#and boy howdy do I have things to say
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
The Veilguard Post
I have a lot of thoughts about the new Dragon Age game.
Spoilers for all games and critical analysis below (and I do mean critical I have some nice things to say and some really not nice things to say) if you’re not here for that kind of content then keep scrolling….
Alright now that we’re alone, my beloved, I have some big thoughts about this game.
First, let me introduce myself as a Dragon Age player. Years ago I started trying to play Inquisition because I wanted to play my first real big kid game (I was like… 15 I think) but I was very lost so I went to my brother who gave me Origins and his copy of DA2 and told me to ask him if I had any questions.
I played over 500 hours of Origins - I played every origin, romanced every companion, played every angle and got every single stinking achievement the game had on offer INCLUDING all of the DLC achievements. I loved the hell out of that game and honestly still believe it is one of the best games I’ve ever played. It taught me how to mod! I love modding my games now and she’s the reason!
I didn’t love DA2 nearly as much but I still enjoyed parts of it. Honestly, if the game had ended after Act 2 I would have probably loved it just as much, I just feel like it doesn’t hold its drama very well at the end and truly if the Anders confrontation had more gravitas to it I would have enjoyed it a lot more. For context, I’ve only played her three times but I did help my sister play through all three games in their entirety. So to be clear I have played through romances for Fenris, Sebastian, and Isabela, and my sister romanced Anders (yes I did watch Merril’s romance so I do know what happens in that one as well).
Inquisition was my pandemic game, I played the hell out of her. I have easily clocked close to a thousand hours in that game between all five playthroughs because I was mentally unwell during the pandemic lol, but I digress. I played that game as much as I could, modded it to high heaven and unplayability frankly. I romanced Cullen, Dorian, Cassandra, Bull, and Solas (if I go back and do another playthrough which is likely at this point, frankly, I’m open to doing Josephine or Blackwall). Trespasser is an all-timer for me, one of the best DLC expansions I have ever seen, I was gagged, gooped, dead and deceased on the FLOOR.
All of this to say, my love for these games runs deep (I have a whole world in mind that I may one day bring myself to fully write but alas… Idk man shit’s hard). I wrote fan fic for this world and I cherish it deeply.
So… Veilguard… honestly, I was expecting it to be worse, I was expecting to hate it. I went in knowing it had been stuck in production hell for 10 years, had cycled through writers and layoffs, you name it, they suffered through it. But while what we got was not terrible… it was not great either.
I will say, I enjoyed some quests and some ideas in there. Here’s a short list:
The siege at Weisshaupt was a treasure, it even made me briefly enjoy gameplay! (I universally play on easy mode but this one felt smart)
Solas being inside of your head when you’re trying to get to Elgar’nan’s arch demon was dope as hell
All of Emmrich’s quest was exceptional, especially the ending was firing on all cylinders. Truly a great quest
When I got Lucanis romance it was pretty stellar (just lacking in content which we’ll get to)
Honestly, having my romanced inquisitor ending was satisfying for me. Really, I was getting the flutters in my heart watching it.
Ok so… now lets get into why you’re really here, the disappointments. In ten parts because I have too much to say apparently.
Let’s start with the art: I know some people love what they did with the art style and I will say I appreciate that they stuck with the style throughout and made the game feel cohesive… I still felt like it was too fortnite cartoon-y for what I prefer in a Dragon Age game.
Second: The companions… I feel like… I feel like this was ‘therap-ize your friends’ the game at times. The amount of times I only responded with ‘I’m sorry’ or ‘you’re allowed to feel that way’ or ‘this is hard’ was so often I genuinely wondered at times if it was the same sound bite being played every time.
I heard someone say that you can’t even be mean in this game and I-... they’re right… you can’t really be mean in this game. I can’t unsee it. And this is coming from someone who played a full evil campaign of Baulder’s Gate 3 and had to play a sixth time to cleanse my soul after being a meanie and feeling dirty about it… I believe being evil and cruel (or at least being a dick) is kind of essential in an RPG and I personally feel like you should be able to disagree with your companions and make them hate you.
I don’t recruit Sera anymore because she bothers me, I don’t love Merril or Fenris and I straight up hate Morrigan (more on this later) and Oghren, and the games before allowed me to be a bitch to them if I wanted to.
In this game I vaguely like my companions but they all feel like ideas and not people. I didn’t like Sera but she felt like a person, so did Merril and Morrigan - they’re people and I don’t like every person. My least favorite companion in this game is Neve and she’s not offensively bad, just a vague idea of a cynical detective who fights the man and doesn’t take anyone’s shit… but beyond that… nothing.
We spend a lot of the companion quests just kind of… walking around and talking to them… but I feel like I don’t actually learn about them. I think that half of my companions avoid this - Davrin, Harding, and Emmrich feel like fully realized characters with passions and history. Their walk and talk quests felt more immersive and like I was genuinely learning about a new friend and I enjoyed it but too few of my companions sucked me in this way.
Bellara constantly talks about how hard things are and how much she misses her brother (and also her romance serials which are my favorite interactions with her). Taash’s mother is the most interesting part about them and their arc is just not very compelling (or tied to basically anything else happening in the game beyond the Dragon King is working with the evanuris but I digress). And Lucanis… dear sweet Lucanis you had so much potential but they stuck you in a predictable story and gave Spite no actual substance. Also apparently Spite is a spirit of determination which I had to find out from Solas at the end of the game… like huh? What? Excuse me? Why wasn’t that explored more? That's a fascinating concept.
Who are these people? They’re just kind of… vaguely awkward, supposedly good at their jobs, and wasted potential.
I think that’s what it comes down to for me. There’s so much potential to have really interesting characters here. If you want me to do a deep dive on how I would re-write these characters let me know maybe I’ll do it lol. This post is already long enough.
Third: Romance full disclosure, I fall into the category of - I want my RPG to also be a dating sim - so this one I get is not everyone’s cup of tea… that having been said the romances in this game are really lacking. Not only are they flat or uninteresting there is practically no content!
I romanced Lucanis and I genuinely mean this - when I did get romantic scenes with him I loved them. They were sweet and tender but so few and far between it didn’t feel earned. I loved the scene after being pulled out of the Fade prison - I replayed it like six times. I felt like it was so sweet and so well executed and I craved more of that.
Watching the other romances it’s clear that this game lacks content for the romances, full stop. Everyone gets a grand total of about half an hour of content for their romance start to finish. And like… huh? Why? Dragon Age is known for its romances! Even the more surface level romances in other games have more going for them!
Sebastian’s romance is easily the weakest romance in any DA game and I think that his romance somehow still has more content that’s actually romantic than any of Veilgaurd’s… and listen I know I’m the rare Sebastian defender but his rival-mance (the superior option imo) requires you to challenge him and his faith. It’s interesting, it’s got substance and grit and is thought provoking… Veilgaurd doesn’t offer that.
I’ve watched all the romances at this point and it seems that - once again - Emmrich has the most content. Davrin and Harding are close behind, but all of them still lack true romance. Half the time the flirtatious option just reads as being nice and there’s so little pay off that arguing these romances are slow burn is dead on arrival in my opinion.
Not to mention that most of the romantic scenes are interrupted by something goofy or awkward. Lucanis, Neve, and Emmrich all have kisses that are interrupted for one reason or another and frankly I didn’t care for it. It felt like padding and I want my romances to be more present.
Fourth: And this one is big for me. Your choices basically don’t matter… like at all.
I need it to be known that my friends and I regularly call big choices in our DnD games ‘Dragon Age choices’ these games are hugely influential in how we run our DnD games. We love a morally gray, ambiguous, ‘things will never be perfect make the choice you can live with’ type of stakes. And this game frankly has none.
There are three big choices in this game - by my count - and none of them have weight or substance. The only companion that has one even remotely close to the other games is Emmrich’s - which I will admit took me all the way the fuck out and I genuinely couldn’t decide if we should resurrect Manfred or let Emmrich become immortal. I was floored by his quest in general.
Anyway, big ‘choices’ in this game are as follows:
Save Minrathous or Treviso
Punch the First Warden or talk him down
Let Harding or Davrin Live
So following my first playthrough I knew I wanted to romance Lucanis so I saved Treviso and I was initially taken aback by how fucked things were in Minrathous… except they’re not really that fucked to be honest. Yes the venatori took over… and yes the Shadow Dragons go into hiding… but you still have access to the dragons and the Viper - even infected with blight - lives throughout the rest of the damn game.
Like… huh? I thought this would be pivotal. In Origins once you leave Lothering you literally cannot return because the blight is beyond devastating. It’s horrific, blight sickness is so horrible that in DA2 you have to kill Aveline’s husband and one of your siblings either dies or becomes a warden, it’s so bad that nothing can be done about it. But the Viper just casually sticks around for the rest of the game and the Shadow Dragons can still help you in the end. Not to mention that either Bellara or Neve can be cured of the blight at the end of the game for some reason…
Can you imagine in Inquisition if you still got to hang out with the Templars after Samson absolutely decimates them? Like… that would simply not happen and I like that each game gets a different minor villain and ending based on your choices, it’s juicy, it’s diabolical, it’s interesting. It inspires further investigation and playthroughs.
I understand that not every choice can matter in a video game because then a game would just be impossible to play and that’s what DnD is for… but BG3 did just fine and they have dozens of choices that really matter (note I have clocked 700 hours in BG3 over 7 playthroughs including evil playthroughs). Within the franchise you have dozens of choices that really matter. Hell in Origins the Redcliff quest has about four different endings at least, depending on how and when you do it. We’re not asking for a lot, we’re asking for what is honestly, at this point, an industry standard for an RPG.
Punching the First Warden or not is such a minor decision all things considered that like… it genuinely baffles me that it’s even a choice at all because even when you knock his ass out cold he still staggers back to the fight and gets pulled into the abyss. Sure, you’ll see him later in Davrin’s quest and he can react differently to you based on this choice but there’s just… no weight to it. The Wardens still help you, you cannot lock yourself out of any of the factions, you can please everyone. Which I love doing in a DA game don’t get me wrong - but it’s much more satisfying when I have to work for a good ending where everyone��s happy.
I think of Redcliff in Origins or Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts in Inquisition, these quests have choices that matter and you have to work to make sure you get the ending you want. Saving Isolde and Connor in Redcliff takes work; getting the exact right combo of rulers in Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts, takes work. It’s not easily handed to you, you have to pursue it by interacting with the world around you and understanding what’s actually going on.
The Harding vs. Davrin choice is so cheap and I really have no other way to describe it. First, we have no reason to believe that this choice will lead to the death of our companion, especially since we’ve spent all this time making sure we level them up and follow their quest lines to their end. But that doesn’t matter, it feels like it was done for shock value more than a story reason. It’s not even really brought up again except for brief mentions in the Lighthouse before the final march. They’re also the only ones who get locked into this type of ending which makes it feel even cheaper!
Neve and Bellara can be saved even after being infected with the blight and no I’m not over it! It’s just a real slap in the face that Davrin or Harding - two of the best characters in the game imo - are sent to their death for what feels like no reason except that… checks notes… their idea was better in your opinion? They don’t even die on their side mission, they die WITH YOU IN A CUT SCENE. It doesn’t matter what you do, one of them will die and I wouldn’t mind that except… no one else is ever put into this kind of peril.
It also feels like no other choice I made up until that point matters. It doesn’t matter that Davrin and I chose to release the Griffons to forge a new path, it doesn’t matter that Harding chose forgiveness instead of being consumed by the rage of her ancestors. It doesn’t matter that we helped the gray wardens or that I asked Harding about the inquisition or that I took them on any number of side quests, it doesn’t matter if you romance them.
You just pick which of them you don’t mind finishing the game without and that’s that. It’s grinding my gears the more I think about it so let's move on.
Fifth: The Morrigan of it all… Okay, full disclosure, I’m a Morrigan hater. I find her romance in Origins gross, I think it’s stupid she became an advisor to the Orlesian Empress in Inquisition (homegirl was raised in a swamp, what do you MEAN she’s an advisor to the Empress!?!?), and I hate that her solution to your problems is trust me intrinsically and also let me have sex with someone who expressly does not want to. BUT I truly did enjoy the Mythal lore and Morrigan becoming Mythal is interesting.
Just one itsy-bitsy problem is that I just spent three whole games spanning in-game decades trying to make sure this didn’t fucking happen. And yet, here we are, with this… happening. Ooooo Bioware when I catch you it’s on SIGHT. Not only does this make everything else you did with her feel like a colossal waste of time… it ultimately feels like nothing mattered. Who cares if I spent two in game decades handing Morrigan her own autonomy on a silver platter? Who cares that I did everything in my power to make sure she could do what she wanted instead of bending to the whims of her abusive mother?
Ignoring the fact that apparently Morrigan and Isabela (who are both easily in their 50s at this point, remember how Wynne was barely cresting 50 and the game treated her like she was a granny?) haven’t aged a day cause I guess women can’t age… did anything I do matter? We get a weird vague line from Isabela about family and Morrigan seems to think she and the inquisitor are besties… which they are reluctant allies at best in most playthroughs I’ve seen and played. And oh by the way, that kid she maybe had, that could be an elder god? Yeah he either doesn’t exist or she’s an absent parent whoopsie.
Sixth: The lore… I understand this game is trying to take the world in a new direction but this was not the way to do it. We could have gotten a better shot at a DA2 type of game. A smaller, more contained story but they went scorched earth with so much that it feels… like a huge let down.
Not to mention that as a recovering catholic I loved the lore of the Chantry. I loved dissecting the intricacies of a huge religious institution that has good people but a rotten core. Examining faith and how sinister it is when institutions get a hold of something that imbues so much meaning into people's daily lives was genuinely cathartic for me. And this game basically tells you that the chantry is wrong and to go fuck yourself because it doesn’t matter and it never did. It takes away so much nuance and realism within its own lore (not to mention they just hand wave it off when Harding rightfully brings this up as an earth shattering moment for her. What a weird thing to ignore). The answer is Elves, if you have a question the answer is elves, and I’m sorry I don’t love that answer. I’d rather have no answer, I’d rather be able to draw my own conclusions.
I love how nuanced and messy the lore of Thedas is, personally. I loved learning about how twisted the Qun is and how fucked Antiva is and that Ferelden is no better. I found it so fascinating no one place is good and just. They really did some revisionist history with Tevinter and especially the Crows (this game had one too many freedom fighter groups for my liking but I digress). All interest, morally gray intrigue, and nuance was sapped out of the world. All the bad guys are venatori or antaam, all the answers are Elves did it, and it feels so… devoid of intrigue. It was such a let down.
At no time did I ever feel conflicted about what I was doing, at no time did things ever make me question if I was doing the right thing. I never even really had to think very hard about what I was doing because most choices were pretty benign, like I could do no wrong, like I was being spoonfed my heroism. I didn’t have to think, for the most part, and that makes me sad.
Seventh: Varric… oh Varric… my sweet beloved child they did that to you didn’t they? I don’t inherently have a problem with Varric dying, honestly I don’t. The execution, however (pun intended), was garbage. I echo what others have said… why is Varric the one chasing after Solas? Varric was close to everyone in the inquisition, sure, but I’m not sure he and Solas were besties.
If Cole were the one going after Solas I’d get it. If it were Bull going after Solas to beat the shit out of him, I’d get it. If it was Dorian going after him because he’s the closest in proximity I’d get it… but Varric being the one to try talking him down ‘because he’s my friend!’ is frankly, bad writing. I feel like the team wanted to send him off but this was not it fam. Varric does love his friends this deeply… but for Solas it feels wrong and weird and (dare I say it?) out of character.
Honestly, if they had him actually be alive in the Lighthouse and being that mentor figure I would have much preferred it. I could have overlooked the narrative wonky-ness if Varric had lived… but him being dead pissed me off. I can't even lie about it. It felt like shock value for shock value’s sake and I hated it.
It feels like we should have been with the Inquisitor tracking Solas down or at least hired by them… but instead we get dead Varric and no substance… awesome.
Eighth: The God’s Prison… of all the weird retconn-y odd narrative choices that were made this one irks me the most… just… the very concept of Solas and the other gods not being able to get themselves out of the Fade prison but you can is so… just dumb honestly. I think, in theory, the idea that you have to work through your regrets to release yourself from that prison is actually really interesting… but here’s the problem with that:
Solas did work through his regrets and he has been able to let go at least somewhat. He knows what he did was wrong and he wants to change… He’s just the king of over correction lol. I just find it laughable that you can get out of this supposedly impenetrable prison but no elven god can because they’re too proud. Elgar’nan and Ghilan’nain I can buy, but Solas I simply don’t buy it. It’s just… I don’t know, truly laughable is the only word I can use to describe it.
You’re telling me that Solas - who learned about the power of friendship and individual autonomy all throughout Inquisition - hasn’t learned to navigate his regret? Solas who can look romanced quizzie dead in the eye and tell her ‘I love you, you taught me so much about this world and I am still learning. I’m going to end this. I’m going to fix my mistakes. I’m going to make the world better.’ hasn’t had to grapple with what he’s done? Are y’all for real Bioware?
Ninth: Solas… Solas, Solas, Solas, my sweet summer child, you are the biggest case study of missed opportunity that I see in this game. I think he was severely underutilized, talking to him, his memories, and just having him around was genuinely the best part of this game for me. I love him fighting with Elgar’nan in my head, I love him being saucy with me in my dreams, and the romanced quizzy ending is cannon to me. But he just wasn’t present enough! He felt like a vague threat but I also… I also don’t really think this game did enough to make him a threat.
In Trespasser I genuinely feared this man, I thought ‘oh fuck we aren’t going to be able to stop him easily’ but then he is just… so easily taken out it’s laughable.
I think this game’s biggest flaw is that we get no build up to Solas as Rook. This game relies on the fact that you know Solas from Inquisition but then we don’t even really get that Solas (see bad ending where he calls himself a god oh Bioware I am in your YARD he would never say that). If we spent the whole game trying to find him, gathering allies, looking for clues only to meet him at the end and triumph by sealing him away… only to find out we released the evanuris into the world (obvious sequel bait is obvious but hey games do what they must) that would have been dope as hell!
I feel like the writers of this game felt like they had to deliver a sequel when honest to goodness I think it would have been much better if they didn’t. I think if this game had been divorced from the main series and truly had an independent story it could have been great. I keep saying if this game was a precursor to the ‘let’s take down Solas’ game it would have been epic. If this game introduced us to Rook and co, then at the end we meet the inquisitor and they’re like, “Hey losers do you wanna save the world!?” That would have been so cool.
But at the end of the day it IS a sequel and it’s a bad sequel. I truly like this game when it’s not trying to follow up Inquisition, but as a sequel it fails at every hurdle. Solas is a fascinating villain, he is a character I adore and really find interesting, compelling, tragic, and downright terrifying. And they didn’t use him to his fullest extent at all.
In theory - Rook is Solas’s foil. We get to accomplish what he couldn’t, saving the world and all that… but Rook and Solas are not actually parallels, their life experiences and their goals are nowhere near aligned enough to make this argument. If Solas were really watching us become him or if we saw ourselves becoming Solas that would have been interesting. Instead, Solas points out our similarities ‘you’re willing to do whatever it takes’ or ‘you’ve got fire and passion to do the right thing’ or ‘you do what’s right and say fuck the man when you need to’ but our reasons feel achingly hollow compared to his. We are not the same. So him thanking us at the end of the game feels out of place. He should be thanking the inquisitor for coming back to him - because really she is the one who saves him. Her love saves him, Rook just bought her time to get to him.
What sucks is that Solas is so endlessly interesting to me. This is a character that created this world and he regrets it. Can you imagine a god that regrets their creation? That idea has me physically unwell and they squandered it.
Tenth: The thesis of this game. Now let me start off by saying, not all games NEED a thesis. But some of them have them regardless and the Dragon Age games like having something to say. So bear with me while I opine about a very watered down thesis for each game. And it could be argued these games have multiple or different ones than I present but this is my hear me out post, get your own, lol.
Origins poses the question ‘how far will you go to save the world?’ We are constantly asked to do morally dubious things to save the world. Do we recruit slave labor from the Golems for a better army? Do we save the Circle mages or do we let the templars slaughter them? Do we recruit Loghain as a gray warden knowing the crimes he has committed? Do we let Morrigan conceive a god baby to save our own life? These questions are answered by our choices and it makes this game interesting. It makes each Hero of Ferelden different and it makes our choices matter, people we meet and grow to care for live or die by our decisions and it makes the player feel important.
DA2’s thesis is ‘we are the product of our circumstances’. DA2 is, at its heart, a tragedy, people are victims of their circumstances, including Hawke. No matter what we do, we lose our siblings and our mother to circumstances beyond our control, with or without our heroism. No matter what we do the qunari will rampage through the city. No matter what we do the chantry is destroyed and we must side with the templars or mages. Yet, in spite of the horror, Hawke can choose how they respond to their situation. We get to choose to be kind or brutal, we can choose to seek justice or be pulled through it kicking and screaming. We are dealt a shit hand at every turn, what we choose to do with it matters.
Inquisition’s thesis is ‘how do we forgive in the face of corruption?’ Every organization we meet in Inquisition is corrupt as fuck. They are terrible, they treat others without dignity or care, they spit in the face of decency but WE can change that. We as the player can step in and be the change we want to see in the world, literally. We can beat back corruption and evil with compassion and understanding… or you know, we can make them worse, because Inquisition gives you the option to be a dick if you want. We are tasked with saving the world and we can either be selfish about it like every other organization we encounter or we can be the altruistic light in the darkness - the dawn in an otherwise bleak future.
It feels like the thesis of Veilguard is ‘you can’t do anything alone’ when it should have been ‘what are you willing to sacrifice for the greater good’ or even better ‘it is easy to become the very thing you fought against’.
We spend the whole game watching how Solas made the hard choices in a losing fight, that he became something he never wanted to be because all he saw was the end result and not what was being lost along the way. Solas was a good leader, Solas had people fighting with him, and Solas was not afraid to make sacrifices for the greater good. Which would have been fascinating if we - Rook - had any hard choices to make at all and could relate to that.
We tread dangerously close to something great in this vein, the idea that we can be good leaders, get the job done, and do minimal harm - but it is done in such a way that it is made seriously unrealistic and uninteresting. We get through mostly unscathed with minimal losses that we care about beyond the vague answer of ‘normal people died/got hurt’ but we never really see that (don’t get me started on the mourning scene in the final battle, I was surrounded by sheets? I can only assume if your friends died you’d see their faces but mine didn’t soooooo). We are a better leader than Solas by virtue of our situations being significantly different. We are facing a known foe, with a clear cut way to beat them, allies who help us with minimal persuasion, and no insurmountable problems. He didn’t have any of that, he led a grassroots rebellion with basically only slaves and spirits to help him against people who were doing things he’d never seen before. The difference is just… they’re incomparable.
Can you imagine if we really had to face the idea that we are becoming the very thing we sought to destroy? Can you imagine the slow, creeping realization that we are just like Solas. If we had to sacrifice one or two or even more of our faction alliances to proceed through the game? If there were actual STAKES!?! If Solas saw us as his equal or another incarnation of himself? If he saw us going down the same path he did and it sparks empathy in him? If he wanted us to actually succeed because he has learned to see the good in this messy creation of his?
The DA games are - at their core - about sacrifice, what you are willing to give up for the greater good? In these games, the goal is to save the world, so how will you fight for it? We have nothing to fight for here because it’s not really a fight at all.
This idea that you can’t do anything alone is nice… but being alone is never an option for us. Solas puts himself in exile, Solas is alone but Rook never is. It’s not an option not to recruit your companions, you have to. It’s not an option to turn any of them away or to have them leave your party, and they’ll always love you if you do the bare minimum for their quests. The only time they ‘leave you’ is if they die but that’s not until the very absolute end, and even then they die in service of you - you are not ever alone in this fight.
If this game wanted to say something about how our people make us better we should have been met with a point in the game where we are alone. Fade prison doesn’t count because really nothing happens there; it's all cerebral internalized shit and you’re pulled out of it relatively quickly. We should have been hit with the idea that without our people - the bonds we choose and those we love - we are nothing and we were never faced with that potential reality.
In addition… Solas had people. He had Mythal and Felassan and he trusted them so intrinsically it became a part of his downfall. If he was your friend or lover in Inquisition he is a ride or die, he cares deeply for you and your team - so much so, he leaves because he sees himself as a danger to you. He’s only alone now because he chose to be alone… should we not also parallel this? Should we not also feel more bound to Solas because we see ourselves in him? We keep saying we’ll do ‘whatever it takes’ but it only takes the minimum to get the damn job done. We get to take the path of least resistance constantly, we get to be a hero with little to no losses that we see or care about - and perhaps this is because I did completionist this game and worked for it… but I didn’t ever feel like I had to work particularly hard.
This game ultimately fails because what it’s trying to say has no weight, what it’s trying to dictate to us is just said and never shown. We are not treated as an active participant in this narrative, we are just a consumer and I find it offensive that it was touted as an RPG when there’s minimal roleplay in the game.
In conclusion, your honor, this game is not a disappointment because I wanted Inquisition 2 - this game is a disappointment because it doesn’t say anything worthwhile. It presents ideas that, on their face, are good but never delves into them, it saps nuance out of an otherwise lively incredibly lore rich world, and it ultimately takes power away from the player to service a story that no longer wants to affiliate itself with its predecessors. Which is a damn shame because what came before it has so many interesting and thought provoking ideas this world could have built itself upon and chose to disregard.
If they wanted a relaunch, that’s fine… divorce yourself from ALL the games if that’s the case. Tell a smaller story, go back in the timeline before any other game, do anything else.
I will still probably play future Dragon Age games (because the track record is now the odd numbered games are good, the even numbered games are less good). I can find the good in these games despite my disappointment. But this game is still just that to me, a disappointment, end rant.
#dragon age 4#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age veilguard#dragon age veilgaurd spoilers#dragon age spoilers#da4#datv#datv spoilers#datv critical#dragon age veilguard critical#kind of goes into hate tbh#there’s a lot to like here#there’s also a lot to critisize#and boy howdy do I have things to say#solas dragon age#dragon age varric#full of spoilers#yall asked for this post and now we’re here
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
WIFI IS MINE ONCE AGAIN as i sit on a mattress on the floor
#it feels like ive been without it for so long...#it has been... three and a half days... i am Weak....#nah jk i wouldve been find without it for much longer#but boy howdy am i Glad to be able to use my dear beloved laptop again#i am In The New Place i am Beginning To Settle#tomorrow i begin unpacking my own stuff!!! exciting!!!#i cant wait to admire all of my Things!#ohhhh and i finally have a spot on the wall for my combo whiteboard/corkboard....#im still very stressed and i want to lay in a hole but!!#i am doing slightly better than a few days ago!#the weather has been nice... cool and rainy... i am not used to cool and rainy#its also cold and i am - unfortunately - a desert creature#suffice to say i am wearing hand warmers a hoodie and a blanket#absolutely unprompted#the place's last owner Didnt Fucking Clean though#so there have been many spiders. and cobwebs. and general Grime we will have to scrub#like seriously today i was dusting the ceiling. THE CEILING.#had to dust & vacuum the windowsills... gonna scrub my bathroom tomorrow...#theres a large tear in my bedroom carpet too...#ugh and the cabinets are Small so organizing all the spices and shit has been Rancid#stuff has to go out of place and you cant see it all and MY ORGANIZATIONAL SYSTEMS ARE CRUMBLING#sometimes it feels like my adhd and autism are fistfighting but during a move?#lockstep babeyyyy. they are Streamlined. lots of things and lots of sorting & placing and eeheehee#i have also killed most of the freakishly huge mosquitos in the house so! things are better!#that first night was Rough! its better now! this shell is becoming a House!
168 notes
·
View notes
Text
I need to start thinking of ideas for the prompt list I made to get myself to sketch more in October, but instead I'm drawing self-indulgent comics about cats 😭
#lots of words in the tags!!!#i was watching the livestream and drawing until midnight#but i sketched the whole comic and refined the sketch so i can do lineart over it#and started the lineart and used a new brush and hoooooly shit i love it#i love what i've done so far#and i almost didn't draw at all last night because i was having a kinda hard day with the brain#but boy howdy those 3 hours of drawing helped so much#i need to get back to work now so i can start drawing before 9 pm today#but i have been thinking about it non-stop#also there's something really really incredible about making something like this and seeing the art improvement clearly#i think i've said it before but i used to have such trouble with things like hands and expressions and movement#and i'm not saying i can't or don't hope to do better with them still#but now i don't feel like i struggle AS MUCH and i don't dread drawing these things anymore#i cannot believe that my#what is this#like a furry era or something?? idk#i can't believe it's pushed me to get better at art than i ever have before#thanks if you read this far <3#this is eli
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
feels like the isolation is a gushing wound and going to the centre is just a small bandage. i think perhaps i am not really ever going to feel okay unless something miraculous happens. i am retaining some semblance of sanity now that I'm leaving the house and socializing with non-family more than once a week, but i am still hurting more than I can really tolerate and I don't know what to do about it. there doesn't seem to be a fix for this that I can enact.
#part of me wonders if going to the centre is helping or hurting more#but i think it's definitely helping more. however it is definitely also hurting/making some things worse#i just wish I could be operating at the same level as most of society#and i feel so egotistical when I talk abt this#but like. why am i always so fucking aware of every single thing going on#and everyone else is just painfully oblivious#I AM USING HYPERBOLE. ITS NOT EVERYONE. i know im not the only person ever lmao#when i got my autism diagnosis i thought oh good okay so THIS is why im such a freak#and now I've met so many other autistic ppl irl and um. no. no thats definitely not it still.#yes its probably part of it but im also just. so fucking traumatized i guess idk. i hate this so much#i just want to be the same and fit in and not be analyzing everything and be able to actually speak my mind#and not be so kind and polite and respectful all the time and be able to say shitty stupid things without thinking anything of it#im so tired of being the only one who seems to care so much about everyone else's comfort and feelings#but also at the same time i would hate if i acted like everyone else bc i know how shitty it makes people feel#and people are always so happy to see me because I am useful and make them feel good and comfortable and heard#and that matters. that means a lot to people i think. but also I am not a person. i am a tool.#and I'd really like to be a person#i somehow feel like im operating at a higher level/awareness than almost everyone irl and also way below everyone at the same time#like im so hyperaware of everyone else more than most ppl but im also so socially inept sometimes. and just... idk how to be a person.#i dont know i just want to not be like this. its so lonely and tiring and i want to matter to people#i want them to like me for more than just what I'm able to do for them. I want to be liked for Me i guess. but Me isnt likeable maybe#Me is uncomfortable for people. Me is a trembling cornered prey animal with a longing to tell stories but is too afraid to do anything#and so Me just exists in a hollow shell made out of people-pleasing and fawning and mirroring everyone around them#and then i get lonelier and more isolated and nothing really changes. but every time i try to crack open the shell a little it goes badly#like i genuinely dont think its my paranoia. i think it is not Safe for Me to exist properly.#i am too sensitive probably! but it does very much feel like a raw wound that peope jab aggressively at when i open up a little!#boy howdy i sound like such a wuss. i mean i probably am one fjfkdl#i just feel like I keep trying to fix things and improve and try new things and nothing ever really works well#my counsellors have always commented on how impressed they are at my willingness to try things#and its like ?? yeah ! ofc i am going to try things! maybe that will be smth that finally helps!
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh i'm definitely gonna lose some friends for this one huh
#already got vagueposted about by one former friend as 'comparing pro-palestine sentiments to antisemitism'#direct quote 'israel desperately wants them to believe this is a religious war and not a genocide'#same guy who said 'boy howdy do we know their side of the story' and ten short texts later said verbatim:#'we can't use religion as birthright thats stupid and the Number One Tool of Colonizers'#which is a STAGGERING amount of cognitive dissonance#as if religion is the relevant part and not the literal historical fact of jewish indigineity to eretz israel#mind you at the time of the vaguepost the ONLY thing i said regarding palestine#was that if your 'support' for palestinians includes sharing basic antisemitic dogwhistles and blatantly lying about history#then that 'support' will accomplish nothing for palestinians and only get jews killed#and i feel like looking at that and insisting that i'm comparing all pro-palestinian sentiment to antisemitism is uh. telling#we'll see how this ends up going - i fear it may not be the greatest for my social life but i stand by what i said#bc even if i am wrong about Everything directly surrounding israel and palestine#i was strictly discussing antisemitism in the discourse surrounding it#and a longer version of 'no stance on israel makes you immune to antisemitism and antisemitism runs deep and will affect your thinking on#the matter and refusing to acknowledge that is dangerous' isn't actually dependent on the intracacies of the conflict it's just True#and i'm not gonna back down again i'm not going to downplay antisemitism again i'm not going to give up#i'm not sure if i have jewish friends i simply do not know about who see what i say on there#but if i do then i need it to be clear they have Someone who is willing to fight for them#and if not i still need to make it clear i won't stand for blatant antisemitism no matter whose name it's in#the only thing that would make me consider taking down what i said is if i believed it's counterproductive#and part of me wonders if it is - i don't want to put people on the defense bc that's simply not conducive to good faith discussion#but at the same time i know that a lot of what i've needed to hear was fed up or harsh words#that i started off just reading and keeping my defensiveness inside until they sunk in over time#and maybe my frustration will have that effect for someone#damn i really need to make some jewish friends... maybe after break i'll reach out to hillel or a local shul to ask if they could use a han#or something idk we'll see#personal#faggotry enjoyer original
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#so that dotd rewrite is out and i have some thoughts on it but i wouldn't know where to put them.. maybe in here bc i don't actually feel -#- like making a whole ass text post. this is coming from me as criticism and not hate.. just some crit from one fan to another if you get m#SPOILERS AHEAD >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>#first off props to the team because this was obv a labor of love - 4 and a half years to make a feature long fan movie is hard work#and the animated stuff was a really nice touch and very commendable - you don't see them too often in big fanworks#in terms of the story well.. there are some things i like and some things that i don't (personally) again no hate#i'm aware this is a rewrite and boy howdy it IS a rewrite - though i am a bit sad that percy doesn't end up being the protagonist and it's#- thomas that has to play hero again.. like i kinda get it but what made the original dotd stand out was that percy was given the spotlight#so i spent an ungodly amount of time wondering when percy was gonna take charge or step into the main story to resolve the problem.. sigh#i liked that they tried to give norman more of a character bc a lot of characters do often get neglected in the series but it was kind of -#- hard to sell that for me? the twist in this rewrite was very creative and i do appreciate it but i guess it just ain't for me#“different” is ok and this is just one of many fan rewrites for this particular story#if there was something i enjoyed.. i guess the beginning was still kind of exciting because the set up was honestly like hype a bit#i liked that diesel and d10 actually got to interact face to face and there are clearer dynamics established for the diesels#and also. silverband's performances as d10 will always be fun he does a fantastic job voicing him (how d10 stole xmas will still be my fav)#my criticisms for this movie also derive from the pacing and the voice acting - i found it hard to try and understand tones sometimes -#- because the delivery felt so off.. like don't get me wrong not everyone in the fandom is a voice actor but if we're using static faces -#- for these fan works the delivery has to be a little more clear or else it'll sound like you're reading from a script.. sorry yall :"|#for the pacing i found it a bit hard to parse when some things were going on and how fast things were progressing#as well as the crashes.. that's also another thing bc i couldn't tell bc of the sfx and audio balancing - it could be better..#i wanna say. muffled voices do not substitute for a “far away”/off-screen voice bc i still can't hear it :“|#there were a lot of throwbacks and references to older thomas media/movies but some of them felt a little.. much?#if this is a dotd rewrite why are we getting some parallels with tatmr.. but i digress. at least they made diesel beef with duck a bit#there's a lot more i could say but i'm keeping those to myself. at the end of the day this fan movie was hard work for everyone involved#and you can tell some of the folks were having fun in there - props to them! i'm always glad to see more fan works in the community#we've come so far we're making feature length fan stories and rewrites that's crazy! i hope to see more in the future#fauxtrainpost.txt
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh shit y'all.
i've done gotten invested in Gurren Lagann. we're like 19 episodes deep in this paint and i have been emotionally compromised by the silly mechs.
believe in the me.
#that believes in you#i was gonna say pray for me but that makes me actively uncomfortable so don't do that#but i figured the believe in me thing was fitting#gurren lagann#i don't know how deep this rabbit hole will go for me - but i have a drill so let's find out i GUESS#y'all i did not anticipate this being what happened to me in my 30s i thought i'd found all the anime i was going to be emotionally attache#to in my teens and HERE WE ARE I MISSED ONE I GUESS#i'm having a blast don't let my silly complaints fool you i like to be dramatically angry about things that delight me sometimes#the THEMES the MOTIFS the STORY IT'S TELLING#UGH#SO GOOD#i don't want to hear criticism about it because it's BEAUTIFUL and I LOVE IT#we're watching kill la kill when we get done with gurren lagann and i am SO EXCITED about that trigger knows my weaknesses#and it's goofy faces and tiddies while dealing with really deep subject matter in a ridiculous way#also apparently mechs? wasn't anticipating that one at all i am ambivalent about mechs in general#but BOY HOWDY DID I CRY WHEN DAI-GURREN HAD TO EXPLODE ITS SWORD OFF#anyway... where was i#oh yeah so anyway in case you haven't guessed yet this taking over my brain slowly but surely and i'm sure there will be at least one#attempt at fic in the future for me we'll see how it goes#in the meantime...#oh yeah fun fact#i fucking thought gurren lagann the mech was from gundam and so when i started recognizing it i went THAT'S WHERE IT'S FROM?? but in my hea#because i didn't actually watch gundam i was ambivalent about mechs as stated earlier but of the gundams that one was my favorite#AND IT'S NOT EVEN A GUNDAM I FEEL SLIGHTLY LIED TO BUT IN A GOOD WAY SOMEHOW???#anyway we're having a super normal one over here don't mind me
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
not exaggerating not blowing the situation out of proportion prommy but I think I’d rather do literally anything else before that chemistry group project. put me in the furnace or something. mountain. exam?? ?
#raii talks a lot#Please anything else. I made. Like a list of things that the group needs to do. and it’s stuff I need to do/stuff I need to make them do#And ik they’re not gonna care or listen to me. Even though I’m the group leader because no one else gave a shit and this is a big grade#like sorry for being a loser guys sorry for being a nerd but boy howdy we should do this thang huh. Pass this class. You sophomore shits#very close to asking my prof if i can get out of doing this. because I leave this year and they obviously dont#And I have ap tests and a sat which they also don’t have and god id take a full exam over this at this point#There’s just so much to do and so many things I want to prioritize and I’m so ashamed to ask my prof that because I like him and what if he#says no that would be mortifying. coping by making lists and trying to work ahead and reading mk which doesn’t help chem-wise#but it does make me feel less like passing out in agony. like woah i love this book I love this guy!!! I’m going to attack classmates#I loooove complaining I love this book I love kicking people and raging
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
his gloves.....are u kiddin me....
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
actually i have discovered the only true and correct reading of md/zs: wgxn are the true Evil Men of mdzs. just look at how they’re dealing with lxc post-guanyin
#'how' = not at all.#it's almost unbelievable how little wwx cares about lxc now that the whole case is over#it's just a fun puzzle for him to solve which isn't necessarily a criticism of him as a character because boy howdy do i Know that he's not#some kinda bleeding heart. but he just... basically explains everything at the end like a triumphant detective in a classic mystery novel#and you have lxc. having JUST found out that jgy was Obviously provoked into violence and that the only reason he went to the temple#instead of making a beeline to the nearest port was to pick up his mother's remains. he's heartbroken and confused#and even the narration is almost cruel in its 'well if jgy's best friend doesn't know then how could the others know?' and then wwx goes#'welp! gotta call people and take care of this coffin mess i think!'#AND THEN wgxn just casually decide not to reveal the VITAL (for lxc) information about jgy to him. because it would make him look#sympathetic. just tell him if he asks lz! i'm soooo tired of this bullshit u_u#what is he supposed to ask about you soggy banana. 'hey didi is there something you didn't tell me about jgy?' like this? like this?#bastards BASTARDS i say. and then they go on to fuck in the bushes without hearing the boring and annoying gossip from the jianghu!#brother? ah forget him. wwx's butt won't fuck itself we've got a busy day ahead#hashtag wgxn hateposting i do what i want it's my blog#like. i understand Dignity and stuff and lwj probably couldn't and wasn't even the type to hug his brother in public and go 'there there'#but he doesn't. he doesn't do a thing. at all#the only thing he says to lxc is 'jgy's killing intent.' that's it. at least in cql he leads him out of the temple and#physically supports him. here? nothing. lxc is repeatedly described as 'not realizing what had happened' 'lost in thought' 'startled'#and even 'in normal circumstances zewu-jun would have immediately understood it'. he is Mentally Unwell. but that's his problem because#he liked the guy we decided was a villain. 😬#shut up shrimp#(i know the bushes of love didn't happen /immediately/ post-guanyin (imagine that though.) but they're fucking haunting me)
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
😥😨😰
#really wish i had some real friends to talk to#im just sorta frwaking out and i kinda wish that i had someone to freak out to that would be able to talk me down#do i have friends? yeah probably i mean i atleast call them friends but boy howdy can i not talk to them about /this/#it's fine it's cool k i am not trying smto strwss vomit but it's totally chill#oh god im going to stress vomit unless i calm down FUCKING CHILL ok breathe breaht it's fine im fine#ignore this#vent#i say things too#for posterity
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Low key I wanna make a Playlist for chilchuck and his wife bc even tho I don't ship it myself and I see them separating, they have so much potential
Speaking of I should probably rename her instead of using jaylark bc idk who originally made that name but gdi I love that name sm
In their enstrangment era
youtube
youtube
youtube
youtube
When they were still childhood friends
youtube
#chilchucks wife#playlist#this is just for me#bc i do sometimes think of them and the implications#i love ciderjacks interpretation of chilchuck constantly coming home on the verge of death and her being sick of it and leaving#i also enjoy the neglect angle bc boy howdy do i relate to the feeling of neglect#but ive been having thoughts after reading posts about half foot women being encouraged to marry to support their families#and if they dont its considered worse than other races#and the thought of Chilchuck meeting thjs playful half foot girl before shes hit with the pressures to perform and conform to expectations#thinking of chilchuck helping her out of that mindset#promising a better future for her where she doesnt have to wear a mask#but when he wears his mask#she starts wearing hers again#and things become strained and tense because chil cant help but be secretive and protective snd thus forcing his own expectation on her#so she leaves#she can handle herself#shes stronger than she looks and she says chil is the one to thank for that - hes the one who encouraged her to be herself#and not follow the whims of her family#idk theyre just barebone thouvhts#but i feel their friendship is stronger and healthier for them instead of marriage#because marriage comes with external expectations and norms#but marriage protects them both in a sense#keeps them away from scrutiny#theh could trust eachother#but maybe if they approached it as best friends who just so happen to live together and they both lived independently#instead of husband and wife#idk#no one listen to me#i font know a lot about marriage i just know that I grew up with divorced parents who hated eachother so i am PROJECTING my complicated#feelings of marriage and relationships onto them
1 note
·
View note
Text
my gift is being annoying, see, i can hate myself and be so horrendously anxious that i think trying to make being alive easier for myself is somehow offensive to others bc thats how so many people online act like literally any accomodations not made by the doctors that dont care abt you at all are somehow unnecessary and ‘fishing for attention’ to the point i ruin myself and destroy my body avoiding accomodations bc i dont want to ‘seem like a bad person’ for quite literally needing help. but give me a tv show and 30 seconds with new information and i will either give you the most thought provoking theory or the most wildcard theory ever and always be correct.
#even when im not#see i might have zero confidence in most things but when it comes to wild takes for shows and shit? i am more right than the writers#i am simply better than them they wish they had my brain#do i deal with more anxiety than anyone ever wished would even exist yes i actively corce myself into 6 anxiety attacks every hour by#leaving my house and force myself to anyways its not good its not healthy dont do that do as i say not as i do#but is my brain incredible at being wild? yes show writers wish they were me#imagine being as out there as me#i lay the easter eggs before i know theyre easter eggs and watch as ppl froth to find them and cry when they realize they were right there#bc i didnt know they were there either i connected them after the fact#flawlessly crossover shit that shouldn’t work? try me u cant do what i can#im dazzling fake it til u make it or whatever#im also accidentally hilarious and that should be feared my power is incredible#’brina wtf—‘ so funny thing the thing that spurred this one#was seeing multiple ppl of a fandom on DIFFERENT websites incorrectly use the word wh/itewash#bc apparently they dont understand that whitewa/shing is not ‘they made this character dumb when they arent!!!’ like#thats not what that means buddy that you cant use that on a white character forbeing a dumbass their whiteness wasnt affected#is there any correlation to my beign annoyed at that and my temporary confidence? i have no fucjibg idea man im mentally ill what do ya want#i need anxiety meds that dont cause depresso and depresso meds thatdonf causs anxiety#otherwise my sudden jumps of this and wanting implosions just keep flickering#anyways i dont usually do this bc i dont wanna be an asshole but skmetimes you see shir and its like#damn ive never been the smartest bitch in the room before but boy howdy is that a feeling im feeling#raiiot#i still cant believe it#’they whi/tewashed (white character that is white in every material)’s storyline she did this dumb thing based on feelings insteads of#slowly entering madness!!!!’ do we need a masterclass on how a WHITE character cannot be wh/itewashed#and also that their MENTAL AND PHYSICAL HEALTH are NOT aspects of that when. again. THEYRE WHITE#THATS NOT WHAT THAT M E A N S#whatever gen that is i i dont think its the zoomies idk if its mellis or the xers hut like whoever u are#for fucks sake man. for fucks sake#your misuse of that word is almost as bad as your takes
1 note
·
View note
Text
Bluey in the genocide by Omar Sakr (posted January 2, 2024)
I am maddened by how apt it is that in trying to find this poem—a stellar example of how people gloss over the presence of politics “even” in children’s television programming—I kept running into articles with headlines like “inside News Corp’s Bluey genocide beat-up” and “Iconic Bluey cricket episode is accused of promoting ‘genocide’ by Muslim poet Omar Sakr” and “Poet Omar Sakr Alleges ‘Bluey’ episode ‘Cricket’ Genocide Themed.’ There is no accusation; there is acknowledgement. Sakr has not screeched onto the page with a list of grievances. He has rather gently described watching a cartoon with his son, a cartoon they were both enjoying until the moment where his experience of the world, the various lens through which he sees and has been seen, creates a pause of realization. It’s a realization that would fly over the heads of those who do not share those lens, who are free of the burden of carrying all of the extra meaning. Rusty’s dad could have been anywhere, away and missing these moments of learning and bonding for any reason, but a creative choice was made for deployment to be that reason—and in that revelation many viewers probably worried for the pup, taking in the notion that his father may not return. The intention with the storyline—I gather—is to provide acknowledgement and understanding to children of deployed parents, as well as describe simply to their peers those particular circumstances. This scenario invites me to ask further questions: why was the parent deployed? Where was he deployed to? On either side of this equation, how many other children are cleaved from their parents by governments and the notions of “duty” and “just following orders”? How many lives are destroyed by imperialism and so-called “peacekeeping”? Asking these questions takes nothing away from feeling sympathy for Rusty’s situation; it broadens the scope. What Sakr’s poem does is quietly turn your face to see the rest of it.
Whether you acknowledge it or not, whether it affects you or not, whether you’re just watching things for escapism or you’ve turned your brain off or you’re not paying attention, every creative endeavor is informed by some aspect of politics both personal and broad. Nobody is forcing you to think about it, to analyze, to identify every theme and potential piece of commentary. But those things are still there, and they tug at the strings of our experience. Being able to overlook or ignore those things can be part of our experience, and merely having them made visible to you is not an accusation or a condemnation. Seeing them may provoke feelings and questions. If those feelings are mostly defensive, there is an option other than fighting someone else’s reality: consider how those feelings and questions can help you see things to which you are not ordinarily subjected and, in doing so, learn something.
everything has political content. sorry. theres some guys who get really really angy when you say this but its true
#look I’m not an expert and i don’t have all the answers#and i don’t always think this deeply about stuff either!#but when i do i tend towards analysis and rambling so go right ahead and scroll by because I’m not scolding anyone#I’m doing poetry student things#i was accused of reading too much into things when i once offered up a gentle analysis of the character Chandler Bing on Friends once#but there’s a wealth of things to be uncovered and said about attitudes towards sexually ‘ambiguous’ men in the ‘90s#and how in making these milquetoast ‘haha he’s probably gay’ jokes they were also erasing bisexuality#and of course i think about these things because I am bisexual and i have loved bisexual men that struggled with their identity#so it’s only natural that i have something to say about it#and ordinarily i probably wouldn’t think much about children’s programming#i did get really pissed off when HBO acquired Sesame Street and put a paywall between its purpose and intended audience#and I’ve thought a lot about the impact of Warner Brothers cartoons as something I was just plonked in front of as a child#…and I do call Paw Patrol ‘Fash Pups’#okay so I think about it a lot#and i want to talk about these things but then I’m accused of taking things too seriously#when i just want to talk! i just want to discuss! i want to see the world around me and consider all of its facets!#even when i feel too dumb to really be putting an opinion out there because boy howdy i feel like an idiot most days!#anyway thinking’s free so I’m going to do it regardless#thank you for reading or not#go follow Omar Sakr#Omar Sakr#poetry#politics! politics everywhere!
46K notes
·
View notes
Text
i'm remembering why i don't stay on dating apps for long and why i have a hard time making connections with folks in general. if i have to teach one more fucking person about polite conversation with people you do not know yet, i swear to GOD.
#hhhhh i hate making generalizations but it does tend to be the cis men who don't know how talking to people like people goes#if you ask to see someone's art and they deign to share it with you don't immediately offer concrit unless it's specifically asked for?#like yes i'm concerned Iconic Character might not be recognizable despite my use of references for once#but i did not actually ask for your help on this because i don't know what your credentials are#and you barely recognized it as it is which is telling me you might not be the biggest fan of Iconic Character as you might think!#Fuck youuuuuuuuuu#i said yes to the offer because if they are reasonable changes i haven't already considered Part Of The Art i might consider them to improv#because i'm already going to be working on it again today so it's not really going to add any more to my plate than i might already have#but i don't even remember how many similar instances of fucking BONKERS things to say to a stranger i've been like#hey you know people don't talk to each other like this right? you know that's not how conversation is right?#please for the love of god tell me you don't talk to people IRL like this#cause i might start forming ideas about why tf you're on this app in the first place#like i know neurodivergence can be a hurdle and everyone's a little poorly socialized since lockdowns started in 2020#but... i KNOW these guys are not talking to their buddies like this#they think they can get away with it because i look like a woman#and if i gotta be the person who corrects them i will but boy howdy nothing gives me the ick faster than having to tell you that people#do not talk to other people like the way you're talking to me right now we do not know each other#do not presume you can just say Whatever at me and think i'm still gonna wanna try and get to know you to sleep with you like wtf#hhhh sorry. i'm like. probably not going to continue talking to this one but i did give him the opening to respond so i'll see what he has#to say and then move on with my life#it wouldn't probably be such a big deal if the vast majority of people i've attempted to talk to actually#yknow... talked to me.#but like it's fine. i'm fine. it's fine#like yes i would love to have someone i'm able to have sex with as well as friendship and general intimacy#i don't want to teach someone else how to be a person i barely understand it myself
0 notes
Note
could i request poly!wolfstar or poly!jily where they’re pursuing reader and reader accidentally matches with them (like matching costumes) at a halloween party?
i think the teasing and flirting would be so cute!! 🥰
Thanks for requesting!
cw: mention of alcohol, smoking, Sirius makes lame and humorously objectifying jokes
poly!wolfstar x fem!reader ♡ 1.5k words
You arrive to the party late, the Gryffindor common room already bustling by the time you and your friends have finished doing your last-minute costume alterations. There are glowing pumpkins floating on the ceiling, someone has charmed the room so that a thick layer of fog drifts along the floor, and the air already smells slightly of booze and cigarette smoke.
You lose Lily’s attention immediately, but that’s to be expected. You’re more than accustomed by now to her searching for her boyfriend whenever you enter a room. What’s unexpected, however, is her reaction when she finds him.
“Uh oh.”
“Uh oh?” You look at her, following her gaze to the couch across the room. “Oh. Oh, no.”
Lily laughs. “It sort of seems like fate, doesn’t it? I think it’s sweet.”
Sitting on their usual couch are the marauders. James, predictably, is wearing a costume matching Lily’s; they’ve both come as cowboys. Unfortunately, Sirius and Remus are sitting next to him dressed as pirates.
You’re also dressed as a pirate.
“It’s not sweet,” you moan. “If I go back up, do you think Marlene will make me some of her fake blood? I can change and be a vampire instead.”
Lily hums. “Think it’s too late for that, babe.”
She’s looking back towards the couch, where the boys have already caught sight of the pair of you. Sirius is beaming something atrocious, and even Remus looks amused while his boyfriend waves you over exuberantly.
Lily takes your hand in hers, tugging you with her as she goes to them.
“Howdy, darlin’.” James puts on an exaggerated southern drawl as you approach, opening his arms to his girlfriend.
“My, my,” says Sirius as you sit between him and Lily, “don’t you look nice.”
You ignore the warmth that brings to your face. “The point wasn’t really to look nice.”
Your costume is thrown together from things you already had, the only thing that really distinguishes you as a pirate being the bandana you’ve tied around your head. Remus appears to have gone a similar route, although the white shirt he’s tucked into his pants looks a bit more on-theme than yours and he’s clearly been forced to wear an eye patch which is currently flipped up so that it’s not covering anything. Sirius, of course, does nothing halfway. He’s wearing a billowy black top that’s been unbuttoned nearly to his navel, more belts and buckles than you knew one person could have, and a captain’s hat he surely bought just for the occasion. Altogether, you make a fairly fearsome group.
“Not sure you can help it, gorgeous.” Sirius winks at you. “You always look nice. Did you plant a spy to find out what you needed to wear to match us, then?”
You roll your eyes good-naturedly. “I should probably be asking you that.”
“Must’ve just been fate,” Sirius says. It’s so close to what Lily said that your cheeks blaze, but you also don’t know if you quite believe him. Remus, too, turns to give his boyfriend a questioning look.
Sirius catches it and scoffs, holding up his hands. “I didn’t! Honestly.”
Remus nods, appeased. In a less booming voice than his boyfriend’s, he tells you, “You do look very nice.”
“Thanks.” You catch yourself fingering the ends of your hair like a nervous schoolgirl and tuck your hands underneath your thighs. “So do both of you.”
Sirius grins knowingly, and you have to fight the urge to shove your face into Lily’s shoulder for refuge. He knows as well as you do that for all of his brazen flirting, it’s Remus’ quiet sincerity that flusters you the most. You’re not sure when it started, exactly, but it’s been clear for some time now that both boys are interested in you. You’re not sure in what capacity—they could want to take you to bed for one night, integrate you into their relationship, or anything in between—but as of yet you’ve neither encouraged nor discouraged their advances.
“Thanks, dollface.” Sirius gives a winsome crack of a smile. “You know, I’ve already acquired some booty, but I wouldn’t mind winning some more.”
“Sirius…” Remus groans.
You feel your eyebrows pinch. “Some what?”
“You know, like pirate’s loot? My booty.” Sirius sidles closer to Remus, giving his thigh a solid pat.
Remus’ eyes narrow. “I will leave you here and go back upstairs right now.” It sounds as though this is not the first time this has been threatened.
“I worked hard for it!” Sirius defends himself.
You cover your mouth against an appalled giggle. “It?”
“I toiled, and I fought, and I had to battle many other fearsome ships! It’s mine.”
“Remus,” you stage whisper, “blink twice if you need help.”
Remus’ smile blooms, but when he starts to blink Sirius objects, “Oi!”
“No,” you correct him, “you’re supposed to say ‘arr.’”
Sirius is grinning again, too, clearly chuffed that you’re joking around with them even if it is at his expense. “If I say ‘arr,’ you’ll agree to be my second booty for the rest of the night?”
“I won’t make any promises. But it would be persuasive.”
He growls enthusiastically, “Arrrrgh!” and slams his fist down on the table. The sound it makes is enough to tear James and Lily’s attention away from each other.
“Merlin,” says James. “Did’ya hurt yourself there, Pads?”
“No,” Sirius replies, but he gives his hand a little shake.
Remus, rolling his eyes, takes it and kisses the side. He brings it into his lap for safekeeping. Your heart gives a painful little throb.
You must have some stupid lovestruck look on your face, because Lily peers around James to see you better, a smile playing on her lips. She knows about your crushes on the two boys, just as well as she knows that you haven’t decided what to do about them yet. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t like to help you along.
“Come on,” she says to James, standing and taking him with her. “Let’s dance, and I’ll let you pretend to lasso me.”
James beams. “Yes!”
You watch them go while Sirius seizes the opportunity to move to your other side, the three of you taking up the entirety of the couch.
“Phew,” he sighs, swinging his feet over the armrest.
“You may want to take your legs out of the fog,” Remus suggests, also using the new space to bring his feet onto the couch. “It gets sticky after a while.”
You frown but do as he says, pulling your feet from your shoes so that only your socks are on the couch. And sure enough, when you touch a finger to your ankle it feels like there’s an odd sort of coating over it.
“I thought it was just fog,” you say.
“It was supposed to be,” agrees Sirius, “but James entrusted the task of making it to Marlene, and there are some who think she might’ve laced it with some sort of drink.”
“I’m some,” Remus owns.
You smile. “So is the point that you should be able to…drink the fog?”
“No clue.” Sirius leans over the edge of the couch. “Let’s find out.”
“Sirius, no,” Remus says weakly, trailing off when it’s clear the other boy won’t be deterred. You both watch as he sucks in what fog he can, closing his mouth around it. “That’s disgusting, everyone’s been walking around in it.”
“I think it might be brandy,” Sirius muses. “It’s faint, though.”
Remus frowns. “I’m not kissing you until you brush your teeth.”
Sirius grins. “Yes, you are.”
“We’ll see, won’t we?”
“Wouldn’t you rather just get your own drink?” you ask Sirius. “Rather than sampling the faint traces of brandy that have been touched by other people’s shoes, I mean.”
“Oh, rest assured, gorgeous, I’m all covered.” Sirius picks a cup up from the table. He seems to notice at the same moment that you don’t have a cup of your own. “Would you like one, though?”
You glance to the table cluttered with alcohol and mixers, a throng of students clustered around it. “I’ll get one in a bit.”
“Let me.” Sirius stands. He edges around the table, stopping to pinch your chin affectionately and give his boyfriend a kiss. “Rem, my love, keep her company, would you?”
“You don’t have to,” you object. “I can get it.”
“No, don’t be ridiculous. A pirate has to take care of his booty, hasn’t he?”
“I never agreed to that!” you call after him. In a quieter voice, you add, “And I don’t think that’s how the relationship between a pirate and their booty works.”
“Let him go,” Remus advises you. You startle a bit when his hand finds your knee, resting there in fond commiseration. “If he’s going to degrade us like this, he can at least bring us drinks.”
You feel your lips tilt. “Are you really going to let him call you his booty all night?”
“Probably.” Remus shrugs, his eyes finding his boyfriend across the room. “Anyway, it’s nice not to be alone in it. As far as he’s concerned, you’re already his as well.”
#poly!wolfstar#poly!wolfstar x reader#poly!wolfstar x fem!reader#poly!wolfstar x y/n#poly!wolfstar x you#poly!wolfstar x self insert#poly!wolfstar fanfiction#poly!wolfstar fanfic#poly!wolfstar fic#poly!wolfstar fluff#poly!wolfstar imagine#poly!wolfstar scenario#poly!wolfstar drabble#poly!wolfstar blurb#poly!wolfstar oneshot#poly!wolfstar one shot#sirius black#sirius black x reader#remus lupin#marauders era#remus lupin x reader#marauders#marauders fanfiction#marauders fandom#the marauders#hp marauders#marauders x reader
1K notes
·
View notes