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muntitled · 1 year ago

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omg hi pookie bear , hru ?

i’m going feral and have a request <\3 hmm what if anton hasn’t seen his gf in a few months because she stays in the states . they usually make sure to call and check in with each other every night but maybe for the last few days she hasn’t been responding too much but only because she’s flying to go surprise him ! so basically a bit of angst then fluff at the end loll (and a little smut if ur up to it 🤓👆🏾) .

also, can i be 🎀 anon ?!

Of course, my darling! Thank you for the lovely request, I literally had so much fun writing this omg.

𝐈𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐅𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐡 | 𝐀𝐧𝐭𝐨𝐧 𝐋𝐞𝐞

- Pairings: Anton Lee x Fem!Reader

- Warnings: Language, Established Relationship, Codependency, Angst, Jealousy, Relationship Paranoia, Possessiveness, Manipulation, Smut (+18, Minors DNI), Spitting, Size Kink, Praise Kink, Dry Humping, Unprotected Sex, Needy Sex

He wouldn't call himself obsessive.

That's not the correct word. Infatuation would probably best explain the tempest of emotions rattling through his brain when his phone rings, signaling a video call from you.

Sungchan's chest rises and falls with the extremities of their evening workout. He barely keeps himself toppling over when he and the rest of the group watch Anton lumber to his bag in large, quick steps

"Yo?" Sohee asks, anatomically defeated as he races to catch his breath.

"Carry on, without me," Anton throws over his hunched shoulder. He is cupping his phone with both hands when he enters one of the many bathrooms peppered throughout the gym, letting his feet guide him almost robotically into a stall while his finger swipes to answer the video call. At the sight of your relaxed smile, Anton exhales lightly.

He knew it's particularly bad to form dependant relationships, but he couldn't exactly help himself, can he? Your voice is just so light when you say, "Hi," and his is equally shy as he replies with his quiet "Hi yourself."

Anton can not help himself from being so incredibly infatuated. He's diving headfirst into codependency, but hey, at least he is aware.

At least he is aware that he would do quite literally anything for the girl in trapped in his phone, and you would do the same for him, therefore it is of no surprise at all when he airly says, "You're so pretty,"

His voice is barely above a whisper and his eyes are bright as he buries the lower half of his face in the comforting fleece of his black sweater. "Really pretty,"

An airy sort of chuckle escapes the confines of your lips, and Anton's pulse begins to race as he takes note of your tongue swiping over your bottom lip. "Anton, did you hear anything I just said?" If it weren't for the slight hesitation that pollutes the sound of your beautiful voice, Anton would've gladly kept staring at your lips. But his heart sinks imperceptibly as he gazes back at you apprehensively.

"Uh- no," he says, "I was too busy thinking about how excited I am for you to get here." The panic only begins to set when your smile wavers.

"Oh... about that-"

"No," he whispers, "Please don't do that-"

"My boss hasn't exactly cleared me for a vacation day-"

Anton is livid, but his voice remains stable. "We have spoken about this for 2 months!"

"You know how my boss can be," you reply, "He hasn't given me off, Anton. I have no one to cover my shift, I'm sorry!" You exclaim, as the dreaded guilt begins to trickle into your voice. Anton's eyes narrow, and he brings his phone closer. Temporarily ignoring his whirlwind of negative emotions, Anton instead skeptically asks, "Where are you?" That doesn't look like your bathroom."

Anton's heart only sinks lower into the pit of his stomach when he notices a quick hint of alarm flash through your eyes before you're pulling the camera back into a more intimate aspect ratio as you prattle on. "Yeah, I just decided to head to the movies to make myself feel better. Maybe you should do the same," your voice is tight and layered with anxiety as if you were... lying to him.

Anton cannot imagine why you would want to do that, least of all to him. He knew when you lied because you both did it together. On myriad occasions.

He made you call up your part-time job on multiple occasions, rubbing smoothe, encouraging circles on your belly while you feigned an illness just to spend more time with him.

In high school, you had both lied to each of your parents about 'studying together' when in actual fact, those 4 had been excuses to make out messily in your sheets. Exploring confusing emotions until a simmering heat flowed through the both of you while Anton's large hands began to pet over new, various spots on your body.

He had never been on the receiving end of your dishonesty, not even since he left the country. But here you are, evading eye contact, stuttering over your words and lying...

to him.

"How's the team workout been, big boy?" He notices with grave finality how quick you are to not only change the subject, but to weaponize a nickname that you knew would have him melting for you.

Is this what you have both become?

Was he seriously being manipulated?

Was he...

Perhaps...

Being cheated on?

The thought sent a wave of nausea threatening to spill out of his badly pursed lips, and perhaps you realize, from years of studying Anton's non verbal expressions, that he was thinking of something very grave and very bad.

"Hey, didn't you say you only had five minutes?" Your voice is like the tingling goosebumps left in the wake of your nails raking across his skin and he shivers slightly.

"Yeah," his voice, although characteristically quiet, is guarded and you frown, perhaps noticing that you have a lot of making up to do.

Anton suddenly, quite literally out of the blue, asks, "Remember when you said you went bra shopping the other day?

"Yeah?" You ask, completely oblivious to the darkened thoughts polluting your boyfriend's mind. You watch his eyes tare into yours as he monotonously asks.

"Are you wearing any of the new ones right now?"

"Anton, aren't you in the middle of-"

He immediately cuts in, voice impatient and snide, "They can carry on without me, it's fine."

It was petulant, but Anton needed to know you still belonged to him. He needed to know that high school wasn't some sick fever dream you could just swiftly move past as if it meant nothing. He needed to know that.

"Can I see?"

You curtly comply, and you look around before pushing yourself further into the stall. You both found yourselves on opposite end of a cellular line, both silent with the weight of your attraction to one another, keeping your eyes glued to the screen.

"Please?" He asks, in an airy voice, "for me?"

Anton knew from the strike of guilt in his chest that it was not a morally correct thing to do, but what else was there?

You would be away from him, indefinitely. He would have to spend another evening, another week, another month without your body to hold onto. Not to mention, the jealousy at this new hypothetical boyfriend still hung heavily on his shoulders.

Besides, Anton's guilt completely disappeared when you begrudgingly pulled the string of your halter neck down until the material was falling flmisily down your torso, exposing your chest to him. Anton released a wobbly breath while his hand almost immediately went to cover the bulge, forming in his oversized pants. "Oh god," he whispered.

It was so remarkably mesmerising watching your boyfriend slips so easily into desire. You knew he was angry and that made this part of the mission remarkably uncomfortable, but instead, you choose to focus on Anton's lumbering breathing through the screen of your phone. His large eyes hooded and locked onto your breasts, still very much covered by your white lace bra.

Although he cannot see anything besides cleavage, Anton reckons he could cum just from this. That's how bad he needs you, that's how bad he yearns for your soft, grounding presence to be near him.

But your phone chimes. And just as Anton's jaw locks, you exclaim, "Babe, I have to go-"

"What?" The frown on his face is astounding, but you're already propping your phone up to pull up the strings of your dress.

His protests fall on deaf ears.

You could not very well tell him that you have already touched down in Korea. You couldn't tell him the unrecognizable bathroom stall was a sterile cubicle in the international airport. You couldn't tell him that you were closer than he thought.

"My movie is gonna start soon,"

His shoulders visibly deflate and your heart pounds faster in your chest.

"Skip it,"

"I'll call later okay?"

"Skip the movie."

"I love you,"

When you abruptly ended the call, Anton stared at his screen until the dimness turned to black, with only one question permeating through his restless mind.

'Do you?'

⋆⭒˚｡⋆

"You say you hear me," Sohee's voice reaches the rafters as the group of boys leave the gym. "You hear me, but do you feel me?"

"Gross," Anton mumbles, leaving Sohee behind.

"It's a simple question," The older boy continues, "at what point does water become soup?"

"When any reasonable amount of seasoning is added," pipes up Shotaro, adjusting the straps of his work out bag along his shoulder.

"Don't encourage him," Eunseok grumbles as they all walk out into the cool night air.

Anton's gaze is still lowered to the floor, but his breath stutters momentarily at the sudden rush of the open air.

"So salt water can be considered soup?" Sohee scoffs, "That's what you're telling me right now?" The group groans in unison, all beginning to walk like a hive mind to the nearest restaurant. All except Anton, who is quieter than usual, whose only plans for the evening consist of wallowing in self-pity.

"Hey, um, I'm just gonna go home," he says, causing the group of boys to stop in their tracks. Anton evade their curious, worried gazes.

"Not when you look like you're about kill yourself-" Shotaro says, attempting to step closer to Anton, but only frowning when the youngest takes a step back.

"That's okay," he attempts to reassure his friends, "There's a beat thats been..." Anton does vague hand gestures to the side of his head, "I wanna go work,"

He was already walking away, head bowed, and headphones pushed over his head, walking into the night before his friends could even get a word in...

⋆⭒˚｡⋆

He could not describe his feelings as Jealousy. That somehow felt like to tame a word to describe the flurry of emotions hanging so heavily on Anton's face as he pushes the password into the door's keypad, before kicking his shoes off at the door.

Anger was certainly a part of it. The large monolith of emotions threating to burst right through him. He felt unpleasantly overstimulated, even in the silence of the apartment. He felt like anything and everything was threatening to have him burst at the seams, his emotions running along the rim of his usually calm and collected state of mind, ready to spill over and make a dreaded mess everywhere.

Anton's only plans for the night had been to lock himself in his dorm room, perhaps crying, perhaps screaming, perhaps knocking himself out for a couple hours with his prescription sleeping pills. Anything to make this horrific strain on his heart disappeared.

The baggy clothes he is accustomed to wearing somehow appear bigger and sloppier as he lumbers his way deeper into the apartment, heart sinking the more steps he takes.

"Oh look,"

Cold, piercing phantom pain zings through his heart, kickstarting every dormant sleepy cell in his body.

"A dinosaur,"

Anton thinks that he couldn't even move if he wanted to. His socks are glued to the threshold, watching you, or perhaps an apparition of you, laying lazily on his bed.

His bed.

“Fuck,” he whispers to himself, and you watch with furrowed brows as Anton brings his two hands up to his face. You immediately push yourself off the bed when he begins to slap lightly at his cheeks, whispering incoherently about asylums and potentially getting a contact high.

His cheeks are already bright red when you stumble your way in front of him.

“Woah, Big boy,” your hands are on his wrist, effectively stopping Anton from reddening the skin any further.

He can feel you. He can feel the softness of your palms struggling to enclose around his large wrists.

“This is real,” he whispers, watching with wide, doe eyes as a smirk curls at the end of your lips. Before you can reply in whatever witty or snarky remark you had cooked up, Anton was already bending his head until his lips were crashing down to yours.

He very surprisingly, very uncharacteristically pours his strength into the kiss until you were stumbling back rather clumsily into his room.

Anton crumbles into a flurry moans and groans as he slips his tongue inside your mouth, melting into a whimpering puddle when your tongue brushes against his. “B-But when?” he breathes out before reattaching his lips to yours, letting his hands roam unabashedly over every part of your body it can find.

The infuriating need to breathe causes him to pull apart from you once again, but he never strays too far. Anton’s fingers dig into your sides until he's pulling your dress over your head. He wishes to capture every single inch of your exposed body to memory. The way you look up at him with a light, relieved smile curling at the sides of your puffy, red lips.

You're so much shorter than him, and it sends his brain into a mindless, state of lust. He loves how big he feels when you two are together, in the flesh with no digital box separating the two of you.

“H-How?” He breathes out, noting immediate that you are in the same white lace bra from your earlier phone call.

There is a cheeky smile on your face when you pull his oversized shirt over his head, all while he stares you down as if you hung the moon.

“I always keep my promises, Ant,”

His body betrays him with a rough shiver and he groans as you push him onto his bed, discarding his shirt behind you. As you prowl your way on top of him, Ant throws his head back into the sheets, nearly hyperventilating at the sight of you straddling his hips. You lift your torso, immediately discarding your bra, and Anton’s hand flies to cup your breasts. This, he immediately decides, is what heaven looks like.

“Fuck, you're so fucking pretty, you know that?” Anton rarely ever swore, so to hear the crass words coated in his airy, breathless voice is enough to have you moaning into the air, arching your back as you push his face into your chest while you press your core down onto his irresistible bulge.

“Oh God, Anton.”

“Missed you so much,’ he whines, before enclosing his mouth around your nipple, almost instinctively pushing his hips up to meet your desperate grinding. You were quite literally humping like maddened adolescents brimming with too many hormones to know what to do with.

When Anton feels his cock twitching in his pants, he immediately pulls away.

“Fuck,” he breathes out, “I need to be inside of you,” he admits gravely, already getting up to switch places until you were underneath his large and lumbering frame, “I don't think I'll last long,” Another grave admittance. He pushes his hand into his sweatpants, and you watch, mesmerized as he reveals his large, aching cock absolutely leaking precum.

“I'm definitely not gonna last long,” you reassure before eagerly opening your restless legs, “We're gonna cum together, yeah?” Anton squeezes his eyes shut before squeezing the base of his twitching dick. All while you slip your own underwear down.

“Yeah,” he agreed before positioning his cock at your weeping enterance.

You both watch mesmerized as his cock begins to stretch the tight walls of your soaked cunt. The stretch, immediately causing a whimper to slip out of your mouth as you throw your head back into the pillows. You're clenching around him, while Anton coaxes himself into you with shallow thrusts. The rutting being just enough to spill a wave of pleasure over the both of you. He watches you moan with wide, pained eyes.

“I know, baby-” He whisper, “You're doing so good for me, you know that?”

“Fuck, you're so big,” is all you're able to say, effectively causing his hips to stutter.

“F-Fuck I'm not gonna last long-”

Instead of repeating your response, you bring your hips up to meet Anton's thrusts effectively, taking him deeper and deeper until he was fucking you with little to no restraint.

“Oh God,” you whisper, as Anton clumsily brings a hand up to squeeze and pinch at your nipples. Not even a minute later and you're both sitting in the crest of your respective orgasms, looking deep into each other's eyes as if you were communicating that fact. Anton nods, completely dazed.

“Close,” he whimpers, “I'm so fucking close,”

Anton bends his head, spitting directly onto your clit. The sight has your hips stuttering, as the first signs of your orgasm warms your lower abdomen.

“F-Fuck, Ant- I'm-”

The moment his hand travels to rub dizzying wet circles on your clit, you crash into your orgasm.

“Oh fuck- oh fuck-” He fights to keep his eyes open but your squeezing him so hard and Anton can't help but cum directly inside of you. Both your lips are hanging open as your boyfriend attempts to fuck every last drop of his seed into you. You're both releasing months worth of frustration.

The frustration of not being near one another. Of relying on a device to keep your relationship afloat. It all comes crashing down until Anton's is thoughtlessly collapsing on top of you - the weight of a giant landing your front, with his hand playing lazily, wiyh your breasts as you both fight to catch your breathe.

Despite the obvious discomfort, the very last thing you think of doing is pushing him away. Instead, you cradle him closer, raking your fingers into his hair while his eyes flutter shut.

All is quiet, and you vaguely believe Anton may have fallen asleep, but his voice is wide awake as he says, “I thought you were cheating on me.”

You remain quiet, hoping the soft petting on his wild curls was reply enough.

“I'm never letting you go back, okay?”

Your eyes are heavy as you continue to smooothe down his hair, and you whisper, “Okay”.

♡♡♡

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hyperfixatinator · 3 months ago

Text

Where is the line?

In the comics, Tim Drake's moral code is an enigma to me, particularly his stance on the Batclan's no-kill rule. For all the fans who say he's always one step away from full blown villainy, there are even more saying he's a strict goody two-shoes who could never stoop that low.

Then there's the different takes on where Tim draws the line between these two extremes. Personally, I find that line hard to pinpoint. Digging for canon demonstrations of his morals has lead me to more questions than answers. My biggest question right now is:

What counts as breaking the no-kill rule in Tim's eyes?

Luckily, the Robins 2021 comics shed some light on this. In issue #3, "Tim", or rather an imposter of him, said that choosing not to save someone isn't the same as killing them, and that letting a villain die can be a way to get justice. Normally, this point would be moot since it's not Tim himself who said it. However, at the end of issue #6, the real Tim clarified that what the imposter said WAS his real opinion on the matter.

Not only that, but Tim has shown this belief through his thoughts and actions before. Twice.

The first time goes all the way back to Robin 1991 #5. During the fight against King Snake, Tim kicked him through a nearby window, fifty stories above the ground. As King Snake's life hung in the balance, Shiva appeared and commanded Tim to kill him.

Tim refused. He walked away, leaving King Snake entirely at Shiva's mercy.

What gets me is that Tim made no move to save King Snake from falling. And he made no effort to stop Shiva from committing the murder, either. His only thought as he heard the man's scream was "Fifty stories is a long way to fall."

The second time was in Red Robin 2009 #26. Tim orchestrated a whole plan to manipulate Captain Boomerang into getting killed by Mr. Freeze. The whole time, Tim blamed Captain Boomerang for making all those bad choices, despite Tim being the one raising the chances of them being made. Tim believed he was innocent because he wasn't directly participating.

Tim then stopped that plan, but not for any noble reason. He decided that he couldn't let anyone else kill Captain Boomerang but himself.

Tim couldn't bring himself to do that, either. So he had to spare his father's killer in the end.

This seems pretty cut and dry so far, right? Tim believing that letting villains die is alright as long he doesn't do the deed himself? I'd think so too, if there weren't other moments contradicting this.

In Robin #35, Steph insisted on leaving an enemy who got buried under the snow to die. Tim chastised her for it.

Neither of them were responsible for the snow, or for the enemy getting trapped in it. Plus, that guy tried to kill them with a chainsaw moments prior, so he's not exactly an innocent damsel in distress.

Maybe it was because this enemy wasn't a big enough fish to fry. We didn't really get confirmation that this guy has actually killed before, and he's around goon status at best.

But then in Robin #46, Tim chose to save another enemy who got himself into a deadly situation. That enemy was a murderer known as Young El. This time, Tim wasn't telling anyone else why they should save a murderer's life out loud. These were his private thoughts.

Notice how Tim's inner monologue sounded kind of on-the-fence. He contemplated justice finally catching up with Young El as the floorboards gave way, bringing a support beam down on him in the process.

However, Tim immediately switched gears to rescue Young El from under that beam before the water rose too high.

But Tim, as he told Young El the reasons he's saving him, asked himself "Do I even believe what I'm saying?" He could be asking this about two different things he said here. A) "Maybe it's not too late for you to learn something, Young El.", or B) "Death's easier for you when it's the other guy. Death's never been easy for me."

For Tim to doubt his belief in either of these statements is very interesting. He could be questioning if Young El is already too far gone for redemption, or he could be questioning if seeing someone die has never been easy for himself. For all we know, it could be both.

Unfortunately, Tim never got to see if his choice to save him would pay off. Tim wasn't strong enough to lift that beam, and Young El drowned.

There's a question on my mind as I read these pages. What makes this murderer's death different from when Tim let King Snake fall to his "death"? Sure, King Snake didn't actually die, but Tim didn't know that until later when the man came looking for revenge in Gotham.

Tim was once able to simply walk away from what he was certain would be a killer's demise. But then he's consumed by guilt over not being able to prevent a different killer's death down the line, to the point of hallucinating.

On top of that, what changed Tim's mind later? Red Robin #26 and Robins 2021 #3-6 still happened in the future. The only significant difference I can tell is that these two comics involved the killer's of Tim's parents, making it personal. But if the Imposter from Robins 2021 got his beliefs from his profile before his mother's killer got involved, then does that still hold up?

Maybe we should put a pin on it for now. There are other things Tim's done that brings the details of his no-kill rule into question.

Such as that one time Tim actually killed someone with his bare hands.

In Robin issues #51-52, Tim accidentally killed Lady Shiva while drugged on amarilla, a plant that enhances the user's speed beyond human limitations.

It may be argued if the amarilla altered Tim's mind enough to excuse him of fault or not. However, I want to focus on what happened after Shiva was revived. Here's another question to go with the first one:

Does Tim believe the kill still counts if the victim was revived afterwards?

From what I've gathered, yes and no. It's kind of complicated.

After Tim killed Shiva, he was understandably distressed about it, about how he can never take it back.

But after Shiva came back to life? Nothing. He didn't dwell on the fact he broke the vow to never kill. For something that devastating to happen in his life, it's odd that Tim didn't bring it up ever again, privately or otherwise. Especially considering what happened later in Robin #123, when Tim thought he killed Johnny Warlock.

Tim was utterly inconsolable. He lost all faith in his abilities as Robin, and in himself as a whole. It also contributed to his decision to quit being Robin after his dad found out. In general, he seriously dwelled on that "kill" for a much longer time than he had after killing Shiva. The difference being that he knew Shiva was resuscitated immediately afterwards, while Tim didn't know Johnny survived until issue #141.

But there's the fact that Shiva really did die. Her heart and breathing both stopped. So are we to believe Tim moved on from that so easily because she's alive now? What happened to never getting that back?

Come to think of it, not long after Tim killed and revived Shiva, there was someone else who landed in that same boat. Dick.

In Joker: The Last Laugh #6, Dick brutally attacked the Joker after believing he killed Tim. Dick ended up accidentally killing Joker instead, before the clown was resuscitated.

Here's the thing. While Tim was trying to comfort Dick, saying that it's ok because Joker's alive now, Dick didn't believe so. He was still distraught that he killed someone. The fact Joker came back to life afterwards didn't matter to him. To Dick, it still counted. So what does that say about Tim?

Before we move on, there's another person Tim knows who also died and came back from the grave. Jason.

Tim openly acknowledged Jason was killed before coming back, too. Multiple times. For example, when they met up in Red Hood and the Outlaws 2011 #8.

Tim hadn't shown any signs that he thinks Jason's murder doesn't count anywhere, except for maybe once.

In Knight Terrors: Robin #2, Tim and Jason had a heart-to-heart, and Tim said something strange.

"You survived."

Except Jason didn't survive. He died. To say Jason survived that night would've meant he never died to begin with. Him being alive now doesn't change that. Was this Tim telling a white lie to make Jason feel better? Or does Tim see being revived after death as "surviving"?

Ok, now we can move onto the next question. Or rather, bear with me as we go back to the first question. It's a broad topic with plenty more to talk about.

What does Tim count as breaking the no-kill rule?

We already asked how Tim feels about bringing villains back from the dead after killing them. And we asked how Tim feels about leaving a villain to die without getting directly involved. However, we still don't know how much involvement Tim needs to have in an enemy's death before he'll take responsibility for it.

We can confirm he won't mercy kill in Red Robin #21, even if it means giving someone a fate worse than death. No exceptions.

Tim also doesn't allow anyone he's actively teaming up with to kill, especially if he's the one in command. He's been amicable with known killers before (Huntress and Pru, for example), but only when they remain non-lethal while working alongside him.

Apart from that, though, it becomes less clear. However, I think this is a good place to expand on when Tim blew up a lot of League of Assassins bases in Red Robin #8.

I'm not going into whether or not those explosions actually killed anyone. I've seen evidence supporting both sides of this debate, so I'm just going to say it's up to interpretation. What I AM talking about is whether or not Tim would've felt responsible if they had killed someone.

Before overloading every generator in the LOA database, Tim gave a warning to the Wanderer. He told her that he couldn't be held responsible for what would happen to her if she didn't leave.

After initiating the explosions, Tim warned the White Ghost that they had fifteen seconds to leave before it was too late.

Fifteen seconds. That explanation on the mistake of letting him in might've taken roughly another fifteen to twenty seconds. Did the other bases even get a full minute head start? The way some of the people were already running away could imply they at least got a warning, but it's possible they might not have.

Even if everyone in every base received a warning, would that be enough for Tim to avoid holding himself accountable if they didn't make it out in time? Tim's the one who rigged the bases to explode, but I guess giving someone a warning means it's now their fault for not heeding it?

We can't be sure he even considered the possibility of those explosions killing anyone. Tim knew they were dangerous enough to bring the whole Cradle down, and the other ones we saw looked pretty powerful (except the ones in Ra's hideout). But Tim also called Ra's a murderer right after that happened, which would've been very hypocritical if Tim himself thought he committed murder.

So, my guess is either A) Tim relied on sheer luck for those explosions not causing any casualties and chose to believe they hadn't, or B) Tim didn't believe the deaths of anyone caught in them would be his fault.

Again, this isn't about whether or not blowing up the LOA bases killed anyone. It's about how willing Tim was to take that risk, and if he would've blamed himself for anyone getting killed from it.

Either way, it's canon that Tim had no guilt for the explosions he caused, or for anything he did before Red Robin #22. Just ask the Sword of Sin.

This is an exerpt I got from the Fandom DC Database on the Sword of Sin:

"The Sword of Sin can be ignited with the mind of the wielder, if the person is powerful enough. The sword has the ability to conjure in the mind its victims all of the sins for which they are guilty or have not atoned for."

When Tim was stabbed with this sword, he was immune. The Sword of Sin decided he was innocent. Although, I have to ask how reliable this sword was in making that judgement. If the sword is judging others based on its own set principles, then something's not right here.

The Sword of Sin was also used on Dick, and he wasn't immune. It dug into Dicks subconscious and unearthed memories he'd long since repressed. Memories of himself watching a boy get beaten to near death, and then doing nothing. He just walked away.

Now, tell me why the sword brought this to light, but not the time Tim left King Snake to die!

It wasn't an accident. Tim deliberately chose to leave instead of trying to save this man from the murderous Lady Shiva. Sure, Tim was no match for Shiva and he might've not been able to stop her, but the same could be said for an eight year old Dick not stopping a group of much older kids. Neither of them tried to stop the attackers.

Tim didn't atone for it, either. When King Snake returned in Batman #469, Bruce told King Snake that it wasn't Tim who left him to die. We know that's a lie, but Tim never corrected this. He let Shiva take all the blame.

We have two instances of a boy choosing not to prevent someone from having a near death experience. One guilty, and one innocent.

Did the Sword of Sin think Tim was justified because King Snake was corrupt? That doesn't sound holy to me.

Was it because Tim didn't feel any guilt over it, while Dick did? Can the sword's judgement be thrown off by the victim not feeling any shred of guilt over their actions, even subconsciously?

That could make sense given what we know Tim did in the past: King Snake falling, the vandalism (explosions), and ALL the lying over the years (Tim reviving Shiva might count as atonement, so I'm not including that). If the sword based its judgement on God's will alone, then odds are high it would've picked up on one of these.

Even so, I'm not going to sit here and say this is definitely the case. I'm not familiar enough with how the sword effects other characters to make that call.

If this is indeed false, then did the DC universe's version of God decide to pardon Tim of his sins when he prayed earlier that same issue, despite him not believing he had any? I mean, who knows, right?

You can probably see why there's more questions than answers. The point is Tim didn't have any guilt for the things he did before Red Robin #22. Tim was canonically convinced he had nothing to atone for.

So then why did he say the opposite later in Knight Terrors: Robin #2?!

In the heart-to-heart between Tim and Jason, Tim tells him this:

"You have a lot to atone for...We all do..."

Tim knows that the words "we all" include him, right? By saying this, Tim admitted to also having things he needs to atone for, right?

Is this another white lie to make Jason feel better? Is it one of those slight changes the New 52 made to the canon? If not, then why did he change his mind? Did his no-kill rule change and make him feel guilty for some past actions? Is it not the no-kill rule, but something else?

What changed?!

Where does Tim draw the line?

I don't know. We've narrowed it down to a general area, but it's kinda hard to see a line when it's so blurred it could be a gradient.

Tim baffles me. He acts as a steady moral compass for others when he can't even seem to stay consistent with his own. You're free to call it poor writing (and honestly, fair), but I find his hypocrisy fascinating.

That's what it is, isn't it? Tim's a hypocrite who's completely oblivious to being one. And it's not like this was never mentioned in the comics before. Damian called him out on it!

In Batman & Robin 2011 #10, Damian confronted Tim about his near-murderous reaction when Fist Point killed Artemis (Teen Titans Vol 4 annual #1). Damian then accused Tim of constantly rejecting him because they have more in common than Tim's willing to admit.

It's debatable how accurate that accusation was, but Tim had a pretty volatile reaction to it.

"I believe in every choice I make!"

Does he? I don't think someone who's so sure of what he believes in would contradict himself to this extent. Especially if he wasn't doing it on purpose.

He wouldn't vehemently push Bruce's no-kill rule onto others and berate them for bending that rule, only to go and bend that same rule himself when the Batclan isn't around. He also wouldn't exploit what he thinks are loopholes, decide later that those loopholes broke the no-kill rule, and then earnestly claim he never broke it.

Why is he like this?! He's had arguably the most normal childhood out of the whole Batclan before becoming Robin! What could've made him so fickle about this?!

Where does he draw the line? And how will he know when he's crossed it?

#batman #dc #robin #tim drake #red robin #theory #analysis #long post #tim drake is a menace #unhinged tim drake #To think all of this was written without mentioning Tim's corrupt future selves #or the numerous times he's actually contemplated or attempted murder #Believe me I would've loved to add 5-10 more screenshots of those moments alone #but I hit the 30 image limit :(#Anyway I want to study Tim in a lab #Feedback is welcome #I'm aware I hadn't read all the DC comics so I could've missed something

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lovelyyandereaddictionpoint · 5 months ago

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A Changed Future (2) | Yandere Isekai

Part 1

It’s so irritating for Haruko

He remembers how he used to try and make noise in the beginning, when the same thing happened to him

But even without your struggling, he’s got more obstacles than he thought

“Tch all these guys getting in our way, maybe I should just kill them.”

“Haru no!”

“Why not, I'm sure you did it when I was trapped.”

“That…that doesn’t make it right!”

“So? Who cares about right when we’re in love? I think it was you who said that.”

Either way with or without your approval he’s figuring out a way to take down his newfound rivals

He kind of hopes they are as ambitious as the friends who recently abandoned him

Too bad they aren’t

In the original story, the crazy thing about the protagonist was that despite their obsessive love for Haruko and general disregard for those who got in the way of that was otherwise really inspiring

Breaking away from their elitist family for their violent morals ironic right

Joining the workforce, easily rising because of their work ethic and intelligence

And all that while beautifully evading a less-than-clean detective trying to pin the blame of random crimes on them

Which of course got them their own male leads attempting to pursue their affections

Always doomed to fall short because of circumstance or the protagonist suavely crushing their hopes to gush about their love

It was a uniquely terrible tragedy for their characters to be written this way

That’s what the random reviewers would say

Which is why you did feel inclined to maybe entertain them a bit more than the original protagonist would have ever done

“Since you are quitting….I hope you’ll let me treat you to dinner. For all your hard work of course.”

“Uh sure but I have to be home by sunset.”

“That’s a shame then we’ll have to—Wait. Did you say you would?”

“Yeah, are you okay?”

“YES! Ahem I mean yes I’m fine! I look forward to a nice evening together!”

Unknowingly furthering the obsession the protagonist was barely keeping at bay

“So mind telling me what you ordered that day at the restaurant?”

“I think it was my favorite dish there called the berry delight but I’m not sure. I think they changed the menu since I was there.”

“Why not confirm it later today? That way you can tell me if you did see the missing classmate of yours.”

“But I don’t remember exactly where I sat–”

“Then we’ll just have to sit in every spot until it rings a bell.”

“I don’t know if that’s–”

“Don’t fret. I’ll be paying but there's no way we’ll get to try every table. We’ll have to come back multiple times.”

“Okay…”

“No worries I’m sure you’ll get tired of eating there so we’ll go to some other places to give you a rest. Anywhere you wanted to try?”

You’d be foolish to think you could escape them by agreeing to Haruko’s entrapping of you

It only takes a day of you not responding to messages that they both eagerly awaiting you at your door

And after the first few times, Haruko shooing them away they begin to get resourceful

“Yeah bud nice try their still out.”

“Hm well say that to my lovely warrant right here.”

“Wait! H-h-hold on! Geez I-i’ll go get them now but they are not going to be happy with you!”

It really doesn’t get better as the guard against the protagonist’s secrets begins to be let down as interested parties slowly make their way in

You don’t have the same ruthlessness or ability to deceive as the protagonist you took over for

On top of that you never actually read the webtoon so you’ll be left trying to piece together whatever few weak points the protag has

Where if you hadn’t already started to make your pursuers interested all those faults are fuel for their agenda

“It’s so unfortunate that the company can sign off on your absence during this suspicious crime but I don’t mind editing records if you wouldn’t mind spending time with me. That way I can vet your personality myself. Over wine of course!”

It’s overwhelming constantly being pulled in 3 directions

What’s worse you’re completely oblivious when the latest obstacle in the protag’s perfect life finally makes themselves known

“Hello darling, it took us years to find you but we did it!”

“Don’t look like that come give your Mama a hug!”

Part 3: Coming Soon

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milkyboybluewriter · 3 months ago

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Why Bill Hates Dipper

Ever since the Book of Bill came out, I've been pondering why Bill seems to love tormenting Dipper.

I don’t doubt Bill Cipher could find amusement in anyone and everyone’s suffering but he seems to take a special interest in hurting the youngest Pines. This even goes back to their first interaction where Bill blows a hole in Dipper’s chest before Dipper had said a single word to him, as opposed to Mabel whom he ignored despite her attempt to tackle him moments beforehand.

In Sock Opera, Bill repeatedly harms Dipper’s body with forks, drawers, stairs, drowning, and who knows what else off-screen. And in perhaps the darkest moment of any Gravity Falls media, Bill’s note from Journal 3 boasts about his ‘grand finale’ of killing Dipper, making it look like a suicide, and forcing the poor boy to wander the mindscape forever.

During Weirdmageddon Bill repeatedly ridicules Dipper after Ford’s capture, teasing him with insults, Ford’s body, and burning his precious journals in front of him before ordering his Henchamniacs to eat him. In Mabel’s Bubble he responds to Dipper’s rejection by turning Fake Wendy into maggots and delivers an ominous warning to an obviously disturbed Dipper.

This trend of tormenting Dipper has only intensified with the Book of Bill and Thisisnotawebsite.com. Every mention of Dipper in the book is an insult or mockery, including two pages dedicated to embarrassing moments of his young life. Meanwhile, on the website he tries to trick Dipper into staring at the sun until the boy goes blind.

So why does Bill seem to have a special interest in making Dipper Pines miserable?

It could be as simple as the bully picking on the victim. Maybe Bill thinks Dipper takes himself too seriously and wants to knock him down several pegs. Or perhaps Bill resents Dipper for being the closest to what he considers Lawful Good among his family, or for trying to be a hero while categorising the town’s weirdness in opposition to Bill’s desire to create chaos and misery, or because he’s the primary antagonist and Dipper is the primary protagonist?

But Bill probably doesn’t hold Dipper in high enough regard for that to be his only reasoning. In fact, Bill appears to have a very low opinion of Dipper, in comparison to certain other members of the Pines family.

In both Book of Bill and Dipper and Mabel’s Guide to Mystery and Non-Stop Fun, Bill claims to like Mabel, comparing her free-spiritedness with his desire to spread turmoil. To him, fun and chaos are the same thing and Mabel’s all about having fun and doing whatever she wants, whatever other people think of her.

Ford worshipped Bill for a time, and is the one who summoned him and created the portal. Feats Bill was so pleased by, that he apparently grew some degree of affection for Ford if the Book of Bill is to be believed; telling him about his past, ‘gifting’ him with dead rats and the like. Even though Bill answered Ford's attempts to escape him with horrific torture, Bill still offered him the position of Henchmaniac when he achieved physical form, implying he was willing to put their past aside, on his terms.

Bill’s interactions with Stan are limited to entering his mind and the final battle. Perhaps, as a fellow conman and trickster, it could be argued Bill might approve of Stan’s crimes even if he’s not exactly impressed by them. But Thisisnotawebsite.com makes it clear that any affinity he may or may not have had for Stan is gone. Now there’s only bitterness and rage at having been bested by someone he deems a joke.

Sounds familiar.

Because it was Dipper who brought the others into Stan's mind and taught them how to fight back against Bill. Dipper found Wendy and Soos, rescued Mabel and got the ball rolling on the resistance movement that led to Bill’s defeat. In Mabeland especially, Dipper proves his tenacity by being the only one capable of resisting what Bill declares is his most diabolical trap.

And when Dipper proved he had the strength to refuse his greatest temptation, Bill reacted by turning heaven into hell for a few moments. Again, a member of the Pines family had rejected his promise of granting their greatest desire. But this time, it wasn’t the genius Ford who’d rejected him and threatened his plans, it was the meek little boy - the lesser twin in Bill’s eye.

Dipper isn’t wild like Mabel, brilliant like Ford, or cunning like Stan. He’s just a kid trying his hardest to do what’s right. A concept Bill no doubt finds hilarious.

It’s one thing to be bested by a foe you respect or admire, but it’s quite another to be beaten by someone you consider a joke.

But he was. Repeatedly. First by Dipper and finally by Stan.

And it probably drives him mad.

#gravity falls #dipper pines #book of bill #stan pines #bill cipher #ford pines #mabel pines

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spngi · 4 months ago

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My tears ricochet | mafia!carlos sainz jr x reader

Part 7

summary: Mr. and Mrs. Sainz lived in a dream for many years, now everything is falling apart and they need to deal with their feelings

warnings:Grammar mistakes, mentions of violence, Carlos is an idiot, mentions of cheating, sexual content, angst.

I watch the man lying on my bed, Carlos is in the same position as the night before, breathing high and I can smell the alcohol of perspiration infesting the room. I open the curtains and windows and let the sun enter along with the breeze to clean the smell of the room.

The man doesn’t move, still too drunk to wake up and I know that an infernal hangover awaits him.

“Wake up” I pinch the skin of his shoulder and he just murmurs leaving me with no patience. “The phone doesn’t stop ringing and if I have to solve any other problem with ports and tax I’ll throw the phone at you, carlos”

He just grunts, opens his eyes slowly and regrets it immediately.

“Good morning,” he murmurs, hoarse voice.

“Good morning” I approach him and extend the cup of coffee with the medicines for him.

“What’s going on?” I watch him scratch his eyes and face me, his eyes stopping when he sees the green nightgown I’m wearing.

It was good to provoke Carlos, even more after everything he told me yesterday, it was good to leave him desperate the same way he left me. The green piece was just a good detail to add to Carlos’ punishment.

“That idiot from the Port of Brussels does not stop calling, I have already solved the situation but it seems that he is too incompetent or just can’t stand to receive orders from a woman” I murmur to Carlos “me and Charles are solving this, but your accountant is also calling to talk about taxes, and we have to leave in a few hours for your cousin’s wedding preparations.”

“I can just...” he breathes, closes his eyes. It’s a lot of information for his head exploding and I could even laugh if I was in the mood. “Lay down for a while? Lie down with me, let’s forget all these calls”

This time I can’t help laughing, Carlos’ words funny enough for my state of mind. As if nothing had happened, as if that was his way of fixing things.

“Get up, Carlos! We still have to pack our bags” I murmur to him, leaving towards the closet.

“You look beautiful in green” his voice resonates groggy around the room.

“I know”

...

It’s strange to share the joy of creating a bond from a new family when mine was falling around. Although I still didn’t know exactly what to do, and the presence of carlos behind me wherever I went like a shadow left me stunned, the word divorce kept returning to my mind.

Maybe it was time for me to give up after all.

The excitement of being with the sainz family, the effort I had in buying the best wedding gift that this couple could receive, the joy in the eyes of the bride for knowing that she would soon carry the surname sainz as well. None of this was able to cheer me up, and I felt like an intruder taking off the luck of the couple.

I had once read in a Lima Barreto book the following phrase “we did not understand each other, their joys were not mine, my pains were not even perceived” and I never felt so represented.

Carlos seems to want to surround me, fill me with his attention, with his affection but that only makes me more uncomfortable, because I know that morning he didn’t choose me when he received that phone call, didn’t even think of me twice or doubted that I had done that. I think I could only really get over it by hearing him apologize, real apologies as an adult man and not that drunk show he gave the other night.

The shared hotel room becomes small enough for me, suffocating with the presence of Carlos. And the game of teasing each other ends up becoming a fierce trap.

I regret having started this game the moment I realized that I couldn’t get away from Carlos here, miles away from our house sharing a normal size hotel room. So every time I showed up before getting dressed or just in a towel after the shower I needed to hear him begging so that he could have me or just touch me, and for most of the nights I need to sleep frustrated with all the words and promises that I don’t let Carlos fulfill.

It is on the night of the rehearsal dinner, the day before the morning of the wedding that I let myself be defeated, maybe if I just let things flow I would feel better, I would remember what it was like to have a happy marriage and Carlos has always provided infinite amounts of pleasure.

I wait for Carlos to get out of the shower, sitting on the end of the bed, watching the TV passing an old movie, waiting and hoping that Carlos will continue begging tonight and don’t leave me a desperate mess today.

When he finally appears in only sweatshirt pajama pants and watches me, sitting, wearing only the old Real Madrid t-shirt of Carlos that became my pajamas a long time ago.

“You’re beautiful, I don’t get tired of saying that” he speaks, hoarse voice and body leaning on the door stop. “Please, cariño! Please let me show you how much I appreciate you, that I love you”

His voice comes out desperate and when he calls me cariño I can’t avoid the chill crossing my body. He realizes and takes the opportunity to get closer to me.

“Please” he whispers, kneels in front of me, brown eyes never breaking the contact, his hand is content to hold my ankle and kiss the area there. “Let me just be with you again, prove you, please I’m begging”

“Why did you do this to us?” I ask him, the same foot he holds I use to move his body away from mine.

“Because I couldn’t see you grow up and be like me,” he admits, “And I’m sorry I didn’t believe you, I know that words will never fix this but I want you to know that I will do everything for us”

I loosen the strength of my leg against him and let him get closer.

“Can I kiss you?” He asks.

“Don’t make me regret it” I murmur to him who doesn’t waste time, the big hands pull me by the waist and the mouth joins in mine. He is desperate and anxious after so much time away and provocation.

Carlos’ hands explore the sensitive skin under the t-shirt, the light touch of his fingers making me more anxious for him, pulling the black curls of his soft hair in the form of retribution. He takes the T-shirt off my body in a single movement when he separates the kiss, his hot mouth going down kisses around my neck, lap and letting himself play with my nipples, his teeth rubbing on the sensitive skin, he is still kneeling between my body, his hands holding my waist keeping me still with his grip, delivered to him.

“Carlos” I call his name, lust flowing from my voice.

“Don’t worry, darling. I’ll take care of you” he murmurs, his mouth slipping through my body, one of his fingers caressing the already wet fabric of my panties and I hear him moan along with me when he realize that I’m already like this at his slightest touch.

I kiss him again, my hands firm on Carlos’ back probably leaving nail marks, he bites my lip and I moan, my panties going to the ground in a quick gesture coming from him, his right hand playing with the proximity of where I want him the most.

He separates the kiss, arrogant smile on his face before bending down to where I need him the most, leaving small kisses on the sensitive skin of my thigh and getting even closer, and when he arrives in my pussy I let myself lay my body on the bed, my breathing already heavy with the slightest touch. Carlos’ mouth explores my intimacy, my feet resting on his shoulders, one of his hands squeezing my chest while the other focused on provoking my entrance with his fingers, his tongue leaving me a mess crying out for him and after all this time I didn’t know if I was still prepared for all the pleasure that carlos could provide.

He devours me like a hungry man, making me squirm in the hotel bed, my hand trying to cover my mouth to stifle the unnecessary amount of moans coming out of it. Although Carlos had a provocative nature, today he had no patience for this, he wanted to catch up on lost time, leaving my high getting bigger and bigger, and the closer I get the more I move.

“I need you to stand still, mi reina” he murmurs, his head tilted up slightly, his mouth swollen, his thumb making slow and torturous circles on my clitoris. And all this vision makes me moan even more his name, he laughs and uses both hands to hold me against the bed, the strong squeeze in my ass. He continues his exploited, knowing that I wouldn’t last much longer that way, the way I pull more and more of his curls leaving him alert of how close I am.

He continues with slower movements even after realizing that I finally came, my head is in an eternal wheezing due to the pleasure I felt and when I open my eyes I slowly observe Carlos, now standing on the end of the bed watching the work he did, he licks his lip and then his fingers and only this action makes me squirm in bed.

“God how I missed you” he murmurs still standing.

“It was you who put yourself in this position” admirably I still have the strength to answer.

“I know, and I regret it every day” he puts one of his knees on the bed and leans over to my body, his hand caresses my disheveled hair “I will never be able to be grateful enough that you insisted on me”

I know that his words are true, I see in the back of his eyes the emotion this time, it is exciting at least to know that he is opening up to me again, to know that I can read his eyes as before and not the icy astonishment he stared at me in recent months. But, again, the memory of knowing that I didn’t put myself in this situation, that I wasn’t my husband’s first choice makes me nauseous. Then I pull him again for a kiss, more delicate this time, without all urgency and hurry, just showing each other’s devotion.

Not even after the four hallucinating orgasms and the most intense fuck I’ve ever had in one night, and after sleeping like a little angel, full of endorphins and in Carlos’ warm arms I wouldn’t be prepared for what would come next. Even after the morning sex, intimate and slow, full of caresses and whispers, declarations of love spread everywhere. I still wasn’t prepared for the weeding day.

I didn’t know I wasn’t prepared for the wedding ceremony, I didn’t know I would feel terrible at every step.

When I joined the bride for the preparations, and I looked at her, wondering if maybe the future that awaited her would be like mine, I wonder if I forgot some tradition during the wedding for it to have lasted so little, Carlos had never seen the wedding dress I wore, I wore a veil, I had a wreath on my head, I had my new piece, an old one borrowed and I had the blue too, I did all the right things and I still envy the innocence of the future Mrs. Saiz in front of me.

I laugh when they comment on how lucky I am, and how the men of the sainz family have the motto of being gentlemen and romantic and I imagine that mine certainly came with a factory problem.

The worst part is the ceremony, and my tears that I can no longer hold mix with those of the other guests who cry with emotion. I watch Carlos on the other side of the altar, next to the other godparents of the wedding, he smiles at me. He doesn’t understand the real reason I’m crying, his eyes seem nostalgic and maybe he’s remembering the day we got married, how he cried when he saw me at the altar, how my dress made me absolutely angelic as he repeated so many times on that special day, how we couldn’t help but smile with the realization that we were finally married.

My heart breaks with every word prophesied by the priest, with every vow I hear the bride and groom speak, with every good memory I had and was destroyed.

“I carlos oñoro sainz, receive you, Maria, as my legitimate wife. I promise to be faithful, love you and respect you. In joy and sadness, in health and disease, in wealth and poverty, for all the days of our lives. So receives this alliance as a sign of my love and my fidelity” the groom recites the vows, the most sacred laws of a marriage and I can only think of how they were all broken.

In how there was no fidelity, support and unity, in how Carlos and I managed to ruin everything, to break something so sacred.

I feel suffocated in the pink dress that matches that of the other bridesmaids, I clean the controlled tears that run down my face before I become a mess.

And it didn’t matter the way Carlos held my hand during the reception, or how he danced romantic songs with me and made slow and passionate love to me at the end of the night, I was already decided when I left that church.

I just didn’t imagine that it would be at a wedding that I would decide to end mine.

We are coming to an end 😭

I don’t know you were waiting for this or what your bets for how things will end but let me know, I love receiving your opinions and I can’t post nos because it may contain spoiler lol 😂

Thank you all ❤️❤️❤️

#f1 fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #carlos sainz #carlos sainz x reader #cs55 #cs55 x reader #angst #carlos sainz au #f1 fic #máfia!carlos sainz #mob!carlos sainz #mafia!f1

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formyloveoflove · 5 months ago

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The Bear S3 and the Choices We Make

Ok. After a second watch of S3, I'm feeling a little bit more optimistic about the future. Trust - it's a sad ending. It's my worst nightmare for Sydney. But there's still hope, and that all lies in what Carmen and Syd decide to do next. Season 3 Spoilers - read at your own risk :)

In S3 E10 Forever, we see our two mains go through a breakthrough. Starting with Carmen, he finally confronts his former boss (who has a name, i think, but fuck him, I ain't using it). It's the first (and only time) that we see Carmen proactively voice his resentment. He avoids his mom (rightfully so imo). He never got the chance with Mikey. But he approaches him, expects the man to have repent (maybe), or at the very least, have a little remorse.

He doesn't. He regrets nothing. In fact, he takes credit for Carmen's success: his hard work, his skills, and his talent. He tells Carmen that he should be thanking him, and that's not even the worst of it. No, for me, it is when he says

Carmen: My life stopped. Chef: That's the point, right? [...] You wanted to be great. You wanted to be excellent. So you got rid of all the bullshit, and you concentrated, and you got focused, and you got great. You got excellent. It worked. You're here. Look at all this

Sound familiar? It should. It's the same sentiment that Carmen said in the Season 2 finale. Remember, he said,

I wasn't here. Right? What the fuck was I thinking? Like I was going to be in a relationship? I'm a fuckin' pyscho. That's why I'm good at what I do. That's how I operate. I am the best because I didn't have any of this fuckin' bullshit, right? I could focus, and I could concentrate.

Carmen's thoughts about himself aren't even his own. They were drilled into him by a man who wouldn't piss on him if he was on fire. He was emulating the abusive behaviors and patterns that crushed him, that gave him "uclers, panic attacks, and nightmares" on the people that he cares about. On his sister, on Richie, on Tina and Marcus. and especially on Sydney, who is the only one who knows exactly how bad it can get. He's hurt those closest to him. He hurts them daily. And for what? And for why? For his own ego.

And this realization leads us to Carmen's first cry.

For three whole seasons, we see this man lose his idolized brother to suicide, witness his alcoholic mother physically, emotionally, and mentally abuse him, and experience mental degradation to the point where it affects his physical health. Not once did he shed a tear. This is the first time Carmen Berzatto lets himself cry. And I think this is the best thing for him. If he chooses to acknowledge the err of his ways, turn back course, and begin again, I think The Bear could be what he wanted it to be. He needs to decide to stop running, stop fighting himself and everybody around him. He needs to let go. Let it rip, right?

However, if this is what he decides to do, the cards ultimately fall into Sydney's hands.

If anybody's been through hell and back, it's Ms. Sydney Adamu. All season she's been forced to work in a volatile environment, putting herself between Carmen and whoever's the victim of his anger. She has her ideas shut down, her skills demeaned, and her credit is outright non-existent. Staff keeps quitting; they're not making any money; and Cicero and Co. is doing some shady background shit.

She's trapped, but not really. Not until she signs that Partnership Agreement. But like she told her dad in S2 E9 Omelette, she doesn't think she has another one in her. She can't have The Bear fail like Sheridan Road. She doesn't want to make the same mistakes she did last time. She wants to grow and learn and make her mark on the industry - prove she's not a failure.

She's waiting for Carmen to make good on his promises from The Table Scene, but he's not.

"You deserve my full focus." But his focus is not on her. Remember the Carmen that noticed when something was off with her? Remember the "say more?" or the "what's up with you?" Remember when they worked together, when the menu was truly theirs? Where was Sydney's "margin" moment? What did Carmen do this scene that signaled to Sydney that he was there and present.

"I couldn't do this without you." He does everything without her. Don't even get me started. From the menu to the list of nonnegotiables. Syd gets to make no decisions after being forced to make ALL the decisions. What is she there for? To be Carm's wrangler, his doormat? What has he does to convince her that she is invaluable?

He's egotistical. He's verbally abusive. He's the exact person that she warned him not to be. That he assured her that he wouldn't be in S1 E3 Brigade. She said,

You know I think this place could be so different from all the other places we've been at. But, in order for that to be true, we need to run things different. [...] But you just didn't really listen, and if this is going to work the way I think we both want it to work, I think we should probably try to listen to each other. The reason why I'm here, and not somewhere else or for someone else, is because I think I can stand out here. I can make a difference here. We could share ideas. I could implement things that make this place better. And I don’t wanna be wasting my time, working on another line or tweezing herbs on a dish that I don’t care about.

He didn't follow through the first time, so she left. But now, it's different. She's put her blood, sweat, and tears into this place. She's made a place (a home even) at The Bear. Leaving is not as simple anymore.

S1 Syd would've taken that CDC offer in a heartbeat. But building something and it failing (like The Bear. like Sheridan Road.) is terrifying. Slowly but surely, Carmen has been chipping away at her confidence and her fire. So much so that good things, like The Offer or the review of her risotto from The Beef, don't feel like good things.

Sydney's Panic Attack is HUGE for her character. We see Sydney at her lowest: her most frightening and vulnerable. She's uncertain. She's in a constant state of panic. And the person that she trusted with her fears and insecurities facilitated this, drove her to this point. It's heartbreaking. I cried when I saw it. No one would blame her for jumping ship. At this point, I encourage it (but she has to talk about it, acknowledge it. no running).

Now, if Carmen decides to change his ways, he'd have apologized to Sydney twice without changed actions. She'd have to believe him after many, many broken promises. At this time, she doesn't trust him, can't rely on him. But when having to decide between staying or going, will she try to trust him again?

Will she? Should she?

That's where I'm at so far. I have more thoughts, but I'll write those out when I get back from my weekend trip.

#the bear #the bear fx #sydney adamu #carmen berzatto #the bear season 3 #the bear gifs #the bear spoilers #the bear meta #sydcarmy

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save-the-villainous-cat · 6 months ago

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Hi! I have a request, i hope it's not too specific or silly! How about an ace character that finds a fellow ace? Could be a villain that keeps flirting and when the hero tells them they don't want anything spicy villain is like 'Oh yeah no I'm ace too, just like teasing you :3'

Regardless of whether you answer or not, i hope you have a wonderful day!!

For better or for worse, the date they were on was rather pleasant.

It had been a trap the villain had prepared which was in retrospect a little bit too obvious. Their nemesis had lured the hero out of their messy apartment with a single note - a warning that quite a few hostages were waiting for them at one of the most expensive restaurants in town.

Without hesitation, the hero had rushed to the address but once the hero had opened the door, it was rather clear that no one was in danger. Instead, the hero got some judging looks from fancy folks when they had thrown open the door, panting.

The villain had looked rather amused when their gazes had met. It was the kind of embarrassment that burnt itself into the hero's brain. A memory that would pop up whenever they tried to fall asleep. It was so bad, in fact, that they considered turning on their heel and leave all together but the villain was too quick.

They raised a glass, their smile crooked.

And the hero felt obligated to walk up to them, now that curious looks were jumping from the hero to the villain.

"You could have told me to wear something nice," the hero hissed as they sat down.

"You look great in everything," the villain purred. Their eyes wandered up and down the hero. "Even in sweatpants."

"You flatter me."

"I'm stating a fact."

The hero took in a deep breath. Their heart was still banging against their rib cage violently. They lowered their voice.

"Why am I here?"

"Because you're gullible?" The villain swayed their wineglass in one hand.

"That's not what I mean."

"Because you're the city's sweet saviour who will always help the poor and innocent?" The hero didn't really know why the villain was toying with them like this. Clearly, there was an ulterior motive behind this. There always was.

Mostly, it was scheme after scheme with them. It was true that the hero was rather fond of them but they'd rather cut their arm off than admit that.

"You know I don't have much time on my hands," the hero said. "So whatever you want from me, make it quick."

For a moment, the villain didn't say anything and exactly that gave the hero enough time to truly look at them. Apparently, they had taken their sweet time to get ready for this date. The hero didn't know how to interpret that. Maybe it was the overall atmosphere of the restaurant or maybe the villain really cared about other's perception of them. The hero couldn't tell.

"I guess there is your answer. I thought it would be nice to spoil you a little," the villain said. "My little workaholic."

Oh, shit.

To say the hero started panicking internally was an understatement. They liked the villain, really liked them. Maybe even more than that.

And the villain seemed to have similar feelings for them.

The hero swallowed.

It had taken them quite a lot of bargaining, denial and a great deal of sadness to realise that they weren't interested in anything sexual. It had taken them a lot of time to come to terms with it. Back then, they had felt guilty for feeling the way they did. Often, they had wondered if there was something wrong with them. If it was just them who felt like this.

It was an almost obsessive fear of exclusion that had infiltrated their mind. It was exhauting to explain their own feelings over and over again and sometimes, they had even forced themselves to go beyond their boundaries.

On some nights, they had lain in bed awake, asking themselves if it was fair to be this way. To never be able to fully give back and love a partner that way. They had lost enough people they had been interested in romantically because of this. It was always the same stupid cycle. Always the same brainless questions that didn't help nor comfort them.

The hero was a different person now. They were much more confident but losing the villain that way wasn't only awkward, it was also a little heartbreak all over again.

"Listen..." the hero said. "I appreciate all of this. You're very sweet."

They dug their nails into their palms. Most people didn't understand. Most people said they were totally fine with it and still, they distanced themselves in the end. It used to make the hero angry but above all, it used to make them very sad.

"But, you know, I'm ace, so. Well, yeah, I...you probably know what that means but if you don't, uhm..."

Suddenly, something lit up behind the villain's eyes.

"Yeah?" The villain smiled. It wasn't a grin. It wasn't a smirk. It was a sweet, lovely smile.

"Huh?"

"You're ace?" they asked. Again, the hero swallowed. They looked down at the still empty dinner plate. It seemed like they had been in here for hours now, even though it had been mere minutes.

"...yeah."

"Me too," the villain said softly and the hero couldn't tell if this was some cruel joke or if this was a genuine gift from the universe. This meant no explaining, no stupid questions. No lost relationship, no arguments over this...For the first time in their life, they felt excited after coming out.

"What? Really? But the flirting and the-"

"I love messing with you, you know that," the villain said, winking. They took a sip of their wine. "And I meant what I said. You need to relax. You need someone to take care of you, even if that someone has to use some questionable methods to get you out of your apartment."

The hero stared at them, almost drunk on happiness.

"Thank you," the hero whispered.

"What a silly thing to say, darling," the villain responded.

Both would return to the restaurant several times after.

Hungry for more.

#m-m-me when someone requests asexual characters -> YIPPIE YIPPIE YIPPIE #cannot believe there is a ratatouille reference in here #writing snippets #heroxvillain snippet #heroxvillain prompt #heroes and villains #hero #villain #heroxvillain #hero x villain #request #an answer for an ask #ace #happy slay month #I need to change that tag so badly its so cringe #asexuality #asexual hero #asexual villain

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3vergr3en · 5 months ago

Note

can i request a headcanon about &team’s fav way to make u cum pretty pls👉🏽👈🏽

&Team’s Favorite Ways to Make You Cum 💦

(💬) PAIRING . ot8 x fem!reader

(📢) CONTENT . Mature writing!! MDNI.

(📃) A/N . Excludes Maki because uh,, duh? But anywayss, hope y’all enjoyed it because I did 🤭

He’s a tease.

And he loves to use that against you.

He won’t fuck you until he makes you cum from his fingers alone.

And I’m not talking about him finger-fucking you,

He’s a boobs type of guy. And he fawns over your breasts.

So his favorite way of making you cum is having one hand rubbing your nipples with his fingers, pinching and lightly twisting them; while his other hand mimics the same moment down on your clit.

And the way you twitch and those sweet, cute little whimpers of yours drives him insane.

Fuma

I know he’s such a gentleman.

Furthermore, I see him being either a soft dom or a pleasure dom.

Nothing submissive (unless if he was begging you to ride his face)

I think he enjoys traditional, vanilla sex.

So, I believe his favorite way of making you cum is slow, yet deep thrusts in missionary.

Don’t get him wrong, he loves to fuck you in ways he could only dream of— but he wants to make sure that you feel everything more than him.

So with every fervent push of his hips against yours, a delicious cry slips out between your lips when you feel the head of his cock pressing against the opening of your cervix.

Nicholas

Just like Fuma, he loves making you cum on his dick.

But in contrast of Fuma, he’s a fucking freak.

So his favorite way of making you cum is by making you fall apart on his cock.

And that’s whether you’re crying out his name when he slams your hips down on his, his cock spreading your walls apart,

whenever he has a rough day, he’ll fuck multiple orgasms out of you back-to-back,

or when he just wants to fuck you stupid because he feels like it <3

Euijoo

Pleasure Dom #2 !!

Possibly borderline submissive tho 🫣

His favorite way of making you cum is by eating you out.

He’s a certified munch!

Stressful day for both either him or you, he’ll always find himself in between your legs, tongue lapping against your puffy clit that’s been violated by his skillful tongue.

But he loves eating you out because of your reactions.

For instance, when you’re about to come, it’s his FAV thing ever.

He likes the feeling of your thighs trapping his head in place and hearing your staggering breaths + your shaky voice when you warn him that you’re going to cum.

And when you finally do cum, you tend to grab at his hair, pulling his face flush against your sopping cunt— and he just lets you do it because that’s exactly what he wants.

Yuma

Hm.. y’all can say whatever you want, but I think he likes making you cum by using your own toys on you.

HEAR ME OUT.

He’s not like one of those guys who’s against sex toys, instead, he’s one of the types who’d use them to his advantage.

You used your vibrator lately? Great! It gives him an excuse to have him use it on you!

He loooves overstimulating you.

So when he’s stuffing you full of his cock, don’t be surprised if you feel a buzzing sensation pressed against your clit.

And don’t be surprised if you end up cumming more than once that night 😖

My submissive little boy 😖

He’s so adamant about wanting to make you feel good and only you, he’s oblivious to his own needs.

And so, his favorite way of making you cum is however you want to cum.

Want his dick pounding inside of you? He’ll gladly do that.

What about his long, slender fingers curling up and against your g-spot? He’ll ask how many fingers you want inside of you.

And what if you simply just wanted to watch him jerk off while you use your vibrator? He’ll put on a little show just for you <3

He’s at your service 💕

Harua

loves loves lovesss using his fingers.

It gives him a sense of pride when he knows that he can make you come apart with just his fingers alone.

And so when you’re laying down on his bed, legs helped spread apart with one of his hands by your thigh, his other hand is against your cunt— two fingers sunken between your wet gummy walls.

Just because he looks cute doesn’t mean he is cute.

He’s a nasty man when it comes to finger fucking you.

and he won’t stop until you’re soaking his sheets in your juices.

Taki

Munch #2!!

Just like Jo, he also just want to pleasure you.

But don’t get him wrong, he would love to get his dick wet.

He’s simply just a munch 🤷🏻‍♀️

If he could, he’d definitely choose to have his head between your legs all day everyday.

He could quite literally eat you out for hours straight if you’d let him.

So yes, if you order him around to give you oral, he’d obey in less than a heartbeat.

But if you tell him to stop, it may be a little hard to get him out of that haze.

And if you try to push his head away because you’re so overwhelmed, he’ll just swat your hands away and hook his arms under your thigh— pulling you closer than before so he can continue eating your pussy.

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puck-luck · 15 days ago

Note

Congrats on 1K!!! Could you do prompt 24, Suit 2 Clubs with Jack Hughes?!

Note: this one is not my best because i've been struggling to fulfill these prompts the past two days <3 BUT we persist!! i have some fire blurbs coming up soon :)

Warnings: spanking, bratty behavior WC: 676

“You’re not being funny,” Jack says.

Except that you are. His frustration is laughable. Although, you will admit that the running gag is getting tiresome. It’s only getting tiresome because you want Jack to fuck you. As much fun as it is for you to see his expression grow more and more fed up, you thought he’d be the point of fucking you silly by now.

“I won’t do it again,” you tell him innocently, batting your eyelashes. “I promise.”

Jack stares at you, not believing a word that comes out of your mouth. He’s stopped his movements, even drawn his fingers out of you. “You promise,” he repeats.

You hold up a hand like you’re swearing on the bible. “I promise.”

Jack bats your hand down. “This is your last chance. You do this one more time and I won’t fuck you.”

You pout at him.

“I mean it,” Jack says. He plants a quick kiss on your pout, which makes it disappear. “If you can’t keep your legs open, then you won’t get my cock at all. Act like a brat and I’ll treat you like a brat.”

“It was an accident,” you whine, using the same argument you’ve been spouting since the first time Jack told you to knock it off.

“You’ve been making the same mistake too many times for it to be an accident,” Jack chides. He pats your hip, then guides you onto your stomach. He pulls you up so that your behind meets his pelvis, then he rubs his hands over the globes of your ass. “It would be a shame to let this night go to waste, baby.”

“It’s not like I can close my legs in this position,” you say.

“Exactly,” Jack replies with a swat. “I’m a problem-solver.”

“You’re annoying,” you grumble, mumbling into the pillow.

You hear Jack scoff behind you. “Come again?”

“Wanna come for the first time,” you reply, glaring at him out of the side of your eyes.

Jack pinches the sensitive skin on the back of your thigh, making you yelp. “Trying to get sassy with me?”

“Just stating the facts.”

“You’re looking to get a spanking,” Jack warns. “Is that what you want?”

You grin to yourself, making sure to hide your face from Jack. “No,” you say, not very convincingly.

He laughs a bit. “You’re not very good at this.”

“You’re not giving me any incentive to be good.” You’re really pushing it today, but it’s all in good fun. Jack’s not going to react badly to your fighting– he never does. Sure, he’ll dom you and he’ll get pissed off, but he always reacts appropriately. He gives you your comeuppance when you deserve it.

Jack’s hand falls on your ass. It stings a bit, but you like it. You wiggle back and bury your face in the pillow, arching your back so Jack is even more enticed by the view.

“Oh, baby, you’re getting greedy,” Jack teases. “You can’t just present yourself and expect me to fall for it. Ask me for more.”

You groan, frustrated. To be fair, you’d been denying him earlier by shuttering your legs and trapping him inside, then giggling as he admonished you, so this is completely fair for Jack. He’s allowed to tease a little and deny you.

“Fuck me?” You request sweetly, putting on a voice that Jack will fall for.

He spanks you again. “Do you deserve that?”

You roll your eyes. Annoying. “Will you put your fingers in me? Wanna be full, Jack.”

“No, I think you’ve gotten enough of my fingers today…”

“Jack,” you complain.

“Mhm,” Jack hums, rubbing his hands over your behind. He’s clutching at your skin, squeezing the handfuls on his palms. “Third time’s a charm?”

“Whatever you want,” you bargain. “Please. I’ll take whatever you want.”

Jack pauses, suspending your breath for a moment before he starts to touch you again. “Good,” he murmurs. He spanks you once more before pulling your hips back into his front and grinding himself against you. “Good choice.”

#puck-luck's 1k celebration #andy writes anything🍄#jack hughes #jack hughes smut #jack hughes fanfiction #jack hughes blurb #jh86 #nhl smut #nhl fanfiction #nhl blurb #hockey smut

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soobibabe · 6 months ago

Text

MOA bitchFUL era 6 members - 6 active

yeonjun: GUYS SOMEONE GOT FUCKING PRoPOSED TO INFRONT OF ME yeonjun changed group's name to "moa bitchFUL era"

taehyun: thats nice. good for them. yeonjun: AT SEND OFF? ??? I THOUGHT MOAS WERE LIKE US??? you: bitchless? yeonjun: YES? WHAT HAPPENED TO TOGETHERNESS? kai: no you've got a point

soobin: that's crazy me personally if someone proposed to me in front of bebe rexha I would looking at them with a blank expression and ask "who dis?" ngl beomgyu: don't speak, peasant soobin: ? you: what's up with you two? kai: soobins is in another dating scandal with the same guy as last time and beomgyus mad because (a) soobin didn't deny it (b) he didn't tell any of us and (c) the week prior, they were on another bromance trip again :3

yeonjun: ik its pride month, and I'm happy for you beomgyu or condolences BUT WE AS A COLLECTIVE NEED TO PREPARE FOR DISASTER! CRISIS! SSSSOOOSSS beomgyu: kys soobin: im NOT dating Seonghwa, Q, Keonhee or Zhang Hao guys ^.^ kai: WHORE why do you remember all their names you: exactly!!! why do you have other friends Choi Soobin?????? beomgyu: oh but when I say it I'm gay huh 😒 yeonjun: HELLOou*oo))000? ARE WE JUST GOING TO IGnORE THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM? MOA NO BITCHLESS ERA??? beomgyu: you're an elephant in the room taehyun: Oh, dear god. I fear you may actually be onto something yeonjun. What if we lose our fanbase? Should I start posting thirst traps again? Guys seriously. you: NO 🙅‍♀️🚫🙅‍♀️🙅‍♀️ we cannot go back to the dark ages PLSLLSLLSLS those tik tok posting schedules era was BRUTAL

yeonjun: Taehyun I love your big sexy wrinkled brain please don't change no jungkook kai: remember that time Namjoon exposed tyun for his JK wallpaper LMAOOOOOOOOOO taehyun: huening kai. kai: apologies. sorrows. soobin: oh my god no yeah pls TAEHYUN U ARE SO RIGHT y/n start first!!! guys!! this is an emergency!!!!!!!!!!!!! you: SHUTUTUT UPPUPPUPU yeonjun: Hes right, youre our main visual

beomgyu: guys if MOA start marrying each other does that mean no more fan service? if so I say lets support the movement!!! SICK and TIRED of seeing those "Y/N MARRY ME" comments on my welives soobin: hey I comment those taehyun: ??? you: well yeonjun: this reminds me of that one time I was on tik tok and a yeonjun x y/n imagine came up about us getting married and leaving txt OH MY GOD WAS THAT GOD FORESHADOWING kai: since when did you believe in god??? yeonjun: GUYS WHAT IF MOAS GETTING MARRIED ACTUALLY MEANS THAT Y/N AND I ARE GETTING MARRIED AND WE'LL LIVE HAPPILY E VER AFTER AND TXT WILL NOT GO EXTINCT AND WE KISS AND WE HOLD HANDS AND ONE DAY WE FALL INLOVE DEADASS AND HAVE 3 KIDS AND WE LIVE TOGETHER FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES AND RAISE LITTLE MODEL FASHION BABIES I CAN STYLE AND THEYD HAVE SUCH GOOD GENES DO YOU SEE THE VISION

beomgyu kicked yeonjun from moa bitchFULL era beomgyu: now that that's over, how about we go get ice cream? taehyun: sure. kai: ICE CREAM >>>.<<< ^////^

soobin: can we add him back i kinda like when he's off his hinges wait yes we can because I'm the leader and I say so HAHA soobin added yeonjun to moa bitchFUL era yeonjun: thanks soobin soobin did you know that I love you you know soobin? soobin kicked yeonjun from moa bitchFUL era soobin: boy wth was that you added yeonjun to moa bitchFUL era you: guys what if I said i have a long term low maintenance long distance low commitment casual boyfriend

you left moa bitchFUL era kai: ????? soobin: there's a g*n in my mouth actually yeonjun: did I just get cheated on? taehyun: wasn't I the long term low maintenance low commitment casual bf? wdym long distance?? kai: ????? x2 beomgyu: ☹️☹️?? I THOUGHT WE WERE SOULMATES?? soobin: ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

A/N: they’re all a little insane in today’s ep. sorry!

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fivesmannequinwife · 3 months ago

Text

My biggest beef with S4' treatment of Five is that it gave me what I wanted in exactly the way that I DID NOT WANT IT.

I wanted Five to be able to settle down and enjoy a slower life at least for a little while, BUT NOT BY BEING TRAPPED WITH HIS BROTHER'S WIFE

I wanted Five to fall in love with a real woman, BUT NOT WITH HIS BROTHER'S WIFE

I wanted to see a softer, more tender side of Five that we all know he always had but couldn't access because of survival, BUT I DIDN'T WANT TO SEE IT WITH HIS BROTHER'S WIFE

I wanted Five to put a bit of his own happiness above his family's, BUT NOT BY STRAIGHT UP SCREWING HIS BROTHER'S WIFE AND BEING WILLING TO DESTROY HIS BROTHER'S FAMILY

I want to hate seeing Five acting like that because it's so messed up that it's with Lila, and because it's so ooc for him to betray Diego like that after his whole motivation being his love for his family all the time. He faced numerous apocalupses and a lifetime of torment to save them and go back to them. I want to hate it all but I can't do it fully because they finally gave Five a little peace and happiness...

It would be so cute and perfect if it had been with literally anyone else that wasn't family.

Explain to me WHY couldn't Five just find someone else? Literally just bring Dolores to life by making him meet an alternate timeline version of her where she's a real woman very early on his time trapped in the subway. Make her go along with Five and Lila and trap the 3 of them in the subway. Make the exact same scenes we saw except that it's this new woman instead of Lila and Lila just silently watches from afar with sadness because she realizes she missed HER HUSBAND. That's it.

Most fans wouldn't even be mad at the lack of development because it's pretty established already that Five had a relationship with the mannequin.

Hell, if they didn't want to make it "weird" by bringing Dolores to life, ANY OTHER LIVING WOMAN WOULD DO. Just ANYONE.

And ik Five technicallh didn't "need" a romantic love story. Ik. But I wanted him to have it because, to me, it was obvious since S1 that his FEELINGS for the mannequin were real, and to her, he projected that tender and softer side of him. He hallucinated her as a real woman during S3, very similarly to how he most likely did during his worst mental state moments during the apocalypse. He seemed sad on Luther's wedding, like a part of him wanted to have that, too. He explicitly says in S3 he wants retirement and to settle down and having a partner to do that with sounds pretty reasonable and relatable. He wanted that connection and love, which is absolutely understandable considering he's an old man.

Just... that whole thing could have been my favorite part of S4, had they just used any other character that was not already part of the family. Idec who, just not a family member...

#the umbrella academy #tua #five hargreeves #umbrella academy #five x dolores #five tua #tua season 4 #lila hargreeves #lila pitts #diego hargreeves #the umbrella academy season 4 #tua s4

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thepersonperson · 4 months ago

Text

The Reproductive Horror of JJK Part 1 (The Loss of Bodily Autonomy)

Part 2

Notes before we start.

1) This analysis deals heavily with topics of nonconsent, grooming, abuse, reproductive manipulation, and pregnancy. Please proceed with caution.

2) This post was inspired by @hermitw

3) I will be mainly using the TCB scans for the manga because of their accessibility.

4) Written as of JJK 265.

(Click images for captions/citations.)

Preface

This was written with the assumption you've also read these other analyses:

Thoughts on Sukuna and Kenjaku’s relationship as of JJK 258.

Please give it a quick glance at least.

Quiet Horror

Jujutsu Kaisen is a unique piece of horror writing to me because the most upsetting aspects rely almost entirely on implication. Immensely triggering topics such as sexual abuse and rape are never shown, only implied. I personally have difficulty consuming/cannot consume media that depicts these kinds of things graphically, which is why JJK’s framing of it intrigues me. Rather than being sent into a panic, I find myself deeply unnerved. I’ve decided to call this “quiet horror” since I don’t know how else to describe it.

The quiet horror of JJK has been there since the start—the dehumanization, the loss of autonomy, the idea someone’s body does not belong to them and therefore ok to use… It’s right there in your face starting with Yuji becoming Sukuna’s vessel. But the horror is not just that those things occur, it’s that hardly anyone recognizes this as a problem.

These insidious ideas are persistent across the narrative and accepted. And its primary victims are the female characters.

Misogyny

The fascinating thing about misogyny in JJK is how it is rarely outright depicted. Characters will talk about generational abuse spawned by it, but we never actually see it in action until Naoya. And even that is mostly implied.

That’s how it is in real life too. When people experience overt misogyny, it’s often when they’re isolated. For example a family gathering where the men leer at girls and say horrendous things is witnessed by only those attending. If one was never around this, the only way they’re made aware of it is by a victim discussing it.

And this is exactly what happens with the Zenins.

What’s troubling about this exchange is Momo laying out everything wrong with systemic misogyny and that’s it. She offers no solution to it because she has none. Nobara is told, this is reality and you need to accept it.

Mai falls into the same defeatist trappings, angry at Maki for trying to do something about it.

You can’t really hold this against her. She’s been abused to an extent Maki wasn’t aware of and Maki is the only person Mai can lash out at without consequence.

To be clear, it is heavily implied that Naoya molested her. Some of the first words out of his mouth are him sexualizing his underage cousins. And later as a curse, he taunts Maki for being an adult with Mai.

It’s easy to dismiss this as Naoya mocking Mai for not reaching adulthood. However, Mai has incestuous thoughts about Megumi and Maki (seeing them as her first crushes per the fanbook), which can be a very unfortunate side effect experienced by incest victims (huge content warning for the linked source). Combine that with the knowledge of Naoya’s earlier sexualization and the implication is heavy.

Mai’s abuse is not the only one framed this way. Naoya’s mother is without a face or name. The only hint of her abuse is the word いっぱい (ippai) which means many. Naoya has many older siblings who aren’t named. He is the next head before Gojo’s sealing due to his Cursed Technique (CT) being the same as his father’s. From this it can be inferred his mother was treated like livestock and used by Naobito until she produced a worthy heir.

Rika’s character profile is included here because her story is much like Mai’s—her abuse at the hands of her father is heavily implied. Her intense dislike of older men, being aware of predatory gazes as a child, and even using that for manipulation—these are all traits child victims of sexual assault may display (huge content warning for the linked source).

It’s hard to pick up on these things unless you’re in the know. But it is there and it is consistent. …And most of the cast doesn’t do much about it. Maki and Rika are different in that regard. They react to these transgressions violently, killing their abusers (and in Maki’s case the enablers too). Neither of them are in the wrong for doing so. It’s just really sad that they had to take matters into their own hands because no one else would stop it.

Hidden in Plain Sight

The misogyny female characters experience is very subdued and never graphic. Creepy behavior towards them is never shown outright, it’s all implied. We don’t see Naoya leer at Mai, we hear him discuss her figure in her absence. (I think that’s what helps make this less triggering. We don’t have to see them be victimized.) The same cannot be said of the male characters.

Ui Ui is a character that makes most people extremely uncomfortable because the grooming he experiences is in your face, pedophilic, and incestuous. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that as a ruthless capitalist, Mei Mei exploits her brother this way for the sake of money.

Through warped affection she has convinced a child that his body belongs to her and that he is only to use it for her.

What makes this situation go from bad to worse is that everyone around them just tolerates it. The most opposition we see to this relationship is Yuji side eyeing them. Otherwise people are more than happy to look the other way and even enable it by paying for their services.

This contradiction is especially glaring when it comes to Gojo, who very much is against the enjoyment of youth to be stolen away from his students. Why does Gojo pay for and tolerate this woman who is very clearly preying on her brother? Is it because Ui Ui seems happy with situation?

Well, I think it’s because he’s used to it too.

To acknowledge that what Mei Mei is doing as wrong and intervening would be admitting to himself that he was taken advantage of as a child. It’s not like it killed him, you know? He’s strong and he’s beautiful. Everyone wants him for his body. That’s just how things work.

In the fanbook Gege says that Gojo can never be fully honest with a woman. And that is a response to the question: “He (Gojo) seems to be aware of his own handsomeness, does he want to have a partner?”

It’s a bit concerning that Gojo is avoidant with women while having a history of them attempting to prey on him as a child. It doesn't help that in the Gojo Booklet interview, Gege reveals that Gojo would apparently be a sugar baby to someone much older than him if he didn't have to be a sorcerer.

The framing of these scenes as comedic is very uncomfortable. It’s a bit too similar to how male victims are portrayed in real life too. I’m not sure if this is intentional on Gege’s part, but regardless the result for me is horror. These terrible things are happening and nothing is being done about it.

Ui Ui and Gojo are taken advantage of by these adults because of what their bodies can do for them. This is a recurring theme in JJK not much different from how the women and girls are treated by the men of the Zenins. All of this stems from dehumanization that results in objectification.

I’ve said before that Gojo and Sukuna are twin flames. And in this aspect they’re very similar I think. Something awful happened to Sukuna right in our faces and most of the readerbase didn’t take it seriously because he’s The Strongest and a man.

This is sexual assault point blank. A naked person forcibly put her body against Sukuna and he didn’t want that to happen. And just like everyone else, Yorozu did this because she wants Sukuna’s body for herself.

It’s framed like a joke, but the horror persists. Sukuna is going catatonic here in part because losing means entering a marriage he has no interest in. The implication here is distressing—Sukuna sees this as losing his bodily autonomy and being raped for the rest of his life. Likening that to death is understandable.

Hopefully you can see the pattern now. Sexual assault and exploitation is commonplace in JJK. It’s just subtle enough to make people vaguely uncomfortable without making them realize it’s ongoing theme. That’s the quiet horror of JJK.

The Dehumanization of Vessels

Vessels represent everything that makes my skin crawl in JJK. Someone’s body no longer belongs to themself—it’s a thing, a container that is for someone else to use. They aren’t even afforded the dignity of their name most of the time, being referred to as Someone’s Vessel by others.

Itadori Yuji

It goes without saying, Yuji’s dehumanization is the most blatant. He’s called Sukuna’s Vessel by most of the people around him and slated to be executed for the crime of existing as it. The other teenagers around his age are taught this dehumanization by those much older than him.

It’s absurd. Despite Yuji being born with and living in this body of his for 15 years, it’s suddenly not his. All because Sukuna “tainted” it.

And look at this declaration from Uraume: “Whose body do you think that is?!”

They phrase this as if it was never Yuji’s to begin with.

On some level that is true, Kenjaku created Yuji to be the perfect cage for Sukuna. Uraume didn’t know that the time Yuji was literally bred into existence by Kenjaku to be a tool, but it’s interesting nonetheless. It’s even more interesting that Kenjaku is not the only one guilty of claiming a child’s body from birth for use by an adult. Tegen has a whole bloodline that gives them vessels for consumption.

Star Plasma Vessels

Amanai Riko is introduced as The Star Plasma Vessel while naked in a tub. Symbolically this is striking—she is a blank slate that can only be projected onto. Clothing reflects a person’s lifestyle, personality, and tastes. Riko being denied this in her introduction demonstrates her lack of autonomy.

And just like how the Kyoto kids were groomed into dehumanizing Yuji, she is groomed into dehumanizing herself by the adults around her. It’s ok that she’s a vessel and someone else will use her body to live because it’s for the greater good.

Those aren’t her true feelings though. Deep down she wants to have her body and her life. And an adult still winds up taking that away from her.

Isn’t it interesting how Gojo does this same song and dance to himself as The Strongest? Knowing this history and his adamancy towards Yuji’s autonomy (especially in the light novels) is all the more heart wrenching.

But this didn’t start with Yuji, it started with Riko. …on Tengen’s orders.

It’s strange that the individual taking away the lives of hand-picked young girls would be this considerate, right?

JJK never tries to frame characters as completely evil at all times. I appreciate that because it makes depictions of abuse far more realistic. We don’t see Naobito abuse his wife or enable Naoya, we see him half-drunk fighting like a pro without openly antagonizing Maki. If you didn’t know about the Zenin Clan, he’d just be a funny old man. This dichotomy is often why abuse victims aren’t believed. The people they tell only know the good side. And someone who is capable of that goodness can’t possibly be that bad.

It’s the same way for Tengen. They’re not a creep that salivates over young girls, they’re a calm and reasonable individual who has convinced themself and many others that these actions are necessary. Yuki is the only person that calls them out for how screwed up this all is.

Before Gojo, she was The Strongest. And before Riko, she was the Star Plasma Vessel. Her body and her life was going to be given away in service to someone much older than her under the guise of a necessary evil perpetuated by religion. She rejected that and escaped her fate by becoming uncontrollably strong.

Yuki has every right to be this angry. What Tengen is doing is very messed up. All kinds of excuses and softenings are made for them, but in the end they are using the bodies of young girls to sustain themself. That’s why it’s all the more horrifying that these girls’ souls are still present and coherent enough to speak.

I really like that Yuki won’t let Tengen know what they’re saying. She’s right to assume that Tengen will just excuse whatever comes from it. However, the fact she’s this angry implies those voices aren’t anything pleasant.

Incarnation

The horror of being trapped in a body that no longer belongs to you doesn’t just exist for Tengen’s Plasma Star Vessels, it’s the very foundation of Kenjaku’s vessel incarnation. Which of them came up with this idea is first unknown. They ultimately do the same things to vessels but for very different reasons.

Incarnation works on two layers of screwed up:

1) The host’s soul is suppressed to the point where the invader cannot detect them.

2) It’s next to impossible to return them to who they were once before.

Following the quiet themes around sexual assault, this bears an uncanny resemblance to victims dealing with the aftermath of such an event. Your body no longer feels like it belongs to you, becoming invisible to those who favor the perpetrator, forever tainted after being used by another.

And following the quiet themes around misogyny, this becomes reproductive horror. A body stripped of autonomy and permanently changed after being forced to give someone else new life—Incarnation is a visceral depiction of forced pregnancies.

Pregnancy Horror (Kenjaku)

I think it’s deliberate that mothers in JJK are hardly given faces or names. That’s all a misogynistic society wants them for anyways. Their bodies are to produce someone worthwhile. A tool for those in power to use for their own ends.

Our first introduction to this is Kamo’s mother, who despite playing a central role in his life, remains unnamed. She gives birth to a worthy heir of the Kamo Clan and is immediately discarded.

Thankfully Kamo eventually abandons his clan in favor of supporting his mother. Learning a hard lesson from Maki, he seems to conclude that clans existing through misogynistic practices cannot be reformed into a place for women.

And this misogyny of the Kamo Clan’s is historical. Enough for Kenjaku to take the place of Meiji-era Kamo Notoroshi to commit the most heinous sexual abuses known so far. And despite this history, the modern Kamo Notoroshi is named after him. Another awful secret known by those in power that is never fully condemned since they ultimately benefit from treating women like broodmares.

Death Painting Wombs

The Kamo Clan’s greatest sin is the coverup of Kenjaku’s actions as Kamo Notoroshi. I’ll be going much more into depth with its severity, be warned.

We’ll start with the facts. The faceless and nameless mother of Choso and his 9 brothers was raped by Kenjaku and a cursed spirit 9 times and had those fetuses aborted 9 times.

I’ve been on about the loss of bodily autonomy so I’ll be focusing on the abortion process itself. Historical abortions were incredibly dangerous things. Though they varied by region, a lot of the methodology converges.

I will quote the favored methods in historical Japan directly from this article:

“Natural methods included drinking poisonous substances or herbal concoctions, all of which lacked a scientific basis. Many had adverse effects. Other means included acupuncture, cold water immersion, and vaginally inserting sharp objects such as burdock roots to break the amniotic sack.”

Kenjaku is someone that does not care about others’ suffering since everyone is just a thing to be played with. I doubt the victims of these experiments were offered any pain relief. Choso’s mother was made to endure one of these methods 9 times.

When Mahito feeds one of the fetuses to a man, we can see that it is slightly smaller than their palm. Here’s a helpful guide for the size of a fetus by week based on the size of a fruit.

I think a lime or lemon best represents the size and shape. A palm sized fetus is somewhere around 12–16 weeks old. Methods that involve inducing a miscarriage via ingesting medicine or poison decrease drastically after 8–12 weeks. (I’m basing this off the abortion pill that actually works.)

Kenjaku wanted to make sure the fetuses remained intact, so inducing a miscarriage by puncturing the amniotic sac to trigger labor-like contractions was most likely the chosen method. I’m not sure if Kenjaku can use Reversed Cursed Technique (RCT) on others to heal them, but that would allow for C-sections to be possible too.

It takes several weeks or months to become pregnant again after a miscarriage. Let’s standardize this as a range of 2–24 weeks. (Based on the earliest known conception at 2 weeks and the recommended conception time of 6 months.) Choso’s mother endured this without pain management 9 times.

12–16 weeks of pregnancy.

2–24 weeks for conception.

9 Times.

She endured these rapes and abortions ranging anywhere from 126–360 weeks or 2.4–6.9 years.

I’m harping on this point because unless you know the details, this bit gets glossed over. The struggles of those who are pregnant both willingly and not are often downplayed or kept out of sight. Whatever symptoms she had for the first trimester of pregnancy (0-12 weeks) were repeated without support and knowing it was to be terminated 9 times over.

Here is a list of possible symptoms for the first trimester from the Cleveland Clinic.

Sore Breasts

Nausea: "Morning sickness is one of the telltale signs of early pregnancy. Despite its name, it can last all day and all night."

Mood Swings: "The sudden rush of hormones may put you on a rollercoaster of emotions. You may alternate between feeling anxious or scared to excited or weepy within a span of 30 minutes. It may be helpful to talk through your feelings with a friend or your partner.

Fatigue

Frequent Urination: "Your uterus begins to grow to support the pregnancy. It may begin pressing on your bladder, causing you to need to pee more often."

Acne or Other Skin Changes

Mild Shortness of Breath

I do not blame Choso for only referring to this as Kenjaku toying with his mother. The full breadth of her suffering is not something her child should have to bear.

Kenjaku repeats a similar kind of trauma for every incarnation born of a human made to swallow an object. Their bodies don’t belong to them anymore—they’re just hosts to the life of someone they never wanted to have.

To what extent the incarnated know they will be inflicting this harm on others is unknown. It’s just very uncomfortable knowing that Kenjaku created this method in a way that makes the violation of bodies mandatory.

Tengen

This obsession with forcing pregnancies onto others does not end with incarnation or the death painting wombs. Kenjaku’s absorption of Tengen is a culmination of these experiments.

Tengen is turned into a pregnancy. Who we’ve established to be hosting a mass of young girl’s bodies. The yonic imagery is incredibly overt for this process.

Tengen is put into a womb that resembles a vagina before becoming a fetus. Kenjaku’s Domain Expansion (DE) contains the literal decapitated heads of the pregnant. (More faceless women being used for their bodies.)

The DE name itself refers to Garbhadhatu which is the Womb Realm in Buddhism. You could translate this as all-enveloping womb.

What this symbolically means, I have no idea. There is, however, a consistent, misogynistic disregard for consent and the bodies of those who can bear children when it comes to Kenjaku. And that’s horrifying.

Sukuna

Initially Kenjaku bears the Merger pregnancy using the stolen dead body of Geto Suguru. So even though Kenjaku consents to this pregnancy, the person whose body is being used for this doesn’t get to have a say in it.

But we already know how upsetting that is. We’ve seen how much this has pissed off Gojo Satoru who blames himself for his loved one’s defilement. What’s not being discussed in depth is Sukuna’s being inadvertently made a victim from this.

Sukuna’s fingers, a cursed object explicitly made by Kenjaku, are able to create cursed wombs. Since these fingers were created long before the death painting wombs, it appears that Kenjaku’s first attempts to birth evolved humans started with him.

Note how the finger bearers have 4 eyes, just like Sukuna.

I’ve been over why Kenjaku would target Sukuna and how Sukuna does not desire relationships or progeny and how his strength has prevented Kenjaku from forcing that on him directly. What I’m trying to draw attention to is how this appears to be the start of Kenjaku trying to workaround his boundaries without getting killed.

Knowing the extent to which Kenjaku is willing to turn others’ bodies into breeding stock makes the fact Sukuna’s fingers are essentially capable of birthing powerful curses very alarming.

Kenjaku didn’t stop there. The binding vow between them was still made to produce these cursed objects and the context of its formation is still missing. The other culling game players make it very clear Kenjaku either manipulated or tricked them into becoming cursed objects. There is not a single named character Kenjaku didn’t betray in some fashion after misleading them with false promises.

For Sukuna, Yuji being a cage instead of a vessel already indicated Kenjaku was not being honest with him. I think there’s more to it than that though. The details of the Merger and what activates it are something Sukuna and Uraume do not fully understand. Kenjaku tries to explain a little bit to them, but they both shut it down.

And without knowing the full breadth or implication of their binding vow, I don’t think Sukuna expected to be forced into a pregnancy that requires birthing.

I appreciate that Sukuna falls victim to this manipulation despite being the strongest. It goes to show that anyone can experience the loss of bodily autonomy.

Itadori Jin & Kaori

His identical twin is not spared of this reproductive manipulation either. Jin is manipulated into having a child with the corpse of his wife who is piloted by Kenjaku. But I want to take the time to give Kaori the dignity Kenjaku has denied her.

Even if Kaori wanted a child, there is no meaningful way for her to consent to this pregnancy. I’m not even sure if Jin fully understood there was someone else wearing Kaori’s body. There is a real possibility she didn’t want a child to begin with. We just don’t know since everyone except her gets to discuss it.

She’s exactly like Choso’s mother here. Her body no longer belongs to her and she has no spoken dialogue. Her personhood is denied on introduction. What she was like or what things she aspired to is treated as irrelevant—she’s just another woman Kenjaku used and discarded like a tool.

Visceral Femininity

Bloodborne is a game about. Well it’s a game that happens at you. There is little plot or reason to the Lovecraftian horrors that drive you and the characters mad. But when you examine the fragments of lore hidden both in plain sight and on item descriptions…you go insane.

There are patterns though. Seemingly unrelated pieces of this ethereal puzzle can be stitched together with a keen eye. Someone made a video on it and concluded it was about motherhood.

After watching this perspective, this reading seems obvious. With all the disjointed umbilical cords, births, abortions, and blood. It’s a proper reproductive horror.

To me, JJK resembles Bloodborne in that way. And after I was granted the eyes to see, I’ve noticed that this body horror has been here as early as JJK 0.

In fact JJK 0 and first chapter feature female characters being groped by curses. (Sometimes the word Geto uses for violated can be translated as rape.)

Motherhood, and everything that causes it, is something JJK uses as a vehicle to discuss the undiscussable—bodily autonomy and its loss for exploitation. Rather than presenting it as something we’re familiar with, it’s a symbolic, pervasive theme in how the bodies of others are seen as tools for those in power.

The organs and bodies of those who can become pregnant are twisted into things that inflict pain. In the case of Naoya, he quite literally becomes a cunt that torments the surviving twin of the girl he molested.

And his hand sign references a deity who manipulates bodies in the womb, changing females to males.

It’s never quite stated outright or even properly addressed by the characters, but you still feel that sickening pit. There’s something fundamentally wrong with the way things are. Why is so little being done about it?

#cactus yaps #I had a very hard time writing this. I feel like I scrub the skin off my skin and the flesh off my bones.#The trigger tag system on Tumblr sucks so I've listed everything out beforehand.#Filing this under posts that make it obvious I watched Elfen Lied at age 12.#jujutsu kaisen #jjk spoilers #jjk meta #zenin mai #amanai riko #kenjaku #tengen #ryomen sukuna

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tojiphile · 1 year ago

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ALL FAIRYTALES HAVE A HAPPY ENDING + GOJO SATORU

a/n. comfort fic. non-canon compliant. slight angst but happy ending of course <3 pre-established relationship with satoru, kissing, cuddling, words of affirmation.

most nights, satoru comes home late. when you first started dating him, it used to worry you. his absence plagued you with thoughts worse than cheating. you’d spend hours wondering if your boyfriend was still safe, praying for him to just be alive.

now, you’ve come to understand—he has a role, a part to play, a cog in the machine that makes the world run, that allows it to survive. still, that didn’t mean you had to like it.

now, on most nights when he’s back home late, you’re able to crawl into your side of the bed, and go to sleep. you stir when he joins you, cuddling up into you and pressing a kiss on your forehead. “you’re home?” you’d sigh into his neck. “i’m home.” he’s reply, whispering sweet nothings in your ear until you fall back asleep.

but tonight is different. you’re not one for superstitions (satoru proves them all wrong), but you can’t help but feel a sick sense of dread in your stomach. something was wrong. you ate dinner alone in front of the tv, flipping through channels. you stopped when you saw the news.

“this just in: shibuya is under attack! as of 7:00pm, shibuya has been placed under lockdown by a mysterious invisible wall. government officials are looking into the situation now. our sources tell us that the civilians trapped are crying for help desperately, all looking for one satoru gojo.”

you freeze.

“if anyone has any information on the situation, please call the hotline below…” the announcer’s words faded away as all your intrusive thoughts raced through your mind, your heart hammering in your chest. where was satoru? was he okay?

hands trembling, you reach for your phone and dial your boyfriend. it rings exactly three and a half times before the call ends. you call again, and again, and again, but he never picks up. so, you ring the only person you can think of—kiyotaka ijichi. satoru might jokingly insult the man sometimes, but all in the times you’ve been worried, kiyotaka had answered your questions, trying his best to remain calm, giving you answers as to where your boyfriend was.

he doesn’t pick up either.

you pace the living room. you know that satoru can handle anything. he was a living reminder of it. even in the times he’d come home, battered and bruised, he’d give you that same cocky grin, pointing his thumb at himself and declaring, “i’m the strongest!”

so you try your best to calm down, breathing deep breaths. whatever this was, satoru would come home. you just have to take a shower, go to bed, and when you wake up, he’ll be right there next to you, warm and inviting.

and you do just that. but as you lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling full of little glow in the dark stars that satoru helped you stick up, you couldn’t fall asleep. this was different somehow, you could feel it.

you return to the living room after pouring yourself a glass of wine. but just as you’re about to sit down, you hear the jingle of keys, a heavy sigh, a click, and the front door swings open.

“i’m home.”

satoru stands in the doorway. he looks too exhausted to move. there’s dried blood on his face and his eyes are glowing a vibrant sky of blue. you drop your of glass of wine, not caring as it shatters to the ground and race to your boyfriend. as you approach him, he finally lets his guard down, eyes returning to their normal hue.

you wrap your arms around him, clasping him tightly as you press your head into his chest. you can’t help the hot tears of relief that spill as you mumble, muffled by his clothes, “welcome home.”

he pulls you in, squeezing you tight, as if he was trying to mould the two of you together so you would never have to leave his side. he hugs you in all his despair, because you were the only reason he still fought.

after suguru passed, satoru lost the will to live. he fought, yes, he fought. but battle after battle, the bloodshed was never worth anything. there was no joy, no happiness because there was no love left to lose. he fought a good fight, but if he had lost, he would have stopped fighting.

but now, here, with you in front of him, holding onto him like he’s everything you’ve ever needed packed into a man-sized box, he knows that in your eyes, he’s more than just a figure of greatness. gojo satoru is simply a man who has wants and needs and flaws and feelings.

so for you, who sees him for him, he fights. everyday, he fights to come back home to you, to take you in his arms and hold you tight. he wants to press his body against yours and feel your warmth, and he doesn’t want to let it go even as he sees the morning light.

he kisses the top of your head and whispers, “i promised you i’d come home. i don’t break my promises. and after all…”

you can feel him smile into your head, “i am the strongest.”

(extra:

at his cheeky comment, you give him a firm whack on his buttocks, and he yelps in surprise, pulling away from you.

“mean!” he pouts, “i just got back from a long fight and won against the king of curses! shouldn’t you, my lovely girlfriend, be taking care of me?”

you shoot him a glare. “i thought you died! don’t play around at a time like this!”

he chuckles, “aw, was my poor baby worried about me?”

satoru wraps you up in another an embrace, but as you’re about to return he hug, you let out a yelp as he throws you over his shoulder and says, “let me take care of you now!”

you try to squirm out of his grip, but he’s holding onto your waist tightly. you can only see his ass from this point of view but you yell at him anyway, “i hate you!”

a smile. “i love you too.”)

#tojiphile #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen comfort #jujutsu kaisen angst #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru comfort #jjk

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romanarose · 3 months ago

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Please, Mr. Miller?

Header by and the fic dedicated to @sweetlummie . Thank you for supporting this series

Dividers by @anitalenia

DBF!Joel x Reader

Join my taglist : Masterlist

Buy Me A Coffee : Kofi : Go Fund Me

First installment is Yes, Mr. Miller? but all parts can be found on my masterlist <3

Summery: Getting ready for the labor day cookout, you reminisce on Labor day last year when things with Joel began. Ft. your dad surprises you

Warnings: Virginity loss, dirty talk, PIV sex, age gap (legal, reader is over 21 so stfu y'all), size kink, bleeding from sex (I know theres been discourse over the whole bleeding your first time, but I bled soooo. It's a normal thing to happen, don't be embarrassed.) Joel is a bit of a pain slut what can I say, reader scratching Joel enough to make him bleed,

Immersivity: Reader is fem, afab, dresses v hyperfem and cutsie, reader is shorter than Joel and coded that Joel is larger, can carry you.

A/N: My last instalment for this series, the dbf holiday fucks series as I call it, caused a whole hoopla. I didn't do memorial day nor forth of july as planned. I wasn't even going to do any more but then I thought of everyone who supported me and of course my dear Lum, and decided to write one more installment. This will wrap up the series with a happy end for our dear horny bastards <3

Everything needed to be perfect. Joel was coming over for the yearly labor day cookout your dad did to celebrate the end of the summer, and oh what a summer it was!! Joel had made this time after gradating college special, spending time taking you out of town so you could both not worry about getting caught. You even had another threesome with him and Tommy, a time that was extra special now that you belonged to Joel officially.

This wouldn't be your anniversary technically. Labor Day always falls on Monday, but your anniversary was the same date of course. You spent the "anniversary" of the first time Joel and you had sex getting fucked into oblivion at Joel's house. Today was still special, because you and him would always remember Labor Day for this.

As you apply your simple make-up, pink eyeshadow and pink blush and pink lipstick to match the dress you brought over to your dads, you think back on that day.

You had been giving Joel 'fuck me' eyes for months. Ever since him and your dad became friends the last year or so, you can't deny how much you wanted him. The barrier, however, was obvious. He was your dads best friend, and then there was the fact you were a virgin.

Still, your record wasn't exactly lily white. You'd fucked around a bit here and there with boys and girls but that was the problem. They were all just like you, inexperienced. Most were boring, most only focused on what they wanted. You need a grown ass man to teach you, to guide you, to make you cum the way your vibrator could.

Joel was that man. So, you spent months sending signals...

Signals that ended up with you pushed up against your bedroom door that fateful Monday while your dad fell asleep on the couch, his body crowding you with his breath hot against your face.

"You think you are awfully cute, don't you little lady?"

You can't help smile at that. Yes, yes you do think you're cute, thank you.

"You just think you can prance around here in these little skirts and lowcut tops and get me hard like a fucking teenager not have any consiquences?"

Despite his words and harsh tone, when Joel's hand went to your hip his grip was light, letting you know you weren't being trapped.

You look up at him. "I know what I'm about, Mr. Miller."

A small smile appears on his face, and he grind his hips against your stomach, making you feel him growing erection. "You feel what you do to me?" He waits until you nod. "I think it's only right you help me take care of it, don't you? Or do I have to fuck my fist in the shower thinking of your face again?"

"No, Mr. Miller, I think I should help you, but... you have to help me with something..." You trail off, uncertain how he'll take the news.

"And what is that?"

"I'm a virgin..."

With this piece of information, Joel's face softens and he gives you a little more space. He seems like a new person, resting his head on your forehead and you see him cringing a bit.

"Shit darl'n, "m sorry. I was come'n in strong for no fucking reasons"

But you don't want him to feel bad for assuming you weren't a virgin, most people aren't by your age... "No, no don't be sorry! I... I liked it." Joel opens his eyes to look at you, your faces so close together. "i like you being dominate."

That smile again... that damn smile and you knew you were in trouble.

"You want this? You can say no, any time..."

"I do. I really fucking do."

With that, Joel kissed you... and oh what a kiss it was. Joel devoured you like this betrayal of his friendship was sending him to death row and you were his request for a last meal. He kissed you like he was willing to sacrifice it all just for your lips, that committing this sin was worth it just to be the first between your legs. He kissed you like you were his already. Joel never stopped kissing you like that, not even a year into the affair.

He took his time with you, just like you knew he would. This, this is why you trusted Joel Miller with this part of yourself. Your vibrator was at your apartment, but Joel made you cum on his lips, humping the mattress with his arms locked around your shaking legs. Then, he opened you up on his fingers, the thick digits easily maneuvering in and out of your drenched pussy before curling them up and dragging another orgasm out of you.

When Joel finally lined himself up between your legs, your pretty dress still on and the skirt flared out at the bed sheets, he tucked his face to your neck, kissing and nipping softly to not leave and marks. "Are you sure you want this, darl'n? We can stop. I promise."

But you didn't want to stop. No part of you wanted to stop.

You grab at his ass, your done up nails gripping his asscheeks. Your body felt on fire, burning for him and only for him. You knew this could never be a one time things, even before he deflowered you, you were his to keep, his to play with. "Please, Mr. Miller?" You begin to beg for him. "I need your cock, please, please, please? I need it so badly, it's all I want, I need you, only you!"

Joel groaned at the honorific, head dropping down at he began to slid into your tight hole, splitting you open. "Shiiiiiiit baby... s'fucking good... so fucking good."

Your grip on his ass tightened as the pain of being stretched peaked, nails digging in and scrapping him, making him bleed for you as you did for him.

When he's fully seated inside you, Joel plants a little kiss on your lips, humming a little in the back of his throat. "My sweet girl... saved herself just for me, huh?"

"Yes" You lie a little. For the bit. "Wanted you to be my first, Mr. Miller."

He groans, slowly pulling out almost all the way. "Love it when you call me that." then, he thrusts himself completely into you, pounding your pussy as the gentle uh, uh, uh's begin to fill the room in time the the pleasure he brings you.

"Shhhhh princess," Joel's nose nuzzles your cheek. "Gotta be quiet, remember? Can't have your daddy finding out you let his friend deflower his little girl, hm?"

You whimper at that, the secrecy, the naughty air adding to the sin happening in your old bedroom as he thrust again and again and again until you're unable to keep quiet anymore. The pleasure is too great, too strong as your orgasm approaches and he knows it. Gentle hand a contrast the the way he cock is rearranging your insides with pound ferver, Joel cups your face and puts his thumb to your lip.

No hesitation, you open your mouth and as soon as his thumb slides inside you lock your lips around him.

"Good girl... good- fuck- good fucking girl... just needed someth'n to keep your mouth busy, huh? Something to suck on? Yeah, I know baby, I know, it's a lot isn't it? It hurts a little, huh?" Joel looks down, watching the way his cock disappears into you, watching how it comes out covered in slick. He likes looking at you writhe under him, struggling to take it all... "Awwww big stretch.... That's it baby, suck on my thumb... harder, want yuh to practice for my cock, because i ain't done with yuh after tonight. You know that, don't you? You're mine, pretty girl. I'm your daddy now."

He can feel you tightening, your cunt beginning to pulse the same it did around his fingers.

"Bite down on my thumb when you cum baby, make it hurt."

You do as you're told, biting down to prevent from screaming as you cum on his cock, waves of pleasure rushing your body like the crash of the ocean on a rock. Not holding bad, you bit him to the bone and watch as his head rolls back as he cums, reveling in the pain as he floods your cunt with his spend. Again and again he fucks his cum inside your pussy, feeling it begin to leak out and down your ass crack before his softening cock finally still inside you.

There is a moment when Joel body falls on your, covering you with a blanket of just him pressed on your dress, that you think he's just going to get up and walk out. Maybe he's wake your dad up to say goodbye and then just not speak to you again now that he got what he wanted...

But he doesn't. Joel kisses you, saying he'll be right back before getting his pants on again and going to the bathroom. He returned to clean you up, calming your embarrassment when you see the blood on the sheets, and holding you until you fell asleep.

That was one year ago.

Today, you skip down the stairs at your dads,m pink dress fluttering around your knees, and hope happily outside to where you dad was grilling. A few people had trickled in, but were talking across the yard.

"Hi dad!" You start surveying the party goers, looking out over the yard. You don't see Joel yet, but Tommy is in the pool already which means Joel is probably stuck carrying in whatever they brought.

"Hi honey!" He greets you warmly. "That a new dress?"

You give a twirl. "Sure is!"

"Looks real nice, I always liked pink on you. I think Joel will like it too."

Your blood runs cold and you freeze. You don't even have it in you to act natural or confused, you just stare at him in shock. You wonder if he's about to start yelling, although that was rarely in his nature.

"I..."

Your dad smiles at you, adding cheese to a few burgers. "Relax, honey, it's fine. I saw your car at Joel's house back in May. Yuh ain't slick." He gives you a wink.

"Oh...." You say dumbly, unsure what else to say. "Are you... mad?"

"I was a little when I first saw it... but mostly because you guys didn't tell me. Then I thought about it and realized you guys were probably nervous. I figured as long as he's treat'n you right, I'm fine." He cocks an eyebrow. "And he's treating you right, ain't he? Just cause he's my friend don't mean I'm choosing his side."

Tears of relief well up in your eyes. "Yeah daddy, he does. He treats me real good."

"TOMMY!" Joel shouts walking up the driveway, carrying several bags and a cooler. "You couldn't help?!"

You and your dad laugh, and when you sniffle he leaves his grill to give you a hug. "Good. I'm glad. I just want you to be happy, and Joel's a good guy. I'm just glad it's not Tommy."

You laugh again at that, and once he's satisfied you're happy, he goes to putting the burgers on a plate.

"So... is it serious? I don't wanna be in your business, just wondering."

You watch Joel set up the snacks and beer he was specifically told not to bring, but because of who Joel is as a person he brought them anyway. He and Tommy help a kid out of the pool, and when Joel looks up he sees you staring at him from over the deck.

He grins at you and waves. You wave back. "Yeah dad. It's very serious."

You run down the steps to tell him you dont have to sneak around anymore.

If you want more joel with fem reader since this series is done and I'm largly leaving pedro characrters, check out @sweetlummie 's work! lots of v fem cute reader, including great plus size!!

Thank you all for your love on this series!!!! the first part went over 1k notes which is huge for me!!!!

I love you all dearly.

althought im not writng pedro characters as much if you are an enjoyer of my writing, check out my tag list! i got rid of it for a while but am bringing it back

thank you!!!

@fandxmslxt69 @runa-falls @k-ra @ahookedheroespureheart @mikaelak @littlenosoul @stevenandmarcslove @pikapuff-316 @del-ightfulling @faretheeoscar @harriedandharassed @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @campingwiththecharmings @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @milly-louise @casa-boiardi @joeldjarin @mrs-oharaxx @pedge-page @readingiskeepingmegoing @survivingandenduring

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