#and a lot of the other mentors were VERY skipped over

[sjofn-lofnsdottr]

I agree with a lot of this, except ...

It's skipped over part of what Hythlodeus tells you:

Emet-Selch isn't betraying the Ancients or their customs, in my opinion, because their culture depends very heavily on the Convocation and its decisions for how to proceed with shit like this, and they decided as a group on a plan to snuff out part of this new life to bring those sacrificed back. Some non-Convocation people objected, yes ... but as we learn, they were a minority. A small minority.

Emet-Selch is essentially doing what the Convocation and by extension the surviving Ancients were very much on board with, although it's taking even longer to actually do because it has the added steps of shoving the world back into one whole, now. Where he's wrong about the Ancients is just much simpler: the Ancients were not as perfect and good as he remembers. I'd argue he's living up to what they actually were , and doing exactly what an Ancient would expect him to be doing. Hubris is present pretty much every Ancient we meet, and those who lack that particular quality instead seem to have a strong desire to help with whatever I Alone Can Fix This plan their friend/mentor/etc has come up with, regardless of how good an idea it actually is.

I do like to think the ones who sacrificed themselves to restore life to the star were not thinking or hoping they'd be brought back, though, that it was in fact an act of altruism and goodness. I do like to think they would've objected to the Convocation's plan as well, let alone the Unsundered's modification of it. To sacrifice worlds of people to bring them back can definitely be seen as betrayal of those specific Ancients. And I suspect deep down Emet-Selch knows it, and is struggling to rectify that contradiction: he doesn't want to disrespect their act, but he also doesn't want them lost and forgotten in what an Ancient would see as a fate worse than death. In his eyes, they are too good to be left to such a fate. He's in charge of the Underworld, and those sacrificed belong there, to eventually be reborn, not in the limbo they're trapped in. He wants them to be able to return to the star, when they choose to do so, like every other Ancient does when their duty is done.

Basically, I agree he's performing a betrayal ... but it's not betraying his entire people or his entire culture. It's betraying the Ancients who may have been as good and altruistic as he claims they all are, because he can't bear to see them be 'punished' for that goodness.

one thing I find neat about Emet-Selch is that his chauvinism is so intense that it actually prevents him from making the strongest possible case for the unique moral goodness of the ancients, and that this same mental distortion ties into his classic final fantasy need to turn into a Horrible Final Form Monstrosity for your final fight

(for my part I think any minor unique moral goodness the ancients possess they have due to their status as demigods living in eden before the fall. even if they really are morally/intellectually/spiritually/magically/etc. superior to every modern eorzean on a 1:1 level it still doesn't change anything because 1) they are mythical and impossible, that's the whole point and 2) even if they weren't, they still have no particular claim to existence that is superior to anyone else's, no matter how good they are. but the point here is the case Emet-Selch is trying to make, which is that they are more "worthy" of life.)

when he's setting you up for the final amaurot sequence, Emet-Selch hits you with this one:

it's a solid line! stops the party cold for a second.

it's also...not that impressive. do I think if we called a big world meeting that half of everyone would just jump up to be chosen? maybe, maybe not. but, sorry: we're having a big world meeting? are we also demigods with their every material need fulfilled in this version? do we have a one world government that almost everyone seems to fully trust telling us that it knows for real a way to stop the meteor heading towards earth? because honestly i think as soon as we start creating structural similarities like that, it becomes a lot more likely. and every step you take towards making the comparison happen on level ground makes the idea that the ancients were possessed of some unique moral fiber that made them capable of this sacrifice (as opposed to the undeniable abilities in magic and global governance that actually enabled it) seem less and less likely.

and especially if you consider it in the context of what actual people are like. human (and presumably eorzean) history is replete with examples of people sacrificing themselves to save others, even though none of us are immortal wizard philosophers. i don't know how the white-room thought-experiment "will half of you die to save the others???" turns out. but do i think, across a grand rolling catastrophe, that half our population would sacrifice itself to save the other half in a million individual acts of sacrifice to save a parent, a child, a lover, a friend, a stranger? that seems significantly more plausible. altruism and sacrifice for others is even pretty frequent in animals! it's not a very unique moral behavior!

(stanford encyclopedia of philosophy on biological altruism)

but that's not the only sacrifice the ancients made. roll the tape, hythlodaeus!

...Yet oh how the star had suffered. So many species lost. The land was blighted, the waters poisoned, and even the wind had ceased to blow. Once more did our people give of themselves to Zodiark. Another half of our race sacrificed to cleanse the world; to ensure that trees and grasses and myriad tiny lives would sprout and grow and flourish.

(every time I read this speech and hit the ff1/3/5 ref about the land and waters and wind i become mylongestyeahboyever.avi)

this is the step beyond, and it's what separates the ancients from modern humans. they viewed themselves as stewards of the star and really meant it; whatever other criticisms you might level, you can't doubt the depths of their commitment. and this i think really does make them morally distinct from modern people, or at least raises that possibility in a much more compelling way than the first sacrifice. half of the living population sacrificing itself not in a moment of duress and apocalypse but in a moment of calm? when the sacrifice isn't for anything but plants and animals and some tiny proto-eorzeans? that kind of cold, calculated, long-term altruism, aimed at people and living beings that are nothing like you...that does feel like something a little more unique, more worth preserving. even in just the text of the game, we can say with real certainty that the ancients were at least more capable of facing their problems and had greater moral integrity and care for the world than, say, the people who made ra-la.

but emet-selch can't ever say that because rejecting and dishonoring the decision the ancients made as stewards of the star is his primary goal.

like, "my people were uniquely morally good. half the living population sacrificed themselves not for their loved ones or for the survival of their people but simply for the world. for the trees and grasses and the wind and the water. for the humblest insects and for the summer breeze and the tides." that fucks! damn, you got me there! i watch enough people throw aluminum cans in the trash on a weekly basis that i find this sincerely moving and beyond the seeming abilities of my own brethren! oh no, i'm being persuaded by the fascist immortal space wizard!

"and therefore, because they are uniquely morally good, we are going to sacrifice and kill the very things they gave their lives to save, so we can have them back :)" well, shit. i'm experiencing some dissonance here.

but you can't actually lie to yourself as long as emet-selch without distorting your understanding of the truth. you cannot choose to see the world falsely half the time and clearly the other half. in committing to self-deceit and willful ignorance regarding the value of the modern world, emet-selch blinds himself not just to the world as it is but to the ancients as they were. if he could describe accurately the ways in which the ancients were genuinely noble and benevolent, he would also have to able to see clearly how he has entirely deviated from that ideal. and he cannot do that and stay on the path he has chosen, so he simply chooses not to see things accurately.

i cannot help but link this blindness of his to his trial. here, at what seems to emet-selch to be the last stand of the ancients, he says to you "to be clear this fight IS a metaphor, and in that metaphor i stand in for the Entire Unsundered World."

and yet, in standing against you, he betrays both the customs of the ancients and his very title, itself a direct signifier of the mission he was charged with as one of the convocation of fourteen: "to ensure that all is right in creation, that our star may know a brighter future." contra elidibus, for whom remembering his duty to the ancients is one and the same act as remembering his name, emet-selch declares his own to be mere pretense. and that's before we even reach the matter of his transformation.

emet-selch believes the only way he can save the ancients is to betray their principles, forget their greatest triumphs, and abandon their trappings. he renounces almost everything of the ancients, save for his pale and sad and faceless amaurot, in the hopes of bringing them back.

i am reminded a little of borges's three versions of judas, a short story which uses the lens of fictional literary criticism (appropriate for a story as interested in competing narrative interpretations as shadowbringers is) to recast the betrayal of christ by judas not as the greatest of sins but as the greatest of sacrifices.

The ascetic, for the greater glory of God, vilifies and mortifies his flesh; Judas did the same with his spirit. He renounced honor, morality, peace and the kingdom of heaven, just as others, less heroically, renounce pleasure. With terrible lucidity he premeditated his sins.

and, in turn, the sardonic footnote to that very same line, which unsettles that sentiment as soon as it has been presented:

Borelius inquires mockingly: “Why didn’t he renounce his renunciation? Or renounce the idea of renouncing his renunciation?”

[scarlct-vvitch]

if no one else will say it i will. the ballad of songbirds and snakes should have been split into two movies

[oatmealwrites]

Catch Kira, NOT Feelings! Ch.1

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

L x Fem!Reader

Part 2

Ch.1 is finallllly done LMAO. This is probably gonna be a medium-long fic but I haven't quite decided yet so buckle up. Eventually some NSFW in later chapter but relative slow burn at the start.

word count: 5.1k

Synopsis:

As a graduate criminology student, you're more than ecstatic to jump at your mentor's offer to join the task force chasing down Kira. Mr. Yagami has prepared you for a successful career in the law and justice system, but with the public disappointment in the police's inability to catch Kira, finding a well paying job will be difficult. But a recommendation letter from L would open doors you can't even imagine. It's simple, you just have to catch Kira... NOT feelings.

Masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

(Post time skip 1 - Aka Light in university now & helping the investigation. Just after ukita death)

November 4 -

You shift your weight from leg to leg inside the elevator, rehearsing your introduction and replaying the instructions from Mr. Yagami over and over again. The red LEDs indicate a higher and higher floor of the hotel and each second feels like an eternity passing.

“You’ll be fine Y/N. I’ve already worked it out with the task force, there’s no unnecessary expectation of you.”

You turn to Mr. Yagami and let out a slow exhale, feeling the pressure leave your lungs but the weight remaining on your shoulders.

“I know, it’s just big shoes to fill. Only the best are working with L to catch Kira.”

“Well Matsuda joined right away,” he replies, a small smirk on his lips, “If that makes you feel any better.”

You look down at your shoes and let out a light laugh, you’ve worked with Matsuda before. Interning under the Chief before he left the police force created lots of opportunities to work with lots of different officers. Matsuda was always one of your favorites.

“Ha, it kinda does. But he’s loyal and committed to the case-,”

“You are too. Don’t sell yourself short. I went through the interview with you regarding the risks in finding Kira and have seen your analysis take down a variety of other criminals. You have great potential to be an officer.”

Mr. Yagami gives you a paternal smile and his eyes hold nothing but honesty, “I’m glad to have you on this task force. I mean it.”

“Thank you,” a grateful tone leaves your lips and you can’t help but feel better at his compliments. It was a reassurance you needed to hear.

The elevator dings softly and the metal doors slide open with Mr. Yagami extending his arm over the sensor to allow your exit before his. As you step onto the plush carpet of the expensive hotel floor, a feeling of guilt washes over you. Mr. Yagami leads the way down the hall and you follow in silence, still comparing yourself to the other members of the task force.

While yes you were determined to catch Kira, the reasoning behind it wasn’t all about morality. To be honest you almost agreed with Kira at first - a new world where people who did wrong actually got punished compared to the slow and tedious bureaucratic pace of justice was appealing. Though after the killings of petty criminals and FBI agents, the resonance of Kira’s message faded to one of selfishness.

Though maybe I’m not much better. Truth be told, catching Kira was a priority for you ethically, but so were the very extensive benefits it offered. Being a graduate student in criminology and psychology there were very few jobs you could pursue upon graduation. That, combined with the over public disappointment in the very justice system you were about to work in, made finding a secure and well paying job almost impossible. But, if you could catch Kira and get a recommendation from someone like L on your CV? The possibilities would be endless.

The heel of your shoes has a muffled ‘click’ on the carpet as you walk behind Mr. Yagami and eventually reach a door near the end of the halfway. Almost no other room doors were present on this entire half of the hall, indicating this room was extremely large and extremely expensive to rent out.

Yagami gives you a small smile of encouragement and knocks a specific pattern before scanning a plastic room card and turning the knob. There’s a glow from the overhead ceiling lights that pour out of the room and into the hallway along with several hushed voices chatting just out of sight.

“I think we should review the – “

“Sshh.. I think Chief is back.”

You follow Mr. Yagami past the room entrance and enter what seems to be a penthouse hotel suite living room scattered with papers and boxes alike. A group of men stand around the coffee table and pause when you and Mr. Yagami walk further into the room.

Matsuda catches your eye and instantly smiles, “Woa, Y/N! I didn’t realize you were going to join us!-”

His expression is cut short when another man smacks him lightly on the back of the head, “Idiot! Wasn’t the first thing that L said to do was not reveal any names?”

Your eyes widen. These guys are serious.

Matsuda looks up at the man in worry and then at you apologetically, “Ah I’m sorry,” he scratches the back of his head sheepishly, “I didn’t mean to put you at risk there.”

You smile lightly and Mr. Yagami walks further into the room to pick up a few papers and scan them over, interested in what the group was working on before you two had arrived. “It’s fine Aizawa, L already cleared us all of being Kira. The only issue would be if Y/N was.”

The statement holds no threat of you actually being Kira but it’s enough to make you feel uneasy and the other members shift awkwardly. Has one of them already been suspected of being Kira? No way… not a member of the police surely?

You snap out of your thoughts and give a light bow to the group, “Hi everyone. My name is Y/N and I’m excited to join you all in the investigation to catch Kira. Let’s work well together.”

The group softens and smiles at your introduction and one by one introduces themself briefly. You already knew Matsuda, the man who scolded him was named Aizawa, and the tall man who was quietly skimming papers was named Mogi.

“This is a small group. You weren’t kidding Mr. Yagami when you said only the most committed are involved.” The statement has a light-hearted joke sense to it but no one moves to laugh.

Mogi shifts his weight awkwardly, “Well.. we actually lost a member, Ukita, not too long ago. Kira killed him.”

SHIT. You want to die right then and there. Kira if you can read my thoughts please strike me down too.

“Oh! Im so sorry I didn’t know-”

“It’s alright Y/N. We purposely keep super tight lips about everything and all our members. It makes sense you didn’t realize. But I hope this serves as a reminder of the gravity of the situation at hand. If you aren’t willing to die for this cause, I recommend you turn away now. You’re still young and have a lot of life ahead of you.”

You turn to Mr. Yagami and blink before shaking your head. A life ahead of me? I have no other career paths and no way to climb and earn a livable wage without doing this. I need this case and this recommendation.

“No- I want to do this. I want to be here. I want to catch Kira.”

The group’s tension dissipates and they all turn their attention back to the coffee table and it’s papers.

“Here,” Mogi starts, handing you a manila folder, “Watari dropped these off earlier. We should get started with the most Kira clues.”

You take the folder gently and sit on the edge of the armrest of the couch, skimming through the papers until a set of photographs tumble out. Gently closing the folder you reach down to retrieve the photos, only hesitating when you see the subject. Prisoner suicide notes.

Carefully you flip through each photo, quietly trying to take it all in. There’s four photos in total each numbered in the corner:

A male prisoner had stabbed himself in the cafeteria with a knife. His suicide note written on the back: “Theives deserve their punishment”

A male prisoner who was beaten to death in the prison yard. He had left a note in his cell: “Dead ends everywhere”

A male prisoner hanging himself with a note in blood on the wall behind him “The victims deserve justice”

A female prisoner who had jumped from the roof. Her suicide note written on the back: “Are you watching, L?”

You examine the photos and their suicide notes for a few minutes, your brows furrowed in focus. At first you lean over to the coffee table and place them all note-side up; after a moment you flip them over to show the images. A bead of sweat drips down the side of your face and you bite the edge of your thumb nail without realizing.

Before you can properly go through the rest of the contents of the folder, Matsuda speaks up, “Oh the photos? Those have stumped me all morning. But-!” He leans down to flip the images once again. He places them in the order 3,1,4,2. “In this order they say something. “The. Thieves. Are. Dead.”

You nod and look up at Matsuda, “Yes, in this order we can assume Kira is trying to convey a message to us.”

Something isn’t right; this feels off somehow.

You release the nail from your teeth and shake your head, eyes never leaving the images, “Yes we could, but it wouldn’t make any sense. Are all of these inmates thieves? Or is Kira referring to someone else?”

Matsuda looks at you wide-eyed and a bit embarrassed, “Oh, in the folder it mentions two of them were murderers now that you mention it..”

No, there’s something else wrong here.

You keep staring at the images, “it’s strange Kira would leave such a vague message with such a group. Mr. Yagami already informed me how Kira did his tests about the actions leading up to a death, so writing these notes would have some significance. But..”

You gently lift the images again, this time studying the attire of each inmate in the photos. “Each person is from a different jail. Their clothing and health state indicates they weren’t in the same prison system.”

Mogi leans over and shrugs, letting out a soft sigh, “why does that matter? Kira has killed from nearly every jail in the country at this point.”

You meet his gaze for a moment, “I mean this work is kinda sloppy. It’s obvious he didn’t do proper research on each prison.”

Mogi opens his mouth in slight shock, waiting for you to elaborate. You tilt your head and survey the image of the deceased female inmate, your eyes lingering on the background building of the prison. Without missing a beat you lift the photo to Mogi, “I mean this jail is only one floor. If you jumped 3.5m (11.5ft) maybe you’d break your ankle.” You stare at the image of the woman’s distorted body, “Not 4 ribs, both kneecaps, and skull.”

Mr. Yagami stares at the images over your shoulder in a mix of disbelief and awe; he places his hand on your shoulder supportively. Matsuda lets out a light gasp and takes the photo of the woman and looks at it incredulously with an audible ‘woa’.

You look up from the table and then at Mr. Yagami, “Are there any other fake Kira photographs in this pile?”

Before the chief can answer a voice rings out from the connecting bedroom door that is now swung open, “Naturally all of them were doctored for this test. But nice work Y/N. You solved that faster than I was expecting.”

The entire group turns to face him and you find yourself raising to your feet in respect. L.

Your eyes drift up and latch onto his; almost in a trance. Dark disheveled hair seemed to splay in every direction, covering where his eyebrows would be, and his awful posture rounded his back forward. His deep gray eyes and purple bags from lack of sleep contrasted the paleness of his skin. Rather than professional attire, baggy denim jeans hung low on his hips and an oversized henley draped his frame. He shifted his weight from side to side waiting for your response.

Any words paused in your mouth as you drank in the appearance of the man in front of you. Half of you was awestruck to see the famous detective you’ve only heard stories of in person; the other half was mentally scolding yourself to set some higher standards.

Maybe it’s because you spent too much time around men with pensions and none your own age. Yea. That’s it.

The bar really is in hell huh.

You swallowed any stupid remarks and extended your hand to him, “It’s nice to meet you, L.”

L looked at your hand apprehensively and slowly reached forward to complete the shake. The look on his face made it seem like he was forcing himself to shake your hand and only resolved into doing so just to be polite. Jerk. It’s not like my hands are dirty.

“Well, now that introductions are formally over, I have some other details on the Kira case I would like us to focus our attention on.”

L sauntered further into the room and slid the manila folder with the test photos and information to the side. Then, seemingly out of nowhere, a senior-aged man appeared with a rolling cart containing paper boxes filled with miscellaneous files on the bottom and an arrangement of desserts and coffee cups on the top.

With a whisper of ‘thanks’, you gently lifted a mug from the cart and blew some steam away from the rim, lips hovering the ceramic. While L and Mr. Yagami began separating some of the files, you took a seat on the couch next to Matsuda, giving him a light elbow in the side.

“Hey, did you know that was a test?” You whispered.

Matsuda looked at you wide eyed, “What? No way! Ryuzaki never tells me anything when he plans stunts like that!”

You raise an eyebrow and turn to look at everyone else in the room, “Ryuzaki..?”

Your eyes stop when they meet L’s, who was staring at you as if he was involved in the conversation from the beginning. You avert your gaze awkwardly and turn your attention back to the warm mug in your hands, cheeks slightly warm. Most people look away when they get caught staring…

“My apologies for any confusion. I’ve told the group they can call me Ryuzaki or L during this investigation. Given that we know Kira needs a name and face to kill, it only makes sense.”

Mogi shifts in his seat with a slight tick in his eyebrow and mumbles lowly, “Yea as if you didn’t already know everything about us though.”

You turn to the man and then back at L, or Ryuzaki, or whoever, noticing the tension in the room.

“Ah I see.” You say lightly, trying to progress the conversation and go back to the main objective at hand.

With prolonged silence now hanging over everyone, you reach forward to grab two small sugar cubes and place them into your coffee before taking a sip. In your peripherals you can see Ryuzaki watching every movement of your hands but never saying anything. This time when you lock eyes he turns away first.

Mr. Yagami lets out a slight cough and begins passing folders out to everyone, “Alright enough small talk, these folders contain some of the tapes the Second Kira had sent to the news stations. Let's split into teams and see what we can cover.”

Placing the mug on the coffee table, you reached forward to grab a folder and flip through the contents.

“Lets have Mogi and Mr. Yagami compare the DNA found in forensics to what we currently have in the database. Matsuda and Y/N, please look at the transcriptions and real Kira suicide notes to look for any irregularities. Aizawa, please extend our list of contacts to include radio broadcasters as well,” Ryuzaki takes the hangnail on his thumb between his teeth while speaking, “We don’t know if the Second Kira has made contact with Kira #1… but there’s a chance they may get desperate and try other outlets of communication if they haven’t already. I’ll be reviewing the 4 different outcome tapes on the television if anyone needs my assistance. Ok?”

There’s a unified “yes!” after he finished speaking, the small teams immediately breaking off into separate sections of the hotel room.

You sit at the kitchen table of the vast suite, skimming your hands over various transcriptions, each one describing an unyielding obligation to the cause of Kira. You tilt your head and furrow your brows between the two documents in your hands.

“Hey Matsuda?”

“Hmm?”

“These two are completely different in terms of voice, grammar, everything..”

Matsuda looks up from his own set of papers and leans in over your shoulder, letting out an awkward laugh, “Oh I should have said this earlier- we actually wrote some of them pretending to be Kira in order to get the Second Kira talking. Why don’t we pile up the ones the team made and focus only on ones from Second Kira.”

Your mouth formed a small ‘O’ at his statement before nodding. Matsuda skims through the files, deftly collecting the papers of which the task force had authored into a neat pile and sliding you a different stack of notes to analyze. This time the stack included the real Kira authored suicide notes. You mutter a ‘thanks’ and go back to your position hovering over the table and straining your neck. For some reason you can’t shake the feeling of wanting to analyze the ones against the transcription the task force had authored. Just focus. You let out a breath and get to work.

****

After what seems like a few hours the group is called back into the main living room to discuss everyone’s progress. Mr. Yagami stands first, “Well the DNA on all the videotapes matches each other. It’s definitely the same person sending these.”

Mogi rubs his hand on the back of his neck with some frustration, “The DNA is in the police database; not for a criminal record but one regarding a victim of a crime. It may take some time before we can get approval to unseal the records… But at least we will know for sure who our suspect is within a few days; a week at max!”

The group hums with energy at the lead and Ryuzaki takes the nail of his thumb in between his lips again turning his attention to you.

Matsuda stands and points to a few lines on the paper, “We noticed a particular line about ‘showing notebooks in Aoyama’. It’s out of place and might be an indication that the Second Kira wants to use this as a meeting place.”

Ryuzaki nods and shuts his eyes, “I was thinking the same thing.. Now if there’s nothing else-”

“Wait.”

Ryuzaki opens his eyes and turns his attention back to you and Matsuda looks down with a slight puzzled expression.

You pick at your nails in nervousness for a moment and look at the group, “I don’t want to jump to any conclusions here but I noticed some similarities in the actual Kira suicide notes and the transcript you all had made..”

Mr. Yagami’s face pales and he stutters a few words out before Ryuzaki lifts his hand without even looking to silence him. The hangnail now forgotten, he leans in over the armrest of the couch only inches away from your face, as if he wanted to study every detail.

“Really? That’s very interesting Y/N please continue your reasoning,” his voice is the most energetic you’ve heard it.

The proximity makes you instinctively lean back until he closes the distance so far you have no more room to move. Almost smelling the scent of sweet coffee on his breath you nervously exhale and lift both the task force written transcript and a suicide note from Kira.

“The wording on the on the Kira suicide notes are very egotistical to me. It’s taunting like he’s one step ahead and in a position of earned authority,” you then tilt your head to the scripted video, “and this mentions about bestowing forgiveness. It’s an uncannily similar voice to a person in a position of power looking down on the recipient.”

Ryuzaki leans in almost a millimeter closer before sinking back into his seat with an eerie smile on his face. You hesitate, not putting either document down and seemingly staring back into the trance of his eyes.

“Isn’t that good though? Your ability to write an extremely good dupe..?” You're barely whispering it to Ryuzaki with your entire focus on him. His eyes don’t leave yours, and it feels like this is an entire conversation between just the two of you.

“Oh I didn’t write that.”

For a moment your eyes widen and the illusion of a private conversation comes crashing down around you. Before you can part your lips for clarification Mr. Yagami’s voice booms out from across the coffee table, “Enough of this Ryuzaki! I thought you invited Light to this investigation for him to help us!”

Light?

You were well acquainted with the Yagami family, having spent nearly the same amount of time with them as your own household. Light was extremely intelligent, well spoken, and borderline perfect at everything he did; it makes sense Ryuzaki would want him working this case.

Though where was he? You scanned the room quickly from your seat. Oh yea, class. An unfortunate situation you could relate to, considering you had a 9am lecture tomorrow morning and it was already 8pm.

“I did invite him for his help. I just find Y/N’s observation extremely interesting. I’m aware this situation makes you uncomfortable, but having now a second person make a connection raises my suspicion of him to 10%.”

“He was writing that note while trying to sound like Kira. Don’t you think questioning him for doing his task well is a bit much?”

Your head was beginning to hurt. Light was a suspect of being Kira? It didn’t make any sense, surely there had to be a mistake. You turned your attention back to the conversation between Mr. Yagami and Ryuzaki, noting the intensity of fire in each of their eyes. They were being serious? I guess that makes sense as to why L wanted to test me when I first came in. And why the group seemed so uneasy at the earlier mention of one of them being Kira.

“You’ve probably filled in the gaps haven’t you?”

Your eyes shoot up to meet Ryuzaki’s, the distance between your faces short, but not nearly as close as he was earlier. Unconsciously, you lick your bottom lip with a slight stress on your face and nod slightly.

Mr. Yagami sighs and sinks into his seat, his head cradled by his left hand. The group looks around each other awkwardly and Ryuzaki lets out a sigh of exasperation which indicates they’ve all had this conversation before.

“Let’s take a slight reccess please? Y/N you should probably start heading home for your classes tomorrow.”

You look up at Mr. Yagami, and the group mumbles in agreement, slowly standing up and stretching.

“Nice work today rookie. Can’t wait to see what you figure out next,” Mogi says genuinely while placing a supportive hand on your shoulder.

You grin up at him and wave bashfully, it wasn’t like you solved the case. Yet. You could practically hear his recommendation letter now and the thought of it was enough to spark some energy.

As the group shuffled out to take either vending machine or smoke breaks, you noticed Ryuzaki staring at you while you slipped your jacket over your shoulders. He was usually staring at you anyways, but this one was different; before you could even raise an eyebrow he stood up and walked to the bedroom door. Glancing at you once before slipping inside.

With a quick scan of your surroundings to make sure no one was watching, you casually walked over to door and stepped inside as if it were the exit. The bedroom in question was barely a bedroom at all. A desk stacked with hundreds of papers sat by the window, bookshelves lined the walls, and the floor was littered with evidence boxes. The only thing that made it a bedroom was the king size bed made neatly and untouched against the wall jutting into the center of the room.

Ryuzaki was standing at the desk, digging through a box mumbling to himself about if ‘Watari had moved it’ before pulling out a small cellphone and turning to you.

“Ah, I’m glad you got my signal.”

Signal? He stared without blinking and then casually walked into another room. It wasn’t so much as following a signal as it was making sure he wasn’t having a stroke.

“Yea, is there something you wanted to speak about?”

Ryuzaki looked at the door and then motioned for you to come closer; which you obediently did without even a second guess. Only inches apart he studied your face again, “I’m glad you picked up on that note sounding a little too authentic. The very notion drives Mr. Yagami up the wall.”

You nod, “I mean it makes sense, it’s not exactly a light accusation.”

Ryuzaki follows your words and then twitches as if he were re-listening to them; only catching the joke on the third time through. A small smile cracks his face and he tilts his head to the side, “Yes I agree. Being accused of Kira is a heavy burden, especially considering the life in prison sentence or death penalty when caught.”

The air deflated out of you.

You suck in a breath defeated, “Yep.. so why exactly did you call me in here?”

“I needed to speak in private,” Ryuzaki gnaws at his bottom lip with his canines and then locks eyes with you again, “What I’m about to ask needs to remain between us.”

Immediately your eyes widen and heat rushes to your face. The proximity of him seems to magnify everything and a warm feeling began to brew in your lower abdomen. The low lighting of the room, the intimate whisper of his voice, and the large king bed in your peripheral skewed any assumption of what he was about to say next.

I need to go out and touch grass. Call some friends, go on a date, do something. This guy is a total weirdo and I’m standing here shaking like fucking teenager.

You nod, not wanting to even speak and risk the shakiness of your voice being heard by him.

“You go to the same school as Light, correct? I’d like you just to keep an eye on him while you’re both on campus if that’s alright.”

You look from one eye to the other, taking a moment to pause and reflect on his proposal. The length of your hesitation was enough to make L backtrack slightly, “If you’re uncomfortable with that I completely underst-”

“I’ll do it.”

His eyes widen and blink twice before a small smile breaks his lips again, “I’m glad. I don’t have much time to go to campus or classes anyways so it’ll be nice to have to monitor him while I stay here.”

You nod in understanding before double taking at his words, “Wait do you go there too?”

Ryuzaki now fiddles with the cellphone in hands, typing rapidly and not bothering to look up, “Hm? Oh yes I entered the school to keep track of Light, but I won’t need to follow him around there if you’re willing to help me.”

You swallowed, noting the way he casually mentioned going to the university you were initially rejected from as if you asked him the weather.

Before you can mumble anything under your breath, Ryuzaki gently takes your hand in his and flips it to be facing palm-up. With his hand still on your wrist, the other places a cellphone into the palm and he looks at you intently.

“It’s important to note that on the off-chance Light really is Kira, it means he’s willing to risk killing to protect himself. I have emergency belts for everyone, but I’d also like you to have this.”

His hand falls to his side after a moment of them lingering a beat too long and he takes half a step back; turning to face his desk but not looking at anything in particular.

You click a few buttons on the phone and notice the way he had already placed his contact information into the device. A small grin grazes your lips and you slip the phone into your back pocket, “This way I can text information without sending a SOS? Plus it probably looks more natural anyways.”

Ryuzaki turns back to you, his hands firmly at his sides like they weren't just around your own, “Exactly. Besides, Light will learn you work with us shortly and he’ll start being on guard. If he thinks that cellphone is your personal one, he won’t think twice about you using it in front of him casually.”

A wave of excitement washes over you, fieldwork was always your favorite and this felt like a borderline James Bond movie.

“You got it!”

Ryuzaki pulls out his own cellphone from his baggy denim pocket and begins typing into it, “I’ll have Watari drive you home tonight. Would you like an escort to class tomorrow?” His eyes briefly look into yours with an emotion that could almost be described as hope. Almost.

Instinctively you raise your hands, “No that’s alright. I can just take the metro.”

Ryuzaki nods curtly but you continue, “But if you can arrange a ride after my classes to here that would be nice.”

His eyes hold yours for a moment and he turns away to his desk, this time walking up to the wooden drawers and digging through them, “Alright. I’ll tell Watari, just send your course schedule when you have the moment.”

Ryuzaki never turns back around and after a few moments of an awkward silence you spin to leave the room without either of you saying a word. The weird intimacy of the moment left you feeling an emotion you couldn’t quite pin point.

After saying your goodnights to the group and following Watari to the black luxury Sedan in the parking lot, the image of a warm shower and snuggling into bed seemed to be calling your name. Shoes clicking on the ground, you slid into the seat of the opened passenger door Watari had opened and watched him walk around to get into the driver’s seat.

Quickly telling him your address you found yourself staring out the window and for a split second, seeing the figure of a man watching you from the penthouse suite you had just exited. But by the time you blinked he was gone; the only thing pulling you from your thoughts was the slight buzz from your back pocket of the phone Ryuzaki had given you.

Ryuzaki:

Please be careful tomorrow. Let me know if anything goes wrong.

[bonefall]

I LOVED hearing about the Ripwater episode!!!! Could you discuss whichever episode that would include Jayfeather‘s warrior training perhaps? If not I’d LOVE to hear about any other!

Jay's warrior training happens across lots of them! He only pivots to being a Cleric near the VERY end of the arc. He's considered fully trained after "saving" Hazeltail by secretly kicking Moleflight's ass.

Jaypaw -> Jayfang -> Jayfeather

Blackstar's Bog Project seems to be the conflict so far that's going to be featuring Jaypaw's training the most, though, the way that most of these episodes end up being centric for one of the three.

Jaypaw will be dominant in ShadowClan-related episodes because his first rival shows up here; Owlpaw, later called Owlclaw.

If you recognize that name, it's either because you know he's the secret brother of Kestrelflight and Harestar, or you remember that he's the father of Weaselkit and Happyface which causes familial problems within Violetshine's adopted family. Noteworthy recurring ShadowClan cat!

Head's up this one's way less organized than Ripwater's

Pre-Bog Project; The beginning of Jaypaw's apprenticeship Ableism and Longtail

Before Blackstar begins the bog project, I want there to be a decent amount of battle between ShadowClan and ThunderClan.

At the time, The Three are kits or young apprentices. For the most part, they're born into a world where they mostly know ShadowClan as this kinda distant, scary thing that the older warriors fight a lot.

When they become apprentices, it doesn't help that ShadowClan's presence is sharp. They have a very dry, dark sense of humor which can mask bullying. They cite the Warrior Code a lot and take blasphemy seriously. It's not always obvious when they mean what they say or if they're being sarcastic

This is especially bad with ThunderClan cats. Tawnypelt had a REALLY hard time adapting to this culture back in TNP.

there's one major fight Jaypaw takes part in between the two, as a young apprentice. Enter Owlpaw.

It's REALLY important that in this fight, Jaypaw gets his ass kicked.

Owlpaw is the third oldest lakeborn cat. He's big, mean, and vicious. He is a DIFFICULT opponent, he really is an Owl to a Jay at this point. Bad Bad Leroy Brown type shit

This curbstomp messes with Jaypaw baaaadly, shaking any confidence he'd gained in the short time where he's started training with Longtail.

When Jaypaw FIRST becomes the apprentice of Longtail... it wasn't actually welcome. Jaykit's ceremony was nearly delayed, as if Firestar was just going to pass over him.

An objection was raised, as it was wondered what would happen with Jaykit. The poor kid was put on the spot, when he'd just been expecting to get given a mentor the same as his siblings.

When Firestar and Brackenfur had an awkward answer, Longtail leapt in heroically, demanding to be un-retired so he could come and mentor his grand-nephew.

While most of the Clan saw this as impressive, Jaykit did not. It was humiliating and embarrassing!

It was like they were just going to skip over him, and "the only mentor I could get was another useless cat, like me..."

Jaypaw is dealing with a lot of shame through internalized ableism. It's that kind of sticky misery where you just end up hating everything you touch. NOTHING is good or okay. Everything is awful and if you try to tell me otherwise I will double down.

The type that you can't reason with. So Longtail trying to get through to this kid was already hell.

He was trying to be motivational and uplifting. "We'll prove them wrong, together!" and "Stick with me kid, I'll teach you everything." and "There's lots of ways to be a warrior, we'll find what works best for ya."

It does not work. Jaypaw is determined to hate him, dismissing him as being insincere and fake-nice.

And when that first fight comes up, Jaypaw's spent however long as an apprentice being difficult and his first real matchup is against ShadowClan's Youngest Blender

So of course, Owlpaw toys with him like canon. Keeps dodging and taunting him, making little jabs, commenting on how weak ThunderClan must be to put him out on the battlefield.

After the fight ends, Longtail tries to let Jaypaw mope for a bit about it, lick his wounds, recover.

But he just ends up at his lowest point, and snapping at Longtail that he'll never amount to anything anyway, "a blind warrior isn't worth anything."

And Longtail's LOST his patience. That's IT.

"Get up right now and fight me."

"wh... what?"

"Maybe you're used to everyone else just letting you say whatever dumb thing, but when you insult yourself, you insult ME. And I've got the Right to Challenge over my honor. So GET UP."

Over the course of this fight, Longtail uses it both to coach him on how to properly move, and also to let Jaypaw blow off steam. He taunts him to just let his claws out, while keeping his own sheathed.

And during all this, Jay can barely get a hit in. The fight ends with Longtail easily pinning him to the ground, and he reminds him,

"Don't wanna be a blind warrior? Fine. I can't teach what you don't want to learn, you tell me and we'll find other options, but if I EVER hear those words come out of your mouth again, it's personal."

And after THAT, it clicks for Jaypaw. It's personal. Longtail didn't need to do any of it, stand up for him, mentor him, he wants to.

When he insults himself, or when he thinks of Longtail like he was some cheap option, it hits both of them.

Longtail is an excellent warrior-- and a warrior defends their honor.

Still, Owlpaw remains, and these aren't just internalized thoughts only he has, "don't get mad at me for insulting your honor. I was just repeating what Owlpaw said to me. He said a blind warrior isn't worth anything at all. And it's like the whole Clan agrees, but they just don't say it."

"Then we'll kick his ass," removes his paw from his apprentice's back, "We'll kick all their asses. But you're not going to go around agreeing with them before you even learn how to fight."

The grand irony of this is that after making this promise to kick Owlpaw's ass, having this as a goal in-mind, Firestar begins the fruitful negotiations with ShadowClan which will result in a period of sweet peace. There aren't any battles to get into between them for a while.

So Owlpaw continues to be this sort of "goal" on the horizon. Jaypaw wants revenge against this specific person, while also being forced to work with him at various points, as ShadowClan is their ally.

Something interesting I plan to do is to secretly write Breezepaw as being a MUCH stronger fighter than Owlpaw ever was. Owlpaw is big and strong, but it's BREEZEPAW who's the truly vicious fighter of the Po3 apprentice generation. A cat that Jaypaw faces off with several times, and has a difficult time fighting because of Breeze's aggressive, straightforward fighting style.

Jaypaw fights best against cats who try to get out of his grapples, because he can turn it against them. When a cat is so ferocious that they don't relent at all, meeting him with even more biting and scratching, it effectively counters his unique style.

Between his brawls with Lionpaw and Breezepaw, Jaypaw has no idea how overleveled he is lmao

Bog Project

There's two times that I want to zoom into the Bog Project in Po3.

The first one is when they FIRST construct the dam that destroys the pine plantation, including an altercation with human plantation workers who come to try and dismantle the dam. The Clan cats run circles around them as the humans are too heavy to not sink into the mud. I want someone to jump off the dam, bounce off a person and knock them over with a SPLAT, and then jump back on the dam in one smooth movement lmaoo

(Switch over to the researchers for a second and they're actually scrambling to get the area turned into a different classification of protected site during this. Unknown to ShadowClan, they really do just have to buy some time.)

The SECOND time is when they're simply repairing some damage, Owlpaw starts a fight with Jaypaw and swings the first blow, and Jaypaw realizes it's time to take this man to Clown Town.

The fight begins while they're up on the dam, trying to figure out where a leak is or some other minor thing.

Owlpaw starts REALLY getting into it with Jaypaw. "I can't believe they put me up here with you. It's like they want you to have a little accident so I can say I have no idea what happened."

I'm REALLY TORN between Jaypaw either playing this as peacefully as possible, so it's completely Owlpaw's fault they got into it... or realizing he can totally goad this fight and then be able to say it wasn't his fault because Owlpaw threatened him first: "Bold of you to talk about little accidents. Ur mom"

I'm leaning towards Jaypaw goading it after Owlpaw started it, realizing that snark is a very useful tool. Thinking back to how he used to call himself useless, how Longtail used it to make him unload all his pent-up anger and aggression. It has a purpose.

and that purpose, right now, is making an opportunity to put this git in his proper place.

But either way, when Owlpaw starts lashing out at him, SO much like that first fight, Jay notices something REALLY interesting

Owl always tries to stay out of the line of his whiskers. The blows are hard clobbers, but he's not really scratching because he doesn't want to get close

Jaypaw stays perfectly still, UNNERVINGLY still, and takes one, two whacks. Then he knows that his opponent favors his right paw, and he's about... 2 mouselengths away.

Owl lifts his paw again, and in one, smooth move, JAYPAW LUNGES

Caught square in the belly, they roll back along the wall

Owl recovers, twisting onto his opponent, hissing and scratching to untangle, and they tumble right off the side in a clattering shower of sticks and daub

They make a SPLORCH as their bodies splatter the mud below them

"THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING" -Lionpaw probably

The entire construction crew gathers around. "FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!"

Owlpaw seems to be getting wise, trying to wriggle out of the grapple to win back distance, but Jay hears Longtail's words of wisdom echoing in his head

"To know his own limits,"

He never lets his opponent out of range of his whiskers, Owl breaks away only to expose his back to a vicious opponent

Jaypaw grabs his foe by the neck, rears up and dunks his face down in the mud. SPLAT!

"AND EXPLOIT THEIRS"

Owlpaw screeches in rage, snorting muck out of his nose, blinded

The big bully has no idea to slow down and think about where the blows are coming from, or anticipate how his opponent moves.

Jaypaw's jaws close down viciously on his shoulder, and in a flash, he's wrapped around him like a snake.

Trying to buck him off is only causing Owlpaw to sink into the mud

Jaypaw only releases his lock long enough to command; "SAY UNCLE"

Terrified, like a rabbit with a weasel with its fangs dangerously close to its pulse, he obeys; "UNCLE!!"

Jaypaw disentangles and hops off, and it's only now that he registers the size of the crowd.

Hazelpaw, Poppypaw, Cinderpaw, both of his siblings, every ShadowClan apprentice, plus all the warriors who were assigned to the project

Most are cheering, others murmur with awe or hiss with frustration, Owlpaw's mentor is helping him out of the mud, asking him what the hell happened back there

Jay is GLOWERING. He can't help the smug smile that paints his face, or the pride that washes through his veins, though he nonchalantly flicks the mud off his tail.

but the gloating is cut short. Longtail's rough tongue passes over a swelling lump next to Jaypaw's eye, and a little cut he didn't realize he'd gotten had started to sting.

"Knock it off!" He grumbles, doing nothing to stop him, "you're embarassing me!"

"Embarassing?! I'm so proud out of my fur I just might cry about it and embarass you even more!"

In the aftermath, Owlpaw is the one who gets blamed for the fight on the wall. Though Longtail freely admits that his apprentice can be rude, Owlpaw is the one who escalated it to blows.

That said, no one really "gets in trouble" for it. It's written off by both Blackstar and Firestar as an "apprentices will be apprentices" moment. BB!Battle cats can have battles without holding a formal hearing in parliament about it.

What DOES happen that Jaypaw finds bizarre is that when he gets home and the news spreads, Bramblestar is one of the first cats to start gloating. He feels odd about how odd he feels about it.

But after his father has given his ear a proud lick and explains the situation to Squirrelflight who gives a proud lick to the other one, Jaypaw examines the feeling. He tries to think of other times Brambleclaw has been this proud of him, and that's when it clicks; there are none.

Lionpaw is an accomplished fighter at this point, having landed the fatal blow onto Ripwater. Hollypaw is at the forefront of nearly every diplomacy meeting alongside her mentor, Brackenfur. But Jaypaw.. well, most of his brawls have been little skirmishes. Not really "achievements."

It's not like Brambleclaw has been absent or anything, so... he's not yet sure what to do with this feeling. It's quickly buried as the other apprentices dogpile him, begging for the full details.

Assorted closing thoughts for other episodes and such;

Jaypaw's power is plane-hopping. He can move freely between supernatural realms-- dreams, heaven, hell, Earth. He can interact, physically, with anything on these planes.

No more magic empathy. Society has progressed past the need for magic empathy.

He's going to get several little moments in other episodes where he helps to heal others, especially when Cinderheart breaks her leg.

Becoming a Cleric is a choice that should have significant build-up, since he chooses it over Poppyfrost.

I think the REAL inciting moment that he decides to commit to the bit is that he ends up having some kind of dream where Moleflight (Poppyfrost's ill-fated brother) visits him, just after getting his warrior name, and Mole says, "you will be an excellent warrior."

Jayfang: "theres no way youre just being nice to me. What are you trying to stop me from doing."

He also really likes giving advice and listening to people. Enjoys a good little debate, but I kinda want to show him visibly sharpening his emotional intelligence as Po3 goes on.

It starts with Longtail, who whittles that aimless cynicism into something earnest and constructive.

I also want to work in some scenes where Longtail explains to Jaypaw how much he reminds him of Swiftpaw, his "uncle."

Sootfur too, sometimes. In the humor.

Jay: "Great track record, two dead kids."

Longtail, very quiet... only to break the tense silence himself, "Sootfur, no. Swiftpaw... yes. I should have been a better mentor."

Everyone knows a mentor is meant to teach an apprentice. But Longtail realizes that an apprentice is meant to teach their mentor, too.

And he wouldn't be worthy to guide another paw if he hadn't learned his lessons from Swiftpaw.

"I taught him to ignore his limits. I made him think that he had to "prove" himself to be worth anything. It was something my mentor taught me, which was something his mentor taught him. Jaypaw, there's going to be things you can't do, and when they come, you'll hate me for stopping you. But I'm not here to raise another brave fool who dies to prove a point."

Jaypaw also meets Rock at various points through BB!Po3, especially when StarClan isn't being straightforward about answers or they end up in the tunnels.

Rock is VERY gentle with Jaypaw, but no one else. If Jaypaw hadn't been in the tunnels that time the WindClan kits went missing, he probably would have just left them all to drown lmao

The first hint The Three discover about their powers, and the prophecy at all, comes through Jaypaw inadvertently ending up realm-hopping. I'm keeping it on standby for him gaining access to information through dreams.

Before he eventually pressures Dovepaw to spy on other Clans, he was using his own powers to gather what info he could.

Thankfully, he doesn't discover how much power this actually grants him, or what he can consciously do with this, until OotS.

[jewelstole]

alright , here's the post where i discuss a ton of elements of selina's backstory that is taken into effect here. there are obviously a ton of portrayals that either will be a vibe or won't be. i cherry pick. there is a lot more i'll forget .. but i'll add to it if need be.

selina does have a sister with the name of magdalene "maggie" kyle. no maggie did not become a super villain with the name of sister zero. maggie was tortured by black mask and her husband WAS killed. selina blames herself daily for this and frequently feels immense guilt for the whole exchange considering black mask got to maggie in order to get payback on selina. selina will do anything for her sister.

selina is not the daughter of carmine falcone. instead , she is the daughter of brian and maria kyle. maria kyle committed suicide when selina and maggie kyle were very young. brian kyle resorted to alcoholism and was very abusive. after his death , selina called an orphanage to tell them simply "dad is dead. please help me." which caused the receiver to question who the young woman was. selina did not answer. she escaped through the window that night while authorities surrounded her home , taking her sister into an orphanage where she would grow up. selina , however , lived on the streets with her cats. selina and maggie would not see each other for many many years.

brian kyle did abuse selina due to the fact selina had a similar appearance to his late wife. the older selina was , the worse the abuse became.

selina at a very young age took to cats that would frequent her apartment window. cats were all that she had most of her life. she is indebted to them and never would claim to own one. they go as they please and ultimately , she would begin to go through her own window at night to escape being near her father , adopting certain behaviors they would exhibit over time.

selina would meet a gentleman with the name of theodore "ted" grant aka wildcat with her frequent visits to the streets of gotham. he would train her for a price. she would learn to pickpocket on the streets for a money payment to him. no , she did not have sexual relations with him. he is her mentor and that alone. most of her skillsets have derived from his with an extra feminine touch added.

selina does have a very close friend with the name of holly robinson. there is a lot of trust held between these two women. this is another person in selina's life that she would do anything for and would absolutely kill for. holly did not become selina's replacement as catwoman later in life .. but selina has taught holly to defend herself.

selina tends to skip town quite a bit when her loved ones lives are in danger. she has been known to come back but keep a low profile. she has gone through many different aliases over the years.

occasionally selina will take her favorite partners in crime ( her cats ) on heist missions. they know how to get into small spaces that she cannot reach.

[falmerbrook]

Summerset Chapter thoughts

I've actually moved on to Murkmire a bit ago and forgot to do this oopsies.

Overall: I liked it! Although I have a harder time saying why or why not compared to previous expansions (although lord knows I'll certainly try to explain below). I just had a good time with it and looked forward to logging in every day to play, but I don't think it was my favorite thing ever either. I particularly liked the main quest, it gave us a lot of good characters to get attached to.

More details under cut

What I liked:

The characters! I pretty much liked every reoccurring character in the Main Quest. Obviously y'all already know I loved Darien, and I think this chapter did a good job giving him a bit more depth and setting up some very juicy intrigue for him. Raz is always a joy (although he made less of an impact in this chapter for some reason). I also liked Iachesis (although he made me feel kinda sad, but that's a good thing) and I liked how kind and mentor-ly he seemed. I really liked Leythen and Valsirenn. Their relationship was super compelling to watch unfold and they both got their own internal dilemmas set up due to each other than made them both just really interesting. Leythen was really interesting to me, but I do wish they developed what drew him to Mephala enough to make him loyal to her until he literally died. Valsirenn's voice actor was also doing over time good lord she really made me feel horrible for her. Val needs a long ass vacation after all of that. Even in a good number of the side quests there were a lot of good strong personalities that were fun to work with.

The voice acting has gradually gotten better and better with each new expansion, but I think this is the first one where it has been noticeable enough to mention. I liked the voice acting.

There were a good number of interesting side quests. Some good mysteries (especially the Russafeld one) and lots of "well that was fucked up" magical nonsense. I had fun with them.

I liked the cities and architecture. It felt tall and grand. I have more to say in my dislikes though.

I loved Artaeum! It was so gorgeous and the buildings were gorgeous (I liked the disney castle effect they had on Ceporah tower, that was a good touch to make it look bigger). I liked it so much I've taken several opportunities to just take a walk around it. It was the highlight of this chapter.

The themes with Summerset opening up to emigration were real topical, probably even more now than when the chapter first came out, and I liked their inclusion.

I liked the look of Summerset. I bit generic fantasy but it has enough of its own thing going on that I think it still stands out. The fossilized coral forests were very cool, and most of the fauna were unique but also felt like real enough animals (unlike some other eso creatures). Not my favorite visually but still nice.

On that note, I also really liked the Indriks. Good ass animal. Welwas are good too (although I recently discovered they were also in Craglorn but I skipped that one).

In the Russadeld murder mystery quest (which I just really liked in general) I enjoyed getting some worldbuilding on minor things like the different ways forensics can be undertaken. I just always appreciate when side quests are used to develop parts of the world that are otherwise mundane to us but would probably be different in a fantasy setting.

I appreciated how connected some of the story points of the side quests were with either other side quests or the main quest. It usually wasn't important or anything, but it's a nice touch.

Another thing that I have noticed gradually over the expansions that I think stood out most here was that the enemies in each zone are no longer every 5 feet. You can explore the wilderness without having to kill something every 15 seconds, and I appreciate that.

What I disliked/thought could've been better:

Now, I'm not gonna be one of those "but the cities are supposed to be made of glass!!!" people because I generally don't think the games should have to follow every single one off line or lore from previous games, but I do think they should've leaned into the glass look at least a little bit. Make the cities more colorful! The while stone and marble were pretty, but idk I just feel like they could've been colorful. Maybe keep the white buildings but make their windows all ornate stained glass so during the day the reflect on nearby building and light up the interiors with colors and at night the cities look like a sparkling rainbow? Something like that. The architecture, while pretty, was also a bit to generic tbh.

So arguably this is a complaint I could make about literally any zone/environment of any of these games, and I don't expect it to ever change, but man it is disappointing to me to see some interesting ecological lore in books get tossed out the window so we can always have a bunch of hostile animals/plants that attack you on sight when you travel off of any path. Don't tell me that Summerset's environments (or at least major parts of it) have been carefully crafted to be perfect in the way the Altmer culturally see it (and have a quest around it) and not be able to actually see that outside of like, gardens!

I find delves tedious and was annoyed that we had to go through a few of them for the main quest. I don't think that's happened in any of the zones before this but it felt lazy. Like they didn't want to bother making a new location for the main quest so they just plopped whatever you had to grab in a delve they already built.

Veya made me so angry!! I mean I guess that indicates some good writing because I cared that much and it makes sense she'd turn to more destructive ideologies after everything she went through but I was so disappointed in her and they didn't do enough with her! She just became a generic bad guy we killed (I think this comes down to one of ESO's biggest writing flaws imo, that every story has to be accessible to new players)!

So I'll be honest, daedra lore is probably one of the places where I'm weakest, so maybe I'm wrong, but the inclusion of Mephala and Nocturnal in this whole scheme felt really out of character for them. And even if they would go through something like this, they were written to just be very generically evil demon-like to me. They're designs are meh to me too (Mephala's more than Nocturnal's). Vile at least felt in character and like this is something he'd get invovled with (and I liked his design, but that's because the humanoid look is already what he's always been portrayed as). I just always felt like Mephala and Nocturnal were some of the better examples of how the Daedric Princes aren't just evil but have their own complex moralities, but in this they make them "I want to take over the whole universe!" level evil. Their motivations (once again, besides Vile) feel not in character either. They were weakest part of the Main Quest for this whole arc for me (besides Barbas, who I always enjoy).

Kinda related, a lot of their minor daedra from their realms (specifically Mephala, the other two were fine) felt kinda bland or generic to me.

Also kinda related, the didn't sell why anyone in the Court of Bedlam (specifically Leythen) would believe they Princes or go along with their goals. They wanted to create a paradise? They're daedric princes how do you fall for that??? I can see Veya or cultists who already followed them being easily manipulatable but Leythen goes from respected Psijic to taking the Daedra at their word because of seemingly nothing but grief? And he continues to support Mephala until he dies despite knowing they were lying?? I didn't get it.

Finally, there was a moment that implied that Meridia's realm was invaded that never got a conclusion. Normally I'd be like "well maybe they're setting it up for later" but I know they haven't done anything with it yet so it feels like more of a dropped plot point than a set up for the future.

Let Darien take me out for a drink, dammit!!!

[clouds-of-wings]

I read a text by Varg Vikernes yesterday where he talked about his childhood and how his experiences in school made him into the Marxism hating Superaryan he is today. It's actually pretty interesting - turns out he spent part of his childhood in Iraq because his father was an engineer who got a job there and took his family with him. He had to go to Iraqi public school because the English school was full. (Is that true..? Does that mean he speaks Arabic..? I can't imagine that would have been possible otherwise?)

But he was only there for a while*, mostly the text was about his experiences back in Norway. Kindergarten was already Marxist far-left feminist HELL because you weren't allowed to be alone, you had to share all your toys (which probably, as in other hell-kindergärten, means 'If another kid takes away the toy you were playing with, you aren't allowed to complain'), it was boring, it was collectivist and so on. Same story in school, of course: He was finished with his tasks after five minutes and had to wait for the rest of the lesson until even the dumbest kid had finished. All because of this Marxist Socialist approach that everyone deserved help, everyone was supposed to reach the same level of attainment. He eventually started skipping school a lot and taught himself everything.

It's interesting to me because my own experiences were so similar, yet I came to completely different conclusions from that. It's just so clear to me that the real problem wasn't that the kids around Varg got too much help, it's that he got too little. I strongly believe that smart and talented kids are special needs kids too. They need extra help every bit as much as a deaf or dyslexic kid. Failing that, it's normal for them to become bored, frustrated, depressed or aggressive, just as he describes himself becoming, to even do badly in school despite being more than capable of keeping up.

Smart kids need exciting challenges, food for their minds, personal mentoring, help with the parts of life they are bad at (often social stuff). It's not a coincidence that the people who make a name for themselves as artists or intellectuals are usually from families of artists or intellectuals or otherwise come from an environment that encouraged and rewarded certain behaviours and interests, for example special schools or cultural hot spots that allowed talent to flourish. It's very hard to realize your potential when no one encourages it.

Varg eventually discovered the black metal scene of his day of course, but I wish he had grown up in a place that was even more "Marxist", even more about giving everyone the help they needed, a place that had evolved enough to realize that just because a kid is smart doesn't mean that it's okay to leave them to their own devices. It's basically neglect to just throw a gifted kid in with everyone else and not give them any help. The Marxist axiom "to each according to their needs, from each according to their ability" comes to mind.

I actually agree that collectivism can keep a talented person down. Egalitarianism is often used as a virtuous excuse to make sure a clique will triumph over an individual. I think this is a problem that egalitarian and collectivist spaces generally have, I've even seen it in ethnographies about otherwise pretty paradisaical societies. But clearly this is a blatant waste of talent, and quite cruel. Societies that allow for positions like "shaman" have a better idea: this person gets special training, but in return they perform a service that few others could perform. That way, there's reciprocity. Isn't that the true Marxist way..?

--

\* It must have been at most a year - they went in 1979 and the 1st Gulf War started in 1980 - given that the text is about how he triumphed against adversity, I think he would have mentioned if he'd been there during that time

[naeldeus]

jjk 251

Megumi is a background character to his own tragedy

Chapter 251 dropped, and a certain character is not coming out unscathed. Our cast is trying to seperate Sukuna and Megumi, and after a few tries, Yuuji finally reaches Megumi. But Megumi denies Yuuji's help, having lost the will to live, allowing Sukuna to launch a counter-attack once more. For this, Megumi is called a bum and slandered all over the internet. Yuuji and Megumi's suffering is pitted against each other by the fandom. Part of it is memes, sure, but it's clearly more than that.

Realistically, Megumi and Yuuji are going through very similar events. Megumi lost his sister and teacher while under Sukuna's possession. Yuuji lost his friend, his mentor right in front of him in the span of minutes. Sukuna killed an untold amount of people in their bodies. Both went fetal after it happened. So why is the response so contrasting?

Yuuji's trauma in Shibuya is front, right, and center. His relationships were developed on-page, the reader is just as shocked by the loss of his loved ones, we're grieving right along with him.

Meanwhile, the events Megumi goes through aren't given the same care. Ever since he got fed the Finger Special, at no point does the narrative slow down so the reader can digest what's happening. Megumi's plot and struggles gets glossed over, skipped, or is a complete tonal disconnect to what's actually happening.

Tsumiki wakes up: the only on-page interaction is Megumi telling Tsumiki to go back to sleep, even though she woke up from a nearly two-year coma. She doesn't show up the entire Culling Games arc even though Megumi's participation was to save his sister

Tsumiki turns out to be an incarnated sorcerer: Megumi's reaction to his sister being dead and possessed is practically non-existent because Sukuna takes over Megumi right after

Tsumiki gets killed by Megumi's own technique: This is the worst one, imho. Yorozu is completely in control during this fight, we learn nothing about Tsumiki. There is almost no acknowledgment on how horrifying this situation really is. The narrative focuses more on Sukuna trying to kill Yorozu, creating this disconnect where Tsumiki is seemingly already dead but she has to die again for Megumi's angst. Does it really matter that Tsumiki's body needs to be killed by the 10 Shadows? Isn't the fact that Megumi will forever remember her dying by his own hand not enough? There is accidental pseudo-incest in this arc and it's completely unacknowledged. The tone is just all over the place.

Megumi takes the damage of 5 Domain Expansions: Is he brain dead? Was his soul damaged? Is he fine? What are birds? We just don't know

Gojo, Megumi's guardian, gets killed while possessed: Megumi and Gojo's relationship is a hotly debated topic amongst fans. Is Gojo Megumi's father figure? Are they even close? Did Gojo hold back from trying to kill Megumi or did he think Megumi was a lost cause? Is Megumi even aware of what's going on?

And the ultimate kicker to all of this: Megumi has shown up for a handful of panels for most of the events described. His story is absolutely horrifying and would cripple any man, but it's all off-screened or shrouded in vagueness.

But to large parts of the fandom none of that matters. If Megumi's friends put aside all their pain, why can't Megumi? Setting aside that Yuuji very definitely did not when it was him, I believe this is a direct consequence of the lack of character work. For months now, character after character dies, and no one reacts to it. Gojo, the biggest hope to most of the current cast, died and the story moves on to the next contender in the same chapter he kicks it. They all just jump into the fight like they're swapping party members in an RPG. It's no wonder Megumi gets disrespected for being the one guy who breaks down to the shit he goes through like a real human being. Why should the fandom care when the story itself does the same thing?

There's a lot of parellels Gege could have drawn between Yuuji and Megumi, and while that might still happen, the way Megumi has been treated as a plot device makes the entire experience incredibly unsatisfying.

[carolinahope]

I'm not sure I'm that impressed with this episode. Tonally it was a bit all over the place. But there were things I really liked and some I didn't care for at all. But I will give the story time to unfold.

The talks were amazing. (I skipped the one Eddie had with Marisol, I couldn't care less about her) I love mentor Bobby. And how open Buck and Eddie can be with each other. And the little glimpse of Hen and Athena. And of course, the Buckley siblings.

I loved Hen and Karen's story. Denny was such a sweetheart. And I like that they are adopting/fostering an older kid. The little girl did such a good job. And I liked how that one call played into Hen's situation. I missed them doing that. And Maddie with the 911 call. I like seeing them in scenes together. Especially after the rift in S6.

Marisol now more than ever seems like Ana 2: The electric boogaloo. I don't like her and don't care about her and they seem so forced. Though Eddie doubling down seems so in character and like such a coping mechanism? Like falling back on bad habits because he is out of his depth?

And Tommy kinda reminds me of Ali? Because it still feels like Buck is forcing it a tiny bit but not in the hurtful way as with Taylor and Natalia. I will see where it will go but they seem to be really reading from two different books, still. Plus, him calling Buck Evan reminds me of Ana calling Eddie Edmundo. And not in a good way.

But Lou was amazing. He is doing a very good job. But Tommy is still temporary to me.

I liked how supportive Maddie was. I love their talks and Oliver and Jennifer play off of each other so well. But when she said I... I just think that maybe you're not sure of your own feelings yet. It just felt like foreshadowing.

When Bobby said Eddie had no issues with committing to Shannon I kinda called bullshit. Because he did. The person he has no issues committing to is Buck. I mean, the will? I understand why Bobby wouldn't mention him but it was so clear in that conversation. Buck was the pink elephant in the room with them.

Eddie seems a little off this season because so far he is mostly played for laughs? A little bit ridiculous. But his scenes with Buck are *chef's kiss*. I like how open and honest they are with each other. How they are a safe space for the other. But also go to the other for advice and reassurance. Their talks grounded the story a lot. Even with the teasing. Or maybe because of it. I may be just a tad impatient because I want Buddie, now. But on the other hand their love story is a marathon not a sprint. And as James Blunt said, I'm a patient (wo)man, as you discover.

But we got a hug YAY

And I'm sorry, there is nothing heterosexual about them cosplaying Miami Vice.

[trinitywc]

big fan of the great light!!! do you have any advice for story structure/finding the balance between slow and fast pacing?

so long answer, as usual

I start off by thinking of the Main Points I want to write about, and then fill out from there with Secondary Points. For example, TGL: Main Points (this isn't 100% accurate to the book just a rough example) - WoodClan and CreekClan go to war; a nuclear bomb is dropped - The cats are split up, but find each other by a badger sett - Radiation sickness sets in while trying to find their friends - The cats decide to leave to find their Clan Is the basic plotline, and then i fill it out with moments I want, I'm calling these 'Secondary Points', these are what needs to happen to allow the 4 Main Points above ie for the First point to happen, the Clan needs to be introduced and the setting developed so; - introduce Pinepaw and those closest to her, her mentor, her sister, - introduce the war between the Clans - give Pinefrost a motive to hate WoodClan (her mother's death) and reject her pacifist wishes - hint at the human war with various planes, barbed wire, and soldier mentions So I made a timeline of Apprenticeship > Warrior > Bomb, adding scenes that served a purpose (Secondary Points) and those I deem necessary; introducing a character like Blackwillow as mysterious but distant from his Clan by having him appear on the riverbank, showing Chestnutspike and Ouzelheart's relationship, showing CreekClan's buildup to war and training, showing Pinefrost as a rash, impulsive, but curious, young cat by introducing her as runnign away from her duties to explore the forest (with her friend who wants to impress her). "Necessary" scenes in WaCa fic are stuff like 'this is the medicine cat' 'this is her warrior ceremony' 'this is Clan life and hunting and patrolling', so mileage will vary on your story. When it comes to "fast vs slow" pacing, I'm not sure. I think by starting with the Big Points and whittling down, you can keep the story going- and Story also includes character moments - the "break" in TEW where the cats are in the House also explores the ruined city and affects of the bomb, gives Cuckoopaw and Rutherford some character moments (ie training sessions), not everything is nuclear war 100% of the time. Even if characters are doing something "slow" like walking, or routine hunting, something can happen- character motive reveals, backstory, or just some joking to build relationships, a nice 'break' from the fast 'something happening all the time'. I like to think back to first arc warriors were something happened every chapter (Dangerous Path - Tigerstar is revealed as ShadowClan leader, then Whitestorm reports smelling dogs, then Fireheart bumps into Greystripe in RiverClan, then Cinderheart gets 'pack pack kill kill', then Fireheart observes Snowkit acting weird, then Bluestar refuses to make new warriors, all in the first five chapters; all these are tied up by the end; vs the newer books were to me, it feels like a whole lot of nothing happens in between each chapter)

Later, I'll end up going back and adding things once I know how the rough outline goes- ie once Flaxstripe ran away from the Clan, I went and added some scenes of him being selfish and self-serving- I think it's best to get the skeleton and then paper mache on the meat of the story. 'Slow' pacing is where nothing happens (ala Stevie King where he drones on and on about advertising or some 'scary' childhood story with no relevance to the plot), as long as you are providing some information- be it plot, character beats, 'a nice break', or some fun. Eg, if a character is walking home, that's not very interesting just describing the path home, think of why you're describing it- are you setting up their home route or have we been here before and could skip it with a brief 'and she went home' mention? Is she daydreaming about the awkward goodbye she just had, or her plans for tomorrow, or marveling over the simple beauty of her walk home?

It depends on what you are going for, but if you start small and go big, it works itself out

[liauditore]

For the ship bingo, perhaps ethubs or boatboys?

sorry it took so long to get to this i got so excited someone asked me to talk abt ethubs i went into a coma 😭😭

Ethubs

um uhh umerm ethubs yeah etho and bdubs and last life and mindcrack UHCs and eyah yknow um yeah

you know that one post that's like "inside my head is a five page essay with footnotes and when i speak it's just ouhghh blorbo he is so shaped". that's me with ethubs. not even kidding ethubs is the ship that made me finally "get" shipping in general, mcyt or not. i. words. i care them.

and uh there's. not rlly anything i can say i think that my ethubs moots haven't already said? They've been friends forever, they play off eachother super well, "he loves me", they're both so obsessed and in need of eachother but at the same time would rather eat raw, unpicked cactus than admit that, etc etc they're so unwell

im just gonna skip on over to the song lyrics bit cus i. they make my brain short circuit i cant even sentences.

The scarlet summer is gone and peaceful gray is draping the city Alone, I reach out for you to hold me tight, shivering Always the days spent with you warmed my heart and kept me from freezing Although I knew they were gone forever But in my pain, to me you came like the warmest breeze "On nights so cold I know you need some company."

Though only in lonely and freezing times, we held each other close to keep from feeling hopeless nothings And now again I can see summer fast approaching like a storm that there's no stopping Repeating in a cycle Like our mistakes

My love for you is endless, just like the deepest sea And like the ocean blue your complications speak to me I've come to understand you, your parts and inner workings My sun only in winter Only when I need you or else you won't need me

Leave you in Summer, Yet You're In My Fluffthoughts (Ashe translyrics) (sidenote this might be one of my favourite music videos of all time)

Falling so deeply while clinging to love But even so, I feel my heart and it’s floating up above Your true face, such a passionate one, shows your beauty, coming in a flood True, all of our short-lived youth will someday come to end Ah, even so, in my view, it starts right now, yet again

And every day, I found I prayed for you to be always full of happiness that remains Ah, just like this, please wait right by my side, please stay

Tablet (Will Stetson / sayriris translyrics) (after watching LL the first thing i did was make a MV to this song with LL Bdubs and it was still the most insane thing ive ever done fuelled by pure gargoyle inspiration juice)

I wouldn't say they're ~~Divorced~~ quite yet cus Idk if they were ever really married as much as just plain endlessly obsessed with eachother, which they still are. But they definitely broke up lmao

but yeah uh their chemistry is great. bdubs said it best. they've been thru the trenches together.

Boat Boys

Thankfully much less thoughts about these two or else this post would get way too long lmao. I like them but I'm not too insane about them I guess? Etho's very awkward near people he isn't used to which was fun to watch but made their interactions kind of limited for a lot of DL I feel.

Joel's obsession with Etho is hilarious and seeing Bdubs get jealous of his #1 ethogirl status getting challenged is great fun. He's definitely gone through a bit of an arc from "I KILLED ETHO! I KILLED ETHO!!" in Last Life to "Eefo D:< You're making me nervous, eefo D:<" in Double Life to whatever the cow divorce situation was in Limlife. It seems like Etho's otherworldly status has been nerfed in his head and he's much less intimidated by him, while still admiring him in that 'childhood hero' sorta way.

I think because of that I've always seen them a little bit as more of a mentor/prodigy relationship than anything else? Specifically one that Etho is not even aware he's in. Eitherway, I don't really ship them in the romantic sense 🤷‍♂️ etho's just way too aloof and joel's got too much fangirl energy for it to be anything intimate lol

[yesiknowimshort]

looking at the fanon from canon with tim drake

(to the best of my own knowledge; take with a grain of salt; i’m open to discussion and disagreement; we can take this like an english lit class analysis)

this is inspired by discussions with @boredandboredmind about misconstrued info with jason and tim on their own posts about it.

also do not take this as hate to tim fic writers, you’re amazing and you best believe i’m checking the tim x reader tag constantly. i just want to be able to help give you easy access to half-canon-compliant info, and you can choose to take it or leave it.

and especially if you only know tim through online media (which is always valid and i’ll hear no argument!), it can be hard to differentiate between what it is “out of character, completely fanon” behaviour, and what is actually plausible.

RELATIONSHIPS

with his dad

tim’s relationship with his dad is extremely complicated. they both loved each other… but both of his parents had a very different way of showing their love to what tim needed.

for the majority of his life, his mother and father were super neglectful of him and his interests, which of course is how we had nine year old tim drake running around figuring out people’s identities and tryna convince nightwing to go back to batman bc tim said batman wouldn’t cope without a robin, as if he knew them personally.

bruce generally disapproved of tim being left alone while his parents were on business trips, so he looked out for tim a lot during those times.

after the death of tim’s mother, his father was all moody for a bit bc his company had gone to shit… oh and his wife died. anyway he was acting like mr crabs when he loses his money for a while until his physiotherapist dana winters was like “yo get a hold of your life man”. so jack attempted to reconnect with his son… but tim was already deep in the mantle of robin and hanging out with bruce wayne.

tim was a little reluctant at first but after a while he did really appreciate his dad trying to be a dad for once… but it conflicted with the life he had already made for himself.

tim was sneaking out to do hero work, skipping school, coming home in the early hours beat and bruised, being snarky and angsty to his dad, super secretive; basically coming off as a reckless hooligan teenager (even tho he really wasn’t) which made jack incredibly angry at tim a lot of the time, causing them to have a lot of fights.

jack was also super insecure as his position as tim’s dad as he felt inferior to the relationship tim had built with bruce.

so one day while tim was out, jack raided tim’s bedroom (10/10 parenting skills there, well done jack) which dana winters was horrified by and actually sided with tim when tim came home and blew up at his dad -anyway jack found out tim was robin.

he stormed to bruce and was like “fuck you and fuck my son’s role as robin. he’s going to boarding school”.

long story short, tim resumes the mantle of robin and his dad deals with it and they begin to really get along again, like a true father and son… and then his dad is murdered. tim finds him and is distraught, and that’s when we get this classic image of tim and bruce:

(it’s horrible obviously but i love this illustration so much. the way tim’s half in and out of the robin gear, the single eye you can see, the way he’s half collapsed over his father’s body and clinging to bruce for dear life) anyway then tim goes into the care of bruce wayne.

with bruce

lemme start of by saying: tim would only ever use the wayne name for business means as future ceo/controlling shareholder of W.E.

tim will always be a drake.

he quite literally made up a fake uncle so he wouldn’t get adopted by bruce, even though bruce really wanted to adopt him. not only that- he went as far as to forge a new will including this fictional uncle to avoid being bruce’s son

he struggled a lot with bruce’s “affection” after his father’s death since he never saw bruce as a father beforehand, only ever as a mentor. and of course, up until later in his robin career, he wasn’t even an orphan. he still technically wasn’t since dana winters ended up marrying his dad and becoming his step-mum, but she’s basically forgotten sadly.

he also consistently makes a point to make sure people know he made himself robin, and it wasn’t batman’s choice at all.

he appreciates bruce of course, but it’s more on an intellectual and emotional level than anything else. tim came from money (albeit, new money), and even though his parents' company basically died with his father there would’ve been some amount of inheritance money. not to mention without a shadow of a doubt, he would’ve had an account his parents had been saving for him.

living in another manor house and working around international companies and important people, wouldn’t be too different from what his life would’ve become had his parents not died.

tim would appreciate bruce not for the life he gave him, but simply because of bruce being intellectually stimulating for him. remember; tim sees the life he has as the life he made.

he reminds me of damian in the fact that both of them would struggle with dealing with people who bored them, people who couldn’t offer them anything.

anyway bruce = respected equal, bruce ≠ tim’s new dad.

 with jason and damian

boom. all you need to know.

nah but seriously...

jason attacked tim in the tt tower when he came back to life but can you really blame him? he was replaced, and it made sense for him to come after tim since as we know, tim forced himself into the role and did, technically, steal jason’s spot before bruce realistically would’ve replaced him.

but they never held that grudge throughout jason’s reintegration into the family. of course they’d have sibling fights (note that tim doesn’t think of any of his adoptive brothers as real brothers; but jason is closest to), but a little roughhousing is normal. i’m the eldest of 6 brothers and believe me, we fight all the time. literally yesterday one of them and i bit each other while fighting (if you don’t think damian and tim would do that, you’re kidding yourself). but we love each other, and if anything happened we’d jump to each other's defence.

moving onto damian...

the way tim views damian is very telling of tim’s worldview and childhood. when damian arrived, tim demanded that regardless of being batman’s son or not, damian must work to earn the love and respect of bruce, “like everybody else” he had said. clear projection from tim here, since up until dami, tim was the only one who wasn’t “wanted” per se, and also tim’s had to work for people’s affection and attention his entire life. look at his parents; they were the half-arsed “that’s great honey” and then back to their phone call type of people (well we know where tim gets his steadfast work ethic from).

anyway, tim finally had the spotlight on him for a while only to have it turned for some little genetic abnormality.

tim’s suffering from the “been the only/youngest child for too long” phenomenon; they do not believe there is room enough in one's heart for more unconditional love. it’s quite sad if you think about it; he was in his mid-late teens by this point.

tim was quite patronising of damian when they were introduced, but he quickly pulled the “i’m just messing with you” card and did try to fix it, but stubborn-as-tim damian just started to preach his favourite “i’ll inherit everything without even trying” play. this obviously pissed off tim to no end. it seemed damian knew the perfect way to get under his skin, and it was putting tim even more on edge. it made him feel insecure in his place with bruce. for the first time tim didn’t think he was gonna be able to get his way easily.

eventually though, batman assures tim that damian being his biological son doesn’t change anything that he has with tim, and that tim doesn’t have to prove anything to him.

yes, if you look up tim and damian, you can see that damian has done some horrible things to tim and the two have very thin patience for each other, but that’s simply because they both understand the perfect ways to piss each other off. it’s just so easy for the both of them that they can’t help themselves.

i also will say that damian views the relationship as much more “mortal enemies” than tim does, but he is a child several years younger than tim, so it’s natural for him to view it as a bigger deal than tim.

all in all, jason and tim, and tim and damian are simply just brothers, and if you have more than two siblings, i’m sure you know as much as we deny it, everyone had a favourite and a least favourite sibling -it’s natural. for tim, his favourite is jason, and his least just happens to be damian.

just like damian’s favourite is dick, and least favourite happens to also be tim.

with stephanie

(now i don’t know as much about steph as i do for tim so feel free to correct me)

stephanie brown got into the hero scene by being the best little shit i’ve ever heard of and messing up her villain dad’s plans. her dad was cluemaster, a friend of the riddler, and she would literally just show up and spoil their plans in annoying ways (hence her name; spoiler).

she was tim drake’s girlfriend -it’s important to note that she wasn’t robin’s. she had no clue about his double life and broke up with him because she thought he was being unfaithful (fair enough).

when tim’s dad took robin away from him, steph stepped up to the plate with a made up robin costume and (like tim) demanded to be the replacement.

her 71 days in the spotlight as the first female robin ended in a couple different ways (thanks comics for making it hard). bruce dismissed her for his belief that she couldn’t follow orders, but he also didn’t believe that she could live up to tim... ouch. he didn’t even approve of her as his partner until she was killed. oh god here we go again...

i personally don’t acknowledge that she died. just- nope. i always look at it as wrong place, wrong time for steph. she could’ve been a great robin, but tim left massive fucking shoes to fill, and i reckon bruce was looking for any little reason to fire her -disobeying one order to not involve herself in a fight just happened to be the perfect opportunity (according to bruce). not to mention steph (and this isn’t necessarily a wrong thing) was undisciplined in hero-ing.

not to say tim was straight-laced and serious, more that him being at an equal mental level to bruce, and the both of them having built strong trust in each other, gave him a lot more leeway to do what he wanted and have the means to back up his actions.

ORIGINS OF POPULAR FANON

obviously i’ll never know exactly where something came from. this is more my speculation and attempt and supplying the headcanons with canonical evidence or debunking them.

where does “tim is a sickly boi” come from?

his lack of a spleen.

i’m not sure if most people now know that’s the reason why, but that’s gotta be how it started.

without a spleen, our body's other organs like the liver can take over many of the spleen's functions. you'll still be able to cope with most infections but there's a heightened risk that a serious infection will develop quickly, especially from certain bacteria and parasites like malaria.

if he got on antibiotics and rested when he started to feel ill, he’d be fine, but tim would never remember to take antibiotics and gods forbid he let himself rest so... he’s working until his body forces him to take a break.

mimi approved fanon  👍

where does “tim doesn’t care for himself” come from?

he’s a stubborn person. people don’t emphasise this enough. usually, people just use the motivation of depression (which, fair, it could be included in it). however, he will literally do whatever the fuck he wants because he’s tim fucking drake and that's all the excuse he feels he needs. like he is prepared to sacrifice everything *cough cough* himself to see his plan go through.

he’s also stubborn in his need to prove himself as we know. as a self-appointed robin; his mantle had felt fragile to him. not to mention damian made his grand appearance to push tim into that sweet sweet middle child category.

and as we already know, his dad also forcefully took the mantle from him and stopped him from seeing bruce. every time things start to go well for tim... it all seems to go to shit.

this in turn led to the fanon of ‘chronic perfectionism to the point of halting self-care in order to complete x, y z to prove himself’.

he also canonically doesn’t care much for sleep; in teen titans when superboy finds him awake tim just goes “it’s only three, i’m checking my emails”.

mimi approved fanon 👍.

where does “tim’s a coffee addict” come from?

he actually is only ever depicted drinking/buying coffee like 3 times (i don’t know for sure, please correct me if it’s more/less).

it ties in well with the previous point; tim’s coffee addiction is a way to justify how he can still function when he’s on 5 minutes of sleep, battered and bruised and still able to kick arse and be intelligent.

mimi approved fanon 👍

where does “tim have abandonment issues” come from?

his mum dies and he loses how his dad used to be.

he gains a better version of his dad and then his dad acts like an arsehole.

his dad gets better again and then his dad dies.

he had steph and then she left him because he just couldn’t explain who he was.

he gets bruce and then damian shows up.

he gets bruce back and then bruce dies, and nobody believes him when he says he’s alive.

yeah... it makes sense.

would be mimi-approved fanon, but i’ve never like the way i’ve seen it portrayed in fanon.

i see a lot in fics he does the “i’m pushing you away first to protect us both” and i just don’t personally agree with the depiction. call me petty but that’s my thoughts.

where does the perception that tim’s the soft one come from?

no fucking clue honestly.

mans blinded deathstroke’s (/jericho, hard to explain) good eye on purpose while delivering a one liner about fighting blind, and then told the man he just fully blinded that he agreed with deathstroke that he (tim) could be vicious when he had to be.

that one-on-one moment in the teen titans comic is demonstration enough of tim being the opposite of the soft one. none of the robins are soft. if we’re going off who’s the most “sensitive”, then it’d be dick or damian -those two have the shortest fuse.

tim blinded someone by throwing his fucking birdarang at the guy’s one good eye and was sure enough and committed enough to what he planned to do that he had the precision to make sure not to take the eye out completely -only debilitate him. that’s some calculated callousness right there.

he also boasted to the teen titans about lying to batman, after he just lied to starfire about staying put in a fight (and his lie used that ‘goody two shoes’ perception of himself; he’s self-aware of how he can come off)… and then he broke his friends out of the tt tower by cutting glass in the shape of a bat. dudes cocky as.

not to mention he literally stalked batman and ran around solving murders and dropping off the evidence to gordon before even being a robin. he was on the CIA’s watch list for crying out loud.

tim is extremely underestimated. to the point where (as @forcesofnatureunleashed accurately described) this “uwu” version of tim has taken over the fandom and made him out to seem like a mega wimp and a quiet tortured soul.

i’m not dismissing the shit he’s actually gone through, i’m just saying he’s gone through enough that you don’t need to make up that he was berated by his dad, can’t talk about his pain, and relies on his tech, when he’s quiet literally the best martial artist in the family and highly respected by ra’s al ghul.

you don’t just get respected by ra’s al ghul; especially if you were an overly sensitive, shaky-knee-ed, spineless, weakling.

STRONGLY mimi disapproved fanon 👎

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

Aita for 'Breaking up' with a friend?

This is going to be a loooong post so buckle up. I have been friends with this person, who I will refer to as Bread, since 2017. They were pretty much my only close friend beside my sister(Who i will call Gamer, she is important later on) but also i always found them kinda annoying, but I never said anything because i would have to see them in school everyday and it would be too awkward. So right before my school shutdown for Covid, like on the last day, I (basically) said "I don't want to be friends with you anymore." I however continued to be their friend because they acted as if nothing had happened and honestly it took me a lot of courage to say the first thing to their face anyways. This is the end to the first chapter in our story.

So skip a few months in which we have no school. When online school starts we did it on google hangouts, and i found a way to reconnect with my school friends, i.e Bread and two other people who will become VERY important to the story. These two people who i befriend i will call Sprite and Pepsi. Sprite and Pepsi are currently two of my best friends, however Bread has had a long running history of issues with Pepsi. Mainly they set these aside for the good of the friend group. I introduce the three of them to one of my outer school friend, who is slightly older than us and therefore i will call Mentor(who actually has a tumblr so if you see this, by now you know this is me so keep scrolling.) The six of us become very good friends(for those who need a reminder, that's me, Gamer(my sister), Bread, Pepsi, Sprite, and Mentor. Cue 2021, the friend group now all uses discord and I have been invited into a side group chat, titled something along the lines of 'plans to remove Bread from the friend group.' Now, during this time skip i have mentioned a few incidents have occurred. 1) Gamer and I have gotten in heated arguments with Bread over silly things, them being really rude about Sprite's art, them not liking a documentary I recommended, several incidents where they 'introduced' us to their online friends who was just them on an alt account. Anyway, back to the group chat. I am filled in on even MORE discourse between Sprite, Pepsi, and Bread. I don't really remember any of it know and the gc has been long since deleted. We talk shit about them behind their back while also pretending to be their friend(this is partly the asshole part because we did this A LOT.) During this time Sprite is our double agent, being the person Bread always rants and vents too, despite Sprite discouraging it. During this time somthing very childish happens that i am honestly embarrased to type, so i will skip it, occurs, acting as the catalyst for all of us breaking our friendship with Bread in favor of Pepsi. During this event many hurtful words were said, mainly aimed at Bread(to their face this time.) Our break in friendship, however, does not last long, as right after we(Me and gamer) are added to a groupchat where Sprite tells us that they were a double double agent and was on NO ONE's side during this entire thing and also kind of telling Bread what was going on. They explain that this friendship stuff is dumb, and we all become friends once more (including Bread and Pepsi.) Things continue as normal. This is the end of chapter two

School reopens. I am in a class with Bread and no other friends. Each day my resentment for Bread grows. (Also a quick context for our school, Bread, Pepsi, and Sprite all use the same bus. Me and Gamer do not. Mentor does not go to our school. Many events transpired on the school bus that i am not fully aware of.) At this point I fucking DESPISE Bread. Its lots of small incidents, that i never addressed with them. Them being too touchy, invading my private space, not understanding that WHEN I PUT MY HEAD DOWN THAT MEANS I AM TRYING TO SLEEP SO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DONT POKE ME. At this point all of my friends and I use insta, as me and gamer have just gotten it, instead of Discord. My friends never used discord much, so now, I start talking to my friends more. Pepsi and Sprite start filling me in on more and more of Breads misdeeds. It is revealed to me how pushy Bread is, how they ignore peoples boundary's, etc, and how practically everyone in our grade fucking hates them. This is news to me. I start cutting Bread out more and more. The shit talking behind their back returns, but this time with a vengeance. This time more people are involved. This time, the friend group is larger. This time, the exclusion Bread faces is on a larger scale. It is 2023 now. I barely talk to Bread. Their friendship with Pepsi is entirely down, they had a big friendship over haul that i have not gotten into, but we're still friends, only in name, for Mentor. Anyway, I use Pepsi as a human shield. Bread will avoid us if we are near Pepsi, and wont come to a group event if Pepsi is there. Life is great, because i no longer have to deal with Bread and their bullshit.

Now i come to the final part. The actual breaking up. Bread has confronted me a few months prior about how i avoid them. I weave my way around the topic of saying I hate them because i am very non confrontational. But now, I have confidence. I just finished hanging out with my friends. Its the middle of the holidays so i can send them a message via discord and not have to think of consequences. So i do. I tell them that I don't like them. I don't exactly outline the problems, but I do tell them this has been a long tome coming. Now, comes the reasons why i could be an asshole.

One, I have been 'soft blocking' Bread for a long time before this and i should have done it ages ago. Two, They have literally no other friends now. They are entering a new school year completely friendless, and i cant completely say its their own fault. Three, Most of what I have heard about their wrong doing is passed down from mouth to mouth, so details may have been twisted and I should just confront them about it instead. Four. As their only friend, it was kinda my job to help them, isn't it? but i didnt . I just abandoned them as soon as i got fed up. Five, even when i was genuinely their friend, i was a really shitty friend, refusing to take their side in any conflict that arised. Six, Bread acts like a genuinely nice person that i don't mind hanging out with in person, its just certain things, and the way they act with others and online that pushed me to this point.

So thats it, thats my story. A few helpful things to keep in mind: This is only an abridged version of events. I will be answering any questions i can on a throwaway account to clear up any confusion, and also add more detail on what exactly Bread has done wrong. Also we are all under 18 in this story and currently, so please keep this in mind. I don't think i did anything wrong but also i am surrounded in an echo chamber of people that hate them so i need an outside view to really understand how bad of a person Bread is. Sorry for any spelling mistakes, and I hope this was, at least, entertaining to you.

What are these acronyms?

[bonefall]

I NEED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT MARSHSCAR????

Sure! He's a supporting character in Ripplestar's Rot, and becomes leader of ShadowClan after the Great Pancakening at the Battle of the Gathering.

I wrote about him and every leader post-Ripplestar over here

Marshpaw was a little older than Ripplekit when he was brought to the Clan, just newly apprenticed. Their apprenticeships overlapped and they were teenage friends.

Marsh has always been a sort of quiet dude, he's never been a go-getter. More of a steady, practical guy.

He was friends with Spottedpelt and Gorseclaw too, him and Gorse were the more "level headed" people in the group.

His first name was Marshtail. "Scar" is an Honor Title.

Him and Ripplemoon were young warriors when they became mates. Marshtail could tell you that he liked his passion and drive, but, it would be a half truth. He can't really pick anything in particular that is his favorite trait

He could spend a day stuck in a tree hole with him and it would be enjoyable. He just likes his vibe, he likes to be with him.

There's not much to say about him before the ending of Ripplestar's Rot, because he's a mild guy. His ideal life would have been being a background character who goes on patrol a lot lmao

But at the death of Ripplestar and Spottedpelt, suddenly he was thrust into power he NEVER wanted, in the middle of mourning the loss of his mate and his extended family, and the end of a war he'd given everything to.

His heart broken, he had to clean up what Ripplestar left behind. The other three leaders blamed ShadowClan for everything, and the war had taken a chunk out of the population.

Especially in ShadowClan, with a ton of their warriors being slaughtered at the Gathering. Because of Gorseclaw, they'd seen the attack coming and prepared by only bringing their strongest warriors.

In fury, Dalestar of WindClan and Birchstar of RiverClan exiled many of the outed rebels within their ranks

So, Marshstar was dealing with the other Clans baying for a severe punishment of ShadowClan, adding a flood of new commandments to the code, and also a political refugee crisis

This was a mess. An exhausting, painful mess

It didn't get better, either. No matter what Marshstar did, someone was going to be furious. He couldn't appease the other Clans while maintaining ShadowClan, so, they started exacting revenge by attacking constantly.

(And, mind you, this was the age of Kit Stealing and pillaging. These attacks were high-stakes)

Eventually he stopped apologizing or even negotiating at all. ShadowClan became a sort of secluded, defensive nut that shared very little news, and even skipped Gatherings a few times.

But even that didn't please his warriors. They wanted the Gatherings. They wanted their own revenge. Even as the population recovered, Marshstar refused to do anything else.

The rest of his life felt like he was just biding time. 9 long lives without Ripplestar felt like a curse.

He did do one thing though-- when Houndfang was young, she was a goddamn punk. Little rebel without a cause, the Clan used to be frustrated that she was given such a ferocious name; she could have used a name to calm her down instead :/

She reminded Marshstar of a casual discussion about warrior names he had with Ripplestar, once. About how he liked names that simply made sense, and didn't need to be defended with prose. A Hound and its Fangs

He took a shining to Houndkit, in his melancholic way. She liked bothering him, he wouldn't snap at her or push her away. He would even sometimes enable her-- telling her little tricks for sneaking past the big warriors or giving her advice on how to persuade them to do what she wanted.

So the habit only got "worse." She had absolutely no fear of him as an apprentice and would just announce her opinion to his face.

thinking about it, Marshstar probably took her as an apprentice towards the end of her time as Houndpaw, after getting in too many fights with her mentor and the mentor trying to appeal for a delay of her assessment until she learned respect.

"Hm. No. I don't want her spirit broken. I think the other Clans deserve some hell, actually."

Houndfang didn't have ambition as a kid, she didn't know what she wanted. Marshstar gave her an outlet and it became electricity in her veins.

She quickly took over the Clan when she became deputy, and was more of a leader than he ever was. He just let her start running it.

I feel like he cast his name off, just before he died. He did not want to be Marshstar, he wanted to return to Marshscar, so he held a renaming ceremony for himself and passed on leadership officially.

ShadowClan was reignited in a way it hadn't been in years when Houndstar took power. In the passionate cheering of the crowd, Marshscar slipped away.

No one ever saw him again after that. He was probably sick and went somewhere he could pass away in solitude. Cat behavior

His heart remained with Ripplestar for the entirety of his long life, and for him, it was a relief when it was finally over.

When he got to StarClan, they tried to put him on trial. He got frustrated shortly into it. Ripplestar and Spottedpelt are not here so Literally Why Should I Care?

And they're going to throw this big bombastic ballyhoo, why? To posture? For who? This is pointless and quite frankly embarassing.

He actually interrupted the court proceedings with an Excuse Me. I Don't Want This.

"Thank you for your time. This has been a waste of mine."

It's kind of funny to think that if Houndstar knew about what her mentor did here she would flip her shit at him lmao.

Honestly, he does not mind being in Hell. Like, at all. He'll follow Ripplestar wherever, but in Skypelt I can imagine him making occasional statements about missing the taste of bloodsap or something.

[sidebaxolotl]

If this isn't too personal, how did you come to Christ?

If this comes off disjointed or rambly im sorry lol.

Uhh when me and Sibling were really young we did go to church. Did not understand anything that was going on but I do recall wanting to know more and wanting to know God. I understood the concept of sin and being a sinner and i know i didn't want to be that. I considered myself Christian at that time but I probably wasn't tbh. I did pray a lot tho.

Up until high school i was basically living that same nominally Christian life--i was aware of my bible, didn't read it. Family stopped going to church years ago. I was hanging around a lot of athiests and it was that cringe ahh era of anti-sjw youtube which had a lot of athiests as well. Didn't really agree with the anti Christian things they were saying but i was very bothered by the fact that i couldnt refute any of it. No one i knew irl could answer my questions and i couldn't find anything. It was extremely distressing for me. Like if God was real then it should be able to be demonstrated and proven. Theology should be able to be defended.

Became agnostic for like. 10 minutes. It just felt so wrong and bad like in my body that i was like Nope Not Doing that. Basically stayed Christian out of spite during this period of my life but desperately begged God to show me proof that He was real.

Skip to college: I joined a really solid college ministry and discovered based Christian tumblr. My mentor and a bunch of tumblr Christians were able to answer all my questions and teach me about the faith. I was serving in that church and consistently reading my bible and hearing the gospel. I wanted to believe so bad but I wasn't sure I did. Not bc i believed that Christianity wasnt true, but because I doubted my own belief in the truth.

I remember the moment I really believed though. I was chilling in my freshman dorm on my laptop, reading about apologetics. And i think id found like a list of arguments for the existence of God. I read them and like. Something clicked in my head. Like my whole world shifted. I ran outside and was just staring at everything like God made that!! And that!! And me!! Like the full weight that nothing could exist without God hit me with full force and I couldnt go back to thinking or even existing the way I had before. I also remember calling my parents and excitedly trying to explain everything I'd learned to them and also just repeating God is real over and over. I probably sounded crazy and they definitely did not understand what i was saying but they seemed happy for me. I knew if God was real then the gospel and Christianity had to be true. No other religion compared.

Not too long after that, the head pastor at the time called me and asked if I wanted to be baptized and join the church. I was still a little doubtful of my own belief--what i didnt realize was that I was putting my trust in God to be who He said he was and do what He said He said he would do despite my unbelief, which is what true faith entails--but I said yes. I met with my mentor and pastor. They shared the gospel with me again, and I was baptized.

I didnt realize i was gay until like a couple years after that but yeah thats the story :)

[anghraine]

Meanwhile: I have so much I have to do, and so much I want to do, and suddenly my brain was possessed by an incredibly niche AU fanfic plotbunny.

It's not only for the Guild Wars video games (hardly the most popular series out there!), and not only GW1 fic in particular (the first game was on a far smaller scale than GW2 and had a much smaller userbase with maybe five fics on AO3). The fic concept specifically appeals to me as a way to unfridge Althea Barradin, an NPC I latched onto in 2005 out of all proportion to her screentime and frankly how well her lines were written. But it's not only that she's an underwritten GW1 character, or even just that she's one who only appears in Guild Wars: Prophecies—the very first GW game. She's actually only alive in the tutorial zone and is a mentor to PCs of one specific class that happens to be my personal favorite, mesmers (they're elegant spellcasters specializing in chaos magic, illusion magic, and other sneaky, unpredictable stuff).

There's a cataclysmic war crime committed against your people at the end of the tutorial, and a time jump to two years later, when you discover that Althea disappeared in all the upheaval and has not been seen since. You get a quest to discover what happened to her, only to find out that the answer is "dragged off and burned alive by the war criminal invaders." The worst resolution for my teenage pixel crush :( Anyway, you briefly interact with her ghost and gather her ashes to take to her father so both of them can find some kind of peace.

BUT

I sometimes think about how Althea's father (Duke Barradin) was originally next in line in the royal succession. He has already stepped aside for a popular war hero to become king instead when GW1 starts, and there's even a quest in the tutorial to make sure he and his people are faithful to the war hero king, Adelbern. At that point, Adelbern seems to be a good stabilizing authority figure after a lot of internal conflict, but he can be a bit short-sighted and self-aggrandizing in ways that become disastrous when his subjects are massacred in a massive magical attack that devastates the land and people (even GW2 acknowledges that this was so destructive that the aqueducts ran red with the blood of his people).

Adelbern is very obviously not equipped to handle the absolutely dire situation he ends up facing. He's already snapping under this incredible strain in GW1 and disowns his adult son (and it seems only child) for rightly questioning him, only to break even further when said son dies tragically. From what can be pieced together, he only went further downhill after that, becoming more unreasonable, absolutist, and desperate until he completely lost his mind.

Meanwhile, Duke Barradin—Althea's father and the guy who got skipped over for Adelbern in the first place—seems a far steadier and less egocentric figure. He gracefully accepted Adelbern as king before the game, and serves him with loyalty and discipline for the rest of his life, rather than taking Adelbern's ascension as a personal affront or holding a grudge or turning on him in the face of his own tragedies or anything. So I occasionally wonder what would have happened if Ascalon had kept to the traditional succession and Duke Barradin had become the next king, rather than Adelbern.

The cataclysm and invasion still would happen, but I think Duke Barradin would have been more resilient and less obsessed with his personal power and authority. He seems deeply fond of his daughter and I suspect wouldn't have disowned her over a tactical disagreement. Basically, from everything we saw of this guy, I think he'd have handled this situation a lot better than Adelbern—but this is such a niche scenario that requires so much information that I didn't feel like writing it.

But yesterday I was re-reading an idle post I'd made a couple of years ago that mentioned the concept in passing and suddenly realized that in that scenario, Althea would have been the heir rather than her canonical fiancé, Prince Rurik. Instead of tragic war victim Althea whose awful, awful death in an atrocity of war matters mostly because of how terrible her father and fiancé feel about it, she would be Princess Althea, the heir to a now desperate and struggling kingdom. We'd get Althea prioritizing saving her people above everything else, while Rurik gets the horrible death that illustrates the stakes of the war.

In a way, that would even make a bit more sense, logistically. In the game, Althea is a fancy illusionist strongly associated with her theatre just outside of Ascalon City, at this point the seat of Ascalonian power. Even after all this devastation, it took decades for the Charr armies to get far enough into Ascalon to seriously besiege it (before the remaining population was reduced to undying vengeful ghosts, too). It's not beyond belief that a warband could have reached the theatre, and it's also possible that Althea might have been in a more dangerous location at the time of the Searing, since lots of people were dragged off, including children. Just a bit odd in terms of where you would expect a fancy civilian noblewoman specifically to be, even a powerful and highly skilled spellcaster like Althea.

Rurik, on the other hand, is an intimidating warrior, and he's heavily involved with Ascalon's military, especially the Ascalon Vanguard that he himself leads. There's every reason for him to be fairly near the battle lines even without expecting the Searing. The fact that he's one of the main leaders of the Ascalonian military defense would hardly save him from being sacrificed in this terrible way.

(And this might still be a better end than the one he actually gets in canon, in which he's resurrected as an undead servant and forced to serve an evil lich until you kill him for good, freeing him. Getting reduced to ash by the Charr would at least spare him that.)

Despite a certain degree of pathos, though, Rurik was always a bit annoying IMO. He is a very archetypal honorable warrior dude, not as hidebound as Adelbern nor as blind to the reality of the threat they're facing, but his personal approach still tends towards an attitude of "if hitting my problems with my sword doesn't solve them, I didn't hit them hard enough." The PCs really have to handle anything that needs more diplomacy or subtlety.

Althea, though, is a very different kind of person—subtle, tricky, versatile—so I don't think a Princess Althea would necessarily be nailed to the same path as Prince Rurik is in canon. Mesmers in GW2 canonically use their powers of illusion to make themselves appear they're in a particular place when in reality they're skulking invisibly somewhere else, which could easily keep her from being an identifiable target where Rurik was striding around a snowscape with a giant flaming sword when he was killed. I don't think the premise requires Princess Althea dying the same way at all.

I can imagine, for instance, that the AU king might send a reliable, competent, and trusted figure like Althea to ensure the refugees get across the mountains, especially if he wants Althea "safely" out of the country. But as an illusionist, Althea could definitely take precautions that were not available to Rurik, and would be expected to do so.

So there's this whole "okay, if Althea isn't killed like in canon or even like Rurik is in canon, and I manage to completely unfridge her, how does her survival and the AU in general affect the GW1 plot? What is changed about the later canon revelations of what's going on in this era from Eye of the North and GW2?"

I don't have time for this and it's so incredibly specific that it's difficult to even explain to anyone else, but it's also possessing my brain ;_;