#and adds some lightness to a season that's been a bit dark

[the-oblivious-writer]

Let the Light In |7|

Tara Carpenter x Fem!Reader

Chapter Seven: Tis' the Damn Season

Summary: After that eventful night at Tara's apartment, you find yourself pondering on a few things, but your banter with Tara never ceases. There is enough on your plate as it is, so when you bump into a familiar face it catches you completely off guard

Warning(s): Swearing, making out, mentions of drinking & intoxication, r has a case of bad communication, chemistry (like the actual subject 😣), compulsions, & implied anxiety

Notes: I took over a year off to cut you readers some slack, tell a friend to tell a friend - she's baackkk! 🤭 Ik you missed these stubborn little jerks, so did I. Also not this chapter being at like 10k+ words. Even then, there was a bunch more I wanted to add but I figured I'd save it for the next chapter (already plotting) I didn't wanna keep you waiting any longer than I already have

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The box of pizza and plate of wings sat completely abandoned, forgotten, on Charlotte’s coffee table as her hands traveled to your neck. You let your own hands drop to her hips, pulling her in. Her lips felt soft, yet foreign. You ignored that thought and continued to kiss her, slipping in your tongue while she maneuvered her way onto your lap.

Everything felt hot, you could feel your face heat up as she ever so slightly played with the hem of your shirt. When you gave her the silent signal, she slipped a hand under your shirt—not too high of course, but enough to feel your hips. You felt goosebumps at her touch, suddenly feeling nervous. You once again pushed any negative thoughts to the back of your mind, continuing to kiss her. 

That’s when it clicked. Why you got so nervous all of a sudden, your mind was trying to tell you something, warn you.

You separated from her lips. She looked at you, a confused expression on her face. You weren’t meeting her eye line, feeling rather timid at the moment. “Are you okay?” She asked you. You barely heard her with your heartbeat drumming so loudly in your ears. 

“Um…” You cleared your throat, still not meeting her gaze. “Yeah… I just—sorry.” Charlotte’s expression stayed put as you managed to remove yourself from the couch. 

“Did I do something?” She asked, moving to also stand up. She looked at you with what you could only describe as confusion and concern. You couldn’t blame her one bit—one second you’re all over each other, the next you’re pulling back like she stung you.

“No—no, no, no,” you shook your head while gesturing with your right hand. “You did nothing wrong. I um,” you finally looked to meet her gaze, “it’s just been awhile, I guess.” You could only hope she didn’t see through your lame excuse, it wasn’t completely untrue. 

“Oh,” Charlotte said. “…Oh,” she then repeated when she realized what you meant. “Shit, I didn’t push you did I?” 

“I promise you didn’t do anything wrong. I’ve just been in a weird place  …for a while,” you shrugged, not expecting to add that last part, your tone getting lower as you spoke those words.

“I get it,” she mustered an understanding tone. 

A suffocating silence enveloped the room for a few seconds, causing you to look out the nearby window to be met with pitch darkness.

“It’s actually getting pretty late anyways and I’ve got an early shift in the morning…” You said while slowly getting your jacked that hung from the couch. 

“Of course. Call me?” 

“Yeah,” you briefly smiled at her while adjusting the collar of your jacket. “Sorry, again, for making things awkward,” you apologized while grabbing the last of your things.

“No, don’t worry about it. Stuff happens,” she waved you off while managing a reassuring tone. 

You nodded at her before muttering, “thanks,” and finally leaving the apartment. As soon as you walked out into the crisp night air, you exhaled your own pocket of air you didn’t even realize you were holding in.

That’s when it all came crashing down; the awkwardness, stupidness, and cringyness that came from the situation all because you were scared to let your situationship see your scars. 

Nice going.

You repeated words like moron, idiot, and dumbass while you walked to your car—the train of thought never breaking as you drove to your apartment. Manhattan’s late-night traffic didn’t exactly ease your frustration. You were in the middle of cursing out the car in front of you when your phone started to ring.

Still feeling ridiculously stupid, you were going to let it just ring out, but that was before you saw the contact name. 

You answered the phone. “Tara?” You immediately asked with furrowed eyebrows. Why on earth is she calling you so late?

“Y/NN,” you heard her slur over the phone. Your grip tightened on the steering wheel, immediately realizing what you were about to be in for. Before you could get another word out, she interrupted you. “Have I ever told you you’re so gorgeous it actually hurts?” 

Your eyes widened as heat rushed to your face, your hands nearly slipping off the wheel. The tips of your ears suddenly began to feel very warm while your mouth opened and closed a few times before you could get sound to come out.

“I—uh,” you cleared your throat before continuing. “Where are you right now?”

“Hommee. Where else?” Her answer was followed by hiccups.

“I’m coming over,” you said firmly before hanging up. Being distracted any further by her voice was the last thing you needed right now.  You silently hoped nothing drastic was waiting for you at her apartment as you changed your route.

When were you going to stop jinxing things?

—

It had now been a few weeks since the night at Tara’s apartment took place. Not long after you put her to bed, you gave yourself some time to reflect on her words. And ever since that night, you have been repeating them in your head whenever you were with the Carpenter. It seems as though she was able to move on easily, at least, her silence on the topic made it appear that way. On the outside, you gave the impression that you too had moved on from that night, that it had not affected you whatsoever. But on the inside, you were in emotional turmoil. With replaying your memories, that same tightening feeling in your chest that you felt that night reappeared.

There were so many key points of that night to completely crumble over; for starters, the incident with Charlotte. You are beyond embarrassed thanks to your repulsion for emotional intimacy. You knew if she saw your scars questions would ensue, thus putting you in an uncomfortable position to spill your guts out. The last thing you needed was for that to happen, but that alone had you thinking.

You’ve been on over four dates with Charlotte now and you have no idea where you stand with her. She’s just a situation-ship as of right now, and for all you know she could be seeing this as more. But the thought of asking her where you stand with her makes you emotionally grimace and cause your stomach to churn. 

If you can’t even talk to her about your relationship status, should you even continue seeing her? This question had you thinking even further. Maybe you rushed into this relationship, maybe it was far too soon. Was nearly a year too soon? 

That was the last time you were in a relationship, the last time you allowed yourself any form of emotional intimacy with a partner. But that was the result of almost three years, years of building trust and connection. It was going to take a lot more than just a few dates with someone you don’t truly know to recreate that. It was going to take effort.

As for the Tara part of that night, you didn’t even know where to begin. Where could you? From her compliments to her insults, the night was certainly an eventful one. And just to think, you had seen her just hours before and there hadn’t seemed to be any issues. 

The coming semester is certainly going to be an interesting one.

—

You and Tara were in your apartment, huffing and groaning could be heard throughout your room. She sat cross legged at the edge of your bed while you were leaned up against the headboard. Papers sprawled all over the bed, pens and pencils scattered—almost imitating what the inside of your mind currently looked like.

“Was the first sheet you gave me—was it nine or seven?!”

You let out a huff, mixed with a long sigh, at Tara’s repeated question. After running a hand down your face, you slid closer beside her to get a better look at her paper. “This is table nine right here,” you emphasized by rapidly tapping your pencil on the spot of the paper you wanted her to focus on.

She rolled her eyes as she mumbled, “Oh my god—” She turned her head to looked at you as she huffed, “Answer my fucking question with a yes or a no; was it a yes—was it a nine or a seven?”

You muttered a few curses under your breath—curses you knew she heard because of your close proximity—before taking your pencil to her paper once again. “Alright, okay so I’m gonna circle this—”

“What the fuck—?!”

“This is—this is nine,” you glanced at her for a moment to make sure she was paying attention. All you were met with was a dumbfounded look.

“But what’s the top??”

“That’s table seven.” 

There were a few seconds of her just staring at the paper and you looking between her and the paper until she said something.

“What?” Her voice indifferent.

“So I’m assuming you don’t get it…”

She turned her gaze from her paper to you, hitting you with a hard glare. “No, asshole. I don’t get it.” She then threw her pencil to the side and got up from the bed. Her arm brushes against yours as she does so but you choose not to pay any mind.

“I’m so tired of chemistry,” she all but whined before dramatically plopping back down on your bed face first.

“You’re the one that said you needed help,” you pointed out while curiously flipping through her notebook. “I remember wanting to stick with routine and work on our history project.” Her doodles are cute.

“So helpful,” she sarcastically remarked, muffled; she was still face planted on your mattress, right beside you. 

“I try,” you reply in a monotone voice; you were still flipping through her notes as you talked.

Tara rolled over on her back, pushing loose strands of her raven hair away from her face. She exhaled before clearing her throat—which didn’t get your attention, so she tried again …and again, after the third time she just settled for throwing a nearby pillow at your head.

You finally turned to look at her with furrowed eyebrows and a hand to the back of your head. “Um, can I help you?”

“Can we just start on the math now?”

“You couldn’t have asked that without the pillow to my head?” You asked incredulously.

“Do you have this, like, mental illness that prevents you from properly answering ‘yes or no’ questions—”

“Get your other notes out before I change my mind.” 

Tara scrambled over to the side of the bed, reaching over to grab her bag that sat beside your bed. She quickly wiped off a giddy smile as she took out her needed papers. You were neatly setting her previous papers to the side as she did so.

“Alright, what do you got for me, Carpenter?” You inquired while she scooted back next to you; you’re both sitting side by side, leaning against your bed’s headboard as you looked at the page of notes she was showing you. 

“This is basically everything that's going to be on my exam next week,” her stress regarding her exams was evident from her tone. “Some topics I’m good with, other’s I’m okay with, and a few I’m struggling with.” She turned to look at you, eyes practically burning holes in the side of your head with a pleading look. Pleading for you to help her.

After a moment of silence—of you intently staring at the paper—you hummed to yourself, nodding, as you finally returned Tara’s gaze before speaking. “I have highlighters; I want you to circle the ones you’re okay with in orange, and the one’s you’re struggling with in red,” you told her while reaching into the drawer of your nightstand for the highlighters. 

All you got was a brief, “Mhm,” while you blindly thrashed your hand around for the highlighters. When you finally got the right colors, you handed them to her before getting up from your bed which earned you a confused look from the other girl.

“Where are you going?”

“Bathroom. Don’t miss me too much,” you couldn't help but smirk at the girl, leaving before she had the chance to counteract. You weren’t sure if you were smirking because of your own remark, or if it was thought Tara was missing you. It definitely left a warm feeling inside of you.

She doesn’t miss you. She wants less of you, remember? Your head reminded you, causing that familiar feeling of your chest tightening. Your breathing was still a bit hollow from the feeling as you finished up in the bathroom and walked back to your bedroom.

“You finished?” You asked Tara while returning to your previous seat beside her. 

“Yes but I have a proposition for you,” Tara responded almost immediately. You stopped your movements, eyeing her with a suspicious look. 

“Lay it on me,” you said.

“We can continue doing all this,” she gestured to her notes, “—but instead we can do it in a place with food.”

“I’m gonna need you to elaborate, please.”

“I want to go to the diner nearby, and finish studying there. I’m tired and starving—and you haven’t gone grocery shopping in weeks so I already know there’s not much to find in your fridge.”

“Wait, how do you know the last time I went shopping?”

Tara ignored your question, instead continuing to look at you with those doe eyes of hers as she continued to plead. “Pleeeaaase, Y/N?”

You looked at her, feigning a reluctant look before letting out a sigh. “Alright, let’s go.”

“Thank goodness. My stomach was starting to make noises I’ve never heard before,” she said as she was gathering her papers.

—

“Done!” Tara announced in a cheery tone. You looked up from your book as she slid over the sheet of loose leaf she was just working on. “I put a star next to number three; I was having trouble with that one the most,” she told you before sipping her half drunken milkshake. 

You nodded her way as your eyes skimmed her paper. “All these are correct—including number three. Was there a specific reason you didn’t fully understand it?”

“Mainly the order of the steps,” she answered.

“I see. Well you were correct. But if you continue to have trouble with the memorization stuff, flashcards are great memorization tools. Especially colored ones. I can lend you some of you want,” you offered her while giving her back the piece of paper.

“Oh—yeah. Totally,” she chuckled before loudly clearing her throat and practically shoving the straw in her milkshake into her mouth. There was something that washed over her—possibly embarrassment? You couldn’t be too sure. But why would she be embarrassed? Sometimes you wish you could hear her thoughts, just so you could get some insight on what was going through her head during certain moments.

Tara stared down at her straw, subconsciously refusing to pick up her head until she felt less flushed. That was so embarrassing, she kept thinking to herself. ToTalLy! Goodness, Tara, she just offered you some flash cards—not her hand in marriage. Her cheeks got even warmer at the idea.

“You good, Tar?” You just had to ask with that painfully soft voice you get when you’re concerned. Oh, and why did you have to call her Tar? She still remembers when you called her Tar for the first time—you were hiding away from everyone in her bedroom when she found you. She felt her knees physically grow weak as heat rushed to her ears, and now she’s found herself in that same predicament due to you opening your stupid, occasionally sweet, mouth. 

“Hm? Great!”

“Um,” you let out a short, awkward, and airy laugh. “Okay, good, yeah.” Your eyes subconsciously took a quick scan around the diner due to Tara’s sudden volume change. “So anyways, from the looks of those problems, you’re gonna nail your exam. Just try not to overthink your answers too much.”

Tara hummed before returning to her milkshake just to realize she was all out. Guess she’s going to have to find another thing to distract her eyes from you.

You, on the other hand, were still confused. Did you say something? Why did she seem so timid all of a sudden? Did the flashcards somehow cross a line? If so, in what way did it? Tara was being a little too silent for your liking, which is really saying something considering how much you value your quiet time. 

You were about to do one of the hardest things you have ever done. Attempt small talk.

You cleared your throat, “So. How’s—how are you and uh Chad?” This finally got Tara to look up. She eyed you with a confused expression. “Like, dating and stuff,” you awkwardly added. Your palms were already growing sweaty as your leg began to bounce. 

“Me and Chad? Dating?” That’s when she bursted out laughing, handing over her mouth and everything. You suddenly felt like a total dumbass but you weren’t sure as to why. Were they no longer dating? Well obviously, if you had to take anything from her reaction. But you weren’t doing a lot of laughing when you and your ex-girlfriend broke up.

“Oh—I’m sorry, let me catch my breath for a second.” She literally wiped away a tear from how hard she was laughing before speaking up again. “Y/N, Me and Chad are not together.”

“You’re not?”

“Nope. And we never will be, never ever ever.”

“Never ever?” 

“Never ever.”

You couldn’t help the sudden wave of relief that washed over you, but you weren’t sure where it came from.

“But I saw you two kissing at a party,” you told her.

“Right …that. Yeah, I try not to think about that night if I’m being honest. It was honestly super embarrassing; I was completely drunk, so drunk to the point where I thought he was… someone else,” her voice grew a little quieter towards the end as she sank a little in her booth.

“Oh.” Was all you said. You didn’t know what else to say. What could you? That night was a misunderstanding, and judging by Tara’s words and reaction to the accusation of her and Chad dating—that relationship is long from happening. Yet another feeling of relief washed over you as you had that thought. 

“Yeah,” Tara shrugged. That’s when something clicked in her head …she could use this awkward discussion to her advantage. “Since we’re on the topic of dating, how are you and Charlotte? You haven’t mentioned her in a while.” And good riddance for that, she silently thought to herself. 

“I kinda ended that,” you nonchalantly answered before shoving a fry in your mouth. 

“Oh that sucks,” she feigned a sympathetic tone. “It seemed like you two were really hitting it off.”

“I guess.”

Tara wanted to leave it that, really she did, but she just couldn’t help but pry. “Something happened?” She asked you.

“Nope. Just fizzled, I guess. situation-ships do that sometimes, not surprising.”

“Wait, ‘situation-ship’? What do you mean by that?” Her question and her tone of interest had you looking at her with raised eyebrows, utterly confused for what felt like the millionth time that night.

“Like, it wasn’t serious. I wouldn't call her my girlfriend, doubt she’d call me hers. Nothing more than a casual relationship,” you responded, for some reason you felt the need to tread lightly.

“Didn’t you go on like five dates? If you go on multiple dates, that means you’re dating. Thus the word dating being an extension to date,” she sternly replied. 

“Alright, I understand the responsibility of a verb—why are you getting upset over this?”

“I’m not upset.” The pout she wore as she defensively crossed her arms with slumped shoulders told you otherwise. “I just—I don’t know. I want pie.”

“Okay. I’ll get you pie, but could we please switch to a different subject?”

“Fine,” she mumbled; her gaze may have been directed toward her napkin, but it threatened to meet you every second. 

—

“I can’t believe you finally watched it!” You exclaimed to Tara. The both of you were headed back to your apartment; it was dark out as it lightly snowed. You were holding the bag of leftovers, walking on the street-side of the sidewalk as Tara kept her hands firmly placed in her jacket pockets, protecting them from what felt like sub-zero temperature.

“I only avoided it for so long because of you!” She laughed.

“Wow, so you’ve been missing out on one of the greatest shows of all time due to pettiness?”

“Okay, okay—I said it was good, not great.”

“Ah, but you wanna say great. It’s that darn pettiness holding you back, once again,” you said as your smile never broke.

“Did you just say ‘darn’?”

“Yeah, what?” 

Tara only laughed as she shook her head. “Nothing.”

“Oh! You should watch the extended cut—if you thought it was funny before, you're gonna love the superfan episodes.”

“I’ll give them a shot,” she truthfully responded. She would say anything to keep you talking like this. One of the things she loved listening to was you geeking out over something you were passionate about. Maybe it was the sound of your voice, maybe it was how you lit up, maybe it was how animated you were while talking. 

“Definitely do—” You were cut off by a body colliding into you, causing you to drop the bag of leftovers you were carrying. You muttered a “sorry” before crouching down to pick it up. Tara was about to help until your eyes met with the other person’s.

“Y/N?” The stranger asked.

“Olivia?” You mirrored a confused look.

What was your highschool sweetheart from Woodsborro doing in the middle of Manhattan?

“Oh my gosh—it really is you.” Olivia laughed a bit as the realization set in. You couldn’t help but laugh a bit too. 

“Yeah—yeah, and it’s you.” You responded before she came in for a hug. Your movement stuttered for a second before welcoming her hug. She was still as warm as the day you met, her dark hair still holding its shine it did since the last time you saw her.

The hug was understandably awkward, but for once you didn’t mind awkward. “What are you doin’ in New York?” You finally asked her. 

“I’m here for this documentary thing I’m working on,” she said.

“That’s right—your documentaries. I’m glad you’re still at those,” you told her in a genuine tone.

She grew a smile at the words you spoke. “Thanks… that means a lot.”

“Oh—uh, you remember Tara, right?” You turned and briefly pointed at the Carpenter who slightly waved.

“Yeah, I do. Hey,” Olivia said with no bitterness. She took a few steps and held out her hand to Tara, which the other girl took.

“Hey,” Tara nodded with a tight lipped smile.

“I’m surprised you two are out in public together,” Olivia joked. You and Tara both laughed awkwardly at your dynamic being brought up.

“Me too,” you joked back. “So uh—you staying long?” You asked, purposely deflecting to a different topic.

“It’s currently indefinite, I’m crashing at a friend’s place right now.” There was a glint in your eye that Olivia picked up. “Would you like to grab coffee sometime? I’d love to catch up.”

“Yeah, that sounds cool,” you replied; you were trying your best to hide your eagerness. 

“Awesome,” she grinned at you. “So, see you around?”

“See you around,” you said. You instantly began to cringe at yourself as she started walking away, but she didn’t leave without giving you one last look. As soon as she left ear shot, you let out a long awaited sigh.

“Geez.” The sound of Tara’s voice caused you to flinch, you completely forgot she was standing right there. “That was hard to watch,” she remarked.

“No one asked,” you said with an eye roll as the two of you began to walk again. 

“Someone’s bitter,” she replied. “Hey—” She put the back of her hand on your chest to stop you from walking as she turned to look at you, “Let’s go to my place instead.”

“Why?”

“I wanna finish these leftovers on the roof,” she answered.

“My apartment has a roof,” you told her.

“Not the same.”

“How is it not the same?”

“It's just not. Now come on before our food gets even colder and more destroyed.”

“I guess I’m following you,” you mumbled while trailing behind Tara.

—

You and Tara were sitting on white patio chairs; the same ones you recall from the last few times you’ve been up on the roof. The wind had calmed down since your walkover, snow still lightly falling from the sky. You were eating your fries as Tara was eating what was left of her pie. 

“I’m just saying, I could totally take down a bear.”

“Not in a million years, Tara. You, a 5 foot gremlin, versus a big furry thing with claws that could rip you to shreds? Be serious,” you deadpanned.

“First of all, I’m 5 foot 1, second of all, you’re really underestimating me here. If I can take down a sociopath while crippled—”

Tara didn’t talk about Woodsboro a whole lot, really the only time she’s talked about it—with you at least—was the night it happened, the party at Henry’s house, and just now if that even counted. She never seemed to name-drop anyone connected to that night. But you understood. You don’t remember the last time you said Dewey’s name out loud. 

“A sociopath? Yes. But last I checked, the said sociopath didn’t have the same physical traits as a bear—therefore, your argument holds no power.” You shoved a few fries in your mouth before silently offering her some, in which she accepted.

You glanced over at her to see her expression—she looked kind of disappointed. You sighed, thinking for a moment, before speaking again. “Okay, I’m not saying you have no chance. You’d still do some damage—and I guess it’s not impossible to beat a bear.” You hated the instant flip in your stomach from seeing the way she lit up, it was subtle but you’re grateful you noticed.

She smiled, almost grinning but she resisted. “That’s what I’m saying!”

“Jump on its back, put it in a headlock,” you added with your own little smile.

“Exactly. You get me,” she absentmindedly said right before taking another bite of her pie.

“What a mad world we live in,” you joked while reaching beside your chair for your milkshake. Tara wasn’t sure what you meant by that, but she just decided to ignore it rather than dwell on it—at least for the moment. She looked over to see you sipping your milkshake and a sly smile appeared on her face as she began to lean closer to you, her elbows resting on her chair’s armrest and expression never faltering.

“You want something, Tar?” 

“That’s an awfully tasty looking milkshake you have there,” she commented; she feigned an innocent tone.

You glanced at her from your peripheral vision—she was on your left side—as you played with the straw in your milkshake. “Tara…” You all but sang. She hummed in response, her position still the same. “Would you like my milkshake?” You asked, but your tone hinted that you already knew what her answer was going to be.

“Well, I guess since you’re offering. Who would I be to pass up a perfectly good milkshake?”

“You’re a piece of work,” you remarked with a broad smile that Tara could describe as gleaming. 

“You’re the sucker who gave me her milkshake,” she sneered before taking a sip from said milkshake.

“I’d watch my tone if I were you, ‘cause this sucker could easily take it back,” you threatened, lightly laughing along with the other girl. 

She scoffed and waved her free hand, “Yeah right. I’d like to see you try.” 

“Oh, yeah?” You get up from your chair, eyes never leaving Tara. “I bet I could take it back from you, no sweat.” 

A smirk grew on Tara’s face as she also got up from her chair. “Okay, okay, you’re on then. Winner takes all—all being the milkshake.” 

“You got yourself a deal.”

“Okay then let’s do this, come on bring it,” Tara’s grin was just too strong to fight off as she lifted up her elbows; one, to use as a shield for her milkshake, and two, to use as her weapon. 

You let out a laugh when you saw a defense mechanism. “That’s pathetic,” you quipped.

“Oh, really?” She said with raised eyebrows. She then shoved her elbows towards you, both of you laughing during all this. 

“Oh!” You took that as a chance to grab her from behind and wrap your arms around her waist, holding her in place as she attempted to break loose; in her defense, it wasn’t as easy to do so while she was flushed against you, her face heating up from both the action and her ceaseless laughter. 

The milkshake dropped to the floor, but neither of you paid any mind. You lifted her up a bit as you spoke, “Not much of a fighter now, huh?” You quipped in a smug tone. 

“You are so playing dirty right now!” She said; her shirt rose a little bit and her hands were loosely holding onto your forearms.

“I don’t remember seeing a rule book. Just surrender and I’ll put you down,” you told her as if it was the simplest thing ever; for anyone else, it would have been.

“No way!” At her response you lifted her higher at which she started rapidly patting arm. 

“You finally surrender?”

“Never in a bazillion years!” Just as Tara said that, she felt a drop of water on her forehead. She furrowed her eyebrows, glancing up at the night sky. “Shit—I think it’s raining.”

“Yeah right, you just don’t wanna be the one to surrender,” you accused while adjusting your hold on Tara.

“I actually felt—” Before Tara could finish her sentence, a loud grumble could be heard as it started to abruptly pour. “I told you!”

“Shit,” you cursed as you put Tara down.

“We need to get inside.”

“Incredible observation. Thought of being a detective?” You quipped.

“Shut up. It’s freezing, let’s just get inside.” Tara was visibly shivering, wrapping her arms around each other while hugging them close to her torso. 

“Okay, come on.” 

Tara barely let you finish speaking as she started rushing towards the door. “Wait—! Tara, don't run! You could slip!” You tried to match her speed without breaking your neck in the process. You nearly sighed in relief when she slowed down. 

She looked at you with an inpatient look as she waited for you to catch up. You were in the process of taking off your jacket as you caught up to her. “If you’re going to slow me down, at least walk a little faster. I’m getting drenched, and this outfit isn’t exactly water resistant—I’m not water resistant!”

“Geez, alright. Quit complaining.” You caught up to her, trailing behind her as you wrapped your jacket around her. “Stop looking at me funny, just open the door,” you said in response to the lost expression she gave you.

She mumbled something incoherent while reaching for the door’s handle and turning. 

As soon as you stepped inside, you let out a long exhale while rubbing your hands together. You looked beside you to see Tara attempting to shake off the water she was drenched in; of course, as a result, she ended up spraying you in the process. “Do you have to do that near me?”

“Where else am I doing it?” She tightened your jacket around her, holding it impossibly close to keep herself warm.

“Whatever, I gotta get home anyway. Picked up a few extra shifts,” you said while double checking your phone’s dryness.

“I thought the cafe gave you off on Saturdays.”

“Uh, yeah. I do. I’m—covering for a coworker, I owe them so,” you trailed off with a shrug; you batted your eyes away from Tara, suddenly finding your drenched jeans very interesting. “Well, I should get going. I’ll see you around?”

“Yeah, see you,” Tara responded; you made your way down the stairs but not before sparing a small smile.

—

It was the next day, 8:52 am on a Saturday. You had woken up around 4:00 since you had to get in around 7:00 to help set up and open at 8:00. Exhaustion was hitting you back and forth, the only thing that was keeping you awake, barely, was your few hours old coffee you had brought from home. Staying out late with Tara was really biting you in the ass, but you were usually tired these days so it wasn’t much of a difference.

Although it was slow since the day had just begun for many, you still found yourself dealing with incompetence so early in the morning. Truly, it was too early for this. If one more person asked about Halloween stuff, Thanksgiving stuff—any other thing they should’ve gotten months prior, you are going to bash your head into a wall.

Why are people asking their barista about stupid out of season decorations? It’s simple, the cafe wasn’t paying you enough; attending college and living off campus wasn’t getting any cheaper and you needed a reliable job. So when you saw that Target was hiring, you applied. That’s how you came to balance two jobs and some of the most insufferable customers you have ever had the displeasure of conversing with.

“I’m sorry miss, but we stopped selling that after October. But if you’d like, I can show you to the candy aisle—”

“No, listen to me, these are what I want,” she snarled while shoving her phone in your face; her phone showed a picture of the Halloween candy she wanted. “I don’t want regular sour patch, I don't want regular m&m’s, I don’t want regular reese’s pieces—I want Hal-lo-ween candy.” 

“I know that, but miss—”

“Can you just go check in the back? Please? My son has been driving me insane and I need to at least do this one thing right,” she begged.

You let out a silent sigh, “Of course. I’ll go check in the back to see if we have anything left.”

“See, now that wasn’t so hard,” she said as you made your way to the storage room. You rolled your eyes, choosing to ignore her statement. It really was too early for this.

You went into the storage and sat down on a nearby box; you just stared at the ceiling, zoning out for about a minute before heading back.

“I apologize, we don’t have what you're looking for. Is there anything else I can help with?”

She scoffed at you, clutching her purse as she did so. “No, I do not need your help because clearly it is no use. Your manager will be hearing from me,” she angrily said before strutting away.

“I’m sure he’ll love that,” you remark out loud to yourself. Once she’s out of your eye line, you let out an aggravated sigh. Working in retail is not for the weak.

You walked back to the end of the aisle and began to restock the shelves again, the thing you were previously doing before being interrupted. You picked up one of the boxes of cereal when your hand accidentally knocked something out of your pocket. It fell by your feet, you glanced at it for a moment before looking back at the shelf—but that’s when it registered what it was. You immediately placed down the box then kneeled down to pick up what you dropped. 

It was a folded piece of paper. You slightly furrowed your eyebrows as you unfolded it before you traded your confusion for a smile. You looked at the doodles that covered the paper, the doodles drawn by Tara. Her name was even signed at the corner; sometimes she draws her name in different fonts to pass the time. Over the years, you noticed her favorite font to draw is graffiti lettering. You were now standing up, still smiling down at the piece of paper. You always admired the way she wrote—

—Suddenly somebody clears their throat. You jumped, blinking rapidly while attempting to shove the paper back into your pocket. You turn your head around to see your co-worker, Avery, crossing her arms while giving you a look you couldn’t quite read. “Secret admirer?” She remarked with a smirk.

“No, it’s just—it’s nothing. Scraps, really if you could even call it that,” you stammered while trying to nonchalantly lean against the shelves. It wasn’t a total failure, you guess.  

“...Right,” she narrowed her eyes at her, clearly not believing your crappy save, but dropped it nevertheless. “Anyways, me, Vicky and a few of the others are gonna go out for a drink tonight; can I count you in?” 

You stopped leaning on the shelves as you thought for a moment. You usually weren’t one for going out, but it’s been a long few months. With that thought, everything that’s happened in the past year flashes through your mind. It’s been nothing but motion sickness, and maybe you could go for a drink or two. 

“You know what—yeah, I’m in,” you nodded at her before returning to the boxes of cereals that sat in the cart beside you. 

“Wait, really? You never wanna come to these things …damn it, I owe Vicky like 20 bucks,” Avery silently moped as she walked away. You laughed a bit at her comment as you continued stocking the shelves.

Maybe tonight wouldn’t be so bad.

—

When you got home that day, you made sure to take a nap before it was time to leave for the bar. When you got there, you stood at the doorway for a few seconds, honestly not sure what your next move was but luckily you caught Avery’s eye and she waved you over. You walked over to where she and the others sat at—the bar—you sat down on the stool beside Avery who was sat next to Vicky. You were surprised they weren’t sitting on the same stool with how tangled with each other they were.

“You made it!!” Avery shouted in a cheery voice that made you wince as she pumped her fists in the air. “Look, Vicky! Y/N’s here!”  Vicky nodded at the girl while trying to subtly ground her by rubbing her lower back.

She looked over at you with an apologetic look. “Sorry, she gets kinda loud and hyper when she’s drunk.”

You chuckled a little, giving her a reassuring shake with your head. “Don’t worry about it, I’m a pretty embarrassing drunk anyways so I couldn’t talk. Probably why I don’t do it much,” you told her while your arms rested on the table. 

“Gosh, I can’t wait to see you drunk,” she said while adjusting her arm as Avery was now resting her head on Vicky’s shoulder.

“That’s never gonna happen—just a club soda for me. At most I’ll do some watered down beer, but that’s really it,” you said. 

“Wow.”

“I know, I’m a party animal,” you quipped with sarcasm laced in your voice.

“Total rebel,” she added as you both laughed. “So, other than the fact that you’re a total bad boy—how are you liking New York?” She asked with Avery still wrapped around her who had snuggled up closer to her.

“It’s fine. Hasn’t changed much since the last time I lived here.”

“Yeah? Did you live in Manhattan before or someplace else?” 

“Brooklyn. I was born there, and lived there until …I didn’t,” you answered with your train of thought trailing off with your answer. So much has changed since you moved. What if you didn’t move? What if you never moved back? What if you lived in Woodsboro first? What if—

“—Did your family  move around a lot?” She asked another question out of pure curiosity.

“Uh…” You picked at the wood surface in front of you, suddenly feeling drained and exhausted. “ No. Just one time.” 

“Cool, my family moved around a few times. It’s a pretty hard thing to go through, even if it’s just once,” she said in an understanding tone. She looked back to Avery, smiling to herself as she stared admirably at the half-a-sleep girl nuzzled up against her. 

You glanced over at the adorable site before asking, “How long have you two been dating?”

“A couple months, but we’ve known each other for ten years,” she responded while pushing back loose strands of hair that covered Avery’s eyes.

“That’s a long time,” was all you could think to say. 

“Yeah, she’s literally my other half. I don’t know what I’d do without her.” After letting herself stare at Avery for another moment, Vicky turned her gaze back to you. “How about you—you seeing anyone?”

“Eh.”

“Eh?”

“I was uh, sort of seeing someone? But broke that off recently. Too close for comfort,” you elaborated for her while silently deciding if you should drink tonight.

“Your casual relationship get too intimate?” She raised an eyebrow before you responded with a tiny nod, she probably would have missed it if she blinked in the same moment. “Yeah, I used to be like that before Avery.” 

“Guess I just gotta wait for my Avery,” you half-joked, earning a laugh from Vicky. 

“I hope you do, she’s definitely a keeper,” she said fondly. She looked at you—your head now resting on your folded arms—and saw the distraught expression you wore, it looked as if you were silently having a debate with yourself. 

“Something up?”

You did a double-take at her, lifting up your head before sparing her a meek smile. “Just thinking, you know?”

Vicky nodded before adding on. “You need advice? I’ve always been told I give great advice.” Her voice was kind and held nothing but honesty.

“Sure…” You were hesitant to accept but you were also on the verge of digging yourself into a hole just to avoid decision making. To be fair, you often think about barricading yourself to avoid dealing with your problems—and oftentimes, you have actually done it. “So last night I bumped into my ex,” you reluctantly began, “and we briefly talked, and she mentioned meeting up sometime to catch up.”

“I’m assuming you’re nervous about the catching up part?” 

You confirmed with a hum.

“Are you nervous about being the first to reach out, the catching up part overall, or both?”

“Yes.”

She let out a tiny laugh, not unkindly, before telling you that advice she told you about not long ago. “This was all last night, right? I say, wait a couple more days, then reach out if you’re up to it, and then once you get that part out of the way the rest will build itself.”

“You really think so?”

“Promise, I really don’t think you should stress too much on this. And listen, if you’re really not ready to meet up with her yet, I think she’d understand. Either way, it’s your choice,” she told you before sipping her drink.

“That’s… really good advice. Thank you,” you complimented.

“You’re welcome, anytime. I did mention that I give great advice.”

“I said good, not great,” you said in a tone that hinted you were just teasing.

“Yeah, okay whatever.” Vicky playfully rolled her eyes as you smiled at your own taunting.

Maybe this was not as bad as you were making it out to be, maybe everything would be okay. Maybe, just maybe, things were finally starting to look up.

—

Things were awful. You could never have been so wrong in your life. It was one thing after another. First with the text; you had to just hope Olivia didn’t change her number as you looked for her contact—which you had to look for by number since your removed her name and photo right after your breakup out of pure pettiness—and it took you about half an hour to think of the right words to send, and as soon as you sent them you immediately regretted it.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

Next was when she actually responded. 

Y/N (4:42 pm) Hey, it’s Y/N. Catching up sounds cool, so if the offer still stands I’d love to take you up on it

(XXX) XXX-XXXX (4:56 pm) Hi, yeah offer still stands. I’m actually free tonight if that works? I know that’s short notice so I completely understand if you’re unable to

You were in the middle of revising your notes at the kitchen counter when you heard the ding from the couch. Your head immediately shot up, and as soon as it processed what that ding was—you ran to it, hopping over the back of the couch and grabbing your phone. 

You read the message over to yourself exactly seven times before impulsively reacting to her message with a thumbs up. After your response, you got another text from Olivia and the two of you made a decision of when and where to meet. 

Oh, how deeply you regretted your impulsiveness as you stared at the same outfit over and over again. That’s what came right after the communication part; what exactly you were going to wear. You felt ridiculous, you’re usually not like this—but that happens to be a reminder of all the different things Olivia brings out in you. Good and bad. It was like you were 17 again.

Eventually you decided on something comfortable, casual, it’s not like you were going someplace fancy. The air in your apartment suddenly grew to be suffocating the closer it got to the time you had to leave. You gathered your belongings; you gathered your wallet, keys, phone, headphones, and lighter, shoving a few of them into your pockets. Just before leaving you stood still for a second.

What could I be missing? There has to be something. There has to be something. Damn it, there has to be something! 

Your eyes wandered around your apartment for a good minute before you called it in. You patted yourself down while muttering the names of the items you felt in your pockets before finally leaving. You locked up behind you and let out a long sigh as you ran your hand down your face. 

When you got to the bakery, your heart was beating in your ears and you felt your ears warm up when you made eye contact with Olivia from just a few tables away. She waved at you and you waved back as you subtly gulped. On the way towards the table, you silently hoped she didn’t pick up on the urge you had to perish right then and there.

“Hey,” you said. You weren’t sure if you were supposed to hug her or shake her hand, something, so you just stuck with sending a small but simple smile her way.

“Hi,” she responded. She returned your smile as she looked you up and down. “You look good—I mean, you look yeah,” she awkwardly laughed, flustered from her stammering.

You returned a short laugh, feeling a tiny bit of the tension beginning to ease but not entirely, “You look good too,” your smile grew softer as you spoke. You noticed her eyes still wandering. “Didn’t get a good look last time?” You quipped in a teasing tone.

She shook her head as she tried to fight off the bright smile that painted her face. “I see you haven’t changed much,” she said.

“Well, me and change have never mixed well.”

“Oh trust me, I know,” she made her tone less monotone to ease the weight of her words. But that didn’t make you oblivious to their meaning.

You cleared your throat, adjusting your posture while you folded your hands and dropped them to your lap. “So, how’s the documentary going?”

“Just fine,” she said positively. “Still in the early stages, and you know how that can be.” You nodded along to her words.  It suddenly became awkwardly quiet. 

You picked at your cuticles, pressing harder and harder for that sweet sensation you craved, your gaze everywhere but at Olivia. That tension you felt before started to settle in your chest again, and you didn’t know how to cope. You just wanted out. You regretted agreeing to this. You wish you never bumped into her. You wish you never agreed to dinner with Tara because then this wouldn't be happening. 

Of course it goes back to Tara. It always seems to.

“You still do that thing with your fingers?” She asked out of the blue.

“Huh?” You furrowed your eyebrows, looking down at your lap to where your hands rested. 

“I don’t have to look to know. I've known you for three years, Y/N,” she said.

“Oh.”

“And I can hear you picking at them from under the table.”

You suddenly felt small, slumping in your chair, and continuing to avoid eye contact with the woman who sat across from you. However, Olivia did not return this treatment. She sat up in her chair, placing her own hands on the table before turning them over to expose her palms. “Let me see your hands.” 

“What?”

“Show. Me. Your. Hands.”

 It didn’t seem like she was asking. There was definitely not a question mark in there. You rolled your eyes, letting out a small sigh that held aggravation. Reluctantly, you complied with her commands. She took your hands in hers and began to examine them, her fingers tracing down and softly rubbing against yours—you forgot how soft her hands were. As soon as her hands made contact with yours, you felt your joints grow weak and your cheeks felt too warm. You don’t remember the last time you held hands with her but it was certainly having an affect on you.

“Have you been using these as a chew toy?” She rhetorically asked, referring to your fingers whilst still examining them.

“Okay, they’re not that bad.”

“Yes. Yes they are,” she said with no hesitation.

She finally stopped looking at your fingers and instead at you. When you saw the worried expression that painted her face, you knew a line of questioning was approaching. “Are you okay?” She inquired in an unbearably gentle voice.

“I’m fine.”

“Which means you’re not fine.”

“Putting words into my mouth, as always,” you said in a low tone as you pulled your hands away from her.

“You really want to go there?” She let out a short exasperated laugh with her question, raising her eyebrows as she spoke.

“When I say I’m fine—I’m fine,” you said while leaning in and emphasizing your words by pressing on the table with your index finger; you leaned back against your chair when you finished speaking.

“Oh my God. You are literally so unbelievable—do you even hear yourself?” She looked at you with pure disbelief which only confused you further.

“What are you even talking about? All I said is that when I say I’m fine, I mean those words. How am I wrong here? I genuinely don’t understand,” you expressed in both frustration and genuine confusion.

“And what I am trying to say is you’re still the exact same person I was arguing with right before we broke up.”

“What?”

“You never want to talk! Listen, baby, I get you’re grieving—but you can’t just shut me out like this. It’s apparent that you need help! You don’t have to rush into it, but eventually—”

“Whether I talk or not is my choice! And I’m not seeing some stupid grief counselor, okay? Just because I don’t wanna talk to you about certain things, doesn’t mean I’m shutting you out—and I don’t need help! I’m fine. I’m just—damn it, I’m just processing. Can’t you let me do that at least?”

“You have been ‘processing’ for months! It’s time to—”

“Time to what? Move one?”

“That’s not what I was going to say!”

“But you’re thinking it. You’re thinking it just like everyone else is; my mom, my brothers, everyone at school—just leave me alone, all right!”

“Y/N, nobody is—”

“No! Everyone is thinking! Just stop, okay! I don’t need your bullshit sweet nothings, I don’t need some therapist, I don't need to talk about it—I’m fine!”

You and her could not even go five minutes without your conversation, or lack of, forming into an argument. And it was your fault. You were the problem. You couldn’t answer a simple question. Maybe you were hiding behind the fact that you didn’t know how to answer that question, or that you're trying to hide the answer from others. Either way, you always find yourself forming emotional barricades around you, no one in and no one out. 

“Hey, come back,” Olivia’s voice rang. You were pulled from your thoughts, blinking rapidly as if it would wipe away the memories you tried so hard to erase. She leaned in, her irritated expression replaced with a comforting one. “I know how mean that voice in your head can be, I know what it does to you—but I just want you to be okay.”

You met her gaze, your expression equivalent to the look of a lost puppy. “Thank you, Olivia,” you simply said. It was not much, but it still weighed in emotion. 

 The rest of the night was less intense. She asked about Blackmore and how it’s going, which inevitably opened the door to her questioning you about seeing you with Tara the other night, and you found out more about her documentary. The night was long and tiring, but as much as you hate to admit it, you’re glad you agreed to catch up with Olivia. And you would be a bold faced liar if you said you didn’t miss her. The wound is still arguably fresh, but it’s beginning to heal. 

You walked into the apartment, looking forward to changing into a pair of pajamas and binge watching some TV on the couch until you passed out. You have been studying non-stop for exams for the past four weeks, so why not give yourself a treat? Plus, this upcoming school week, you will officially be exactly one week from exams so you will be locked in. What does that mean? You do what you usually do but multiply that by a million, anyone who has known you long enough knows they’re going to hear less and less from you the closer you get to exams. It’s as if you completely shut down from the outside—actually, that’s exactly what happens.

As you walked inside, you yawned and rubbed your tired eyes. But as they begin to focus again, you notice a few blobs sitting in your living room. When your eyes are fully focused, that’s when you see them.

“Are you shitting me,” you expressed in a monotone voice while turning the locks on the door before throwing your keys to the side.

“No—no whining!” Anika immediately said. “You knew they were coming over.”

“I thought you canceled,” you said.

“Uncanceled.”

“What a miracle,” you remarked as you took off your jacket.

“How come whenever I have people over you have a problem with it as if this isn't a shared apartment?” 

“Y/N being an inconsiderate jackass? What a revolation,” Tara pitched in with a smirk. You looked over to deadpan at her and she was already staring back at you.

“Says the woman who still owes me a milkshake,” you wiggled a finger at her. You both smiled at each other before you turned back around to kick off your shoes. “You know what, Nik, it’s fine. I’m just kind of grumpy right now.”

“It’s okay, I’m sorry for not giving you an update,” she said, matching your own apoplectic tone. “You wanna join us? We were gonna play some Uno then watch a movie.”

“Uh, I don’t know—”

“Yeah, probably 'cause you’re gonna get all embarrassed when I wipe the floor with your ass in Uno,” the younger Carpenter knowingly instigated.

“Oh, excuse me? I’ll have you know I’m the reigning champ in my family—don’t start something you can’t finish, princess,” you instigated back.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Alright,” your gaze stayed on Tara for a moment before switching back to Anika, “I’ll join you.”

—

“Tara is totally looking at my cards!” Chad shouted while shoving his cards to his chest like an elderly woman clutching her pearls.

“I am not! You’re the one who keeps leaning on my side!” Tara whined back with just as much passion, if not more.

“Okay—no one looks at anyone's cards!” Anika cut in. “Alright, babe, it’s your turn.”

Mindy wore a devious smirk, slowly picking a card from her deck for dramatic effect. 

“Boom, suck on that!” Everyone leaned in to look at the plus four Mindy slammed down on the pile of cards. Chad instantly groaned, immediately feeling a sense of regret for wasting his last plus four. He sulked while taking four more cards.

Now it was your turn. Tara was right after you, you had the chance to make her life a living hell. All you had to do was place the three plus four from your deck and you would double Tara’s deck in size and be one more card away from Uno.

You made a decision.

“Plus four,” you gloated regarding the single plus four you placed down.

“Damn it!” Tara made sure to glare at you while she picked up her four cards. “Just wait, you’ll see. I’m going to make my comeback.” 

“Whatever you say,” you said in a doubtful tone. As Tara silently cursed to herself while flipping through her deck in frustration, you couldn’t help but stare fondly at the girl. She always had a competitiveness to her that you couldn’t help but respect. It was kind of cute.

After another seven minutes, it came down to just two people; you and Tara. You sat from across each other, debating your next play while one taunted the other.

“You know you’re going down, right?”

Tara laughed at your words. “You have at least ten cards, I just have two more turns and I’ll be following through with wiping the floor with your ass.”

“Oh, yeah?” You said, unintentionally with a come hither voice. You leaned in, your voice lowering but the tone still the same as you spoke to her. “You keep that energy, Carpenter.”

Tara's face suddenly grew warm, her stomach enveloping with butterflies as your voice crashed against her ears. You leaned back against the couch, looking at your own cards as it was Tara’s turn now. 

Shit, you were in her head now. You totally did that on purpose, you had to. And what a dick you were for that, you knew what you were doing—again, you had to be aware of your actions. You must know the stupid feeling you give her, the way her stomach flips, how her legs turn to jello when you call for her. No. Focus. Come on, Tara. Lock in. Wipe the floor.

She cleared her throat, blinking down at her cards while processing them. It took a moment for it to click before she tapped back into her competitiveness and slammed down a card. “Uno! Plus four—suck on that!” Now she had just one card remaining in her hand, just one more turn and she would be victorious.

You smiled at her, your head tilted a bit as your eyes lit at the sign of her celebrating. She calmed herself down, feigning a calm demeanor. “Alright, it's your turn.”

You sighed. Well it was fun while it lasted, you enjoyed playing with Tara. It was entertaining. It’s nice playing with someone who can handle your competitiveness. “Uno, uno out,” you said while putting down your entire deck. You sat in your spot, looking at Tara with a shit-eating smirk with your hands folded together as Tara sat there dumbfounded.

“That’s—what, no, wait,” she furrowed her eyebrows as she rummaged through the cards you just placed. They were all green sevens. All of them. “How’d you—”

“Chin up, honey,” you teased, winking at her

“Oh you’re a real piece of work.” She shot up from her seat as she rushed over to a nearby closet. Your eyes followed her movements as you raised your eyebrows at her sudden actions. 

“You two finally finished?” Mindy asked but was ignored by the other girl. “What are you doing with that—can you like stop ignoring me?” Tara returned with a box of Jenga in her hand and the others trailing behind her. 

“I’m too tired to play Jenga,” Chad said.

“Good thing you’re not.” She now looked to address you, “You, me, Jenga—now.”

“Yes, ma’am,” was all you said as she immediately began setting everything up.

“What’s this about?” Anika asked you.

“Oh, I beat her ass in Uno—graciously so—and she’s being petty about it,” you shrugged.

“I am not being petty, I am unsatisfied. Seriously—how do you win with all green sevens?! Ugh, never mind that. We’re playing this and I’m going to hold out on my promise.”

“Of wiping the floor with my ass?”

“Exactly.”

“Woman of her word,” you say while getting comfortable in your spot.

Mindy, Anika, and Chad watched from the sidelines as you and Tara went at it in Jenga. There were many, many close calls, and few times where the other nearly flipped a table. You both tried to get into the other’s head while the other was sliding out their pieces, but so far no mistakes. But the tower was growing wobbly, it was getting late, and it was only a matter of time before that tower fell over. Now, it was simply a matter of who would make it come to that.

It was Tara’s turn, and there were not many places left for her to take from so she was forced to resort to an incredibly risky spot. You took this as another opportunity to mess with her. “Hey, Tar?”

“Kind of busy here,” she said—the block just halfway out. 

“Will you marry me?” You casually inquired.

Tara’s eyes widened and her eyebrows jumped in surprise. Her hand immediately faltered, dropping her piece as the tower came crashing down. Her mouth opened and closed, her stare averting back and forth from you and the fallen tower; she didn't even know where to begin. 

The others just remained on the sidelines, completely entertained by what was unfolding in front of them.

“Is that… a no?” Your eyes were almost pleading as you continued to taunt the girl, your millionth smirk that night threatened to show itself. 

“I’m going to kill you,” Tara responded as she squeezed her eyes shut, still processing what just happened.

“Not before the honeymoon,” you quipped. Chad, Mindy, and Anika could now be heard laughing, no longer able to hold it in.

“You can’t just—” She shut her mouth out of frustration, settling for narrowing her eyes at you.

“I can’t just what, sweetie? Come on, use your words.” Oh, this was fun. 

Suddenly you got a pillow to the face which only made it funnier, to you at least. “You owe me a rematch, cheater!” 

“Excuse me, I didn’t cheat. You messed up on your own devices,” you said while patting down the pillow and putting it to the side.

“You know what you did,” she said with bitterness laced in her voice. 

“I don’t, so how about you tell me? Tell me how exactly my words affected you; you know, so I can prevent myself from accidentally cheating next time.” You never broke eye contact with Tara; you enjoyed how much she was squirming thanks to you, maybe you enjoyed it a little too much.

“Next time?” 

“You wanna rematch, don’t you?”

“Yeah. I do.” This whole interaction had Tara blushing; she needed to leave, like right now. “How about I get back to you in 5-7 business days? Sounds good? Cool. Well, it’s late and Chad’s my ride so we should probably head home, right Chad?” Her words were rushed which made you raise an eyebrow at the sudden change. 

“Hm? Oh sure, I’ll just get my keys and stuff and we can go,” Chad said before going to get his belongings.

“So, I’ll see you around—buddy,” she awkwardly punched your arm in a playful manner.

“Um, yeah, buddy. See you around,” you chuckled at her awkwardness.

“I’m still expecting an answer though!” You called out as she made her way to the front door.

“5-7 business days!” She repeated back to you.

“I’m holding you to that!”

-----------

A/N: well that escalated, gosh, keep it in your pants R! 😦

Taglist: @t-wylia @lesbianpepsi @jennasfav @alyciaddict @justafoolinlove @steffido1993 @niqmandu @severelyuniquereview @darklron @ravenousinferno @smut-religiously777 @beautifulmongerbanditsalad @vanatalye @alexkolax@andsoigotabutterfly @ajortga

[dietmtdewbabynewyorkcity]

HOW I’VE BEEN SUCESSFULLY LOSING WEIGHT: Notes from a former binge eater ♥️

*this guide is to show how ~I~ do things and offer advice on how to do it MY way. I am in no way encouraging anyone to do themselves harm. First off,

HEALTH IS WEALTH.

That being said.. this is literally the longest I’ve ever gone without bingeing. It’s just,,, easy this time. Once you get a feel of what it’s like to be skinny you just don’t crave junk as much anymore bc you KNOW it’s not worth it. The trick is to eat clean 90% of the time and allow your favorite treats 10% do the time. Fit them into your calorie limit!!! Here’s some personal favorites that have helped me lose like 20lbs in the past 2 months.

I tend to do one higher- calorie drink during the day (protein shake, Starbucks, etc) and one healthy filling but low cal meal and a sweet snack at the end of the night.

LOW CALORIE 90%

Mediterranean salad (~150): mixed greens, chopped bell peppers, cherry tomatoes, red onion. Little bit of feta cheese. Balsamic vinegar (not dressing or vinegarette!!!!) I don’t add meat but you could totally add chicken for low cal high protein choice. You could also add olives but I don’t fw them.

Chocolate Protein shakes from the gas station (loll). They’re 220 cal on average and a great treat. Strawberry one is good too.

SEAWEED SNACKS they’re literally 30-60 calories for a pack and kill my urge to eat chips!!! Please give them a try!

Soups. Soups that are already portioned and have the calorie amount posted. I add extra seasonings and spice to boost metabolism.

Coffee!! With almond milk and a little coffee creamer. It’s worth the calories if you want a coffee just make one it’s better than going to Starbucks.

Sushi: I’m vegetarian so I get an avocado and cucumber roll. It’s so good with fresh ginger and a little soy sauce. Sometimes I will be craving it allllllll day and have it as my OMAD so rewarding 🥹

Miso soup>>>>>> add tofu and seaweed and onions!! And mushrooms if you like them.

Monster Ultra energy drinks,,,, yeah I know they’re bad for you but I love them.

Fruits!!! I especially love strawberries, watermelon, cherries, blackberries, pineapple and mangoes.

TREATS 10%

Trail mix: dried cherries, pecans, walnuts, pistachios, cashews. High in calories but perfect for killing hunger. High protein keeps you full and muscles strong, high healthy fats will keep your hair and skin and nails beautiful.

Chocolates: SMALL PORTIONS. if you can’t eat just eat a piece without bingeing, do NOT buy a big bag. what I do is I buy a bar of whatever chocolate I’m craving for my bf and we share it piece by piece. Dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white, hazelnut, with coffee beans, with toffee, fruits, chocolate is the best thing ever 🍫

Starbucks! My fav drinks are matcha lattes (hot/iced), iced white chocolate mocha, caramel macchiato, and occasionally a pumpkin spice latte. Peppermint mochas on the holidays. Oat milk always

Baked goods. Same deal as the chocolate, ONLY BUY THE PORTION YOURE GOING TO EAT. If you have been craving a croissant, go get one. One. Don’t buy a whole dozen of them. You will end up bingeing trust me. My favs are cinnamon rolls <3

Habits

I’m going to the gym!!! Consistently for the first time in my life. It doesn’t have to be anything crazy. Spend 30 min on the treadmill alternating between incline walking and easy paced jogging. Put on a YouTube video. Wear pink and bring a cute water bottle. You have to make an experience out of it! I stick to cardio and full body stretches plus ocasional (light) strength workouts w my bf.

I don’t drink anymore. Just 🍃. Alc is so high in sugar and carbs and it’s literally poison bro. I know it’s hard to stop but once you do you’ll feel so much better.

I rarely weigh myself. I’m at my bfs house all the time so I only step on my scale maybe 3 times a month. It’s been a game changer!!!

MINDSET

I practice mindfulness and speak kindly to myself. Basically sweetspo + affirmations to myself all the time.

Taking more pride in your appearance will also help motivate you. You think you’ll still want to binge after you took a full body shower, clean PJ’s or outfit, painted your nails, skincare and makeup done, whitened your teeth and lit a candle? No thanks.

Limit stupid, negative, useless media consumption. Watch things that have to do with your hobbies/ interests and your social media algorithms begin to kinda clean themselves up over time. My pages are all about exercise, study blogs, beauty tips and sciencey stuff. No more drama or celebrity nonsense. Cut down your following!!

Remember you only have one life on earth. You’re young and hot once. Don’t you want to grab this chance while you have it? Unfortunately your beauty is your currency especially as a woman, so if there’s anything I can do to give myself a better life I will. Losing just a few pounds of fat will make the craziest difference in ways you’d never expect. Free and discounted stuff. More people smile at you and listen to what you have to say. Both literal and figurative doors will be opened for you.Clothes fit better bc they’re more flattering when your body is fit and healthy. While it feels good to get validation from other people, the best part of it is looking in the mirror and feeling proud instead of ashamed. The inner confidence that comes from successful transformation………….there’s no other feeling that compares. If you know, you know. I’m just saying,, the choice is yours 🤷🏼‍♀️

[misc-obeyme]

You know the drill.

Spoilers for Lesson 40 below, including locked and hard lessons.

Just to clarify: when I say that it’s “the end” in my rantings, I am referring to season two, not the entire game. ☺️

Hmm.

I'm confused. And... underwhelmed? What even just happened?

I mean, we had lovely moments with the side characters and we got to kiss them all and of course I'm incredibly pleased I got to kiss Barbatos and Solomon, but aside from that we just... went back?

Most of the lesson was about the RAD founding ceremony. We say good bye to the side characters and they even address how we told Solomon his cooking was bad (more on this later).

But just as the ceremony is about to start, a dark rift opens in the sky. It's a rift in space and time. Barbatos straight up asks Solomon if he did it. Solomon says he didn't, but that he wasn't expecting it to show up so soon. (So who did create it? Nightbringer? And if so, doesn't this prove Solomon at the very least knows enough to know when Nightbringer is going to open a portal back through time??)

We miss the ceremony because we have to go through that rift if we wanna get back. The brothers come with us because we need their power. Just like when we summoned the white dragon, we call upon each brother for his power. Then Solomon adds his. Then there's a bright light and..

...roll credits.

Yeah. That's it. That's the end.

There's a locked lesson where Diavolo gives a speech at the ceremony.

And then the HARD lesson... is us returning to the House of Lamentation in our time. The brothers are all like oh hey MC good morning like nothing even happened. They say it's weird because it feels like it's been a long time since they've seen MC but that can't be right because it hasn't been that long at all.

AND THAT'S IT.

No Nightbringer. No further insight from Solomon or Barbatos. Not even sad angsty brothers who have been missing us.

It was like they didn't know we were gone.

So either we went back a little further in time or there was never a point where they decided as a group to send Solomon back to help us.

We didn't even get a Michael appearance!

THAT WAS VERY ANTICLIMACTIC.

I am confused because it wasn't bad, it was kinda cheesy, there were some sweet lines and like I mentioned previously I got to kiss my malewives but WHAT THE JUNK.

I'm not suffering, more like I'm just left hanging???

My one consolation is that we're back in our timeline now. So maybe NEXT SEASON we can FINALLY get some ANSWERS.

I really thought they couldn't drag it out any further and yet...

I didn't take a whole lot of screenshots this time because again, it was kinda just... underwhelming. Overall this lesson was just me going that's it?! And being baffled.

First I'd like to present you with these lovely Barbatos moments.

As sweet as this is, the man knows. Not that I ever thought anything else, but he's so subtle about it. I'm onto you, Barb.

My HEART. If I wasn't going back to another version of him, I would just be like nope staying by your side forever the end I don't care about anybody else.

But before all that, there was also this:

I'm glaring at you because you let Solomon into the kitchen.

I DIDN'T WANT TO.

OF COURSE I DIDN'T.

GOOD. SOMEONE ELSE CAN SUFFER WITH ME.

OHHhhhh Barb I love when you get all threatening and smile like that 💕

But seriously, then Barbatos and Luke help Solomon make a lunch that's actually delicious and we eat it with everybody and they're all amazed. I was like OKAY WELL I do feel a bit better about that whole fiasco now. But still, was it even necessary to begin with? No amount of sweet kitchen buffoonery with these guys is going to make me forget the pain.

At least we had a cute Solomon moment, too.

Yeah but I'm still wondering about the past version of you, Sol. I'm just saying, where is that guy?

I mean you don't have to look so sad about it.

Ah. Your jealousy is showing, Solomon. (I don't mind.)

Hard Lesson bits because I'm still just ????

YEAH BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T.

YEAH IT'S BEEN TWO WHOLE SEASONS.

Once again, I am left with more questions than what I started with. Will MC tell the brothers what happened? Will we just never see the past brothers again? Will we return to the past in the next season? Will we ever see Nightbringer again, the being for whom this game was named?

At the very least, we still have Mephisto being himself and man I can't believe I ever disliked this guy.

THAT'S MY BOY.

I'm feeling extremely unsatisfied but it isn't like that's anything new.

I will say that it wasn't as bad as I expected. I was expecting them to do some really terrible things that made me freak out and scream and scare my cat. But no, I was mostly just ?? the whole time. And confusion is preferable to suffering in this case.

But I am also ANNOYED. We have waited long enough for the Nightbringer reveal, please give it to us now Solmare!!!

I fear we only have a short time before we are dragged further into this game that has truly become a hell of its own when season three is upon us... (I'm being deliberately melodramatic but still...)

[somehow-a-human]

Moonlight Serenade & Good Omens &... the TV show Lost...?

DO NOT ASK NEIL ABOUT FAN THEORY.

The music of Good Omens is something I have been ACTIVELY avoiding turning my focus on. The risks of hyperfixating and spiraling into it are HIGH. There are so many elements to get lost in, repeating motifs like Dies Irae, tolling bells, character themes... but I digress.

Could I hold out forever? no. and something finally pushed me over the edge. Wait for it..... Lost. Yep. The TV show Lost. WAIT WAIT, don't leave! STAY WITH ME! I promise I don't *think* I'm crazy and I have a point here!

Why Lost? And what does it have to do with Moonlight Serenade and WHAT DOES IT HAVE TO DO WITH GOOD OMENS?! Well my lovelies continue under the cut with me and keep an open mind...

Okay so... Lost. Yes, the insane 2004 mystery plane crash island adventure drama. It's a wild ride, and a masterpiece and a little bit crazy, but overall pretty damn good. I've been on a rewatch spree and wouldn't you know it... parallels between lost and Good Omens popped up in my brain! I mean they are both intricate mysteries so it makes a tad bit of sense but there was one little detail that *might* be a *clue*, or just an easter egg if anything. I promise you don't need to know anything about Lost to follow this :)

First off, what are some of the recurring themes that Lost the TV show and Good Omens have in common you might ask?

Life & Death

Alternate timelines & Time Travel

Literary Allusions (Catch-22, The Bible, A Tale of Two Cities)

Prophecies & Premonitions

Symbolism of Black & White/ Light & Dark

Yeah okay that tracks, but look there are 121 episodes of Lost and 12 episodes (so far) of Good Omens so there's bound to be some overlap for these two.

You'll be thinking about now, "BUT WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH MOONLIGHT SERENADE?!" I'm getting there, shhh, lemme pet your hair gently and keep giving you background information to build it up shhhh...

If you've never seen Lost there is a very good chance you're mighty confused at this moment, so let me reassure you, you don't need to know anything about it to understand the connections I'm going to make. A brief synopsis is: Oceanic flight 815 crashes on an island. The plane crash survivors quickly discover the island is more than it seems to be and holds many secrets and mysteries. A lot of people die, most of them are murdered, it's giving Lord of the Flies if it was in the horror genre. That's honestly all you need to know.

Time Travel & Alternate Timelines

Time travel is cannon in Lost. It's super confusing and I'm not even going to try to explain any of it here. It's honestly just not worth it. If you'd like to try and read about it, the abridged version is here, but I don't think the details are important. Just know it's real and confirmed and exists.

Okay so, *SPOILERS FOR LOST WILL FOLLOW* In Lost season 2, episode 13 "The Long Con" two of the plane crash survivors are trying to find a signal on a radio they've found. While scrubbing they come across a signal playing Moonlight Serenade by Glenn Miller. One character mentions it must be from somewhere nearby, but the other counters that this type of radio can pick up signals from anywhere in the world. There is a beat and then another character jokingly adds "Or any time. Just kidding, dude."

It's later confirmed that the Lost characters in 2004 are indeed picking up a radio signal from 1940 that is playing Moonlight Serenade, a product of time travel.

Congratulations, you've made it to the point where I'm going to bring Good Omens into the mix. In season 2, episode 4 "The Hitchhiker" we open seeing Aziraphale driving back from Edinburgh late at night/early morning. Uncomfortable with the darkness and silence he asks the Bentley to "play something that's got a bit of swing? I'm in the mood for something modern."

The Bentley obliges the angel, as she always will, and we are shown a shot of the radio specifically lighting up, so we know she's tapped into the radio to play this for Azi, but there is no channel selected.

Compared to Season 2, Episode 3 "I Know Where I'm Going" when we see the radio is playing and does display the channel.

But hold on. Okay maybe it just isn't showing the channel, that's fine, but Aziraphale asked for "modern"? Moonlight Serenade is most certainly not modern. It was recorded in 1939! I'd say in 2023 it's anything but modern, maybe not in Aziraphale's long lived opinion, but certainly in the Bentley's opinion, given she's only a 97 year old car.

I think you can see now what I'm saying here. I think the Bentley picked up a radio signal from 1940, maybe 1941? Episode 4 is of course our 1941 blitz magic show bullet catch flashback extravaganza, so... it makes sense. I know we like to headcanon Crowley and Aziraphale listened to A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square in the bookshop in 1941 after the bullet catch, but what if they listened to Moonlight Serenade on the radio instead?

What does it mean?

A reference to this small moment from Lost could be a nod to the first hint of the canonization of time travel in that series. We know Crowley can control time to some extent and we can see some evidence of time discontinuities and possibly time weirdness in season 2 so is it a hint that timeline funkiness IS happening? Do I want to get into the fact that the main character in The Hitchhiker, the Twilight Zone episode this episode is named after, is actually dead? No I don't, not now anyway.

Or it's just an absolutely lovely little Lost easter egg.

SO! There it is... weird little connection that I couldn't get out of my brain. It just seemed a bit too... ineffable.

As always this is all for fun and all for fans! Don't ask Neil about these things, they're for us to have fun with. And something else that I don't think some people on here understand about meta-analysis; the goal of it is not necessarily to be correct. It can be, if that's your thing. Refuting peoples posts, theories, analysis, and headcanons because you personally don't agree with them and telling them they're wrong and stupid doesn't achieve anything. Meta-analysis is an exercise in critical thinking and creative writing. You could write meta about how Spongebob is a critique of the loss of christian values in modern society and you wouldn't be right or wrong, you'd just certainly be a person who wrote that for sure though. Just, be kind to each other, share ideas, you're allowed to disagree with someone's ideas or have different ones of your own but don't be cruel in saying so, don't call someone stupid, that's just silly.

Love you all, do something kind for yourself today <3

ps. The moment I see Michael Sheen with blonde hair come January I'm gonna bark like a dog, that's all. Thanks.

[narrators-journal]

For the Lovecraft ask can we add breeding kink and squirting and maybe size kink and belly bulge

Also maybe reader is his wife and she’s turned on by him

I just kinda went wild with your prompt ngl. Lovecraft is still reader’s husband, and she’s still turned on by him! But I wrote this less as a bsd-exclusive kinktober-style fic, and leaned into the monsterfucking aspect to just GO HAM on the tentacles and monster angle. So yes, this is Lovecraft x reader, but it’s also kinda able to be read as a general monster smut. Which, was fun to write! Sorry if I went a bit light on some things, or it’s not quite to your liking on the details, this is sort of my toe back in the water after kinktober.

Thankfully it’s not as bad as last year, but ya still gotta give yourself some leniency after a challenge, y’know?

CW: teratophilia, sacrificing, tentacles, possible oviposition? U can kinda ignore that tbh, but it’s there. Breeding kink is lightly impied, size difference is also implied, squirting

It was an ancient, possibly outdated tradition, to sacrifice women to a god in exchange for a good harvest. Yet, ever since you could remember, each spring had been marked by the offering of a fertile woman to the god of the sea your town relied on. Normally, said woman was on the younger side, around eighteen to twenty for the best fertility chances, but your grandmother had always warned you that standards were likely to change. So, as you bathed and mentally prepared for whatever happened to the sacrificial brides of your god, you weren’t surprised at your position.

You weren’t a virgin, nor were you eighteen, or even twenty, in fact, you’d gotten married before you had been chosen to be this year’s sacrifice. Yet, there you were. Your hands being tied behind your back by your husband before you were walked down to the beach, nude, to await your new ‘husband’.

Like any other sacrifice to your town’s god, you had been tied to the edge of the dock. Your hands bound behind you, your foot tied firmly to one of the sturdy supports. So, all you could really do was sit on the rough wood of the water-warped platform and listen to the waves lazily lapping at the sand beneath the dark, star-speckled night sky.

However, it wasn’t more than two hours max before you first spotted an odd, slow movement in the water. Too slow for it to be some sort of person, but too big to be a fish. It’s okay, You told yourself as you watched the form approach and sink into the glittering soup before you, Brides don’t always turn up dead. It’ll probably be okay, no matter what happens.

With that, you took a deep breath to calm the knot of anxiety that formed in your chest. Yet,when you felt the cold, watery slime of a tentacle’s smooth skin against your own, you still jumped and attempted to scramble away. Yet, there was little you could do beyond scoot as far from the edge of the dock as your tether allowed. Not that your nerves did much to dissuade more green tentacles from rising out of the water to snake around your ankles and wrists, or around your waist to trap you in place. To hold you hostage while more tentacles emerged from the cool sea water to explore your nude body. It was disgusting.

Yet, at the same time, it was thrilling.

Ever since you were little, you had heard tales and rumors about all of the many things that might happen to the ‘brides’ your town offered to the sea god in exchange for the plentiful fish, including the exact situation you now sat in. But, in those past years until your own eighteenth birthday had passed, some part of you had always feared the possibility of becoming the sea god’s bride.

However, when you’d passed eighteen and gotten married, that fear had gone dormant. But, it hadn’t left completely. After all, how could a woman ever put to rest the anxiety of being one bad flu season away from being chosen to risk being torn to shreds or split in half?

Only to find, that the slow slide of tentacles, and the gentle kisses of their suction cups against your nipples or the tender skin of your inner thigh didn’t disgust or scare you as much as you had expected. Instead, they excited you.

Even when a rather meaty tentacle slipped between your legs to prod at your dampening cunt, the pressure of it against your folds sent lightning through your blood, and the stretch of it pushing into you was enough to wipe away the fears and earn a lewd noise. And while yes, you weren’t a virgin, as hardships had left sacrificial options too slim to offer an eighteen-year-old woman and ensure something like that, there was simply something far more exciting than your human husband could achieve.

Yet, that didn’t keep the tentacle from settling deep within you, creating a bit of a bulge in your belly while your muscles twitched and stretched to accommodate the growing girth of the appendage within you. Nor, did it stop the tentacle when it began to move.

In. Out. In. Out. The tentacle’s movements within you were slow. Curious, almost. The odd, slick appendage somehow able to brush against and find each of your sweet spots as it pushed deeper into you to explore every inch of your gummy walls. And, while the monster you had been sacrificed to didn’t seem interested in your pleasure, the tentacle’s slow, thorough thrusts and flexes still managed to draw lewd moans out into the warm night’s air. Oh god, why does this feel so good? You managed to think while your back arched off of the rough wood of the dock you laid on into the inquisitive caress and attention of the tentacles that still squeezed and toyed with your breasts. Feeding the fire in your veins that you tried to ignore, even as the more primal, needy part of you begged, More. More! I feel too good. I need more! In a shameful plea for that pleasure to continue to be indulged.

And, as if the god had read those deep, lust-addled thoughts, the tentacles that snaked around your breasts and toyed with your nipples squeezed your mounds and the thicker tendril that stretched your cunt so deliciously flexed against that special spot within you. Pulling another, louder cry of desire from your throat with the force of the lightning it sent hurdling through you. Yet, even as your blood screamed with need, and the chill of the water-cooled tentacles that held your wrists and legs down were the only things keeping your small body from combusting, your new husband kept going. “Hah! W-wait! Hold on!”You begged into the spring night’s air, able to feel the tell-tale tightening of your muscles with each brush of that thick tendril against your g-spot. “I-I’m gonna- ngh!- going to c-cum! I’m gonna cum!” You screamed, no longer scared of your fellow townsfolk hearing your blissful calls over the waves when your euphoria crashed down upon you with such force that your juices squirted out slightly.

Though, your pleasure didn’t end with the deviant pleasure. You merely got a brief break from the friction, as the tentacle that sat buried in you stilled to let you stare up into the colorful night sky and catch your breath. And, for a second, you thought your monster husband had somehow sensed that you had orgasmed and was going to stop or at least pause their movements. However, the tentacle only paused for a moment, before you felt the already thick girth of the tendril move more within you.

Not to continue fucking into your twitching entrance, though, but to push something into you. The...egg? Capable of being felt as it slid down the length of the tentacle to settle into your womb. Followed quickly by more and more masses being pumped into your belly to the point that your belly began to look bloated. Not that you minded, though. You simply laid on the dock, listening to the waves lap against the supports beneath you while the tentacles kept hold of your limbs until your monstrous husband was satisfied with how plump your belly had gotten. Only then, did those strong tendrils finally release you to lay on the dock beneath the stars. Exhausted, slimy, and bred.

[eggrollofchaos01]

Okay I wanna talk about something. I know we all talk about how Wylan seems to help Jesper like seem healthier and not as weighed down but what about how Jesper helped Wylan (also I am using the deleted scene pics which adds some glow but I see extra glow I swear)

Season 1 Jesper through most of the season seemed sleep deprived and like completely over taken with just the crows and the next big hit

Season 2 after meeting Wylan we see his eye bags are gone and he just seems healthier which could be from him using his powers more than he used to. And that like fear and constant throwing himself into his addictions is not gone but lessened and yes he’s glowing cause of the lighting but he also has that glow of like happiness

Now we get into Wylan which I don’t seem many people talking about. I actually have three for him

Beginning of season 2. Tie a mess, shirt a mess, definitely hasn’t eaten in a few days like Kaz mentioned and clearly has been barely surviving. He’s desperate for any sorta of pay that he’s willing to betray his morals because he has no other choice. And also not confident or clean, also sleep deprived and getting mugged for what little he has

Middle of season 2. He seems to be eating at least more regularly, he’s bathing more and looks more well rested. And what he’s wearing, it has a brighter color versus the dark shirts we’ve seen him wearing before and it’s definitely a little big on him (I say clothing thief Wylan), also he’s standing a bit more confidently

End of season 2. Confidence GALORE, look at the shine in his eyes and the proud head tilted up, he has become more confident in himself and his abilities. He’s for sure sleeping more, and just happier (he always seems a little solemn in the past scenes with no shine, the shine started with Jesper) honestly they both were attached at the hip after episode 6, so they’ve been just in each others company getting happier and happier, he also for sure has Jespers shirt on

In conclusion your honor, these boys have made each other healthier with just their presence and support and trust. It is so important that people see what a good healthy uplifting relationship in media in different forms. They’re criminals and killers yes but they also care for each other and deserve to be happy.

[moonshynecybin]

you’ve talked about Laguna Secq being iconic but what about Valentino’s reaction to the first time Marc pulls one of his moves (Jerez, 3rd race of the season)

okay this was initially supposed to be BIGGER and include ASSEN 2015 and JEREZ 2013 but the beautiful sirens call of laguna seca 2013 is the only one i got to before i ran out of steam… small teeny weeny (1.5k) fic about marc using vale’s moves pun INTENDEDDDDD:

“You keep using my moves.” Vale says, coming up behind Marc on the balcony. His breath hits the back of Marc’s neck as he leans against the railing. Close.

They’re alone, shoulders brushing, outside the party— and Vale sounds happy, which Marc thinks is a good sign. He shrugs.

“I told you— I’ll pay the copyright.” Thumbing some hair behind his ear as Vale settles next to him, he lets a smile stretch over his face. They’re away from the party out here, alone, and Vale’s been— Vale’s been amazing, these last few months, as Marc’s rookie season has taken shape. The best, really. Exactly like Marc thought he’d be.

The lines of Vale’s body are impermeable— trending almost impressionistic in the dark— bright patches peaking through the window and painting streaks of light on his skin. He’s smoking as he talks, cigarette flaring orange in the dim light as he takes a drag, cheeks hollowing, and normally Marc can’t stand the smell of cigarette smoke, but right now it’s just good. Smells sexy. Adult.

“Ah, well that makes it okay, then.” His palm lands on Marc’s shoulder, shaking him around, a nod to the play-choking earlier in parc ferme. Just like then, Marc lets himself be moved, a laugh exploding out of him as Vale manhandles him. His fingers curve, covering Marc’s shoulder entirely, warm and heavy. He loves this, loves the way it feels— Vale putting him where he wants him, bringing him on the inside of a joke only the two of them get to enjoy.

“They’re good moves.” He protests, breathless when Vale lets him go. His narrow shoulder stays close, and Marc doesn’t think he’s stopped smiling once since the checkered flag was waved, cheeks starting to hurt.

Vale’s playing.

“I know they’re good moves, I made them! I never expected I would have to say fuck!” All the emphasis on lands on fuck, accent liquifying the word into a short, sharp sound. Marc thrills, absorbing it. A whole party full of people and Vale came to him. “—they are being used on me!”

Marc laughs again, tilting his head. He raises a bitchy little eyebrow, wry. “You know, you are taking it better than Jorge, I don’t think he liked your moves very much.” Marc copying his move again, from Jerez 2010 this time. After the race there this year, Marc had tried to shake Jorge’s hand three separate times, and had only managed it on the plane ride home, once things had cooled off a little bit. It’s not— Marc doesn’t exactly blame Jorge. He knows how he can get, sometimes, on the track, even if he doesn’t regret any of it. But he’s not unaware of the blinders he can have, when a win is in reach, and the problems other riders can have with it.

But he hopes —thinks— that Vale is different. Because he’s right: it’s Vale’s moves that Marc has been using.

“Allora, he will get over it, he’s just sad he lost.” Vale comes back with, immediately, shoulder still clamoring into Marc’s, clearly pleased with the vein of conversation, with ragging on Jorge just a little bit, and Marc beams. Vale understands, of course he does. It swoops through his stomach, better than a wheelie. Almost as good as an overtake, as a podium. Marc’s found another.

“And he’s never liked my moves, anyway.” Vale adds, dancing his eyebrows, innuendo happy on his tongue.

Marc cackles— Jorge wouldn’t—but still needs to be sure. He asks, clumsily, eagerly:

“You’re not mad, that I repeated your pass on Stoner? It wasn’t on purpose, or anything. I didn’t plan it.” It wasn’t really— he had already overtaken him coming in. Vale had made the mistake in the breaking and Marc had already been half a bike ahead. But it had happened like that anyways, thrilling. Fate. A passing of the baton.

Vale considers, takes a drag of his smoke. Waves a hand around once he starts talking.

“It’s different, yes? My pass in 2008 was one of the best— I want to say of all time?” Marc nods, Vale keeps going. “I mean, for the win. A lot of drama. And you know, coming up on Turn 8 I heard you behind me, but I expected you on the other side— so you were very smart. And it’s my move so I can’t say anything. But today, the Honda was—“ He makes a sound effect, blowing air out of his mouth to imitate the speed of Marc’s bike. “You would’ve passed me two turns later no matter what.”

Marc nods, biting his lip. He’s right— his bike was fast.

“So. You say it wasn’t on purpose?” Vale follows up, a sly bent coloring his expression, like he thinks Marc isn’t being 100% honest, but wouldn’t be mad if he told the truth.

“I mean, maybe a little bit.” He says sheepishly, head down in a shrug. It hits Vale, and Marc watches him blink and smile— charmed, Marc thinks, almost despite himself, shaking his head. He scuffs marc’s arm, and Marc feels like he must be glowing. The new model, he had said, earlier in the press conference. Just with more upgrades.

“But now if I do it to you, you can’t say anything.” Vale hits Marc’s chest with a lazy tap of his knuckles. “What is it they say? Rubbing is racing?” He adds, pulling another drag of his cigarette. There’s some scruff at the edge of his jaw, and his little finger is slightly crooked, won’t bend all the way. It makes Marc feel bold—

If he sees an opening, he’s going to take it.

“Well,” He lets intent carry into his voice, hand edging Vale’s on the railing. “Not just racing.”

Vale’s eyes pin him, a split second of surprise. He points at him with his cigarette, makes a face, it zings through Marc like an over-fast corner. “That’s a bad line.”

Marc plays coy— it’s worked so far. “To be fair, if I learned all my moves from you— I haven’t really seen you do this part yet.”

Vale’s shifts, considering, but Marc thinks he’s right there with him, on the line— high on endorphins and that huge, shivery feeling of finding someone who gets it, that same way only someone like them can get it. Vale’s got to be able to feel it too—

The mood thickens, sticky sweet, making Marc hyper aware of everything in the room, making him try and commit it all to memory— the first time they ever do this. He wants to savor it, preserve it like a picture in a frame, review it in the years to come. The quality of the light, the smell of Vale’s cologne, the grain of the railing. He digs his fingers in a little, rolls up on the balls of his feet. He wants to feel everything that he can, as much as he can.

Vale—like always— is still into the joke, skirting around the heart of the issue, performing for an audience of one. He nods, rubs at his chin, looks like he’s considering him.

Marc bites his lip.

Vale moves slowly, like he’s in no hurry at all. He stubs out his cigarette, stepping into Marc’s space, and Marc has to tilt his head back to meet his eyes. They’re half-lidded, lazy. Confident. His pupils are blown, huge in the dim light, and his gaze drops unerringly to the slash of Marc’s mouth. Marc grins. Got him.

“I think you have a lot to learn.”

A hand lands on his waist.

“Will you teach me?” Marc thinks his voice is higher than he wants it to be.

Another hand, low on his back.

“If you want.”

A nose traces the edge of his cheekbone. Teasing.

“I do.” Marc presses them together. “Want.” His breath hitches as Vale responds, leaning into Marc and bringing his thigh up, smooth and firm, so that it presses against Marc’s cock, a shock of sensation. His hand stays where it is, low and possessive on Marc’s back, hot as a brand under his shirt, five fingers against skin.

“Well fuck, Marc, I can see that.”

Marc laughs, hitching his hips forward, dragging against him. They haven’t even fucking kissed yet. “That one of your moves?”

Vale shrugs, eyes still caught on his mouth. Marc licks his lips. A hand drifts to grab his ass.

“Yes.”

“Don’t teach it to anyone else.” Marc asks. Really this should just— this should just be for the two of them.

“Okay.” Vale laughs, sounds surprised, delighted, turned on. It makes Marc rock up on his toes, makes him smile, makes him dig his fingers into the fabric of Vale’s shirt.

Got him, he thinks when Vale leans in, lips meeting Marc’s in a messy clash. He tastes like liquor and smoke.

Got him.

[antianakin]

In TCW season 7, we have Rex discussing the clones' relationship with the war by saying that obviously none of them LIKE the war or like having to fight in it or how often they all end up dying in it, but that they all also recognize that without the war, they wouldn't exist, so they can't quite hate it either. And I love the complexity and nuance of that, but I want to add something to that.

The Jedi.

Because without the war, the clones are super unlikely to have ever met the Jedi. They're unlikely to have ever ended up in a position where they could explore their own individuality as people through means like body modifications. The Jedi are their BEST FRIENDS specifically because of how similar they are and how much the Jedi gave and taught them during the three years they spent together.

And the relationship between the Jedi and the clones is SO complicated because obviously the clones and the Jedi are both harbingers of death for each other. Not just due to Order 66, but the war itself. The discovery of the clones is what leads to the galaxy getting thrown into war and the Jedi forced to lead an army. The Jedi showing up on Kamino was always going to be the signal for the day the clones left their sheltered little home and shipped out to die for a Republic they'd never known. So, on some level, meeting each other is possibly the worst thing that could've happened to both groups of people because it spells their respective dooms.

But from a different perspective, the war was always going to happen anyway, neither the clones nor the Jedi actually START the war so meeting each other logically is not actually what causes it. And while the war is awful, it brings the Jedi and clones to each other, which provides a small bit of light for them both in the sea of darkness that they are stuck in together.

None of them LIKE that the war is what brought them together, but it was. And they can't regret having met each other and the joys that it gave all of them to have known each other. They can't imagine having to go through this war WITHOUT each other; it would've been infinitely worse to have had to do so and they all know it. So not only do the clones recognize they might not have existed at all without the war, but they might never have met the Jedi without the war and that is an unacceptable exchange. The Jedi hate that war has happened, they hate what it's turned them into and what it's doing to the galaxy, but they'd never have met the clones without it and it's hard to hate the thing that brought them that connection.

[marimoscorner]

A Witch’s Hearth: Finding Home in Nature

In our Disconnected, Urban World

Written by Autumn (she/her) 🍁

To most witches, pagans and druids, the nature around us is as much of a home as our own domiciles. It’s healing to go out to an old growth forest, to bathe in the wisdom of beings who lived before you and will likely still stand tall when you are amidst their soil.

However, not everyone has immediate access to the lovely blessing of a deep forest.

I myself recently moved from the deep, lush forests of the PNW to just about as far south as I could go in my car, chasing the light that I need to function. The move has helped with my daily functions and mental health, yes—but I have been left feeling a bit lost without the forests of home.

Join me as I plan some ways in which I can adapt anew to the nature around my new home, how I may incorporate it in my magic, and how I may carve out a new spiritual hearth for myself.

Perhaps this can help inspire folks to tackle their own homesickness with nature, and to reconnect with the world in which they live (whether or not they’ve made a move).

Once again, please take this with a grain of salt—as this is just from my own experiences. I am not a teacher, I am simply recording my thoughts in the hopes to add my voice to the pot. With that, let’s begin! 🌿

A Deep Homesickness

This photo is one my partner took at our engagement up in WA, right before we ran into a bear

The above photo is how I think of home. The deep green of the forest, the blue of the mountains on the horizon. Moss on just about every surface. The rich dirt that sustained it all. Were it not rainy and dark most of the year, I wouldn’t have left.

Now, I find home in a biome all its own. I’m living deeper into a city than I ever have, and I’m feeling isolated from nature. While the beach is close by, any deep woods that remind me of the edges of the wilderness up north are at the very least two to three hours away by car.

Though I have a hard time remembering this, it is not a bad change. Any plant that is uprooted from the earth it’s known its whole life is bound to feel a bit uncomfortable. But perhaps it can flourish if moved to soil better suited for its intrinsic needs.

Though my experience includes a physical move, this can apply to a homesickness you feel due to a simple displacement of nature in this society. Perhaps you aren’t seeing enough nature, or aren’t able to connect with what’s around you.

Let’s forge ahead to tackle this feeling of loneliness head on!

Finding Similarities

This is a photo I took at a hike about 2.5 hrs out of the way down here. Though without as many trees, it felt much more familiar and was beautiful in its own right

In our modern society, we’re left with a longing to return to nature—to our home. You may find yourself longing for a specific kind of view. Perhaps you’re looking for prominence of a particular element—like a roaring river to enact water or plenty of clover to help you feel the earth. The following is a list of steps to tackle this:

Make a list of things you want to see or things that would help you feel at home in nature. Think of your dream location when it comes to the outdoors. What does it look like? What features does it have? How do you feel?

Go online and find trails nearby with as similar to these features as possible. AllTrails has the ability to search for trails with waterfalls, forests, wildflowers, wildlife, etc. for free. Make good use of the wonderful web of resources provided to us.

Make an effort to connect with nature at least once a month, if you can. Be sure to pack for safety—and take a nice hike, or sit under an old tree and journal in your grimoire. Ground yourself and notice the seasons around you

In this way, you’ll help your soul settle and feel comfortable, which will help with our next steps.

Bring a Piece of Nature Home

Here’s one of my cats, Pagan, enjoying our newest garden box arrangement. I’m so proud of how far she’s come since we rescued this tiny baby

Many times, it’s near impossible to find the time in our busy lives during the week to go deep into nature. Thus, we need to take this connection into our own hands, and build our own miniature wild sanctuary.

NOTE: Do not remove plants or creatures from nature. They are there for a reason.

Take inventory of your available space. Is this your entire patio? A shelf? A portion of your altar? A garden box? A whole backyard? Take measurements so you can better plan

Remember your list of natural things you enjoy. Brainstorm some ways to include them in this space. It could be a photo or painting of your dream location. It could also be an actual plant for a tiny breath of fresh air. If you have the space, you could plant a whole garden! It is whatever matters most to you. Try and incorporate your local biome to help enmesh the two worlds, if they are different.

Thrift and shop around to fulfill the needs of this space. The more you can get secondhand or from smaller businesses in your community, the better. You may even be able to ask your neighbors or friends with impressive plants for a cutting to propagate!

Consider the safety of any children or animals in your life. A lot of plants and flowers can be toxic to certain creatures. Utilize the web to determine what is safe for your situation.

Set up your space and enjoy! You may utilize spells or ritual to fully enact the space and help it to feel more magical, but it is really your choice.

For my family, we live in an apartment. We haven’t had a backyard in years. Still, we’ve found way to turn our patio into a spot of natural respite. We utilize a tiered planter in order to make the most of our patio space. Though we’ve included small flowers that remind us of our old home, we’ve embraced the biome we’re currently in and have an entire row of beautiful succulents. Of course, we also added catnip for our babies, and herbs for our kitchen witchcraft. We also put down these outdoor tiles from IKEA that mimic a lawn and wooden patio. On our table, we’ve put a hummingbird feeder to help better support local wildlife, and are discussing an actual bird feeder.

Embracing the Nature Around You

A photo I took of a playful wild crow. He was an excellent little model!

This is a step I still need to complete myself. When biomes don’t match up with how you picture nature in your craft, it can be frustrating! Especially if you’re in a fairly urban area, you may not have much access or choice in which nature you interact with.

Here’s the good thing, though: it’s all nature, regardless of how it shows up in the world.

Start researching your local biomes. Take account of your local parks and community gardens. Study the history of the land that you’re on, and how it played into the lives of the people that it truly belongs to (of course, do not culturally appropriate. This should go without saying). Explore native biodiversity. Find volunteer programs at local organic farms. Visit a farmer’s market. The list of possibilities goes on.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed or don’t know where to start, this is how I’ll be organizing my journey through this step:

Make a list of natural sights in your area that are easily accessible to you. I’m talking within a 30 minute drive or closer level of close. These don’t need to match up perfectly with your perception of nature—you may be pleasantly surprised in what you find when you open yourself up. This could include: parks, hiking trails, state parks, plant nurseries or shops, local/community gardens, farms that allow for visitors, farmer’s markets, local watersheds that allow for visitors, etc.

Visit these locations safely, documenting what you find beautiful and/or spiritual in each one. List aspects of local nature and how that could make an impact if you were to include them in your craft

Create a mini encyclopedia of local spots that you end up loving for days where you’re feeling disconnected and need a quick pick-me-up. You might even create a jar full of folded papers to pick them at random.

Increase the amount of local natural elements that you include in your craft instead of/alongside elements of your idealized natural space. You may find this area around you feeling more like a home or hearth than you ever have before.

Once you start practicing awareness in nature more and more, you’ll start to notice it in more places. This can not only help with your connection to your location, but can help you build your magical hearth in the energy around you.

Giving Back

This is a photo I took at the San Diego Zoo of a weaver finch building its nest

Nature takes care of us, even when we’re detached from it in our cities. We need to take care of it in turn. If you have the means, find some way to give back to the nature around you if you so wish. Here are some ideas:

Give back to the plants with your energy, or make an offering of compost to replenish the soil

Purchase a Membership at a local zoo or aquarium that prioritizes conservation. This way you get to visit, too, while giving back! I love having memberships because I know on each visit I can really take my time and don’t have to rush about.

Volunteer to help reforest, or to help plant at a local garden. This can even be done by donation if you do not have the access or ability to physically participate

Consider giving homegrown herbs/plants to family and friends—or prepare them to help feed those in your community, if you have the means to donate

Teach others in your community how to properly dispose of waste and how they can help keep our natural beauty alive

Simply compost and recycle when the option is available to you

Etc. There is no one right way to do any of this! Just with your intent, you make your community a better place. Thank you for being in it

Thank you for taking the time to read through my little magical journal and ideas. Even if we don’t fully align, I hope that our paths crossing has contributed to even a slight net-positive in your day. I look forward to writing again soon.

[rowanraven08]

Unsolicited tma rant no one asked for:

I’ve been thinking a bit about exactly what makes me like the Magnus archives so much, cause I’m not really into horror anthology. Yeah, it’s a good aspect of the genre, but it’s never really caught my interest that much. And I consider myself a fan of horror, but I don’t actually like that many horror movies that much. I like it as a genre, and watching video essays about it, about how different horror affects us, that sort of thing. Horror doesn’t even make me scared usually. I’ll flinch at jump scares of course, but it’s pretty rare that I’m watching a horror movie and be genuinely afraid of the murderer or demon or whatever’s on screen.

Tma even took me a while to get into. I started it maybe in October or November? And it took me until January to get even a dozen episodes in. It was good, but I was really just waiting until it got to the good bits that made everyone love it so much. I knew there was some sort of meta plot, and had a cannon gay ship, that was all I knew when I started, and the reason I kept on with it. I hate to say it, but if I didn’t know even that, I don’t think I would have listened to more than a couple episodes, because short self contained stories isn’t what I’m interested in. Especially when there’s a magic Latin book and a coffin with knocking (I thought it would be a vampire or something) or some weird thing luring people into alleys to kill them. I took those early episodes to be generic devil worship sort of horror, that the weird details were added in just to add to the spook. That’s something that tends to bother me with horror movies, when there’s all this dark magic just for the sake of dark magic, and ends with this big question or realization that can’t be solved. And I do understand ending movies with something the audience can’t understand, because the mystery and strangeness can add to the horror. But I really dislike this, I’m all cool with hard or impossible to understand endings, don’t get me wrong, but when there’s no way to theorize, no dots to start connecting, I find that really frustrating. A good example (I can’t find what movie it is, so if someone know lmk) is a movie with the classic family moves into large old house, creepy basement, with satanic sort of imagery. I did actually like most of it, the stairs to the basement were normal, until there was a ball knocked down them when the light was off, and you could hear it keep going far longer than the actual staircase was. That these stairs kept going for who knows how long when the light is off. What I didn’t like was the end, where we got to see what was at the bottom of these endless stairs, and there’s long lines of people in this void, just standing there. But there was no explanation for this, no way to start theorizing as to what this could be, why it happens.

This is what I thought TMA was gonna be. Each episode never really ended with an explanation, or a way to theorize (early on) and I thought it would stay that way. I remember in January I was finally listening to more on a plane ride, and got to ep22, Martin’s statement about Jane Prentiss. It wasn’t even this specific episode that got me interested, not fully. I did like the worms, description of Jane prentiss, all that but it was when I kinda realized there was something to theorize about, that there was actually something going on behind the scenes. And it kept me listening. It was a bit frustrating how slow the season seemed to go, because I wanted to know what the worms were about, and I admit I rushed through a few episodes, again, thinking they were just filler short stories to break apart the real meat of it. The episode I think that really sealed the deal was strange music, specifically the bit between Sasha and Jon, I wasn’t too interested in creepy clown dolls, but that silly little debate over how to pronounce calliope was honestly charming. Like “oh, these characters aren’t gonna be overdramatized horror movies characters, at least not too much.” Once I got to the season 1 finale I was obsessed and basically finished the rest in two or three weeks (I listened to the last 120 episode in a single week).

And good lord Jonny I am SO SORRY I DOUBTED YOU. Because none of it was creepy books or creepy dolls or weird coffins for the hell of it, you weren’t actually left with no idea of what the ending meant. You just had to listen to Jon as he because paranoid and pulled out the red string, pulling all the pieces together for you until we finally got the big picture. I never once expected the fears, or avatars, or that Robert smirk was anything but a weird architecture, that Jonah Magnus was anything but a stuffy old man who founded the institute. And that’s why I think I love TMA so much, is there really is a big satisfying pay out as a listener, I didn’t even put the dots together myself and it’s still gratifying. The slow realization that these episodes aren’t just horror for the sake of horror, they have a reason, an explanation, and it still manages to keep a level of mystery and unknowability that makes you just always want to know more. Re-listening has been genuinely so fun, because especially with later episodes I’m able to connect those dots, and see the full picture as it unravels. The thing in the dark alley wasn’t targeting smokers to be spooky, it was a monster collecting victims to use in a ritual, and that addiction is part of the web.

So yeah, that was probably really redundant, but I just really love that slow reveal, all the little bits you can connect, and theories you can make. Jonathan Sims forgive me for ever doubting your writing, I see now you’re a genius, please give me your brain, I need it for my own creativity. Thanks for coming to my ted talk

[swansong-if]

I have a bias Towards achillean Odile x MC, so maybe them talking about books together? Or them playing in the snow? Or just them being cute with each other.

not strictly achillean because i prefer keeping my requests general but here's some quick winter fluff with Odile that lowkey got me in my feels about xem...

❄

Laughter bubbles in your chest as another snowflake falls to rest on Odile’s jaw. It stays there for a while, unperturbed by the unnaturally cool skin, and for one exhilarating moment you think it will never dissolve. But then it does, its crystals melting into a single tear. You watch with a sigh as it trickles down Odile’s neck, and xe shivers a bit.

More snowflakes follow. They settle on xyr hair, on the tip of xyr nose, on xyr pale lips, or they add to the faint freckles on xyr cheekbones like a flurry of butterfly kisses, and they linger there as if time is freezing just to allow the encounter. And then they vanish again. The whole time, Odile doesn’t move. It’s as if xe’s trying not to spook them, transfixed by the show. Xyr dark eyes gleam silver, and it dawns on you: xe’s been trying to make the snowflakes last longer, probably focusing xyr magic to slow the rush of xyr blood. Quite the reckless move, for something so trivial. Your brows furrow.

“Is this your first time seeing snow?” You know, as you speak, that your guess must be right.

Odile blinks a few times, almost reluctantly, to shake more snow from xyr lashes. Xe looks like xe’s been caught doing something mischievous– if xe could blush, you suspect xe would.

“Mhm,” is all xe offers, and you have to purse your lips to keep them from curving into a grin.

You’re a child of snow, raised in a land where winter is king among the seasons. All of this, the blinding white of the landscape, the puffs of air leaving your lips at every breath, or the sting of cold on your fingertips and how it gnaws at your skin, it’s familiar to you. But Odile has lived all xyr life hidden in an enchanted forest and has never known ice and frost.

“Pretty, isn’t it?” You make sure to school your smile into something softer, knowing rather than teasing. Xe regards you for a second and then smiles back faintly. 

“Very.”

When you reach out to slot closer to xem and cup xyr face in your hands, xe lets you without a complaint, wrapping xyr arms around you almost out of reflex. “Are you cold?” You ask a bit worriedly, because while xe still looks as pristine as a marble statue there is a faint vein of purple to xyr complexion that’s almost ghoulish. 

“We should go back inside,” you try, but you don’t make it past the first step because xe stays firmly rooted in place. What– Xyr face suddenly buries in your chest, the curve of xyr nose against your collarbone, and this time you do laugh.

“No.” The answer is barely audible, squished against the thick pelt of your clothes.

“You don’t want to go?”

Another hum. “No.”

“We can warm up next to the fire, together.”

Your voice comes out dripping with honey, as if trying to coax a child. Odile’s reply, however, is as stubborn and petulant as the previous ones; and an equally definitive ‘no’. Xe raises xyr head to meet your gaze and your heart almost skips a beat at the sight of xem, eyes glossy from the frosty winds and a small frown softening the angles of xyr face. 

Childish has never been a word you used to describe Odile, but as you watch the vaguely pouty curl of xyr lips, it is the only one you can think of.

“Just a while longer,” xe pleads, and no power in the world could ever help you deny xem. You nod, and xe smiles. More dazzling than the winter light. Xyr hands find yours and manoeuvre them until they rest on xyr cheeks again, almost as if to say ‘warm me up’, and you shake your head fondly, letting your thumbs rub circles across xyr jawline. 

Odile sighs, xyr eyes briefly shutting in contentment. Then xe opens them again and tilts xyr head questioningly; you know what xe’s asking without having to hear it. Your lips find xyrs barely a second later. If it’s warmth xe needs, you will gladly share yours.

Neither of you notices the snowflakes quickly melting on your faces as you kiss slowly.

[kaidabakugou]

❅ DAY 3: OIL MASSAGE FT. KATSUKI BAKUGOU

❅ WORD COUNT: 4K

❅ WARNINGS: SENSUAL MASSAGE / DUB-CON / ORAL SEX / NIPPLE PLAY / BODY WORSHIP / TEASING / LICKING / BITING / MARKING / UNPROTECTED SEX / CREAMP PIE / LMK IF I MISSED ANY <3

❅ AUTHOR'S NOTE: pretend i posted this 2 days ago :) but anyways here’s day three of 12 days of christmas, i know i said the event would be drabbles and short fics but i had so much fun writing this one that it turned into a long fic, hope you enjoy! <3

❅ 12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS MASTERLIST

it was cold and dark as gray clouds loomed heavily above the busy streets of the city. quickly making your way across the sidewalk as you spot your destination just around the corner, silently begging that you can get there before the skies start pouring. this week has been stressful enough and walking in the rain would only add to your frustration.

the holidays have always been a busy time, and although you enjoyed all the activities that came with this season, you couldn't argue how taxing all the hassle was. which is why you decided to give yourself an early christmas gift by booking a full body oil massage to help you destress and relax.

whispering a small “made it'' under your breath when you finally reach the glass doors of the building and step inside, just in time as you look back and notice small droplets of water starting to fall against the glass. the massage parlor you've visited before was booked so after doing a bit of research you found that this one had great reviews and managed to get an appointment that fit your schedule perfectly.

the place was more welcoming than you imagined, the space was lit by a soft light and candles were distributed around the room, some of them scented creating a relaxing atmosphere. your attention is shifted when a tall redhead behind the front desk welcomes you with a friendly smile, dressed in a tight white shirt that shows his pectorals nicely, you couldn't help but sneak a glance at his large muscles while he was busy searching your name in the system.

shooting you another toothy smile as he guides you towards the back, opening the door for you to another room with a similar atmosphere as the lobby, and handing you a soft robe as he instructs you to take off all your clothes and get comfortable while you wait for the masseuse to come service you. thanking him as he shoots you a wink with the same charming smile before he exits the room to give you some privacy.

stripping your clothes and setting them neatly at a nearby desk as you lace the warm robe around your body, walking around the room while you wait as you take in the soft music playing in the background. inhaling a deep breath when the rich smell from the candles fills your senses, picking up one of the unlit candles as you bring it up to your nose to smell it before flipping it over to see the scent notes, already imagining what some of them are since the unique scent of palo santo has been engulfing you ever since you stepped inside the building. combined with the rich smell of cinnamon and star anise that has your body already feeling relaxed the more you breathe in the spiced fragrances.

the door opening behind you pulls you from your trance as you look over towards it, your eyes meeting with the most alluring vermilion irises you've ever seen, as a tall blonde steps inside the room, wearing the same white shirt as the redhead and some white loose pants as he closes the door behind him. giving you a small smile before introducing himself and telling you he would be your masseuse for the day. he said his name was bakugou, and you couldn't help but repeat it in your head as you took in his broad shoulders and wide muscles straining against the tight shirt.

“you like that scent?”he asks, pointing at the candle in your hands.

“yeah!, i already feel relaxed just breathing it in”, you chuckle while placing the candle back where you got it from.

“good to hear it, you ready to start?”, he asks while pulling some towels from the towel warmer and placing them on the massage table.

“mhm”, you hum as you make your way towards the table.

“great, please take off your robe and lie down while i get the oils ready”, he instructs before turning around to give you some space while he grabs the oils and materials from the shelf. you remove your robe and lay downwards on the table, lacing the warm towel over your rear before adjusting your head to lay more comfortably on the table as you let your arms rest by your sides.

“okay, just relax and let me know if anything, yeah?”, he says while placing a bowl of warm oil next to you.

“okay”, you say before taking a deep breath and closing your eyes, focusing on the relaxing music in the background and the soft sound of rain falling against the window while you wait for him to begin the massage.

dipping his fingers in the oil as he hovers them above your spine, feeling warm droplets fall against your skin before strong warm hands spread the oil across your skin, kneading at your sore muscles as more oil is drizzled along your shoulders. biting your lip to prevent the moan that threatens to spill from your lips the more he massages your skin, rubbing away all the stress accumulated on your muscles as he makes his way towards your lower back. drizzling more oil on your lower spine before working the area gently but firmly, his fingers brushing just above your cheeks under the warm towel before tracing your sides to make his way back towards your shoulders. slowly trailing down your arms as he laces his fingers with yours, working your hands and releasing the tension before making his way back up to your neck.

the sweet smell of almond oil mixing in with the spiced fragrance of the candles the more he lathers it on your skin. moving towards your bottom as droplets of oil fall against the back of your thighs, dropping along the length of your legs all the way down towards your feet before you feel his large hands against your skin. his digits working the stress on the soles of your feet as he works his way up to your thighs. his fingers ghosting against the inside of your thighs making your breath hitch in your throat, the warm towel against your rear feeling too revealing all of a sudden as he keeps working the area.

this was nothing new to you since you've gotten massages in the past, but there was something about the way he expertly kneaded at your skin and how he worked every sore spot on your body with such ease that it had your head spinning. so much so that you barely register the feeling of the warm towel being slipped down from your rear as he starts to work your cheeks, dipping both of his hands inside the warm oil before massaging your glutes in circular motions. cupping your rear and lifting it softly as he continues working your skin.

pulling your bottom lip between your teeth to stop the moans building against your throat from slipping out as he spreads your glutes apart slightly and laces his fingers through them before rounding the outer glutes and repeating the action. releasing how your breaths begin to quicken and get heavier the more his hands massaged your skin. returning from your hypnotic state when you suddenly feel them lift away from your skin.

“flip over for me, sweetheart”, you hear him say near your ear, his voice much lower than when he previously spoke to you as he grabs a new warm towel from the warmer. turning around with your eyes still closed as you lay on your back, exposing the front of your body to him. feeling a fresh warm towel being placed against your eyes, a subtle smell of lavender engulfing your scenes as you take another deep inhale, pushing the fact that you're naked in front of him to the back of your mind as you relax against the cushioned table.

feeling warm oil being dribbled against your chest, hearing him dip his hand in the bowl again as he poured the oil down your abdomen, over your pelvis and down your legs before his hands went back to work the skin in a methodical and hypnotizing manner. every frustration melting away with each knead from his fingers against your muscles as you started to feel heavier and warmer.

his large hands trailed up towards your neck, working the sides with his knuckles before he trailed down and circled your chest. cupping your tits with slippery hands as his fingers grazed against your nipples, gently pulling them between his digits. the sensation made your chest rise and fall a little heavier and your thighs twitch as you felt your clit start to pulse. an action that didn't go unnoticed by the blonde above you, smirking as he continued to knead at your chest before slowly trailing along your curves down to your pelvis.

dipping both of his hands in the oil again, collecting a small puddle of it and pouring it onto your lower abdomen, the oil dripping through your folds and pooling under you on the table as his hands start to massage along the area. circling your thighs whilst his fingers graze against your cunt, the slick forming on your pussy mixing with the oil as your breaths get heavier. his digits finally bruising through your folds cause the moan you've been holding back to spill from your mouth as your lower back slightly arches off the table.

a hand rubbing against your clit as the other spreads your legs wider for him, even though you knew this was wrong, his fingers felt too good for you to form a coherent thought. too caught in your own pleasure to notice the slight dip on the table between your legs, the feeling of a wet tongue licking a long strip on the length of your cunt making you sit up on your elbows as more moans erupt from your chest. pulling the warm towel from your face as your eyes meet his sultry red ones, already looking back at you whilst he continues to lap at your cunt.

the half of his face already glistening with the mixture of slick and oil from your body, his fingers trailing up to your chest as he pulls your nipples between his digits. tongue circling around your clit before sucking the sensitive nub into his mouth, feeling yourself get closer to the edge as your hand stretches down to tangle your fingers in his blonde locks, pressing his deeper into your cunt while lightly grinding your hips against his tongue when he lays it flat against your folds. your thighs shaking at his sides as you cum on his tongue, wrapping his lips around your cunt to lap up your release, not waiting a single drop as he swallows the sweet taste of your juices mixed with the oil.

“feeling relaxed yet, sweetheart?”, he asked, resting his head on your inner thigh whilst his thumb drags slow lines against your sensitive cunt.

“you do this to all your clients?”, you ask back through heavy pants while staring down at him.

“nah, just couldn't resist myself”, he says, smirking up at you while starting to lift from between your thighs.

“such pretty skin” he whispers against your warm skin before placing a kiss on your stomach.

“nice curves”, another kiss on the valley of your breast.

“gorgeous face”, he mumbles against your collar bones before pressing his tongue against the delicate skin of your throat, licking a long stripe all the way up to your chin as you lean your head back to give him access before facing him again.

“and a tasty pussy to go along with it…”, he whispers against your lips while staring deep into yours, “... how could i resist?”, noticing your lips curving into a smirk as he mirrors the action before pulling you into a messy kiss.

the oil from his face transferring onto yours as you continue devouring each other while your fingers curve along the bottom of his tight shirt as you start to pull it off him. breaking the kiss momentarily to discard the piece of clothing before pulling you in for another. pressing your hand to his bare chest as you push him down on the table without removing your lips from his, your fingers lacing along the waistline of his pants as you start to pull them down. leaning back on his forearms, bakugou lifts his hips off the table to help you take them off before discarding the garment. smiling at the pleasant surprise that he didn't have any underwear on and he'd been massaging your naked body with only a thin layer of fabric separating you.

reaching over towards the bowl of warm oil as you dip your hand inside of it, slowly pouring oil on his already erect cock whilst you start to slowly pump his length.

“isn't that my job, sweetheart?” he teases while spreading his legs further to give you more access.

“you took care of me, now it's your turn to relax and let me take of you”, your voice dripping in honey as you lower yourself towards his cock, circling his tip with your tongue while staying on your knees as you arch your back further, displaying the curve of your rear to him whilst sucking his cock further into your mouth. taking your time as you slowly move up and down his cock while your oiled hands twist around him with a firm grip.

his fingers tangling with your hairs as he brushes them behind your ear before resting his hand around your scalp, his digits scraping against your nape while he groans above you. “that's it, right there…”, he whispers as you feel his thighs clench beside you. “... fuuck that's it, suck the tip, baby”, following his orders as you lean your head back to only have your lips wrapped around his mushroom tip. sucking on it while flicking your tongue against his slit while your hands continue to jerk his slippery cock.

his fingers tighten against you as you feel his dick twitch in your grasp, reaching his climax as hot spurts of cum fill your mouth. the salty taste of his release combined with the sweet mixture of the oil making your eyes roll as you moan around his pulsing tip, swallowing every last drop as you continue sucking on it. stopping only when he gently tugs at your scalp from the overstimulation, placing a kiss on his swollen tip before leaning back to look up at his blissed-out expression while you lazily rub his length.

hooded eyes staring back at you while he catches his breath, throwing you a smirk between panting lips as you feel his fingers rub soft circles against your scalp. “come here”, he exhales while his other hand comes to rest at the side of your face, cradling it while lifting you towards him. resting your hands on his muscular thighs as he pulls you into a kiss, a much softer one in contrast to the heated one you first had.

your breaths mixing together when you pull back as you get lost in the red pools of his eyes, looking back at you like you're the most precious thing in the world when you only met him a few hours ago. the realization making your eyes dart towards the clock at the edge of the table in the corner of the room, noticing how you've stayed way past the time of your appointment.

“i should probably get going”, you say, meeting his eyes again.

“why the rush?”, he whispers back at you, his thumbs rubbing against your temples as if he'd done so countless times before.

“don't you have other clients?”, you ask with frowned eyebrows.

“shitty hair will take care of them”.

“shitty hair?”, you ask confused.

“the redhead at the front desk”, you laugh a little when you realize who he's talking about as you raise your hands to rest against his wrists while he continues to cradle your face.

“what's so funny, huh?”, he asks while giving you a puzzled look.

“nothing, it's just his hair it’s not that different from yours though”, you say between chuckles, releasing a louder laugh when you see his surprised face.

“pretty and snarky, huh… gonna have to get you back for that one”, he protests as his hands trail down your sides to rest at your hips as he guides you back down on the table.

settling between your legs as you rest them above his outer thighs. grabbing the bowl of oil as he tilts it over your cunt, pouring what's left of the warm oil over you before trailing up towards your chest. fisting his cock before he presses it against your cunt, gently rocking back and forth as he rubs it between your folds, teasing you as you feel yourself get wetter every time his cock grazes over your clit.

“you want this cock, gorgeous?”, he teases while his fingers trail up to your chest, cupping your breast in his large hands as his digits flick against your slippery nipples. arching into his touch as a moan vibrates in your throat while you frantically nod your head at him.

“yeah?, beg for it then”, setting your pride aside as you desperately beg for him to fuck you.

“please, bak-”.

“katsuki”, he cuts you off.

“katsuki, p-please”, a grin spreads across his face as he slides his cock down to align himself with you. a wave of pleasure hitting you as he shoves his length inside you in one swift thrust, not giving you time to adjust as he sets a steady pace. leaning down to lick your sensitive buds, sucking one into his mouth while his digits flick the other before his tongue trails a long, wet stripe towards your neck, leaving open mouth kisses along your side and below your chin until his hands comes to rest against the side of your face to pull you in a fervent kiss.

feeling the knot inside your stomach form again the more he thrusts into you, as your nails trail up against his back to rest against his shoulder blades, leaving red lines in their wake. his other hand gives your nipple a final tug before reaching down in between your bodies to rub messy circles against your clit. the overwhelming sensation of his tongue tangled with yours and his cock ramming against your walls with the added stimulation of his fingers on your erect bud sending you over the edge as you gush all over him. your release soaking both of you as he continues thrusting into you, fighting against the tight clenching of your pussy as he chases his own release.

feeling your wet tongue drag along the side of his neck all the way up to his earlobe as you suck it into your mouth, circling his piercing inside your mouth before pulling back to trail back down to the crook of his neck as you sink your teeth into his skin, hard enough to leave a mark without breaking the skin. the feeling of your tongue sending shivers down his spine and the added sting of your teeth catching him off guard, making his eyes roll back as he buries his cock deep inside your cunt. filling your pussy with his release as it starts to spill through the sides of your cunt, your juices mixing together as he empties his balls inside of you.

collapsing on top of you as he buries his face in the crook of your neck, your warm bodies melting into each other with the mixture of oil and sweat as you both catch your breaths while clinging to one another. placing kisses on your neck while you place them on his shoulder before he lifts his head to press his lips against yours, leaning back to admire your blissed out look while threading his fingers through your hair, his nails gently massaging your scalp with each swipe of his hand.

“am i gonna see you again?” he whispers against your lips as his eyes stare deep into yours as he waits for your answer. adoration mixed with a hint of fear that he misinterpreted this entire situation, and you won't return his advances.

“i hope so”, you chuckle back at him. relieve settling into his chest at your words as he smiles back at you before pressing his lips to yours again. a soft knock on the door interrupts you, making him grunt against you whilst you pull your bottom lip between your teeth to contain your giggles.

a muffled “everything okay?” sounds behind the door before bakugou responds to dismiss the redhead. releasing your chuckles when he buries his face in your neck again with a heavy sigh, neither of you wanting to part from each other’s warmth just yet as you stay wrapped against the other a while longer. his cock still inside you as your cunt leaks onto the table below you while your fingers thread through his blonde spikes, scratching gentle circles on his nape while his digits rub behind your ear, reveling in each other’s presence before you have to clean up and part ways.

sending you off with another kiss at the door of the massage room as he hands you a small bag with the candle you were smelling earlier before giving your rear a small slap as you make your way down the hall and back to the lobby. wondering if the pretty redhead at the front desk heard your moans all the way over to the front, spotting him standing by the shelves in the corner next to the front desk organizing some of the incense the parlor had displayed throughout the establishment, shooting you that same toothy smile as you smile back at him.

“everything to your liking?”, he asks while grabbing one of the boxes of the incense.

“definitely, thank you so much for squeezing me in”, you answer him while making your way towards the exit.

“oh, before you leave, here you go…”, he says while handing you the incense box in his hands.

“a little something as a thank you for choosing our parlor”, he adds while telling you his name, scratching the back of his head as he realizes he should've done it earlier. laughing at how this giant of a man has the sweetest personality, thanking him before you say your goodbyes. smiling to yourself when you pretend not to notice the bulge in his pants, confirming your suspicion that kirishima probably heard the whole thing, excited to make your next appointment at the parlor to see his reaction as you make your way back home.

finally relaxing against some warm blankets as you open the bag that bakugou gave you, smelling the incense that kirishima gifted you first as you laugh while thinking back on everything that occurred. the mixture of the sweet scent of frankincense combined with the earthy notes of myrrh fill your nostrils as you close your eyes while the fragrance floods your senses, a moan building in your throat the more you smell it before setting it aside for later.

grabbing the candle you fell in love with back at the parlor as you open it, eager to smell it again but before you can bring it to your nose you notice something inside of it. picking a small piece of paper from the top of the wick as you set the candle down to open it, grinning to yourself as you find a phone number written on it with the message “call me” below it and a badly scribbled heart right next to it. picking your phone from your bedside table as you dial the numbers on the paper, bringing it up to your ear as it rings while biting the nail of your thumb in anticipation before you hear the line on the other end pick up.

“took you long enough, sweetheart… thought you'd never call”.

[softboiledwonderland]

I'm rewatching The Librarians and I know everyone says S4 is the weakest season but like. it's perfect? It's literally art? Yes they went out on a limb a bit with some of the choices (not talking about the LITs arguing over who should be the Librarian, btw - of course they would! they had a whole episode about self-fulfilling prophecies! it makes so much sense in the context of the plot and their personal development), but! The last two episodes are perfect, just perfect, so genuine and heartfelt and earnest, everything I've loved about this show since the beginning, brought up to the next emotional level because hey - Eve carried the entire Library in her head and that's what saved it. And so did Flynn (Flynn!! Asylum Flynn broke me), and Jacob, and Cassandra, and Ezekiel! All of them are the heart of the Library, all of them are its keepers and its friends, they carry entire worlds in their heads and that's what saved the world! (I want to add something about Jenkins here too - I guess it's enough to say that none of them even wanted to stay on after what happened to him, of course he is its heart and keeper and friend too.)

That entire beginning of And the Trial of One, all dark and quiet and homey with Cassandra deciding to switch out the animal-cruelty stuff in the magic spell for tofu alternatives, hits so different knowing what's going to happen, and then there's that nightmare of a trial, and after that we step into that awful beige, mundane world without color or light or anything that means something, and Eve is trying to gather everyone and save them and slowly forgetting her home, everything that made her human instead of a shell, grasping at something that keeps slipping away like the memory of a dream… And Flynn!! Flynn who has been there for ages, and is still clinging to it! And the other three, who never forgot their dreams either!

And the writing, just the writing and the background music and the performances:

"You wonderful woman! You brought us all home." "You'll make me cry. I'm just a Guardian. Just doing my job." "No, you are the Guardian. You are my Guardian. Our Guardian." ;_;

"No, I gave everything I had to the Library, I gave it my love, I gave it my trust, and it took Jenkins! And I hate it!" (both Cass and I start sobbing here) "My best friend the sword, he taught me how to parry and thrust!" Flynn I love you so much <3

"We don't have to go home. We're already there."

I wouldn't say S4 is my favorite season, but in so many ways it's the most special one. Not because we say goodbye to the Library, but because the characters almost did - and then they brought it back, letting us know that it will always be there for us too.

[ladylooch]

I might have to request Nico fluff cause the last one you wrote was absolutely brilliant😭 and if you want to add some spice to it I'm down

The answer to any Nico fluff request will always be yes. Forever. He is so easy to write. And I really love this AU. So how about the fluffiest fluff there ever is in human existence 💍

This is part of the What My World Spins Around AU. Catch the other blurbs on my master list here.

Word Count: 2.4k

Warning: 18+ Content!, fluff, drinking, swearing because I like the F word... and smut LOL.

The final bubbles of my glass of champagne pop and sputter against my lips as I bring the flute to my mouth. I finish the drink off, glancing over my shoulder. I scan the inside of the restaurant, searching for Nico. He’s been in the bathroom for awhile. I hope he’s okay. Not seeing him in my immediate view, I turn back to the street just beyond our patio seating.

We are back in Switzerland for another off-season. The Devils year ended short of a Stanley Cup, but their captain is in much better spirits compared to last summer. The team grew so much this year; Nico did too. He became stronger in his leadership, more sure of the direction of the team and the future management has been promising him since he was drafted.

It feels like their hard work has pushed them forward enough to ease the sting. Instead, he can barely wait for the puck to drop next season.

I watch as a couple of bikers stride through the street towards the setting sun. It’s hinting at beautiful colors tonight. I pull my phone up to attempt a picture, but it’s pointless. The colors are prettier than the phone can even show.

I reach for my flute again, disappointed when I remember I already drank the last of it.

“Sorry, babe.” Nico announces his presences as he moves to stand next to me.

“Are you okay?” I ask, placing my hand on his wrist. He looks flushed and like he’s a bit troubled.

“Yeah. Just got caught up in a conversation inside.” He assures me. I nod in understanding. It’s a common occurrence when we are here. “You up for a walk?” He extends his hand to move my hair behind my ear, then off my shoulder. My dark curls cascade down my back drawing his brown gaze as they cover the bare skin of my upper back. I look around for our waiter, not seeing him in immediate view. “I already paid.” He tells me. I pause, wrinkling my nose at his weird behavior.

“A little impatient tonight.” I chuckle, grabbing my purse and accepting his outstretched hand.

“You do see this sunset right? It’s amazing. If we can get beyond the buildings in the next few minutes, it will be even better.”

I trust the Swiss native at his word and allow for him to hustle me down the street. My wedges hate the cobblestone path, so Nico has to continuously steady me as we go. We break through the buildings into an open area that leads to the marina and glacial lake we live on the other side of. 

“Oh, wow.” I whisper. “You should have picked a house on this side of the lake.”

“They won’t build anything new over here. Ground is too unsteady in the winter.” His gaze is intense in front of us like he’s facing a fierce opponent, not staring at a gorgeous, summer sunset.

“Bummer.” I pout, following him down to the public pier that leads into the clear, blue water. 

As we walk, the colors begin to change from soft glows of yellow to bursting warm colors beginning with pink and ending with orange and reds.

“Wow.” I whisper to him, completely mesmerized.

Our fingers are linked loosely together as we walk, swinging between our bodies. The colors intensify more, causing the lake to toss diamonds across it’s glass surface. The hues dance along the Swiss Alps causing an idyllic glow in the valley. It’s breathtaking and indescribable. My eyes drink in the sight, barely noticing when Nico’s fingers drop from mine. I stand rooted to my spot, trying to remember each flick of light across the mountains.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen-” I turn, to face Nico completely. When I see him down on one knee, my words get stuck in my throat. “Ah.” Sputters out with what is left of them. 

“You are without a doubt the love of my life.” His voice shakes as he pulls in a breath. My hand clasps over my mouth as I close my eyes, whispering ohmygod over and over to myself. “I love you in ways I didn’t know were possible to love another person.”

“Yes.” I whisper to him, nodding my head and reaching for his shoulders. I drop to my knees, sliding my hands around his neck to stroke his cheeks with my thumbs. I tug his face to mine for a desperate kiss.

“I’m not done.” He laughs against my mouth. 

“Yes.” I insist again, pressing my lips more forcefully to his.

“I haven’t asked.” He reminds me, but his tongue comes out of his mouth to tangle with mine. I pull back to look at him. His face swims in my growing tears. One spills over my bottom lash so he catches it with his thumb. My lips wobble, trying to stuff the happy sob in my throat. I end up bitting into my tongue until I can taste blood in my mouth.

“I never want to know what it’s like to not have this. I want you with me for every moment, good and bad and average, for the rest of my life.” He smiles as more tears dash down my cheeks. I nod enthusiastically in wholehearted agreement. He reaches out for my face. I gasp as I lean into his touch. “Will you marry me?” It’s an excited whisper that has an effervescent grin pulling my cheeks tight.

“Yes!” I squeal, head tilting back and spilling electric laughter. “Yes! Yes! Yes!”

He pops the black ring box open and I practically faint.

“Oh… my GOD. Nico.” I am flabbergasted by the size of the diamond. It’s an oval cut in a platinum setting with several smaller diamonds that form a V down the sides of the band. It’s better than my wildest fantasies or any ring on my Pinterest board.

“You like it?”

“I love it.” I watch my hand tremble as he slides the ring onto my finger. 

“Whew, it fits.” He grins at me when he secures it in place.

“Oh.. how I love you.” I whimper to him, pressing our lips together again. The kiss is filled with sweetness. We share soft, open presses of our mouthes while his hands hold us firmly together.

Cheers break us apart. I look behind Nico and see his parents rushing towards us. Katja has her arms thrust into the air in excitement. Rino hold his hands up to his mouths to hoot at us. I smile, hiding my nose in Nico’s shoulder.

“I think we know those people.” I say, kissing the crook of his neck.

“They insisted on watching.” He chuckles, maneuvering us both to stand. I catch the glint of my ring as I brush a piece of my hair behind my ear. I can barely believe this is happening. Nico wraps his arms around my hips as we watch their final, joyful approach. His touch is grounding, but just in case this is a dream, nobody wake me up.

Nico keeps the celebration with his parents quick. We snap pictures, doing all the ring related poses and popping of champagne. Strangers embrace us with hugs and warm wishes of congratulations. I’m overwhelmed by the feelings of love and joy sweeping from every part of my body. Before I know what is happening, Nico is ushering me back to the car.

We crash into the house when we get home, beginning to strip each other’s clothes off. 

“All I want on you is your engagement ring.” Nico tells me, tugging my dress over my head. My matching red, peek a boo lingerie has him groaning.

“You sure about that?” I ask him, watching as his eyes drink me in. He steps forward, leaning his head down to suck my nipple into his mouth through the fabric. The barrier is too much. He shoves the cup down, gripping my breast tightly in his hand before sucking me deeper into his mouth. “Ahhh.” I whine to him, fingers threading into his long locks.

“Yeah I’m sure.” His nostrils flare when he pulls away. On the counter, the world demands our presence. Vibrating and flashing with text messages and phone calls, begging to hear about how the Swiss captain proposed.

They can wait. We can’t.

Nico reaches around to unclasp my bra, happy when it falls to our feet. 

“So fucking beautiful.” He hums, reaching for my other breast, tugging the pink nipple into his mouth. His teeth scrape lightly against it, making me wiggle impatiently in his arms. I reach for his hand, sliding it into my panties and beginning the motion I want from him. He grins, hooking my leg around his waist so he can run his thumb in tighter circles. My head knocks back to almost between my shoulder blades as I cry my appreciate to my future husband.

When my head snaps back, I turn into a vixen.

“You got on your knees; it’s only fair I repeat the favor.” I drawl. His glinting brown eyes watch my descent to the floor. He tugs his bottom lip into his mouth watching as I pull his thick shaft from his pants. His palms come to gather my hair at the back of my head. He tugs the hairs tight, holding my head back as his erection bounces against my tongue. He leers down at me as I stroke from base to tip. My wet mouth encloses around his head completely, sucking in steady pulses around the sensitive skin. Nico’s knees almost buckle.

“Look at how pretty my fiancé looks with me in her mouth.” He moans as I suck him deeper. 

“Ring looks good too.” I point out, showing him the glittering of the diamond against his taut skin.

“Mmm, almost as good as you.” He groans as I swirl my tongue along his seeping head. I take him as deep as I can, letting him set his hands on my head to fuck my mouth. His thrusts deepen and I resist the urge to gag around his hefty length. He sighs heavily as he falls from my mouth. “I can’t.” He confesses. “Not going to last long enough to get inside of you.” He reaches for my hands to pull me up. “Where?” He asks.

“Right here.” 

“Nah.” His head shake is assertive. “You deserve better than the floor.” He kisses my lips, swirling his tongue in my mouth to taste the last bit of himself there. His hands press into my hips, steering me towards the living room. We get to the couch wrapping our arms around each other, falling on it together. Our tongues meld as one, enjoying the company of one another’s mouthes. 

Nico reaches between us, gripping his cock to put himself between my folds. His fingers play with me, massaging me until I’m whimpering beneath him again.

“Nico.” I’m exasperated, too empty to keep playing this game with him. “Please.”

“Beg a little more.” He asks me watching my face as my eyebrows pull together in need.

“I can’t… please, I can’t wait anymore.” I don’t even need to play it up. I’m that desperate for him. He likes the sound of my pleading. One more stroke down my heat and he smoothly pushes himself inside of me. 

“Oh.” We both moan at the same time.

“So good.” He whispers into my mouth. He kisses me sloppily as his thrusts push me up the couch. The crown of my head hits the arm of it quickly. I wince slightly and Nico adjusts the pillow to protect my head. “Better?” He asks me, watching my face intently. I nod eagerly. With my head safe, he begins to increase the tempo. His hips snap and roll, then his staccato thrusts increase as he widens my knees.

“Fuck, baby you are gorgeous. So.. god damn perfect.” His long locks dance in front of his face as he looks down at us connecting. His gaze returns to mine when I scratch my nails down his arms. “Keep looking at me like that.” He murmurs, hand coming down to stroke my face. “Don’t look away.” I bite my lip, causing Nico to groan again. “So sexy.” My eyes close and he squeezes my cheeks as a reminder. “Me baby, eyes on me. I want you to see who makes you feel this good.” My fingers move from his arms to his ass cheeks, forcing my nails in to make him increase the tempo. “Tell me.”

“I want more, Neeks. Please. Just a little.”

He tilts my hips up, adjusting me so he can go deeper. I lurch off the couch, arching my back as he strokes my inner walls just right. My hand comes down, touching my clit in soft circles. Nico brings a hand to my breast, massaging it beneath his fingers. 

“Baby.” It’s a breathless whisper that falls from my swollen lips greedily. I grit my teeth, eyes closing. Nico leans down to my ear, hot gulps of air enclosing the space between us.

“I’m so addicted to you, sweet girl.” He murmurs, thrusting faster into me. “The rest of my life still won’t be enough of you.” My fingers grip the back of his neck. Then, my nail beds turn white against Nico’s skin as I come, taking him right with me.

I’m shaking when Nico jerks a final time inside me. His strong arms hold most of his weight over me, but our chests stick to each other. I feel his nose on my shoulder. He glides his way to the dip of my neck then kisses his way up my cheek to my lips. Our breathing collides between our faces in ragged exhales.

The way he looks at me has tears building in my eyes.

“Do I really get that look forever?” I whisper to him, fingers ghosting along his face to brush his hair back from his eyes. He doesn’t speak just nods.

There are some things words can’t describe.

The feeling of laying in Nico’s arms, newly engaged and freshly loved, is definitely one of those things. 

[nonstoplover]

fake or not fake ~ daniel ricciardo (dr3)

my masterlist | my f1 masterlist

pairing: daniel ricciardo x fem!reader

summary: a prank in a bar by his friends, then some slight embarrassment, that might just lead to something bigger and better.

words: 2.8K

warnings: explicit language, mentions of drinking, and fluff. just fluff.

a/n: no, i did not get the inspo for this from narcos 1x1... lmao. i haven't even watched more episodes (at least not yet) but that scene just got stuck in my head. so credit goes to screenwriters of narcos i guess.

and you know that i just had to write something ahead of this very emotional weekend. i'm not ready btw. (i'm gonna miss you so much, sv5 and dr3, i don't know what i will do after sunday. f1 will never be the same without the two of you.)

reader, please don't be a ghost, all feedback is well appreaciated, rb or comment!

taglist: formulapierre

"Are you sure it's a good idea?" Sebastian asks, leaning back in the booth, his eyes glancing back and forth from the bar counter – or more specifically the two girls sitting there – to his friends-slash-colleagues sitting opposite him.

"When do any of his ideas turn out to be good?" Lewis lets out a chuckle, earning a light punch in the shoulder from George along with an exclaimed, huffish hey.

"It's going to be alright, don't worry. Danny can take a joke," George says in defence of his idea he just announced to the other two a minute ago. "And by the way, that girl is one hundred percent his type. He won't mind."

As if he was summoned by the mention of his name, Daniel appears in their sight on his way back from the bathroom, a spring in his step as his head slightly moves around to the beat of the song playing.

"Okay, let's do this," Seb mumbles, all three pairs of eyes trained on their fellow driver as he approaches.

"What's up, guys, why are you all silent? Does the conversation just die when I'm not around?"

Daniel chuckles at his joke, and Sebastian playfully rolls his eyes whilst scooting a bit further inside the booth to let his friend sit down comfortably. "Yeah, sure."

The chat between them sparks up again, just as light and fun as it was before – and as it always has been in their group. The perfect way to let go of all the tension of the racing season. They were lucky to have a free Monday evening after another race weekend.

Not many minutes pass though before George quickly glances at Seb with a mischievous glint in his eyes, then turning his attention to the victim he's chosen for his newest prank.

"Actually, D, while you were coming back, that girl at the bar just couldn't keep her eyes off you," he nods with his chin, pointing in the two girls' direction.

"She was full-on checking out your ass, too," Lewis adds, voice slightly shaky from the laughter he truly struggles to hold back now – luckily only Seb knows him and his voice enough to notice it, but he still kicks the Brit gently and noiselessly under the table. If they're really going to do this prank, they can't have Lewis blowing it before anything happens.

Daniel turns his head slowly and as casually as he can manage, to catch a look at the mentioned girl. "Which one?"

"(y/h/c) hair, dark blue top, sitting with her friend."

"You kiddin'."

"Why would I? I'm just informing you, thought you might appreciate it," George shrugs, and Seb has to admit to himself that the kid is a way better actor than he'd expected him to be.

After turning towards the counter as well – as if he'd never seen the girl before and he's just checking who the two Brits were talking about –, the German gently pushes Danny's shoulder with his own. "You should go for it."

"I don't know, man, I'm here to spend time with you, not with some random girl."

"Oh, come on, you'll have dozens of nights like this with us, and this girl, you might never see her again," Seb can feel himself get more and more into this joke as time passes. "Don't tell me you'd actually give up an opportunity like this."

"I agree," Lewis chimes in. "You prefer our boring faces instead of that girl?"

"I know that she's your type, Danny, just man up and go get her," George delivers the final push.

"Fuck it, I'm going."

With that Daniel gets to his feet, wiping his palms swiftly on the jeans hugging his thighs. A look back at his friends – catching the sight of a thumbs up from Seb – and he's off. Calculated, confident steps take him to the counter, where he immediately goes for it, without a second thought, leaning against the wooden furniture right next to the girl.

She momentarily glances at him, a little disturbed by the sudden appearance of someone next to her, so close that she can the body heat radiating off him. There's plenty of room on his other side, he could've easily stopped a bit further away, a bit less in her personal space, she thinks to herself somewhat irritated, but she doesn't want anything to ruin her night, so she leaves it without any comment said to the man.

But then the next second Daniel leans forward, trying to catch her eye. His signature smile – the more flirtatious version – is playing on his lips, with words spilling from them, and it's painfully obvious they're directed at her. "How're you doing?"

With a sigh, (y/n) half turns away from her best friend, casting bored eyes at the man. "Busy," she replies, "and having a great time with my friend."

The unspoken continuation of the sentence hangs in the air, unmistakable even to Daniel. 'And you're ruining it right now.'

Confusion fills his mind, the smile slowly fading from his face as she turns away and he leans back. If she was checking him out, what is going on now? Why does she seem so fed up with him? Did he do something wrong? Insecurity kicks in, and his eyes flicker back towards his friends.

George is doubled over, his whole upper body shaking with laughter, Lewis is shaking his head with a wide grin spreading across his cheeks, and Seb obviously tries to hide himself, sliding down in his seat in the booth until only small parts of him are visible, but it's still clear he's laughing away as well.

'I know she's your type, Danny.'

'You should go for it.'

Their words are on swift repeat inside his mind, and suddenly everything makes sense. It was a stupid prank. Shaking his head in disbelief and biting on the inside of his cheek to stop the surprised chuckle threatening to escape, Daniel wonders which one of the three originally came up with it. He'll have to find a way to get revenge for this.

Oh, the embarrassment he's feeling right now.

His eyes move back to the girl as he slowly pushes himself away from the counter in order to saunter back to their booth. He mentally debates apologising for being so straight-forward. After all, she must think he's some total creep now, being so pushy even though she never expressed even a tiny piece of interest in him.

But then the perfect idea forms in his mind, and another quick look at the three drivers and how they're still enjoying themselves over there confirms to him that it's the best thing he could ever come up with. It's already somewhat a revenge in itself, and there's no way he'd back down from a challenge.

So after that one first step taken away from the two girls, he turns right back around and leans in once more. He can clearly see the frustration in her eyes now, but even that doesn't stop him this time. If she just listens to him this once, she will never see him again, and all her frustration can go away.

"Yes?" (y/n) asks impatiently.

"I'm sorry, we got off to a bad start–"

"You don't say," she mumbles, interrupting him.

"–but if you look to the side you can see three guys in that booth laughing." Daniel waits for her to do as he told, and a long second later she rolls her eyes and with another sigh turns her head. "They are my friends, and they thought it would be funny to make me come here by telling me you were checking me – and my ass if we're tryna be exact – out before. But I mean, who'd check out a race driver's ass?"

"You're a race driver?" (y/n) asks back with the first thing that comes to her head. She's still trying to comprehend the story he's told her.

"I am."

"Nascar?" (y/f/n) chimes in, leaning closer to the two, and Daniel spares a glance at her, only for his mind to conclude that her friend has nothing on her, she really is one of the most gorgeous women he's ever had the pleasure to see.

(y/n)'s lips momentarily pull into a grimace at her friend's intervention, and he catches it just before it disappears. She probably doesn't like Nascar then.

"Nah, Formula One actually," he replies, curiously waiting to see if it triggers the same reaction from her. Nothing happens, to his great relief.

"So that's why he's moving in so fast," her best friend chuckles in the background, eliciting a giggle from her.

"Be careful, (y/f/n), or he'll move so fast by you that you'll get whiplash," she can't help but add jokingly, her eyes swiftly moving along his body. She has to admit, the man actually looks quite attractive.

Daniel shakes his head at their antics, before determinedly going back to his mission.

"Listen, if you could help me out, I'd be forever grateful. I would offer to buy you two a drink, but that might come off as flirting again and I don't want to make you more uncomfortable, so you have to make do with knowing I'm grateful."

"What do you want me to do?" (y/n) squints her eyes, turning more serious as she waits to hear his plan.

"Give me your number."

She raises an eyebrow in surprise. It wasn't what she expected. That she can easily do. "Is a fake number good enough for you?"

"As long as you give me anything I can show them, I'm okay with it," Daniel shrugs.

"Fine," another sigh escapes her lung, holding her hand out towards him in the air, palm facing up, waiting for his phone.

His eyes light up, and he scrambles to pull the device out of his back pocket, unlocking it on the way before placing it in her palm. She deliberately turns her body a bit so that his friends can definitely see her typing away on his phone, before handing it back to him.

"Here you go."

"Thanks, and sorry for bothering," Danny flashes a wide grin towards her, showcasing all his shining, pearly white teeth to her, before wheeling round and making his way back towards the booth.

(y/n) shakes her head, still not being able to fully comprehend the situation. "Why did you let him go like that? He was actually so hot," (y/f/n) scolds her, shoulders bumping into hers as she watches him retreat from the corner of her eyes.

"Who said I did?" (y/n) replies, her voice a bit dreamy and distant.

"What?" her friend lets out a laugh in disbelief. "You gave him your real number, didn't you?"

"I might have," she shrugs, turning back towards the counter.

"And what if he doesn't realise this? I mean, you did in fact tell him it's fake."

"Then it's his problem. It was worth the risk," with a giggle into her glass she takes a sip of her drink. Maybe it was the small amount of alcohol already in her system that made her decide on such a crazy thing. "I didn't want to make it so easy for him."

"I can't decide if you're a genius or an idiot."

They burst out laughing at the same time. Whatever happens, this will be a fun story to tell in the future, she decides. What she doesn't know is that the attractive guy has turned in his seat at that very moment, hearing her laughter even through all the noise of the bar, and is now watching her with happy amusement.

When Daniel arrives back at their booth, the first thing he does is to lean in above the table and smack the back of George's head. "I know it was your idea, Russell George."

"What? Why?" the younger Brit exclaims, rubbing the skin where Danny's hand made a contact. He's still unable to stop chuckling though.

"Lewis is too nice for it, and Seb is not cruel enough."

Sitting down in his seat, shaking his head, Daniel casts a look on all three of his friends that's meant to be reprimanding but only comes off as funny, especially when it comes to the two older drivers. All four of them are simply grinning wide in the end.

And in the middle of the just setting, temporary silence, the Aussie places his unlocked phone on the middle of the table. "But your plan didn't work out quite how you thought, did it?"

He leans back and watches joyously as the three move closer, feeling oh so satisfied to see the shock settling on their faces.

"That's her number, idiots."

"What?" Daniel can hear George's mumbled disbelieving, probably rhetorical question, which only fuels his satisfaction.

"That's how you do it. Next time, watch and learn instead of laughing your asses off."

A couple hours later Danny arrives back to his hotel room, and flopping down on his bed pulls out his phone to scroll on social media for a while, not in the mood to go to sleep just yet. It was such a nice night, he wants to enjoy the content feeling buzzing in his body a little more.

As his phone unlocks, his eyes fall on the saved newest contact. He's totally forgotten about her – how could he? He forgot how he locked his phone right away after showing her number to the other three drivers, and didn't use the device again until now.

But now her number and name are right there, in front of his eyes, and he can't help but think back to those breathtaking (y/e/c) eyes. He wishes he could see them again.

His finger hovers above the call button before his mind can catch up to his actions, but freezes just in that very moment. She gave you a fake number, his mind tells him.

Yeah, but what if she didn't? What's the worst that can happen? He wakes some old grandpa up in the middle of nowhere. And so what?

So in the next moment, when his finger moves again, Daniel doesn't stop himself, and lets the skin on the pad of his finger press onto the screen. It rings six times, and he's close to giving up and just ending the call when someone finally answers.

With bated breath he waits, his nerves tickling, muscles tense as he's laying on the soft mattress.

"Hello?"

He immediately recognises the voice. It's her.

"So it wasn't a fake after all," he can't help but smirk to himself.

"No, it wasn't," she replies, and Danny can basically hear how she rolls her eyes playfully at him.

"Why'd you say it was fake then?"

"Wanted you to figure it out yourself."

"You give me way too much credit if you think I'm that clever," he chuckles.

(y/n) giggles, her heart fluttering in her chest. She'd been waiting for him to call, but slowly started giving up hope he actually would. And now she's actually talking with him.

"I thought you'd like a challenge, Mr Race Driver."

"Oh, I did."

A second or two passes in silence, both just contently breathing, happy that they didn't lose this opportunity, to speak to the other again.

"I'm Daniel, by the way," he speaks up again, just wanting to hear her voice again, more than anything else.

"I know. I looked you up in Google," she admits.

"Did you?" Daniel bursts out laughing. (y/n) joins him a moment later, and he swears there are butterflies in his stomach and chest by the sound.

When they calm back down, it's her turn to break the sudden quiet. "I'm (y/n)."

"Nice to meet you, (y/n)," he speaks her name slowly, carefully, rolling it around his tongue, trying to get a taste of how it feels to say it. A beautiful name for a beautiful girl.

"You too, Daniel." Her voice is soft, so soft he could fall asleep just listening to her – especially if she says his name. It's like being in heaven.

"Are you free tomorrow?"

"Wow, you really don't wait around a lot," and just like that, he earned another chuckle from her.

"I'm leaving town two days from now, that's the reason." He shrugs, even though he knows she can't see him.

"Oh." A long pause, one that scares Daniel for a moment that his previous announcement scared the girl. "I'm free in the afternoon actually," she adds then, and he's back to grinning with that signature, teeth-flashing smile.

"Good."

What has she gotten herself into?, she can't help but think as her heart beats rapidly in her chest and in her throat.

She doesn't know the answer, not just yet, but she can feel that it's going to be one hell of a wonderful adventure.

.::the end::.

my masterlist | my f1 masterlist

i just had to put another gif of him, i couldn't stop myself. sorry not sorry. let me know what you thought, i'm dying to hear from you.

[buffyfan145]

Just saw this new interview with Leon Wadham who plays Kemen on "Rings of Power" and it's got me wondering again who exactly are going to be the 9 Nazgûl and he just shot up on possible candidates going by what we've seen on the show and know about them from the books. We've already had some major hints that one of the main season 3 plotlines will be revealing who the 9 men ringbearers are and while I do think we might get some new cast members for a few I think we already do know some. Spoiler speculation for s3 and beyond behind a cut and what storylines I think are coming.

Leon talked in this article about what happened in ep 2.5 and how bad it already is in Númenor and how much worse it'll be when Sauron and the rings get there. For those that aren't that familiar with the books some of the 9 likely are from Númenor but not all. This is why Sauron is likely still going to be in Middle Earth for most of s3 to give out the rings to those that live there before he lets himself get captured to go back to Númenor. This makes me think it's got something to do with Isildur and when he goes back as he's key to help his father and brother (who should be cast soon) lead the Faithful out and save them by bringing them to Middle Earth likely in season 4.

So before that happens I do think Sauron will be back in his Halbrand form pretending to be a man to persuade some of 9 and other men to his side. Then we add in what could happen with Galadriel in the finale too as he still hasn't made the One Ring yet at the end of s2 (this has already been confirmed) and there's so many theories that she might be with him for a time either to convince him to not attack the elves in Imladris/Rivendell or she gave into his darkness for a chance. Either way I do think she's involved somehow with this storyline too as in the books this is one of those gap times with her as after Eregion falls she doesn't show up again till she finds Lothlorien and already has her baby daughter, so the show had room to give her a new storyline as long as in the end she goes back to the light and finds out her husband is still alive or came back from the dead.

Back to the 9 I do think Kemen and Theo likely are 2 of them. One of them could even be the Witch King of Angmar and I'm leaning towards Kemen as the Witch King is speculated by most book fans to be from Númenor and having royal blood. Kemen being Ar-Pharazon's son helps with that and the hints we got. Plus, knowing the Witch King is the leader of the other 8 too and takes over Angmar early in the 3rd Age while Sauron is in Dol Guldor. I know there's a theory Theo could be this character too as we don't know who his father is/was, so it'll depend on how Sauron interacts with these two characters in s3/s4 as he already met both of them. But will point out with what Kemen did in the last episode knowing if he's the Witch King how he meets his end to a woman feels a bit like justice. LOL 😏

Then I also wonder about Eärien. She was created for the show so they can do whatever they want with her and it makes me wonder if she ends up being one of the 9 too, especially since she's in a relationship with Kemen. It'd be a twist as the only female ringbearer we know of is Galadriel, so if this happens she would be the 2nd. Plus, if Kemen turns out to be the Witch King she would be his queen. Which then brings up in a way what Sauron wanted with Galadriel and that 2 of the men ringbearers would be a couple. I would really like this twist and knowing how Tolkien did write a lot of things happening twice in different ways, and it would be tragic for Elendil's family though as she'll become a Ringwraith, while her father and brothers not only save some of the Faithful but start the line that leads to Aragorn.

So I do think they are 3 of the 9, and that leaves 6 more to be revealed which could be some of the minor roles but I think others will be new actors added. 😀