#and now i could just say fuck it and defend it in september and it would make my life so much easier. but my voice teacher wants me

[widevibratobitch]

im so fucking mad at myself at my mother at her dead husband at god fucking knows what. "concentrate on yourself" well i cant can i. now more than anything i should and i cant. losing my fucking mind istg

[coffincestuous]

kit9 progress report #9

happy september!!! progress report time!!

to start, we’re given these images:

ashley doesn’t look her best here :( she’s pissed off. there are bags under her eyes. she has a bruise on her face (or blood?). this is not a girl who is having a good time

then we have… this? we’re back to the woods!! i wonder who Square Head and Cone Head are?? i wonder what ashley SAID!!! and what’s with the colorful flowers at the bottom??

(not to mention, they could totally sacrifice these people, and pretty easily too!)

next, we finally have some development progress reporting from kit9!! apparently episode 3A is super long & they’re trying to find a place to end the episode and start another one (4), but they haven’t been able to. they’re adding another several months to their estimated release date, which was previously “sometime in 2024” and is now “sometime in 2025… maybe”

they say, once again, that episode 3 (A and B) will be bigger and longer than episodes 1 and 2 combined, so episode releases won’t be as quick as they had been previously

finally, we have an episode three preview clip!!! it’s titled “voicemails” and the thumbnail is julia on the phone

a summary of the video for those who don’t want to watch, or can’t:

julia and andrew are in julia’s room. she tells him to listen to the voicemails she’s been getting on a daily basis. he declines, saying he’s “had [his] fill,” but julia insists

julia thinks that they’re from ashley, but she doesn’t know for sure because the voice is distorted. the voicemails contain graphic descriptions of julia’s “oncoming, painful and slow death” and then talk about how andrew would rather have sex with ashley than with julia. julia is disappointed in andrew’s lack of reaction to the upsetting content of the voicemails, and implies that he was previously upset about julia receiving these messages, but now he doesn’t care

she brings up the fact that she thinks ashley is sending these messages to her, pointing out that only ashley would use the word “floozy,” and andrew (probably lying) denies thinking that ashley has sent these.

julia disagrees, asking if he really thinks that some girl from college is pretending to be his sister and claiming that they’re a little too close, just to get julia to break up with him? he counters with “it’s working, isn’t it?” julia again disagrees, saying that she really does think that ashley is sending these messages. andrew then mentions that people teased him and ashley in high school for “keeping it in the family.” julia says that his relationship with ashley can seem incestuous, to which andrew reacts by slamming the phone back on the receiver, and getting really pissed at julia

julia gets scared of him, which makes him backtrack very quickly and clairify that he’s upset that julia would “think so lowly” of him. he says that he thinks she’s a wonderful person, while she thinks that he’s a “piece of shit” who “probably fucks his sister.”

julia then starts crying, denies thinking that he and ashley are having sex, and apologizes for starting a fight. andrew hugs her and says it’s fine, it wasn’t a fight, but he’ll “forgive her” either way

finally, andrew decides that they should “stay in after all” and it ends with julia saying she forgets what she even wanted to talk to andrew about

it’s fun to see andrew’s more… “genuine” side, even if he’s kind of an asshole. i guess “authentic” is a better term there. i think there’s an interesting contrast between how he acts with julia versus how he acts with ashley, and i’m so glad that we get to see more of him and julia!!! his lack of reaction to the threats against julia is so, so telling. it makes me think back to the part of episode 2 where andrew can bring ashley into the cult party and the cultist calls ashley a bitch and he immediately gets in the cultist’s face to defend her. there are some similarities between how he acts when he has upset each girl, but he doesn’t excessively compliment ashley when they fight. he doesn’t have to worry about ashley crying when he’s rough with her. he doesn’t have to worry about ashley breaking up with him because they’re not dating and she’s his sister

(chosen family is just as valid as blood family, but with andrew and ashley, their codependency shines)

i love how manipulative andrew is. don’t get me wrong, i’d absolutely hate him irl, but i love him as a character. he’s an asshole. he’s charming. he knows what to say to get people (like julia) to feel guilty of accusing him of something he’s thought about on more than one occasion. he knows that if he acts mad towards julia, that she’ll start fawning and apologizing, and he uses that to his advantage. he is not normal (affectionate)

and i’m glad we get solid “proof” that andrew is just as bad as ashley. before, people have argued that there’s plausible deniability, but now?? omgggg. especially when he’s hugging her, saying to julia the things he wishes he could say to ashley instead… they make me crazy. absolutely insane. i am so fucking excited for episodes 3 and 4

[aroihkin]

When A Narcissist Dies: The Disturbing Reality of Dying Narcissists

So the other day I replied to a screenshot of an “anon” ask that was trying to guilt me for not publicly reacting to someone named Ardeth dying.

Ardeth was one of the people, and the main person involved, in labor trafficking me for 8 years. They had been my best friend for years before that, but as soon as they got me to move in with them, they started cutting me off from all outside friends and help, and then took their mask off. I was at their beck and call 24/7, never allowed to sleep for more than 4 hours, did every bit of labor in the house for three people, eight cats, and a giant dog, and was constantly threatened with being thrown out on the street over the smallest and stupidest things. (Seriously, one time I was ‘kicked out’ because I’d laughed at an episode of Archer in my bedroom. Amazing.)

Ardeth flew off the handle at every perceived slight, IRL and online. They even flew off the handle if they didn’t think I was defending them sufficiently hard from slights by other people. They’d throw things at both myself and their disabled S/O, threaten that if they could get out of bed they’d beat whichever of us made them mad at that moment, threaten to just die (funny now, not so much when I cared about them), the whole nine yards!

I got away from them some years ago, and moved in with the ex roommates I often call “the children” on here. (They’ve since claimed to have only been friends with me out of pity, very cool and normal of them and not at all childlike!)

Anyway, while I lived with them they gleefully experimented on my health (and got caught once in a while), and have since bragged about it. They tried to con me into giving them my car for free after they knew they were going to leave but hadn’t told me yet, and for years they made happy use of my stuff and my skills.

When they left, they left every speck of trash and all their things behind in the house, doubling “my” stuff after crying ceaselessly to strangers behind my back about how hard it was living with a hoarder. Never said shit to me IRL before saying they were moving out, btw. Cool!

I took this video in case there was legal trouble later with the landlord or whatever, and kept it to myself. But hell with it, enjoy!

(I didn’t even ask them to clean out their shit and trash, they offered and volunteered and said right up to the end that they were going to do that. Whatever, obviously just a final ploy? And what a weird one at that? They stayed as Friendly As Could Be while here in person, probably so I’d keep giving them rides to things, like to pick up their new van. Whatever, I guess I’m fucking terrifying or something.)

Anyway, they fucked off in September 2017. Seven years ago, keep that in mind, because they and their buddies have dropped in on my tumblr fairly regularly ever since then, for some reason. I usually just roll my eyes and delete their messages, because, you know, some of us have other shit going on in our lives and they don’t live rent free in my head like I apparently live in theirs.

Around March, after Ardeth died, one of them dropped into my askbox on here to tell me. K. Already knew, already processed, didn’t care to react in public, delete!

Then the other day, the ask I replied to trying to... IDK, score some kind of moral points or something? because I hadn’t chatted about it in public and thus didn’t care?

But here’s the funny thing, this means they had to go scouring through seven or eight months of my fuckin tumblr to see if I’d ever replied or talked about it. Seven years after they moved out. What the fuck lmaaaaaaaaao

Ultimately, they’re right, I don’t care. And just as I said there, I’ll care even less when it’s them.

And I fully mean that, because I won’t even know? Probably? Like, I still had some contacts in common with Ardeth, but I don’t think I do with the children, and I don’t spare them a thought 99.9% of the time except on labor day (anniversary of my starting to live on my own, fuck yeah!) and sometimes when I’m doing something they’d hate, like naming a car. And then I have myself a little giggle. Imagine when I name my fuckin house! It’s going to be like an inside joke with myself by default, and I love that for me.

...Also, no, talking about that last ask a few days later doesn’t really count. This is me being amazed and amused at them scouring months of my tumblr looking for... IDK, anything. Seven years later. Fucking hilarious TBH.

And yeah, I know it’s them or their pals, because while they think they are VERY clever, no one else who knew Ardeth and myself would call them by their RP character name from one MMO, and feel the need to go ‘anon’ in my inbox. But dumb children are gonna be dumb children forever, I guess.

Enjoy shitting fire out of sheer rage, kiddos. I’ve shut off anons since it’s just donation requests and you lot as of late, but feel free to make lots of sock puppet accounts for me to laugh at and block cuz ya’all’re that mad and sad. 💕

Seven years of stalking, man. Yeah, I was the worst. You can tell I'm just awful, out here living my life, paying on my house, racking up raises at work, and not going out looking for ex buddies to stalk and harass. Truly diabolical of me.

Oh! While I’m at it, here’s exactly 1 year later in that same house, because clearly I was the problem and thus must have still been living in filth, right? Right.

like, lmao lol rofl okay

[kaythefloppa]

MUFASA: THE LION KING LIVEBLOG/THOUGHTS [SPOILERS]

Today, Mufasa: The Lion King has released worldwide in theaters. Within the hours of being unleashed upon the world as the latest entry in the Lion King franchise and in the Disney movie lineup, the movie has become available online.

As someone who has been anticipating this film since the day it was greenlit in September of 2020, now I can finally watch it to see if it was worth the hype, if it succeeds my expectations, or if it sucks (it does not).

Also, I should preface this by saying that I am not walking in semi-blind. I was not immune to spoilers, some of which I voluntarily exposed myself to, others were stumbled upon without any warning or disclaimer, but this is still my full thoughts on the film as I watch it for the first time in proper.

SPOILERS BELOW.

I think anyone and their grandma can see Pride Rock next to the Disney castle in the opening. It's not really much to say, but in this movie specifically, I smile noticing it.

It was announced that the film would pay tribute to James Earl Jones in the opening. I was not surprised by that, and I definitely shouldn't be surprised hearing his archived recordings in the opening but... goddamn.

LEBO M HOW I HAVE MISSED YOU. Much like in the original and Simba's Pride, he is the first voice you hear in the story and god it fits.

A lot of people have pointed out how unlike the 2019 remake of TLK, this film has a wide array in emotions, expressions, and life, focusing more on actually being an animated story rather than being a nature documentary (eat it John Favereau). This entire opening solidifies that fact and I think this bears repeating as to what one of this film's biggest strengths are.

SIMBA HOW I HAVE MISSED YOU!!!!!!!!

People have made comparisons to Narnia and Jungle Book when it comes to everything the remake got wrong. I'm making those comparisons to praise this movie specifically, I'm getting those vibes.

Nala is out here doing what we all should be doing; Touching grass.

Also Simba and Nala really be out here making long distance work. I love them so f*cking much and I hate hate hate how we're not going to see much of them in the story [for reasons that are perfectly valid, especially if you know how the movie ends which... we'll get to that]

I listened to the soundtrack before watching this film; It slaps so much. It's everything you would want in a theatrical Lion King sequel, so hearing it in the ACTUAL movie, that's astonishing.

Oh look... Timon and Pumbaa are here. Which is nice cause I'm a huge fan of Timon and Pumbaa (I stand by the fact that Lion King 3 is arguably the most god-tier of all Disney sequels) but.... Seth Rogan warthog..

"And that one three-legged zebra." Fuck that's actually pretty dark and I love it.

Kiara exists in this film. I was at first upset that they were retreading earlier ground but... I'm cool with it now. Not exactly what I would've done, but I can nod heads with it.

I get that Timon and Pumbaa overexaggerate things (a later joke in the film would confirm that) but I don't see why Simba is against the idea of them telling her stories. I think any child would be okay with that, even with the circumstances happening. Then again, this could be an indicator of Simba's paranoia and fearing that Kiara could go through the same thing. Jesus, no matter what universe this guy is in he is still traumatized, got-damn.

Oh wait I take it back I fucking love that Kiara is in this film, she is adorable.

Simba really had a glow-up from having a kid.

We all knew that Timon and Pumbaa fighting Scar in the trailers was just them fucking around, so I don't need to comment more on this. I will point out how one of my predictions for the remake was seeing Pumbaa defend Simba from Scar seeing as how warthogs can often square up against lions in real life. So, even in the context of a Timon and Pumbaa joke that makes zero sense, I'm still vindicated.

As someone who had an INTENSE fear of thunder and lightning as a child and.... still has somewhat of an aversion thereof as an adult, I can very much resonate with Kiara's reaction to the storm.

"We sing that song for 6 years straight." I'm going to ignore that line just so that I can continue to headcanon Lion King characters aging by humans (I am coping and seething rn)

RAFIKI HOW I HAVE MISSED YOU.

Rafiki in this film reminds me of my grandfather I cannot stop smiling every time he goes on screen, I want to hug him.

"Ceremonial birthing grounds" Holy SHIT I was not expecting such lore early on. Bravo Berry Jenkins.

John Kani is KILLING this role as Rafiki. I would easily use this as another opportunity to dunk the remake but I'm too distracted by how good this performance is and how it fits the character so well. I'm the furthest thing from a Disney shill, but I would unoequivcally watch a four-season prequel spin-off series about Rafiki if one ever came out, and I have this goddamn movie to blame.

This is gonna be a running theme but Rafiki has some of the best lines in this movie. What the fuck was Jenkins smoking and can I have it? /pos.

They played the This Land theme whilst Kiara talks about how she could never be brave like her granddad and father. The parallels....

Aand here we go, Mufasa backstory time! I mean, you'd have to ignore the three existing backstories that already exist but then again, all of them suck ass," so here we fucking goooooooo.

I really dislike when movies use "moons" as a time indicator because like, what does that mean? Does it literally mean a lunar cycle of nearly 30 days? Months? Years? I'm thinking way too much into this aren't I?

YEAAAH TITLE CARD BABEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYY. WE ARE SO FUCKEN BAACK.

Goddamn I remember that one frame of Mufasa and his parents being released and it was so stupid. It looks even dumber seeing it to motion but damn it it looks so cute in a way!

Aww, look at how much Mufasa loves his parents. I hope these characters survive all the way to the end of the film without any major catastroph-yeah no, I can't even fucking finish it.

Milele is a good enough song with the vocals, but the visuals are really what hammer it home for me. The wide arrays of gold, pinks, purples, and greens, it brings life into this world, showcases the beauty of Africa, and emphasizes the dreamy aspect of the song. Also, you get Keith motherf*cking David singing in a Lion King movie, game respects game.

Also the T(He)y Lives in You reference was very well put together.

Mufasa chasing a butterfly being a reference to Kiara chasing a butterfly in Simba's Pride!!

I already knew Mufasa's father was gonna die in this but seeing him play with Mufasa, goddamn you Disney. Your never-ending patricide may be predictable, but it will never not tug my heart-strings.

I don't know who this giraffe is but I love them already.

Man, we've really come a long way since Simba's blank expression at the stampede, huh? Nature is fucking healing.

DAM(N)

Bisexual lighting in the water spotted.

You can hear Nants Ingonyama when Mufasa is submerged underwater! Deep cut.

Honestly, the hippos just glancing at Mufasa and swimming past him is hilariously dickish and it makes me forgive how they haven't immediately chomped him /j

Here's Taka (UGGGGGHHH ~ Sorry, I had to get that one out, they could've chosen any other name for him)

From day 1, Scar has always been a little shit lmao.

This doesn't mean anything on any scale, but I would've replaced the crocodiles with hippos. Would've been more scary.

Taka getting Mufasa up is directly contrast to how he will eventually kill him. This movie is going to try and yank my heart-strings out of my chest won't it?

"All important nap of kings." Bro's just like me fr.

Oh wait god I take it all back he's not like me fr HE'S NOT LIKE ME FR.

If I had a nickel for every recent piece of Lion King media that depicts cannibalism with the subtlety of a chainsaw to the pelvis, I'd have 2 nickels, which isn't a lot but WHY THE FUCK DO I HAVE 2 FUCKING NICKELS?!?!?! TWO!?!?

"Do you know what Mufasa means? It means King!" Erhm actually, Mufasa has no direct meaning in Swahili. It's a mix between Mfalme (which is the direct Swahili translation for "King" and the last pre-colonial King of Buganda called Mutisa. Obasi's clearly got his lions crossed. *cinemasins ding*

I love how Mufasa is clearly laughing and joking around as this adult lion is actively trying to fucking murder him. Either he is that oblivious to the danger that he is in, or he is actively trolling this asshole. If it's the latter, or even both, I love it.

I have a feeling that Obasi has actually murdered other outsider cubs before, or maybe even succeeded in sabotaging their initiation rituals so he can eat them. I get that the whole "lions killing cubs that aren't their own" is a part of nature but apply human behavior to that and you can see how sick this is. Not to mention, Taka would have probably been in proxy to these and... shit, no wonder he turned out to be a nasty piece of work.

Oh so THIS is the challenge that Scar was mentioning in the remake.

The PTSD flashbacks jumpscared me.

Oh my god the close up of Mufasa... peak fucking fiction.

Omg that one scene in the trailer of Mufasa leaping from the tree is in the movie- aaaand he is going ass over teakettle afterwards lmao.

The little "I Always Wanted a Brother" instrumental playing when Taka helps Mufasa out of the water🥺

"You will keep him with the females" oh that's not.....

The entiredy of "I Always Wanted a Brother" is amazing. The lyrics cleverly delve into Scar and Mufasa's individual personalities and traits that'll magnify in their adulthood, as well as their growing relationship, and the visuals feel alive as ever with the chorus and beat topping it all off. Lin Manuel Miranda cooked here and I am not afraid to admit it. This song is the best in the entire movie and is everything one would look for in a Lion King prequel. No wonder the marketing loved this song so much.

Also, Mufasa: The Lion King proudly continues the tradition of A) musical numbers with background animal choreography and B) transitions to show characters aging. We truly have come full Circle [Of Life]

Ok but this entire song is way funnier when it's essentially these animals saying "Get your ass back home" to these two little shits.

"Some things you chase but you cannot hold." That line is DEFINITELY a double-meaning and applies to both brothers. For Taka, it refers to how he can't keep/gain the power he obtains + the object of his desires as much as he tries and for Mufasa, it means he won't be able to maintain the relationship with his adoptive brother. The failure to practice this philosophy leads to both of their downfalls so what is at first a cute lyric becomes very dark in retrospect and I have to applaud the songwriter if he was intentional with that.

Ok so if Obasi doesn't allow outsiders and since he values blood and all, then I'm assuming these other male lions are related to him. I'm gonna guess that they're his brothers and/or cousins.

The animals singing in a circle around Mufasa and Taka reminds me a lot of high school dance circles, it's very funny (and also sweet that the animals and Taka are singing for Mufasa).

You heard of the boy who cried wolf; Well here's the lion who cried elephant. (Also, 10/10 prank).

"They did it [the prank] again!" I think the saying goes, "fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me." Also I was half-expecting an ACTUAL elephant stampede to knock them down, ;p

"You want to be with the females?" I have no jokes for this, I am legitimately disgusted with how mysoginistic Obasi is and yeah, that's definitely the point, but like, I was NOT expecting that. I guess maybe they needed to emphasize how Taka had such a shitty role model growing up and that a large part of his fall to darkness was not learning how sick and wrong this line of thinking is, and objectively that is good writing when handling such a topic, especially since again, the movie is very much against this and to a lesser degree, it's an origin story I guess I'm just taken by surprise at the sudden mysoginy, and at the end of the day, did we really need this character to be a PodcastBro™ to get the idea that he's not supposed to be someone we root for? Or is it really not that deep and I'm thinking too much into this?

Eshe is such a good mother to Mufasa, helping him home into his senses to hunt, and even offering to help Mufasa find his parents. I think this is a good contrast between Mufasa and Taka when it comes to the nurture part of nature vs. nurture. It's also an interesting mirror to the fan-portrayals of their relationships with their parents as it's usually Taka/Scar being close to his mother and Mufasa being close to his father.

I see a lot of Tarzan similarities here and I think you can notice them well. That being said, Tarzan is also peak fiction that I look fondly towards, and this movie is also looking really good so far, so there is nothing but adoration.

Timon and Pumbaa reacting to Mufasa's line of being a stray with no responsibilities, calling him "one of us" all but confirms that if he was still alive today, they would 100% be friends.

"Hakuna Mufasa" essentially means "There is no Mufasa." I.e. what a good chunk of Simba's childhood was like. Shit, I'm pretty sure Rafiki even knew the fucked up implications of that when he interrupted them.

Timon and Pumbaa I love you but please shut the fuck up right now.

I think everyone has made the Kimba jokes, so I'm just going to say how two white lions would NOT stand out in a sea of tall tannish green grass.

This entire hunting scene is the definition of tension. No dialogue, just music.

Oh, the trailers outright baited us into thinking Eshe was gonna sacrifice herself to save Mufasa. Well played Disney.... well played.

Damn, Taka is horrified as shit.

Go for the juglar Mufasa! The jugular!!

The framing of the scene goes by quick, but I think the implication is that Kiros's son got straight up impaled by one of the branches on the dead tree when Mufasa knocked him down... we're only half an hour into this 2 hour film and we already have a kill count of 3 characters, one of which by the titular.

Ngl, I was hoping/expecting Mufasa to be the aggressor in the fight to try and scare off the lions and this would be how he learns that "being brave doesn't mean you go looking for trouble." And/or that Eshe potentially sacrificing herself would be what gives him that reality check. But either way, as is, this fight scene did demonstrate bravery as a quality of Mufasa in a good way.

"I owe you a great debt" yeah you also owe him an apology for refusing to take any parental custody over him, for the emotional neglect, for your misogyny-driven alienation of him, and oh yeah, trying to FUCKING CANNIBALIZE HIM.

I mean in fairness to the white lion, what the fuck was he supposed to do? Mufasa LITERALLY impaled Sachu.

Obasi lying to protect Taka reminds me of Rameses offering to lie to absolve Moses of his murder. Also, once again, this scene does very well to point out how Taka's upbringing played a role in his eventual fall from grace without making him an abused woobie stripped of any character.

I was gonna complain about how the Outsiders are a thing in this movie but the fact that they are evidently not Zira's pride and also have an explanation to their existence makes it hard to complain.

Ok so the first act of the film is kinda rushed, I'll admit that. Guess they had to go on the journey pretty quick.

So far, Timon and Pumbaa's commentary has ranged from somewhat funny to cringeworthy. Why exactly are they involved in this plot? Or, if they had to be, why not Sarabi and Zazu who actually partook in this story we're being told. You could get alot of colorful dynamics that would add both extra comedy and emotion to the story. I'm getting this out of the way now because even though there's a later scene that is juxstaposed to this, it still confuses me a bit.

"Yours is the last pride of the valley of kings" woah, that actually means Kiros has killed other prides before. This is straight up the lion equivalent of imperialism.

"Everything the light touches belongs to me," well what about when it's dark out? Ever thought of that, asshole? Obasi could easily lawyer up and kick your ass back to the swamp /j

"There will be one ruler. One, Lion King." He said it, he said the thing!

Not gonna lie, Kiros's villain song, Bye-Bye sounds like it was pulled from Jake and the Never Land Pirates. But then again, that show's soundtrack is fucking awesome, as is this film's soundtrack, as is this song. The vocals and lyrics are deliciously villainous and the beat is haunting. My only gripe is that it's too short, and the movie's version of the song doesn't include the background vocals like the soundtrack version. That and the visuals aren't as stunning as I imagined but, still, it's a good villain song! And for a song titled "Bye-Bye" of all things that is a feat.

Man, I thought I was actually gonna see Kiros kill Obasi and Eshe. I mean it's obvious that he did but, showing it on screen would've really hammered home the idea that he doesn't mess around. But instead we smash cut to the brothers running away. LAME!!!!!!!

"They live in you now" oh that hits so hard.

Aquaphobic Mufasa canon???

"It's not my fault crocodiles are simply attracted to you," tell me why my mind instantly went to a visual of Pua x Mufasa (and why I can somehow buy that???)

"My scent? I've been stalking you two all night." Sarabi how I have missed you.

ZAZU HOW I HAVE MISSED YOU.

Sarabi royalty confirmed.

I once saw a theory that Rafiki (a mandrill) was raised by baboons, which explains why he has no qualms with being called one, and gives a new perspective to his phrase "you're a baboon, and I'm not." To whoever came up with that theory, you are a goddamn prophet.

Again, I think all of this goes by way too fast, I think a few more minutes establishing this troop along with Rafiki's character traits and behaviors and THEN hitting us with the tragic fall-out would've worked a lot better.

"Born with a leg that does not work," that explains the walking stick he has in the movie.

"It was Rafiki who found water in the dry season!" Six New Adventures reference!

Rafiki is fucking hilarious.

''A single stick may smoke, but it will never burn." Once again, Rafiki is the best fucking character in this entire film.

Did... Zazu just break the fourth wall???

"I am not a baboon. I am a mandrill." It took us 30 fucking years for a Lion King movie to address this, god bless.

"No offense, but a monkey is a monkey," Mufasa racist moment /j

Rafiki and Mufasa's discussion at the pool is so good. Once again, it has that natural Lion King narrative DNA in it and it speaks a lot about both characters as part of an origin story. Both characters are very heavy key players in the classic Lion King stroy, so this scene does them a GREAT deal of justice.

"I have a report! It's morning." Ok, funny joke.

"Hallucinating baboon!" Sarabi racist moment /j

This plot really knows how to connect together, via using Eshe's sensory training to help dodge Kiros's team.

We Go Together is an amazing song. It's very good for a road-trip/buddy movie, and, not unlike Hakuna Mtata from the original, is a very good palatte cleanser from the story's more darker elements. The characters have enough time to shien in their own ways and the overlaps of their lyrics is kinda growing on me. I substract points for the stupid-ass love triangle bit they imply and trust me, we will get to that when we get to that.

You know that one scene in kids' shows and movies where it is nothing but unabashed second-hand embarassment and/or cringe. The entire scene where Mufasa gives Taka love advice for Sarabi, and Taka's attempts to kiss-up to her is exactly that. If it's not completely uncomfortable to listen to, it's BO-RING. And I wish it was just a one-off gag that meant fuck-all in the end but I've listened to the soundtrack and got spoilered on a later element in the film that just does not help.

Seeing the elephant herd reminds me of when my sister and I were in Africa and saw an entire herd, moms and their babies pass by. On that same vacation, my grandpa and I also saw an elephant pass the road. Huge disclaimer, never piss them off.

Sarabi rendered an entire colony of bees homeless and more than likely killed a good amount of elephants by getting them stung. That's not very Circle of Life of her.

Mufasa saving Sarabi's life!! That man is her HUSBAND.

Ah yes, the epic tale of Rafiki's stick. The mythos of the stick has finally been revealed. This is the REAL Lion King lore I signed up for. Barry Jenkins you are too good.

On one hand Mufasa lying to make Taka look good is an interesting character study. On the other hand.... that stupid fucking love triangle that this builds up to. I hate it so much, SO MUCH. Replace the payoff with ANYTHING ELSE, and I'd be okay with this. Ugh!

Rafiki, Kiara, Timon, and Pumbaa's hug is great. Rafiki explaining the sad reality of social alienation, relating it to his experiences, followed up by Timon and Pumbaa lightening the mood but adding to that emotion with them being outsiders. I knew it wouldn't be long until I started to love them being in this film. Take your crown you kings, you earned it!

Oh my god Mufasa has hella PTSD here, it's a really good representation of it.

Zazu's a real one here, covering up the tracks.

I. Fucking. Love. Rafiki.

"Mufasa, I gotch'u." I headcanon those were Sarabi's wedding vows. No one can prove me wrong.

I thought Mufasa and Sarabi's romance would be a bit rushed here and to be fair... it almost does??? It's not the whole center of the story, and Sarabi is able to stand out as a character on her own outside of the love story. As for their love story itself, it's very well put together with enough screentime and it feels real. Oh and their love song is also pretty great. We were WELL overdue with a Mufasa/Sarabi love song and this movie did not fail to deliver.

Also, Sarabi figuring out on her own that Mufasa saved her and being able to pick up on all of his genuinely best qualities, that's like really impressive, and it's actually a neat twist on the 'liar revealed' trope.

Okay, now here's my allotted time to talk about one of the things I was dreading seeing in this film and am unfortunate enough to be right seeing. The stupid Mufasa/Scar/Sarabi love-triangle. I hate it. I hate how one of the only major changes the remake had to its story was adding that love triangle to give 'depth' to the characters, when in reality, it diminished the characters by not having more for the story to speak about them, made the tension between them flat by consequence, and the remake never resolves this in a meaningful way. Plus it is BORING as hell. And now the movie is apparently using that same love triangle once again, as a MAJOR plot-point. Not only that, but the fact that Taka immediately snaps and goes villain after seeing his crush go after his brother... what the hell are ya even doing man?

The first act of the film gives us a lot of elements to go off of for his villain arc. Being spoiled by his parents, poor parental influence, being a control freak, maybe we see more signs that Taka blames Mufasa for his parents getting killed, or holds him responsible for it, or heck, even his guilt/inferiority complex that stems from the trauma of running away when his mother was in a life-or-death situation. So many other things that could result in a complex but constructive beginnings of a villain, and yet it's this stupid underbaked love triangle, this one isolated moment that changes the trajectory of his entire character arc and oh my god I hate it, I hate it so much. Nevertheless, Brother Betrayed is a good song.

Seeing Taka throw a tantrum over his crush not liking him back and later falling into the snow is cathartic as hell. I want to see this little turd lose.

So he teams up with the white lions... after they killed both his parents and caused him to be banished from his home... not to mention, they tried to kill him?? Unless he's tricking them somehow so he could get close enough to take them out, this is incredibly stupid. I don't care if this snivelling little shit gets punched in the face, but also as is, this is bad writing.

Taka laying out scars to lead the villains to their location. Now THAT is clever foreshadowing.

Pumbaa your husband is right next to you, why are you pretending not to like love 😭😭😭

That is a cool ass background.

The shots of the Pride Lands matching the visions of Milele. This movie knows how to use its visuals.

Man I remember all the theories saying that the big tree in Milele was the Tree of Life from the Lion Guard, or that somehow Milele was always Mufasa's adopted home. Still, magnificent.

I think all of us could predict Rafiki and Mufasa having a brotherly bond. I like how the theme of this movie involves family in ways other than biological relation. I think the brotherhood theme could've been used with Zazu as well, but this is sooooooo cuuuteee!!!

Wait how do the animals know the Outsiders are hunting Mufasa? Did the Outsiders terrorize Milele before? Did they somehow 'sense' the Outsiders' presence like Eshe taught Mufasa to? I like where this is going but there's no reason for them to have that much frame of reference to our protagonists' plight.

Kiros is truly horrifying.

"There are other lions here," wait, so maybe they're members of Sarabi's pride? Hmmm....

"Sarabi chose you... just like my mother, just like my own father." Uhm,,, what??? Obasi never 'chose' Mufasa for anything over Taka. And Mufasa was assigned to Eshe by Obasi. Sure, the dude may have looked Mufasa in a higher regard after the rescue but that is NOT the equivalent of preference? In fact, the very last thing Obasi said to Taka was to preserve the bloodline by outright lying to everyone. Did I miss something??

Hell yeah fight fight fight.

Is... IS THAT SARAFINA AND A YOUNG NALA IN THE PRIDE LANDS??? HOLY SHIT.

Mufasa uniting the animals together in a war rally... PEAK FICTION. This entire speech is peak levels of badass.

Mufasa said Nants ingonyama bagithi. The opening lines to Circle of Life HOLY FUCK BARRY JENKINS COOKED.

Only a villain like Kiros can make the phrase "Bye-Bye" sound menacing.

Zazu be out here using 0.001% of his full power.

W shoebill character (still sad that there's no caracal yet).

I think Zazu could offer a lot more in the final battle, like say, rallying the birds together and raining hell upon the lionesses, poking them with sticks or dropping rocks. He's gotten a decent enough amount of screentime but this climax should've really brought it home.

BEAT HIS ASS MUFASA. BEAT. HIS. MOTHER. FUCKING. ASS.

Okay, fine, give Taka some brownie points for standing in the way, but he still fucking deserves that scar. Fuck you Taka.

Also, the remake implies that Mufasa gave Scar his scar in the challenge, but it never outright said so, and TLK has always been a loose cannon when it came to... well, canon; So I can buy Kiros giving him the scar. I actualy can't believe that my prediction on Taka taking the bullet for Mufasa actually came true! Mark that off the bingo card!!!

The entire climax/stand-off/showdown has little to no dialogue and BY GOD does it ever work here. Mufasa and Taka looking at each other with clear emnity in their eyes, and then channeling all of their rage into their common foe to tag-team him. So much emotion.

"The earth will shake." LET. HIM. COOK.

And scratch "Pride Rock being formed by and earthquake that crushes the villain" off the bingo card.

Mufasa overcoming his water trauma by remembering Eshe's words to sense the rock that he'll use to crush Kiros into the water.

Ok y'all say it with me: Bye Bye Kiros!

I know this is a big emotional moment that shows the last of Taka's humanity and parallels with his first and last encounter with Mufasa.... but the HESITATION to help him, mixed with the clear anger at the beginning would've been enough to make me banish the dick.

See, Mufasa became king after proving his worth of leadership. There is no "he stole the throne/his brother's girlfriend" BS. You Buzzneed nerd-wannabees can fuck off now.

Oh look, I see some hyenas in the crowd. I wonder what their origin stories will be in this Lion King prequel!

"No more Kings, we are all one," setting aside TLK 2 reference, Mufasa is based for implying a democracy.

Are.... are you FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!?!?! AFIA IS ALIVE???!!! MUFASA'S MOM IS ALIVE!?!?! WHAT THE FUCK?!?!!

Ok I'm conflicted. On one end, I don't like the fake-out death trope, especially when it's used at the end of films. On the other hand... Afia's presence really ties the themes and plot of 'Milele' together and it ~ really works. But still, imagine if Mufasa was visited by the spirit of his mother after becoming king, mirroring Mufasa's later divine intervention for his son. That would've worked so much better. Wasted potential af.

Also, if Afia's alive... who was the lion in the stars Mufasa saw during "I Always Wanted a Brother."

Oh... OH. OH GOD. MY HEART. R.I.P. MASEGO.

Whilst I still think keeping Afia dead would've been more effective, leaving Masego dead and keeping her alive adds an element of tragedy into the story, and the "He Lives in You" callback is well-equipped here.

Fuck you Taka you little shit.

I always took issue with the remake's backstory for Scar implying that he got his scar in a fight with Mufasa; Because if Scar already challenged Mufasa once, why does Mufasa trust him enough to depend on him or let his son romp around the place near him, even if he sticks around bc of "brotherhood." Whilst I don't mind that the remake 'retconned' that story (especially since it wasn't confirmed), I still take issue with that here; Again, if Taka had lied to Kiros, or did something to indicate that he wasn't on his side/wasn't truly against Mufasa, or if Taka could lie his way out of consequences, it would work, but as is, this just feels... off.

Also, Scar calling himself scar as a reminder of his embarassment and what he did, despite him continuing to do awful things rendering that admission completely null and void; it sucked when the books did it, it sucks here.

Maybe the real Milele were the friends we made along the way.

Mufasa's coronation is powerful, and blends well with Kiara's ascension. My only problem is the same problem I had with the remake. The roar came TOO EARLY. In the original's King of Pride Rock, Simba's ascension was concurrent with the swelling of the music, reaching its peak when he reached Pride Rock's peak, and then when Simba roared, that's when the music delved into Busa, which meshed into the reprise of Circle of Life. The remake fucks that up badly, and Mufasa, whilst still better in terms of that detail in pacing, still manages to miss that mark. So close... and yet so far...

Kiara can now Skype call her grandfather. The Circle is now truly complete.

"Kiara, this is your new brother." I... was kinda hoping the film would end with Simba and Nala adopting a new cub and said cub would bond with Kiara the way that Mufasa and Taka used to, and that said cub would be a girl but........ fine, fine. Also, I am 99% sure that cub is Kion. With how Disney recently uploaded The Lion Guard: Return of the Roar onto their YouTube channel in honor of Mufasa, and with how next year is The Lion Guard's 10th anniversary, meaning they'd HAVE to make another large acknowledgement of it, I am more than definitely subscribing to the fact that it is Kion. And... yeah I'm pretty cool with it (if it's Kopa, I will go into hibernation).

Kiara telling her brother the story is a neat way to wrap up this story in a bow.

CONCLUSION:

PROS:

The animals actually emote and express in this movie. Not only that, but the backgrounds and impressive technology are allowed to go all out in strength. We have come a long way. I hope to god the animators get their rents due, especially in an era where animation and animators are constantly getting the middle finger by companies and corporations.

This movie takes a lot of good ideas and executes them brilliantly. Mufasa being an orphan, Sarabi and Zazu being a team, Taka/Scar being descended from a bloodline, the white lions, EVERYTHING about Rafiki. It truly feels original. Regardless as to whether or not it's canon, it's an interesting exploration of the world we know and love, done by people who really understand the movie.

The songs are amazing. Lin Manuel Miranda did his absolute best for them and they manage to serve the plot and characters pretty well. LMM is a pretty hit or miss guy when it comes to music. Sometimes he can flop and we get shit like Scuttlebutt, but other times he hits the bull's eye and we get stuff like Moana, Encanto, and Mufasa. He was on his A-game tonight.

The voice acting had actual direction unlike the remake. The actors had a lot of fun behind the scenes and it's very easy to tell, even without the interviews. And the singing *cheff's kiss.*

CONS:

This movie tries very hard in a lot of directions, but there are some areas where it doesn't really try hard enough. I feel like a few things were a bit underdeveloped. For example, Rafiki's exile. Just, stretch that scene out 3-4 more minutes to establish Rafiki as a character, his traits, the nature of his baboon tribe, and THEN banish him. Or Taka's relationship with Obasi, maybe do a bit more to commentate on the toxic values that Taka grew up with and how they stuck with him, maybe that is one of the things that hints to him not being worthy of the throne, compared to Mufasa's more progressive influence and proaction. Anything besides that stupid fucking love triangle. And maybe some more Sarabi/Zazu backstory, we get to truly see the closeness between them, maybe Sarabi saves Zazu, and vice versa during the climax. What they do with them is fine, but, there was room for more.

Timon and Pumbaa had some good scenes here but also some duds. At the end of the day, they provide some interesting commentary and jokes to lighten the mood but... I think their humor could've been improved upon, especially with how Pumbaa acts too much like Timon and that kinda breaks the whole idea of them being polar opposites. If Disney ever does make a live-action remake of The Lion King 3 (and you bet your ass they will)... they really gotta change how they're utilizing these two.

I know I went on about how this movie's strengths are regardless of canon, especially with how it contradicts both the original and the remake, but there were some parts where I couldn't fully suspend my disbelief, even if you shut canon out of the window. Like, the lionesses we see in the climax helping Sarabi. Is Sarafina amongst them? If not, who? If the cub isn't Nala, who is it? If the cub is Nala, why does she look like she's Simba's age, yet she looks no older than Simba when he's a grown cub? Even if you age them naturally like IRL animals, those numbers still don't add up. And the hyenas. They appear at the end during Mufasa's coronation and bow. Okay... what did they do to get banished or become enemies? I know the story couldn't have shown too much focus over them but why have them there only to gloss over it if it didn't mean much of anything? Not only that, but the hyenas fucking bow down to Mufasa. I'm sorry- BOW??? IN WHAT UNIVERSE???? IN WHAT FUCKING UNIVERSE???? What kind of KFP 4 Lord Shen bullshit is going on here? My suspension of disbelief can only go so far before it is utterly decimated😭😭

The pacing can be a bit better. Some things overall do go on too fast (which results in my first point as to how things can be undercooked, it's a sympton of the issue) or in the case of other scenes like Taka trying to rizz up Sarabi... go on for way too long. It doesn't horrifically bog down the film and there are many, many, many scenes where the pacing is to this movie's advantage, but it could do better in some areas.

Sarabi and Zazu were nowhere to be found in the present day. Unless you count one of those lionesses walking her and her son back home, but still.... HATRED. Is Sarabi not allowed to live past the TLK 1 story???? Is this Disney's subtle way of killing her off, what the FU-

Final Thoughts:

This movie was always destined to be better than The Lion King 2019, but only because of the low bar. A good concept can go along way as long as there is a good execution (there was a lot of potential for the remake, but the management of it lead to an utter waste of a film).

For years I prayed for this film not to suck - with each and every update that this film had, I would manifest that it wouldn't be shit, bare mininum - bc it's a film that SHOULDN'T suck with how good of a concept they had in their hands and how EVERYTHING for this film relied on the execution, especially coming off the heels of an awful film that, like I said, lowerred the bar below the Marianas Trench.

And, despite some of my earlier gripes, nitpicks, and critiques, - I was right.

THIS MOVIE DID NOT SUCK.

Does it have flaws? Yes. Is it perfect? No. Is it as good as the original? Definitely no. But it... it truly is something to behold, and a masterpiece nonetheless that, if anything, will not fail to entertain. With really good writing, nice songs, relatable and interesting characters, a very engaging story, and is [mostly] serviceable as an origin story for some of these characters, canon or otherwise. I am most likely gonna get a lot of people to disagree with me but that's what I stand by. Overall, worth the four year long wait (4 years, fucking really..?). At worst, it's decent, and at best, it's amazing.

FINAL RANKING: 8/10

The movie's opening weekend has only just begun, and reviews and meandering in very opposite directions, but if and when this movie does perform well, I wouldn't be surprised if this was the last time we see these characters again.

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

Lady Liberty Through The Fog

* * * *

Thats Another Fine Mess

THE GOP IS ON THEIR ASS

TCINLA

JUL 22, 2024

Captain Befuddlepants, and his sidekick, Little Shillbilly, are quaking in their boots over yesterday’s news. (Editorialk note: these are the new official names for the idiots here at TAFM.) The captain’s so upset that he doesn’t get to debate Biden again that he is now weaseling out of debating Kamala Harris in September by saying it should be held on the “fair and balanced” Fox News. The captain went on to complain that his campaign had been “forced to spend time and money” fighting Biden and now had to “start all over again” against another challenger, posting: “Shouldn’t the Republican Party be reimbursed for fraud in that everybody around Joe, including his doctors and the Fake News Media, knew he was not capable of running for, or being, President? Just askin’?”

I guess he’s changed his mind from back in 2011, when he donated $5,000 to Harris’ re-election campaign for Attorney General.

As fucking if, you ignorant asswipe.

Captain Befuddlepants is now the oldest person to ever run for president. He talks about Hannibal Lecter as if he’s a real person. So that’s the story now, right MSM?

The Little Shillbilly is also now cagey about committing to a vice presidential debate, citing uncertainty about whom he might actually end up debating.

Trump campaign advisers Chris LaCivita and Susie Wiles put out a statement: “Kamala Harris is just as much of a joke as Biden is. Harris will be even WORSE for the people of our Nation than Joe Biden. Harris has been the Enabler in Chief for Crooked Joe this entire time. They own each other’s records, and there is no distance between the two. Harris must defend the failed Biden Administration AND her liberal, weak-on-crime record in CA.”

Every other Republican fuckwit is busy losing their shit over the change in plans.

MAGA Mike Johnson went on CNN’s State of the Union where he said that the House GOP is actually thinking of investigating the inner workings of the Democratic Party:

JOHNSON: I mean, look, I didn't want to come out and talk about personal interactions with the president, because I have been concerned about what I just said, about this projection of weakness on the world stage at a very dangerous time. But now that the cat is out of the bag, you can hear from the Republican speaker to affirm what everyone else has known and seen. They -- the Democrats have been involved in a big cover-up here. They have been trying to prevent the people from seeing what all of us in close proximity have seen. He's not the Joe Biden of even four years ago when he ran for office. He's not capable of doing it now. And it's not his fault. I mean, no one can help how they age, how quickly they age and how their faculties diminish. But that's clearly happening here, and it's something that must be contended with. TAPPER: Well, calling it a cover-up, that's pretty strong words. Are you suggesting that there's something that needs to be investigated in a serious way by Congress or even law enforcement? JOHNSON: Well, that's something we have discussed. I mean, you have seen even in recent weeks, until the debate three weeks ago, I mean, top Democrats in Congress and elsewhere were coming on to television regularly and saying, Joe Biden's running circles around us, he could -- he could compete in the Olympics. I mean, it was just comical. They all knew that wasn't true. I mean, anybody who interacted with him over the last couple of years knew that that was not true. And it was -- every time I would see one of those statements, I couldn't believe they were doing it. And that is why they went through the process and got him through winning the primary, because they put up a false pretense about his capabilities. Now the whole country sees it, and they have painted themselves into a corner because they did that.

I like David Kurtz’s analysis this morning at TPM: “ It takes time to draft and hand out the new scripts and get the entire right-wing Wurlitzer cranking out the same noise ad nauseam. You saw in the flailing response yesterday from Trump on down to Fox News that they weren’t on the same page yet. They only have 15 weeks to cement new attack lines, memes, caricatures, shorthand, and conspiracy theories. That’s doable, but it’s not a lot of time to establish a drumbeat and repeat it long enough to make it accepted truth. The top-down nature of the right-wing political apparatus makes it reasonably well-positioned to turn on a dime, but repetition is key and there’s only so much time remaining to drill in a new collective viewpoint of Harris and the race.”

Rick Wilson also sees things clearly (as usual):

“There is a sense of shock rippling through the Republican party right now, greater than anything I could’ve possibly imagined a week ago. The nervous ripple in their world worsened last night as Trump began rage-posting on his Dollar Store social media platform, clearly unconstrained and uncontrolled.

“As Trump realized he’d been led astray, his keen, feral sense for the spotlight recognized that she had become a bigger story than him and that he and his team had no real Plan B.

“He could smell how consequential her entry into the race would be and how quickly attention would shift from him to a younger, faster, smarter, and more agile, camera-friendly candidate. My friend Jay Black said it well: “The Trump campaign had no plan for Biden dropping out because, on a fundamental level, nobody in Trump's world could conceive of a man willingly giving up power for the good of his country.”

“Kamala Harris is Donald Trump‘s Kryptonite.

“She is a woman of mixed race. She is attractive. She is a prosecutor. She is smarter than him by a long mile. Worst of all for Trump, he’s already envisioning the moment when she laughs in his face.

“She is what he hates the most: a woman. Don’t under-score this point when assessing his reactions. Donald Trump loathes women to the very core of his awful being, like all sexual abusers. His hatred of women springs into life in many forms, for he is abusive to them sexually, physically, verbally, and through both action and inaction. If you draw an arc from E. Jean Carroll (and his many other victims) to the Dobbs decision, you know all you must about his view of women.

“We'll witness his rage in full effect when she laughs at his grandiosity and delusion on a debate stage. One wag yesterday suggested that she greet him by saying, “Donald, I’m glad your parole officer let you come here tonight.”

Meanwhile, we Democrats are fortunate that The Most Overrated Writer On Earth, Aaron Sorkin, has decided he no longer believes the Democratic Party should select Republican Senator Mitt Romney as its candidate in the 2024 presidential race. I’m so relieved.

And we’ll cap off with the statement from the smartest Democrat in the past 60 yesars, Nancy Pelosi: “My enthusiastic support for Kamala Harris for President is official, personal and political.”

[TCinLA]

[dollywheeler]

September 28th, 1996

[Incoming call, Saturday September 28th 1996, 10:08 am]

*distant voices and laughter in the background* *sound of multiple car engines* *beeping of a car horn* E: Dusty-Bun, is that you? D: Hey, El! E: Hold on - *beep of a button being pressed* *thudding sound of a handset hitting a wooden surface*- you're on speaker! W: *mumbled* Good morning- *stifled yawn* or afternoon or whatever D: How was the game? *sound of someone shuffling into the room* M: *far away but getting closer* You’d know if you were here, asshole!

D: It’s called work, Michael. We can’t all have weekends off. M: Yeah, right, because an all-expenses paid trip is such a slag. D: You’re just jealous! *ring of a bicycle bell* D: You’ll never guess where I’m calling from. M: If you say the toilet again, I swear- D: That was a mind-boggling experience, jackass! You should have been more appreciative! M: We’ve been using walkie’s since fifth grade, dude, pretty sure you’ve called us while taking a shit before. D: I wasn’t in another state then! We’re not even on the same continent right now and - *motorcycle in the background getting louder before receding again* W: Just tell us where you’re at, Dustin. D: Fine - I'm in front of La Sagrada Familia! M: So you’re looking at a construction site? I’m sooooo envious- D: You so are! Both of my trip and my sexy sexy mobile phone! M: We- W: Stop bickering! *the slap of skin hitting skin* M: *rustling fabric* OW! This is abuse! W: Leave me at the altar then, you baby. M: Your baby. D: *over the sound of far-away laughter* You guys are a fucking nightmare. E: I should have stayed home. M: Yeah, you should have! *sound of metal rattling* *sound of books thudding to the ground* M: EL! You can't just come into our house and -

E: Be nice to me, then! D: El, when are you getting here? E: I’m flying out tomorrow afternoon - dad’s dropping me off at the airport at 2 and I have a layover in New York. I should land around 10 am local time. *rustling of fabric* *the creaking of the springs of the couch cushions* W: *getting farther away* Stop planning your trips in front of us! M: Yeah, some of us don’t have our flights paid for by the government. And SOME of us care about our friends! *sound of books getting picked up* W: *distantly* And family! M: Yes, thank you, babe. W: *voice getting louder, closer* It’s called homecoming for a reason, Dustin! D: How many times am I going to have to apologize? M: Until you’re actually here for homecoming next year! *sound of springs squeaking as someone flops back onto the couch* D: I’ll be there at thanksgiving! You could see me next week if you wanted to! M: Yeah, but you broke the tradition! Which means the streak is broken and there'll be less pressure to come next year so someone else won’t be able to make it and it’s all ruined and it’s your fault! D: Relax; no one’s going to miss it next year. I wouldn’t have either if I’d known you were going to be such a stickler about it. W: How didn’t you know? Mike’s always this whiny about this kind of thing. *fabric rustling* D: Hey, Will, you know, I could still introduce you to my colleague Steward? Offer's always open- W: Oh no, I agree with Mike, Dusty. His bitching makes sure I don’t have to whine about it - that’s exactly why I said yes to his proposal. M: *scoff* Yeah, that’s why and not the mind-blowing- W: Mike, think very carefully about what you say next and remember that until this is legally binding I can still take Catherine and leave! M: As if Catherine would choose you! *fabric rustling* W: Fuck off. *sound of air kisses* E: Dustin, I might just call Bernard and tell him to get me an earlier flight. M: You don’t have to be here, El, you’re the one that broke in at too-fucking-early o’clock- E: Mom and dad sleep in on Saturdays! I was bored! M: And we don’t? Some of us have to wake up at six every morning to get to work! E: Oh pish posh. W: *tiredly* Mike, don’t antagonize my sister. M: Will, don’t defend my ex-girlfriend. *springs squeaking* M: Will- No wait come back- *feet hitting the ground* *running footsteps* *shuffling and clothing rustling* *giggling* E: *loud sigh* I wish Max were here already. D: *crackling connection* Where are they? *cut-off yelp in the distance* *sound of head thudding against the wall* *giggling* E: They’re still asleep upstairs.

D: Did Lucas- *sound of someone grunting as they're pushed backwards* *sound of someone jumping over a couch* *sound of springs bouncing as El yelps* M: Wait a second - *sound of handset getting picked up* *clicking of a button* Will, can you and El start on breakfast please? *muffled protest in the distance* *confused shuffling* M: Thanks, babe. E: Why can’t I just stay- W: *distantly* El, just come in here! E: *muttered* whatever, stupid men...*couch cushions shifting* D: Is she gone? M: Yeah and I’ve taken you off speaker. D: SO? M: *fabric rustling* *couch cushions shifting* Okay, Lucas got the r-i-n-g, but he’s not sure when or how yet. He’s thinking of doing it at Thanksgiving with his family, but he’s worried Max might want something more private. D: She’s going to say ‘yes’ anyway. Tell him to do it with his family around. And to stop being a coward. M: I’ll let you tell him - they’re just coming down the stairs. M: *shuffling of a phone pulled away from a face* Lucas, Dustin wants to tell you he loves you! *distant voices* *sound of phone getting handed over* L: Hey, man D: Ask her around your family and stop being a coward. Hell, why not just do it tonight? *rustling of wind* L: Love you too, Dusty-Bun. *distant voices* D: You guys really need to let that go. Even Suzy has stopped calling me that - most of the times. L: Ew, I don’t need to know that. D: You’re the one with your mind in the gutter, dude! L: Anyway, we are going to help chaperone the homecoming dance tonight. D: Seriously, all of you? That’s so lame. We used to curse the chaperones. L: Yeah, honestly we’re not happy about it either, but Mike and Will don't have a choice so they signed us up against our will as well. We’re only here for the weekend anyway - and as we’re good friends that actually want to spend time together… D: I know you all miss my beautiful face but you guys really should stop whining about it. It's unbecoming. L: *scoff* D: You can still ask Max - it would be cute! Remember the snow ball? L: Absolutely not. I’ll probably spend the entire night holding Max back from spiking the punch, anyway. Mx: *yelling from far away* If I’m going to have to spend my evening around high-schoolers AGAIN, I might as well have a little fun. And seriously these losers need it - it’s like they all have sticks up their butts all of a sudden. L: *grinning* Remember Junior prom? *loud rattling in the distance* W: *far away* EL! PUT THE PAN DOWN! E: *distantly* DON’T MENTION THAT! L: *sound of phone being lowered* *voice more distant* Oh come on, El! It was funny! W: *distantly* PUT IT DOWN! WE GOT THAT FROM MOM! L: *grazing of phone against ear* Anyway, how’s Spain? D: Great - I had a symposium this morning but I’m free-roaming this afternoon. L: That’s great dude - Oh, breakfast is almost ready. Max, you want to speak with Dustin? Mx: *closer than before* No, you know I hate that guy. *sound of fabric rustling* *giggling* *sound of a hand being slapped away* D: Love you too, Max! Mx: Stay safe, Dusty-Bun! Don’t forget my fucking magnet! D: I won’t! Where did Mike go? L: He’s playing referee in the kitchen. I’ll tell him goodbye for you. D: Thanks! Talk to you guys later! *distant chorus from the kitchen* Bye!

[Call disconnects, Saturday September 28th 1996, 10:47 am]

[sarahlynn136]

alright alright here's the cillian lore because you asked. this shit is crazy.

i met this guy back in 2022 and we weren't super close at first. then found out that we were gonna be in disney world at the same time. so we met up a few times over that trip and it was pretty great. he breaks up with his gf and tries to make me his rebound (i was identifying as a lesbian at this time i had little to no attraction to men so he was getting his hopes up for nothing) he was also close with my cousin and asked her to have sex with him, which her very Christian ass said "bitch fuck no"

he confesses his feelings for me and im like "sorry dude nuh uh". so we're planning our second time seeing each other and while we're there we hold hands and his (his hands were so damn sweaty) and yeah apparently his feelings never went away, and platonic hand holding doesn't exist to him

so in april of 2023 he gets with this aroace person, they break it off bcs well. they're aroace. and im attempting to comfort him and then he ghosts me for 3 days and i assume he's just dead. (this is where my dislike of ghosting first begins so yeah fuck you new person ghosting me WHO KNEW ALL ABOUT THIS. smh and people still try and defend them). anyways uh during this time i grow *feelings* because im left alone thinking he's dead. he comes back, does this whole apology thing, and then i start flirting with him because what else is my 14 year old ass supposed to do?

important uh. he's 3 years older than me. he just turned 19. this is uh. important

ok so during this time he meets my one irl friend and they get close. and he basically forces us into a love triangle. im having on and off feelings for him and become VERY codependent on him. so we meet up again and we kiss. it sucked. would not recommend. AND HE LIKE??? HADN'T SHAVED??? so yeah not a fan. anyways he then goes on to say my one friend is cute and it just puts a bad taste in my mouth.

now here's the wild shit.

after he leaves he sends me this what i like to call contract. in this contract it states that if we were to be together, i wouldn't be allowed to be with anyone else, no one could know until i was 19, and i would have to H A V E H I S C H I L D R E N.

IM BEING SO SERIOUS RIGHT NOW.

so i back off and we stay friends for a bit on and off flirting. he's uncomfortable with it though because he's "not gay" and im trans. so he just throws this whole fit about it and it's like. in some weird way kinda transphobic??? like it's weird.

so when he turns 18 he basically ghosts me, and im still very codependent on him and then i start to lose my mind. he's supposed to come and see me, but then cancels a week before. i break things off with him because i just can't do it anymore.

now we're nearly at the present day. in september i find out that he couldn't visit me BECAUSE HE WAS HOMELESS AND HIS PARENTS MOVED TO HAWAII AND HIS DAD GOT ARRESTED. WE THEN START TALKING AGAIN AND HE APOLOGIES FOR EVERYTHING AND IM JUST LOSING MY MIND.

and now. as of today. i find out that he is moving to germany in 8 months and im just like GIRL WHATTTT

and that's the very abridged cillian lore because there's so much more

bro this is so rigged.. dad lore goes crazy for my moots out there.. I dunno what to say, sorry, I'm terrible at this shit. Hope you get better? God, I sound like a fucking jerk but.. GOD DAMMIT I just hope ur better and uhhh stay manly dude!!!

[nextstopwonderland]

Wait you think they could potentially make up? How would that work?

Only if this turns out to be a “we did this for your own good because you wouldn’t retire otherwise and you were about to kill yourself trying to keep defending this title and you said you’re gonna keep going until you can’t defend it anymore so we’re gonna just ensure you can’t” explanation

There is literally an interview with mox shortly after Bryan announced his wind down in which he says he can’t imagine Bryan ever fully stopping unless he were to get seriously injured and he’d then be forced to and I took that entire interview to be a shoot but who knows now, maybe that part of it wasn’t - Bryan himself then says something similar before the Will match in an interview which was clearly deliberate : “unless something happens medically I will never retire”

It’s only after that statement and the will match that Bryan even starts to use the word retire and even then it isn’t really until swerve storyline ramps and he starts switching his tune to saying maybe he’s just ready to be done. And then he needs people like jarrett and Yuta and Eddie to light a fire under him

Mox and claudio? absent from that support. Why? Well, could be the superficial reason that I hope we don’t get which is they’re jealous and never wanted Bryan to go for this and don’t think he deserves it or something but how the fuck does that stand with iron sharpens iron?

OR it could be they hate that Bryan is pushing himself to these limits when he’s saying how injured he is (which I still firmly believe is mostly kayfabe and there’s no way he needs surgery)

So you go back to mox saying back in September that he can’t see Bryan ever stopping unless he’s seriously hurt (while also calling him the greatest to ever do it and just gushing as mox loves to gush about Bryan), you’ve got Claudio around that same time saying he wants Bryan to go out on his terms and he deserves it and then months later saying he wants him to retire healthy, and you’ve got them nowhere to be seen as he trains for the title shot yet Yuta is practicing with him nonstop

so they take him out to save him from himself (as Nigel mcguinness has been shouting on commentary this entire damn year)

And what will Bryan say when all of that is finally revealed? Well I think he’d be able to eventually accept that they were doing it out of love in their own twisted violent way the way the bcc does everything

And that’s the only way I can really see a kayfabe makeup

(But honestly? I really don’t know if this is where they are going and if they honestly just make this about mox wanting to be top dog in the company why the fuck couldn’t they just fight bcc style the way they have in the past? I will be furious if this is given some flimsy reasoning that wouldn’t past muster in reality)

[wrestlingisfake]

Worlds End preview

MJF vs. Samoa Joe - Friedman is making his 11th defense of the AEW men's world championship. He already defended the title against Joe on September 20, but he needed a timely distraction by Adam Cole to do it. Adam got hurt doing that, so Max can't rely on that trick this time. During Cole's absence, MJF has been struggling to keep up with all the guys gunning for him, so Joe offered to provide assistance in exchange for this title match. MJF finally took him up on that offer on November 18, so now it's time to pay up.

For the past three months MJF's storylines have been in the shadow of The Devil, a mysterious masked figure that stole Max's devil mask and seems to want to ruin Friedman's life. For a while it looked like Joe and MJF had a common interest in thwarting The Devil and his goons, since Joe wanted the champ to be safe and sound leading up to this match. But then on December 27, Joe and The Devil revealed it was all a set-up--Joe let two of The Devil's goons beat Max for the ROH tag title, then he personally laid out the world champ with a chair.

MJF is hurting. Not just because Joe betrayed and attacked him, and not just because he couldn't keep his promise to Adam Cole about keeping the tag belts. He's said that he's working through a legit torn labrum in his left shoulder. He clearly fucked up his right hip when he did an elbow drop from the top rope to the floor in his last world title defense. On Thursday The Players' Tribune ran a long column by Max, where he acknowledged that he's banged up and probably shouldn't be doing this match. Everything about the column reads like he wants to get some stuff of his chest because he knows he's about to go away for a while. Of course, if anybody would know how to give that impression as a red herring, to build suspense for a wrestling storyline, it's MJF.

I don't expect to learn anything significant about The Devil on this show. But that's fine with me, because I've been hankering to see this match since before The Devil even showed up. For me the point is to see the people's scumbag square off with a powerhouse he can't outwit. Max has been an underdog in most of his big title bouts, but this time he's really behind the 8-ball, and I want to see how he faces that.

When these two first worked together in September, I never expected Joe to win the title. But since the first match, AEW has only pushed Joe harder, and built him up even bigger as an unstoppable final boss. He could play that role in the midcard, and he did for over a year as ROH television champ. But once he vacated that title, I became certain they don't want him to lose again anytime soon. My gut says this is the end of Max's title reign. He could certainly surprise me and retain, but I sure don't know how.

Eddie Kingston vs. Jon Moxley - This is the final match of the Continental Classic tournament. By design, this match will decide the first AEW continental champion, but two other titles are at stake as well, since Eddie added his ROH men's world title and the STRONG men's title to the pot. So whoever wins will get three belts forming "the modern American triple crown."

Moxley won the Gold League with a 5-1 record, including a three-way semifinal against Swerve Strickland and Jay White. Kingston lost his first two Blue League matches, but since then he's been on a four-match winning streak. The last time these two faced off one-on-one was 2020, when Moxley beat Eddie in two world title bouts. Kingston has to be considered the underdog, but that's how he likes it.

Ever since Eddie put the ROH and STRONG belts on the line in this tournament, I've expected him to at least get to the final, and probably to win the whole thing. If you were just going to make up a new belt and put it on Moxley, there'd be no reason to bring the other two into this. So my gut says the plan is to build up Eddie as some kind of traveling champion who brings his triple crown to other promotions. But we won't really know what the continental title is for until after this match, I suppose.

Christian Cage vs. Adam Copeland - Cage's AEW TNT title is on the line. This is a rematch from December 6, where Cage beat Copeland to retain the belt, but he needed interference from Shayna Wayne to do it. This time Copeland wants no excuses, so the stipulation is that the match can't end by disqualification. Whoever ends up with the title after this will likely defend it against the winner of tonight's battle royale, at some point.

Cage's whole patriarch gimmick has really gotten over. I never expected him to retain against Darby Allin in October, or to win the first match against Copeland. But at this point, I think the fandom is more invested in loathing Christian than they are in seeing Copeland jump over from WWE. The money isn't in giving Copeland a belt, it's in seeing what new low Christian will stoop to in order to maintain his power base. I actually think it might be a good idea for Copeland to lose again, which would have been unthinkable eight weeks ago. I'm going to say this could go either way.

Toni Storm vs. Riho - Storm is defending the AEW women's world title. The whole storyline is just that Riho returned on December 6, so now she gets a title shot. To be fair, Riho later scored key wins over Ruby Soho and Saraya, but that's still a bit backwards. Riho is popular, but Toni's gimmick has momentum, so I don't see a title change happening anytime soon.

Julia Hart vs. Abadon - Hart's AEW TBS championship is up for grabs. If they win here, Abadon would be the first non-binary champion in AEW. Not much story here except that Julia did the lights-out teleport gimmick and offered the belt to Abadon, and they were like "yeah, let's do it" but more like a zombie would say it. There's clearly some intrigue between Julia and Skye Blue, but I'm not sure it'll play into this match.

This is a big one for me, because I invested early in both of these wrestlers. Abadon's gimmick is the kind of thing you used to only see men do, and I like that they have the range to be hideous and disturbing and not simply "sexy zombie." I wasn't sure Julia had the chops to fit in with the House of Black, but she's risen to the challenge and made people take her seriously as more than just "cute kid." They've both come so far in the past couple of years, and it's just rewarding to see them both on this big stage.

I will just bet that all the wrestlers have a good time. But realistically Julia should win, and it's a step forward for Abadon to even be in a PPV title bout.

Ricky Starks & Big Bill & Konosuke Takeshita & Powerhouse Hobbs vs. Chris Jericho & Sammy Guevara & Sting & Darby Allin - This was originally Starks and Bill defending the AEW tag title against Jericho and Kenny Omega, but Omega was recently hospitalized with diverticulitis. Now nobody gets a title shot, I guess.

Guevara turned on Jericho back in September to join the Don Callis Family, but he suffered a concussion shortly thereafter. He finally returned on December 27 and turned against the group. Jericho made the save, mending fences with Sammy, but Bill and Starks attacked them. Then Sting and Allin showed up for some reason. So AEW announced an eight-man tag. Originally Hobbs and Kyle Fletcher were representing the Don Callis Family on the heel side, but then Fletcher was swapped out with Takeshita for some reason.

I think it's pretty clear AEW had to scramble to re-book this match after Omega was sidelined. I guess the goal is to pivot to Sting & Allin vs. Starks & Bill, because otherwise I have no idea why this needed to become an eight-man tag. Sting remains undefeated in AEW, and I don't think this is going to be his first loss.

Byran Danielson & Claudio Castagnoli & Mark Briscoe & Daniel Garcia vs. Jay White & Brody King & Rush & Jay Lethal - These are eight of the twelve men from the Continental Classic tournament. There's not much to this except that none of these guys have any storylines set up for this week, so we're just throwing them into one match. The outcome probably doesn't make much difference, although I'm thinking Danielson's team will pick up the win.

Swerve Strickland vs. Keith Lee - These two were a top tag team last year, but things fell apart. The split dragged out for weeks until December 21, 2022, when Strickland did a double foot stomp off the top rope onto a cinder block on Lee's chest. Then not much happened. Finally, a couple of weeks ago, Lee started bringing up the cinder block and wanted a blowoff match, but by that point I had completely forgotten what he was talking about. I mean, okay I guess. Thing is, if they'd done the match last year, Lee would be the heavy favorite, but as it stands right now I think Swerve has to win.

Andrade El Idolo vs. Miro - Miro's hot and flexible wife CJ Perry came to AEW in September looking for clients to manage, but every time someone signs up Miro beats the fuck out of them. Andrade, however, is not so easy to beat the fuck out of. CJ convinced Miro to spare Andrade during the Continental Classic tournament, but that's over now, so. I feel like Andrade should win to keep the story going. On the other hand, I'd rather just see Miro crush Andrade and get back together with CJ. So we'll have to wait and see.

HOOK vs. Wheeler Yuta - This is scheduled for the pre-show. Hook's FTW is at stake; Yuta's ROH pure title is not. It's an "FTW rules" match, which just means the match can't end by count-out or disqualification, so anything goes. I figure one way or another we're going to get a rematch for Yuta's belt under "pure rules." So Hook should probably just win.

20-man battle royale - Another pre-show match. This is evidently a standard battle royale, so it starts with all the participants in the ring, and ends when all but one has been eliminated. Eliminations occur when a participant exits the ring over the top rope to the floor. The last man left in the ring is declared the winner, and will receive a shot at the AEW TNT title at a later date. None of the participants have been announced so far.

Assuming Christian Cage retains the TNT title, I suppose the most interesting challenger to set up would be his estranged henchman Killswitch (formerly Luchasaurus), but it may be too soon for that. If Adam Copeland wins the title, you need someone who can be a credible threat to him, like maybe Wardlow or PAC. Although I guess it'd be kind of funny if Roderick Strong won and found a new Adam to yell at. I dunno, I guess I'll go with Trent Beretta to win, since he'd be decent in a losing effort to either Cage or Copeland.

[cheemken]

Hey Knight, with Halloween coming up soon I got a question about the champions

What do they do on Halloween?

Do they watch Horror movies? Walk around the Neighbourhoods looking at decorations? Start putting up the Christmas lights already? Go to Haunted houses? Or do any of them go Trick or Treating?

Actually about that last one, what would the Champions dress as?

This could be directed towards either Gen of Champions, you decide which group to answer with :)

Ohhh that's fun! But do spare me bc I have no experience w Halloween as in my country we only have the Four Months of Christmas™ hahaha so like yeah I'm gonna base all this on the shows I watch lmao

Anyways going w the first gen champs

My guy, Geeta is absolutely fucking vibing, the biggest horror fan and the one who goes all out during Halloween, Diantha's vibing too in a different way, like fr, once October hits, Geeta's there waking Diantha up all "mi ángel, it's Halloween soon, we need to set up the traps"

"yes I know, dar— what do you mean traps—"

"for the horror house. I'm sure people would love it this year."

"darling, please, you went overboard last time, you traumatized someone."

"Last time wasn't even that terrifying."

"Geeta, no—"

It's Leon she scared lmfao

Cynthia and Lance would go around the neighbourhood tho judging their decorations. Going on how that guy didn't even bother, that lady is trying too hard, they're sure as hell some of their decorations are just their ghost pokemon. These two then tell Geeta all the decorations the other peeps in the neighbourhood has and she plans to outdo them, this is honestly the only time of the year these three get along well lmfao like they're that competitive they want their house and their decorations to be the very best like no one ever was hahaha

Wallace and Diantha do go all out on costumes fr, Lance and Steven has to deal w them, they have to be matching, for the aesthetic. Diantha and Wallace also really competitive, wanting to outdo others' costumes. Dia and Lance do supervise Iris and Hau when they go trick or treating back then when they were younger, it's always nice to see the kids having fun and making new friends, tho Dia did have to limit their sweets during those nights bc the first time they celebrated Halloween together, Hau and Iris and even Cynthia did not sleep the entire night bc of the sugar rush, Dia now knows better lmao. Also doesn't let Cynthia watch over the kids when out trick or treating, Cyn taught them how to actually trick people to get more candy.

Leon would celebrate the Four Months of Christmas™ fr, even gets the kids to join him. Look, he's not like Diantha who indulges Geeta in her grotesque horror filled interests, he just wants presents and snow and having the fam together and presents okay, homeboy would put up the Christmas lights as soon as September hits lmfao like their house would be halved w Geeta's Halloween decorations and Leon's Christmas decorations. Geeta, out of spite, placed spiders and witches hats on Leon's Christmas decorations; Leon, in revenge, also put Christmas hats and reindeer headbands on Geeta's Halloween decorations. It's always a war zone in there home once September or October hits hahaha

Idk what they'd wear tho fr, I just know Wallace and Diantha would have the most aesthetic costumes out of all of them lmfao, Geeta would have like,, idk, she gives off the vibes she'd have a costume of Leatherface from Texas Chainsaw Massacre, her mask is so detailed that it scared everyone. Y'know Leon's Christmas get up in PokeMas? Yeah, I know he'd wear that during Halloween just to spite Geeta lmfaooo homeboy would defend himself saying it's still a costume hahaha

[smashalltheguitars]

this is not a call out. this is not a call to action. rbs are fine if you want for whatever reason but please do not tag people or signal boost, this is so i can get everything in the open and people can make their own decisions about hen and about me.

in september, i helped write volcano shake em up. i joined a server for my chemical romance - the gerard way pussy indulgence - and i made fast friends with people i still care about so much it hurts. one of them was Hen.

Hen moderated the gwpi. i liked her. she's smart, funny, confident. i wanted to be her friend. in the early days of the gwpi, i had a brief disagreement with another server member. i literally cannot remember what we disagreed about. it was small and resolved itself quickly, but not before hen messaged me to tell me her thoughts on the situation: that i was in the right, and she liked that i stood up for myself.

this is when i fucked up, and i kept fucking up for a while. i made a group chat. hen, myself, and several others i roped in without really discussing anything. i wanted their approval. i wanted to be in the right. i felt like i was getting a good grade in discord. i had friends for the first time in years.

none of that justifies it. i was cruel, about people i disagreed with, about strangers, about people i called friends to their face. and when the people in the server weren't annoying me, hen and i went looking for other targets. we were never outright insulting to their face, or at least i kept telling myself we weren't - just little things, jumping into arguments to defend each other, venting privately to let off steam, and of course saying unbelievably vile things about people who did not deserve it.

as time went on, the group chat started to get used less and less often. hen and i tended to be the ringleaders, and as winter set in and i started struggling more with seasonal depression i was just online less often and muted a lot of servers and chats. slowly it started getting more and more frequent that close friends would message me along the lines of "am i overreacting for being upset, or was hen really rude in the server." it was always small things, a meme she didn't like had to be spoilered, someone's special interest was insulted, she was snappy and dismissive about a conversation she joined in the middle of. it was always small things, like she was just having a bad day or upset at something unrelated, and i hoped she was doing okay.

what was, for me, the first thing that was big enough for me to talk to her about how she was acting, happened when we were goofing off in gwpi. hen came online in the middle of it, immediately told us to stop, threatened to delete the server, and left quickly - leaving a brief wake of other people, people who were usually inactive in gwpi, who agreed with her and told us off.

it felt VERY familiar, and it made all the small things feel just as familiar. i just hadn't been on that side of it before. i thought to check a different server, one i'd had muted, and sure enough, we were now the ones being vented about. once i spoke up in that thread, i got heartfelt apologies from most people in that server. one person in particular took steps to reach out, work with the server mod, add new rules, and lock the thread since it was breeding such negativity. i am not a forgiving person and apologies mean almost nothing to me; their actions made me think that could change.

hen apologized for forgetting i was in the server she was venting to. she said nothing about what was said to my face or behind my back.

to be blunt, i let that resolve too quickly. i did self-reflect long enough to admit i was being a hypocrite for asking for kindness and to leave the old group chat, but i had trusted hen and considered her one of my favorite people, despite everything. i was still deep in a mental health episode, had just lost someone i considered a close friend, and didn't feel like i could handle losing another. again that does not justify it. i refused to do what i had just demanded of others. i stood by and did what was easiest instead of what was right, and i said it would all be okay and did nothing about the rest of the server members she had been hurting.

i thought everything had been resolved, even if i was not happy with the resolution, until back in that same server she had been venting to. in the middle of a conversation, hen made a joke about changing the name of gwpi 'to see how long it would take them to notice,' with the followup of, verbatim, "Why get a discord full of people if not to perform experiments on them." up to this point, however she acted behind our backs, she had still claimed the gwpi members as her friends; additionally, being watched, experimented on, or gaslit like that can very easily be a psychosis or paranoia trigger. hen knew that that is something i (and a few others in the server) struggle with, as i had previously trusted her to the point of letting her know i was having a psychotic episode and asking her to sit on voice call with me until i could ground myself. that is a HUGE act of trust.

the response i got when i expressed why i was not okay with this, after several instances of 'it was a joke,' was "I’m sorry that you took it that way but I would personally not be offended if someone said that about a group I was a part of." again, verbatim. that conversation ended unresolved and a few days later, she left every server we share with very little warning. i wished her as well as i could bring myself to and tried to move on with my life and hopefully do better going forward. that was the last i had heard from or about her until this afternoon when paramoreworld's post came to light and showed that apparently the pattern is continuing.

i don't have a real reason for posting this except that i am tired of dealing with it in fragments. this is only what i was personally involved in, it says nothing about what other people have dealt with from either or both of us, but at least now it's in one place.

[fansideblogtocjcherryth]

Notes Of Book 5 Defender

from September the 30 of this year. Yay I forgot I could use open library 

Chaper 1

Okay damn it, they call him blond, still think of him as brown haired though.

The area seems to be a meeting place of tabinis dead dad.

We meet caljeiri , tabinis son being a bit slow at ateving

Valasi is gonna be rolling a bit in the grave sooner or latter.

Emeritus might be the astronomer who kind of saved the world from Deana Hanks bullshit, thank you.

Oh so now the conservatives want the space shit so badly huh?

Jago and banichi being wonderful as always.

Oh would you look at that they missed a flight.

He is now worried about some strange behavior and potential political bullshit 

So children are not raised by the parents but are Kind of raised by the village, so to speak 

Bren is concerned for the kid because it hits a bit close to home for him. 

he admits that an aveti could hurt him on accident

Everyone is a bit worried due to the new changes.

It's so funny how some poeple are just fighting over who gets to raise tabini's kid.

It "bren scared his computer may have been tampered with time"

They made it to the space shuttle

Chapter 2

Jago helps him with his coat 

Ginny Kroger is back. And holy shit this book has 18 chapters? 

It's funny how ginny says that the islands been wet. also the open library has an book mark thingy that works even after you get logged out?

nearly half a year before he and Ginny spoke

the attendant is apologetic about not being able to provide drinks but bren is okay with that.

ginny saying baji-naji kind of implies that there is humans kind of believe in the chance  

there starship is moving along smoothly in being built

bren thinks that tabini may have gotten his son to maybe meet bren.

i have a feeling this books biggest themes are about relationships with the younger generations can maybe make things better.

its been six years since brens been on the island

its kind of good that things have been a bit better.

they made it to the location

Chapter 3

 its kind of surreal now that i keep seeing vodka this much in a book. 

wow bren really dose not like dealing with the island at all.

Jackson areospace is the island's space port that is also helping get businesses like sundrink and peterson's to the workers of the ships

yeah fuck you heritage party, fuck you.

tom lund have been stuck in office for two months 

there is so many discussions of corporation power struggles that hits a bit to close to home for me.

Brens gonna try to call tom to keep him from being a political rival to him. 

sandra Johnsons actually been okay and gave bren some plant cuttings

his femily is messed up as usual.

he kind of sucked at solitaire on his computer while pretending to work.

4

the stewards gave bren his bullet proof vest and formal coat .

it sounds like the everyone kind of won, bit by bit, the humans got the library of human achievement and the atevi manage to have a pretty great economy  but the ship folk are being a bit grumpy.

it seems like ramirez and shawn and tabini have been able to work together to keep things together.

he realized he forgot his gloves in the hold of the ship, luckily jago is kind enough to be a shield him from the cold. 

kate shugart is waiting to welcome ginny while bren is with banichi, jago, tano and algini.

bindanda is here and cooking as ever. and jase is gonna be with them for dinner.

well brens still paranoid about dying.

wow geigi's place looks sick.

its kind of funny that there is video games and spices in his luggage.

they are just so proud of the robots aren't they?

yo bren, be cool with cajeiri, hes just a kid.

well sandra got married and had kids. neet. oh dammit barb again, its been two years already.

okay false alarm, it because his mother is in pretty bad health.

knowing narani is like maybe a 3 times grandfather is rather funny

well bren did manage to get his staff some stuff, like a Bowl for narani , a old book for bindanda , some letters from families of the smaller staff, books for both tano and and algini with a litter for tano from his father

banichi and jago gave out some things as well perticullerly a florid shirt, to everyone elses laughter to the serious algini, he at first accepted the shirt smoothly then took it off when Jase was coming in.

5

Jase is wearing his casual's for his meeting with bren instead of atevi formals.

okay so the Astronomer that saved there ass in the second book from deanas bullshit name is emeritus / Grigiji .  

Grigiji and geigi seem to be one of the atevi that are in the ships an apreciated as well

some how bindanda managed to get some fruit up to the ships.

bren explains to jase that there may be something suspicious with the ceremony that tabini gave and might have been a political move.

jase really adores the oceans and have been trying to get a chance when they can.

so it seems like yolanda and jase have been on and off kind of romantic relationship.

seems like yolanda is acting suspicious and remirez is kind of hesitent to get jase to leave his spot on the captian 

bren is gonna talk to geigi tomorrow after breakfast

jase tells bren to go to bed cause he looks tired and bren to himself admits that he missed jase.

he sends a message to toby to try to contact him

even jago admits he needs to sleep and joined him soon after. 

6

toby dose not call him back so bren is hoping that the help crisis he was told of was solved.

geigi it seems to be there neighbor on the ship and bren likes walking around for the excrsice 

it seems like there was a little bit of conflict with the atevi and the humans , some times kinds of stupid.

so geigi is in the the construction office. thats a little neet.

geigi is just so kind with offering tea to bren and talking about what has happened with Ginny and Jase.

oh my god geigi is trying to recreate a place for fishing , fish hatcheries and even for fish to escape the net.

so it seemed like the ship folk actually agree more with the atevi on fish and fruit stuff then meet.

kaplan is back an a little tired, also ramirez been taken to the hospital , oh crap

7

well it looks like a gaurd of ramirez named  Mr Jenrette is risking the wraith of bren by denying  bren and geigi to check on ramirez.

Geigi is just so polite and understanding about the situation. banichi and the security of geigi are tense as hell

oh shit ramirez is fucking dead , we hardly knew thee and the on coming shit show.

well the good news for jase at least is that Ogun is gonna take charge. also I think Ogun is african coded maybe due to the skin description and the name coming from an Orisha of african religious origins https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ogun

bren has to explain in ragi about whats gonna happen as ogun and jase go with the phoenix to explain the passing.

bren sends a message to those affected by Rasmirez death to visit him if they need to talk.

as he is taking with his staff , it sounds like something is going on down there and no messages are able to get out, great.

oh crap shit might be going down soon with some this gonna be bad. he tells ginny to maybe not talk to her on the phone and maybe talk to his staff instead in case she hears something.

oh shit they might be a riot soon due to the rumors that the ship that got so badly wreaked might not have been so wreaked.

well he tries to get paulson to get more info on the rumor and holy hell ramirez asked to die when he confessed that the ship they thought was gone was still alive.

well shit jase is already on a meeting and bren warns him the rumor is out.

bren even tells jase that maybe telling the truth will not get poeple pissed at them for the deception.

banichi heard everything and talks with him on his feelings about being lied to a bunch of times.

bren hopes jase comes back with answers

8

the announcement of the death of rasmirez is announced.

bren hopes there gonna be honest but luckily they are are honest. note to self need to translate "God, Jase, actomen'shi not eshtomeni!" bren was talking about

he mandges to get a message to Mogari-nai about the shit show. also worrying about tabini cuse he is not responding.

welp the political shit is causing bren to panic about potential traiters again, great.

the atevi and him descide to tend to the funeral, with bullet proof vests

bren sounds pissed with how ogun speech to stani ramirez and noticing he has not seen yolanda in the crowd

well shit some one is pretty pissed about how the missing ship reounion is still out there and ogun is refusing to answer questions.

kaplan , you and polano and pressmen are true bros to the crew.

so it seemed like ramirez keep quiet because some one on the missing ship told him to. that is some loyalty right there.

he , paulson, ginny and geigi all agree to meet in the offices of geigi to discuss the shit show. 

bren is just so godamn cool when he needs jase to get confidence about being a leader figure.

oh jennertte in in the meeting with them.

jase is having to smake a meeting about the whole shit show while bren translate into mosphei

trying to figure out why ramirez would not say anything about the shit show is harder then it looks.

since what they know , even tamun didn't know about the secret, would have fucked everyone over if he did.

the offical situation was they saw something while they were surveying a system, whent back and thought the reunion was fucked up then fled back to where we are.

oh shit ramirez wanted the ship built to maybe go back so he got the president of the island and tabini involved to maybe try to go back there to rescue them. that is an ugly feeling for poeple like ginny.

two choices. never go back to that ship or try to launch a rescue.

holy hell ramirez might be a fucking clever dick, he may have lied to everyone but he did tell the truth to the leaders and considering the concept of man'chi for tabini means that the atevi tied to tabini might be more likely to help.

bren this chapter really knows how to make an empowering speech on a fly in this chapter, holy heck is he good.

9

Bren is now asking for any new messages that may have come. narani says no.

he gets jago, banichi , tano and algini to go to a room with him to explain that the meeting was a success to keep 

some of them are wondering if the captian is gonna try to screw over jase. bren Dosen't think so. it seems like humans are less likly to get jeylious of others taking alies from you.

bren is more worried about the humans rage at being lied to by ramirez because this is a lot bigger then something small.

bren sends a message to tabini that also expresses how worried his messages are even getting to him. he even gets the cousin of narani , I think goes by Nadi , to get the message to tabini as quickly as possible

bren asks Dala if there have been any rumors , it sounds like the man'chi is rather confused by the changes going on . also it sounds like the massage has not been given due to the major Domo eidi who says that some one is there to answer.

bren is having a crisis of faith and scared of being disfavored.

great bren is now convinced that ramirez may have been assassinated.

toby Finnaly called back and it sounds like brens mom is not doing great and oh boy what a nasty argument they are now in.

bren admits he is putting his foot down on being used as a way for his mom as a tool for her and his birth family's emotions .

he makes a letter to barb to be for his mother who he is convined that she is acting this way to get his attention.

during breakfast bren gets a message from jase about voting to try to find the ship that made all this shit go down and to do that they are gonna need to leave the planet.

after the call he asks for his indoor coat that makes him feel so much better. 

it seems like a ship is being sent to them unannounced. suspicious , bren suggests they meet the shuttle 

bren warns Jase about the shuttle

10

they set up the place to welcome who ever might be in the ship.

bren , jase and geigi await the shuttle on the lift and ogun assumes it ilisidi .

Ilisidi is now here and brought cajeiri along with here. Bren first reaction to the kid being here is kind of funny "A child. A boy. A protocol disaster "

For a good minute that have to save the boy from zero gravity.  Jase thankfully succeeded in getting him down when ilisidis cane fails.

Ilisidi is able to help get the kid into cenedis hand to get him down.

Iliside was able to hatch 14 wi'itikiin chick's from where she lived.

Bren feels bad for the boy and is able to introduce him to jase and geigi

Ilisidi is having a bit of a "kids these days"

Yolanda appears with ogun us here and telling ilisidi about the quarters being ready.

Bren is being worried about babysitting a six year old and entertaining a scary old lady.

Ilisidi just says to bren that they are going with jase to the missing station when ever he like it or not.

Well it turns out they knew his message would arrived about the death . So it kind of made the theory of the assassination void.

New theory , yolanda might be planning something. 

He gets his staff to start packing up for the trip to the location.

11

Bren is worried about how jago and banichi are staring at him.

The robots where wanted for the mission so that they would get fuel instead of humans

They are hopeing that they do not encounter the hostile forces at all during the trip.

Sabin wants more ships before the shit while ogun wants to get to the shit.

Sounds like sabin kind of dislikes atevi

Bren working with sabin is gonna be a pain, ain't it?

Bren was able to charm both captions to tell everyone of the truth about what they are doing.

Sounds like three days is gonna get nasty.

12

Jago and bren and banichi is gonna have a bad time telling the news about the three days to ilisidi 

Holy hell ilisidi , cenedi and maybe ambitious atevi like tabini teaching method for caljeiri is "sink or swim little fucker" 

He gives orders that narani to stay at there home base to try to protect what they got. As well as tano and algini

Bren feels cast aside by the whole shit show.

Damn the staff are a bit pissed about bren trying to get them to leave and away from danger 

well shit it seems like yolanda may have been the un liked child compared to jase by ramirez favoritism . kind of like what bren when through with his family.

he sends a letter to jase that in case he ever felt like it he could talk to him.

jago and banichi left suddenly 

he gets surprised at his resentful jealousy when he realizes that yolanda is staying instead of him.

13

he visits with yolanda and feels a little better around her when she tried apologizing for her rudeness

he invites banichi to kind of make him feel better of having 3 people at dinner instead of two.

after dinner he gets her to talk about the shit show after in his office.

 yolanda gets suspicious when she gets suspicious

she admits she is scared of the aiji and bren gives her some advice on dealing with him. having to be cautious and both stand up to him. turnabout 

wow this chapter is kind of like a therapy session for him and yolanda . she is kind of messed up like him. 

yolanda tells him to take care of jase due to him being affected by ramirez kind of rejecting him for yolanda due to him being tied to the atevi.

also jase hates sabin

jagos worried about ilisidi and geigi are up to something.

great there might be more shit.

14

okay so he finally gets a message from tabini . okay so he is to become the lord of the heavens as well as geigi to be his replacement while he is away. 

so tabini dose not trust jase.

yolanda may have fucked up on the translations.

bren, you are giving me more vibes of a worried wife to a far away husband , please do not give me more reasons to ship you with tabini.

toby sent a message back and have a realisation about his behavior.

barb sends a message and damnit barb , leave him be about that.

gets a bunch of letters by geigi and ilisidi and news from mainland.

bren writes a letter to tabini about what he is planing on doing , worries about the situation and his well wishes to tabini.

he gose to yolanda to try to contact jase.

jase and him agree to meet. 

he sends a letter to barb and toby about what was going to happen.

15

hes in from of the ship and panicking about the future.

he talks with algini and tano to try to take care of everything and yolanda . the two of them are nervous and flushed with flightiness . this is one of the few times the two nervous.

its a freacking count down of 98%

oh my god the bren hugging Algini and Tano scene , oh my gawd so cute . "one dose not hug a atevi , not as a rule . he broke that rule , for his soul's sake , and embarrassed them." algini hugs bren fisrt then tano

the staff are just fucking wonderful.

banichi and jago resure him of his worries and doubts might not be important

jesus bren has anxiety about airplane , why doesn't he get therapy? hope he gets therapy.

ilisidi and caljeiri are there ,the kid looking anxious as ever.

bren is miserable to the title of lord of the heavens. wishes he was back in tobys boat.

geigi asks if yolanda favors fish , bren says she perfers fruit instead.

ilisidi after saying good by to geigi is mad about jase be not there. jase is in a meeting but meets them soon.

ilisidi seriously threatens caljeiri with out supper if he dose not behave about asking about where the ship is steered.

bren notes that the atevi would see pairs or twos as really unerving.

he drags jase back to thank him for the design and to give him the message from yolanda.

this whole chapter is another kind of odd therapy like session exept for jase.

well crap the tape they need is with sabin from jenrette. the other one they may need in in a deeper part of the archives . 

holy hell ilisidi might be able to delay the shit to give them time.

16

Ilisidi , banichi , cenedi , jago and 3 of cenedi's men. 

poor kaplan, having to explain that sabin isn't found in any where.

sabin is pissed  there are on the bridge of the ship.

Calms down when bren is telling her that ilisidi has invited her to suppor . Cheeky bastard is a description sabin gives bren.

Bren is already missing his estate now.

Bundles of stuff floating around in zero gravity and the staff trying to control the scene is kind of funny

Asicho in a bathrobe is a scene I hope some one is able to draw.

He sends a rather sad letter to his mom 

Asicho she helps bren get dressed and ribbon in his hair.

Thanks to bren being the lord of the heavens jago is in a official like relationship with him.

17

He is around in ilisidi diner with those around him .

They are waiting for jase to come by with sabin and the kid is with them. 

Remembering that they are in zero gravity makes so much of the scene just kind of funny that a bunch of them have to float around.

Sabin being disgusted by being offered a pillow.

Wow ilisidi is being Blunt about wanting the tape jase seeks from sabin, even though jase finesse the situation.

Young rascal of a grandson, what a descriptive word for caljeiri from ilisidi

Well the kid thinks it's funny sabin thinks he is 16 instead of six.

Well crap shit starts to hit the fan when he notices a white globe 

Ilisidi did you just give sabin some of the alkaloids that got to bren in the first book? You sneaky fuck

 Jase is upset at how ilisidi and bren may have used the sauces to give her food poisoning to give him a chance to get what they want.

They are getting sabin to the sick bay and bren advises them to give her treatment.

It kind of makes me really happy that bren keeps telling the humans that they are the aliens in the situation.

Holy hell that speech he gave to sabin , is is considered a badass boast , a reason you suck speech , heroic motive speech or a blase boast? 

Jase gets kind of control of the ship .

Revels was trying to keep jase from talking to jenrette about ramirez.

Manages to get sabin to not be be a complete pain and to get the truth about shit going down. 

18

They are at the bridge and bren talks to jase.

They comment that sabin kind of could try to repay the favor of inviting sabin to dinner first.

He misses Bu-javid,  the clutter of things.

Even though he is going to a whole new thing, he is very relived for the first in a long time that no one wanted to kill him.

[beardedmrbean]

Problem is sometimes euthanasia can be the best option for some people

But y'know, everything depends on the situation

There was a young man from the UK, his girlfriend had tossed battery acid in his face.

I'm just going to do this, sticks with me since I think it was the first thing like this I ever really interacted with. Link

A woman threw acid over her former partner in an attack that left him with such "grotesque" injuries Belgian doctors agreed to end his life.

Berlinah Wallace, 49, is accused of murder and applying a corrosive fluid to Dutch engineer Mark van Dongen in Bristol in 2015.

Mr van Dongen ran screaming into the street in his boxer shorts with "horrific" injuries before being taken to hospital, Bristol Crown Court heard.

Ms Wallace denies both charges.

The attack on 23 September left Mr van Dongen, 29, paralysed from the neck down, unrecognisable and all but blinded, Bristol Crown Court heard.

Ms Wallace allegedly laughed and told him "if I can't have you, no-one else can" before throwing a glass of sulphuric acid into his face.

Prosecutor Adam Vaitilingam QC said the defendant "deliberately threw acid at Mr van Dongen, intending to cause him serious harm".

"She admits throwing it but denies any intent to cause him harm. She says that she believed that what she was throwing over him was a glass of water."

(oh yes people often mistake acid for water I'm sure)

Mr Vaitilingam said Mr van Dongen's "physical and mental suffering" drove him to euthanasia.

"Put simply, he could not bear to live in that condition. If that is right, we say, then she is guilty of murder," he added.

The court was told Mr van Dongen suffered 15 months of pain before being granted euthanasia in Belgium, where it is legal and where his family lives, in January 2017.

"He was examined by three consultants, who confirmed that this was, in their terms, a case of unbearable physical and psychological suffering despite maximum medical support," Mr Vaitilingam added.

"They agreed that the test for euthanasia was met, and on 2 January 2017 they inserted a catheter into his heart, which brought about his immediate death." ___________

Not really a fan of euthanasia, but as reasons go, I wouldn't fight anyone over this I don't think.

Now let's go to Canada.

Canada's Veterans Affairs office offered to assist a Paralympian and veteran to commit suicide when she sought to have a wheelchair lift installed in her home, the woman told lawmakers last week.

Christine Gauthier, a 52-year-old retired corporal who competed in the 2016 Paralympics at Rio De Janeiro, testified to lawmakers that a VA official had offered — in writing — to provide her with a medically-assisted suicide kit. The case officer remains unnamed but reportedly made similar offers to at least three other veterans, according to the Independent.

"I have a letter saying that if you’re so desperate, madam, we can offer you MAID, medical assistance in dying," Gauthier said in a hearing before the House of Commons veterans affairs committee.

Prime Minister Justin Trudeau condemned the incident in a public statement on Friday after Gauthier said she personally wrote him a letter on the issue.

(I don't believe for a moment trudeau is displeased with anything about this other than the press it's getting is making him look bad)

This woman here

Wanted one of these

And was given the option of ending her own life instead.

So ya, you're right and I'm showing here 2 fairly extreme ends of the spectrum when it comes to this kind of thing, there should be some dignity allowed out there and you shouldn't be forced to live in excruciating pain where every moment after the morphine wears off leaves you in agony.

He went and made the decision for himself to do what he did and several doctors signed off on it saying, ya dude's fucked and baring a miracle will be beyond miserable for the foreseeable future so we're gonna ok this request, coup de grace, mercy killing.

Then we have a mostly fit veteran, paralympian, athlete that would like to be able to go upstairs in the home they live in and the doctor hands them a brochure that says have you considered suicide. (probably far more tastefully put than that, but still)

So while you are right there are situations that call for it, having EDS shouldn't be one of them, neither should having OCD, Borderline, Schizophrenia or Bipolar,

and being poor should not be a factor included either

OCD, Borderline, Schizophrenia and Bipolar I haven't actually seen if they're offering it to them but with the fact that they are offering to people with mental issues I wouldn't be surprised.

This is not mercy, mercy is helping people heal that can be helped heal, it's a chairlift for someone. it's not a needle so they don't have to fuss with it

Canada's standards for this are already too loose and they're about to get looser, doctors that don't want to treat someone might start pointing folks towards this too.

It's wrong,

[cjsinkythoughts]

In Need of a Breath

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Word Count: 4007

Warnings: !FATWS SPOILERS!, Cursing, Zemo, Feelings, Another PTSD Flashback

A/N: So…Part 4 is going to have a couple parts to it. Maybe even three. I didn’t even make it half way through the episode on this one, mainly because I really wanted to fit in the Reader’s backstory and I wanted her and Sam to have a heart-to-heart again. I’m suuuuper tired, so I probably won’t be posting the next part for another few hours (it’s 5 am right now and I haven’t slept), BUT it’s my day off work and I won’t be doing anything I planned because my grandmother had a stroke a couple days ago so plans have changed and I’m staying in to help her, meaning I’ll mostly be writing all day. 

This Part is kind of a mix between off-screen and shot-by-shots, but it’s mostly off screen/what’s going on inside Reader’s head.

I’m really excited about future parts and the characters that are being introduced! I will say that after these parts, I will be doing one shots of previous MCU movies with the Reader, due to the information that is being given about the Reader now. You kind of see more of how she was affected/how she affected the previous MCU movies and what she was doing during that time.

Like always, this hasn’t been beta’d, again it’s SUPER early in the morning, and I’m really tired, so please excuse any mistakes! I hope you guys enjoy this part! Stay tuned for more to come later today!

FATWS MASTERLIST

cjsinkythoughts MASTERLIST

!SPOILERS UNDER CUT!

“You know…I’m really starting to regret saying yes to this.” You huffed out, craning your neck and squinting your eyes against the sun as you stare at the facility in front of you, hating the skin-crawling feeling of being back.

“Would you relax? Whenever you’re nervous, I get nervous, and I don’t wanna be nervous about this.” Sam shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

“Do either of you have a better plan?” Bucky grumbled, crossing his arms.

Gnawing on your lips, you finally take the lead and breathe out, “alright. Let’s go then.” You could feel the hesitance from your - what were they? Partners? Coworkers? Teammates? - the fellas before they started after you.

There was a sick twist in your gut as you entered the building, going through the lobby and security.

You had been there.

You had been there when Zemo impersonated Bucky. You had been there when Zemo unleashed the Winter Soldier at the Joint Counter Terrorist Centre Building in Berlin. You had been there during the battle at the airport. You had been there when Zemo turned Tony and Steve against each other in Siberia. You had been there when Zemo tore the Avengers from the inside out. Your family. The only family you’d ever known.

But you’d always been good about pushing your personal feelings aside for the sake of the mission. It’s what you’d been born to do. All you ever knew.

“Hey. Doll. You hear me?”

“Hmm. What?” You looked up from the ground to look into those enchanting blue oceans Bucky had for eyes, staring worriedly down at you, eyebrows pinched and forehead creased.

“I’m going in alone.” You frowned, opening your mouth to argue, but he shook his head. “Sam already agreed-”

“I didn’t necessarily agree-”

“You’re an Avenger, sweetheart.” Bucky tilted his head, speaking softly, those eyes of his worried. Worried for you. It made your stomach flip. “And you were there in Siberia, and that almost makes it worse. Especially considering you went after him. Just…just let me do this, okay?”

You cracked your knuckles nervously as you thought. It was a terrible idea. But it was an idea. And it was all they had. “Okay.” You finally relented, shrugging as your hands hit your thighs and slid up to your hips. “But don’t do anything stupid.”

“Steve took all that with him.”

Knowing about their little inside joke, you scoffed. “Sure he did. Go before I change my mind.”

You watched him walk down the hallway, hands fidgeting with excess nerves. “I think you’re the only one he actually seeks approval from.”

“Good thing I’m so lenient then, huh?” You joked, turning to Sam with a strained smile. Your smile slipped at the curious expression on Sam’s face, his eyes darting to each of your features. “What?”

“Are you doing okay?”

You groaned, throwing your head back. You thought you got out of talking about your feelings back in Baltimore. “Oh my God, Sam-”

“I’m serious. You…you just don’t seem like yourself.”

You shook your head, looking down the hall to where Bucky disappeared before turning back to him. It was weird to have a self that people recognized. Your whole life you’d been searching for it and when you finally found it…everything went to shit. “Honestly, Sammy, the only time I’ve ever felt like myself was with the team. Zemo took that away from me and now we’re here, practically begging him for help.”

Sam hummed, leaning against the wall. “Have you thought of taking a break?”

“What?”

“A break.” At your bewildered look, he rolled his eyes. “Cher, this time last year most of us were dead. This time a few months ago you found out about Wanda. This time last week you were out looking for her. Maybe you should just stop and take a breather.”

Shoving your hands in your pocket and looking at the floor, you couldn’t help but snort at his advice. “I haven’t taken a breather since I was eighteen.”

He clicked his tongue. “That’s my point. FBI academy as soon as you graduated. SHIELD recruit by 21, undercover operations leader by 24? Slow down. You’re in your thirties. Next thing you know, you’re gonna be ninety something, lying on your deathbed, wishing you had stopped to smell the roses.”

“If I live to be ninety, shoot me.” He chuckled in amusement. “I’m so fucking serious, Sam. I will not be put in an old folks home to play Bingo and be pushed around in a wheelchair. It ain’t happening.”

“I’ll see what I can do.” There was that infectious smile, which you unconsciously grinned back at. “Y/N…I’m serious. You’ve been in and out of missions since you were a teenager. What’s the shortest undercover operation you’ve done?”

“I dunno.”

He gave you an unimpressed look. “Yeah you do.”

Licking your lips, you turned away and shrugged. “A couple months. Seven weeks and three days, to be precise. September to October in 2012.”

“And the longest?”

“August 2007 to May 2009. Twenty one months.” 

Letting out a puff of air through his nose, Sam pushed himself off the wall and caught your chin between his fingers to make you look at him. “That’s nearly two years under cover. And I’m sure you went right back under after-”

“I was sitting at a desk for four months doing paperwork on it.” You defended yourself.

He shook his head, brows knitting together, lips drawn down. “You say that as if four months is enough time.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore, Sammy. I’m out. I’ve been out since Ultron and Sokovia. I haven’t been under in almost a decade-”

“A decade half the world was dead for half of-”

“I wasn’t!”

“I never said you were.” Sam sighed, closing his eyes for a moment. You were always amazed at his ability to keep his emotions in check. To stay cool under pressure. Sometimes you forgot how experienced he was with dealing with other people’s trauma. It was no wonder why Steve thought he’d be good for Bucky. “Listen. All I’m saying is once this is done…don’t go diving back into searching for Wanda. Don’t go running to the kid every time he calls - and I know you’ve been doing that-”

“It’s just been homework and stuff-”

“Y/N.” You stopped, biting your lip at the stern look he gave you. “Go home. Order take out. Binge watch TV. Go for a jog through the park. Actually meet your neighbors. Go grocery shopping. Just…live. If only for a couple weeks. Don’t worry about anyone else. Don’t pick up the phone, don’t drop everything because someone needs you. You need you.”

“I-I…” You shook your head, looking at him, sincerely apologetic. “I can’t. I wish I could. But I can’t. I’ve never had one normal day in my life. I’ve never had someone to care for, never had someone to care for me. I can’t let people I’ve come to…I can’t let them think I don’t care. I don’t even know where I’d go.”

“Whaddya mean?”

You winced, not thrilled for his reaction to your next statement. “I, uh, I sold my apartment in D.C.”

He gaped at you in complete disbelief. “You got it in December!”

“I know, I know. I liked it. I really did, but…I dunno. Nomadic life has always suited me better. It’s what I grew up with.”

He took a breath, making you cringe again. You don’t think you’ve ever legitimately gotten on his nerves like this before. “Have you ever thought that, instead of going with the flow and jumping place to place, putting down roots might actually help?” He cut you off before you could say anything, holding up a finger to stop you from talking. “I can’t imagine going from foster home to foster home like you did. I can’t imagine not having a home for as long as you can remember. Louisiana’s my home. Always has, always will be. But I understand your life has been anything but stable. And maybe, just maybe, that’s why you need some stability.”

You clenched your jaw, crossing your arms. “The Avengers were my stability. Steve was my stability.”

“Because you loved him.”

“I’m not doing this with you again.” You turned to walk down to the lobby to wait for Bucky there, but Sam caught your arm.

“You were in love with him! It’s okay! You two were super close! No one would blame you! Why won’t you just admit it? I’m trying to understand! Why won’t you-”

You tugged your arm away, finally snapping at him. “Because he could never be mine, Wilson! Is that what you wanna hear?!” Sam took a step back at your exclamation. You closed your eyes, swallowing the lump in your throat and pushing down the tears. “He could preach all he wanted about moving forwards, Sammy, but we all knew he was stuck in the past. He visited the museum every Thursday because her interview showed in his exhibit on Thursdays. He carried around that broken compass because her picture was in it.” You looked back up at him sadly, shrugging. “And I get it; it’s hard to move past your first love. I get it because…that’s what he was to me.”

There was a silence that blanketed the hallway, before he spoke up hesitantly. “What about Bucky?”

“I thought - I thought I was projecting my feelings for Steve onto him because I knew Steve couldn’t ever…”

Sam raised an eyebrow. “You thought? What do you think now?”

You cleared your throat. “I’m still figuring that one out.”

“If you ever need to talk, I’ll be here.”

You chuckled, nodding slightly towards him. “Back atcha. Don’t think I haven’t noticed you not being yourself lately, either.”

“It’s…a tough topic.”

You nodded in understanding. “Just know that I’ll support every decision you make as long as you think it’s the right one. Because I trust you. Steve trusted you. It’s all we can do to try to do what’s right. That’s what makes you a good man, Sammy. He gave you that shield for a reason, and if you think what you did was right…I’ll stand by it.”

The two of you stared at each other for a moment, calming down in each other’s presences and taking comfort knowing you’d be there for each other through thick and thin. “Thank you, cher.”

“Of course, Sammy. Now let’s go see what’s taking the old grump so long.”

He laughed at that, nodding in agreement, taking your offered hand and squeezing it as you made your way down the hall.

****************

“What?”

Bucky eyed you as you spluttered, coughing on the water you were drinking. “Please don’t choke, doll.”

“Break him out of jail?!” You repeated his words and blinked at him, absolutely baffled by his plan. “Oh my God.” You groaned as Bucky and Sam started arguing, moving your flashlight around the room. “Where the hell are we?” There was no response as they kept going back and forth.

“Zemo’s gonna mess with our minds! Especially yours! No offense.”

“Heelllloooo!” You tried again. “Where the hell are we?!”

Bucky turned on the lights, giving Sam a look. “Offense.” Glancing at you he quirked an eyebrow. “Stop worrying your pretty lil’ head, sweetheart. You trust me, dontcha?” Your breath hitched at his words. You quickly recovered, huffing and pouting - although you’d deny ever pouting - and crossing your arms. You stood between the guys like that, eyes darting to whoever was speaking, waiting for them to stop so you could actually think.

“Look. Let me just walk you through a hypothetical. Can I walk you through a hypothetical?”

You and Sam exchanged glances. “What did you do?”

“I…didn’t do…anything.” Bucky shrugged.

“How is it that you, one of the most deadliest assassins basically ever, are one of the worst liars I know.” You tilted your head at him, an eyebrow quirking up in confusion.

“Shush it you. Just, okay. The weakest point in any system isn’t the software, the hardware, it’s the meatware. The human element.”

The more you listened to Bucky’s “hypothetical”, the stronger the gut feeling telling you this was a terrible terrible idea got. You brought your hands up to your head, eyes wide as he spoke.

“I don’t like how casual you’re bein’ about this. This is unnatural.”

You couldn’t help but agree with Sam’s words, your head falling back and your eyes closing. “Sweet Jesus. Listen, God, I know we don’t talk much these days, but please, please don’t let this not be a hypothetical. I’m fucking begging you.”

A noise to your right made your head snap over. “Oh hell to the fucking no!” You shook your head as Zemo himself walked in, wearing a prison guards uniform. “Uh-uh! No way! Bucky, this was not part of the plan!”

“What did you do?!”

“We need him!”

“You’re going back to prison.”

“If I may-”

All three of you faced him, simultaneously shouting, “no!”

You held your face in your hands as your head dropped, shaking back and forth, your eyes squeezing shut, tuning them out for just a minute to think. Bucky had a point. The enemy of my enemy is my friend and all that, and the Avengers were technically disbanded, which was Zemo’s whole objective in the first place, but…God. You were good at compartmentalizing, but not that much. You were willing to put your feelings aside for the mission so Bucky could talk to him. Not for you to work with him. But he had connections, you knew he did, and he had information…

“Doll?” You looked up, Bucky anxiously licking his lips as he met your gaze. “I need you to say something.”

You looked to Sam, who shrugged, gesturing to Zemo. “What do you think?”

What did you think? What did you think?! You thought that it was the worst idea in the history of ideas and you should turn back and find another way! But…you knew this was the fastest, probably most reliable way to get information that you needed.

Dammit, since when were you the deciding factor?

You sucked in a breath, looking over Sam’s shoulder at Zemo, who lifted his hand in greeting. You raised your eyes to the ceiling, pointing your finger accusingly. “This is why we stopped talking.” Gaze dropping to the still waiting fellas, you gnawed on your lip, before hissing out, “ffffine…” Running a hand through your hair, you threw your hands up as you shrugged. “Fine. Okay. Fine.”

“Okay.” Sam nodded, taking charge again.

You couldn’t believe this was happening. Except, that was a lie. You could. You’d seen weirder. You’d experienced the impossible. Lived through the unbelievable. This…this was completely imaginable.

Which is why, with a lot of hesitation and very little confidence in this plan, you followed Zemo through the auto shop you were in until you reached a large room with a ton of different old cars.

Bucky’s hand found yours as Zemo explained what the plan was, rather vaguely, in your opinion, but at least he was explaining. Point for him. Not that it would make up for the level of distrust you held for him, but it was something.

You looked up at him, giving him a puzzling frown. He usually only grabbed your hand in front of other people when he was feeling anxious. Which, yeah, he had a right to be anxious right now, but it wasn’t the right kind. The type of anxiety caused by large crowds and loud noises, ones that startled him and threw him into a defensive mode.

But the look on his face made you squeeze his hand in reassurance. He was pouting, staring at you although he did something wrong - a puppy that tore up a pillow - and all you wanted to do was give him a hug.

“You’re mad at me.” He mumbled as the four of you headed out with Zemo in the lead.

“No I’m not.”

“Yeah you are. 

“Bucky, I’m not mad.”

“Listen, if I had a better idea I wouldn’t-”

You brought your linked hands up to your lips, pressing a gentle kiss to his gloved knuckles. “I’m not mad.” You repeated more firmly. “It’s just…a lot for me, right now.”

“Why? What’s going on?”

“Nothing’s going on, Buck, I-I just…” You thought about your and Sam’s earlier conversation and suddenly understood what he meant. “I need to breathe for a second.”

His features twisted into ones of uncertainty, eyes squinting as you stepped outside. “Do you…do you wanna leave?”

You shook your head, tugging his arm to stop him and grabbing the sunglasses on his collar, slipping them over his eyes. “No. I just need some time to think. Hopefully the plane ride to wherever the hell we’re going will give me that.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, James. I’m sure.”

He lowered the glasses on his nose to scan you over the frames, before nodding and sliding them back up. “Okay. You ready for this, then?”

“No.” You breathed, turning back to where Zemo and Sam were still walking. “Let’s do this.”

*****************

Climbing onto the private jet, you raised an eyebrow at Sam, who shrugged, giving you a bemused expression. A Baron…huh…who knew? You feel like you should’ve, yet there you were.

You sat besides Bucky, across from Zemo, crossing your legs and leaning back while staring at him through narrowed eyes.

His butler seemed nice, which made you even more suspicious. You obviously didn’t know as much about Zemo as you wanted to. It was a habit you picked up after years of undercover work; once the mission was complete, that was that. There was no looking back on it. No sitting on it. It was over and you moved onto the next one. It was a bad habit in cases like this.

The moment you spotted the notebook over Zemo’s book you knew something was going to happen, yet you still flinched when Bucky lunged at him, grabbing his throat. You leaned back in your seat again, steadying your now racing heartbeat. You decided you were too tense, trying to relax your muscles as Bucky sat back down in his seat.

“I’ve seen that book. It was Steve’s when he came out of the ice. I told him about Trouble Man. He wrote it in that book.” Sam seemed so proud of himself that something he recommended was written in Steve’s little book and it made you smile.

You remembered that; Steve and you were supposed to meet up for coffee after his run, but Fury called him in so you rescheduled it for when he got back. He asked you about Marvin Gaye. For your opinion. You told him to check it out and make his own.

You remembered asking him about that little notebook of his, and he just shrugged you off telling you about his list. He would read items off to you, but he never let you read the book yourself. You never found out why, and you supposed you never would now. The thought made an ache behind your ribs that you’d come to familiarize yourself with appear.

You smiled a little more as Zemo and Sam told Bucky how awesome Marvin Gaye was. “C’mon, baby. Back me up.”

Chuckling, you looked at Bucky. “They’re not wrong. But,” you quickly added before Bucky could whine at you, facing Sam again. “Neither is Buck. I mean, c’mon. You can’t find music like the 40’s anymore. Ella Fitzgerald, Louis Armstrong, Benny Goodman, Fred Astaire. Ol’ Blue Eyes himself.”

“Thank you.” Bucky grinned at Sam, who rolled his eyes.

“Okay, okay. But, I mean, c’mon! Everybody loves Marvin Gaye.”

“I like Marvin Gaye.”

“Steve adored Marvin Gaye.”

Your face fell as Zemo started talking about Steve and icons and Red Skull, your mind once again slipping away from reality.

~

“Kids love you.” You giggled as you finally made it out of his exhibit. You’d wanted to show it to him since he moved to D.C., and you’d finally got an opportunity after coming back from being undercover for ten weeks. “You’re their hero, you know.”

“Yeah, well, I’m just trying to do what’s right.”

You nudged him, scoffing at his answer. “You’re too humble. You’re a national icon, you know.”

Steve shrugged, looking around the museum at the planes surrounding them. “I never wanted to be.”

“Why not? Everyone loves you.”

“I’m sure not everyone loves me.” He rolled his eyes. “And…I just wanted to help. To fight. Protect my country and the people I cared about. I-I didn’t ask for…all that.” He waved behind his shoulder where his exhibit was getting smaller with each step they took away. “People were dying. Bullies were winning.”

You shook your head, spinning and walking backwards besides him to face him. “Sure, but you did that. And you became someone people could look up to in the process.”

He narrowed his eyes at you before asking, “why do you do what you do?”

“...because I’m good at it?”

“Honey.” He gave you a look. “Answer the question.”

You hummed in thought. “Because I couldn’t stand by, knowing there would be orphaned kids if I didn’t help any way I could.”

“Alright. Why do you do it in the dark?”

“Whaddya mean?”

He shrugged. “Why don’t you come out and take credit for all the lives you’ve saved?”

“Because that’s not why I do it. I don’t want that attention. I just want to know I’ve helped people. I’ve kept them safe.”

He gave you a soft smile. “I just wanted to beat the bully. I never wanted to be a dancing monkey, too.” You looked at him in a new light then, understanding where he was coming from. “Watch out, honey!” He grabbed you and pulled you aside before you could crash into a wall, arms wrapped firmly around your waist. He gave you that charming smile of his. “Wouldn’t want you hurting that pretty lil’ head of yours, now would we?”

~

“Y/N!”

You snapped back into the conversation, moving your eyes from the window to Bucky, who tilted his head, eyebrows pinched and eyes narrowed. “Sorry. So, Madripoor. That’s a fun place.”

You ignored the side eyed glances Bucky and Sam exchanged, Sam turning to you curiously. “You’ve been?”

“Once. Back in 2010 for a few months”

Zemo raised his eyebrows. “You’re lucky to have gotten out.”

You shrugged nonchalantly. “Lucky, maybe. Skills were a part of it, too, though.”

“Good.” Zemo nodded. “Because we’re going undercover…and if we blow it. We’re dead.”

You breathed out, shaking your memory away and getting your head back into the game. Because like the man you were severely wary of in front of you said, if you blew this, you were dead. And, sure, you didn’t want to live until ninety, but you weren’t even half way there yet. So dammit if you were going to die soon.

“Hey.” You looked over at Bucky’s murmur, his head tilting as he grabbed your hand and pulled you from your seat closer to him. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I’m fine. Are you okay? You know you’re going to have to be-”

“I know.” He nodded. You watched his Adam’s Apple bob as he swallowed thickly. “I’ll be fine. Just…tell me right now if you need to step out for this one.”

You gave him a smile that you knew he didn’t buy, just by the slight narrowing of his eye, his lips pressing together. “No. No, I’m good for this. If you think I’m gonna let you two idiots go into Madripoor with him - alone - oil that cyborg brain of yours, because there’s no way.”

He squeezed your hand, eyes still filled with uncertainty. “Are you sure?”

“If there’s even a slight possibility that I can protect you, then yeah. I’m sure, Buckaroo.”

[reporterleroux]

hey hey!

Do you think you could do a platonic Michael afton x Masc! reader where Micheal is kinda like an older brother figure to the reader? :3

I've done this with Teen and Adult Mike! Also, could you guys say if you want blueycapsules or fnaf when you request?? /nf I know there's not much difference between the two but it makes it easier for me to know where to put tags and stuff :D

Brotherly Antics

(Masc reader, as per request! I'll use he/him for this one ❤️)

Teen Michael

Hurricane, Utah. 4th September, 1983. The new school year had just begun, and neither you or Michael were looking forward to the actual school part of it. Michael was looking forward to the bullying people, you were more looking forward to just simply seeing your friends again. Michael was one of them. You spent alot of time together, but he bullied you at the same time. "Don't worry, I don't actually mean it. It's a brotherly way." He said some time ago. You decided to believe him and shrug it off. Not that you fully trusted what he said, he still bullied you relentless anyways, but recently you've noticed he hasn't ever physically beat you up like he would with other kids. He's made joking insults and shoved you around a little, and that's about it. You were stood thinking until you were shoved to the floor, right in front of your locker. You looked up to see who it was. Michaels friends. Great. "Well, what's this? Some bait Michaels pulled in for us? This is great, boys!" The one in the bear mask said. They all wore masks matching the animatronics at Freddy Fazbears, and it was kinda strange to you. You only liked Michaels because you knew his passion for the animatronic he had a mask of. "So, who's striking first?" Now you were starting to panic. You could defend yourself, but not against these guys. These guys seemed to be an entire different teir to you. Your thoughts started drifting away, and you couldn't hear what they were saying anymore. One of the boys raised his fist. To your own suprise, all you did in reaction was close your eyes and brace for impact. But there was none. You opened your eyes to the sight of Michael grabbing his friend, forcing him away from you. You stood up and stepped back, watching. What was he doing? Why was he defending you against his friends? All you heard was "I'll get him someday!" Before Michael grabbed your wrist and pulled you away to a space under the bleachers outside. "You okay? I saw what was happening at the last minute. I couldn't let them do that to you." You just blinked in confusion. You were friends, but you didn't think you were friends enough for him to defend you againt his own friendgroup, which bare in mind, he has known longer than you. "Yeah I'm fine, just confused. Why did you defend me? I didn't think we were friendly enough for that. Plus, you've known those guys longer than me." He rubbed the back of his neck, chuckling a little. "You're like a brother to me, Y/N. The younger brother I lost to then get back. I didn't want you getting hurt that way." It all finally clicked in your head. It made sense. "Brother figure..." You thought. "I like that." You smiled at him. "Thank you. It means a lot more than I can show, alot more than you think." And with that you pulled him into a hug. He was shocked at first. Kind, physical affection? In a kind, family way? He could've cried there and then, but he didn't. Instead he hugged you back, tighter than you hugged him. He pulled back, smiling. "So, wanna go do something before lunch ends?" You both nodded and made your way to do something different this lunch time.

You decided to always defend eachother any time they needed it.

Adult Michael

"I fucking hate this job." You complained, leaning back in the low quality chair. Michael let out a low and quiet chuckle. "Yeah, me too. Having my best friend and brother here makes it better though." It had been a few years since you two met, and you quickly became brother figures to one another. You both managed to get on the nightshift together, which was great news for both of you. But, the constant fear of death from the animatronics wasn't. Michael had got the job before you, so he agreed to do doors while you agreed to do the cameras. "Freddy, left hallway." That was how you usually called the shots. There was no possible way to switch the cameras off, so they were always on. You only really checked the side halls and pirate cove, because Michael is quick to shut the doors and Foxy was a shared favourite of yours, so you both wanted to see him. On a good night you'd only have to shut the doors once or twice. On a bad night, however, those numbers could at max, quadruple. "Almost 6am. Thank god, we can finally get out of here." He was right. It was 5:58am, and both shifts ended at 6. You took this moment to relax, knowing that every night they didn't really move when it got to this time, having one on the odd occasion. "My god, I'm sleeping like a baby once we get home." You both laughed at your remark. "Yeah, me too. This job can be tiring." You nodded. As you were about to speak again, the familiar 6am alarm went off, signifying the end of the shift, and you two were out faster than you could say Fazbears. You both headed home, with the side track of familiar record shops and food places along the way.

All you really need is a brotherly relationship.

Here we go!! That's all my requests done :D feel free to send more if you wish, but now I'm gonna revise for my English exam tomorrow 💔

[taestefully-in-luv]

Always You | JJK (Eight-Part 1)

Summary: you and Jungkook have been best friends since freshmen year of college, there’s a lot of unsaid feelings and tension but neither make a move. what happens when his friend Taehyung (also your crush) needs a fake girlfriend?

Pairing: Jungkook x Female reader

Genre: friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, slight slow burn, roommate au, college au, SMUT (starting ch2), fluff, angst (in later chapters) slight crack, lots of drama

Word Count: 11.5k (part 1)

Warnings: Swearing, alcohol consumption, sexual tension (!!!), mentions of sex, oc struggles with her future, mentions of vibrator, mentions of cum eating, dirty talk, vaginal fingering, oral (female receiving), masturbation, swallowing

Notes: I am having to post this chapter in two parts, I am so sorry about that! But here it is!! Hope you guys enjoy this chapter:) feel free to send an ask if you want to be added to the taglist or just want to chat about the story:) I LOVE talking with ya’ll!

Taglist: @mooniyooni @thisartemisnevermisses @giadalin @kookiebunny097 @cosmosjk @moonchild1 @just-jeon @anpanman-sonyeondan @starlight-night0 @yessii-i @apollukee @mikasaredscarf1 @kaye-rosales @bunnyjeonjk @dyriddle @aclowe13 @bishuthot @271101 @seagulljk @hass-mich-los @peachy-skz0325 @wonusbitch @not-your-lion @flowersgirl02 @justinetingball @fiantomartell @fairysunooo @taebae19

© taestefully-in-luv

Previous ---- Next

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

September

“What about this one?” You hold up another birthday banner, showing Vanessa yet another option.

“Ugly.” She says.

This is the fourth fucking birthday banner you’ve shown her and she doesn’t approve of any of them. But you have to admit this one is a little ugly.

“Vanessa…” you groan out, getting very obviously frustrated.

“I like this one.” She points to a banner. The very first one you showed her.

“Seriously?” you grab the banner and place it in your cart. “Okay, we still have to pick up the cake at 3. And we need to make sure we have enough plates for everyone…oh! We also still have to pick up the bottles at the liquor store.”

“I can get the cake.” She replies smoothly.

“We can just go together?”

Today is Jungkook’s birthday and you and Vanessa have been (Kind of) texting throughout the last week trying to find a good day to meet up. The day happened to be today of all days, so you’re feeling quite rushed.

“Fine.” Vanessa picks at her cuticles, just standing here looking gorgeous.

You on the other hand…were not expecting this to be a fashion show! You’re in shorts and a t shirt while she wears a flowy green dress and sandals.

“I want to be the one to present his cake to him though,” Vanessa begins, her eyes never leaving her fingers, “I am his girlfriend after all.”

You hate that your chest tightens at her words, you hate how her words affect you like this, how she affects you like this. Just being in her presence alone makes your heart twist.

“Got it.” You place some birthday plates in the cart, “So…what did you get him for his birthday?” you try to make conversation.

“A cologne.”

“You know he’s sensitive to smells—”

“He likes this one.”

“Oh.”

“I know him better than you think y/n.” her smooth voice cuts you like a butcher knife.

You nod your head, not knowing what to say. Maybe she does. But like, you still know him better right? You got to, right?

“What about you?” Vanessa lifts her eyes to meet yours, her eyes are small and dark and inviting.

“Uh, to be honest…I’m meeting with Jimin after this so we can go shopping for his gifts. So, I don’t know yet but I have an idea.”

“And what’s your idea?” her eyes go back down to her nails that she keeps picking at.

“Friendship bracelets.” You state.

“Hm.” Vanessa pushes the cart forward and walks towards the isle with candles. “We still need nice candles for the cake.”

“Right.”

~~~~~~~

“It couldn’t have been that bad, babe.” Jimin holds up a plain black hoodie and nods approvingly. “Another one for his collection, what do you think?”

“Looks like something I’d steal, so yes.” You give him a quick thumbs up, “And it was bad dude. She’s so hard to talk to!”

“Yeah, I could see that.” Jimin stands in front of a full body length mirror and checks himself out, pushing his hair out of his face. “Forehead or no forehead, tonight?”

“Hmm, no forehead.”

“Forehead it is.”

“Wow, you never listen to me!”

Jimin chuckles wholeheartedly, shrugging his shoulders like he agrees with you.

“So, where are these bracelets you keep going on about?”

“That one weird shop buy the smoothie place has these cute bracelets with letters for names on them! I was thinking I could get him a black one with my initial on it and I would get myself one with his initial.”

“You guys are so…that’s cute I guess.” Jimin giggles, he holds up his wrist as if imagining himself with the bracelet. “I want one too!” he whines.

“Maybe for your birthday.” You wink. “Anyway, do you think Vanessa knows Jungkook better than me?”

Jimin stops walking to get a look at you, an expressions that reads: Are you serious? Plastered on his face.

“It’s a valid question.” You say.

“No one knows Jungkook like you honey.”

“Okay…Also, you’ll be meeting my friend Yoongi tonight!”

“The not date, date guy?” Jimin pouts, “I thought you weren’t going to lead him on…”

You scrunch up your face in confusion,

“I can have friends Jimin, I’m not leading him on!” you try to defend.

“If you say so. Just like, try to focus on one boy at a time, you know?” Jimin teases.

You two walk to the shop that sells the bracelets and go inside. You find the bracelets you’re looking for rather quickly, feeling nice and lucky. You grab them and go to pay, when you finish up at the register you notice a Jack Skellington key chain and add it on to Jungkook’s gifts. You always have trouble finding good gifts for people, okay? You take what you can get.

“Shit, it’s already 6. I still need to go home and get ready!”

~~~~~

Nick lets you and Vanessa use their place as the spot to celebrate, it’s bigger than your place and Vanessa agrees saying it’s bigger than hers as well. Nick and his bro that believes in aliens (You really got to learn his name but at this point you are too afraid to ask) are the only ones here as you and Vanessa set up.

“Bro AI is out to get us man—” Aaanndd you are tuning him out, you watch as Nick listens closely, nodding his head every few minutes and whispering ‘Bro’. You and Vanessa hang up decorations in silence, the sound of Nick and his bro chatting away filling the room.

“People should start arriving soon…” you try to make small talk with Vanessa, she only hums in response not even sparing you a glance.

“You look nice.” You try giving her a compliment, she turns her head to the side to look at you and a sly smile grows on her face.

“Do you have feelings for Jungkook?”

You immediately choke on your fucking spit, what the actual fuck? You try to compose yourself when you hear the front door opening. Thank God.

“It is I!” You know that voice. “Where is my Jungkookie?” You hear Jin entering the living room along with Namjoon and Hobi.

“Jimin should be bringing him in the next 30 or so minutes!” you yell out. Once Jin and the other two boys spot you they light up.

“y/n!!!” Jin hurries to your side and bring you in for a quick hug. “How are you?!”

“Good, good.” You laugh, hugging him back.

“Good to see you y/n” Namjoon says with a soft smile and then you hear your named being shouted even though Hobi is a foot away from you.

“Long time no see!!!” He hugs you, shaking you around in his embrace. You can’t help but chuckle at your friend.

“Hi guys, I’m so glad you could make it.”

“Would we miss our Jungkookie’s birthday? No way.” Jin says.

“Oh,” you turn around to see Vanessa just standing behind you, not saying anything just staring. “This is Vanessa. Jungkook’s—”

“We know!” Hobi says, “Jungkook has brought her to Jin’s. Nice to see you again Vanessa!”

Vanessa tilts her head and nods, her lips not even attempting to curve into a smile.

“You too.” She finally says.

This girl either has no manners or just does not know how to properly socialize? Maybe she gets anxiety being around too many people?

You feel your phone buzz.

Yoongs 7:14pm

Im outside

“Be right back guys, a friend of mine just got here.” You try talking over your group of friends. You head towards the front door, swinging it open to a Min Yoongi waiting patiently.

He smiles at you when he sees you, he holds up a bottle of wine and shakes it around a bit.

“For the party.” He says.

“Perfect, let’s pour us a glass right now!” you gesture him to enter the apartment.

You two walk into the kitchen, and you start searching for a wine bottle opener but can’t seem to find it.

“Hey Nick!” You yell out, hoping to get his attention, “Where’s the wine opener?”

Nick shuffles into the kitchen and gives you an expression that screams he has no idea.

“I know where it’s at.” Vanessa’s silky voice fills your ears as she enters the kitchen.

“Oh.” Of course she does. Why wouldn’t Vanessa know? She probably comes here more than you do…

“Thanks.” You finally say when she hands you the wine opener.

“Well, let’s open this baby up!” you turn to face Yoongi and he smiles at you.

“Hi Vanessa.” Yoongi waves at the girl and she hums in response, walking out of the kitchen.

“Sorry, she’s…” but you don’t know what to say. Also, why are you trying to excuse her?

You pour you and Yoongi a glass and gulp it down quickly, you finish your first glass in just seconds.

“I need another one.”

“What’s got you so stressed in a time of celebration?” Yoongi casually sips on his wine, one baby sip after the other.

“Nothing, nothing.”

“y/n…” his soft tone makes you feel comforted already and he hasn’t even said anything yet.

“I don’t know how to say it without sounding psychotic.” You admit, pouring yourself your second glass of wine.

“Try me.”

“I feel like I am competing…with…”

“With Vanessa?” He gladly finishes for you.

“Yeah, like…I don’t know, I feel like she’s trying to take my place. But my place isn’t ‘girlfriend’ so I don’t know what I’m freaking out about.”

Yoongi sets his glass down and studies you for a moment, you begin to feel antsy under his gaze.

“I’m obviously on your side,” Yoongi begins in a hushed voice, “But maybe she’s worried too?”

“I wish I knew if she felt worried, or felt like, anything. This girl is hard to crack!” you quietly say.

“Just try to enjoy the night, okay?” Yoongi smiles and you don’t even feel like smiling back but you do. Suddenly, you feel your phone going off.

Jungkook 7:32pm

Why is Jimin making me dress up? I thought it was just a couple of us? Why do I need to look nice, I’m tired from work

Jungkook 7:33pm

Seriously y/n…it’s just a couple of us, right?

y/n 7:35pm

omg yes Jungkook it’s nothing big I swear, he just wants you to look nice for pictures

Jungkook 7:36pm

I always look nice for pics lol

y/n 7:38pm

No comment

Jungkook 7:40pm

Don’t be fukin rude

` y/n 7:40pm

Can you guys hurry up?

Jungkook 7:44pm

Jimin is in the mirror deciding if he’s showing his forehead or not

y/n 7:45pm

classic Jimin

Jungkook 7:45pm

Classic Jimin

You stuff your phone in your back pocket and grab your glass of wine and begin sipping on it again. Yoongi eyes you up and smirks.

“That the birthday boy?”

“Hm? Oh, sorry…yes. He and Jimin should be here soon.” You watch as Yoongi nods his head and then you realize…”Oh my god, let me introduce you to the guys!” you set your glass down on the counter and reach for Yoongi’s hand and pull him towards the living room. Unfortunately for you, you miss the way Yoongi blushes at the contact.

“Guys, guys.” You interrupt the boys from their conversations, “This is my friend Yoongi…” you gesture towards the boy, “Yoongi, this is Jin…Namjoon, Hobi, and Nick and his pal, uh…” you blink at Alien Dude and he just grins at you, not realizing you don’t know his fucking name. “Yeah, anyway.” You decide to move on, “Jungkook and Jimin should be here soon—” Suddenly, there is soft knocking on the door. You raise a brow because who else could it be?

You walk towards the front door and look through the peep hole and much to your surprise you see Holly and Trina waiting outside the door. You’re quick to open it with a wide smile on your face.

“I thought you didn’t want to come?” You ask, your question directed towards Trina.

“I…” her eyes slide to Holly, “…Had a change of heart.” She huffs out quietly.

“You’re going to be civil?” you smirk at your friend and she rolls her eyes at you.

“She’s going to be more than civil.” Holly pipes up, “She’s going to be nice.”

“Hey we never agreed to that!” Trina crosses her arms over her chest, “But whatever.”

“Thanks for coming T.” your smirk transitions into a soft smile. This means a lot to you, that Trina is trying to accept Jungkook.

“Well? Are you going to let us in or what?”

“Right, right.” You move to the side and let the girls through. They step inside and make their way towards the boys.

“Oh? You must be Mister Oatmeal Raisin!” Trina grins towards Yoongi, who stands here chatting with Hobi.

“You’re…let me guess, Trina? And you must be Holly?” he nods at both girls, “I’ve heard a lot about you two.”

“I hope good things?” Trina teases.

“Only the best.” Yoongi raises his glass to her and she turns her head to smirk at you.

You watch as everyone gets along, talking, laughing and having a good time—all except Vanessa. She is sitting on the sofa on her phone, tapping away. She doesn’t even try to converse with any of Jungkook’s friends? Strange. You hate her, technically. But you can’t help but feel bad? Like, why does she isolate herself so much? Does she really just have some social anxiety or something? There’s got to be a reason for her odd behavior.

“Hey.” You say, sitting on the sofa next to her. “You okay?”

“Hm?” Vanessa doesn’t look up from her phone as she barely acknowledges you.

“Why don’t you come hang out with the rest of us?”

Vanessa tilts her head to get a look at you and she blinks at you repeatedly.

“Why?” she finally asks. “I’m only here for Jungkook.”

Okay, ouch.

“Oh...well—”

“You never answered my question from earlier,” Vanessas coy smile begins growing on her face. “How you feel about Jungkook.”

You feel your palms get sweaty when you process her words. How the hell do you respond to that?

“I—I…” Then the front door is opening and you hear Jimin obnoxiously announce their arrival, that he has the birthday boy.

You immediately jump to your feet and rush towards the entrance of the apartment to greet your friends.

“Too bad you can’t admit it, “ Vanessa whispers, her eyes going back to her phone, “I could help you too.”

“JUNGKOOKIE!!!” Jin opens his arms wide, “Come and embrace me! It’s your birthday gift.” Jungkook stumbles in the apartment with wide eyes as he searches the living room. His eyes find yours and he smiles. He shows you his bunny grin and you can’t help but smile back. He looks breathtaking, Jimin didn’t play around picking Jungkook’s outfit. Ripped black jeans, chunky boots, a plaid shirt with a leather jacket—he looks hot as hell. Vanessa is a lucky girl, you think bitterly to yourself.

Jungkook greets his friends one by one until he sees Yoongi walk from the kitchen into the living room. Yoongi has refilled his wine glass and stops just in front of Jungkook and bows his head in greeting. You rush to the two boys, joining them in this awkward encounter.

“Oh, I invited Yoongi.” You begin to explain, “You remember Yoongi, right?” you ask Jungkook.

“Of course…” Jungkook tries smiling but it’s tense and strained. At this, Yoongi smirks.

Yoongi steps closer to you and wraps an arm around your shoulder and he smiles at Jungkook.

“I’m y/n’s plus one tonight—or I guess her…date?”

“D-Date?” You and Jungkook both stutter out.

Yoongi brings you in closer, nice and snug against his shoulder as he chuckles.

“Something like that.”

Jungkook tries releasing a breath but finds it to be troublesome. He looks at you with an expression you cannot really decipher, but he doesn’t look all too pleased.

“That’s nice.” He finally says, scratching the back of his neck.

“What’s nice?” It’s a smooth and silky voice. Vanessa. “Happy birthday babe.” She joins your circle next to Jungkook and places a kiss on his cheek.

“Right…” you butt in, “Happy birthday Jungkook.” You smile, still in Yoongi’s arms.

“What do you want to do first?” Vanessa links arms with Jungkook and you feel your body go tense. You don’t want her to touch him.

“Eat.” Jungkook laughs, “I’m so hungry.”

“Well, we have pizza for everyone.” You say loudly, getting the rest of everyone’s attention.

“You say pizza? Hell yeah.” Trina walks towards you four with Holly following behind her.

“Oh hey Trina…” Jungkook says, not entirely too sure how to talk to the girl that hates him.

“Hey Jungkook,” she says quickly with a smile, “So where’s the pizza?”

Jungkook and you share a look of pleasant surprise. Trina? Being nice?

The rest of the boys follow and you all head inside the kitchen to snag a few slices of pizza from the pizzeria that Jungkook is fond of. Vanessa stays close to Jungkook’s side, not that you are surprised. But what is surprising you is that Yoongi has suddenly become slightly more affectionate with you?

Yoongi takes any chance he can get to touch you in some way, whether it be picking a piece of thread off your shirt, or placing a wild strand of hair behind your ear. He doesn’t really strike you as the type to be so openly affectionate…at least not the one to initiate it.

But can picking a piece of thread off your shirt really be counted as affectionate? Maybe he’s just trying to help. What you don’t know though…Jungkook has picked up on too. He has watched as Yoongi smiles at you and you smile back, he has watched as Yoongi subtlety touches your arm when he talks to you and how your hand finds his shoulder when you laugh.

Jungkook sits on his couch, chowing down on a slice of pizza as he glares at you and Yoongi. He doesn’t mean to glare but why is he here? This is a small get together between close friends. How close have you and Yoongi gotten?

“And then bro, I was like no fucking way bro.” Alien bro talks animatedly, his hands motioning all around the place.

Nick stuffs another slice of pizza in his mouth, nodding along to Alien bro’s story.

“That is fucking wild.” You hear Trina pitch in, “Like, did that really happen to you?”

“It may have been a dream, but let me tell you…” Alien bro closes his eyes, “I think it was real, like a memory.”

You internally laugh, because this dude has got some wild fucking stories and you don’t know how to take him seriously. But everyone seems to be enjoying it.

“Let’s do cake!” You hear Jimin yell out, “I have such a sweet tooth right now.”

At this you see Vanessa actually light up, like she has been waiting all night for someone to mention the cake. You two agreed she could present it to Jungkook, maybe that’s why she’s so visibly excited.

“I’ll go get it…” She speaks up, “I’ll be right back.” She says, facing Jungkook. Vanessa stands from her spot next to Jungkook on the couch and heads towards the kitchen.

A few minutes pass by when you hear your name being called. You get up and walk to the kitchen when you see Vanessa with the cake in her hands, the candles already lit up.

“Can you turn off the lights?” she asks, “And you can start the Birthday song.”

You nod your head, walking back into the living room to switch the lights off.

“Okay, ready Jungkook?” you smile at him and he rolls his eyes with a smirk.

“I guess.” He says, amusement laced in his voice.

“Happy birthday to you!” you begin singing, the rest of the gang joins in and the living room is soon being filled with the sound of everyone’s voices singing Jungkook a happy birthday. You pull out your phone and begin recording, Vanessa walks in with the cake and she keeps her face neutral. She doesn’t even sing, wow. You can’t help but kind of laugh, that’s so in character for her.

“Happy birthday dear Juuuungkoook, Happy birthday to you!” You all finish up and start whooping and hollering.

“Make a wish.” Vanessa sets the cake down in front of him and Jungkook nods his head. He takes a deep breath before his eyes find yours. You guys share a brief moment before he’s blowing out his candles.

“What did you wish for?!” Hobi asks, excitement filling the room as everyone agrees that they want to know.

“Secret.” He says, still looking at you.

“Here,” Vanessa nudges a perfectly wrapped box in Jungkook’s hands, “Present.”

“You didn’t have to Vanessa.” Jungkook grins at her but he’s already unwrapping his gift, he throws the wrapping paper to the floor and takes a look at the cologne box.

“This is so expensive!” he whines, “But thank you!” He looks at you for a moment when he awkwardly pecks Vanessas lips in front of everyone.

“My turn!” Jimin shouts, “My turn, my turn!” he stands up and walks by the front door where he left the gift. He picks up the bag and walks back into the living room, standing in front of Jungkook, handing him the bag.

“You’ll love it.” Jimin wiggles his brows at the boy.

Jungkook wiggles his brows back as he opens up the bag and pulls out a black hoodie.

“Fuck yeah.” Jungkook stands up to hug Jimin, “This one is so soft.”

The rest of the gang gives Jungkook a gift one by one until all eyes are on you. Suddenly, you feel super fucking shy and lame that you got matching bracelets.

“Uh, I haven’t gotten anything for you yet…” you lie. “But I will soon, promise.”

Jungkook’s bunny smile begins to fade as he processes your words,

“No worries, y/n.” he smiles again, “You don’t have to get me anything.”

“It’s just a little late, is all.” You shift awkwardly from one foot to another. You wish you weren’t such an idiot. You notice Jimin staring at you from across the room, he looks disappointed.

“What about the bracelets y/n?” Vanessa’s voice can be heard by everyone. She looks at you with a blank expression and you never wanted to strangle someone more.

“What bracelets?” Jungkook’s curiosity showing.

“It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing. They’re friendship bracelets. Such a sweet idea.” Vanessa smiles at you.

“You got me and you friendship bracelets?” Jungkook stands up and walks to you, he extends his right hand out and waits expectantly.

“Thanks Vanessa.” You deadpan.

“No problem.”

“It’s really nothing Jungkook…”

“I want the damn bracelet y/n.”

You stare at him for a moment, his big doe eyes making you feel like you must give in.

“okay, they’re in my bag…” you turn around and search for your purse. You notice Yoongi trying to hand it you and you smile at him gratefully.

“Here.” You hand him his bracelet and he inspects it, rolling it through his fingers.

“Your initial?” Jungkook clenches the bracelet in his fist and looks up at you.

“I fucking love it.” He brings the bracelet to his heart, “I will wear it every day.”

“I have one too…” you pull it from your bag and dangle in around.

“It has a J?” Jungkook bunny smile grows ten times as wide. He takes the bracelet from your fingers and chuckles at the two bracelets.

“I love it.”

“I’m glad you like it—”

“No, love it. I love…” Then he’s clearing his throat, remembering he is in a room full of people.

“Thank you.”

“Oh! There’s one more thing…” you pull out the key chain and you watch as Jungkook’s face lights up. Of course he is more excited about the key chain, you laugh.

“Fucking awesome!” Jungkook takes it from you, “I’ll put it on my keys!”

“That’s the idea,” you chuckle. “Anyway, let’s play games now.”

You and Jungkook stand at the front of the living room, in front of the T.V in battle mode.

“You’re going down Jeon.” You snicker at him, he only rolls his eyes at you as he readies himself.

“I’m just glad I’m not going against Jimin.” Jungkook shoots Jimin a look and Jimin winks.

You two have to chug an entire beer can, trying to beat the other.

“Honestly, same.” You admit, if anyone can down a drink in seconds—it’s Jimin.

Trina stands up and joins your side,

“Okay, are we ready everyone?”

Everyone begins cheering, the sound motivating you and making you feel excited.

“Okay. When I yell…BAM…you start drinking and don’t stop until that can is empty…got it?”

“Yes, we know how to chug a drink, Trina.”

“Damn girl, I was just sayin’.” Trina throws a hand on her hip, “Okay, 3…2…1…BAM!”

You and Jungkook scramble to start drinking, the chilly liquid making its way down your throats. The drink is cold and carbonated and you’re trying to ignore the way it sizzles, instead pretending it’s as smooth as water and you down it back.

“Jungkook is going to win!” Namjoon yells out, he has risen to his feet, the excitement too much.

“No, y/n is! Look how much her head it tilting back!” You hear Jin chime in.

Truth is, you aren’t really sure how much you’ve drank, or how much is left! You’re just wanting it to be over!

“Holy shit, they’re both so close!”

“Broooooooo”

And right as you’re about to finish your drink you hear the sound of a can being crushed right next to you. He won.

“WHAT’S UP…LOSER!” Jungkook shakes his empty, crushed can in your face as you finally finish your own drink.

“Okay, okay. Literally only let you win because it’s your birthday.” You snide playfully.

“Sure y/n, sure.” Jungkook grins down at you, his laughter bounces off the walls and you feel so whole when you hear the sound. He leans forward until his arms are wrapped around you in a quick yet loving hug.

“Whatever you got to say to yourself…loser.” He chuckles out, letting go of you.

“Yeah, yeah. Whatever.” Your pout is so cute, Jungkook thinks.

Yoongi stands up, his gummy smile lighting up the room as he approaches you two. He stands next to you and asks if you’re alright.

“You’ve already had so much to drink, I’m just making sure you can make it back to the sofa.” Yoongi’s shoulders shake as he laughs.

“She can handle herself.” You hear Jungkook say in a somewhat serious tone, “She knows how to drink.” He tries to say a little more lightly.

“But she doesn’t really have to do the penalty, right?” Yoongi asks.

“No, I definitely do.” You laugh out, “Where’s the shot, huh?”

Jungkook gives you a silly looking smirk as he heads towards the kitchen to fetch you that shot. He’s only gone for a moment when you realize he has returned with the liquid of fire.

“For you, princess.”

You roll your eyes at his little nick name he’s given you but you cannot help the blush that creeps on your cheeks…

“Please…please.” You pant, rolling your hips into his as you meet his desperate thrusts.

“Please what, princess?” he breathes out heavily, “Told you that when you’re with—” He begins fucking into you faster, “When you’re with me…to use your words.” His pace is bruising, causing you to choke on the air around you.

The little nick name causing you to remember something you have tied burying.

“I think you should take one too, since it is your birthday after all.” You tease.

“But I’m the winner…” Jungkook pouts, his bottom lip jutting out so far.

“Come on, I bet you won’t.” Jimin pipes in.

“Yeah dude.” You hear Nick say.

“FINE!” Jungkook throws his hands up in defeat, “But you have to go pour it for me.” He says, looking at you.

“Done deal, baby.”

“Pour me one too.” Vanessa walks up to you, her strap on her shoulder sliding down.

“Oh?” you ask, but you nod your head in approval and head towards the kitchen to pour two more shots.

You return with the shots, but feel your stomach drop when you see Jungkook and Vanessa laughing together, her hand laying on his chest, his arm wrapped around her waist.

“Oh!” Jungkook looks at you and smiles, “The shots!”

“Yeah…”

And then Min Yoongi is at your side with his own shot, he looks at you and gives you a sweet smile and eyes full of understanding.

“Let’s take them.” He says. His hand going to yours, he squeezes it tight and you feel yourself trying to breathe.

“Here you go.” You hand the two shots to Jungkook and Vanessa, they take them and you four look at one another before raising your glasses.

“Happy birthday, Jungkook.” You whisper, taking the shot.

Hours pass, and things are starting to wind down, you think. Jin, Namjoon and Hobi are at the front door saying their goodbyes and you feel your time is coming soon too.

“Us too.” Trina says, “Our uber is almost here.” Her and Holly gather their things and make their way out the door.

“Jimin, you coming with us?” Trina asks.

“Um, what about you y/n?” Jimin makes it to your side, his hand going to rub your shoulder.

“You guys go without me, I’m going to help clean up. Hostess duties!” You salute towards your friends and they giggle.

“Okay babe, I’ll see you soon?” Jimin goes in for a tight hug and you hug him back even tighter.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll help you clean up.” Yoongi offers, but you shake your head.

“No, I couldn’t ask that. Me and Vanessa got it. You go home too, it’s so late. I will come by to see you soon though.”

“Are you sure?” Yoongi asks as he catches Jungkook watching you two. “Well, if you insist y/n.” he inches towards you and to your surprise, you feel his lips leave a small kiss on your cheek. Yoongi smirks when he sees Jungkook react. Jungkook glares at the boy and Yoongi feels like hopefully he helped enough tonight.

“What was that for?” you feel yourself turn red.

“Nothing.” He whispers before he’s turning around and walking out of the door.

You are left here shocked and confused but you cannot help but smile at Yoongi’s small gesture. He really is too sweet.

“Well,” you turn around to face Jungkook and Vanessa, “Let’s clean up,” you say to Vanessa, “And then I’ll get out of your hair.”

“Actually,” Vanessa curls her lips upwards, “I am feeling quite tired.” Her eyes find yours, “So maybe Jungkook can help you clean up.”

“You’re going home already?” Jungkook looks confused. He was probably expecting birthday sex or some shit.

“Mhm.” She breathes out easily, “See you later babe.” She leans over and pecks his cheek, you immediately twist your head to look away. Vanessa notices and she fucking smiles that sly ass smile. “See you later, y/n.”

And with that she is out of the apartment, leaving just you and Jungkook and Nick and Alien Bro.

“We will be out on the balcony smoking, if you guys want to join.” Nick offers to you, but you’re shaking your head no.

“Nah, you guys enjoy.” Jungkook says. Nick and Alien bro (You really got to learn this dudes name) are opening the back door and leaving you guys for the balcony.

“And then there was two.” Jungkook jokes, he chews on his lips as he watches you begin the cleaning up process. You get a large black trash bag and start throwing away the empty beer bottles and other trash around the living room and kitchen.

“Help me clean, birthday boy.”

Jungkook grins at you and starts helping, he’s gathering the shot glasses and setting them in the kitchen sink. You two work like this for around 10-15 minutes when the place is finally looking like his apartment again.

“Well, I guess that’s it.” You set the last trash bag in the kitchen, “You and Nick can take these out later, right?” “Yes, y/n. You did enough, I swear.” Jungkook smiles at you. “Hey, where’s your bracelet?” he dangles his wrist around, showing you his.

“Oh…” You dig around in your pockets until you finally find the piece of jewelry.

“Let me.” Jungkook stands closer to you, reaching his hand out, expecting you to hand over the bracelet. You place it in his hand and he grabs your wrist and clips the bracelet on.

“There.” He breathes out, “Never take it off.” He half jokes.

“You really like it?”

“I really love it.” Jungkook pulls you in for a hug, but he’s letting go much faster than you would like.

“Wanna chill for a bit?” He asks you, his hands still on your arms from your hug that you just shared.

“For a bit, sure.”

You two walk to the living room sofa and plop down, the long day finally catching up to you. It’s around 1 am now, you’ve been running around all day.

“So…” Jungkook looks at you with an unreadable expression, “What’s going on with you and this Yoongi guy?”

“What do you mean?”

“Was tonight like, a date for you two?”

“What? No?”

“Really? Could of fooled me and like, everyone else.”

“He was just joking…I think.” You groan into your hands, and laugh. “Why?”

“I was just wondering.” He turns to face forward, his face hardening as he thinks. “Is he going to be like, your boyfriend?”

“What?!” you choke on your spit, “Yoongi is my friend.”

“Does he know that?” Jungkook continues to look forward, “He was all over you.”

“He definitely was not all over me. Oh my god. What are you getting so crazy for?”

Crazy. That’s the word you use, but he knows you mean jealous. Jungkook sits here, biting on his bottom lip. He has to admit, he doesn’t like this ‘crazy’ feeling. He feels like he’s suffocating just remembering you with Yoongi tonight. He has no right to feel crazy or jealous. He has a girlfriend for fucks sake!

“I just hope he’s treating you right.”

“He’s just a friend Jungkook. But you know what? And if he was trying to date me?”

Jungkook feels his chest tighten, not liking the idea already.

“Then like I said, I hope he’s treating you right.” He says more softly, turning to look at you again.

“Did you enjoy your birthday?”

“It was nice, thank you.”

“What’s your favorite birthday in your life so far?”

Jungkook tilts his head as he thinks, rocking it side to side. He folds his arms behind his head and lets out a long breath.

“There’s two I can think of.” He says, “When I was 10 all I wanted to do was see one of those drive thru zoo things. But I wasn’t expecting much because I guess birthdays and holidays were stressful for my parents…” he takes a deep breath, “they always fought so much and so I didn’t think we would be doing anything for my birthday at all. But they for once, they got along this day. They took me to the zoo and I just remember being so on edge like something may go wrong…but it never did, it was a perfect day.”

“I bet 10 year old Jungkook was so cute.”

“I was the cutest!”

“And what’s the second?”

“Sophomore year of college.” He states quickly making you choke on air. Really? That birthday of all birthdays?

“Jungkook, there has to be a better one than that…” you begin, “We literally didn’t even do anything.”

It seemed everyone happened to become busy the day of Jungkook’s birthday, everyone except you. You and Jungkook spent the day just the two of you in his dorm room watching movies and playing video games. You didn’t even buy him a present, much too broke!

“That day meant a lot to me.” Jungkook explains, “You didn’t leave my side, no matter what.”

“Well, you were my best friend.”

“And now?” Jungkook turns his head to face you, “Am I your best friend now?”

“Jungkook…” you caress his thigh, “Of course.”

Jungkook throws his head back as he smiles that bunny smile and you can’t help but giggle.

“Were you worried?”

“So worried.” He continues to laugh, “You’re my best friend too.”

~~~~~

October

“I don’t know guys!” you whine, bringing the cup of coffee in for a sip. “Marketing…can someone even be passionate about that?”

“What did I say y/n? You’re so concerned if you’re passionate or not, why don’t you start off small—finding something you just like.” Yoongi offers his piece of advice but you groan.

“What do you think Tae?” you point your head in his direction, “Wait, I am asking one of the most passionate people I know.” You complain.

“I agree with Yoongi, y/n.” Taehyung says, he drinks his water in gulps.

“Of course, who wouldn’t agree with Yoongi?” You hit your head on the table a few times.

You three are seated in Yoongi’s record shop in the cozy corner of the store, discussing the burden of dreams.

“I mean, guys.” You begin, “I don’t want to be making cookies forever.”

“But I really like them.” Yoongi whispers.

“Me too,” Taehyung says as he shoves a sugar cookie down his throat. “So good.”

“Guys, you aren’t helping.”

“Honestly y/n…” Yoongi stands from his seat to get some more coffee, “Stop trying to force a dream to happen. It will come to you naturally, just trust in that.”

“You make it sound so easy.” You hand Taehyung another cookie and he takes it with a grin.

“So y/n…” Taehyung swallows down the last bits of the cookie before he’s turning to face you in his chair, “How was Jungkook’s birthday, I forgot to ask.”

“It went really well actually.”

“Why do you say ‘actually’?” Taehyung laughs, “Were you expecting it to go bad?”

“It’s not that…I don’t know. Maybe.”

“Is it because of Vanessa?” Yoongi comes back with two fresh coffees.

“Maybe.”

“That’s his girlfriend, right? I just don’t get it. Should we come up with an evil plan to break them up?” Taehyung snickers.

“Tae, chill.” You giggle.

“I’m joking but I am also totally serious.” He comments. “Anyway guys, I gotta head back to the museum. But same time next week?”

“You know it.” You blow on your hot coffee, waving him goodbye.

The last few weeks the three of you meet up for coffee (Tae usually brings his own drink of choice, says coffee is too bitter for him) and chit chat just like now. It’s an interesting group but you feel comfortable. After time has passed, forgiving and moving on from Taehyung’s crushing you has gotten easier and now you even find his friendship to be quite valuable. You guess they weren’t kidding when they say time heals all wounds.

“Are you two ever going to tell me what happened between you? You were so tense when he first started hanging out.” Yoongi says, observant as usual.

“I will. But another day,” you smile.

“No rush.” Yoongi drinks his coffee slowly, “Whenever you’re ready.”

“By the way, did it work?” Yoongi asks between sips.

You can’t help but raise your brows in question,

“Did what work?”

“Did Jungkook say anything? About being jealous?” He gives you a smirk.

“What are you talk—wait, were you purposely trying to be affectionate with me to see if Jungkook would get a rise out of it?” You ask, completely shocked. That seems almost out of character for Yoongi!

“I tried. I’m a little awkward being the first to show affection, “ he admits, “But for you, my friend, I was willing to try.” He gives you a shy smile and you feel your heart race.

“Yoongi—”

“You really don’t even have to answer because I know the truth. I could see it on his face, but I was curious if he said anything to you.”

You think back to Jungkook’s birthday and well…he technically did say something to you. He was being a little crazy (jealous) but you cannot understand why. Jungkook is your friend and not to mention he has a girlfriend.

“Sorry to disappoint Yoongs, but he did not.” You decide to say.

“Did you know you avoid all eye contact when you want to lie.” Yoongi takes another sip of his coffee, his sly smile telling you he knows the truth.

“Jeez, why do you pick up on things so quickly?!” you groan, “I can’t even tell one little nothing lie in front of you.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t try to lie to me then.” He laughs. “So what did he say?”

“He just—I don’t know. He just…wanted to know what was up with you basically.”

Yoongi opens his mouth to say ‘Ah’ and then continues to drink his coffee.

“He’s not going to be rude to you or anything!” you quickly say, “he’s just a little protective over me, is all.”

“Oh? That’s all?” Yoongi teases.

“Hey…” you set your cup down and fold your hands in your lap, “What makes you think Jungkook feels the same way?”

Yoongi breathes out slowly, his fingers tapping against his mug when he looks up at you and smiles.

“There’s an obvious tension between you two, “ he starts, “The way he looks at you. That honestly gave everything away. His eyes always find you, no matter what.” Yoongi quietly chuckles, “The way he’s threatened by me. He doesn’t even try to hide it.” Yoongi thinks for a moment, “And…you two, the way you are together…god, it’s like watching two people who are in a relationship but don’t know they’re in a relationship.”

“What—what do you mean by that?” you pry further. Curious about your own dynamic with Jungkook that maybe even you can’t see.

“I don’t know like, you guys act like boyfriend and girlfriend already!” he laughs, “That’s when I knew I didn’t stand a chance.”

“Yoongi…”

“It’s okay,” his gummy smile lights up his whole face, “being your friend has been so much more rewarding.”

You feel yourself smile at his words…although, you do feel bad. But keeping a friend like Yoongi around has been amazing. And maybe if you weren’t already in love with someone else…no, you shouldn’t even think that, that’s not fair.

“Thanks Yoongs.”

~~~~~~

“We need to talk.”

Jimin is shoving his way through Jungkook’s front door, his hair pushed back in frustration like his fingers have been running through it for hours.

“Jesus man, it’s like 8 in the fucking morning.” Jungkook’s low, groggy voice booms from his chest.

“This couldn’t wait. I have to be at work at 9 and I’ve been up all night with the same one thing on my mind.” Jimin takes off his shoes and makes his way to the couch.

“And what’s that?” Jungkook asks, clearly annoyed.

“You need to tell y/n how you feel.” Jimin decides to go with the straight forward approach, he does not have the time to beat around the bush today.

Jungkook closes the door and swings around to face Jimin,

“Huh?”

“Listen man, I’ve been racking my brain about it all fucking night. It’s got to be you. You have to do it, she won’t.”

“Why the fuck would I do that?”

“Grow the fucking balls, man!” Jimin sits back on the sofa, his head falling into the cushion.

“Look dude, I don’t know what you—”

“You’re in love with her, you have been since freshmen year. You guys fucked, I know. She didn’t talk to you for however long, I know that too. But come on man, it’s so clear how you both feel.”

Jungkook continues to stand here, not knowing what to say. Where is all this coming from?

“I have a girlfriend, Jimin.”

“Oh please, give me a fucking break.” Jimin stands up, walking towards Jungkook. “There is almost zero chemistry between you two. Like emotional chemistry…I don’t know what your sex life is like…” Jimin holds up a hand, “And I don’t want to know.”

“Wasn’t going to tell you anyway,” Jungkook pouts. “Listen, how can you be so sure y/n would even feel the same way?”

“Can’t you just fucking trust me?” Jimin yells out, exasperated.

“Did she say the words Jimin?” Jungkook becomes very serious, making Jimin shudder. “Did she tell you she has feelings for me?” his dark eyes pierce into Jimin’s.

Jimin looks down at the ground, feeling defeated.

“You know I can’t tell you that.” Jimin finally says, “You just have to have the courage man. Are you really going to go your whole life not telling her? Why torture yourself like that?”

Jungkook stands here feeling so lost, and fucking emotional. Like, he could god damn cry about it.

“Because,” Jungkook sniffles into his sleeve. “It’s guaranteed she would be in my life. I can’t risk losing her. I couldn’t handle that man…” Jungkook begins to choke up.

Jimin walks closer to Jungkook and pulls him in for a tight hug, Jungkook keeps his arms to his side.

“I know. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” Jimin whispers.

“I think though…that there will be a moment where you finally have the courage…”

“I don’t know.”

“You will, Jungkook. When the timing is right…but I don’t know when that is for you two.”

“I really do love her…” Jungkook allows a few tears to slip from his closed eyes into Jimin’s shoulder. “I’m so frustrated like, all the time.” He admits, “Seeing her, talking to her, I just want to tell her how I feel. I hate how hard I have to try just to stay in the zone of friendship. But you don’t understand the risk…” Jungkook leans back, pulling away from Jimin. “If she doesn’t feel the same, I could lose her.” His puffy eyes avoid Jimin. “Can I handle a loss like that again?”

“But she…” Jimin has to bite his tongue…seeing his two best friends like this hurts his heart beyond belief.

“Yeah, I understand.” Jimin decides to say, “But I think you might be surprised.”

Jungkook pulls his brows together, his face scrunching up and he scoffs.

“Maybe, but maybe not.”

“I’m sorry to bring this all on you so early in the morning…I’ve just been so worried about you two…” Jimin starts to put his shoes back on.

“Maybe you could stay until you really need to leave for work? You still go like 45 minutes, right?” Jungkook practically begs with sad, soft eyes.

“Sure.” Jimin takes his shoes back off and grabs a hold of Jungkook’s shoulder, “Let’s sit down for a while.”

The two boys head to the couch and take a seat, leaving little space between them. Jungkook needs the presence of another human being right now, he needs to feel real live warmth. Jimin wishes he could mend Jungkook’s cracked heart but he knows only you can do that. But Jimin can try his best. The two sit in comfortable silence, the only sound that can be heard is Jungkook’s light sniffling and Jimin humming a soft tune.

“It’s almost 9.” Jimin mentions regretfully.

“I know. Thanks for staying for a bit.”

“Of course.” Jimin rises from the couch, “You guys are my best friends but you two sure are fucking idiots.” He smiles and makes his way to leave.

~~~~~~

Bored. So fucking bored. Trina and Holly went out for dinner tonight and you were not invited! You kind of wonder what’s going on between them…but that’s a thought for another day, right now you are so fucking bored.

It’s Friday night and you don’t know what to do with yourself. Jimin has some party he’s going to tonight but you didn’t really feel like going so you rejected his invitation, Jin and the guy’s invited you over for a cookout but you said no because you didn’t feel like driving all the way to Jin’s place—you know, lazy.

And you haven’t heard from Jungkook all day so he’s probably tired from work or worse—with Vanessa. But would it hurt to try? To see what he’s up to?

y/n 9:04pm

hi

Jungkook 9:10pm

Hi

y/n 9:12pm

Whatcha up to tonight?

Jungkook 9:13pm

Nothing really, you?

y/n 9:13pm

nothing either…

y/n 9:13pm

Wanna have a movie night with some wine?

Jungkook 9:20pm

Sure:)

Jungkook 9:23pm

Lemme guess, I have to bring the wine

y/n 9:23pm

Bingo!

Jungkook 9:50pm

I’m almost there

Not even 5 minutes later you hear your door being knocked on, and you yell a ‘come in’. Jungkook pushes the door open and finds you sitting on the couch wrapped up in your favorite blanket. He shuts the door behind him, and walks to the kitchen for some wine glasses. You two only nod at one another in greeting, getting comfortable in each others presence.

“I brought 2 bottles,” Jungkook says, “One for you, one for me.”

“Wow, you’re so smart.” You smile up at him and his heart clenches in his chest. Your smile is so special, it’s so soft and so fucking pretty he almost cannot handle it.

“Y-Yeah.” He sets the glasses down on the table that sits in front of the sofa. “What movie do you have in mind?”

“You can choose.”

“Iron Man?” “No, not that.”

“Fine.” He pouts, “Let’s find something new on Netflix.”

An hour into some random drama, you find yourself getting sleepy.

“Wakey wakey.” You feel Jungkook’s breath on your ear, you open your eyes a little wider to prove your consciousness.

“I am awake…hey,” you suddenly get an idea, “Remember a little while ago you said you felt like our friendship kind of started over?”

“Hm? Yeah?”

“Would if we do?”

“I don’t get it?” Jungkook asks clearly confused.

“Let’s play a game! Of getting to know each other better. Everything out on the table.” You say with a pleased smile, obviously loving your own idea.

“hmmmmm…” Jungkook wraps his blanket closer around his body, “Sure.”

“Yay! I’ll pull out a list of questions from the internet.” You get your phone and google a list of questions. “You ready?” you say with a wink.

“I guess so.” He playfully shrugs his shoulders and shows you a small smile.

“Okay one…What’s your favorite way to spend a day off?”

“hmm…sleeping in, working out, playing video games, making videos, sleeping some more, hanging out with you.”

“Wow, honored.” You tease. “For me, it’s sleeping all day.”

“That’s it? That’s your whole answer?” Jungkook giggles.

“What type of music are into to?”

“y/n…” Jungkook whines, “You already know these answers…”

“We’re pretending we don’t!”

“Fine, I like almost all genres but I really prefer ballads.”

“I like music with meaningful lyrics,” you say.

“I agree.” Jungkook grins at you.

“Next…Do you have a favorite holiday. Why or why not?”

Jungkook nibbles on his lips as he thinks…is he honest?

“I use to hate holidays.” He admits softly, slightly slurring thanks to the wine, “But now it’s Christmas and New Year’s. And why? Both reasons are because of you.”

You feel your cheeks become warmer and probably pinker.

“Mine too.” You say quickly, “Next,” you are in a rush to change the subject. “Do you want a family of your own?”

“One day, yes. With the right person…”

“I’m the same.” You scroll through the questions, “If you had only one sense…hearing, touch, sight, etc, which would you want?”

“Touch. Imagine not being able to feel things?” Jungkook asks, he thinks about not being able to feel the soft touch of sheets on a bed, the feel of your hair between his fingers, your skin, your lips—wait, he needs to chill. “Yeah, touch.”

“Really? I would choose sight.” You say, “Who do you admire most in this world?”

“Mom.” Jungkook whispers, “She was so strong, she went through so much yet still found the strength to love me.”

“You.” Your hand finds Jungkook’s, you hold on to him softly, “My answer is you.”

“y/n…” Jungkook leans into your side, “Thank you.”

You clear you throat and continue scrolling through your phone, looking for the next question.

“If you found out today is your last day on Earth, what would you do?”

“Exactly what I’m doing right now.”

“Honestly? Me too.” You whisper, you feel your heart beginning to race as you and Jungkook admit that if it were your last day, you would spend it together. Somehow the thought almost seems romantic to you…that’s obviously your imagination but you can dream.

“What’s the last thing you do at night?”

Jungkook wiggles his brows at you and you hit his arm, laughing.

“Gross.” You giggle. “Something besides that.”

“What? You think it’s gross to mast—”

“Don’t!” you yell out laughing. “Don’t be gross.”

“Everyone does it y/n…I bet even you.” Jungkook voice goes low. “in fact, I have a question for you.” Jungkook scoots closer to you, “When was the last time you got yourself off?” your eyes go wide, “It’s not like you’re seeing anyone…unless you and Yoon—”

“No!” You begin to panic, “I’m not seeing anyone, you’re right.”

Jungkook releases a long breath and he smiles, “Thought so.” Then he’s scooting even closer to you.

“How do you touch yourself y/n?” He slurs out, “With your fingers only? Perhaps you use a vibrator?”

You push your head back in shock, there’s no way in hell Jungkook just asked you that? Is he drunk? Barely.

“Why do you want to know that?” you scoot a little closer to him too.

“Best friends know this type of stuff about each other all the time, don’t they?”

“Not really…but I’ll play. I use both.”

Jungkook raises a brow in amusement, he bites on his bottom lip as his smirks at you.

“You own a vibrator?” Jungkook chuckles darkly, “How come I didn’t know?”

“Why would I tell you that?”

“I bet Jimin knows.”

“Fine, he does.”

Jungkook narrows his eyes at you as he tries to hold in his slight laughter, his hand comes to his mouth and he chuckles into it.

“Thought so…when’s the last time you used it?”

“Last night before bed.”

“So, it’s the last thing you did at night?” Jungkook points his finger at you knowingly and you can’t help but laugh.

“Okay, I see where this is going. Fine, I get. We all masturbate. It’s completely normal and not gross and a totally valid answer for something you do before bed.” You throw your hands up as you giggle.

“Thank you.” Jungkook knees touch yours as he scoots just an inch closer, “But I wasn’t trying to make a point, I was genuinely curious about you.” He admits in a deep voice and you squeeze your thighs together, an action that does not go unnoticed by him. His eyes land to your lap and he chuckles. His voice is so low and inviting as he speaks, “Are you curious about me too?”

“What do you mean?”

“About when’s the last time I—”

“Fine, when’s the last time?” you ask lightly.

“Right before I came here.” He admits easily.

“Interesting.”

You and Jungkook stare at one another for what feels like at least an hour but in reality probably seconds. But his dark gaze is so raw and powerful, you find yourself leaning into his space.

“The last time I used my vibrator was yes, last night. But the last time I touched myself was tonight. Before you arrived.”

Jungkook nods his head in understanding, or maybe it’s approval? Either way he nods his head as a sly smile creeps on his lips.

“Can I ask you what you thought about?” Even Jungkook widens his eyes in surprise as he asks that. Where did that confidence come from? “Sorry that’s TMI.” He quickly rushes to say, not wanting to really hear your answer because he shouldn’t know what you fantasize about especially if he’s not in said fantasies.

You lean your head back and snicker. You wish you had the fucking courage to tell him the truth. Him. You thought about him.

In your fantasy his head was between your legs, licking you up and making you squirm. He would moan into your greedy cunt, basking in your juices. God, you can just picture it now. His mouth and nose covered in you, the shine on his face evidence of how well he’s eaten you. His fingers still buried inside you as he lifts his head up to smirk down at you, his hair a fucking mess from how much you have tugged on it.

You’d be lying if you said you weren’t thinking about it right now and getting so heavily turned on. Your chest heaves just a little more than usual, and there’s an ache between your legs that you wish Jungkook would soothe. Your fantasy of him going down on you? You took that straight from your memories.

“Not going to say anything?” Jungkook leans in a little closer.

“Sorry, just thinking.”

“About…?”

“You.”

Jungkook’s eyes expand as he processes what you just say until—

“Wait, wait. That came out wrong.” Your hands scramble to hold on to his shoulders. “I mean, I was thinking about you. But not like that.” You lie. Because you have to lie.

“Oh…right, that makes sense.” Jungkook visibly deflates at your confession.

“Anyway, yeah. That’s a TMI for sure.” You laugh awkwardly and Jungkook leans back away from you.

“For sure.” Jungkook leans back on the sofa, “So, what’s the next question?”

“Ever had a threesome?” you ask from your own brain.

“You already know I have.”

“With two girls or with another guy…?”

“Two girls.”

“Would you ever with another guy?”

“Maybe if it’s with a girl that doesn’t mean something to me…but if it’s with someone I care about, probably not. I think I may be too possessive. Don’t wanna share.”

“Ah, I see.”

“What about you?”

“I would do both.” You admit. “Sounds like fun…”

“It is fun,” Jungkook laughs, “But there’s something special about just being with one person, if it’s special…”

“Have you ever had sex with someone special?”

“Yes.”

Oh. Jungkook’s never been in a serious relationship since you’ve known him so you weren’t expecting him to answer that with a yes…but he is with Vanessa now. So obviously…

“I see.”

“What’s the next question?”

“I’m looking up a new list. It’s kind of sexy, is that okay?”

“A list of dirty questions? I’m down.” Jungkook smirks and you feel the heat between your legs grow.

“Okay the first one is asking if you’re a virgin and I think the whole town knows the answer to that…”

“Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?!”

You laugh out, “Nothing, nothing.” Then continue scrolling, “Okay, opinion on shower sex?”

“Hmm, I’ve done, and I will do it again.”

“For me, it’s a little uncomfortable but I’ll do it,” you say, “boob or butt guy?”

“Fuck. Both of them, can I say both?” Jungkook pleads and you giggle.

“Sure, both.” Your eyes light up when you find the next question. “Oooh. What is your most embarrassing sex story?”

“Oh god…okay. When I was in high school I was getting head from this girl…”

“Uh huh…and then?”

“We got caught by our teacher and that’s a total mood killer right?”

“Right?”

“Well, when the teacher was scolding me I popped another boner. And I was wearing sweats so it was super obvious and she was trying so hard not to make it obvious. But I don’t know, my body betrayed me.”

“You got hard from getting scolded?”

“Apparently.”

You burst out into giggles, the story absolutely killing you. Who does that? Who pops a boner from getting scolded…by their fucking teacher?

“Your turn, your turn.”

“Okay…one time I was giving head…”

“Uh huh…and then?” he copies you.

“And I guess I swallowed his cum too fast because it shot out of my nose like milk.”

“What the fuck y/n.” Jungkook laughs out hysterically. “That’s so awesome.”

“It wasn’t awesome Jungkook, it was embarrassing.”

“Perspective.”

“In what world is someone’s perspective on this awesome?” “Mine.”

“Well, you’re fucking weird.

“Maybe so.” Jungkook continues to laugh, “What’s next?”

“Do you prefer to give or receive?”

“Who doesn’t love to receive? That’s obvious. But me? I am a giver, 100%”

And he’s right. Hence why you’re able to use the memory of him going down on you as good masturbation material.

“I see.”

“I think I am a giver too.” You look down at your phone, “But who doesn’t love to receive?”

“You do give nicely.” Jungkook whispers, “Anyway what’s the next one?”

“Do you like sexting?”

“Fucking love it. I love the dirty words and pictures.” He admits.

“Yeah, me too.”

What would it be like to be texting Jungkook throughout the work day, sending one another your dirtiest fantasies and pictures to go along with it.

“I’ll read the next one now…If I came home from work stressed, how you do you relax me?” your eyes go wide when you realize, “Wait, pretends it’s asking about someone else. So a girl you’re with comes home from work stressed, how do you relax her?”

Jungkook is quiet for a few moments, he chews on his bottom lip and breathes out heavily.

“How would I relax you? I mean, some girl?”

“Y-Yes.”

“First, I would kiss you breathless.”

“You mean her.”

“Right. I would kiss her lips over and over, taking off one article of clothing at a time, sit her down on the couch while I make my way into the kitchen…pour her a glass of her favorite wine and hand it to her. Then I would kiss down her body, telling her sweet words. How much I love her, how much I missed her today, how much she means to me. I will kiss down until I am taking off her pants along with her underwear…” “And then?” you breathe out.

“Kiss her sweet, soft skin…taste her. Taste how fucking good she tastes. Eat her out while she sips on her wine…”

“Oh nice.” You laugh a little.

“Make her come all over my tongue, getting her drunk on her orgasm.”

“And her wine.” You point out.

“Yes, both. After she comes, I will kiss back up her body and hold her.” Jungkook releases short breath after the other. “Make her feel wanted.”

“That does sound relaxing…”

“You like?”

“Yes.”

“Then maybe—”

“Next question is ‘What turns you on almost instantly?”

“Dirty talk.”

“I see.”

“What—”

“You have to answer too, remember?”

“My stomach being touched.” You admit. “How do you feel about toys?”

“Not against them, could be fun to try out.”

“I agree…how do you feel about blindfolds?”

“You answer first.” Jungkook says shyly.

“I’m into it.”

“Being blinded? Or blinding someone?”

“Both? Yes, both.”

“Fuck, me too.” He folds his arms behind him as he leans back further into the sofa.

“Both for you too?”

“Yes. It would be boring if I was only into one thing right?”

You laugh, “Yes, I think we think similarly.”

“Interesting.”

“Very.” You smile at him and he smirks, “Would you like to watch me touch myself?”

“Yes—”

“—Wait, like your partner, not me.” You both say at the same time.

“Oh, well yes.” Jungkook says again. “Watching your fingers travel down to your pussy, rubbing your clit…well, not you but you get my point.” He says, his breathing becoming heavy again.

“Oh. I would also like to watch you.”

“But not me.”

“Exactly.”

“Spit or swallow?”

“I like a girl who swallows.”

“I like to swallow most times and if I don’t swallow it’s because I’m letting the guy come on my face or my tits or—”

“God damn it, y/n.” Jungkook breathes out erratically. His hand goes to his crotch as he tries to hide his growing member.

“Rough or sensual?”

“Fuck. Both, definitely both.”

“I agree. Why not both all the time?” you squeeze your thighs together again as you watch Jungkook shift uncomfortably in his seat on the couch.

“Would you let me pleasure you as you drive? I mean, your partner. Sorry it’s just the way the questions read…”

“Yes. I would.”

“Seems a bit unsafe…but I would give it a try.” You say, “Do you like your hair to be pulled?” you ask with a smirk, already knowing the answer.

“Fucking love it.” He admits between heavy breaths, “But I like to pull hair too.” He winks.

“I do too, but I prefer being the one pulling.” You wink back. “Are you quiet during sex?”

“I—I don’t know…Am I?” Jungkook looks into your eyes, and you blank. Is he actually referring to the time you two had sex? Without him getting weird? “You aren’t the quietest.” You admit, “But it’s so fucking hot.”

“Well, you definitely aren’t quiet.” He says, “Can barely touch you and you’re already whimpering out.”

“Depends who the guy is.”

“Well, when it’s with me…sorry, I shouldn’t bring that up.”

“Right…” your fingers find their way into Jungkook’s hair, “But why not?”

“y/n…” he warns and you chuckle.

“What?” you decide to play innocent. “It was so long ago, Jungkook. We should be able to talk about it by now.”

But Jungkook can’t. Because although it’s almost been 4 years, it’s still so fresh for him. Not just the feeling of being inside you but the emotional shit he was feeling too.

“I’ll tell you one thing and one thing only about that night,” Jungkook decides to say, his hand goes to yours and gently places it back in your lap. “It felt so fucking good.” He whispers out and you feel all the heat in your body rush to your aching pussy.

“Oh.” You breathe out erratically. “I guess, I would have to agree.”

“Should we sleep soon?” Jungkook leans back as he asks you this.

“Don’t you want me to share one thing about that night?”

“…Sure.”

“You…felt so…good…inside me…” you say between deep breaths.

“You felt even better, y/n.”

It’s Saturday morning, and you find yourself waking up on the couch, a big blanket draped around your body and you can’t help but snuggle into it, not wanting to get up quite yet.

On the other side of the couch is a still sleeping Jungkook, his light snores filling your ears. You two didn’t even finish your wine last night, so you are waking up hang over free. The sun is shining today, it’s rays peeking through your window blinds and you want to throw the blanket over your head to hide yourself from the brightness but you decide to actually wake up and get up instead.

You throw the blanket off your body and on to Jungkook, who gratefully takes it and cuddles deeper into the covers. You stand up and head towards the bathroom to wash up, turning on a hot shower.

You wonder what you’ll be up to today, will you stay in? Go out? Hang with the girls? By the way, did they ever come home last night? You stop by Holly’s room to find it empty. Interesting, you guess they went to Trina’s.

The shower is ready for you so you slip in and let the warm water cascade over your tired body. You shampoo, condition and wash your body, when you hear insistent knowing on the bathroom door.

“y/n!!! I gotta pee!!” Jungkook’s worried voice is heard over the running water, “That’s it, I’m coming in okay?!”

And before you can respond, you hear the door being swung open and Jungkook lifting the toilet seat lid up and releasing himself. You fucking laugh. He literally says ‘Aaahhh’ for the same amount of time he is peeing.

“Fucking finally, I thought I was going to piss myself.” He says when he’s finishing up.

“Sorry.” You reply lamely. “Shower felt too good to leave.”

“Well, hurry up so we can go get something to eat. I’m so hungry!”

“Okay, okay.” And with that, Jungkook is leaving the bathroom, shutting the door behind him.

You finish washing up, stepping out of the shower and drying off. You quickly leave the bathroom in just your towel to head to your bedroom. Thankfully, Jungkook is on the couch watching some show on Netflix—too busy to notice your half naked state.

You get dressed in a rush, not wanting Jungkook to wait much longer for you. You settle for some jeans and a cute yellow shirt.

“I like yellow on you.” Jungkook says when he sees you. “Pretty.”

You are sure your cheeks are turning a nice shade of red at his compliment but you cover them with your hands to hide yourself.

“Thanks JK.”