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phoenixyfriend · 3 years ago

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Fake Sith TCW Trio

I have another fucked up time-travel AU! Who’s surprised? (Nobody.)

So like. Have you guys read that one fic where Luke and his students go back in time and pretend to be Sith Lords and are super hammy about it? (Sith Lord Swell by AMournfulHowlInTheNight)

This AU has contributions by @atagotiak, @the-lunar-system, @purronronner, @gelpenss, @creepingthroughthistidalwave, and @thisarenotarealblog.

I want TCW trio (plus Rex and Cody) to go back to several years pre-TPM and, since the Council DEFINITELY won't believe them about the Sith being back... they'll force the issue.

Anakin is weirdly excited about things and building up their backstory.

Anakin: Okay so I can definitely be a Maul type, with the unhinged ranting and manic laughter, Obi-Wan can be the whole Refined Rich Guy type like Dooku, where you can't even tell he's evil until he starts talking about getting out the eyeball scoops, maybe toss in a bit of mad science stuff? Ahsoka could play up like Ventress OR, oh oh, she can be the Light Side Child we need to PROTECT who's publicly begging us to return to the Light after our big dramatic Falls where we murdered like eighty people to save her, and-- Obi-Wan: Why are you never this enthusiastic about actual undercover missions. Ahsoka: Did you just have all this ready to go, or...? Anakin: WE COULD GET YELLOW CONTACT LENSES FOR ME.

Obi-Wan: How's my evil laugh?

Anakin going “Okay.. so if any of us need to murder someone to sell the bit it should be me, I think I could handle it the best. Why? No reason.”

Obi-Wan: I'm not sure a complete Fall could come from protecting Ahsoka, really-- Anakin: No, no, it could.

Obi-Wan: Surely you’d hold back because you realize neither of us want that for you. Anakin: Uh. Sure. Definitely.

Obi-Wan points out that none of them can channel the dark side to Prove they're Sith and Anakin just goes "Okay, give me like two seconds to stew in my negativity and--right, you can stop staring in horror, please."

Anakin rambles on that they can TOTALLY make the galaxy a better place while playing at being Sith! He's got a whole LIST of slave empires to "take over" and disassemble!

Anakin has a whole excited spiel about how EVIL soldiers and assistants are minions, in this case partly because Cody and Rex are too good at what they do to be mooks. Cody could pull off evil minion very well. Facial scar? Looks good in black? Quietly competent and sarcastic?

He also pushes for Obi-Wan to lounge in a fancy throne with a glass of wine while Anakin stalks the shadows and Ahsoka hangs out on the window ledge. The disaster lineage is dramatic, okay, Anakin’s just leaning into it, he’d appreciate it if everyone stopped looking at him like that.

Qui-Gon, surprisingly, ends up a skeptic about all of this. Everyone is freaking out about the Sith and he’s like “y’know I’m not even sure they’re darksiders.”

Some Jedi, possibly Qui-Gon for his conspiracy board, gets in a real risky situation and one of the Fake Sith saves them, but also panics and kinda drops character for a bit.

Jedi: You saved me! Why’d you do that? Anakin: I uh... just wanted the pleasure of killing you myself?

"You saved me. Why?" "Mmmm. Jedi." [walks away]

Qui-Gon: [trying to figure out what is up with these people semi-competently (from his perspective) pretending to be Sith] Dooku: [trying to protect Qui-Gon from Sith influence]

The gang is the most successful at pretending to be Sith to Dooku. Sure, they’re not gonna punish him for something he hasn’t done, but it’s not hard to act menacing and angry around him.

(They really do have so much fun irritating the heck out of Dooku. He hasn’t Fallen yet, but they want to keep an eye out.)

At some point, future Obi-Wan definitely drops that little tidbit of "What, you didn't think the Banites were the only Sith running around did you? You... didn't even know about the Banites. How... disappointing."

They REGULARLY use Ahsoka as an excuse to be marginally less terrible. They claim that if Ahsoka pouts, they stop. ‘Soka also uses them as an excuse for why she’s a lil feral. (To be fair, that one is accurate. She was already a lil feral before but it’s not like they did anything to stop it.) Ahsoka gets her "breaking into people's offices" jollies by bugging Nute Gunray's office.

The Jedi keep trying to Rescue Ahsoka.

Rex and Cody end up in real beskar, there's a whole Thing with Mandalore and Jango and Satine.

Obi-Wan is CONSISTENTLY worried about Anakin Falling for real, which... hey, at least he knows to be worried about Anakin Falling. Step up from canon, really.

Anakin is WAY too into killing the Hutts but like. It does... technically sell the bit.

Obi-Wan: Sure, I’m not sad that they’re dead, especially because we’re not connected to the Republic, so we don’t need to worry about starting a war and all that. But. Anakin is disturbingly cheerful about this. Rex: Wasn't he a Hutt slave? Obi-Wan: Well yes, but-- Rex: I'd kill Nala Se if I could get away with it.

Cody and Rex are very supportive of Anakin's murderous intentions.

Obi-Wan does understand anger, even killing someone in anger. Like Maul (the first time at least) and D’nar and a few others. All the same, like... y’know. The level of bloodthirst from the others is a little off-putting.

At one point, Anakin accidentally addresses young Obi-Wan by name, despite never having met before, and to cover it up, he... panic-flirts. He panics, and so he flirts, with young Obi-Wan.

(He will later blame this on old Obi-Wan, because he had to pick up the habit of flirting with the enemy from somewhere.)

Anakin vaguely implies that he's a wee bit obsessed with young Obi, and that the padawan should "get used to being the target of a dark-sider's interests," because he’s scrambling for Ominous Shit and, well, future Obi-Wan was pretty frequently a fixation point for darksiders, right?

The second he gets out, he just starts screaming into a bucket while Rex pats him on the back.

For the next however many terrible months, possibly years, he has to keep up the act while having an ongoing meltdown about how That's My Dad As A Twenty-Something.

(It doesn't help that young Obi-Wan reflexively flirted back.)

Old Obi-Wan, meanwhile, is just very "you dug this hole yourself, padawan."

There is an argument at the beginning about Obi-Wan’s outfit. If he’s gonna be a Sith, he can’t just go around in beige, but he’s like “I like this and it’s comfy.” Sure, he’s changed clothes for undercover stuff, but that’s always been temporary, y’know? He likes his beige.

We have a number of options.

My first instinct? Beige linen three piece suit, like a southern lawyer. "Now I may just be a simple Outer Rim force adept--"

And, of course, you can TOTALLY make the beige sinister: he’s impersonating a Jedi! Jedi impersonation would also explain why nobody has a red saber.

“Sure is good that the Jedi don’t seem to realize most of the galaxy doesn’t know red sabers are different and bad.” “Shhhh, stop poking holes in our story where a Jedi might overhear.”

Like.... if you do enough doublethink, it works! How would a Sith hide? In plain sight. Also, it’s a GREAT way (if they were actually assholes) to try to slander the Jedi name.

(Anakin and Ahsoka still think he could stand to put a little more effort in. Add a splash of color, for pity's sake!)

Though tbh part of me is like “What if Old Obi wore, like... a split skirt suit...” Victorian womenswear inspired because he misses his robes, but he has to look Professional, and like he's MOCKING Jedi instead of BEING one, so he wears a vintage-y split skirt thing over his leggings. Ends up looking a lot like what Ventress had for a while, but Beige. I also keep wanting to put him regency menswear.

Anyway. Obi-Wan’s wardrobe aside...

Anakin builds up his Tatoo accent again. It helps him with the (mostly true) "slavery helped me fall" backstory.

Either Cody or Rex offhandedly mentions being made to serve them (the Fake Sith) and now the Jedi are somewhat concerned about brainwashing. Are these Mandos the victims here?

“No like. Literally made for this. In a lab.” This is even more horrifying. So...

On the one hand good! The Jedi should be scared about Sith! On the other hand... it makes the Jedi more determined to stop them, specifically. They keep on getting in the way, just, all the time, and they’re not investigating the actual Sith problem, which is decidedly not great since the Team doesn’t actually know who’s a real Sith right now, except Maul, and who even knows where that guy is.

Obi-Wan, at some point: Do you think we've succeeded at this ruse... a little TOO well? Anakin: I don't follow. Obi-Wan, gesturing at the truly obnoxious amount of wealth they've collected, including "trophies" of their kills: Really? Because I'm a little worried! Anakin, planning out a battle to take on Nar Shadda: ...I'm not.

"How many people do we realistically we need to take over Hutt Space? Apparently... five."

(Mostly because Anakin is ridiculously op.)

ANAKIN AND YOUNG OBI GET KIDNAPPED BY PIRATES TOGETHER. It's tradition.

Anakin: Okay, so, I need to get really angry about something to pass as a Sith... time to think about my WIFE and how I'll NEVER SEE HER AGAIN.

Since Anakin’s life never goes as planned... this does not work. Instead of getting properly angry, he makes himself sad. There are tears. There is wailing. There’s a distraught rant or two. Young Obi ends up awkwardly trying to comfort him.

“Oh no, this… Sith?? Is crying on me. What do I do???”

Later on, when the Council wants intel: "So... one of the Sith cried on me about his wife. I think she's dead? He wasn't very clear about it but it, uh... it sounded like it might have contributed to his Fall. Also the relationship was a little unhealthy? He basically worshiped the ground she walked on and kept ranting about how he would have given her the galaxy on a platinum platter of she'd only asked, but that might be new and inspired by the Dark."

One of the random Jedi is REALLY good at detecting the truth Through The Force, and asks Anakin how he Fell...

Anakin just. Tells the Tuskens story.

They don't get pinged as lying, but oh boy does old Obi have a LOT of questions for Anakin once they're in private.

There are other things happening to help sell the ruse. Some of them are necessary! Some of them are... not.

Obi-Wan: What's the best way to show we're rich and kind of evil, but like... classy about it? Anakin, immediately: I sit on the floor next to the throne, leaning against it, and you call me pet names while stroking my hair, and then when you need something killed I get to do it for you and then I go back to the floor and you thank me for the directed violence, and then you go back to Negotiations with criminals while I’m sitting there covered in blood. Obi-Wan: ...is there something you want to TELL us, or...?

"You're all going to get a glimpse of something normally kept hidden about me." "Anakin, you don't have to do that." "No, I'm gonna."

(Anakin has decided hes going to peel his kink tomato to sell this ruse, and the others are slightly uncomfortable with that.)

Anakin: Okay, I cannot keep flirting with you. Young Obi: Wait, what? But that's the best part of any time we run into you! Anakin: You look WAY too much like my Master did when I met him. Obi: O...kay? If someone looked like my master when HE was young, I'd-- Anakin: My Sith Master half-raised me. He's basically my dad. Obi: ... Anakin: What's that look for? Obi: I mean, you spend a lot of time lounging at his feet, and, like, given how much you hate slavery, I... kind of assumed it was a kink thing? Anakin, brightly: Oh no, I just have a LOT of trauma. And neuroses. Snips says they’re neuroses.

Young Obi is a little upset because he was actually getting REALLY into Flirting With The Enemy and was hoping it would go somewhere. He mopes to Qui-Gon about it. Qui-Gon isn't sure whether to be proud about Obi breaking rules, or worried over Obi-Wan falling for a Fake Sith.

(As Tia put it: "You enjoy making young Obi-Wan have a completely unrequited crush on Anakin, don’t you?")

Fortunately, one of those attractive Young Mando boys very kindly helped him tape up his ribs this one time, and has thus caught his eye...

I feel like having Cody date Young Obi would court an entirely different kind of (internet) drama because clone ages, but whatever.

Also please imagine an element of "so I'm dating the genetic identical of my boss... who's dating the man I'm a genetic identical of..."

(It's probably not actually Jangobi but man would that be funny and also stupid.)

Somehow Young Obi figures out that the "Sith Master" is a future him before he realizes that they're not actually dark. In his defense, Anakin was pretty convincing. Especially with the wife rant. It makes HIM more obsessed with Anakin, in a reversal of the implied earlier dynamic, which is all kinds of weird. Less romantic but like. Still weird.

"Future Me Scares Me" with Extra stupid. "Future Me Annoys Me." "Future Me acts like grandmaster Dooku, but more sass." "Future Me raised a really hot evil guy that refuses to bang Present Me." "Future Me might be a Sith, but I'm getting more and more convinced he's just fucking with us all." "Future Me is really rocking that beard, and I can't BELIEVE we figured out a way around the babyface."

"I’m kinda concerned about the whole evil thing, but I’m also glad that I know I’ll stay hot as I get older."

Quinlan approves of the priorities.

Also a lot of interactions with older Obi are very Anakin: [does/says something deeply unhinged] Obi-Wan: So, do you want to…. Talk about that? Maybe? Anakin: What’s there to talk about?? I’m fine, everything’s fine! Anyways how about those plans for tracking down Maul?

Anakin later, like way after the ruse is lifted, just blankly tells everyone that he did Fall, once, and Older Obi made him get therapy about it after the truth came out between the two of them a few months into the Fake Sith thing.

Where'd they find a therapist? I'm sure there's one SOMEWHERE around. Denon and Herdessa are close enough, and they've done enough "your criminal empire now belongs to me" that they can pay well. They make sure to find one that takes confidentiality real seriously.

It's all very "we need some more time to unpack all that."

Therapy helps get Anakin to figure out Sheev’s whole deal. They don't necessarily figure out he’s a Sith from it, but they figure out he’s sketchy and they need to look into that more. Obi-Wan probably already thought he was sketchy, but the whole active gaslighting campaign was a little surprising. They realize that he kinda benefited a lot from a lot of Sith plots and they still probably don’t think he’s a Sith but Obi-Wan is definitely starting to think he’s working with one.

"Okay, we're already bugging Gunray, should we bug Palpatine just to be safe?"

They get away with a lot of slicing because Anakin is a technical genius from twenty years in the future.

The reasons they're so good at Taking Over Hutt Space: 1. They know parts of the future. 2. They have superpowers and FAR less reason to not use them, now that their actions aren't going to reflect on the Republic. 3. They have Cody and Rex, who are two of the greatest military minds in the galaxy, and know EXACTLY how to wage a war that covers a solid third of the galaxy, starting from a position of relative weakness. 4. Anakin's charisma is scary high, and his knowledge of slave culture means they gain a lot of trust from the people they free, and they just... keep acquiring volunteers for the army they didn't plan to have. Obi-Wan doesn't know what to do. He thinks they might have started a cult?

In his defense, Dooku sort of started a cult, and Komari got kidnapped by a cult, brainwashed into joining it properly, and then took it over as head figure of said cult. It's practically tradition!

Comics Vader is the central figure of like three different cults, it was really just inevitable.

Anakin: Aw, don't worry master, it's not a cult, it's a revolution! Ahsoka: They're worshiping him, though. Anakin: ...it's still a revolution! Just... with some misunderstandings.

Also, if they got wind of people trying to keep people from being able to leave and other culty stuff like that, they’d probably put a stop to it pretty damn quick.

Names! Time for names. As per usual, it's easiest to keep track of Obi-Wan's alternate Older Self by just calling him Ben.

Darth Ben.

Ahsoka: You should be Darth Boring. Obi-Wan: I can still make you run laps, you know.

Anakin: The Force is telling me to call myself Darth Vader. Obi-Wan: ...why? Anakin: I dunno, but it sounds cool, I'll run with it.

Someone: Ben has all the answers; we shouldn’t question him, ever. Ben: One time I lost a planet, and a five-year-old found it for me.

More options: Going with the "evil word with the prefix 'in' chopped off" that we get with Sidious and Vader: Darth Surrectus (as in insurrection) Just random Latin words: Darth Temporus (time) Darth Commenticius (fake)

Anyway, back to Nonsense:

Maul goes after young Obi early, because the Fake Sith are really invested in this one random Padawan (Sidious is saying he might be a cousin of the false Sith Master? They do look similar enough) so someone needs to investigate. Naturally, Anakin shows up with some wild screeching to fight Maul, and when someone questions why he got involved it gets very "Kenobi is MINE!" and like. Okay. So.

Anakin means it in a very Sith "to toy with" and "to torture" way, or the ‘my chosen opponent!’ way, just the same kind of Obsession as Maul had with Obi-Wan in the original timeline. Unfortunately, Anakin’s a weird-ass person who flirts with Young Obi against his own better judgement, so there's some awkward "Like... your boyfriend?" from young Obi. Anakin just screeches in SOME emotion that nobody wants to interpret, and couldn't even if they wanted to, and starts whacking away at Maul again.

(Anakin hasn't explained the "you look exactly like my dad, sorry, it's just too weird" thing yet, and he is HAVING MANY REGRETS.)

There's definitely at least one instance where a person asks Anakin if he's planning on dating That One Jedi Twink, or at least banging out the tension. At that point in time, Anakin doesn't actually know who the fuck they're talking about, because "Obi-Wan + Twink = Does Not Compute" for dear, dense Ani, and instead he just ends up ranting about how he is LOYAL TO THE MEMORY OF HIS LATE WIFE, how DARE anyone so much as INSINUATE that he would TARNISH HER PERFECT MEMORY and UNWAVERING KINDNESS and WHOLESOME BEING, and the person who asked doesn't end up lightsabered but they do end up with a LOT to tell whoever they're reporting to.

Young Obi-Wan definitely hears Anakin mutter the phrase “something to discuss with my therapist later” a few times, and he’s a little bewildered because darksiders definitely don’t seem like the type of people to go to therapy. They’re the type of people to need therapy, sure, but not the type to go to therapy.

I think it would be very fun for Young Obi to continue sighing over Anakin (who's pretending to be fine with it and even flirting back because he's in too deep to stop and hasn't worked up the courage to explain the elephant in the room) while Anakin is covered in grease and infodumping while having a slightly manic hyperfocus on engine repairs while the two of them Somehow got stranded together in the middle of bumfuck nowhere (it's Plagueis's doing, he finds the interactions between THESE two in particular to be the most informative regarding the fake Sith).

Anakin, at some point while stranded with young Obi-Wan, and having actually started unpacking some stuff in therapy, though he’s def still got a ways to go: I’m pretty sure Ben cares about me. He acts like he cares, like he’ll do stuff like put extra blankets in my quarters in the spaceship because I get cold real easily or track down those droid parts I need for a project and he always has my back in a fight but y’know it’d be nice to hear him say he loves me once in a while. Especially because we kinda had a rough start and idk I don’t think he wanted me around at first.

And uh. Obi-Wan definitely relates to that a bit too much, y’know?

I want to say that Young Obi ends up mentioning All That to one of the clones or Ahsoka later, because they seem probably invested in Anakin's well-being, even if Ben is, well, a Sith, so Obi-Wan's a little worried the man's affection really is fake, but at least Ahsoka...

(Ironic, given what Anakin's actual eventual Sith would-be-Master was like.)

Young Obi mentions Anakin’s most recent rant to Ahsoka, and she just goes "Wait, is that why Skyguy likes to sit by the throne and get called pet names?" "Uh... I don't... know... but it sounds like all of you have a LOT to unpack there, Miss Apprentice."

Later on: "Master Kenobi, you need to tell Skyguy you love him 'cause apparently he's been having a lot of emotions about you not telling him you care and he's been talking to mini-you about it whenever they get stuck together and--"

Young Obi-Wan is just constantly the "Now we don't have time to unpack all of that" John Mulaney gif. Anakin in particular is a mess, and young Obi-Wan slowly goes from "I want to date that" to "I want to study that" about him.

Obi-Wan gets stuck somewhere with Ben, tries to small talk, gets on the topic of Vader, and spills the drama. He gets an awkward “Thank you for bringing that to my attention.”

It’s followed by a fairly frustrated “I try, but Anakin refuses to communicate his needs to me, and it feels like I’m always falling short.”

At least one member of the group is in therapy, probably all of them, but they’re still using young Obi as a sounding board for all this stuff. On the bright side, this is probably good for impressing the importance of good communication on Obi-Wan.

Good for Obi-Wan! And... whatever Padawan he eventually has.

As for baby Anakin, who is approximately age four, I want to go with "Anakin decides to be his own uncle, and Shmi just rolls with it because fuck it, she’s not a slave anymore, and a Fake Sith is a solid defense against anyone trying to re-enslave them."

[This is a backstory I've had them use before (see here and here).]

Seeing Big Ani and Little Ani in the same space might be what finally pings the "oh shit, that's future me" thing for Obi-Wan... you know, if he’s ever allowed close enough to see Little Ani in the first place.

Little Ani stays with the fake-Sith and is sorta jointly trained by all of them, and young Obi-Wan teaches little 'Soka at the Temple. Ani and 'Soka still end up friends somehow, but it is fairly different.

Every time little Ani addresses Old Obi as "Dad," it's just like ten kinds of awkward. The one time someone tried to explain that Ben wasn't his new dad, Shmi glared them down. She is of the opinion that, all the gods be damned, Ani deserves to refer to the most mature man in his life, who raised another him in another timeline already, as a father.

Ani doesn't NEED a father, Shmi herself is more than enough, but he does deserve to have this if he wants it.

An alternative conclusion to the time travel is uh. So the Mandalorians are genetically identical (give or take a hair gene) and really resemble Jango Fett, though whether anyone notices that is up in the air. Then the three ‘Sith’ (two fake Sith and their morality chain tag-along) have three younger, identical copies show up….

It could be really weird cloning shenanigans. Now, it makes no sense that they’d make clones, and stagger their production like that, and leave them as babies on various planets for Jedi to find. IDK what reasons Obi-Wan would come up with for that, but it’s a fun little detour before he gets to time travel.

There's a really painful moment (for the audience, who know about canon Vader) where someone tries to convince Ahsoka to leave the Sith and she's just like "no way, they'd never hurt me!” Then she clarifies that “someone has to keep them from doing stupid Sith shit whenever they get bored, you know?"

A bunch of Jedi probably think she’s delusional, but the few that have seen her get into trouble that is legitimately too much for her, which isn't often, have then seen Anakin show up like the devil himself to save her, and it's like. Oh. This is why she isn't scared of them hurting her.

We’ve discussed how Anakin does get concerningly in character with the fake Sith thing. However, Anakin and Ahsoka are, just once in a while, surprised by how Ben gets sometimes when playing the bad guy.

After all, he stabbed a dude with a fork and threatened to eat him during his time as Hardeen…

He has the same dramatic streak as all the rest of the lineage. He can be vindictive and creepy and scary as fuck.

HOWEVER:

Obi-Wan: I know I'm supposed to be playing at evil right now, but how do we feel about me making that evil a little... fruity? Ahsoka: Fruity, master? Anakin, who knows where this is going: [buries face in hands] Obi-Wan: You know, the... [limp wrist] Ahsoka: ... Obi-Wan: I mean, I'm already bisexual and well-groomed, I can play it up.

What’s the point of being evil if you can’t be flamboyant?

Anyway, I had to put in a lot of thought for what to do with Rex and Cody, because there's a solid place for them in terms of strategy, but it doesn't do much to give them independent narrative arcs, and 'young Obi-Wan has a crush' isn't much of an arc, you know?

So, basic info first: Cody, Rex, and Anakin all hold the rank of General in this AU because, like... who else is gonna. Ahsoka remains a commander because everyone declares her Baby, and also to keep up the "I'm a morality chain" ruse.

Cody maintains a very stern and unyielding public persona, but the second they're behind closed doors, he's roughhousing with his little brother.

Rex has some fun pretending to be a sadist whenever he and Anakin have to team up, because hamming it up as an evil bastard in front of Jedi is actually really fun... but usually, he's a competent fucking professional.

Because here's the thing: someone has to be.

They both kind of hate the army they've gotten, because these people don't even have proper trigger discipline, let alone any actual discipline.

This army? Tragic. They hate it. Give them the clones.

They have to be drill sergeants for months before they have anything worth sending onto the field.

I think that might be how/when they end up reaching out to Jango. Like, the first inroad is absolutely "we're your clones from the future and you were a Shit Dad so you owe us," but then they actually talk him around into letting the Fake Sith hire him. He brings along all the Mandalorians he can get to answer his calls, and on suggestion from Those Mando Twins, joins the army Ben doesn't even want.

Darth Boring doesn't want an army! Unfortunately, Cody thinks that's stupid as hell, and is overruling Ben so they can actually work on this 'cleaning up the galaxy of slavery' thing with actual resources.

Cody and Rex are super competent, and it shows in their horrified disdain for the state of their troops.

Rex: Fucking natborns. Anyone who isn't in the know: What's a natborn? Rex: [leaves without answering] People: WHAT'S A NATBORN???

(I'm assuming that the word smush is harder to parse in Basic.)

I think young Obi-Wan's new crush on Cody should also be unrequited. Cody's just like... bemused. Very "Okay, then, that sure is an Affection you've decided on."

Cody and Anakin both: Sorry, it’d just be too weird. Obi-Wan: Why would it be too weird? Cody and Anakin: Reasons.

Rex has to deal with the "whyyyyy" from both his brother and his (former?) General.

Young Obi-Wan just likes cute boys that fight good! Is that so wrong???

Ahsoka: So since we're not officially Jedi anymore-- Obi-Wan: We're still Je-- Ahsoka: Can we date? Can I date now? I want to date someone before we go back to the Code. It's a classic life experience for most teenage girls, and I want to Have That Experience before we're back at the Temple. Obi-Wan: You're not... you can date, Ahsoka, that's not actually banned by the Code. I mean, you'd have to keep it casual, but-- Ahsoka: I CAN DATE!!!

(Great priorities, Ahsoka.)

An idea I'm toying with is that one of the clones ends up Legally Engaged to Satine for political reasons, and young Obi-Wan is just like ???? because not only can he not date the hot boys, but one of said hot boys has become Mr. Steal Yo Girl.

Young Obi-Wan is suffering, and Quinlan is the worst friend ever because Quinlan is laughing at him.

There is obviously the question of

"How would Satine ever end up agreeing to that, given what their public personas are like and all that? She puts duty ahead of personal feelings but all indications are that it’s a terrible decision both ways." (as stated by Tia)

Which, yes, I forgot to actually say that I was imagining Jango had declared "those twins" his heirs after telling people they were his younger* cousins. Because reasons.

* Jango is about 27 when they land in the past, and I’m going to say the accelerated aging ended after hitting physically twenty because no, I don’t want to deal with that. As far as anyone knows, Cody and Rex are about five years younger than Jango. They’re less than year apart, which isn’t very visible, and most people assume they’re identical twins (except Rex’s hair), and that Cody just looks slightly older because of the scar.

Darth Boring had convinced Satine that the way to keeping Mandalore peaceful was to work with Jango (because Darth Boring, which is not his actual title but it is what Ahsoka insists on calling him in private, has a vested interest in keeping Mandalore and all interested parties calm), and he... maybe accidentally set up a political marriage between her and one of the clones.

It wasn't on purpose! Satine never married in his timeline, okay, he didn't expect her to ever get married here, either! He didn't even suggest it! This just happened!

(I want to say that Cody would be more competent at having a political marriage? But IDK.)

Do I do the Satine thing? It has potential, but also it's a bit of a cop-out. Do I have Cody be a diplomatic representative for their pseudo-Sith empire? He could be, but I think he'd hate it. Do I have Rex date one the Chaos Entities (Anakin or Ahsoka), or is that too repetitive with my other works? THERE'S JUST TOO MUCH GOING ON.

Part of me wants Quinlan to get a crush on Cody, and the crush gets bigger specifically in response to the fact that Cody refuses to take him seriously and/or just doesn't give him the time of day.

Based on their one interaction in TCW, they probably let get along ok. Cody maybe likes him back, buuuuuuut internally he's just a little "you were tolerable at almost-forty; early twenties you is obnoxious."

Just imagine the absolutely puppyish attempts at gaining approval and Impressing The Hot Mando General. Quinlan keeps having vague daydreams of seducing someone to the side of the Light. He really leans into the bodice ripper fantasies of saving someone evil with the power of love! (And also the power of really good sex.)

Bant looks at Quin and Obi and wants to throw them both into the nearest pond because they're idiots, but on this topic they are the same flavor of idiot. She considers calling up Reeft and Garen to help her knock some sense into them.

Quinlan: Can I volunteer to go undercover to the Sith? The Council: No. Quinlan: ...what if I-- The Council: No.

Tholme tries to get Qui-Gon to commiserate over their Padawans getting obsessed with Hot Sith Boys, but Qui-Gon just finds the whole thing funny. He knows from the chats he has with Ben that Anakin feels so completely, utterly, incredibly awkward about all of this.

(Ben continues to hold to "Anakin brought this on himself.")

(Ben also “kidnaps” Qui-Gon a lot.)

Also, hey, at least Quinlan isn’t actually into hot Sith boys! He’s into hot Sith minions which is... probably a step up. At least Cody’s not a Sith himself!

It's a step in some direction but Tholme has no idea which one.

(Quinlan sees Cody in dress uniform once and just keeps the mental image for Ages. It’s in his dreams. Sometimes said dreams overflow to Tholme via Force Mind Magic and Quinlan wakes up to someone smacking his face with a pillow.)

Arguably, Quin's also a lot more romantic about his crush than Obi-Wan is, in this case. Quinlan: I want to save him... Obi-Wan: Hey, hey, cute boy. Look at me. Let’s bang.

Cody: There are currently two future Jedi generals having some form of absurd romantic fixation in my direction. I don't know how to feel about this. Rex: Bed them. Cody: ...I'm not saying that's not eventually an option, but one of them is the younger Kenobi, and I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that. Rex: Pat him on the head like a tooka and then bed his friend, it'll be funny.

I think the Quinlan thing and also general exasperation of leading an absolutely useless army can function pretty solidly as the basis for Cody, but I have another idea for Rex now.

Komari is currently brainwashed in a cult, yes? So.

I keep bouncing around back and forth on what to do with Rex, but part of me suddenly really likes the idea of, after Team Fake Sith finds and dissolves the cult (as one does), and takes Komari into custody (because she's dangerous and deeply unwell), Rex kind of ends up her touchstone to being a decent person. He’s not a morality chain, and it’s not really a redeemed-through-love thing, just This Is A Solid Dude who doesn't pity her or thinks she's irredeemable (however you choose to define such a thing), but actually relates to the kind of conditions living like that can involve, and just kind of...

I don’t know. I think Rex's arc in this AU could be very heavily grounded in something to the effect of "You're not the worst darksider I've met. You're not the only person who was in a cult. You're not even the only former Jedi I know that's committed awful, horrible crimes. My question is just this: What are you going to do moving forward?"

Later Anakin: Wait, who do we know that was in a cult? Rex: What did you think Kamino was?

(Rex isn't as chill as he'd like her to think, but he's trying, and she's fairly reliant on the Force to understand emotions, and is currently in nullifying cuffs, so he can bluff.)

Komari needs someone solid and dependable to rely on for at least conversation, and I think Rex needs to feel needed.

I’m not sure if it’d be romance or friendship, but I think there's a solid basis to work with, potentially.

Per Tia:

One thing about Rex and shipping is like. If you want to do Rexwalker again that's fine, but if you're worried about repetitiveness but still want to like. Ship him in a non-political-convenience way. Rexsoka here actually would be different than your other stuff.

I'm trying to figure out if I can make it work because Ahsoka thematically fits very much into a little sister shaped hole here? She feels younger than in other works, despite not actually being younger than she is in, say, Commander Buir. In those other fics, she has some time alone to function and prove herself independently of Anakin and Obi-Wan.

I usually pluck Ahsoka out at sixteen if I'm pulling her from TCW, so she's got most of her competence but hasn't gotten quite all the trauma yet. Commander Buir, in particular, also has baby-shaped Anakin for contrast.

That said, I can see a decent source of narrative conflict in her wanting to experiment with romance and all that, and Anakin trying to tell her she's too young.

A year into this whole time-travel mess, she wants to give the dating thing a shot, and it spirals into "You were only two years older than me when you got married!"

I think I could build a plot out of Ahsoka wanting to do these things, and Anakin as an audience insert not quite processing that she's old enough to make these decisions. If she's choosing to date Rex, whose age works out as being close to hers when one takes into account Kamino fuckery, and whom she trusts absolutely, it’s arguably extra weird for Anakin to be upset with it.

"Senator Amidala was five years older than you, and you married her when you were nineteen and had only really known her for a week! I can go on a date with a guy we both know is one of the most trustworthy people alive if I want, Skyguy!"

I can definitely see Ahsoka getting annoyed with Anakin being overbearing and controlling at some point before that unrelated to romance, too. It’s not exactly a new fault of his.

My god, just imagine someone snidely asking Anakin "where's your little shadow?" and Anakin, being Himself and also a Fake Sith, has an emotional breakdown about how Ahsoka yelled at him for micromanaging her and not trusting her to make her own decisions in life and so she got herself a multi-month solo mission from Ben that Anakin isn't allowed to know any details about, and--

It's another one of those "oh, you have PROBLEMS problems with your mental health" incidents for the Jedi to add to the file, because Anakin having emotionally charged rants about his issues at seemingly terrible times is how they get a lot of information.

Some of the rants are planned.

Many of them, actually.

They want the Jedi to know these things.

Just, well. Anakin.

He really is a little Like That.

On that note, I'm low-key imagining that Anakin gets put on mood stabilizers by the therapist in this context, and he's doing good! He's handling his issues! He's--been captured with Obi-Wan the Younger again and his medication was confiscated.

Anakin is... not great. He's a little out of practice managing his unmedicated self, and when adding withdrawal symptoms onto that... poor Anakin.

(Poor Obi-Wan.)

I think it would be best if Anakin makes a bunch of ominous blustery comments at their captors about how they won't like what's coming to them if they take his belongings (AKA the fanny pack that has his backup pills), and then Obi-Wan just gets to watch Anakin get more and more erratic, because like. Yes, Anakin is using the Force to compensate, but unfortunately he's mostly cut off, and the stress of the situation is pushing him away from depression and into the beginnings of a manic episode.

Anakin is aware of his issues to the point where he's mostly managing, and he keeps asking Obi-Wan "would it make sense for me to [slightly deranged, very impulsive action]," and Obi-Wan realizes he's being the morality sounding board for the Hot Sith because ??? reasons?????

Eventually, Anakin does flop back in bed and dramatically throws his arm over his eyes, and says he needs his meds back, he's absolutely going to lose it, and Obi-Wan tentatively asks what kind of medication. There are levels to worry about. Mild allergy medication is one thing, but heart medication that needs to be taken every four hours is another, you know? He wants to know how much panic is appropriate.

Anakin lets him know that it's Psychiatric In Nature. Obi-Wan suddenly realizes that he really, really, really doesn't want to know what a properly erratic, unmedicated Anakin is like.

(An unmedicated Anakin really isn't nearly as bad as Obi-Wan fears. Anakin's been dealing with this for a while, and knows what his issues are and some of how to deal with them. He'd need to be running on no sleep and higher levels of stress, or to have been drugged with something meant to increase his aggression, to really lose his shit and do something worthy of Vader. RotS levels of stress and sleep deprivation is required to pull RotS levels of manic paranoid delusion.)

Tia asked:

How long does it take the Jedi in general to catch on to how like. They have opportunities. But these Sith never seem to harm any Jedi. And it’s not just like, the past timeline parts of the disaster lineage. They probably get opportunities to hurt other Jedi. Ones that are less skilled at saber work. And more importantly ones that they don’t seem weirdly interested in."

I'm not sure, really. The Jedi don't spend as much time in the Outer Rim as they could, and that's where the Team operates, so actually running into them by accident is unlikely for anyone other than Shadows.

Fortunately, it's really easy to toy with Shadows with the excuse of "I want to see how long it takes before you Fall with us."

I do want like... okay. Here’s the mental image:

Qui-Gon calls them out on being Fake Sith pretty quickly, so Ben just sort of eyes him, dramatically, and orders out "Leave us" to all non-team people. The threat of torture is implied but not stated. He gestures with wine to keep in character. He definitely makes sure Young Obi-Wan is ushered out, so it's just five time travelers, Qui-Gon Jinn, and Ahsoka's immortal force birb.

"...so, what's the reason for the farce, Obi-Wan?" "How in all the hells did you figure it out so quickly?"

(Qui-Gon cheated a bit. He could feel the broken training bond that was never properly severed due to Traumatic Death Of A Master on Ben's end)

Ben didn't realize he'd feel it! Young Obi-Wan can't feel his older self or a training bond with Anakin or Ahsoka, so why could Qui-Gon?

IDK if there would be anything on the level of crying and hugging it out, but I think it would be very funny if, every time young Obi and Anakin are getting captured by pirates or something, Ben and Qui-Gon are just having a nice afternoon tea and checking their watches to see if their respective walking bundles of neuroses are done with their adventure yet.

The Council is So Done, because Qui-Gon continues to insist that they're Not That Bad, but every time anyone other than Qui-Gon brings up the friendship, Ben laughs and makes a comment about how absolutely gullible Master Jinn is.

Obi-Wan is skeptical of his own experiences with Anakin, at least, if only because he's skeptical about Anakin's everything.

"I don't know if Vader is telling me the truth. I don't know if he's telling himself the truth. I don't think he's a great source of information even when he thinks he's being honest."

Anakin could tell Obi-Wan the full and complete truth, and Obi-Wan would worriedly put a hand to his forehead and start doing tests for hallucinations and paranoid delusions. In his defense, this is a very reasonable assumption to make with an individual like Anakin. It's just also not accurate, this time. I don’t know if Anakin hallucinates in canon without a weird inciting incident like Force Nonsense or getting drugged by the enemy, but paranoid delusion is pretty much all of RotS.

"I’m your time-traveling padawan who’s pretending to be a Sith to catch some other Sith who’re going to start a galactic civil war and those Mandalorians you like are from a clone army based on a template of Jango Fett made to serve the Jedi (because that’s totally something he’d sign up for), and one of the Sith is your grandmaster but he doesn’t seem to have fallen yet, it’s probably fine," is hard to believe.

Honestly, even if he seemed stable before saying that, which he doesn’t, it’s all real far fetched. There's a lot going on and Obi-Wan wouldn't even begin to believe it without evidence.

I've had it in my head that he and Bant and Quinlan have been gossiping about the mess for months if not years about these idiots, and at one point it became common knowledge that Ben was a Kenobi, and Bant convinced them (since the two were among the most likely in the entire Order to encounter the Fake Sith) to get a DNA sample, probably hair or blood since that's easiest so they can figure out HOW these two are related, if they are, and then there's a whole big thing.

Bant: No, no, this must be contaminated, it's coming up as Obi-Wan! Are you sure you didn't accidentally grab some of your own hairs? I know it's a little long for most of your hair, but the braid-- Quinlan: Wait, they keep claiming stuff about cloning, right? Maybe someone's a clone? Check for artificial telomeres! Bant: ...okay, so, there aren't any artificial telomeres, but the ones from apparently-Ben are... a lot shorter... um... I don't know what to do with this. It's like I have two samples from the same person, twenty years apart. Quinlan: Obi-Wan, what's that face? Why are you-- Obi-Wan: Vader told me he was a time-traveler. I thought it was the fever talking, but...

That’s how he finds out that Ben is future-him before finding out about how he’s not evil!

"Master Jinn... I think... I think the Sith controlling the Outer Rim is me from the future." "Oh, you finally figured it out?" "I AM HAVING A CRISIS HERE."

Obi-Wan, after a few hours of dazed realization, runs screaming to Quinlan and Bant like 'GUYS GUYS THIS EXPLAINS WHY VADER KEPT SAYING IT WAS WEIRD AND THAT I LOOK LIKE HIS MASTER AND THAT IT WOULD BE LIKE DATING HIS DAD.'

You know, the important stuff.

I think Qui-Gon tells him that Ben isn't evil because, like, That Sure Is A Crisis Obi-Wan's Having. He could hold off for shits and giggles, sure, but Obi-Wan’s on the edge of something Really Concerning, mentally. Best help calm him down on at least one or two things.

Obi-Wan’s maybe still a little skeptical until he confronts them over it. Because their Sith act was real good and also like. Maybe Qui-Gon just wants to believe the best of his Padawan, y’know?

Quinlan runs into Ben before Obi-Wan does, after this whole mess, and gets to observe as money changes hands and people act like sore winners about bets made for When Does Obi-Wan Figure It Out.

Anakin was saying 'soon' because he really didn't think the fever-fueled rant would be discounted as easily as it was.

Cody was of the opinion that it would take at least a few more years since they're actually pretty damn good at this whole schtick.

Quinlan: Wow, he's... going to be really disappointed that you have such a low opinion of his intelligence. Cody, gesturing at Ben: Experience. Darth Ben: ಠ_ಠ

Cody just rattles off some of the Extremely Stupid Shit that Ben's done in their time working together.

Rex cheerily offers up "You didn't even realize General Skywalker was married, sir! And they weren't subtle!" "I knew they were together, I just didn--" "Everyone knew they were together, sir. Everyone."

(Rex had the lowest opinion of their deductive capabilities. He claims it would have taken until Baby Ahsoka showed up at the Jedi Temple.)

-Once Obi-Wan accepts that they're decent people after all- Obi-Wan: Wow, Anakin, you're real good at acting unhinged! Anakin: Haha. Yeah. Thanks?

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crystalessenceswrites · 4 years ago

Note

Hi Again! I was wondering if you wrote for the clones? (I'm thirsting for Wolffe!!) If not, that's ok! And if so, I thought maybe something fluffy and a bit hot with Wolffe? I'm a huge sucker for the trope- Reader tries to hide that she hasn't been feeling well and turns out she's pregnant? With twins! She's scared because even though they're committed, it wasn't planned? And then fluff and some love making?? <3333

Hi lovely, welcome back! I am open to writing for the clones, I just haven’t done so yet! I too thirst for Commander Wolffe so you’re in luck! This trope is def very cute, the end turned out more fluffy than spicy, I hope that's alright.

Commander Wolffe x fem!reader Rating: E (18+) Warnings: explicit sexual content, unprotected p in v sex, unplanned pregnancy, swearing (first time writing for Wolffe, may be slightly ooc)

[PART TWO]

There was never enough time. You really should not have been surprised by the revelation, you were at war, but it still sat heavy on your chest. Always needed elsewhere as soon as you completed a mission. Never time to rest, even in transit. Someone always needed your attention for reports, strategic planning or council meetings as the GAR cruiser hurtled through hyperspace. It never left you enough time for him. Thankfully, the stubborn nature of your clone commander allowed him to make time, even if just a spare moment, for the two of you.

“Oh fuck,” you throw your head back against the door as he reaches that spot deep inside you. Pushing you ever closer to the edge. “Wolffe, please-” you’re whining as he grinds up into you, throbbing inside you. He’s always had the uncanny ability to read your body, he knows better than you when you’re close to bliss and he enjoys drawing it out. To think Commander Wolffe was a fucking tease.

“Please what, cyare?” His smug grin slides across your chest following the trail of marks he’s littered across your skin where no one will see. “What does ner jetii need?”

“Please, ‘m so close,” you tighten your legs around his waist, trying to draw him in closer, anything to reach your release, “please, Wolffe!”

He groans into your neck as you tug at the curls fallen loose at the nape of his neck, “well when you ask so nicely, cyare.”

His sudden thrust up pushes the air from your lungs. Your mouth falls open in a silent scream as he pounds into you, all teasing forgotten. He’s relentless as you tighten around him, the coil in your belly threatening to snap.

“That’s it,” he grunts, “come on my cock ner jetii.”

His words and his gloved thumb brushing over your bundle of nerves has you falling apart around him. White hot pleasure rolls over you, leaving you a limp, moaning mess in Wolffe’s arms.

“That’s it, mesh’la. Squeezing me so kriffing tight,” he groans, hips stuttering, his own release fast approaching. “Fuck.” Wolffe manages a few more thrusts before he buries himself in you, spilling himself inside you. Whispered praises fall from his lips as he comes down from his own high. His lips ghost over yours in a chaste kiss as he withdraws, tucking himself away before he lets you down.

Your legs cry out in relief when they meet solid ground, not longer clinging to Wolffe for support.

“Good, cyare?” his hand sweeps over your brow, so tender for a man with such a fierce reputation, even amongst his brothers.

“Mhmm,” leaning into his touch, he chuckles at your blissed out expression.

“Someone’s bound to come looking for you soon, General. Let’s get you cleaned up.” You don’t protest as he helps you redress, though you do moan about how unfair it was he just had to remove his codpiece and you had to strip completely out of your robes for these little storage closet rendezvous’.

“I don’t think jedi robes were designed to allow for easy access, cyare.”

You pout, “you’re probably right.” There was that whole bit about no attachments you were blatantly ignoring after all.

Before the commander can come back with another sharp retort your commlink blinks to life. “Yes?”

“General, General Plo is looking for you on the bridge.”

You sigh, “thank you, Sinker. I’ll be right there.”

Never enough time.

The next couple of months continue much the same. You and Wolffe sneaking away between missions when you can, trying to find solace in each other despite all the horrors you both see on the battlefield. In a war that seems to stretch on forever he is your rock. As he watches his brothers fall, one after the other, you are his comfort. It breaks your heart to be apart from him but there is little you can do to control it. When the council requests you to join Obi-wan and Anakin for a series of missions you cannot object. Instead, you drag your tired self out to the far reaches of the outer rim to help them as best you can.

“You look exhausted, my dear.” Such tact this one possessed.

You roll your eyes, “you don’t look much better, Kenobi.” Though you doubt he has been waking in the middle of the night to empty the contents of his stomach like you have for the past week.

“This war does seem to be pushing us all to our limits.”

“I’ll race you!” Ahsoka sprints by, apparently headed for some target or another with her master hot on her heels.

“Snips!”

Cody chuckles under his bucket, shaking his head as the two disappear into the distance.

Obi-Wan scrubs a hand over his face, “it’s pushed most of us to our limits.”

“What I wouldn’t give to have the energy of a padawan again,” you groan.

“I agree wholeheartedly,” Obi-wan nods, “we should all try to get some rest while we can. We need to break camp near dawn.”

You agree and bid your fellow jedi an early goodnight. With the headache you could feel coming on, sleep sounded like a good idea. As you go to stand the world spins around you, any sense of balance you had gone. You reach for the crate you had been sitting on to try and stay upright but you miss by a mile. Knees giving out you collapse to the floor, the world around you still spinning. You can barely hear Cody shouting over the ringing in your ears.

“Call for a medic! The General’s collapsed!”

By the time you regain consciousness you’re no longer planet side. Obi-wan had been quick to have you medevacked to the closest med-station for testing. The unholy white lights of the station burn your eyes when you finally come to. Your sudden groaning draws Kix back to your bedside.

“General. Good to see you’re back with us.”

“Kix?” You try to focus on the 501st medic instead of the bright lights, “what happened?”

“You collapsed back at the forward camp. We weren’t able to determine what was wrong with the limited medical supplies we had on hand, so General Kenobi called an air lift for you.”

Another groan bubbles up, Obi-wan had been forced to waster precious resources on you. “Were you able to find out what’s wrong?”

The clone’s face falls, “yes.”

You’ve never heard the medic sound so meek before. “Kix?”

“I’m not sure what’s the best way to explain this, General… but you’re pregnant.”

Oh.

“H-how far along?”

“Looks like just over two months,” Kix shifts from foot to foot, pointedly not looking you in the eye. You can’t blame him for being uncomfortable, this isn’t quite the medicine he’d been expecting to practice. He was a combat medic not an obgyn. “We were able to get an ultrasound, would you like to see?”

Nodding, you sit up, your head now spinning for completely different reasons. Kix brings you a datapad displaying the grainy black and white image.

“Kix… am I seeing this right?”

“Yes, general.”

“There’s two…”

“Yes general. You’re having twins.”

Oh fuck.

Kix is a godsend, having worked with Anakin and Rex long enough to know reporting everything may not always be a good idea. The official report on your sudden collapse reads that you suffered from a foreign infection your body had not been prepared to fight, coupled with the battle fatigue, your body had shut down in order to force you to rest. Obi-wan and the council believe it, ordering you back to Coruscant to recover and rest. You knew you would have to tell them; it would not be long until you were showing, but you would much rather deal with the council in person than from your medbay bed.

Before your escort arrives, Kix slips you a disk with a copy of the ultrasound pictures, “in case there’s someone you want to show them to.”

“Thank you, Kix,” he blushes when you give him a quick peck on the cheek, “you’ve done more for me than you’ll ever know.”

You do your best to rest on your trip back to Coruscant but its incredibly difficult when your mind is going a parsec a minute. Besides the council there’s one other person you have to break the news to. While you two had talked about what life would be like for the two of you after the war, this was not something you had discussed. You were not sure if Wolffe wanted kids ever, let alone now. Having twins while the whole galaxy was at war was not ideal. Not when the two of you were expected to put your lives on the line for the Republic.

Panic washes over you when you arrive at the capital to find the wolfpack waiting for you on the tarmac. They’d just arrived back for some long overdue shore leave and Plo had informed them of your sudden illness. Normally you would be touched by how much they cared for you, but now all you can think about is how you are not ready to face Wolffe. Not yet.

You can feel his gaze heavy on your back as you field Sinker and Boost’s barrage of questions.

“I’ll be alright, I just need to take my medicine and get some rest. It shouldn’t be long before I’m right as rain again.” You hate lying to them, but you did not want them worrying unnecessarily either.

It seems to appease them; the pack wishes you well and invites you out to 79’s with them as soon as you’re recovered. Wolffe hangs back, watching his brothers go.

“I’ll walk you back, general.”

“No.” It comes out much harsher than you’d like. The surprise that washes over his face feels like a stab to your gut. “There’s no need, Commander. I’ll be alright.”

His voice drops, brow furrowed together, “cyare?”

“Not now, Wolffe,” you frown, “I just need to go lay down. We’ll talk later.”

But you don’t. You cannot find it in yourself to answer any of his calls or messages over the next few days. Instead, you wrap yourself up in as many blankets as possible and hole up in your quarters while you try to figure out what to do. You watch Coruscant go by from your window. It’s only when Sinker and Boost call that you’re freed from running around in circle inside your head.

“Boost? Sinker? What’s going on?”

“Oh thank goodness you’re alive, General!”

“Boost what are you going on about?”

“The Commanders been going crazy! He hasn’t heard from you in over a week and we don’t think he knows how to handle it!”

Although you and Wolffe did your best to keep your relationship hidden, in such tight quarters it was hard to keep it from Wolffe’s brothers. You’d never outright admitted it to them, but you figured they understood what was going on. You were glad for it now.

“I’ve seen him pace before, but never like this,” Sinker adds.

Oh Maker. “Where is he?”

“The barracks, General.”

“I… I’ll speak with him, alright? Hopefully that will calm him down.”

“Thank you, General! We were running out of ways to distract him!” That was the kind way of saying ways to annoy him to keep Wolffe’s mind off you.

“Thank you, Boost, Sinker.”

“Good luck, General!”

You were going to need it. This was not a conversation to have over the com so you make your way down to the barracks, doing your best to avoid attention when you can. It was not like you weren’t allowed there, but the last thing you needed was more questions.

Boost and Sinker were not lying about the pacing. Punching in the access code to his quarters reveals a tightly wound Wolffe, pacing back and forth across the length if the tight space. His armor has been haphazardly discarded around the room. You’re surprised he hasn’t worn a path into the floor yet.

“General?” Surprise and then relief fall over his face when he catches you standing in the doorway.

“Wolffe, I-”

“What are you doing here? You’re supposed to be resting.”

You’re thrown off by the sudden cold tone in his voice. “I-I came to explain, Wolffe… to apologize.”

“Apologize?”

“I’ve been avoiding you Wolffe,” your voice cracks despite your best efforts to remain calm, “and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have, I just needed to find a way to tell you and I couldn’t.”

His frown deepens, “tell me what?”

“That I’m pregnant.”

“What?” He looks at you live you’ve grown another head.

“I’m pregnant, Wolffe.”

It takes him a moment to wrap his mind around your words, but you can see the instant he does, his mouth dropping into an ‘o�� as his jaw falls slack.

“You’re pregnant? With my… with my baby?”

“Babies,” you correct.

His brain seems to sputter out again, “babies?”

You nod, “twins.”

Before you can blink, he’s got you wrapped up in his arms, spinning you around the room. “Twins. You’re having twins.”

It takes everything you have not to start bawling. Kriffing hormones. You’ve never seen Wolffe this happy. This was beyond any reaction you could have imagined. The awe on his face when he sets you down makes your heart melt.

“This is why you were sent back? Your sudden illness?”

“Well yes… but Kix’s report was that I had an infection. I wanted to talk to your first before anyone else. I just didn’t know how.”

His warm hand oh-so-gently cups the side of your face. You lean into the touch. After even just a few weeks apart you’re starving for him.

“Why were you worried, cyare?”

“We’d never talked about kids. And we’re in the middle of a war. Not to mention we’re not even supposed to be together on the first place… I didn’t know how you’d react…”

His face softens, his amber eye drifting down to your nonexistent bump. “I’ll admit, I’m surprised. It may not be how either of us hoped, but it is a pleasant surprise.”

“Really?”

“Really, cyare.” You cannot help but smile as he pulls you in for a kiss. His lips slanting against your own as he holds you close. “I know there may be somethings we need to work out, but we’ll take it one step at a time,” he murmurs against your lips, hands tracing patterns across your back. “We’ll figure it out together.”

#commander wolffe x reader #wolffe x reader #clones x reader #wolffe imagine #the clone wars #tcw #the wolfpack #nsft #smut #request #crystalessences writes

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shatouto · 3 years ago

Text

bare his neck on the execution block

[gen fic, 2.5k. obi-wan and anakin discusses ahsoka’s apprenticeship early on. vent fic + character study, sort of. read on ao3]

“…I can’t do this anymore.”

Obi-Wan glances up. Anakin has uttered those words so quietly, so unlike his usual tone of voice when he is upset in some ways. There is none of that off-kilter lilt of minor irritation, nor the somber reverberation of suppressed but boiling rage in his voice. He sounds… defeated, the resignment almost nothing like Obi-Wan has heard before – and that is saying something, considering the ten-odd years they have broken bread and shared quarters and matched blades. Concern sinking coldly in his stomach, he stands up, paces over and settles beside his former apprentice, setting a hand on Anakin’s back in a tentative offer of comfort.

Anakin doesn’t really respond, just slumps lower, his forehead propped against his fingers, his face hidden behind his hands. Obi-Wan keeps his frown to himself, merely brushing his hand up and down Anakin’s back. He has a thousand guesses as to what Anakin means exactly, and no less than nine hundred of them would pertain to this grueling war that has covered their life in a grey pall. But assumptions are the enemy of comprehension; one who speculates will judge instead of listening at all, whereas Obi-Wan strives to be a good listener first and foremost. So he merely asks, “Would you like to talk about it, Anakin?”

Anakin lets out a slightly shuddery sigh. Obi-Wan studies him for another few moments of a silence that is not quite tense, just somewhat suffocating, like the humid air before a rainstorm. His eyes wander from the guarded curve of Anakin’s shoulders to the exhausted slouch of Anakin’s back. Between the back armor plate and ringlets of baby hair at the base of his skull, a pale strip of skin is exposed where his neck slopes like a prisoner bowing over the execution block. Obi-Wan shudders and pushes the intrusive macabre image all the way down to the bottom of his mind. He must focus on the here and now, especially the irregular pulses that spread from Anakin’s signature into the fabric of the Force around him like the throb of a dull ache.

“Ahsoka…” Anakin trails off just as he begins, but the fact that he opened up at all is already a relief. Obi-Wan says nothing, only brings his hand up to cover Anakin’s nape, giving it a grounding squeeze, in a way shielding it from the phantom blade that still haunts his mind’s eye. A minuscule intake of breath – too sharp, too much like the ghost of a sob for Obi-Wan’s liking – preludes Anakin’s wavering voice.

“I can’t—can’t train her, Master.”

Obi-Wan blinks, brows shooting up in surprise. Anakin and his own Padawan haven’t had the easiest of beginnings – what with Yoda’s doublespeak orders that led to misunderstandings and unpleasant surprises on the part of young Master and Padawan both – but Obi-Wan was almost sure that they have smoothed things out between them since. He doesn’t doubt Anakin’s care for his apprentice and Ahsoka’s respect for him likewise.

“I was under the impression that Ahsoka has been making great progress under your tutelage,” Obi-Wan says in a hushed tone, tilting his head down a little, not to force eye contact with Anakin but simply to suggest Anakin to turn to him. “What makes you say so?”

“Everything,” Anakin grits out at once, his voice taking on a watery edge. He slumps down lower, full on burying his face in his hands now, and Obi-Wan’s heart twists. “She’s been making progress because she’s just that good, Master. I didn’t do anything… She’s already trained in the reverse grip before I even taught her anything, remember?” Anakin gives a brittle laugh, breathless and humorless and fooling no one, least of all himself.

Obi-Wan bites the inside of his lips, his forehead creasing deeply in frowns as he shifts closer and slides his arm around Anakin’s shoulders in reassurance. “Lightsaber techniques are not nearly everything about being a Jedi, and you know it, Anakin. She needs a Master—”

“Then I’m not what she needs! I’m not a Master!” Anakin’s voice climbs to a near-cry. He takes in a shaky, stuttery breath and suddenly turns towards Obi-Wan, his eyes red-rimmed and downcast, a miserable frown etched into the downturned corners of his mouth. “I can’t pretend to be one anymore. I can’t take this anymore!”

Anakin’s pain pierces through his word and lodges into Obi-Wan’s heart as well. “Anakin…”

“There’s so much to do. I have to lead my battalion, I—I have to fight this war. We all have to, but I… I don’t know! I can’t do so many things at once! I can’t do right by her like this,” Anakin continues, sniffling, his flesh hand clawing into his gloved one so hard that his fingers blanch from the pressure. “I’m just—I just got Knighted this year, I don’t know anything about this. Aayla is even older than me. Why did <i>I</i> have to be the one to take on a Padawan? What, am I the only Knight in the Order who’s available to take an apprentice? I don’t get it. Anybody could have taught her better than I do.”

“Anakin, that isn’t true—”

“Oh, don’t give me that,” Anakin unceremoniously cuts him off, his voice dripping with dismissal and disdain – at himself. He glares up and flinches back as soon as he meets Obi-Wan’s eyes as though only realizing then what he has been trying to hide. His gaze immediately drops, but by then Obi-Wan already saw the furious tears in his eyes. “Don’t lie just to reassure me,” Anakin mutters, roughly dragging his hand over his eyes. “Anybody else would’ve been better for her. You know that, the Council knows that, Ahsoka knows that.”

Anakin droops completely, and Obi-Wan finds it somehow both relieving and alarming that Anakin isn’t pushing off. Anakin’s need for comfort – physical comfort, especially – is nearly always at war with Anakin’s need to prove himself capable of handling everything on his own. This certainly isn’t unique to him; what is unique to him is the intense manner in which he feels, no less aggravated by the expectations that he carries on his shoulder and his incredible attunement to the Force. This is not the first time Anakin has broken down in tears from the stress of it all – his words, in fact, distinctly remind Obi-Wan of that one occasion, years ago, where he begged Obi-Wan to quiet the noise in his mind and take away the burden of being the Chosen One – but the pain it brings to Obi-Wan’s chest is the same.

“I’m sorry, Padawan mine,” Obi-Wan murmurs, squeezing Anakin lightly. He regrets making light of it when it turned out that Ahsoka was to be assigned to Anakin instead of him, to the young Knight’s surprise. He regrets taking it for granted that Anakin would just find a way to get along with this fourteen-year-old Padawan – an adolescent chock in the middle of her rebellious years and prone to challenging any authority, especially the one closest to her, the most insecure and inexperienced figure of authority, the easiest one to snip and quip at. At least when he took on Anakin as a Padawan himself, Anakin was only nine – unsure and outright frightful of his new life, but sweet and earnest – which allowed Obi-Wan a period of respite before the boy’s childish idolatry turned into a teenager’s testiness and brooding.

It’s easy to see Anakin as older than the nineteen-year-old he is; easy to believe him as capable and competent as he tries to prove himself to be; easy to consider him as bearing the full responsibility of a Jedi Knight and more, for being a prodigy, for having accomplished what he had. It’s much harder – and much more painful, especially for him who loves Anakin so – to dwell over and over on the fact that Anakin struggles in ways that one can neither fathom nor help with. There are burdens Anakin cannot share with him, phantom blades that will hurt Anakin only even if Obi-Wan volunteers to bare his neck on the execution block in his stead.

“I’m sorry,” Obi-Wan repeats. “I did not know you were suffering. I should have stood up for you – and I would, had you objected the apprenticeship.” He pauses for a moment, rubbing up and down Anakin’s arm in soothing motions. “Why did you not say anything?”

Anakin leans limply against him, the remaining tension in his body suggesting exhaustion rather than relaxation. Obi-Wan simply holds up that weight with his own. He has always thought of it this way: if he cannot bear his former Padawan’s burden for or with him, then the least he could do is to provide shelter, absorb his hurt, cushion his fall. He would embrace Anakin’s fire with both arms until all the stars in the universe have burned out, and even then.

“I didn’t want to,” Anakin shudders out the words, turning and hiding his face in the crook of Obi-Wan’s shoulder like he’s a Padawan again and Obi-Wan welcomes the gesture like ocean waves cradling the setting sun. Anakin often hid in closets or even cracks in the wall as a child – until he apparently discovered that the safest hiding place in the universe was where he could tuck his head under his Master's chin and let himself be covered by Obi-Wan's great billowing sleeves. “Didn’t want to hurt her feelings. She’d feel rejected,” Anakin mumbles. “And… I don’t know. It felt like a mission – being her Master, I mean. I don’t—I don’t want to refuse a mission.”

“Anakin, you…” Obi-Wan lays his cheek atop Anakin’s head, letting his eyes fall shut for a moment in frustration at himself. Inane question, Kenobi. Of course he would not even try to say no to the Grandmaster’s order. This is not the time to think about who to blame, yet Obi-Wan cannot help feeling immediately at fault. He knows and has always known Anakin to be this way, ruled by not only pride but a deep-seated fear of being seen as anything less than utterly competent and fearless. He knows better than most, and so he should have known better. Of all people, he should have been the one to check on Anakin, discuss his feelings with him, speak up for him.

And how hard must it have been? How hard was it to earn the respect of someone barely five years your junior? How hard was it to assert your authority over someone you would rather just be a good friend to, just because you need to prove yourself to the authority above you? How hard was it to do all of that while trying to grow into the too-large mantle of General of the Republic, at the age of nineteen?

“Forgive me, Anakin,” Obi-Wan whispers, shattering inside out – from guilt and in empathy. “You are not wrong – it was a difficult and awkward situation you were in. I’m truly sorry. I wish I had come to your aid sooner.”

“I feel like I never got to be a Knight,” Anakin mumbles into the crook of his neck, his voice nasal and dangerously close to cracking. The confession is a bolt to Obi-Wan’s heart. It was how he’d felt as well, when he took Anakin under his wing immediately after his hasty graduation that followed Qui-Gon’s death. But at least it was a choice he made himself – a choice he doesn’t at all regret, looking back. He can say so with surety and fondness. Can Anakin even say so about his own apprentice? Anakin didn’t have any say in the matter to begin with. Even if he has grown close to Ahsoka, he is clearly tormented by the responsibilities that have been thrust upon him.

“It’s not like I don’t like her,” Anakin adds all of a sudden, shuffling up a little bit, clearly disquieted by Obi-Wan’s pensive silence. “She’s brilliant, I just… I’m going to fail her. I know I will. I’m not you. I wouldn’t have been able to do this even if I were twenty-five and she was nine.”

“Anakin, no,” Obi-Wan firmly hushes, frowning. Comparisons hurt. A comparison without context can poison self-perception like nothing else. He wraps his arms tighter around Anakin. “Please do not say such things. We are different – because we are different people. Look—Can you look at me, Padawan?”

He cradles Anakin’s face, and Anakin looks up through matted, darkened lashes, slightly biting down on his lower lip. With a tone as gentle as he can possibly muster, Obi-Wan speaks.

“If you’re thinking you aren’t capable of being a Master, or a good Master, then I assure you that isn’t true. I have seen your capacity for teaching, both in your methods and the results thereof. You have made progress just as Ahsoka did. I have faith in you, Anakin. However”—Obi-Wan absentmindedly wipes half a droplet of tear at the corner of Anakin’s scarred eye with the pad of his thumb—“what matters is whether you want to continue this apprenticeship. You are capable, but being capable of doing something doesn’t necessarily mean you have to force yourself to do it. Do you understand?”

Anakin watches him with a wariness that has Obi-Wan’s heart aching almost physically. It pains him so, when Anakin feels the need to tread carefully when speaking to him; he’d rather Anakin balk and brag and act brash than this. “I do, Obi-Wan,” Anakin utters syllable by syllable, chewing on his lip. “I just—don’t know. I don’t know what to do.”

His voice is rough and fragile at the same time, tearing at the raw edges like a gauze that Obi-Wan wishes he could singlehandedly hem. Anakin looks drained, with circles under his eyes that suggest he would’ve looked ashen if it wasn’t for the flush of fury and frustration from earlier, and puffed-up eyelids that look ready to shut for the rest of the day. Obi-Wan holds back a sigh and brushes Anakin’s hair from his face, tucking it behind his ear.

“That’s alright, Padawan mine,” he says, prompting Anakin to draw closer to him with a light touch. Thankfully, Anakin does, and finally wraps his arms around Obi-Wan in a returning embrace this time. “That’s quite alright. You don’t have to decide everything right now. You can take your time and rest – you’ve done enough.”

Anakin lets out a sigh so deep that Obi-Wan can physically feel the way his chest constricts against his own body. He wraps Anakin’s signature with his presence in the Force, lighting up candle after candle in the gloomy aftermath of the hurricane. Anakin shudders, and whispers. “Thank you, Master.”

“Anytime, dear one,” Obi-Wan says against the crown of his head, softly stroking his hair. “I’m here. I’ll be here.” And I will stay by your side for as long as you will have me. Here I am and here I shall remain, be it to hold up the night sky before it crumbles in your chest or patch up the stars that burn and bleed from invisible blades. I will, until the day I cannot do it any longer.

#anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #shatou writes #star wars prequels #canon is indeed questionable don’t you think

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ficsnooneaskedfor · 3 years ago

Text

Call the Twi'lek Midwife

Chapter 37: Trust

Word count: 6k (as I've mentioned, I think I'm moving towards longer chapters, so 5-6k might be the norm now)

Chapter summary: Ahsoka talks to Citali about what has been happening to her before Citali attends to Crosshair again. Despite his best efforts, Citali continues to charm him and motivates him to be an active participant in his recovery.

TW: death mention, blood mention, and birth mention.

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"So you do know who I am," Ahsoka said as she walked towards her, Morai still perched on top of Citali's shoulder. Citali looked at the ground embarrassed. She hadn't meant to call Ahsoka by her real name but after what had just happened, she wasn't thinking clearly. Ahsoka smiled at her, hoping to put her at ease. It was surprising her how much she'd grown to care for this woman in such a short time, but Citali seemed to have that effect on people. Citali showed so much love and care for those around her with even the smallest of gestures, it was almost impossible not to feel some level of affection for her. "It's okay, I'm not upset," Ahsoka said truthfully. "I was going to tell you who I was anyway because...I've sensed what's been happening to you."

"What...what is it?"

Ahsoka knew she would want answers. It was why she spent a good part of the day meditating and reading, hoping one would reveal itself. She still didn't have any, just more questions. "Honestly, I'm not sure," she said regretfully. "These feelings you've been having today, is it the first time?" Citali nodded her head and sniffled, still trying to calm herself from crying. "Can you tell me about them?" Perhaps more information would enlighten them both.

"It...happened this morning, just before the first time Morai appeared," Citali said, stroking the bird's feathers as she remained perched on her shoulder. "I was pulling up the plants to make Crosshair's medicine. It was like...like I could actually feel the plants, insects, and birds around me. Like we were all connected." she said, almost not believing it herself. Were Ahsoka not a Force-user, Citali might never have spoken a word about the experience, even to Echo. It sounded too fantastical to be believed, but something in Citali told her Ahsoka would understand.

"What did that feel like? In your body I mean," Ahsoka asked, wondering if her connection to the Force felt similar to her own.

Citali shuffled her feet into the ground, almost hoping to feel the sensations again. "I'm not sure I can describe it."

"I know it's difficult to put into words, but give it a try." Ahsoka gave her another reassuring smile and Citali took a breath, closed her eyes, and allowed the memory of it to take hold of her as Ahsoka pulled a chair over to sit beside her.

"It almost...tingled. I felt it all over me but especially in my hands and feet when they were touching the ground. I felt it in my lekku too. There were vibrations in the earth...but they were so gentle that if I was distracted, I'm not sure I would have noticed. It happened again a few minutes later when I left some food underneath the tree for Morai, but that time it was much stronger. Like it was too much for my mind and body to handle. And just now..." Citali looked at Ahsoka, wondering if she was going to think she was losing her mind. She wiped away her lingering tears and though she was apprehensive, she was strangely calm now. "I felt it again when Morai let me touch her but it was even more intense and...I was having visions...hallucinations...I'm not sure what they were. I was seeing things in my mind but they were so vivid it was like I was seeing them with my eyes. And Morai...she was glowing."

"Glowing?" Ahsoka hadn't seen Morai glowing herself but the thought was driven from her mind when something struck her that was just as peculiar. "Wait...how do you know her name, Citali?"

Citali looked stunned herself when it dawned on her. "I...I don't know. I just do."

Ahsoka stared at Morai for a moment but the convor was stubbornly not revealing anything to her. What are you up to? Ahsoka said in her mind to the bird but Morai only hooted, acknowledging she'd heard Ahsoka's thought. "What else did you see in these visions?"

Citali knew that Jedi and other Force-users sometimes experienced visions, but what she was about to say next might seem strange even to Ahsoka. "There was a dark pool of water that...somehow bestowed knowledge on people. Then there were three beings on a planet very far away. They appeared almost human but I knew they were...something else. They were ancient and very powerful, but in different ways. There were two men, an older one who was very sad and a young man so filled with hatred and anger...it was almost painful to look at him. His eyes...they were red."

Citali looked at Ahsoka, trying to gauge her reaction but there was none, except a slight softness in her eyes expressing concern. Despite her nearly neutral expression, Ahsoka was in awe. "Go on, Citali."

"The third being was a woman," Citali said as a pensive look came over her features and she reached for Morai again. "She was beautiful, kind, selfless, and...full of light. It made her glow, just like Morai did. The light inside the woman was...it was almost like it was calling to me. Pulling me in."

The more Citali spoke, the more astounded Ahsoka was. Citali however was beginning to wonder if there was a logical explanation for what had happened to her. That perhaps the stress of the rescue mission, the nearly crushing weight of grief and responsibility she'd been feeling since Anaasa's anatomy scan was affecting her mind and perception of reality. It had happened before but never like this. Citali was almost afraid to tell Ahsoka what she saw next.

"Then I saw you," Citali said looking into Ahsoka's eyes and turning her body towards her. "But you were younger and you looked like...like you'd been poisoned or something. Whatever it was, it somehow forced you to attack two men. They didn't want to hurt you, I could feel how much they loved you." Ahsoka's heart nearly broke when she heard that and Citali knew her words had unintentionally hurt her. "Then the woman died," Citali said mournfully. "But when she did, you were healed. It all happened so quickly, I couldn't really understand what I was seeing. But the emotions everyone was feeling...that I was able to perceive very clearly." Citali sighed and shook her head. "I'm sure this isn't making any sense."

"You're making perfect sense to me," Ahsoka assured her. She took a look in the kitchen window to see Wrecker, Melita, and the baby at the table, all blissfully unaware of what was happening in the garden. "You spoke of Morai appearing to you in a dream, can you tell me more about it?"

Citali told her again about the women during the climb up and her mother being at the summit. Then she told her of the storm and how it caused a forest fire before rain began putting the fire out. How her mother spoke of the "darkness" that covered the galaxy, how she knew Citali had sensed its rise. That when Citali sought guidance over what to do about it, her mother told her there was "power in healing people" that Citali would come to understand. That she and the rest of her family "had a part to play" and they would all help each other figure out what that was. And that just before waking, her mother told her everyone was on their way home and Citali knew it was true.

"You must think I'm crazy," Citali said as she got up from her chair to check on the medicine, Morai hopping down to sit on Ahsoka's chair. She gave it a quick stir and sat back down. "Maybe I am going crazy. It's...been a rough few weeks."

Ahsoka could sense how drained Citali was. "I know this has been a hard time for you," Ahsoka said understandingly. "Echo and the others...they told me about your patient and what you've been trying to do. But you aren't going crazy Citali, of that I'm certain. Did Echo or the others tell you about the rescue mission?"

Citali shook her head. "All I know about it is what I needed to know to treat everyone's injuries. Echo hasn't been ready to talk about it yet."

Ahsoka looked at the mountain range miles and miles away, the sun just beginning to set behind it. "So...no one has told you about the mountain?"

"Mountain?" Ahsoka nearly laughed as she'd had the same reaction when she first heard Citali speak of her dream.

Ahsoka told her every detail from the mission she could remember but especially of the dark presence on the mountain and how it had filled them all with dread as they climbed. "I don't know what it was, but there was great evil within that mountain. Dark objects, maybe even beings using the Dark Side of the Force, I'm not certain. Whatever it was, it made it hard for us to focus, even me. But there was this calming presence that came over all of us as we climbed. It was gentle and loving, I didn't know what it was. Even when we couldn't feel it inside the facility, the memory of it helped us carry on. Focusing on it cleared Hunter's mind enough that he was able to use his enhanced senses to locate Crosshair. I recognized that presence, that connection the moment you and I met. Because it was you."

Citali's eyes widened, trying to find a reasonable explanation for it but she had none. "I...I don't understand. How could something like happen?"

"Through the Force," Ahsoka said simply.

Citali was instantly filled with terror. Was she a Force-user and had somehow never realized it? She wasn't sure how that could be possible. There was a time she would have given almost anything to have the powers the Jedi possessed. When they were children, she and Melita used to pretend they were Jedi as many children across the galaxy did, waving sticks around imagining they were lightsabers, pretending leaves blowing in the wind were moving because of the Force. But Citali wasn't a child any longer and with the rise of the Empire, her thoughts immediately turned to her family and the danger such powers would put them in. It was one thing to "harbor" clone deserters, or even Ahsoka with her powers, but to be a Force-user herself was another. She was already making a plan to leave her family behind for their safety when Ahsoka reached over and held her hand. Ahsoka could sense the tremendous fear within her.

"Citali...you do have some sort of connection to the Force, that much is clear. But you don't need to fear it. It's very different than the connection I or other Force-users have to it. The Empire is searching the galaxy for beings like me, but I assure you, you are safe. This connection you have is so gentle and subtle, Force-users would have difficulty identifying it. And it's so..." Ahsoka wasn't sure what words to use to describe it. "It's so warm and...pure...I'm not sure someone consumed by the anger and hate of the Dark Side could sense it, even if they were right beside you. Being near you, I barely did. You won't have to shoulder the burden I carry." Ahsoka meant for the words to be comforting but she could feel Citali's sadness for her when she said it.

"The Force is...complicated," Ahsoka continued. "It's an energy field produced by all living things. Some beings are more strongly connected to it than others, but every living thing: you, me, Morai, even the plants and insects in this garden, are connected to it. There is a misconception that one must be a Jedi to use the Force, or for the Force to have a purpose for them, but that's not true. A wise Jedi Master once told me..." Ahsoka wasn't going to say his name but it felt wrong not to. Just because he was dead, didn't mean he had to be forgotten. "His name was Plo Koon. He was the one who found me and brought me to the Jedi Temple. He told me once that Force-sensitivity exists on...a spectrum of sorts. That it isn't an all-or-nothing sort of thing. In the time of the Republic, there were only 10,000 Jedi Knights out of the quadrillions of beings in this galaxy. But an unknown number have marginal levels of Force-sensitivity, many never even realizing it. Possibly billions or more, there's no way to know how many. They could train all day, every day for the rest of their lives and still not be able to do the things a Jedi youngling can, but that doesn't mean the connection isn't there. Some animals are even strong in the Force, loth-cats being one of them," Ahsoka said as she looked in Citali's bedroom window, Snowball watching all of them.

"Beings with this kind of connection to the Force may not be able to levitate objects, wield a lightsaber proficiently, or perform mind-tricks," Ahsoka continued. "But the Force may be strong enough in them so they have quicker reflexes, instincts about people, or a strong sense of intuition. They often become extraordinary pilots, capable warriors, even mystics. I believe it can enhance the natural gifts one possesses. And in you...I'm only speculating but perhaps the Force strengthens the connections you have with other living things. Makes them feel safe with you, helps you be even more perceptive of the emotions and intentions of others, particularly the people you love and care for. Maybe it even helps you anticipate problems before they arise, which I'm assuming would be a very useful skill for a midwife."

Citali had relaxed once she learned she and her family weren't in danger but Ahsoka could tell she was still uncertain about all of this. Citali had always believed the Force or some kind of higher power existed but the logical, scientific side of her mind was having a hard time taking this in. "You seem like you're having a hard time believing all of this," Ahsoka said.

"To be honest, I am," Citali said. She'd always been able to connect with people, figuring out what level of touch they were comfortable with, the words they needed to hear, and that skill had only grown since her time as an apprentice. It hardly made her unique, it was simply part of her job and many midwives had it. Anticipating problems was also an important skill in her field but that hardly meant she had the gift of foresight. As much as she tried to rationalize it, there was no reasonable explanation for her visions or the dream though.

Citali had been open and vulnerable with her, perhaps now was the time for Ahsoka to do the same. "Since you're still having doubts...I'd like to share a story of my own with you."

Ahsoka told Citali about traveling to Mortis with Obi-Wan and Anakin, encountering the beings who called themselves "The Ones". Of the test the Father had put Anakin through to discern if he was the Chosen One. The Son using his Dark Side powers on Ahsoka, causing her to turn on her master and grand-master. How the Daughter, a being who aligned herself with the Light Side, sacrificed herself to save the Father and transferred the last of her life essence to Ahsoka, reviving her. Of the Son's desire to leave the planet and wreak havoc on the universe, the Father and Anakin working together to kill him, preventing that from happening. Ahsoka had never spoken of the experience to anyone besides Anakin, Obi-Wan, or the Jedi Counsel but Citali needed to know that her feelings and visions were not a trick of her mind.

"Citali...Morai first appeared to me after I left Mortis. She serves the Light Side of the Force, just as the Daughter did." Ahsoka reached for Citali's hand again, this time holding it in both her hands. "You were drawn to each other. In the time Morai has been my companion, that's never happened with anyone. Between that, the visions, your dream...I don't know what purpose the Force wants you to fulfill but you most certainly have one. And whatever it is, it's important."

Citali wasn't sure what to say or how to feel. She looked at Morai who had made her way to sit on top of Ahsoka's hands still clasping Citali's. Night was falling fast and Citali swore she caught a glimpse of light emanating from Morai's eyes again.

"While you're here," Citali said as she scratched Morai's neck. "Only if you're comfortable with it of course...would you teach me about the Force? I know I'll never be able to do the things you can do but this connection you speak of...it could potentially make me a better midwife. If it could help me save even one more life...I owe it to my patients to try and strengthen it."

Ahsoka was a little taken aback, especially after sensing Citali's fear but perhaps this was why the Force had brought them together. "I would be happy to teach you. How about this...you teach me about healing people and I'll teach you about the Force."

Citali smiled widely. "Deal."

"You must know Citali," Ahsoka was quick to add. "Even Jedi Healers couldn't save every patient, and my own knowledge of healing and the Force is limited. Whatever I teach you will never replace your empathy, mind, or your hands. It will only enhance the skills and knowledge you already possess. As much as I wish it could, it won't save every one of your patients."

"I understand," Citali said, looking in the kitchen window at Marina. "But as I said...if it helps me save even one more life...I have a duty to at least try."

Morai took off and flew above the tree line before disappearing into the black sky as Ahsoka and Citali watched her fly away. "We can start tomorrow," Ahsoka said. "I believe you have some pressing work to attend to for the rest of the night."

Citali realized the time, she was supposed to relieve Tech from caring for Crosshair soon. She'd nearly forgotten with everything that had happened. She quickly got up from her chair and stirred the bubbling mixture again, now thick and gelatinous. "Tomorrow afternoon then?"

Tech was sitting at Citali's desk doing research while Crosshair slept. He and Omega had taken care of him during the day with some help from Hunter but even with the detailed schedule Citali had made, it had been a struggle. It wasn't caring for him that had been difficult but rather motivating him to do his therapies. Crosshair may have had trouble speaking but he didn't need words for Tech to know the man was angry with him and hurt. Crosshair was a bit more accepting of Omega's help but anytime Tech or Hunter were in the room, Crosshair glared at them. Tech didn't blame him in the slightest.

Like Omega and their brothers, Tech had spent a lot of time over the past few days thinking about the mistakes he'd made with Crosshair. How he'd been so quick to believe Crosshair was a willing participant in the Empire's atrocities. How he hadn't even scanned for Crosshair's chip before leaving him behind on Kamino. The scanner had been right on the ship. Had he taken just one minute to confirm the chip was truly gone, maybe Crosshair never would have ended up nearly dead on Wayland before fighting for his life again when his inhibitor chip was removed. Perhaps the possible complications Crosshair might now live with for the rest of his life could have been avoided. Tech had made a horrible misjudgment with his own brother, yet Anaasa was entrusting him with her life and that of her unborn child. Citali was trusting him to do right by her patient. Anaasa's operation date was approaching fast and he was beginning to wonder if their trust in him was misplaced. If he made such a foolish error with Crosshair, what was stopping him from making another during Anaasa's birth?

Citali entered the office with a box of small glass bottles of the medicine she'd been making, now cooled and ready to be given to Crosshair. She greeted Tech with a smile before looking at Crosshair, Hunter asleep in the cot beside him. Hunter had barely left his side since returning home and while Citali understood why, being in this room all day wasn't good for anyone. Citali went over to the desk and kneeled down beside Tech.

"How'd it go today?" she whispered.

"He's continuing to improve," Tech said softly. "However...he is less than receptive of our efforts to get him to exercise. He ate a little with Omega but wouldn't with me or Hunter. I believe he may have been pretending to sleep at times," Tech said, trying to remain objective but Citali could tell he was upset at himself. Tech handed Citali her datapad and she looked at Crosshair's chart. He hadn't done as much today as he should have.

Tech was bouncing his knee up and down, and Citali placed her hand on top of his sitting on the desk and Tech relaxed. "This is a difficult time for all of us," she said. "But especially for Crosshair. Being in a vulnerable position like this is frustrating and frightening. He's completely dependant on us and from the little I know about him, that probably doesn't feel good. Especially with...what happened between you all." There would be a time and place to discuss what occurred between the brothers, but now wasn't it. "These first few days are critical to him regaining what he's lost. Even if he doesn't want to do the therapies and exercises, it's imperative that he does. He might be annoyed or even angry, that's okay. He has every right to be but we need to do everything we can to get him to do them. I know you all have a lot to work through...let's start by just showing him that we care about him. And part of that is encouraging him to do things he might not want to do."

Tech nodded his head and put the book he'd been reading back on the shelf. Citali walked over to Hunter and roused him gently. "Hunter," Citali said quietly. "Why don't you go sleep in your room? You've barely left the office since getting back."

"I'm fine," Hunter said groggily as he sat up.

"Hunter, I know you are trying to make amends for what happened, but being in here all the time isn't good for you. You need a break." She put a hand to Hunter's cheek. "Let me and AZI handle tonight on our own. Crosshair and I have no history together. He..." Citali was trying to figure out how to word it delicately. "He might be more cooperative if it's just us. And once you get a decent night's sleep, you'll be well-rested so you can better help Tech and Omega tomorrow. I know you want to help him, but getting burnt out is not how you do it. And yes, I know how hypocritical I sound right now." I don't have a choice. "But caring for someone like Crosshair is a long-term commitment. You can't exhaust yourself in the first few days."

As much as Hunter still didn't want to leave him, he understood where Citali was coming from. Perhaps it would be better for everyone, including Crosshair, if he stepped away for a bit. "Alright," Hunter said as he stood and folded the cot up. He was still a little sore and struggled to pick it up so Tech came over and grabbed it for him.

"I'll let you know if anything happens of course," Citali said as she walked them to the door. "Get some rest."

Once Hunter and Tech had left, Citali let Crosshair rest just a little longer while she went over his chart again and the schedule for that night. When Citali tried to gently awaken him, Crosshair was startled and she saw the momentary fear in his eyes. She raised her hands to show she wasn't going to harm him. "You're safe Crosshair, I'm not going to hurt you."

He felt his body relax at the sound of her voice as her face came into focus. "I...did...not..." Crosshair trailed off and forgot what he meant to say.

"Think I was going to hurt you?" Citali responded, finishing his sentence. Crosshair nodded his head slightly. "Well, I still apologize. If there is a better way for me to wake you up, let me know. It's time to reposition you. We have to move you every few hours, that's very important."

Crosshair was curious. "Why?" he managed to say as he put his strong arm and leg down on the bed while Citali moved the left side of his body. Citali nearly grinned when she realized he was helping her without needing to be asked.

"There are a few reasons actually. One is to prevent blood clots in your legs. Another big one is bedsores," she said as she moved some pillows around. "They're very painful and can cause infection. And in someone with a compromised immune system, any infection can be serious. Preventing infection is much easier than treating it. Which reminds me..." Citali turned to AZI. "AZI, when you're done with that, would you mind sterilizing my new instruments? They're on the desk. The ovens in either kitchen should be available."

"Yes, Ms. Citali," AZI said as he quickly finished putting a note in her datapad, hovering over to the desk to pick up the new instruments Iirde had given her the other day as an early birthday gift. She kept forgetting her birthday was only two days away.

"Thank you, sweetheart," she said and Crosshair furrowed his right brow at the term of endearment. He couldn't recall ever hearing someone refer to a droid like that.

Citali couldn't help but giggle because she knew exactly what he was thinking and Crosshair found himself rather liking the sound of her laugh. Was she anyone else, he'd think she was laughing at him but he knew her laughter was directed at herself. "AZI isn't just a droid, he's become a good friend. We've learned a lot from each other," she said smiling affectionately at the medical droid as he left the room. "And I have a habit of calling my friends and family that. Well, only if they don't mind of course." Citali put the blanket back on Crosshair. He thought he heard a baby crying on the other side of the house but as suddenly as the crying started, it stopped.

Citali saw him react to Marina's cries. He was very alert for what he'd been through. "That's my niece, Marina. Her mother Melita and I are like sisters. She moved in with me after she gave birth. Marina was born in this room, in this bed actually. Don't worry, everything is waterproof and I thoroughly sanitize it before and after someone gives birth in it."

I'm a soldier, why would blood bother me? He thought to himself. He almost said the words aloud but decided against it. It would have taken a lot of effort to say and he couldn't deny that he wanted to be on good terms with this kind but strange woman. Besides Citali, Crosshair had only interacted with Hunter, Tech, and Omega since his rescue and their interactions had been awkward at best. They all looked at Crosshair with a mixture of remorse and pity, and he despised it. Citali on the other hand didn't do that. She always appeared genuinely happy to see him. Little did he know it was because she was.

Once Crosshair was propped upright and comfortable, she went to her desk and picked up a small glass bottle with a dark purple liquid inside. "I made you some new medicine. It'll help your brain heal from removing your chip." Citali popped the top off and held the bottle to Crosshair's lips. He smelled it and his face contorted. "Yeah...it tastes as sour as it smells, I tried it. It's not bad it's just...weird." Crosshair was skeptical but opened his mouth anyway. The taste was exactly as she described but the slimy texture was what Crosshair struggled with. He turned his head away from the bottle, a lopsided grimace on his face.

"Crosshair," she said in a gentle but authoritative tone. "You want to get better, right?" Crosshair nodded his head a bit. "Well, this medicine is going to help you get better. Between this and a few more bacta injections, within a day we should see some noticeable improvements. I know it's a little unpleasant, but I've some juice for you when you finish it to get the taste out of your mouth. Okay?"

Crosshair reluctantly groaned an affirmation and drank the entire bottle quickly, almost gagging. Citali put the straw from the glass of juice to his lips and he quickly drank the entire glass. "You know, it's a very good sign that you're able to swallow and drink as well as you can," she said cheerfully. "And you're able to move around more today which is fantastic. Are you starting to feel a little better?"

The genuine hopefulness on her face when she asked him was unexpected to Crosshair. Like she actually cared about him. "I...am," he said honestly.

She smiled at him again. "I'm very glad to hear that. Hopefully, by tomorrow evening you'll be feeling even better. But in the meantime, you and I have got some work to do to make that happen. You ready?" Her gentle enthusiasm was infectious and Crosshair couldn't stop the small grin that formed on his face as he nodded his head.

First, she had him do some exercises with his tongue, sticking it out and moving it side to side, which felt childish even after Citali explained the purpose of it and did it with him in solidarity. Then she had him try singing, which admittedly took a bit of convincing. She would sing a note and have him match its pitch. She then put some music on and instructed Crosshair to listen to it while they worked on moving his arms and legs.

Crosshair was exhausted by the time they'd finished everything and he quickly fell asleep, Citali deciding to take a little nap herself in the chair near him. When she woke up a short time later, Crosshair was already awake and was staring at her. He was embarrassed she'd caught him but he didn't want to wake her and there wasn't anything else to do while she slept. He mumbled an apology before Citali told him it was fine and went to check his vitals. AZI brought in some food, the droid and Citali assisting Crosshair with feeding himself. After he was done, he was almost dreading whatever it was Citali was going to have him do next as he was still very tired but instead of exercising, she sat in the bed next to him and put a holovid on her datapad. It was about the plants and animals of Naboo. Crosshair couldn't understand how mindless entertainment would aid in his recovery but Citali assured him it would before he even attempted to ask. That having a little fun while he was healing was as important as medicine and therapy. Her approach to healing was very different than he was accustomed to but he was starting to get used to it, even liking it. And the more he was around Citali, the more he found he enjoyed her company. Even when he grumbled about the things she was encouraging him to do, Citali always treated him with dignity and kindness. He wondered how his brothers had even met someone like her who seemed out of place on a planet well-known for gambling and crime, and he continued to speculate which of his brothers she might have ended up with.

She was witty and intelligent which in theory might make her and Tech compatible. She could also be silly and fun when it was appropriate, which Wrecker would find appealing. Her take-charge attitude was a trait Hunter would admire, and her obvious compassion for others was something Echo would certainly appreciate. If he was honest with himself though, Crosshair had a hard time picturing her with any of them. Hunter and Tech enjoyed the company of women but settling down wasn't something Crosshair could see either of them doing. And of the five of them, Wrecker and Echo were the only ones with no experience with that sort of thing at all. During downtime, Crosshair and his brothers would hit up bars and taverns on whatever planet they were stationed on at the time, but Wrecker and Echo never seemed interested in the beautiful strangers that made a move on them. Crosshair knew it was ridiculous to fixate on this woman's love life, even borderline disrespectful but he couldn't help it. Once the effects of his inhibitor chip had started to wear off, Crosshair spent many hours wondering what had become of Omega and his brothers after they left him on Kamino. Of all the scenarios he pictured, he never imagined any of them would have ended up being with someone like Citali. And as much as he was growing to care for her, she was also a reminder of how his brothers had moved on with their lives as if he'd never existed. It was simply easier to think about who Citali had fallen in love with, rather than everything else that had happened.

Dawn rose while Citali and Crosshair were doing more speech therapy exercises, practicing different consonant sounds when Omega and Tech entered the room. Citali got up from the side of the bed she'd been sitting on and walked over to them, giving them both a hug and Omega a kiss on the forehead. She gave them both a brief synopsis of what they had accomplished overnight before Citali went to Crosshair and held his left hand in both of hers.

"Alright my friend, my shift is over," she said looking into his eyes, thinking she saw a flicker of disappointment in them. "I'm going to get some sleep now but I'll be back this evening. You're in good hands with Tech and Omega till then. Make sure to do your exercises and therapies today, it's very important. And you'll be due for another dose of that medicine in a few hours, be sure to take it. I can tell it's already helping."

Citali said goodbye to them and Crosshair was surprised how much he didn't want her to leave. He thought about pretending to fall asleep like he'd done yesterday but knew Citali would be disappointed if she returned this evening to find he hadn't been cooperative. And once Citali mentioned it, he realized he had made some improvements, even overnight. His head wasn't hurting as much, he didn't feel as weak, and he could move some of the fingers on his left hand. The movements were barely more than a twitch but it was something. Perhaps her unorthodox methods were working. He begrudgingly finished his task before Omega and Tech helped him eat breakfast.

Citali went into her refresher to find a clean pair of pajamas and her robe sitting on the tub for her with a handwritten note on top.

Hope you were able to get a little rest last night. I left a snack for you on your nightstand. Make sure to eat before going to sleep. I love you.

-Echo

Citali got cleaned up and changed quickly before going to her room where Echo was still sleeping. He usually woke at the crack of dawn but his sleep schedule had been thrown off since the mission. Citali ate the snack he left for her before laying in bed beside him. He felt her in the bed with him and reached for her, pulling her towards him while she put her arm around his waist. She just stared at him for a while as she sometimes did when he was asleep, gazing lovingly at his handsome face. She wanted to tell him about what had happened in the garden with Morai and what Ahsoka had told her, but she didn't have the heart to wake him when he was sleeping so peacefully. The nightmares of his time in captivity had never gone away completely but since returning home, he had them every time he closed his eyes.

For now, she was content just holding him while he held her, allowing herself just a few moments of reprieve to think of nothing but the man she'd fallen so deeply in love with.

Taglist: @justasigh37 @darkangel4121 @arcee-1995 @gjrain20-starwars

#tw: childbirth #tw: death mention #tw: blood mention #the bad batch #bad batch fanfiction #bad batch fanfic #call the twi'lek midwife

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write4tomorrow · 4 years ago

Text

Weakness

Word Count: 3366

Pairing: Sith!Obi-Wan Kenobi x Jedi!Reader

Summary: Master Kenobi fell from the Jedi order many years ago, but that doesn’t mean he hasn’t kept close tabs on the jedi order since. As Darth Dominus, he has recently discovered that he is part of a Force Dyad… with a jedi. How will he bring her to his side?

Genre: Angst / Fluff

A/N: This is part two to this one shot I wrote, but can be read as just a one shot. Also, in this universe, Count Dooku has two apprentices.

The only light in the dark conference room came from the blue hologram in Darth Dominus’ palm. He watched as the Jedi knight moved faster than he had seen any Jedi ever move. With two lightsabers, the wielder must be incredibly in tune with their surroundings and the force to fight without also hurting themselves. They had to be really good. The Jedi in Dominus' palm wasn’t just good, she was a master.

Dominus scowled at his own thoughts. This girl was going to stop him from taking the republic for himself. He had seen it time and time again in his dreams and his meditations and the occasional vision. You were going to be his downfall. Your face plagued him like the lingering flavor of honey after a burning cup of coruscanti tea. So why couldn’t he stop staring at the hologram? Why couldn’t he bring himself to confront this inevitable downfall?

Because it wasn’t inevitable. For every vision he saw of you turning against him, he saw another dream of you in beautiful crimson robes with a pair of red sabers to match. For every vision he saw of you standing against him, he saw another of you standing by his side. This was his curse, to be half of a dyad.

He had been able to keep it well hidden. No one knew except you and him but that didn’t mean he liked it. How had he wound up the other half of a Jedi? His one weakness was you and he hated both you and himself for it. So why couldn’t he stop gazing at you on the hologram? Why couldn’t he stop himself from reaching out to you through the force? And why didn’t you ever respond?

“Oh, Kenobi. You really can’t stop yourself, can you?” Darth Maul had crept into the room without Dominus noticing. He knew that using his jedi name would rattle him but Maul was always trying to rattle him. If only Dominus had been more aware of his own surroundings. He cursed Maul’s unnaturally quiet robotic legs and tried to deactivate the hologram. However, Maul used the force to pull the moving image of you out of Dominus’ grip.

“She’s good,” Maul teased, “do you think she moves those hips like that when-”

In a flash Dominus had ignited his lightsaber and sliced the hologram peice in half, narrowly missing Maul’s hand. Unfazed, Darth Maul raised an eyebrow at the sudden outburst.

“You’re distracted, and Tyrannus can tell.” At Maul’s words, Dominus’ face paled in the dark room. His saber was still drawn and he thought about taking his anger out on Maul. Instead, he tucked his saber back into his dark robe and ran a hand over his beard to calm himself.

“I will speak with Tyrannus. Don’t worry about her,” Dominus tried to push past Maul to leave the room, but Maul stepped in his way.

“Oh he knows about y/n,” Maul smiled as he said your name, “in fact, I came to tell you that he’s on his way to deal with her now.” Maul laughed as Dominus’s face lost all remaining color and the former Jedi left the room in a sprint.

*******************************

Reconnaissance missions weren’t your specialty, but you always enjoyed stepping into an undercover role. You were attending a separatist gala as a senator’s liaison. The actual senator was still on his ship, a few miles above the planet’s atmosphere, dealing with a pesky cusom’s agent by the name of Anakin Skywalker. Ahsoka Tano had accompanied you to the gala in the hopes that two listening ears were better than just one.

You hadn’t seen her in a few hours though and were beginning to worry. With your best smile, you excused yourself from the conversation with one of the banking clan members.

“Ahsoka,” you hissed into your coms, “Where are you?” After a moment of static, you heard Anakin’s voice answer.

“Her com may have died,” Anakin sighed, “Besides, the lovely senator has decided to just go home so I don’t need to be up here anymore. I am going to come down to you guys and see if I can find her.”

“Thanks, Anakin,” you whispered, “let me know if you find anything.” You felt a little better knowing that Anakin was on his way to you. You hadn’t realized it, but something was making you tense. Something felt wrong.

You knew better than to ignore your intuition. If something felt wrong, something probably was wrong. You felt the weight of your sabers in the small purse around your shoulder. Protectively you used one hand to cover your purse and the other to grab your black skirt. Lifting your dress up just a little, you tried to quickly leave the room. Perhaps some air would help clear your head and you would be able to think of a plan.

“There you are.” You stopped short as a body stepped into your way. With a quick glance up, you recognized the man. You had never met before, but Anakin and Ahsoka had told you many stories about Count Dooku. This was the man that talked Obi-Wan Kenobi into joining the separatists and the Sith. If Count Dooku was here, was Obi-Wan close as well?

“I’m sorry, sir,” you feigned politeness, “I don’t think I know-”

“Don’t play dumb, girl,” Dooku countered, “besides, if you don’t know me, perhaps you know her?” Dooku pulled out a small screen from his pocket and showed an image of Ahsoka. Your heart sank. Ahsoka was bound by some of the heaviest handcuffs you’d ever seen. Two separatists droids were keeping her on her knees.

“Take my arm and smile,” Dooku grinned as he spoke, “it’s an honor to finally meet you, y/n.” Without seeing another good option, you allowed yourself to be led out of the room. You hoped that Anakin would get here soon.

Dooku didn’t speak while he led you away. As you walked, he wordlessly took the small bag from around your shoulders and tucked your lightsabers into his own jacket pocket. You tried to think of a good way out of your current situation, but the walk was over before you could think of anything.

After a few short turns down increasingly reclusive hallways, Dooku pulled you into a storage room near one of the building’s exits. Upon seeing Ahsoka, you tried to move toward her, but Dooku pulled you back.

“Tell us what you want, Dooku,” you tried to keep your voice calm, “so we can all be on our way.”

“There is nothing you can do that I want,” Dooku said with a shrug. His eyes watched you for a reaction and you could tell he was expecting you to do something.

“Everybody wants something,” you returned, “and you’re talking to the best negotiator in the Jedi Order.” You did your best to match Dooku’s calm demeanor. He only smiled back at you.

“I’ve heard of your reputation as both negotiator and battle strategist,” Dooku glanced at Ahsoka, “but you’re going to have to do more than talk your way out of this one, dear Jedi.”

“Give me my sabers, dear captor,” you offered, “and we can exchange more than words.” Dooku laughed and drew himself up to his fullest height.

“Clever girl with a silver tongue, no wonder he likes you.” At Dooku’s words, you froze. Was he talking about… no. You pushed the thought of Obi-Wan Kenobi from your mind. That man - that Sith - took up too much of your time already. Sometimes it felt like you couldn’t get him out of your head, no matter how hard you tried. Even when you slept or mediated, you saw visions of him.

Even now, there was a nagging pull in your mind that usually meant he was trying to reach you. You closed your eyes, trying to push the feeling away.

“My ship will be here soon,” Dooku continued, “and you will board it with me or Ahsoka will die in this room.” You looked down at Anakin’s apprentice and could feel the fear well up inside of her. There was defiance too and you smiled as Ahsoka shook her head. She was brave and you adored her for it.

Please, please listen to me, You heard the familiar voice in your mind. It was Obi-Wan Kenobi and, just like you had time and time again, you tried to ignore him. Still, you felt him push harder than he ever had before.

Dooku is coming for you, y/n, Obi-Wan warned.

Dooku has me. You answered without keeping the mirth from your voice. There was a pause from Obi-Wan. Perhaps it was his shock that you had answered him at all. After all, you had done your best to stay radio silent over the past several months. But now you were straining to keep his presence at bay and you could feel both Ahsoka and Dooku looking at you. You tried to fake a smile but you felt Obi-Wan pushing his way into your mind.

I’m almost there, he said, be ready. He didn’t need to say more. You could feel him becoming stronger, closer. And you knew he meant to do something brash.

“When do we leave?” You asked Dooku.

“Y/n,” Ahsoka pleaded, “don’t do this.” Dooku nodded at the droid who took that as a signal to bring the end of a blaster down on Ahsoka’s head hard enough to make her cry out. You tried to push towards the padowan again, but Dooku pulled out his red saber and leveled it at your chest.

“We leave now,” Dooku glared at you as you thought about retaliating. Quietly, you made your way out of the room, closely followed by the Sith Lord. His saber was no longer ignited but he kept it in his hand as an idol threat. You gave Ahsoka one last look before he closed the door on her and the two droids.

“Follow me,” Dooku gestured toward the end of the hallway but you froze in your tracks. Standing in gorgeously dark robes at the end of the hall was none other than Obi-Wan Kenobi. You felt an overwhelming wave of something hopeful fill your chest. You wanted to run away from the Sith and you wanted to sprint toward him.

Dooku seemed just as surprised as you felt. But in his surprise, you realized that this was your opportunity to act. Using the force, you pushed Dooku back against the wall and felt your lightsabers in his blazer pocket. But you also felt Ahsoka’s. You couldn’t grab all four sabers and you didn’t have time to think about it.

Dooku pushed you away from himself but you were faster than him. You dashed back to the room that Ahsoka was in. You threw open the door and used her saber to cut the restrains. You left her to free herself and hurried back to deal with the two Sith lords in the hallway.

To your horror, Obi-Wan was waiting for you. He angrily launched a flurry of strikes towards you. Is he here to save you or kill you? You didn’t have a chance to ask him. Without a weapon, you were playing defense and he was merciless in his attack.

Run, Obi-Wan’s voice rang in your head, you were supposed to run. Obi-Wan pushed you farther away from Dooku with his attacks. You understood then that Obi-Wan was trying to help you. Over Obi-Wan’s shoulder, you saw that Ahsoka had escaped the droids and was running towards Dooku. Even if you wanted to run, you couldn’t leave Ahsoka. Not to mention, Dooku still had your sabers. You tried to get around Obi-Wan. You needed to find some way to help Ahsoka.

Obi-Wan pushed you around a corner, out of sight from Dooku and Ahsoka. You suddenly realized that he was steering you someplace.

“What are you doing?” You halted, hoping that the Sith lord before you wouldn’t strike you down. Just as you hoped, Obi-Wan turned his lightsaber off. But not even a breath later, he shoved you against the wall. Not with the force. No, with his bare hands, Obi-Wan held you in place against the wall. He spoke in shallow breaths that were somewhere between fury and desperation.

“Dooku will kill you,” He was so close his breath was mixing with your own. “If you don’t get out of here, he’ll… I’ll be forced to…”

“Why don’t you let me go, and I’ll just kill you both instead?” You tried to break Obi-Wan’s grip on you but he held strong.

“Stop joking around.” Obi pleaded.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t wear the right dress for surrendering.” You offered with an eye roll. Obi-Wan looked at your dress then and you saw the corners of his mouth turn up in the smallest smile.

“Darling, that dress fits you perfectly. Even if it didn’t, I’d find a million new dresses for you if you just come with me.” Obi-Wan’s eyes took a second to linger before looking back into your own.

“Obi-Wan-” you began, but he cut you off.

“Come with me, willingly. Come with me and I can tell Dooku that I will train you. You and I will rule the galaxy.” Obi-Wan’s voice was softer now, pleading.

“I can’t,” You began, but you wouldn’t let him know how much you wanted to, “I would rather be tortured as your Jedi captive than live as your pet.”

“There’s no way out of this! You come with us or- you have to come with me or I will have to kill you,” Obi-Wan’s voice cracked. You looked at his face and you could feel the turmoil in him.

“You don’t have to kill me-”

“I won’t let him hurt you!” Obi-Wan’s voice was strained and his words seemed to come out against his will, “I’ll kill you before I let him have you, y/n.”

“You don’t have to kill me, Obi-Wan.” your voice was just a whisper and something in Obi-Wan’s expression softened. This man in front of you seemed so desperate and you couldn’t tell why. Before he could say anything else, you heard Ahsoka cry out from the other hallway. You need to get to the padowan.

Obi-Wan seemed to sense your apprehension. He registered Ahsoka for the first time and released you. He cursed under his breath and turned his attention away from you for the briefest moment. He ran back into the alley with Dooku and Ahsoka with you close on his heels. You watched as he used the force to pick up the padawan and hurled her towards the hallway’s opposite exit. You took that as an opportunity to attack Obi-Wan. You didn’t want to harm him, but you needed to get out of here. You used the force to push Obi-Wan away from you in an attempt to clear an escape route. He fell to the side but before you could run, you felt an overwhelming pressure around your throat.

It was Dooku. Now that Ahsoka wasn’t here to distract him, he had turned his attention towards you and Obi-Wan. He tightened his invisible grip around your throat enough to make you gasp for air but not enough to fully suffocate you. You couldn’t help but admire how terribly effective it was.

“Darth Dominus,” Dooku strolled toward the pair of you, “I am surprised to see you here.” Obi-Wan rose to his feet and straightened his robes. He ran a hand through his golden hair.

“I heard you were going after Master y/n,” Obi-Wan said, “I wanted to help.” Obi-Wan looked over at you as you struggled to take in breath. His eyes were the best shade of gold and there was a warmth behind them that took your breath away more effectively than Dooku could imagine.

“Be mindful of your thoughts, Dominus,” Dooku chided. He turned to you and slowly pulled you off your feet. The pressure around your throat constricted too much. You saw spots in the air and blackness began to close in on your vision.

As he dropped you, the sound of Dooku laughing filled the hallway. Obi-Wan had dropped to a knee in front of his master. He must have said something to Dooku while you were fighting for breath.

“So it seems, my apprentice, you are half of a dyad.” Dooku gave Obi-Wan a dark smile, “I’ve suspected it for some time now. I hear you calling to her in the dark nights when you should be sleeping.” You and Obi-Wan exchanged looks, but it was too late. The secret was out.

“The two of you together will be the most powerful weapons in the whole galaxy,” Dooku kelt in front of you and grabbed your jaw. Obi-Wan quickly stood from his keeling position.

“Relax, my apprentice. I’ll have you both alive and whole. Together we will help Darth Sideous-” Dooku was cut off by a cry from the hallway. Obi-Wan, Dooku and you turned to see Anakin and Ahsoka standing at the other end of the hallway. You smiled from ear to ear and knew that this was your chance. Just as you had done earlier for Ahsoka’s sabers, you reached into Dooku’s jacket pocket and retrieved your lightsabers. You ignited both and began an attack on Dooku.

Anakin and Ahsoka rushed to your side. But Anakin froze as he locked eyes with Obi-Wan. The two men looked at one another. Master and apprentice was a bond that stayed with someone for life and you could see pain written on both of their faces.

Even though Anakin was distracted, you were able to push Dooku far enough against a wall to make a run towards the exit. Ahsoka ran after you and Anakin began to follow after a silent nod at his old master.

“Darth Dominus,” Dooku said loud enough for you to hear, “do you think she cares for you the same way you care for her?” Your blood turned to ice as you doubled back to see Dooku stand and turn on his apprentice.

Before you could do anything, Dooku used force lightning on Obi-Wan. His scream filled the hall ways and before you knew what you were doing, you were running back to help him. You didn’t make it far though. Both Ahsoka and Anakin grabbed you and dragged you back. They were probably talking to you but you couldn’t hear them. The only sound you could hear was Obi-Wan’s screams.

A weak voice pushed its way into your mind. Run was all it said. You knew Obi-Wan was telling you to go. You knew that Dooku was setting a trap, but you couldn’t just leave him. You hated yourself for it, but you couldn’t just leave.

It didn’t matter. Anakin and Ahsoka dragged you away before you could do anything else.

*******************************

“What were you thinking,” Ahsoka was astonished, “going back to help a sith lord?” You were aboard a small ship heading back to the Jedi temple. Anakin and Ahsoka had done a full medical test on you just to make sure you were okay before they began their own version of an interrogation. You barely had a chance to speak over the two.

“You almost- I mean, I miss Obi-Wan, but the man I knew is dead,” Anakin seemed almost angry, “And what did Count Dooku mean, ‘does she care for you’?”

“Do you know what a dyad in the force is?” you finally asked. Anakin immediately went quiet and Ahsoka gasped. Ah, so they did know.

“You’re not- no, no way,” Ahsoka said in a hushed voice. She didn’t believe it and to be honest, you didn’t want to believe it either. All you could do was nod. You had been able to keep it well hidden. No one knew except you and him but that didn’t mean you liked it. How had you wound up the other half of a Sith? His one weakness was you and yours was him. You could feel how much you hated him and yourself for it. So why couldn’t you stop thinking about him and wondering if he was okay? Why couldn’t he stop himself from reaching out to you through the force? And why couldn’t you ever bring yourself to respond?

“I need to tell the Council when we get back,” was all you said. Anakin and Ahsoka stayed silent, the weight of this news sitting heavily on their shoulders.

The faintest voice filled your mind then. You really did look good in that dress. For our next date, try blue.

Before you could stop yourself, you smiled. He was alive and he was okay. Well, okay enough to be snarky. And that was enough for you. You looked up and saw Anakin watching you.

“I’m so sorry, y/n,” was all Anakin could say.

A/N: Hi! I really like Sith Obi-Wan. I’m tagging people who asked to be tagged and who also asked if there would be a follow up to my last fic. Sorry I didn’t answer you, but I figured a part two was better than an answer. Anyway, thank you for reading! @emmamikaelson95 @fandom-lover-4 @mellowstatesmanhandsempath @good-night-starlight

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captainrexisboo · 4 years ago

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Comfort pt5: Sarad

Link to Previous - this chapter takes off right at the end of the previous part, so!

Here It Is. Part Five. I Love My Boo So Much. Also- my first fully completed fic?? Ever??! Holy crap!!!! Dumb Luck stares at me as it sharpens a knife in the corner

No warnings apply, Rex x Reader, reader is a lady. Questions and comments are always welcome! Let me know if y’all want an epilogue!!

EDIT!!! Link to Epilogue!!!

Tagging: @pro-fangirls-unsocial-life @000ayfh @pinkiemme @midnightredemption @simping-for-fives @danger-xylophones @iscream4clones @jyvorakal @leias-left-hair-bun @vesperstalksclones @mackstrut @yamaktaria @juitoverride @callme-eds @greenygreenland All of you have been so wonderful, I love reading your comments/tags, and seeing your names/icons pop up in my notifs always make me smile!!! You’re all amazing!!! Love y’all!!!

You sat at your desk, spinning a stylus in between your fingers and back straight, chewing on a swollen, worried bottom lip. Your eyes were rimmed red and puffy, but dry- you had already done all your crying, and were now just sitting alone, stewing in your own emotion. You couldn’t even look at Rex directly as he slowly steps into the room, just thinking to yourself about what happened, replaying the unexpected uneventfulness in your mind, trying to find out why it hurt you so. You felt so hypocritical, throwing a fit about Aurin’s lack of attention when you explicitly asked him to leave you alone. You were such a fool, anyway you looked at it.

Your gaze went low as Rex stepped closer, putting your cup directly in front of you. You gave him a silent nod in thanks, and he stood for a minute, holding his own cup as he shifted on his feet. His voice came out nearly strained, a thin whisper, “Should I… Do you need me to come back later, or-”

“Please stay.”

Your words were croaked, and you winced at the broken sound, but you didn’t want him to leave. You didn’t realize how much you didn’t actually want to be alone until Rex had walked in. He sat across from you, armor clacking together as he got comfortable (or as comfortable as he could in full gear) and you could feel his calculating gaze tracing your face and form. You let out a cough (it was supposed to be a laugh) knowing exactly what he was searching for. “He didn’t hurt me, Captain. Never did, never will.”

You felt a corner of your lips twitch up slightly as Rex let out a sigh of relief, but noticed how he still stayed tense. “Y/N, what’s the matter? What happened?”

What happened?

“What happened indeed,” you let out a wry exhale, “In all seriousness, nothing happened” -you held up a hand as Rex opened his mouth to protest, stopping him before he made a sound- “and that’s just the problem.”

Rex tilted his head, cocking his eyebrow, “I, uh. I don’t think I follow.”

You finally looked up at him with a dead stare, and he stiffened again. You sighed low, your eyelids feeling heavy as your heart sank deeper into your stomach. You let your gaze fall again, before clearing your throat, “I’m sorry, Rex. I… I don’t know what I’m doing. I ask him to leave me alone, and when he does- literally, he barely even spared a glance at me today- I fall completely apart. I don’t know if this is like just a release of energy because I was hyping myself up beforehand and planning all the ways I’d deflect his conversation, or if it’s shock because I wasn’t expecting to be ignored, or if I’m regretting-”

“Hey, slow down, wait a second,” Rex shushed you, voice a little more present as he leaned forward, “Look at me.”

You hesitated, pulling your lip back between your teeth, but did as you were told. You felt meek, glancing up at him through your lashes as he held your stare with his deep honeyed eyes. He gestured towards your caf, and you slowly lifted a hand to wrap around the cup, feeling your shoulders release a little as the warmth of the cup seeped into your palm and fingers. When did they get so cold?

“Take a breath,” Rex demonstrated for you, as you followed his command to the letter, “Now take a drink. Relax.”

You brought the drink up to your lips, letting the sweetened substance flow past your lips and glide easy down your throat. He had this uncanny ability to doctor your caf just right, it never ceased to make your eyes flutter shut, like the drink was a signal that you could begin to let go of any stress that plagued your mind. The same warmth that spread through your hand pulsed through your chest, before you let out a shuddering breath, placing the cup back on the desk. You opened your eyes, Rex giving you a soft smile at your heavy sigh, ”Better?” You nodded to him. “Good. Now, ‘nothing’ happened?”

“Yeah,” you deflated, not defeatedly in self-pity as you were before, but an expel of the tension that had been eating away at you for the better half of the day, “I thought this was what I wanted, and I… I think that’s it’s still what I want, but when he actually put it into practice I just…”

You scoffed at yourself, glancing off to the side to stare at the pile of flimsi Yularen needed to sign off on, “You know how you get yourself excited for something that’s about to happen, something you want to happen, and the moment it happens it’s different than how you’d expect it to be?”

Rex nodded, heart skipping as he thought about Ahsoka’s speculation. What would happen if he told you his true feelings now? Would you laugh at him, thinking he’s playing a cruel joke on you? Would you pout at him, and apologize for not feeling the same way? Would you stare at him with an icy glare and tell him how awful he is for telling you at the worst possible timing? Would you smile at him so sweetly, and get up from your chair to walk around and whisper an admission of your own feelings as well, lips brushing against his temple like that one day he can’t stop replaying in his head? He’s unsure which option scares him the most.

“Aurin ignored me throughout the entire inspection today, even as we stood alone with each other. He didn’t say a word, didn’t look in my direction. He simply stood next to me,” you recounted, gaze going unfocused again, “He did exactly as I asked. For whatever reason, it hurt me. It hurt so much-”

You cut yourself off as your voice cracked, feeling the lump form in your throat again. You reach for your caf, taking another soothing sip, letting the hot liquid push past the emotion rising in your throat. Breathing steady, you looked back into your lap, sitting your caf back on your desk before shrinking into a whisper, “And I can’t figure out why.”

Rex sat still, ankle crossed over his knee. He took a long sip from his own cup, soaking in the information. It was a heavy minute before he cleared his throat, “Do you… do you maybe want to talk to him?” Rex felt himself swallow thickly. “Do you want to be with him again?”

“No.”

You reeled back, wincing at yourself, surprised at how quickly you responded. Rex looked at you intently, but with merciful patience, only the incline of his head urging you to continue. You gazed back into Rex’s eyes, feeling something in your stomach stir from their sincerity. If nothing else, Rex was earnest and kind at his core. You had unwavering confidence in your friendship, and you were reminded of that everytime you looked into his eyes. You could tell him anything- he could pull the truth out of you better than you could push it through by yourself. Alone, you had to hunt for it, search the darkest corners of your mind, and almost always came back into the light empty handed and frustrated. You’d exhausted yourself so easily doing just that today, but when you locked onto Rex’s gaze, he could easily lead you to your truth. He coaxed it out of you with gentle whispers and soft touches, with eyes that practically glowed with an emotion you thought you knew but couldn’t quite place. You swallowed a breath, sitting up straight, and talking directly to Rex, letting your instinct take over as you answered silent questions.

What do you want?

“I want to continue to keep my distance from him.”

Why?

“It was...shocking. To not have any interaction with him. But its what I need, to grow into my own person. It’ll be better this way.”

So how do you explain your reaction?

“I guess I… I’m afraid.”

You stopped yourself from venturing further down that rabbit hole, finally breaking away from Rex’s stare. You took a deep breath, in through your nose and out through your mouth, the emotional strain from today taking its toll on you. You shut your eyes tight, dropping your chin to your chest, trying to stop the headache from coming on, not even looking up as you heard the weighty steps of Rex’s boots as he walked around your desk.

Rex had gotten up from his seat as soon as your lashes hit the tops of your cheeks. He allowed his typically quiet footfalls to echo in the room as he opted for a slow walk to come closer to you, setting his half-finished caf on the edge of your desk. He never seemed to be able to shake his nerves whenever he made a move to touch you, always moving as if time was slowed down around the two of you, in your own little pocket of reality. His hand moved cautiously, making sure you had time to feel his presence, time to move away if you needed to. Rex’s fingers brushed at your shoulder, curling over the muscle as his thumb traced your collarbone, hidden under your uniform jacket. He put pressure there, a slight squeeze, causing you to hum lightly at the contact. Rex continued his motions at your approval, sinking down to one knee to see if he could catch your eyes, only to find them closed. He smoothed his gloved hand over the gray material, following the slope of your shoulder in a fluid motion, keeping his voice low despite being the only two people in the room, “What are you afraid of, cyar’ika?”

The endearment was out of his mouth before he could stop himself, but if you knew what the term meant you didn’t mention it. He left it alone, letting the moment settle.

You shivered slightly at his gravelly tone, taking note of the new word you’d have to ask about later. He said it so softly in a single exhale, that at least you knew it wasn’t supposed to be an insult. You opened an eye, finding his stare on you, and opening the other one as you leaned forward, placing your forehead against his. The position was awkward, your back was hunched and you could already feel your neck getting stiff, but the keldabe kiss made you feel at ease, lifting a hand to wrap around the back of Rex’s head, feeling the prick of his buzz on your palm, the pads of your fingers rubbing lightly over his scalp. You felt a smile twitch up as he gave a relieving sigh of his own, closing his eyes as he melted at your petting.

“I’m afraid of changing,” the admission fell out of you as a wave of calm washed over the two of you, startling yourself, but the grip you and Rex held on each other kept you grounded enough to move forward, “Aurin and I… we were inseparable for so long. I want to know who I am without him, figure out what it means to be me. But I can’t help but think- this is so silly- what if I spend too much time on that? What if I finally complete my journey, but can’t find anyone to love that version of me?”

Your hand moved down to grip at the back of Rex’s neck, his eyes opening as your gaze went downcast, continuing after a breath, “Aurin and I had a love… I outgrew it. What if by the time I finish growing, no one has room to love me like that anymore?”

“I will.”

Your eyes shot back up at the two simple words, growing wide at the sudden revelation. You froze after your eyes locked, swallowing down a breath as you waited for him to continue, still keeping your foreheads pressed together. Rex moved his hand over your shoulder, rubbing up and down your arm in a calming pace, though you’re unsure if it was to soothe your nerves or his own. The air you both were suddenly all-too-aware of sharing thickened as the silence stretched, Rex’s eyes searching your own as he briefly wetted his lips in anticipation of your reaction.

“Y/N, I need you to know, you’ll never outgrow those who already care for you. Aurin kept you locked in a box, and it was a warm, safe box. But you did a brave thing. You took a step out of that box, and as soon as you did you blossomed. Sarad, flower, you’ll always be growing, that’s a part of life,” he cleared his throat, intent on making his devotion ring clear, both of his hands moving to wrap around your own, the one still in your lap, “You’re healing, finding your roots, and already you’ve changed so much, in the brightest of ways. And I… I really, really care for you. I’ll always be here for you, by your side, ready to welcome you into my heart with open arms. If you decide I’m not for you, that’s fine, just please take this to heart- I’ll always make room to love you.”

He held his breath, waiting for your response, not daring to break your hold. Your fingers had stopped their light massaging on his head, but you kept him pulled to you. He gripped your hand between his own, running his thumbs over your knuckles. He didn’t want to let go- if you ended up hating him for this outburst, he wanted to be in your touch as long as possible until then.

You had no response. You were silent and intensely looking right through him, to say you were shocked was an understatement, but you held no doubt that Rex had spoken only the truth to you. The past few months started to replay through your mind, all his little quirks and notions that you thought were just him in culture shock to nat-born socializing became clear- and you could punch yourself for not realizing it sooner. He loves you...seems like he always had. The longer the moment stretched, the more nervous the Captain’s gaze fell, and you just barely choked out a whisper, “Rex…”

Your mouth hung open, stuck in how to continue, letting a breathless, but short giggle come through you as he visibly perked up to your voice. You blinked at him, trying to clear your mind, “I...I-I’m sorry, I need some time to think, still.”

“That’s fine,” Rex nodded, almost forgetting your foreheads were still pushed together as his words came out in a rush, “take as much time as you need. I’m not telling you this as a way to ask you out o-or anything, I just. I just don’t want you to feel unloved. I’m here for you, no matter if you match my feelings or…”

He trailed off, his eyes being pulled to the floor as the other option crossed both of your minds. He didn’t need to say it. You felt your heart ache for him, here he was laying his soul out to you, and all you could do was request that he gives you time.

But this its time that he’s willing to give.

“I’ve waited for you for so long already,” his baritone rumbled from his chest, as he slowly brought his gaze back up to you. You felt your cheeks heat under the warmth of the amber hearth that was his eyes, “I’ll gladly wait two lifetimes more.”

Something in you broke. It snapped, and the force of it pushed you forward, colliding with the Captain’s lips. You both made brief sounds, a muffled chirp against a surprised throaty grunt, equal parts terrified and triumphant. He tasted like caf, with a bite of citrus, like he’d been eating an orange, and the thought for whatever reason made you smile against him as your eyes slid shut.

Rex’s eyes blew wide open, freezing in place at your movement. Holding his breath as you stayed on his lips, heart racing like never before, even on the battlefield. This was different, and delightful, and how do you kiss someone properly, is there a manual for it, should he stay still or-

Just as quickly as you brushed against him, you had left, and he had to restrain himself to keep from following you back. You looked at him, and- oh. He knows those eyes.

“I still need time,” you breathed out, moving off of his forehead but fingers resuming their petting over his scalp, “but maybe I’ll run the course quicker knowing you’re at the finish line.”

Rex had dreamed of your eyes looking at him like that, and he was sure his gaze matched. Like you had hung the stars in the sky for the ships to fly through, like he had painted the universe on a velvet canvas- like he loved you. Like you loved him. Your moony gazes were locked on each other before he rasped out, only just remembering to breathe in the quiet moment, “I don’t want to push my luck, but… could you maybe, possibly, kiss me? Again? Please, I feel like I did it wrong.”

He melted in the ring of your laughter, a smile finally breaking through his face at the sound, squeezing the hand he still held. You looked at him with unchecked fondness, and shook your head, “You did fine.” A coquettish gleam came through your eyes, as you gently pulled at the back of his head. He followed your prompting, leaning up eagerly to close the space between you, eyes glancing to your lips as you smiled, “Although, a little practice never hurt anybody.”

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renegadeontherunn · 3 years ago

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Me again. I'd actually really like to hear your thoughts about fine on the outside by Priscilla Ahn besides the obvious bc well this song is just very fitting— did you have any specific thoughts? And cassiopeia by anju? Mostly coz I didn't know that song before :')

!!!! of course!!!! I would love to, thank you so much for the ask!!!!! :'))))

okay, so fine on the outside first!

I mostly put this song on there bc of this section:

so I just sit in my room after hours with the moon / and think of who knows my name / would you cry if I died / would you remember my face?

just because like. after ahsoka left the order I can just imagine how sad and heartbroken and just homesick she felt and it's so sad!!! and we don't really get to see that in the show, and I feel like this line is specific to obi-wan and ahsoka because I think it's obvious that she knows that anakin still supports her and loves her and he stood by her the whole time. but with obi-wan, at least to her, it doesn't seem like that so much. and having to leave everything behind with seemingly no word or support from obi-wan, who was very much a partial master to her too??? idk I just feel like ahsoka would be questioning everything after she leaves and especially obi-wan's part in it.

but as for the rest of the song, I like to think that while, yes, anakin and ahsoka are extremely similar, she's also similar to obi-wan in some aspects and I feel like this song represents some of those similarities pretty well, specifically in their similarities growing up! like they both had challenging times as initiates and their starts to being a padawan, and idk I just like to think that their childhoods were similar. I'm not super familiar with obi-wan's history in canon, but I feel like both he and ahsoka were fiery little upstarts that maybe didn't have "that many friends growing up" and I definitely feel like they both had to learn to mask their inner turmoil, especially in regards to anakin. and also bc they've been through a lot!!! and they both had to just be "fine on the outside" bc they had jobs to do and they wanted to support anakin, especially towards the end and after where he fell apart, but they had to continue on and be "fine on the outside." I also think it's super interesting to think about them talking to vader in the section I mentioned above (so I just sit in my room . . .) and to think about how much of anakin is still in there--think of who knows my name (vader in rebels with the "Ahsoka." YIKES) / would you cry if I died / would you remember my face? so yeah! that's that for this one :')

and now for cassiopeia by anju!

this one, like fine on the outside, is sort of about the vibes of the song that make me think of obi and soka, but there are some specific lines.

i'm just a little confused / what to think of us

this is so ahsoka post wrong jedi. just like confused and betrayed and angry, but still sad to leave and missing him and just! especially coupled with the lines before that saying "for once in my life i don't know how to feel" as in, for once she doesn't know how to feel about them bc she never imagined that this would happen, it's always "we'll be fine as long as we stay together" and "our padawan" so it's just really startling & confusing to suddenly have this happen and not know what to think.

am I dreaming / is it even you / cassiopeia?

so for this, I'm thinking their reunion again. the disbelief and surprise and slight doubt of is that really you, are you really alive, am I dreaming? would 100% be them if they saw each other again

constellate our fears with cinnamon sticks / let's connect the stars / help me hold the heavy parts of a heart / feel me from afar

I also just really like all the space & star references in this song, which gives me very much obi and soka vibes and also bc star wars lol but anyway! with this line, I feel like it shows how obi-wan sort of helped ahsoka as a padawan in a war, and anakin did too obviously, just the "help me hold the heavy parts of a heart" really speaks to obi and soka I think :')

many moons of waiting on a steady sun / now I freeze in fear / merge out fingernail horizons / swear you'll catch my tears / maybe sometime you can teach me / how to hold on to your hand / maybe next time when I'm bleeding / I can call across the sand

this!!!!! this part gets me again with reunion thoughts!!!!! obi-wan waiting, even knowing that it'll never happen, just the slightest bit of hope that he'll see her again, the "now I freeze in fear" I can literally see it in my head that's THEM REUNITING AHHHHHHH. and just like! the softness of this bit and like relieved, incredulous crying and just!!! this is them reuniting!!!! and I feel like the second part they could both be saying to each other, "maybe sometime you can teach me . . ." and "maybe next time when I'm bleeding . . ." maybe they don't have to be alone anymore!!!! and! "call across the sand" ajklsdkljas I know that's extremely literal but still!!!! they found each other again!!!!

and yeah just like, I feel like this is a nice obi and soka line throughout their entire relationship, including a reunion (if they had one):

am I dreaming / is it even true / cassiopeia / show me what I'm meant to do

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writer1 · 4 years ago

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Rex x reader: Changes

You were a Jedi before the purge, you were reckless and broke the rules. But you broke a major one, you fell in love and later married a clone. Not just any clone but Anakin Skywalker's clone Captain, Captain Rex.

You and Rex loved eachother more than anything, but you lost him after the purge. It's been fifteen years and you miss him every day, you wish to see him again but you don't think that it's going to happen.

You met up with Ahsoka about ten years after the purge, and you've been helping her with fulcrum business ever since.

She's sent the ghost crew to find someone that can help with finding a new base, but for some reason she won't tell you who they are.

You've asked a few times but all she ever says is that it's a surprise and she gets excited, you don't understand what the surprise would be. Maybe it's an old friend from the clone wars. It's been two days and you have started getting impatient.

"Y/n, the ghost crew are back." You smile and follow Ahsoka to where the ghost attaches to the ship, you can't wait to find out who it is.

The ghost crew walks out, smiling you wonder what they're smiling about when an old man with a white fluffy beard walks out from behind them, freezing when he sees you. You can't believe it, it's Rex.

"Rex?" You walk closer to him when he looks down and pushes past you.

"I'm sorry, I have to talk to Commander Tano." You feel hurt encompass your heart, Rex just completely ignored you. He didn't even care that you both haven't seen eachother in fifteen long years, you stifle a sob as tears come to your eyes and Hera walks over to hug you.

She knows that Rex hurt you, she doesn't know your past but she can tell that you have a broken heart. You hug her and bury your face into her shoulder, you can't hold the tears back any more.

×××

It's been about two months since Rex joined the rebellion and he's been avoiding you the whole time, you should have known that he wouldn't love you anymore. You only dated for two years, he must have fallen out of love with you. You wonder if he maybe found someone else, but it seems that you aren't the only one he's avoiding.

He's hardly talked to Ahsoka as well and she's been feeling very hurt over it as well. You don't understand why he's acting like this, it's really pissing you off. So you and Ahsoka came up with a plan, she's asked Commander Sato to send both you and Captain Rex on a mission together.

Once you're on the planet, you will corner Rex and talk to him about what's happening. You and Ahsoka hope to find out why he's doing this.

You and Rex head out on a mission, heading to lothal to see how things with the empire is going. It's pretty bad when you search but then you lead Rex into a field, finally able to confront him.

"What's wrong with you." You ask him bluntly, and he turns around do fast you fear he might have whiplash.

"What?"

"Why have you been avoiding Ahsoka and I. Did we do something wrong, I understand if you don't love me anymore but to ignore Ahsoka. Your little sister, that's not right Rex." He stares at you with wide eyes, you stand there waiting for an answer.

"I... I don't hate you." What other reason does he have to avoid you then.

"Then why Rex!" You yell, completely pissed off now. You don't care what the Jedi taught you about controlling your feelings. You're done!

"Why have you been avoiding me! Why did you not even spare me another glance when you got to the rebellion! Why did you break my heart." The last part is whispered, Rex is looking at you with tears in his eyes. You don't understand. You suddenly see a blaster shot fly past your head and turn to see a large group of storm troopers running and shooting at you.

You and Rex start running, only to realize that there's another group of storm troopers running from the opposite direction.

You pull out your lightsaber and start deflecting shots as Rex starts shooting, you're fighting your hardest but it's to no avail as you get shot in the arm with a force inhibitor and pushed to the ground. Loosing your lightsaber, you're staring at the end of a blaster barrel.

You try to think of a solution when you hear a growl, you look up to a grey blur striking the storm troopers, they start running in fear, when the blur slows down you realize that it's a giant bipedal Wolf. You can tell that you would only reach the bottom of its chest when you're standing straight, it's gigantic.

You stare at it in fear, until you see the tattered remains of Rex's pants on it and look over to see Rex's armor on the ground. You put two and two together, realizing that this is Rex, your husband. You watch him run, standing up and following him, leaving your forgotten lightsaber behind.

You follow him into a cave, composing yourself outside for a few minutes before walking in. You see your husband's now large for sitting in the back, you walk over and realize that he still teaches your face while sitting.

You walk close to him, making your steps loud as not to startle him. You place a hand on the back of Rex's shoulder, feeling the grey fur underneath of it. You feel him flinch and he growls.

"Get away from me." He says quietly, his voice is so much different from the man you knew. But it's still Rex's voice, you don't know how you can tell with how deep and growly it's gotten but you somehow know. You try to ignore the feeling of hurt that comes from him growling at you.

"No. I'm not leaving you Rex." He grows again even louder.

"I SAID LEAVE! Please." The last part is whispered, almost a plea. You feel so bad for Rex, you start to softly run your hand up and down his shoulder, wondering how long he's been going through this alone when you suddenly realize.

"Is... Is this why you've been avoiding me? Why you completely ignored me when the ghost crew brought you?" Rex is shaking now and he nods, you feel tears come to your eyes as you realize that the past few months of him actively avoiding you wasn't because he hates you but the opposite. He wanted to protect you, and he was afraid of what you would think of him.

"Oh Rex." You exclaim, you can't believe that he's gone through this alone. You wonder if his brothers even know.

"Do Wolffe and Gregor know?" Rex shakes his head and you sigh, he's been going through something this big all alone. Not even telling his own brothers. You walk around his side slowly and he freezes, you can tell that he's terrified of you seeing him.

You reach the from of him and can finally fully see what's happened, he's changed so much. His head is a wolfs while his body is more human esque, you can see that his body is much more muscular than when he's human.

You look into his eyes and feel your heart clench, they're yellow and filled with fear. A tear falls down and into his fur, so you reach your hand over slowly, stopping when he flinches. You freeze, as soon as he looks at you once again you reach over and softly wipe the tear away.

You move your hand down to his snout, there's white fur where his beard is when he's human. You can see white fur speckled all over him, but theres quite a bit on his stomach. You hear him whimper in fear, so you lean down and kiss his forehead.

"Oh Rex, it's okay sweetheart. I'm not leaving you, I promise."

"You need to leave, cyare. I could hurt you." You sigh and lean your forehead against his, giving him a keldabe kiss. You try to put all your love for him into it.

"You'd never hurt me, Rex. You're still you, fur and all." You kiss his forehead again and he finally breaks, pulling you against him softly until you're sitting in his lap. He lays his chin on your shoulder since he's taller than you and starts crying softly.

He's trying to hide it from you, feeling embarrassed but he can't help it. He loves you more than anything and staying away from you these past few months has killed him.

"I'm so sorry, cyare. I know that I broke your heart, and hurt Ahsoka. I'm so sorry." You shush him, rubbing the back of his head softly.

"Shhh, I forgive you sweetheart. I'm not happy that you ignored and avoided me but I understand why, I still love you more than anything." Rex pulls you closer, you reach up and kiss his shoulder softly. You can't believe that the whole reason he was avoiding you was because he is a werewolf now.

"I love you so much, cyare. I was so scared of losing control and hurting you, or you being afraid of me." You wish that he had told you sooner, but you are going to fix this. You won't let anyone or anything hurt him.

"I'll never be afraid of you. Like I said, you're still Rex. Just fluffier." You run your fingers through his fur for emphasis, getting a little chuckle out of him. You smile but you have to get back to more serious matters.

"You're going to have to tell Ahsoka, and your brother's. When did this even happen, Rexter?" You ask him and he sighs, snuggling into you.

"It was only a month before the ghost crew came and got me, I was bitten by a strange creature. Next thing I know I'm hiding from my brothers who were shooting at me, I told them after I was human again that I was searching in another place for the monster."

"Oh, Rex. You should have never had to go through that, and you won't have to go through this alone anymore. Okay. I promise." Rex nods, he loves you so much. More than he could ever say in words. You kiss him on his shoulder again, you know that you and Rex will work through this. And neither of you will ever part again, no matter what happens. Even if this is permanent, he's still Rex. And that will never change.

Taglist: @captainrexisboo @a-dorin

#wererex au #captain rex #wererex x reader #wererex #star wars clone wars #werewolf clone wars au #werewolf rex x reader #rebels rex x reader #rebels rex #rebels wererex #rebels wererex x reader #old rex #star wars rebels #my writing

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unfortunate17 · 4 years ago

Note

Oh, so much delicious angst... If you're up to it, 4 or 23 from the promt list for obikin. Thanks in advance.

I’m stupid because I didn’t know which prompt list you meant, did both, and then realized you most definitely meant the dialogue one LOL.

So here is 23 from HERE (“I would’ve died for you.”) and 23 Angst from HERE (“When did you stop loving me?”) combined!

Happy New Year!

I re-wrote this like 6 times before I gave up, hopefully it’s still reasonably enjoyable to read 😩

Anakin brings him home from a sub-surface level bar six weeks after Obi-Wan returns from Naboo. Obi-Wan has already had a few too many drinks, wallowing in his misery. Even the bartender-bot had started to look at him with pity.

It’s more than he can say for Anakin.

Anakin simply pulls him into a speeder without so much as a glance, deposits him into his refresher, and shoves him into bed once he’s sure Obi-Wan’s not going to retch or hurt himself. There’s a calculated coldness to his actions, all of Anakin’s usual playfulness has all but vanished. Much like his possessions from their quarters.

He still remembers that morning clearly. He’d leaned over to drop a hasty kiss on Anakin’s cheek, already late for his morning meeting, when Anakin had bristled uncomfortably. Obi-Wan had looked at him with an unspoken question spelled out on his tongue, but Anakin had only shrugged, mumbled something about how weird it was seeing Obi-Wan without his usual facial hair.

By the time he’d returned, Anakin had been gone. His tools and droid parts and clothes nowhere to be found. Ahsoka hadn’t been able to look him in the eyes when Obi-Wan had asked her about him.

Now, for a moment, the two of them regard each other. Anakin looks tired, the area under his eyes smeared dark, skin pallid like he hadn’t been sleeping. The sight sends a pang through Obi-Wan and without thought, he reaches out to draw Anakin close.

Anakin flinches away immediately. “I’ve brought you home like Master Windu asked,” he says stiffly, “I’ll be going now.”

Obi-Wan watches him shuffle, ice spreading steadily in his veins. The anger, he had been expecting, but never this stony silence. Truthfully, he’d take anything, any outburst, if it only meant Anakin would look at him again with something other than steely blankness.

He reaches out to catch one of Anakin’s hands. If Obi-Wan had been sober, he’d have probably lost his nerve by now, but alcohol has always made him far braver than he should be. He drags Anakin down until he’s kneeling between the V of his knees and presses a hand against the sharp cut of his jaw. They’re eye-level now, even if Anakin isn’t looking at him.

“Come by for breakfast tomorrow, my dear,” he murmurs gently. “I’ll make flatckaes.”

“I’m a better cook than you.”

“Perhaps after then,” Obi-Wan swallows. “I’ve missed spending time with you. We can do whatever you’d like,” he attempts a cracked smile, “I won’t even make you meditate.”

Anakin doesn’t raise his eyes from where he’s fixed them on the floor, but Obi-Wan feels his jaw work tightly under his fingers. “I’m training with Ahsoka tomorrow morning.”

“At night then,” Obi-Wan tries, biting back an unexpected sob, “maybe we could – catch a holodrama?”

“I can’t. I promised Padmé I’d see her.”

“Afterwards?”

Anakin lets out a long rush of air. “Obi-Wan – ”

The tone makes Obi-Wan flinch. He looks at Anakin, slides his hand upwards, past the smooth skin of his cheekbones, and up into his lovely tangle of golden hair. He tries to memories the curve of Anakin’s mouth, the furrow of his brow. Thinks of the way Anakin’s eyes used to light up at the very sight of him.

“The day after then,” Obi-Wan whispers. He leans in to kiss him, the motion nearly unconscious, but Anakin startles backwards once more.

Obi-Wan isn’t proud of the sound that escapes him. It’s a broken thing, punched out of his sternum, almost a whimper. He tightens his hold on Anakin when he tries to stand. “Anakin, please,” he begs. The whiskey makes his tongue thick, the words difficult to shape in his mouth.

Anakin allows his grip, sits back down. He squeezes his eyes shut, pained, and Obi-Wan’s heart hammers at the thought of causing it.

It was really only a few weeks ago that they were pressed together in this very bed, Anakin laughing into his neck, rubbing cold feet into his shins. The notion is unthinkable somehow, makes Obi-Wan ache.

Now, there is only silence.

Obi-Wan clears his throat, and the sound is loud, a cacophony in a moment in which even the force dares not to breathe. He’s not pleased with the words that fall out of him next, but Obi-Wan can’t quite hold them back.

“When did you stop loving me?” he asks, then immediately regrets it. Obi-Wan doesn’t want an answer, not truly.

At this, Anakin’s gaze snaps back up to him. He looks even more tired now, face drawn. But his eyes still widen in what Obi-Wan thinks is shock. Or maybe surprise.

Obi-Wan waits, but Anakin doesn’t speak, providing no justification or answers. He simply sits back on his haunches and looks miserable, put-out. His shoulders are bent under a weight that he should never have to carry. Obi-Wan grits his teeth against the knowledge that he’s somehow added to it.

Finally, Anakin sighs. “I should go.”

Obi-Wan settles his free hand over Anakin’s cheek, brushes a thumb over a lovely cheekbone. “Please don’t.”

Anakin allows the motion, but his brows furrow in what Obi-Wan knows is anger. “Why not?” he snaps. And finally, finally, there’s anger. A dark corner of Obi-Wan’s mind relishes having Anakin’s attention again. “I thought you were dead. I mourned you, Obi-Wan. You knew how I felt about you and you used it against me to sell your act. I would’ve done anything for you, Master. I would’ve died for you and you didn’t even care.”

“It was a poor decision,” Obi-Wan admits miserably. “I cannot tell you how much I regret it.”

“You’re only sorry because I’m upset,” Anakin snarls in response, “because I’m no longer in your bed. You came back and tried to pretend like nothing was wrong. Like what you did didn’t even matter.”

The sheer depths of his failures are difficult to consider for too long. Obi-Wan’s throat hurts. The force reveals nothing, empty and cold as it is, his connection whiskey-dulled.

And really, Anakin is right.

What does Obi-Wan’s apology even mean? Obi-Wan, who has always kept his emotions close to his chest, guarded, even when Anakin had expressed his desire for more, asked for something as simply given as verbal reassurance. He’d spent so long working through his own feelings, his own struggles, that Obi-Wan has never stopped to think that perhaps one day, Anakin might no longer be interested in waiting.

“That’s not true Anakin,” he insists, bringing Anakin close. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

Anakin resists. Obi-Wan watches him, desperation rising with every breath. He thinks of never really seeing Anakin again, of being alone in these wretched quarters. Thinks of watching Anakin with another, someone far more worthy, who would never dream of betraying or hurting him.

Even more horrifyingly, Obi-Wan thinks of someone in his own place. Of someone basking in the warmth of Anakin’s love, his fierce loyalty, enjoying the gentleness of his hands, the curve of his spine in bed.

Obi-Wan is going to be sick.

Tears glob in his throat, splinter at the corner of his eyes. The burn of alcohol in his veins is waning now, a chill settling in his bones. “Will you ever love me again?” he asks at last.

The ensuing silence is enough to make Obi-Wan’s vision go blurry with tears.

Anakin’s posture doesn’t soften, but emotion ripples across his face. Obi-Wan watches the line of his throat as he swallows, a muscle jumping in his jaw. “Obi-Wan,” his voice is tight, “gods, please don’t cry.”

“I’m sorry,” Obi-Wan offers again. He forces himself to let go of Anakin then, even if he can’t help but trace his shoulders one last time. Obi-Wan rakes his eyes over Anakin’s face, the softness of his features, the brightness of his eyes. “I love you,” he presses a fist to his mouth, trembling, “You will always be the single most important – “

“Stop,” Anakin says. His mouth twists unhappily and he leans forward, tucking his forehead into Obi-Wan’s chest. His voice is muffled now. “Please. I can’t bear to see you like this, Master.”

Obi-Wan heaves in response, shivering. He cups the back of Anakin’s head, rubs at the nape of his neck gently. Tries to pour what he can never express into what remains of their bond.

Anakin shakes his head once, the motion decisive, before he leans back and maneuvers Obi-Wan into bed. The world spins for a moment as Obi-Wan’s head settles into the pillow. He wants to say more, but he’s not sure if he has any words of value left.

But then Anakin is climbing into bed beside him, folding around him. He thumbs clumsily at the wetness on Obi-Wans cheeks even as Obi-Wan clings to him like he might vanish at any moment.

“I was angry,” Anakin admits quietly, words trembling on a shaky breath. He rubs Obi-Wan’s back, tucks his face into his neck. “But I didn’t want to hurt you like this. I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to apologize for, my love.”

“No,” Anakin holds him tighter. He kisses Obi-Wan’s head. “You’ve always taught me not to seek revenge. What I’ve done is – this isn’t what I wanted.”

“Anakin – ”

Anakin shushes him, pulling the blanket up around the both of them. His chest trembles. “Sleep, Master. We’ll talk more about this in the morning.”

Obi-Wan curls an arm around him, tries to calm his racing heart. “You’ll stay?”

“Always.”

#izazov #obikin #my writing #my bf took one look at this and went this needs to have a happy ending its the new year so I changed it #IDK I WROTE so many versions of this and hate all of them AHH IDK IDK IDK IM SORRY #ask #obikin fic

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nimsajlove · 3 years ago

Text

Found you (II/?)

This is really hard to come up with and I don’t know why! You know, I love Dogma. But I think I don’t love writing him...

Ao3 Brothers-AU Part I

*~*

For a long time they just sat there, Dogma trembled every now and then and finally, Ahsoka slipped off her robe and wrapped it around his shoulders. The men checked on them a few times, but held themselves in the background. Dogma didn't seem to notice. „Kamino?“, he finally asked quietly, his voice small and lost. „Has nothing to say about any clone anymore.“, Ahsoka assured him and he nodded against her shoulder. „Krell?“, he asked after a few minutes of silence. Damn it, for Dogma this had only happened recently, while Ahsoka had long buried Krell deep in her memories. „Wasn't a Jedi anymore, you are okay.“, she muttered and Dogma nodded again, he seemed to collect his thoughts. „Tup?“, the question was even quieter than the last two, it almost ripped Ahsoka's heart out. „No, I'm sorry Dogma.“, she replied softly and felt Dogma just dully nod again. He looked numb. They wouldn't get anywhere like that... „How about we go and look for your bunk?“, suggested Ahsoka softly and Dogma winced violently, she hastily put her scarred hand on the back of his head and let his face rest on her shoulder again. „It's okay, I'll stay right here.“, she quickly rowed back and waited.

Her back became stiff from sitting for a long time, her neck ached and there was a hint of a headache that began high in her Montrals. The last few days had been... long. She wasn't really tired, just empty. Drained. Curling up on the floor in her study with the others sounded very tempting. „I'm sorry.“, Dogma suddenly mumbled quietly and as if by reflex Ahsoka ran her fingers over his short hair. „You don't have to feel sorry for anything. I'm sorry that we didn't get you earlier.“, she replied quietly and when the clone started to get up she released him from her embrace and moved away slightly, giving him room to straighten himself. His eyes were red and slightly puffy. But he seemed calmer. „You were looking for me?“, he asked softly and rubbed his arms under her robe, shivering. Ahsoka nodded hastily, she had a lot to make up for! „Of course. I'm sorry that I couldn't be a better sister to you before.“, she apologized again and Dogma winced, but this time he managed a small smile. „I would be fine, if we could become friends. Sir.“, he muttered and it conjured a real smile on Ahsoka's face. This time she would do it right! And she would not lose this friend, because the war was over. Carefully she offered him her hand. „Friends?“, she took up his suggestion and when he clasped her fingers his hands were cold, but his grip was gentle. „Friends.“

Her comlink blinked at her demanding and Dogma watched her throw the thing a restless look. „I'm holding you back, am I?“, he muttered and Ahsoka shot him a sharp look. „Say that never again. I'll take as much time for my men, as each one needs.“ Taking a deep breath, she paused. „But I would really like to take a look at the others. Would it be okay if I call Kix?“, she asked and although Dogma's shoulders tensed, he nodded curtly. She didn't want to stress him any more than necessary, but her brothers would certainly do their best to care for Dogma. She notified Kix. „Grab Thud and check on Dogma a little bit, okay? I'll go out and assign each men a medic.“, she murmured, Thud would certainly get along wonderfully with Dogma. The young clone was quiet and reserved. And he would take Dogma with him to Hug, who was perfectly gentle. „Good, now that we have the capacity. Give me a few seconds.“, Kix answered tinny and cut the connection.

Ahsoka slowly turned to Dogma, he watched her. His eyes shone tiredly, but he no longer flinched with every move she made. „I called Thud too, he will help you find a bunk. Is that okay, or should I call someone else?“ Dogma shrugged. „You are the general.“, he muttered and Ahsoka sighed, she shook her head. This would be some hard work. „And you have the right to say no.“, she countered and this time he actually smiled gratefully. „I know. Thanks sir.“ Footsteps sounded and Kix entered, carefully followed by Thud. Neither of them wore helmets. Ahsoka rose. „If you need anything, let me know.", she informed everyone and with a gentle smile she disappeared out into the corridor.

Dogma wasn't sure what to do with the situation. Tup, his batchmate, was gone. The world he had returned to seemed to be different from the one he had left. And Comm- General Tano was so much older! And calmer. And looking at Kix now was like looking into a different face than back then. The Medic had lost the hard pull on his mouth, instead fine lines had dug themselves around his eyes. They made him look tired and sad. It was all strange, but the hair was even stranger! Kix had ALWAYS found time to maintain his hairstyle. Why did he stop doing that? And he wasn't wearing blue, his armor was now adorned in bronze. „Dogma.“, the medic suddenly greeted and his soft voice tore Dogma from his thoughts. Had Kix always sounded so calm? He didn't know, had only spent time with him on the battlefield. „Sir...“, Dogma answered uncertainly and watched as Kix put down his backpack and came a little closer. „May I?“, he asked, Dogma couldn't remember the medics ever asking for his permission! He shrugged his shoulders a little and Kix sat down next to him on the uncomfortable cot, who had covered it with blankets?

Kix pulled his backpack towards him and opened it, rummaging around a little. When he looked up they both paused. No, these couldn't be tears. Medics didn't cry, Dogma was 100% sure of that. Right? And yet Kix's eyes shimmered suspiciously... „Kriff.“, Dogma muttered and hastily pressed his lips together again. Strictly speaking, Kix was ranked far above him. He had no right to speak so freely in front of him, that was wrong. But it had also been wrong to practically cling to his new general. Kix laughed dryly, ah. There was the trooper Dogma knew. „I'm so sorry.“, the medic sighed and rubbed his face with one hand before he called up the most important vitals of his patient with a small scanner. Dogma eyed him critically, he had never heard these words from Kix. Or even just thought that he would ever apologize for something...

Dogma did not find the capacity to do anything with this excuse. So he was silent and observed, before he had never taken the time for something like that. Just watch his brothers without a list of rules in the back of his mind. It was more interesting than had Dogma expected. Kix moved slowly but purposefully. Whenever he noted something on his datapad, he relaxed his jaw a little and every time he touched Dogma, he gritted his teeth. Dogma's gaze wandered aimlessly upwards, what was he actually doing here? Back then, just a few hours ago, so THEN... he had left the shuttle and accepted his death. And now he was sitting here!? „I think we got you back with no permanent damage... Maybe a little malnourished.“, Kix grumbled and Dogma nodded without really listening. „I'll see that he gets something nice.“, the other clone announced quietly, but Dogma winced violently nontheless. General Tano had brought two men here, but he had completely forgotten about the other clone next to Kix. „Dogma, this is Thud. Is it okay if he shows you your bunk?“, Kix asked carefully and Dogma took a few deep breaths, okay. Maybe a new face was good? He eyed Thud briefly, fine bronze stripes ran across his breastplate. The color of General Tano? Then he studied Thud's face and Dogma was surprised at how young he looked. Without the fine lines of worry and the shadows under his eyes, he looked years younger than Kix. His eyes seemed kind.

Dogma nodded and Kix seemed to breathe a sigh of relief, Thud smiled. When he reached out his hand to Dogma, he took it and let himself be carefully pulled to his feet. The world turned around him for a moment, then he caught himself and followed Thud out into the hallway. The cell block seemed unchanged, that was something at least. However, there was a lot more going on in the corridor than he expected. A few steps further he could see General Tano, she was standing close together with a soldier who Dogma did not know. But his ARC equipment and the blue handprint on a bronze background made it impossible, to oversee him. Ahsoka gave Dogma an encouraging look and the ARC next to her eyed him curiously, before he smiled encouragingly too. Dogma stared at her briefly and hesitated before nodding uncertainly in response. How else would you react when someone smiled at you like that? Except Tup, nobody had done that in a while. When Tano just kept watching him, Dogma turned and followed Thud.

On the way to the quarters, Dogma rarely let his gaze wander, most of the time he concentrated on Thud's back. That was easier, than to meet the eyes that followed him. So the hand came out of nowhere on his shoulder, he looked up frantically. Thud stopped and watched Appo take off his helmet with one hand and he grinned like a complete idiot.

Dogma just stood there, hands hanging uselessly, staring at Appo. He had never exchanged more than a few words with the other clone. What should he do now? „It's good to have you back.“, Appo smiled, squeezed his shoulder and then disappeared again with great strides. He turned the next corner. Appo was happy to see him again? Dogma blinked once, then twice. Had the others lost their minds? Nobody had ever been happy to see him again! Confused, he gave Thud a look, the younger clone smirked and then motioned for Dogma to follow him on. „Come on, Commander Rex has chosen a nice spot for you.“, he said in his soft voice and Dogma almost tripped over his own feet. The commander? Rex? Okay ... that was ... good. He remembered Rex as very headstrong but faithful. The rank of commander suited him, kind of.

He had just finished thinking when Thud stopped and opened the door to one of the quarters. Dogma looked up and met several smiling faces. He recognized one of them. „Welcome home.“, Burnes smiled and the corners of Dogma's mouth twitched up into a small smile, even as he lowered his eyes. Home huh? Even with Tup, it had been hard to feel at home anywhere. But when Thud grabbed his wrist and carefully pulled him into the room, he thought he could at least give this a chance.

#star wars #the clone wars #brothers-au #rescuing dogma #ahsoka tano #clone trooper dogma #clone trooper kix #clone oc thud #my ocs #I love dogma #but I think he doesn't feels the same #this is so difficult #no order 66

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lifblogs · 4 years ago

Text

Whumpay 2021: Day 1 - "I thought you were dead."

More Than a Jedi

read on ao3 1058 words post-rako hardeen arc, angst

“I thought you were dead!” Anakin cried, shoving Obi-Wan against one of the massive pillars in the lower levels of the Jedi Temple. His throat ached, and there was a pinching at the corners of his eyes. But no, he wouldn’t cry. He couldn’t cry. Or maybe he should. Let his master see what he’d done to him, see the pain. “Why would you do that to me, Obi-Wan?” he demanded.

Obi-Wan didn’t even struggle against Anakin, just let himself be held against the pillar, and it had Anakin balling his free hand into a fist. How could he just do nothing in the face of something so terrible? Something he’d done to hurt him?

“The Council—” Obi-Wan began.

“I don’t give a kriff about the Council. You… You helped raise me, and then you let me think you were dead?”

“Anakin, if you let me go, maybe we could have a more civilized conversation about this.”

Anakin gave him one last shove, and then turned from him, beginning to pace. He noticed that the grand halls, so vast in their enormity, had emptied quickly. Hopefully none of the other Jedi were going to get a Temple guard or even another member of the Council. That was the last thing Anakin needed.

This was private. What Obi-Wan had done to him…

“Why?” Anakin demanded once more, turning and pointing an accusing finger at him.

“I needed the enemy to believe I was truly dead.”

“Oh, and to do that you needed to hurt me?”

“I didn’t want to do that, Anakin.”

“Yeah? Well it doesn’t change the fact that you did. I was at your damn funeral! And so was Ahsoka. You didn’t just hurt me. You hurt her. She’s had karking nightmares about holding you in her arms as you died. Did you know that?”

To Obi-Wan’s credit, his face fell, and he seemed awash in guilt, the Force curling around him as if to protect a wound. Anakin wanted to stab at that wound with his own pain.

This was unbelievable.

How could…?

How could he do this to him? To Ahsoka? Didn’t he know that people cared about him?

“I… I didn’t know that,” Obi-Wan answered. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry’s not good enough.”

“Anakin, for the sake of the mission—”

Obi-Wan had been approaching him, and Anakin shoved him again.

“It could’ve been done another way.”

“Anakin—”

“There’s always another way!” he shouted. “When things go wrong, there’s always something else we can do, some other way to minimize the way we hurt others. We’re Jedi, Obi-Wan! We’re not supposed to be doing this to each other.”

“If we didn’t have attachments, perhaps it wouldn’t hurt so much.”

He noticed the use of the word we, but surely Obi-Wan didn’t truly understand attachment. If he did then they wouldn’t be having this conversation.

Anakin gave a dark laugh, throwing his arms out in exasperation. “Great. Attachments. Kriffing attachments! I hate hearing about having to let go. Aren’t we supposed to show compassion? How do we do that if we let go?”

“We must show compassion for all, but remain… separate.”

Anakin rolled his eyes, facing away from him again. He didn’t want to look at him, couldn’t look at him. If he did he was worried he would attack him.

Maybe he should attack him.

The Force pulsed around him wildly, as if telling him to do so. And why would it be wrong? What Obi-Wan had done was unforgivable. Truly, and wholly unforgivable. The hurt that he felt, the hurt that Ahsoka felt… How could he possibly make up for that?

“I can’t do it either,” Obi-Wan said. “I… I wished there had been another way.”

“Yeah, me too,” Anakin muttered, before beginning to leave Obi-Wan in the empty halls. Then, something came to him, something dark, a knife he could twist in Obi-Wan’s chest. He gave him one look back and said, “You know how you felt when Qui-Gon died? Remember that.”

A look of immense hurt crossed his former master’s face, and he reached out to Anakin through the Force. Anakin rebuked him, and a tear slid down Obi-Wan’s face.

“I… do,” Obi-Wan told him.

“Good. I hope it never leaves you.”

To Anakin’s surprise, Obi-Wan let him go. He didn’t try to go after him, or even call his name. Instead, he just stood there amongst his hurt. Anakin took his hurt with him.

His master had betrayed him. Hurt him. The man who had helped raise him, who had trained him, had let him think he was dead, all for a stupid mission.

There should’ve been another way. There must’ve been. But he supposed Obi-Wan hadn’t cared enough to find that path. Now Anakin wished he didn’t care, but he did. He cared so much. Even as he left him all alone in the vast, yawning emptiness, he cared. He loved him. Yet love was pain. So Anakin kept that pain, that anger. He was going to let it become part of himself because in the end, maybe it was better than complete implicit trust. He would just be betrayed again that way. No more.

No more.

Comforting darkness enveloped him, shielding him, and he brushed up against it like it was an old friend. In that moment, he was sure he knew it better than he had ever known Obi-Wan.

A Temple was coming down the hall, and signaled for him to stop.

Obi-Wan must’ve waved to them to get their attention and then said, “Let him go. Everything’s fine.”

What a funny definition of the word. But at least Anakin was free to go. He needed to get out of the Temple, get away from this Jedi nonsense for now. Maybe Ahsoka would want to come with him. So instead of turning to leave, he went to one of the lifts, going to check on his Padawan to make sure she was alright. And maybe, just maybe, Anakin needed her.

Like he thought he’d needed Obi-Wan.

In that moment, he promised himself he’d never hurt Ahsoka like that. His power would rise above the need for hurting others. It was his job to protect them, and that’s what he would do. He would become more than a Jedi, make himself stronger than any of them. Ahsoka would be safe.

#whumpay2021 #star wars: the clone wars #star wars #the clone wars #anakin skywalker #obi-wan kenobi #post-rako hardeen arc #sw: tcw #sw #tcw #star wars fanfiction #star wars: the clone wars fanfiction #the clone wars fanfiction #sw fanfiction #sw: tcw fanfiction #tcw fanfiction #fanfiction #writing #my writing

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cxptain-rex · 5 years ago

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escaping {Wolffe}

pairing: wolffe x reader

warnings: spoilers? order 66 so yeah

request: @spaghetti-666. I hope you enjoy this request! Tbh it made me cry. I hope the rest as well enjoys it after today’s finale. I have no words. Just enjoy. May the fourth be with you. 💕

***

Life isn’t certain. You are sure of it. The said thing take turns and sometimes it surprises you. Like when you think something will go a certain way and it doesn’t. Today is that day.

General Plo and yourself have managed to bring a Republic victory in the planet of Cato Neimoidia.

Everything was dying down. The droids as well. You landed just in time, the Wolfpack were cheering when something went off. One of the Jedi star fighter had been shot down and crashed against the columns of the city. Your eyes widen, Master Plo You thought watching the republic starfighters shoot your master.

Death wasn't kind. You knew that. It snatched where it could, taking people who were far too young, far too good. It didn't pretend to care, it didn't pretend to distinguish.

The hooded vale of death had hung over the galaxy for a long time, always threatening. It had never touched you quite so close. Death had ripped away a part of you, the part of you that was most loved.

Now you have to go. Your face sunken and haunted, your mind cold and empty. The more the seconds went on. The despair grew and you have come to learn that the galaxy had gone cold, because of the plague that was death, and war.

You turned towards the Wolfpack and your heart stopped. Their blasters turned pointing straight towards you. A frown tug on your features. You search for Wolffe, you find him doubled over clutching his head.

The first thing to pass your mind is the child in you. Wolffe’s and yours as well. You must protect him. But you must protect your lover as well. So you advance towards your family.

Taking staggering footsteps but you’re stopped. “Stay right there, Jedi scum” Comet snapped causing you to halt. “Guys...” you trail shedding your saber. The Wolfpack starts shooting and you deflect their bolts, jumping and advancing towards your star fighter. As tears stream down your cheeks you can’t help but look back as the Wolfpack and its Commander keep shooting.

As you hop into your fighter, you take off. You don’t look back, you can’t. If you do, you’ll stay and let yourself get killed along with your child. What’s gone wrong, you thought as you flew away from the planet. Leaving behind your master and your lover. Many thoughts fly by your mind. You lost your lover, the father of your child, and your own father.

As you make it into orbit, you sigh. Your astromech, R9, beeps sadly. “I don’t know what’s going on buddy, but Wolffe isn’t with us and nor is Master Plo” you sigh and it explodes. You sob and cry for them. For Master Plo, for Wolffe and for your family.

The pain in you is numb yet it flows like prickles into your heart. You close your eyes, you have no idea on what or where to go. No one reaches out through the force and you feel nothing but numbness. The only thing keeping you aflote is the child in you.

***

The vastness of space seems cold and welcoming as you fly through hyperspace. You’ve received a pull from an old friend. You felt them through the force while wondering across a deserted planet.

Now you’re on your way to Saleucami. Dread fills your being as the planet comes to view. R9 beeps exitedly causing you to smile. “Let’s see what we’ve got here buddy” you mumble entering the atmosphere of the planet. Green takes over the land as the view changes into one of nature. You spot animals and trees. It is almost like a peaceful planet.

You land your vessel on the outskirts of a farm. As you emerge from the fighter, R9 trails behind you beeping. Supposing you follow the trail of the farm animals which you spotted earlier.

A small farm comes to view. You walk further and people emerge from said farm. At first you don’t believe it but you can confirm it. Ahsoka Tano stands a couple of feet away from you. A gasp emerges from you as you stumble towards her.

“Ahsoka” you cry hugging her. She remains silent but hugging you back, you feel the pain she endured. Footsteps approach and you lift your gaze. A hostil demeanor falls on you as you shed your weapon. A hand covering your growing stomach. Captain Rex has come as well. You stand ready to fight.

“Stop, we can explain” Ahsoka reassures and you narrow your gaze at her and the clone captain. The togruta leads you inside. A family sits around the table at the middle and they smile at you welcomingly.

“Hello” you mumble softly as they smile back and you recognize the man of the family as a trooper. Yet you do not ask. It is not your business. They leave. Now Rex, Ahsoka and yourself have taken a seat around the table. And you wait for an explanation.

***

“So...you guys had chips implanted in you?” You say taking in the information. Rex nods solemnly as he remembers, Jesse is dead in a unknown moon. His vods are dead. Your mind drifts to Wolffe, he must be under the influence of the Order. Unconsciously a hand falls on your stomach as you rub it. Rex catches the gesture and his eyes widened. As you follow his gaze to your growing bump.

“It is his” You say as your voice breaks. A tear falls as you cry silently. Rex takes a tentative seat on your side. He lays a hand on top of yours. Silence overcomes the moment and you understand. Rex will do everything in his power to protect you and his vod’s child.

Wolffe is lost within himself. Your heart aches. It clenches as you think of your lover being nothing more than another mindless soldier. He’s always been a soldier, your mind says and you snap. You stand slowly and trudge your way out of the house.

Rex frowns as he and Ahsoka follow after you. “Where are you going?” They ask simultaneously and you turn back. “I’m going back for Wolffe and the rest” you say and it actually sounded more stupid than you thought yet you couldn’t give up on them.

Ahsoka’s eyes widen as she stares at you in disbelief. “Are you crazy?! You will get yourself killed and the baby!” she says and you shrug your shoulders. “I can’t let them die, Ahsoka” you mumble staring at the green grass around your brown boots.

“Y/N...Wolffe...he is—“

“I’m right here, cy’are”

Another voice joins the three of you. At first your heart skips a beat but then fear settles. You saw him draw his gun towards you. Suddenly you’re transported back to Cato Neimoidia. You take a step back.

Wolffe looks at you with pain. He understands. He saw your face in the Cato Neimoidia. He wanted to scream and shout for you to run. To turn back and leave him. To save yourself.

“It’s me. I swear...I won’t hurt you” he says taking a tentative step towards you. The conflict within you is doing a storm which leads you to frown. Taking a look at your lover you recognize him. His force signature stronger than ever and pure.

A sob ripples through as you throw yourself on him. Wolffe catches you with ease, he shushes your crying. You lift your head from his neck to meet his gaze. With tears trickling from your eyes, your lips meet his. Wet and salty and warmth. “I thought I lost you” you cry against him.

Wolffe remains silent. He holds you tighter against him. He enjoys the moment. Suddenly you pull away and his gaze lands on your growing bump. He lays a tender hand against it. A kick, Wolffe feels it. The clone commander’s eye widen. “A pup” he whispers rubbing your stomach.

“Our pup” you smile laying a hand on top of Wolffe’s. He smiles as a tear fall from his eye. He kisses your hairline pulling you closer.

***

A cry falls from your lips.

When the labour began the pain was more intense than anything you had ever imagined. Nothing could be more brutal, not whips or chains. The room was only the bed and four walls, the medical droids melting into the background as if they weren't even there. Is there anything more isolating than intense pain? Doesn't pain lock people in as effectively as any prison?

After, when your child was born, it was as if only sunshine existed the world, as if all the earth was ushered into harmony. You looked into those new eyes, a new consciousness, perfect and reaching out for your love.

In that instant you knew you would do anything to protect your child, that your love was as vast as the universe yet solid as rock. You were a mother and would always be.

Wolffe stands by your side cradling your form. He stares at the bundle. “A boy” you say gazing into your baby’s eyes. A pair of golden irises meet yours and Wolffe’s gaze. The perfect child, you think as the baby resembles Wolffe and yourself.

“Orion” Wolffe says as you smile softly at your newly born child. Rex and Ahsoka watch as well their little family member.

“That’s one hell of a baby” Ahsoka jokes causing you to laugh silently at her. Little Orion gargles catching Wolffe’s finger. The clone smiles at the baby and Rex smiles as well. Your perfect family.

Aside from the war and how it left you all scarred, you manage to strive for prosperity and happiness. You found it all in your family. In Wolffe. Perhaps you lost comrades and an old family. But you still have something bigger.

Love.

And you are mostly sure that it’ll be like that no matter where the shadow of the Empire resides across the stars.

***

A/N: I hope you guys liked this. You’re welcome to leave feedback! Reblog and like for future content. ❤️

tags: @notreallybeccab @colorfulloverbatturkey

#adri answers #cxptain rex #the clone wars #clone imagines #tcw imagine #star wars #the clones #commander wolffe imagine #commander wolffe x reader #commander wolffe #104th attack battalion #the wolfpack #general plo koon #tcw season 7 #order 66 #fix it fanfiction

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lilylilie001 · 5 years ago

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“Old Friends Not Forgotten” Review and Analysis

Spoilers for Star Wars: The Clone Wars S07E09

If you are interested in my reactions while watching the episode click here

If you want to read my rant about the thing that made my cry the most in this episode click here (disclaimer: I was still crying while writing this and that may have clouded my opinion about the scene. In this review I will go into more detail about that)

So then let’s get started! I have calmed down and feel now emotionally ready to actually interpret and analyse the scenes and not just bring across my emotions. But this still is only my personal opinion! So if you disagree that is fine, just please don’t be mean about it.

So the first scene we get is a parallel to the movie (aka the first arc of TCW) which I think is a pretty amazing idea. It shows how Anakin and Obi-Wans relationship has changed and how it has stayed the same. Anakin is as cocky and arrogant as ever. But this time he is not Obi-Wans student anymore. He leads his own men with his own plan and is just coming from his own solo-mission. Yes he wasn’t Obi-Wans Padawan in the movie and Rex was under his command back the too but their dynamic was still different. He still sees Obi-Wan as his former Teacher and as a Jedi Master and part of the counsel he is technically still above Anakin, but they act more on an eye-to-eye dynamic. More like brothers than father and son.

Anakin uses a smiliar trick as Obi-Wan did back in the movie. (I don’t know how the Republic and the Separatists handle that but it is considered a war crime in our world... Since Obi-Wan did it and never got called out for it I guess it is okay in their world...) But of course Anakin puts his own spin on it. That is I think a pretty good way to show how Anakin learned from his master. He did watch and listen but he is not like Obi-Wan. He likes to do things his way. And as long as it works he won’t stop.

Their friendly banter in this scene is also really in tune with the way they act with each other in the beginning of ROTS (especially in the deleted scenes). So it is not hard to believe that this takes place only days before.

Before Anakin does his own thing Obi-Wan says: “I know better than to try and stop you.” I really liked this line. Not only because it was funny but also because for me it had a bit of an bitter aftertaste. He does not approve of Anakin’s actions (or methods to be exact) but he doesn’t do anything about them. Anakin is an adult and Obi-Wan is done with his education but his former padawan is far away from being a Jedi Master.

Then we have the first moment with Rex. Again a beautiful example of their dynamic. The other clones do what Anakin say (they have to) but they also are a bit annoyed by their general and his plan. Rex on the other had has Anakin’s back, as usual. And he motivates his men to follow Anakin. The trust these two have in each other is just beautiful! Rex trust that Anakin knows what he is doing and Anakin trust that Rex is taking care that everything works. I am pretty sure Rex wasn’t given more than a few instructions haha

Anakins plan works and he learns nothing except that he was right. Again. I am not gonna go into to much detail about Obi-Wan and Cody but I will say this. As usual they care about and trust each other. Cody is like a friend and not just some clone to Obi-Wan and knowing that makes Cody picking up Obi-Wans lightsaber in a few weeks so logical. Also it makes Order 66 as usual even sadder.

I can’t help but feel that is episode feels like part of a movie. The opening battle. Very Star Wars. That would also explain the new intro and outro. A very nice ending to the show. Staring with a bad movie, finishing with good one. All in all this episode really played on nostalgia about the TCW Movie and I love it!

Okay back to the episode.

Ahsoka used the name Fulcrum for her transmission. It is a nice callback to Rebels and to the Ahsoka Novel. But with the republic (for example Yularen who becomes a impirial officer) knowing that she uses that name it feels like a bit risky to me to use it in the rebelion as a code name... Maybe I am thinking to much about that but yeah I had to write that thought down. Also Anakin first thinks it is Saw Gerrera, so that means he came up with that name? This just confused me...

So now I going to try to fangirl not to much about Anakins reaction to Ahsoka, which is hard. But I am going to talk about it because it is very important for his character. I personally don’t remember the last time I saw Anakin this happy. Ahsoka coming back into his life is for him obviously a thing he had wanted and hoped for for a long time. But at the same time he is so surprised that it happened.

The next feeling he goes through is concern. He is just immediately concerned about her and the reason she is contacting him. Perfect Anakin moment. He loves his adoptive daughter and of course he is scared about her wellbeing. He is Anakin! He always scared about the women in his life. So having this poking out under his happiness was a good call.

Obi-Wan on the other hand is just surprised. And Ahsoka herself is very distant. (gonna go into detail about that in a second)

The talk Obi-Wan and Anakin have while walking to Ahsoka’s ship is also very interesting. You can see Anakin trying to find a reason for her leaving. Like it is the will of the force. Meanwhile Obi-Wan has a mixture of quilt and anger. He was partly responsible for Ahsoka being kicked out of the order and therefor also for her not returning. But it also feels like he is mad at her for not retuning. Maybe (that thought had just crossed my mind) he is angry at her for breaking Anakin’s heart. After all Obi-Wan had to piece him together again. (There is an unfinished scene form the original 7th season were they talk about Ahsoka.) And now he feels like she should not be let off the hook just like that.

Or he really just angry that she left the order that he believes in.

Again we have a nice callback to the movie. I really love those. They feel fitting.

R2D2 is just amazing as usual and greets his masters daughter like a good boy.

Ahsokas face goes through so much in a matter of seconds. She looks at R2: happy. She looks up at her former masters: scared and unsure. She takes a step: confident. That is genius! I especially love that little moment of fear in her eyes. It makes so much sense when you look at her in the rest of the episode! And I personally think that it is Obi-Wan that she is cold towards. I think she has not forgiven him at all for his part in her trial. And she is not at all ready to face him. But she puts on a brave face because she has a mission bigger than her.

At first when she stopped Anakin I was a bit upset but i get it now. She does not want to have this in front of Obi-Wan and Bo-Katan. Anakin staying behind for a second and putting himself together again is also really fitting I think. He was so excited to see her and she is cold towards him. He either does not see that it is not about him or he feels the tension between her and Obi-Wan.

Anakin again becomes worried dad when she mentions Oba Diah. And it feels like she would want to tell Anakin but she has Bo-Katan next to her and Obi-Wan in front of her so she doesn’t. She also seems surprised that he still cares so much about her. I think she expected him to be a upset with her and not as open and happy as he is. (Maybe that was why she looked scared in the scene before...)

“What is one more?” This sentence is big. I mean yes Bo-Katan is not a friend of the Jedi and not a friend of Obi-Wan. But it also kinda shows the overall frustration with the Republic and the Jedi in the galaxy.

Anakin lighting the mood with a joke...that is just pre-Vader Ani at his finest!

Bo-Katan is not wrong in this scene but after everything she had done to sabotage Satine she should really get down form her high horse here!

You can just feel the tension leaving the room when Anakin and Ahsoka are alone. They start to banter and she immediately smiles. These two have still so much love for each other and truly enjoy each others company. But after that there is this small moment of silence. Again perfect moment. It just shows that regardless of that there is baggage here.

While walking down that corridor Anakin acts like a worried dad again. “It doesn’t matter to them. It is a sign of respect. They know what you went trough for them day after day. Battle after battle.” I choose to believe that he is also talking about him self when saying that. It is his way of telling her that he is proud of her. I don’t think she picks it up but the way he talks about it...that is his opinion of her for sure!

The Helmets...I just love them. I am not going to talk about them much. Their meaning is obvious and this is getting really long. I will also skip Rex for now (don’t worry he will get his paragraphs) same with the lightsabers.

Ahsokas face...she just feels proven right about the Jedi...

So I am not sure if Anakin’s worry is about Padme or the Chancelor. I mean they talk about the chancelor and he is close to him. But he looks really worried so maybe Padme?

Ahsokas and Obi-Wan argument. The scene is amazing! I have to say that. It showed their morals pretty perfectly and both are kinda right. Again the tension between them makes sense. It still hurts to watch it.

But also Anakin standing between them awkwardly is kinda fitting with his arc. He is so happy this whole episode that it is hard to see ROTS Ani but I think it still ads up. He knows they are both right. The war has to be won but also Mandalore needs help.

“Unfortunately Ahsoka is no longer a part of the grand army of the republic.” That one sentence made so mad at Obi-Wan. Yeah, he is technically just saying a fact but his attitude. He is partly responsible for that he takes no blame! Even Ahsokas reaction is just like: Are you kidding me right now? She just looks at him for a second and she looks so disappointed and hurt.

And Obi-Wan, he continues to look at her after she looked away and I don’t know but I see a bit of regret in eyes.

So apparently Anakin can promote Rex just like that. Don’t know why he never did it before. I mean we all know Rex would deserve it. But better later than never, right?

Interestingly enough the tension between Ahsoka and Obi-Wan is gone so quickly. It is fare away from their friendship in previous seasons but still. There is respect there again.

Of course Obi-Wan has to make a Kenobi joke before leaving. That really made me forgive him, at least a bit.

“Thanks for the support, as always.” I have not nothing to add to this sentence. Ahsoka’s words nailed the point I want to make about Anakin in this scene.

Okay now on to the lightsabers. Two things. First, he must have had them with him on the whole siege! So that means that Anakin Skywalker kept her lightsabers with him at all time to either remind him of her or just in case she came back to him! Yeah, attachment is problem with this boy...

Secondly...they are blue. All of Ahsokas lightsabers are green up to this point. So he either got her knew crystals or he played with them so much that the took on his lightsaber color. I don’t know what to say about that.

Ahsoka rolling her eyes at his braging is just wholesome. Nothing more to add there.

I really love their dynamic when they are alone. It is so pure and happy and loving...

“Good thing I taught you otherwise.” So again a sentence with so much meaning. Filoni just loves throwing these in there, right? Let’s analyse it (bc that is the purpose of the post after all). With this sentence he basically tells her that it is okay to disagree with Obi-Wan and that he is not holding it against her in any way. He himself does it. Especially with the scene from before in mind that is so powerful.

We have heard a multiple of Jedis saying that luck doesn’t exist so Anakin saying that shows he does not care about what the order thinks is right. He has his own right and wrong. For now that is not problematic but we all know who that ends...

And that means he tells her he raised a good person and not necessarily a good Jedi in her. (it is really late, my english is no longer working properly) Hopefully I got my point across.

The way Ahsokas stands in this shot... She is not a little girl anymore. She is a fighter. A warrior.

“Anakin! Good luck.”

I really have to take all my strength to stay calm while writing this. I don’t want this to be too emotional.

So. Okay. *takes a deep breath* Ahsokas last words she ever says to Anakin Skywalker. The next time she talks to him he is Vader. Good words. Less than I personally wanted but good words.

After what he told her before it is just so poetic. She wants the best for him. She wants him to be lucky. To succeed. But after what he said it is more. So much more. It is a rejection of the Jedi and an embrace of the light force. And... Damn with everything that is going to happen in ROTS having Ahsoka telling him words that the Jedi reject is just...

Moving on before I lose my mind. We still have Rex to cover.

Anakin and Ahsoka think they will see each other again. They think that they will win and be together again and then they can figure out what to do about everything. About them. About the Jedi. About Obi-Wan.They have no idea what the future has in store for them. And it is perfect. I aligns perfectly with other star wars media. ROTS, Rebels, Ahsoka Novel. They don’t hug. They don’t say goodbye. I hate it but it is perfect.

I love that Rex got promoted but he is gonna be Captain Rex for me forever. Captain or Sir. But he really does deserve his promotion!

Because this is really long already I will not talk about Bo-Katan and the Mandalorians but focus on Ahsoka and the Clones.

We get an amazing banter between Rex and Ahsoka were Ahsoka proves that she is Anakins Padawan after all and that she has Skywalker energy. It is really amazing to see her in her element again. She can use the force whenever she wants and kicks ass! This really was her childhood.

And then she saves a Clones because that is what Ahsoka Tano does. She knows casualties are a part of war but she saves who she can.

Rex is so happy to have her back! He smiles and smiles just like Anakin. And just like with Anakin Ahsoka is so relaxed with Rex. They are her home!

I just love the cinematography of her fighting. It really is just watching a Star Wars movie. I can’t wait to watch the whole arc in one go!

“Beat you.�� “Some things never change.” Wholesome. This is just wholesome.

Okay so that is it for me. I know there is still Maul and Bo-Katan to cover but I will talk about them after next episode!

But I will say this in conclusion: This is episode was stunning! Like everything was beautiful and meaningfull and thought out and detailed! I truly love this episode! I already watched it three times today. And I am so amazed by the animations! The characters facial expressions were on point! I had so much fun analysing them!

I hope that was interesting to read and honestly I am surprised if anyone got this far. Anyway I really loved watching the episode again frame by frame and note my thoughts (this took me 6h btw)

#tcw #sw #the clone wars #star wars #tcw s7 #tcw season 7 #old friends not forgotten #tcw spoiler #tcw s07e09 #episode analysis #star wars the clone wars #ahsoka tano #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #captain rex #bo-katan kryze #the clone wars season 7 #siege of mandalore

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jedimasterbailey · 4 years ago

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Below is another sneak preview of my “The Padawans” fic. Next chapter up should be by tomorrow! With the help of Quinlan Vos confronts her inner darkness and learns to let go of her past in order become the Jedi she was always meant to be 💙 Link to the fic below! Thank you @devondeal for helping out this story together 😊

Side note: How epic would it be to see Barriss confront a Sith version of herself?

You want me to do what now?” Barriss nervously asks.

The two Jedi were sitting cross legged across from each other inside the cave Quinlan has taken residence in. They had just returned from a morning Jar’kai training session as Barriss admitted to needing some refinement in wielding two lightsabers. Quinlan’s lessons were as tough as his looks as Barriss’s body ached in a way she hadn’t felt since her early lightsaber training days. She had hoped they would take a break and talk more about the mission at hand, but the Jedi Master had other plans.

Quinlan raises a brow, “Meditate. You haven’t been doing that have you?”

Barriss shakes her head,“Not since the trail. I tried once in my cell and it felt...so dark....cold...I couldn’t go through with it. It’s almost as if the dark side is a disease I injected myself with, it has yet to go away.”

Quinlan sighs,“I understand what you mean. I only just got rid of it just before you arrived.”

“Really? Even with my Master’s help?” Barriss asks, surprised. If there was anyone that could soothe anyone’s aching spirit, it was Luminara. It’s what Barriss adored the most about her Master. The older Mirilan’s calming voice and demeanor is what kept Barriss grounded through her apprenticeship.

Quinlan takes a long drink from his flask before answering. He then looked Barriss straight in the eye, his expression unreadable.

“Yeah...you see kid, the darkness came to us when we decided to not take control of something we had no business in. We made the easy choice, the one that felt right in the moment, but we failed to consider the consequences. There’s a reason why the ancient Sith died young or were sickly looking. It’s because the dark side of the Force is corrosive. To be fueled with rage and fear non-stop takes a toll on the body and soul.”

“Even when I returned to the Order, I still felt the darkness in me. I couldn’t meditate without being reminded of my sins and I was quick to anger on the battlefield. When I felt Aayla die...I completely lost it. I killed every single Clone within my reach, forgetting that these were men I considered to be my friends. I never considered the possibility that there was something bigger at play because the dark side doesn’t allow you to think clearly. I was completely blind to everything and had I had my head screwed on tight, maybe I could have saved Luminara.”

“When I finally came to, the guilt and grief was overwhelming, so overwhelming that I completely cut myself off from the Force and from my mind. I mean could you really blame me? I lost my Padawan and every one I loved just like that! And for what?! What was the point of any of it?! All the sacrifices we made all those years were all for nothing. I became a monster for nothing. We were all just pawns in Palpatine’s game.”

“I lived off the land for a while until I found a Wookie settlement not too far from here, that’s where I’ve been getting my supplies and food. I was content with just going through the motions. I’d be lying if I said that it didn’t feel nice to just be free from everything, to pretend I was never a Jedi or Sith or a war general. But the void was always there. It wasn't until I had a vision of Luminara being tortured in an Imperial cell that I realized that I needed to set things right for her. “

“So I confronted my past and refused to give up until I made peace with it. It was the most painful and difficult challenge I’ve ever taken on, but it’s worth it. I can’t undo what I’ve done, but I can decide how to live going forward. What got me through it was the promise I made to myself. I’m going to live the life that was taken away from my Aayla. Be a good man and help where I can. It’s the best way to celebrate her memory.”

“And then you came along and now I know how to repay Luminara back for all she’s done for me. Pass on what I’ve learned to her student so that she can be the Jedi the galaxy needs right now. You are Luminara’s only hope.” Quinlan finishes with a smile.

“You don’t believe you could save her?” Barriss says despite knowing the answer.

“You and I both know that only you could set your Master free.” Quinlan replies sincerely.

The validation weighed heavy on Barriss. As determined as she was to rescue her Master, the Padawan was still anxious on the obstacles she may face. Barriss owed it to Luminara to be successful. She needed her Master to know how much her apprentice loved her.

Quinlan breaks the silence,“I’m not sure what kind of evil you’re gonna face, but I know one things for sure. You’re gonna have to master the hardest lesson a Jedi ever has to learn, to let go. If you can’t let go of your guilt, your shame, your anger; you will not be successful. The Empire is counting on you to lose yourself to your emotions again. Make peace with your demons and you’ll become more powerful than their best fighter. That is how one grows from a Padawan to a Knight.”

“A Knight?” Barriss squeaked.

Quinlan nods, “Yes, Barriss. If I can return as a Jedi Master, there’s no reason why you can’t be a Knight. It’s time to complete your training Padawan, welcome to the beginning of your trails.”

“The Trail of Spirit.” Barriss concludes now that Quinlan’s meditation request made more sense.

“Exactly. You won’t be able to conquer the other ones until you’ve passed this one.”

With a deep breath Barriss accepts the challenge. Besides wanting to be reunited with her loved ones, Barriss’s greatest desire has been to rid herself of her past deeds despite feeling unworthy of redemption. Only now after hearing Quinlan’s story did Barriss feel ready to try.

“Tell me what I have to do.”

“Give yourself into the darkness and face your fears. Luminara is counting on your success, remember that. I’ll be right beside you the whole time.” Quinlan instructs, squeezing one of Barriss’s hands.

“And if I fail?” Barriss asks, chewing her lip.

“You’ll only fail if you allow for it and I know Luminara did not raise a quitter.” Quinlan reassures with a wink.

“May the Force be with me.” Barriss says, gripping tightly onto her knees.

“It always is.” Quinlan gently reminds.

Not even thirty seconds after Barriss closed her eyes and took her first deep breath, she was brutally reminded why she had avoided meditation all this time. The faces of all the Jedi killed in the bombing came to view as the voice of Anakin rang in her mind.

“Ahsoka trusted you!”

“Traitor!”

Her blood then ran cold as the all too familiar dark side energy began to fill her being. It was as if someone was squeezing her very heart with both hands making it hard to breathe as the pain was staggering. Barriss then snaps her eyes open and shakes her head, breathing hard as if someone were just choking her.

“I can’t do this!” Barriss pants, the darkness still brewing inside.

“Yes, you can.” Quinlan says sympathetically, gripping Barriss’s shoulders. “I know it’s hard, but you have to accept the pain. Whether you like it or not, it’s there. If you keep running from it, it will only fester. You just have to breathe through it and then you’ll be able to fight it. Now try again, I’ll breathe with you….trust me.”

With a weak nod, Barriss pulls herself back into position and begins to breathe deeply again, hissing through the ache blossoming from her chest. She could barely hear Quinlan’s own breathing over Ahsoka’s voice repeating the very line that has been a thorn in her heart since she first heard it back in the Jedi Temple. It was these words that replayed when she dueled the Togruta in the underbelly of Coruscant and what caused the thousands of tears she shed in her prison cell.

“...this woman is going to pay for what she did!”

Ahsoka had said this after Barriss tried to open up to her after the memorial service honoring the Jedi she accidentally killed. With Luminara gone and her sanity slipping more with each day, Barriss had hoped she could release to someone she thought wouldn’t judge her too harshly. A large part of Barriss believed that her one friend, the woman she grew to love, would have held that space for her, but she was wrong. Anakin’s hypocritical advice blinded Ahsoka to her silent plea for help. Although Barriss did not blame Ahsoka for feeling the way she did at the time, the words still stung nonetheless. Had Ahsoka been more receptive, Barriss was positive she would have confessed to her crimes right then and there.

But what’s done was done and now Barriss was left to relive that moment and hear those words over and over. The pressure in her chest has yet to let up as hot tears began to stream down olive cheeks as Barriss continued to breathe through it. Right before Barriss was about to give up, she remembered what Quinlan had said before her second attempt.

“...you have to accept the pain.”

Barriss then reached an epiphany. She allowed her muscles to relax and stopped crying, blocking out the sadness her memories ensued. As if she were falling backwards into a bed, Barriss allows herself to face the darkness she’s been shoving down for so long. In her mind’s eye, an image of Ahsoka looking at her after Anakin announces her guilt to the court appears, looking just as vulnerable and hurt as she remembered.

“Barriss? Is that true?” Ahsoka’s voice asks.

Barriss then said the answer she wanted to say at that time, but couldn’t.

“Yes, Ahsoka. It was me. I made a selfish decision and because of it I ended up hurting the very people I was trying to protect.”

Barriss then no longer felt the pressure or the cold and Ahsoka’s face disappeared. A new vision began to unfold into what looked to be a throne room. Though Barriss had never been anywhere like it, the space felt familiar. The grandious hall was dark with only moonlight peeking through the circular window that was behind a large black chair that was turned backward. Beneath her feet was a long blood red rug that ran up the steps to the seat, matching the large tapestries that hung from massive pillars.

“Welcome home.” a cool voice hissed from behind the throne.

“Home?” Barriss questions, her hand resting on top of her lightsaber hilt.

The chair then turns to reveal what appeared to be a clone of herself causing Barriss’s breath to hitch at the sight. Unlike Barriss, her duplicate peered at her with bright yellow eyes that shone brighter the moons in the sky complete with sunken cheeks and a paler green skin tone with purplish veins that pulsated just underneath the skin. Instead of Barriss’s usual blue hood, the darker version of herself wore a red one, with a more revealing, flowy black dress underneath. Her heart shaped belt was replaced with a solid black one with two lightsabers hanging from it. Barriss became nauseated, recognizing the lightsaber hilts to be Ahsoka’s white sabers.

The Dark Barriss then rose from her throne with a wide grin, “Why yes, don’t you recognize it? We grew up here!”

Barriss’s jaw and heart dropped now realizing that she was back in the Jedi Temple on Coruscant, a renovated one.

“What are you?” Barriss asks shakily as her twin walks toward her, her long dark hair floating in the air like her skirt and cloak.

The clone laughs, “I’m what you know you could become. You’ve done a superb job ignoring me, but you see… you need me more than you think.”

Scrunching her face in disgust, Barriss scoffs, “If you think I’m going to give into the dark side again and become a Sith, you are sadly mistaken. I am here to end this!”

Sith Barriss cackles, “You are a fool if you really think you can still be a Jedi! Have you forgotten that the Order failed you? That Ahsoka abandoned you? That you're responsible for the death of innocents? But you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself, they all deserved it.”

Before Barriss could retort, the Sith continued to speak, “It was the Order who made us into a soldier and kept our Master away from us. It was the Council who didn’t trust us or respect us. They only cared about their precious “Chosen One” and his friends. You were suffering and no one cared! Not even Ahsoka! We gave everything to the Order and for what? Nothing!”

“You’re wrong! Ahsoka cared and so did Luminara!” Barriss argues, swallowing a massive lump in her throat.

“Need I remind you that Ahsoka only rescued because she was ordered to?” her counterpart sneers.

Barriss deflates, “She could have rejected the request.”

“And lose her only protection against the Empire?” Sith Barriss snickers. “No. To Ahsoka, we are nothing more than a heartbreaking reminder of her past. We’re the reason why she lost everything. She could never love us the way we love her!”

Barriss couldn’t argue against her clone’s words as Ahsoka confirmed them when they argued during their journey to Dantooine. She just wasn’t sure if she could really go through the rest of life without Ahsoka being a part of it or worse, if Ahsoka did fall in love with another and cut Barriss completely from her life.

A cold hand caresses her face, forcing Barriss to look at her darker self once more, “It hurts doesn’t it? To know that after everything you’ve done for her, she could still leave us behind. It’s unfair… that’s why we need to do what must be done to make it all better.”

“I will not kill Ahsoka.” Barriss affirms, slapping the hand away from her face.

“Oh, but you will.” Dark Barriss replies, circling Barriss as she spoke. “She deserves it after what she’s said to us! If our love isn’t good enough for her, then she’s of no use to us! You can keep lying to yourself that you can go on without Ahsoka’s affections, but there is one thing you cannot deny. If you fail your mission, if Luminara dies… you will never forgive yourself.”

Barriss bows her head, “No… I will save her...I will not fail…”

“You will, it has already been foreseen.”

Barriss’s head shoots back up, “What do you mean?”

“The galaxy is under the control of two Sith lords; the Emperor and his apprentice. They are the ones holding Luminara hostage. They torture her just to get your attention and once you fall into their trap, they will kill her. You don’t have the power to eliminate them both...not yet at least.”

“The dark side of the Force is a pathway that may be unnatural, but it has its rewards. If you let me in, you can overthrow them both and ensure Luminara’s safety. It is the only way. You wouldn’t want to fail your Master again, do you?” probed Dark Barriss.

Now, Barriss was at a loss for words. She was not ready to face the possibility of Luminara dying. They needed to reconcile, Barriss had to prove to her Master’s that her decisions were her own and not her mentor’s. Turning to the dark side again would completely ruin her chances of earning forgiveness.

“You’re implying that my Master would want that for me.No! I will not let you in!” Barriss shouts with resolve, igniting her blue lightsaber. “I will rescue her without you and if I die trying then so be it!”

Gold eyes narrowed as Dark Barriss then snapped her fingers, causing two Stormtroopers to walk in with a shackled Ahsoka.

“Ahsoka!” Barriss cries out, her heart breaking at the amount of physical injuries the Togruta had.

Ahsoka then repeated the same lines Barriss once told her when she was possessed by a Geonosian parasite.

“Kill me… please….”

“I won’t!” Barriss says glaring back at her double.

“If Luminara isn’t enough for you to agree, then perhaps this will!” Dark Barriss threatens before raising a hand to Ahsoka. A red glow radiates from the hand causing Ahsoka’s life force to wither away.

“NO!” Barriss screams, clashing against the twin red blades her dark self wielded.

Her opponent then began to laugh again. With every strike and blow to their surrounding environment, Dark Barriss’s amusement grew. After what seemed to be an eternity of dueling, the dark side wielded raised Barriss into a choke hold.

Gasping for air, Barriss quickly came to her senses and realized what she was doing. She was making the same mistake she made the day Letta died. She was allowing her emotions to dictate her thoughts instead of making peace with them.

“It’s over Barriss. You have relinquished control over to me, you failed. You can kiss your dreams of redemption goodbye.”

Knowing exactly how to outsmart her enemy, Barriss lets her body go limp and closes her eyes to give the impression of defeat. She is then released, falling to the ground. Assuming that Barriss was no longer in control, the dark entity drops down to beginning fusing itself with Barriss’s body. A green lightsaber blade hidden from Dark Barriss’s view then spears her midsection causing the world around them to begin fading away.

“WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!” Dark Barriss screams before disappearing.

With a smile Barriss confesses, “I’ve let go. I cannot change what I’ve done and I still have a lot to learn, but none of that is worth turning to the dark side. I will free my Master and I will cherish Ahsoka’s presence in my life regardless of how she feels about me. I’m a Jedi and I won’t anyone or anything take that from me again, including myself.”

Barriss then wakes up to a worried Quinlan hovering over her. A significant amount of time had passed as Barriss could see stars outside the cave entrance. Despite her clothes being drenched in sweat from the day’s events and her body feeling stiff from laying on stone for several hours, Barriss never felt lighter. The weight that she had felt for nearly two years was finally gone.

“You alright kid?” Quinlan asks, offering a hand to Barriss.

Looking more serene than the Jedi Master has ever seen her, Barriss answers, “Never better.”

#barriss offee #quinlan vos #ahsoka tano #luminara unduli #star wars fanfiction

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