#and I'm attached to Electra

[electricfied-wolf]

“How are you doing?” It’s 1:20 am and I’m obsessing over a musical about trains! What about you?

[kooktrash]

♡ electra heart ♡ | kim taehyung

summary ♡ just dumped by his cheating ex girlfriend, taehyung seeks help from the campus primadonna to make his ex jealous. y/n is spoiled, mean and filthy rich—everything his ex loathed. what happens when the two form a pretend relationship that leaves their hearts in great turmoil? welcome to the life of electra heart ♡

[primadonna—marina and the diamonds, {i know I’ve got a big ego, don’t know why it’s such a big deal though}] [bubblegum bitch {I’ll chew you up and spit you out, cause that’s what young love is all about}]

warnings: 12.5k. fake dating. idiots to lovers. smut. angst. mentions of cheating. tae gets cheated on. y/n is filthy rich and can be a bitch. missionary. kinda passionate. oral [f recieving] ex girlfriend ain’t shit. college au. light dirty talk if you squint. both have been heartbroken before. honestly kinda vanilla but rough? daddy issues. attachment issues. f!reader

There's very few things in this world that bring Taehyung to tears. These weren't even sad tears, he was just overwhelmingly pissed off. It's been a month and everyone tells him to get over it but how could he? His girlfriend of two years cheats on him for her stupid dance partner and he's just supposed to get over it? Pretend it never existed while they get to walk around campus like the happy couple? As if everyone didn't know she was in a relationship with Taehyung. As if there's not already talk of her infidelity? Of course he's mad. He's embarrassed. He's hurt.

"We just understand each other Tae, in a way you and I never would. I didn't mean to do this to you, it just sort of happened. Could we at least remain as friends?"

He scoffed out loud at the flashback. Like wow, how big of a dumbass did she play him for? Remain friends? Be for real Jisoo. Because he'd seriously just get over her betrayal so they could be friends.

"Incoming Bitch Alert, block his view," Jimin said forcing Namjoon to move in front of Taehyung. It only made him roll his eyes at their exaggerated efforts to not trigger him with the sight of his ex and her new boyfriend—or well, not new since they dated behind Taehyung's back for three months.

“You know, I've said this already but I'll say it again. A good rebound will really get you over her, y'know?" Jimin said as he threw his arm around Taehyung's shoulders as they headed to their next lecture. Namjoon shook his head, "Leave the guy to mourn, it's only been a month."

“Yeah, and you two talking about it every five seconds really isn't doing shit for me," Taehyung said clearly exasperated with the whole thing. He's tired of hearing about Jisoo. The more he hears about her the more difficult it is to not let his emotions go on a rampage. He just needed them to leave him alone to get over it on his own. He doesn't need their help. He doesn't need them bringing it up. He'll deal with it on his own, he's a big boy, shouldn't be hard.

“You're right, I'm sorry man, I'll stop talking about her," Jimin responded with an apology as he led the way to their lecture hall. It was some stupid prerequisite math class that clearly all of them have ignored until their last year of University. Jimin's grin widened as he took the other two down a row of seats exactly two rows behind the spectacle, "Look at the view."

Taehyung did as told following his friend's line of sight until he landed on two people drowning in Chanel couture. If he didn't know any better they'd look like they just hopped off a NY Fashion week catwalk. Namjoon spoke before Taehyung could and for that he was thankful. "You're obsession with Y/n L/n and her goons is getting scary Jimin. Besides, Y/n's too much of a snob to even look your way."

“I'd be a snob too if my father's net worth was in the millions," Jimin said completely dismissing everything else Namjoon said, "Plus it's not an obsession. It's an admiration. Unlike others who I will not name for personal reasons pertaining to my good friend Taehyung— Y/n doesn't pretend to be a saint. She's outwardly a brutal bitch and I applaud her for that. Too many girls act like the sweetest girls in the world only to stab you in the back. At least with her I know she'll tell it to my face."

“Way to generalize women," Taehyung pointed out as he set his laptop up for the lecture, "And just because you don't say Jisoo's name, doesn't mean I don't know who you're talking about."

“Never said it was about her but if the shoe fits," Jimin shrugged and the subject dropped. When the professor came in Taehyung tried focusing his attention on the lecture but it was hard when Jimin picked perfect seats to stare at the primadonna.

Taehyung knew you, not well but he's spoken to you before in passing. What he does know is what Jisoo used to tell him. The same old story of two best friends in middle school who took completely different paths in high school and University. In Jisoo's own words, 'Y/n ditched me for her rich friends and next thing you know I'm a nobody. That's why I hate her. She's the type to chew you up and spit you out when she's done.'

Taehyung obviously believed her at first. Jisoo was a sweet, fine arts major he met through theatre. She was kind and caring and was the exact type of person to betray your trust once she had it. Under the pretense of the 'sweet Angel' nobody would suspect her to be as ugly on the inside as she considered Y/n to be. Clearly you had been friends for a reason, except this time Jisoo had been on the outside of this so called cruelty you possessed.

As he studied you, he realized it was true that you could've hopped off the runway and came to class. With your Chanel black mini skirt, pink Chanel sweater, and silver Chanel charm bracelet, Taehyung could easily confuse you with a brand ambassador instead of a college student. You were clearly materialistic but that's all he could say on your character. He was done believing anything Jisoo said to him.

"Would it kill you to take your own notes?" Mira asked you once the lecture had been done and all you had managed to do was draw hearts and scribble your name in your notebook the entire time. You cling to her arm as the two of you begin to leave the auditorium, "Because I'm dumb. You know math isn't for me, please? I don't understand a thing that stupid ass professor says. I only understand the way you dumb down your notes for me."

"Why don't you just get your dad to pay him off for A's?" Mira joked as the two of you got to the door pushing past a group of three guys with your arms looped together at the elbows. You let out a dramatic sigh, "I tried but apparently that's illegal. Besides, straight A's is unrealistic. I'm a straight C student at best."

"Plus, my bestie is, like, Edison or something—" "Einstein?" "Yeah, exactly. You're really smart and you love me so you should tutor me—"

"No way! I love you but you're version of studying is taking five minutes to write down your objective then take a thirty minute online shopping break," Mira said only half joking. You stomped a foot in mini tantrum, "Fine. You suck anyway."

"Whatever, let's go to lunch before I starve to death and Jungkook eats all my teriyaki chicken."

You realized early on school just wasn't for you. It's not that you purposely chose to fail majority of your classes but more so information just didn't stick in your brain. Nothing processed and if it did and you'd do homework the right way, you'd bomb the test still. Though if you're being honest, you're not sure if you're good at anything.

You don't have a job. You don't do well in school. You don't know how to rely on anything but your dad's money so basically, you're a good-for-nothing.

"Need help?" A voice cut into your self deprecating thoughts and made you look up to the owner of it. You recognized him but he better not ask if you remember his name because you don't.

"No," You shook your head a little too quick to wave him off before whipping back around to face him, "We're in math together with professor dipshit, right?"

Taehyung's brows furrowed, "I think so?"

"Alright then help me find this book" You basically demanded as you showed him your phone screen where the text was pulled up. He narrowed his eyes trying to recognize the text before turning to look at you again, "You know you can find that book online for free, right?"

"Yeah but that just ruins the whole academia aesthetic, don't you think?" You asked and it gave him the opportunity to check you out. Sure enough, you were in a black and cream colored Prada preppy look today. He shrugged, "I guess? Come on, I'll show you where it's at."

"Thanks, you're a total doll. What's your name again?" You asked going on your phone to send texts as he led you to the right aisle. "Taehyung," he answered simply and he needs to explain himself. Yes this is the first time he's gone out of his way to actually talk to you but he's got a reason for it. He was just minding his business sitting over at the desk right by the aisle you had been searching through. You were mumbling to yourself and with the clack of your Miu Miu shoes he just couldn't concentrate, therefore he wanted to help you find whatever you were looking for and send you on your way.

"I'm Y/n," you said a little too late for him to remember you two were talking. He already knew your name but no way in hell was he going to admit that. As he turned down the right book aisle, his face turned to show distaste. Just down the other end was Jisoo and Hoseok. You noticed him hesitate but you went ahead and walked through anyway acting as if Jisoo wasn't even there. You didn't care enough about her to pay her any mind. She, on the other hand, had to do a double take when she caught Taehyung walking in with you.

"It should be around here," Taehyung said pointing to one of the book cases trying to ignore Jisoo there. You nodded taking a step back to get a better look and Taehyung tried helping you so he wouldn't look over at Jisoo knowing she was staring. You smiled widely hurrying to get closer as you reach an arm out to point, "I found it. Hold on."

He watched you stretch your arm up but it was just barely out of reach of your manicured nails and he moved closer to grab it. His side rubbed against yours unintentionally and he brought it down in front of you to your grabby hands. You cheered, "Yay, okay I'm gonna go buy it—"

"You could just borrow it from the library, I don't think they sell the books here. You'll have to go to the bookshop and order it to be shipped," Taehyung tried explaining but you were already to focused on the textbook. You waved a hand at him, "I'll forget to bring it back. Plus, they'll sell it to me, I'm very charming."

And rich, Taehyung thought but he only nodded watching you head off with a sway in your hips and he was hurrying to get away as fast as possible.

"Tae?" Crap.

"Hey," Taehyung said. Jisoo really did have the audacity to talk to him while the homewrecker was there. Still, he won't give her the luxury of knowing he's still hurt. Jisoo looked down the other end of the aisle where she got a clear view of you at the front desk chatting up with the librarian giving her compliments left and right.

"It's funny to catch you here, are you, um, are you friends with Y/n?" He visibly rolled his eyes at that as he looked to Hoseok who looked equally as uncomfortable as he did.

He opened his mouth to speak but he was immediately cut off by a hand on his arm pulling him back. He turned quickly, eyes widening at you holding a textbook and receipt, "Told you I'd get it, it's because of my charms—"

"Or your daddy's money," Jisoo cut in suddenly looking just as surprised as everyone else but her words. She didn't mean to say that out loud. Before Taehyung could even react, your eyes narrowed almost venomously, "Jisoo, jealousy and rudeness is ugly, but you manage to pull it off, don't you?"

"Just as ugly as your personality," Jisoo argued but you only smiled. "I think we both know there's nothing ugly about me." Taehyung looked back to you and yeah, nothing ugly about you. Not at all.

Jisoo looked to Taehyung to see if he'd say anything but he wouldn't. He wasn't her protective boyfriend anymore, Hoseok was and he was currently checking you out too.

You turned to Taehyung abruptly, "Can you help me find this one too?" You held up your phone and showed him another. With a small nod he was leaving his ex girlfriend for you.

It wasn't until later on in the day that he had a chance to talk to his friends about what happened in the library. Jimin looked excited listening to Taehyung's tale of the library incident and he practically cheered him on. Jimin pushed against his lunch tray creating a clanking noise that echoed in the lunch room, "Okay, okay, I've got the smartest idea ever!"

"What?" Namjoon asked slightly amused, slightly bored. Jimin grinned, "Jisoo hates Y/n so much so you should make her jealous. Let her see that you upgraded and chose someone better! Y/n is literally the perfect candidate. Jisoo loathes her and clearly Y/n gets under her skin over anything an—"

"No, I see where you're getting at and my answer is no," Taehyung shook his head as he got to his feet holding his empty tray, "I'm not using Y/n to make Jisoo jealous. I don't care how she feels and Y/n doesn't deserve being used like that."

"Bu—" Taehyung shut him up when he left to go discard his tray and leave the lunchroom. Was Jimin crazy? He didn't need anyone to fake date for Jisoo to know he's not still hung up on her. He's not hung up on her, he just can't wrap his mind around getting cheated on. That's what hurts.

The next time he saw you was in class and this time you were joined with a second goon. A guy with facial piercings and arm tattoos. Taehyung will admit, he didn't peg that guy as one of your friends, but then he saw the Vivienne Westwood necklaces the guy wore and it all became clear.

This time it was you who approached him first, Mira and Jungkook behind you as he started packing up after the lecture. You flashed him a pearly white smile, "Do you have a minute?"

Jimin and Namjoon shared a look before they began heading out leaving Taehyung behind. He nodded looking to your two friends in confusion. You cut in front of his vision, "So I was wondering if there was any way, you might tutor me? Mira hates me and Jungkook is just as dumb as me and I'm desperate for some help. I'll pay you and it can be whenever you're free."

So much was said to him in so little time it took him a second to wrap his mind around it all. He laughed nervously, "Tutor? Um, I'm not sure if I'm really cut up for the task."

"Ugh, please? Please with a cherry on top? Pretty please? Please?" You repeated over and over again, "Please?"

"Alright, alright, when were you thinking of getting started?" He asked with a defeated sigh. He caved and now he understood how your charms worked. You smiled widely, "Yay and um, now? Today? Yesterday? ASAP? Are you busy right now?"

"Uh, no I was just gonna do some homework before my next class bu—" "Perfect, okay I'll see you guys later, Taehyung and I are gonna study," You waved off the other two and they left with small hugs. He was quickly realizing you of you wanted something, you wanted it now. He looked at you debating if he was amused or exasperated but he still nodded, "Alright, should we go to the library?"

"It's too stuffy in there, how about a café? I'm in desperate need of coffee."

So that's what happened. He joined you at a café and you ordered you both drinks and pastries and when he offered to pay, you waved him off. "So, did you take any notes from today's lecture?"

"Uh, about that. Professor Dipshit talks so fast and his handwriting is so ugly I just can't get it all down," you handed him your notebook and he couldn't help but smile despite his confusion. You did get some things down but on the sides of the pages were little doodles. He hid his smile, "Professor Choi does write ugly so that's understandable. And it's okay, you can copy my notes and just ask me questions about whatever you're confused about. I'm gonna try and do some assignments in the meantime."

Your eyes softened. Wow, he agreed with you instead of lecturing you. You nodded taking his laptop and writing down the notes. You didn't actually ask him that many questions but it's probably because he'd broken his notes down for himself and you could understand them. He was a couple years ahead of you but he was in the class and clearly smarter than you. Despite the study session going perfect without a hitch in the road, it seemed like Taehyung was just forced to relive the constant flashback of catching Jisoo with Hoseok.

You noticed right away how Taehyung seemed to stiffen at the sight and when Jisoo turned to look at him and then glare at you, you knew something was up. You leaned into him, "So what's the deal between you and Jisoo?"

His brows furrowed. Did you really not know? "We dated." That made you even more confused as you shamelessly checking him out. For some reason the look in your eyes as you did so was enough to boost his confidence that Jisoo tore down. "Really? You're way hotter than her."

"Uh, thanks? We just had very similar interests and I don't know. It just happened," Taehyung said even though you didn't ask. You simply nodded in understanding before letting the topic drop. Taehyung took notice of the way you didn't try and talk about her more and it was like a breath of fresh air but he just had to know more. "So, uh, in the library the other day. You two were kind of hostile toward each other. Do you know her well too?"

You didn't shy away from talking despite Jisoo just feet away telling her order to the cashier. You wouldn't care if she heard you either. As a matter of fact, you hope she can hear you. You nodded, "We used to be classmates and we were super close around middle school until one day we got into this huge fight before high school. She said I would always leave her out to hang with Mira and Jungkook. I tried asking her to hang out and I'd even offer to pay and stuff but I guess it just wasn't enough. I felt bad because I didn't mean to make her feel that way but I guess I'm just an awful person so whatever. We drifted apart in high school and that was the end of that."

Taehyung was actually surprised with how open you were about things. He's not sure what made him be so open despite his embarrassment, "She cheated on me with Jung Hoseok."

"That bitch!" You said much louder than expected and heads turned including Jisoo's. Her brows furrowed and before Taehyung could tell you to bring it down, Jisoo was walking over with a plastered fake smile. "Funny seeing you two here."

"What do you want?" You asked looking up at her as Taehyung did too. Your hand was awfully close to his and as if sensing Jisoo's focus on it, you went ahead and reached for it and put your hand over his. He looked down at the way your small hand rested over his and he turned to Jisoo immediately.

"I was just surprised to see you two, I didn't know you were friends with Y/n, Tae," Jisoo said and he could tell she was annoyed. You rolled your eyes, "I'm confused, does it look like we care at all about what you don’t know?"

"Was I talking to you?" Jisoo asked narrowing her eyes at you before looking to Taehyung who didn't say anything. You smiled sweetly squeezing his hand, "You were talking around me so I answered. If you don't like it then that's not really my problem now is it?"

Taehyung bit his lip turning to Jisoo, "Y/n let's go somewhere else. It's crowded in here." Jisoo didn't move back as the two of you stood and Taehyung looked bored looking at her and it just confused her more and more. Since when were you Taehyung's type? You smiled and left.

"God, I can't stand cheaters," you said once you two were outside in the cold air that had you shivering. You turned to him immediately, "Sorry, I shouldn't have said anything. And sorry for holding your hand. I wanted her to get mad."

Taehyung was beginning to realize you weren't a bitch. Okay, scratch that, you kinda were but it wasn't for no reason. You were just brazenly honest and outspoken. You didn't care about being confronted and you didn't back down from it either. Yeah, you came off intimidating but you actually weren’t. Maybe you were just misunderstood.

"So, uh, just kick me in the balls if this is rude to say but... uh... clearly Jisoo seeing me with you pisses her off," Taehyung began and you were already amused, "So uh... you know... uh... I just don't want her to think I'm still hung up on her. And... I don't know—"

"Want me to be your fake girlfriend to make her regret ever cheating on someone as hot as you?" You said it like it was a small favor, "Yeah sure."

He practically short circuited trying to understand everything you said. Well you sure knew how to make a guy confident about his looks and he appreciated that. He's never been an insecure guy but after getting cheated on he's become one. Just constantly thinking about how he wasn't good enough. Still, he stares at you, "Really? Why are you so okay with me using you to make her jealous?"

"Because I don't care," you shrugged, "My dad’s always badgering me about a stupid boyfriend he approves but I don’t really care. And also I hate cheaters. Plus I'm bored and it sounds fun making someone who hates me just hate me more."

He couldn't believe everything you said. No, he didn't believe it. He's convinced you're playing a part, the primadonna. The 'big ego, no cares in the world, everything her way' type. It made it seem like you didn't have any dimension and he knew you did. Still, the vengeful side of him wanted to make her pay, "Okay, then that's my payment for tutoring you. Deal?"

"Let me pay you in cash," you said but he shook his head already walking ahead of you.

      So it started. He came over to your penthouse apartment the next day in clear awe by everything inside it and the pool on the balcony. There was even someone in the kitchen cooking. You led him further in pointing to the woman in the kitchen, "Lee this is my boyfriend Taehyung. Taehyung this is Lee, she makes wonderful food."

The woman bowed in greeting and he did the same before following you up the marble staircase to the second floor.

"Sorry, Lee works for my dad so I made sure to say you're my boyfriend. I just love getting under his skin," you explained as he joined you in one of the rooms upstairs. It didn't seem like your bedroom since it was missing a bed but instead looked like an upstairs living room. He just nodded, "Are you close with your dad?"

"Not really," you said with a shrug already on your phone, "He just buys me whatever I want because he’s a shitty dad.”

jungkook: yacht party on Saturday

jungkook: who's coming

yoongi: not me. I'm planning on sleeping all weekend

mira: sleep with the sharks

you: me and my boyf :p

jungkook: WHOOOOO

you: :p

"What about your mom?" He asked trying to understand you better but the more you spoke the more confused he was. You came off as spoiled and a snob but at the same time you didn’t. Alright, you probably were spoiled but there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s the snob part that gets hate and now that he’s talked to you, you don’t even seem like that. You didn't bother looking up at him as you smiled at your friends responses. You shrugged, "Left one day after catching my dad sleeping with his secretary."

Well that explains why you're so willing to help make his cheating ex jealous. But still, he kinda felt bad involving you now. "Y/n—"

"I know so cliché," you rolled your eyes cutting him off before he could get sappy, "Like couldn't he cheat with anyone other than his secretary? Lacks originality if you ask me."

"Okay, here's the plan," you said smiling now and he almost couldn't keep up with your mood change, "Yacht party this weekend. We'll take couple pics, post on your socials and make sure Jisoo sees them. We'll probs have to post a kissing one or something to seem more believable."

"Why are you doing this?" He asked but you didn't even flinch. "What do you mean?"

"I mean come on, you say you're doing it cause you're bored and you want your dad to think you're in a relationship but why?" He asked moving closer to you so you couldn't hide behind your phone, "Why are you helping me? If you wanted your dad to think you're dating, you could have any guy you want. Isn't there someone you're into? I just feel bad using you."

“You’re not using me,” You rolled your eyes as if to say he was the one being unreasonable, "And because all the guys on campus are just... ugh. At least you're cute and not using me as a bragging right. Though if you do I'll hire someone to kill you and hide the body."

Part of him wanted to say he changes his mind. He can't use you for his stupid revenge because it wasn't it. The other part of him knew how much you got under Jisoo's skin and he wanted her to feel angry about it. He wanted her to see that he did in fact trade her in for someone better and he wants her to hurt like he did. Who better to use than the girl everyone loves and loves to hate? He knows he's being petty but it's just not fair. What did he lack that made Jisoo cheat on him?

On Saturday he felt like he stuck out like a sore thumb. Everyone was in designer swimwear including yourself while he wore something from the department store. Of course you told him it didn't matter because you were hotter than the other guys and it did make him feel a little better but not much. He tried not to think about how shameless you were with compliments. He wasn't going to be one of those guys who falls for you. Everyone knows you’re a heartbreaker and he can see why. You’re just so… he can’t explain it, there’s just something about you and it wasn’t just your looks or your money. Still, he’s gotta not let what you say get to his head. You said it yourself, you're only doing this cause you're bored so he needs to take what you say lightly.

"So you're Y/n's new boy toy," Yoongi said shortly after you introduced them to each other before leaving to take pictures with some of your other friends. Taehyung stood against the railing of the yacht when Yoongi approached him. His eyes narrowed clearly taking offense to that, "And you are?"

"I'm one of Y/n's friends, Yoongi," the guy said in greeting and Taehyung just nodded making him laugh, "Relax. I was kidding. Well I wasn't but who cares. Where is Y/n anyway?"

Taehyung pointed you out just as you took a picture with two guys and Yoongi smacked his lips, "Better be careful. Y/n's a slippery one. She gets bored easily." The guy left at that and though Taehyung didn't want to listen to him he suddenly grew worried. You were supposed to be fake dating, right? So he should be the one taking pictures with you. Yeah, that's right. He's here to make Jisoo jealous and he can't do that from all the way over here.

"Let's take a picture," Taehyung said confidently entrusting Mira with his cellphone cutting in between you and the other guys who glared at him. "Taehyungie!" You threw your arms around his neck, "Everyone move, I need pictures with my boyfriend."

Hey. Why'd he like that? Jisoo hated PDA and though he wasn't a huge fan, he liked people knowing he was in a relationship despite how private it might be. Just so people could back off though that never stopped Hoseok. The first picture was cute, a simple smiling one and the second was of you cupping his chin forcing him to make a pout with mad eyebrows while you smiled brightly. Jisoo always took serious pictures and it was always a one and done thing.

Next, he surprised himself by kissing your forehead as you smiled into the camera, hand on his chest while his was around your waist. It’s just, he could acting affectionate with you even if it’s fake. With Jisoo everything they did was always stiff. He was beginning to understand how he wasn’t as happy with Jisoo at the end of the relationship.

Mira groaned, "Ugh how many more? You two are making me sick."

"One more," you said and before Taehyung could figure out what the next one was, you were leaning up to plant a kiss on his lips. He reacted almost immediately, bringing you closer letting himself kiss you back. It was longer than necessary for a picture. You pulled away turning to Mira and taking Taehyung's phone. You began scrolling through the pictures while Taehyung wiped your lip gloss off the corners of his numb lips. It felt like every guy on the boat was glaring at him, and they were.

The next time you two acted like a couple was at a party. Taehyung was nervous at first because he knew Jisoo would be here and probably with Hoseok. You were dressed in a lavender colored mini dress that hugged your curves in all the right places. It was hard for him not to notice you when you just grabbed everyone’s attention.

“Jisoo’s here,” you whispered into his ear as his arm went around your waist. So far, Jisoo hasn’t seen you two outwardly act like a couple. She did look at Taehyung’s Instagram story where he posted the two pictures where you kissed and cupped his face in a cute way. Still there’s no way to tell how she felt about it but now she’d get a good view of them now.

Jimin and Namjoon seemed just as surprised as everyone else when he posted those pictures of you and when they came over they looked ready to ask all the questions. You must’ve sensed it because with a press of your lips on his cheek you were moving away, “I’m gonna get a drink.”

He waited for you to go before turning to his friends. Jimin smacked his arm, “You sneaky little shit! Never though to tell us how you managed to pull Y/n. I thought she wasn’t your type.”

“I never said that,” Taehyung said nervously as he felt Jisoo’s stare at him from across the floor. The music was loud and there were a lot of people but you didn’t seem shy at all. He knows this isn’t your scene. Your scene is parties on a yacht and beach parties, not college parties in someone’s dingy apartment. Still, he’s thankful you didn’t seem all that bothered by it. Sure, the second you walked you basically gagged at the smell of beer and sweat but you’ve been holding up pretty well. Even if he did see you pull out a hand wipe to rid yourself of germs and clutched your wallet closer. Now your wallet is in his pocket. God Forbid anything happened to your dad’s Gold and Black express card for the ultra rich.

“Well you sure as hell acted like it whenever I talked about my Queen. Also, kinda mad at you for stealing my crush but I forgive you because you’ve been having shitty luck with girls,” Jimin said and that made Taehyung gulp. How can he tell his best friend you’re only fake dating? Sure, Jimin had originally come up with the idea but it’s embarrassing to actually go through with it.

“I know Jisoo is shitting bricks over it,” Namjoon said with a little laugh, “She hates Y/n.”

Jisoo had always been one of those ‘peace&love’ girlies who preached positivity and women supporting women. Yet she never had a problem ranting to Taehyung about how materialistic and a bitch you were. She’d practically slut shame you any chance she had and Taehyung wouldn’t do anything but listen to his girlfriend complain. Now he obviously feels bad for not speaking up but what would he have even said when he knew nothing about you at the time to form his own opinion?

He also notices that Jisoo was more obsessed with talking about you than you were with her. It’s like you didn’t even talk about her unless it was about him and he found himself happy to know you were defensive and sort of protective over him.

“Talking about me?” You asked sauntering over in your pretty dress that made Taehyung bring his cup to his lips to avoid from letting his jaw drop. Jimin practically stuttered, “I-I’m Jimin.”

You smiled almost teasingly, “I know. TaeTae talks about you two all the time.” They looked at Taehyung with furrowed brows as if asking, TaeTae? but all he did was shrug. He’s getting used to it but he won’t deny it sounded way more affectionate than Tae—which was what Jisoo called him. Plus it seemed like the exact kind of nickname you’d call him like when you call your friends baby or refer to strangers as Queen, Kings, and Royals for inclusivity. You talked like a California valley girl always saying ‘like’ or ‘duh’ sometimes ‘obvi’.

“Give me,” Taehyung reached for your cup and you tilted it against his lips but you took him by surprise when you pressed your lips against his practically taking back whatever was poured down his throat. It was nasty but in a hot way and it definitely caused a shock factor.

His friends in particular looked a mixtures off confused and slightly intrigued or jealous but he wasn’t thinking about that right now. Namjoon was the first to look away, “I need a drink,” and Jimin followed.

“Is Jisoo still looking?” You said between a kiss and it took him a second to process what you had said, still kissing you. He pulled away, “Hm?”

“Jisoo Dummy, is she still staring?” You asked, hand on his neck trailing down over his shirt almost teasingly. He brought his cup up to quench his dry throat as his eyes scanned over the group of people and sure enough, she was. Oh yeah. That’s why you kissed. Haha.

“Yeah,” he said pressing his lips against yours again, a little tongue poking out to lick against yours one last time before pulling away. This time, instead of wiping your gloss off himself, you ran your thumb over his soft lips until it was off him.

“Careful baby,” you said with that teasing smile as his hand rested on your lower back just above your butt, “Kiss me again and I think you might fall for me.”

“Can’t have that, can we? You’ll break my heart,” he’s not sure why he said that nor why it bothered him that you didn’t deny it.

You two stayed against the wall for majority of the night. His hands kept finding ways to touch you and you did the same. It was easy to believe you were a real couple aside from your occasional comments about someone being hot that did get under his skin just a little. He just had to keep reminding himself none of it was real. That you were simply doing him a favor.

He wasn’t paying enough attention to his surroundings when a group of people passed extremely close to you two. It wasn’t until one of the girls passing had been shoved by her friend, and clear liquid went flying straight toward you two, mostly you. It seemed to go quiet for a second as your jaw dropped in clear shock. The cold liquid smelled of Vodka and it splashed onto the top of your dress down your cleavage.

“Oh my god, Y/n, I’m so sorry,” the girl stuttered holding her empty cup. Taehyung stiffened as your eyes turned razor sharp glaring at the girl. The nice smile you once had replaced by a deep scowl. Taehyung reached for you but you shooed his hands away. Without another word you tilted your cup splashing her with alcohol too and everyone gasped but no one said anything to you. You crushed the cup dropping it on the floor as you smiled tightly, “There, we’re even right?”

The girl didn’t say anything, still holding her wet clothes away from her body. Hers had been an accident but yours was completely on purpose. Though, everyone knows you could’ve handled that much more viciously so nobody argued. You looked at her, “Right?”

“Right,” she mumbled, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” you said, “But maybe you should get friends who don’t get you in trouble, right?”

“Y/n,” Taehyung said but you brushed him off. “I want to go, now.” He nodded pushing off the wall and leaving with you, “You didn’t have to do th—“

“I don’t care,” you said walking ahead of him to the door, “It was her fault anyway.”

“Yeah bu—“

“Oh my God Taehyung I don’t need you lecturing me. I don’t care. I don’t feel bad and nothing you say will change my mind. If you don’t like it then you can leave me alone,” you said crudely. It was like a flip was switched and this was the first time Taehyung saw firsthand how mean you could be.

“I don’t care about what you say either then,” Taehyung didn’t back down as the two of you went to his car, “I know you regret blowing up because you’re not a mean person unless provoked.”

You scoffed, “That’s what you thin—“

“I know,” he argued, “So stop making yourself the bad guy because you’re upset. It was an accident and you know it.”

“If you’re not gonna shut up about it then I’ll just walk home,” you said stubbornly and it was driving him crazy. But he wasn’t regretting being with you? He knows you’re not mean like that. You just snapped before you could think and because everyone’s used to it they didn’t expect anything different. You’re not like that. Not once since he’s hung out with you have you been rude to anyone but Jisoo so he refuses to believe you’re just a bitch because you can be.

His silence was annoying you and so you turned and started walking. He wanted to rip his hair out. Why were you being so difficult and why did he care about his pretend girlfriend acting out? He groaned in frustration as he went after you. “Y/n, get your ass in the car.”

“No,” you said but before you could make it another step, an arm was around your waist pulling you back and your feet lifted off the ground. “Put me down!”

“Alright, once we get to the car,” he said carrying you to it, “You wanna be rude that’s fine but you’re not doing it with me. So sit down and drop the attitude. I’m taking you home.”

He huffed in annoyance as he slammed your door shut and made his way around to his side. There’s no way his pretend girlfriend was getting him so worked up. And why was he putting up with the attitude when he could’ve easily let you go?

     It went on like this for a few days. For some reason, you were a great pretender. Nobody could even tell you weren't actually dating, not even Jimin or Namjoon. And okay, one could say you actually were together but you both knew that's not true. When he went shopping with you, you shamelessly flirted with another guy in front of him. It's not like any of them knew about your deal so you didn't care. He didn't care either. You urged him to get the number of one of the baristas one day while studying and he's not sure why but he did. He never even called or texted the girl. And you two seemed to just never speak about what happened at the party. The next day you were all smiles on FaceTime showing him all the clothes and shoes you’d just bought and he was telling you which ones were his favorite.

He knew it really was getting under Jisoo's skin, mostly because she wasn't hiding it. Suddenly she's bumping into him all the time, trying to talk to him, anything when after they broke up she avoided him. It drove her crazy knowing he was with you, especially after the night of the party

Taehyung hated rude people and yet he let you get away with being a snobby bitch at the party. Of course she didn’t know how he gladly told you what you did was wrong but she hated that he just… didn’t care? One time Jisoo was rude to a sever because she was on her period and Taehyung was genuinely upset with her because of it. Why did you just get to get away with it? He just seemed willing to put up with you more than he ever did with Jisoo.

And now he was having dinner with you and your dad at some expensive restaurant with aquariums between every booth. He'd never even met Jisoo's parents in the two years he dated her. He tried not to talk too much but your father was relentless, "So Taehyung, what do your parents do?"

"You don't have to answer that," you said and for some reason, Taehyung was able to notice your bitter mood today. Your dad scoffed, "He does if he's going to date my daughter."

"They're farmers sir," Taehyung said and suddenly it went quiet with you looking at him now too. Your father just nodded, "Farming? Are they part of the Agriculture Union?"

"No sir, they are independently farmers. We only have an acre of farm land but since we lived in the countryside it supplies us really well," Taehyung told him despite sensing your father's disapproval. Why would you choose him if your dad clearly didn't like anything he was saying? He felt his nerves growing as if he should seek your father's approval even if you weren't actually dating.

"Oh my God," you said suddenly, "I wanna visit some time." He didn't know if you were being serious or not but he took pride in it anyway. Your father on the other hand, snickered, "You can't wear Jimmy Choo's in dirt. You wouldn't survive a day doing hard labor. So tell me Taehyung... and you can be honest with me. I prefer it that way."

"Why are you with my daughter?" He asked Taehyung, "What does some farm boy probably here on a scholarship want with Y/n? Hoping to leach off her allowance?"

"Wow dad, way to be supportive," you said suddenly, "You know what? Why don't you write a check and send him on his way, while you're at it. And don't say you haven't done that before."

"For your own good. You love to help the less fortunate and then what happens? You get bored and come crawling back asking for a new handbag," your dad said looking to Taehyung now, "You hear that? She trades in boys as much as she does shoes so if you think some guy from a small farm has a ch—"

"Y/n, we're leaving," Taehyung stood suddenly, "Get your things and let's go."

Your dad only laughed some more as you quickly stood never seeing Taehyung so serious. He took your hand in his while the other went to your lower back and he turned to glare at your father, "You know, not everything is about money and if you realized that sooner then you'd understand what it means to want to be with someone because you care about them. And I doubt you have the decency to treat any woman with respect enough to love them and not tear them down."

You didn't even have time to process what Taehyung just said before he was pulling you away. It wasn't until the two of you were outside that he cracked, "Fuck Y/n I am so sorry. I am so sorry, fuck I didn't mean to talk to your dad like that but it just pissed me off so much. He has no right to talk about you in that way even if he's your father, not after everything he's done to ruin your family an—Oh God, I am so fucking sorry."

"I'm sorry."

He quite literally froze on the spot. He turned to you with confused written all over his face and it wasn't until he paid closer attention that he realized you were crying. Oh fuck he's made you cry. Immediately he went to you, "Hey, hey, look I'm sorry. I have no right to say anything about you or your family. You can tell your dad you dumped me for being rude an—"

"I don't care about that," you said pushing him away, "I'm sorry that he said those things about you and your parents. It was mean and you didn't deserve that. It's what he does. He knows every woman in his life can't stand him and I'm the only one he has control over so he ruins everything. He should've never brought it u—"

He shut you up the only way he knew how now. With his hands cupping your face and his lips pressed against yours. He didn't care what your dad said and how much money he had. How could a guy not born into money care about things like that? After blowing up on your dad instead of being mad, you cried because you thought your dad hurt his feelings. You put him first before yourself even if your dad punished you for Taehyung's outburst. Maybe that's why you chose to go along with Taehyung, because your dad was the way he was but he didn't care. All he cared about was how everyone painted you the bitch, the primadonna, the spoiled one when deep down you actually cared a lot. And okay, yes, you could be mean, he gets that now and he’s willing to get you to not let your emotions run your mood with everyone.

Neither one of you seemed to care about being on the sidewalk until a car honked at the two of you and you were pulling away. He took your hand, "I'll take you home."

The ride was quiet but not in a bad way. There was like a shift in the atmosphere and Taehyung didn't want you to go. So, when he pulled up to your apartment and you hesitated, "Want to come in?" He was quick to say. "Let me park."

He didn't even give you time to respond before he was driving away to the parking garage. Once he found a spot the two of you stepped out and headed up the elevator neither saying anything now. When you unlocked your front door you asked, "Want anything to drink?"

It seems like neither one of you were ready to actually say anything more other than what was surface level. Still, the both of you seemed to be walking the usual path upstairs but instead of staying in the living room you walked to your bedroom. He followed after and watched you sit on your bed. You pat the spot next to you and he's quick to sit. This time, you're the one to make the move bringing his lips to hers. He only pecked your lips softly, testing the waters for this moment right here.

As if finding the answers he captured your lips in an intense kiss letting himself melt into it. It's kind of like the first kiss you shared on the yacht. Your hand was on his neck now as his lips started moving against yours hungrily. You could barely match his pace despite initiating the kiss. It made you smile into at the thought that he was eager.

Taehyung soon parted your lips slightly with his and you felt his wet tongue dart out to slide against mine gently.

You began leaning back making him follow after you until you were lying in your bed with Taehyung hovering over you. He pulled back looking down at you with round eyes. You smiled, "Why'd you stop?"

He laughed softly at your forwardness before remembering your current situation. He dipped his head lower until his mouth pressed against your neck. He lifted his hand off the bed slipping towards your jaw as he grabbed it and titled your head backwards to get better access. Your lips came up around him making him lay between them and making the kiss a little more intimate. He kissed up to your neck until he was at your jaw.

Taehyung left soft kisses along the curve of your before breaking away to meet your lips again. Your hands ran over his shirt until you were inching it up his back forcing him to step back until you took it off him. He smiled, "It's just like you to get straight to the point."

"Right now I want you. Can't I show it?" you asked and for some reason that made his heart jump. He didn't say anything instead reaching for your shirt and lifting it off too. He could be just as forward as you. His hands were at your sides immediately trailing to your rib cage as he leaned back down to capture you in a kiss again.

He slid them over your bra and without thinking, squeezed a little. His eyes were closed so he felt around blindly when you pushed them further into his hands as he slid it down.

To be honest, you didn't expect him to be as forward as he was but you definitely liked it. Never one to shy away from getting sexual you were pulling on your skirt making him moved down to help you take it off. He went ahead and unbuttoned his jeans too kicking them off before moving to crawl over you again. Before he could you were pushing him down and straddling his lap moving to untie your bra leaving you in just your underwear. His eyes darted to look at every exposed part of your body not shy to stare are your breasts in awe. His lips parted slightly as you leaned back down connecting yours to them.

He let his hands cup your tits feeling the softness of them on his palms, digging his fingers in just slightly. Taehyung's hips began to move on their own, lightly bucking against you. Your underwear was tiny, barely covering anything and yet it's what he expected you to wear. Not that he's thought about you naked, maybe. But it's just that you're the bold type and that's what made you attractive. With only your underwear and his in the way, he could feel almost everything including the way he was basically humping right between your entrance toward your clit. The makeout was quickly escalating and his member was hardening rather quickly.

You moaned softly as his thumbs ran over your nipples and his tongue teased yours slightly messy. Taehyung's covered member was hitting against your clit to the point where you found yourself matching his movements. You wanted him now and for more than just kissing, so you began to slide off him. His head follows yours so the kiss wouldn't break but you pushed against his chest to keep him down. Your hand traces down his body and reaches the over his clothed cock palming him firmly. Taehyung instantly sighs at the touch letting himself relax back down.

Your head reaches his dick and you slowly pull down his briefs solely focused on what you were about to do exposing his hard dick. You smiled looking up at him anything but innocent. He waits to see what you do next and his breath hitched as you reach for his member bringing it closer to your face. Just like that, your tongue was licking along the length.

When you reached the tip you put in your mouth, lips suctioning around the head letting your tongue swipe against the slit. He was in Head Heaven, your mouth felt so warm and wet. His hand moved into your hair not pulling it just keeping your head in place when you began to bob. Your jaw relaxed some more and you were able to move your tongue down his side playing with the extra skin.

"Fuck" Taehyung moans, "You're sucking my cock so good, fuck Y/n." His hand started to bob your head up and down at a faster pace while your hand made a fist around what ever didn't fit in your mouth. His hips met your mouth soft making him hit the back of your throat and he watched closely as you took him in. He wouldn't last long, "I'm close."

You made sure to add more tongue as you wanted him to break apart in your mouth and went rougher. He gripped your hair even tighter, and that excited you knowing he was close. As if reading your mind, he was tapping your cheek lightly, "I want you to ride me. Now."

You didn't pull back even as he moved to sit up making him hiss in pleasure, "Y/n, wait..." Your hand lowered to his balls and with that he knew he had to have you now. He was gripping your hair lightly pulling you back with his hand on your arm to lift you and this time you moved. "Condom?" He asked you and you went straight to your nightstand to grab one.

He took it from you patting your thigh letting you know he wanted you on the bed now. You lied on your pillows as he slipped the condom on stroking himself gently as he made his way between your legs. One hand pushed against the bed near your head and his other lined his member with your pussy. Taehyung's hair was covering your view of his eyes but you could see the way he licks his lips, his tip pressing against your clit watching your hips buck up for more friction. Without wasting another member, he was costing his cock with your slick and sinking into your entrance slowly. His eyes train on yours as he slowly starts moving his hips testing to see how much he could move. You wrapped a hand behind his neck making him lean down and his hips began moving more firmly. His knees pressed into the mattress just below your vent legs and he thrusted more intentionally now.

Taehyung's chest pressed against your t his head fall between your shoulder and neck but turned his head to capture your lips. You moaned bro find a hand down to his lower back, "Harder."

That made him groan, sucking harshly on your neck as he began a rhythmic stroke, roughly fucking you. Neither one of you were necessarily talkers during sex but with the mix of grunts and moans there wasn't much to be said. You both felt so fucking good and your legs wrapped around his waist trapping him in to brutally fuck you.

"Fuck," he growled, hand suddenly going behind your head forcing it against his neck as he lifted your body every time he rocked into you. You couldn't help but moan at the sudden aggressiveness and welcomed it eagerly. You were close. You haven't had sex in a couple months and Taehyung just felt so good. You've been worked up since the second you started making out.

"I'm gonna cum," you panted sound muffled against his hot neck but his hand gripped your hair pulling you away.

"Kiss me," he all but demanded changing his rhythm to be slow but still rough letting you feel every inch. You did as told kissing him hard as he began rutting up his entire body to get deeper, hitting all the right places.

"Cum," he whispered against your lips and it was the only thing you needed to hear before tightening your walls around him with a whine. He groaned loudly against your lips, falling right behind you releasing into the condom. Your body trembled slightly coming down from your high and he let you cling to him.

He pulled away from your bruising lips looking down at you all fucked out. He swallowed the lump in his throat as he moved his hand from behind your head and pushed against the bed to lift himself out.

You just sighed clearly exhausted but in a good way, shimmying up your bed and combing your hair out of your face.

Taehyung took the condom off tying the end and throwing it on the floor unsure what to do. Did you want him to stay or leave? He would like to stay and possibly get some post-sex intimacy but he's not sure if you're about that. You flashed him one of your infamous smiles and reached a hand out to him. He moved to lie down next to you pulling the blanket over the both of you as you attempted to catch your breaths.

You snuggle up to his side on his arm and the other he brings behind his head looking down at you. With the hand behind your head he started playing with your hair.

He couldn't tell if this pent-up hunger for sex of if it was something more. Is he ready for it to be more? Do you even want it to be more? It was hard to tell how you felt because up until this point you've passive with your emotions. You radiated the idea of being carefree and he wonders if this was one of those times you're just doing what you want.

"We've got that exam in class tomorrow," Taehyung said instead of asking what he really wanted to know. He's scared if he talks about anything else you'll draw back. You groaned into his chest, "Don't remind me."

"I've gotta, as your tutor it's my job," he said with a smirk when you rolled your eyes.

You walked into the lecture the next day talking with Jungkook. Taehyung had his last class end early so he got to the room quicker than you. You do sit near each other but mostly because you two were apparently dating. Your friends didn't know that it had all started because you and Taehyung were talking about Jisoo. You're not sure how it's escalated into what it is now and you also don't know how to feel about it all.

You took the seat next to him with Jungkook on your right and Taehyung looked just as hesitant saying hi to you as you did him. Jimin and Namjoon came in moments later waving to you. With that, Taehyung took your hand in his under the table and tried ignoring how awkward it felt. After what happened last night Taehyung ended up leaving. You two talked for a while but laying together like suddenly felt awkward and it was clear you two were done seeing each other.

Taehyung just had so much to think about. He couldn't understand how he felt about everything happening. At first, when Jisoo dumped him that's all he could think about. How she could sit there and admit she cheated and then dump her like it was completely her choice. You've always been in the back of his head but never in the forefront. Now that you were he just felt indifferent and guilty. Indifferent because he's clearly into your but he's not sure if he's ready for that.

It's only been about three months since the breakup and you came along a month after it happened. Can anyone see why he feels indifferent? He likes you but he wasn't in the right place to ask you to be his pretend girlfriend and even though he likes to think it was a mutual thing, he brought it up first.

But he also feels guilty because he doesn't want you thinking he slept with you and did all this for a rebound. Having sex with you wasn't something that had been on his mind despite his attraction toward. Of course he thought you were attractive from before he ever approached you. You were the type that someone passing will notice and with Jisoo always bringing you up with Jimin it was hard for him to ignore. There has just always been something intriguing about you and he can't deny that. But he never thought about sex.

Even when he got closer to you it had just been about him liking getting to know you. You weren't afraid to be loud or do something funny and that's how he was too. He found himself smiling whenever you did something. He liked talking to you and letting you go on rants about literally anything that annoyed you even the slightest.

Still, it wasn't until after last night when he had dinner with his dad did he realize just how much it is now. He was able to suppress it till now but he's not sure he can go back after sleeping with you.

Once the exam was complete he took your hand in his, “Can we talk?”

“We can do whatever, we’re dating right?” You said it out loud before turning to Jungkook and Mira, “I’ll see you later.”

Taehyung’s friends left too and suddenly it was just you. You left the lecture hall and moved your hand out of his to take your lip gloss out of your bag. You held a compact mirror out as you reapplied a thin layer to your lips and smacked them in a kiss. He didn’t say anything but his curiosity was killing him. You were clearly acting distant.

“So what do you want to say?” You asked him and he just bit his lower lip. He’s not sure he can say anything now. You didn’t seem to be in the best mood today and he’s worried you’ll suddenly tell him to fuck off or something. Why do you confuse him so damn much?

“Nevermind,” he sighed, “I’ve gotta get to class.”

“Whatever.”

That made him freeze, hand on his backpack strap debating if he really should just talk to you. No. He can’t. You’re in a fake relationship, right? Minus the benefit that is. So he just left in defeat.

“Are you two in a fight?” Mira asked you the following Friday at another party. The only reason you came is because Mira was hooking up with the guy throwing it and you had nothing better to do. It’s not that you’ve been avoiding Taehyung but you know you’ve been distant. You’re really only show affection to him around Jisoo but it doesn’t matter. You’re not actually dating. It’s all pretend. You’re just bored and having sex was a one time thing due to your emotions being high because of your stupid ass dad.

Real relationships are stupid and too much work.

You’ll admit you didn’t think about him being at this party so you didn’t even bring it up. Now he’s standing across the room looking at you. You just turned away, “No, just tired of him at the moment.”

“I don’t believe you but whatever,” Mira said with a shrug, “Let’s go look at what to drink.”

“Finally tired of him?” Jungkook asked with a laugh, “I figured. He didn’t seem like your type.”

“Why?” You asked suddenly defensive, “He’s hot.”

“Yeah but he’s actually a good person. You? Not so mu—ow!” He groaned when you pulled on his ear. “Talk to me like that again.”

“Please, not like I’m lying,” Jungkook shrugged you off.

“Go talk to Y/n,” Namjoon told Taehyung, “I don’t know why you two are fighting but go work it out.”

He wanted to argue and say no but he’s supposed to be your boyfriend. He had to care that you two were fighting and so he left his friends to go to you. “Y/n.”

“What?” You asked turning away from your friends. He sighed, “Come here.”

You did as told going over to him, “What?”

“Are you mad at me? Did I do something wrong? Why are you so distant?” He rushed every question on his mind out, “Was it because of the other night?”

“Sure.”

Your response made him scoff, “No. Don’t brush me off. Answer my questions.”

“I don’t want to,” you said with a sigh looking around, “I need a drink so I’m gonna go.”

He reached for your hand but you were already gone. With a groan in frustration he turned away immediately. He needed some air to think and so he walked passed his friends to the balcony door with a sign that said nobody could go through.

“Trouble in paradise?”

Taehyung couldn’t help the way his eyes rolled in annoyance ignoring Jisoo. Still, she came over to where he was against the railing, “What do you want?”

“It looked like you and Y/n were arguing so I wanted to come check on you,” Jisoo said and it only made Taehyung more mad. He huffed, “Well it’s none of your business so you can go.”

“I still care about you Tae,” Jisoo confessed moving even closer to him, “And I don’t like that she’s getting you worked up.”

“Just shut up,” he said with little patience for his ex girlfriend. He wasn’t even thinking about her right now. He was thinking about you. “You can’t care about me after what you did. So if you think I care at all about what you think, you’re dead wrong.”

“I’m sorry,” she began to cry, “I’m so sorry and you have no idea how much I regret doing what I did. I miss you so much and seeing you with Y/n drives me insane. I can’t stand seeing her treat you like this and make you mad.”

“Jisoo, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you I don’t care,” Taehyung said bitterly, “You cheated on me so I don’t care if you miss me or regret it.”

“I’m sorry!” She kept going, “I swear I didn’t mean to. I just, I thought you didn’t love me anymore and I wasn’t thinking. But please, I regret it. I regret it every day and Y/n doesn’t deserve you.”

“She gets everything she wants and she uses people to get what she wants. When she’s done she just throws them away and I don’t want to see that happen to you,” she moved closer to him, almost touching him backing Taehying into the corner of the balcony.

“She’s mean Taehyung. She doesn’t care about anyone but herself and please, please just take me back,” she said. Taehyung scoffed ready to tell her to fuck off when she did the unthinkable. Her lips pressed against his and before he could process what was happening, the door was swinging open.

“Tae—“ he pushed Jisoo away glaring down at her when he caught sight of the open door. There you stood looking anything but happy. “Y/n,” he made a move to go to you, heart racing out of his chest but you were leaving. He was going after you, Jisoo clinging to his shirt, “Wait—“

“Get off me!” He yelled, angry for real this time, “Don’t you get that I don’t want you? I don’t care how you feel. I don’t care what you think and I can’t believe you just did that!”

“Bu—“

“No, just stop. Y/n’s not the problem, you are. You’re a fucking cunt Jisoo,” Taehyung said honestly, “And I love Y/n way more than I’ve ever loved you and you just fucked up my chances at getting her back. I can’t stand you, do you get that? You didn’t deserve me and I’m happy I see that now because you’re an awful person.”

He knows he was being mean but it was just built up frustration toward her that was finally coming out, “And you’re a dirty cheater and I’ll make sure to remind Hoseok of that. Now move.”

He left with that running back into the apartment looking for you.

“Where’s Y/n?” He asked Jimin in a rush. Jimin pointed to the front door, “She just left. What’s go—Tae!”

He ran out the door calling out to you, “Y/n!”

You were already on the street as he chased after you. “Just stop Taehyung. You wanna run back to your cheating ex. Just do it. I don’t care.”

“I would never! I love you Y/n,” he said honestly because it was true. How could he not fall head over heels for you since the beginning. You proved every bad thing he’d ever heard about you wrong. Sure you snapped at that girl but he knew it wasn’t like you.

“Oh please,” you scoffed, “You love Jisoo. That’s why you wanted to make her jealous in the first place—“

He pulled you back into him by your arm. Had he really chased after you that quickly? He was out of breath, “I don’t give a fuck about her anymore.”

“Then why keep the act up? Were you just waiting for the moment she apologized? Because she’s a cheater and I don’t care if this relationship wasn’t real between us, I hate cheaters and you just kissed her,” you said referring to what you had walked into. All you had wanted was to apologize but clearly he had other plans that didn’t involve you anymore.

“Let me explai—“

“No,” you said pushing him away, “No. I don’t care. I don’t care about what you have to say. I’m done with you. I don’t need a relationship with you.”

“You don’t mean that,” Taehyung shook his head, “You do care. I know you do. That’s why you’re being mean right now and if you

just let me explain and stop a—“

“No! No! No! I’m being mean because I can be and if you don’t like it you can leave. I did this because I was bored and you were easy to make my new toy,” you said viciously, “So don’t act surprised that I don’t want to deal with you anymore. Go back to Jisoo and leave me the fuck alone.”

He wanted to act like your words didn’t sting a little but you were being cruel. If you hadn’t walked in at that moment. If you would’ve just seen him push her away and tell her he loved you.

“You don’t mean that,” he whispered and you didn’t mean it. You really didn’t but you weren’t going to get hurt er over a guy you weren’t even dating. You just shrugged, “I do. So this fake relationship is don—“

“It stopped being fake to me the second you kissed me on the yacht,” Taehyung confessed, “But I didn’t want you trying to run away from me like you’ve done the last few days. And now you’re using the kiss as an excuse to push me away when we both know I don’t feel shit for Jisoo. I know you know she kissed me. I wouldn’t be here right now if I wanted her.”

“Well I don’t c—“

“Yes you do!” He yelled at you. You two were arguing on the street for anyone to see but he didn’t care about anything but you. He grabbed you by the waist shaking you a little, “You do care so stop acting like you don’t. You can play the mean bitch card with anyone else but not me! I know the real you and I know you care about me too. And I swear to you, that kiss meant nothing to me. It disgusted me.”

You didn’t say anything but he knew he was breaking down your wall so he kept going, “I know how everyone perceived you but I don’t see you that way. I see you as someone who’s been let down a lot and your defense mechanism is getting mad and I don’t want you like that with me,” Taehyung said moving closer to her. You let him pull you into a hug.

“I really care about you and I know this is happening so fast but I couldn’t stop thinking about the night of the dinner,” Taehyung held your face in his hands, “And I want to be with you. Not as pretend but really as my girlfriend.”

“Are you sure you’re not saying this to get back at Jisoo?” You asked with a pout. He shook his head, “Fuck Jisoo and everyone else, it’s just you.”

“Even if I’m mean and spoiled?”

“Especially because of that,” he teased brushing your hair out of your face before kissing the tip of your nose, “I like everything about you and we’ll work on whatever needs to be done because I want to be with you so damn bad.”

“At least we don’t have to tell anyone we’re dating now.”

He smiled, heart melting a little as he tilted your head up and connected your lips with his. You smiled back, “Just so you know. I love you too and I’m really sorry for pushing you away. If I hadn’t gotten mad then Jisoo wouldn’t hav—“

“It’s fine baby, as long as you love me I don’t care about the rest.”

::.

request 1

request 2

wow I wrote this in less than two days ain’t that something

thanks for over 4K followers. luv and appreciate everyone.

I’m convinced Tae is really affectionate and understanding so when he got to know y/n he just fell in love

and I don’t wanna hear anything bad about this y/n bc she skims over her trauma which clearly explains why she acts the way she does 😜

hey siri play daddy issue by the neighbourhood

hey siri play evergreen by Omar Apollo

hey siri play liquid smooth by mitski

[starlight-lesbians]

Me! I'm gonna ask questions about the taco bell au!

What do they do on their off days?

OOH OOH OK

so during the day they’re all students at the local community college, so they see each other a decent amount outside of work already!

Dinah and Pearl are roommates and they’ll take nights off together to have movie nights and go get free taco bell from their partners/crushes

Belle and Tass are similar, they also live together and they’re neighbors w Dinah and Pearl. They have quiet study nights when they have time off together usually. Belle likes experimenting with different tea blends at work to find which one puts them to sleep the fastest after studying

Dinah and Greaseball super rarely get days off together since they’re like the de facto shift leads at their respective shops, but when they do, they’ll normally go out to a bar or something rather than stay home. I get the vibe they’re both pretty into parties

When Dinah has nights off to herself she makes herself margs and does her homework (cooking, she’s a culinary major) at literal lightning speed while listening to Kesha

Greaseball’s solo nights off are normally spent at sports practice or the gym, she’s a tryhard(/affectionate)

Pearl’s time off is mostly just studying at the Taco Bell to flirt with Rusty or the coffee shop to flirt with Electra (she’s an adorable menace, neither of them can focus on work)

Electra avoids everyone but Pearl and Rusty when they have time off, they’re like a ghost lmao. (They’re at the library working on electrical engineering homework or something)

Lumber and Porter literally always take their days off together bc they’re attached at the hip, they’re usually at the skate park

Hydra spends his days off getting high and annoying Tass at the coffee shop if he’s working

Slick does essentially the same thing except she’s bothering Belle and drinking way too much caffeine (she’s like two weeks behind on her schoolwork)

Belle just goes to bed early on her nights off, nuff said

Tass hangs out in the library quiet floor and reads usually

Rusty probably hangs out in the cafe most nights, partly on account of Electra and Pearl but also because Momma is there

[scaly-freaks]

If you had to write a sequel after TGOWARL with amaras son as the main character, how would you go on abt it? Who would be his love interest, how would his relationship with his parents look like, would you even keep amara and aegon alive or would you do something tragic abt them, and most importantly: WOULD HE BE A HOT VAMPIRE?!

Took me an embarrassing few seconds to figure out what TGOWARL was *-*

Tbh I wouldn't write a sequel as it would basically be an OC novel so I just don't feel the point of writing that in the ASOIAF verse. Not against discussing it though.

But also hmmmm...so in Burning Jasmine, Valerion was one of the most batshit Targaryens possible. The only way he could be more batshit in this version is if he was preying on his own sister, which Jaehaerys already will grow up to do. There are plot points I can't betray currently, so the relationship with his parents can't be fully unfurled, however, he isn't Aegon's favourite by any means, I will say that. He reminds Aegon of Aemond, but he also comes off more "Uller" than Targaryen because of the black hair (which does have a white mallen streak).

Amara's parental situation..........is not as perfect as it seems, which will be explored in the next chapter, and it's kind of the reason why she herself isn't the best parent in this fic as compared to Burning Jasmine. She gets overwhelmed easily, or becomes "friends" with her kids which isn't the correct way to discipline them. Aegon on the other hand is always the disciplinarian and not a friend, but only because he wants to exert control over his children the way he knows Viserys didn't over him (he probably fears children like himself to rebel against him).

Aegon's parenting throws everything more into imbalance than Amara's though, because she at least tries to give them all love equally even when depression hits and she just wants to pretend she doesn't have kids and retreats into herself (parenting is a 24/7 job and not everyone is ready for it).

But Aegon favours Jaehaera heavily. The topic of spousification of a child is a difficult one, but it happens all the time. And I think if Amara died or just withdrew emotionally from Aegon, he would spousify Jaehaera (who will grow up to have mental health/behavioural issues of her own which can get very violent, but with her dad, she's always sweet). Theres quite a fair bit of Electra complex with Jaehaera when she's in her teenage years, so it's something that travels both ways and gets unhealthy, especially when their attachment as father-daughter starts to alienate his sons (especially Jaehaerys, who only ever had Aegon once his mother died).

Jaehaerys's obsession with Jaehaera stems from the basic element of she has everything I want, she is everything I want. She has Amara who is his pseudo-mother figure, she has Aegon who is his father, she has the love of everyone who sees her because she's the Targaryen princess who was legitimised and hatched her egg before she was even born. Half of it is Jaehaerys wanting to cut off her skin and wear it, and the other half is obviously sexual/emotional/mental (I need you to need me so I can convince myself I'm worth something - but if you don't do it the way I want, I hurt you).

Compared to his two older siblings, Valerion is relatively ignored. Which obviously mean he develops a personality all by himself, explores the world himself, learns how to regulate his emotions on his own. In that sense he's sort of like Aegon aka visiting brothels young because a friend suggested it. Hanging out with a group outside his family all the time and learning how to be a man from them (with disastrous results). He would also go for the biggest dragon over keeping the egg he was given as a babe (which would never hatch). He probably wouldn't want Vermithor for this personal belief that because the dragon hasn't seen heavy war, he's "useless." He'd want a dragon like Cannibal, simply because he enjoys the thought of the beast hunting out his siblings' mounts for sport. He's sadistic to a fault, and if he ever became king, he'd make Maegor look like a fun time in the park.

p.s. I don't understand the vampire question 😭

[gotham-native]

@lightingelectratwo

sorry this took so long my brain wasn't working

ELECTRA

ahh Electra

for her design it's a mix of 1998 and the Broadway revival designs

OK SOOOO

She is Bombalurina and Macavitys daughter

I go back and forth on her having powers, I definitely think Jemima does, but unlike Jemima's i think Electra's powers is more external then internal, like maybe teleporting and shapeshifting??

Shes older then Jemima by either a few months or a year at most

Shes a mamas girl and was basically attached to Bomba when she was little

She give 'creepy little girl' vibes

i think she likes dancing and her number 1 dance partner is Etcetera

she's a surprisingly good hunter

I think she's quiet but not shy she just doesn't like to talk a lot

As a ADD girly i think she's a ADD girly, i don't know why it's just vibes

She really looks up to misto and thinks he so cool

When she grows up i think she becomes a tribe protector like here mama

I'm sorry this is so shit, i swear i have more thoughts about her i just don't know how to write them down 😭😭

[flame-x]

A list of named swings and such

So. I know one of these already exists. BUT. I'm doing another. because i can

Old London Swings (pre-Revival, mostly late 80s and the 90s) Greycat/Hysperia/NBQ (nameless brown queen)- Greycat was sometimes known as NBQ, it depended on her costume, which ranged from grey to tan. Hysperia is a different cat who has sometimes been called NBQ by fans even though she isn't Greycat/NBQ AJ- "Almost Jemima". Female kitten Tabbygirl- more mature queen (usually covered adult roles) Patches- male kitten, often resembles Admetus Calico- male or female Caramel- male, looks very similar to Victor Victor- originated here but used in productions worldwide

Post-revival London Swings Electra (also Lightning Ellectra) George Pouncival Victor

Early Broadway Swings (80s and 90s) Spike- young male George- young male AJ- young female Greycat- female Carbucketty- male kitten, later cut when Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer became actual cats and not trash puppets Babygriz's design was also used as a swing

US Tour Swing Spike- different design. male.

China 2012 Grumbuskin Jemima Oliva Murad Quaxo Noilly Prat Latter four have since been used in other productions

Gothenburg 2006 Isis Ramses Garbo Shakespeare Tintomara Agustus Moses Savannah

Warsaw 2004 Fraszka Fantasia Sierściuch Zyleta/Kocik Le Miau Angelika Mamrotka Turbo Ptys Menello Bianco Kara Kotek

Tecklenburg 2015 Rocketta Eris Barnaby Buttons Bonzo Mab

Thunerseespiele 2017 Ishtar Luna Roxy

2009 Italian Tour Caligola Paride

Helsinki 1986 Aprilli Gilbert Lilli Marina Meijuli Grumbuskin/Rokkonen Russu Sibylla

Oslo 1985 Kvesesta Potefar Godnattakatt

The Named Swings Some of these are full ensemble characters in certain productions but when other productions cut that character or use an alternative, that name is often used for a swing. Admetus- when he's replaced by Plato, Admetus is sometimes used by a male/female swing Augustus Autumn Bill Bailey Carbucketty Electra Etcetera Exotica- first used to create a cameo for Femi Taylor (who played Tantomile in the OLC I'm pretty sure) in the 1998 film but has since been used for swings in large productions George- male kitten Jemima- female kitten Jonathan- male Murad- young male Noilly Prat- young female Olivia- young female Peter Quaxo- young male Victor- kind of an elderly male? his performer usually covers the older roles like Gus and Old Deuteronomy There's also a swing Babygriz in the current UK Tour

And now the mindfuck that is alternatives: Bill Bailey/Tumblebrutus- Bill Bailey originated in the original London production. Tumblebrutus was used instead of him on Broadway and in the 1998 film (the latter to maintain international something or other). In the 98 film it was Bill Bailey under the name Tumblebrutus. Carbucketty/Pouncival- Carbucketty originated in the original London production. As with Bill Bailey/Tumblebrutus, Pouncival was used instead of his London counterpart on Broadway and in the 1998 film. In the 98 film it was Carbucketty under the name Pouncival. Pouncival/George- the 2014 London Palladium production included a third male kitten aside from Carbucketty and Bil Bailey named Pouncival, who's design was actually much closer to the original London George character than to Carbucketty.

Quaxo/Mistoffelees- Big mindfuck! In UK-style productions, the performer is credited as Quaxo up until his song, where he is revealed to be The Magical Mr. Mistoffelees. This is usually explained as Mr. Mistoffelees being Quaxo's stage name. However, in some productions they're completely different cats, with Quaxo using a totally different design. Also, as Quaxo/Misto used to dance a tap dance duel against Jennyanydots while dressed as the lead beetle. Because of this, all pre-revival London productions attached the name Quaxo to the lead tap dancing beetle regardles of whether or not it was played by Mistoffelees. Plato/Admetus- Even bigger mindfuck! Admetus was the original double for Macavity in London and I think London-based prodctions still use Admetus. Plato is the Broadway version of the same cat. The Plato you see in the 1998 film is the Admetus design. Plato's design originally had a lot of brown and grey but since the 98 film, which used the Admetus design, you get a lot of "Admetus costume and makeup but named Plato". In productions where Plato is the Macavity double, the name Admetus is sometimes used for a swing (this is common in Australian-style productions) Admetus/George- This one is purely to do with the 98 film. Frank Thompson was credited with playing the Rumpus Cat and Admetus. Fans assumed the cat who was actually using the George design was Admetus, but it is unknown if the renaling of the George design to Admetus was intentional or not. Jemima/Sillabub- Jemima originated from the original London production but was renamed Sillabub in the US and in US-based prosuctions to avoid any negative racial connotations. Since then, the name Sillabub is used more often outside of Europe, though in productions where Sillabub is used as the principle version, the name Jemima is sometimes used for a female swing. Jemima is a named swing in the China 2012 and Shiki productions.

Other names There are two names in Old Possum's that haven't been used in any production (that I know of): James and Cat Morgan. Then there's Socrates, who is exclusive to the 2019 film.

So! That's that! Wow this got long and kinda detailed. If you've any questions/additions/whatever, send them in an ask and I'll do my best to answer.

There are many, many, more unnamed swings, but this is a compiled list of named swings.

I got the majority of my information from the wiki and also from this post by @/theimpossiblescheme.

[soymemes]

ELECTRA HEART

lyrical starters/prompts from marina's album "electra heart" (4/5)

---VALLEY OF THE DOLLS

"Got a hole inside of me."

"Born with a void, hard to destroy with love or hope."

"Built with a heart, broken from the start."

"And now I die slow."

"In my life, I got this far; now I'm ready for the last hoorah."

"Pick a personality for free when you feel like nobody."

"Back to zero, here we go."

"I can feel it coming to the end."

---HYPOCRATES

"You say that love is not that easy."

"I'm sick and tired of all your preaching."

"Who are you to tell me who to be?"

"You're my last bone of contention that could break at any mention."

"You're the last wall that will stand tall 'til the end of the world."

"I know you only want to own me."

"You tell me one thing, and do another."

"You let go of me."

"You played the martyr for so long that you can't do anything wrong."

---HOW TO BE A HEARTBREAKER

"You gotta have fun."

"When you're done, you gotta be the first to run."

"jJst don't get attached to somebody you could lose."

"This is how to be a heartbreaker."

"Boys; they like a little danger."

"We'll get him falling for a stranger, a player."

"I love you, at least I think I do."

"Wear your heart on your cheek but never on your sleeve."

"Gotta be looking pure."

"Kiss him goodbye at the door, and leave him wanting more."

"We don't want our hearts to break in two."

"it's better to be fake."

"Can't risk losing in love again."

----

[shallowseeker]

Some of my fave stuff on attachment theory

It's so interesting how this is becoming popular again. I'm posting this here, because I know some of you are nerds, and I like using tumblr as a bookmarking system for myself.

Anyway, there's been some recent additional imagings and research parameters applied to this framework. They expand the construct: exploring the perception of self, perception of others that I quite liked!

I just really, really like how it makes me think. :-) As with most "personality disorders," and "attachment styles," be forewarned that no person is one-dimensional. (Someday, they'll change personality disorder to something more palatable, mark my words.)

Anyway, often, these styles are not etched in stone so much as conceptual frameworks for how one copes in general, and in the face of life's varied stressors.

Because your level of Resilience changes throughout your life!

It's an up and down, push-pull type of thing. That's why we look for life events and stressors. You might fall into a negative conception of self during a down spell, or in reaction to a trauma. It's always shifting.

///

Another related fave paper that I can't seem find is a long one about how a person may similarly behave to a child and a love object/spouse, but not in a creepy way. It's more of a fundamental, parallel way of relating to the world.

The outline is this: how a person forms an attachment with their child may have similar manifestations in how they attempt to attach to desired romantic partner. Basically, your child becomes "baby" and when you love a spouse, they also, in many important ways, "become baby." I think that some people can't recognize the natural parallels in these different types of love, and appreciate what they have in common without fetishizing Oedipus/Electra.

Anyway, furthermore, I adore how "babyfication" can lead to accidental infantilization of the spouse, especially early on when you get whammied with the need to protect and care and you don't know what to do with it and it's hard to define! It can be a similar panic of STAY WITH ME / STAY SAFE mixed with but wait PROTECT ME / MEET MY NEEDS and it's so unhinged. Ah, human emotions.

Oldie but goodie - http://www.psychology.sunysb.edu/attachment/online/inge_origins.pdf Modern takes https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3330635/

Cultural considerations: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7036989/

[bearpillowmonster]

MCU TV Shows Ranking (That I've Seen)

Because there are just too many now to watch them all, plus, why watch the ones I'm uninterested in?

Anyways, the rules will encapsulate the whole show so all seasons as one, I can't say that I like S1 and disliked S2 and rank it only based on S1. I will also clarify if I think it's worth continuing.

Daredevil- Karen lacks, Foggy's good, Matt's really good, Kingpin's really good. Electra could use some work as well as the Hand. Bullseye is actually marvelous except for the very end but the three seasons make for a nice bundle.

Punisher- It's like comic and Jon Bernthal Punisher are two different things but I like both for different and similar reasons. It plays off of him very nicely and lays the groundwork for a more realistic setting with interesting action. Jigsaw was a compelling villain as well and I found myself liking a few other characters but there were definitely the few that lacked. Both seasons were decent enough. I'd be open to continue.

Hawkeye- Not bad, have some complaints about Kate but overall a good entertaining show. I'd watch a season 2 but I feel like it's not really made for one, they will probably just continue to appear in other stuff.

Falcon & The Winter Soldier - I actually liked it more than I thought I would as I didn't have much interest in the characters but it turns out that I just needed more time with them. Unlike most of the ones on this list, I liked the ending, though it didn't completely knock me over. I think that a lot of what was in this series should've been the basis for everything going forward because of how it treated their livelihoods and asked questions. I'm not sure any of these series matched the hype of the fake Captain America decapitating a guy with the shield. This paved the way for Cap 4 which would've been questionable without this series.

Wandavision - I wasn't hyped for this, I let it slip by my radar because whatever, I never cared for either of them anyway. People complain about it having a main superhero plot but that's what I stayed for, I liked that portion but then I finished it and I completely understand why now. It's not a bad series and has a lot of cool ideas but just a weird way to end things. It got Multiverse of Madness which was mid and Agatha isn't out yet but I'm not hyped for that either, wouldnt be surprised if it fails due to lack of name recognition.

Ms. Marvel- A few of these I like comparing to Disney Channel shows because of how they act and while it all started with this one, I have to admit, it actually gets a lot of the teenager stuff right but I think it throws so much at the wall that it has to get at least some of it so there are a few misses as well. The ending is dumb, her powers are ok but they could be used a lot better and I imagine they will. She was the best part of the Marvels and it's S2 worthy.

Cloak & Dagger - It was an entertaining watch but perhaps not the most enticing. I liked the characters but they were very much put into tv show circumstances so I felt like it was its own thing. I like the actors and characters enough to keep them in the MCU but don't care to see another season, I wasn't all that big on S2 anyway.

She-Hulk - Last place, huh? I actually had the most hype for this one because I was hoping we'd get with She-Hulk what we didn't get with Hulk. In fact, I like her more because I first learned about her in the cartoon and well-

I think a lot of kids couldn't resist THAT. So I grew attached to her and had all these ideas for how she could be introduced and-oh, no not that.

But I still held out hope because I lowered my expectations and just wanted a crumb but the more it went on, the less I liked it and then I learned that it was all by design and I wasn't really sure how to feel about that and then time passed and I was like, that shouldn't matter, it didn't pay off despite a cool ending. I logged all this in other posts. Yet- here I am- an advocate for S2...

[the-firebird69]

1966 Harley Davidson Electra Glide

He says this to me well I say it's on it says yeah with the clones it says no kidding I said they're assassinating the cops and I know about it I knew about before but it's really turned up and then he said I guess we should do something about it he said yeah unless you want to see your wives with your dick and balls inside them without you attached and it means stuff in code and he's saying that he's the wife and it's so weird so getting to it but I said this they're taking us apart and putting us together movie is around like where they're bobbles and ruining the max plan which is to have some sort of Shangri-La in New England for a friend here so we have to get moving it's disgusting and we have to die fighting I don't want to die sitting here farting on our friend

The policeman shown here and I'm retired but from Boston so he says it's still good I remember how to drink beer and do police work that's great

I retired from Boston too and I put the letters on well the jacket and I said actually it fits and I know what to do

Trump

It's pretty spooky but that's how it's going

Bja

I can do it real easy haha and yeah that's me you salted smaller and cut up and he's going to be a big boy what are you going to do with him he says he'll have to go over to Europe and you'll be the same people and the same heights that's great

John Gallagher

Actually pretty mad at you that redheaded guy that was beheading us and it looks like Trump and we checks and it was and you don't get away with that either and you're not our friend or his and he says it and you don't get it you will it's so sick of your s*** you can't be head someone and expect something and you're doing that with this life foundation cryogenics companies so we're going after you for it and I'm organizing now I'm sick of being mutilated people saying we do what we want and all this crap

Jenna

Yeah general grievous f*** off don't get shot as a cop cuz they all are LOL

Zues it's funny I want to be in the same comment but here I am yeah don't get shot as a cop you piece of crap Trump Hera

I'm going to kill you for what you're having to say nobody has to say that s*** you piece of s*** Trump

Olympus

He's a good guy for 10 seconds no you're not the good guy you're down there for nefarious purposes and nobody wants your ass or your idiots in the ship ever again because of what you did last time and yeah that's what they've been saying to you but you're deaf cuz you're too busy talking you little chatterbox

Zues Hera

[clementinatehasperdido]

My 2023 in books. Part III

July

The Silence of The Girls- Pat Barker⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 5/5

Great retelling. It gives women a voice. I enjoyed it a lot. Barker makes a compelling story. It destroyed me at times. Injustice will always move me. Briseis's narration is beautiful but at the same time I find it sad. It takes the idea of ​​pyrrhic victory to another level, showing you a bitter Achilles consumed by his misery.

“because grief’s only ever as deep as the love it’s replaced.”

Red White and Royal Blue -Casey McQuiston ⭐⭐⭐⭐4/5 

It is a rereading. I read it when it came out. I loved it at the time and enjoyed it again. I will always love little silly romance novels. Always. I know that McQuiston wrote a love story from two privileged characters, it is still a beautiful story. I feel particularly attached to this story because it makes me feel like everything I read could be real to me, in a very Hallmark way hahaha. *I'm just a girl ok?*

“I thought, this is the most incredible thing I have ever seen, and I had better keep it a safe distance away from me. I thought, if someone like that ever loved me, it would set me on fire.” 

Fourth Wing-Rebecca Yarros  ⭐ 1/5

Just no. I did not like. I should give it 0 stars. I have nothing else to say.

Only Dull People Are Brilliant at Breakfast - Oscar Wilde  ⭐⭐⭐ 3/5

So sassy. I definitely think Oscar Wilde would have been famous on Twitter haha. Joking aside, it is a good way to read Wilde if you have never read him before because, behind how funny or incisive he can be he hides truths and reflections that become constructive.

“Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else’s opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation.”

The Book of Form and Emptiness - Ruth Ozeki  ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 5/5 

When I tell you that I devoured this book, it's not a lie. It is written with dedication and beauty. It is philosophical but does not abandon the narrative. It's about how we fill the voids left by grief, the pain that it entails. One of the books that impacted me the most this year. Sometimes it feels like the text is about everything and nothing at the same time.

“Things are needy. They take up space. They want attention, and they will drive you mad if you let them.”

“Space and time were hopelessly entangled, and the present moment was growing increasingly remote.”

August

White Teeth - Zadie Smith ⭐⭐⭐ 3/5

I enjoy Zadie Smith's writing, I think she has a lot to say. She's intelligent, she's political, she's suspicious. White Teeth is a novel that brings the themes of migration, racism, cultural identity and patriarchy to the fore. I wanted to enjoy this book more. Yes, I have to admit that I stayed reading because many of the dialogues are good and catch you.

“You must live life with the full knowledge that your actions will remain. We are creatures of consequence.”

Sea of Tranquility- Emily St. John Mandel ⭐⭐⭐⭐4/5

Another book by Emily St. John Mandel that I liked. It is the most complex Mandel book I have read so far. With the incorporation of time travel, the narrative ties together parts of life. I find this quite beautiful. This book is more than time travel. They are stories connected to stories across centuries of humanity.

“Won’t most of us die in fairly anticlimactic ways, our passing unremarked by almost everyone, our deaths becoming plot points in the narratives of the people around us?” 

September

The Penelopiad - Margaret Atwood ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 5/5

I love Margaret Atwood. This book made me cry ugly tears. The story of the Iliad through the eyes of Penelope and her 12 hanging maids. It is a story that is at times crude and at other times compassionate.

“Happy endings are best achieved by keeping the right doors locked”

An Orestia - Translation by Anne Carson. - Agamemnon by Aiskhylos; Electra by Sophocles; Orestes by Euripides   ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 5/5 

The translations by Anne Carson and Anne Carson in general have been my obsession this year. Honestly, she was born to be the translator of Greco-Latin classics. Orestes will always have a special place in my heart, it is one of the classic works that I like the most. But Electra takes second place. I really liked this translation, I feel like I can quote it in my dreams. I love you Anne Carson.

“Even imaginary demons can drive you into despair.”

The Hunger Games The Trilogy. - Suzanne Collins ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ 5/5  

Let's make this easy. I'm going to talk about the entire trilogy. Every year I read it, don't @ me. I have no chill about it. I always find new things about the trilogy. Sometimes teenage things become outdated because I'm no longer at that stage. But the structure endures. Collins did a magnificent job. Catching Fire is my favorite book of the three. And I did read the three books back to back, there is no other way to do it.

“Sometimes things happen to people and they're not equipped to deal with them.”

“What I need is the dandelion in the spring. The bright yellow that means rebirth instead of destruction. The promise that life can go on, no matter how bad our losses. That it can be good again.”

[thestarlightforge]

Sending an ask because then I'll get more space to YELL ABOUT HACKS!!!!!!!!!

Why did the firing scene make you cry? Well, that's probably due to 1) the acting, and 2) the writing. The acting is pretty simple in terms of why it's good. Jean and Hannah have a natural chemistry and they're very close IRL, so Hannah bringing the tears and Jean smiling wanly is just ~them~ being attached to each other and that energy transferring to the screen. The writing, on the other hand, is quite phenomenal. The script for that episode is here. But it's more than just 208 that's been written extremely well. The whole arc of both Ava and Deb throughout both seasons takes us and them through a series of extreme highs and heavy lows and general 'getting to know you' phases of friendships/relationships (whichever is your preference--I personally don't ship them and I'm the only person I know of who doesn't). We're learning about Ava and Deb as they're learning about each other, so we're getting attached to them too. We see the lost innocence in both of their stories and the trust they come to have in each other, I would argue equally so though most people consider Deb as having more trust in Ava because of her status and lengthy career. That makes sense when you look at it from that angle specifically, but they're both instilling a fuck load of trust in each other. Ava basically makes Deb her entire life for the better part of a year and doesn't question it. She trusts Deb to take care of her even though she's suing her. In the end, Deb drops the suit--as she was always going to do because she cares about Ava too much to actually fuck up her life. The suit was more of a playful nagging if anything. A very expensive playful nagging, but nothing more than a backhanded promise to keep Ava close by any and all means necessary.

SOOOO when Deb drops that bomb on the balcony and insists that Ava leave, we the audience are thrown the same question of 'why?' Why 'keep her close keep her close keep her close' and then '*poof* be gone!'???? Ava makes an excellent point of Deb doing this because she's afraid. She is. She's extremely afraid because she's also in the midst of healing and doesn't know it. She doesn't know what that cluster of emotions is and she doesn't know what to do with it, so she turns the person who's brought it into her life away in the hopes of getting rid of it. Deb will find out things don't work that way, and she'll want Ava back in her life to help her figure her shit out beeecause she trusts her.

As for why Ava cries and then watches the QVC segment to see Deb again, and is genuinely upset she isn't being sued anymore, my theory is Ava's been shown kindness, support, trust and love by a woman who isn't her peer for the first time and doesn't want that to end. There's an Electra complex argument to be made there, of fucking course, but I think it goes far deeper than any type of attraction, Freudian or otherwise. (I make that argument in Ch 5 of my fic, actually. No pressure to read it.) Looking at all the shit talking/over-reacting Nina does, it's easy to see why Deb showing Ava sympathy when she's scattering Dennis' ashes at the Grand Canyon, telling Ava she's too good to stop writing, giving Ava credit on her special and so forth are things Ava wants to continue to see come her way. Ava is one bad script away from Nina having to euthanize Mr. Creampie, and she knows this. Deb has been her savior in a lot of ways, and having to be on her own is scary because existing as a person was so much easier when she was with Deb; she had a fellow lonely soul to talk to and laugh with. (I make that argument in Ch 20. Btw, I posted that entire fic before S2 was promoted, so the look Ava gives Deb after she makes the joke land in 206? I predicted that.)

There's a human connection made between the two of them, and then it's broken. And since we've gotten to know them as a duo and individually, we see how much better they are for having been in each other's lives for a short while, and we know they could be even more positively influenced if they remained. When they're broken up, we mourn what could have/should have/would have been. Maybe we see a parallel in our own lives. Maybe we mourn an absence of that type of kinship. Maybe we have hope for reconciliation or maybe we accept their ending, but either way it's left a mark on us. That's not how things should end. Things shouldn't be ambiguous. We as humans have a primal need for closure, and Ava and Deb didn't get closure. Ava searches for answers in Deb's face, Deb goes back to life on autopilot like Ava was never there at all, and we're left wondering why. It's very gray. Very open-ended. And that's torture to the human psyche.

So we cry! Because it's sad! It's fucking sad!!! And that's okay. <3

I'm not ashamed to tell you I bawled like a grieving mother when 'Goodbye Stranger' started playing. I have my reaction on tape. JPL saw it, too! (a mild fuck you to all three of them for making me cry)

Just want to share this ask because so many great points were made. You’re totally right, ofc. Phenomenal acting, phenomenal writing, great growth for both characters. And I’m so, so excited to check out the script!

[primadonna-veins]

Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?

What emotion is the hardest for your OC to process? How about express?

-tommy

I associate Ivanka with like 90% of the songs in the Electra Heart album by Marina and the Diamonds, but specifically a line from Primadonna Girl (which is what the url for this blog was named after). The quote is "You say that I'm kinda difficult, but it's always someone else's fault."

Ivanka is very bad at processing grief, since she's so self-centered that getting attached to people is uncomfortable, and losing those few people is incomprehensible to her.

She's even worse at expressing real, unadulterated glee. Instead of just smiling or flapping her hands a little like a normal person, Ivanka will throw big and reckless parties to celebrate whatever's pleased her this time.

[the-bafflement-of-scotland-yard]

you know what. this time, I'M the one demanding spagratti. give it to me. this is a threat <3

I am not intimidated, I’ll just give you spagratti because I want to give you spagratti

————————————————————

“Can’t you just give it up?” Electra whined, dramatically draping themself over their partner.

“Nope” A.V. said simply, unperturbed by the amount of noodly limbs suddenly dangling in his view as he continued working on the piece of equipment in front of him.

“But you’ve been at it for hours” Electra sighed.

“You don’t normally complain about that, darling” the caboose said, smirking.

“I do when you’re screwing some stupid radio instead of me” Electra bristled. “Come ooonnnn, it’s way past dusk, just put it away.”

A.V. just chuckled, never taking his gaze away from the electronical mess. “I vividly recall you turning me down because Volta was busy fluffing your hair. So now you can’t exactly complain that I found something else to do in the meantime.”

“I can and I will” Electra pouted. They hopefully sat up straight when A.V. put down his screwdriver, but leant back down on him when he just grabbed a smaller one instead.

“You know, it would go a lot faster if I wouldn’t have to deal with floppy limbs and a whiny partner” A.V. remarked, taking out a transistor. “I’m trying to use my tools over here.”

“It would go even more quickly if you would just let it rest” Electra countered. “What even is the importance of this, why do you need to damage that poor radio of yours even further?”

A.V. sighed. “I told you. Control equipped the diesels with some new tech, and if I manage to improve my transmitter I could break into their frequency and wreak havoc.”

Electra didn’t reply, just leaning even more heavily on him.

The caboose shoved them so they didn’t block his workspace. “Come on, you like confusing those idiots as much as I do.”

“Well, yeah, but…” Electra spluttered.

“Don’t you want me to mess with Greaseball?” A.V. went over him.

Electra grabbed his stool and quickly turned him around, wrapping their long legs around his waist before he could protest. “Right now I just want you inside me, okay.”

A.V. remained silent, but the colour rising in his cheeks and the way he squirmed in their hold was enough.

Electra smirked triumphantly. “Oh sorry, did I… activate your tool?” they asked innocently, hands moving towards his belt.

“God damn it” A.V. grumbled, his voice rather husky. “Fine. You take off your clothes while I finish attaching this transistor.”

“Or” Electra purred, kissing his neck, hands sliding under his shirt, “you finish it tomorrow.”

“Or I’ll finish it tomorrow” A.V. repeated, throwing the screwdriver away.

[lokifantasies]

Desires (Loki/Jade) FLUFF

Jade confesses her problem to Loki.

Read the first part here!

Read the Mischievous Life series here!

This is the last part that will mention the Electra complex.

Jade and her friends are on their respective laptops – doing whatever teenage girls do, but instead of browsing Pinterest, Twitter, or Tumblr, Jade is researching the feelings that she was forced to finally acknowledge the night before. It took her a while, but she finally fell asleep cuddled up to Claudia, but Jade wants to understand herself more than anything. She's so deep into her research that she doesn't notice when Loki comes up behind her – greeting her with a good morning and causing her to jump.

"Everything alright?" Loki asks with a raised eyebrow – suspicious as Jade quickly slams her laptop closed.

"Yep...uh-huh...perfect...thanks," Jade stutters.

Loki is unconvinced, and he reaches his hand towards her laptop – only to be stopped when Jade harshly slaps his hand away.

Loki pulls out a chair and sits across from his teenage daughter. "Sweetheart, what's going on? Did everything go okay last night?"

Jade sighs and slumps in her chair. "Yeah – everything went just fine," she tells him, then pushes her laptop towards him. "But I realized something."

Loki looks down at her laptop and back up to Jade. "What do you mean?"

"Just open it," she relents – realizing that hiding her problems isn't going to help.

Cautiously, Loki opens the MacBook, and he begins to read the research article before his eyes.

Inaccurate Representation of the Electra Complex in Psychology Textbooks

"A daughter develops a specific liking for the father, with a corresponding jealous attitude toward the mother," Loki mutters to himself before looking over at Jade, who by now is crying to herself.

"It's called an Electra complex," she says softly. "It's based on some old mythological story about...,"

"Yes, the murder of Agamemnon," Loki confirms. "Electra was his daughter – she hated her mother for murdering her father." He closes the MacBook and slides it back to Jade. "What are you trying to say, Jade?"

The teenager shrugs and chews at her fingernails. "I dunno," she whispers and sniffs away any stray tears. "Don't you think I'm a little...attached to you?"

Loki sighs and crosses his arms over his chest. "No," he answers honestly. "I think we're best friends – we always have been – but you're not attached to me. Why would you think you have an Electra complex?"

Jade looks around to see her friends still in the living room doing whatever they're doing before turning to face her dad. "I realized last night...that if you weren't my dad...then...I'd be...you know...attracted to...to you," she whispers.

Loki gives his daughter a warm smile and wipes away the tears that forced themselves out of her blue eyes. "Sweetheart, that's not...that's called having a type," he tells her. "It's the example of how a man should be that I set for you...the characteristics that you find "attractive" in me are the same exact ones you look for in another person," Loki secretly points to Claudia. "Take Claudia, for example," he smiles. "What do you love about her?"

Jade takes a quick glance towards her girlfriend. "Everything," she chuckles. "She's...gorgeous, protective, funny, outgoing, mischievous, tough...," she begins to list before being cut off by Loki.

"And what is it about me that you are drawn to?" he asks – determined to prove his point.

Jade shrugs. "You're...I guess you're handsome, protective, funny, nice, the actual God of Mischief, tough, loving, and the best dad I could have ever asked for."

"Do you see the similarities there?" Loki smugly grins.

"I do," Jade quietly admits. "But then...why do I sometimes feel jealous of mom?"

Loki smirks and reaches for his fourteen-year-old's hand. "You've only had one lover...Claudia...maybe you need to let yourself have some more experiences."

Jade laughs. "You're telling me to go sleep around with guys?"

"No," Loki quickly denies. "Absolutely not. I'm only suggesting that you keep your heart open. Maybe before, Claudia was the perfect person to fulfill your desires, but if she's not anymore, that's perfectly fine...perhaps you can find what you desire in someone else." Loki gets up from his chair and walks out of the kitchen – stopping behind Jade before exiting and wrapping his arms around her shoulders in a tight hug. "My love, don't ever feel ashamed of the things you desire...they're there for a reason, and so long as you're not harming anyone...do what you can to satisfy those desires...and if that means I have to suck it up and deal with you having a boyfriend, then that's what I'll have to do." Loki chuckles and places a kiss on Jade's cheek. Never failing – a smile appears on her face as her dad walks away.

Taglist (let me know if you want to be added!)

@radicallyred @holdmytesseract @vicmc624 @mm2305 @nms224 @clockblobber @missdforever @winchestersgirl222 @sallymagnoliaposts

[perspectivestarters]

Perspective's Sentence Starters; Electra Heart (Part III)

RADIOACTIVE

"Lying on a fake beach, you'll never get a tan."

"Baby, I'm gonna leave you drowning until you reach for my hand."

"In the night your heart is full and by the morning empty."

"I'm the one who left you, you're not the one who left me."

"When you’re around me, I’m radioactive."

"My heart is nuclear."

"Love is all that I fear."

"Waiting for the nightfall for my heart to light up."

"Baby, I want you to die for my love."

"Ready to be let down."

"I’m heading for a meltdown."

"Tonight I feel like neon gold."

"I take one look at you and I grow cold."

SEX YEAH

"Everyone's seen everything."

"Question what the TV tells you."

"Question what a pop star sells you."

"Question mom and question dad."

"Question good and question bad."

"All my life I've tried to fight what history has given me."

"Been there, done that, got the t-shirt."

"Sold my soul, and yeah, the truth hurt."

"All my life I've felt it deep inside of me."

"All this time was fighting for what I believe."

LONELY HEARTS CLUB

"Laugh track on a TV show echoes in the dark alone."

"I go to bed feeling bad that I’m the reason that you’re sad."

"Do you wanna be a member?"

"Do you want to be with somebody like me?"

"I feel like if I’m too kind then you will only change your mind."

"Take advantage of my heart and I’ll go back into the dark."

"Love will never be forever."

"Feelings are just like the weather."

BUY THE STARS

"I’m not yours to keep."

"The stars are free."

"We don’t own our heavens now, we only own our hell."

"If you don’t know that by now, then you don’t know me that well."

"All my life I’ve been so lonely."

"You’d like to think you know me."

"It wouldn’t change who you are."

"You’re still living life in the dark."

"It’s just who you are."

"The light inside you died."

"You know only how to own me."

"You're buying stars to shut out the light."

"We come alone and alone we die."

"No matter how hard you try, I'll always belong in the sky."

HOW TO BE A HEARTBREAKER

"Rule number one is that you gotta have fun."

"When you're done, you gotta be the first to run."

"Just don't get attached to somebody you could lose."

"This is how to be a heartbreaker."

"Boys they like a little danger."

"We'll get him falling for a stranger, a player."

"At least I think I do!"

"Wear your heart on your cheek, but never on your sleeve."

"Gotta be looking pure."

"Kiss him goodbye at the door, and leave him wanting more."

"Girls, we do, whatever it will take."

"We don't want our hearts to break, in two."

"It's better to be fake."

"Can't risk losing in love again, babe."