#and gave up trying to make it better
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saw some mangy dog on the outskirts of town
#my art#oc#els#werewolf#furry#anthro#illustration#you would not believe the hassle this gave me lmao....i want to do more with it but i have to wipe my hands of it#idk if this looks good but it has to be finished i have to be finished with it#WORD OF ADVICE that allows a small glimpse into the horrible time i've had: PLAN YOUR COMPOSITIONS#GOD. initial drawing of els: 1-2 hours at most. trying to find a composition that doesn't suck: 100000 hours and ongoing#i think my problem is this els looks better zoomed in but finding a way to keep it zoomed in....mission impossible#i love this els face though. i will admit. i had to persevere to get SOMETHING that at least vaguely worked so i could show off this els#okay. okay. anyway it's greengage season again. big ups to greengages for making life just that much brighter#also the owls are goin crazyyy outside my window rn they are speaking and i am listening. in a delirium
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Boo!!! get ghosted (lol)
#fnaf gregory#fnaf security breach#i dont even know why i made him all ghostly i just think it looked better???#anyways i just wanted to try actual colours againā¦ (<- only makes monochrome stuff)#also i think this looks very dreamlike lol at least to me it does#dont look at the water. just dont. i tried my best and gave upš©·
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i feel like im not making any sense but does anyone else feel like there are stories that let u run with them and ones that spell everything out for you
#im reading that post that says artists are directors of audience reaction and not its dictator:#'you cannot guarantee that everyone viewing your work will react as you are trying t make them react. a good artist knows that this is what#allows work to breath. by definition you cannot have art where the viewer brings nothing to the table ... this is why you have to let go of#the urge to plainly state in text exactly how you think the work should be interpreted ... its better to be misinterpreted sometimes than#to talk down to your audience. you wont even gain any control that way; people will still develop their opinions no matter what you do#im thinking abt this again cuz i was thinking maybe the thing that lets adventure time work so well the way it does is cuz it doesnt#take itself too seriously that it gives the audience enough room to fuck with subtext and then fuck with them back yknow. i think it was#mentioned somewhere that they werent even planning to run with the postapocalyptic elements that are hinted in the show but changed their#mind after the one off with the frozen businessmen and dominoed into marcy and simons backstory. on the other side there are stories that#explain too much to let the story speak for itself and i think it ends up having to do more with the crew trying to lead ppl in a certain#direction than expand on what they have and i see a lot of this with miraculous. like when interviews and tweets are used as word of god in#arguments and it becomes a little stifling to play around with it knowing the creator can just interject. u can say its the crews effort to#engage with its audience but it feels more like micromanaging. and none of this is to say there ISNT room for stories that spell things out#theyre just suited for different things. if sesame street tried abstract approaches to themes and nuance itd be counterproductive#a lot of things fly over my head so i need help picking things apart to get it- but it doesnt have to be from the story itself. ive picked#picked up or built on my own interpretations listening to other ppl share their thoughts which creates conversation around the same thing#sometimes stories will spell things out for you without being so obvious abt it that it feels like its woven into the text. my fav example#for this might be ATLA using younger characters as its main cast but instead of feeling like its dumbed down for kids to understand why war#is bad its framed from a childs point of view so younger audiences can pick up on it by relating to the characters. maybe an 8 year old#wont get how geopolitics works but at least they get 'hey the world is a little more complicated than everyone vs. fire nation'. same for#steven universe bc its like theyre trying to describe and put feelings into words that kids might not have so they have smth to start with#especially with the metaphors around relationships bc even if it looks unfamiliar as a kid now maybe the hope is for it to be smth you can#look back to. thats why it feels like these shows grew up with me.. instead of saving difficult topics for 'when im ready for it'#as if its preparing me for high school it gave me smth to turn in my hands and revisit again and again as i grow. stories that never#treated u as dumb all along. just someone who could learn and come back to it as many times as u need to. i loved SU for the longest time#but i felt guilty for enjoying it hearing the way ppl bash it. bc i was a kid and thought other ppl understood it better than me and made#feel bad for leaning into the message of paying forward kindness and not questioning why steven didnt punish the diamonds or hold them#accountable. but im rewatching it now and going oh. i still love this show and what it was trying to teach me#yapping#diary
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i canāt stop thinking about your waterbender!megumi au..,, like yes heās more specialized in healing but would not hesitate in using waterbending to protect you from whoever or whatever (even if he prob losesš) he might even learn bloodbending from the villageās hermit choso who knowsš¤·š½āāļø and lmao him just giving you a betrothal necklace without verbally proposing youā¦ i hate (love) this dork
even if he prob loses LOLL megumi is such a loser but itās okay he fights valiantly <33 but yeah, him spending all his time with his mom and all the elders in the village healing and homemaking and cooking because his style of water bending is so soothing and calm, and also heās a huge mamaās boy, and also because everyone likes to use his and tojiās strength to their advantage to get them to do the heavy lifting, but the second thereās a threat to you, he pulls out all the stops. suddenly heās a trained fighter and master waterbender oh heās so beloved to me <33
the necklace thing to me is like how katara was wearing her grandmotherās betrothal necklace without knowing it? he took a trip to the opposite pole where the tradition is engagement necklaces or bracelets or whatever significant piece of jewelry, and comes back with one for you and just. gives it to you, no explanation and then a day later someone else notices it and grins ear to ear congratulating you and megumi and youāre like ????? and itās not until his mom is like āoh he did it! tell me all about the proposal!ā and now megumi is dodging icicles youāre bending his way bc who proposes without proposing. but itād also be equally hilarious if he also didnāt know it was betrothal jewelry and was just trying to be romantic and now youāre engaged LOLL
#anonymous#itās technically self plagiarism if i say he gave you the necklace with the intention of marriage but didnāt tell you LMFAO#but i think itās equally megumi to just. try and be Stereotypically Romantic and end up accidentally proposing#also extra bonus if after all this toji was like well. if it makes it any better ur grandparents wanted to betrothe the two of you to#each other at birth bc of conflicts at the time anyway so congrats!#(toji is then splashed with water by his wife)#atla au#jjk x reader
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Re-design of my un-named Beetlejuice OC from back when I was thirteen
Original Reference under the cut:
#my art#beetlejuice#toonjuice#beetlejuice cartoon#beetlejuice fanart#beetlejuice movie#procreate#I donāt really make OCās for fanwork anymoreā¦ but the ones I had when I was younger almost never got named š„²#When I first made her I really really liked her- and her story was very self indulgent#Looking at it now is almost way too weird for meā¦ (and honestly a little unintentionally homophobic???)#Basically she was one of the girls from Danteās infernoā¦ except she got kicked out because she only had attraction to girls#(This was BEFORE I suspected that I was a lesbianā mind you.)#Yeah but anyway she went to the Deetz/Maitland house looking for a place to stay but drove everybody crazy#She was super flamboyant- loved everything pink n fluffy- and was well meaning but did more harm than good trying to do nice things for the#She had this one sided crush on Delia??? Like musical Beej and Adam except less perverted and more flirty/sappy? I was an odd kid- okay? š„²#Anywayā¦ the old design didnāt really do much to show off her personalityā¦ so I ended up upheaving the whole thing#It was okay for what I knew at the time- but I know what I was trying to say then and now I have the knowledge to say it better#Alsoā the reason I gave her horns here is so silly.#When I was younger I was in a Christian school where I wasnāt allowed to draw witches-ghosts-demons-etc.#So even though I based her on the Dante girlsā¦ I refused to give her horns because I thought that was ātoo sinfulā#I even remember having so much guilt while looking for references of the Dante workers#I couldnāt even look for more than five seconds!#Anywaysā¦ she really pushed the boundaries for me at the time and itās fun to see how Iāve changed and grown since then.
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just kill me
#this whole article is bad but this was the WORST#not even for the reason you think (819 reasons)#Eliza you've already heard this rant but#if I can be way too sincere and long-winded for a moment#'always if I ask him something he helps'#how many quotes do we have from teammates over the years saying that exact thing#michael latta saying 'it doesn't matter if you're a top pair dman or a 4th line peasant; he'll do anything to help you'#christian djoos saying 'he's always there for you no matter what time or place. if something's up he's always there'#HHA saying recently nicke gave him his number and told him 'if you need anything just call me and I can help you'#carly in that interview when this was announced saying how nicke has been the support for everyone in that locker room from himself and osh#to guys who haven't been there long like strome and even pacioretty#I know holts and batya and andre and rasmus and jojo and tj and tom and karl alzner have all said stuff like this too#and that's just who I can think of off the top of my head#like. that's it. that's nicke.#if you ask him something. he helps.#for such an amazing athlete. for such a crucial part of making hockey A Thing in DC.#what his teammates want to talk about is his kindness#and that speaks so highly of him and is so genuinely admirable to me and worth aspiring to#I don't want to put anyone on a pedestal because we don't know these guys#but like. in terms of impact. nicke really genuinely made me try to be a better more thoughtful more actively outreaching friend#because I saw the way his teammates talked about him and that's how I want to be thought of.#I want people to know I'll be there for them. & not that I haven't been willing to do that but I've been more active about offering it#and part of that genuinely is because of his example#there's a million other things about his kindness I could mention before I even get to his hockey but this has already gone on far too long#so anyway#he is so dear to me#I hope he is happy and healthy#and that he knows how loved he is#nicklas backstrom#hockey
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And I'm still full of the love you want
#edit: it showed up for a minute and then disappeared again in the tag... yey.....#sooo i kinda got lost in it and finished it yesterday#have some P A I N in the morning#sleep token#sleep token fanart#this is the one that started out as a small offering but it really did not fit at all and then i got an other idea for that anyway#which is much better but you'll see sooner or later when i get to it#sooo i guess this is a new take on the love you want?#or something.. at least the lyrics make it extra painful#i'm also borrowing Misha's detail shot thing because it looked cool and i wanted to try it#Misha did it better no question but i gave it a go at least#annnnnyway#vessel#vessel fanart#vessel i#vessel sleep token#sleep token vessel#sleep token band#sleeptoken#levynn tries to draw
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why must everything that the text clearly states atp be misconstrued like i really dont get it he has plenty of flaws in that relationship but we, and cersei, know that he was ready to kill robert for just the disrespect of the cheating if cersei said the word. he doesnt concern himself with the personal consequences, he is reckless, detached from a lot of things, and can close his eyes at the future if he doesnāt want to acknowledge it. also the concern over the āshameā and ned type judgement feels so overestimated to me atp. he never regrets aerys, he is mad at how he is perceived (but again, notably doesnt try to rectify it by telling the truth for a lot of complex reasons), but he would never take it back. if he believes its the right thing to do, and is not overdosing on copium trying to juggle vows he cares about, he will do it, reputation be damned. though he has selfish concerns regarding being viewed as good, the internal matters so much more than the external: see weirwood dream: who actually shows up? what makes the fire go out? āit was not him. it was never himā, see the trebuchet fiasco, see the choice in adwd. why shouldnt we take cersei at face value when she implies that if jaime knew about the physical abuse he would have killed him? he loves and cares about cersei to an insane degree, even if he can be selfish toxic and unhealthy too. not to mention he would be glad to kill robert anyway lol. i really find it very very difficult to imagine that he wouldnt have killed him based on almost every single part of his characterization.
#ik its better to reply than to do this but i dont use my twitter for fandom and i keep seeing this general sentiment over and over again#like it makes him so inconsistent and nonsensical#i donāt understand this whole jaime was never there for cersei prehandloss he was at her disposal for almost everything he would have maime#a child just bc she asked like what???#u think that wouldnt have shamed him??#he gave up almost everything for her at 15#and im gonna be real if u r frustrated by jaime burning the letter being framed as this grand triumphant redemptive choice#by people#which i get i dont think its framed like that either#its just as unfair to treat it as the opposite#it is the end of a certain delusion#which is why the joanna dream is the focal point#and#he can divorce himself he has no obligation to die to try save her atp#and remain her sword#i dont see him as the literal devil for that sorry#i feel like some of u feel the need to misconstrue his character to make some of these choices out to be as bad as possible
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It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry
( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)
(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)
#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him#I always knew he was a parental figure for me#but now I connected the dots#How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life#that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so#and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life#ofc ud become attached#i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him#he occupies most of my thoughts honestly#But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life#i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an#bloom and be free#and that's what ill try to do#but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness#its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired#somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea#how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi#g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if#lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways#sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay#yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le#go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk#how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate#my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t#me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol#so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest#y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t#ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti#ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd
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Can't believe this show just said that yeah these broken children that have finally managed to claw some semblance of family out of the train wreck their psychotic father made of them, these children now adults, don't get peace, they don't deserve it. actually the world is so much better without them in it. They are the direct reason why so many people they have met are not living happier lives and the universe would be a much happier safer place with them gone. They were pawns in their father's game and now they are victims of their "mother's" scheme. And this is all they get, there was never any happy ending for them in the cards the universe rebukes their very existence and it is constantly trying to write them out of it.
They doomed the world from the start, the blame is all at their feet and they must pay for the crime of being born "special".
The fucking implications of that my god!
That's the message you ended your show on. That is what you are leaving us with. Why?
#not even a group hug? really?!?!#what are the impilcations of this steven? what are they huh?#KC watches#the umbrella academy#the fact that the handler is alive well and thriving while the girl she abused for years had to die for it is so ughhhhhh. The implications#I still don't get what Reggie's wife was trying to prove shit wasnt going to happen to you purposely kick started it and for what?#to show reggie that you feel guilty for destroying your world by destroying another world?#would have been better if she was just a straight villian because what? what are you sincerely yapping about#God I didn't think this would make me so angry because honestly I'm all for the occasioanl tragic ending#the don't look ups where you gave it your best shot but it just didn't work out but that was handled so much fucking better than this#also the message in that movie is a fucking warning what are you trying to warn us about steve? Emotionally underdeveloped adults are bad?#God I'm not trying to accuse anyone on the show of some underlying ism#but come on not a single person was a little bit concered about the implications? the fucking implication my god#god I'm going to make a longer post about my general thoughts soon#tua season 4#tua#tua s4#tua spoilers#hargreeves siblings#ben hargreeves#five hargreeves#allison hargreeves#luther hargreeves#diego hargreeves#lila pitts#umbrella acedmy#hargreeves family
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All I recall with clarity are sunshine and his merry song, what are these thoughts so vague and dark beyond?
#been relistening to the mechanisms recently#and āLoki has me by a chokehold once again#I have so many thoughts about her#this is sorta a redraw of a piece I made years ago#I couldnāt get it right and so I gave up on it#as soon as Loki (the song) played the mental image Iād been trying to make back then#slammed back into my skull#I like this piece so much more#of course I still have many complaints about it#but Iāve learned to live with those a lot better than I could of back then#my art#traditional art#water color#the mechanisms#loki tbi#loki#the bifrost incident
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also i posted on here at the beginning of the year about my 365 albums in 365 days and i think we all knew that was a little unrealistic just knowing who i am as a person so instead we are going to do three new albums a week (one of which will be a cast recording/musical theatre-adjacent album) for this year through the rest of next year anyways if anyone has album recs (esp. for underrated musicals....)
#post: personal#i did make it through a good chunk of albums though esp recommended ones by y'all#but then i got sick and then sick again and gave up </3#also trying to be better about watching movies and tv too... but i have a solid watch list for that hehe
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volo feeling genuine sympathy for others but feeling the need to deny it and bury it in layers of protective coping mechanisms is like my favorite flavor of characterization for him. on the outside heās super nice! for about three layers underneath that heās like hehe iām so evil š iām playing this poor sucker for a fool šš business as usual. and then the final layer at his core is like man this poor kid needs help. man these people seem genuinely happy and close. i can barely comprehend that. wait oops i almost let myself feel an emotion uh back to the evil. his exterior veneer isnāt entirely a veneer- itās see-through in a couple places. some of them show the evil beneath but some of them show the genuine human deep beneath
YEAH YEAH YEAHHH THIS IS WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT. its a special kind of tragic that volo could have the life he wants now because he's around people that aren't terrible, but he just cannot see that, or refuses to because he's scared of betrayal happening again. if he was just genuine in what he does instead of justifying it with using people before they use him, he'd be fine. but no, he's gotta self-sabotage himself at every turn
#clai speaks#asks#he's all ''i dont care!'' but since he's trying so hard to make this new world where everything will be kinder to him--#--doesn't that Mean he cares? he wants to be happy but he just can't see himself being happy in this situation#like compared to cyrus who kinda just. gave up and wants emotions gone entirely so he doesn't have to feel how he feels ever again#volo wants things to be better but there are easier ways to do it that he just REFUSES TO DO
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Junelezen Day 18 - Evening
I suppose it was, thank for you showing me this Arsay
#junelezen 2024#ffxiv#nivienne grovant#screenshots#arsay nun#for the record I spent way too long trying to get up the tower for this and gave up#I made it to the second last screenshot#then fell off again#anyway I think arsay would be much better at getting up there than Nivinne#and true to life because I have not made it up there but Arsay has several times#UPDATE I DID MAKE IT UP THERE#technically it was weeks after I took these gposes but I DID IT
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ooh man you gotta do the Irish lads :]
those guys + emr,,, delirious š
#mono's art#bbs#i have not been drawing bbs tyat much#and barely checking tumblr#ive also been sort of struggling to draw terroriser/nogla too SOQP I TRIED LIKE AROUND THE TIME THIS ASK WAS SENT BUT GAVE UP IMMEDIATELY...#sorry ā¹ļø EUEJQJLP...#its like 4 in the morning so im gohng to bed#goodnight SORRY I DIDNT COLOR IT IN#i will try to make a better doodle... with color....... soon................. goobniht#banana bus squad#daithi de nogla#i forgot. is it terroriser? or terrorisor? help#h2o delirious
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Oh I do not like that two of my ships right now has someone that's deeply oppressed on a systematic level in their story having to set aside their own morals and values for their extremely privileged lover who does not bother to truly understand their pain, often trying to make excuses for the oppressors.
#jayjon#caitvi#LOOK IT'S DEEPLY PERSONAL TO ME#I am very privileged on many fronts but also not#i don't like white people#people are trying to justify caitlyn rn#if it looks like a cop and talks like a cop it's a COP#she didn't need to go this far#she didn't need to fucking poison the air the people of zaun breathe#she didn't need to be so brutal- that was a choice#and none of this got her any closer to jinx#Jinx fucking lured her in#HER GIRLFRIEND WHO SHE SHOULD LOVE IS ZAUN#Idc if cait was raised with these kind of thoughts#i'm allowed to be mad at the fascist in the making idc idc#Vi suffered SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE OF ENFORCERS#enforcers killed her parents- they put her in prison for practically all of her childhood#Mel lost her home-her mother is actively conspiring against her- she lost her brother- and yet she KNOWS when it's too far#cassandra gave her the damn key hoping cait would be better#she sure as fuck is totally respecting her mom right by using the thing she made to POISON PEOPLE#'she's grieving- she's depressed'- she's calling people animals i don't think she was too far from this kinda mentality#like why is it such a steep slide for her?#her environment shaped her yeah but that's an explanation- not an excuse to go easy on her#again- MEL MEDARDA#also jon asking jay to fucking go easy on Nia when she COLONIZED HIS COUNTRY SHUT THE FUCK UP
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