#and especially when she's in a relationship with nate who WAS a father like

[agirlinthegalaxy]

It's been rolling around in my brain the last few days for some reason, but I still hate the family backstory reveals for Sophie and Eliot. I've seen some of the meta for it, but quite frankly, it still makes no sense. If it had been something actually thought of and intentional in the original, I think it could have been so fascinating. I mean, Sophie's willing abandonment of Astrid to contrast with Nate's loss of Sam or Eliot's adoption in contrast with Hardison's and Parker's? Could have been excellent! But they came out of nowhere in Redemption and don't work with these characters.

Sophie was still actively using the fucking alias that she met Astrid under! She met with someone from her past on the show! Like. Quite frankly, that one is unequivocally bullshit that they made up and threw in and pretended could fit with the established canon. (And I'm sorry, but the idea of Sophie abandoning Astrid and never telling Nate about her just... So much of Nate's trauma was rooted in the loss of Sam, and I think that introducing this element after he's gone and unable to respond to it taints Sophie and Nate's relationship in a way bc I'm not exactly sure how Nate would've responded to learning about this but I think that it's something he'd have needed to know. I don't know how to fully express my thoughts on that but yeah.)

As for Eliot, I don't like the adoption aspect literally at all. The way that he would interact with his family and the memory of his family would be different, and I think that it's flat out ridiculous to think that he'd have never mentioned it to the team in the original show, especially when dealing with the kid cases. (I also dislike the biracial adoption as its own element because if Eliot was actually raised by Black parents in the... idk what 80s/90s? That just. doesn't feel congruent with how they write Eliot interacting with PoC, not necessarily in a bad way, but babe, he's written like a white southern man raised in a specific kind of culture that does not jell with that. It also makes Eliot look... really bad that he was apparently raised with the knowledge of how fucked up the military was and his parents' history and made the choices that he did.) Like the show may not have explicitly stated it but the implication of that relationship was vastly fucking different throughout the original show.

Just. These were not backstories that were congruent with their depiction and characters in the original show, and they're also just moves that I don't particularly like or find interesting directions for those characters. There's also something to be said about how it was apparently unacceptable for a woman to not have kids or someone not reconciling with their biological family when that was something that the original show handled a lot better. Out of all the directions to take Sophie and Eliot's stories, that's just not really one that I think was a good idea.

[bumblesimagines]

“ please, whatever you do... don't fall in love with me. “

“ we need to set some ground rules. “

“ we're keeping this to ourselves, right? “

- Cassie howard

“ please, whatever you do... don't fall in love with me. “

“ we need to set some ground rules. “

“ we're keeping this to ourselves, right? “ (changed right to remember)

pronouns: he/him/his, m!reader

You couldn't pinpoint exactly when it had all started with Cassie Howard. One minute she'd merely been a friend of a friend and the next minute you found yourself sneaking around with her. You supposed it was inevitable considering you were often forced to spend time together due to your brother and her best friend's relationship. And that reason was precisely why sneaking around was necessary.

However, the blonde believed otherwise.

"(Y/N), you have a guest!" Your mother's voice echoed through the house, pulling your attention away from the notebook on your lap. Your brows furrowed and you set the notebook aside, double-checking your phone for any messages as you stepped out of your bedroom and approached the staircase. Upon spotting Aaron gazing down toward the front door with the same look he gave girls who'd never even glance at him twice, your stomach twisted. You tucked your phone away in your pocket and descended the stairs, nearly groaning at the sight of Nate leaning against the wall by the stairs while your mother and Cassie chatted.

"What's going on here?" Nate questioned, sounding far too much like your father. He held a smirk on his face, cruel and challenging as always, while his dark eyes remained on Cassie. While she may have been his ex-girlfriend's closest friend, Nate's favorite subject was talking shit about her and showing her pictures and videos to anyone who hadn't seen them yet. 

"Class project." You answered through gritted teeth, meeting his amused gaze with a glare.

"Really? What class?" Nate folded his arms over his chest with furrowed brows, the fake curiosity on his face making a wave of irritation wash over you. Once upon a time, Nate had been your best friend. He'd been the brother you relied on for everything and then one day, a switch had flipped in him that made him unbearable to be around due to his volatile and angry nature.

"English." You walked forward and took Cassie's wrist, leading her away from your mother and smirking brother. You headed up the stairs and continued down the hall back to your bedroom, slamming the door loud enough to cease Aaron's attempts at chatting. You exhaled heavily and dropped her wrist to run your hand over your face.

"Is... Is this a bad time?" She asked softly, setting her purse aside on the desk near the door. 

"It's always a bad time here, Cass." You sighed again and approached your bed, plopping down on it and resting your arms on your thighs. "I think we need to set some ground rules. For starters, we're keeping this to ourselves, remember? That means we don't drop unannounced at each other's places, especially if our siblings are home. I like hanging out with you, Cass. You're funny and sweet and pretty but Nate will be a pain in the ass and Maddy might get mad at you if anyone else were to find out." 

"I get it." Cassie nodded, her blonde waves bouncing back and forth over her shoulders. "I'm sorry."

"I know, Cass." You extended your arm out toward her and she smiled, blue eyes sparkling as she crossed the room and happily settled down on your lap. She wrapped her arms around your shoulders and pressed her pink-colored lips against your cheek. Bumping your nose against hers, you gazed into her pretty eyes. "But please, whatever you do... don't fall in love with me.“

[leverage-ot3]

parker in the inside job is so real to me

parker, who has had a very complicated relationship with the concept of ‘family’, who blew up her abusive foster parent’s house, who bounced around the foster system before ultimately making a run for it

who was caught pick pocketing a world-renowned thief and taken in under his wing where he molded her into the best thief that ever existed, where he then ‘released her into the world’

archie took her in, yes, but he didn’t really take her in. he kept her at arm’s length, letting her live in empty warehouses and learning how to pick locks and beat security systems instead of going to school or learning what familial love was

he raised her, but only barely

and leverage did a great job of adding subtleties to her to have her come off as neurodivergent, most likely autistic. she was never what society would deem as ‘normal’, especially back then. and then archie tells nate to his face that she would never fit in, not anywhere

(and nate is mad. eliot is mad. rightfully so.)

parker is different from most people, thinks differently and acts differently. but that’s not wrong, and not her fault. but archie couldn’t see past that and take her in as she truly was, not when he had an ‘actual’ family at home. she wouldn’t fit in and that was something he wasn’t willing to risk, try or explain

and then archie calls parker asking for her thoughts on the steranko situation and she doesn’t even hesitate because his family is on the line. his real family. and he’s her father in a way no one had ever been before and looked after her in the only way she knew how and that meant something to her and she couldn’t have something like that happen to him

not on her watch

[raviposting]

Nate is really one of the most interesting characters to me, because his character begs the question: what happens when your life gets better but you’re still not happy? 

Because we see how Nate is in the beginning. We root for him and we love the attention that he gets and how he gets his time to shine. Ted’s methods clearly work for a lot of the characters, it has its merit, and Nate (at first) is no exception. He’s promoted to being a coach, he’s getting attention, the team is also improving so they’re being kinder and everything is better now, right? 

Except in season 2 (and 3!) we see the cracks - in Nate, but for all the coaches, really, because ironically the coaches who are mentoring the players and telling them to believe are also the ones we see struggling with that mentality the most. Beard’s one of Ted’s strongest supporters, his right-hand man, but we see in Beard’s episode how deep his depression and self-hatred run. Roy isn’t exactly screaming Ted’s methods from the rooftops, but we see how he slowly accepts it and appreciates it, and how it does help him - but he struggles with finding his purpose and feeling wanted and needed, and it shines in quitting things early and never getting proper closure in things he really loved, with him constantly wondering if he ever really made the best choice (his team, his job, his relationship with Keeley). Ted struggles to express these negative emotions and it spirals quickly, especially in season 2. 

And Nate? Nate watches as his life objectively gets better, but struggles because his anger and resentment don’t go away. He gets the attention from Ted but (even though it’s not the intention!) feels as if Ted drops him the second things improve. He gets a better job but his father will never say he’s proud. He tries to exude confidence but Jade (who’s most likely seen him for a while since it’s his favorite restaurant) immediately sees through through his persona and Doesn’t Care and Nate is so thrown off by it. He keeps looking for that validation through other people and we see that clear frustration because everything is better on paper so then why are the bad feelings still there? With every win, with every improvement, he gets angrier and more frustrated and then it spirals into him leaving for West Ham and Rupert. With Rupert, Nate leans in on hey, nobody loved me at my lowest and nobody loved me at my best, so maybe I’ll try being my worst. 

And god, I LOVE that even though fans thought he’d fail and that this would humble him into a redemption, he hasn’t. He tries to go with Rupert and get that validation from him and we see how much he struggles with that, because now he’s leaning in at what Rupert wants and we see how much he hates that, but Nate’s also at a point where Rupert’s attention is clearly conditional, he’s still not getting that fatherly validation, and he knows that and that’s where we see him finally start to come into his true self. Jade finally softens because she sees Nate holding strong to his opinion on Taste of Athens and admitting he’s putting on an act, he’s being honest and himself for the first time in those scenes. He tries to cultivate a relationship with the other employees and even if the Diamond Dogs ripoff didn’t work? They still invited him to drinks this episode! He sees Rupert for who he is and he goes back to Jade, and he wants so, so much to apologize to Ted for everything. 

Nate’s moved from a positive environment to this conditional one and the narrative could have easily went “Nate has crashed and burned and now realizes what he messed up” but instead it allowed Nate to figure out who he is and who he wants to be, by himself. He’s still growing and learning, of course, but he’s well on his way, and I think it’s just such a cool way to show that what’s helpful for some people can be incredibly detrimental for others if it doesn’t target what they need and that there’s so many avenues for a person to grow and improve themselves. 

[raeflora]

Do you think Chuck was an alcoholic? I could see him ending up in rehab at some point. I can also see he and Blair cheating each other---they're both the most immoral people on the planet, but I also think they'd eventually forgive each other

hi!! so truthfully I absolutely can't see either happening sorry 😭😭 chuck was always more of a drug addict than an alcoholic, although he drinks scotch on an daily basis it doesn't seem to be a problem for him unless he's spiralling and he doesn't really exhibit any signs of being an alcoholic. he turns to cocaine and other drugs when he spirals, although like serena he doesn't seem to have a cocaine addiction rather they use it when they feel things are going wrong. I think in terms of rehab if gg were real then obviously both serena and chuck would've probably had to go to rehab at some point as you can't really casually take cocaine, but it's not and after s5 neither are shown to be taking drugs (aside from chuck and nate smoking weed recreationally) so they're both not depending on drugs at all. to me chuck's version of rehab was in s5 where he goes to therapy and actively tries to improve himself, so I can't see him ending up in rehab after everything he did, and especially not now he's a father

to your other point there's absolutely no way chuck and blair would cheat on each other, and the show proved it. blair cheats on every bf she has either emotionally or physically with chuck, never on him. in s3 and s6 they're in a committed monogamous relationship (their games are the closest they get to infidelity but the rule is specifically that chuck doesn't kiss the women and blair was the one who actually came up with the games so she obviously doesn't see it as cheating) and blair canonically doesn't love any man more than she loves chuck, so she couldn't cheat on him as there's no-one she could be more attracted to or want to be with. for chuck it's basically the same, when they date in s3 he's nothing but loyal and committed and it's the same with eva and raina. there's never any real concern that he'll cheat on her, he even says that in 3x15. despite them both having dark sides and being morally dubious, that doesn't extend to the way they treat each other by the end of the show. they're both deeply in love with the other and would never risk their marriage because there's no-one worth risking it for

[datura-tea]

i just realized something. my player characters with bethesda-mandated family (lone wanderer gwen and sole survivor sofia) are estranged from that family. meanwhile my couriers (moz, kiwi, and avery) have pretty good relationships with their families :) that's what happens when a backstory isn't forced to your character i guess!!

details under the cut

gwen and james, though stuck in close proximity in the vault for 19 years, are as distant as can be. james has his work, his projects. gwen has all the turbulent drama of childhood and teenage life. they have their moments, but otherwise? nothing much. except for lectures and reprimands, they don't really talk, especially post-james and ellen's divorce. gwen has more of a relationship with ellen and butch than james.

their relationship gets worse topside, when after all gwen has done to get to james is pushed to the side because all james can think of is project purity. so after he dies, what does gwen do? let his pet project die as well. she doesn't even know what the passcode number is, when sarah lyons asks her. how the fuck would she know? her father barely told her anything. she didn't know ellen deloria wasn't her biological mom until after james divorced ellen and told gwen the truth. she's not even sure if he loved her for herself, or if he just loved her the way a parent loves their child - as an extension of themself and their values. now that he's dead, she'll never know for sure.

sofia has a good relationship with her family back home in the philippines, all six siblings and both parents and both sets of grandparents, and countless uncles and aunts and cousins of them. the problem is nate. and shaun, eventually. the thing is, sofia never imagined herself marrying a foreigner, much less a blue-eyed american soldier. she never would have married nate if he hadn't gotten her pregnant. but with abortion being illegal in the philippines, and with nate being "a true gentleman" in his words, there was little else she could do.

in boston, a shotgun wedding. which turned into a loveless marriage pretty quick, once the honeymoon phase wore off. homesickness. morning sickness. anti-asian racist microagressions from neighbors who've never met a filipino before, even though america annexed the philippines decades ago. a miserable life, freshly post-partum and friendless and jobless, all alone in a big house with only a baby and a robot butler for company. who wouldn't fall into a deep depression?

and don't get me started on shaun. sofia placed all her hopes and dreams and joys on meeting her baby boy and watching him grow up, teaching him tagalog and sharing with him all her favorite meals and memories. can you imagine how sofia felt, when he got kidnapped? when she spent her first year in the post-apocalypse relentlessly trying to find him? when she killed kellogg in her rage and grief over him? when, finally, they meet and he isn't a baby but an old man, the leader of the group she's looking to dismantle, and she realizes that he came from her but he's not of her, he doesn't know her and she doesn't know him, and she hates everything he stands for, but still she's his mother and she loves him but she'll never like him? can you imagine???

meanwhile: moz and her big family with her mothers dalisay and philomena, her big brother lakan with his wife guadalupe and their eight kids (all adopted), and her husband ulysses and their child ree, plus everyone in the painted hairs, everyone in their town whom she calls tito and tita and ate and kuya and bunso and totoy and nene :) nothing but love and understanding there!!

kiwi and their family of butchers and tailors - grandmother, father, mother, and brothers, all adept with shiny sharp things. strict but loving, in the "i want what i think is best for you" kind of way. kiwi would have stayed if their father didn't keep forcing the butchershop and their straight marriage to a family friend's daughter on them. honestly if kiwi went home, they'd find their father a changed man - he only wants kiwi to be happy, really; if wearing sequins and being the right-hand man of mr house is the key to that happiness, then so be it!

avery is an only son, raised by a single mother after his ncr ranger father died. he and his mother will defend each other to death - which is why avery set fire to his mother's asshole (now ex-)boyfriend's house when he hurt avery's mom. on the run, avery still writes letters home. he never leaves a return address until after he gains amnesty for his arson charge. by then, his return address is the lucky 38. his mom sends him one hell of a letter. the first thing he does after winning the battle of hoover dam is go home to his mom :)

[percysaidnever]

ted lasso s3e11 oh dear god

i’m not mentally stable enough to fully process so initial thoughts!!

I truly believe Phil Dunster filmed to boot room scene with the sole intention of making Brett Goldstein break character

THE PARALLELS from the very beginning of Ted being happy go lucky and loved while Rebecca is angst!! to now Ted’s mom being happy and loved while Ted is angst is truly amazing

plz rebecca getting in the team bus bc nora yelled at her about her private jet usage i love

SAM AND REBECCA TURNING TO EACH OTHER DURING THE END OF YOUVE GOT MAIL OMG

Beard’s nickname for Teds mom!!

Rebecca excited to know Teds mom!!

Mae dropping free therapy everywhere she goes?? love that for her!!

the boys showing up at Taste of Athens was so …? bc last time they were like fuck nate!! at the west ham game but now their like happy and healthy like the lovable himbos they are

this was not an episode about mother/son relationships and truly processing trauma, this was an episode about kebabs

the way Jade likes the things about Nate she doesn’t understand!!! (thinking 60 pgs is crazy but still picking up the pen to edit!!)

Roy and Keelee trying to steal follow Jamie is the funniest thing, especially when she’s farting between cars and Roy’s just on the sidewalk

he! went! to! see! his! mom!!!

i am very happy that Jamie has one canonically fantastic parent and fun baking stepdad!

also the crowd cheering him as he leaves truly made me tear up

the duality of the Roy Keelee posters in Jamie’s room

Ted and his mom having a real talk truly showing how much Ted has grown, especially with how he started off kinda anti-therapy to who he is now

question: what actually is meatloaf? I have no idea????

i know the whole thing is gonna end with Ted going back to Kansas and that’s why we have the whole, admittedly important for Ted, Henry part but I still want him to stay so badly and it feels right for the character to stay and bring Henry to Richmond

lmao the nose mask bc of Dani

Van Damme slayed so hard omg absolute king i love you baby keep saving those goals!

THE COACH BEARD LORE OMG

truly explains his dedication to Ted and why he was so angry with Nate, who hurt his friends and betrayed Teds trust the same way he did with the car

i know he’s but but for a second there i thought Jamie’s father was dead!?!

and i love Higgins and his refusal to move!! he’s so sweet!!

[faorism]

why does it seem like every tv character with an established shitty relationship with a parent (whether abusive or otherwise) has to reconcile with them lol i hate it so much

[context: this post on billy and eliot]

i have no fucking idea, other than that lev:red found ways to insist on your current (queer) found family is not enough to soothe one's soul. there is no true going forward, if you havent gone backward in order to fix something that we didnt see as broken; instead, it was a complexity that humbly fades into the background of the cool characters we love to untangle in our own projections.

reconciliation is not always the answer. the pressure to reconcile (and specifically to do so before i was ready) did irreparable damage. sometimes things happen where we came from, but we find our people. it is not a wish fulfillment fantasy i feel is necessary for leverage. archies first episode ended with difficult parent relationship done right: parker, realizing archie is not who she wanted him to be but settling into the fact that she has family now. real family. they backtracked in the last dam job, sadly.

billys wife, eliots mom, the REASON billy gave up on eliot due to the funeral absence.... she didnt warrant a first name.

they also did the billy&eliot from the other side with sophie and her first crew, but especially sophie with her stepdaughter. sophie didn't need to have a mothering role thrown on her after six seasons without it being mentioned or hinted at. (dont you think that when nate was grieving once against over sam, sophie might have mentioned ANYTHING about being a parent??). sophie suddenly became a Bad Mother that we had to just accept haunted her. and then astrid (A FUCKING SUPER COP, UGH ACAB, HATE THAT LEVERAGE LOVES COPS SO MUCH) had to just.... reconcile with the woman who broke her father's heart, broke her heart, and is still working with the tools that helped deceive her father.

is that was redemption is to lev:red? tracing back the supposed "core" of you (bio/in-law family) so you can confess your wrongs and get a stern pat on the back? maybe nate is there as a ghost but as the earlier version where he was a priest, cuz this is all sounding mighty catholic to me......

[sweaterkittensahoy]

Oh, look, more Ted Lasso 3.1 thoughts

So many. Let's go to the bullet points:

Rebecca thinking she's fine about the whole Rupert and Nate thing and clearly NOT being okay with it to the point of wanting Ted to be an asshole in response to Nate, but then, when Ted is Ted, Rebecca's realization comes from Keeley PRAISING her for a decision she didn't even make. But Rebecca realizing through Keeley's genuine praise (because Keeley wasn't there) that the best decision is to let Ted be Ted was just a really great, layered Rebecca moment.

Keeley's office doesn't look like Keeley. The neon sign does. Her wardrobe does. Those people in that office? The couch furniture in her own office? None of that is Keeley. That is Keeley thinking this is what it looks like to go into corporate PR with investor money. I look forward to watching furry pillows and glittery accessories take over the office as Keeley finds her confidence in a different phase of her career.

We all fucking know Roy is the one who decided they needed a break, and Roy, you fucking walnut. I get it. I look forward to the story of it. But the story is Keeley saying, "If I put this off again," and trying to comfort Roy, and Phoebe, smart nugget that she is, knowing stupid when she sees it. Keeley has agreed to this break up because Roy thinks it's needed, and she has no doubt spent a lot of time trying to talk him out of it. They deserve each other wholly, and I can't wait for Roy to get slapped in the face with that.

The himbos are doing great. So proud of all of them. But, yes, especially Jamie but also Richard making clear that a fine wine is not an expensive wine. But also also, all of our boys.

I love you, Jan Mass. You keep up being Dutch, kiddo.

Beard being proud of Ted for learning soccer shit and also knowing how long to wait before getting back on the bus with a toad venom-addled driver is just the perfect dichotomy of Beard.

I have a lot of thoughts about Ted's actual relationship with Henry (clearly positive and happy and healthy) and what he thinks the relationship is (distant and unhappy because he's not physically there), but if I go down that road, I'm never coming back. In short, I hope that part of Ted's journey this season is realizing he is a great fucking father and that physical distance doesn't change that.

Ted calling Sharon for a clearly planned session right after dropping off Henry? That is fucking PROGRESS my friends. And not just that, but also he doesn't question Sharon setting time boundaries OR setting personal boundaries.

I LOVE that Sharon allows him to ask personal questions because the personal connection is absolutely what Ted needs. And I love that she refuses to give him clear answers and doesn't rise to the bait he tries to set out with 'You usually say no'. The way he asks the team and the sport then asks the number of Australians, then guesses rugby, and Sharon confirms NOTHING? That's top-tier therapist shit. And we all knew she was that good, but now Ted clearly knows it too and TRUSTS it, more importantly.

I didn't notice until gif sets, but they named the stadium after Earl. Which. Shut up.

Higgins having matching Keeley mascara on his shirt makes me SO HAPPY. Because it tells you without showing you that Higgins and Keeley are still close and caring about each other. And Rebecca and Higgins having a moment about it is so NICE. Just NICE. It's fucking NICE.

I mentioned Sharon's boytoy in another post, but I want to repeat it because 1) she deserves it, and 2) he shows he deserves HER because he's wearing headphones while she talks to a client, and he doesn't take them off until after she walks in the room, clearly off the phone. He respects her as a professional. This is very important and excellent.

I am going to find Rupert and kick him in the balls as many times as I can in one minute, then I'm going to take a five minute breather and start again.

The isolation of Nate at West Ham (alone on the escalator; not answering to a polite hello; standing far away from his co-coach on the field; working far away from the locker room) is intentionally uncomfortable for us as an audience. We're used to a very collaborative coach in a close-knit environment. But that's not Nate's story. Nate's story is one of thinking isolation and arrogance will save him from his worst self-fears. We all know that shouldn't be his goal, but it isn't about how WE know he's wrong. It's about NATE figuring out he's doing it wrong.

There is no fucking way Rupert didn't know it was Nate's car when he towed it. New guy. New car in the fancy lot. Does he ask, though? No. That would be healthy. Instead, he sets it up so Nate can see he's disappointed in him without him saying it (a common abuse tactic), and then lovebombing him with a new car as a way to tighten his control (another common abuse tactic). He also encouraged Nate's worst tendencies to build a sense of safety that isn't actually there because Rupert will absolutely use those same groomed instincts at a later date against Nate (more abuse tactics).

I hope Rupert gets him by a team bus is what I'm saying. And I want Nate to be driving it and do it on purpose, frankly.

I don't want it to be Rebecca only because she's beyond that point of her anger. But I def want her to be a character witness for Nate.

I want Ted to stay in England. He's talking a lot about how he doesn't know why he is where he is or doing what he's doing. And I know a lot of people hope he goes back to Kansas. But that's not my hope. My hope is that Ted will realize he's doing great stuff with these boys and that he's a great dad even with physical distance, and he finds a new love and appreciation for himself that is directly connected to making this huge, confusing, and messy leap to go to England.

You can do something dumb (run to England to escape your failing marriage) and learn that while your instincts may have been dumb, the overall result is positive and good for you.

Which, also, could be Nate's arc this season. He made several dumb decisions about being a source and going to West Ham, but the end result could be, "Oh, shit, I don't want to be this shitty person." and then he can grow and change on a similar but different path to Ted.

Okay, that's enough. That's very long. I get a lot of feels.

[radiokathryn-if]

What are their thoughts about marriage and kids?

MARRIAGE

Nate only proposed to Eva to attach his name to her and her upcoming fame. He thinks marriage would "tie him down too much" when he's a free bird "for the people, don't want to disappoint." (he's a dick with commitment issues and an ego the size of the sun)

Eva has been dreaming of a perfect wedding since she was ten years old. She was chosen to be a flower girl in her aunt's wedding and fell in love with the whole thing… which is probably why she's still so hung up on the ring on her finger even though the person who gave it to her has lost her love.

Mica is not fussed with marriage. They don't think a relationship needs to cumulate to marriage for it to mean something real or for forever. Would be content to just be with you──you both know how much it means to you. Bonus if you're the same gender: you become the infamous 'friends who live together and everyone assumes you're together but they never confirm or deny' couple of the neighborhood.

Detective Han is surprisingly into the thought of marriage. It's only a thought that comes to them after they've dedicated themselves to you for a long while but it's one that makes them smile. Won't go extravagant for the wedding though, a smaller one would be great.

José would love to get married! They're a romantic at heart. Might actually propose first but would love it if you proposed at the same time (it's a secret dream of theirs). They'd want a big wedding but keep it simple, they don't need everything to be perfect they just want to marry you!

Ji Han will be so into the wedding planning process it's actually quite funny. He wants everything to be perfect for the two of you and it happens because he's made of magic. Husband material 100%.

One of Fauve's biggest dreams is to be one of those people that's been engaged for forever. She doesn't want to get married purely because she liked the sound of 'fiance' over 'wife'. That's the reason. She's might try to convince you to play along and keep proposing to each other every few years... keep people wondering 'aren't they already engaged???'

Jackson's not rushing to get married again. Marriage is kind of ruined for him at the moment. If it's important to you he may come around but other wise it's not really an adventure he wants to run through again.

??? is sceptical about marriage they have parental issues but not so much they hate it. They'd prefer a really small wedding of just you, a couple of witnesses and the officiant.

KIDS

Nate would rather die than be a father. It might be because of his own parents but he won't even entertain the thought.

Eva would like a child. She's the youngest of two girls──Marisol being almost seven years older than her however meant they didn't have much in common growing up. She's a little scared about pregnancy and birth but she's willing to do it at least once. Her feelings might change after the child is born if she'd want another but one child is enough for now! (She secretly wishes for a girl but she will not shun a boy, she was raised better than that!)

Mica likes children. Children are cool. They don't think that being a parent is for them though. It's not a deal breaker but it's not something they are actively looking for.

Detective Han is… indifferent about children, especially their own. They could live without them and they would definitely have an existential crisis if it turned out the two of you were expecting but they would stay and step up! The day after the news dropped they'd've bought like five books on pregnancy and babies and already studying them intently.

José loves children! They come from a big family──they have four siblings (five children including them) and is the second oldest! José would want to wait until things are very settled before starting a family but they definitely want children. Two of three would be a dream but they don't mind less or more!

Kids are something Ji Han hasn't thought of before. He's still focused on his school and professional life and then his relationship with you. It would be some to sit down and talk about because he doesn't have much of an opinion on the situation. He'd be a great uncle 100% though.

Fauve doesn't want children, it's a hard no for her. The thought of pregnancy is a terrifying one for her (and for you if you're able) and babies make her extremely uncomfortable. I might be because she was alive when her mother went through a late stage miscarriage but she isn't taking any chances. She might be open to adopting a child over the age of five if you are someone who really wants a child but she will not be giving birth──ever.

Jackson already has a daughter, Cilly. He loves her more than anything in this world. He won't object to having another child in the future, especially with you, but it's not a requirement of his, Cilly is more than enough for him!

??? would like to have children but would actually brick it if it really happened. Their own parents were not the best so they have no idea what kind of parent they'd be, which is a step towards being a good parent anyway. They'd prefer to go slow with one child but if there's more they won't complain.

[threewaywithdelusion]

I’ve been seeing the Jamie Forgiving His Dad debate and I think it’s really interesting.

A) we don’t know if he forgives his dad. All we know is that he visits him in rehab. Maybe they fight. Maybe Jamie decides he can’t be around his father because his dad finally making an effort is too little, too late. Maybe James Tartt falls off the wagon.

B) I don’t hate it as an ending because it feels true to the characters. If I were Jamie, would I forgive James Tartt? No. Do I think people should always forgive their abusive parents if they learn from their mistakes and try to be better? Also no. Do I think Jamie Tartt, as a character, is the type of person to give his dad a second chance even after everything his father put him through? Absolutely yes.

Do I think Ted Lasso is the type of person to tell Jamie to forgive his dad even though that’s arguably terrible advice? Also absolutely yes. Ted believes in second chances, even when people don’t deserve them.

Watching Ted Lasso, I was thinking about Buffy. (Haha yes, the day I don’t relate something to Buffy you will know I have been replaced by an alien lookalike).

Anyway.

In Buffy, Giles says “To forgive is an act of compassion, Buffy. It’s not done because people deserve it. It’s done because they need it.”

In some places, Ted Lasso executes that idea really well. It’s Ted forgiving Rebecca for sabotaging Richmond for a whole season because “divorce is hard.” It’s Ted telling the police that he gave Beard his car. It’s Ted never holding Nate’s betrayal against him, even though it hurt him deeply and personally, and welcoming him back with open arms.

It’s Ted, it’s Ted, it’s Ted.

Of course Ted told Jamie to forgive his father. He couldn’t ever have done anything else.

Also featured in Buffy is the idea that “redemption is a process, not an event” (to quote Mark Field in Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Myth, Metaphor, & Morality). This idea shows up again and again, but especially in the characters of Angel, Faith, Spike, and Willow.

One grand gesture is not redemption. Promises are not redemption. Redemption “is fighting. It’s hard and it’s painful and it’s everyday.” 3.10

So no, I don’t think James Tartt has been redeemed. I think he can be. If he tries really, really hard every single day for the rest of his life, then maybe he can be redeemed. He can’t know he will succeed and that’s part of the point: to struggle and fight to be good, not to win back Jamie’s affections or to be considered a good person, but because it’s the right thing to do.

(Doctor Who now: “Goodness is not goodness that seeks advantage. Good is good in the final hour, in the deepest pit, without hope, without witness, without reward.”)

Redemption is Jamie apologising to his teammates, not being a bully again, and actually passing the ball. A (much flimsier) redemption is Nate giving up the glory that he’s chased at everyone else’s expense and going back to being Richmond’s kit boy.

Redemption is not Isaac attacking a homophobic fan because that is an Event, not a Process. (If he wants redemption, he’s going to have to work harder and keep working, but I do have faith that Isaac will get there).

One of the things I like about Ted Lasso is that the characters are imperfect. Always. They work on themselves and try to be better people and they’re still imperfect. When the story ends, Roy is still the kind of guy to get into a fistfight over his ex-girlfriend. Jamie is still the kind of guy to use a leaked sex tape like a weapon when he feels threatened. Rebecca is still the kind of woman who shields herself against a relationship that could really hurt, because she's been burned before. Ted still hides his emotions behind humor and forgives people who don’t deserve it. Beard goes back to Jane.

Do the characters end up better than where they started? I’d say overall, yes. Have they fixed all their flaws and overcome all their struggles? Absolutely not.

All that to say, I like that Jamie went to see his father. Personally, I think that's going to go terribly and James is going to let him down again. I don't think James Tartt deserves forgiveness or a second chance. But Jamie has to be Jamie. And Jamie was always going to forgive his father the second James Tartt showed the slightest hint of trying to reform himself.

[exuberantocean]

One of the things that stands out about Ted Lasso is how it tackles difficult, traumatic issues like abuse and suicide.  While the show has an overall positive philosophy on the exterior the show is…not exactly dark but definitely unflinching in the way it depicts these issues affect people.

Which to me, makes it particularly distressing how these storylines are often shared and discussed in the media.  Because I’ll often see them self-censored or watered down. Ted “found his father after a gunshot wound.” 

Nate’s father is “strict and demanding.”

Jamie’s father “yells at him” after the game.”

Rupert’s infidelity is often mentioned, but his emotional abuse is ignored.

So what, you might say.  It’s just a show.  And talking about these things can be uncomfortable, triggering even.

Except not talking about these things doesn’t help victims of abuse or people suffering from trauma.  Turning a blind eye and ignoring issues never makes them go away.  But worse, watering them down actively hurts victims of abuse.

Because for a lot of people who are abused, it’s surprisingly hard to label it as such when you’re in the relationship with your abuser, especially (but not solely) when it’s emotional abuse.  The last thing you want to do is perpetuate the idea that these are not examples of “real abuse.”

Because let’s be real here:

Ted basically witnessed his fathers suicide.

Nate’s father AND much of the team abused Nate.

Jamie’s father is verbally and physically abusive.

Rupert emotionally abused Rebecca.

These are examples of abuse and trauma.  These characters represent what people are really going through in the real world and it’s important to affirm that this is, indeed, abuse and trauma.  That you have a right to find these kinds of behaviors painful.  That there is nothing wrong with you if you are hurting because you were treated like that.

I can go on about how mislabeling what these characters suffer from distorts and weakens each of these characters storylines especially for Nate, who suddenly goes from being one of the most nuanced characters on the show to a flattened caricature of a villain with no apparent motive once you take away his trauma.  Moreover, there’s probably a lot more to be said about the intersectionality of abuse/trauma/mental health and racism that I am qualified to say, other than the fact that Nate’s storyline mirrors Rebecca’s in many fascinating ways and yet she’s given a lot more sympathy and forgiveness than Nathan Shellely.

But, I think it’s important that we recognize that real people living their real lives are seeing their own struggles in this show and when other people watch and go off saying that Nathan’s dad is just “strict” or that Jamie’s dad argued with him or whatever, it’s not just devaluing what Ted/Nathan/Jamie/Rebecca’s going through, it’s also telling that person who sees themselves in those characters went through as “not that bad.”

There’s also a certain irony that part of Ted’s difficulty overcoming his father’s suicide is the culture of silence around things like this, and yet the media continuously will water it down and mislabeled it.

I do know that these topics can be and are triggering for some people.  That’s why proper trigger warnings exist.  Just like I’ve tagged this post so it can be filtered out.  A simple: this article/video will discuss/mention suicide/abuse/etc at the start allows people who may need forewarning the ability to make informed decisions before deciding whether or not to watch/read it.  Watering down the content, however, is very much not the answer.

[wildflowercryptid]

SOME MJVERSE FAMILY HEADCANONS!

kris and lyra are sisters, kris being the older of the two. she went on her journey two years before lyra and ethan go on their's, but now she's working as elm's field assistant and researches the myths and mysteries of johto whenever she can find time. ethan and lyra run into her a few times throughout their own journeys, almost always accompanied by leaf ( who was traveling through johto and insisted on joining her the moment she mentioned legendary pokémon. ) lyra also makes a habit of teasing her big sister for the obvious crush she's developing on her companion.

agatha and bertha are relatives, bertha being a direct descendant of charm while agatha is descended from one of charm's siblings back in kanto. they used to spend time with each other at family reunions as kids and still keep in touch through letters.

pheobe is half-alolan and related to acerola. staying connected to her alolan heritage is very important to pheobe and talking to acerola about the culture helps her feel more in touch with it. in turn, she helps acerola strengthen her spiritual abilities and teaches her how to better communicate with ghost-types.

hilda and hilbert are siblings, with hilbert being older by one year. they're very close and are always looking out for each other, no matter how much they bicker and rib each other. hilbert sits out on picking starters at the beginning of the game, as he received a scraggy for his birthday the year prior.

rosa and nate are twins, rosa being older by a minute. the two seem to have pretty similar personalities at first glance, ( both being high-spirited, big-hearted, and ready to take on whatever life throws at them, ) but the small differences become more obvious the more you get to know them. rosa has a tendency to run headfirst into any and all situations, which often gets her into trouble, while nate is a lot more pragmatic and tries to assess things before tackling problems. they often seem to balance each other because of this, but have to learn how to not rely on each other as much when their journeys put them on different paths.

serena is a descendant of az through her mother, grace. no one is aware of this expect az himself.

mizuki and elio are cousins, mizuki being half-alolan and staying with elio's family at the start of the game. elio is a lot more laid-back than the high-energy mizuki and often looks out for her like a big brother during her island challenge ( even though he's only a few months older than her. )

nia and penny are sisters. their parents separated when penny was pretty young, ( all the stuff going on peony and the league and rose put a major strain on their marriage, ) with their mother moving back home to paldea with her. they keep in touch through text / video chat and nia is very protective of her little sister, especially after finding out what happened at the academy.

larry is giacomo and poppy's father. he separated from their mother after coming to terms with his sexuality, but the two are still on good terms. he overworks himself to help provide for his kids, not realizing how his lack of presence could end up straining his relationship with them. giacomo is especially distant from his dad, going as far to not mention who he's related to unless asked, but that has more to do with him feeling like a failure when being compared to him than anything else. he does love hanging out with his little sister, though. ( he likes teaching her songs... and bad words, but don't tell his dad he does that. )

[nikkiruncks]

My current feelings on the T9S ships (updated)

I made this a few months ago and I thought since s2 is out, I can do this again.

Jay/Leia - I ship them even harder this season than the last because we get to see just how rock solid their relationship is. It’s like how Formciotti was a budding relationship in s1 and in s2, we see them mature. And I love their ‘I love you' arc! It’s so angsty and obstacle filled yet so them! I love how much Jay was willing to do to prove that he's changed. I can easily say that after watching this season that I can’t imagine Jay nor Leia with anyone else.

Gwen/Nikki - Still my otp of otps. I'm so happy to see more scenes of them just like I wanted. Nikki actually gets upset at Gwen for lying and the latter apologizes and is there for her. Their plot in Baby Baby Baby was also SO GOOD. It just proves why Gwen is Nikki's best option. Gwen challenges Nikki to get out of her comfort zone, and take risks. And Nikki is good for Gwen too! I feel like aside from Cole, Nikki really brought out Gwen's soft side this season. I actually have a feeling they'll end up being a thing. I hope they do.

Gwen/Cole - They were so sweet together imo. I loved seeing Gwen navigate a relationship for the first time, and I really like Cole. He’s such a sweetheart and makes Gwen really happy. I hope we see more of them in part 3. This is the only valid het ship for Gwen as far as I’m concerned.

Gwen/Leia - I love their dynamic, but I don’t ship them romantically anymore this season. They had cute moments, but for the most part, that romantic tension was gone this season. I do love seeing their friendship growing stronger and they truly remind me of Jackie and Donna, especially in the episode where Leia gives Gwen relationship advice.

Nikki/Leia - I honestly don’t know. I like how things were handled with them when it came to the Nate shit, and I loved their hug in the premiere 🥰. I'm not exactly in love with Nikki saying that Leia was "clueless" and like "a doll that was wished to life yesterday" (she’s not wrong tho since girlie was sheltered after till '95 😂) and obviously there’s the Nate stuff haha. But I like the bones we got and I think it'll be cool to see more of them in part 3.

Jay/Ozzie - I love their friendship, but I can’t see them romantically anymore, even if I didn’t only see Jay and Leia with each other 😂. I don’t see Ozzie being into Jay tbh, but who knows? Anything can happen.

Ozzie/Etienne - Etienne, you dickhead lol. Him dumping Ozzie through a phone call is so shitty and Ozzie deserves better.

Jay/Nate - Still love them. Even though Jeia is my heart, I still get Janate feels haha. I love how Jay was there for Nate during his breakup with Nikki. One thing about Jay Kelso is unlike his father, he's loyal as fuck haha. I really love their friendship in this season and I can’t wait to see more in part 3. No one gets Nate the way Jay does.

Nate/Leia - At this point, I only want them as Hyde/Donna friendship. Them being a couple at this point imo would make no sense. Both of them admitted it was just a heat of the moment thing and that they want Nikki and Jay. They still have great chemistry tho haha.

Nate/Nikki - I like their storyline a lot better this season. With them finally breaking up, Nate apologizing to Nikki, and their fwb arc. And they were so carefree and happy around one another.

But as a couple, I don’t want them back. It's like, they both are still on different pages when it comes to their futures; and I've talked how I believe that Nikki's current views on her future make them more incompatible so I'm not gonna do that again haha. Plus I feel like if they got back together, all that carefreeness and joy would be gone and they'd go back to constantly fighting.

I much rather them as friends or fwb than them becoming a couple again.

[tomwambsmilk]

if somehow shiv and tom had managed to have the open relationship convo BEFORE their actual wedding (like back in new york before they even got to europe) how do you think that would have looked like? do you think tom would have still gone along with it? would it have made their relationship better or worse

Oh, that's such an interesting question...

Fair warning that this answer is very long because I think there are a lot of contributing factors and angles that need to be explored:

First off, I think the timing of the conversation would matter. A conversation had, for instance, shortly after Thanksgiving, before anything has happened with Nate but after the idea of infidelity has been introduced, would go a lot differently than a conversation where Shiv tells Tom about Nate right before they go to Europe. (I think she would tell Tom about Nate because her desire for an open marriage is partly informed by a desire for openness and honesty; she doesn't feel capable of monogamy, and she doesn't want to be sneaking around. So, I don't think there's a world where she asks for an open marriage but hides the thing with Nate from Tom).

For her to have the conversation in advance, though, I think she'd need to be okay with the possibility that Tom would leave. I don't think she intentionally waits until their wedding night to "trap" him - although Tom clearly feels that way by 2.10 - but I do think that being married lowers the chances of him walking away simply under the sunk-cost fallacy.

I also think her desire for an open marriage is not really rooted in sexual desires but emotional ones, which is one of its significant problems. I am not at all an expert on open relationships (it's very much not something that's for me), but from what I understand, it works in situations where there's some sort of sexual disparity that's being addressed through the relationship. (I'm also distinguishing here an open relationship, which is usually just sexual, from a polyamorous one, which usually isn't just sexual and where the relationships are more complex. Again, though, I'm not an expert on either.)

I think we're meant to take at face value that Shiv has not cheated on Tom as of Thanksgiving, and I don't think we're meant to believe that infidelity has been a part of her previous relationships. There's some implication that she's had a lot of sexual partners (although a lot of that is coming from other people and in circumstances where they're trying to shame her, so I take that with a grain of salt) but never an implication that she cheated on any of them. So, I think the desire to not be exclusive is very much connected to their engagement and the prospect of marriage.

There are a couple of theories out there as to what the specific reason is; Sarah Snook said in an interview once that her belief is that Shiv has never seen a marriage that didn't feature infidelity, especially within her family, and that's why she herself feels incapable of monogamy. All of her father's marriages were characterized by cheating, and she is her father's daughter. And likely, she saw the negative impact this had on his marriages, especially on her mother. So, her solution is an open marriage. Maybe if we can codify the infidelity, we can weather the storm. Maybe if we agree in advance that this is okay, and we (I) can be honest about what's going on, it won't break us like it did my parents.

I think there's probably a lot of truth to that. I think another contributing factor is likely just a fear of intimacy, particularly emotional intimacy. I do think her affair with Nate and the open marriage is, in part, a way to create some emotional distance from Tom. She's not a person who feels safe in relationships, in general, and so I think the prospect of being married to one person, and the expectations of physical and emotional exclusivity that generally go along with that, is frightening to her, especially when coupled with that fact that marriages are theoretically supposed to be permanent. She needs some kind of ripcord for when it becomes too much, and I think that's what the open relationship is meant to do: sleeping with someone else, sharing that physical intimacy with someone else, relieves some of the emotional burdens she feels from monogamy. (She doesn't need this before the engagement because, before the engagement, she can theoretically walk away whenever she wants; while the divorce is, of course, an option, I think it's one she probably really wants to avoid, given her own upbringing, and that increases the pressure on her immensely.)

So, with all of that background - I think that if Shiv had the conversation around Thanksgiving, very clearly articulating what it is she wanted rather than hinting with the infidelity thing and hoping Tom would be okay with it...

Well. I think regardless of the timing an the circumstances, Tom's initial, gut reaction would be hurt. And part of this is because Shiv's desire for an open marriage is rooted in insecurity; I don't think she'll be able to frame that desire in a way that doesn't cause Tom to feel like he's personally lacking on some level. Like he's not enough, and this is a personal failing. And his own self-loathing tendencies mean he's going to be inclined to read it that way, even if she was able to present it in a way that was perfectly neutral.

But I think because this is how he would take the request, I don't think he'd be able to articulate his own concerns around it. Tom very much wants to be monogamous, and he isn't going to be happy in any kind of non-monogamous relationship. But - he doesn't have the personal security to be able to say that, and the timing of the conversation isn't going to change this.

So I think he would still agree, because he loves Shiv and wants her to be happy, because he hates and himself and so this makes a sort of tragic sense to him, and because he's afraid that if he loses her he's not going to find anyone else - and, if we're being honest, because walking away from that relationship is going to put his career in jeopardy. I absolutely do not believe this is his primary reason for marrying Shiv, but he's definitely aware of it, and it's just going to be another reason to try and do the "open relationship" thing.

I don't think there's any world in which this is a good thing for either of them, because of Tom's insecurity and because of Shiv's motivations. I also think that Shiv pretty clearly does have some kind of emotional connection with Nate, which means we're already looking at a relationship that sort of breaks the boundaries that get put around "open relationships" - so I just think no matter how you slice it, no matter the timing, it is going to end in disaster.

However. I think if they had this conversation around Thanksgiving, and then were able to use the intervening months as a sort of "trial run", they wouldn't have gotten married - which I think would have been the best outcome for everyone involved. I think there's decent odds Tom would have reached the breaking point of his misery before the wedding, and would have decided to cut his losses and take the career hit and move on - especially because, if they aren't yet married, there's less pressure to stay together and try to make it work. Plus, if this isn't sustainable for him there's an incentive to figure that out definitively before the wedding.

There's an alternative possibility where he goes to leave and Shiv decides to give up the open relationship so he'll stay. But I'm not actually sure she would... I think it's pretty clearly her intent through season 1 to stop sleeping with Nate or anyone else when they get married, and instead, when push comes to shove, she feels she has to ask for the open relationship. Monogamy is not something she believes is sustainable for her. Additionally, I think the open relationship would put so much strain on both of them (especially Tom) that other parts of their relationship would deteriorate as well, and it might not feel like there's much left to save.

If they have the conversation right before they leave for Europe? That's a bit more of a wildcard. Tom is clearly willing to call off the wedding if he thinks Shiv doesn't want it. Finding out about the affair is also going to be a significant emotional blow to him. I think the proximity to the wedding means it'll be hard for Shiv to make the request for an open marriage sound reasonable and well-thought-out - it's going to sound to Tom like she just wants to keep fucking Nate.

On the other hand - would Tom really call off the wedding if Shiv wanted to go through with it? I don't know. Calling off the wedding that close to the date is going to cause a lot of gossip and speculation, and again, we're looking at the career blow. Plus, he does love Shiv, and they've spent months building up to the wedding, and the closer they get to the wedding the more sunk-cost fallacy is involved. Theoretically they could postpone the wedding until they both have more certainty, but I don't think either of them would think to do that.

I've debated with people whether or not Tom believes Shiv the night before the wedding when she says she hasn't slept with anyone else. Personally, I don't think he does, but decides to go through with the marriage anyways, committing to the illusion that it's something that it isn't (monogamous). (I also think that's why he tells Shiv about the cruise documents - to create that intimacy, and to bind her to him a little more with this shared secret.) So this is where I'm torn - I think the key question is, would he call off the wedding if she was honest with him?

Ultimately? I think not. I think at that point, they would have gone through with the wedding no matter what. And maybe, in a certain sense, this would have given them a better chance, since there isn't the baggage of Tom feeling "Shanghai-ed into an open-borders free-fuck trade deal". I think they'd both still be miserable, but there would be more of a feeling on Tom's part that he consented to this misery, and that's going to change the way he approaches the relationship and Shiv. He wouldn't be able to hold it against her quite the same way he does in canon (although I think he still would resent her for it, just... quietly). It definitely wouldn't be a healthy relationship, but... maybe it would be a bit more stable.

[wellnoe]

I love love love all of your art, and tbh you're the reason I love Madelyne and Rachel so much now (especially Mads I love her), and I was wondering exactly how many kids Cyclops has? And how do you think his relationship is different with each kid?

scott has 3 children in 616: nate, rachel, and nathan. i am going to be honest right out the gate i know nothing about nate. he's from a different universe or a different timeline or something. i don't think he and scott have much of a relationship? i don't know that he even really sees scott as his father or a father figure? i have read exactly 1 comic that he appears in. i guess scott did kind of die for him, but in my head that ends up affecting scott's relationship with cable more than with nate.

i think that scott thinks his relationship w cable is more precarious than his relationship w rachel. this is bc his relationship to cable has been largely defined by the threat of nathan being taken from him, or having to literally acquiesce to nathan being taken from him, and also bc cable had/has a lot of grievances against his dad.

cable and scott don't exactly see eye to eye. they have different ideas and different approaches and also cable spent a lot of time being upset about decisions scott had made while nathan was a baby. while scott and rachel certainly have had uhhh rifts in their relationship, i think scott still thinks of rachel as someone who is like. committed to the x-men and that kind of way of fighting in a way he does not with cable. and i also think scott is more able to see rachel as a kid. bc she is younger than him. and that makes some things easier.

like i just think scott and cable's relationship is way more defined by a sense of scott's failings (personal and ideological) than scott and rachel's is, even when rachel also gets mad at scott? that is my impression anyway.