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#and I could absolutely see my partner and I saying similar things
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E.L. James terrifies me. My mother thinks fifty shades is a beautiful love story (I might’ve already said that, but this is a cry for help). You are so brave for reading that godforsaken series. Please cleanse your mind soon
Did. Did your mother and I read the same series WHERE did she get that from. They meet, are immediately horny for each other (fair enough, if not my thing), and then spend a month and a half fighting, fucking, and fighting some more. And then they get married (yeah, month and a half. christian literally tells her they can get to know each other after they get married.) and guess what? they proceed to be married and fight. and fuck. and fight some more
Christian's way of "talking" things through when they have a problem is to say "I hate arguing with you" and to have sex. He says "let's not fight" and just wants them to move on without addressing it because he doesn't want to argue! I don't think they've once had a disagreement and talked it through like civil adults they're always yelling. And Christian's inner monologue is "i gotta seduce her. I gotta get her in bed. that way I'll know we're okay". and maybe this is just me but I feel like, perhaps, you should have at least one other measure of being okay
he's got this "need" to be in control and obeyed. and he is! so irrational about it! he literally canceled a meeting in DC and flew back from NYC to Seattle on his private jet once because Ana decided to go out for a drink with a friend instead of back to the apartment like she originally promised (there was a dangerous individual at large, but she had multiple security personnel with her at the time). he canceled his meetings and drove to her work to confront her in person because she wanted to keep her last name at work once. and he also literally bought the company where she worked when she got hired. i'm not even scratching the SURFACE of how annoyingly overbearing and invasive he is. he didn't speak to her for like a whole day when she said she wouldn't promise to obey him in their wedding vows
Ana promises never to leave Christian no matter what on multiple occasions and I'm. I think you should have a stipulation bbg. I think there should be a point at which you do walk out. Eternal devotion no matter what is not romantic or healthy, he can do things that are too much. You walked out on him once please keep that mindset
Oh my god. I was about to look up EL James' stance on queerness (because there's some questionable things in the books) and apparently in 2019 she teased that she might write a queer bdsm novel...I am so afraid.
Anyway. your mother needs to raise her standards, nonsie. and thank you, I fully intend to reset my brain as best as I can as soon as possible--fortunately, reading other books through this has lessened the blow a little :)
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forgeofthenine · 10 months
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Omg in the last few posts you were talking about heat as in temperature but my brain registered it as something COMPLETELY different and it got me thinking…
What if tieflings had some kind of a heat cycle and they get extra sensitive and desperate because of it?? I can imagine Zevlor and Rolan being super embarrassed or nervous to bring it up, maybe Dammon’s more chill about it but still extra needy
So, this has absolutely been a passing thought in my mind and as soon as this request came in I knew I just had to push it to the front of my request queue, purely for my own mental health lol
Gotta admit, I'm a fan of omegaverse dynamics and I actually looked a little into irl animal biology and mating behaviour to get a better feel for what I think tieflings would be the most like. So this has both general headcanons and some NSFW headcanons for the individual bachelors
You probably didn't expect quite this much (over a thousand words of tief content) when requesting but this had me in a chokehold, I hope everyone enjoys <3
TW: NSFW under the cut, very heavy breeding kink, overstimulation, alpha/omega adjacent dynamics
Tiefling NSFW heat and rut headcanons
General
So, I feel like once all tiefs reach sexual maturity they'll start to either have heats or ruts, depending on their biology
Anyone with female biology will have a heat, and I feel like they'd have heats similar to cats but with a slightly longer time between heats
So generally they'd have a heat every two to three months or so unless they're pregnant or have other health issues
For the ones with male biology they'd definitely have a rut
They'd follow similar patterns to the women, but it's not unusual for some tieflings to have longer stretches between their ruts if they don't have a partner
A single tiefling that isn't particularly sexually active might only go into rut once or twice a year
I do think a male tiefling could prematurely go into rut if exposed to a females heat, and couples that have been together for a while will sync up
They have pretty typical heat and rut behaviours with nesting, possessiveness, and a pretty undeniable breeding kink
Nesting, possessiveness, and general mood shifts tend to start setting in during pre-heats and pre-ruts
Pre-heats and pre-ruts can last two to five days, and a full heat and rut can last anywhere from two days to a full week depending on the individual
In saying that, having a partner can definitely shorten both heats and ruts, so single tieflings working through things by themselves will have longer heats or ruts
Heats and ruts can also become more painful the longer they go on without the relief of a sexual partner
Tieflings can tell when others are in heat and rut mostly through pheromones, but a female tieflings tail will also involuntarily lift when she's in pre-heat/heat and around a male
I wonder if I should go so far as to headcanon that they have knots, I did already give them all ridged dicks
Dammon
If you and Dammon aren't dating then he'll be much more shy about his ruts
He basically disappears from his forge and the public for a few days and then comes back as if nothing happened
Once you start dating him is when you find out why he pulls the disappearing act
Dammon is actually very open about it now you're both together and have already been intimate
Blushes slightly while trying to explain some of the more physical, primal aspects
Would flush even more if you tell him you find the whole thing incredibly attractive
The next time he has his rut, you're the only person allowed to see him, and he really is a sight
Naked and tangled in his sheets, all flushed and tense, undeniably hard as he palms himself while looking over at you
Even the way he strips you of your clothing is different, he just about rips it off you as he kisses and nips down your neck and chest
While Dammon is usually one to take his time with making you feel good when he's in rut the only thing on his mind is getting to cum
Though even in his hazy mind frame he still makes sure you're comfortable the whole time
Even a near sex crazed and highly hormonal Dammon is still a very caring partner
You know he's going to bend you in half as he fucks you, he just loves how good you look underneath him like that
Breeding kink go brrrr
This man always fucks like he's trying to breed you but it's off the charts when he's in rut
I hope you're ready to be fucked within an inch of your life because his refractory period ceases to exist
Absolutely watches as he pulls out of you and some of him cum leaks out because he's stuffed you so full
Dammon praises you so well too, you can not shut up this man and his dirty talk
"That's it gorgeous, you take my cock so well."
"You gonna make me a daddy, darling? 'm gonna knock you up, full you up with my cum."
Once his rut dies down enough, he'll scoop you up for a bath
There is no way you could stand after the way this man just wrecked you-
Dammon takes very good care of you, and then you do it all again the next day
Zevlor
Whether you're dating Zevlor or not, he's your personal wealth of knowledge on everything tiefling
So what do you do when a book you read mentions 'the times of year and conditions unique to tieflings' and doesn't explain it?
You go and find your favourite paladin
Zevlor is so embarrassed, dating or not, explaining to you how tiefling heats and ruts work
Can't even keep his eyes on you
When you two are dating and you realise you didn't see him at all yesterday, it's time to go hunting for the man
You have an idea of what might be going on but nothing prepares you for what you find
Much like Dammon, you find him tangled in his bed sheets desperately trying to get himself off
He lets out the sexiest groan when he sees you standing there
He's the gentlest of the three while working through his rut
Even then, Zevlor is noticeably rougher with you than usual
Has you in a missionary position, his whole body pressed to yours as he pants in your ear and thrusts into you
Zevlor can't keep his hands off you when he's in rut, they're all over your hips and chest and giving light tugs to your hair
He gives into the primal need to mark you too, it's the only time he'll give you hickeys
Breeding kink: the sequel
Absolutely tells you he's going to breed you, and fucks you like he means it
Doesn't even think as he uses his hands and tail to spread your legs so he can fuck you deeper
Zevlor loves to look at the way you tremble every time he fills you with cum, using his fingers to help you get off at the same time
Even while he's trying to find his own relief, he makes sure to make you cum so many times you end up overstimulated and about to cry from the pleasure
Definitely has you cockwarm him as the two of rest, the thought of you keeping his seed so deep in you until it takes just gets him going again
You'll know he's ready for another round when Zevlor starts grinding himself into you again
When the worst of his rut is over he gives you the best massages
Apologises so profusely too the first few times you help him through his rut, even if you tell him how much you like it
Rolan
There is no way Rolan is ever telling you anything about heats and ruts
Absolutely forbidd his siblings from mentioning it too, he's just way too embarrassed for you to know
Even when you guys are dating he just locks himself away in his tower for a week while he works through it and recovers
This man will not tell you anything
And then he forgets to lock the door
As soon as you open it you're met with the sight of a whiney, teary eyed Rolan trying to get off by grinding against a pillow in desperation
Unlike with the other two, there's no clear 'top' when you're with Rolan during his rut
He loves having you ride him until he sees stars just as much as he wants to bend you over his desk until everyone else in Ramaziths tower can hear you scream
Rolan loves hearing you when he's in rut
Yell his name, tell him that you belong to him, tell him how good he fucks you, say he looks so pretty when you ride him-
He loves all of it so much
He's also the one that bites you the hardest, expect him to draw at least a little bit of blood by accident
Breeding kink: the trilogy
Rolan isn't letting you leave the room unless he's knocked you up
Absolutely puts a fertility spell on you by brushing his hand over your lower belly and murmuring the words
He also refuses to pull out unless it's to change positions, and if any cum leaks out of you he'll push it back in with his fingers
Overstimulation is the name of the game with Rolan, he wants you both overstimulated and crying and completely fucked out
This man believes in equality and we love him for it
The youngest of the tiefling bachelors and definitely the most pent up, it'll take all day before he calms down enough for the two of you to rest
When things do calm down, after he makes sure you're both clean and fed, Rolan wraps you up with him in his bed and will read to you
It's his own personal flavour of aftercare, cuddling and reading your favourite book as he makes sure you're comfortable and happy
And it all starts over when you wake up the next morning with him hard as a rock against your ass
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bamfkeeper · 28 days
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Extra Step.
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RQ: 'So my mind has been absolutely overrun by the bamfs recently and I was wondering if I could request headcanons or a oneshot (or anything you're comfortable with making it really) with a reader that absolutely adores and coddles the bamfs and maybe even Kurt realizing he wants a kid with them because of it (but only if you feel like adding that). I just wanna cuddle a bamf honestly :') I feel like it would heal my soul.' - @shadykazama
Warnings: GN!reader, mentions of pregnancy/wanting pregnancy
A/N: Went with headcannons, a little shorter because I have another similar request I am writing out for this topic lol.
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Kurt knows how much you love the bamfs, the bamfs adore you right back. You treat them as your own, you love on them like they are the most precious things in the world.
They follow you around like little ducklings, piling behind you and making soft noises at you for attention.
Kurt notices how gentle and sweet you are with them, how you cuddle and soothe them, giving them lots of gentle kisses and snuggles. Sometimes he feels jealous, but he can't take care of them like you can.
You feed them all good food, you know their likes and dislikes, and you make sure they get lots of sleep. Honestly, you treat them like your own babies.
Kurt secretly watches as you hum to the bamfs as they are all tucked into bed, your hand gently stroking their heads as you give them their very last kiss of the night. Each bamf snuggles closer and makes gentle cooing, their little yawns show off their teeth and they snore lightly.
He just loves seeing you care for them like this, never did he think his partner would ever want to care for his bamfs in such a dedicated way. They were a handful, the rascals were wild and crazy, they made messes and were somewhat destructive. You always shrugged it off, they needed to let off energy.
Plus you were pretty sure that before, Kurt wasn't giving them enough ways to let out their energy.
It was only when he watched you holding one bamf like a baby in your arms did he realize he wanted more. He felt himself swallow as he realized that he wanted a baby with you. Not a bamf, a baby. He wanted to be a dad.
He watched you holding the bamf in a blanket, snuggling it like an infant. The urge grew stronger and stronger in him, he imagined it being your baby, his baby, cuddling it and gently humming down to the little one.
You hadn't noticed Kurt's obvious stares, or how he rubbed against you in a much more affectionate way. He had no idea how to bring it up or ask, he just knew it was something he wanted.
"Liebe...I have been thinking...." he grabs your wrists and looks you in the eye, "Let's have a baby." He blurted the words to you suddenly, and you were caught off guard by his confession.
"I see how you care for the bamfs, it makes me feel that I want a little one with you. I want to see you with a baby...our baby." He confessed further to you, telling you all his desires to make you a parent.
Initially you were a little unsure, since a baby is more serious than a bamf. But...you loved Kurt and couldn't say no. You felt just as excited about it.
Whether you can conceive naturally or adopt, Kurt feels so much pride and joy when he sees you holding your baby. He couldn't ask for anything else.
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Thanks for reading.
*BAMF*
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Dividers by @/adornedwithlight
Cover image from Nightcrawler (2014) #6
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beelmons · 1 year
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Luxury Poker Nights pt. 2
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Pairing: Hotch, Reid, Morgan x fem!reader Rating: Explicit, smut (18+, minors do not interact with this story) Word count: 5,806 cw: unprotected sex (do not recommend), sex-servant kink, voyeurism, multiple partners, non-vegan food options, slight degradation, free use kink Summary: It's Aaron's turn to host the poker night, and he figured it would be a great move to invite the entertainment they all fervently enjoyed last time: you. A/N: This was so highly requested I hope it lives up to expectations. Prompted by an original blurb found here Tag list: @illumi3 @ash-recs @canyonmooncreations @howabouticallyou @unlikelyqueenninja @kay-moranguinho and my always honorary mentions: @ihavemanyhusbands @cassiemartzz
Meeting Aaron Hotchner was nothing short of an absolute pleasure. Gentle, kind, considerate, funny when he finally got rid of the stoic boss facade, everything you would love in a partner whether casual or serious. All these reasons played a role in deciding to partake on a very specific contract: to serve as his servant, sexually speaking. 
"Hey," Aaron greeted you before leaning in to press a friendly kiss to your cheek. 
"Hey, Mr. Hotchner." you replied. 
His head tilted and eyebrows raised with playful offense "I've told you, if you don't want to call me Aaron, at least go with Hotch." 
Every so often he would call you in, mostly to a very beautiful house owned by a man you knew as Rossi, and you'd come for the sole purpose to act out your role. To serve and please them. 
This time, however, he was hosting in his own apartment. It was the classic bachelor pad, the adult version, barely decorated but tidy and resourceful. You had been in there only once, but you had memorized the area pretty well. He also looked especially handsome, navy blue polo shirt and denim black pants with casual sneakers, you could notice his toned biceps in that outfit. 
"What are my instructions for today?" you asked as you got in, taking a look around to remember the layout. 
"The usual. Although, I might ask you to take charge of the kitchen for a little bit. Bring snacks, beverages, nothing too complicated. Oh, and…” he began to say, reaching for a bag that was laying by the entrance “this.” 
From it, he pulled out what seemed like a traditional maid apron. You could tell he had it tailored for your body, and that the lace around it seemed to be fine, not the cheap ones costume stores had. You reached for it and pulled it from the strings you were supposed to tie, you hovered it over your body to catch a preview of what it would look like, the man had a good eye, it sure made you feel hot. 
“Of course, if it makes you uncomfortable, we can ditch it.” he tried to reassure you, seeing how you kept admiring the piece. 
“It’s alright, Mr. Hotchner. But a maid outfit? I thought you preferred me in the bare.” you teased. 
“Don’t worry, we still get plenty of access to the parts of you we love the most, being that the apron is the only garment of the costume you will actually wear.” his hands slipped in his pockets, his face lighting up with a smug smile “You can change in the bathroom, the guys should be here soon.” 
You made your way to the mentioned room to obey your first order of the night. Aaron waited patiently in the kitchen, putting together a couple more things so that the serving part of your job would be easier. Nonetheless, a knock on the door distracted him from his duty. He hurried to open, immediately being greeted by Morgan and Reid. 
“Hey, where’s Dave?” he asked, noticing a missing member. 
“He said he’s got something to do but he’ll catch us—” Morgan’s eyes fixed on something behind Hotch, and his train of thought completely disappeared “—later.” 
The boss turned around when he noticed Spencer’s perplexed eyes, similar to Morgan’s, and he smiled to himself as he turned around to watch you already in your ‘uniform’, to call it some way. The apron was comfortably secured around your waist, the length of it barely covering your front to the middle of your thighs, your back absolutely exposed, being that the fabric of the apron was only on the forepart, your upper body out in the open, with your nipples already perked from the cold air conditioning hitting them. And to them, you were the most beautiful of monuments. 
“What’s your safe word?” Aaron asked, his eyes immediately scanning your body.
“Cacao.” you said confidently, your head nodding in reassurance. 
Aaron looked back at Spencer and Morgan, making sure they caught what you had said. They both shook their heads in agreement, and so he locked the door behind them “Let’s begin poker night, then.” he ordered. 
“I’ll get some drinks for you guys.” you said, and you were about to move to the kitchen when Hotch’s voice stopped you. 
“I believe I haven’t given you permission to speak.” he emitted in a commanding voice. 
You understood his words for what they were: a warning. He had been clear enough, when you were there to work, you had to be diligent. Always keep yourself busy, available, and quiet, those were the rules you had signed up for. Your hands folded on your lap and you bowed your head slightly in response. 
Once they were out of your sight, you headed to the kitchen. You gathered a couple of snacks that Mr. Hotchner had prepared; some peanuts, pretzels, and cut up fruit, added with three open beers. He had let a tray out for you as well, possibly with the intention of making everything easier. By the time you got to the table and began to spread the food and beverages around they had already dealt the cards. 
You settled the empty tray on the side on a random surface, and Mr. Hotchner spread one arm in your direction indicating you that he wanted you to join his side; you did as he desired and his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you to sit on his leg. As if ritualistic, the hand that was closer to his body was grabbed and brought to his lips, a gentle kiss landed on the back of it, and then he guided it to his member, that at some point he had already exposed. It was an instinct, you already knew what to do. Your hand began to slowly massage the barely hard shaft, and you could hear him exhale particularly hard at the sensation. 
“Rules will change for tonight. You can’t bet ‘All in’ unless you have at least fifteen chips, and you can’t bet two rounds in a row.” Aaron began to say. 
“Isn’t 15 a bit expensive?” Spencer’s eyes narrowed with doubt. 
“Not at all, given that an ‘all in’ winner also gets 10 minutes to command our servant as they please.” his hand dragged upwards, purposely taking his time to brush your skin with his fingertips, nipple included, until they landed on your chin, tilting your face to have you look in the direction of the other two men “And you could agree, she’s worth the risk.” 
Your breath hitched in your throat at the way they hungrily stared at you, but they didn’t say anything further, both Morgan and Reid simply went back to looking at their cards. 
The game began and you hadn’t been given permission to move, you had to remain on Mr. Hotchner’s leg, caressing his member. He seemed unbothered by your steady movement, but you could feel him throb every so often, and it would fill you with cocky pride. That was another rule: you weren’t allowed to go rogue, they came when they wanted to, not when you caused them to. If you acted too smart and tried to make them climax before they wanted to, you were sidelined, given the silent treatment. That was more punishment than doing anything else to you, because chances were you were going to enjoy whatever else. 
You would steal a glance at random times to notice his tip swollen and reddened, even when he tried to keep composure, and continued to play his hands normally, you had learned the little twitches his dick made whenever he was getting close. His head turned to place a chaste kiss to your shoulder blade, giving you permission to keep going. Your hand trailed down to give his balls a gentle squeeze, which caused a loud groan to come out of his throat, and after a couple more fast strokes he began to spill his seed. 
Mr. Hotchner had been clear that he did not like messes; his entire member was coated in his semen, and some had spilled over his pants as well. You reached for one of the pockets the apron had sown on to find a handkerchief that you recognized as his, in seconds, you were on your knees, you wiped clean the fabric of his pants, his shaft, on the other hand, didn’t require the cloth, you grabbed at the base and licked a strip up, repeating the same movement until he was clean, and hard yet again. 
“All in.” Morgan’s voice snapped everyone’s attention, and since you hadn’t been given indication to do otherwise, your mouth kept working Aaron’s dick.
“Already? You’ve only won one round.” Spencer asked, his math not quite adding up. 
“I’ve got enough.” he clarified. 
“You got exactly 15, though, if you lose this, you don’t get any more.” Hotch looked in his direction.
Morgan’s head tilted slightly to the side, catching sight of your still bobbing head. He smiled as a response to his boss’s explanation, pushing the chips forward to the center of the table. 
“She’s worth the risk.” he said, a wink sent to Spencer. You couldn’t help but blush at his words, even if you weren’t able to stop your current activity unless indicated. 
The other two men exchanged looks, if they didn’t raise, they would still lose, perhaps that was part of Morgan’s scheme, but they weren’t about to just give you up by default. They pushed the corresponding chips to the pool in the center, and Reid was the first one to open his cards. Full house, nines over jacks. Hotch was in a slump, two pairs, queens and kings. 
“Full house.” Morgan said before he opened his cards, and Spencer’s attention was specially perked “Aces over sevens.” he finally said. 
Spencer let out a soft curse under his breath as Morgan laughed in pride, he was certainly rejoicing on having made that play. You received a light tap on your shoulder that indicated you it was time to move masters, and so you stood up and directed to stand next to Derek. 
“Actually, sweetheart, I will need you in the kitchen for a bit.” he said, his hand nonetheless landing on the skin of your rear, gently squeezing it “Peanuts and pretzels are a bit hard on my stomach, do you think you could make me a quick sandwich?” he asked ever so chivalrously.  
“Anything in particular you would like?” you asked, taking his question as permission to speak. 
“Some ham and bacon would be excellent, thank you.” with a soft slap of your ass he sent you your merry way. 
Kitchen duty was on the original arrangement, although you didn’t quite picture yourself making sandwiches, Derek’s smile was so charming you would learn gourmet cuisine just to please him. 
You gathered the required stuff, bread, some mayonnaise, and the ham and bacon. Being that you were topless, using a pan was out of the question, so you used the tray on the small electric oven that was next to the stove to cook the pork strips. You were too entranced by the silly way in which the meat shrunk to notice that Derek had walked into the kitchen, only becoming aware of his presence when he leaned next to you against the counter. 
“You make a great maid.” he pointed out, and you bolted up a little from the surprise. His hand instinctively reached for your waist, trying to keep you from falling back “Easy, you might hurt yourself.” 
Even when he made sure your feet were steady, he didn’t remove his hand from where it was, in fact, he simply took a couple of steps closer. 
“I enjoy servicing.” you said, eyes traveling south. You could see his cock already hanging out from his zipper, and you tried to reach for it in an attempt to caress it. His free hand, however, stopped you. 
“I can see that. You also take initiative, that’s impressive.” he began, his hand bringing yours up to press a kiss to it in a similar way Hotch used to do, but instead of allowing it to stroke his member, he directed it to the kitchen utensils you had laid out “But I believe for things to be done right they have to be done with the utmost concentration, so why don’t we focus on that sandwich, huh?” 
You pouted a little and he let out a light chuckle at your disappointment. You went back to the task at hand, getting a dull butter knife to begin spreading the mayonnaise around the slice. You felt the warmth of his touch leave your waist, and you were about to complain yet again until you felt one of his fingers sneak between your legs and trail up your slit. 
You shuddered and your legs instinctively closed. He tsk’ed his tongue in disapproval, and you understood to return them to their original position. Derek wasted no time, the two fingers in the middle of his hand slipping into your cunt. He was fixated on your face, absorbing every expression as you melted due to his digits, your hands gripping on the surface, leaving the sandwich unattended. 
“I haven’t told you to stop working, have I?” he whispered commandingly. 
His fingers began to curl upwards inside of you as they continued to move inside and out, getting coated with your juices. You tried your best to keep yourself still, your hand shakily reaching for the rest of the ingredients. He didn’t stop his movements even when you dropped the knife on the counter from the way he hit the back of your cunt.
“Careful.” he warned at the clinking sound, you peeked over your shoulder while you grabbed the utensil and out of the corner of your eye you could notice his hand moving over his now hardened cock “Come on, beautiful, keep going.” 
You shook your head a little in an attempt to clear it, even when his relentless fingers weren’t giving you the opportunity. You finally managed to pay attention and began to assemble the deli meats. You barely noticed when he moved behind you until you felt his tip rub against your entrance. 
His hands ran over your front as he pushed inside of you, slowly, and they landed on your breasts. A pleasure mewl slipped past your mouth, but you cut it short. 
“Come on, now, I’m not Hotch.” he complained while he gave you the chance to adjust to his member “You don’t gotta have my permission to talk, let that voice out.” 
His hips snapped rather roughly against yours, a loud slapping sound echoing around the kitchen; it caused a loud moan from you, one that you were sure could be heard from the other room. “That’s a good girl.” he praised. 
His initial rhythm wasn’t slow, after all he was in a hurry. It made assembling the sandwich all much more difficult, you struggled to open the door of the electric oven, almost getting burned thanks to the way his cock so deeply pushed inside you, all while your throat was unable to keep quiet, intermittent noises unsteady from his thrusts. 
One of his hands slipped down and in between your legs, the tip of his middle finger rubbed at your clit with a gentle speed, almost unmatching to his hips. You sensed him look over your shoulder to check up on the status of his food, and your hand trembled as you set the bacon down to finish it up. He laughed with pleasure, and his fingers dipped on the skin around your hips. 
“Can you take it, baby?” you could feel his thick member erratically twitching inside of you as he asked, and you nodded your head fervently “Of course you can.” he reassured. 
He snapped a couple more times, rough enough to make you lose your balance and press up against the counter, before you heard him grunt and felt your cunt being filled with his spill. The sensation of his cock pushing your walls sent you over the edge, and you began to drip with your release, a loud moan accompanying the blissful sensation. He pulled out with ease, not waiting for you to come out of your high, and stepped away to grab the meal you had prepared. 
“Thank you, beautiful, looks delicious.” he winked at you with his signature charming smile before he began walking out of the kitchen “Oh, and pretty boy said he wanted some iced tea, be a doll and bring it after you’re done cleaning up, thanks.” 
Without further word, he vanished from your sight. You had to take a second to catch your breath, desperate for a bit more friction. You considered touching yourself, but if Mr. Hotchner were to catch you, you wouldn’t be able to come again all night, he would make sure of it. 
You could feel Derek’s cum beginning to drip, but the cleanliness of the kitchen was a priority. You abided by the task that you had been handed, after a couple of minutes of cleaning up, since you hadn’t made a big mess, you prepared the beverage for Dr. Reid and headed back to the area. You settled the glass of iced tea next to the man that had requested it. 
“All in.” as soon as you stood next to him, you heard the youngest of the group exclaim, he then muttered a casual ‘thank you’ at the gesture of having his drink brought over. 
Hotch and Morgan exchanged playful glances. They knew he was rushing, his decision possibly prompted by the fact that your breasts were so close to his face; they noticed the bobbing of his adam’s apple, and Aaron had paid attention to how he palmed his bulge while he heard you get taken in the kitchen. Logic just flew out of the window when you were around, and his coworkers adored seeing that side of him. 
“You got me.” Morgan said as he folded his cards, and Reid cockily took a sip off his drink.  
“I’ll play.” Hotch mentioned before adding his chips to the pool. 
“Two pairs. Kings and Queens.” Spencer opened his hand. 
On his part, Hotch could simply scoff while he threw his cards on the table. “Jacks and Queens.” he said with pretend defeat. 
The blond man boasted with his expression in pure pride. He didn’t use to be the kind to order you around, unlike the other two who had gotten very comfortable, and preferred you took the initiative during game sessions. 
This time, nonetheless, he looked quite eager to take control. Once he noticed you looking at him expectantly, waiting patiently for your command. He narrowed his eyes, ever inexperienced, trying to come up with something, or rather trying to find the right way to ask. 
“Could you…” he stopped to try and analyze his next words “Could you bend over?” he motioned towards the table. 
It took your entire strength to not laugh, you weren’t making fun of him, he was just ridiculously adorable, and it made hard contrast with the whole situation in the first place and his actual sexual interests. You obeyed, not wanting to make him self-conscious, moving Derek’s plate out of the way elegantly before resting your entire body face-down against the piece of furniture. 
You let out a quiet whimper from the contrast in temperature; your ass was left up and exposed in his direction. He finally stood up, and you looked back to peek at what he was up to, his hips had lined up with yours, his member was still clothed, but that didn’t stop him from grabbing at your asscheeks and pressing his bulge against your dripping cunt. 
“Why don’t we change the game?” his eyes were glued on your skin wrinkling up with every push, but he kept talking to his coworkers “How about blackjack? Hotch can play house” he proposed. 
“Reid, it’s literally illegal for you to play blackjack in two states.” Hotch pointed out. 
“That’s true. You have an unfair advantage.” Morgan added. 
“Card counting can only be done with extreme concentration and observation of the cards being dealt.” his eyes didn’t leave your body, his palm gently massaging your skin as he kept rubbing himself on you “And I happen to be too busy to pay enough attention.” 
“Alright, but blackjack is a fast game. The player needs to win at least three rounds to claim their prize. Draws don’t count towards the winning number.” Aaron clarified.
The rest of the players nodded in agreement. Mr. Hotchner was the dealer, since he was playing the role of ‘the house’, and he began assigning the first round of cards. Before he got to Reid, though, he noticed there was no space on the table, your body occupying most of it, and so he resolved he would just put it over your naked back. 
You gulped in surprise and your body seemed to get hotter, you surely weren’t expected to be used this way; your nipples brushed against the surface of the table, and Reid noticed how you pushed back against him slightly. 
The doctor pulled away, satisfied for the time being with the friction that he had gotten, and realized there were a couple of white-ish stains. 
“Come on, Morgan!” he exclaimed once he noticed it was semen “Can’t you clean up after yourself?” 
Derek could only break into a laugh, and you noticed a small smirk on Aaron’s face as well. 
“Sorry, kid.” he simply said, waiting for Hotch to open his second card. 
Reid made an unamused expression and crouched down to observe the situation. You still had some drip down your thigh, and your slit still had some traces of Morgan’s release. 
“I’ll help you out, but I need you to do something for me.” he said, palming at your ass to let you know he was talking to you; you hummed, replying that you were listening intently “I won’t be able to use my mouth, so if I suck, it means hit, if I insert, it means stay” 
You furrowed your brows with confusion, but he didn’t give you much time to understand. You felt his tongue trail up your inner thigh, taking the liquid that had spilled over it with it, and shortly the muscle pressed against your slit, taking a lap at your entire sex.
Your hands gripped at the side edges of the square table, on your right side Derek Morgan was looking intently at his cards, on your left Aaron Hotchner was paying close attention to the youngest’s movements. He snapped back to the game once your pleased noises started flowing, his hand darting out to land on top of yours and rub at the back of it slightly. Aaron dealt the second round of cards and Reid’s landed on your back once again. 
“14.” the older man said. 
A little distracted by the way his tongue teased your labia, you didn’t pay attention to the words the dealer had said until you felt Spencer’s lips wrap around your clit and intensely suck the air in. The sensation, which was foreign, made your legs go weak; the man pressed his face against your rear to keep you up, and it only made the interaction so much hotter. 
“Hit me!” you exclaimed in between moans. 
“8. Adds to 22.” Hotch said calmly. 
Reid grumbled against your cunt, his tongue going back to your entrance instead, superficially licking, taking his time to taste everything around it. 
Morgan was busted as well, which meant the house took the round. Spencer kept a steady and slow pace; you felt the cards being removed from your back and, almost immediately, a new one was added. 
“20.” Hotch said again. 
The youngster’s hands had been placed against the outer sides of your thighs in the meantime, however once he heard the number they traveled up. He pulled away and you slightly whined at the lack of contact, his thumbs spread the outer part of your pussy open and his tongue immediately slipped inside your entrance. 
“Stay.” you struggled to let out, only coming out as a shaky breath. 
Hotch opened a couple more cards, Derek was busted again, so there was a chance for Reid’s win. 
“21 for the house, house wins.” Aaron exclaimed. 
Your head defeatedly laid against the wooden table, the man buried in your rear could feel your walls clenching and your hips slightly moving to grind against yours. Your shaky breaths didn’t only alert him that your second orgasm of the night was coming, the other two men could also tell. 
“Reid, your time with her is almost up.” Aaron pointed out after taking a look at his watch. 
Spencer pulled away once again, to your discomfort, and narrowed his eyes pretending to think.
“I’ll tell you what, win this round and I’ll let you orgasm.” Reid proposed to you. 
You trembled a little with anticipation, feeling your orgasm edging on. Instead of allowing his tongue back on you, he simply pressed open-mouthed kisses to your labia, making sure he wouldn’t touch any sensitive areas. 
Aaron dealt another round of cards over your back, not even paying attention to your begging face. 
“16.” he notified you since your eyes were tightly shut with irritation from being so close yet unable to release. 
“Hit me.” you commanded, still feeling Reid’s wet lips kissing your sides. 
“3. Adds to 19.” He clarified as he threw another card against your back. 
“Hit me.” you said once again.
Aaron and Spencer exchanged looks, it was a very risky move, statistically heavily improbable.
Hotch opened the new card against your back, and he let out a pleased chuckle. “2. Adds to twenty one.” 
Reid laughed with incredulity, but he was a man of his word. His lips clasped your sensitive nub once again, and he sucked the air in as his tongue moved rapidly from side to side. A high-pitched moan at his movements, and you couldn’t help but to release your juices over his face. You could hear an erotic slurping sound from the back, he was abiding by his promise of keeping you clean. 
“Well played!” he beamed at you and cleared the cards from your back “That was a very unlikely pull, I’m surprised you made it.” 
“Certainly.” Hotch reassured as he dealt the next round of cards.
Reid had sat back down on his chair, and as the pieces of carton landed on you, you decided to stay put on the table. Spencer’s eyes would travel from his cards to your ass from time to time, almost as if he was pondering his next move after he won. 
However, he wouldn’t be as lucky, and neither would Derek, since the next round was won by the house, which meant Hotch was back in control. You were about to stand back up and his hand laid on your bare back, stopping your movement,
“Actually, honey, why don’t you remain there for a little bit more?” he commanded and you obediently remained “Reid, move.” he said standing up.
The younger furrowed his brows with unintentional defiance “But this is my seat…” he quietly complained. 
“You can have your seat back once I’m done with her.” Hotch said, his tone was as imposing, but you could tell he was a little more gentle. You didn’t know the exact nature of their relationship, but you had figured Spencer was a soft spot for him. 
He finally obeyed and stood up and away from the chair, leaving enough space for Hotch to stand behind you. You could immediately feel the tip of his member prodding at your entrance, after what Reid had done to you, you certainly didn’t need any more preparation. You were overstimulated as it was, but his cock was always welcome, and he could tell by the way you were clenching around nothing simply by having him so close. 
He smirked to himself at the feeling and immediately allowed himself inside of you. You grunted with pleasure as you felt him enter, your fingers, tired from gripping on the sides of the table, beginning to curl around in the air. 
“Here, you can grab onto this.” the ever so chivalrous Derek Morgan reached out to intertwine his fingers with yours, giving you a soft area for you to squeeze trying to not lose control. 
Mr. Hotchner wasn’t going to pretend being gentle, his thrusts picking up speed as soon as you had gotten used to his size. He moved his shirt slightly aside, enjoying every second of watching himself disappear between your contracting walls. He let out a soft groan in pleasure, and you could tell he was beginning to lose himself in you. His hand gripped at your buttock, squeezing roughly to help him move your hips back and forth. 
The other two participants didn’t seem to move a finger, they could only stare, with pleased expressions on their face, at the way tears began to prickle on the corner of your eyes. Reid reached to land a hand on top of your head soothingly, and his kindness was always appreciated. 
Your obnoxious sounds were a delight to the three of them, therefore they dreaded the tune of a ringing phone interrupting the melody they adored. Hotch reached for the gadget within his pocket, furrowing his brows at the caller ID. 
“Yeah, JJ?” he said and made a ‘shushing’ sign to Spencer and Derek. 
Reid gently moved his hand from your head to your mouth, initially he was simply going to cover it with his palm, but an impulsive thought beat him to it: his index and middle finger slipped inside your mouth and pressed against your tongue. 
“Suck.” he ordered in a whisper “It will help you keep quiet.” 
You obeyed the doctor’s order, however, focusing on coating his digits in your saliva; your sounds were kept muffled in your throat, but they escaped your lips from time to time, since Aaron was not giving you a second of rest. 
“Can’t it wait? I see. It’s fine, Reid and Morgan are with me, call Dave, we’ll meet you there in 15.” Hotch continued instructing. He was doing his best to appear unbothered, and he was purposely hitting deeper each time, almost making it a challenge for you to keep your sounds down. 
“A case?” Morgan inquired as soon as his superior got off the phone. 
“And urgent.” he put the device away once again and leaned slightly over you. His fingers glued themselves to your clit, circling it slowly, he was trying to, most likely, rush your orgasm. The pleasure it brought to you was a little painful, being that it had been the part of your body that had received the most attention during the night. You whined at the sensation, and Reid had to slide his fingers further back to keep you from screaming. 
“You know, Hotch, there’s a question that I’ve been meaning to ask for a while.” Spencer suddenly emitted, and Aaron looked curiously in his direction, prompting him to inquire “Are you really paying her?” 
The question caused Hotch to chuckle slightly “No, it’s more like an arrangement.” he confessed, still focused on pounding your cunt. 
“Then what does she get out of it?” his eyes narrowed as he observed you, fucked out of your mind, swallow your cheeks around his fingers. 
“She gets to come,” he clarified “as many times as she can take.” 
As he spoke, his hand raised to land a loud, yet not utterly strong, slap on your ass; he did that sometimes when he allowed you to release. His hips snapped one final time, pressing all the way in to spill his cum inside of you. Your third orgasm of the night was divine, your teeth slightly gritting against Reid’s skin. 
You laid there, absolutely exhausted, for a couple of minutes as they gathered their things and fixed up their clothes. Once you had recovered your energy enough to stand up, you felt your knees betraying you almost immediately. Morgan bolted from his nearby spot to offer his body as support, his arm surrounding your middle. 
“You alright?” he asked with concern and you nodded. 
“Here.” Spencer came closer with a wet wipe that he handed to you. 
“I’m sorry we can’t see you off, but this is urgent.” Hotch came out of a random room with a briefcase on his hand and his pristine suit already on “Rest as much as you want and help yourself to anything in the kitchen, just make sure to lock the door when you leave.” 
Without saying any further he leaned closer to you and pressed a gentle kiss to your lips. He muttered a ‘let’s go’ directed to his subordinates and almost dashed outside the apartment. Morgan simply took a quick peck at the side of your head and told you to ‘take care’. Spencer stood there awkwardly for a second; you could see in his eyes that he was trying to do something, anything, but he couldn’t find the right gesture. Unable to take it much longer, you curled your hand into a fist and offered it in his direction. He bumped it with a fist of his own, and both of you laughed with a bit of embarrassment.
“Listen,” you said before he could move away, slightly entranced by his hazel eyes “the arrangement I have with Mr. Hotchner…” you diverted your gaze, suddenly slightly embarrassed “...it’s not exclusive.” you finally said. 
Spencer’s eyes opened and eyebrows raised in surprise, were you insinuating what he thought you were? His mouth opened and closed in search for an answer, but he struggled to make sense of anything, too scared to diffuse the interest you had shown in him. 
“You don’t have to agree right now,” you reached behind you, to the side table that had the landline phone on it, to grab a pad and a pen and immediately wrote down your number “if you want to explore a contract of your own, give me a call.” you said with a smile handing the paper over to him. 
“I will!” he said with almost too much excitement. 
“Reid!” Morgan yelled from the corridor. 
Spencer let out a quick curse and wrinkled his face with frustration “I’ll call you.” he said before he left in a rush. 
You giggled a little with teenage-like excitement, a feeling that you hadn’t experienced since you first started your dynamic with Mr. Hotchner. New guy, new conditions, new games. Perhaps poker is not the only way to have fun. 
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Omfg I ate that Vox fic up! The one where he hypnotized the reader after a long fight of them nearly being taken from him. Can you do a part 2 please? Like when the reader eventually learns he basically forced them to sign the contract and they find a way to be immune to his hypnosis? He goes absolutely nuts despite literally owning their soul. He's canonically a control freak and seems to even have some yandere traits. I hope I'm not going against your rules! You don't have any posted so I just wanna ask! Thank you for being awesome! :D Don't hesitate to turn down this request. Write what makes you feel comfortable. Just please respond so I and everyone else knows not to make a similar request in the future. Lots of love!
ABSOLUTELY!! I did take this in a slightly different direction, but hope you enjoy it nonetheless! Lowkey thinking of doing a Vox POV of this later and maybe even a part three...
Vox isn't actually in this much, but I feel a loose actual plot coming together and this is what naturally flowed for me.
I hope y'all are ready for more angst... plus a cliff-hanger <3
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More Than Anything Part 2 [Vox x Reader]
Part 1
Part 2.5
"You controlling prick!"
Vox ducked as you threw a pillow at him. Even in your righteous anger, you'd never actually truly try to hurt him, but by god were you pissed.
Despite Vox's obvious disdain for the Hazbin Hotel and its association with Alastor, you visited the hotel occasionally to catch up with your friend Angel Dust and give some much-deserved love to his pet pig Fat Nuggets. It was during one of these visits that you ran into Alastor, who immediately looked at you with disgust in his ever-present smile.
"Really now, my dear," he said as he shook his head in disapproval. "It's already enough of a shame that you have such poor taste in a romantic partner, but to give your soul to him as well? I thought you were smarter than that."
The overlord could see the aura of Vox's ever-annoying electric cords locked around your soul like chains. You'd been confused and his eye twitched with annoyance as he realized what Vox had done to you. To say you were livid after he explained that you'd been tricked was an understatement.
"Y/N, I'm sorry," Vox pleaded as you fumed at him in his room. "But you left me no other choice! You weren't listening to me and if I didn't bind your soul, then Satan knows what could have happened to you by now."
"Just because you don't fucking believe in my ability to look out for myself doesn't mean you get to just take my soul!" You screamed with hot, angry tears flowing down your face. You wipe at them, only crying harder at the frustration of the tears you couldn't control in your anger. You felt like they undermined your emotions.
Vox's magic sparked around him as he tried his best not to get angry and start a fight with you. He was terrified and was that much more susceptible to his angry tendencies in moments like these. It took everything in him to try and calm himself, not wanting to push you away further. His heart dropped and his blood ran cold as he saw you pull a large bag out of the closet and start shoving clothes into it.
"W-Where are you going?" Vox panicked as he crossed the room.
"The hotel," you said with quiet fury, as you stepped away from the closet and went to the nightstand with your personal things on it. "I need some space and it's the one fucking place I know you'd rather die again than follow me to."
"Ŷ̸̪͕o̸̢̿̿ū̷̫ ̶̬͂c̶̺̾͂a̴͒͘͜n̴̫̂̔'̶̡̉t̶͙̝̄͒," Vox said, his voice starting to glitch as his panic increased. "You've heard the news, the extermination is in a week and the angels plan on attacking there first. There's no guarantee they'll keep to the date after how much little miss dumbass pissed off heaven. It's not safe there."
You pull your bag over your shoulder and the look you gave him will haunt him for the rest of his afterlife. "It's safer than here."
It breaks him all the more when you shield your eyes from him and storm past him so he can't hypnotize you into staying. Vox is paralyzed with fear like never before. He wanted to scream, to beg, to stop you from leaving him, but he couldn't do anything as his system glitched so hard it forced him into a reboot. When he came to, he was alone. You were gone.
--
Charlie was more than willing to let you stay at the hotel. The two of you hadn't had the chance to really ever speak before, but she was always friendly when you came to visit Angel, even after you explained to her there was no way you'd be able to become a guest.
In exchange, you were happy to help set up the defenses against the extermination. You got to know all of the other members of the hotel and the work helped you push down the burning ache in your chest.
Vox had been trying to contact you nonstop. You eventually turned off your phone, driven insane by the wall of notifications of him begging you to respond in any way. He knew you were okay for the time being. He was literally connected to your soul. But as the extermination day grew closer, his panic only increased. If it wasn't for Valentino and Velvette holding him back, there were several times he genuinely would have set aside his pride and come to the hotel just to get you.
It was after helping Husk and Cherri put up a particularly tricky barrier with the dwindling supplies that Angel found you taking a break. He passed you a water which you took gratefully as he slid down the wall and joined you on the floor.
"So," he started. "Are we going to ever talk about the reason why you're hiding out here?"
"Do we have to?" You groan, running your fingers through your hair. Despite the smiles and laughter you'd been sharing with your newfound friends as you all prepared for the potential end of it all, the dark circles on your eyes gave away what was lurking underneath.
For as angry as you were at Vox, you missed him. You missed feeling him curl against you in bed. You missed being woken up at unholy hours early in the morning because Vox couldn't start his day without giving you a kiss and telling you how much he loved you. You missed his shitty taste in shows and how he'd collapse into your arms after a long day at work.
Angel sighed, looking at the boarded-up lobby. "Look I may not get it, but you love the guy, right? Are you really content with possibly dying in a couple of days for a cause you're not even a part of, just because you're pissed with him?"
"He stole my soul, Angie" You frown at him.
"And that is fucked up as hell," he agrees. "But I know you and I know there ain't no way in hell you're actually satisfied leaving shit like this."
"I just-," you start before groaning. "How the hell are we supposed to come back from this? I doubt he'd ever void the contract. He's too convinced he's right for that."
Angel sighed, setting his own cup aside. "Honestly toots, you're not gonna like it, but... He kinda has a point."
You whip your head up to look at him and he holds up his hands defensively. "Not saying that stealing your soul was the right call. Believe me, if anyone gets how fucked it is having your soul controlled by a sociopath with a big ego, it's me. But you're not exactly in the safest of places, dollface. Not to mention, you're dating an overlord who's in a trio determined to piss off as many big shots as possible. His mind may not be in the right place, but his heart kinda is."
You take Angel's words to heart and sigh as you bury your face in your arms. "I hate it, but you're right... I just... I don't want to hold him back. I don't want to be the person that needs to be protected. I want to be his equal, not his problem."
"Then tell him that," Angel sighs. His gaze drifts to the bar and smiles fondly. "Someone recently has taught me how important being real with yourself is. It's okay to be flawed. No one got stuck in this shithole cause we were perfect, y'know?"
He nudged you with a grin as he added, "Plus, come on. Can you imagine how many bitches in hell would kill to have a sexy fucker that wants nothing more than to love ya and keep ya safe? I love you toots, but for fucks sake, pick a struggle."
You snort, shaking your head as you lightly swat at his arm. "Fuck you for being right about shit all the time."
"It's one of my best assets," Angel smirked. "Y'know, aside from all the fluff."
You laughed as he puffed up his chest and by the end of the evening, you'd decided to head back. As much as you loved Angel and wanted nothing more than to be by his side as the extermination drew near, he had a point. This wasn't your fight and there was a controlling dumbass that had been blowing up your phone ever since you left that was praying for your return.
After exchanging promises to see each other after the extermination, you left the hotel. You had an idiot to see.
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xxximortalxxx · 1 month
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As much as you guys hate to admit it, the Five and Lila pairing makes sense and was not at all utter bullshit as you guys are making it seem.
From the time Lila was introduced, she came in as a strong character that's wild, sexy, fun, and a bit deranged. She's a badass character! And what happens? She meets Diego in a point in her life where she was at the height of chaos and adventure. They fall in love, or in a toxic situationship filled with family drama and mother/father issues.
Now let's look at Five. His situation is overall fucked. Imagine being some kid that grew up with space/time travel powers and getting stuck in time, having to grow up pretty much before all of his siblings, and then having to come back in his KID body and still have to fix THEIR problems on top of dealing with his own mental issues that he acquired and loneliness. Reminder that he would not have had a partner due to his inconvenient life/appearance.
Lila and Diego are in this marriage with kids after trying to live a "normal" life. Lila feels stuck because she basically trauma bonded with some guy that happened to be there and was able to put up with her issues and vice versa. Diego was convenient. And from what I see, she really just wanted to make a family she didn't have. Their relationship is kinda out of obligation for their kids at this point, and neither of them are happy.
At this point, Five and Lila get stuck in time together after having previously been on opposite sides but coming together for family sake. From the beginning they matched each other's energy and even I would say they complement each other. They both have explosive personalities filled with sarcasm, snark, and a bit of humor. They both enjoy danger and a rough tussle. That's all they have known.
At this point, both Five and Lila have experienced so much in their lives, so much adventure already. They are ready to settle down, because sometimes love is the adventure you're looking for in this crazy world.
And look I get it. Badass lady is reduced to housewife trope that shouldn't exist unless within character. But can we really say this is out of character for Lila? She always does the unexpected, so her going off to be a spy is what we would expect, for her and Five.
And I also get that you guys think that Five would never betray his family like that. This isn't a perfect world and neither are these characters. If anything, we've seen Five do things for his own self interest over what the family/others want. Same for Lila.
Add in the loneliness of DECADES from Five and the trapped loneliness Lila feels within her marriage, and the fact they they go on another mission together over SEVEN years, mixed with their explosive dynamic and you have a pairing.
And explosion seems to be the theme for this season right? With Ben and Jennifer. Sometimes 2 exlosive chemicals become more stable rather than creating a blast. And maybe each other is what Five and Lila needed. They both understand each other in ways Diego could never understand Lila. Lila also understands Five's predicament like no other, having lived it first hand with him in the Seven years. It's only natural that they would come together. Lila and Diego were eventually going to divorce because they weren't compatible. Lila has always had the most chemistry with Five.
I get the cheating and in no way do I excuse it, but these characters have no idea when they will ever get back home and if. I think they would go absolutely crazy if they didn't have each other. In this time, they realized how similar they are and ended up being a better match. They found what they were looking for in each other. And you can't deny their connection like come on.
In my experience, in the real world, love is messy and not perfect. Sometimes finding love is your next adventure after you've live a life like no other. Maybe this will be good for them.
Also, they writers arent crazy or out of pocket, you guys just need to grow up.
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shepscapades · 2 months
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... that lean makes me think of the lean Bdubs did in the syncing comic....which if course begs the question: Did Etho pick up this habit of leaning to indicate processing/suspicion from Bdubs or did Bdubs pick it up from Etho? (or is it just a good way to show that emotion in comic form XD) Also.... the hair clip... My impression is that the flashback is from pretty early on. Is the hair clip a precursor to the well known headband? In universe, why a headband? Since they both do wear headbands... Was the headband originally Bdub's? Is... I know Etho is scared during the whole Last Life thing... is he thinking that Bdubs is planning specifically on targeting one of the androids? Or is that his fear talking?
... And after all that speculating... Ouch, Poor Tango!! ( i know this is an important event for Tango, but we don't see any of his reaction or feelings about any of this yet)
Wonderful comic, as always, Shep!
WEEE These are such good questions omg :DDDD alright i couldn't shut up so i'm putting it under a read more =w=
this is basically a mini comic breakdown! just rambling about some of the dbhc plot and mecahnics >:D
The lean is such a fun detail, i didn't even realize the similarities-- but it's actually a really nice (totally intentional) callback! I think Etho absolutely picked up those mannerisms from Bdubs, the same way Doc did from Ren, and so on so forth-- the androids, especially throughout season 8 and last life, are using their partnered hermits (and the other hermits in general) to learn what it means to be and act human-- vocal mannerisms, physical mannerisms, learning emotions for the first time and what it means to feel them, everything! I kind of see Season 8 as their "young" period-- their first season, the season they learn who they are and develop some of their most iconic traits. Etho is still himself, shyness and stoicism and all, but he learns his whimsy and silliness and teasing nature from being with bdubs for so long :)
THE HAIR CLIP <333 Yeah Etho's "Replaying Memory" moment is when Doc was checking out his "wounds" / the damage he sustained (from the initial creeper blast that caused his deviation) for the first time! At the time of the memory, It had probably been a little while since the actual initial incident where Bdubs had covered him up a little bit to hide the damage, but i'm sure doc or someone else noticed before long LDFKGJDF so this is their first like... "checkup"! So Etho is pretty young here (Doc too, but he already has his robot arm at this point, so...), maybe within the first month or two of season 8. So he definitely normally wears a bandana at this point (the same band bdubs made him wear initially to cover up the forehead cracks a little), but he's clipped his bangs back here so Doc can get a better look at the damage :)
I have a LOT of feelings about Etho's mental dialogue throughout last life, and it's very complicated and i won't be able to shut up about it so that's for another post. I will say, I don't think Etho ever truly thought Bdubs would Boogey kill him (though, doubt is a very powerful thing, so it turns out). I think Etho is still puzzling Bdubs out (though he's definitely learned quite a lot about him), especially when it comes to more serious situations like this, so the unknowns are definitely the biggest sources of fear for him. He can only do so much with the data he currently has, and the idea that a weapon so sharp could permanently damage any of the androids... it's an unsettling thought, regardless of whoever the mostly likely victim ends up being. (I don't think Etho expects it to be Tango, either-- not until he sees that look in Bdubs' eyes 10 seconds before it happens. I think Doc's little speech about their models is just helpful information for the reader and a sense of foreshadowing (as well as a reminder for Etho of how Not-So-Indestructible he is/the other androids are), not so much that etho thinks it's going to be tango after recalling the memory. Same for Bdubs. I dont think bdubs decided to target Tango until he was staring the back of his neck down and realized he could take the opportunity before he lost it). Anyway i've already rambled too much /silly
And lastly, Yes. This is, besides his deviation, probably Tango's most formative moment. The second time he truly experiences rage. I don't know if I could do a comic or an illustration that truly does his rage moment justice after he wakes up post-respawn and has a meltdown trying to kill bdubs, but knowing that Skizz wasn't built until s9 and is therefore missing from Last Life (AKA, Tango has no one other than Etho and Bdubs), just... makes this betrayal so, so much more painful. This betrayal is very much about Tango's rage, but it's also about his sense of trust and safety and his understanding of the way the world works. Hermitcraft is safety and jokes and support, and sure there's a bit of death here and there, but this is unlike anything he's ever known-- it's adrenaline and fear and threats and betrayal and. Anyway what a normal meltdown to have! And Etho can do nothing to calm him down except hold him back from killing bdubs (there's something to be said there too, about Tango knowing for certain now that Bdubs obviously chooses Etho over himself (Because come on, Bdubs wouldn't have killed Etho. Let's be honest here), but knowing too that Etho is choosing bdubs by not letting Tango get the revenge he so rightfully deserves...) Anyway. I think i'll explode if i think about this more
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selineram3421 · 2 months
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Hey? I just found your account and absolutely love it!
When you write with Alastor I always get this vibe from him:
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And absolutely love for it 😭🥰
Oh my god.
Matched Search History
Prologue
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Alastor X Writer Reader
Warnings⚠
⚠ Human AU, serial killer stuff so expect murder or mentions of it, oh and blood/gore, cussing, all caps for screeching/yelling, italics=thoughts, mentions of death, slight introvert reader ⚠
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It wasn't your idea but your friend's.
There was a website that matched you with someone that had similar search history.
Currently, both of you were in the cafe with coffee and snacks, sitting at a two person table and having the usual friend hangout until she brought it up.
"Isn't that...a breach of privacy? How is this allowed?", you asked concerned.
"They only get what you give them! Like a questionnaire thing. You put down what you search and they set you up with someone!", she says and shows you the site on her phone.
"This is shady as fuck.", you say.
"Ok, maybe a little bit but you put what you want shared!", she smiles. "I mean you can meet another writer or someone who is super hot!"
Honestly you didn't know what to think of it, but maybe you could give it a shot.
I mean what's the worse that could happen? Haha..
"Ok..", you sighed and gave her the go to for making your account.
"Yay!", she squealed and started up a new profile. "Ok, so name, age, occupation..", she started typing furiously.
Once the basics were set up, she passed the phone to you to fill out the questionnaire.
At Matched Search History we only share what you give us! Any information you put into the system will be coded to find your Search History Partner, any other information you add in will also be added but stored away privately.
Please be aware that if any home address is added in the BIO or in MESSAGES it will be made public.
Yup. Shady shit right here. You thought and kept reading.
What do you search the most?
Answer: _______
You snort and type out murder techniques and first aid.
I'm definitely on the FBI list. You smile.
After taking care of the first one, you put down recipes, art and art history, science, little things like radio technology and other in depth research. You also make sure to put down cats.
"Here.", you hand the phone back.
"Wow that's a lot.", your friend scrolls down your list.
"What did you expect? I do a lot of searching on my laptop for the littlest things.", you shrug.
"Yeah, should have expected that.", she nods and looks through her photo album in her phone.
Leaning on the table, you look as she scrolls for the perfect photo.
"Which one are you gonna pick?", you ask and take a sip of your coffee.
"That cute one where you're hugging a cat.", your friend replies.
"Nah. Put the Halloween one."
She stops scrolling to look you dead in the eye, only to see your smug grin.
"No."
"Aw what? Come on!", you whine. "It'll be funny!"
"No! You're covered in fake blood!", she rejects the idea.
"But think of it! It would be fucking hilarious.", you nudge her arm.
"No and that's final! I'm putting this one!", she says and adds a photo without looking.
.
You honestly forgot about the account you both made until you got a bunch of emails about the website finding your match. You ignored most of them as they didn't go over 70%, that was until you saw the one you got today.
"What?", you asked with a mouth stuffed with noodles, being in the middle of eating lunch.
Picking up your phone, you check the email and feel your eyes widen.
You immediately called your friend.
"DUDE!"
"What?", she asks.
"THERE'S A HOT GUY WHO MATCHED 98% WITH ME!! WHAT DO I DO!?!?"
"Send me his pic! Duh!", she replies.
You take a screenshot of his profile picture and send it over.
"HOLY SHIT! I KNOW WHO THAT IS!!!"
"Who is it?", you ask.
"Don't you listen to his podcasts!?", your friend screeches. "He's the hot voice talking about murder mysteries and other creepy shit! You always listen to him while writing!"
"Huh, so this is him?", you ask. "How do you know? You hate hearing creepy stuff."
"I got bored one day.", she says.
Understandable. You thought. "Ok but back onto the topic. WHAT DO I DO!?"
"Send that love message to meet up!", she replied.
You deadpanned.
I have to go outside? I mean it wouldn't be bad if we went to a cafe or library. Maybe a bookstore... You thought.
"Fine. Since we already know his face he won't be able to run far if anything happens.", you said, making up your decision.
"Geez, don't talk like you're about to die.", your friend groaned.
"What? It's true.", you say. "Statistically, women are more likely to get killed on a date. Which doesn't rule out males but it does happen."
"UGH! Send me pics of what you're going to wear already!", she demanded.
.
You sat on a bench near a bus stop, messaging your friend. It was the best location for you to wait, there were multiple people around and restaurants with cameras.
Not gonna find out my address~ You sang in your head as you messaged your "match" that you had arrived.
You messaged him a brief description of your features and what you were wearing, so that way he wouldn't go around like a headless chicken trying to look for you.
Just in case things went south, you had a back up outfit to change into.
As you waited, a sudden thought came up.
Why was he on the dating site MSH? You wondered. Maybe his friend also pressured him to make a profile or someone else.
Then another thought.
What if it isn't him and someone just used a random photo they found to put up? You frowned at that. I hope that's not the case. That would be very annoying to deal with.
"Now, I hope that I'm not the reason my date is wearing a frown."
Turning your head to see who had decided to approach you, you saw a familiar face and warm reddish copper eyes. He was dressed very nicely, white button up long sleeve, dark red knit sweater vest, black pants, and black looking dress shoes.
"I'm Alastor.", he smiled. "And you are my date for this evening, yes?"
Damn it. You thought, trying to keep a straight face. He looks like a bookish nerd and that is definitely my type.
You stood up from the bench and gave a smile back.
"Nice to meet you.", you greeted and then introduced yourself.
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Thank you for bringing this to me. I have read this post but forgot about it until you brought it back.
~Seline, the person.
Taglist@
@c4rved-pumpk1n @scary-noodlesblog @stolas-thebirb @naelys-the-aster @biromanticboba @lbcreations-blog @ducky-died-inside @kiraisastay @pooplyface1423 @line-viper @117s-girl @spiderlegsling @alastorsgoldie @kcsketches @lofasofabread @kotaleee @im-coolrat @superzombiewho @speckle-meow-meow @jammcookie @dilucragnvindr-my-beloved @trashbin-nie @koioli @fatherlesschild2 @mmik3yy @just-here-reading @nealeart @hudiexiaoying @crystal-multiplefandomlover @glowinggoldfish0 @tiredgamerhere @fluffy-koalala @valenfawkes @willowshadenox @aria-tempest @alastor-simp @nonetheartist @gallantys @i-3at-kidz @luxky-aish @ceafighter @xalygatorx @xangel-8 @big-brother-problems @mistpurpl3 @chewbrry @willowbrookhoot @briethekitsune @alastorthirsty @sir-aadiboii @fuzzyturtlepaws @+?
ML II for Alastor🎙
327 notes · View notes
flippinpancakes64 · 2 months
Note
Hi hiii !! I luv your work sm !! I was wondering if i could request something like the cullens with a very sweet/gentle look about them, (pastels, like coquette) but they love heavy metal, horror, they collect odd things like bones and such ! I love the way you write and all your work so far !! <3
The Cullens with a Reader who has an opposite aesthetic
Thank you so much for the kind words!
I was having so much trouble trying to come up with a title for this btw
And I definitely understand this one. My car is completely decorated with pink cutesy stuff and then I blast mcr so
Anyway thank you for requesting and I hope you enjoy!
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Edward:
He got whiplash the very first time he saw you
He could hear the music playing through your headphones, but he did not think it was coming from you
He thought he must have been going crazy or something
But he loves it
Blah blah insert something very deep and philosophical about you two being very similar
He thinks of himself as two very different things
The one that people see, the beautiful man
And then the monster he is on the inside
So he feels like you two are one in the same
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Alice:
She absolutely loves it
She loves anything to do with fashion in the first place
And she thinks it’s so fun that you’re such a polar opposite on the inside
It always amuses her whenever she asks you what you’re listening to and you give her an earbud
Only for it to be like death metal
She enables this btw
Anytime she sees something cutesy she buys it for you
And if she sees any bones she gives them to you too
“Hold on Jasper there’s a deer skull over there, I need to get it for my partner”
“…what”
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Jasper:
He would love you the same if you wore a trash bag
He doesn’t particularly care
He’s not really too “hip” with subcultures to know that bright pink and screamo music don’t really go together
So he doesn’t really see anything odd with it
As for collecting weird stuff like bones and various horror paraphernalia, he’s a little confused
Like what do you mean you want his scraps after he’s done hunting?
But he’ll do it anyway
He always makes sure to clean off a piece of whatever he ate that day to bring it back to you
He just loves seeing you happy
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Rosalie:
In a way, she’s the same as you
She presents herself as a stereotypically beautiful woman
But on the inside she loves rebuilding and fixing up cars
So that aspect she can understand at least
What she’s a little confused about I is your love for horror movies
I feel like she doesn’t get them
She just thinks they’re all funny
She’s tried to sit down and watch them with you before, but she just can’t get into them
“The color of the blood in this movies is so wrong”
“That’s not what zombies actually look like”
“These people are so stupid! Just leave the house and go to the police!”
And she’s a little grossed out by the bones thing
She might bring you back a bear tooth if you ask nicely, but don’t make it a habit
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Emmett:
He’s so down
He loves it
Some guy tried to make fun of you once, asking if you were listening to like cocomelon or something at school and you just unplugged your headphones and cannibal corpse started blasting
He didn’t talk to you again after that
He thinks it’s hilarious
And I feel like he would like his partners to be a little freaky
Like hell yeah babe I’ll bring back a mountain lion femur
He secretly thinks you’re a witch or a sorcerer or smthn
He won’t ask though
That’s between you and your spell book
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Esme:
She was so confused at first
She got to know you at first, hanging out with you a couple of times, and then randomly on like the fifth date you asked to aux
She was shocked to say the least
And don’t even get me started on when she first saw your bones and other weird stuff
She definitely rethought the relationship
But she loves you and who cares if you’re a little weird
She’s not gonna bring home anything for you tho sorry
If you want weird shit you’re gonna have to go get it yourself
I have a feeling she doesn’t really like horror movies either
She jumps too easily
So you guys are gonna have to agree to disagree
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Carlisle:
He doesn’t really care too much
Not in the way that he doesn’t care, but in the way that you could literally wear anything and he would still love you
He is a little shocked by your music and movie tastes at first, but ultimately he doesn’t care
He’ll sit down and watch your movies with you as well
They’re not his favorite, but he can stomach them
He won’t talk bad about them at all
He’s very respectful
And if you ask him to, he’ll bring back all of the bones you could ask for
He’ll clean them up for you and everything
He’s just a spoiler at heart
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Vampire! Bella:
She loves it
She thinks it’s so fun that you look so different from what you actually like
She was pretty shocked at first
Definitely did not expect it from you
But she’s pleasantly surprised
She enjoys horror movies and heavy music too, so you guys get along
She’s always down to let you aux or pick out the movie you guys watch
And she’s always ready to bring you home whatever you want
You want specifically a moose skull?
Well, she was going to go hunting for a bear, but she’ll run up to Canada for you
157 notes · View notes
IT’S YOU, HAPPY ALL THE TIME ─── jonathan breech ✧☾𖦹
ೃ⁀➷ “I ask Jessica what drowning feels like and she says not everything feels like something else." — ‘Jessica gives me a chill pill’, Angie Sijun Lou.
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pairing. jonathan breech x reader
summary. you’ve bared your heart to your bestfriend, jonathan, more times than you can count, whilst knowing practically nothing at all about him. what is friendship if it is not equal… what is love if it is not returned? can your relationship survive such one-sidedness?
warnings. swearing, TW mention & description of suicide/attempts & depression, very introspective/kind of a character study???, alcohol & drug use, pining, ANGST!!!!, crying, fluff, smut with feelings, p in v, unprotected sex, oral sex (f), SMUT UNDER THE CUT! 
word count. 10k (WTF??!?!!??)
a/n. the title is from “she won’t go away�� by faye webster:) btw this is… rly angsty (and SO long omg im still in shock) so beware🫡 ALSO IM SO SORRY FOR NOT POSTING IN WHILE!! SCHOOL IS KICKING MY BUTT & THIS FIC WAS AN ABSOLUTE MONSTER TO WRITE LMAO
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i. 
There are very few words in your vocabulary you can use to accurately describe Jonathan Breech. 
The boy is an enigma, a matryoshka doll that never ends: he is witty and lighthearted and sarcastic, but you’ll always catch that edge, the air of malaise he carries around himself, the unspoken elephant in the room that screams WHO ARE YOU REALLY?
He had always been more of a figure, a landscape; something to witness, observe-- experience without letting it do the same to you. You don’t know if that’s something you want, either: there’s an imbalance in his hilarity, and he always takes things a step too far. Jonathan lights matches and lets them burn all the way down to his fingertips; he shaves and lets the blade leave stinging little nicks, rivulets of blood running down his neck; he chainsmokes cigarettes in his room and only opens the window when he feels his heart hammering in his chest, desperate for air. 
You meet him — or, first experience him in a similar fashion: he had been in the university library, standing on top of a creaky, old bookshelf, shouting something you couldn’t understand over the music blasting through your headphones. You could certainly see him though, gesturing animatedly, dressed eccentrically in his signature winter trapper hat and a velvet blazer. That thin, effeminate figure of his was making winding, marionette-ish steps along the wood, an action that had everyone readying themselves to catch his inevitable fall. 
Then, seemingly out of nowhere and catching you completely off guard, you caught his eye. He began stepping from one shaky shelf to the next, a complete miracle none of them toppled over, before stopping on one close enough for you to read his lips. 
“Hi,” he mouthed, shifting uneasily on his left foot before regaining a steady balance, “you’re in my class, right?”
You nodded, hesitantly— yes, truthfully, you’d seen him in your Introduction to Literary Studies course a couple of weeks ago, sporting the same outfit as he did now, but you thought nothing of him. He’d been generally well-behaved then, asking slightly odd but in-tune questions that more or less answered all your inquiries, so you didn’t think the guy would have a penchant for, well… book-shelf hopping. 
He grinned, about to say something else, before something — or someone, made him flinch. A professor, probably, considering the unintelligibly muffled, booming voice behind you. However, Jonathan made quick work of the situation, sneakily climbing down and escaping out the door. 
The next time you see him, he’s sidled up beside you in your shared class. “Mind if I sit here?” a familiar voice had asked, to which you murmured a non-committal knock y’self out, before realizing with wide eyes.  His presence had caught you off-guard, as he so often did, and you sensed a pattern blooming. 
Jonathan certainly made for an odd desk-partner; his personality warped the environment around you, and it was suddenly so much easier to tear your eyes away from the lecture and land on Jonathan’s own. It’s something you never thought you’d ever do, because you adore the material being taught. 
At the end of class, he asks you out for a drink: he’s just found the best Irish stout in the entire city, and what better way to make it known than to take anyone and everyone he knows there?
Rejection is written on your face clear as day— you have class tomorrow, an essay that needs to be finished, and honestly, pubs just aren’t really your scene. 
But in the end… you still bite. You can’t help it: he’s disarming and warm and looks like he should smell like a bonfire. Somehow, that just does it for your brain; it’s here you learn of the charm that is Jonathan Breech. 
That night goes everything and nothing like you expected: you expected not to be able to predict his actions, and that’s exactly what happens. When you meet Jonathan at the aforementioned pub, it’s not actually the one he’s meaning to take you to— it’s just the closest public place to the on-campus dorm, which is where he says he’s rooming. 
“‘ve got a neighbor m’pretty sure is trying to sleep with me,” he says absently, ushering you onto the back of his bike, which had been leaning against a NO PARKING sign. “He’s always toget’er wit’ our dorm advisor, so I should l reject him before I get kicked out, if y’get what I mean.”
Now, you honestly should’ve expected this from a guy who jumped from six-foot book shelves, but Jonathan’s biking is all swift turns and jilted stops, mere milliseconds from repeatedly running red lights. You want to ask if he just learned how to ride the thing yesterday, but can’t, not with how utterly reckless and shameless he is about it, his terrible steering making you instinctively wrap your arms around his chest. 
You clutch him tightly, making him hum in approval, and you feel your ears burn flusteredly. You would’ve pulled away, but then he cut from the right lane to the left in one swift move, barely missing several cars, and you practically shrieked instead. “Oh my god!”
“Sorry,” he apologizes quickly. You can’t see his face, having shut your eyes in fear, but after hearing the blatant cheekiness in his tone, you can imagine clear as day how gleefully it contorts. You want to slap him somewhere, anywhere, but that’d defeat the point of being mad at his recklessness, so you squeeze him tighter instead, and he chokes on his breath. “Jesus-- m’sorry, really!”
When the two of you make it to the pub — alive and uninjured! — annoyingly all the way across town, your first few steps off his bike are stuttered, dizzy: “We are-- not going by bike next time,” you gasp, leaning against a random brick wall. 
“Next time, eh?” He grins, and this time you really do slap him— just on the arm, bless your self-control and niceties not to beat this oddly comfortable-to-be-around near-stranger to death. 
The pub, with its forgettable name and dingy stools, has a minimal, lackluster crowd. A kitschy neon sign flickers and dies as you walk in, making you raise a brow, but Jonathan merely drags you by the arm to a cozy corner table, then disappearing deeper within the venue before returning moments later with two pints of black beer in tow.
“Go on, then,” he gestures, setting the tall glass on the table, sitting down in the chair in front of you and taking a hearty sip of his own drink.
You let out a little hesitant sigh at his words, before relenting and taking in a long gulp of the liquid. “…Huh,” you remark, impressed. Jonathan smiled knowingly behind his glass, letting out a smug little ah, you see? 
“Worth the long ride?” he inquired innocently, as if that was the only thing wrong with the night.
“Worth the ride, but not worth almost dying for,” you rolled your eyes goodheartedly, knocking back the rest of the bitter drink and making him whistle. 
The rest of the night goes like this: Jonathan orders two more rounds of the quality Irish stout before the two’ve you are stumbling out of the pub, exploring all the nightlife there is to offer, like the crowd surrounding an out-door live comedy group performing down the street that has you and Jonathan giggling for hours after, or the underground speakeasy you accidentally find yourselves shoved into, a nasally guitarist singing on a smoky stage, several more drinks finding themselves in your system despite how nauseous you already feel.
“You-- d’you fancy him?” Jonathan slurs behind you, steadying himself by pressing his hands to your waist.
“F-fancy who?” you blink blearily, leaning into his warm touch.
“Who else m’I talkin’ about, girl? The singer!”
You shake your head no numbly, practically collapsing into his arms now, your head lulling on his chest. You’re so close you can smell the distinct scent of his skin, that unique musk everyone has, and it’s strangely familiar, like those smells that evoke old, nostalgic memories. It’s like how sunscreen summons the smell of the sun after a childhood beach day, or how vanilla extract takes you back to the smell of your mother’s baked goods on a specific winter evening.
“Reckoned you wouldn’t,” he assumes, hands coming away from your waist to wrap his arms around your shoulders, swaying to the music slightly in the crowded club, “looks like a -- right bleedin’ dope… wit’ that mop of hair.”
You giggle, alcohol riddled beyond belief, unable to formulate a response with the conflicting blurry thoughts in your head: it’s telling you Jonathan Breech isn’t the crowd you want, that you need to go home and work, that you let loose too easily— but it also tells you that you can see yourself becoming friends with him very, very quickly. 
It’s there, in that club, Jonathan Breech moves into your life and fills a gaping hole you didn’t know existed, like a hole in your stockings you only notice when you get home. You have friends, certainly, more than you can count on both hands, but they never get as close as Jonathan does. After that night, an unknown force pulls the two of you together, making you run into him everywhere, and a tight friendship blooms like a lilypad in a raging storm; beauty within the chaos. In the multitude of close friendships you’ve harbored, he is the first to see so many sides of you. The last thing that did was your mother; it had only ever been your mother. 
He is an endearing, amazing friend, both the intent listener and the charismatic speaker all at once; he knows his friends like the back of his hand, can recount their life like he can count the number of moles on his face-- but you, and everyone else, know absolutely nothing about him. 
At least, close to nothing-- you know he likes ice cream and hanging out and going to the pub; you know he likes biking and doing drugs and women; you know he hates the sea and his brother and his father, but you don’t know him. All you’ve ever seen him do is smile or laugh or shout in mock anger; there is a carefully glued mask on his face he takes meticulous caution in preserving-- he is terrified to let go, despite the blasé persona he lets on.
Or maybe the mysterious matter of your bestfriend is tripping you up for no reason; maybe you’re psychoanalyzing something that doesn’t need to be psychoanalyzed, reading between lines that don’t exist. But if you were asked to answer honestly, there’s just something about Jonathan you don’t get. There is a split seam in the tapestry of his life, missing pieces in the story he pretends to tell with utmost accuracy. There are things that he never talks about, that he recoils when asked like you’ve poked a tender wound. 
“So, what were you doing before… all this?” You ask him once, laying on his messy bed in his dorm-room and scanning the water-damage constellations dotted along his popcorn ceiling. By all this you mean going to university, being the resident party boy, aimlessly pursuing a degree you’re 99% sure he picked blindfolded (culinary science) and standing here, with you, snorting a line of something on his creaky wooden desk. 
Jonathan freezes, still hunched over. “What d’you-- what d’you mean?” he says, tone breezy but, uncharacteristically tense… jilted and preoccupied. You could’ve brushed it off as him being seriously focussed on his drugs, but the way he shifts, how his shoulders curl in like he wants to disappear, tells you otherwise. 
“I mean, before going to school here… y’know, what were you like as a dumb teenager?”
You two’re twenty, barely not-teenagers, but it still makes a world of a difference: you’re living away from home, doing what you want, experiencing (a juvenile, naive version of) freedom and adulthood.
“I dunno… kind of a tool, that's f’sure,” he chuckled, rubbing his nose roughly. He’s being funny on purpose, a jester’s distraction: he doesn’t want you to realize his answers’ not really one at all. 
You shifted on his bed, now leaning against his headboard. His answer strikes you as odd and uncharacteristic despite his attempts to evade suspicion: usually, Jonathan pounces at the chance to yap on and on. “What, the great Jonathan Breech doesn’t have any wild stories to tell? No bones broken, girls dumped, houses trashed?” 
He snorted at that, like some inside joke you weren’t privy to was brought up in your words, and he descended back down on a carefully partitioned line of white. “I broke my baby finger once,” he relented vaguely when he finished, dusting off the table and licking the remains off his hand. “I cried and I cried and I cried.”
“Did it hurt that much?” you grinned, mind trailing off to imagine a baby-faced Jonathan Breech, a juvenile highschool boy, doing something silly to break that finger. Maybe he accidentally flung off his bike, broke it because of a dare, or maybe it happened just by slipping and falling. 
“It - uh… didn’t hurt enough,” Jonathan smiled, tight-lipped and paltry. All at once the air in the room had changed, like someone attached a vacuum to the window and sucked everything out. 
Your grin fell, and you watched him carefully: perhaps, had you not been as close to him as you were, he’d have let something show. A twitch in the smile, a break in the facade. But you were, and his face stayed the same, and your thoughts ran circles around themselves. This was… something else, something belonging to the part of his life he didn’t talk about. 
The atmosphere had grown tense, taut, a rubber band twisted ‘round and round, threatening to burst, so you leave the matter of his injury alone; of his life alone. You go back to staring at his ceiling, he goes back to his drugs; Jonathan collapses within himself, and you don’t notice how badly he suffocates… how suffering in silence is also accompanied by the overwhelming desire to be found.
ii.
Sometimes, despite his self-imposed distance, Jonathan lets someone look inside his head. 
You are both the sometimes and the someone; you don’t know why it’s always you, but you chalk it up to the fact that beneath his unpredictable demeanor, the murky and unreadable feelings he holds for others, is this uncharacteristic constant: he holds a softness for you. It’s what lets you know there’s something haunted lurking beneath his happy-go-lucky surface. 
You don’t know where this softness comes from, either. But you know you see it, in lingering touches, tender duchenne smiles unlike the devilish tilt his lips usually hold, how he clasps his hand around yours after a night at the pub and walks you home because he knows you get paranoid. You see it in how he comes over to your apartment when you don’t answer anyone's calls during exam season, how he remembers what your mother’s name is and what your childhood pet was and what your favorite flowers are. How his lips brush past your cheek when he pulls away from hugs, his hands shuddering around your shoulders, like he’s afraid he’ll crush you.
You only wish you could do the same. You want to sit by his side and mend his heart, lend an ear to his most mundane fears, you want to take his hand into your own and kiss it softly, return all that he has done for you, take the same as you have given to him: what is friendship if it is not equal, what is love if it is not returned? It is something broken, unable; split halves of one heart, an imbalance in the scale, Bonnie without her Clyde, a fish out of water. 
Jonathan pours his heart into your own, filling holes you know you don’t have, and you think he may be overcompensating for something else, seeing things in you that really belong to him. It is maddening, and you just want to beg and plead he lets you in. 
But you settle for the gentle pokes, the prodding, and try to decipher the vague answers he gives you. Most days, you can’t really make sense of it. 
“Sorry,” you apologize, about to leave the outing you planned with Jonathan — studying, or, trying to study, at an intimate coffeebar the two of you frequented — “my dad’s gotten drunk with his lads and my mum needs help dragging him home.”
 “Hey, hey, don’t worry. I get it: my dad used to do that all the time,” he waves your words off casually, but you don’t miss how jilted he says used to and the pain in his tone at all the time.
“Oh, surely she was fit to go to the madhouse?” you laughed once, responding to Jonathan’s complaints about an eccentric classmate in his agricultural studies. He laughs back, he always does, but this one is hollow, forced; barely stopping a grimace from coloring his tone. 
You notice these things like it’s a shadow following someone in the sun. He is lying, hiding; about something you don’t know but it is happening. It is happening, and you are so very curious: you pick up on the littlest tendrils of him, fed wholly on any information you can squeeze out. He is a mystery you want to delve within completely; answer that question of WHO ARE YOU REALLY? and leave no room for error. 
You’d give yourself to him the very same if he merely asked; you’d whisper childhood fears and tell the origin stories of faded scars on your knees and why you check under your bed before sleeping. You’d detail your entire life from sunset birth to starry night end if he even made a passing comment about knowing; you would trust your love, your heart, your entire life in his beautiful, shaky hands. This is the relationship you have built around yourselves, and it is beginning to feel terribly one-sided. 
Alas, your curiosity overwhelms him, and you take it too far, just once. Only once. 
“Where’d this come from?” you murmur, brushing your fingers over a scar above his eyebrow. It’s something you see only now, his hair mussed and wild from the various blankets and pillows on your dinky couch. 
He’s crashing at your apartment tonight, an invited event, because you often miss him like you miss home; the boy is sneaky— he slinks away like a street cat and only comes back for food. It’s only fair he lets you wrangle him back like this, making him stay by your side at least once a week.  
Your words make him freeze, like he often does; it reminds you of hikers, who freeze when they see mountain lions— he thinks if he stops and stares and pretends to disappear you’ll look the other way, drop the question, forget him completely.
But you don’t. You don’t know what’s affecting him -- not that he wants you to -- so you just stare back into his cornflower blue eyes. You stop and stare and see right through him; you hold the question like a knife to his neck, and commit him to memory. 
“The scar?” Jonathan pales, shuddering despite it having long since been healed over. The aftershocks of an earthquake. 
You simply nod, fingers pulling away. You’re still closer than ever though, the two of you being the only things in your cramped concrete apartment, the chosen movie on your telly still running and long forgotten. 
Your attention remains on him, brandished into something dangerous, like you’ll carve the answer out of him if you have to— but the moment passes. He doesn’t say anything and you accept that as the answer. Gone is your razor-sharp focus, and there is nothing more to the matter. 
But Jonathan doesn’t register this, no, he’s thinking, gears in his head turning and creaking. His tongue grazes against the backs of his teeth, jaw chattering like it was as cold as it was when… as cold as it was back then, and he doesn’t want to tell anyone— but it’s you. You’re not just anyone. 
You’re the one he holds a certain softness for. The one he equally bares his heart to and holds the most secrets from. The one he’s most terrified to know. The only one he wants to know. 
So, he decides to tell a partial truth— something digestible. People adore that which can easily slide down the gullet: news headlines don’t detail the goriness of a murder, they give the “insider” scoop of the scared neighbor. To be able to digest information is what makes the world go round, and he does not think you could digest the full truth-- he does not think he wants you to. 
He feels ill at the thought of anything between you changing— oh, how ruined he’d feel if you began treating him like fucking glass.
This abhorrent social pressure is what makes Jonathan grit this sentence through his teeth: “I got into a car accident,” he gulps dry, “when I was nineteen. Was drunk… went fer a spin. I skidded off a -- um, an empty highway. The tall sorts; high up, y’know. Fell.”
His voice makes you look back up at him, and your eyes are beautiful and tense— it breaks his heart. He knows you’re probably thinking it was in-character, how expected that is of Jonathan Breech, how you’ll easily take this partial truth, how you’ll never know the full one until it comes in a letter under your door and he’s long gone. 
“Tell me,” you ask him, lips falling into a near-frown instead of laughing or grinning wider. It’s hushed, whispered like a secret, “What did it feel like? Falling, I mean.”
Jonathan licks his lips, bores his shaking gaze into your own, and tells you not everything feels like something else. That the word connotes all you need to know. Falling meant he was falling; his arms raised and the air took him and that was it. 
It makes your brows twist and your lips press into a thin line: his nonchalance is worrying, no more his signature characteristic— there is something wrong about this apathy toward injury, toward the potential death. 
“Is that how you broke your finger?” You murmur, and it startles him. How you pieced the two things together, how you weaved a web from what little you knew about him; how futile his attempts to hide could be.
“What?” he responds, hoarse. There is a lurking shadow in his bones telling him he’ll taint you, telling him to be ashamed, telling him how badly you will never be his. It is such a damning reality, that no matter how much he may yearn for you, he is too incomplete to meet your needs; he is too hurt not to hurt you too. 
“The car accident. Is that how you broke your pinkie?” you repeat, and you gripped his hand resting at your side, bringing it up to present the finger to him like he forgot where his pinkie was. 
Jonathan’s gaze darts from you to the finger, and he feels his insides quiver; so badly does he want to spill his entire soul to you. But that internal reminder -- hurt people hurt people hurt people -- makes him settle for nodding, parted lips locking closed. 
Nothing special happens that night, no shocking revelation or bombarded confession; Jonathan nods, keeps his lips sealed, and gets up from the couch, figure dreary and fatigued. He murmurs an incomplete excuse, something half-baked and blatantly unconvincing that he has to leave, and you let him go. You think you’re imagining the shudder in his shoulders, the shake in his voice as he says goodbye, and you let him go. 
It’s there, like that club so long ago, you discover another thing about Jonathan Breech: push too far and he shuts down, closes shop and puts up his guard forever. It’s the mere fact of how attentive you are to his words; you remember how he broke his finger, and he realizes he cannot hide from you any longer. 
You’re reaching a point in your friendship -- your relationship, no matter platonic or romantic for all lines have been crossed; nobody is so raw to one another with love not involved -- where you’ll bare your hearts on your sleeves, share your every thought and dream and fear. But Jonathan won’t be able to reciprocate, and the very thought of rejecting you, betraying you, makes his stomach twist in knots. That crestfallen face of yours would haunt him for all time, your every melancholy feature burning into his memory like the scars left by cigarettes on skin.
So he leaves, hurt people hurt people hurt people echoes in his ears all the way home; he turns into an alleyway shortcut and prays death swoops down and takes him right there. He leaves his consciousness curled lovingly in your arms; his shell walks home and prays you’re none the wiser. But you’ve already reached that point in your relationship; you already know. 
When people die, or friendships do, sometimes they end with just a goodbye, a mild, casual goodbye because you think there’ll be dozens, hundreds more-- but there won’t be. Suddenly, alone in that cramped apartment, the buzzing from the tv filling your ears, your couch still warm from someone long gone, you know.
You know you startled him, that he’s left your apartment and he’ll never come back. Your heart cools, and she whispers that you took it too far, that you crossed a line you were never made aware of, that when you see him in class tomorrow he might not sit next to you, he might not talk to you, that you might lose him forever because he is too stubborn to open up and you are too stubborn to let him go. 
Well, you were too stubborn to let him go. 
It’s three weeks before you speak to Jonathan again. Three long, dragging weeks, moments in time where he avoided your gaze, evaded your presence, slipped past you before you got too close. You certainly try, of course— you seek him out every chance you get, trying to get an I’m sorry, please talk to me out before he runs off, but it’s virtually impossible.
Once, after class, you’d caught him in the middle of a flurry of exiting students by the velvet blazer, your hands curled around the lapel. “Jonathan,” you panted, trying to drag him off to the side to escape the bustling activity around you, “please, we need to talk--“
But then Jonathan had faced you, eyes widened and spooked like he’d seen a ghost, a never-before-seen-by-you fear covering his gracefully cut features, before he tugged off the black blazer and escaped into the crowd. He had seen you, widened his eyes, left. Such a simple action tore your heart in two; it had confirmed your suspicions— you’d gone too far, he was never coming back, and you were all alone. There you stood, fingers wrapped around one of his favorite articles of clothing starkly without its beloved owner, completely alone. 
In three measly weeks, he has put up a biting winter of distance between you two. 
Your feelings are unable to comprehend themselves— they fight and sob and run circles around your mind, they make you doubt, crumble, devour yourself from the inside out; they make you ask yourself what you can do to salvage this, what can you do to fix this? What is there to make of him, of his behavior; what do you do with yourself and this guilt?
If you could imagine time was a construct, you were certain you could convince yourself this stretch of time was nothing… propel yourself into a present where Jonathan does not afflict your mind, take over your every thought— does not ruin you like so. If only you could do that, you could close your eyes and reopen them when you’ve let go. But you were always too stubborn to let him go, weren’t you?
It’s three weeks to the day before you speak to Jonathan again, and it happens through the crack of his dorm door, your arm wedged through it because you know he is not cruel; he will let you in without a doubt.  
“Please,” you plead to Jonathan, “just— I just want to talk. Please?”
He stares at you straight, expression cold and reserved, before he breaks and pulls away; bites his lip, lets you in his room, doesn’t look you in the eye. Looking around, you sense something in his dorm has changed; it had gained a bereft quality, like it was attuned to Jonathan’s state of mind and felt depressed beyond your comprehension. There was a cold air to the place, an utmost frigid demeanor to a room incredibly warm just weeks prior. In your absence, the dorm had been neglected, gutted, abandoned. 
“I’m sorry,” are the first words that tumble out of your mouth. “I- I know you don’t like… talking about -- about your life before here, and I’m sorry. But please, Jonathan, just talk to me. Tell me what I can do to make it up to you.”
He sits down on the edge of his weak bedframe, pulling his knees up and pressing his face into them. “You don’t need to-- don’t… don’t apologize. You don’t need t’make it better, either. All’s grand.” he promises, words muffled and shaky. It’s a weeping kind of tone; you could just as easily imagine him sobbing with that voice. 
Your brows knit. Your emotions are wavering, treading brutally between disbelief, despair and rancor. “Then -- then why?”
“Why what?”
“Why did you avoid me? Why did you - why did we spend these last three weeks playing cat and mouse, if you weren’t mad at me? Is this your sick idea of a joke?”
“No! I-- jesus christ,” Jonathan looked up from his hands before immediately pressing two fingers between his eyes, “I wasn’t … avoiding you.”
“I haven’t seen you in weeks!” you point out painfully, exasperated. “You know, you’ve been avoiding me for longer than this. You— you push me away any chance you get. You’re afraid. I don’t know of what, but you’re- so fucking secretive, and it’s tearing me apart.”
“I’m not - afraid of anything. I’m just a private person— you know this. Would you, if I ‘pushed you away?!’” 
At his denying deflection, something within you snaps: “Why won’t you - fucking let me in? I’ve — I’ve bared my soul to you; you know me from the inside out. I trust you with my life— why, why can’t you do the same?”
“I didn’t ask you to do that! And I didn’t — I didn’t mean t’get so close to you, okay?!” He bursts, and you flinch. His hands shakily come up to his face once more; he wipes roughly but it’s no use— you’ve already seen his delicate tears threatening to spill, and it burns more holes in your heart than you thought his suffering would.
“What are you talking about?” you pry, now without any cautious reservations about his demeanor.
“I didn’t mean to get so fucking attached, because - ‘cause I…” Jonathan’s hands clenched into fists at his sides, “fuck.”
“What?” you repeat, but it’s softer, concerned; how quickly his body language shifted from irritated to terrified has you scrambling to support him. “Talk to me,” you ask, taking nervous steps closer, like you were approaching a wounded animal.
He sucks in a sharp breath, and holds it, like he did cigarette smoke, before exhaling heavily. “Okay- okay. When I was - nineteen, I drove a car… I drove off a cliff and tried t’kill myself. I was-- admitted to a psychiatric hospital for a year, and when I got out I moved here f’school. I- I… promised m’self I wouldn’t let anyone get too close.”
The confession hangs in the air, a lonely little thing; it’s a bleeding piece of his own heart he’s plucked and placed in your palms. He shudders, and you want to nurture it like nothing else. This is a culmination of a year’s worth of evasion coming to a close; you’re seeing him completely, rawly, for the first time.
“But- but why? You don’t have to— Jonathan, you don’t need to do that just because you - you… y’know.”
“I’m- I know that,” he starts brashly, defensively. “It’s b’cause I am very, very aware of my - of m’own self destructiveness…” His words taper off into something of grief; the Sisyphean struggle of wanting to live, while that depressive boulder pushes him back, colors him completely. “I just… I didn’t want to - t’hurt anyone in case I -- in case next time I succeeded.”
“Next time?” you repeat, and your voice broke in a way you wish was less vulnerable, less blatantly miserable.
“This is why I didn’t want to—“ Jonathan sighs, deflates, “I’m not telling you this because I want you to - t’fucking save me, okay? I’m telling you this because you wanted to know, and I couldn’t hide from you anymore. Because you asked.”
“You didn’t need t’hide it in the first place!” you exclaimed, coming closer to him. “You’ve never had to hide a fucking ‘ting from me.”
“You wouldn’t have understood!” He said back, volume nearing a shout. “You’ll treat me differently now, you see, you’ll look at me fuckin’ different—“
It made your heart sink-- how sure his words were, how certain he was of your rejection. How little trust did he have in you? 
(You remember he wanted to sink, too-- lose himself in the baby blue sea; let it swallow him whole and never be seen again.)
“You - you really think I’ll treat y’differently because of this? You know my every crevice, my every thought-- I have never once doubted that you’ll accept me.”
“I-I… why should I - expect any of this to stay the same?”
Suddenly, you took his face into your hands. “Because I-- I fucking love you, okay? And it’s not just friendly, or romantic, even if it’s both— I’m… I love you like nothing I’ve ever loved before. I accept and adore your every skill and flaw and antic; you wormed your way into my heart and I want to worm my way into yours.”
“That doesn’t mean—“ Jonathan tried to interject, a noise all utter disbelief. You cut him off, though, continuing your sudden confession; you hadn’t been privy to these own romantic feelings of yours till moments prior, but everything being said just felt right. 
“Jonathan, I don’t care if you drove a car off a cliff or cyanide-poisoned our professor or blew something up, because I love you. You, with all your problems and great, big, beautiful life. All I want is for you to want that life; I want you to want me in it. I feel it in my bones that I’m meant to love you; you are meant to be my home, you are everything I am supposed to know. It won’t fix you or fix anything at all but I just need you to know-- I need you to know the why to my every action. It’s because I love you.”
He looked up at you, wide-eyed, head resting in your gentle hold. “I - don’t know what to say… are you - for real?”
“As real as can be,” you smiled back at him, tracing circles along his smooth skin; you could’ve drank in that attentive stare of his for hours upon hours. “I love you, and nothing and no-one, not even you, can change that.” An aching grip had clenched around your heart at his words, that blatant disbelief: are you for real? God, had you ever been-- had you ever fucking been. 
Jonathan’s mouth opened to speak, but instead, he let out an agonizing sort of cry; an exclamation of utter surprise at the loving acceptance. Then, he hesitantly leaned into your touch, as if he’d never hugged before, wrapping his arms around your waist to snatch you as close to him as possible. He held you tighter and tighter as the seconds went by, like this was all a mocking dream his yearning mind had made up; that if he closed his eyes now he’d wake up desolate, alone, without you for eternity. His worst nightmare. 
“…God, I’m so - fucking stupid,” he grumbled, sounding angry, but you could feel vulnerable, hot tears soaking into the fabric of your shirt. “To assume you, of all people, would act that way… you of all people.” He said that tenderly; you of all people certainly meant miles more things you weren’t explicitly aware of, but you still felt the sentiment. “I’m not -- poetic or anything like that… but I love you, too.”
You chuckled a beautiful, wet laugh. “You don’t hafta’ say anything sweet or special. You’re everything to me.”
He squeezed his eyes shut, before wrapping his fingers around your wrist and pulling you onto the mattress with him. He flipped you beneath him, and held himself up by the forearms laying on either side of your head. “Fuck, I love you. I love you.” Jonathan repeated the words several more times, strange and foreign but right at home being said to you. Like his mouth was made to only ever say I love you to you. 
Suddenly, you pressed your lips to his, shutting him up momentarily. You could still feel the vibrations of I love you rumbling in his throat as you kissed him. Your tongues danced along one another, an all consuming waltz; you wanted to know everything about him, down to the taste of his tongue, memorize how sweet his mouth felt on yours. Oh, how you longed for this moment; how could you ever think about love again, and yearn for it, without thinking of Jonathan?
You reckoned that’s what this had been the whole time; your love started as a little flame, something under the guise of friendship, but the two of you had fanned it, nurtured it-- all of a sudden the miniature warmth of platonic love burst into a raging, adoring fire. You’d fed this flame with tenderness, and it responded in kind; you could never again look at Jonathan without a certain intimate reverie. Perhaps that’d been why Jonathan found it so hard to cut off this relationship as he had dozens others: something primal and unconscious within him had begged him not to let you go— some higher being knew his home was only ever in your arms. 
Jonathan deepened the kiss hungrily, pressing his weight onto you and pushing you into the mattress. Your head was spinning from the lack of air, and one of your hands had to sneak beneath his hat and tug at his hair to get him to stop. “Hey,” you panted, looking worriedly into his eyes, “what’s up?”
“Sorry,” he apologized sheepishly, hanging his head lowly for a moment before meeting your gaze once more, batting his long lashes. “Jus’ missed you. Thas’ all.”
“Missed y’too,” you murmured, pulling him back down to kiss you again. Your hands left the crown of his head and trailed down his backside, tracing over the curves and bumps of his frumpy yellow v-neck sweater. 
That touch of yours seemed to spur him on even more, and his kisses began to travel; along your jaw, to your pulse, down the long ravine of your neck, tongue darting out to lick the hollow of your collarbone, making you squeal. He chuckled against your skin, a genuine amusement rather than the mocking one you two so frequently practiced, and it all went downhill from there. His hands skillfully tugged off your tank top, knee between your clenched thighs, more teasing kisses being planted along your now bare -- save for your bra -- chest.
You didn’t mean to come over, profess your love and suddenly jump into a steamy, yearning makeout session (which, you were pretty sure was venturing off into sex…) but you supposed that apologizing— arguing, whatever —meant your relationship went back on track to wherever it was heading… which may have been set to end with an ardor romance anyway. This love of yours would’ve bursted at the seams of friendship; it could not be confined by such mere things as labels. 
“Fuck,” you groaned, arching into his teasing kisses along the peaks of your breasts, his hands ghosting around your clothed chest but never touching. “Please, Jon.”
You could feel his cheeky grin on your skin, “Tell me what you want, love.”
“…Take this off,” you demanded gently, referring to Jonathan’s sweater.
“Your wish is my command.” he snickered, obliging and removing the yellow knit-- as well as his white undershirt and pajama bottoms. He was left in a pair of boxer-shorts and that silly, silly winter-trapper hat, his fingers sneaking up to your supple thighs and tickling the edges of your jean-shorts; a silent plea. 
“Eager,” you mumbled, noticing his over-compliance in completely stripping, smiling and guiding his hands to the waistband of your shorts to tug the tight article off. 
When he did so, you shivered, both at the feeling of being only in your underwear, as well as Jonathan’s sharp, attentive gaze. “You’re so beautiful,” he panted, eyes exploring your every sweet feature. 
He was enamored with your bare body, not in a sexual way despite the blatantly sexual situation, but rather in a worshiping, religiously devoted way. It may’ve been blasphemous to think so, but Jonathan’s sudden chaste kisses along the curve of waist only seemed to prove you right; his mouth on you was gentle, like he’d held you before, except now without any guilt or hesitation. It was a holy way of loving you; something all-consuming, becoming the epicenter of a life, becoming the purpose, motivation, and belief all at once. 
That familiar broiling in your gut occurred as he made his way closer to the pulsing, lace-covered place between your legs; your hands were gripping the sheets tightly in pure anticipation, his hot breath on your sensitive skin. “Don’t be such a tease,” you pouted, legs fumbling for purchase along his body, trying to pull him closer to you.
“We’ve got all the time in the world,” he hummed, but his fingers still curled into the band of your baby-blue panties and dragged them down in one desperate go, “but I do wanna taste you….”
Jonathan’s veiny hands pried your quivering thighs apart, murmuring an offhand already stole y’panties, don’t get all shy on me now when you whimpered flusteredly, before he descended on your dripping lips, licking a flat-tongued stripe up to your clit. 
You gasped at the sudden action, but it quickly morphed into a choked moan when he pressed himself further and parted your lips, nose to your pelvic bone; he made quick work of you, artfully curling his long tongue into your hole and slurping your slick. 
“So sweet,” he praised, the vibrations of his voice making your thighs clench around his head. He hummed in amusement at your reaction, lapping you up quicker; he kitten-licked and slobbered, feeding on your sticky cunt, tongue darting in every direction, feeling your walls and prying deeper into your hot hole, which ached for the cock straining against the mattress now. The bottom half of Jonathan’s face was now positively soaked, glistening with his own drool and your needy wetness, all of it mixing dirtily and sliding down the length of his neck. 
“Jon!” you mewled, hands tearing off his trapper hat and flinging it elsewhere before curling your hands into his mousy brown hair and pushing his face deeper into your pussy, desperate to come. You were riding his face now — or, attempting to, more accurately bucking up into him — adoring his unceasing ministrations. He was basically fucking you with his tongue, overstimulating your clit with teasing licks then pulling away, feeling along the ridges of your walls.
“Pick m’hat up later, love,” he tutted, pulling away slightly to see where you’d haphazardly thrown it, and your desperate whine neared a sob. He breathed in sharply, taking in how quickly he’d undone you: in a matter of minutes, your expression had grown wanton, eyes blown out, drooling, hair askew, bra riding up your tits and revealing your sweet, puffy nipples. 
Jonathan quickly forgot about the state of his beloved hat, and went back down on you, mouth devouring in full force once again. You rolled your hips forward, and when he pulled his tongue out of your wet hole to suckle softly on your fleshy nub, your eyes rolled back into your head and your legs shook around his face, toes curling tightly. A choked moan left you alongside the sudden climax, sounding a hundred percent pornographic and all for him. 
You panted, silent and unmoving for a moment, and Jonathan began moving to get up and let you take a breather before continuing, absolutely terrified to push you too far or do anything you didn’t want to do— he was the spontaneous one, and you were the responsible one, but that didn’t mean he ever wanted to force anything upon you. His simultaneous decisions were made mostly in part with your interests in mind; he made the decisions you were too nervous and over-thinking to choose quicker. 
However, you took a long breath, then trailed your hand over the painfully noticeable bulge within his soft boxers. “Wan’… make you feel good,” you murmured, flattening your hand against his erection. 
Jonathan inhaled sharply, pitifully affected by the minor touch but holding back with an incredible amount of self restraint. “I can wait,” he offered sweetly, one of his hands coming up to your flattened hand’s forearm to rub the skin. 
You shook your head foggily, cupping him through the fabric, slowly adding friction by sliding your hand up and down. 
“S-shit,” he bit his lip, “you want this now, baby?”
You nodded vehemently with a whimper, and to make more of a point, you reached behind and unclasped your bra, tossing it elsewhere on his dirty dorm floor, before beginning to slip off his underwear. 
The hand on your arm stopped you, though, in favor of doing it himself and pressing his weight further onto you, your chests flush with one another. You were only able to take in thin breaths, making your head spin, but it also amplified the  arousal blooming in your cunt when Jonathan slotted himself at your soaking entrance, collecting his saliva and your slick on his tip. 
Before he pushed in, however, his head dipped into the hollow of your neck, plush lips brushing past the shell of your ear. “Is this okay?” he murmured, pressing a wet kiss to your temple. 
“Please,” you whined, hands pushing flat on his back to bring him closer to you.
With that, Jonathan slowly buried his length within your cunt, making your breath hitch. “I love you,” he groaned, entering you inch by inch, relishing how your warmth swallowed him whole. “Fuck, I love you so much.”
Your hole was stuffed beyond belief, but Jonathan was gentle with you, caressing your waist with the rough pads of his fingers and massaging you, trying to ease his entrance into something painless. Obviously, with that length and thickness it couldn’t be painless at all, but his attempts helped your mind drift off elsewhere and take some of the attention off the stinging stretch. 
After a long moment of ragged breathing, Jonathan cooing words of praise into your neck as he kissed you without moving, you dug your fingers into the skin of his back: “More,” you choked out, the fullness in your cunt now feeling delicious rather than cringeworthy. 
He smirked against your skin, “Looks like you’re t’eager one now.”
“Oh, get on with it,” you rasped and he let out a low chuckle, sliding out of your hole before thrusting back in. That first movement already made your hips jerk up into him, back arching. It was like all the warmth in your body had collected in your cunt, leaving you freezing from the tips of your toes to the top of your head, but still with a needy, burning fire in your insides. 
Jonathan’s pace was affectionate and rhythmic: you could feel the tenderness in his each and every gentle roll of the hips. It made you feel like the sun, how attentive he was, but he was also so fucking slow. If anything, that had your walls clenching onto him harder than if he hammered into you— that slow build-up of friction was dizzying. You squirmed, cunt clenching and contracting around his smooth thrusts— you wanted to take him within you completely, cause more friction for you were going stir-crazy with this lazy speed. 
“F-fuck! Faster, please,” you cried out, unable to take his sensual movements any longer. Your legs were twitching with his patient movements, and you could’ve sworn you saw a cheeky grin on his lips. The bastard— even in sex was he teasing you, wanting to torture you until you gave in to the pleasure and begged him to ruin you.  
Sure, this was your first time together, and was going extremely pleasantly and sweetly, but you were actually pretty fond of the idea of letting him pound into you like there was no tomorrow… 
At the lewd thought, your walls pulsed around his cock, making him buck up unintentionally, hitting that sweet spot within you. He grunted at the feeling of your tightened cunt, while you cried out his name, pleasure running like a current through your body. Your face was on fire, reminiscent of a raging fever, and your insides were coiling— god, how did his cock just feel so perfect within you?
“Oh,” he grinned in a pant, “found y’spot, didn’t I?”
Jonathan didn’t give you a chance to speak before he pulled out so far his tip was the only thing in your hole, before slamming back in and making your eyes roll to the back of your head. Props to him-- he hit your g-spot with utmost accuracy, and you let out a long, stuttered mewl, scratching at his freckled back, legs twitching. Your wail was almost catatonic, loud and cock-drunk, dripping unabashed, filthy pleasure. 
“Makin’ such sweet noises f’me,” he praised huskily, hair sticking to the sweat on his forehead, “fuck, ‘ve gotta hear that again.”
He must’ve noticed your neediness earlier, when he was slow and languid, for the new speed he set was double- no, triple that: his hips were snapping against yours, balls smacking filthily against your lips, left hand pinning your hips down and letting him sink into you faster. Shocks of pleasure tore through you at the sudden increase in speed- he’d inured you so well to the torturously slow pace from earlier that this new frenzied one felt like getting hit by a bullet train. You were overstimulated and needing more of him all at once, practically vibrating with need under his touch. 
“I’ve- hnngh- wanted this…” you gasped between moans, “f-for so long…”
“Wanted m’cock?” Jonathan questioned in a hiss, feeling with his every inch how your walls absolutely soaked him. His tone was, obviously, sarcastic, but it still made you feel incredibly lewd. 
You shook your head numbly, “Wanted you… I love you, Jon!”
“So fuckin’ beautiful,” he purred, fucking you faster and making you writhe beneath him, “love you s’much.”
Jonathan targeted the spongy, swollen spot deep within your cunt, suddenly filled with a renewed vigor and motivation to make you come as quickly as possible, and he pounded into that one, specific spot, watching how you twitched and squirmed, heavy moans exiting you. He was relentless, hands reaching to hook under your knees and spread you wider. 
At the new angle, his cock penetrated you even deeper, fuller, which you thought wasn’t possible with how goddamn full you already felt, but when his thick cockhead brushed up against your cervix you thought you were going to burst. Then, one of his hands came up to your tits to knead the flesh, and you squeaked when he tweaked your soft nipples. He was pawing at your sweet tits, fondling you in a needy, boyish way, like yours were the first pair of boobs he’d ever felt. 
“M’close!” you gasped, mind going fuzzy with pure ecstacy. Your skin prickled with goosebumps, cold  sweat running down your spine, a terribly stark in contrast feeling to the warmth buzzing under your skin. 
“C-can’t last much longer either,” he choked, still pumping in and out of your sticky hole and savoring the feeling of your tight warmness on his long length. He looked absolutely exquisite above you, and you lost yourself in the ethereal picture. Maybe you were in love, or maybe he really was just an empyrean beauty; you took in the sight of his focussed iceberg blue eyes, the cute flush spreading along his pale cheeks and bare chest, how he bit his pink lips to muffle his needy grunts and moans. 
Then, you mewled and convulsed around him, your walls spasming and contracting as you came undone, reaching the precipice of your pleasure. That made him fall off the edge— you had tensed all over- all over, and Jonathan couldn’t help how his hips stuttered, knees buckled, cock twitched; he only gave one last, powerful thrust into you before spilling himself inside of you. He painted your soft walls white, and you felt that familiar heat spreading within you; you welcomed it completely, and wanted such warmth to be there forever. 
You milked him for every last drop, cunt like a vice grip, and Jonathan gave you another wet kiss, this time on your lips, and your hands wrapped around his neck, allowing you to kiss him back. Your brows knitted at the sour taste of yourself on his lips, but it just made everything feel so real— Jonathan and you had “made love”. It was a phrase you always wrinkled your nose at, feeling uncomfortable and juvenile at the intimacy it entailed, but now you understood it completely. 
“I love you,” you repeated for what felt like the hundredth time, unable to say anything else that conveyed what you felt for him. 
Honestly, you weren’t sure anything could accurately do so— you felt infinitely about him, your love touching all edges of your mind, heart and soul, filling you completely. You supposed you felt about Jonathan how the sun felt about the moon— without one, there could not be the other. 
“I love you-- too,” he responded, pausing in the middle at the aftershocks of your orgasm, which had caused you to tighten around his softening, sensitive cock for a second. 
You peered deep into his baby-blue eyes, watching the utter love that coloured them; it was like submerging yourself in a great blue ocean, except you didn’t want to come out, because you knew you wouldn’t drown in those eyes. No, you knew Jonathan would always be there to pull you out. 
Speaking of pulling out… Jonathan slipped himself out of you softly, careful not to agitate that first stretch any more than necessary, before collapsing back into your arms. The two of you tangled yourselves in a messy flurry of limbs on his cushy mattress, sweaty and breathy, something that should’ve been terribly uncomfortable but just wasn’t— you swore you could fall asleep anywhere, no matter your own state or the circumstance, as long as you were with him. 
Blearily, both your eyes began to droop, until you gave into the familiar presence of deep, dark sleep. It was a dreamless sleep for you, but you had an ever present comfort at his weight on yours, something you could feel even in unconsciousness. 
Hours later, in a brisk, shuddering early-morning that you felt all over due to Jonathan’s unruly habit of opening his window at the peak of the day’s hottest weather and forgetting to close it before cold nightfall fell, you awoke to Jonathan watching you carefully, so close you could feel his warm exhales of breath on your cheek. 
There was no goodmorning or anything like that, just pure, uninhibited being, reveling in the space you two occupied together. Like you two were the only things left in the world. 
When Jonathan noticed you woke up, he shifted, presumably to extract himself from your grip. You stopped him, though, wrapping an arm around his shoulders and bringing him closer to you.
“What did it feel like?” you asked instead, for the last time. You brushed your fingers over his scar, and, knowing exactly what you were asking, this time Jonathan doesn’t flinch away. This time, he leans into your touch: it doesn’t burn, not anymore, and he wants your tenderness to swallow him whole. 
You didn’t mean what it actually felt like, of course. You meant, what were you thinking? What have you done, and what will you do to yourself? You meant, I love you.
“It felt like,” falling; not everything feels like something else; I raised my arms and the air took me and that was it-- “it felt like… giving in. Letting my desperation find its purpose. It felt like I’d reached a point of peace… gained clarity after a long stretching, wounded moment came to an end. It felt like becoming something only meant to be talked about in past tense.”
You don’t say anything to that; you know he doesn’t want you to. There’s no need for you to hush or plead or make better, you just need to listen, and love him. He knows you accept him for everything he is, all his flaws and his strengths; he knows your love is all accepting- it veers on saintly. 
At your silence, he melts into your arms and you can finally relax; there is an admission in the action, a release, an acknowledgement -- is suffering in silence not also accompanied by the overwhelming desire to be found? -- you have found him, at last, and you will never, ever let go.
You take it too far, just once. Only once. And you let him go just once, only once; never again. 
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The love letter
So recently I found these love letters I've written from each brother towards MC and they are absolutely adorable! I completely forgot about them tbh. Turns out I've written them about a year ago but here they are.. Enjoy!
You can find more of my work here: Masterlist
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Lucifer
Hello, MC. It's me, Lucifer. And before you start wondering why I've written to you and begin questioning your past mischiefs, know that I'm not writing to you to scold you. This isn't an official written demand either. Though think about it? What if it was a demand? An official written demand for you to come to my office and sit beside me while I work when I'm covered in endless piles of paperwork. Or and official written demand for you to spend more time with me because the time apart has been getting to me and I feel anxious without you. It's needless to say that I need you. So take this as an official written demand for you to love me more. Me and me alone. Love me the way I love you. I want to occupy your heart just like you've been occupying mine. When did you even put this spell upon me I wonder? Nevertheless, come to my room. I want to show you the love I'm capable of, darling.
-Your dear Avatar of Pride, Lucifer.
Mammon
Hey there, MC it's me The Great Mammon! Of course you know it's me duh! So there has been somethin' I've been meanin' to tell ya ...How do people say this damn? So as ya might have already noticed I've been actin' little weird and been blushing quite more frequently (< I searched that word up to be sure) around you . I don't even know if I'm myself anymore. And the worst thing is that I'm thinking about you more than makin' money! But it's not like I'm in love with you nah deffo not! ... Ok fine! I-I am in l-love with ya! Ya happy? Guess I do love you more than money huh? I'm crazy 'bout ya, MC. Head over heels in love. More than I've been with anyone else. ... Well yeah that's it. All right that's done, time to get some money! Ya know me! See ya, baby!
-your Great Mammon <3
Leviathan
Hi, MC it's me Levi. How are you doing? Wanna play something? Or even maybe hang out for a bit? We could talk or s-snuggle up together while watching your favourite anime. Anything you would like it would be my pleasure to do! ... Uhh it's like recently I've been craving to hang out with you and get to know you as well as constantly play games with you. It's like a certain urge of doing so. Could it be something similar to the connection between Henry and the lord of Shadow in The Tale of the Seven Lords? But they are just close friends. Something like ... I believe they call it "partners in crime". But what I feel for you is quite different. Maybe something like the relationship between Ruri-chan and her lover. Yes differently something like that. But that puts it as if I've fallen for you. Could it be? C-Could I b-be in l-l-love with you? And if I am, does that still make me an otaku? Answer this for me Ok? See you... Love?
-Your player number 1, Levi <3
Satan
Hi, MC. You know... it's been quite some time since we last hung out together. Wanna come read with me in the library or stop at this new cat café? I could pet your head and stroke your hair like the little kitten you are to me. I could read you endless stories of fortune and love as well as spoil you until every single desire of yours is fulfilled. Let me help you indulge in a world of fantasy and passion, showing you every side of myself that you haven't seen. Every emotion I feel when I am lost in your eyes or hidden within your embrace. A world of true ecstasy and love I know you've been craving to see. Let me take you to the unbelievable debts of my heart which is spoiled from the love that's been sitting there long enough. And now that love has a name. "MC". I love you, kitten.
-your wrath-cat, Satan
Asmodeus
Hey hey heyyyyy, MC!!! Yesterday I bought a new nail polish and I'm sure it will look absolutelyyyy adorableee on you!!! Let's try it out together, m'kay? We can match! Oh just imagine the look on Mammon's face when he sees us matching! He will pull up that pouty face that I so love! Anywayyyssss.. afterwards we can take a bath together with your favourite bath salts! Let's look fabulous together, MC! Though you may not manage to look more beautiful than me but you can always be second! Actually... MC, in my heart you are the first. People may be all over me and I do show love to each of them but the most sincere love I feel is for you. I love you, my adorable, fluffy, little sheep! And this love is a lot different than the love for my followers. I love you as my partner. So what do you say to the offer? You become my partner and I become only yours? Sufficient enough? Bye bye, hon!
-Yours truly, Asmo <3
Beelzebub
Hello, MC. Are you hungry? Let's go to Hell's kitchen. Me and Belphie were planning on going to eat Devil sandwiches there but he fell asleep. Though I was going to invite you to come with us anyway I'd love to go with you alone. We could make it a lunch date at Hell's kitchen. But MC, you need to know that as hungry as I have been recently food has not been enough. Well it has never been enough but I feel even more hungry. Hungry... Hmm though am I hungry for food? Or maybe I'm hungry for your love and affection. And this hunger is stronger than the regular one, MC. Sometimes I wonder if it's even a hunger or a need for you. And it never goes away. The only time it subsides is when I'm with you. Which indicates that we have to spend more time together to fulfil my hunger. Will you stay with me, MC? Let's meet up in the kitchen so I could show you the depths of my hunger. I love you, muffin.
-Your cinnamon roll glutton, Beel
Belphegor
MC, hi. How have you been doing? Beel mentioned that when he was going to the kitchen yesterday for his midnight snack he heard you, Mammon and Levi playing games together. My point is... MC do you sleep enough? I can't imagine a world without sleep. If it was forbidden to sleep I would gladly go and die. But... That was before. Now.. I feel like if sleep was really forbidden I could manage with you around. You've made a change in me, MC. I can't say I don't like it though. I feel more productive even if I take constant naps. You make me feel this way. It's like.. I feel loved. Though it's a different kind of love than what my brothers and I share. It's more.. passionate. It's more deep. It's constantly making me tired but when I go to bed I can't fall asleep if I don't hear your voice or feel you cuddled up against me. So let me say this: I love you. Will you be my body pillow next time, my cuddle bug-... Zzz..
-Your sleepy boy, Belphie. Zzz
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Love Story 💗 | Loki Headcanon
Link to my Marvel Masterlist
Requested 📨 yes/no
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Loki being in a relationship with a romance novelist would look like:
As a close friend to Tony Stark growing up with your mothers being close friends before Maria's untimely death, you were invited to most things Tony orchestrated. Parties, expos, an all that jazz. It was at an event for the Avengers that you first met Loki, brother of the Mighty Thor.
And actually, Thor was the one who introduced the two of you--despite Tony's objections--after discovering your profession and love of literature. Instantly Loki was intrigued but kept his usual demeanor of stoic and disinterest in Midgardians. Yet it diminished as you were able to keep a conversation with him, and keep it interesting, unlike the other Avengers he constantly found annoying.
Honest to God, his first impression when you revealed your profession would’ve been like, “what a naive mortal. There’s a reason what you desire of romance is mere fantasy and only found in the books you write,” and not taken your work serious compared to other literary publications.
Loki always migrated to historical fiction and the works of Shakespeare, Dante, and anything else you might find on a high schooler's summer reading list.
That opinion quickly evaporated upon the first few interactions you two had. Because you were a published author it left Loki with curiosity. Although he'd never admit it aloud, deep down he wanted to know just how your writing process worked and if the stories were inspired by real life events or something you wished to experience.
What initially was supposed to be Loki only reading your debut novel, turned into him purchasing your entire collection of works. And boy was he captivated. You're writing drew him in like a siren luring men to sea. Page after page, Loki found himself in the late hours of the night until the sun rose the next morning, nose deep into your books.
At first Loki planned to keep his enjoyment of your books secret, but then he just couldn't contain it any longer.
What surprised you, was when he started giving his feedback. Discussing his thoughts on the characters and plot. "How could she take him back after saying those things to her? Absolutely unacceptable. No matter how angry I am I'd never that to my partner." "Y/n, I really think you should give the people what they want and write a second novel to 'Seven Nights in Paris,'--In fact it should be call it something like, 'Seven Weeks in London.'
Eventually as the two of you became close and the relationship blossomed, Loki became an integral part in your writing. Both as a reviewer and a muse.
At the core the God was a romantic. The type to not only sway you with words and gestures but reaffirm your values and expectations in a partner. He listened, he communicated, goes the mile to ensure your happiness and needs are met. Whether it be taking you to a nice dinner or leaving notes with your morning coffee already made, your heart was full of love and didn't have to hear Loki say to know his was too.
Moments of your relationship with Loki paralleled in your books. You couldn't help it at times. The writer in you would get so inspired that before you knew it the love interest's dialogued mirrored words he said to you. An argument between the protagonists was awfully similar to one you two had. Poured the feelings of when you two kiss into the scenes the characters finally break the tension.
Yeah, he'd give you his famous smirk to let you know he was onto you to which you'd shrug and say, "Felt inspired." "By me, love?" "Always by you, mischief."
And so it's no surprise to Loki or anyone close to y'all when you release your anticipated novel, about a hopeless romantic writer who meets a misunderstood God from another world, on the day you two exchange vows and rings. Putting your own love story on the shelves for the world to see.
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Heyyy!! I’m so sorry about your health issues, I’ve been experiencing similar lately and they suck :( so I hope that Friday goes well for you!! I wanted to ask if u have any thoughts about toby and/or LJ, either works :)
Thank you very much!! I hope you like your rambles :)
For Toby, I have the idea in my mind that he's gotten into origami recently. It's something fun he can do to distract himself and try to be creative, and focusing on the origami helps calm down his tics, so he doesn't feel as stressed out while he's working on it. I think he probably makes different things from origami for everyone in the mansion (and he'd definitely make origami for you as well), and he buys a bunch of different colors and patterns of paper so that they can all look different. I think it would be cute if he had a little shelf in his room where he puts all of his favorites that he's made.
Adding onto that, I feel like he’s totally into friendship bracelets. Whether it’s beads or making those rainbow loom bracelets, I can absolutely see him doing that as a way to focus and destress as well, and he absolutely makes at least SEVERAL for everyone in the mansion. If you’re his partner I feel like he’d make one for you on a regular basis, and they always match his and he likes wearing them with you and it just makes him so happy. If you make him a friendship bracelet in return he will be ECSTATIC and never take it off. It’s now a permanent part of his body, you will not get it off of him.
I’m now also making it a thing that LJ is into bedazzling. Like listen okay listen, LJ can take the most over the top conflicting clownish outfit in the entire world and slay, so now imagine that outfit but covered in gems. DOUBLE slay. This man will sit there for hours talking to people or watching something just hand placing gems on his clothes and his shoes and they always turn out so nice. If you’re his partner, I feel like he’d offer to do something for you if you want him to (and he can go subtle if you’d like, he’s just That Bitch for his own stuff), but even just having you there makes the experience more enjoyable. Having you cuddled up by his side while he does it makes the experience way better.
I think his other knew this is his devotion to learning slang. Like I’ve mentioned before that sometimes he picks up on stuff but no, now he is DEVOTED to it. I don’t think he’s a tech guy but they all have to have phones for work and I think LJ got like tiktok or something JUST so he could pick up on new slang, and he will just randomly drop new slang he’s learned at the most random times. He made several people choke on their food at dinner one night by saying what the sigma. He cannot and will not be stopped. Whenever someone says they need to use the bathroom he always says go piss girl. It’s just so strange seeing this incredibly old clown man that is anything but modern saying things like this but he will not be stopped. If he’s dating you, by the way, you’re also his informant. If you learn a trend or a new thing before he does you are 100% required to explain it to him so he can start doing it. Nobody knows where he’s getting all this information but it’s you and tiktok.
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sh0tanzz · 2 months
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I think it would be great if you share your thoughts about placements as a post like venus signs, mars signs etc 🫶🏻
SHOSHO’S VENUS SUMMARIES
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reminder this is based on my own knowledge/observations of these placements, if it doesn’t completely resonate with you remember other placements, aspects and factors could change how your venus manifests itself and these are meant to be general
Aries Venus: Very affection to your face lovers. There’s emphasis on the effort and excitement of the early stages of initiating relationships which is why it’s said they love the “chase” They’re more impulsive in romance so sometimes they can start/end things VERY quickly or they’re quick when deciding if they’re attracted to/like someone or not. Sometimes if they don’t have placements to stabilize the impulsive energy they can move too fast or expect too much too early. NO aries venus making fun of your crush is NOT the easiest way to express your feelings pls. Enjoys being alone but seethes at couples post. Despite having detached feelings they definitely can be possessive. Need relationships that makes them stop and smell the roses but still feel their autonomy.
Taurus Venus: They love to provide wellness and stability in their relationships. Taurus Venus women are absolutely sweethearts omg they’re such givers and want people they love to be comfortable and taken care of. Taurus Venus being possessive is relatively true but how far they’ll take it depends on other placements/aspects. Taurus Venus is definitely hedonistic, their venus is home at the planet of pleasures. Pretty traditional in relationships (believes in roles, courting, etc) They’re also prone to prefer more steady changing relationships rather than something fast paced and overly intense. They hate when their feelings and relationships are rushed or don’t move at a natural safe pace. Taurus Venus men tend to make very reliable bfs imo unless they have placements that make them stingy/unavailable.
Gemini Venus: Their ideal types, love languages, and what they’re into can change often since they can be easily influenced by information or new things they learn/see about people and relationships. To have them interested you must have them feel intrigued/mentally stimulated. They find intelligence attractive and are the type to be into quirky nerds or people that have wittt humor. They are written off as cheaters since they like variety/versatility but imo they just lose interest quickly if they feel bored or limited, whether they cheat or not is based on their own personhood and other aspects. Their flirt game is super proficient since they have a natural way with words. They tend to crush on people that they admire for their intellect. Their types are almost always never solid unless they have placements that says otherwise.
Cancer Venus: Super sweet and romantic when they don’t have much negative tension from other placements. Similar to Taurus they can be a bit old school or have more traditional relationship ideals. They love emotional intimacy. Very sappy and need a sense of safety within all relationships. They can however get their hearts broken or disappointed because they’ll have high hopes in the people that they date/are interests in but don’t get the energy they give out returned. They can become cold and wall themselves up during times of heartbreak. For cancer venus/mars men their parents/mothers relationship can def impact how they view relationships. If they allow themselves to be vulnerable that’s how you know you got them. Very sentimental and sincere in their relationships and even somewhat emo? I think of beach dates at night when I see them.
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Leo Venus: Loves giving/receiving praises and compliments from their crushes, words of affirmation are a big love language trait. Leo venus women have solid standards imo. Wants to brighten up or bring more fun and ease into the lives of people they love, wants to serve a generous purpose to their partners. Very aware of how they feel and whether or not a relationship is satisfying them; they’re also very aware on whether or not their family or friends approve of the person they’re with. Big fans of creative impactful romantic gestures. They can sometimes view their lovers as an extension of themselves and are big on their partners being someone they can have pride in. Ngl their crushes can be celebs that are out of reach 😭. If/when they’re jealous it’s honestly..funny like omg you lost the idgaf war. HATE being embarrassed romantically.
Virgo Venus: So cautious in love but has a big desire to connect to someone. Pretty reliable or purposeful partners. Very big on the idea of pure intentions. Pretty picky or have very particular ideals for their crushes. They are lowkey attracted to people that are out the way or don’t bring too much attention on themselves. Not fond of relationship drama and extras that aren’t practical or of substance/usefulness (similar to cap venus). Gets actual butterflies in their stomach bc their anxieties go straight to their digestive 😭. They almost always have a significant relationship experience, example or idea that they model and develop relationships after. Virgo venus people lowkey have to be careful of someone taking advantage of their want to do good by their partner. Can accidentally self sabotage by their anxieties and idealisms towards relationships.
Libra Venus: Secretly strategic in their love life and pursuits like they PLOT on people. Daydreams about their crush’s face or stares at posts of it. Pretty accommodating in relationships. Needs a sense of reciprocation. Romantic in the ways that you see in the media, like if they could live in a romcom they would. They -love- love and the feeling of admiring someone. Can be very fickle with their interest however. Libra Venus girls who are interested in men DEF love pretty boys. Similar to cancer venus they can also be let down when the energy isn’t matched. Their ideal types are pretty open or versatile but they’re still into attractive/photogenic people (placements can affect this). However they hate a pretty face without a personality or talents. SOOO susceptible to falling into situationships or relationships without solid titles pls BE CAREFULL WITH THAT.
Scorpio Venus: Very intentional lovers. Secretly attracted to the loser bf trope 😭. Has very all or nothing views on relationships. Tries to be in control of how their crush perceives them. Needs honesty and transparency from their partner to function in relationships. Very intuitive partners !!Highly observant of the people they love. Stalks their crushes socials tbh. People think they’re all sexual deviants but tbh no a lot of them are highly protective of their intimacy. Desperately needs someone to match their freak, not sexually !! so hard for them to find someone who wants the same things as them. Some scorpio venus men like being ordered/told what to do . Can be prone/susceptible to relationships that are tumultuous or has extremes and can have a power imbalance within it. Sometimes into people who aren’t obvious in their interest towards them.
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Sag Venus: Chronically looking for Mr/Mrs.right 🙂‍↕️. Can’t stand relationships with extreme power imbalances. Let’s their s/o do ANYTHINGGG like genuine favoritism towards their spouses 😭. They try to not allow their feelings to become too complicated. Are actually ok with being single for a while. Attracted to people who are devoted to something whether it is a cause, morals, set of principles, hobby, lifestyle, or religion. Also people with diff backgrounds, cultures and povs. Very comfortable in their sexuality also a lot of sag venus people are…fruity LOL. Hard for them to be mad at their lovers for a long time I’ve noticed ? SOMETIMES they can be hypocritical in relationships 😭. Very generous lovers both the men and women. If not interested in foreigners they’re very into people who have major experience within life that can teach them something.
Capricorn Venus: Why are we the love police like actually LMFAOO. Sacrificial and willing to endure for the people they adore. A part of us dies of embarrassment when disappointed with the people we like. Secretly geeks out abt whoever’s caught their eye in the confines of their room. Hyper realistic when it comes to love ideals. HATEs the dramatics, extras and games. Tries so hard to balance their goals with a love life. Likes people who are self sufficient. Similar to scorpio with all or nothing thinking in relationships. Will phase out of existence when the feelings get too complicated. No guys we can’t plan/imagine the future everytime we are in love with someone. Swear there’s always age difference stuff happening. You can tell how much a cap venus likes you by how much they’re willing to share/give you of anything that’s theirs. Silent pining.
Aqua Venus: Relatively unorthodox lovers. Goated at the friends to lovers trope (honestly anything to lovers). Covert hopeless romantics. Needs a relationship balance where they have time and space to themselves. Quietly protective over their spouses. Never dates or is attracted to the same type of person everytime, there’s always something distinct about them. Secretly strict lovers, yes do as you please but don’t disappoint them. Manages to know you better than anyone else. Also needs someone to match their freak. Studies the person they like so they can be an efficient partner. Hey so like no it’s not normal that everything gives you the ick. They love deep talks or someone who’s observant. Dislikes when a relationship moves too fast. Aqua venus men either hate hookup culture or loves it no in between.
Pisces Venus: If they could build a partner from scratch they would 😭. Highly accepting of their partners flaws despite that however. Loves and acknowledges even the smallest most little detail about their partners. Extremely forgiving TOO forgiving almost. Living proof that true adornment can exist. Needs to be careful of confusing admiration with romantic feelings. Can also allow themselves to be single for a pretty long time. Admires their crushes from afar. Also plots on the people they like. Will defend their s/o to the endddd of the earth if need be. Love language depends on the day, time, hour, and what song they recently listened to. Quietly goes insane when in love but tries to be chill about it (they fail). Don’t think I forgot you it’s not normal that anything can give you the ick either pisces venus !
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dead-boys-club · 2 months
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†  birds of a feather : hawks.
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❥ scenario: hawks and his winged s/o ❥ no triggers; not rated. ❥ i don't have any beta readers - you get what you get. ❥ requested! it's late - i am sorry, i'm a mess. ❥ for the sake of writing, the s/o's wings are black.
keigo having a partner that has wings is going to garner so many terrible jokes, let me just get that out of the way. in all honesty, he would be over the moon about it.
he would be fascinated, always. he likes his own wings but compared to yours? he's always full of compliments about their size and color, the way they shine in the moonlight. he would have some sense of familiarity with you, being so similar to you in ways that would be impossible with someone else. the first time he saw you, he was just.. stunned. training with you is one of his most favorite things, wanting to see just how you could use them.
this may or may not come as a surprise, but he would like the idea of having an s/o who was so capable. unlike most, he'd have no issue with someone surpassing him - he'd actually find it pretty attractive. knowing that you were fully able to handle yourself, he would have no trouble leaving when he needed to. of course, the usual safety concerns would pop into his head but he couldn't do anything about those, could he?
keigo enjoys deeply intimate moments with you. your having wings would include grooming - he's very meticulous with wing care, for both of you. he'd like helping you keep them and take the opportunity to pet over the soft feathers, grinning to himself at how it would make you shiver and squirm. it would be a very soothing process for him, a mutual way of taking care of each other that he never had before.
the rivalry would never end, though playful. both of you would trade jokes, teasing comments, etc. the amount of races you'd have were endless. most of them ending in a park or a rooftop, laughing, and pretending to be normal. like you didn't have to wake up in the morning and go risk your lives for something.
your wings would be his absolute favorite thing in the world. and, he wouldn't hesitate to say that.
✧*̥˚ nickname *̥˚✧
as the day finally came to an end, keigo was content to make it back to the apartment, wanting nothing but to unwind with you. he was greeted by the sight of you laying half in the living room, half on the balcony, wings spread out as far as you could manage, enjoying the warmth of the sun on them. it was a sight that made him pause, taking you in for a moment but your senses were just as sensitive as his own.
'evening, pretty bird,' you greeted, not even bothering to open your eyes.
he chuckled, making his way over to peer down at you, head tilted. 'hey yourself, big bird,' he mused.
raising a hand up for him to take, which he did without thought, you sat up with a small laugh. '"big bird"? that's new.'
keigo crouched down, leaning to peck your lips before straightening again. 'I think it's only fair you have a nickname, too, don't you think?' chuckling when you pulled at his shirt to get him to sit back down. he complied with ease, settling on the floor with a deep sigh, shrugging off his jacket. 'it's not as sweet, is that the problem?'
you laughed, a light sound, clearly amused with his new title for you. 'I mean, i can't argue with you on that.. but big bird? i'm not even yellow.'
watching as you moved around to crawl closer, practically falling and melting into him, he let his arms settle around your frame. 'it suits you. you've got these.. big, beautiful wings that i can't help but admire and adore.'
you couldn't do anything but shake your head, headbutting his shoulder. 'you're so weird but, if it makes you happy, i don't mind.' smiling, you looked up at him. 'it's kind of cute. i guess you can use it.'
sinking back to lay on the floor, he let his own swings spread out, taking a deep breathe. he was comfortable like that, your weight and warmth soothing the stress of the day. 'oh, i intend to. my adorable big bird.' you both knew if it was an actual problem, he would stop but he saw the smiles and flutters, knowing you enjoyed it. you were too honest to let him use something you didn't like.
your wings rested above his own, nosing into his shoulder. 'mhm, pretty bird.'
✧*̥˚ safety *̥˚✧
on a more serious note, keigo would find comfort in your wings. he's so used to his own keeping others safe that he never expected to be the one being kept safe. being wrapped up in them something new to him though deeply satisfying, letting himself sink into your embrace. you knew when he needed the comfort and provided without a word, something he would appreciate more than you knew.
keigo knows that he's allowed to be vulnerable in your hold and that's the only place he does so. he doesn't have to put on a brave face or hide how he feels about something. he can be himself and relax with you. he doesn't have to have his guard up.
the emotional bond shared between you would be something he cherished, knowing that you would be there to protect and comfort him, the same way he was for you. he often finds himself lost in thought over his luck in finding you; someone who understands him so well.
✧*̥˚ another little thing *̥˚✧
it was a rough night for keigo, the weight of the days events feeling like a cinderblock on his chest. the normal distractions to keep the gross feelings and threat of anxiety away hadn't helped, leaving him restless. he tossed and turned, eyebrows pinched as he couldn't seem to rid himself of the thoughts.
it didn't take you long to feel the movements or sense the distress beside you, a concerned frown forming as you blinked your eyes open, trying to clear your vision. 'kei?' you asked softly, reaching to lightly place your hand atop his head. 'you okay?'
most of the time, your touch, even your voice, would have done something to soothe the nerves but nothing. 'a lot on my mind,' he mumbled, sighing deeply. 'don't know why, but i can't seem to shake it tonight.'
you didn't need to say anything, knew it was probably best, and just turned to shift closer to him, spreading your wing to gently wrap around him. he didn't hesitate to turn and hide his face against your neck, sinking into the warm cocoon you created. the soft feathers against his skin and brushing against his own brought a sense of calm to settle over him. it wasn't completely taking everything away but it was doing more than anything else.
'thank you.' his voice was barely even a whisper, gradually starting to relax as he did his best to overlap and replace thoughts. your warmth earned a sigh.
holding him close, you flexed your wing against him, just wanting to hide him away from the world. 'you know i'm always here for you,' you whispered, a hand coming up to sink through his hair, 'anything you need.'
finally, he closed his eyes, even squeezing them shut for a second. he was soothed under the gentle strokes to his hair, the ghost of a smile forming when he felt the movement slowing, a sign that you were beginning to doze back off. it was okay though. he felt safe, protected from the nonsense and above all else, loved. he knew he'd struggle but at least he had you.
'grateful for that,' he answered, 'for you.'
you smiled, barely awake at that point, tipping your head enough to nose against his own, basically cradling him to your frame. 'whenever you need me, pretty bird.. i'll be right here..' you mumbled, slurring slightly, yawning against the blond locks.
wrapped up in the safety net of your wings, keigo let himself begin to drift off. the dark night began to fade into one of peace. it wasn't long before you were both asleep, wound up in each other.
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deadbydangit · 8 months
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I read your one imagine about sleeping next to the killer, can I request something similar with the ghostface, the knight, and the blight. ☆
I absolutely can. I have so many good ideas for this one that I just thought of. Please enjoy.
Sleeping with them: Ghostface, Knight, Blight
Ghostface
Oh, you think sleeping next to Danny is going to be fun?
Well you're wrong.
First off, this guy is a blanket hog.
It won't matter if you put extra blankets on yourself, he's stealing them.
And he won't even know he's doing it.
He just pulls them on himself.
Then he wakes up cover and sweat and complains about it.
You can mention the issue to him, but he knows there's not much he could do about it.
And it isn't really his fault.
So make sure to hold those blankets tight.
Second, he is super squirmy.
There are two types of people when sleeping: those who sleep peacefully and of those who kick everything around and won't say still.
Danny is definitely the second.
He's a wild sleeper, so don't be surprised when you end up being kicked in the middle of the night.
He doesn't mean to do it. It really isn't his fault.
If you mention it to him in the morning he will apologize.
He also talks in his sleep.
And it's really funny.
It makes absolutely no sense.
"It's Taco day, so I want sprinkles."
"Frogs don't have wings, they aren't people."
Sometimes he'll even be talking about you in his sleep.
Mumbling about how much he loves you.
Like he's having a conversation with someone and bragging about you.
It's really sweet. But if you mention it to him the next morning he won't remember a thing.
Despite all this, he's very cuddly.
Before you both fall asleep, he wants to be the big spoon and hold on to you.
It's his way of protecting you from anything that might harm you.
Even if there's no harm around, he just wants to hold you.
Knight
Sleeping next to Tarhos isn't as bad as sleeping next to Danny.
He isn't squirmy and doesn't kick.
He's very still and silent when he sleeps.
Occasionally, he moves slightly.
But, other than that he stays pretty still.
Overall he's a pretty good sleeping partner.
Well, except, he won't take the helmet off!
Yeah, he sleeps with it on.
And, no, he won't take it off no matter how many times you ask him to.
He claims it's 'a crucial part of his identity'.
It's also very uncomfortable to sleep near him.
Forget about hugging or spooning.
You're going to hit your head and it isn't going to feel good.
That helmet is made of metal.
Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Imagine you're sleeping and you suddenly move, then you hit your head on metal.
That's certainly one way to ruin a good night's sleep.
Oh, and he always wants to hold on to you.
He claims it's his way of protecting you.
'The realm is very dangerous, so let me protect you my love.'
You can tell him how uncomfortable it is, but he won't listen to you.
Again, it's a crucial part of his identity.
And even if you do learn to sleep through hitting your head on metal, that helmet is covered in rust and dried blood.
Now imagine waking up with all that gross dirt, grime, and blood all over you.
All over the bed sheets, all over your clothes, and worst of all, all over your face.
He's used to sleeping and dirty conditions, so it doesn't really phase him.
If you beg enough, he will clean his helmet off at the very least.
On the plus side, he's an early riser so he's usually not there when you wake up.
You have the whole bed to yourself to sleep in.
And he's very careful about not waking you up, he even tucks you in after he's gotten out of bed.
He claims he doesn't do that. But seeing how neat and tidy the tuck is, it's pretty obvious he tucks you back in.
He'll also whisper sweet words to you right before you fall asleep.
All about how amazing you are and how special you are to him.
About how he'll protect you from the world if he has to.
Blight
Arguably, one of the best sleeping partners.
You'd figure his goo would get on everything and anything.
But that isn't the case.
Actually he doesn't need to sleep.
Or, he can't anymore. He isn't really sure which.
You might feel bad for him. But he really doesn't mind not being able to sleep.
Otherwise, he knows he'll be plagued by nightmares.
But that won't stop him from making sure you have a good night's sleep.
Just because he isn't entirely human anymore and doesn't need to sleep, doesn't mean you don't have to.
His bedtime ritual for you is very luxurious and loving.
Being a scientist, he knows a lot about the human body.
He knows your sleep cycle and knows how to best get you asleep.
Routine is key. And he knows that.
Even if you aren't tired, he'll try to get you to relax around the same time every night.
He'll make sure you have plenty of blankets and are warm enough.
He can't really kiss you with his mouth as it is. So he'll make do with petting your hair very softly and soothingly.
Just that is almost enough to put anyone to sleep.
If you can't sleep, he'll first make you some tea to help you relax.
Believe me, he is an expert on making tea.
And, somehow, he never ends up getting goo in it.
If that doesn't work, he'll read you a book.
When he reads his voice is so soft and relaxing you can't help but fall asleep to it.
If none of that works, he will cuddle with you just for a little while.
He doesn't want to get you all gooey and gross.
And he does so out of love.
He just wants to make sure you feel comfortable and loved the whole night.
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