#i dont know if im just not fast enough or if something is wrong with my brain that i have to fight to get it to focus but.

[chrispleasure]

summary: maggie interupts matt and ready getting intimate!

warnings: fluff, smut, sex !

not proofread

this was requested my an anon !

the noise of the heardboard banging against the wall is heard throughout the room, whiny moans coming out of your mouth. every time matt thrusts deeper the bed squeaks from the matress moving so much.

“mm’ baby, harder..” you moan, hands gripping his shoulders as his eyes gaze down at yours. “going as fast as you can take.” matt replies, his voice shaky from how close he is.

lustful moans escape your lips, the sounds of slapping from him pounding into you causing you to squirm. “im so close, please baby..” matt whimpers, continuing to thrust into you as you like. “just a little longer.” you reply.

matt freezes, his head snapping to look towards the baby monitor on the bedside table. “daddy? where are you?” maggie cries, her cries being picked up on the baby monitor.

he glances down at you, “could you go? i need to release.” matt asks, moving off of you to lay down on the sheets. you nod, pushing yourself up. you put on a pair of underwear, followed by a sweater.

you climb out of bed and make your way to the kids room down the hall. your eyes are met with the sight of maggie crying, and milo sleeping across the room in his bed peacefully.

“where’s daddy?” maggie sniffles, standing by the edge of the crib. you didn’t know what to say, so you make up something. “he went to go pee, mags.” you mumble, picking her up. “i dont want you! i want daddy.” maggie began to throw a tantrum, kicking her legs.

you put her down, “okay, wait right here.” you reply, walking out of the room. you walk down to the masterbedroom, peeking your head through the door. your eyes are met with the sight of matt getting dressed, the bedsheets changed.

his eyes meet yours, a smile on his lips. “did you sort her out?” he asks, walking over. “she want’s you, not me.” you sigh, rubbing your face. you had been stressed lately, so this made you feel worse.

“okay, no big deal. ill go see her now. dont stress ‘bout it.” matt replies, pressing a kiss to your forehead before making his way to the kids bedroom.

“daddy?” maggie cries, seeing matt’s figure in the doorway. “w’as wrong, mags?” he asks, fingers tapping against the crib. “i want you.” she frowns. “stay here till i fall asleep, p’ease? i scared.” maggie continued, laying down.

matt tucks maggie into sheets and turns on her night light. “nothing to be scared about, see?” he glances around the bedroom. “ill stay until you fall asleep though.” he continues, sitting down in the armchair beside her crib.

𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐬 ꨄ: it has come to my attention that i apparently ‘copied’ or ‘stole’ somebodys work. which i didn’t, i gave credits and still, it wasn’t enough. no one owns the idea that i happened to write about. for example, no ones getting upset about everyone doing ‘text messages ___ would send you’ since it’s been a trend for so long so i dont see how it’s a problem. and i will be doing it again because i like the idea. and i dont mind if people also use the idea, because im not mean. not starting anything, just expect that if your gonna write on this app people are going to like your ideas and use them whether you like it or not ❤️

taglist: @sturnobsessedwh0re @matthewsroses

[deoidesign]

please take as much time as you need to rest and recover. burn out is so hard and takes so much to heal from. your art and your supporters will still be here when you get back :) take care <3

Thank you very much

Unfortunately, my situation doesn't really allow me to take the time I need. I've got a ~two month hiatus scheduled for my midseason, but much like my first hiatus I'll most likely be working double time during it...

It's unfortunate because I could really really use a bigger break!

Having the time and flexibility to work on other projects really fires me up and keeps me going, and being able to take a guilt free day off for family and friends is necessary to my mental health, and I've been having to turn people down lately...

This is a very kind message, and I'm sorry to vent in response! But I just feel transparency about the pressure I'm under is necessary and important. I'd love to take the time I really need, but due to deadlines and that pesky "needing money to live" I can't.

But, once the series is over I intend to take a pretty big break before I start whatever I'm doing next! I've got so many short stories and projects planned that I want so badly to get to, I can't wait to really get to truly dive in to them!

[widevibratobitch]

ive been havin a worrisome amount of Gender Thoughts in the last few weeks. or months even. im this close to just shaving off my eyebrows completely. i need to do Something. i need Change. and therapy.

[theood]

.

[hecksupremechips]

Had a very bad day Gotta eat gravel

[lightnotyagami]

"Do you think you'll kill for me one day?"

"Yes, of course i will my dear."

Light x fem reader (soft) smut

A/n:remeber when L put cameras into lights room? When i was like 14 or 15 i read a smut FF like this and OH MY GOD its still in my head. Coudnt find the ogs @ but if i ever do ilysm🙏 (it was on ao3 if anyone wants to help me find it😭)

Summary: L puts cameras into lights room.. great.. but what do normal people his age do? Hang out with friends, do homework.. and some other things.

Tw/cw: my horrible english, soft smut (duh) , being watched, tell me if i missed anything!!

"Are we seriously going to do this?" You asked him still in a safe distance from his house. "Yeah, wanna back out?" He said as he looked at you like you were stupid. "No! I'm just saying, I don't know about the whole... thing." You voiced as he answered with a shrug like what you said wasn't a big deal to him. "Look," he said walking towards you with his hands in the pockets of his jeans. "I'll take care of it, okay? you just relax and lay down." Your mind went crazy thinking about all the things that could go wrong. "So, are you in yes or no?" He stopped right in front of you and looked directly into your eyes. His face was close enough for you to smell the mint from his breath. 'It felt different being so close to someone, I mean I didn't feel threatened by his appearance, just like when we were fighting but this time I could see how beautiful he really is...' you thought to yourself "fine." "Good girl."

*later in his room*

'64 cameras.' you thought to yourself as you sat yourself on the bed and light on his chair. "hey light!" the door was shot open revealing his little sister, sayu was her name? "mom asked if you want anything from the supermarkt, oh and does Y/n want something too?" she asked now looking at you "oh no dear its fine! you two make yourselves a great day" you answered. "Okay, dont be mad then if we dont bring extra snacks" she winked at making your laugh slightly. 'i wish i had a younger sister' you thought to yourself "okay mom says bye." Sayu said closing the door behind her, leaving only you and light. oh and the 64 cameras from every angle of course. The lights were dimmed making everything look more mysterious. "you want anything?" Light asked turning around to look at you. "no... thanks its okay." you answered looking at the ground embarassed as he sat besides you ."it's alright babe, come sit over here." he patted on his lap. You slowly moved your legs closer to him sitting on his lap. he pulled you closer so that your head was on his chest and his arms were wrapped around you. Everything was going after Plan but why did this still feel so..weird? you dont know if L is the only one watching this. you could only hope. you closed your eyes trying enjoying his touch and warmth as he kissed you softly. "let me show you something, babe." you hummed in response. His fingers which were playing with the ends of your hair slowly moved up to your body . "your heart is beating so fast" he whispered in your ear, causing you to shiver slightly. It sent an electrical jolt through your spine, it was almost painful but good. your heart started hammering in your chest as he pushed your t-shirt up exposing your bra and sofly pushing you down on the bed climbing on top of you. you moaned as he started kissing you softly on your neck, moving it from side to side, leaving small red marks "l-light~!" you whined not sure what to do as he started to unhook your bra , slowly peeling it off your body.

*at the headquarters*

"mister Soichiro Yagami, i belive you would like to leave the room?" L said as soichiro looked at the computers not sure if to ignore this ever happaned or to kill light when hes back home. "yes im sorry i just.." he said as he walked out of the room in complete shock that his son was capable of these things. "anyways. Im bluring the cameras now. Watari unblur them when this is done and a cheese cake would also be nice "

[eatmyassssssssz]

Captain John Price

warnings : age gap implied

tags : @lillianastuff @mysticalgalaxysalad @mionacaped @madamemelancholysstuff @mactavishwritings @chaos-reigns-bitches @scribblescubbs @wandasbitch22 @warzxx @wretched-horn-monger @yippeerrrs @applbottmjeens @bowieisbored @blingblong55 @simonrileyscockring

old man price who struggles to come, he can get it up, but he struggles to come, takes him ages.

hes retired by the military by now, youre his little house husband/wife.

you started to realise you guys have sex a lot less. and when you do, its not really sex. he doesnt get anything out of it. he always makes you come, then goes straight to aftercare.

you worry, maybe he's stopped being attracted to you as he got older. maybe his taste has changed.

you overthink one night, hes fast asleep next to you, snoring. you cant sleep, youre trying not to be too loud with your crying and hyperventilating so you dont awaken your husband (although, nothing could wake up that damn man).

then, you snap. you shake him. until he wakes up. you needed to ask him why he wouldnt have sex with you, when he had a pretty high sex drive a year ago!

was it because you put on a pound or two because of christmas incoming?

either way, hes awake, sat up, half asleep, looking at his partner, having a borderline panic attack next to him.

"whats-, whats wrong?" he says, hurriedly rubbing his eyes to get the sleep out him eyes at least a little.

"why dont you like me anymore!" bit blunt, but you weren't thinking very straight right now, you needed answers, and now.

no matter what the answer was, you needed closure. you needed something to let you decide what you needed to do.

was the "problem" you, or did he just fall out of love?

"what- what do you even mean?" he genuinely did not get what you meant.

"youve not had proper sex with me in ages!" you say, rushed, words not going through your head properly.

his face fades. a soft pink spreads up his neck and ears. "so, its about that.." he mutters.

"am i not attractive enough for you to fuck me anymore? you make me come, then skip the part when you get off, and we go straight to aftercare!" tears were rushing down your face, you hiccuped as you spoke.

"babe- its not you, its me." he says, face in his palm.

"please- nonono, i cant afford for us to split up! i love you- and, and- i dont have any qualifications, i didnt go to college so we could be together forever, john!" your head was rushing to conclusions, your breathing was fast, choked and panicked.

"no! nono, i dont want to split up- i...what i meant was, i literally- it is me thats the problem. i can't- yknow...come." his voice was low, his fingers were massaging his temples, his face was red with embarrassment over this.

"...youre joking? thats why we've not had sex? i thought you were fucking someone else and had nothing left for me or something!" you were relieved, to say the least. "no- babe, i would never."

you nod. "i know- i just..overthink." you admit. he nods. "im aware.." you smile softly. he did know you well. "so..you cant come?" you ask.

he mumbles a response, "i can- just takes...a while...yknow? i can still get hard like i used too- just...not come easily." you smirk hearing that. "so...its possible you can come, just takes a minute?"

"yup."

"..you wanna try that theory?"

[mysicklove]

i had the most unhinged thought and raced to your inbox because i need this demon expelled from my body asap. hawks coming home from the worst day of patrol, everything went wrong and he had to speak up at a press conference, play the part of perfect, and all he wants is to melt into your touch. you can see it in his eyes, the dark circles, and the weary tilt of his smile. "baby bird," his voice is hoarse, "need you to hurt me tonight," so he can finally unravel. you're the only one he wants to be perfect for. okay goodbyeee 💀

𝐔𝐍𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐕𝐀𝐒

Pairing: Masochist! Hawks x Gn! Sadist! Reader

CW: face slapping, lots of blood, cock stepping, kicking, bruising, cock slapping, heavy degration, loss of air, mean reader, tons and tons of tears, scratching, mouth spitting, no mention of safe word but keep in mind it is there !!!

A/N: anon im sorry i totally changed ur thing, i just saw masochist hawks and sprinted. the demons wrote this, not me. dont look at me everyone. HEED THE TAGS

it was a way to blow off steam. something that he looks forward to, just some time where he doesn't have to think anymore. only feeling he has the stinging sensations and the tears that prick his eyes. it was an embaressing obsession he had. he loved pain.

Keigo walks to the bedroom, his hero costume tattered, and dark circles under his eyes. he is exhausted, but coming to you for your touch. pulling you close to him, and mumbling into your neck how bad he wants you to hurt him. till he bruises and bleeds. till every thought just disappears except for you.

and so you pull away, and slap him. it makes him tumble backward, and his yellow glasses fall off. he touches the tingling feeling on his face, blood spilling out from the skin caught on your wedding ring. you dont let up, sending another loud smack across his face, and this time he does fall to the ground, landing on his ass.

tears prick at his eyes, and he can feel his lip tear open. the taste of blood coats his mouth and he gulps, looking up at you for more.

he feels your foot jab onto his clothed cock and he keens, wincing up at you. "w-wait," he stutters, throwing his head back when your press even harder. "fuck!"

"wait? you want me to wait? after you begged for it like a dog?" he is squirming under you, tears now streaming down his face as you dig your foot into his pants.

"'m sorry. sorry—you are going to kill me!" he pleads, hands trying to dig themself into the carpet to fight back against the pain.

you sigh, and let up, instead using your foot to push at his chest, causing him to fall over and onto his back. "take off your clothes, Keigo," you mumble, taking a seat on the bed with crossed legs and staring down at him.

"okay. okay. I will. Just give me a minute!" he pants, tearing off his jacket and shirt as fast as he can. he knows something is coming, you werent playing nice.

you dont give him enough time, he reaches for his pants, and without hesitation you slam your foot into his stomach. he goes tumbling backwards and lands on his side, curling into a ball and panting. his eyes are wide and he is gripping onto his adomen. it surely will leave a huge bruise tomorrow. but thats not what he is worried about, he cant breathe.

"awww, did you get the wind knocked out of you? that's what happens when you move too slow," you tease, as you take in his appearance. he trembles in front of you, looking up at you in fear. tears drip down his cheeks and onto the ground, as he tries and fails to catch his breath.

you giggle at him, padding over to him. he flinches at the footsteps, bracing himself for another kick, but you just begin to unbutton his pants, pulling them down. "useless thing, arent you. cant follow any directions," you coo, now tearing off his boxers.

his cock springs out, tip red and leaking pre cum. "such a pervert! you sick fuck, keigo. who gets hard from getting beat?" you land another slap to his thigh, and his whole body jerks.

you smile at the red handprint, glancing back at him to see him beginning to drool. its coated red from the blood from his cheek and lip. he's is still heaving from the kick, eyes wide, and body gasping for oxygen.

"say Hawks do you get turned on when you are losing against villains? pop a boner like a freak for anyone who hits you?"

his eyes flash to you and he is shaking his head desperately. his words are breathless, "no. no. 'm not a freak!"

a quick, but harsh slap to his cock. he jumps again, globs of tears falling quicker. "fuckkkkk," he whimpers, shaking his head back and forth. his whole body shakes, and fingers dig into his own skin.

"you liar! do you want to be kicked again?"

"no no no no. im sorry. im sorry! im a freak. a pervert who likes to get hit. im sorry," he sobs, reaching for your ankle for comfort. you slap it away and he hisses, rubbing the back of it with a sniffle.

but you smile at him and lean over to sit on his chest. his head is still lolled to the side and his body racks with sobs. "shhhhhhh. so whiny Keigo. thanks for admitting it. my disgusting pervert. here, a reward."

you grab his face, hard enough to bruise, and force him to look up at you. his eyes are half shut in a wince, but he tries to force them open to look at you. you pry his mouth open, lean forward, and drop a glob of spit into his mouth.

he doesnt hesitate to swallow it, opening his mouth up again and sticking his tongue out to show you its gone. "th-thank you," he whimpers, and you smile fondly at him.

you hands trail up and down his down his body, sending vicicoius red raised scratchmarks along his pretty skin. "now, pervert....what should we do to this pretty canvas?"

he grins up at you, tears still dripping, and blood staining his cheeks and lips, but still stars in his eyes. "anything."

[zhvakinnn]

They accidentally injured their s/o pt2

Warnings: angst to fluff?

Character's: Tyler, Taylor Ashlyn

Part 1: Logan, Aiden, ben

✨as always i don't know much English so if something is wrong correct me✨

Tyler Hernandez

You were all in Ashlyn's house taking his parents car keys to drive the Jeep

When we walk inside we heard a loud thud coming from the roof and you, Ben, Taylor looked and saw aiden and Ashlyn

"uh help"

When we help them tyler bust in the room saying that we should hurry up

As we got down a phantom attack you tyler was gonna attack the phantom with his weapon, only ended up hurting you

A light suddenly shine towards you causing the phantom to evaporate and tyler cutting your arm

(you still have an arm its just a big ass scar)

Tyler's eyes widen and saw aiden he was the one who light the flashlight towards you he wanna burst to anger but he was worried about you

He holds you and your arms to stop bleeding and went running to the jeep

As you all got there Taylor was driving crazy, if only I'm not injured I would scream so loud

"OPEN THE GATE"

I heard some scream as we got there tyler gave me to Ben while he puke

"what happened to her?!" Logan said looking at you, then tyler wipe her mouth

"you!" Tyler said looking at Aiden, then Aiden look at Tyler confused

"if you hadn't shine the flashlight to them they wouldn't be in this situation" tyler said starting to walk towards aiden then Taylor stopped him

"maybe his just trying to save (name) lets just calm down and go to (name)" Taylor said holding Tyler's shoulder

He grumble and nodded when he got there you were already patch up then you look up to see Tyler you stand up only him saying that you should sit down and kissed you're fore head and hug your head you let your head fall in his chest

"I'm really sorry if i was careful and not act to fast i wouldn't hurt you"

"it wasn't your fault tyler, and if you're asking for another sorry i forgave you already"

You two sat there in a comfortable silent

---------------------------------------------------

Taylor Hernandez

You two are at the top of the wall just relaxing you two were laughing, chatting you two were a perfect couple

You two were keeping an eye on the phantom until one of the light went off

'what?!' you thought then you saw a phantom going up you two were running towards the phantom while shouting

"HEY HELP THE LIGHT WENT OFF THERE ARE PHANTOM!" everyone look up and saw many of them

Everyone got they're weapon and went up while you and Taylor was struggling

Suddenly a phantom jump on Taylor causing her to fall down

"TAYLOR!"

Once you jump towards her she kick the phantom causing you to meet the back of the phantom and you well into the buses

"oh no oh no (NAME)!!"

She went down towards you hugging you then the light was fix thanks to Logan's science

"ARE YOU OK?! IM SORRY IM SORRY I'M SO-" "shh" you cut her off and telling her you were fine

"can we just.. rest my back hurts" then she noticed a scratch on your arm and face her eyes started to tear wiping you're cheeks then hugged you

You saw where she's looking earlier you had a big fat scar on your hand

Her head was on your shoulder "dont worry.. I'll be fine i promise"

She smiled and so as you

---------------------------------------------------

Ashlyn banner

She was so focused to get the jeep she hadn't noticed you

You were running behind her but as you were running a phantom attacked you pinning you down all of them got in the jeep not noticing you were left behind

You're eyes were widen when you heard the jeep start and left you

You thought they abandoned you

But as soon as they got there Ashlyn was looking for you

"(name)?..(name)?... Were are they"

They all looked around and like oh shit we left them. Ashlyn push Taylor not hard but enough to get out of her grip

"open the gates.."

"what?"

"i said open the fucking gates"

Logan nodded as he press the button then Ashlyn went inside the jeep

"w..wait you still not look feeling well-'

Taylor was cut off when Ashlyn close the door and went driving towards the gates they close the gates behind her

When she saw you she stopped the jeep and attack the phantom she kept stabbing it

When she finally got to kill it she scooped you and went to the jeep

As soon as Ashlyn got there she took the bandaids and wrapped you Taylor help her because she was shaking so hard

"please wake up please wake up" she kept mumbling hold your hand tight

Then an alarm clock was beeping she wasted no time to get ready for school even her own parents were confused as soon as she got in the bus she didn't saw you on your spot

She was panicking then a hand suddenly grab her it was Ben then he pointed were you are you were lying down

She suddenly felt relief your ok

When she sat down you felt her presence

"Taylor?" You said as you sobbed in her chest " i thought you abandon me because you hate me" your words hit her so much

Then she cupped your face " i would never abandon you I love you so much, I'm sorry i didn't notice you i really had a head ache causing me not to realize you were left behind"

She explained as you hugged her tightly "then lets rest for now"

---------------------------------------------------

Damn Ashlyn's part is so long

Masterlist | about me | rules

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not saying please/thank you?

So this is an ongoing argument with my roommate. I (22nb) am autistic, and T (55f) has ADHD.

Now to get this out of the way, i do say thank you. I was always taught to wait a moment after receiving something, take a bite or appreciate what you were given for a breath, before thanking someone so that you could add something more to it. My roommate and I both agree that i do say thank you the vast majority of the time, but the problem for her is that i do not say it fast enough.

T often gives me a "tHaNk yOu" while the item in question is still being passed. This seems ridiculous to me as i haven't even been fully given it yet.

In addition, i have the dishes as my household chore, and i do them daily, despite almost never making any dishes myself. I do this to both support T and her diet, as well as contribute to the household that i live in.

T thanks me near daily for doing the dishes. This always seems weird and unnecessary to me, as it is my responsibility. I have told her this. I dont expect to be thanked for doing my own laundry, after all. In return, T gets upset that i dont notice and thank her for taking out the garbage/recycling/compost, to which she is the main contributor to and is under her responsibilities.

As for please: i do say this much more rarely. I think it feels overly preformative and fake, and i typical choose more "would you mind closing my door for me" "if its not too much of a hassle, could you toss me my waterbottle" "id appreciate it if you could preheat the oven while you're in the kitchen"

I think that these work perfectly fine as a replacement. Please just has always felt wrong and fake. No one else in my entire life has ever commented on this before.

Thirdly; T has been upset that i don't respond to her apologies appropriately. After she is snappy at me (due to her emotional disregulation from ADHD) (last time it was because i asked if she was using the oven instead of asking if i could use the oven myself, for reference) there is a 50/50 shot that she will come and apologize.

I dont often accept apologies. Apologies are for the person saying them to get it off their chests, or to make you put it behind them. Usually, ill say something like "it was just one of those days, y'know?" Or "its alright, water under the bridge"

Because i was always taught that apologies came with a promise of change, and T can't (or won't) change how she re-directs her frustration at unrelated things to things ive done "wrong". When she told me the correct response was "i forgive you", i decided to not engage instead of telling her directly that i didnt forgive her (because i am certain she will do it again). (I usually dont engage with her when shes irritated: she never notices and just wants to say her piece so im not being rude here)

She said that i was being disrespectful, "like always", and when i suggested it may be more difficult for me due to my autism, she said that we made plenty of accommodations for me (which i think is false), and that i just needed to do this for her comfort. That please/thank yous were something she needed to feel appreciated and i should be making more accommodations for her.

To me, i feel like she is getting really caught up on semantics and is being a little controlling about it. But maybe its just a boundary? I dont know if i could commit to changing my language for her though, i feel like i will just start forgetting after awhile because it feels so fake. Shouldn't it be better for me to say things genuinely than just for her approval?

AITA for not saying please/thank you?

[the-karma-cafe]

Medium honor Arthur picks up character but it’s for a crime she didn’t do! Oh and outdoorsy love stuff

a/n: omg ok i dont know what you mean by outdoorsy love stuff is that SEX or is that FLUFF (im giving you both) thank you for the request !!

warnings: DID NOT PROOFREAD, sex (hell no !!!), spanking, he's a little mean but not really (as medium honor usually goes), mildly dubious consent

Warm | Arthur Morgan

It was the age-old story of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. When I discovered Mrs. Braithwaite on the floor一thick, wine-red blood pooled beneath her chest一I’d barely had a second to react before one of her sons screamed, tackling me to the ground. His fingers were bruising against my arms, shaking me, asking what the fuck was the matter with me, telling me I’d fucking swing for this. 

I don’t even remember how I got away from him, slamming something into his skull and breaking free from that iron grip, leaping off the balcony without a second thought.

It was only miles away on one of their prized horses did it finally hit me that whatever case I’d had to defend myself with was long gone. I wouldn’t be able to show my face in Rhodes again一or really anywhere else一with a high-profile family like the Braithwaites on my ass.

I kept riding further north, hoping to put as much distance between me and that damn corpse as possible. Of all the people, it had to be her, and it had to be me. 

By the time I reached Valentine, I’d felt more sorry for myself than I had in a long time. Thanked my lucky stars I always kept my money on me and bought some supplies there to… well, live on the lam, I supposed. 

But for the first couple nights, I moped. Stayed in the saloon every morning and the hotel every night一not much else to do in a livestock town. 

When I felt a bit better, I sold the Braithwaite horse. It was big and proud and all sorts of attention-grabbing. I bought a different one一drab and small, but fast. 

Sooner than I thought, the news had travelled. A new bounty poster was slapped right on the wooden post outside the saloon, my sketchy reflection glaring back at me. MURDEROUS MAID. 

I pursed my lips. They could’ve spared me the alliteration.

Tore it down, stuffed it in my bag, and left town. Wouldn’t take long for a small town like Valentine to put two and two together. 

The bounty was nothing to sneeze at. I was almost flattered. Wanted alive, $500. I figured it’d take a lot to deter bounty hunters from $500, so I took to the mountains. It was likely just a matter of time, but by god was I going to make them work for it.

Now, here I was, having found some barn to hole up in, next to the remains of a torched homestead (I’d briefly picked through it and rescued a dented can of peaches and a lock box holding some fancy necklace). Would’ve preferred the house, but shelter was shelter. Peaches (affectionately named after said can) seemed to like it in here, at least.

“You want one, boy?” I held one out to where he sat a foot or so away from me. For only having just met me, he was a sweet horse, resting his head on my lap while I slept, following me around while I hunted (although I quickly found he loved to scare off game, and it took a lot of convincing to get him to just stay put, goddammit).

Peaches leaned his big head forward and sniffed at the proffered fruit. To my surprise, he snorted and turned away from it, flicking back his ears and giving me a severe side-eye. “What!” I laughed, bringing it back away from him. “Now you tell me.”

He huffed out of his nose, like it should have been quite obvious, thank you very much. I giggled and continued to eat, idly watching the flame flicker in one of the lanterns hung from the ceiling. 

I eventually drifted off to sleep, still not any closer to figuring out my future than I was a month ago.

The next morning, I ventured back into the wilderness to hunt. So far, I’d been a bit less successful than I’d hoped, but I had done well enough for myself. 

I breathed out slowly, my arm steadily following the movements of a buck a couple yards away. My breath puffed out white in front of me, warming my nose. This was the closest I’d ever gotten to game this big.

The buck lowered its head, nosing past the snow to the damp grass below. I kept my arrow aimed above, where I knew its head would return. A breath in. C’mon…

It raised its head, staring off to its right somewhere, and I stretched back the string, my grip still a bit wobbly against its force. Another breath out. 

A whisk of air whooshed over me, and I startled, releasing my grip on the arrow. It flew a couple feet away before planting headfirst into the snow. Something forcibly tightened around my torso, crushing my arms against my sides. What the hell?! I yelped in surprise and wobbled from my perch, falling backwards.

My head dented the snow behind me, sending it down my collar and into my hair, freezing my neck and ears. “Ahh!” I struggled against the coil around me, simultaneously flinching away from the cold now assaulting my warm skin.

Footsteps crunched over to me, and an upside-down face and chest soon came into view. He looked down at me with a pleased expression on his face, or at least it seemed like it, it was hard to tell behind that high collar and tipped hat. 

He rounded to my front and his gloved hands yanked at the rope, pulling me slightly up from the snow to face him better. He squinted at my face, now surely pinkened from the snow I could still see on my lashes. His chest rumbled with approval, and he nodded, more to himself than me. “Thought so.”

“What?” I exhaled, staring up at him dumbly. 

He cracked a smile, and this time I could tell. “The murderous maid, I take it?” 

My blood ran cold. Oh, fuck. I had almost forgotten, tucked away in this silent, snowy haven. 

Apparently my expression was all it took to confirm things for him. His smile turned to a smirk and he tugged at the rope, bringing me up to stand. I instinctively pushed away from him, but he held me firmly to him, his arms thick and strong (my god this man was big). He looped the rope around me again before tying it securely at my front. 

Then, he promptly threw me over his shoulder and began to walk. 

“Let me go!!” I thrashed from my perch, kicking at him. 

He growled and tightened his grip on my thighs. “Kick me again and I'll make you regret it, girl.”

A fearful whimper slipped past my lips and I stilled. 

“That’s what I thought,” he grunted, but his grip didn’t loosen. 

He whistled, loud and sharp, and I heard the familiar sound of hooves approaching. The image of Peaches by himself in the barn flitted through my head.

“Um, mister?” I whispered, my tone timid and polite. The tone I used to use with the Braithwaites. 

He heaved a sigh, annoyed with me. “What.”

I bit my lip. I didn’t want to anger him further. “My… my horse. He’s in a barn nearby, I don’t want him to be stuck up here all by himself.”

He didn’t respond to that. I grimaced. If I’d kept the Braithwaite horse at least he would’ve saved it to sell it一Peaches was likely barely worth the walk to a man like him.

His horse slowed to a stop nearby, and the man none-too-gently threw me over its back. I winced, feeling its butt dig into my stomach. 

The bounty hunter made quick work of me, tying my legs together and then securing me to his horse. He patted my thigh, “Comfy?” I could almost hear the smug look on his face.

“More ’n ever.” I grumbled, mostly to myself. He barked a laugh and pulled away from me, leaving me cold. He mounted up on his horse and began to ride.

I couldn’t see much from my “seat,” but I began to vaguely recognize the path he followed.

“Are you…” I started, my voice quiet. I turned my head to look up at him, and raised my voice. “Are you goin’ back for him?”

He didn’t answer, and made no move to indicate he had even heard me. 

Not wanting to push my luck (or Peaches’), I stayed quiet.

Sure enough, we reached that barn and he dismounted. When he returned, Peaches was in tow, neighing happily when he saw me.

I laughed brightly despite the situation. “Hey, boy!!” The bounty hunter released his reins and Peaches bounded up to me, nuzzling and snorting into my hair wetly. I giggled and tried to move my head away. “Oh my god, Peaches, gross.”

“Peaches?” the man echoed, a note of disbelief coloring his tone.

I turned and smiled up at him. “What?”

He shook his head, gesturing to the horse. “Ain’t he a boah?”

“So?” 

He snorted, but didn’t answer me, instead mounting back up on his horse. My smile faded from my face as we continued. My last days of freedom.

I stayed quiet as we rode, figuring that was the best way to get on his good side (I didn’t need to get smacked for yapping). The horse’s gait made me feel sick enough that I didn’t want to, anyway, its back poking into me, alternating between every corner of my stomach with each step.

Eventually, the snow began to taper off down the path, though a chill still hung in the air. I shivered, the back of my jacket still wet and cold against my neck. The sky was beginning to darken, subtly and colorlessly as winter skies often did. 

Wordlessly, the bounty hunter turned us off the path and into the trees, likely seeking some spot to set up camp for the night. Peaches followed dutifully behind us, although he seemed to have sobered a bit, as if sensing my discomfort. 

He must have found a spot he liked, as he dismounted and reached by my side for his tent and bedroll. He pulled them off and got to work setting everything up. 

I felt my eyelids droop, my body finally able to relax with the horse stopped. 

Not ten minutes later, I was jolted awake by hands grabbing me off of the horse and hoisting me up. I made a small noise of surprise in my throat, feeling him drop me back onto his shoulder, carrying me over to his makeshift camp. Truthfully, I had thought he’d just leave me on his horse for the night. 

I wasn’t sure if this was better or worse.

The bounty hunter dropped me to the ground by the fire, and I huffed, adjusting myself to sit upright. The warmth wafting off of it confirmed that this was definitely better than being stuck on that horse all night. I leaned closer to it, and made to bring my hands up, but was cruelly reminded of the ropes keeping them by my sides. I heaved a sigh.

A bottle appeared in my vision. I blinked down at it in confusion, before looking up at the man who held it. “Whiskey?” I prompted.

“If there’s any time to drink, it’d be now.” He nudged the lip of the bottle closer to my mouth.

I held his gaze for a moment longer before turning to it. “…Can’t argue with that.” I pressed my lips against it. He lightly tipped the bottle, letting a good mouthful flow past my lips. I choked it down, then another, then another, then another, before finally wrenching my face from it, coughing. “Jesus!”

He laughed, corking it and tucking it into his satchel. He knelt down behind me and I felt a pressure on the ropes before they snapped away. I brought my arms forward slowly, rubbing my hands over them. He stood and rounded the fire, plopping down on the other side of it. I looked up at him in confusion.

He grinned. “Gave you enough whiskey that even if you try to hop away,” He paused, his grin turning wolfish, “You won’t get far.” He stretched out languidly, finally allowing himself to relax. 

Heat crept up my neck, flustered at his reasoning. “You just get all your bounties drunk?” I spluttered.

He shrugged.

I huffed, holding out my hands towards the fire to warm them. “Creep.”

“I ain’t the one goin’ around killin’ old ladies.” He retorted.

I threw my hands in the air in exasperation. “I didn’t kill her!” 

“Sure sounds like you did.”

I raked my hand through my hair. “Why the hell would I kill the woman payin’ me to live?” I met his gaze again. 

He didn’t seem very sympathetic. Another shrug. “Lots of people wanna kill their boss.”

“Not me!”

He snorted. “I’m shoah.”

I shook my head at the fire, deflating. “I had it made working for her. Easy work, good pay, didn’t really have to talk to anyone, and,” I shrugged my shoulders, “best part of having a lady boss is she won’t let the men get away with being terrible to you.”

He stayed quiet, and I felt myself ramble more, “I mean, sure, she was a miserable old hag, mean ’n sour, but as long as you stayed out of her way and did your job, she was cordial enough.” The image of her on the ground flicked through my mind. “Shit.” I pressed my palms into my eyes, wiling them to cast it from my brain. “Can’t believe this is how it ends.”

The drink began to encroach further into my head, making my thoughts hazy. I cursed again under my breath, the reality of the situation truly, truly, settling in. This was it for me. Swinging from a rope for a crime I didn’t commit. 

“You really didn’t do it.” 

I scoffed, not meeting his eyes. “Been sayin’ that, haven’t I?”

“…That you have.” 

Silence fell between us once more, each left with our thoughts. It felt nice to be believed by at least one person before the end. 

A gust of wind blew by, and I shivered, reminded of the wet coat I was still shrouded in. I glanced over the fire at the bounty hunter, but he didn’t look up, eyes hidden under his hat.

“...Mister?”

He raised his head, and that piercing gaze met mine. I faltered, almost losing my voice to it.  

He heaved a great sigh. “…Arthur.”

“What?”

He sighed, raising his hat momentarily to rake a hand through his hair before placing it back down again. “Call me Arthur.”

I smiled softly in spite of myself. “Okay.”

“…And what did you need?” Arthur prompted, as I had already forgotten. Perhaps he was right about that whiskey.

I rubbed my hands on my arms. “Do you have any… drier clothes I could wear?”

He nodded, pushing up from the ground. I watched him make his way over to his saddlebag, watched him rifle through it for something dry. 

It had to be the whiskey. Or that he was the first to believe me. Or that he was really the first person I’d seen in weeks.

His back was just so… broad. My eyes followed how the muscles underneath his shirt moved, following his arms’ movements. My mind helpfully supplied how one of those big arms felt wrapped around my thighs, how that big hand felt patting my thigh, so close to…

He turned around, and I forcefully muted my thoughts, spreading a polite smile on my face. He made his way back to me, some bunched up garment in hand. I began to shrug off my coat, struggling with it as it snagged on my undershirt and held tight to my shoulders. 

Arthur watched me try to figure it out, but eventually I just gave up, so fatigued from the day that I just didn’t care anymore. He chuckled, kneeling down next to me. “Outsmart you, did it?”

I rolled my eyes and sighed. “I’ll deal with it in a second,” I offered a small smile, “Thank you.” 

“I got it,” he said, and at first I wasn’t sure what he meant. He dropped the coat in his hand and moved in front of me. I watched him wordlessly, suddenly feeling very tired of talking anyway. 

Arthur’s eyes met my own for a moment, searching my face. Whatever he found there, he seemed satisfied with, and he moved his hands to the buttons of my jacket. He started from the top, unbuttoning each at an impossibly slow pace, or at least it felt like it.

He smoothed his hands up to my shoulders, and gently pushed off each sleeve, taking out my arms. I shivered again, my skin now freshly exposed to the cold. I spied the slightest twitch of his lips. He reached around me, his body hovering slightly above mine, his neck an inch from my lips. I felt myself lean forward, my nose brushing up against him. His hands pulled the rest of my coat off from behind me, and he sat back, bunching it into a ball. He then took his dry coat and pulled it over me in its place, rubbing his hands slightly up and down my arms. “There,” he said, and rested back on his heels again. 

I blinked up at him, my lips slightly parted. His face softened, his lips pulling down into a teasing smile. He reached out and cupped my cheek, and I leaned into it almost immediately, not caring enough to be embarrassed by it. So big and warm. “Lookit you…” he cooed, his thumb stroking my skin. “Feelin’ that drink already?”

I hummed noncommittally, too focused on the newfound warmth from his jacket around me and his hand on my cheek. 

Arthur huffed a quiet laugh, “Guess that’s a yes.”

He stood, dropping his hand from my cheek, and my head dropped slightly. I sighed, snuggling into his jacket to make up for it. It wasn’t the same. 

“‘M still cold.” I complained.

“Yer insatiable.” He said, but knelt back down again nonetheless. I raised my head to meet his gaze. He thinned his lips. “Don’t think I’ve ever had such a whiny bounty.”

“Sorry, Arthur.” I mumbled, looking over at his tent longingly. It wasn’t my barn, but it would give at least some protection from this wind, as opposed to sleeping out here. 

Before I could ask about it, air whooshed beneath me, and I yelped in surprise. Arthur had hoisted me up into his arms, and began to carry me to his tent. My eyes widened slightly. “A..Arthur?” I whispered, subconsciously snuggling into his chest. He was so strong, it was like I weighed nothing to him.

“You’ll just whine all night if I don’t let you stay in here.” He explained, ducking past the flaps to drop me down on the bedroll. He was probably right about that. Or maybe this was just another way of making sure I didn’t escape while he slept.

I rolled under the cover, snuggling into it as far as I could. I inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent of him, so much stronger here than on his jacket. My eyelids fluttered closed. 

I felt him sigh and enter the bedroll next to me. It was a tight fit, Arthur pressed against my back to keep any amount of cover atop him. His hand rested on my hip, heavy and possessive. “Warmer?” He whispered, his breath tickling my ear. He was so close.

“Mm-hm,” I hummed, my voice barely coming out. 

I thought that was it, but then…

His voice dropped lower, quieter. “…You sure?” 

A shiver ran through me. What? His hand squeezed my hip lightly, pulling me closer into him. His breath ghosted past my ear, against my neck. Was he…?

I exhaled shakily, some deep part of my whiskey-addled brain telling me that this was my chance. That if there was anything that would convince this man to let me go…

Lightly, I pressed back into him, sighing when I felt his hand smooth to the top of my thigh. “Could use a bit more,” I murmured.

It was all the prompting Arthur needed. Hot lips pressed against my neck, his hand insistent on molding my ass against the hard line in his pants. My breath hitched in surprise, and I felt myself rock back against him before I could think. He cursed under his breath, dragging his hand forward and between my thighs. I attempted to part my legs, allow him better access, but was met with resistance. 

Oh, right. The rope. 

He laughed behind me, smoothing his hand back to grab my ass instead. I squeaked in surprise, feeling him push me onto my stomach. “Don’t think you’re gettin’ out of those anytime soon,” he promised. I flushed at that.

Arthur yanked me back, forcing my ass into the air. I felt his hands palm me, smoothing circles into my pants. “Looks even better like this,” he muttered, and I couldn’t tell if he was talking to me or himself. 

Before I could respond, he reached around and unclasped my pants (much faster than my jacket), pulling down at the sides just enough. The rope bound me mid-thigh, so he could only get my pants down so far. A cool breeze blew past the tent, and I felt a bit of it ghost against me. My face reddened, feeling all at once how wet I was. Really? I felt surprised at myself.

I squirmed, rubbing my thighs together. “Arthur, are-“

A slap to my ass silenced me. I squeaked and jolted forward, the heat in my face increasing tenfold. “Dealt with enough of yer whinin’ for one night.” He bit, soothing his hand over where he slapped. 

I exhaled, burying my face deeper into the bedroll, feeling my hips sway against his hand, begging for more. 

His hands smoothed down my ass, reaching down to squeeze my thighs apart, to better see me, see how wet I already was for him. I hoped he couldn’t see. It was bad enough to have him feel- 

“A-Ah…” my breath hitched, feeling his thumb drag down through my folds. 

He hissed, sliding the pad of his thumb against my clit. “Shit, sweetheart, you’re soakin’,” 

I squirmed against his touch, trying not to moan, unsure if I’d be punished again for it. He pushed his thumb back up, pressing it inside of me, and I felt myself try to part my legs again, to feel more of him, deeper, and almost cried in frustration when I couldn’t. 

I heard him chuckle again behind me. “Aww, I’ll take care of you, darlin’, don’ worry,” he said, moving his thumb out to trace back down to my clit, pushing another finger inside of me in its stead. I muffled my moan into the pillow. 

Arthur continued working at me, circling my clit with those deft, rough fingers of his, slowly pushing in and out of me. I pushed back against him, desperately trying to feel more, but every time he just shoved me right back where I was before, keeping up his torturous pace.

All at once, he pulled away, and I whined. Another slap to my ass as a result, and I let out a muffled groan, feeling my eyes roll back. “What’d I say about whinin’?” He admonished.

I wiggled my hips back, hearing him undo his own pants. Please, please, please. He was all I could think about, my legs desperately trying to separate, to take in more, more, more. 

I almost wept when I felt him nudge against me, coating himself in the wetness he’d created. I pushed back, trying to take him in, knowing if I angled it right he wouldn’t even need to help me. His hand kept my ass steady, soothing circles onto it. “So needy…” he mocked, smoothing his hand down to my hips, to my waist, squeezing there. 

Slowly, god, so slowly, he pushed into me, forcing me open around him. I moaned obscenely, unable to keep it back anymore. He didn’t seem to care this time, letting out a low curse of his own under his breath. Almost there, almost there… and he thrust into me, making me gasp at the sudden movement. 

He pulled back and rammed back in, setting a bruising pace. I pushed back into him with each thrust, the ropes cutting into my thighs with how I fought against them, trying to take in as much of him as possible each time. 

His hands gripped the tops of my thighs and part of my ass like a handle, using me like some kind of toy. “God-damn,” his voice came out staccato, matching his movements, “you’re so fuckin’.. tight.. for me…”

I whimpered, arching back, so lost in pleasure that I truly didn’t care what he did to me. He could have whatever he wanted, as far as I was concerned. 

Drool dribbled out of my mouth, wetting his pillow. I felt limp under him, only kept upright by those rough hands of his.

“Fuck,” he muttered, his movements becoming less regular, more frantic. He swore again before pulling out of me, spending onto my ass and back. 

We stayed like that for a moment or two, catching our breath, before he swiped off my back with something and collapsed next to me. 

I flopped onto my side to face him, my legs still bound together. “Thank you, Arthur,” I whispered, “I’m much warmer now.”

Arthur snorted, snaking his arm around me to pull me to his chest. “My pleasure.”

-

The next morning I awoke alone in his tent, hearing him shuffle around outside. I blinked blearily, reaching up to rub the crust from my eyes. I yawned, laying onto my back, stretching my legs apart.

Wait. Stretching my legs apart?

I glanced down to visually confirm the sensation, finding my legs freed from the rope. I also noticed my pants had been pulled back up to cover me.

I sat up, peeking through the tent flaps. He sat at the fire, his back to me. Was he just letting me sleep comfortably before we left?

Despite the threat of death hanging over my head, I felt myself warm at the thought. This was a much sweeter awakening than I had expected.

Before I could think about escaping, or at least putting off our trip to the hangman, Arthur turned, as if sensing I was awake. "Mornin'," he greeted, his voice soft and low. I shrank a little under his gaze, and whispered a greeting back before creeping out from the tent. 

Once outside, I shivered, pulling his jacket tighter around me. Arthur grunted, beckoning to me. "C'mere,"

I obeyed, walking over to where he sat. He spread his legs, patting the ground between them. I blinked down at him blankly. 

He rolled his eyes and snatched at my hand, pulling me to the ground. I made a small noise of surprise, falling to sit between his legs. His arms and knees caged me in, bringing me back into his chest. This was so strange. 

But not unwelcome.

I snuggled back into him anyway, not about to turn my nose up at the last physical affection I'd ever receive. 

We stared into the fire for who knows how long. I almost didn't breathe, trying not to remind him that we had places to be. 

Arthur squeezed me lightly, propping his chin on my shoulder. "Y'can relax," he sighed, his accent thicker now, in the morning. "'M not bringin' y'in." 

What? My breath hitched, my heart beating faster. Was he serious? I turned in his hold slowly, craning my neck to look back at him. I didn't trust myself to speak.

He met my gaze, his expression unreadable. 

"...Thank you," I said dumbly, breaking eye contact. Well, now what? 

Now, I certainly didn't want him to change his mind.

I turned a bit more in his hold to better face him, feeling his arms adjust around me. I smoothed my hands up his shirt and met his eyes again. He watched me carefully, suspiciously, like he was expecting some kind of attack. 

I moved slowly, not wanting to startle him, inching my face closer to his. I watched his eyes drop to my lips, his own parting in anticipation. I hadn't noticed before, but I seemed to have some sway over this bounty hunter, readily accepting whatever touch I offered him. 

I smiled softly at that, and closed the gap between us, gently pressing my lips to his. Warm. 

He melted the slightest amount, his shoulders sagging, his chest leaning closer to me. He was sweeter, now, in the morning. Softer, more patient. I slipped my hands up behind his neck, scratching lightly at the hair poking out from beneath his hat. He sighed into my mouth, his arms squeezing me closer to him. 

I wasn't sure how long we stayed like that, warm and close. When we broke apart, he cleared his throat, looking past me to not meet my eyes. "You..." his voice scratched out and he cleared his throat again, "Y'can stay with me, if you want. 'Till this whole thing blows over."

I had a sneaking suspicion it would be a long time yet. I nuzzled my nose against his jaw. Staying with him was safer than anything I would try on my own. "Thank you, Arthur."

He hummed. 

a/n: on a scale of 1-10 how terrible is it that i posted this from class NOT WROTE IN CLASS posted from

anyway teehee hope you enjoyed and also hope it wasnt obvious that i kinda had no idea where to go with this teehee im just a girl

(also posted on ao3 under same user)

[artdcnaldson]

hnnnnghnbhbbn repressed art is so yummy you always match my freak im tweaking rn!!!

also the little nods to patrick adding to his repressed-ness!!!!!! its so scrumptious

i dont know where you wanna take this but i have soooo many ideas i need him so bad

i just keep thinking about her finding loopholes to convince art to give in…

rn now in my mind i have smth smth about her being just so horny and wanting to play, so maybe going to wherever he is and telling him she needs a toy… like asking him for his hand and using it to touch herself and his hand just gets soooo soaked and wet and he really doesn’t wanna move it cause thats immoral, hes just helping out, but maybe hell crook his fingers inside and just watch how she goes crazyyyyyy… maybe he’ll make her squirt… yeah…

ily btw you get me!!!

- 🐚

I’m sorry this took so long that’s my bad baby </3 I read this came passed out died was brought back to life etc. please forgive me 💔

But hngnngngng I imagine he’s so willing and needy after you let him rut against ur thighs and get off :(( all clingy bc he’s like wait maybe she’s the one 🥺

Which is…… but anyways!!

But yeah god he’s just. A living breathing wet dream. He comes in from the courts all sweaty and flushed and smiley, chugging Gatorade or water or whatever. And it just fucking sets you off. You’ve spent weeks soaked and needy with no release outside of your hand. You just need something.

So you ask where Pat is (heading to the country club to swim) and how long he’s going to be gone (three hours max, but no less than one). So you drag him into your room, lock the door.

“Can I use your fingers, baby? You don’t have to move them, just let me play with them. They’re so pretty, I want to feel them. Please?”

And he blushes, looks nervous, but notes. “O-okay. Just tell me what to do.”

He’s so willing, so sweet. He swallows hard when you guide his hand between his thighs, when he feels how warm and wet you are. The first pussy he’s ever touched 🥺 and he gets hard so fast.

But he has to remind himself it’s not for him! He’s trying to help! Like you help. And it’s not wrong as long as he’s not really moving his hand, just like it’s okay if he humps you because it’s just him moving not you <3 so he ignores how hard he is, just lets you guide his hand because he’s just your sweet little toy <3

He thinks it’s interesting, the way you fold down some of his fingers, posing him like a doll. He lets out a choked sort of whine as you press his fingertips to your entrance. You’re so warm and wet inside, tight around his fingers, squeezing him.

He’s flushed the prettiest pink, moaning pathetically as you use his fingers. And his brain is so fuzzy, filled only with the feeling of you hot around his fingers, dripping wet and sticky down his palm.

“Can you—“ you gesture with the hand that’s not circling your clit, curving your fingers.

He shouldn’t. But he’s already got his fingers in your pussy and he’s probably already going to hell anyway. He crooks his fingers so they press against the front wall. Your eyes roll back, you make the prettiest, most desperate sound.

He smiles so proudly as you start grinding down against his fingers, all desperate and needy. Feels your cunt clamping down around him, feels the rush of wetness and release as you finish.

And you look so pretty, chest heaving as you try to catch your breath, mouth ajar as soft moans spill out. You pull his fingers out of your sensitive cunt and Art actually fucking whines at the sight of his fingers glistening and sticky with your juices.

“You can taste,” you encourage with a coy smile. “You’ll like it, I think.”

He moans when he pushes those fingers between his lips, tasting the tang of your arousal. It’s not enough— he laves his tongue over his fingertips and knuckles, trying to swallow down every hint of you.

And you’re laid out before him, legs spread, glistening pussy just fucking teasing him. He wants to just taste you— to bury his face between your thighs, lap at your drenched folds, make you cum again. All him this time, none of your guidance.

But he can’t, the poor thing.

[aihaitahm]

Hellooo!!! This idea has been stuck in my mind for the past week. But what would be your headcannons for maybe the Honkai star rail characters: (Kafka, Gepard, Jing Yuan and maybe Welt) dating the reader who’s an Aeon! Or Is a godlike being like the aeons!

hsr characters with aeon! gn! reader

a/n: im really busy !!! sorry also i didnt make reader a “specific” aeon aka theyre “aeon of ___” for ur imagination!

characters: kafka, jing yuan, gepard, welt

kafka

the type to always brag about you. literally praises you and would not shut up about her aeon significant other and everyone gets annoyed. dont get me wrong, you are more than your godhood/aeon-hood. she loves you for who you are and thinks she is very lucky to have you. could name every good quality about you.

can be a bit possessive when she sees someone flirts with you. would literally cling on you and kiss you on your cheek. she chuckles at your flustered expression because shes always so clingy yet you never fail to blush and get shy. how can someone as powerful as you be putty in her hands? though she does get a bit playful and flustered when you scold her jokingly while using your authoritative voice. (she finds it so hot)

thw type to be your number 1 defender. would literally outsmart every debate everytime it was something bad about you. she loves you a lot and if some comments or rumors bother you, she would take care of it just for you and would treat you to make you feel better.

her pet names would be mostly “dear, babe, love” or if shes trying to catch your attention something like “my pookie wookie god/goddess~” literally anything super cliche and something to tease you.

gepard

would be a bit clueless about your identity when you introduce yourself to him for the first time. or if he did know you, he would be shock to why an aeon, an attractive one is talking to him. he is just a mere captain afterall. would be the most respectful when speaking to you even though you said its okay to be casual.

in a relationship, talking and cuddling with him makes him so shy and red. please dont tease him… he will explode. though seriously speaking, he likes the aura or energy you give. he feels at peace and would always wanna be in your touch.

asks about your aeon-hood a lot due to his curiosity. loves listening to you talk about it and he loves your voice. he would to talk about yoh to serval a lot and his big sister just smiles and would occasionally fake cry/sniffle knowing her brother is growing up.

he may get a bit insecure sometimes when he thinks about the fact you are a very respectable aeon while he is just a human captain. you reassure him that you love him for being gepard and him being captain of the silvermane guards is already enough responsibility.

jing yuan

is very curious about your nature. during his first encounter with you, he immediately felt magnified by your appearance and presence. he talks to you in a very respectable, calm manner but inside he is freaking out. would play it cool because he is a confident general.

fast forward! he has a bad habit of staring at you fof too long. heart eyes everytime. he loves everything about you and the fact you are an aeon makes him even more in love. loves it when you nap with him and it makes him feel more connected to you.

would spoil you with gifts, with affections, with everything… he claims he is just making his offering to his favorite aeon (you). loves mediumish pda with you and always holds your hand, if not your waist.

if jing yuan loves you, so does mimi and yanqing. you all become family to his eyes and he loves how absolutely down-to-earth you are, how you treat everyone equally regardless of status. you all would find time during the week and eat together and talk about anything.

welt

at first, he knows who you are and is quite nonchalant to you. he is the type to question your intentions with him since you were being friendly towards him. he tries to not think about you but he finds it really hard not to. doesnt know what to draw? maybe he should draw you. how though? what. why is he thinking of you?

when he gets into a relationship with you, he would paint you a museum of you and occassionally drawings of you both. he is more softer with you and quite affectionate but he still has to get used to physical affection sometimes.

enjoys deep talks with you. he is truly impressed and admires with all the knowledge and wisdom you hold. loves going into deep subjects and you challenging him his views sometimes. may talk to you about the stuff he read on facebook (hes an old grandpa after all LOL) and asks what you think about it.

dislikes getting teased by the astral express crew but he appreciates the support from everyone. would sometimes ask them what to give you whenever its a special occassion but always ends up making a portrait or drawing of you.

[tsuki--sora]

helloo i was wondering if u have any tips on how to start learning how to draw?? i’m gonna try it for the nth time and force myself to not give up and since i absolutely LOVE ur art i was hoping you could help me?? thank you in advance and have a happy new year 🥰

omggg i just saw this :O!! i havent been around here so i didnt see :C but anyway!!! im not sure what advice or tips to give tbh so ill just share some things that helped me 🙇

knowing what im drawing (basically...using reference lol ) u might've seen this tip a lot but its true 😆 think of it as like... training wheels on a bike AHSAHSAHHA u use training wheels for some time until u can be good enough to ride a bike without them or something like that.... its the same with using reference. u have to know and get familiar with what an object looks like first before you're able to draw without it and with confidence. tbh i dont always do this bcos sometimes i just wanna mindlessly draw ykno 😔 and thats okay as well!!! just remember that reference is very helpful when u hit a dead end with ur artwork :D also learn from real life!! look around u! sometimes id stare at something and nod in understanding. ----------------------------------

draw what u love <33 honestly, i only got back into drawing when i went down the vtuber hole a few years ago LMAO i would draw vox akuma eveyday 🙂‍↕️ and then my love for one piece got revived so now i draw my favorite characters every chance i can get bcos its all i can think abt!!! its honestly a good motivator. ----------------------------------

accepting and learning from mistakes ive always struggled with perfectionism and that really took my enjoyment and love for creating🥹 and that also stopped me from experimenting and exploring coz id always think that it wont come out as i hoped it would. SOOOO for the past 2-3 years i think?? i make it a habit to STOP ✋ being super critical when i see or make a mistake. the perspective is wrong? noted. the anatomy looks wonky? okay!! i let them exist in my artworks bcos how would i even know where to improve in if i dont know what it is 😅 i also make sure to keep those errors in mind so i know what areas i should be working on. u can always correct them on ur next work!! and the next!! again and again!!! its never-ending! ure always improving, always learning. ---------------------------------

i also have a board of artworks and styles that i really really like and i look at them when i need inspiration hahaha sometimes u just have to scroll thru pinterest for hours and draw nothing lol

personally, i think one doesnt have to draw everyday to be good. i mean, you can if u want to! but u might burn out fast if u force urself to draw everyday. just.. pace yourself. remember to rest and be good to yourself as well :))

thats all i can think of right now. i feel like i could share more but im just not good with words or explaining things. forgive me 😔🙇 our experiences may differ and what helped me may not be of use to u,,, but i hope this can help u even juuuuust a bit :"D be proud of every piece u make. u worked hard on it after all <33

(also sharing my art throughout the years!)

[romanarose]

HAPPY 2K LOVELY YOU DESERVE IT AND SOOO MUCH MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOOO!!!!!!1

anyway

UMMM you know me and you know i would BEG for any TWW crumbs...

pls....pls im so hungry its lonely out here without them please.......

MY BELOVED CLEM!!!

The Wrong Way (Joel Miller X reader)

Takes place around chapter 8, during her pregnancy but before brotherhood bonus chapter (which if you havn't read, it really adds to joel and tommys relationship.)

Sick Day

The moment you woke up, before you even opened your eyes, you knew something was wrong.

You woke up from a nightmare, but that was nothing new. Last nights was... hard. That's for sure. Things had been going so well, the little bump on your stomach swelling so slightly, evidence that you hadn't fucked this up...

You dreamed you miscarried, and Joel was mad at you again. You dreamed you were back in the old room, with your mattress on the floor and the boarded up window, suffering the things you endured before.

You dreamed Joel strung up Zach and skinned him like Nick. You could still smell the blood. Thinking maybe the horror you dreamed of was messing with your stomach, you ignore it. There was too much to be done. Jack had constructed a washboard for you, and you wanted to scrub down all the clothes that hadn't gotten a proper wash in years. You washed them, of course, but this was even better. Also, you actually had enough to make no bake cookies! Lorenzo's birthday was tomorrow, and it's been too hot to bake, so this was perfect. And as always, there was your garden to tend to, your chickens, not to mention cleaning up after the 8 different men living in the house. They were not clean. Except Jack.

Still... there was no harm in laying her for a bit, at least until Joel woke up. Maybe he'd eat you out this morning if you asked nicely... he was quite indulgent with you since the pregnancy.

"Morn'n, little one" He mumbles in your ear, and you smile. Sun was shining in, making for your favorite part of the day. Spending quiet time with Joel. Mornings were just for you and him. Making love was sweet if you did it, conversation was light, if at all. You liked talking to Joel, a lot actually, but something about his quiet strength, his protective arm around you and hand on your stomach, the gentle kisses in your hair...

When it was time to get up, Joel would sit you on the bed naked and look through to closet at the mass of dresses he'd acquired for you. He'd start with your underwear, then socks, knealing at the bed to put them on, then your shoes. Then, he'd stand up up and put on a bra. Finally, Joel would slide the dress over your head, and the smile he gave you when your head popped out always stated your day off right.

The hair. Joel liked to sit you between his legs on the bed, comb through your hair and hum. You liked when he hummed. Most of the time he kept your hair down but sometimes he put a ribbon in. You'd put your handkerchief in your hair when he was out, it was more practical.

You would spend all day waiting for him to get home again.

Joel rocked his hips into you, feeling his bulge up against your ass. He was in his boxers, and although you'd gone to bed in a shirt and a pair of his boxers, you'd pulled them off in the middle of the night when it got hot. Sure, you could've pulled Joel's arm off you too... but you didn't want that.

Now, you realized how hot it had gotten in the room.

"Gonna be warm today" You mumble to him, kissing a vein on his arm. "Dont be out too long. Don't want you getting heat stroke."

There was a pause before he spoke. "Aren't you cold?"

"Hm?" You shift, turning to look at him where he's frowning. "No, it's so hot-" You stop when he presses a hand to your forehead, then jolts up.

"Christ little one, you're burning up."

The way he exits the bed so fast hurt you.

"Joel, Im fine-" You try to insist, standing up to try and stop him while you wrapped the blanket around you body. Not like everyone here except Lorenzo hasn't seen you naked, and you aren't exactly Lorenzo's type. Still, when you stand, a wave of dizziness washed over you and you stumble, eyes crossing as the world unfocuses.

"Shit!" Joel dives to catch you, stopping your pregnant body from falling into a side table. He's gentle as he picks you up and placed you onto the bed, but once again goes to leave. You feel alone.

*

Joel rushes to the kitchen, trying to find a rag. Shit, what did you do with the rags? Everything in here was rearranged.

The slamming of draws and cabininates must've woken Lorenzo.

"What the hell is your fucking problem." Jesus christ, his Boston accent was OUT when he just wakes up.

Joel slammed the cabinet next to the oven. "A rag! Jesus christ, it shouldn't be-" When he turned, Joel saw Lorenzo stand butt naked, rubbing his eyes. "PUT YOUR GODDAMN CLOTHES ON!" He bellows, but Lorenzo is unphased, brushing past Joel with bare hips to grab a rag from the drawer next to the sink.

"She likes them here because she hates her hands feeling wet."

Avoiding looking at his cock just... hanging there, Lorenzo equally avoids looking at Joel's boner.

"I'm not even gonna ask what that's for, you sickos" and begins to walk away, but Joel snaps at him.

"She's sick, asshole. Running a fever. We got any medicine?" He wets the rag.

Lorenzo's face shifts into concern. Joel knew you two had grown close over the course of the months he replaced Tommy. It was inevitable, you were precious, funny as all hell and a way at worming your way into peoples hearts. He couldn't understand how your dad had hurt such a sweet little thing so bad and for so long.

"For fucks sake Lorenzo go find some medicine!"

"Jesus!" He throws his hands in the air, walking back to his room. "Let me put some clothes on first!"

Joel shook his head, heading toward you again. "Sleeping naked while you have a roommate is fucking weird, hermano."

"I don't hear Jack complaining."

When Joel opened the door, he saw your eyes flash open. You'd been crying. He drops to his knees at your bedside, feeling you forehead again. "What's wrong, darl'n? Something hurting you?"

"I thought you left..." You sob. "I thought.... I thought you left me..."

His heart breaks at the idea you were crying over him. "No, no baby I left to get- here." He places the cool compress on your forehead and hears you breath a sigh of releif.

"Why would I leave you?"

"I figured... I figured you didn't wanna catch what I have."

He sighed, settling in at your side. "Baby girl... you nursed me all day long when I had explosive diahriah and vomiting from food sickness..." Joel says with a smile, laying his head on the bed. "I can stay by your side when you're sick."

You shake your head. "There's so much to do! The chickens, the garden, your work- Joel I gotta-"

"Shhhhh, little one, shhhh. My work can wait, and Lorenzo will know what to do with the chickens and garden, yeah?"

"Yeah." You sniffle. "But he's scared of chickens, remember?"

Joel can't help but laugh at that. "Yeah, but I think he can feed them, and Aziz can get the eggs, okay? Darl'n..." He placed his hand on your stomach. "We gotta take care of the baby, okay? Just rest. I'll take care of both of you."

A knock on the door.

Joel made sure your were covered under the blanket before beckoning Lorenzo in.

"This is all I got, boss. Maybe next time we focus a little less on getting another fuck'n onsie and maybe get some damn medcine."

"Shut the hell up." Joel turns to you. "What are you symtoms. Be honest."

It was nausea, fever, head ache, body aches, and you had a sore throat. A flu, probably... Lorezno had found thermometer, but Joel made him stick it in boiling water before using it on you. Only dirty thing going in your mouth was his cock after a long day.

100.3

Normally, nothing crazy for an adult but for a pregnant woman?

All they had for medicine was some old pepto and a couple cough drops Joel used during the day, but nothing helped the fever. He laid with you as you went through flashes, holding you close during the chills and wiping your face off during the hot, always by your side, always right there when you needed to throw up. Joel's arms were your steady grasp.

After vomiting up the rice he tried to give you for lunch int he toilet, Joel scooped you up again from the bathroom floor after gently cleaning your face. There hadn't been time when taking you from the bed to grab the blanket, so walking back Joel just carried you naked back to bed. He carried you like he always did, like a child under his care, your arm wrapped around him and face tucked into his neck... He wrapped his hands under your butt to cover you.

When you were back on the bed, sleeping before you head hit the pillow, he checked your tempature again. 102.3.

"I'll be right back, beautiful girl. Hold on tight for me, please? I need you both... I need you to be okay."

*

It was late when the fever broke, it was already growing dark and you had the faint taste of cherry in your mouth. Strange. The room was empty and dark and scary without him, and you hadn't remembered a thing from the last few hours.

"Joel?" No answer. "JOEL?"

Joel rushed in, glass of water quickly set ont he side table as he wet to hold you at your stomach. "What's wrong? Are you hurting? Is the baby okay?"

You nod, quickly. "I just... I didn't know where you were. I was scared."

He breathes a sigh of relief. "Just went to get you water... I see you're finally awake." Joel's calloused hands brush a lock of hair out of your face, sticky with dried sweat.

"I smell really bad." Joel huffs a laugh. "It's okay, we'll take a bath tonight. That sounds good?"

You smile "Yeah, sounds nice... I feel a lot better."

"I'm glad, little one. Ain't every gonna let noth'n happen t'yuh"

*

Watching the water boil on the stove as the cold water poured into the tub, Jack comes inside from helping Aziz gather eggs.

"Hey, thanks for riding out so far. You made it in record time, I think." Joel was sencier.

Jack gave a quick nod. He was a man of few words.

"Hey, uh, don't- and tell Lorenzo this too, don't tell her where the medicine came from. Just... we found it here, alright? She don't need tah be think'n 'bout him again."

Jack gave another nod, and almost went to bed... then he turned around. "You ain't gonna kill me for talk'n to him still, are yuh?"

Joel shook his head, turning off the stove. "Long as you don't go betray'n me or nothing like that. I'd havta kill yuh then, but... nah, not for this."

Jack was Joel's only connect to Jackson, to Tommy... and it came in handy today. He doubted his little wife and baby would have survived the fever without the medicine.

**************

Im literally so behind on my asks this was from my 2000 follower celebration MONTHS AGO

dont fucking look at me lmfao

if this all interests you, check out the wrong way BUT BEWARE WARNINGS!!!!

thanks for everyone who read!!!!

follow @romana-updates and click follow to keep up!

tagging a few who might be interested

@my-secret-shame (for lorenzo) @miraclesabound @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @milla-frenchy @pimosworld @lunar-ghoulie @gogh-with-the-flow @justagalwhowrites @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

[ma3mae]

Don't be so annoyed, love!

Summary: He's so annoying sometimes but it's ok because you love him 😭 (HC w/ Dazai, Kunikida, Ranpo)

Genre: Crack, fluff, lowkey suggestive themes

Warnings: 🗿 we ignoring the red flags bc we can. also mentions of farting bc dazai 🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿

A/N: u cant tell me that they wouldnt do any of these things ok 💀also kunikida's got a small drabble out of nowhere but im always wildin when it comes to him 😭😭😭😭😭

Dazai Osamu

u cant tell me that as soon as hes rly comfortable in ur relationship that he WOULD NOT be ashamed of just farting outta nowhere honestly 💀

Like yall r just chilling on the couch, watching smth and he just lets it all out bc why should he hold himself back 🗿

Hes at home 🗿

But bro's lucky he doesnt smell but 🗿🗿🗿🗿 wheres the warning from him

u give him the side eye and hes like "What? Are you perhaps ashamed of human nature, bella?" like ok we'll leave him alone but he ruined the emotional moment of the movie yall were watching 😭😭😭

Is also the type to prob leave his socks and clothes lying around

It got better over time but he still sometimes does it bc old habits die hard i guess 🧍

once got so bad you just collected all of his clothes and put them infront of the door so he'd have no choice but to pick all of that up and do it himself 💀

would try to talk his way out of it in the beginning but also felt kinda bad after the relationship got more and more serious

So now hes a good bf/ husband and does it himself 🤩 (with the occasional sock under the couch 💀)

drinking habits would take a bit longer to be fully gone, he'd learn to regulate it over time

He's learned to warn you tho when he thinks that a rly shitty day might hit him bc work and more

sometimes you take the day off and do something together to take his mind off of it

Sometimes you're at work and a "im home" text without hearts will come and you know whats wrong

would feel more comfortable over time letting you take care of him

will definitely show you his appreciation for you the next days in one way or the other 🤩💅

talking about living together, yall would often have to sit down to talk about his spendings bc our man cant save for ANYTHING

Used to often come home with little things like "Look, this reminded me of you!" and it's a plushie of a cat or something

Started off cute and small but got dramatic like him really fast

ngl he came home with a expensive necklace u liked when the both of u went shopping but u didnt buy it bc.. she expensive...

like he was charming as always with his "Tada! Guess what I've got you?~ 😋" ".... Not the necklace...? 😧" "🤩 How did you guess that right, bella??" "😨😨"

THIS man right here wouldnt even hesitate to just right out fking steal shit for you if u want it bc thats how much Power u got over him he'd never admit that tho sksks... OK maybe in bed...

he'd def either blackmail or bribe chuuya into helping him with stealing

probably even has access to his bank account and you'd only realize that when he'd stand infront of your door, asking where that "f*cking b*stard" is

you'd legit have to mediate their convo or else the whole building you live in would be gone immediately skks 💀

Chuuya likes u so he wouldnt make yall pay for it bc he knows that dazai's nearly broke 24/7 and u dont deserve to pay for his fault 💅

it would be enough to destroy his pride to make him obey chuuya for like 2 weeks or sum cue evil cackling from said red head

queen of Gaslightining nr. 1 😭 sometimes its for the dumbest arguments tho like why its okay to smack your lips while eating 😭

"I don't know it's just really noisy and kinda annoying for me?" "But Bella, that shows just how tasty your food is or are going to deny that fact and say that I should not show my appreciation for it? What if for me personally it's a sign of a good meal?" "Yeah but doesnt need to be that for me. Also you can show your appreciation for it in other ways like just simply saying its delicious?"

"But actions speak louder than words, my love." "YEAH, well then what do you want then???"

Its just a whole shit show and would (lmao it WILL) end in him giving you just shameless bedroom eyes and well you know whats gonna be after dinner lmaooo 🤡😭

Also also i do believe that hes not the best cook at first but hes a real fast learner so it prob would only take him a week of consuming cooking videos and reading books and BOOM

"Samu, is this a 3 course meal you're cooking because that's a LOT of ingredients in the kitchen." "Sssh just sit down, wash yourself up and enjoy the evening, my love! I'll call you when I'm done 💕"

Manages to somehow still give you some snacks and drinks in between the cooking 😭 with some sneaked in kisses on your shoulder or lips 😏

If you go and hug him from behind, he'll be MELTING

Like nuzzling your face into his back while wrapping your arms around his torso, you feel the slight rumble in his chest as he chuckles at your cute action 😭

"If you want to eat something then you should take a break from being so cute, you know? Don't want the food to go bad from maybe getting a bit distracted if you stay here for a bit longer." "Ew, are you implying you'd start something infront of our food??"

"... Well, I can just have a whole meal by myself but you'd be left hungry so it's your choice 😋"

🗿 the way he doesnt need long to be turned on is alwaya amazing to u but thats just how whipped he is and bro is a whole snack himself so WHOS complaining 😋💅

food's is guaranteed to taste heavenly but if he knows youve got time, then he'd make excuses to taste your cooking like

"Samu, it's been a while since I've gotten to taste your cooking." "Aww, was it that delicious for you? Hmm but I actually prefer your cooking!"

Time for some cooking and baking lessons together, eoow 💅 with the occasional make out session because the sauce found it's way on your lips and he just had to clean it up with his 😭😋

honestly despite all of some of the difficulties, dazai would never fail in making you feel loved in his own way even tho u gotta peel back some layers 🗿

At the end of the day, his bear hugs and many kisses are smth u love to come back home to after work

also doesnt say it but would def be a house husband for u 🤩 with the occasional "whoops gotta go and do smth quick" text and he comes home at like midnight skks bc the agency needs his cute ass 😋 but dw dinner's ready and house chores have been done so enjoy ur evening after work, zurlie 💅

dont kill me for this but id give him a 7.5/10 😭

Obsessed with him and i love him but it would prob be really really exhausting to get him to FULLY trust you and its honestly understandable

Also he kinda makes me feel like i'd have to walk on eggshells around him because you often dont really know what hes thinking 😭😭

could smile at u while thinking "why u so ugly" 😭😭

also bro is so smooth, its scary like he'd prob make us forget immediately that hes trying to find out everything about us(why he sounding like a stalker 😨😨 wouldnt want him to be MY stalker 😨😨 or would I?? 🤩) MY DELULU BRAIN 👹

Doppo Kunikida

😨 Cleaning maniac

personification of the verse "I can COOk, i can CLEAN" (i know its "dont" instead of can but we all know hes like perfect house husband material... maybe a bit too perfect 💀💀💀👹)

If u forgot a cup on the dinner table, he'd legit take the cup, put it in ur hand and be like "why did u leave it there if u r not using it"

WILL def rant about why u shouldnt do it

Honestly huge nagging mom vibes 💀💀

At the beginning of moving in together, he'd just clean everything without a word whatsoever

Like you wanna help around the house too? NUH UH, he already finished everything up.

Vaccuming the house? Done

Swiping? Lmao be sure to not arrive at home after work around that time bc u gotta stand at the door and WAIT until the floor is dried 💀😭

Dishes have been done like at 5 in the fucking morning 💀👹

Bro thankfully doesn't wash clothes that often (gotta be careful of the water bill 😭) but there r days where he legit throws his clothes nearly everyday bc the worse the mission the more blood yk 🗿🗿

U had to legit drag his ass to the couch to talk to him bc he gonn be deep clean the house if someone doesnt stop him

"Kuni, you literally don't need to do EVERYTHING by yourself! I'm also here to help and frankly, it feels like you're my maid sometimes 😞" " Don't worry. Everything fits perfectly in my time plan and since you sometimes work overtime, it's better if I do a bit more of it."

... "🗿 You are legit saving this city from being destroyed so often and I just sit in the office, bro 🤡" "I understand your argument but I have seen the way you look tired so often so let me take a bit of your burden"

He knows how to make us go "🥺"

The argument prob went on for an hour until yall settled on making a plan on who does what on which days and if someone's gotta work overtime or sum then the other takes a bit of it over and so on

So in the end its alrighty 🎉

Groceries and so on are never a problem except it sometiems turns out like going shopping with your mom because...

"Omg Kuni, look!!" *holds up cute decoration* "We could put this on our dinner table! Isn't it cute 🥺??"

Bro just takes it from you and looks at the price. Legit gives you the 🤨 look

"That's 937,32 Yen (around 6€) 🤨🤨. For a tiny statue of a dog? We could find it somewhere way cheaper." "🥺 But it's a limited edition and it reminds me of you bc its got the same fur color 🥺. It's even got ur glasses on 🥺"

Bro will say no but the day after you spot the dog on the table 🤡

Yall lying in bed together and cuddle so give him a peck on the lips while killing him with your cute ass smile (U MURDERER 🗿🗿)

"What was that for?" "Hmmm, well I just noticed that said statue magically appeared on our table. You think it was a cute long haired fairy with glasses and a grumpy look 😋? "

He tries really hard to deadpan at you but the corner of his lips still tug upwards as he pinches your nose

"Well, sometimes its not so bad to buy a little extra, I guess."

If theres a market nearby with some really good deals then you'd either be dragged together with him or he'd come home after work with tons of bags

Always surprises you in how good he is at negotiating about the price

Sometimes you gotta stop him from arguing with some of the shop keepers because some decided to sell some items way too overpriced 🗿🗿🗿

you once found him stay up all night researching about reasonable prices for veggies... 😨

and cue to yall standing in the morning infront of said shop keeper getting absolutely destroyed in an argument by your man.. 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

Well guess who even got some extra free stufd because kuni terrified the shit out of him 😋

"Thank you for your hard work in harvesting and selling us these delicious vegetables. My wife is quite a fan of them." Your husband said as he put the money into the shop keepers shaky hands, face red in embarassement as he squeezed out a "It's nothing." between his teeth. His face paled at the words "We'll see each other next Monday. Until then have a great week." leaving your man's mouth as he gave him a friendly smile before taking your hand and going to the next stall,only for you to sheepishly wave goodbye to the shop keeper before going with your husband.

"Well, you gave him quite the scare back there." You said as you felt him squeeze your hand a bit tighter, the bustling of the array of people only increasing by minutes. "Someone had to correct his ways. It would help his sales but only if he's willing to take that advice seriously." he simply answered as he looked at the contents of the bag, counting the ingredients left to purchase.

"Well atleast we got ourselves more than we needed so we can go home and call it a day." "Who are you?" Chuckling at your surprised face out of the corner of his eyes, he continued to make his way towards the end of the market, to finally reach your car.

"I thought over your words and I do believe it would be nice to" laze around together "for once in a while. Everything in the house has already been done, so maybe we could try out that one series you've been talking about. The reviews seem to be quite positive about it."

He just lets a breathy laugh escape his lips at your squeal while you begin to rant on why its gonna be so good watching it and

UUUUGGHHGH 😭😭😭😭 GIVE ME KUNIKIDAAAAAAAGHHHHHH 😭😭😭🤡🤡👹👹👹

honestly there are like no real red flags like his red flags are disguised green flags and yall can legit work through it easily

The only thing would be his tendency to overwork himself and it could lead to an argument but never a real fight because hes pretty easy to reason with

Like even when hes stubborn, he'll STILL listen to your words because the many good things about him that he'd always make sure to take your words seriously 🗿🗿

which sometimes makes it tempting to tease him bc we can lowkey understand why dazai easily tells him the most outrageous shit and your man just casually writes it down in his notebook 😭

"That damn idiot managed to fool me again by telling me that aliens have been among us (AMOGUS 👹) and that the goverment has been hiding it from us for decades." "I thought you already knew about that tho?"

"What" "What?"

"Wait so they're real?"

Cue to him showing him a video (that dazai sent to you a week ago just for this moment 😭)

Lmao dont tease him too much tho but dw, he cant stay mad at you at all lmao 😋💅

Honestly a 8.5/10 bc his nagging scares me 💀😭

Edogawa Ranpo

"Greatest Detective" more like "Queen of Gaslightining" 👹👹

Everyone knows hes way too obsessed with sweets but how the hell is his teeth actually still existing 🗿🗿

ngl i believe fukuzawa would prob sometimes just randomly ask him if he brushed his teeth bc he lowkey lowkey raised him ok 🤡

Ranpo is all nice like "yup, i did." but when u ask him, hes a whole b*tch about it

"Hah??? Why would you ask me that?? Do you really believe that I'd be so dumb to forget about brushing my teeth? If i can solve the most difficult cases then why would you assume that brushing my teeth might something that I'd forget, huuuhh??"

His gaslightining used to work at the beginning of ur relationship but sooner or later its not hard to notice his patterns 🗿

Like yas ok, he could just put up a whole ass strategy in how to not get u to notice that he didnt brush em at all but bro

Hes too lazy

And hes a sucker for attention 😩 like he might be "annoyed" if u nag at him bc of smth but he absolutely loves it bc its just one of his many ways to get ur attention without him having to actively get up and get it for himself 🤡🤡🤡🤡

Hes a huge clown but i love him 😭

Dazai tends to forget his socks or smth lying on the floor but THIS mf right here just doesnt rly care 😭

Like that was the first thing u noticed when u entered his apartment 🤡

Its not right out messy on a disgusting degree, its more like theres tons of trinkets n shit from cases or just random candy wrap hidden under the couch 💀💀💀

The epitome of "I can do it tomorrow" bc bro doesnt forget, he just IGNORES that he has to do it 😭

might take a while to actually get him to yk do smth around the house

used to prob only sleep and shower at his apartment and thats it💀

But when hes whipped then hes whipped and hed actually try his best to help around the house

Key word "try" 🤡

Like its often tbh accompanied by "okay, ill do it but only if i get smth"

A MANCHILD, I SAY 👹👹👹👹

But there are days when he legit deep cleans everything by himself bc either you had a bad day or yall had a fight 👹👹

still would whip out the "now gimme something, please 😋" if yall cuddle after a fight and he cleaned and tidied everything up for his love 🤩

doesnt always have to be candy yk HEUEHEUEHEUUE 👹👹👹👹👹

also its not a surprise but dont let him near the kitchen

HE COULD

HE RLY COULD COOK SO WELL

Like he had only cooked for ONE time and it was like a fever dream

Bc u legit had a fever and he cooked chicken soup but uhm 🗿

he cooked it so good??? Like veggies n meat cut and cooked up nicely?

Broth kicking in real hard?

Like? "What the hell? I thought you couldn't cook??"

Bro is about to put that spoon fr away 💀

"I'm not so heartless to let you starve and I definitely wont be giving you some cheap soup either. I just looked it up on the internet and followed the instructions so you gotta get well soon because I miss your cooking 🤩🤩"

Are we flattered?? Gurl, maybe but he'd def know if we tried to make ourselves be sick to taste his cooking again

Bro only offers to help when it comes to baking 😪😮‍💨😮‍💨

His only help is licking the dough or chocolate outta the bowl or smth 😀

would sneak in many kisses tho bc he likes u and sweet stuff is just sugar overload for him and he loves it 🤩

I think one of the important factors for him in a relationship is that fukuzawa approves of you? Since he does value his opinion over his own intellect

Like bro trusted him when it came to Fukichi and other ppl 💀

fukuzawa could legit go "aliens r evil" and ranpo would be like "ok everyone, aliens are evil!!!!" 🗿🗿🗿

honesrly i dont think why there would be a reason for fukuzawa not to accept you (if there is one then time to take 100 steps back and reflect on urself 💀)

He'd prob be impressed on how u even fell in love with him bc.. its ranpo💀

petty, clingy, can be manipulative ( but never with ill intentions), would legit prank ur ass bc he can, impatient and quickly bored af

But hes attentive, kind, can be patient when it comes down to it, empathetic (depends sksks) (also thank u fukuzawa for kinda ramming that into his head 🤩), affectionate in his own way (a sucker for physical touch but would NEVER right out admit it 🗿) and so much more honestly

there arent any real red flags tbh (might come as a surprise for some ppl)

Maybe maybe he'd obviously have a bit of difficulty fully opening up and i do believe there might be times where he once or twice legit deducted what ur feelings r for him bc hes used to being careful around people and especially bc in case someonw could randomly target the agency

Or is some kinda criminal in general

But honestly when hes learned to trust you then you know youve got yourself someone loyal 💅 and i mean FR loyal

personal favorite hc and honestly prob canon since we've already seen it : he'd not be ashamed to throw hands at someone when he thinks you're being insulted or harassed

And with hands i mean exposing them to 100% until they are pissing their pants and begging him to leave them alone 🤩🤩🤩

Also also, gives me off a similar vibe to dazai with the "maybe having to walk on eggshells" around them but ranpo doesnt make you feel as watched tbh as dazai which would kinda make it easier to talk to

but bro isnt as smooth as him so whOOP 💀💀

Overall iconic and a solid 8/10 🤩🤩🤩💕💕💕

The random ratings i gave them LMAO 💀💀💀 hope u like em 🗿