shaped and colours. All looking healthy and strong and interacting.
Dust returns and gets on top of his grey horse with practised ease. Ten leans against the fench as he watches.
Dust turns his horse around and starts galloping through the area. Even faster than when he had been leading Ten on the other horse. Ten cheers as he grins widely. It looks so... unlike the brother Nine is used to... So very different.
Dust meanwhile makes the horse take a large turn and Ten grins as he looks around before grabbing a cap and throwing it into the pen. Dust aims the horse and straight up leans sideways and off the back of the horse. Almost fully upsidedown to easily snatch the cap of the ground before pulling himself back on the horse's back. Not once slowing down.
Ranha gasps "Hole shit that is so difficult... How?! Without slowing down!?" She is sitting up straighter to enable her to see everything easier. Pure awe on her face and Nine feels like he may have been not fully aware of how difficult that seemingly easy trick is...
Dust runs with the horse by Ten and straight up puts the cap on his skull. Again without once slowing down. Ten laughs and cheers "Go Dust go!" as he grins.
Dust keeps moving the horse around quickly and now he has started to zigzag with it! Nine blinks and looks at Ranha "Isn't that like... suposedly very hard for horses?"
Ranha nods as she doesn't look away from the display "It is insane! Horsese make large turns because of their back. I don't know how that horse is that flexible or how that guy can just direct the horse to make the turns by not actively turning but instead almost twisting in a jump?!" she stares "Is this what the rare horses can do? That inhabit this land? We need to get Regius to get some horses!"
Nine glares at his best friend "Don't speak the king's name so casually."
Ranha waves him off "It is fine. We were all friends before he became king so we are good."
Nine huffs as he focusses on the display of masterful horse riding. It is just that not speaking the title is disrespectful and he will not make them seem unprofessional or like they don't take their ruling class seriously. Regius only became king after the fall of the old one and Nine doesn't want people to think he is an easy target just because of that. And he doubts a brat like this country's king can see how much work they had to put into bettering what they had and helping their land and people heal from all the damage.
Ranha makes a curious noise close to choking and Nine pays attention just to see Dust standing on the back of the horse. Perfectly balanced and even balancing on one leg as the horse keeps running around the pen. He steps off the horse on a fench where he runs alongside the horse, the horse finally slowing a bit down, before Dust steps back on the back and the horse speeds up again.
Dust crouches down as he puts his hands on the horse's back before just making a handstand!
Nine can't imagine how hard standing on a horse could be. much less making a handstand?! He knows how to make a handstand of course and it is easier to do it with momentum. Dust did it without that.
Ten keeps cheering for his friend as Nine stares in awe. Ranha is muttering about how insane this is and how there has to be magic at play. Yet aside from the presure of the rain he has felt since the start he hasn't noticed any spells of any type. Not even to help lead or control the horses like other riders do. Nine can't help but just keep staring.
Dust sits back on the horse but backwards as he calmly undoes the saddle. The saddle falls off the horse and as soon as the saddle hits the ground it seems to disappear. Right, the saddle was part of that magic item Dust is testing. All while Dust remains seated on the powerful beast that is still running. Dust turns back around and messes with the reins that seem to make handholds on the headpiece.
Dust next grabs hold of the handholds and lays his legs on the back of the horse. He taps the side of the neck of the horse nad motions forwards before he lays fully against the horse.
The horse going fast before is nothing compared to how fast it runs now. It is bolting through the pen and there seems to be zero control that Dust has over it. Instead Dust just holds on and lets it do its things.
"He minimised his contact and hold on the horse. he freed the horse from the saddle to enable it to move even more freely and go faster!" Ranha looks downright excited as she just stands there and stares. Nine glares at her and pulls her back down to hide wiht him.
"Stop standing! They may see you!" Nine feels an anxiety at being caught snooping now. Not like before where he would just lie and say he wasn't snooping or spying. Now he is nervous about how it would reflect on him as a person, especially to the smaller and skilled skeleton. Fuck he wishes he was wearing his better armour than this one. He hadn't wanted to seem like he was trying to impress Orchard's ruler or make it seem like they thought they needed to impress this leader but he is regretting it now. How can he show him his best side when he isn't prepared!?
The horse continues to run before coming to a slow stop near Ten. Ten is grinning widely as he claps his hands "That was so cool! Dust it is nuts how fast you can go with Pearl!"
Dust shrugs as he gets off and grabs a brush to start taking care of the animal while Ten stands near his side. "I was wondering soemthing." Dust voice is soft and calm. Even.
Ten nods as he watches Dust work "Ask away."
Dsut shoots him a look before speaking again "I figured you would want to be near Nightmare with the guests here. Why with me?"
Ten goes quiet as he looks down. Nine nudges Ranha and nods. It is their time to act! This is the perfect set up-
A hand grabs him by the neck and pushes him flush against the barrels he had been hiding behind. Ranha makes a shocked sound and Nine can barely see her in the same position as he is in.
A deep voice speaks up "Dont you know that eavesdropping is rude? But what could be expect from snooping immature children."
Nine freezes. That is the voice of the big knight guy. The one wiht the lion mask. Horror. how... when? Nine hadn't even heard him! When did they get exposed and found out!?
Horror continues to speak "But if you wish to listen in. You will listen. You will hear what Cross has to say instead of speaking for him."
Ranha growls "His name isn't-UGH!" she chokes for a moment before the kngiht releases his grip a bit again.
"Listen."
Ten finally answers "It is dumb..."
Dust hums as he leans against the horse "Try me."
Ten isn't looking up as he rubs his own arm "I... I didn't expect them to be happy with me... That is fair. I just. Didn't expect them to hate me without knowing me." Ten frowns as he softly pets the horse "It is like... They are unhappy with who i am now and want me to be who i used to be, who i don't want to be anymore. Yet they hate that person." Ten hunkers in on himself "I don't... like feeling like that."
Dust frowns as he puts a hand on Ten's shoulder "That is on them."
Ten frowns as he looks away "It isn't... I" He frowns as he moves his hands around. Had... Had Ten always moved this much? That can't be right. Nine remembers him being still and unmoving. Their father had always been strict about staying in line and acting as they had to and-
and...
and being... the way he wanted... to be...
Like Nine wants Ten to be.
Oh...
Ten isn't the problem... is he?
Dust takes Ten's face between his hands and makes Nine's younger brother look at him "Cross. Look at me. No i mean it. Look at me." Ten stares at him and Dust looks at him "You are you. No one else. No one telling you how you should be or act is right. You are fine like this. You are happy like this. You can be however you want to be, whatever makes you feel good and feel like you are you." Dust gentle bonks their skulls together "I think you would do best if you visit Lust for a bit and you two hang out and focus on something else. Okay?"
Ten frowns but gives a slow nod "Okay."
Dust nods as he keeps holding the taller skeleton "And this is not me sending you away. I enjoy us spending time together. But i think being here while they are here is stressing you out. Making you second guess yourself. Go to a different environment and let yourself relax. When you come home we can try more horse riding or you can help Killer trying to get Kingdom Devourer out of a tree again. Go relax."
Ten frowns before nodding and just hugging the other. Dust chuckles and pats his back "You are fine the way you are Cross... In matter of fact. You are perfect the way you are." Ten's breath seems to hitch as he just holds the other tighter and continues to hold him. It isn't until some time passed that Ten lets go and steps back with an embarrassed expression and... and slightly hazy looking eyes.
"Sorry... I know you don't... don't like... I am sorry."
Dust chuckles and pats his back "It is alright. Go hang out with your boyfriend while I clean up."
Boyfriend... but... why would he... who would even want to date Ten? He doens't even have a personality and is just a tool and an idiot-
Except everything he has seen now shows otherwise and... Why does Nine expect Ten to be the same way that their father wanted them to be?
Ten walks away with a wave and goes straight towards the castle. Looking a bit better as he is smiling and seems to have a small bounce in each step.
Dust watches him go before he just walks straight towards their hiding place oh shit when did-
Dust stops before them and looks unamused. His gaze cold and seemingly able to look straight into his soul. Nine would have been frozen even without the hand holding his neck.
Dust looks at Horror "Good catch H. Trouble?"
Horror hums "They tried to get into our king's wing. I was ready to give backup."
Nine feels himself grow cold. They had been followed? The whole time? They had been watched the whole time and they hadn't even noticed!
Nine... Nine may have been wrong about how capable these guys are...
Dust hums "Lets put them in the jail cell as time out. Children should know not to wander after all."
Nine feels humiliated as he and Ranha are dragged towards the castle. Dust walks behind them as Horror leads the way, Horror does not let them walk.
They walk by some servants and Nine sees it are the same maids that they met in the hallway. The maids giggle and nod respectfully to both Horror and Dust and greet them with "Hello my Knights." before they shoot a glance at Ranha and Nine before gigglign together.
They are dropped off in a cell each and the door is locked. Nine goes to check the lock only to realise there is magic woven into the very bars and walls. These locks aren't just physical but also magical. He can't break them out.
Horror hums "There. Children have their time out." he looks highly amused as he nods to Dust "Mind taking over watch?"
Dsut shrugs as he walks towards the exit "I will take your shift. you make sure the children behave." and he leaves.
horror looks at them amused and Nine feels terrible...
Not just the fact he looked like an idiot to the pretty and skilled skeleton. But he also made a fool out of himself to be caught snooping and trying to get into places he isn't allowed to be.
He sits on the bed and can't help but look at his own hands.
Does... does Ten really not want to come home? How can Nine get him to come along? Will he be forced to drag his brother home.
Nine pauses at the thought and feels a new horrifying feeling overtake himself.
When did he become so much like his father?
#also. Someone: why do you keep Shep on board!! He lies and always lies!#nightmare: ... because he is actually very trustworthy? He may lie but you know he lies? and he does his job well? seems fine to me.#Killer: until he lies to the wrong person again and we get another cross situation.#nightmare: it is fine! I am sure everythign is fine.#Shep knows 100% what he is doing. He is being a menace on purpose and honestly everyone likes it.#Ranha trying to impress the maids. the maids “This wannebe is weird but sure. lets play along. we are bored.”#the maids “Dust is gonna make them regret living if they intrude on horse bonding time and we love the drama so lets send them that way"#because the maids servants and guards aren't stupid. they know what is up.#Also yes. Dust's brother Phantom gave Dust the red scarf. as birthday present as soon as they reunited. It was very sweet.#Nightmare has a purple one. Phantom had grinned and as Nightmare is dust's brother that makes phantom brother-adjacent.#also nine: I vibe checked them all and i figured them all out no issue.#Every assumption he makes is wrong. by a lot.#Okay hahaha but yes! I think this one turned out very nice! Not a whole lot to add as commentary hihihi.#Hope you enjoy Spot!#Oh wait on that note!!!#Dust is training the horses to be faster and run away after the mountain.#He wants the horses to be better prepared for that situation so he is hard at work to enable them to be faster and to run to safety as the#rider just holds on.#Okay now i am done lmao
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It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry
( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)
(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)
#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him#I always knew he was a parental figure for me#but now I connected the dots#How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life#that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so#and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life#ofc ud become attached#i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him#he occupies most of my thoughts honestly#But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life#i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an#bloom and be free#and that's what ill try to do#but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness#its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired#somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea#how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi#g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if#lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways#sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay#yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le#go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk#how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate#my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t#me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol#so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest#y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t#ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti#ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd
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And I'm still full of the love you want
#edit: it showed up for a minute and then disappeared again in the tag... yey.....#sooo i kinda got lost in it and finished it yesterday#have some P A I N in the morning#sleep token#sleep token fanart#this is the one that started out as a small offering but it really did not fit at all and then i got an other idea for that anyway#which is much better but you'll see sooner or later when i get to it#sooo i guess this is a new take on the love you want?#or something.. at least the lyrics make it extra painful#i'm also borrowing Misha's detail shot thing because it looked cool and i wanted to try it#Misha did it better no question but i gave it a go at least#annnnnyway#vessel#vessel fanart#vessel i#vessel sleep token#sleep token vessel#sleep token band#sleeptoken#levynn tries to draw
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why must everything that the text clearly states atp be misconstrued like i really dont get it he has plenty of flaws in that relationship but we, and cersei, know that he was ready to kill robert for just the disrespect of the cheating if cersei said the word. he doesnt concern himself with the personal consequences, he is reckless, detached from a lot of things, and can close his eyes at the future if he doesn’t want to acknowledge it. also the concern over the “shame” and ned type judgement feels so overestimated to me atp. he never regrets aerys, he is mad at how he is perceived (but again, notably doesnt try to rectify it by telling the truth for a lot of complex reasons), but he would never take it back. if he believes its the right thing to do, and is not overdosing on copium trying to juggle vows he cares about, he will do it, reputation be damned. though he has selfish concerns regarding being viewed as good, the internal matters so much more than the external: see weirwood dream: who actually shows up? what makes the fire go out? “it was not him. it was never him”, see the trebuchet fiasco, see the choice in adwd. why shouldnt we take cersei at face value when she implies that if jaime knew about the physical abuse he would have killed him? he loves and cares about cersei to an insane degree, even if he can be selfish toxic and unhealthy too. not to mention he would be glad to kill robert anyway lol. i really find it very very difficult to imagine that he wouldnt have killed him based on almost every single part of his characterization.
#ik its better to reply than to do this but i dont use my twitter for fandom and i keep seeing this general sentiment over and over again#like it makes him so inconsistent and nonsensical#i don’t understand this whole jaime was never there for cersei prehandloss he was at her disposal for almost everything he would have maime#a child just bc she asked like what???#u think that wouldnt have shamed him??#he gave up almost everything for her at 15#and im gonna be real if u r frustrated by jaime burning the letter being framed as this grand triumphant redemptive choice#by people#which i get i dont think its framed like that either#its just as unfair to treat it as the opposite#it is the end of a certain delusion#which is why the joanna dream is the focal point#and#he can divorce himself he has no obligation to die to try save her atp#and remain her sword#i dont see him as the literal devil for that sorry#i feel like some of u feel the need to misconstrue his character to make some of these choices out to be as bad as possible
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Can't believe this show just said that yeah these broken children that have finally managed to claw some semblance of family out of the train wreck their psychotic father made of them, these children now adults, don't get peace, they don't deserve it. actually the world is so much better without them in it. They are the direct reason why so many people they have met are not living happier lives and the universe would be a much happier safer place with them gone. They were pawns in their father's game and now they are victims of their "mother's" scheme. And this is all they get, there was never any happy ending for them in the cards the universe rebukes their very existence and it is constantly trying to write them out of it.
They doomed the world from the start, the blame is all at their feet and they must pay for the crime of being born "special".
The fucking implications of that my god!
That's the message you ended your show on. That is what you are leaving us with. Why?
#not even a group hug? really?!?!#what are the impilcations of this steven? what are they huh?#KC watches#the umbrella academy#the fact that the handler is alive well and thriving while the girl she abused for years had to die for it is so ughhhhhh. The implications#I still don't get what Reggie's wife was trying to prove shit wasnt going to happen to you purposely kick started it and for what?#to show reggie that you feel guilty for destroying your world by destroying another world?#would have been better if she was just a straight villian because what? what are you sincerely yapping about#God I didn't think this would make me so angry because honestly I'm all for the occasioanl tragic ending#the don't look ups where you gave it your best shot but it just didn't work out but that was handled so much fucking better than this#also the message in that movie is a fucking warning what are you trying to warn us about steve? Emotionally underdeveloped adults are bad?#God I'm not trying to accuse anyone on the show of some underlying ism#but come on not a single person was a little bit concered about the implications? the fucking implication my god#god I'm going to make a longer post about my general thoughts soon#tua season 4#tua#tua s4#tua spoilers#hargreeves siblings#ben hargreeves#five hargreeves#allison hargreeves#luther hargreeves#diego hargreeves#lila pitts#umbrella acedmy#hargreeves family
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All I recall with clarity are sunshine and his merry song, what are these thoughts so vague and dark beyond?
#been relistening to the mechanisms recently#and Loki has me by a chokehold once again#I have so many thoughts about her#this is sorta a redraw of a piece I made years ago#I couldn’t get it right and so I gave up on it#as soon as Loki (the song) played the mental image I’d been trying to make back then#slammed back into my skull#I like this piece so much more#of course I still have many complaints about it#but I’ve learned to live with those a lot better than I could of back then#my art#traditional art#water color#the mechanisms#loki tbi#loki#the bifrost incident
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also i posted on here at the beginning of the year about my 365 albums in 365 days and i think we all knew that was a little unrealistic just knowing who i am as a person so instead we are going to do three new albums a week (one of which will be a cast recording/musical theatre-adjacent album) for this year through the rest of next year anyways if anyone has album recs (esp. for underrated musicals....)
#post: personal#i did make it through a good chunk of albums though esp recommended ones by y'all#but then i got sick and then sick again and gave up </3#also trying to be better about watching movies and tv too... but i have a solid watch list for that hehe
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volo feeling genuine sympathy for others but feeling the need to deny it and bury it in layers of protective coping mechanisms is like my favorite flavor of characterization for him. on the outside he’s super nice! for about three layers underneath that he’s like hehe i’m so evil 😈 i’m playing this poor sucker for a fool 😈😈 business as usual. and then the final layer at his core is like man this poor kid needs help. man these people seem genuinely happy and close. i can barely comprehend that. wait oops i almost let myself feel an emotion uh back to the evil. his exterior veneer isn’t entirely a veneer- it’s see-through in a couple places. some of them show the evil beneath but some of them show the genuine human deep beneath
YEAH YEAH YEAHHH THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. its a special kind of tragic that volo could have the life he wants now because he's around people that aren't terrible, but he just cannot see that, or refuses to because he's scared of betrayal happening again. if he was just genuine in what he does instead of justifying it with using people before they use him, he'd be fine. but no, he's gotta self-sabotage himself at every turn
#clai speaks#asks#he's all ''i dont care!'' but since he's trying so hard to make this new world where everything will be kinder to him--#--doesn't that Mean he cares? he wants to be happy but he just can't see himself being happy in this situation#like compared to cyrus who kinda just. gave up and wants emotions gone entirely so he doesn't have to feel how he feels ever again#volo wants things to be better but there are easier ways to do it that he just REFUSES TO DO
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just played the latest honkai chapter and i gotta be honest... the last two chapters have been more interesting and well written than most of the part one story to me
#honkai impact#hi3#dreamseeker#senadina#helia erdos#coralie 6626 planck#both story and character wise#and this might be a controversial take#but helia might be a better written character than any of the part one characters#even coralie got more development in the short time she had than a lot of part one characters did#like that scene with her and einstein fighting after the dog died did so much for her character and ties into what happens later really wel#but people just ignored that sadly#and whatever is going on with dreamseeker and senadina is way more interesting to me than anything in part one was up until chapter 16#like i get that part 2 had a rough start#i was actually ready to hate it and quit playing for good#but i gave it a chance and im glad i did#and i love part one of course#kiana is one of my favorite characters of all time#so are mei and bronya#and their story will always be special to me#so im not trying to say part one was bad#but if part two continues with the same writing and story quality it has now it genuinely has a chance to be even better#and it makes me sad that its not as popular because a lot of people quit playing#or refuse to give it a chance and just breeze through it without engaging with the story at all
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