#and OTHERS sorry sorry im sure theres more
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famblies (found or otherwise)
#a sketch dump . by meeee . hiiii im here still i prommy#mash#hrughhh so man y people#trapper mcintyre#max klinger#bj hunnicutt#hawkeye pierce#radar oreilly#margaret houlihan#of which there is a distinct lack of for once lol#charles emerson winchester iii#francis mulcahy#and OTHERS sorry sorry im sure theres more#nurse kellye#u get one bc i like u a lot#waughhhhh most of these are because i went insane abt cute casual affection and families (see. the mcintyre girls bc im soooooooooooooooooo#normal abt that). but yeah enjoy i shall slink back into the shadows i am doing another mash painting so thatll probably happen at some#point. UMMM ummm. buy my acrylic charms boy.#my art#long post#NEARLY FORGOT THAT SJDKFSDF but tbh if u follow me its a long post. its always a long post unless i get too impatient to save up on drawing
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Woe ryomina dump be upon yee 💙💛
#persona 3#persona#p3#persona 3 reload#minato arisato#makoto yuki#ryoji mochizuki#ryomina#persona 3 art#persona fanart#SORRY FOR THE INACTIVITY 😭😭#i dont have an excuse ive still been drawing but not psot8ng on tumblr i forget💀#i said b4 that im more active on twitter now where i posted these eariler#some of these are from a month or 2 ago others fairly recent so thats why theres some inconsistenty#tbh im not sure if i just post all if these seperate bc they dont match up at all or just all in one#uhh fuck it the ppl need more ryomina and im here to shove it down all at once#im still just as crazy for this pairing than i was b4 dhshqhq#side note dont ask me how ryojis hair works in his scarf i dont have an answer💀
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Mr Q if you had the opportunity. Would you take in the bench trio? For research purposes of course.
. . why the actual fuck would i do that?
i'm not on the best terms with any of them, especially tubbo. tommy's most likely, if anything, but there's too much risk in that itself.
my nation isn't an adoption center. plus, minors aren't allowed in at least two venues already. they'd all get incredibly bored; and i don't have the time to entertain them.
#quackitychirps#avian event#ask blog#ooc: sorry anon we stick to canon here </3 im sure theres other blogs which allow more fanon but assume most of it is null and void here
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in case i can't think of an actual good way to edit them this is the eragon cast in the sims as i envisioned them as a kid
#ts4#inheritance cycle#i can't do nasuada justice i need to go cc shopping i think#murtagh and angela have GOT to be trans im sorry theres no other explanation. i know it to be true#tbh as a kid i was like orik's a ranga right... he is not. the wiki says brown hair not red. okayyyy sure i can adapt#i need a good adaptation i'll even let lmm into it just to bless it so its good. ple as e#'eragon getting slightly more slanted eyes from the blood oath celebration is problematic' well i always saw him as asian anyways. so .#seph.txt
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I think its cute that joshua finds neku entertaining considering he agrees w neku that he never found anybody fun to be around. unfortunately this is to nekus detriment. sorry sewer god thinks its fun to fake his death and put u on the spot to decide the fate of shibuya
#i think its cute. “i never found anybody fun to be around” “me neither” -> “you sure know how to show me a good time”#its ad neku but cmon. iirc b4 he talks abt wanting to fight his universes neku but yk. hes occupied.#its like the “i dont get people. never will.”-> “i thought i finally found a friend to relate to”#unrelated. i saw someone like. imply that neku learns to be so “moral” in a way so he doesnt shoot joshua#like neku didnt care or trust joshua at all during w2 and didnt connect and purely didnt shoot joshua because trust ur partner#and im. LOL what………………#i might be biased because i do ship them but lol#interview saying at that moment neku absolutely couldnt point the gun at joshua and shoot#ok unrelated again. ik trust ur partner and all that shtick but i think its broader.#its abt caring abt other people (in general).#neku cares abt everybody! he cares abt shiki and cares abt beat + rhyme#and even the other players + everybody in shibuya + the reapers that literally#try to kill him etc etc#and at the end ofc. he cares abt joshua.#he cares abt him enough to be unable to shoot him#I think its more rhan just oh trust ur partner#because neku didnt even think shibuya would still be standing#he didnt trust joshua to make the right decision (side eyes the anime)#unrelated x3 i think its interesting#how neku changes tactics when trying to convince joshua#usuallt he kind of just. brute forces it lol#but he ends up playing games and bargaining etc etc#like joshua. he learns to play joshuas mind games#i wonder if thats part of the whole. friend i can relate to thing#because hes essentially forced to. LOL.#sorry joshuas so stubborn and annoying neku#hes stronger than me#claude txt#THERES SMTH I WANTED TO SAY. but i cant say it 100% accirately and its extremelt dubious and i have to check the entire game sceipt but lik#lowkey. is that nekus first instance of “putting himself in anothers shoes”
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waow
#before anything else i must warn this is going to be. unorganized thoughts mostly#in the last year or so ive tried to regain confidence that i am in fact plural and am not just faking it#or mistaking other symptoms for DID. shake off the denial y'know. as is so signature for this damn disorder#a diagnosis probably wouldnt even make me feel more sure lol. and also getting diagnosed for this specifically is like#the final boss of psychiatry to put it lightly lol#but when it quiets down in headspace ur always gonna feel like. maybe its over. whatever that was#it was just me and brandy for a while#but guess who had a godawful night and then a godawful morning and split a new alter ‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥#he hates it here! he might hate me for creating him! im not sure !#hell im not even rly sure if im juno or brandy rn lol. my mind is just so messy today#i woke up.. when did i wake up. like 9:30 i think and its 1pm now and i haven't gotten out of bed#i don't even remember all that time passing . i couldve sworn its only been like an hour. two at most#on the one hand this has all been kinda terrible and mentally exhausting but at the same time. hey cant say im faking now LMAO#the other hand is brandy. the other hand is absolutely brandy. i am tired lol#im only posting this here so i can just like. process it i guess#ive had a weird time finding an outlet to just spew random thoughts into since leaving twitter so. sorry#idk if anyone's expecting this of me but i always kinda feel like i need some level of professionalism on this account#keyword some. i know this is tumblr#but idk if these very open posts are. annoying? weird? uncomfortable? entertaining somehow?#i know I know theres no point in worrying abt how others percieve you . knowing that hasnt stopped me from doing it lol#i dont remember where i was going w this. maybe i didnt have a goal in the first place#idk if you read this far i dont rly need u to act like u didnt see it cuz like. wouldnt have posted it otherwise#but idk why i am posting. idk what i want out of anyone who has read all this#maybe just. interact w this post in some way idk. it's actually kinda grounding for me if you can believe it#bleghh im thinkin of cheating on my weed break just to treat myself after all this. weed + a long walk would fix me
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god i really am a tumblrina I read ur poll as Gaz and immediately clicked Price before I realized it said Gomz 😭 rip my piss reading comprehension 💀
Anon its ok though I wish I was even 10% of Price 😂
#if i can have even one ounce of the confidence of that man Im sure I wouldn’t be suffering in uni so much#but oooo no i dont want black lungs NFJSJDJJS#that was a low blow oops#ask response#thanks for the ask <3#i wonder if anyone else who voted Price also did it as a mistake or they genuinely felt I give off Price vibes#the only thing I can say its similar is im a leader in most projects I’ve come across#but not bcuz i like leadership is bcuz theres no one who gives a fuck about assignments and presentations and im not about to fail bcuz#of the incompetency from others LMAO#its so bad like there are NO structural plan if i dont step up everytime#like oh we have to submit this by friday - ok - radio silence - a day before friday - oh hey so should we do something#ITS INFURIATING#U THINK IN A FIELD OF PHARMACY THEY’D BE MORE LOGICAL but nope#its the same everywhere#sorry anon i ranted there OOP#anyways
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Would love to hear about potential parallel stories/lore in judaism 👁👁👁👁💞
i realized that i actually havent thought very in depth about parallels and themes in the bible in a LONG time but let me think...
one that jumped to the forefront of my mind is something that idk if its a theme/parallel or not, but it has to do with moses. in the torah (really in the talmud i think which is a bunch of rabbi's headcanons about the torah that were then accepted as canon later on), when moses was taken in by pharaoh a test was performed to see whether moses would overthrow him, and by extension whether he was safe to keep and raise. that test was to show baby moses two pots: one of gold and riches and one of hot coals, and whichever he grabbed would be indicative as to what kind of son he'd be. so obviously, being a baby, moses starts to go for the shiny stuff. but (so the story goes) since moses has plot armor an angel (of death [?]) reached out and moved his hand to the hot coals. this is important because not only did it secure his safety to grow up under pharaoh's watch, but it burned his hand, which he then put in his mouth which permanantly burned his tongue and gave him a lisp. now the lisp isnt really talked about much more until later on, and its kind of minor so i get why its often left out, but it changes the whole feeling of the story! because of the lisp, moses gets nervous to speak in front of pharaoh's mages, and so it's aaron who does the talking when they turn their staffs into snakes. it's aaron (iirc) who speaks to the hebrews and tells them the word of god. moses is the one who speaks directly to god and does his bidding in the stories, but aaron is the one who conveys the information. and AND i just remembered this continues!! it continues to be true that moses doesnt always tell his own story!! in the scientific world it is generally accepted that there are a few different authors/compilers of the torah, but in judaism there is one main accepted truth of how it was written with two endings: moses wrote the whole thing up until the last chapter when he was on mount sinai, writing down word for word what god told him to. the ending, though, changes because at the end of the bible moses dies there is a debate over whether moses wrote his own death before it happened (since god is omnipresent blah blah blah) or whether joshua took over for him after he died. if the latter is true, that would be the second time someone tells moses' story for him!! first aaron tells the mages and the hebrews who moses is and why he was sent to save them, and then joshua tells the story of his death and his exile from the holy land! there are THEMES and MOTIFS i can SEE THEM
i have no idea if this is what you were asking for but thank you for inviting me to infodump XD <3
#theres other stuff about moses too now that i think about it#i think this was just at the front of my mind since i just watched the prince of egypt last sunday lol#or whenever it was#i almost talked about something else and now i legitimately cant remember what it was#but if i flipped through im sure id remember more#oh i remember now it was how moses wasnt allowed to get into the holy land#even though he was the one chosen to deliver the hebrews#and even though the hebrews were forgiven time and time again#moses fucks up once when god was having a bad day or something#and boom exiled from the holy land#like my dude wanders the desert for 40 fucking years#cant you give him a break#themes and motifs my beloved <3#im sorry this is so long this is kind of my word vomit#ty for asking <3#id also love to talk on the server if thats easier just so you and me and jed can all talk at the same time lol (no pressure tho for real)#asks#alistair my beloved <3
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man, i have so many thoughts about qfoolish. he's just a silly little goofy guy but then when you peel away the first layer that you see of him and realize that he's rather a complex character. I feel like he's such a different type of character than what is usually shown. (and honestly, it's something that brings me a lot of comfort as i relate quite heavily to his very laid back nature that people will sometimes take as being unserious or even uncaring) Warning, this gets long (like 2.2k long to be exact) lol and i ramble a lot- also, disclaimer for my own sanity: this is an analysis of the characters! i adore any of the creatures mentioned here so please don't take any of this as a negative view on them! :D
Foolish's motivations are just very different than what typically motivates a character forward and in some sense it's really easy to skew what you think about him. As in, it's really easy to misinterpret his character i think. He express himself in a different way than i think most people are used to. He laughs in serious situations and is constantly just joking around. I think this causes people to think he cant/wont ever be serious, but the thing is that he's perfectly capable of being serious when he needs to be. For example, if he thinks that he and Leo are going into a serious situation, then he tells her to put her armor on. Really, just anything involving Leo he makes sure to be serious if the situation calls for it. Or like, fighting in dungeons only if he deems it dangerous enough to take seriously. but like, if he doesn't think a situation calls for it, then he just continues to be his goofy self. And sometimes when the situation calls for it, he is just in between those two points in a way that others aren't. He's just not afraid to joke around even when the situation seems dire (cellbit's kidnapping and rescue comes to mind. like, he played such a large role with his symmetry wand, but despite all the serious moments going on,, he was still just a goofy guy).
And one thing about him being so silly all the time is that even the other members on the island sometimes get a misconstrued picture of what they think foolish's goal and wants are. I think in some sense it's true to say that what motivates his wants is what the value of something he perceives is. For example, the sunbird he only wanted because of how cool it sounded and how rare it was. The cloud he wants because its something unique and useful. He wants Cucurucho's friendship because that's something no one else has and Cucurucho has access to items and is powerful.
But these wants aren't the most necessarily the most important things to him. Their something he has interest in, yes, but they're not more important than say his friends and family. Which, i feel like some people might not recognize about him. After all, he is constantly talking about wanting a cloud or how he'd have no issue in killing Bad (and holy shit is landduo and their relation something i could go on about for a whole more hour cuz there's so much there)
Because one vital thing that's so *so* important to recognize is that Foolish is very possibly one of the most loyal people on the island. And despite all of his flaws, he would never really want to truly hurt those he cares about. He is loyal to the people he cares about to an absurd amount. I think it's very clear to see his devotion for Vegetta and his adoration for Leo, but his loyalty also applies to his friends on the island. He would never *intentionally* want to harm anyone he cares about. I don't think some people understand that Mr. Mustard fell under that category as someone he cared about. The entire reason Cucurucho was able to lure him into accepting the mission It gave him is because it brought Mr. Mustard's name into the mix. It told Foolish that Pac and Mike were the ones responsible, and with nothing better to do, Foolish set out to complete this task.
To talk more about the recent events with him arresting Tazercraft: he would never truly want to harm or hurt them. However, when you're looking at the grand scheme of how things went down, he was manipulated and really had no other choice. Sure, he seemed to enjoy arresting them at first, but the thing is I don't think he really processed or even thought about how this action would be received by others. To him, arresting Pac and Mike sounded like enough fun, and it was coming from Cucurucho (who he's wanting to be friends with for actual months now, and Cucurucho literally called him friend in the book it handed to him) and being arrested sounded like something he'd enjoy. Again, like something *he'd* enjoy and that he therefore thought Pac and Mike would enjoy.
You have to realize, Foolish doesn't have the same perspective on these serious situations as some others do. And the thing is that he judges how others react based on how he would react to them. So, in that sense, he views being kidnapped/arrested as a good and fun thing! he even said today on stream, "apparently when you arrest someone, others won't find it funny". it might have just been one line, but in my eyes this gives a really clear insight into his character. To him, arresting Pac and Mike was only a positive thing because it would help him find his friend and it could be a fun event for them. His friend that he was told, by cucurucho, that had disappeared because of Pac and Mike. Foolish doesn't hold any ill intent, but that doesn't necessarily come across in others view of him. Although it might not be clear, he cares about Pac and Mike. Today he even expressed worries about them and said that he still considers them his friends (even though he's aware that they might not share those feelings about him anymore). He doesn't know about their past traumas, to him this was just a fun little event that would be fun for both them and him. When first accepting Cucurucho's mission to him, I'd say he doesn't realize the consequences his actions would have. That by arresting Pac and Mike, it'd leave the other members of the server doubting him and mistrusting him. That others would be angry at him for something that he hadn't realized the gravity of.
(just random thing i want to say here: honestly, if Foolish had any malicious intent towards Tazercraft, he could have easily made their arrest go unnoticed for at least a few days. just think about it: if he had said that the surprise he had was just for the two of them. if Jaiden hadn't accompanied them as a witness. people wouldn't of known then what happened to them, but the thing is that he wasn't thinking in this way because he would never seriously want to harm them. he even wanted Jaiden there as a witness)
I think he realized the backlash of his actions in the Favela when everyone seemed to swarm him and then when he got interrogated. In which, he never really lied. All things considered, Foolish is a rather honest guy. I'd even say that he almost never lies. Like, if he's trying to hide the truth about something, he often times will find a way to skirt around the question without lying. Like, just looking at the mess that was the interrogation yesterday (/lh) you can see that he doesn't ever actually lie. He just blabbers a bunch of nonsense and skirts around the issue without ever revealing anything. The issue arises when you look at the lie he did tell.
for those that don't know, Foolish gave Jaiden a rundown of what happened before arresting Tazercraft. and in this he tells her that Cucurucho gave him the option to either 'arrest Pac and Mike' or to 'kill Richarlyson'. Not even going to lie, when he said this is took me (and i think all of stream) off guard. because Foolish practically never lies in that way and so blatantly. because this was just 100% untrue. However, it makes sense why he did it. At that point, he realized that people were going to keep badgering him on why he arrested Pac and Mike, but at the same time he knew they wouldn't take him telling the truth seriously. He may care about Mr. Mustard but the truth is that the other members don't hold those same thoughts towards most the Capybaras in general. Like, just look at Fit's interaction with him today. Foolish literally reiterated the truth of why he did it over and over again, but Fit didn't believe him even slightly. Foolish didn't lie once about his motivations and yet he was just not believed.
I think he realized at some point soon after arresting Pac and Mike that people weren't going to trust the truth. Not from his mouth at least. So he lied to Jaiden because it's a lie that people will easily understand. it's a choice they'd stop questioning him about. Again, he doesn't do this out of malicious intent but because it's something easier for people to understand and relate to. It's something they're not going to hound him about, not like they will when he tells them the truth. This lie is more easily digestible for the island members and it also brings Foolish less stress if they take this and believe it. Everyone is willing to make sacrifices in order to protect the eggs. And he had to of realized that Jaiden was going to tell other people. The islanders almost always spread these types of details to each other, that's just how it goes. Telling this lie to her in secret makes it all that more believable when she goes and tells some of the others about it later cuz it's something Foolish told her in confidentiality. To the other members, it paints foolish only in a good light. Of course he wouldn't have actually wanted to arrest Pac and Mike, he did it to protect Richas! and that's all it takes to stop them from getting angry at him. All things considered, it's a smart move to pull. Although, I do have to wonder how this will come to bite foolish in the butt. Because i can only imagine that it will be revealed eventually, some way or another.
From what i understood, Cellbit immediately dropped his anger on Foolish once he was told it was to protect Richarlyson. When Jaiden tells him this information he doesn't even thing to consider that Foolish could have lied. After all, why reason would anyone have to lie about that? In my mind, i can only imagine that the lie will protect him for now and in the short term, but once revealed that it's a lie, i think there will be some repercussions against Foolish for sure. Like, even Jaiden doesn't know that he's lied. Jaiden, whom he's been telling everything about. Jaiden who is only one (aside from Leo) who now knows of Foolish's secret detective role. Jaiden, whose the one he's told almost the entire truth to.
An interesting thing to note though, is that I think Foolish's decision to lie to Jaiden was still rather spontaneous. like, it's not something he thought too much about. it's a fib that makes his life a little bit easier (a little bit less lonely) and right now it doesn't seem to hold any repercussions. the interesting thing, though, is that he hasn't repeated the lie at any point in time. and like, he also hasn't done any lying to reinforce the lie he's told. it'd be so easy to paint a story that he's being blackmailed, but he just *doesn't* even though it's a lie he's made himself.
Foolish, all in all, is someone that just acts or speaks before really thinking too much about what he's doing. About the possible side affects of his actions. He just *does* them.
I think it also plays in very well with the idea that he's lived for thousands of years. the things that affect the typical mortal just don't phase him in the same way, not when he's viewing everything as an adventure or an element that is fun. i think that also taking into consideration that he's lived for such a long time, it's rather surprising how easy he is to manipulate. Because that is what Cucucrucho is doing, when looking at the whole picture. cucurucho holds a lot of power and we all know that it easily could have arrested Pac and Mike without the intervention of Foolish. So why make him do it anyways?
Well we don't know that for sure, but we can make some guesses. To sow distrust between the members. To see how far Foolish was actually able and willing to go for the Federation. To place blame on someone aside from itself. All possibilities.
Regardless, Foolish has played right into their hands. He's a silly guy that's gotten himself into a serious situation. One in which he might end up having to navigate alone because even though he has Jaiden he's still lied to her, and even though he has Leo, he would never want to put his daughter into harms way. He said something at the end of the stream about how this might just end up being a lonely road he's taking and i couldn't agree more.
Anyways, that's all i got for tonight as it's late and idk what im getting at here, i just think Foolish is really neat and wanted to attempt to put that into words. :D
#qsmp#mars rambles#foolish gamers#qsmp rambles#does this make any sense? im not sure#but i needed to write something because the foolish brainrot is real#character study#also this is just my thoughts so far and they might not be the most eloquent so sorry#also! i would love to hear if anyone else has any other ideas and interpretations of things :D#theres more i wanted to add but i could only write so fast unfortunately so i forgot some things i mightve been thinking#im really excited to see where the storyline takes foolish#and to see if he ends up digging his own grave :D
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#tiny ramble. just bcs. but its kinda funny how like. the scavs plot is sorta forgotten when it comes to the ''happy'' LL ending?#like. they just got a baby. and crnkcase just got an alien boyfriend not that long ago. but thats all gone when they jump#and sure yeah. the jump is great for the LL crew. there's a reason its the ''happy'' ending#but no baby. no alien boyfriend 😔#flcrum would prob be happy about that. but grim and msfire def got attached. and crnkcase was just gaining some confidence in love. so?#idk. i just think its interesting how its kinda assumed by those that are more interested in the LL crew that the scavs would just fit in#bcs yeah. they worked well with the LL crew. but thats during quite the distracting and more important than socializing event#and bcs of that. the dynamics and real nitty gritty character interactions arent explored much#beside frt mx. love that they got buddy buddy with him ngl. wish we had more honesty. its a fun dynamic to explore#but yeah. idk. i think there could've been some idk. im tired. im running out of words. but interesting dynamics between the LLs and scavs#other than just everyone being super chummy and the scavs being just. idk. the ship class clowns or just background plot devices#like. theres a lot of interesting varied and nuanced relationships with the LL crew. so itd be a given with the scavs thrown in the mix too#let there be beef and tension and misconceptions and misunderstandings. along with the friendships and cooperation and community#ig it boils down to those who are more fans of the LL crew giving the same attention and care to the scavs equally to achieve that#not like. throwing shade or smth there. just like. idfk. scraping the bottom of the barrel for scav content makes one desperate#and some content just... isnt it. which just leads to looping back to reading scav-centered stuff again lol#sorry. star's post(hi) about krk made me think about a certain popular fic and my feelings about it and post-LL fics in general#im very aware of my own character biases. and how that affects my perception of content. but sometimes ya just wanna complain to complain😔#not saying the fics in mind are bad or anything. just that theres a plethora of LL-centered fics. and only a few scavs ones post-canon#so i tend to get nitpicky with LLcrew-centered scav stuff. but generally any of the scav-centered ones? i cherish either way lol
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Oh yeah i watched another video defending ft again last night . i have remembered my roots 🫡 Not like i ever lost it but ive gained a deeper perspective....
#im not sorry for hating but at least i understood the themes of it smh#im not gonna watch any video bashing on ft because ive seen all those genuine criticism enough on tumblr quora Insta twt everywhere#yeah its full of sexy fanservice yea the characters get worse overtime yea the fight choreography are ass yea you can barely call it an#animation i know!!! i know ☺️ its nice seeing someone voice out your own opinions in a comprehensive way its so cathartic#like finally!!! People who also think the art is gorgeous!!! someone who thinks Juvia Erza & Lucy are cool outside of powerscaling!!#someone who gets that we're following the entire guild not just Lucy & Natsu & their team THEY GET IT!!!!#THEY UNDERSTOOD THAT GMG IS PEAK FT#& how FT really isnt about the fights even if its labeled as a battle shonen;;;#theres people who notice how FT is extremely but subtly different compared to other shonen and im sooo glad im not the only one#thats why its the only mainstream shonen i can get behind; it doesnt really have a reader insert (? Maybe Lucy but.)#& so none of the characters rlly have any giant goal like 'Get stronger to fight the villain' or wtv#Like okay. Natsu wants to find Igneel & Lucy wants to grow stronger but the narrative never really dove deep into either of those esp Natsu#They never went on a journey to find igneel they never focused on Lucy's powers specifically getting stronger & her legitimacy of being a#Wizard; the wizard thing was already resolved by the time phantom lord arc was at its mid point i think & yes she grows stronger#but its not like shes been singled out as The Wizard that the audience has to root for#the entire damn team AND guild are more focused on whatever job / quest theyre pick out next & whatever threats currently happening#im pretty sure 100 years quest was the first & only time where it was turned into an actual 'Walk around the world go on an adventure' thing#Its really less about the world more about the characters and I think a lot of people keep forgetting that#like if it wanted to show you what creatures exist what plants there what the political climate of the country(/ies) are like#Mashima wouldn't have made the guild a PLACE they can return to. Physically.#He wouldnt have made it a place where everyone returns to before & after every quest; it wouldve wasted the time you could use to#roam around the world like cmon... the guild cant even walk like that tavern & pig from 7ds & its not like these people are in a highschool#or like forced to stay in FT yk. They could leave 👍 But they dont at least the main chars dont#but whatever sure the world buildings lacking okay.#nillas
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Could you write a drabble for Mikoto and Shidou plus Blood? This request miiight be inspired by the fact that Mikoto mentions his body hurting a lot but doesn't seem to be receiving any medical treatment, either because Mahiru and Fuuta take priority or because there's no obvious cause, and therefore cure, to his pain...
👀👀👀 Thank you, this is such a good combo ough!! It's so interesting how much focus the others get when it comes to physical health, since Mikoto has clearly complained of his condition :( It looks like Milgram is trying to push the idea that he's completely oblivious to his alters, but I spun it where he's aware, just deep in denial. So have some Mikoto angst to get us hyped for Double!
Mikoto should be grateful. He was lucky. That’s what he kept repeating to himself. He had both of his eyes intact. Both his arms. He was strong enough to walk around freely. He wasn’t on the verge of death, or collapse. Thus, he should be grateful no one was offering him any help, because it meant he didn’t need it. He repeated it again. Maybe this time he would believe it.
With a groan, his body rolled out of bed. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d woken up actually feeling rested. Everything ached. His muscles tightened with soreness. His throat felt as raw as his knuckles, though he hadn’t been using either. He had no desire to lift his arms over his head, or twist around too much, so he didn’t change out of yesterday’s uniform. Maybe the belts and buckles had made it difficult to sleep. The theory wasn’t a convincing one, but dwelling on things like that had never gotten him anywhere.
He ran his fingers once through his hair, combing out a bit of the mess. Looking in a mirror was the last thing he needed. He made his way to the dining hall.
The others trickled in for breakfast. His appetite, at least, hadn’t suffered. He hardly noticed the others giving him wide-eyed stares. What were they expecting? Of course he was looking worse for wear, given the circumstances. He ignored them, glad to focus on the hot meal before him.
A hand weighed heavy on his shoulder.
“Mikoto,” Shidou’s voice may have remained calm, but it was urgent. “Do you need some help?”
“Huh?” He shrugged his hand away, offering a weak smile. “I’m fine! Oh, I think Kazui was saving a seat for you over there, if you --”
“-- How about we go to my cell for a moment? Or yours, if that would be more comfortable.”
What was everyone’s problem this morning? Mikoto did his best to keep his voice pleasant. “Really, man, I’m good.”
Shidou’s expression remained unmoving. Very carefully, he informed him, “you’re bleeding. Pretty badly by the look of it. You’re coming with me.”
Mikoto blinked. He looked over his shoulder, following Shidou’s gaze. The back of his uniform was torn across the center. A significant splotch of blood seeped into the material, growing even larger as he shifted to see it.
“...Oh…”
Back in Shidou’s cell, sad to have left his breakfast plate behind, he slumped into a chair. Shidou gathered together some supplies. As always, he got right to the point. “What happened?”
“I… I’m not sure. I don’t remember anything from last night. I don’t remember most nights, recently. I know that sounds crazy, but…”
“It’s fine. I have definitely heard crazier.” He smiled, something gentle and reassuring. As usual, there was something hidden behind his eyes. It was as if he already knew what Mikoto was up to late at night that earned him so much soreness the following days. He didn’t offer an explanation, though. Mikoto didn’t press him for one.
He winced as he was helped out of his uniform. Removing his shirt revealed the mysterious gash. Shidou’s eyes widened at the array of scratches and scars. Some were fresh, but most originated long before Milgram. Though he didn’t ask, Mikoto answered.
“I’m pretty clumsy, huh?” Maybe this time he would believe it.
Shidou was kind enough to pretend to. “Here, allow me…”
Shidou got to work cleaning and dressing the injuries. Mikoto closed his eyes. Even though the disinfectant stung, and sometimes those gloved fingers pressed a little two hard, it felt nice to have things patched up.
“Is there anything else going on? Are you feeling pain anywhere else?”
Mikoto could have laughed. He didn’t. “I’m just sore. And my head’s been killing me, but I’m used to migraines. Perks of the verdict, I’m sure.”
Shidou hummed in thought.
“Thanks, by the way. I’ll try to be more careful.” Not that he had much choice in the matter, it seemed. But he’d do his best.
Shidou kept his face straight, but there were traces of pain in his voice. “I will too. I’m sorry, Mikoto. If I had known… I’ve been distracted lately, but I should have paid closer attention.”
“It’s fine,” he flashed a grin. “I know the others are pretty fucked up. And I’m not dying or anything. I’m lucky, you know?”
“I wouldn’t say so. Doctors don’t only treat the dying.”
Mikoto frowned.
It didn’t take much longer to finish treatment. Shidou gave him a few instructions about the bandages, then offered him a clean shirt. “You’re good to go. I’ll be checking in more often, now. I’ll see if I can find something for your head.”
“Thanks. Really.”
He returned Mikoto’s torn uniform. “You should talk to Es about getting a new one. Until then, you’ll want to clean this with --”
Mikoto waved a dismissive hand, heading out of the cell. “Don’t worry, I know how to wash blood out of my clothes. Er, that sounds bad. I’m just a clutz, yeah? The blood’s always been my own.”
Maybe this time he would believe it.
#milgram#mikoto kayano#shidou kirisaki#im so fucked up over mikotos state rn :(( im pretty sure his vd is going to melt me into a little puddle on the floor on wednesday#id need to do more research on what doctors are supposed to do but i think shidou knows mikoto is in denial and wants him to work through#the realization on his own first instead of forcing it on him - and telling him wont stop the late night rampages in his cell#and youre right - theres not an easy cure for the stress headaches and all that anyway so theres only so much he can do#but yeah itd make sense that shidou (and the others) were genuinely too busy with the 12yo and dying patients to notice his condition...#sorry for having a shirtless mikoto moment 😭 i didnt want to pull a meme but it was needed for the prompt 😤#i kept it in mikotos pov but when shidou mentions what doctors do hes having an internal crisis about if hes a good doctor rip#i do think mikoto only had one victim but still got into fights and stuff sometimes - hence others' blood on his clothes in the past#thank you so much for the request!!#the double hype has been Consuming me asdfsdf so this was a ton of fun to write ;-;#drabbles
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Well tonight was not as great. Puppy just would not settle, just got overtired and bitey, so I put them in their crate so they could remember how to not be a piranha. We'll go on one last little potty walk (cold as fuck and they already pooped god bless), but then I think we're going to bed. I am genuinely beyond tired I'm shocked I'm still conscious
#sorry puppy 😭#i need to see a dr about this chronic exhaustion because its really annoying#falling asleep while driving should not be something that happens to me as much as it does#brother i can fall asleep doing anything and that really shouldnt be the case#16 weeks#im always trying to find the threshold of understimulated puppy / overtired puppy#theres a good medium in there where we work with each other and training is a breeze and playtime is super fun and focused#but im not sure when i need to offer more stimulation and when to take it away
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please take as much time as you need to rest and recover. burn out is so hard and takes so much to heal from. your art and your supporters will still be here when you get back :) take care <3
Thank you very much
Unfortunately, my situation doesn't really allow me to take the time I need. I've got a ~two month hiatus scheduled for my midseason, but much like my first hiatus I'll most likely be working double time during it...
It's unfortunate because I could really really use a bigger break!
Having the time and flexibility to work on other projects really fires me up and keeps me going, and being able to take a guilt free day off for family and friends is necessary to my mental health, and I've been having to turn people down lately...
This is a very kind message, and I'm sorry to vent in response! But I just feel transparency about the pressure I'm under is necessary and important. I'd love to take the time I really need, but due to deadlines and that pesky "needing money to live" I can't.
But, once the series is over I intend to take a pretty big break before I start whatever I'm doing next! I've got so many short stories and projects planned that I want so badly to get to, I can't wait to really get to truly dive in to them!
#im so sorry to take a nice message and respond like this! but just... trust me haha i know my supporters are genuinely here for me <3#but webtoon... not so much unfortunately. i mean im sure i could take a longer break but theres the looming anxiety#that ill get in trouble or itll ruin my chances of working with them again etc etc#i took this week and i genuinely took it off. sort of? i flew to a convention which was exhausting#and i did paintings that i hope to print eventually#and i. started planning and prepping for a Kickstarter. for time and time again...#so ive still been working the whole time. but i love working!#i just... like to be able to work on things OTHER than time and time again...#and unfortunately for a few months. more than a few months. i haven't been able to do anything outside of it.#even all of my paintings have been for it cause i cant afford to switch my mindset!#my first hiatus i moved. worked on a pitch for my next series. and then i made two episodes a week the entire time#and i still ran out of episodes...#i dont know if im just not fast enough or if something is wrong with my brain that i have to fight to get it to focus but.#yeah i mean ive been burned out! been really burned out for like a year now#i can tell by how much better i feel after literally 1 week of doing anything else#and how tired i feel explaining this and knowing ive got another 3 months before i get another break#ok sorry i vented a lot more in the tags. it's hard to explain all of this eloquently and i like my posts to be somewhat professional#asks#anon#vent#delete later#and also how often my brain keeps wanting me to like. beg for 'nice words' from other people#(i always stop myself from asking people for compliments and stuff because otherwise i get very carried away and do it too regularly)#(people are very nice to me all the time. the kindness is endless and i need to let myself recognize and appreciate it rather than seek more#(its sort of a mental health thing I've been trying to like... force myself to do)#(for myself and my longevity but also for others sake lol. ive been bad about it in the past)
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The meower
#Queued... technically March 23rd?#I mean its march 22nd in oregon. but im not there rn lolz#either way im late. SORRY !! i forfor to queue on the 20th then i was on planes for like 21 hrs total#well no 5 of those were a layover @ the airport but#ANYWAYYYYY hi future me !!!#Howww was the trip? im on my first (second actually- its 4am of the second day if u coukd the arrival) day in Hong Kong#Its rlly hot and humid so I think im gonna die. BUT ITS ALSO SUPER COOL !!#Even just from the few hours I had out earlier its amazingggg. The lights and the buildings are so cool and theres such a fun but chaotic#atmosphere - idk if its just bcs its a big city or specific to HK?#I loveee large cities in general. New york. Tokyo. HK. thats all of the ones ive been to ig#I havent seen even close to all of HK. Im in central rn but we're goin to other parts later#Dad says the other parts are totally different- Like theres LOADS of gisnt buildings here (WAY MORE THAN U SEE IN ******!!! u know that tho#and theyre almost all residential of the ones I passed. Im sure theres offices n stuff i just didnt see them in the likd 20 minutes cab#ride lolz. U know all tuis already tho#ig what im getting at is HOW WAS THE TRIP !!!!! How was the rest of HK? WHAT WAS KYOTO LIKE??#augh soo many cool things.....#Also also !! Have you learned any mire katakana?#ive JUST learned the vowel line so maybe u lesrned the k line now too?#I cant imagine school is any different. OHH DID U FINISH THE M P 10P COMIC??#I started it and got abt one page done on the plane#I think it should only end up being two or three pages idk#Ohh !! Hows the new meds going !! I think u should have ur blood test done by now so do u know if it helped at all?#I hope soooooooooooo#Mm I think thats all I have to say .... NO WAIT HAVE U HUNG OUT W/ JACKIE??#i rlly want to b friends with her ^.^#Alright Thats all !! HAVE A GOOD DAYYYYYY I LOVE U#queue drop#weather report#WAIT EDIT DID THE TRIGUN VOLUME COME. HOW IS IT
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