#and buying more disposable wipes

[tafadhali]

I would have just cleaned my kitchen tonight if I’d known my brain would just keep me awake playing out in detail the steps of cleaning my kitchen from the moment I conceived the plan until, apparently, dawn

[gremlingottoosilly]

Crybaby!Reader X Mafia!König

oh the poor woman..

Somebody free my girl!! Konig is an old, corrupted mafia dog who just loves to see you squirm. He never thought of himself as particularly sadistic towards women - he can be cruel towards men and traitors, but he was usually well-behaved around the ladies...well, you can say that you corrupted a gentleman his momma raised. The first time you cried in front of him, tugging on his sleeve as he was disposing of some dumb fuck who walked on you kissing at the VIP room of the club, you were dragged by accident - he knew he had to keep you. He was mesmerized by your tears; he loved your body trembling, and it got even better when he pushed his hand into your panties and felt the wetness of involuntary arousal collecting in the soaked fabric. God, you're beautiful - and you just signed your death sentence. He drags you with him everywhere, even though usually he likes to keep his pretty girls safe and sound in the various properties he owns - but he loves your reactions too much to keep you caged. It's a small mercy - you are not technically locked in one room, but you also have to witness him killing the enemies of the family like it's nothing - and then he would squeeze your soft, tear-stained cheeks and ask why you cry so much. He thought you were already used to things like this - he thought you knew better than to show your tears to someone who would lick them all away and say that they tasted sweet. To be completely honest, he adores you. Your trembling body, your soft features, your everything - you beg him not to shoot a guy from another gang not because you really care about human life, but because the sound of guns going off makes you really, really sad. Poor little thing, he is buying your affection with stuff later - he is giving you nice gifts; for example, he wipes your face with an expensive handkerchief and smiles when you tremble even more under him.

[kenananamin]

Nanami as a girl dad

Nanami is a girl dad, I will not argue or fight on this but if you think he's not... i got news for you ANYWAYS these are my Nanami headcanons as the best husband and dad and what he would do as a girl dad during pregnancy, birth, and actually raising the baby

takes a personal day off work to take you to your doctor's appointments then takes you to brunch and a movie. will hold your hand the whole time

fought HR/managers/supervisors/ANYONE for as much paternity leave as he could get

asked if he could work from home bc he doesn't want to miss a single moment of your pregnancy or newborn baby

sits on the floor to talk to his baby girl and holds your tummy saying that he's holding her hand

made 20 copies of the sonogram picture and kept them all. there's a copy in his wallet, behind his phone case, in the glove compartment, and in every suit jacket pocket close to his heart. he likes to brag about his girls (you and baby)

comes back from the store with more diapers and wipes bc "we need to be prepared"

bookmarks blog posts talking about how to bond with your baby

reads every book he can and asks the doctor more questions than any other dad who comes into the office

will ask anyone he trusts for advice, but gets defensive when someone tells him to do something differently

takes naps with his head on your lap and his lips touching your belly

has two hospital bags ready in the closet but has an emergency one in the trunk... just in case

does not sleep the whole time you're in labor even when the nurses tell him to "rest before the baby gets here"... that gets him more excited and doesn't let him sleep

tells you to dig your nails into his arm if you need to when you start pushing. kisses your entire face when the baby starts to cry and rushes to the nurse holding her to ask if they could stamp the baby's feet on his shirt/gown before cleaning her (a/n: my dad did this with me and it is the cutest thing ever. we still have the gown with the tiny feet stamped on there)

carefully takes off the shirt/gown and immediately wants to do skin-to-skin contact after you hold the baby first

follows baby to the hospital nursery and takes pictures of sleeping baby to change his wallpaper

changes wallpaper every two days bc "she did something cute" or "sticking her tongue out" or "giving me the stink eye"

loves waking up with her at night bc besides letting you rest... it's daddy-daughter time so don't interrupt

demonstrates what tummy time is while she lays on her baby bouncer (you laugh bc it's ridiculous and she's only a couple weeks old)

buys scrapbook and disposable cameras to start an album (the first of a hundred probably)

buys special clips for crib blankets to be tight and immovable around mattress bc he kept reading about possible suffocation

either way, does not like for her to sleep in her own room so he buys an extra baby moses to put in your room

has an extra diaper bag in his car bc he likes impromptu trips to let mommy rest

sulking when he has to go back to work

finds remote job within the next month

sits baby down on his lap while be works and she plays with her toy

throws an intimate 1st bday party first then a second one the next weekend to invite anyone he's ever talked to and brag about his family

literally kicks his feet and giggles with his daughter then stands up to be the most intimidating man to anyone else

tears of joy when you're pregnant again and sobs when they say it's a girl

carries his girls with him everywhere he goes

is proud that he's raising strong women who will learn how to fight for themselves. keeps reminding himself that he's raising the next generation and that fuels a fire deep inside him

let's the girls play with his hair and put all the clips they can find around the house on his head

lets his fingers and toes be horribly painted while he reads the newspaper and leaves the house with those nails

gets teary eyed on the first day of school and waits outside the school the whole day for a week (paid time off used)

can only do simple pony tails and braids but loves waking the girls up, sitting them on his lap and doing their hair while you get them dressed

making cute lunches for the girls with you is one of his favorite parts of the day

likes dressing the girls alike or the same and has a strange obsession with buying them overalls

loves playing barbie with them and lowkey has a favorite barbie

goes toy shopping behind mommy's back and tells the girls that this is the only secret that they can ever ever keep

randomly brings back flowers for every single one of his girls

takes his girls (you and daughters) on group and individual dates

makes the girls sign a contract written in crayon stating they "will love daddy forever"... frames it and puts it in his office

cries tears of joy AGAIN when you're pregnant with another girl... and looks for a bigger house

rips off door side where he was marking the girl's height and puts it in the new house. he did not believe in marking/tracing it on another thin piece of wood and said he wanted the original

takes everyone out for dessert every Friday and checks in on each kid to see how they're feeling and if they're ok

never misses a single game, recital, rehearsal, practice, ANYTHING

takes his daughters to their first self-defense class

does not believe in violence and does not condone it... but will first ask the girls if they won the fight (strongly insinuates that he will be disappointed if someone kicks their ass)

corrects the girls when needed and has a special look to tell them to stop messing around

later goes to apologize if he ever uses the look

will ask the girls for a sleepover and will throw every blanket on the floor to make one huge bed

tells the girls to follow him as he does repairs around the house or on the car bc they "need to know how it all works and how to deal with it"

is shocked when you're pregnant again (even though he likes to do a certain something that leads to babies) but is REALLY SHOCKED when it's a boy this time

reminds the girls that they have to be nice and helpful with their brother

starts all the reading and bookmarking all over again, but his time on how to raise a gentleman

raises the best little dude and let's the girls show him everything he has shown them so far

okaaaay okay i know i said he's a girl dad and a girl dad only buuuuut Nanami would raise the best little gentleman ever. AND IMAGINE A MINI NANAMI?!! ... but he's still a girl dad first and foremost

extras:

would absolutely praise his wife and randomly thank her for giving him a family

will wear a disguise and follow daughters to first date

refuses to parentify any of his kids and wants to let them be kids

constantly reminds them that they only get to be kids for a short amount of time then they have to be adults for the rest of their lives. so be silly

is always down for a quiet drive if anyone needs to clear their head

dreads the day when he will no longer he able to carry his kids on his shoulders

has already made mental plans for every possible situation the kids may create, even the absolutely crazy ones his brain has imagined

is very open w the girls and talks about safety in intimacy

leaves cute notes during bad or iffy days and writes motivational quotes on their mirrors with dry-erase markers

loves when you say he's a dilf

tries to talk to them about the stock market

passes his budgeting king crown to the kids

feels super cool when his kids brag to their friends about him, even puffs his chest a little bit

[lynk-zee]

Transported

Part 1 here.

Speechless. One moment you were in Zayne’s phone on a virtual date, the next a bright light engulfed the room, a life sized, in the flesh, version of you standing in his bedroom.

Zayne would be so confused—how is that scientifically or medically possible? But you were here! You were real! And your eyes shined so bright when you looked at him.

“Zayne!” You ran forward and slammed him into a hug. “It’s so nice to actually hold you…”

Frozen. He stood there, arms in the air from shock as your very warm and real body embraced his own. He must be dreaming…

But he wasn’t. Because you were still there when he woke up the next morning. Was this the rest of his life.

Zayne would definitely take care of you, teaching you how to cook, going on little dates with you. At least now the money he spends won’t go to a corporation. Now, all his time and efforts will go to you!

He was laying back in bed, in the middle of one of your spicier memories. Rafayel couldn’t take his eyes off the screen, especially when you started pulling your strap down to taunt him. Then something strange happened. Your dialogue box opened, saying, “Wouldn’t this be better in person?”

A bright flash engulfed the room, making him cover his eyes and hiss. All of a sudden a weight was sitting in his lap and when the light died down there you were, in that same outfit you were in during your “date”. His jaw dropped as you smirked down at him.

“Hello, Rafayel..”

Combusted. Rafayel died…

…Of happiness!

He would take such good care of you, worshipping you like the deity he thought you were, buying and dressing you in whatever clothes you wanted. He’d model his art after you, the prices of his paintings skyrocketing from how absolutely breathtaking you made his work. With you, real, and on his arm, Rafayel would be the happiest man alive!

Xavier was in the middle of a mission when it happened. Traversing through a no-hunt zone, wiping out any and all wanderers that lingered. He got a notification on his phone that your character wanted to go on a date, but he was so hunting wanderers that he didn’t notice. That made you mad.

So once the excitement died down and the wanderers in the vicinity were no more, Xavier’s phone started flashing. At first he panicked, thinking it was his evol was having problems, until the surrounding area was engulfed in light. And you were there, standing in your date outfit. Your cheeks puffed, your hands on your hips as you reprimanded him for missing your date.

“And I thought we had something special!”

Right as you were talking, a surprise wanderer spring up from underneath you. You screamed as your body flew from the force. Xavier caught you quickly, disposing of the wanderer without a second to spare. You looked up at him in awe, his jaw clenched in sheer focus as he scanned the surrounding area one last time. Then he turned to you.

“Are you alright?”

You could only blush and nod as he sets you down, taking your hand to take you home. Xavier took your sudden appearance with grace, having seen weirder things in his time. But as you hand fed him egg tarts at his home, he decided that this was the best phenomenon he’s lived through.

[richarlotte]

Hair Removal Methods.

I was heavily inspired by a post I found on Reddit when making this post. I haven’t seen too many posts about hair removal methods on Tumblr, and I have quite a few asks in my inbox about that, so it made sense for me to make a small guide with tips, methods, and recommendations. If you want more information, product names, my sugar wax recipe, or just recommendations, please don’t hesitate to send me an email or just comment below for me to respond.

Shaving.

Cost: $

Speed: Average

Smoothness: Average

Discomfort: Low

Tips/Methods:

* Always buy men’s razors. They usually come with  sharper blades that don’t clog as much as the blades on women’s razors.

* I only shave using hot water and when I’m in the shower. The hot water softens the hair and makes it easy to remove, and the flow of the water prevents my razor from clogging.

* The direction you shave is important. If you shave against the grain (the direction opposite the hair points), you can get a closer shave, but you risk ingrown hairs. Shave with the grain on sensitive areas and do multiple passes if needed.

* I personally use shaving cream from EOS and products from Topicals to lessen ingrown hairs and clear up dark marks. Shaving isn’t my preferred method or hair removal, but when I’m in a rush, it gets the job done.

Best for your whole body, especially large and flat areas like your arms and legs. It's cheap and effective but often time consuming. If you want to maintain a perfectly smooth body, you’ll have to shave or touch up at least twice a week.

Nair/Chemical Removal.

Cost: $

Speed: Medium

Smoothness: Smooth

Discomfort: Low

Tips/Methods:

* There are many brands but the basic idea is you apply the cream to your skin, wait 5-10 minutes while the hair “melts" off your body, then you wipe it off. You’ll definitely need to shower after using Nair to remove any excess cream and to avoid burning your skin. I would say this is mandatory unless your specific brand says otherwise.

* The process will probably smell pretty bad. You'll want to wipe the cream and hair off with something disposable to avoid ruining your regular towels. I personally use tissue, you can use anything easily accessible.

* PATCH TEST BEFORE USE. These creams and powders are made from very really strong chemicals and can absolutely mess you up if you aren't careful. Everyone's skin is different, so put a little on your arm first, see how it reacts, then use it on a larger area.

Best For: Armpits and pubic hair. I find these creams are best at getting hard to reach or uneven surfaces that your razor might struggle with. This is also a good option if you are in a hurry or don't have the option to try the options below.

Epilation.

Cost: $$

Speed: Slow

Smoothness: High

Discomfort: High

Tips/Methods:

* Epilators look kind of like foil shavers you'd use for your face, but the end has a roller with tiny clamps that essentially grab hairs and pull them out.

* Personally I think these hurt like a bitch, especially the first time you use them. You can definitely feel each individual hair get pulled out of your skin.

* The main benefit of an epilator (and waxing, discussed below) is that you're pulling the entire hair out, root and all. This means hair in that area will grow back significantly slower than shaving. It also means that if you're willing to commit to a routine, each future use with the epilator will be less painful.

* I highly recommend icing the area before and after to avoid swelling. That being said, the area needs to be completely dry for the device to work.

* Epilator performance has always been pretty hit and miss for me. They're good at getting coarse hair, but will struggle to get fine or short strands. Again, you will likely need to make a shaving pass to clean up anything left behind.

* Additionally, if your hair is too thick or the surface is too uneven, the epilator can get tangled and stop functioning leading to a super painful situation. As with any of these tips, definitely test on a small area and see how it performs for you so you can get a feel for the length/thickness your device can handle.

Best For: Flat smooth surfaces, primarily your arms, legs, and torso. Some people really love epilation, others don’t. I think epilation is an acquired taste and it’s not my favorite method.

Waxing.

Cost: $$ to $$$

Speed: Slow

Smoothness: High

Discomfort: High

Tips/Methods:

* When you need to get 100% smooth there is no substitute. I love the way my body feels after waxing or sugaring and it’s what works best for me.

* I'll do my best here as a general overview but please watch some video guides before attempting this. I'll cover the two most common options I have experience with: soft wax, sugaring, and hard wax.

* Soft Wax: Hot wax is applied to the skin, then bandage strips are applied over. Once the wax cools, the strips are pulled off, taking the hair with them. This method is probably what you've seen in movies. They're good for getting rid of finer hairs, but unlike hard wax, you risk taking off your skin if you do it wrong. If you're trying waxing at home (especially for the first time), avoid this option. Despite the name, hard wax is actually much safer and what I recommend

* Hard wax: Hot wax is applied to the skin. Once it hardens, you peel the wax off by itself, taking hair with it. Since hard wax only bonds to hair and not skin it's a much safer option for beginners and does just as good a job removing hair as soft wax. This is what I use when I don’t have time to make my sugaring solution and I've never looked back.

* Wax is warmed in a... wax warmer! It's a little pot with a heating element, kind of like a croc pot. Hard waxes come in pellets that you dump in, soft waxes usually come with their own container that pops into the unit. Look for a wax warmer that can adjust the temp, not just an on/off switch. Most but not all have this feature. Each wax brand is different so you'll need more/less heat to melt it correctly, especially if you're doing a longer session where the wax can begin to solidify in the pot.

* Popsicle sticks are a cheap, effective way to apply wax. You'll want something disposable as it can get quite messy.

* Waxing, like epilators, will slow down your hair growth. This means the more you do it in the same area the less hair will grow back, and the less painful each subsequent application will be.

* Your hair needs to be a certain length for the wax to catch, so check your brand and plan accordingly. My professional technician has mentioned 1/4th inch is a good guideline for when to start waxing.

* As with every method on this list, please test on a small part of your body first. The wax will be quite hot (like getting into a hot bath) but not so much that it burns your skin.

Best For: any area you want super smooth or silky.

Laser Hair Removal.

Cost: $$$$

Speed: Slow

Smoothness: Depends.

Discomfort: High

Tips/Methods:

* Getting started will take some time and effort. You have to set up a consultation beforehand before even scheduling a session where you'll talk to the professional, ask any questions, then work out your plan.

* Laser hair removal is a process over time, not a one and done. Considering each session can cost hundreds of dollars, we are talking a huge investment. It cost me $800 over 4 sessions just for a small area on my lower body. For larger areas, we could be talking thousands!

* On that note, the total cost is going to vary a ton. Not only will each area be priced differently, but most places require you to book multiple sessions in a row or packages of X sessions you can choose to use over a year.

* The pigment of your skin matters a lot. Generally speaking the darker your skin the harder/less effective the process will be. There are different types of lasers available that may make this irrelevant but you'll definitely want to do your homework.

Final Thoughts.

What matters most is time. If you have the time to wax or shave your whole body, go to a professional for laser hair removal or pro waxing, or epilate yourself, then you’ll have much better results than someone who rushes through everything. Learning, investing in quality products, and then actually investing time into the hair removal process will get you closer to where you want to be without wasting as much time or money as you would leaping in blind or with no effort.

Richarlotte x

[blissfullyecho]

some spring deep cleaning ideas for your apartment 🤍

today i’m focusing on deep cleaning my apartment because i completely forgot spring started on monday lol. my advice: always give your space a good deep clean at least 2-4x a month (or more, who cares) and always deep clean every season.

clean blinds

clean windows

sweep balconies

clean mirrors

organize under the sink (kitchen + bathroom)

clean inside drawers

move furniture and sweep/vacuum/mop underneath

strip wash your pillows

repaint over scratched walls + patch up holes

organize closet

mop inside the closet

laundry + fold and put away

change ac filter

change water filter (refrigerator)

pest control (i have it included in my rent but because i live in a semi-tropical environment, i do have crawlies come in sometimes so i buy my own pest control and make sure i place it inside and outside)

deep clean litter box

disinfect doorknobs and handles

clean makeup brushes

clean garbage cans and trash cans

wash bedding

dust ceiling fans

clean base of plant pots

wash/clean your sneakers

put your backpack in the laundry

throw away expired food

organize important papers

get rid of wasp nests outside

dishes

oven cleaning

clean garbage disposal

new air fresheners

fresh air from keeping windows open (turn cleaning fans on so the air can circulate)

wipe off computer, phone, tablet, and tv screens

scrub toilets and bathtubs/showers

put things back where they belong

spray and wipe off washer and dryer

sweep floors, then vacuum (i have hardwood all over my apartment and i still vacuum because it’s easier), then i mop (pine sol is amazing— i love the scent).

put in maintenance requests if needed

clean dryer vents

wash sofa cushions and pillow cases (even on throw pillows)

wash mildew off shower liner

get hair unclogged from drain

clean out your car

refill anything like pens, water bottles, etc.

steam clean carpets

have a professional come and clean rugs

clean welcome mat

replace lightbulbs if needed

toss, donate, and keep clothes in your closet and dressers

happy spring

[lowkeyrobin]

hiii so im very sick right now (allergies💔), so could you maybe do like mcyt comforting/taking care of a sick reader? thank youu -🦢

omg sameeeee eugh ; but yeah, thanks for requesting! ; hope you feel better 🦢 🫶❤️ ; cast is short bc I didn't have anymore ideas lmfaooo

MCYT ; sickly

includes ; tommyinnit, ranboo, badlinu, & maxggs

warnings ; language, mentions of throwing up, allergies/flu/fever symptoms

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

giving you lots and lots of soup / tea & honey

he does not give two shits if he gets sick, he will be giving you love and affection

he's making sure there's a trash bin / large bowl at your disposal for any... bodily fluids /ns

he has to go get you more tissues and literally spends 15 minutes in the store debating which ones you'd want

he can't even ask cause you're asleep for once and doesn't wanna disturb you

"i got four flavors of throat lozenges because i dunno what you like"

runs you a warm bath every day you're sick

you're basically quarentining together let's be honest

2020core!-

RANBOO

again, a sweetheart

they're not getting within a 6 foot radius of you cause they don't wanna catch anything from you

"its allergies, I'm not contagious"

"you don't know that"

buys the entire pharmacy for you

straight up calls his mom because he doesn't know what to get you

in their defense, what's the difference??

makes you watch asmr videos when you're dealing with headaches cause your sinuses are fucked

they're actually really entertaining

there's a whole rainbow of medicines so they organize it in rainbow order while you're asleep

FREDDIE BADLINU

there's now a whole row of soup in your pantry

literally the only liquids you're drinking for a week are water and tea 😭

there is no shame in this game, he couldn't care less if you throw up cause like, you're sick, why would he judge?

always making jokes/saying dumb shit to make you laugh

but then you start coughing and choking on mucus and then he feels awful

tweets that your "cough sounds like a dying squirrel" 💀

not afraid to cuddle with you or anything once he realizes you aren't contagious/ remembers he has a good immune system

(he ends up sick as well)

might as well be March 2020 again cause the amount of wet wipes he has laying around is wild like calm down

MAXGGS

feels so bad that you're sick

he was blowing pollen in your face so he feels like he's to blame (it's just the seasons changing)

he'll make fun of you plenty tho

so many sick selfies 💀

"which flavor do you prefer? cherry or grape?"

"neither tbh"

"cherry it is then"

"just take a throat lozenge"

"I'd rather die"

if your hair is long enough, he's holding it back when you're throwing up

lots of just trying to physically make you feel better

and lots of joking and watching funny shit on YouTube

[shini--chan]

Can i req yandere sheet: attributes,flight, punisment for canada and russia?

Yandere Character Sheet I

1p Russia - Ivan Braginski

This is probably something I should have said before, but better late than never. Some of you might be inclined to voice your political opinions - with this I politely ask you to refrain from doing so. This has nothing to do with my own political stances and everything to do with this not being a politics blog. If somebody does decide to air their political opinions in the comments or ask box, it will be deleted without prior warning or further ado. Freedom of expression also means freedom to not express my opinions which is why politics will never be discussed on this blog. 

Also, only whole Character Sheets may be requested!

Trigger warning: isolation, hyperthermia, hunting (with you as the prey), murder, disposal of corpses, controlling behaviour, manipulation, hints of survival horror, neglect, implied physical abuse

Attributes - What sort of Yandere is he/she?

Ivan is ultimately possessive. He has been lonely for so long, unable to connect with other people on a deep emotional level for so long. Therefore, when he has you in his grasp, you can be assured that he'll never let you go. Why should he, when you are his happiness? In the end, it isn't very important to him to know everything there is to you, as long as you are at his side (Though, that doesn't mean that he isn't curious about you). 

If there is one defining thing about him, it is that he is unpredictable. He is a land of contradictions, the ultra rich live close to the dirt poor, with warm summers and hellishly cold winters - it is something that also reflects in his demeanour. He can be cultured - leading you out to theatre plays and ballets, visiting art museums and cuddling on the sofa at night and reading the classics with you. Or he could drag you along on a hunting trip, where the two of you have to live off the land for a few weeks. The ballroom or the heavy metal concert in the cellar of an old factory. It thus extends to his more unhealthy behaviour where he can maintain a stoic appearance for long, only for the emotions to concentrate into something more intense and then bubble over. It could often catch you unawares. 

This is only amplified by the fact that he tends to humour the misconceptions that many people have about him. After all, if they base their actions on stereotypes and fantasies, then it means they'll underestimate him, and he'll have the upper hand and wipe the floor with them. 

Aside from that, he is also very persistent. Russian winters are long and harsh, and additionally, Ivan has learned through his own history that nothing good ever comes easily. As such, he definitely wouldn't be dissuaded if you'd throw obstacles in his path. If anything, he would find it amusing that you think him so weak. So, no matter how far you run, no matter how much time passes, he won't forget you; all you can hope is that he'll lose interest or something else will take up the majority of his attention for a lengthy amount of time. 

He can also be surprisingly astute and attentive to you, and this can be to your advantage as much as it can be to your disadvantage. Advantageous in that be can be very considerate - offering his jacket, or buying you presents that you like. It is also where his obsessive nuances would come to the fore and he would be so eager to please and pamper you. 

The flip side of this coin is tied in with his paranoia. Having lived under countless occupations, regimes and suffered through rebellions and revolutions, plagues and famines, he would constantly be on the lookout for signs of betrayal. He is the sort to always look at his bedroom door before turning in and take keen note of people on the edges of his vision. Applied to you, that means he'll keep a very close eye on you if he thinks that you are being … disagreeable. There is the temptation to keep you under lock and key, but he knows that he has the best chance of catching you if it is in the middle of the act and if you are completely unaware of his suspicions. 

There is also the matter that he has the proclivity to be very harsh. After the life he has lived, the bloodshed he has witnessed and even partook in at times, it is difficult to faze him. Thus, his interpretation of what is hurtful or even traumatising is severely different than that of other people, thanks to his blood soaked frame of reference. While he is aware of this, it still would often happen that he would scoff and label you or other people fragile when tears are shed about genuinely hurtful things. Naturally, this further influences how he treats you - varying from being too harsh with his punishments to then treating you like a fragile doll that would need toughening up before being allowed out without supervision.

Ivan is also patronising. Not to the extent Yao is, but still to an overtly noticeable degree. The main difference is that he bases it not at all on seniority but on having lived through interesting times aplenty. He has had to claw his way to his current position with nearly nothing given easily and everything painstakingly defended over and over again (at least that is how it is in his mind). Can you even claim to have suffered through a fraction of the tragedies he has? So heed his word since he is a more knowing and experienced person than you.

Cornering - How would they get you?

Ivan would much prefer you come to him willing. Perhaps you are charmed by his appreciation of the arts and literature - then he'll try to woo you by playing the gentleman or the daring young hussar. Maybe you met him as an attendee of heavy metal concerts, as a hunter in the steps and the woods - he'll indulge you so as well, showcasing the more savage part of himself. The point is that he'll try to pinpoint an angle from which he can hook you in, and then pull you closer. 

But soon enough, conventenal wooing wouldn't be enough for him - his "passion" would only overcome his patience and he would want to haul you in quicker. Perhaps he would orchestrate circumstances so that you would be forced to move in, or he would manipulate events that you would have to rely heavily on him. He would dissuade you from seeking out friends and family, depicting them as parasitic and unhelpful. Whatever fears and doubts you have about your other chosen company. If he has to stand against the world, then he wants it to be with you at his side. 

Though, it can just as well be that he'll have to resort to more permanent and extreme measures. At his core, he is a hunter and like any accomplished hunter, he doesn't automatically go after the weak or old - rather, it is the prized pelts of the strongest creatures he wants. The more you prevail against him, the more it will excite him. To him, catching you will be more of a game than anything else, a game of cat and mouse. If he were angry with you, it would also serve as a moral lesson. 

Then there is the matter that he likes to manipulate events so that you end up in his arms - he is calling in favours, or gently nudging circumstances to play out in his favour. When it is required, he can be very patient and act with a lot of thought. He is more the sort to plan for the long term, even if he does have bouts of impulsivity. 

Expectations - What do they expect of you?

He holds a certain ideal in his head, that he wishes you to fulfil. If you aren't really there yet, it is still fine - diamonds have to be cut and polished as well in order to achieve their brilliance. Why shouldn’t it be the same with you? Nevertheless, he has some expectations that you have to fulfil, in his eyes. 

Politeness is one of them. This doesn’t mean that he wishes you to be unfailingly appeasing and gentle and kind all the time, all no. In his eyes, it is perfectly worthy of praise and encouragement if you have sharp edges. It is simply that you have to have tact and not make any scenes in public, and know how to act appropriately in any given moment. And that when you don’t really know how you should act, or are exceptionally jittery, that you don’t make a fool of yourself. What Ivan expects is that politeness that comes from having lessons on diplomacy or etiquette, or even just a good upbringing, and not that that stems from being a doormat. 

Topping that, he wants you to be both cultured and witty. Ivan is of the opinion that you have to have a good balance of both - those that are only book smart and not street smart can be painfully entitled and self-righteous. That is something that dives into that sort of idealism that makes Ivan physically ill. He would rather not have a missionary for a spouse - they can be so hard set in their way, no room for budging and certainly no reverse gear once they start to escalate. And they are certainly of the sort that will always place any blame on him. Street smart because he would love it if you can give your own input on social situations, and relieve some of the burden from him. So that he doesn’t have to guide you through interactions, and doesn’t have to clean up any mistakes that you make. So that he can let you out of the house without having to worry. But not too street smart please, and not just that - he needs you to be able to converse on higher topics that gossip and psychology and bread prices. Book smart because it often means cultured and he wants somebody that he can share his passions with - going to the theatre, reading books on stormy nights, going on long walks and appreciating nature. 

Related to that in a way, he would loath it if you are lazy. Participate in some sort of sport, preferably of the sort that isn’t of the team variant and allows you to shine on your own. Figure skating, fencing, chess, swimming … either one, maybe even all of it. Mind and body are connected so ensuring you have a healthy body through physical exertion should help prevent your mind spiralling down to insanity while at his mercy. Be the sort that doesn't procrastinate on chores and puts effort in running a good household. 

Additionally, Russia likes people that are ambitious, be it in the practical sense of building and acting, or in the manner that poets and philosophers are. Have more intentions than to just stare at a screen and give out money. Have passion, dare to dream and crave more than what you have. Life in the weather extremes of his domain don't favour those without fire in their souls, and steel in their spines. Sink or swim, and if you don't have the discipline to cling to your dreams and not give up, then you won't survive him.

Though, don't forget him amidst all your calls and desires. He wants you to care for him, to sooth his paranoia and worries. Run him hot baths and cook the meals. Come New Year's lay all the homemade biscuits and cakes and salads on the table for a feast. Be family to him and he'll be family to him. Be caring and affectionate and playful (but carefully so) behind closed doors and stoic and proper in public.

Faded - Would they let go of you in any way?

Maybe, when engaging in his favourite pastime of existential dread, he would come to the conclusion that he isn't good for you; he would let you go or even deliver you to your preferred person. At times, the self-hatred does come to the fore, and makes him conclude that the wisest course of action is the one he detests the most. 

Aside from that he has dreams that are bigger than his relationship with you. If you were to threaten his dreams of empire and the securities tied with it, then he would choose his dreams over you. While he would die for you (given that he will revive) he would never sacrifice himself for you. 

Or, you could evolve into the sort of person that he detests. Of course, he would attempt to take control over the wheel and righting the course, but a lost cause is a lost cause. He would reluctantly let you go and cherish the memories he has. Though he'll do everything in his power to avoid such a scenario.

Punishment - How would they proceed if you do something they disapprove of?

This is the case where he doesn't really pull any punches - though he wouldn't beat you. That is something he considers himself above and besides, common punches and kicks wouldn't even teach a dog right from wrong, so how would such methods be suited for his partner. 

Ivan views punishments as a form of re-education and it would be useless if he doesn't make it clear what lesson he is trying to impart, or if you don't learn it over the course of your chastisement. Besides, he doesn't see you as his enemy or an unruly subordinate, so why should he treat you as such? 

Thus you'll usually receive a long lecture on your misdoings - what exactly was wrong, why and how he will deal with it. And then the actual correctional actions would commence. 

In winter, he may leave you out in the cold for a few minutes, stripped of your clothing until you develop hyperthermia. Then you are forced to lay your life and wellbeing in his hands as he nurses you back to health. Besides, isn't it so romantic to have somebody save you from death's door?

In the warmer months, he would tie your hands and feet to weights and anchor you to the shoreline of a river or lake. You would be up to the chest or hips in water and he'll have you wearing either something short-sleeved or just leave you there in your underwear. That way, you would be at the mercy of the mosquitoes and insects and the creatures in the water. And at risk of getting a nasty sunburn, if you are prone to it. He would leave you for hours out there, so don't think it would be a walk in the park. If he is feeling particularly provocative, then he'll start a BBQ or do some fishing. And no, you're not getting anything to eat or drink. If you end up getting sick from drinking the water you're standing in, or eating some water plant, then he'll pump out your stomach. 

Of course there are other punishments, all along the vein of the carrot and the stick. Ivan will give you your own room during the first few years, and have it fitted to your tastes. Though, you'll only be allowed to have these if you behave yourself. The same goes for good food and beverages other than water. Should you start rebelling, then he'll start stripping away the luxuries that he has given you until only the basic necessities remain. People have had to survive on less than overcooked food and plain water, so you will just be fine. 

And don't presume that you can argue that you'll only give him respect if he shows you respect in the first place. While at his mercy, you're on the shorter end of the stick, powerless in relation to him, so you'll have to make careful and very good arguments. Also, don't even try to play at being a fixer-upper. He is not some broken clock that needs repairing, so don't try to "fix" him. Attempting to do so will push him very close to wringing your neck as one would a turkey on Christmas.

Though, above all, this isn't a poker game where he'll take bluffs and slights of hand and hollow promises with a mere scowl and some harsh words. Play him for a fool, make promises you have no intention of keeping, prove yourself to be utterly untrustworthy, then he'll make you feel sorry. Either, it will be solitary confinement for a week or two, or he'll dump you in the middle of nowhere, weeks away from any other human being. Perhaps he'll have to confine you to a sick bed afterwards. 

Reaction - How would they react to you escaping?

His first reaction is anger, though not of the screaming and breaking things. Rather, it is that ice cold anger that makes his blood freeze and his mind razor sharp in its focus. There is part of this wrath that is due to the disrespect you show him through running away. A good relationship relies on good communication, so why did you have to run away? Why didn't you just talk about your problems with him? Why do I have to behave like a sugar-addled brat? Perhaps he should lay you over his knee, and give you a good hiding. 

The other side to this coin is anger born out of worry. In terms of chinks in his armour, you can be considered one, and Ivan know of a great many people that would ruthlessly exploit it. And those people would care about honour, propriety or even so-called rights, not when ignoring that can get them what they want. Aside from that, you are so fragile and helpless compared to him - just how can you hope to survive the big, bad world out there? But don't worry, he knows how you feel, having been in a similar position a few times, so he'll be quick to come to the rescue.

Should it be possible, Russia will endeavour to retrieve you without the help. It is a private matter after all, and he does feel some second-hand embarrassment due to your antics. In the case he does involve some agents or other people, he'll be as vague about the true nature of your relationship. Just don't think that you can really use this against him - it will end up harming you more than him. 

However, there could be a scenario where he would even anticipate and hunger for this. A mind game, perhaps, one designed to break your hope of escaping and flaunting his power and skill to you. In his bid to make a lasting impression on you, he is willing to declare open season on you. If he is feeling particularly vindictive, he'll draw all of this out, play with you, like a leopard toying with a baby impala before ultimately killing and eating it. Beware, for he can empathise and think like you, and thus deduce your movements and ultimately track you down. You are the prey and he is the hunter and he is willing to let you think you have the upper hand, only to crush those fantasies underfoot when the time is right. 

Turnabout - Scenario: You have the upper hand? What would be different from their usual MO? 

He isn't the sort to take defeat lying down, given since past events have taught that that only leads to subjugation and misery. Each time he could think about giving up, about surrendering even just a fraction of the control that he has over himself, all the times he did so before flash before his eyes, especially the 90s of the past century, of Alfred imposing his shock therapy on him and the apocalyptic circumstances it spawned. All because he was naive enough to believe an enemy would show him mercy. Why should you be any different? So if he has to go down, then you'll go down with him - he burn the cities, salt the fields and flood the mines. If he has to die, then you can ride to hell with him. 

If it doesn't come to that, if the turn of events is born due to betrayal and false expectations, then he'll proceed slowly. Gradually he'll undermine your actions, or at least nudge the course of events to suit his needs. His goals don't have to be diametrically opposed to yours, or seem like things worthy of your attention. If you are ignorant in some category, then he won't hesitate to use it against you. He does intend on repaying you for everything you've inflicted upon him, and that with interest, compound interest if you are not cautious. 

Should you be kind and considerate, he'll be more open to such an arrangement, as long as you pay a lot of attention to him. Ivan will still find ways to influence you, and while things will be quiet for a while, it will eventuell end like the events described above in the second paragraph. He'll make it clear to you that it is nothing personal and just business. 

Vengeance - What would they do in the face of competition? 

Quiet like a tiger would act if somebody steals/tries to steal his meat. At first, he is content with threats and displays of powers, puffing himself up in order to appear bigger. Cold expressions and even colder words towards any other potential suitors. Commonly, he carries himself with such authority and purpose that he scares away most of those that stand in his way. 

If that is not enough, he might send some boys to knock the opponent around a bit. Or maybe stick out a leg at work to trip the other. A small message, a swipe with his claws - back off. Just a tiny incident to show the concurrence that he is serious. 

But if that isn't enough, then matters get dark. Perhaps the other has his reputation ruined, with illicit material of that person posted online. Maybe he'll warn everybody to stay away from that person, a recipe for insanity. Or if the man/woman dares hurt you, or worse, then that person will end up chopped up and rendered to pig food. Anything to keep you safe, after all.

Art is not mine: from Irina Vinnik and other artists

Info an the Yandere Character Sheets

[skiniibuniii]

ed holiday survival guide

what to bring:

all of this should fit, with extra space, in a large purse. a backpack also works if you need more space.

3 cans of diet soda, 2 of your usual and 1 special one you dont normally buy. if youre sleeping over, take 3-4 of your usual. save the special one for dinner to help you avoid eating.

2 bottles of your favorite water, 3 if youre sleeping over.

of course, a low cal snack like a granola bar in case you feel like youre going to faint. you dont wanna pass out in front of all those people and family members you barely know! bring 2-3 if youre sleeping over or get faint easily.

a few cans of of your favorite energy drink, however many you need to seem alive and well. im taking 4. if you dont like energy drinks, you better hope they have a Keurig or you can get to a starbucks.

napkins or paper towels and a plastic bag. if you can get away with having your purse at the table, line a pocket with a plastic bag. then use your napkin to dispose of your unwanted food into the bag. this can also work with a hoodie pocket, but its riskier. at the end of the dinner, zip up the bag and now it wont get you all gross while you wait for a chance to throw it away.

obvy your phone to sneak under the table and post updates on tumblr.

dont bring any money or cards, unless you need your ID or to buy starbucks or something. in that case, bring only your ID and the exact amount you need for your starbucks.

tips:

dont purge. theyll probably hear you. just avoid eating, and if you really need to, have a metab day beforehand so you do not eat/binge. you dont know what kind of calories are in all that food

choose the lowest cal option available, obvy. your best bet is salad or plain vegetables. if those arent an option, go for turkey, as long as it isnt sitting in a pool of liquid. if that isnt an option, just eat cranberry sauce. fr.

make sure you get a tiny portion of whatever youre eating. like, the total food on your plate should be no bigger than the size of your fist, just in case your lose control and start actually eating. you dont want to ask for more! ew.

make sure you do the classic of chewing constantly. take tiny bites and just do not stop chewing.

popping in a secret piece of gum can help with the last tip a lot esp if its mint. cuz then the food will taste weird if you do decide to eat.

unless its something like salad or cranberry sauce from a can, account for at least 2tbsp of butter when youre calculating your cals.

if you cant estimate the calories in a way you find satisfying, ask for the recipe. calculate the calories, and if you had guessed under initially, make sure you add that same amount of cals to everything else you have to calculate. its probably the sneaky butter messing you up anyway.

best outfit: shirt that shows off your body, an oversized hoodie, and slightly baggy pants. do not wear the hoodie at all till just before dinnertime, then put it on to cover up any bloating. that or just wear it the whole time and do not take it off at all.

wear tall shoes! i am very lucky to have platform boots, and i will be wearing them. they'll make you taller, obvy, so even if youre a bigger ana (like me), youll look lankier and more "proportional"

act like youre wiping your mouth, but really youre doin chew and spit into a napkin, ofc! BUT carbs begin digestion in your mouth, meaning you will consume calories if you chew and spit carbs. AVOID ALL CARBS!!

will update if i think of more tips <3

[artzysyam]

TKAHRK Fan-Snippets

Snippets from @xysidhequeen AU. Based on part 12 after Dick felt asleep

"You're older this time. Never thoughts I'd see you grown up, Little Wing..." 

Dick's last words before he succumb to exhaustion reverberated in Jason's mind as his brother lay before him. His legs trembled beneath him and he slumped down, pressing his forehead against Dick's chest. He could feel the faint thud of his brother's heartbeat, and hear the shallow breaths entering his lungs. 

His fault

He abandoned him

He hurt him

Danny stepped forward, tenderly placing a hand on Jason's burly shoulder. "Jay...," he said, gently pulling him out from his own thoughts, which had nearly swallowed him up.

"I..." Jason said weakly, glancing at Danny for help. "I can't leave him again, Danny. I-I can't." His voice quivered as feelings of deep protectiveness overwhelmed him, threatening to drown him in despair and guilt for leaving Dick once already.

A sad smile spread across Danny's face as he knelt down next to Jason, wrapping his long arms around the younger man's shoulders. "Then we won't. He's your brother Jason, that makes him family." Jason felt the dam break as hot tears streamed down his cheeks, never seeming to stop until Danny held him close and spoke gentle words of comfort.

Jason sobbed for the little Robin who died too soon, for the boy he could've been, for the man he was now. He cried for the hero who he looked up to, full of light and life. And for the broken shell left behind. He cried for a brother he never knew he cared so deeply for him.

Joker took me away from him

Batman never saves me

Batman replaced me

Batman saw me as a tool

His mind spiralling again but Danny managed to ground him by his core humming the wave an aura of comfort, safety and reassurance that he's no alone and he always will be here by his side.

As tears subsided, Jason pulled his head away and scanned the manifestation of his brother's grief and depression.

"What do you want to do now, Jaybird?" Danny asked, leaning back and looking at Jason with a patient smile, ready and willing to follow him to hell and back. His heart and core filled with the gentle warmth to his body.

"First," Jason wiping the remnants of tears and snot from his face. "We need to clean up this pig's den." Danny nodded, looking around.

“And then?” Danny asked, not pressing and ever patient. Jason then looked at the bundles of takeout containers and pizza boxes with the sentient molds ready to takeover this apartment. He assumed Dick don't have energy to buy groceries and he knew Dick can't cook for shit even cause the water to burn fire for Ancient's sake at one point.

“Then we make sure Dick eats some real Ancient’s damned food.” Jason groused as he stood, moving towards the take out containers that had definitely reached biohazard status, with his fire, and disposed their carcasses into the trash bag.

“I’ll let Sam and Tucker know we won’t be back tonight.” Danny said brightly, but his voice had a trace of pride in it that Jason wouldn’t admit, even on pain of death, filled him with warmth to rival his flame core.

“You don’t have to stay, or help. It’s not your fucking problem.” Jason grumbled as he rifled through Dick’s cabinets for a trash bag or ten. Thank Ancients his brother bought cleaning supplies or he will have a talk when he wakes up.

But, he don't want to burden Danny of his problem, it's his fault after all and he wants to fix it, he have to.

“I don’t have to, no. But I want to. Because it’s you, Jay.” Danny said softly, causing Jason paused what he doing and stare at him, agape. There was something more in his tone that he couldn’t interpret, but it sent heat to his cheeks and made his undead heart beat a little quicker.

“I’ll always be there when you need me.” Danny finished with a shrug, skin dusted a light green that somehow made his freckles stand out. Jason would swear he could pick out the constellations Danny so adored scattered across Danny’s skin.

“Thanks, Danny. For. Everything.” Jason stared at the trash bag in his hands, unsure why the air felt too thin, and his heart was beating so fast.

Or. He knew. But it was one of those things he wasn’t willing to examine too closely. Especially not today, not right now. It's too much for him.

“Let’s make sure Nightwing wakes up to the cleanest apartment ever. Courtesy of his very own undead cleaning crew!” Danny cheered, brought Jason back to the present and he felt the mood lighten from the heavy emotion he felt for the past few hours.

“The King and his Red Knight, glorified goddamned maids.” Jason snorted as Danny snickered. He was glad that Danny is here and... and he was thankful for it. Then they set to work cleaning Dick's apartment.

It didn’t fix the pain in his chest, in his core. But every inch of space they cleaned settled something inside of Jason. As if he was finally mending something he hadn’t even realized was broken.

From what Jazz had said plenty of times, one step at a time. 

[koiyan-hades-kid-with-a-system]

Camp/Underworld Quotes #6

Koiyan, making exotic wines and meads: Be the wine experimenter they said. It'll be fun they said.

Cory, helping them bottle the wines: Wtf is a star fruit?

Koiyan, done with their pale white ass not knowing 90% of the exotic fruits they know: Questions later, bottling now.

-

Dionysus, seeing Koiyan make wines with ease: ...Are you sure you're not my child?

Koiyan, making rice wine on the roof: It's just the Vietnamese in me.

-

Other kids, getting wasted easily, looking at Koiyan: How come you're not a Dionysus kid and not drunk at this point?

Koiyan, been drinking since she was 2 years old: Experience

Other kids: How?

Koiyan: Vietnam has no legal drinking age. Kids start drinking usually at 10-12 there. My mortal step-father did.

-

Cory: Why rice wine?

Koiyan, taste testing the rice wine: It's what my area of Vietnam is known for.

-

Koiyan: When I die I want Cory to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time.

-

Zagreus: I'm gonna get my pilot's license. I've already got a driver's license and a cosmetology license, that's two of the big five licenses.

Koiyan: The big five licenses?

Zagreus: Driver's license, cosmetology license, pilot's license, fishing license, and… license to kill! I can't wait to get that one.

-

Zagreus, helping Thanatos dispose the bodies Koiyan made: You stole my Adamant Rail for this.

Koiyan: The alters wanted violence and Ares told us to help with the war.

-

Zagreus: What state do you live in?

Thanatos: Constant anxiety.

Cory: Denial.

Koiyan: Perfection.

Cyrilla, pointing to all of the camp: NEW YORK! WE'RE ALL IN NEW YORK LONG ISLAND.

-

Koiyan: I’ve become a bread crumb dealer to four crows at the lake. They pay me with a bit of everything. Like shiny things, fabric, or pens. But recently they paid me with a 20 dollar bill they found somewhere. So I decided to buy them some more expensive bread. They loved it. So they understand what to do. Give me money. I’ve probably racked up about 200 dollars at this point. Is it morally wrong though, I mean. They’re the ones who steal the money from others. Or perhaps they just have a big pile laying somewhere. Should I keep on doing this?

Cory: You sound like the start of a Batman villain.

Koiyan, now being flocked by crows: More like the crazy bird lady from Home Alone 2

-

Koiyan: I think you're still suffering the effects of your party last night.

Nico: All I drank was Redbull!

Koiyan: How many?

Nico: Eighteen.

Koiyan: I'm getting Will-

-

Cyrilla: Whose turn is it to give the pep-talk before capture the flag?

Koiyan: *sighing* Zagreus.

Zagreus, now hanging around camp and is now a camp counselor: Fuck shit up out there, but don’t die.

Cory: *wiping away a tear* So inspirational.

-

Cyrilla: *is hugging Koiyan*

Thanatos: Hey! It's my turn to hug Koiyan!

Thanatos: *grabs Koiyan*

Zagreus: *kicking down the door* What do you mean, "yOuR tUrN"? We agreed now is my time slot!

Cyrilla: No, It's still my turn!

Koiyan: *suffocating* Guys, I love you, but just because I'm the smallest doesn't mean you can be hugging me constantly!

Thanatos: But we need the moral support!

Cyrilla: And you're small! Which is cute!

Zagreus: If I don't hug you right now I think the depression will kick in and my body will stop functioning.

Koiyan: *close to tears* Well- I, I guess.

-

Koiyan, at the slightest provocation: I came into this earth screaming and covered in someone else's blood and and I'm not afraid to leave the same way.

Zagreus, knowing its her cycle: Want chocolate?

Koiyan, about to cry: Yes please.

-

Koiyan: *Plays Slender: The Eight Pages*

*Jumpscare*

Koiyan, the only Asian in the group: *Jumps back* OH SHIT, IT'S A WHITE GUY!!!

Cyrilla: Do you mean me?

Koiyan: Not this time

-

Koiyan, to Cory: You're starting to forget your Spanish. You don't practice.

Cory: Lo siento. Estoy embarazada.

Koiyan: You just told me you're pregnant.

Thanatos: Congratulations Cory, you're glowing!

Cyrilla: Who's the unlucky guy?

Koiyan: Estoy rodeado de idiotas (I am surrounded by idiots)

-

Cory: Where's Zagreus?

Koiyan: Don't worry, I'll find them.

Koiyan, shouting: Thanatos sucks!

Zagreus, distantly: Thanatos is the best person ever! Fuck you!

Koiyan: Found them.

Thanatos, tearing up: Babe...

[breannasfluff]

Wild turns back to the path ahead just as his foot meets open air. For a split second, he’s frozen somewhere between surprise and horror before his foot continues down, down, down and he tips directly into a pond.

His squeal of surprise is cut off as he faceplants the water, sinking with the momentum of his sprint. It’s not deep; the sunlight cutting through the trees shows weeds growing on the bottom. A fish darts away in a flicker of motion. While it’s deep enough for him to sink, he can easily push off the bottom and rise to the surface.

There’s a multitude of differences that he catalogs between one blink and the next. It’s just a pond in the woods, like the ones he’s swum in plenty of times.

Yet something about the situation; the adrenalin of the run, the earlier exhaustion, or perhaps just the surprise wipes away every mundane detail.

Wild isn’t playing chase with Wolfie and falling into a pond, he’s in the Shrine again.

The water is clear and it covers his head, flooding his throat. He chokes on it but someone is yelling at him to breathe. He can’t, though, it’s liquid. Don’t they know he’ll drown? Someone pulls at him—or pushes him deeper.

His legs, his side, his arm, his face. All of it burns. More than burns. There’s acid eating away at his flesh and he can feel it sinking through layers of muscle, intent on consuming his bones.

Before, protecting Zelda, the adrenaline covered it all. He just—kept going because he had to. It was his duty and he needed to protect the princess. The Guardians existed only to be cut down; to deflect bolts with his shield. To take the hits when he couldn’t deflect them.

Zelda’s screams still echo in his ears, yanking at him as she tries to get him to leave. But he can’t leave her to face these monsters alone. Link drew the Master Sword, so his duty is to save Hyrule. The princess deserves to live a life free of training and prayers. She should be at home with her research and books, working alongside Purah. She should be buying dresses and putting ribbons in her hair, giggling with girls her age. Zelda should be doing whatever teenage girls wanted to do. Not trying to save an entire kingdom.

She didn’t ask for this burden, just as Link never asked to become her knight. Or draw the sword. Or train from a young age. All of it—none of it—

This isn’t the future he dreamed of.

If nothing else, he’ll make sure Zelda lives. He is disposable; someone else can pull the Master Sword if needed. But divine power from Hylia? She is their only chance.

So Link ignores the blasts from the Guardians that fill the air with the scent of cooking meat. The wounds are cauterized immediately, so he won’t bleed to death. Pain is a far-off entity. He watches it fly by like a puffseed on the wind; noting it and discarding it.

Keep going. Running, tripping, falling. Pushing Zelda up again while she sobs. Grabbing her when she trips and throwing himself between her and the ground—between her and the malice.

She screams, but she’s not hurt. He’s the one who landed on the brunt of it. It’s on his face and he wipes distractedly. He needs to keep his eyes clear if nothing else. So much for good looks, comes the wry thought.

Link knows, at some level, that his body won’t be able to keep up with the abuse it’s taking. It just keeps him pushing forward faster. Harder. If he can just get Zelda to Hateno—or at least the fort. Somewhere others can help protect her. Somewhere safe.

“Link! Link!” Zelda’s voice wobbles in and out of hearing. He flicks an ear, but it doesn’t move right. It only makes her sob harder.

“Keep going,” he grits out. His throat is raw, but he’s gripping the Master Sword too hard to sign. When she doesn’t move he jerks toward her, uncoordinated. “Go!”

Zelda runs. Link follows.

It’s too late and the Guardians are descending upon them. He’s taken too many hits and the body he knew was fading refuses to respond. If he can just—stand. Push himself in front of Zelda again; death a few seconds faster is worth it if he saves her.

Just—a few steps.

Why…why is the earth tilting? Oh…did he fall over?

Well, that’s okay. He can just. Get back up. He always gets back up. Yet his legs won’t respond; his vision is graying out. Darkness eats away at the scene and he struggles hard. He has to save Zelda!

Through slitted eyes, he sees her step forward—fearless, strong, and oh-so brave. Then his view is cut off as his eyes slide shut without his volition.

There’s sound—

Noise—

Nothing.

Read the rest here!

[mxmorbidmidnight]

Tourettes/tics survival kit

Items that can be helpful to have around to help with tics.

• GLOVES: the type of gloves you use will depend on the tics you experience. I use gloves that cover my nails because my tics make me scratch myself. I’ve heard padded gloves such as boxing gloves can be good for hitting tics

•headphones/noise control: my tics tend to be heavily triggered by noise, headphones can help block out noise. I suggest loops as they are able to stay in place when I have tic attacks where I’m forced to thrash my head around. Plus they’re discreet and small, can be carried in your pocket or bag.

•wipes: unpleasant textures such as stickiness can trigger my tics, I carry wipes or sanitiser to help with this.

• fidgets: I like to carry at least one fidget that is strong enough for me to be forceful with. Eg, punch, throw, squeeze, hit. This can help relieve tension and redirect self harming tics. I will also carry some kind of “fiddly” fidget that I can distract myself with or move around really quickly

•something to throw: if your tics make you throw things it can be helpful to carry around something that can be safely thrown such as a beanbag or other small item

•lidded/unspillable cups: these can help when tics make it difficult to hold drinks. It can help to have a drink bottle with a straw opening to prevent spills rather than one of those ones with the open hole to drink out of.

•plastic utensils and plates: when my tics are bad they can make me throw stuff around and hit myself with things, so having soft utensils that aren’t made out of something that can do me harm as well as plates that won’t break is incredibly help. For this you can buy camping plates and cutlery, disposable plastic or paper cups and utensils or kids plastic cutlery.

•pillow: soft objects such as pillows can prevent you from hitting against surfaces such as tables or walls. When I was hospitalised for my tics the nurses put some towels under my shirt to prevent my tics from making me hit my chest. Additionally a pillow can be hit or squeezed.

• Hair ties: sometimes my hair can make my tics worse due to sensory issues. It can be helpful o carry things around that can help with sensory distress.

• first aid: tic attacks can result in injury. It can be helpful to carry stuff like bandaids or Panadol to help with pain following an attack.

•water+food: tic attacks can be incredibly draining, therefore having quick access to food and water can be good. Eg, if keeping a bottle of water and some snacks next to your bed or in your bag. It’s great to have this stuff in close reach, if you can’t get up or are sepceially exhausted after a tic attack.

•medical indication: items such as sunflower lanyards can be helpful for indicating an invisible disability such as tics. Additionally in case of emergency, identification and medical information can be kept on standby. People can also use badges or similar items to indicate they have tics, this is an option if it makes you more comfortable for people to be aware of your tics. You can also carry a small card (or multiple cards to handout) that explains Tourettes, this can be helpful when faced with negative reactions or when you are unable to voice your medical conditions. Schools can provide time out passes to get out of class when tics get bad or other identification that can be used to alert teachers of needs.

[vinylopa]

What if Husk pours out Mimzy's soul?? (even though he hates her, she gives good advice)

(English is not my native language, sorry for the mistakes)

part 1

M: well? Are you two lovebirds supposedly dating or something?

This is the first thing the short blonde asked when she was left alone with Husk. Alastor was showing the hotel to Lucifer, and Angel suddenly had business to do.

X: what are you talking about?

The gloomy cat wiped the glasses and tried not to pay attention to Mimzy, but even after such a question his ear twitched irritably.

M: well, you and that slut Angel, I see the way you look at him, I know that look, and I’ve never seen such a look from you

Woman grins and takes a sip of her whiskey

H: Nothing like that! And don't you fucking dare call him that, you bitch

Now the blonde laughed even louder

M: and you say that there is nothing between you?? God, you're a fucking liar, you flea.

You don't have anyone to talk to anyway, so I'm at your disposal.

X: no.

He responded sharply and rudely, immediately making it clear that he would not continue the dialogue

M: You don’t even know how to approach him and I see it.

The man looked at Mimzy incredulously and even thought a little... what will happen if he still tells... maybe this feeling that weighs on him will go away??

X: I don’t think he notices my sympathy, and I’m not particularly good at showing it.. you know, I’m not an expert in this

Mimzy rolls his eyes and takes another sip of alcohol.

M: So your sympathy for each other is obvious to everyone except yourself? God, I thought Charlie was the dumbest here

X: stop it, since you wanted to give advice, don’t fuck off!

Husk growls and puts down his glass with a knock

M: God, flea-beard, a bouquet of flowers will be enough for him to understand that he cares about you, so stop squeezing your tits and go buy a bouquet

X: I don’t think it’s that simple, he’s not like...

But the man didn’t even have time to finish

M: stop looking for excuses, go and act or someone more determined will steal your princess

......

But no one will take Angel anymore, he heard the entire conversation between Husk and Mimzy and damn it, for the first time in his life he felt butterflies in his stomach.

He, too, was head over heels in love, but he was so afraid to show real courtship, because he wasn’t sure whether the cat had just become friendly or whether it was something more...

part 2:

[answersfromzestual]

For those of you on hormones replacement treatment (HRT) Testosterone;

a shaving kit makes a great and natural way to store and travel (where legal) with your testosterone. Going to a friend's house? Bam, it's natural to have a shaving kit. Or I found emptying out the hard case of a set of old hair clippers. If you carry needles and you are stowing your needles, I recommend using a hard case of some sort. I've had the airline break my syringes/ needles before, and when you have to ask a pharmacy that doesn't know, they may be hesitant to give you any needles without knowing the medication you are on.

Do research on where you are going if leaving the country, make sure you have what you need (if you can) to be able to have legal possession in that country and any other country where you may stop or another potential area to explore.

Keep yourself safe, it's always good to keep a note from the doctor and your prescription history.

If you, for some reason do no longer have your testosterone, missing a dose or two will not cause any issues (I was told this by my family doctor).

Also, it's a good idea to perhaps take your vial and put it safely in a carry-on. They will not let you take your syringes (if they have needles attached, they will not let these on your carry-on).

It's good to have a hard case for long distance travels, otherwise a shaving bag works well. Find a more padded one if you can, and that closes securely.

I like to keep all my things together (Needles, testosterone, alcohol/alcohol wipes, and cotton balls/pads.) So that if you ever need to leave in a hurry you have to only go to one place and grab one thing.

I try to buy syringes with needles by the box. They cost me about $0.25 each and I get 100 in a box, all for $25.

It is also important to get a proper sharps disposal. You can usually ask the pharmacy and they will give you one. (In Canada I believe they are free).

About injection,

Unless instructed how to properly by a health care professional, I would not use your thigh for intermuscular injection. A great place, and the least painful I have found is in your gluteal muscles. It is important to rotate injection sites/sides. Give the muscles a break, especially if you need a dose weekly like I do.

Try to get air out before injection

Make sure you pull back the plunger to make sure you do not inject into a vein. If you pull the plunger and you see blood, do not inject. Find another location.

Do not use a needle more than once if possible (during a single injection, you can use attempt a few times), try to get it right the first poke, and it will hurt less.

The more a needle is used, the more it actually starts to spur at the tip, which means it's going to be harder to poke yourself, and it can be more painful

Do not share needles

Dispose of your needles properly by using a sharps container. Return it to the pharmacy when finished and they should give you a free exchange for a new one.

Do not throw needles out in the trash even with the cap on it can still be dangerous. I've personally seen (had) a needle peirce through the cap, have gotten stabbed.

Try to minimize air bubbles in the needle. But if you are scared of air bubbles. My cousin is a nurse practitioner, and she told me that it takes a lot more air than that empty syringe can hold to cause an embolism. But it is still important to minimize bubbles just to be easier on your body and help better absorption. So, a couple of tiny little bubbles are okay.

Make sure you are using a sterile area to place your things.

Make sure your hands are clean and sanitized.

Afterwards, press and slightly massage the injection site for at least 1 minute to help the testosterone absorb and to stop the bleeding.

The rule of thumb if you ever forget where to inject into your butox, upper and outer area of your gluteal muscle (so upper and outer buttcheeck).

Before you poke yourself, I find it helpful to press with your finger/alcohol pad and find a nice area, I usually do it as I apply the alcohol to sterilize the area. I find it helps me get it right the first time.

Any other questions? Let me know!

Do not inject yourself unless you have been properly taught how.

Do not fool around with your dose, more is NOT better

It may take a few years to fall into the safe/average hormone levels areas or what arrangement you have discussed with your prescribing physician.

Be careful! I am not a physican, always listen to the professional and be safe!

Stay Golden

✌️ 💙 💜

[gladoswantscake]

Late Night Storm - Goro Majima x F!Reader

Summary: You were finally able to clock out for the night and head home to relax after a long shift, but there's one problem.

Warnings: None

Available on Wattpad and AO3

It was late at night when you finished your shift. The rain was coming down hard as you stepped outside. The cold wind was blowing very harsh, and the thin material of your coat provided very little protection from the frigid rain in January.

"Damnit..." You realize you left umbrella at home while you were in a hurry to get to work on time.

The only two options were to book it to the nearest Poppo and pray that you don't end up soaking wet from the bad weather or stay and possibly draw unwanted attention from the drunk men that stalk the streets.

You raise the small purse above your head and made a run for it.

In the distance, a Poppo store lit up brightly in the dark stormy night. You ran as fast as you could with whatever breath you had left in you and damning your high heels for slowing you down making you no longer dry.

Majima was finishing up his cigarette when he spots you running past him without a glance. Majima was in the same situation as you and the Poppo store was the only place that could provide him some temporary shelter. He takes one last drag from his bud and disposes it before walking back inside.

The sliding doors opening followed by a chime made the clerk perk his head out from one of the aisles.

"The rain still isn't letting up, huh?" The clerk notices Majima enters and returns to his nightly stocking routine.

"Not anytime soon." Majima shoves his hands in his pockets and watches the clerk restock the last couple of shelves.

Majima had been a local in the location for a while. It took some time for the clerk to warm up to Majima's personality. The clerk enjoyed his company due to it being so dead at night. It was better than dealing with aggressive drunks. He was only there to make some money and in the morning he was attending college classes. If the clerk ever told his parents about the new friend he's made, they'd be exasperated.

The clerk stands up to wipe off the dust from his knees. "It's a shame we don't have any umbrellas here to buy." He returns to his register. "I'll ask my boss if we can get some in here."

Majima leans against the counter of the register. His eyes lingering to find where you disappeared off to.

Suddenly, on the other side of the store a door opens followed by clicking sounds of high heels echoing through the quiet store, then you appeared in Majima's view. He could see how bad your condition was: Sopping wet clothes, matted hair, and smeared makeup.

Majima and the clerk took pity for your appearance. They both watch as you stride across the store, your arms tightly hugging yourself.

You stop in your tracks as you felt eyes staring at you from a distance. You glance in their direction and a blush appears on your face from the embarrassment. The two men quickly look away to allow you to go on about your business.

"I bet she'll be an icicle by the time she gets home." The clerk mumbles to Majima.

"She ain't got nothin' but sopping clothes to cover herself." Majima eyes her attire.

Your dress was long and once gave a flowy look that reach your ankles with matching high heels and a coat. It would have been more appealing if the fabric of the dress and coat wasn't drenched and clinging onto your skin for dear life.

The clerk takes notice of Majima gawking at your frail form. He's never seen this side of Majima before. Then a grin appears on his face.

"Go talk to her."

Majima looks at the clerk with his wide eye. He was unsure how he would be able to put your stress at ease when he has nothing to offer to you.

"I'm sure she could use some company." The clerk gestures.

Majima watches you hugging yourself close to try to bring yourself any bit of warmth you had left. Thunder roars loudly along with lightning illuminating the dark sky for a couple for seconds. You let out a quiet whimper and pleading to yourself for the rain to stop.

Now was his chance to try to distract you from your foul mood. He slowly begins to approach you.

His footsteps growing louder which causes you to turn and look up at the man.

"H-Hello." You tremble.

Majima replied to you with a warm smile to uplift your mood. Even with your messy appearance he still found you cute looking.

You looked tired as if you worked a twelve-hour shift and the dark circles stood out a lot more due to your skin being pale.

"I see you're in the same situation as me... Just less wet."

Majima chuckles. "Yeah." He crosses his arms. "Looks like ya got caught by the rain at really a bad time."

He gazes your late-night attire. He found it endearing and sympathetic at the same time, however he understood how uncomfortable you felt in your wet clothes. However, the way your dress clung to your body showing every curve on you made his heart skip a beat, and the faint smell of your perfume captivates him in a trance.

"I didn't think I still looked good after being drenched."

Majiama quickly catches himself staring at you longer than usual and clears his throat.

"Heh, sorry about that." He scratches the back of his neck. "Can't help it when I'm lookin' at something that's so eye catching."

"Oh well thank you for that. I'm surprised that I can still pull my outfit off even when I'm soaked."

"Thought ya needed some admiration to lighten the mood 'cause it looks like yer not having a great night."

"Pretty much." You shrug your shoulders. "I left my umbrella at home." You turn back to the window.

"That's a shame. If I had an umbrella, I'd lend ya it."

"That's very thoughtful of you."

Majima could see a smile appear on your face from his act of service comment.

"So, what brings ya out here at this time?"

"One of my co-workers had called out sick so I had to stay a bit longer."

"Work, huh. Are ya a hostess?"

You nod. "I've been one for a while. It's tough work, but it pays well."

"I bet yer one of the most popular gals in the club then."

"I'm getting there slowly but surely." You smile.

The two of you stood in silence watching the rain fall. As you were fixated on the droplets of rain, Majima would steal glances from you. He liked the way you were comfortable with his presence. Not feeling intimidated by him by the slightest. He was already daydreaming about the two of you being together. Despite his bad experience of being in a relationship in the past, you were capable of to have him entertain the thought of trying again, but with you.

Finally, after a while, the heavy rain turns into a light sprinkle.

"About damn time." You mumble. "I wouldn't be surprised if I woke up with a cold in the morning."

Majima felt a bit sad now the rain had calm down. He was enjoying your company and now you were about to head home.

"Thank you for keeping me company, um..."

"Goro Majima." He grins. "You'll be alright walking home all by yerself?"

You nod. "My home is just a couple of blocks down, so I'll be alright." You reach down into your purse and pull out a business card.

"I'd like to get to know you better, Majima-san."

Majima takes the card from your hand. It was a hostess card with your name and location of the club you work at.

"I'd love that." Majima says in a flirtatious tone. "I'll stop by soon."

You reply with a smile before exiting the store. Majima watches you until you disappear from his sight. He could feel butterflies in his stomach just thinking about the next time he meets you. It was a feeling he's never felt in a long time.

"Looks like you got lucky." The clerk's voice pulls Majima back into reality. "I'm surprised she wasn't intimidated by you."

"What makes ya say that?" Majima side glances back at the clerk.

The clerk raises both of his hands to surrender. "N-Not that you're a bad person or anything!"

Majima chuckles. "I know whatcha' mean." He walks back to the clerk, leaning on the register counter with his elbow to support him. "Am I that intimidating?"

"Well…" The clerk nervously grins. "The first time you walked in here you had a bat."

He remembered the poor look on the clerk's face when they met for the first time. The clerk was working one late night shift when Majima and a few of his men stepped foot in the store. The first thoughts were either he was going to be robbed or kidnapped, but as soon as Majima cracked a joke about the clerk' being so timid it eased the tension of the environment.

"So, when do you think you'll visit her?" The clerk leans over to get a better look at the business card.

Majima already grinning to himself at the thought of their late-night conversation hopefully blossoming into something more. He was eager to see you again.

"I'll stop by this week and maybe take her out for dinner after work. Besides," Majima slips the card in his pocket and turns his head to the clerk. "A fine gal like her shouldn't be walking home all by herself."

"I'm sure she will enjoy your company." The clerk chirps.

Majima smiles at the clerk's comment.