#and a nice walk in closet
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Local girl deciding to live an apartment not this school year but the next, local girl has looked at every apartment building in her city and decided on her top 3 with numerous back up options
#top choice is above a domino's!#and has in unit laundry which is nice being disabled#and a nice walk in closet#its also across the street from current dorm so still close enough to campus to make walking easy enough#its close to the couple major bus stops id use so i can use those on bad hip days#choice 2 is a little further but same area#and choice 3 is a 20 minute walk but there is a bus stop and its insanely close to grocery store#its also got a cool balcony#actively avoiding the urge to pull up top choice and see if there is a balcony#my top choice is also the cheapest of the 3!
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31!
31: are you messy or organized?
#i also have a hard time organizing things in a way that ill be able to remember where i put everything months later orz#i try to keep important stuff where theyre visible so i can see them easily even if they fade into the background#but sometimes ill put stuff away and forget exactly where and its such a pain in the ass#though it doesnt make it too hard to walk around in my room.. i save a lot of space with my loftbed and closet#but it would be nice to make room for new stuff when i learn to let go of old stuff. sigh#ask#ask game#answered#yapping#doodles
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he‘s so…!!!!!!!
#he recognised me when i walked past him on the street this morning 🥺#he was so fucking nice again ughghhhg 😭😭😭😭😭#also can i just say. props to me for having a steady hand this time!! and i wasn’t talking nonsense!! i used real words and actual grammar!#geoffrey streatfeild#tsfs#also the play was SO. FUCKING. CAMP.#incredible#and once again he played a gay man without realising it (while being the most un-camp person on stage)#'sir peter‘s in the closet' YEAH HE SURE IS#peter/oliver? yeah they were a thing#good night#ALSO i‘m glad i‘m not the only one who has tilted cap syndrome#thank you sir for validating my struggle 🫡🙏#my face
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Applying to an apartment with little income and terrible credit score, in hopes that they'll be desperate enough to take me
#im not even getting my hopes up for this one folks#but this same company rook me when i had no rental history so maybe?#unlikely for the aforementioned piss poor income and credit score#im just praying they remember me feom when i used to rent from them and liked me enough then to take me again#the bathroom is not in the apartment btw#that's the wildest thing. like its a basic studio with a kitchen closet and main area#but you have to go across the hall. to the private bathroom#im hoping they realize that thats wild and give me the apartment#i neeeeed to leave my parents house. and i really miss that city the apartment is in#i wish there was a little essay section where i could tell the landlord how much i like the city#and that ill get a better job once i live there and my parents are going to pay my first month and security deposit#that would be nice#i applied knowing that i won't get it but also knowing that i cant get it if i dont try#mostly i just miss that city#there was a really nice coffee shop within walking distance of my apartment#(the apartment i applied to is next door to the building i used to live in so same area which is great)#but i didnt have wifi so i would go there a lot to do work. it was so cozy in the winter especially#and i went on a lot of walks. so i wiuld swing by there and grab a drink to sip on my walk#and it was literally within sight of a great lake. a literal great lakw of Michigan lol#i loved walking along the lake on a nice day. or a windy day and just watch the waves crash#and my favorite band is feom that city so i got to see so many of their performances. and theyre a small band so the most i ever paid#was $50 and that was for the vip package. i saw them for $10 once. and free once. and $50 for the vip#its a big art and music city and i love it so much. i miss it so fucking much and i regret leaving#but at least it made me realize that no other city is for me. that city is my home#oh and it was literally right next to a bug beautiful library that i loved to wander. i still have my library card from there#mostly used it to print stuff and you have to pay at the box next to the printer. and one time i forgot to pay. i still feel bad about that#but i dont want to reminisce too much cuz i know i wont get it#im trying to pay off my credit cards to bring up my credit score but its slow going#its much nearer my gf and all my friends so i would love to live near them. rn im hours away from about everyone i love#i ran out of tags. maybe pray for me if you pray? or just hope for me. i dont want to let myself want this but its there
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Big open spaces are the devil. Nooks and crannies are my friends.
#closets. under sinks. in between the small space of the bed and desk. under the desk.#these are some of the lovely places i hide when i feel an anxiety attack coming in or when i get too scared of the open room#idk if its a helpful coping mechanism but it does make me feel more safe#i dont like it when i think people might walk in and see me#also the shivers are worse btw for those of u that remember my disaster virginity losing escapades#im not thinking abt it as much since im on vacay which is nice. but ive started to shiver and twitch in temore general anxious thoughts#*in response to
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had the craziest nightmare today. hit every nightmare genre and added a new one just for me
#timothy's txts.#late getting off my break at work for my worst manager BUT at the worst place i worked#walked into my manager in a meeting with EVERY head person in our district and they all chided me for being late and told me to hurry and#then i couldn’t find my apron#and then the street turned into a riot with cars being targeted by rockets and pedestrians being. also hit by rockets ?#this lady and i were by each other and we were like well normally we wouldn’t steal these motorbikes (they were hot pink though and swag as#hell) and then we started trying to escape but my seat was too high so i couldn’t drive safely#eventually we made it to her house with a small group of my coworkers / friends#and then a coworker i really liked got targeted and killed bc of me and the killers were shouting my name and hunting me down#so i go inside this lady’s house and it’s huge and honestly really nice#and i’m like hey do you have a toolbox PLEASE i need an alan wrench to lower the seat so i can drive safely and get away#and she was like yeah second floor#i asked which room? give me a landmark of the room so i don’t search every one#and she said it’s directly on the landing you can’t miss it#i go upstairs (the people hunting me in a red minivan have pulled up to her house and are suspiciously pulling all around it and backing up#and looking in the windows and i don’t know if this lady would sell me out) and ITS A TOY HOUSE. ???!??? not a toolbox…#so i’m searching but the people come in so i’m running through rooms and being quiet and make my way down to the basement that connects to#the garage and look desperately for a fucking alan wrench and they’re getting closer and i go through a small closet and there’s a trap door#and i go in there where there’s another hidden door and i finally get to the garage#and i find a tool box and decide to write the lady a note thanking her and telling her why i left so quickly#but all the papers i find are filled with scary notes and i’m wondering why they make me so uneasy#until i realize they’re notes that were written to Me from. a guy who really fucked me up#and one of them says ‘trans hot’ and i literally go :( i don’t want to be trans hot…#<- specifically from him because of the issues.#and then i realize that he’s the one hunting me down to Get me (the red van was irl his family’s car lmao)#and i’m panicking in an increasing amount and i won’t be able to get to the motorbike and escape with my coworkers and friends#and then my sibling woke me up asking if i wanted a breakfast sandwich or pancakes. so. crazy dream to have at nine in the morning#ask to tag
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apartment hunting has been a disaster stop trying to make walk in closets happen
#the one we saw this morning was so nice then boom the most bizarre master bedroom#there was a column right in the middle ot the wall where you’d put the tv and they tried to make a walk in closet by putting a wall#a meter away from the bathroom door why would you do that!!! you made a cave !!!!! did we all go insane!!!!!
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ran into my 8th grade teacher today and she apparently kept all the cat-related gifts I gave her (which I don't remember doing at all) and is living her dream as a journalist so. that was nice. :)
#charlie babbles#also me and her mom chatted about my mom and copd and caretaking stuff which was also nice#friend and I went to applefest so I wouldn't have to walk there because I walked too mich this week and burned out#I didnt want to keep her there too long so I just glanced at everything and bought mom a plant#now Im wishing I took more time and got myself something but I had fun anyway!#found my mom a free free-standing closet also
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,
#spent hours on craigslist this morning looking at apartments in [redacted city] and i found a little semi-studio that's really cute#and im kind of obsessed#even though the kitchen is probably even more poorly laid out than my current one#but there are some cute details i loved and now i'm laser-focused on it i drew it on graph paper and placed all my furniture and art#im being loony.... it's not even THAT cheap for the size and there's not exactly a scarcity of apartments in this city#but you walk in to the living room which has a really cute [now defunct] fireplace with dark green tile#and to one side is a 'bedroom' that's more like a sunroom there's an open doorway flanked by open backless shelves#the sunroom is just wide enough for a queen-sized bed to be tucked in along one wall and the facing wall is a closet with cubbies above#up to the ceiling#the long wall is all windows#it's just sexyyyyy i like it#i have a really nice little design for the fireplace
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it's a shitty night tonight and I am handling it horribly 😎
#just finished sobbing on my closet floor lol#went shopping w/ parents and had to walk around in heat and humidity and it was terrible#my legs were hurting my back was hurting it was fucking hot out and i was pissed#got some nice stuff but spent the entire ride home trying to drown everything out#especially being surrounded by ultra right assholes#now locked myself in my room trying to ignore everything my parents say/listen to#im sick of staying in my room all the time but there's no way in hell im leaving and having to hear everything#plus they're gonna talk to me about it and i am not in the mindset to deal with anything rn#like FUCK#how much longer do i have to live like this i hate it i hate it i hate it#ALSO ive been an Adult for like 2 weeks and it's just now hitting me that i am not ready for it#so yeah add that to the tally list#plenty of other things going on in my brain but this is getting long#probably wont post this but maybe i will#gotta get this out of my head but im angry and exhausted and scared out of my mind#hey maybe ill actually use tumblr as a diary and post the aftermath of a breakdown#venting yippee#tw vent#feel free to keep scrolling
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i went to an open house the other day for funzies and while walking around the house i was like WOW LOOK AT THESE SHELVES and WOW LOOK AT THESE NICE WOODEN FLOORS and WHOA LOOK HOW BIG THE LAUNDRY ROOM IS and my brother was like idk if you know this but usually people don't talk this much during open houses
#uhhhh me#sorry i'm easily impressed or whatever#for the record the house had really nice wooden floors#AND really nice sconces and chandeliers#AND each bedroom had an en suite bathroom AND walk-in closet#the house looked the same size as my house so i don't understand how they have so many washrooms and walk-in closets#it was literally less than a minute walk from my house so i was like. what if we just moved here LMAO#the backyard doesn't get a lot of light tho so that's really the biggest drawback#good for if you want a shady yard (it would be so perfect for summer bbq parties and such)#but not if you want a nice garden#veggie garden specifically. i'm sure plenty of flowers can grow in shade
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this is crazy do flipflop wearers develop a damn callous between their toes or am i just pussy
#@16 yr old me you dont wear flipflops. why do u think EYE wear fucking flip flops.#gorgeous couple of pairs i got from kenya have simply been sitting in the closet and its nice out . went for walk even#i have foot tattoos they need to see the sun but this is crazy
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I talk a lot of shit about how unnecessarily large the houses are in the US and how wasteful it is...but I'll admit that when you grow up with that it can be a bit difficult to adjust to the lack of space in European homes.
#my last apartment in the US had a WALK IN CLOSET#and it wasn't even an especially fancy apartment#that's unheard of here#even my parents' house here#which is pretty nice by Irish standards#doesn't have that
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Guys cn u remind me to clean my room tomorrow its pretty bad
#really bad.....#i cant walk on bare floor in over half of my small closet room#i need to get rid of clothes. its so hard i always get stuff given to me hand me downs from cousins and im like hey!#thats nice! il try wearing it. and then things pile up and i dont wear any of it cuz its on the floor and dirty cuz i dont do laundry enough#my mental health has really not been the greatest.
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AAAAAHAHAHAHHAAA I'M GETTING AN APARTMENT SITUATION SET UP SOON
#marzi speaks#my next-year roommates called me after class today to tell me abt the place they found and omg it's so nice#so many fucking amenities. for only like $700 per person#QUEEN BEDS. 4 BATHROOMS EACH WITH A TUB. WALK IN CLOSETS#FULLY FURNISHED. SMART TV INCLUDED. ELECTRONIC LOCKS AND DEADBOLTS ON EVERY BEDROOM DOOR#the one catch is that ur not guaranteed the ppl u request for your roommates#but since we're gonna apply asap there's almost no chance of that being an issue for us
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I also got a bloody nose while waiting in line at macys and i was sniffling tryna get thru the transaction and sat on the bench holding tissue to my nose, blood on my face cause i had to hold my nose with my palm at one point and got it on my face while my mom went to find tissue or something and it made me so tired and dizzy i almost threw up and almost fell over in another store and ended my day with 15min left in the mall where in which i had to sit down and accept defeat
#sorry if it sounds kinda whiney#but like this is my blog my diary so i get to be#but also like i treasure a good mall day with my mom its just like my fave thing#and it went exactly how i didnt want it to go#and my dehydrated little brain fried itself when i had to deviate from my plan and routine#like we always go to f21 and go to the top floor to look at clearence and everyone mumbled aroune the ground floor#and in my head i was like no!! we arent following the rules!! stop!! this isnt how you properly go to the mall!#im not gonna get an A in going to the mall which is normal to want and achive#and then we went into hot topic which is thr size of a large book closet and my cousi. walked near me and was like ur still here?#girl what do you mean im still here we've only been in here 20min im in the other corner 15 steps away from you#also the cashier lady at macys somehow knew my last name? even tho i didnt give an email or a phone number to my reccolection?#she handed me my stuff as i was on the phone with my mom being like hey pls find tissues asap and she saif have a nice day miss last name#and it threw me off but i was preoccupied trying not to have an bloody nose in the macys since the one on friday was horrendous#and it was all dripping down the back of my throat i ended up spitting it out in the thrashcan by the exit#but like how did she know? cause i have the like point account but i didnt give it to her does my card info popup on screen?#is my card like linked somehow and i popped up that way idk it was weird#but i got a v e r y nice shirt for 10 bucks#i did give her my zipcode so maybe that?
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