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#and even then they barely wanted anything to do with the show </3
rvp32 · 3 days
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Heir to the clan's legacy- Chapter 3
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White cum spills out of Yoona's stuffed pussy and your cock is covered in her juices and your seed.
You turn around and smirk.
"Mommy…why don't you clean my cock?"
"Y/N Do you know what the fuck you have just done!" Taeyeon screams as she walks toward you.
The loud scream makes you lose your concentration a little allowing Yoona to escape from your binding
"What have I done, mommy? I fucked Auntie Yoona because she's sexy. I'm an adult. Why are you so mad?"
"I told you specifically not to do any such thing before you left and not only did you go ahead and fuck your aunty and cum inside of her you also had the audacity to call me here," Taeyeon screams
You then turn to Yoona.
"She enjoyed it. Didn't you, mommy" You say smirking, calling Yoona mommy.
Yoona was still recovering from the orgasm and she was also scared but she shyly said, " It was some of the best sex that I have had in a very long time,"
You smirk smiling, but then Taeyeon flash-stepped and you barely reacted since you weren't on guard. You manage to bat her arm away.
"I'm not a kid anymore, mommy…if I want to fuck YoonA. I will."
"Enough, put on your clothes you are coming home with me right now and we will talk about your behavior," Taeyeon says
she then looks to Yoona, " We are going to have a really long conversation about this Yoona,"
But you shake your head.
"No. I'm not going with you. I didn't do anything wrong." You flash step and put your clothes back on but then you also grab your sword and assume a challenging position.
"Y/n don't do this, all I am suggesting is that we talk. I am not trying to hurt you or even fight you. So calm down, " Taeyeon says trying to calm you down
"Talk about what? You can't baby me anymore. I want to be with Yoona…I will be with Yoona. I'll be with whoever I want. You know I asked Kazuha to be my girlfriend today?"
Yoona was also shocked by this information because she didn't expect you to have already a girlfriend whom you just started dating today. She felt bad because she was your side piece and the second option.
"I am not babying you anymore! I won't do it. We left off at a very bad place in the morning so I just want to clear it up. For fucks sake just listen to me just this one fucking time," Taeyeon said her showing more and more frustration as the conversation goes on
You turn to Yoona.
"Just so you know, you aren't a side piece or a second option…I need to restart my clan…I want you, need you as a partner, Yoona…I love you just as I love Kazuha."
Yoona's expression turned softer after hearing that, she also realized the huge responsibility you had.
You then turn to Taeyeon.
"Don't you understand that? I love you…I want you…who better to restart my clan than you, Mommy?"
"I am open to that and I would be really happy to help you with it as well but Y/n you need to learn to take consent before you jump onto people like that, I was confused and didn't know what you really wanted," Taeyeon explained
You then flash step to her and kiss her deeply again.
"I want you…I want both of you…" Your spiritual pressure rising again.
"Calm down, you don't need to release so much spiritual pressure, I am right here," Taeyeon says as she brushes a little bit of your hair
"I need both of you…" I say with lust, as I derobe once again. "Both of my mommies…sucking my cock…I'm still so full mommy, you said you'd always take care of me.." You pout like a child, playing on Taeyeon's motherly affection for you.
"I will baby boy, I will always take care of my pretty little boy," Taeyeon says before grabbing your cock and slowly rubbing it
"Oh.." I moan, finally. My mommy..my hot mommy.
"Yoona mommy…Taeyeon mommy…please both suck my cock…worship it…"
Yoona crawls to you, with your cum still dripping out of her freshly used pussy. she massages your balls as Taeyeon plays with your cock
"Oh fuck yeah…yes…use your lips my mommies…fuck.."
"aww is that so if you want mommy to use her lips you are going to have to beg pretty boy," Taeyeon whispers in your ear and bites it
You counter and kiss at her neck. You were kissing your mommy…your beautiful Taeyeon and you nibble at her ear too.
"Please Mommy…suck my cock…I've wanted to feel it for so long…your beautiful lips and tongue.."
"Now, that's a good boy, " Taeyeon coos before getting on her knees and taking the tip of her cock into your mouth.
Yoona takes this opportunity to stand up and kiss you passionately
"Mommy it feels so good…you were meant to do this right? My cock…to take care of me…this is the only cock you ever need…"
Taeyeon speeds up, taking in more of your cock every time she went down, trying her best to fit your entire cock into her tiny cute mouth
"Holy fuck mommy…oh my god…that feels so good…yes all of it.."
You kiss Yoona too, but you begin to thrust into Taeyeon's mouth.
Yoona pulls away from the kiss, "Go on fuck that throat like you mean it, show her who she belongs to," Yoona moans into your ear and goes on to kiss your neck and leave marks all over it
This turned you on a lot. As you begin to ram your cock into Taeyeon's thrust over and over.
"My mommy whore…my mommy bitch…my slutty mommy…" You chant as you finally get what you want. Taeyeon began choking on your cock a little but she still continued to take it into her throat as much as she could.
"Go on paint your mommy's throat white with all the precious cum, " Yoona moans as she uses your fingers to stimulate her clit
You bite at Yoona's breasts and suck on her tit..trying to draw out milk. You don't stop fucking Taeyeon's mouth as you shove as much as you could in there, watching it bulge.
"Holy fuck baby that's so hot, are you trying to get milk out of me baby," Yoona moans as she pets your hair like a child who is getting breastfed
"Fuck if only there was milk coming out right now!" You moaned in between sucking Yoona's tits
You had to figure out some spell for that or something…
"Oh, mommy…I'm going to cum…down your fucking throat…"
"GO on baby cum all down your mommy's throat," Yoona cooed you dumped all your cum down Taeyeon's throat
You pant and huff, pulling out and smiling.
"How does it taste Mommy? Your first taste of my cum? Your baby boy's cum?"
"It tastes amazing baby just as I expected it to but holy fuck don't you cum a lot. this is your second load and it is so much I wonder how thick the first load must have been," Taeyeon states,
"Oh the first load was massive and thick alright, his cum is still leaking out of my pussy and I am 100% sure that I am already pregnant with his baby," Yoona says
You pull Yoona in for another torrid kiss with your tongue.
"Your feet next…both of you…I need to taste them and fuck them…" You say with desire.
"aren't you an insatiable horny bastard, if that's what you want then your mommy's shall oblige," Taeyeon says
You growl.
"Oh? Calling your baby boy a bastard? How naughty of you, mommy!" You grab both of them and toss them on the bed. You lie down and have Taeyeon and Yoona sit near you by your cock. Taeyeon folds out her legs towards your face and you begin to lick at her toes and the underside of her feet.
Yoona meanwhile gives you a footjob.
"my baby boy is so naughty and always horny for his mommies isn't he?" Taeyeon questions as she enjoys you worshipping her feet
"I love your white nail polish Mommy…and Yoona's black…so sexy…your feet are so fucking good.."
Taeyeon's feet were so soft and you try to suck on all five toes from her foot at once.
"Aren't you a greedy boy wanting so much all at once, If I had known that you were a feet-loving boy then I would have gotten a pedicure before coming here," Taeyeon says before moaning
You suck on her toes harder.
"No, your toes are so good…so hot…I love them…please give me a double footjob mommies!"
"you are so impatient," Taeyeon says before using one of her feet to push your cock into Yoona's other foot. Both of you matching the rhythm together to jerk off your big hard throbbing cock
"HOLY FUCK MOMMIES.." You howl loudly as they worked together perfectly to stroke your cock off with their feet. The contrast of pedicure colors was amazing
"oh you are really enjoying this so much aren't you, my little perverted loser," Taeyeon teases you as she continues to play with your hard cock
"He loves it so much Unnie, he blew such a huge load when I gave him a footjob before," Yoona says
You pout. "Mommy…that wasn't nice…I'm just so attracted to you…"
"You don't have to lie baby I can feel your cock throb whenever I say things like that," Taeyeon says
"It turns me on when you want me, mommy…you're all mine right?"
"Yes baby I am all yours, both of us belong to you
I then flare up my pressure and jam my cock back into Taeyeon's tight cunt, growling as I use flash step and slam her into the wall and begin drilling into her gasp "Fuck!" Taeyeon moans out as you drill into her the sudden invasion of your cock stretching out her pussy a lot more than expected
"What was that mommy?" I growl as I hammer into her and then kiss her neck, biting at it a bit.
"It feels so fucking good baby, keep pounding Mommy like that use my hole however you want!" Taeyeon growls
"Remember you're my mommy…and my caretaker…I am your Master and baby boy…and you…I fucking own you…to fuck…and use as a whore!"
"Yes, you own me, fucking use me as your whore! make you your cum dump!" Taeyeon moans out pleasure completely taking over her brain
I kiss her with my tongue and speed up. The tightness of her cunt was immaculate..my whore mommy getting fucked by my cock was something else.
"Mommy…I want to drink your fucking milk…"
"Go on baby you can have how much ever you want!" Taeyeon allows you
"Unnie, What is he talking about?" Yoona asks confused about what milk you are asking Taeyeon for
I then lower my mouth to her right breast and swirl my tongue before latching on and sucking. I was finally drinking her milk…my mommy's milk…it was perfection.
"NGHH" Taeyeon moans, the pleasure getting too much for her. It felt like absolute heaven, she hadn't had something feel this good in such a long time
A little milk leaks out from the corner of your mouth and this surprises Yoona. So many questions popping into her head and you see her eyes lined with confusion. To distract her you push your fingers into Yoona's wet pussy and finger her as you continue to pound Taeyeon
"Mommy's milk…mommy's cunt…you're both mine…" you growl.
You were fucking Taeyeon so hard…your mommy…your whore…your bitch…was now truly yours.
Taeyeon's moans now sounded like screams absolutely tearing through thr roam and they were accompanied by Yoona who was also on the cusp of another orgasm
"I'm going to fucking cum mommy! Going to fucking cum so hard!" You roar.
"Go on baby cum inside your mommy, breed her just like you did me," Yoona encourages you and Taeyeon is just simply beyond the ability to speak right now
You were finally going to do it, you were going to breed your mommy Taeyeon…
"FUCK!" You slam your cock all the way inside her cunt and explode…cumming the hardest and longest you ever have…you weren't pulling out and waited minutes until you fully emptied, painting her walls white.
Taeyeon's mind was going absolutely haywire, completely taken over by pleasure. The cum was so warm and felt perfect inside of her. satisfying everything that she had ever wanted.
You then kiss Taeyeon with more tongue.
"Mommy…Yoona…on your knees both of you…fucking clean my cock…it's official now…you're both my whores to breed and restart my clan."
Without any replies, the both of them were on their knees, cleaning up your cock.
You hiss in pleasure as both their tongues and sweet lips worked your tip and they cleaned every bit of cum left. They shared it between them and you pressed their heads together to make out with your cock.
"I've been developing a kido spell…" You say before using the enchantment and a marking of the Uzumaki clan forms just above their cunt before disappearing.
"what is it supposed to do baby?" Yoona asks innocently.
Taeyeon is also curious and is just waiting to see what you answer
"This will make it so nobody else is allowed to fuck you…your body will only respond in pleasure to my touch alone."
"Oh someone is possessive!" Taeyeon and Yoona say at the same time
"Of course…my clan…my whores…I need to keep it all in line…now then…YoonA..I think you should move to the clan compound. We can use this place as a safe house."
"Oh am I finally being allowed to move into the Uzumaki's compound" Yoona questioned
"Yes you are, You belong to me now so you should stay where I can reach you any time I want," You reply
YoonA stands and kisses you lovingly.
"Good…it's settled then… let's head back. I have my first official day tomorrow so let's try and take it easy for the rest of the day."
"Yayyy!" Yoona cheers as she puts on her robe and begins to grab things that she will need.
The three of you get back and head back into bed. You were so happy having them on either side of you…you snuggle with Taeyeon and kiss her.
"I love you, mommy. You're mine."
"What about me?" Yoona whines as she hugs you
You kiss her too.
"And you too.." All three of you drift to sleep shortly after.
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dollishbabess · 2 days
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A new kind of love??
A/n this fic is based off the song “a new of kind of love” by frou frou <3 I hope you enjoy!
Suggested nsfw? (Not really, if your gonna smth like this credit please or Aleast reblog this
Divider @cafekitsune - dollish
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The rain pelted the windowpanes, echoing in the dimly lit apartment. It was the kind of evening that made Jason Todd’s mind wander into the shadows of his past, the memories of blood, betrayal, and endless battles. But tonight was different, for you were here, sitting across from him, tracing the rim of your coffee mug, completely unaware of the effect you had on him.
He leaned against the window sill, gaze drifting toward you as you spoke about something that happened earlier in your day. He was only half-listening, not out of disinterest, but because he was too focused on memorizing the way your lips moved, the softness in your eyes, the faint smile you wore when you thought no one was paying attention.
“… and then he spilled his entire coffee on himself, seriously I think he might’ve had too much to drink? After all it was a Sunday morning!” you finished, laughing lightly.
Jason smirked, shaking his head. “Sounds like he had a rough day.” (🐻‍❄️)
You nodded, then shifted your gaze to him, eyes softening. “You seem distracted. Are you okay?” Your feeling a bit hurt ‘what if he he found you cringe?’ But you shook it off
Jason hesitated. He was never good with words, not when they mattered. “Yeah, just… thinking.”
“About?” you pressed, leaning forward, curiosity dancing in your eyes.
He rubbed the back of his neck, stalling. How could he explain it to you? How could he tell you that every time he was with you, he felt something he thought was long dead, something he had buried beneath layers of pain and anger? “You make me feel…” He trailed off, searching for the right words, then gave a small, almost defeated laugh. “You make me feel things I didn’t think I could anymore.”
Your brows knitted together, concern etching into your features. “Is that… bad?”
“No,” he said quickly, and then softer, more vulnerable, “No, it’s not bad. It’s just… new.”
He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing, “You know, when you’ve been through as much as I have, you start to think that you’ve seen it all, that you’ve felt it all. But then you show up, and it’s like I’m experiencing everything for the first time.” He swallowed hard, his eyes never leaving yours. “It’s a new kind of love.”
You didn’t say anything, just watched him, your heart pounding in your chest. The silence stretched on, not awkward, but heavy with the weight of unspoken words, of shared feelings that neither of you were quite ready to acknowledge until now, it felt like a situation ship at first but.. he really loved you.
When you finally spoke, your voice was barely above a whisper. “You’ve seen the worst of the world, Jason. You’ve faced things most people can’t even imagine. But maybe…” You took a step closer, your hand reaching out to rest gently on his arm. “Maybe that’s why you deserve something new. Something good, I got a feeling you are-“ you cut off worried of how he looked at you.
He stared at you, a million emotions flashing in his eyes—hope, fear, longing, disbelief. “You really think I deserve that?” he asked, his voice cracking just slightly.
You nodded, not a hint of doubt in your expression. “I do. And if you’re willing to take the chance, I want to be the one to give it to you.”
Jason let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding, his heart thudding painfully against his ribs. And for the first time in a long time, he allowed himself to hope, to believe that maybe, just maybe, he was capable of this—of loving and being loved in return.
He closed the distance between you, pulling you into his arms, his head resting against yours. “I’m scared,” he admitted, his voice muffled against your hair. “But for you… I’m willing to try.”
You smiled, wrapping your arms around him, holding him close. “That’s all I ask.”
And in that moment, with the rain washing away the remnants of the past, Jason Todd found himself falling into a love he had never known before—something raw, something real, something entirely new.
Later on patrol with dick “dude, are you falling in love? Or what you totally fumbled the confession.” said dick grinning at his younger brother or little wing he called him, the same grin Jason swore he thought of committing just not to see it, “shut up dickhead.”
(🐻‍❄️)
—love is the embodiment of you and Jason, you fill each other perfectly, he never felt like he’s been loved this hard ever by anyone which gives him suspicions that your a spy but your perfect in his eyes always and forever you always find each other in different universes together.
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Made by @dollishbabess please do not put in any other platforms ty ever much!
Again divider credit @cafekitsune
I ACCEPT REQUESTS PLEASE REQUEST MY LOVES!
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themeraldee · 2 days
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The Lucky Winner - Part 3
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[Masterlist] [Part 1] [Part 2] | [AO3]
18+ Only | 10k | Homelander x fem!Reader | Early Season 1. Voice kink (very mild mention). Awkward first dates. Awkward dialogue. Messy timeline. Established Relationship. Love confession. Emotional sex. Unhealthy Relationship.
Summary: Your life turns upside down, again, when Homelander reaches out to you asking you out on a date.
Author’s Note: This is set between the events of Part 1 & Part 2. It really is just a self-indulgent excuse to explore some relationship building and dynamics. Lot of awkward dialogue so be warned.
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The next time Homelander contacts you it catches you just as off guard as the first time. Maybe even more so. You never expected him to turn up in the first place, let alone be interested in seconds.
Your phone is ringing on the bed and ever since the development from a week ago you’ve been on edge anytime your phone rang. You drop the towel you’re folding back on the pile of unsorted laundry and you nearly dive onto the bed, reaching for your phone. In the panic you drop it about three times, your shaky hands inadvertently playing hot potato.
“Hello?!” You yell into the phone, panicked. You don’t actually end up checking who’s calling, too worried about not accidentally hanging up. Plus it’s not like you could have saved Homelander’s number from a week ago anyway. It showed up as blocked on your phone’s call logs so you had no way to recognise his number.
“Hello there! Nice of you to pick up.” You squeaked in surprise and the voice on the phone turned from chipper to confused. “You okay? You sound a little—” And oh my god, it’s him! You’re talking to Homelander, again. Okay, okay, now it’s time to try and keep calm.
His voice is still gloriously rich and sweet in your ear and here you are about to most likely embarrass yourself again because for the life of you you’re incapable of coming across as calm and collected.
“I’m fine!” You immediately cut him off, your voice shrill and strained. He does not need to know the ins-and-outs of your internal struggle. But either way you’re already doing terribly. Who are you to cut Homelander off mid-sentence? Where are your manners? 
“Why are you—um—I mean, is there anything you need?” You clumsily make your way through your response. Definitely not how you wanted to present yourself but it’s a lot better than barely being able to say a word like last time!
“I’m taking you out on a date. Get ready for 7 today.” You heard it. You’re pretty damn sure you heard that right, yet not a single part of you believes what he said.
“Sorry? W-w-what do you mean?” You sputter in confusion, your brain simply not capable of computing this news. 
“I mean that I’m taking you out for dinner. What’s hard to understand?” He sounds irritated and your heart is pounding. From so many things at once. How are you meant to process that Homelander contacted you again, is asking you out for a date and now you’ve managed to irk him?!
Before you manage to apologize, following your typical spiel, Homelander continues. “Maybe you don’t know this but it’s kind of what men do when they want to get to know someone. You following yet?” 
You ignore the condescending remark and instead you focus on what he’s actually saying.
There may as well be steam coming out of your ears, you genuinely feel like a blushing teenage girl talking to her crush. You’re hot bright red in the face and you feel the literal heat coming off your face.
“Yeah but you’re not—well of course you are—but also you’re not! Y’know, just an average Joe.” How do you go about explaining that you don’t feel worthy of that kind of attention?
“Doesn’t matter, you’re missing the point. Is that a no?” You’d think he would be pissed saying that, who in their right mind would refuse going on a date with Homelander, but he sounds amused more than anything. 
Again with the reading you like a book. Because you barely manage to let out a barrage of “No! No no no no— that’s not!” before Homelander starts laughing.
“Alright, I’ll pick you up then.”
“No, wait! I can’t—I can’t do the public thing. You’re you! And as soon as I show up in public with you I won’t be left alone. I know that’s normal for you, but my life isn’t like that. I’m just… me.” You’re just a nobody. You don’t have a social media presence. You don’t bring attention to yourself. And you like to keep it that way. Going on a public date with America’s golden boy himself? You would be ripped apart by the online vultures. 
You all but freak out on the phone and for a second you think he disconnected because you can’t hear a thing over the line but he suddenly speaks up.
“Oh well. We can’t have that, can we? You better have dinner ready at your place instead.” You don’t need to see him to imagine him with the biggest satisfied grin on his face. “I’ll be there at 7. Catch you later!”
Homelander hangs up on you and you hear the disconnected tone ringing in your ear as you stand there like a fish out of water. Mouth gaping open, letting out disbelieving stutters. 
You pull the phone away from your ear, looking down at it as if it offended you. It’s then you notice the time. Shit shit shit. You have less than four hours to make your place and yourself presentable, go on a grocery run and start cooking for Homelander?! What just happened!
“Oh no no no no. This is not happening.” You rub your hands over your face as if to wipe the shock off your face. You’re so overwhelmed with the rollercoaster of emotions that you don’t know whether to have a panic attack, laugh nervously or downright cry.
Okay, first of all the pile of laundry is gonna have to wait. You don’t have the time to meticulously fold your t-shirts and panties. You gather up the clean and dry laundry into your hands, haphazardly shoving it into the closet before closing the door on what will be an avalanche of laundry for your future self to deal with.
With pure panic-induced energy that you haven’t felt in a long while you manage to just about make your place presentable within an hour. Finally managing to gather and clean up the mugs and glasses that have been cluttering up your surfaces, making your bed all neat and tidy—just in case—and shoving all unnecessary clutter into cupboards. It’s not like Homelander would use his x-ray vision to judge the inside of your cabinets, would he?
Speeding your way out of your apartment you make your way over to the closest shop. Standing in the fresh produce aisle you suddenly realize you don’t actually have a plan. What the fuck are you meant to cook for Homelander?! Even after all the content you’ve consumed you’re pretty sure there’s not a single mention of his favorites. At least ones he’s not been sponsored to promote. Sure, he’s on many products, ranging from frozen peas to whole milk but that doesn’t mean it’s something he genuinely endorses. After all you want to get to know the man behind the costume, a date is not meant to be just another PR interview for him!
You’re starting to look strange. People are passing you while you’re internally panicking over what to buy. What if he’s allergic to something? What if he goes into anaphylactic shock and fucking dies! Even if you had an EpiPen or he carried it on him you wouldn’t be able to stab it into him anyway. And suddenly you’ve killed the world’s most beloved superhero and you’re spending the rest of your life in jail with Vought most certainly making sure you pay your dues. Even if all of that was true you had no way of knowing. It’s not like Vought would ever leak that kind of information. Not very good for their brand to tweet that their best superhero is allergic to fucking nuts!  
You shake your head a little, snapping yourself out of your dazed state. If Homelander’s brand is anything it’s that red-blooded American male perfect standard. Surely he wouldn’t complain about some steak dinner right? Men love steaks! You just make sure to avoid most common allergens. You pick up some potatoes and other vegetables to roast along with a good pricey cut of steak that was easily out of your budget.
You get home just as fast and with each passing second you’re more and more on edge. You don’t know whether it’s the anxiety coiling in your guts or the so called ‘butterflies’ but you’ve never been this nervous before. With the clock ticking and the food cooking you’re suddenly more and more paranoid over everything. From your insane Homelander merch collection to even just the furniture you’ve got! Not that that’s anything you can change in the next hour but your mind is running at a hundred miles an hour and you’re trying to account for everything. 
Just before it gets to the agreed time you change into something nice but casual, straight after shoving the laundry avalanche back into its place. You even leave the balcony door open, doubting he’s gonna knock on your door like a normal person. 
And while you’re there focusing on platting up your best attempt at steak and roasted vegetables, you hear the familiar sound of Homelander’s landing. You whip your head towards the wall clock with such urgency it’s shocking you don’t give yourself whiplash. 
Shit. It was literally 7pm. You wanted to set the table all pretty and prep it perfectly but you got so preoccupied with the place looking as good as it can that you lost track of time. You’re sure he’s used to luxury and perfection. You want to do your best to replicate that!
“Homelander!” Comes out of you with a little gasp. You tilt your head to look at him. And what you see makes your heart skip a beat. 
There he is, in his suited-out glory per usual, except this time he’s holding a bouquet of roses with a dashing smile on his face that quickly turns into a self-satisfied grin as he immediately notices your panic at his presence. Even after he thoroughly reduced you to a puddle of goo just last week you were still such a skittish uncertain thing around him. 
“Wow, smells delicious in here.” He looks around taking it in while inhaling the mouth-watering smell of sizzling steak.
Homelander steps closer with calculated steps, checking you out without an ounce of shame. You don’t know if it’s just the pure intensity in his eyes that has you feeling on edge or if he really is undressing you with his gaze. “These,” he frees your hand, prying your palm open with his gloved hand, “are for you.” He places the bouquet of roses into your palm, squeezing it shut around the wrapped stems.
In a way you’re paralyzed. The reality of the situation finally hits you and you realize you’re really here about to have a dinner date with Homelander. Who just brought you expensive, gorgeous flowers, because that’s something that totally happens to people like you.
You’re standing there, staring at the deep rich red of the roses that actually ends up matching the cardigan you put on for this. Your little attempt at complimenting the suit you knew he'd show up in. 
Your mind is going a million miles a second and your other hand squeezes a petal in between your fingertips. There’s droplets of water on the velvety surface. You didn’t realize it was raining at the time. You look past him through a window as if you could make out the weather through the darkness of the evening.
Looking at the roses now, they look beautiful, pristine. He flew here right? How did he manage to keep them in one shape with the speeds he flies at.
“H-how did you fly with—” You don’t even finish the question before he’s answering.
“I don’t have to fly at super speeds all the time. You’d think my most loyal fan would know that.”
“You can read minds too?” Falls out of your mouth before you even think about what you're saying.
“No. You’re just very easy to read.” He places his hands on his hips, naturally defaulting to his superhero pose. 
And sure, maybe the way your eyes move in between the window, him and the flowers is a dead giveaway but you still don’t think it’s that easy to figure out exactly how your thought process works. 
He seems unhappy with your lack of enthusiastic response. He probably expected you to jump at him, wrapping your arms around him in pure glee that he’d do such a romantic thing. 
He nodded towards the bouquet, raising his eyebrows.
“Anyway, your flowers. You might want to put them in some water. Unless you plan on fondling each petal all night.” You don’t know whether he said it that way on purpose or if your absurd attraction to his voice is reaching new heights but the imagery that conjures is not one that would belong at a dinner table. There’s a different kind of petal-fondling you have in mind for later.
“Sorry! I’m sorry. And thank you. Really, this is very kind of you. They’re beautiful.” Finally, he’s satisfied with that response, his shoulders relax a bit, his chest puffing out as he sees you hold the flowers closer to you.
You’re all over the place and your movements are in no way elegant or thought out as you awkwardly stumble around, pulling out the biggest glass you could find. This ends up being a large glass measuring jug which you admit looks rather strange, and you don't miss the way he raises his eyebrow at the display. 
Well, it was a lot better than if you used the bucket you keep under the sink for cleaning. It’s not like you have a perfect pretty vase ready for this occasion. Until now you didn’t have anyone bringing you flowers and you never really bought any for yourself.
He doesn’t comment on the miserable display. Instead he focuses on how wound up you are.
“Jeez, you’re even stiffer than last time. You know I usually fuck my dates after dinner, but if you need me to loosen you up…” His crude attempt at humor and breaking the ice just has your brain screeching and halting all actions. 
“What?! No, nonono. That won’t—That’s not. I’m sorry. I’m just surprised. That you’re here.”
“I did tell you I’d come. And I’m pretty sure you’re not plating up two plates for yourself there silly.” He shakes his head while clicking his tongue, as if disapproving of your doubt. 
“I mean, I’m surprised that you want to do this. With me.” 
“Why wouldn’t I? I’m here aren’t I? Last time I checked I asked you out, not the other way around. And trust me sweetheart, I don’t do shit out of pity.” He walks closer to you, his hand patting the side of your arm, settling his hand there and sliding it up until he reaches your jaw. The leather of his glove is cold, some raindrops still stuck in the crevices.
Although your heart rate picks up, you smile genuinely. Getting the straightforward confirmation that he wants to be here with you warms your heart. “Alright.”
“I’m sorry I don’t have everything ready. I lost track of time. Do you mind just sitting down, I’ll finish up in a second.”
“Yup, can do.” He sits down at the small table slapping his palms on his thighs as he does so. Already peeling his gloves off, discarding the gloves at the edge of the table. 
You finish up the plating, trying to make it as neat as possible. You bring the plates over, one in front of him the other right opposite. “Um, do you drink beer? I got some in case you do. I know you do endorse some but I’m sure that doesn’t mean you have to consume it in your free time.”
“No thanks, never got the taste for it. Have you got milk?” 
You blank a little at the request. It’s not the typical pairing by any means but who are you to tell him what to like. Instead you comply, tucking away the little preference into the corner of your mind where you keep all your knowledge about him.
“Um, yeah. I do. Again, I got one you’ve done marketing for, just in case you did like it. I wasn’t really sure. Believe it or not there’s a lot I don’t know about you.” You admit. It’s not like everything that his Marketing team puts out is all real. You're sure they leave out any of his actual preferences so future advertisers don't clash with any competition.
“With this logic I’m surprised you didn’t buy the entire store.” 
“I was close to it.” You take the carton out of the fridge, shutting the door with your hip. “Do you want it warm or cold?” 
“Cold is fine.” You nod, pouring some into a glass placing it in front of him.
As a last touch you take two roses from the huge bouquet, popping them into a narrow tall glass filled with water and you place the romantic decoration to the side of the table before sitting down.
He strangely smiles at the gesture, something about it feeling awfully domestic. It may not be perfectly manicured but it's real and it does the job just as well. It's not a perfect setting made for a photoshoot. You're just trying to impress him with what you've got. All for his enjoyment only. And that alone makes it a lot more special. 
Suddenly being right across him really set the reality of the situation. You feel a little awkward about the setting. But there is really only so much you could have done with your small apartment. And it’s not like he hasn’t been here before. He knows what you're working with.
You watch as he cuts into the steak, stabbing it with his fork and bringing a piece to his mouth.
“Wait! You’re not allergic to anything right?!” You suddenly panic, feeling cold sweat pour over you at the thought of your irrational thoughts from earlier coming true. 
He looks thoroughly amused but he doesn’t answer and instead just takes the bite. 
“Are you always this worried on dates? Or do you get them to fill out a questionnaire beforehand?” He seems to enjoy throwing all these little jabs highlighting how much of a nervous mess you are in his presence. 
“I don’t usually cook for my dates on the first date. There’s usually nothing to worry about.”
“I did ask you out for dinner. This is your own doing missy.” He waved his fork at you, pointing at you being the one to blame.
“You think I’m—oh. I’m not complaining about this, oh my god! I just didn’t really know what you like! Surprisingly not a lot about that online. They really know how to keep you a mystery. And even superheroes have allergies! How was I to know whether you’ve got one or not? But even if you did, it’s not like Vought would release that information.” You ramble on, trying to explain yourself but you’re really just digging yourself a deeper hole. Not that Homelander looks particularly put off. If anything, the amused grin spreads to both corners of his mouth.
“You know I’m not here for the food right? Though this is not too bad. Didn’t think you had it in you.” He raises his eyebrows in appreciation. 
“I live on my own. I don’t know why you’re surprised to learn that I can cook for myself.” You said feigning offense but inside you were squealing at the compliment.
“When’s the last time you’ve had a date?” He changes the topic, with each passing moment he’s less interested in the food and a lot more honed in on you and what little secrets you can let him in on. Though he’s still happily nursing the glass of milk. 
“It’s been a while, I guess.” You’re overcome with this anxious feeling in your gut. Is it meant to be a dig at the date you’ve prepared? Is he saying that you’re not desirable enough to be dated?
He catches you off guard with his smug little smile. “Thought so. Guess you’re too busy being my biggest fan, huh?”
You nearly choke on your food, surprised and flustered by his words. The tell-tale sign of heat creeps up your neck and to the tip of your ears in embarrassment. He’s hard to read and you can’t tell whether he’s trying to humiliate you or if he genuinely enjoys the reminder of having someone fawn over him right there and then.
You put your cutlery down, softly clinking it against the plate. “Look, I’m really sorry about all that. I’m a fan but I’m not crazy.”
“I didn’t say you were.” The corners of his mouth comically pull down feigning innocence with a shrug.
You playfully roll your eyes. “You insinuated. I’m just saying I wouldn’t have all this stuff out if I knew you’d ever see it!” You wave your arm in the general direction of the rest of your humble apartment. Still littered with Homelander merch. If you had more time to prepare for the date you would have maybe even taken some of it down. Replace some posters with photos of friends or family, making you appear a lot more put together. But alas, your guilty pleasure is still blatantly obvious and out for anyone to see. It's all the worse that in this case it’s being seen by the featured star of your guilty pleasure himself.
“There’s no shame in being a fan.” 
“No, but it’s different to collect memorabilia and merchandise of a beloved superhero that you don’t ever expect to witness the madness and to actually have him see it all and feel objectified. As if all there was to him is just the plastic he can sell with his face on it.”
You don’t know why you’re getting into the heavy-duty topic of someone’s worth and value but maybe part of you just wants to present yourself as someone who cares. Someone who looks beyond the obvious. 
Homelander is similarly perturbed by your words. Clearly not used to fans taking such direction with him. Thinking about it you doubt he hears more from them beyond a predictable can I have a selfie?
He furrows his eyebrows for a second tilting his head. As if he’s trying to look into your brain to read your mind. And sure he can literally see inside your skull but it doesn’t help him understand your thoughts. So instead he digs deeper. Putting the glass of milk down he looks you straight in the eyes. 
“You don’t think that’s it?” 
His resolute question makes you pause, feeling as if you overstepped. And even if, there’s no way to backtrack anymore so you continue. “O-of course not. I know you’re more than what Vought puts out there.”
You’ve spent countless hours following the content Vought markets out to the public. All of it manicured to match his perfect brand and profile. They’re slick enough to control even the content fans put out. From conventions to random street encounters. You remember following a thread of an anonymous fan sharing their experience of getting barraged by Vought’s lawyers after they shared a post about a poor experience they had meeting one of their superheroes. You haven’t heard an update from that story in a while, god knows what happened to the fan. Maybe Vought’s lawyers managed to get their anonymous account too. 
“How would you know?” Irritation seeps into his tone, shoulders tensing, feeling exposed right before he slides back into his normal casual tone and body language as if remembering that he’s meant to be talking to a date and not some nosy interviewer trying to get the next scoop.
“I mean who hasn’t put up a face to show the world their perfect self? Whether it’s on dates or in front of friends. I just imagine that doing that in front of the whole world means there’s a lot you feel like you have to hide.” With each word you feel like you’re digging yourself a hole, ruining any chance of another date. But you’ve started saying your piece and when else are you gonna get the chance to tell the man exactly how you feel?
So you continue.
“I just think it has to be exhausting. Your entire job, your life is existing in the public eye and you can’t ever slip up? Not super-abled celebrities deal with that already but for you there’s the added burden of being seen as the superhero right? ‘Here to save us all’. I just mean, do you ever get to be yourself?”
You mean to be sympathetic, not that you could ever imagine what it’s like to be in his shoes. Being as obsessed as you are, you've watched all the footage with him. You notice how often the same lines repeat, how well he’s perfected the mask of a perfect hero. The fake humble you’re the real heroes being repeated in every video and appearance. If it was you, you know you’d have enough a while ago now. The daily grind of a job is exhausting enough but to do that all under the public’s scrutiny? You couldn’t even imagine. 
You were so lost in your little monologue, spilling all the little thoughts you had about him and his persona that you miss how his casual demeanor has once again shifted into something else. He’s less irritated but he’s tense. Even more so than before. He wears an expression you’re pretty sure you’ve not seen on him before. His jaw may not be dropped but his surprise and confusion is evident without it. 
He’s speechless. Thinking about it now, has anyone ever spoken to him in such manner before?
You watch his body language and the way he’s squeezing the fork so hard you’re sure he’s bent the metal. 
“Oh god, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to overstep. It’s just once I get going I can’t stop!” 
He lets out a breathless little laugh. His shoulders release in tension. He stops gripping the cutlery and sure enough it has a bend that definitely wasn’t there before but you don’t care. He’s not pissed. He raises his free hand waving you off and stopping you from apologizing any further. Something you’ve managed to do about a hundred times since his arrival. 
“No. No, it’s fine. You didn’t.” He shakes his head a little, looking at you with a different look in his eyes. No longer just looking for a little bit of excitement, now he’s truly locked in. What else can he get you to say? “Well maybe you did a little, but color me intrigued anyway.” 
He looks at you in a way that makes you feel small. You feel like you’re on your knees praying for your god to hear out your prayers knowing it’s unlikely for him to even notice you.  
“Can't say I've heard any of that before.” He concludes, slumping back into the chair now that he's relaxed again, having lost all interest in the food you've served up.
You’re embarrassed by the call out. It’s like all your efforts to not appear like another crazy fan have been pointless. He might not seem angry but that doesn’t mean he’s about to jump at the thought of another date. You may have ruined your chances at this being anything more than mild entertainment to him so you try to save yourself. “I just mean. I have always wanted to get to know you. The you without the cameras.”
“You already have. I don’t go on dates with many fans, believe it or not. And I gotta say you’re a lot more interesting than I gave you credit for.” 
And maybe it wasn’t such a lost cause yet. Have there been many people that Homelander has ever found genuinely interesting? You wouldn’t know but at least you’re one of them.
“Oh…ah-hah thank you.” You fluster under his heavy gaze. His words make your heart skip a beat. There’s very little that can match the euphoria of your hero, the hero really, saying he finds you interesting. It’s hard to calm the pounding of your heart at the thought of a man of his caliber seeking your company out.
After all you’ve managed to blurt out you feel more at ease. It’s not awkward like you expected it to be. In a way you’ve broken the ice you didn’t know was even there.
With you both losing interest or having had enough of your meals you move to the small but comfortable couch. And like any good dinner and movie date you put on the first title that gets advertised to you on the main page of the Vought+ streaming platform.
In reality the movie doesn’t get watched. Either you let it play in the background or you pause on sections just so you can continue the conversation between the two of you. And somehow it’s still mainly you literally just rambling on about him. It’s not that he doesn’t talk or doesn’t ask questions about you but you see the way he preens at all the enamored praise you send his way. 
The only parts that do get watched is the small cameo Homelander ended up having in the title and the conversation steers back to him. He gives you all the details you ask for, more than happy to talk about how great of an actor he is. 
With each minute of sitting close to him you feel your body respond to him. You feel hot. Too warm for the cardigan you’re wearing but you don’t want to seem too forward by taking it off. Especially after knowing what kind of trouble he could get up to in between your legs it makes it very hard to accidentally brush against his thigh and not spontaneously combust.
Homelander turns around to look back into the room while you’re dealing with your internal turmoil. Would it be too unseemly for you to initiate?
Your thoughts are interrupted when his bare hand cradles your jaw, bringing you in for a kiss. The whimper you let out is embarrassing but you quickly lose track of anything that’s not his hot lips melting you into a puddle. Just as things are about to get good, just when you’re about to pry his lips open with your needy tongue he pulls away. He doesn’t go too far. You can still feel his hot breath while he rests his forehead against yours. 
“I’ll have to set off. I need to get back to Vought tower.” He hums so close to you that you get goosebumps from the way his voice turns all low and hushed. Even though the words he’s saying are anything but good news, the attractive sound still soothes you.
“Oh-kay.” You nod. A little sad but understanding that he’s got things to get to. Every part of you is holding back from pulling him in for more but as much as your fingers twitch for him you restrain yourself.
“Come on now. Don’t sound so upset.” He gives your cheek a soft little pat before placing another peck on your lips with a chuckle from behind his closed lips.
The taste of your lips pulls him in anyway and he holds you close for a few more indulgent kisses. Upon separating you’re warm and flustered. His touch always seems to have that effect on you. 
“It's just… I had a lot of fun today.” And you don't want it to be over or for it to be the last time you see him. But how do you ask him out? 
While your limbs still feel like jelly, having melted into the couch, he stands up, walking over to the little dining table where he left his discarded gloves, pulling them back on.
“Don’t worry your pretty little head, I’ll be back.” He clearly reads your expression and watches as you stumble while getting up, clearly wanting to see him out before he flies off.
His words alone are good enough to lift your spirits and you let yourself show that joy outwardly.
“Thanks for today.” When’s the last time you’ve ever felt this in the moment? Even if he never came back this moment would easily be a highlight you look back on.
“Well, aren’t you sweet?” As if he couldn’t restrain himself his eyes snapped in between your eyes and lips, his eyelashes fluttering, lips parting as he took in the sight of you. So eager to please and be there for him. He wets his lips and your stomach flips at the display. The pink of his tongue disappearing as quickly as it appears.
His eyes soften, lips stretching into a lazy lopsided smile.
“Do I get a goodbye kiss?” 
And just like that with one last kiss he’s off again, returning to his duties.
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This isn’t where things end with you two. If anything, your life takes a massive turn. It’s not been the same ever since you’ve won that silly competition. And it strangely makes you want to send a gift basket to whoever organized it, no matter how much you dislike Vought itself. 
At first he comes back to you seeking comfort.
He strolls in through your balcony door which you’ve gotten into the habit of leaving unlocked—just in case. It’s not like there’s anyone else eager to fly into your home. You awake at the disruption, eyes bleary and straining in the harsh light of the nightstand lamp you’ve turned on to see what’s going on.
He doesn’t explain himself as much as he just vents to you about how he’s not being respected and taken seriously. It’s the first time he’s been back since your date and you’re surprised to see him so emotive. So unlike the perfect persona or even the carefully charming guy he presented himself as during  your date.
He’s already pacing back and forth, the thud of his boots bound to disturb your neighbors below. Not that either of you care. He’s too preoccupied with being angry. And you’re too frazzled by the thought of something upsetting your hero to this degree.
You see the angry tremor in his hands and the sharpness of his teeth, highlighted by the yellow night light. You snap out of the sleepy daze and you catch his gloved hand when he paces in front of you. 
You pull him down next to you, cooing supportive words and showing your own anger at seeing him be so disrespected by Vought. You believe they don’t know how lucky they are to have someone like him. They should revere him, yet the things he lets slip in his anger make your chest tight, fueling the rage simmering inside you. 
It’s like seeing you riled up at the way he’s being mistreated is enough to calm him down. The more you seethe the more he cools down, the energy exchange working in between you perfectly. He’s pleased to have someone in his corner. Preening at how much you parrot the words he’s saying without needing to nudge you in that direction.
Swoop-in visits like these happen more regularly. Either he comes in irritated wanting to get some frustration and anger out, fucking you throughout the night until all he can think of are your moans and cries telling him it’s too much.
Or he comes in happy, excited to share the news that his numbers are up or that the public and the on-scene reporters couldn’t stop praising him after his latest save. Those days he comes in for affection and a cuddle, wanting to hear over and over again just how well he’s done since you’ve last seen him. Treating you less like a stress ball and more like a teddy bear he’s hugged against his chest in comfort. 
You start thinking how lonely he must feel. The thought that there aren’t any people around him showering him with genuine love and friendship hurts you and suddenly you want nothing more than to keep him here with you, making sure he knows just how special he is.
As much as you’ve always been devoted to this god-like being and the idea that he represented, you never got to love the person. Until now. Now the ideology alone has seeped into your never ending love, fueling the suffocating adoration you hold for him. So strong it’s eating away at you anytime you don’t get the chance to scream how much you love him.
You used to see these late night visits as something he does for his own benefit. With you always being the easiest and most effective balm to his troubled soul. You didn’t think he was serious with you. After all, this is the Homelander you’re spending every other evening with. 
So when he sends you flowers out of nowhere, effectively courting you, you start thinking that this might be turning into something real.
It starts with the first delivery at your door. A gorgeous bouquet bursting at the seams, tagged with a note saying it’s from Homelander. Since then he’s made sure to supply you with the most beautiful bouquets as if to keep a reminder of him on a daily basis. You finally invest in a pretty vase, knowing it’s going to be thoroughly used and displayed.
Your home always had touches of Homelander throughout it—some might even say too many. However, as your relationship grows you come to a realization that those really only represent Vought. It’s these new touches that really represent Homelander’s presence in your life. Like how he times the flower deliveries just right so your place is never empty. Always there to remind you to keep him at the forefront of your mind. Never wavering. 
You two haven’t officially said that you’re dating throughout these nighttime visits but it’s at the tip of your tongue each time he comes. You want to voice the love you carry for him like a burden. Overflowing from your arms with nowhere to go. And it feels like each second you don’t say it, it’s being uselessly spilled on the floor like sand falling from in-between your fingers.
Homelander has his own way of showing affection. Seeing as so much of his life has been in front of some sort of camera you wonder if thinking in advertising scripts and photoshoot visuals comes to him more naturally than casual and real gestures. As ever since he started with the flower deliveries he’s been showering you with gifts upon each visit. As if everyday had to be Valentine’s day and he had to bring something to symbolize the reason for his visit.
You call him out on that one day. 
“You know you don’t have to bring anything right? You don’t need to bribe me.” You chuckle at the gift box he brought with him. You’ve got dozens of similar gift boxes and bags that you feel reluctant to get rid of mainly for the sentimental value but the retail price associated with the gift they hold certainly doesn’t help. 
He clasps the gifted necklace around your neck. The dainty chain lays cold against your skin and your fingers gently caress the pendant with care. Your statement still rings true but you can’t help but feel giddy every time he brings you something he thought would look great on you. 
“Do you not like the things I bring you?” With a perplexed expression you see him trying to do mental math, trying to figure out why you could possibly not kneel or bow in gratitude. He watches you play with your new pretty jewelry with a squint. 
“No! It’s all beautiful—this one especially—just. I don’t want you to feel like that’s an obligatory part of you being here.” You laugh it off a little, still dreamily thinking about what it really means to get pampered to this degree. 
He breaks your thoughts with a simple sentence.
“Maybe I want to treat my girl.” 
Your eyes widen, and you let out a shocked stuttered breath.
“Your girl?”
“Yeah, duh.” He scoffs as if what he said is as obvious as the sky being blue and water wet.
“Because you’re mine, right?” You don’t see the way his eyes reflect his own complicated and simmering feelings. The tension in his jaw betrays how he needs you to acknowledge his words and speak them into an existence. But you don’t notice any of that because it’s like the dam you’ve been doing your best to hold together with safety pins finally bursts.
You’re nodding feverishly. No longer able to hold back you’re possessed to blurt out the words that have been threatening to fall off the precipice of your tongue for weeks. 
“I love you.” 
Homelander’s eyes widen. Surprised by your admission just as much as you are. Your heart is racing, suddenly feeling insane for thinking this was anything more than simple fun to him. The knee-jerk response to apologize spills easily from your lips.
“I’m sorry—,” but instead he interrupts you by cradling your jaw in his bare hands, stepping closer.
“Don’t be sorry.” He says in a low rumble, sending shivers down your spine. He leans in to give you a tender kiss. Just barely slotting in between your parted lips, pressing them against his. Before you get the chance to continue he pulls away with enough distance to speak up.
He breathes out, eyes squeezed shut in longing which to an untrained eye would just look like pure pain and frustration. But not to you. You’ve learned to read him better. 
He nuzzles his face against yours, dragging his lips across your cheek until he reaches your ear, growling a weak, “say it again.”
You’ve partially gotten used to the timbre of his voice in your ear. Capable of having a conversation without getting worked up by every word he says but the way he’s now needily begging in your ear has your body erupt in goosebumps. He doesn’t need to say please for you to hear it anyway.
“I-I love you.” You whimper out. The emotion alone feels thick in your throat, as if it was clogging up your airways anytime you come up for air. Your heart is pounding, you’re strung up, the butterflies in your stomach make you antsy. 
His hold on your jaw tightens. With a sharp intake of breath he smashes your lips together. No longer composed and tender. Your teeth nearly clash as he’s pressed you close to him. He’s prying your lips open with his, his whimpers easily falling into the press of your lips.
“Again.” 
“I love you.”
You don’t want to cry but you’re so overwhelmed with emotion the burn that turns your eyes glassy spills over and you’re dripping tears down your cheeks in pure emotional instability.
“Again.” 
And each time he asks he sounds more wrecked. 
“I love you.”
Homelander catches the tears with his tongue right before kissing the salty taste into your mouth. Not letting any of your love get wasted. You grab onto him, grasping where you can. Your hands tangle in between his as you wrap them around his neck. One hand grips as much of the fabric of his suit it can while the other tangles in his hair, pulling on it for support more than anything. 
You feel like you’re drowning. The intensity of the moment makes you gasp for air but it’s like Homelander kisses it back into your lungs like a lifeline. Hearing his shattered whimpers soothes you, his own need fueling yours, filling the void your tears are leaving behind.
He lifts you up and with practiced ease you automatically wrap your legs around him.
He leads you both to the bedroom while he’s continuously prompting you to continue declaring your love to him. Each again, again, again you reward with the three words that make him feverish and mad. The more you say it the less your heart feels like it’s about to explode from the burden it’s been carrying for too long.
Homelander quite literally rips your clothes off, not caring that he’s leaving his own recent purchases in tatters. He doesn’t want to separate his lips from your neck where he’s kissing trails across each inch of your skin.
You don’t have the luxury to treat his suit with the same carelessness. Even if you wanted to, the tough molded material would make it impossible. Instead you do what you can. Unclasping his belt, pulling at the front of his suit, pushing his pants down where you can reach.
He helps you with taking off the rest of it until he’s on top of you, skin to skin. You rarely get the luxury of lying with him fully stripped and each time you’re shocked at how hot he runs. Now his hot body is making you melt under the heat alone.
Neither of you have stopped kissing with the same intense need that has been laying there dormant for months. Anytime you have the chance you repeat the same words over and over again until they’re all you know how to say.
It’s the first time sex has felt anything more than a physical relief he comes to you for. You’re barely keeping it together as he nudges your legs a little open, sliding his hand down your body, his palm blazing hot as the anticipation makes you clench your core.
It’s by no means either one of your first times, nor it is the first time you’ve been together yet you’ve never felt more nervous. The first touch he descends onto your clit feels like a lightning bolt crackling down your spine, spreading the tingles out to your toes and fingertips.
“Ahh hah—fuck. Want it so bad, don’t you?” He looks as broken as he sounds when he hisses at the feeling of your soaked pussy. It makes his fingers glide too easily, making it harder to give your clit the precise rhythm he’s learned to make you see stars with. 
His attempt at his normal dirty talk is disrupted by his keen moans and broken whimpers. Part of you wonders whether his super senses include being able to feel other people’s sensations with the way he’s acting as if it was him getting his body set on fire.  
You hum and ahh in response, your tongue feeling incapable of saying anything but the words you’ve been finally allowed to repeat over and over again. 
His fingers easily slip inside the sloppy mess you’ve made for him and he moans right into the kiss he leans in to steal from your lips. And it feels good. The friction is perfect, his fingers are hitting the right spot inside you and the loud squelch is embarrassing and intoxicating in equal parts. Yet it’s not what you want.
It takes all your strength to reach down and pull his hand out of you, as instinctively you’re already clenching around the all too familiar emptiness you whine at every other time when he’s done with you. 
“I want you. Please. Just you.” You manage to breathe out, your hand reaching over for his hard cock. You give him a few shaky strokes, smearing his leaking precum across the entire length.
“Alright. Uh huh, okay. I’ll give it to you.” And he’s just as out of it as you as his normal cocky one-liners just break into a lot of grunts and stutters.
He wedges himself in between your thighs, spreading them wide open. His lips part with a wistful sigh while his eyes haze over with lust at the sight of your pussy spread ope, generously glistening with slick all made for him. 
He aligns his cock with your entrance, not even bothering to tease you. He’s just as strung out as you are. He splits you open with a single thrust, your slick pulling him in with an easy glide.
“I love you.” For the first time the confession spills from Homelander’s lips. A relief just as palpable falls upon him. It’s a different story for you. The words cause more tears to spill, a wet hiccup leaving your throat as you clench around him.
“Shh, shh.” He hushes you sweetly, already reaching back for you. 
He lays his body flush on top of yours and kisses your tears away, the heat and weight of his body on top yours grounds you. He repeats the words over and over again in between wet, messy kisses. He ruts into you in shallow thrusts as if he doesn’t want to part from you any second longer.
Nothing in the world exists but you two and neither one of you can believe how perfect you really are for each other. You’ve always felt like the way you love was overwhelming. It left the other person choking on the overwhelming viscosity of it all. Homelander isn’t like that. To him your love is a breath of fresh air. 
As long as you love him with the same unyielding intensity he’s yours. At this point, he wouldn’t know how to live without it.
He kisses you in a way that says just that. Needy and broken yet utterly completed by you. 
You’re both so worked up with the overflowing emotions it doesn’t take much more than his frenzied grinding to make you both reach the release that’s as emotional as it physical. Maybe even more so.
Because the reward isn’t just a good orgasm. It’s the love that fills the air, spilling into every empty crevice you didn’t manage to fill with your bodies.
Homelander’s whimpers resemble cries as he finishes inside you right as you flutter around him with the toe-curling orgasm wracking your nerves. 
It takes you a little while to regain your mental faculties after such an emotionally draining affair. You feel boneless, your limbs feel like jelly and you just lie there dazed. Focusing on the way your heart beats loud even to your ears. 
Homelander is doing the same thing. Listening to your heartbeat with his head on your chest.
After a long while you both pull yourself together. Still in bed but now you’ve managed to strike up a normal conversation again. Talking about everything and nothing.
You lie like this for what feels like hours. Having changed positions you rest your head against his chest, ear pressed to his pecs to listen in on the steady beat of his heart.
After this reveal your brain recognizes your relationship as the utmost priority. Because of that your eyes lock onto the Kuddle Buddy plush resting just a foot away from Homelander’s head. As if you were locking onto an enemy. You pluck it from the pillow, squeezing it in your hand.
You’re staring at it, still clutching it too hard. 
“What got you thinking so hard? You’re making my head hurt from how tense you are.” Homelander interrupts you from your thoughts. 
“Just you. This. I can’t look at this stuff these days without—I don’t know—rage? To know how much Vought has wronged you.” You furrow your eyebrows, assessing the innocent plush toy while it’s staring back at you with its stitched grimace.
“That’s what the toy reminds you of, really? It should remind you of me.”
“It doesn’t anymore.” Your furrowed expression slowly melts into one of content as your hand presses against your new necklace. “Things like these do.” 
“And these.” Your fingers continue to travel up your neck where they tap at the darkened patches you feel he has left behind. With soft nipping and sucking he left your neck coloured in all shades.
He plucks the plush toy from your hands, throwing it somewhere across the room with thankfully not enough strength to knock anything else over. You’re pretty damn comfortable and you’d rather not get up to assess any damage. 
“Maybe I should give you more reminders then.” 
You squeal as he easily pulls you up so his lips can meet yours, kissing your worries out of your mind.
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Homelander lands on your balcony with a soft thud. It’s late in the afternoon, earlier than he normally arrives, and he doesn’t want to attract unwanted attention. Already predicting the shit Madelyn would put him through if he got caught regularly perusing outside some random person’s apartment.
His person’s apartment really. You’re not just a random boring nobody.
He makes his way in quietly, closing the door and stepping in. Each time coming back to your apartment has felt more like coming home than he’s ever felt at Vought. You’ve arranged your life around him. He’s noticed you cancel plans, call off events just so you could stay in in the evening, waiting for him to make his return.
You even make space for him in your small apartment. The state of which he’d normally scoff at but it’s hard to mock your financial situation when you manage to make the place feel warm.
His presence left its mark in the gifts you happily displayed or the flowers you always took good care of.
And of course, the insane collection of merchandise you’ve spent years accumulating.
Wait.
Where is everything?
Homelander looks around, breaking out of his routine and instead he scans the surroundings as if it’s the first time he’s ever been here. Only now does he realize that all the usual merchandise carrying his likeness is gone. No posters on the walls. No action figures on the shelves. No funko pops. No collectibles. Nothing.
Homelander feels his blood pressure rise. There’s no way you’d want to get rid of him. Not you too. You love him. You wouldn’t do that.
He finally notices the black trash bags pushed into the kitchen, still open and overflowing with all the things missing from your walls. 
His stomach flips. 
No. Nonono. This can’t be happening.
You can’t get rid of him like this. He can’t lose you. 
Not after he’s finally tasted what real love in cooking tastes like. Or what it’s like to wake up next to someone who instead isn’t pushing you away straight after sex. Someone who makes an effort for him. Not out of fear but out of love. 
He mentally compares everything you’ve changed his perception on. 
Like when you give him a gift or help him out it’s different. Vought employees being at his beck and call could never compare. 
He’s the most powerful man in the world, with means that don’t feel like they have an end yet he could never buy the love you give freely. For once, love doesn’t feel like pulling teeth. It feels like a warm embrace on a cold winter night. 
You make it easy. You don’t fake it. And most importantly you do it unconditionally. Love him through thick and thin, the devotion to him a part of your very core. Your love is overwhelming, oozing and sticky like he’s never gonna be able to get rid of it. Just like you could never get rid of him.
You’re the only one who hasn’t left him.
Exactly. It can’t be. You wouldn’t.
This has to be some kind of a mistake.
The shuffle of your slippers against the floor breaks him out of his spiraling thoughts. He looks up sharply. Seeking some sort of explanation.
“Hey baby. You’re early today—what’s wrong?” The smile drops from your face as quickly as he sees it and it’s only then he realizes his hand is shaking. He squeezes it into a fist, the leather creaking with the pressure as he takes in a labored breath with a jittery shake to his head.
“W-uh-what is… What are you doing?” He blinks rapidly, shaking his head pretending that his voice doesn’t quiver and waver the way it does. 
“Bit of spring cleaning. After we talked the other night I just can’t look at this stuff and not think how much Vought has used you. I don’t want those reminders. It’s not what I thought it was and now that you opened my eyes to it, I can’t forget. So. Out with it.” You say so casually, not picking up on the panic he’s been going through in his head.
“Oh—okay.” He lets out a visible breath of relief, his posture relaxing. “I thought—” His jaw tightens and he looks away. Thought so heartbreaking, he doesn't want to give it voice.
“You thought I was getting rid of you?” You stop what you are doing. Putting the box on the couch and instead you walk up to him, hand on his jaw you turn him back to look at you.
“You’re not getting rid of me that easy.” You kiss him, and Homelander melts right into it. He lets himself melt into the loving embrace of your pliant lips.
“Good. I wouldn’t know what to do with myself.” When you pull away he puts his hands on your jaw, tilting your head as if he was inspecting you. Seeing if what you’re saying is true. And he can’t see a single speck of a lie with the steady beats of your heart and the taste of love on your lips.
“So what are you doing with all of it?”
“Selling it, donating or trashing some I guess.”
“Why not sell it all?”
“You can buy a Homelander poster or card at any shop for a few bucks. I'm not gonna bother with those.”
“What if I sign them?”
“Oh please don’t waste your time. You’re not here to be a show pony.”
“Nonsense, come on. Bring it out.”
Homelander ends up taking the stack of posters with his or the Seven’s likeness from the top of the trash bag, placing them on the coffee table in front of the couch. He sits down, hooking his cape out of the way. He picks up a pen off the table already signing the first poster. 
Part of him is still upset that you feel like throwing a part of him away. Is this part of him not good enough for you anymore? It’s how he found you, how he got to know you and now it feels like you’re throwing it away. 
As if you could read his thoughts you sit down next to him, placing your hand on top of his as he’s halfway through his signature.
His head snaps up towards you, expression clearly guarded while he looks you over with his piercing blue gaze.
He carries his upset so visibly it would be hard even for someone as unaware as you to miss it. His smile is tight, not even attempting to reach his eyes.
You pull the pen out of his grip, instead wrapping your hand around his. The other one goes to his hair, scratching your nails down his scalp until you reach his undercut where you play with the shortly buzzed hair.
“I’m not getting rid of you. Not now. Not ever.”
At that he leans into you, nearly purring at the pleasure your scalp massage brings him. The way you touch him with no hesitation will never cease to amaze him. There’s enough love pouring off you to almost fill the black hole in his heart. 
It was exhilarating to have someone so eager to keep him in their life. Everyone else has just pushed him away, entertained him until they got what they wanted. Not you. You give and give and give. Sometimes he’s scared you’ll run out of love to shower him with. However, one look at you tells him that the love you carry feels just as much of a burden as his need for it does to him. You free each other by sharing the love. You feed his insatiable beast of a heart and he lets you burst the dam free without feeling like you’re not allowed to.  
The posters are forgotten about. Any hurt brushed away with a press of his lips to yours. Needy and hungry, wanting to see if you can prove your words with actions. Again and again.
And you do. Like you’ve done a hundred times before and just like you will do thousands of times over.
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Taglist (you can add yourself to be tagged when I post a new Homelander fic)
@morishitoshi @ker0senebunny @itsvaleriesucka @thychuvaluswife
@nervoussystemss @littlegaaby @natliecole @thatvintagefanboy
@infinetlyforgotten @rafecamsgirlll @hom3landr @mrsdesade
@nommingonfood
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The Experiment | Part 2
In case y'all missed it, I asked one of my best friends to watch Stranger Things and here's what she had to say about season 1 and 2 .
Now, here's the updated version of season 3 that she finished so fucking fast and I felt guilty because she told me didn't sleep because she was desperate for answers, my sweet summer child.
This time around she'd update me as she watched the episodes and needless to say I woke up today with way too many messages
She's 100% convinced that Mike is gay because she said and I quote: "What teenage boy takes off the hands of his girlfriend like he did?".She also said that Mike should remember that friendships are important too, she doesn't understand why he's avoiding his friends and focusing too much on El.
She loves Max Mayfield BTW (again, sweet summer child). She 100% agrees that El needs to learn how to be herself without the influence of others.
She said that the biggest problem she has with Mike and El is that El didn't even know what a friend was the first season, how can se be in a relationship? However, she does think that if Mike learns how to listen to her they might work it out but she's not sure they should. "Ok I guess they're not going to work it after all" says her after their break up. Also, she was like: "shouldn't he be more upset about this?
In comes the rain fight scene and I think the conversation deserves to be in a mural somewhere. This is what she said and I apologize for the language and for how she talks about Mike but this deserves to be translated in it's entirety because her rant was epic.
"Why. The. Fuck. Was Mike being such an ass?! He used to be so sweet to Will and now he's treating him like this? Hell nah! Like, I get that he wants to spend time with his girlfriend and that's fine, but that doesn't mean he gets to treat Will like this!
And who the fuck said anything about Will not liking girls? Will didn't! So why the fuck would Mike say this completely unprovoked? Like, this is the kind of shit Will's bullies would say! I don't know who the fuck this Mike is, but it's definitely not the kid from last season.
"Oh se he goes to apologize to Will but doesn't apologize to El?" She asked me after she calmed down from her seething rage. "Inch teresting"
"Oh boy, Billy is gonna die. Am I supposed to want him not to?".
"How the fuck did Soviet Union manage to build this entire lab underground without anyone noticing? And this is I'm thr hight of cold war too, makes no sense but what do I know?"
She absolutely adores Robin, she thinks she and Steve will get together.
"Am I supposed to feel bad for Billy?" Needless to say, she doesn't like Billy.
"What. The. Fuck. Am. I. Watching?" She asked during the people turning into slush scene.
"Oh. So I guess Robin and Steve won't get together after all" lmao I laughed.
"Oh they do want me to feel sorry for Billy, huh"
She had a mental breakdown over Hop's "death". She sent an invoice crying and cursing me for bribing her into watching the show.
She also noticed how unresponsive Mike acted after El told him she loved him and was like: "is this boy ok? Like, I'm sorry Bia (my nickname) but you're telling me he just stood there with his eyes opened while she declared her love and kissed him? Am I watching this right? Answer me dammit!" (She was angry when I refused to tell her anything lmao).
Now, bare in mind that I haven't told her about Byler at all, didn't even tell her I ship it because I wanted her to be as unbiased as possible. She told me she had thoughts/theories and I told them to share them even after she claimed she didn't think she was right.
This bellow are her thoughts and hers alone, translated from Brazilian Portuguese to English.
"I just feel like Hop's letter is telling us something about Mike, maybe? Like, how he's afraid of change, of confronting his feelings, maybe? Like, I know you won't tell me, but I don't think this scene is about El leaving at all, I think it's about Will leaving.
"But I have a theory? I don't know, but the scene parallels the scene from when they find Will's body, right? But he comes home and holds his mom and I think this when he realized he has feelings for Will? Maybe? Or at the very least he realized he isn't straight.
" I didn't think Will was gay until I saw his reaction to what Mike said, and I think Will felt that he was stupid for believing that Mike cared for him at all. He destroyed the castle because he lost his childhood, he lost everything when he wasn't even looking, and I also think he called himself stupid because he thinks it was stupid of him to hope Mike could ever think of Will that way.
"I don't think Mike truly loves El, and he's coming to terms with the reason why he doesn't"
She then begged me for information which I refused to give her, obviously. But this is part 2. Now onto the last season *laughs maniacally *
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crucifiedkiss · 1 day
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◌ೆ୧  ͢YOUR MAIL HAS BEEN DELIEVERED ♡
𓈒⠀⠀⁺⠀𝜗 crucifiedkiss ╱ p. jackson x gn! reader 𝜚
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ꨄ︎ drbl ++ hcs dating percy pt2. ⏤ ﹙cupid﹚ 🪽 ˖ ׁ ⁩
  ಲ ͏ㅤ ׅㅤㅤcw: show!percy (i havent read the book(s) ...), season not specified, requested by 🦇anon ♡, ooc (proudly), not much plot, kissing (obv ..), fluff, silly teenagers being silly teenagers, drabble (drbl) ++ headcanons (hcs), drbl is pre-dating/before dating, YAPPING SO HARD IM SO SRRY 😭😭ㅤ✿𝅼
( 。>﹏<) "YIPPEEEE TY 44 THE REQUEST !!! percy jackson my sweet bb GRAAHHHH !!! enjoy ml 🫂 IVE STARTED READING PJO BTW GUYS IM ON THE 2ND ONE (THE SEA OF MONSTERS) :3" ⏤ c.k. と
 ㅤ، ׁ   ͢🦇ANON SENT A LETTER ♡
ㅤㅤ❛ ⠀⠀YOUR WRITING IS SO GOOD??? AND YOUR ART??? AUGHH eats your art (it tastes like marshmallows) ^,_,^ can you write literally anyone from percy jackson... 🫂 :3 SORRY I DONT HAVE ANY PROMPT IDEAS😪⠀⠀— 🦇
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𝜗୧ ּ݂⠀💌 dating percy jackson would include ﹗
   ⏤  him being extra soft when having to spar/practice fighting with u. the way his movements r a little more sluggish in a way, hesitant to put full force into attacking u, him usually ending up letting u win just so he can see that victorious look on ur face which leaves him happy for the rest of the day knowing he made u happy :3 the way he sheepishly laughs when u ask if he is actually putting effort to which he just shrugs and awkwardly rubs his nape, rejecting eye contact. he rlly wasnt a good liar😓 ... the way he barely even tries to swing at u but still does, not wanting to seem like he has completely no spark to him. the way he waits until ur fully gone before huffing, mumbling smth abt how its kinda embarrassing to act like a noob at sparring .. it was worth it tho to see ur the glee on ur face :) he never did want to hurt u, practicing or not. if he did, ur getting DRAGGED to someone as he begs for them to see if ur hurt rlly bad (has done this before definitely when u fell and scraped ur knee just BARELY or smth) (<- just wants u to be ok) (<- biggest green flag lowkey...❗) u have to tell him desperately that ur fine or else he is just going to proceed to bring u to someone to help u
   ⏤  kissing percy and him tasting like seasalt .. could u expect anything less tho? not in a bad way or anything, but he just tasted like the ocean physically lived in his mouth 24/7. never tell him so tho, he will whine like a baby and deny it – for a guy who likes water so much, he seems not to like that certain information. if u do tell him, no matter the amount of reassuring, he is brushing his tongue extra good that night and next morning, leaving you feeling slightly bad. it, of course, the taste doesnt go away. he is literally the son of poseidon: why WOULD it go away ??? be wary tho, it will leave ur mouth tasting of the same seasalt ,,, good thing is is that the taste is more faint, only lasting for a minute or two before fading ! hope u can last that long with the taste of the literal sea ..! ^_^" .... him being nervous abt kissing u aswell thooo. like, not nervous like "OH MY GOD UR MY FIRST KISS SAHSOHDODNWKX" or whtvr, but like "oh jeez ur rlly cool and stuff and what if i mess this up and and and" type nervous. normally, he was a confident and outgoing person, but smth about u just makes me a lil stiff in his movements – he does eventually get better, but would probably be vry hesitant at first ... idk idk just a thought :3 OMG WAIT: him, on a few occasions, wearing blue lipstick on purpose just for the reason he knows it will show up a LOT better and because it is rlly fun to see u frantically trying to wipe away the lipstick as percy smiles mischeviously. he looks a lil silly with the blue lipstick on but seeing ur face covered in lipstick marks from HIM ??? physically giggles, kicks his feet, and twirls his hair at night thinking about ur face covered in those lipstick marks (he is a little delulu pls excuse him😞) ... overall likes seeing ur skin covered with the pretty blue. would do it again and again and again and again and .. yeah .. SRRY FOR YAPPING BUT ALSO ???? ESKIMO KISSES ??? the tired giggle he lets out in the morning as he gives u the faint brush of his nose against urs is make me SICK thinking of it /pos does this as a way to say goodmorning :3 also, absolutely would BEGGG for a spiderman kiss. he doesnt know how to initiate it, but the moment ur upside down, he is SPRINTING 😭😭 pls do a spiderman kiss he is inlove with the idea. like ... a kiss ?? upside down ?? lowkey chaotic but in a cool way ??? yippee !!! sign him up !!! ALSO ALSO: tango dip kisses (dipping someone down, usually done during a dance/tango dancing, and kissing them), butterfly kisses (kissing someones eyelashes), underwater kiss (self explanatory, but kissing underwater), ETC. !!! sign him up🗣🗣🔥🔥
   ⏤  him worrying about everything he does, thinking about what u would think abt him doing this one thing. "is my hair curled enough today? i hope they like it ...", "would they appreciate the small details on this outfit?", "would they like my different cologne? would they even notice it?" type of thinking. takes everything into consideration and rlly hopes u notice the small things he does for u. makes sure it doesnt seem desperate .. works sometimes. always asking annabeth her opinion on stuff, assuming she would know tons on u, true or not. cue annabeth coming up to u one day and huffing abt percy practically daily asking her questions about u – he is just trying to be sweet but oh my gods😓 always yapping. takes u into consideration with almost every action/decision he does lowkey😭 has saved him plenty of times honestly ... not all the time tho cause he is still the silly dumb person he is but /silly/pos
   ⏤  him absolutely hyping u UP and just being rlly sweet/supportive !!! oh, ur feeling down ?? immediate compliment and a chasted kiss to ur cheek. having a bad day ?? gently brushing his knuckles against urs, just to remind u that he is open to talk about anything at any moment ... etc. etc. he is HAPPY to give u a new compliment/fresh joke each day if that is what makes u happy or just anything u enjoy. u like rocks ?? gives u tons. u like astrology ?? getting u a telescope so u can look at the stars and books on stuff like such, AND SO MUCH MORE !!! just wants to support what u like doing, featuring motivating and joyous grins. never turning down a opportunity to let u know ur doing amazing or just doing ur best, sneaking a few silly flirts in there aswell cause its PERCY were talking abt😭
   ⏤  lingering everything. and by that i mean: lingering touches, lingering stares, lingering ... everything, as said. just seems like the person to be rlly obvious with how much he loves u. the touches were so gentle, as if a feather just lightly caressing over the skin, and the stares were so loving that u would expect his pupils to be practically shaped into hearts and the ocean blue of his eyes overall would become a pink-ish color just filled with affection alone and seeming as if he had been blessed by aphrodite themselves. it is such a painfully obvious thing that he just cant help, wanting to let his touch stay a little longer to feel the nice comforting feel of ur skin against just the tips of his fingers, his gaze to dash all over ur face as he tries deciding what to actually stare at which ultimately ends up everytime on ur own eyes just a little longer– he wanted time as a whole to stop just so he could stare at u forever. maybe it was the way the sun just beautifully illuminated ur skin, the way ur eyes shimmered ... blah blah blah. ur perfect in his eyes, case closed !!
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dating this, dating that. it was always romantic stuff these days. percy never found the appeal at first, making a playful gag sound as someone longed on about their one and only. it wasnt like he never thought of having a partner of sorts, but it just seemed, well, weird, which was understandable for a kid of his age. being young, desiring a relationship could be likely, sure, but with percy he was unsure. as life progressed, he slowly came to realization that a partner could not only be a romantic interest he, himself, could long about like others have, but also be someone he could just lean onto at times. arguably, a partner was someone he could just really be himself with.
with ever-so much hesitancy, he slowly got into the loving life, and gods he never regrets it. maybe fate, maybe not, but the fact he stumbled upon you just on the day he finally decided to try out dating was a miracle to him. you left his heart clenching comfortably, stomach swirling with feelings he was just never sure of. was this what love truly felt like? maybe you were the one. he prayed to every god out there and to aphrodite specifically that he wouldnt stumble over his words like a love-sickened idiot.
would you even like him? his hair was really messy today. maybe you would like his messy hair? gods, he was thinking to deeply into this. youre just another person at camp. 'calm down,' he thought to himself and, obviously, it hadnt worked. when has that ever worked for him, realistically? whatever. off topic.
first time speaking to you and he, embarrassingly enough, had stuttered and his voice cracked about three times – great going percy, absolutely peachy job! one awkward conversation later, you surprisingly became his friend. he didnt know how that even happened, thinking on the spot of you seeing him that you would just ignore him or something ... where was his confidence? he sighed in relief nonetheless, knowing that with enough encouragement from him—and likely others because he was horrible at both keeping and hiding secrets—, that he would maybe have a chance.
"just say tons of jokes. maybe they like jokes ... gods i hope they like jokes." he mumbled to himself before slowly beginning to walk towards you, pace so slow it would almost seem like he dreaded talking to you which was quite the opposite. just talk. that was simple enough, right? hes got this, hes got this.
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fitzfunnymoments · 5 months
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Behold. Anthro designs for the dipshit brothers™️ (I've had the sudden urge to rewatch Catscratch because of nickelodeon scene it)
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soft-serve-soymilk · 4 months
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More random head children musings (aside from the really sad one because that deserves better than a throwaway post):
Honestly I think it’s very fortunate that Dism’s team isn’t *entirely* comprised of lucid dreamers.
#just pav things#they’re teenagers that haven’t lived with using their powers their whole lives. they have no innate control over it#They’re FAR more likely to push themselves psychologically because of their emotional issues#And they don’t know when too far is. So they face their punishments for overtaxing themselves as a result ✨#And like. Dism wants to play hero and be the MOST useful so he overcompensates and takes on too much#Doesn’t delegate tasks/responsibility in battle to anyone else at all#And because he’s wielding that persona Inigo also overcompensates because he doesn’t want Dism to get injured#something something lingering thoughts of Archie y’know ✨#And the poor coordination that Dism and Inigo both have in Arcs 1-3.5 means Idyllia#who secretly feels she’s done a terrible job of protecting the people she cares about her whole life#then uses her healing powers to an unnecessarily high degree#because there is one borderline-suicidal not-even-dodge-tanking-as-supposed-to idiot and#trying-to-fulfill-a-misguided-social-agenda idiot 🌈#What are the ultimate results of this?#Well you have ~75% of the party who are barely holding onto this plane of existence#Dism who can barely walk or speak because he can’t *time* any movements of his body correctly#Idyllia who’s left generally shaky weak and extremely fatigued— her life and vitality disappearing into vapid traces#And Inigo who loses his senses and any bearing on reality at all. Even the most basic tasks unintuitive to him#The chances of a TPKO would be absolutely certain if not for Cynthia being able to nurse and protect them while they’re recovering 😭❤️#Honestly they are coasting by on a LOT of luck and it shows#If the end of Arc 2 was any indication…..#They do get better though <3#And that’s how they manage to pull off the successful rescue operations for Idyllia and Archie later :D We love some good teamwork :)#Now you may be thinking— how does this same concept pertain to Archie’s kids?#Theon exhibits the same symptoms as Inigo… or that’s what I would say#He’s so scared of repeating history’s mistakes that he only uses his intuition for guiding his aim and not anything like#scanning for weaknesses or seeing the future. ESPECIALLY THE LATTER#So Theon actually doesn’t tax himself much at all#Consequences for Ewan include a sheer rejection of rationality and logic and positivity#Too much light is blinding! Leaving him blind to everything but his baser impulses
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widevibratobitch · 4 months
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im so fucking mad at myself at my mother at her dead husband at god fucking knows what. "concentrate on yourself" well i cant can i. now more than anything i should and i cant. losing my fucking mind istg
#i wasted the whole fucking weekend because i *had to* come visit her and once i visited i *had to* hang out with my fucking grandfather#watching him cry about grandma and bitch about modern times and the waiter not doing his job because the café was full to bursting#and it took longer than usual to get our coffees so ofc he had to loudly insult him in third person. oh and then he had to bitch about#gay people and women who dont want children too because of he did. and i sat there and listened to it because i HAD TO#wasted four fucking hours. and then i HAD TO go to the theatre with my mom because she got us tickets because she wanted this#to be a nice day for me but i dont have fucking time to have nice days rn but in order for HER to have a nice day i need to at least pretend#i am having one. so i wasted another almost two hours on that play#which was some modern uselessly loud to the point of being physically painful bullshit bad enough that we left mid-show#and then i had to go meet with her friends so lost another two hours and by the time i got home to write that bullshit thesis it was 11pm#and i barely got anything done till 1 am because i went through another stupid little mental breakdown and then it was almost 6 am#and i had to stop because i had a train at 8 and i already only slept like 3 hours that day#and then i got home yesterday totally fucking exhausted and i started reading stuff for the thesis but i was falling asleep so i laid down#'for 10 minutes' and i woke up today at 6. not having written a word lol#and now i could just say fuck it and defend it in september and it would make my life so much easier. but my voice teacher wants me#to get accepted for the masters degree even if im already planning to get the deans leave for the first semester so like. god.#i cant do this lol#i know i should have started earlier but i was kinda busy losing my fucking mind and lying in bed staring at the ceiling for hours#and contemplating dropping out completely lol god i hate my life so much it's unreal
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disdaidal · 1 year
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I don't want to brag or sound too optimistic about it, but after three weeks of training at a private college, I think my lessons with this one particular immigrant student (who has serious motivational problems lemme tell ya) are finally starting to get through and there's been improvement.
Only slight improvement so far but I have spotted some, so maybe not all hope is lost yet.
Remains to be seen I guess.
#personal#so in case anyone's still wondering i'm studying to become a tutor/instructor/guidance counselor etc. etc. whatever it's called in english#and currently i mostly work with immigrants with language. sometimes i help high school students as well. but mostly immigrants#and there's this one immigrant student who's been there since last spring. and he still barely even knows the basics because he's 'given up#according to him that is. he told me this at least three times yesterday and i told him that's a problem#so i've been trying to hammer it through his head that he can't be sitting in classes and using his phone when he's supposed to be learning#or expect me or teachers giving him all the answers when he also needs to show a little effort and help us back as well#and that he needs to participate in pair and group activities in classes because we're a team and we need to work together#so basically he's been asking me to either teach him or then find someone who can teach him#i told one of our teachers this and she answered that he could also participate in evening activities at the college but he's not doing tha#and according to him he doesn't 'mingle'. so i told him maybe he should once in a while. get out of his comfort zone. at least try#to my surprise he actually showed up to one of the evening activities that i hosted. didn't do much anything there but sit but still#that was effort. he did exactly what i said despite it making him a little uncomfortable so that's improvement#so then yesterday he asked me about teaching him the language again. i told him i host a homework club at tuesdays & thursdays @ 3:30-4:30p#he showed up there yesterday and was the only student. so i had time to teach him basic greetings. weekdays. months. things he shoulda know#and i thought it's all probably in vain but i tried. so today. he was in their class and actually doing pair work and reading stuff aloud#and even translating some stuff when i asked. calling it easy. and that he's trying to use his phone less and memorize this stuff instead#to which the rest clapped at and cheered him on for. and i told this to the teacher afterwards when she asked me about him. and she gave#me a thumbs up and looked a little surprised but also delighted. because he's been a popular subject amongst ourselves for a reason#so i don't want to get too optimistic about it. because he still has an attitude problem. but he's tried a little at least. so there's hope
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taegularities · 1 year
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Is cmi going to continue?🥹
hi there!! i really want it to, but it depends a lot on you guys, too 🥺 so far it's not going too bad or super great, but i also don't wanna say or decide anything yet – i'll wait a lil, since it's a long chapter and it might take people some time to get through it!! will see how things are in a week or so. in any case, support it a lot, loves. i do mean it when i say you can absolutely spam me.. definitely don't wanna abandon them <3
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boomerang109 · 2 years
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one thing that sucks about theatre is that it literally is built around people coming to see it so no matter how good a production is, if there wasn’t good advertisement beforehand, it isn’t nearly as satisfying
#also it extra sucks that i had like 3-4 irls who said they were gonna come and they just didnt#and im not mad or anything. its spring break and also life happens and everything#but it just sucks to work so fucking hard on a production and barely have any audience#and even the audience thats here like. isnt people i know/care about#shout out to my one friend who DID come though and after giving me a tiny gift was like ‘okay i have to run my flight is like in four hours#I need to sleep’ THAT is more dedication than I would’ve given personally#but yeah to my irl who follows me if you see this I promise this isnt @ you#i just use tumblr like a diary#(but I gotta say I reaaaaally hope you don’t see this lmao)#but also i kept being like ‘okay i just need to hold out i KNOW this one specific irl is coming’ and they didnt :((#and i cant even be upset cause theyre chronically ill and they were doing big things the rest of the weekend so I bet they were having#a flare today. AND they’re gonna take me to get blood drawn tmrw which is like. the biggest favor in the world#so like expecting them to come see a two and a half war play on top of that is excessive#but I just. I was really proud of this show and I am sad i didnt get to share it with any of my friends yknow?#(AND i wanted to be able to talk to people and then to the actors be like yeah this is my friend—- AND I COULDNT)#also my roommate literally told me last night she was coming and i don’t think she’s here#but im pretty sure she’s hungover so im not too surprised lmao#anywayyyy im just complaining its fine im excited to get HIGH and play viddy games tonight
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grasslandgirl · 2 years
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.
#for some reason thinking abt my birthday (in 3 months) and how. most likely. for the like third time in as many years. it will be a quiet#disappointment. turning 23 and knowing my friends will do the bare minimum to celebrate with me#and like. I love them both very much and they are good friends but like. last#year one friend bought me coffee and forgot the present she meant to give me as a half Xmas half bday gift. and the other fully forgot it#was my birthday at all. and it feels like every year I try to think of something I want to do and people I want to spend it with and it’s#like hearing cats and pulling teeth to try to organize anything and most of the time it still manages to fall through and it feels like. why#bother at this point when I know it’s a hassle and it’s frustrating and it makes me feel uncared for and disappointed yk#like I’m the organizer and the plan guy in almost all my friendships and that’s fine I don’t mind I love being that person. but it sucks to#have to feel like you’re cajoling people into giving a shit about your birthday and celebrating it with you#and now I feel like a fuxking self centered pity party throwing piece of shit bc it’s not that deep and it’s not that important and it’s not#even soon. but there’s always this small part of me that like. hopes for my friends to take initiative and do something and want to celebrat#with me and throw a party or even a surprise party which I would love and it’s like. it’s never going to happen. they won’t. and it’s not bc#they don’t care about me but it’s bc they won’t ever think to do that. it won’t occur to them. and I just. have to deal with that and I have#to accept my birthdays as quiet and find the personal internal joy for myself and not depend on people to show they care about me the way I#I would show for them. yk? like that’s what it comes down to. I just. I cried on my birthday last year bc it felt like I gave more of a shit#than my friends did. and that sucked. and I don’t want to feel like that again so it feels like the solution is to lower my expectations so#radically that I can’t be disappointed. and that just sucks a little bit too#anyway. it’s not that deep it’s fine I’m fine my birthdays not for months still I don’t know why I’m feeling emotional abt this
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nomairuins · 1 month
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and also it doesnt even matter if i miraculously get a job tmrw bc we don't have a car . and im too out of shape to walk anywhere bc everything is far away . so i genuinely dont jnow what to do
#im not smart or talented or hot enough to have a source of income working from home.#i dont have a ged or a kicense or a way to get to work or much experience + ive got a steadily fucking growing gap in my employment history.#And i have essentially 0 social skills i barely Function half the time im dissociated or just crying. im weak and out of shape and#not pretty im like. unhireable i think . and again even if a place did hire me I dont have a way to fucking get 2 work#i might be able to walk 2 a place if i had been at work for a while bc if be more used to being on my feet and active again. its take a#while and id be in a Lot of pain but like. itd be doable. and once i worked for s bit i could get lyfts even tho Expensive also idk that#there as many drivers here. and wtvr. but if i did that itd be Less money to help my family and less money to save up toget my own place and#atp maybe its selfish of me to want my own place and i need to judt be more grateful im allowed 2 stay here . yk#idk. im so tired i just need like. idk. ik the only way is to just get through it and get a job and make it work but it feels so pointless#everything always does. i cant keep getting over hurdles man im so fucking tired of getting through hurdles#every single day is Difficult and every single day is the Same and any time j manage to have a good day ill just go right back to feeling#exactly the same. and even if it looks like everythings better for a bit it all goes back down eventually and ik im supposed to be like But#itll get better again after that <3 ups and downs are a part of life <3 we have to have the bad to appreciate the good <3 im just fucking#sick of the goddamn bad im fucking sick of it ive had enough bad i want good. ik other ppl deserve it more i want everybody to have good#days and be safe and happy i don't want things to keep getting worse but everything just gets worse and all the good parts r tempirary and#im so tired. I am not your strongest soldier bro !!!#idk. i just want to be atable i dont need anything crazy i just want my family to live comfortably and to have enough money that i can#donate i rly donot need much i dont need that much food 2 survive i dont need a ton of space i dont need a nide house i like. i just want to#be Stable and know that everything will be ok. yk. at least 4 my family i want them all to be able to eat and the bills 2 be paid and#hopefully for lamp and the kids 2 go to college. bc lamp and tag both want to go to college and itsy is 6 so he soesnt care#but i want them to be able to so bad bc i can't and i ws never gonna be able to and i dont get to be whiny abt that but like. they want to#and theyre smart and passionate and like. i want them to be able to achieve their dreams and get to have normal lives and be fulfilled and#happy. yk. idk. annie showed me her schoolwork the other day and since it wa first week at like. an alt school it ws a lot of personality#type stuff and mental health stuff and im not gonna get into it bc its not mine to tell but. their answers for one of the things made me so#upset bc it sounded so much like me when i was their age and even now and it makes me feel so guilty that like. i didnt make it better for#them. im the one whos supposed to endure it and then theyre supposed to get to be happy but im too fuckinf weak nowadays and i can't keep#any of them safe or happy and i feel so insanely useless. i hate it i just want to be useful idc anymore like. i want to be good i want to#be helpful i want to be cared abt and its so selfish bc a part of me is like. Ohh wahhh we shouldnr have to do all that to be cared abt wahh#and its dumb bc Yes i do its my job. it just fucking sucks rn bc like i have all the like. sorrow over this being what i have to do and this#is my lot in life but i also have all the guilt over how im not doing it bc km lazy and selfish and i cant just work bc im . Ugh
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interiorlulus · 2 months
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I've managed to avoid going to see my maternal grandparents in France but at what cost (deep, profound shame).
#context: they live in bumfuck nowhere southern area the next town over is top 5 worst most boring place in the country#you can't get anywhere without a car#it's close to the beach but not close enough without a car AND it's NOT the côte d'azur lemme tell you#you can't even go on a walk bc 1) mosquitoes 2) the heat 3) the sights suck ass#like there's no hidden charm or anything. out of ALL the gorgeous places in France (of which there are PLENTY) my gps decided on THAT#did i mention my grandparents are separated but live together bc they got married in the sexist 60s? so my grandma doesn't own shit?#and my grandfather is senile in all the worst ways and she has to care for him bc he has dozens of medical issues#there's at least one or two fights between them when we go there and he is a grade A asshole#to give you an idea: my mom once said ''she wouldn't want people to not want to go to her funeral''#so yeah not even his children like him#my aunt who lives close by (1h30m in car lmao) is a secondary school teacher so it's always complaining complaining complaining#and i'm stuck listening to people 50+ who are completely disconnected from me bc they haven't had a proper conversation with me since 2012#''oh why don't you travel with friends instead?'' i'm ashamed to admit i lack independence and drive to do so. and i barely have friends#i want to really badly. i keep telling my friend who lives between granada/coimbra i should come see her but i don't know how to begin#it's so embarrassing at my age to be this helpless and i hate it#i'm in my twenties! i should move around and try new stuff! but i'm so afraid my inexperience and immaturity will show#i keep turning to my mom for help and that also doesn't help bc without her i don't push myself forth#i'm just so ashamed of being myself rn#this turned into one hell of a vent#me.txt
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pearlymel · 2 months
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"Do i look like i can work right now?"
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Summery : he's needy for you and he's not afraid to show it <3
wc : 2k
Warnings : NSFW, fem!reader, ōral (f! recieving), bit of dry humping, making out, protected sex. Petnames used (honey, love, sweetheart.) No plot.
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He was so done for.
Zayne exhaled shakily against your neck, his hands squeezing firmly at the dip of your waist for stability. He sounded needy, he looked needy, it's taking everything in him to not rip your nightgown off.
"You should be resting, but you occupy my every thought." He uttered in a hushed tone, but made no real effort to take you off his lap, instead pulling you even closer using his knee and burying his face on your chest.
"You're practically latched on me, Zayne." The words just rolled off your tongue it was almost infuriating.
Zayne wrapped one arm around your hips, keeping you firmly on his lap as the chair kept rocking back and forth with your combined weight. His other hand traveled up your back, up to your shoulder and neck, pulling you further down so he could nip at your collarbone with a sharp canine.
"You're one to talk, sweetheart. You're not being very cooperative with being treated properly, always gambling your life away—" he sounded frustrated, the last few words coming out in a low grumble.
You ignore his words, instead bringing your hand to playfully pinch at his earlobe before whispering, "is this how you usually treat your patients, doctor?"
"This is..." Unprofessional, he almost said, he knew well there wasn't anything professional about how he was acting with you at the moment. "...An exception."
He then continued to litter your skin with open-mouthed kisses, his hand trailing up to find your nape, tangling his fingers into your hair, playing with the textured strands.
"Is it because I'm that special someone?"
You really have no idea what kind of effect you had on him. Zayne's teeth grazed against your pulse point lightly, his tongue darting out for a brief taste of your skin. He would be lying if he said that he wasn't very affected by you.
"My special someone," he murmured, and can't help the low gasp that escapes his throat when you start rolling your hips against his, feeling himself going dizzy.
"M-my love," he protested weakly, a visible growing tent forming in his bathrobe, making it harder for him to stop himself from pulling you harder against his lap.
He grabbed you by the thighs and leaned back into the backrest, giving you less space to move but a better angle to straddle him instead. "Don't stop," you whisper next to his ear while you try to continue pushing yourself further into him that he had to suppress a moan.
Zayne was sensitive man, being pent up most of the time, so touch straved. "You're a terrible patient, you know that? Insatiable." He managed to get out.
"I'm a different kind of patient," you hum, trailing your fingertips along his visible bare skin of his chest.
He was going to combust if you didn't stop touching him like that.
"You're dangerous." he almost whimpered, his hands moving back to grip your hips, as if to steady them on his lap, but it took every ounce of his willpower not to grind them against his crotch.
God was he done, Zayne finally wrapped a hand around the back of your neck and pulled you back down for a crushing kiss. It was less of a kiss and more of a possessive mark, hungry and rough.
He wanted you, needed you, he couldn't get enough of you. His tongue delved into your mouth with a greedy swipe, tasting you, as if he was drowning in you and the only thing keeping him alive was your kiss alone.
His breathing grew erratic as his hands slid down from your hips, grabbing the backs of your thighs and squeezing at the flesh, pressing you more firmly against his lap so his obvious hardened cock was rubbing between your legs.
Your sounds were unforgettable, Zayne could never forget them, the gasps and small whimpers of pleasure. He was already gone.
"Goddamn it..." he cursed hoarsely against your mouth, his hands clenching tighter under your thighs, guiding your motions on his lap before bucking up roughly, letting out a quiet groan of his own in the process.
"such a foul mouth, doctor,"
"Don't push it," he grumbled, lifting you up to his waist, "Push it?" You ask while wrapping your arms around his neck as he walked you to his room, and upon the realization, tap on his shoulder, "wasn't i supposed to rest—"
"That doesn't mean you can't rest after, does it?" he responded, moving over to the edge of the bed before slowly lowering you down onto the sheets, his body caging you in between his arms and legs, his form hovering over you.
He wasted no time sliding his hand underneath your silky nightgown to feel your skin, pulling the fabric above your head, guiding your arms up.
Zayne was a weak, weak man. Weak for seeing you like this, glossy eyes, lips slightly swollen from his kiss and the way your chest rose and fell heavily with every breath. Just being able to see you like this alone was a privilege.
He let his hands roam over the curve of your stomach, "so pretty," he muttered, his eyes raking over your form.
He leaned down to graze your neck with a trail of open-mouthed kisses, his lips lingering and nipping the skin, he then slowly traveled down your collarbone and to the valley of your chest, his fingers fiddling with the clasp of your bra the entire time.
"Lift your hips." he commanded quietly, sending a shiver down your spine and heat pooling down as you obliged to his words.
The last thing on you, and Zayne was pulling the fabric out from underneath you, throwing the bra somewhere on the floor, his eyes dark as he raked his gaze over your soft mounds, "I'm never getting tired of this view." he whispered breathlessly, Upon holding your wrists down and claiming your lips again, it was impossible to not be sent into the next cardiac arrest.
Well good think your doctor is always here to tend to you.
"I've.. missed you,"
How was he supposed to hold back when you sounded like that? Your voice coming out in a low, needy whisper that drove him over the edge.
"You need me." he groaned, releasing your wrists so both his hands could run down your sides, hooking his fingers into the waistband of your panties before giving the fabric a tug. He reached over, grabbing one of your legs and hooking your knee over his shoulder before pressing a gentle kiss on the inside of your knee, He continued to make a trail kisses up your thigh until he reached right infront of your wet folds.
Zayne looked up when your hand came in contact with his hair while letting out a shuddering breath and a whisper of his name, your gazes heated as he moved his head further down to your core, using one hand to keep your thigh pinned over his shoulder before his eyes fixated on your clit, leaning down to kiss it.
You gasp. His tongue flicked out, tasting you, before he began to suck on your clit, his fingers trailing up to play with your hardened nipples, rolling and pinching them gently with his thumb and forefinger. He hummed when you start squirming, his tongue skillfully flicking and rolling around the bundle of nerves, Zayne didn't stop at just your clit, though.
He trailed his tongue lower, teasing your entrance, and you couldn't help but tug at his hair, hips coming to slowly grind against his face. "Stay still, you're doing well," he praised, his voice low and soft, you best know he's trying so hard not to rut against the mattress from how achy he felt. His tongue sliding in and out, coating it with your arousal. You could feel yourself getting closer, the pressure building up inside you.
And you think you might pass out when he starts sucking down. It was hard to stay still when you're so close to orgasm, that it was making your head blank, eyes half-lidded and heavy breaths coming out of your lips as you arch your back when you taste the sweet pleasure of your release.
Zayne lifted his head from between your legs, licking his lips appreciatively and giving your stomach a few fluttering kisses. "You okay there, honey?" He asked in a low, hoarse voice as he watched how your eyes were still half lidded, and how your draped your arm over your face.
You only nod in return, letting out a low "Mhm,"
He couldn't wait until he was on his knees positioned between your legs, throwing his bathrobe off from his body before reaching down to his painfully hard cock, stroking once, twice, and he had to stop himself because he could most definitely jerk off just by looking at your face, especially when you're naked like this.
Zayne swallowed thickly, shaking his head to himself from any other thoughts before reaching over to the nightstand and grabbing a condom, tearing it between his teeth then rolling it on himself, making sure it was on securely before moving between your legs.
He pressed the head of his cock against your entrance, staring into your eyes, waiting for you to give him the go-ahead. You nodded, your eyes still heavy with need, and he slowly pushed into you, his cock filling you up inch by inch.
Your jaw hanged, your body adjusting to him, your walls gripping his shaft. He continued to thrust in slowly, "you're the only thing..." He panted breathlessly into your neck, "the only thing i need in my life—" and he continued to rock against you with his thrusts slow and deep.
Zayne was taking his time now, slowly and with intent, he wanted to show you how much this moment means to him, how much you mean to him, how everytime you both have sex, it would feel like the first time every single time.
He lifted his head so that he could look at your face more clearly, his hands running over your sides, tracing the curves and the softness of your body, his fingers touching your skin as if to burn the feel of you into his memory.
His hand then trailed to your left wrist, taking your hand into his to interlace your fingers together, while his thumb brushed over the empty spot on your ring finger.
He internally cursed at himself for not getting you that ring he saw when he was on the way to the hospital. The beautiful gem resting on the window display, calling for him even.
Why didn't he just get it so he could make sure no one would ever look your way when they get the hint of the shiny ring sitting at your left ring finger?
Zayne then picked up the pace, his thrusts becoming harder and faster, your voice growing louder, accompanied by his frustrated grunts.
He could feel himself getting close, his thrusts becoming more erratic, "Come on, my love," he urged you desperately, "a-ah, Zayne—!" With a loud moan, you came, your body shaking and your legs convulsing around his waist.
He followed right after, slamming deep into you, his cock pulsing as he came, filling the condom with his hot seed. He held you close, both of your breathings heavy, taking a moment to hold you both close before slowly pulling out to dispose of the condom.
"Still have enough energy for cuddles?"
"Mm, I'd want nothing more than cuddles right now."
A smile formed on his face at your words, gently shifting himself back on the bed so that he was beside you, pulling you into his arms.
He wrapped his arms around you, and he let out a content sigh, his fingers tracing idle patterns on your skin, his head in the crook of your neck again, inhaling the scent of you, and he realized that he could stay like this forever. "Just a bit more before i clean both of us up.."
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chaconnenha · 5 months
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ꔫ I'LL BE YOUR BOYFRIEND
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❛ 𝐈𝐍 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐂𝐇───𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖽𝗈𝗇'𝗍 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍 𝗍𝗈 𝗌𝖾𝖾 𝖾𝖺𝖼𝗁 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖺𝗇𝗒𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖾𝗅𝗌𝖾...
爱 𝓮𝗇𝗁𝓎𝗉𝘦𝓃 𝔁 𝒻!𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 › sum. you're not his girlfriend, and he's not your boyfriend, but... ♯ cw. jealousy & possessiveness, petnames, minor suggestive, insecurities ✉️Ꮺ jw's scenario inspired by @jwnstars <3 ❪ THE ✦ LIBRARY ❫
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𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆 doesn’t even spare a glance to the girl clinging onto his arm when you walk through the door. immediately brushes the girl off to follow you when you glare at him, before turning on your heels to walk away. he really doesn’t want anything to do with someone who isn’t you, but has to put up an act because that’s the only way you ever show him any reaction. doesn’t take long to find you where you sit at the bar alone, nursing an untouched drink. you roll your eyes, getting ready to leave, but his hand shoots out to grab yours and pull you into his lap, arms wrapping around your waist. “no need to act so jealous,” he teases. when you deny it, he chuckles, because you weren't fooling anyone except yourself. “you know, you could end this once and for all: just say the word…” he places a sensual kiss on your cheek, smirking when you shiver involuntarily at the feeling of his lips. “and i’ll show everyone here that i’m yours.”
𝐉𝐀𝐘 is so sweet, it's hard not to feel special... until you realise that he's just that way with everyone, and that you weren't an exception. he doesn't see anything special about the way he lends a girl his jacket when their shirt is soaked through. but you don't know that. so you barely look at him, and forego the usual pretty smile that you grace him with whenever you meet eyes. he literally follows you around like a lost puppy for the rest of the day, and he doesn't care if he looks pathetic because he just really doesn't want you to be upset with him. he corners you at the end of the day, and you can't help but admit everything, even though it feels silly. but instead of teasing, he smiles and brings you to his chest, pressing a searing kiss against your lips that makes you lose all strength in your legs. "you know, i don't kiss anyone else like this," he says, as you pant for your breath. "you're the only one for me, princess."
𝐉𝐀𝐊𝐄 immediately loses all feeling when he spots you with his arch enemy, smiling at him so prettily while the latter stares at you in awe. immediately knows what you're up to when you shoot him an innocent smile once you spot him staring in the distance, and smirks at himself because, that's how it's gonna be, huh? pushes you up against the wall later on, when the two of you are alone, laughing to himself internally when you try to push him away so half-heartedly, your hand simply resting on his chest. "does your little boyfriend know you were using him to make me jealous?" you scoff, rolling your eyes, because not everything you did was about him. to this, he only hums, his lips ghosting over your skin. he smiles when you swallow a lump in your throat, breathily whispering his name when he places kisses up the column of you neck to your jaw, so he can whisper into your ear. "no? well too bad for him, i don't like sharing my pretty girl."
𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐍 panics when he sees you crying to your best friend on the phone after you spot him with his ex, accidentally overhearing the moment when you start comparing yourself to her, how she's so much prettier, so much better for him, and how there's no way you can compete with her. he can't stand seeing you so insecure, when in his eyes, there was no competition─you were it for him, and that was the end of the story. he marches over to where you're curled up in a ball under the bleachers. your eyes widen in shock at seeing him, panic flooding your features. but you have no time to question how much he heard, when he suddenly grabs your face in his palms and kisses you dumb right there and then because how dare you talk so little about yourself? you're in shock, because weren't the two of them getting back together? or so, that was what you heard anyway. "no we're not and we never will," sunghoon replies. "because i only want you."
𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐎𝐎 gets along with everyone, and that just happens to include the girls that you've never liked, and whom have never liked you. but if he knew that was the case, he would have stayed well away from them. when they notice you walk into the room, frowning as you spot sunoo with them, they get cocky thinking they have something over you. they flirt with him, giggling at everything he says, before one of them loudly fawns over how buff he is getting. that is the last straw for you, and you immediately excuse yourself from the room, not wanting to see anymore of it. but sunoo is hot on your heels, chasing you down until he catches up to you. "hey, what's wrong?" he asks, to which you scoff, saying that nothing is wrong, and that he should go back to those girls instead. but, "why would i?" he asks. and when you're left speechless, he smiles, before grabbing your hand in his and leading you away. "they're not you."
𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐖𝐎𝐍 hadn't anticipated you'd run into each other at the mall, but he's glad for it, because unlike you, he immediately becomes aware of the way a group boys eye you up and down in the distance. it only becomes more irritating when they seem to be laughing among each other, bumping shoulders and watching as you walk out of the dressing room, looking much too pretty for your own good as you try a new dress on. he instantly walks up to you, bringing you in by the neck for a deep kiss, his hand laid possessively on your waist. "sorry, baby," he says, buy not looking sorry at all, when he sees how the petname effects you. "you're just too pretty to leave alone." but you instantly catch on to what's happening, and tell him that he was awfully jealous for someone who wasn't even officially your boyfriend. to which he says, "i thought it was obvious? you're mine, and i'm yours."
𝐍𝐈-𝐊𝐈 doesn't get jealous, but he does hate the feeling of being the one left out of the loop─which is exactly what is happening right now, with the way you and one of your close guy friends keep exchanging looks that make you giggle and hit his arm, telling him to knock it off. he watches as your friend gives you teasing looks, and for what? he doesn't know. "you guys seem close," he says after your friend finally leaves, to which you tease him, asking if he's jealous. and at this point, he sighs in exasperation, because, "you already know i am." and when you're stunned into silence, he can't help but smirk, because "why are you so quiet all of a sudden?" he leans closer, towering over you, loving the way he's the one making you flustered and not someone else. "everyone except you knows i'm down bad."
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