#and I always love getting to watch Inej being awesome

[whatsagirltoblogabout]

They weren't kidding when they said studying filmmaking would ruin change the viewing experience forever. I can't watch anything without a running commentary about lighting and framing and blocking and logistics and whatnot running through my mind. But I also get to appreciate all the little details that I wouldn't have noticed before. And I get to acknowledge things that might seem like an issue on the surface, and then discard them and choose to enjoy what I'm watching anyway. I like having that power.

[belle-keys]

my thoughts on shadow & bone season 2

okay, i finished late last night and had a blast watching this. we'll see if it gets canceled or not (it might). but oh my god i had so much fun even though i was like hmm at some things. here's some of my thoughts and impressions in case you would like to feel #seen.

don't @ me about dark!alina. i like it. i love it. i've always wanted a corrupt alina. i've been a darklina shipper for a hot minute and while that wouldn't have made sense to do in the show, a dark!alina does make sense and it deepens her character imo. the use of the merzost had major consequences for her and i love that. aleksander and baghra did warn her, and she didn't listen. and now we get payoff. this is how you write powerful characters!!!

paddy gibson was a great nikolai like come @ me and i will defend this man. alina’s interactions with him, tolya, and tamar were awesome like it felt very natural.

the spirit of cillian murphy possessed my man freddy carter in episode 4 like idk mans was giving me the kaz i had expected from season 1 ong he was not playing in that pekka rollins scene, like he stole so much of the show for me i loved it and i just got chills seeing the kaz we know and tolerate clearly living deep down under freddy's skin.

matthias spent the whole season in jail to simply remain in jail for the whole season and not end the season out of jail despite spending a whole season in jail despite jail being all he did for the season despite-

when aleksander was choking alina and telling her how much he wanted to destroy her and had her pressed up against that table and was muttering evil nothings into her ear? i felt that.

ben was excellent as well in this season as we expected, but as i previously noted, this entire season was identical in both fundamental and superficial ways to billy russo’s season 2 in the punisher like i can’t make this shit up. as soon as daddie darkie opened his mouth to speak, i immediately knew via osmosis what the speech’s delivery would sound like. it's just hilarious i'm sorry i'm not mad but it's just so unserious.

when zoya said "that one's a mess. i can fix him"??? i felt that shit so hard like meee finally a female character to represent meee

we did not need reminders that tolya loves poems 100 times we get it like cmon do more with your side characters if you're gonna make them quip every two seconds.

i will not lie, i’m so happy with how they incorporated the crows into the main story like it really felt like a fun epic fantasy series with different levels you gotta beat until you fight the boss (daddy darkie), like there’s so many interwoven plots and arcs and every time a scene switched i’d be like the leondardo dicaprio pointing at his tv meme i got chills watching everything come together the way it did, i think they really succeeded in making you (me) ooh and ahh this season.

the fight scenes gave me chills like the grisha powers being brought to life like that? slayed. the musical score and the special effects and the cinematography? popped off. the crows bringing guns to a grisha fight? never before seen. inej slicing up daddy darkie monsters? extraordinary. shit had me breaking out in chills.

i think besides kaz's face-off with pekka rollins in ep4, aleksander's death scene and his death monologue was the high point of the season for me. the whole "you need my darkness to balance your light thing"? the whole "let me be your monster so you don't have to" thing? literally took my breath away. he encapsulated every thing i loved about the darkling's character so well and his relationship with alina. he did warn her that she needed him for balance within herself and she just couldn't accept that. now she'll get what he was on to the whole time. it's amazing. it shows the darkling isn't just a character in alina's life.

i feel like splitting mal and alina up at the end wasn't... right? idk, the whole point of malina was supposed to be childhood friends-to-lovers-to-soulmates and her making this huge sacrifice for mal and then have him go away while she stays to... rule ravka??? that fell flat for me as an ending like what was the reason for that change cus i have no idea??? it makes sense from an irl perspective but idk what the showrunners were going for with that.

jessie mei li cannot act. i am not some tv and film expert. but this girl just cannot act. i dare you to change my mind.

oh I absolutely hate how they changed wylan and jesper's relationship. idk what was the reason for the whole "we once hooked up and forgot about each other" thing like WHAT WAS THAT HOW DID THEY MISS THE PLOT OF THE MOVIE SO BADLY IDC I CAN'T VIBE WITH IT NO-

i'm sorry on-screen kanej is still just as dry as book kanej for me like i felt nothing at all during their interactions this season, even the hallucination ones. as individuals they're great, but they made me feel absolutely nothing. not a single tingle.

if i had to cut something from the show, i'd probably either cut matthias' entire presence since he did nothing this season, or, i would cut genya and david's relationship because i do not and never did care about that pairing (or either of them as individuals tbh)

alina doing the darkling's shadow cut at the end??? i was cackling in joy like a maniac. yeah. that was a moment in time.

[msunitedstatesjames]

 I just finished season 2 of Shadow and Bone. What a wild ride of confusion, rage, and elation, guys.

Here’s my thoughts, but first, some disclaimers. If you haven’t watched the show and read the books, major spoilers follow, so beware. Also, though I had some major problems with this season, I did enjoy it overall, so remember that as you read. And if you absolutely loved this season more than anything, that’s cool too. All opinions are welcome here.

Most of this will be about the Crows because they’re the main reason I watch.

Here’s what I loved:

1. Just like last season, the casting and character work on this show was great. For some reason, I wasn’t immediatly sold on Nikolai’s character, but then I loved him to pieces shortly, which I guess is how it’s supposed to be anyway. Also, Wylan was perfect. Double also, I appreciate that this show continues to make Mal actually likeable, which was not always the case in the books. 

2. The visual effects were really cool. We’ve all seen a lot of different shows where characters have elemental magic, and rarely have I seen it look good in live action. But some of those scenes with the amplified grisha at the end made me think, “This is how a person wielding a whirlpool and/or ice shards might actually look if it could happen in the real world.”

3. The David/Genya dynamic was amazing. They were cute in the books, but I think TV David comes across even better. But it’s been years since I read the Shadow and Bone trilogy, so I could just be misremembering there. (Also, pretty much every romantic dynamic has you invested in this show.)

4. The moment at the end when Kaz and Inej see each other safe for the first time after the big battle, and then Jesper runs over and hugs her, while Kaz just has to look away in disappointement with himself. (Also, the final Kaz/Inej scene was very well done.) I always thought these two were the strongest characters in a group of very strong characters in the Crows books, and the show does their characters a lot of justice, even if I’m often left wanting a little more.

5. The dynamic between the Crows is really starting to get to book level, and I love it. 

Things I didn’t love (these range anywhere along the scale of mild disappointment to pointless rage)

1. The Crows just showing up and destroying the amplified grisha at the end. I mean, other than the grenade they threw, those grisha had plenty of time to counter their attacks. They definitely had time to stop that powder from flying into their faces. They could clearly hear Kaz be like, “Wylan, now!” As much as I love the Crows, that scene was a little ridiculous. The Crows can cause some major destruction in the books, but usually when they do they have some more advanced technology and some shadows on their side at least. 

2. When I realized that the Kaz-Pekka Rollins confrontation was going to happen in episode four of an eight episode season, I just about lost it. In the books, that moment is the culmination of two books worth of character development and plotting. And the fact that Inej was the only Crow who wasn’t there to see it just drove me crazy. That’s such a great moment between them in the books, when Inej finally thinks Kaz has lost himself to his revenge, after two books of telling him he’s not a monster, and then Kaz is just like, “Nah, I was just messing with him.” Like, what a relief that was in the books. (Also, I don’t really like that Pekka Rollins is still out there being his usual self, even though he’s locked up. In the books he’s not dead either, but by the end of the story he’s pretty much been scared witless and driven away. Hopefully he and Kaz don’t meet up again in the show because it wouldn’t feel very meaningful at this point.)

3. The Inej-Mogen conflict. It’s clearly filling in for the Inej-Dunyasha conflict in Crooked Kingdom, but it lacks the dynamic that made it so interesting in the books. Dunyasha as a Lantsov pretender (or not) was awesome. Dunyasha really being almost like a foil for Inej was awesome. It also brought in the interesting concept of Dunyasha being Inej’s “shadow,” or the result of all the sins she’s had to commit to survive. Which also brought up the idea of Kaz and Pekka as shadows of one another, and we got to have that great moment where Inej really forces Kaz to think about what he plans for the future, and how he plans to be different (if really at all) from someone like Pekka Rollins if he comes out on top. Also, one of my favorite passages in Crooked Kingdom is Inej’s “we learn to wring magic from the ordinary” moment, about how maybe Dunyasha is some lost princess, while Inej is just a regular girl who’s been forced to deal with the brutal side of the world, but that Inej will fight to get what she deserves anyway. It’s so powerful, and I don’t really think they could have worked it into a TV show anyway, but it still felt like a loss. (Also, as cool as it was to see Inej wielding a legendary magical sword later in the season, it kind of makes that “wring magic from the ordinary” passage from the book ring a little hollow.)

4. The best Kaz/Inej moment in Crooked Kingdom (in my opinion) was attempted, but they couldn’t do as much with it in the show as they did in the books, simply because they weren’t there yet with the story/characters. I think they really should have put off the Kaz trying to help Inej with her first aid scene for later. It was still effective in the show and I liked what we did get. But there’s so much good dialogue and character work there in the books, other than just the romantic tension, and most of it is so wound up with Crooked Kingdom’s plot that it would be hard to transplant elsewhere, but maybe they’ll try. But this was one of the biggest issues I had with this season overall. They tried to hit on so many of the important story and character beats from Crooked Kingdom, but they could never make them hit quite as hard as they do in the books because of the constraints of time/plot decisions.

5. I was sad that we didn’t get to see Matthias join the Crows yet. 

Things I’m still hoping to see, even though they kind of already adapted Croooked Kingdom:

1. The Jesper-Kaz feud. “Who’s Jordie?” Love it. Also, I’m sure we’ll learn more about Jesper’s background, and I’m looking forward to seeing that play out somehow.

2. Kaz in a murderdous rage over Inej’s safety. I want to see this man throw another man off a light house. Judge me all you want.

[giantdogcloud]

Just some nice character details for the crows that made me incredibly happy watching the show:

Spoilers!!

• Kaz's hands not being shown without gloves on

• The whole "Have we made a deal before?" with Kaz and Pekka 👀

• When Pekka replied that he would have killed Kaz and thrown him into the harbor 👀👀

• Nina's one true love being waffles

• The very strong sibling dynamic between Jesper and Inej that's also very strong in the books

• Kaz obviously wanting to help Inej after she gets hurt, but physically not being able to

• Matthias observing a stuffed wolf's head on the wall, looking rather confused and sad, since wolves are so important to him (I thought this was an awesome detail!)

• Jesper asking for a demolitions expert!!

• Inej praying!!

• Little hints in the show to their back stories (Pekka and Kaz, Inej and her family, the Grisha asking Jesper what he is)

• Kaz 'that's the laugh' Brekker when Alina gives Inej her dagger

• Their nicknames being mentioned

• Jesper being able to fix Kaz's kane 👀

• Jesper's character as a whole :')

• Kaz always knowing when Inej is around, especially since it was shown that Jesper struggled with that

There's probably more, but I haven't read the first trilogy so I don't know those characters and these were just the ones I could think of off the top of my head

[anarmorofwords]

Hi Ana! Did you finish Shadow and Bone? What did you think of it? Favourite bits or your peast favourites?

Xxxxxxxx

Hi darling 💕 Sorry for taking so long, I had a very busy weekend.

There's no short answer to that, so buckle up! (I'll still try to keep it concise, if you want me to elaborate on something lmk!)

I binge watched it and enjoyed it a lot, but after some consideration there are quite a few things I was dissapointed by or that I feel could have been done better. I'll start with them and move to what I loved later. My biggest issues:

(Spoilers incoming!!)

Alina glowing. (I'm sorry lol, but it looked so weird!)

Zoya. Listen, I adore this girl. She's one of my favourite characters ever. And she was done so dirty here - the actress just doesn't have that spark, it was never pointed out how powerful and respected (or desired!) she is, I hated that she threw herself at Mal and the Darkling, when book!Zoya always made a point of not doing that. Implying she used to sleep with the Darkling was so so unnecessary, and it changed their dynamic uncomfortably. Also she happily went on about visiting her family in Keramzin (it was said in RoW that she did the opposite), her reaction to the Novokribirsk wasn't powerful and convincing enough to me, basically no. Not to mention her being so gentle and defeated after the Fold. Like c'mon. She should have been FURIOUS. RAGING.

The Crows seemed infantilized and Kaz specifically was not ruthless enough. He gave up too easily, and didn't seem like the feared Dirtyhands at all.

Kanej. I actually loved many things about them (later on that), but I think they went too far with the development of their relationship. It's already painfully obvious how much he cares for her and so all their great scenes from SoC won't have much sense. Also if they showed Kaz being more indifferent and ruthless, it would be more impactful to see him starting to care for Inej later, and now it won't be that big of a deal.

Helnik storyline felt very out of place among the rest of the plot.

I don't really like what they did with Jesper - Kit is awesome, and had some great moments, but they wrote him as a cliche comic relief. Also please don't kill me, but I couldn't care less about the goat. I had that awful feeling that I've seen this "joke" so many times before, and also it got repetitive quickly.

The Conductor thing made the Fold problem look kinda stupid. Like c'mon, the country is losing soldiers and money on some stupid skiffs and here's a guy who just gets through it by train, no big deal. Also how did he build the railways there.

Now for the good parts!

David Kostyk and Genya Safin. David stole the show every time he appeared, Genya was absolutely brilliant, and their interactions had me screaming. I can't wait to see their relationship develop further. Also Genya physically fighting the Conductor, yass girl.

The visuals! Every scenery was incredible. Ketterdam's atmosphere, the palace (the Darkling's war room!!!), all the cities. Same goes for costumes. Keftas 👌

Helnik. I know what I said before, but while their storyline didn't fit into this season, it was wonderful. Danielle as Nina is absolutely brilliant, I adore her. Matthias was also fantastic (when he smiled!!! oh my) I loved their banter, and the fact that they included the "not natural" dialogue 👌

Kanej things I loved: Kaz saying there's no one like Inej, her killing to save him, the quiet respect and understanding between them.

Inej. That's it, she was perfect.

Freddy was also incredible, I just don't really agree with how they wrote Kaz.

The amplifier. I could barely look at it, hated the sight. But I think it highlighted the cruelty and price of the practice well.

Inej and Zoya fighting together!!!

Malina!!

Inej stabbing the Darkling was powerful.

Ivan and Fedyor. They were adorable and I fully expect them to casually mention they're husbands in the next season.

Waffles 🥺

Sorry for making this so long, I hope you don't mind 😂 How did you like it Rua? ^^°

[trulivin]

On the Job

Golden Eyes Part 2 | Part 1

A/N: SURPRISE SURPRISE. Here it is! (Finally). One down, seven more to go. Sorry it’s taken so long, but I hope you enjoy this! As always, send feedback! Enjoy! I figured you guys would like this better than another update. I got a lot of this done last night so I did my finishing touches tonight. Hopefully I caught all of my mistakes! 

Also I’m thinking about doing a tag list for whenever I post imagines? Lemme know what you think.

P.S Let me know if the link works for Part 1. My computer is being janky right now. 

Kaz Brekker x Reader, Six of Crows

Warnings: Slight abuse, cursing 

*Hopefully my gif works this time*

Y/N went straight to Jesper after she left Kaz’s room. “Well hello there Ms. Sharpshooter,” Jesper bowed, jokingly as she approached. Y/N shot him a grin before asking, “So Kaz says you have a job to do and I was wondering if I could tag along?” Jesper thought for a moment, but the mischievous look on his face told her she was already allowed. 

“Hmm? Let’s see you could take anyone’s eyes out in a moment or shoot them in the head. I think you can,” Jesper replied. “Besides, we need someone to draw our target out anyways. And with those golden eyes of yours I think you can do it.” 

Y/N’s face faltered a bit, but she nodded refusing to let the idea of playing the seductress ruin this. “Great so I’ll come get you tomorrow and fill you in before we go,” Jesper smiled before heading off to the Crow Club. “Awesome,” Y/N muttered, sulking again. Of course it had to be this type of job, she thought to herself. 

“There’s the girl I was looking for!” Inej exclaimed, dancing gracefully over to Y/N, snapping her out of her thoughts. Y/N gave her a small smile and Inej’s face dropped. “What now?” she asked. “Nothing,” Y/N said as innocently as she could. “Bullshit,” Inej pursed her lips. “Nothing I swear! Kaz finally let me go on my first job with Jesper,” Y/N said. 

Inej narrowed her eyes and prompted, “But.” 

“But,” Y/N huffed, “Jesper said they needed someone as bait. And I’m said bait.” 

A look of sympathy flashed across Inej’s face, before she grabbed Y/N’s hands, leading her to her room so they could talk in private. 

Once the girls were settled, Inej said, “You don’t have to go you know. Kaz wouldn’t think anything of it.” But Y/N shook her head. “I have to go. I just got everyone to shut up,” Y/N said. “But Y/N, we both know you got the worst of it at the Menagerie,” Inej said quietly. Y/N sighed recalling all of the horrible memories. 

“Look,” Inej started, “I’m just saying, you don’t have to do this type of thing.” 

“I’ll have to at some point. Might as well be now. Besides I’ve practically been begging Kaz to let me go, and I told him I’d be fine. Do you know how embarrassing it would be if I went to him now and said ‘oh wait I can’t do this cause I’m afraid a guy is going to try and feel me up’?” Y/N mumbled. Inej gave her a funny look but said, “Kaz wouldn’t blame you. He’s not one of the nasty men. I mean he doesn’t have a conscience I swear, but he still has some respect for women.” 

Y/N snorted, “It still makes me look weak.” 

“You aren’t.” 

“I know. It’s just time. I can do this Inej. I’ll be okay.”

Inej sighed and eventually nodded in agreement. “Okay, try and get some sleep. Jesper is a hyper one to work with so you should be fully prepared,” Inej smiled, standing up. “I wouldn’t doubt it,” Y/N laughed. “Goodnight!” Inej called before floating out of her room. 

Y/N laid awake for a few more hours telling herself she was going to be fine. “It’s been over a month and you’ve been doing great,” she muttered to herself in the dark. At last, after a long while the restless girl eventually fell into a deep slumber. 

The following morning, Y/N was immediately met by Jesper. Big Bolliger was lingering in the hall behind him and Y/N assumed this was the other guy on the job. Great, she thought to herself. The guy that absolutely hates me now for almost shooting his manhood off. 

“So, you ready?” Jesper asked with wide eyes. Y/N noticed how his leg seemed to be shaking and one hand rested on his pistol, tapping on the side of it. “Uh, sure,” Y/N said. Jesper’s face split into a grin and he rushed by her. “I’ll fill you in when we get to the spot!” he called over his shoulder. 

Big Bolliger shoved past her, obviously still unhappy over the previous day, following Jesper out. Y/N felt a pair of eyes on her and turned to see Kaz making his way down the steps towards Per Haskell’s office. His impassive expression was back, but his eyes were burning with something else. Anxiousness? Concern? Anger? 

No not anger. He’s always mad at something, Y/N told herself. Catching his eye for a moment, she silently told him she was going to be okay before hurrying after Jesper and Big Bolliger. 

Kaz stopped on the landing in front of Per Haskell’s office, finding Y/N’s eyes. Quickly, he found the girl staring at the entrance where the two boys just went through. He could tell she had doubts about going, but he knew she wouldn’t back out much to his dismay. As if she could sense his presence, Kaz saw her turn around and her golden eyes met his. He sucked in a breath and silently wished she would come up to him and say she wasn’t ready and that she changed her mind. 

Unfortunately, the look in her eyes told him the opposite. He saw her eyes soften at the sight of him, but just as quickly as they found his, they pulled away, and Y/N flitted out the door and into the sunlight. 

Unbeknownst to Kaz, Inej saw the whole exchange and grinned at the thought of Y/N and Kaz. 

Y/N eventually caught up with Jesper, having to walk at a very brisk pace. “Saints! Slow down Jesper,” she exclaimed, finally reaching him. “Keep up golden-eyes. I’m in charge today and I set the pace,” Jesper snickered. Y/N glanced around nervously. She felt too exposed weaving in and out of the hustle and bustle of Ketterdam. 

“What exactly is the plan?” She asked. “Wait no, what exactly is it we’re doing?”

“We need to get this slummy little Ravkan trader to cough up some coins he owes Kaz,” Jesper said, “But he is smart enough not to travel by himself because he knows how Ketterdam is. A real con artist if you ask me. Not a very loyal Ravkan considering he hoards most of the kruge for himself instead of actually giving it to his boss.” 

Y/N nodded, trying to dodge more bodies. It was already hot enough with the sun beating down on them. How in the world does Kaz wear a tie everyday? Y/N thought to herself. 

“So,” Jesper continued, “Your job is to get the guy away from his little friend.” Y/N looked around as her, Jesper, and Big Bolliger made their way to a table in front of a little bakery across the street from some club. Y/N was tense. It felt ten times hotter already, and she was very unnerved at how quiet Big Bolliger had been this entire time. 

“There’s an alleyway, just over there,” Jesper pointed diagonally across the street to the left, a few buildings down from the club. “You need to get him over there where I’ll be covering the backside. Big Bolliger will cover where you enter the alley and we’ll handle it from there. Easy peasy,” Jesper concluded. 

Y/N didn’t say a word thinking about how she would have to lure him away from his friend. Tante Haleen’s voice rang out in her head, “Be a serpent girl. Draw them in with those eyes and then strike. The men love it.” 

“You know,” Jesper’s voice snapped her out of her thoughts, “If you aren’t comfortable with this you don’t have to do it. We can find another way.” Y/N glanced at Big Bolliger and he was eagerly waiting for her response. She would not give him the satisfaction. 

Y/N shook her head, “No, I can do this. I’ll be fine. Easy peasy, like you said.” Jesper gave her a wary look but nodded his head. Big Bolliger, however, had a look on his face that ran shivers up Y/N’s spine. He was betting on her to fail so he could chew her out and get her back for yesterday. Y/N gulped and sunk in her seat watching the crowd roll by and trying not to vomit all over the table. 

After about thirty minutes of waiting, Jesper nudged her arm, “There he is.” He pointed to two fairly pale, slimy looking school-boys. The target was the taller of the two, but almost sickly like. The boy had absolutely no muscle on his body, but had a slight gut popping out from his stained shirt. 

“That’s the con artist?” Y/N asked in complete shock. She stifled a laugh as Jesper rolled his eyes. “Yes he doesn’t look like much, but that guy is pretty good at what he does. His friend on the other hand is just along for the ride,” he said. 

“Jesper, this guy is like our age,” Y/N burst out laughing. “Yes yes I know. But Kaz needed him to run something to another guy. Then the other guy made the mistake of telling him to take money back to Kaz and well you get the idea,” Jesper said. 

“Let’s go,” Big Bolliger snapped, interrupting their conversation and standing up, walking away before the two could say anything. Jesper and Y/N then stood up and he turned to Y/N one last time. “Look it’ll be ok. We’ll be just around the corner and will be on the guy as soon as you get him in the alley,” Jesper smiled at her before disappearing in the crowd. 

Y/N took in a nervous breath before making her way towards the two guys in front of the club. Putting up her best facade, she waltzed up to them, eyes on the taller one. “Win good, boys?” Y/N smirked, batting her eyes. Everything inside of her was screaming to run. 

The two Ravkans eyed her curiously, but the target took the bait. “No not today, sadly,” he said with a thick accent. “Oh that’s too bad,” Y/N pouted, resting a hand on his shoulder. The guy reeked. 

“I’m sure there are other ways to make up for it though,” she whispered, biting her lip. Gag. The man liked where this was heading, and allowed his hand to slip over her back, grabbing her waist and pulling her close. Y/N stiffened as his hand slid dangerously low. 

She pushed aside her fear and said, “Why don’t we go somewhere a little more private? I’m sure your friend won’t mind.” The guy smirked and turned to his friend, speaking something in their native language. She only understood bits of Ravkan, but this was surely something she didn’t want to hear. The two guys shared a disgusting look and high-fived before he said, “All set.” 

“Wonderful,” Y/N muttered as she turned her back to him, pulling him towards the alley. The guy stayed very close behind her. Y/N felt the weight of his hand on her lower back, slipping ever so slightly lower. She suppressed her shutter and kept telling herself, just a few more feet. Memories of slimy men flipped through her mind like a movie, and Y/N felt as if the walls were closing in around her. 

Every step she took, Y/N heard the comments about how such a little girl was so beautiful, but along with that Tante Haleen’s words echoed through her mind as well. Every beating, every client who made her cry, everything terrible. 

But one voice kept her walking, ignoring the man’s hand, ignoring his breath on her neck. I don’t want to see you get hurt like that again. You don’t deserve it. Kaz’s voice was the loudest of them all. She didn’t know why, but she didn’t care. He kept her from drowning, and his voice gave her that sense of hope that she could make it through this. 

Y/N felt a wave of relief rush through her as she could see the alley maybe six feet in front of her now. She turned towards the Ravkan and gave him a mischievous grin. He took the bait yet again, grabbing her waist and pulling her close. His head found the crook of her neck and started placing wet, nasty kisses. Y/N had to physically hold back her puke. 

Just as they were about to stumble into the shadows, a very familiar voice rang out, “Is that my serpent?” Y/N froze. Tante Haleen was staring directly at her with an ice cold glare. “You bitch!” she shrieked. The Ravkan pulled away from her and gave her a confused look. “You know this girl?” he asked the Peacock as she was approaching them. “Oh I know this one all right,” Tante snapped. “She wanted out of my house for the longest time. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s playing you right now! She doesn’t like when men touch her,” she sneered.

The Ravkan glanced around nervously. Y/N couldn’t move or speak. “If you’re going to act like this then I’ll just bring you back to where you belong!” Tante Haleen screeched pushing through the crowd. The Ravkan took one more glance at Y/N before bolting. Before Y/N had known what happened though, Big Bolliger’s body slammed into the Ravkan and dragged him into the alleyway, not before shoving Y/N onto the ground. Tante Haleen reached the girl on the ground and yanked her up by her hair. Memories of the night Y/N took the beating in public resurfaced. 

“I told you I’d take you back in chains,” the woman snarled in Y/N’s face. Tante’s hand ran across her cheek and Y/N could feel the tears burning in her eyes. She slapped her repeatedly and threw the girl back on the ground. You don’t deserve it. 

Y/N’s head cleared as soon as she heard Kaz’s words echo through her mind. They were as clear as day. “No,” Y/N mumbled, finally able to form words. 

“Excuse me?” 

“No,” Y/N said more firmly, meeting the woman’s gaze. “I will not!” 

Instinctively, Y/N kneed the woman in the stomach and sent her crumbling to the ground. She knew how to fight back. “I’m not scared of you anymore,” Y/N hissed, kicking Tante square in the face. The woman was knocked out cold. Y/N shook herself out and ran into the alley.

Big Bolliger had the Ravkan pinned up against the wall as he was struggling to get something from his pockets. “Thank you, thank you,” Jesper said as the guy handed him two pouches. “Alright I think we got it all,” Jesper said after counting. Y/N let out a sigh of relief as Big Bolliger let the man drop. The Ravkan immediately took off in the opposite direction and disappeared around the corner. 

However, Big Bolliger then rounded on her. He came storming at her, shoving her against the wall. She felt his hands close around her throat. Everything was starting to cave in on her again and her mind went back to awful times when men pulled stuff on her like this. “Whoa whoa!” Jesper exclaimed trying to pull him off, but he just shoved him out of the way. “What the hell was that?” Big Bolliger snarled in Y/N’s face. Y/N found herself at a loss for words again, partially from being strangled at the moment.

“You try an act all tough, but I see right through you. And you just proved it! You could’ve ruined the whole job, bitch,” his words cut through her like a knife. “All you’ll ever be is some whore that Brekker decided to pull off the streets for himself.” Ouch. 

“Dude, let her go, she did fine,” Jesper interjected. Big Bolliger glared at Y/N for a moment longer before releasing her. Y/N collapsed, coughing and gasping for air. Jesper knelt down beside her placing a hand on her back, but she flinched away from him. 

Big Bolliger snorted, “I guess I was wrong. Can’t even take a man’s touch. Looks like you can’t even be a whore right.” Y/N felt tears start to fall. Why did Kaz pick her? She thought miserably. 

“That’s enough!” Jesper snarled at Big Bolliger. “Let’s go.”

“Whatever. It’s your funeral when Brekker finds out what happened,” Big Bolliger shoved past Jesper and disappeared back in the crowd. “C’mon,” he said gently, but did not touch the shaking girl. Y/N slowly stood, feeling the throbbing in her neck from his fingers. She still felt like she couldn’t breathe. There were probably marks left too. 

Jesper and Y/N made their way back to the Slat slowly. Big Bolliger was already back by the time the pair came in. Kaz’s jaw locked as soon as he caught sight of Y/N’s face. He was not happy. Inej was by her side in an instant, “What happened?” Y/N just shook her head and made her way over to where Kaz and Big Bolliger were sitting. Jesper laid the bags down in front of Kaz as Big Bolliger said, “We were lucky I got there in time. What were you thinking sending her on a job?” 

He felt pretty confident with Kaz. “I mean, she froze and almost lost the guy cause what?” Big Bolliger faced Y/N again. Kaz noticed how she physically shrunk away from his gaze, her golden eyes wide with terror again. Kaz also saw light bruising around her neck and her face stained with tears and red marks. 

“Cause the woman from the Menagerie came to talk to her,” Big Bolliger answered before Y/N could. If she could even speak. Kaz got the sneaking suspicion that the bruises around her neck were not from the Peacock though. His hard gaze turned back to Big Bolliger. 

“What happened to her neck?” he growled. Big Bolliger’s face went pale, but he didn’t answer. “What happened to her neck?” Kaz repeated, his anger rising. When no one answered, Jesper stepped in, “This lunatic grabbed her and threw her up against the damn wall! We got the job done didn’t we?” He exclaimed. 

Y/N had never seen it before, and she was sure no one else had either. Kaz completely lost it. The table was flipped in front of him and Kaz’s cane collided with Big Bolliger’s face. “What the hell!” He cried in pain. “I stepped in when she froze up! She needed to be put in place.”

Kaz kicked Big Bolliger in the stomach causing him to hunch over in pain. “You know damn well the job got done and was successful. She got the guy over to you. I don’t care if you’re the strongest, the biggest, the whatever, you do not lay your hands on her again if you want to keep them. Suck up your pride and get over what happened yesterday,” Kaz hissed, leaning over the quivering boy, with a fistful of hair in his hand. “And get the fuck out.”  

No one dared utter a word as Kaz lifted himself up from his squatting position. Big Bolliger’s face was swollen and his eyes were now swimming with fear. Y/N had never seen Kaz so angry, and the worst part was that his eyes burned with fury much like Tante Haleen’s did whenever she disobeyed. 

“Don’t you all have other stuff to do?” Kaz snapped. The crowd broke apart as everyone scurried away like mice. Inej clung to Y/N’s arm as Kaz turned to the two girls. “Go, Inej,” he said through gritted teeth, obviously not trying to yell at his Wraith. They stared at each other for a hard moment as if she was challenging him. Eventually, his eyes narrowed and he huffed, “I’m not going to hurt her.” 

Inej still didn’t budge. 

“It’s okay,” Y/N said quietly to her as Kaz glared back. After a moment, Inej dropped her gaze and muttered, “You have a real bad habit of saying everything is okay when it isn’t.” “I know, but this time it is,” Y/N managed a strained smile before removing her arm from Inej’s and moving silently over to Kaz. For the first time in the entire day, Y/N finally felt safe. 

Too many of the wrong hands had been on her and she didn’t want to feel suffocated anymore, and with Kaz, that’s exactly what she could get. He glanced at Y/N before heading back up the steps. 

Soon enough, he and Y/N found themselves back in his room just as they were the previous day. This time Y/N finally broke down as soon as the door was closed. The horrible memories of every beating came back to her, and the stench of the Ravkan filled her nose again. Before she could stop it, she finally spilled the contents in her stomach. 

When it was all out, she felt sufficiently better and stared at the nasty puddle of puke on the floor and realized what she had just done. “I am so sorry,” Y/N looked up at Kaz who seemed to be grimacing a bit, refusing to look at the floor. “I--” Y/N’s voice died in her mouth. 

“No, no, it’s uh fine. I’ll make someone else clean it up. I’m honestly surprised you lasted this long anyways,” Kaz groaned a bit motioning her to move away from the puke. He moved her to the window sill and pushed the window open to let some fresh air in. Y/N sat down as Kaz rested a hand on the frame of the building above his head. 

The fury in his eyes were gone as he studied her tired looking features. There was a prominent bruise forming on her face and a little cut under her eye. His jaw locked again as his eyes wandered down to her neck, where an outline of Big Bolliger’s fingers bruised her neck. 

Y/N squirmed under his gaze as she felt her face heat up. But he still said nothing. He honestly didn’t know what to say. 

Finally, Y/N locked eyes with him, and she saw him take in a sharp breath. It was her eyes, gold as ever. 

“Look, I know what you’re thinking. I’m fine now. Yes I almost lost the guy, but I mean that damn woman,” Y/N started. “I don’t blame you,” Kaz interrupted. “You don’t have to do that,” Y/N hissed. Kaz seemed a bit taken aback at her outburst, but let her continue.

“You don’t need to baby me. I know I screwed up, but you babying me isn’t going to fix anything. We got the job done, I froze. That’s what happens to people like me. I’m broken, Kaz. I still don’t get why you picked me!” Y/N declared, standing up. “I’m broken. It’ll always be like this for me! Maybe I’ll get better but that pain will still be with me. I haven’t seen my family in years, I’ve been beaten, raped, tortured by the hands of disgusting men. I am completely and utterly--”

“Your eyes,” Kaz said softly, interrupting. 

“Wh-what?” Y/N asked, caught off guard at his response. 

“It was your eyes. That’s why I picked you. There was something about you that night. It,” he paused for a moment, taking a hesitant step closer to her. Y/N could feel her heart pounding out of her chest. 

“It reminded me of myself when I was younger,” Kaz admitted. They were chest to chest right now, and he was looking down at her with dark eyes. He closed his eyes for a moment and said, “It reminded me of when my brother died and who the person I was then. I--I used his body as a float. His dead body. All the way back to the mainland,” Kaz took a shaky breath, but continued, “But you. You were me. You were the little boy fighting to survive under the worst conditions. You were that person who didn’t deserve what the world threw at you. The person who didn’t have anyone to protect him. The person who had absolutely no one.” 

“Kaz…” Y/N whispered. He opened his eyes and saw tears running down her face again. Kaz brought a hand up, pausing. Taking a deep breath, he pulled his glove off revealing his slender hands. Y/N had always seen them from far away whenever it was just them, but never this close. She noticed the little scars that decorated his fingers and palm. Just like mine she thought. 

Kaz brought his hand back up to her face and she noticed he was slightly trembling. Y/N wanted to move because she knew he was uncomfortable. She didn’t want to put him in this position. But another part of her wanted to see what he’d do next. Her skin began to itch where his fingers hovered. 

Kaz wanted to do this. He knew what he did and that sick feeling began rising in his stomach without his gloves. Images of Jordie’s corpse flashed through his mind, but he stared into those liquid gold eyes. They were filled with warmth, not the cold water that nearly killed him. His mind screamed, begged him to put his safety net back on, but he wanted to feel her. And he wanted her to feel him. Not the mask of cool and rough material that could have easily reminded her of the rough hands in her past. 

Y/N didn’t dare move. She just let Kaz do what he needed. The next thing she knew, his fingertips were tracing the little scar next to her eye and down her face. For a moment, he allowed her cheek to rest in the palm of his hand while his thumb wiped away a stray tear. His hand was warm on her face and surprisingly soft. She had seen what those hands could do to a person, but  with her, they were gentle. He wasn’t the Bastard of the Barrel right now. He was Kaz Brekker. 

Kaz Brekker. The boy, Y/N had fallen hopelessly and completely in love with. 

And she was the girl with the golden eyes who he had, and would never admit to anyone, fallen head over heels for. 

He was pleased that she didn’t flinch under his touch, but as easily as those eyes melted away that drowning feeling, they still weren’t enough. He let his hand trail down to the bruises on her neck before letting it fall to his side. 

Y/N felt cold air rush around her and she longed for that feeling of warmth. But, she didn’t want to push it. 

“It’ll take time,” Kaz said quietly. She knew what he meant. And he knew she would. “Me too,” she whispered, a small smile on her face. 

Kaz’s mouth quirked up a bit as he saw the brightness in her eyes return. 

And for that moment, they were content in each other’s presence, neither asking for anything more than what they could give in that exact moment. 

_______________________________________________

I hope you all enjoyed this! That last scene with them I was listening to ‘A Thousand Years’ by Christina Perry when I was writing to it, and that LITERALLY made it ten times better so I recommend going back and reading it while listening to that song lol. 

[qqueenofhades]

i absolutely adored the crows in the show??? like they looked exactly like how i pictured them??? except for some reason i always pictured inej bangs and her hair cut to her chin, but!!! she carried inej exactly how i imagined and was perfect in literally every aspect. can we get a show with them please??? ben was awesome as the darkling, of course, genya was incredible, and even zoya!! mal and alina, on the other hand.........eh?? they were just okay??? like their acting was just okay 😬 what did you think!! did you like the actors???

I did enjoy the crows a lot, yes! As noted, they were the ones that I was most invested in coming into the show, and I think that overall, they really did do a good job in translating them to screen. Jesper is probably my favourite, as he was in the books, and I am waiting impatiently for Wylan to arrive in s2 so the two of them can be messy queer boys together. Inej was lovely, as expected. IMHO, they definitely softened Kaz down quite a bit from his book counterpart, but I liked the actor anyway and as I noted in some earlier ask or another, it was funny to watch them run around like chaotic himbos, be gay and do crimes, achieve absolutely bugsquat nothing whatsoever, and get to make friends with Milo the goat while they were at it. It’ll be interesting to see how they blend Siege & Storm and SOC (which I assume they will do next season, with Ruin & Rising and CK being s3, should we get that far).

Of course, NINA AND MATTHIAS. I’m doing a rewatch (just finished episode 7, preparing myself for Pain on this front in episode 8) and as ever, they FULLY own me. Also, cannot stop cackling over the fact that you are Matthias Helvar. You are unconscious on a piece of wood in the middle of a giant-ass thunderstorm after your ship broke up and your nasty colleagues who look like that one guy in Pirates of the Caribbean that Will Turner fails to blow up have deservedly drowned. Your captive, who you have chained up, said dumb things to, and otherwise given her no reason to like you, decides to save you partly because a) she’s a good person and b) she needs your help. You wake up, immediately fall directly off the raft into the frothing ocean, bellow “WITCH!” at the top of your lungs while flailing pointlessly, accuse her of being the problem, and have another argument before you agree to try to swim both of you to shore. If nothing else, you are consistent. You are also very stupid. Also, every time she talks, you gaze at her with literal hearts for eyes and then say something else face-palmingly idiotic. Your goose is so cooked. Alas.

(I love them. The end of CK is not canon in this house and never will be.)

As for Mal and Alina, aha, hmm. I’m not at all invested in them as a couple (I don’t mind them or anything, I just don’t have any feelings about them and it seems like a lot of telling vs. showing). Also, it’s my own opinion that they really don’t develop much as a pairing over the course of the series? They start out in one place and end up pretty much in the exact same place at the end. Of course, I am the messy bitch who prefers enemies to lovers and complicated relationships and Angst rather than childhood-friends-to-lovers, so that’s me. (Also the kid who plays Mal is like... 17, and I’m 32, so it would be a little weird if I was attracted to a teenager.) Plus book!Mal annoyed me in Siege and Storm to the point where I wondered why on earth Alina was still with this guy, so if that happens in s2, I will run out of patience with him real fast. I recognize they’ve also changed the character for the TV series, so we’ll see how that goes, and I think both actors did a decent job. They’re both young and these are their first big roles and they didn’t take me out of the story or anything. I also enjoyed Jessie Mei Li’s chemistry with Ben Barnes (obviously) and staring at Ben Barnes every time he was on screen. Me have smrt thoughts. Smrt.

Anyway. Yes.

[milo-my-beloved]

chapter six of stupid things!

Read on AO3 // Playlist // Buy me a coffee?

Wylan and Jesper took a cab home, leaving Kaz and Inej to find their own way home and a very disgruntled Matthias to deal with them. They giggled the entire way back to Jesper’s apartment, imagining increasingly ridiculous and complex methods that Nina’s boyfriend might come up with to get the two to go home.

Wylan insists on paying for the taxi, since Jesper had declared that he should stay the night. They tumble through the door, laughing at the possibility of Matthias locking their friends in an aquarium overnight, and collapse onto the couch, Wylan’s head cradled on Jesper’s chest.

“We should get up,” Jesper says, not moving. “Put pajamas on, or something.”

Wylan just snuggles closer to his chest. “Will you put a movie on?”

Jes smiles down at the sleepy man cuddled up to him and runs his hands through his curls. “Sure thing, sunshine. But I’m picking.”

By the time the opening credits of Star Wars have finished, Wylan is quietly snoring against Jesper’s chest. By the time the Death Star explodes, Jesper has followed suit, both of them pressed against each other, only visible thanks to the full moon outside the window.

{o0o}

One of the things Jesper loves the most about Wylan is the mystery that surrounds him. The only person he’s met that is more skilled at dodging questions is Kaz, and that’s half of his personality. Wylan is nowhere near as good at lying, but Jesper doesn’t push it when he clearly doesn’t want to answer a question. With anyone else he might have, but he really doesn’t want to lose the man who he’s grown so attached to.

Maybe Drunk Jesper has made one good decision. But that’s about it.

One of the few things that Jesper has managed to figure out about his boyfriend is that he’s secretly rich, and embarrassed about it. He always wears quality clothes - soft, cashmere jumpers and dress shirts and fancy shoes - and he insists on paying for a lot of things they do together, but he always blushes whenever Jesper teases him for it.

Actually, Wylan blushes quite a lot. It’s one of Jesper’s favourite things about him.

When they wake up on Saturday morning to the sunlight streaming through the window, they’re still packed tightly together. Jesper’s arm is stiff from being curled protectively around Wylan, who has apparently spent the night drooling on Jesper’s shirt.

If it was anyone else, it would be disgusting, but Jesper finds it strangely endearing.

“Morning, sunshine,” he greets, smiling to himself as Wylan yawns and stretches. “How did you sleep?”

He mumbles an unintelligible response against Jesper’s chest before turning and burying his face back into the crook of his arm. Jesper laughs quietly, but he brings his hand up to cup Wylan’s head and gently strokes his hair.

“For all that drool you’ve managed to get on my chest, you’d better plan an excellent date,” Jesper teases, but Wylan doesn’t respond, already fast asleep again.

{o0o}

Wylan has never been a fan of surprises. Everything in his life has always been planned; from his wardrobe to his meals to what he is supposed to be in life. That’s why he messages the group chat on Wednesday with his plans, rather than leaving it as a surprise like everyone else seems so fond of doing.

Wylan: I know what we’re doing on Friday :D

Inej: and you’re gonna tell us???

Wylan: yes :DDD

Kaz: unheard of

Wylan: I got us tickets to the new exhibit at Ketterdam Museum!!!

Jesper: wat

Inej: awesome! what’s it on?

Wylan: fossils, I think :)

Jesper: there better be a gift shop

He smiles to himself, looking down at his phone as he checks the museum website. Huh. There is a gift shop.

{o0o}

Kaz and Inej mention something vague about going to dinner before meeting them at the museum, so Wylan and Jesper make their own way. Wylan calls them a taxi, smiling to himself as Jesper complains about their friends the entire way there.

“All I’m saying is that it’s rude!” he exclaims, flapping his arms about for emphasis. “It’s called a ‘double date’ for a reason, there’s supposed to be two couples there.”

Wylan hums noncommittally.

“If they were just getting a different ride there then I guess I could understand that, but to go out for dinner first? That’s, like, a whole activity that they’re doing without us!”

“You’re here,” the driver interrupts as they pull up to the front of the museum building.

“Thank you,” Wylan says, handing over the money. “And Jes, how about we go out for dinner afterwards? Just us, I mean.”

Jesper pouts as he climbs out the car. “I already ate.”

“I’m sure you can find room,” Wylan replies, rolling his eyes fondly. “Look, there’s Kaz and Inej.”

Sure enough, their two friends are waiting on the steps outside the museum, huddled together with Kaz’s cane propped up beside them. Inej spots them as they start to approach and stands up, waving frantically to catch their attention while Kaz shakes his head at her antics.

Wylan tugs the corner of Jesper’s sleeve, waving back with his other hand. “Come on!”

Jesper rolls his eyes. “Can we just pretend we don’t know them and go get food now?”

“I thought you ate already?”

“Oh, piss off.”

Wylan grins widely when they finally reach them, brandishing the four tickets in front of him like magician asking ‘is this your card?’ Jesper snatches one out of his hand before anyone gets the chance, Kaz and Inej taking theirs in a much more dignified fashion.

For all their excited chatter as they head towards the entrance, Jesper has to admit, a trip to a museum has never been on his list of dream dates. Or vaguely acceptable dates. Or a day out with his friends. At best, he decides, he might have gone on a school field trip, but mostly only to get out of doing much work for a day.

The foyer of the building is impressive, even by his standards, but he still doesn’t feel nearly as excited as Inej or Wylan. (It’s hard to tell what Kaz is feeling at any given moment, but Jesper is fairly sure he has never seen him excited.) It’s only after they hand their tickets over to a kind attendant and round the corner that Jesper stops in his tracks and stares ahead, his mouth wide open.

“Is that… a dinosaur?” he asks, completely rooted to the spot.

No one bothers dignifying his question with a response, all of them too busy staring at the huge creature standing before them. Of course, it is just bones, but there is still something incredible about being so close to an animal that has been dead for millions of years.

Of all of them, Wylan seems to be the least affected.

“It’s the first T-rex to be displayed in Ketterdam for over a hundred years!” he exclaims in a hushed tone, smiling at the awed expressions on his friends’ faces. “I think his name is Titus.”

“Woah,” Inej says, stepping towards it. “It’s huge!”

“Twelve feet tall,” Wylan responds with a smile.

“How come you know so much already?” Kaz asks, his eyes wandering around the rest of the room.

“I booked the tickets, remember. I looked at the website.”

“Kaz!” Inej exclaims, grabbing his gloved hand and pointing across the room with her other hand. “Look, they have an interactive section.”

Even as the other two disappear around a corner, Wylan and Jesper stay rooted to the spot. It takes a few minutes for Jesper to get over his original shock of being face-to-face with a twelve-foot tall dinosaur, but when he does, he practically starts vibrating on the spot.

“Wy, I can’t believe you didn’t tell me we were gonna see actual dinosaurs! This is so freaking cool,” he exclaims, slowly walking around Titus to get a better look at his side.

“I did!” Wylan protests, smiling at the look of awe on Jesper’s face. “I told you the exhibit is on fossils.”

“I thought we were gonna go see a load of musty rocks with weird shapes in them, not a T-rex!”

Wylan just laughs, squeezing Jesper’s hand. “I didn’t know you were such a fan of dinosaurs.”

“Come on, man,” Jesper protests. “Jurassic Park is one of my favourite movies of all time.”

“Hopefully, these ones don’t come to life,” Wylan quips, and Jesper giggles, dragging him around the rest of the exhibit.

{o0o}

After Jesper has read every single piece of information there is to read (in a range of funny voices) to Wylan, and every corner of the museum has been explored, they decide it’s time to call it quits.

“Shall I call a cab?” Kaz asks as they head towards the museum entrance.

“Not for us,” Wylan replies, squeezing Jesper’s hand. “We’re gonna stay out in town for a while longer.”

“Alright,” he says, fishing his phone out of his pocket and stepping away as he calls the taxi company.

Inej smiles at them, bringing them both into a tight hug. “Thanks for organising this, Wylan! I had fun.”

He blushes. “It was my pleasure. I’ll say goodbye to you now, though - I just need the toilet before we go.”

“See you next week,” she replies, squeezing them both tightly before pulling away.

“Bye,” he says, before turning to Jesper. “Go and wait with them - I’ll only be five minutes.”

“Alright,” Jesper replies, kissing the top of his head. “You better not leave me for too long, though. It’s rude to keep your hot date waiting.”

“Is it, now?” Wylan laughs, turning away and hurrying down the corridor. He heads in the right direction until they are out of sight, before doubling back the way he came and darting into the gift shop instead.

It only takes a minute or two of browsing before he grabs what he’s looking for. He takes it to the counter, smiling, rummaging through his jacket for his wallet.

“Is this all, sir?” the lady behind the till asks.

“Yes, thank you. It’s a present for my boyfriend,” he replies, blushing slightly.

She smiles warmly, her eyes crinkling. “That’s so sweet! Here, if it’s a gift, I’ll wrap it up for you.”

Wylan watches as she deftly wraps it in orange wrapping paper, humming to herself as she works. “Thank you.”

He hands over the right amount of kruge as she passes him the wrapped gift, which he slides into his inside pocket.

“I hope he likes it, sweetie.”

“Me too,” he replies, thanking her again as he rushes out the door to meet back up with Jesper.

{o0o}

They end up going to a fish and chip shop and finding a bench in a nearby park to sit on while they eat.

“Wy, these have to be the best chips I’ve ever eaten,” Jesper declares, still chewing.

“I can tell,” Wylan remarks, raising an eyebrow at the (bordering lewd) noises Jesper makes while eating. “Oh, by the way, I got you something.”

Jesper’s head snaps up. “Dessert?”

“No,” Wylan laughs, fishing the small parcel out of his pocket. “I got you a present.”

Jesper swallows the food in his mouth and wipes his greasy hands on his jeans before carefully taking the parcel from Wylan. He unwraps it gently, laughing when he realises what it is.

“So there was a gift shop after all. When did you get this?”

“When I said I needed the loo,” Wylan admits, wringing his hands in his lap.

Jesper turns the fridge magnet over in his hands, running his fingers over the writing. ‘I survived a T-rex encounter!’

“Thank you,” he says, suddenly finding it a little hard to speak. “That’s really nice of you.”

Wylan shrugs. “It was like, five kruge. You don’t have to thank me.”

Jesper laughs, blinking away the wetness in his eyes as he leans over to whisper something in Wylan’s ear. “I have to tell you a secret though.”

Wylan frowns. “What?”

Jesper smiles down at him. “I don’t have a fridge,” he admits, giggling.

“Wha- how do you not have a fridge?”

He shrugs. “Jesper skills. Now shut up and kiss me.”

Wylan is more than happy to oblige.

tag list (ask to be added or removed!) :D

@hrtbreakprincess / @tooindecisivetopickaurl / @kazcoded / @saltyfortunes / @just2bubbly

[elriell]

Book Rec’s

Going to try and add a lot of less known books that are amazing and not enough people talk about, this would be too long if I talked about each one in depth, so I am going to leave my fav quotes as that tends to give me a feel for books and whether I will like them and I will link the GR page for more info! Happy reading:)

Fantasy Vibes

From Blood And Ash by Jennifer L Armentrout    (CLICK THIS TOO)

“Death is like an old friend who pays a visit, sometimes when it’s least expected and other times when you’re waiting for her. It’s neither the first nor the last time she’ll pay a visit, but that doesn’t make any death less harsh or unforgiving.”

“Fear and bravery are often one and the same. It either makes you a warrior or a coward. The only difference is the person it resides inside.”

 “You're an absolutely stunning, murderous little creature.”

Storm And Fury by Jennifer L Armentrout

“What are you going to do if it does get worse?” he asked. “Maybe I’ll get myself a seeing-eye gargoyle.”

(HONESTLY BADASS GARGOYLES. SO UNIQUE AND AWESOME)

Demons At Deadnight by A&E Kirk   

“I launched into a graceful ninja-like front roll, then stood my ground to face the monstrous heathen, fearless in my determination to vanquish the deadly foe.

Nah, just kidding. I bolted, discretion being the better part of not getting dead.”

“We are killers,” Matthias said. Bad news. 

“Not girls. We don’t kill girls.” Good news. 

“She’s no girl.” Insulting news? 

“What? Of course she’s a girl.”

 “Want me to check?” 

“Shut up, Blake,” the rest of them chorused.”

The Cruel Prince by Holly Black   

“If I cannot be better than them, I will become so much worse.”

“If you hurt me, I wouldn't cry. I would hurt you back.”

“I am going to keep on defying you. I am going to shame you with my defiance. You remind me that I am a mere mortal and you are a prince of Faerie. Well, let me remind you that means you have much to lose and I have nothing. You may win in the end, you may ensorcell me and hurt me and humiliate me, but I will make sure you lose everything I can take from you on the way down. I promise you this is the least of what I can do.”

MM Romance

Him by Sabrina Bowen & Elle Kennedy

“Our mouths fit together so perfectly. Every time we kiss, I fall even more in love with him, and it has nothing to do with sex or lust. It's him. His closeness and his scent and the way he soothes me.”

“I…” He clears his throat. “I’d let you do it, though.” My hand freezes in his hair. “You would?” Wes nods. “I’d let you do anything to me, Canning.”

Misfits by Garrett Leigh (Poly romance, its just so perfect ala herongraystairs!)

“Learn something. Read a book. Explore someone. Anger is just a hole where your life could be.”

In The Absence Of Light by Adrienne Wilder

“The light is a funny thing, Grant. We think it shows us what we need to see, but in reality, it blinds us. That’s why I brought you here. I wanted you to see me.”

“Morgan may be autistic, but he is a normal man with a mental condition, not a mental condition who is a man.”

HOneStly JUST READ IT

The Foxhole Court by Nora Sakavic

“It’s not the world that’s cruel. It’s the people in it.”

“I'm not a math problem." "But I'll still solve you."

“Is your learning curve a horizontal line?”

“Who said 'please' that made you hate the word so much?"  Andrew gazed at him in silence for a minute. "I did.”

“I didn't think I was a personal problem. You hate me, remember?" "Every inch of you," Andrew said. "That doesn't mean I wouldn't blow you." 

EVERY QOUTE IS ICONIC TBH 

Vampires, Angels & Greek Mythology

Bloodlines by Michelle Read

“The greatest changes in history have come when people were able to shake off what others told them to do.”

“Takes a lot of tries before you hit perfection." He paused to reconsider that. "Well, except for my parents. They got it on the first try."

“No, thank you," said Adrian. "These hands don't sully themselves with fighting.”

“Everything's about my personal entertainment. The world is my stage. Keep it up- you're becoming a star performer in the show.”

Angels Blood by Nalini Singh

“Some things were worth the dance with danger.”

“You do realize this makes your wings even more unique." "Are you saying you shot me as a cosmetic procedure?”

“You ask a lot of questions for a dead woman.” “What can I say? I prefer to die well-informed.”

“You don't fear me," he said now. She wasn't stupid enough to lie. "I'm petrified. But I figure you didn't make me come all this way just so you could push me off the roof.”

Dark Lover by J.R Ward (warning OTT vamps if thats not your jazz either skip)

“Some bridges you crossed on your own, no matter who drove you to the edge”

“Vengeance was one hell of a roommate.”

Half-Blood by Jennifer L Armentrout

“Two people see each other across a room or their skin brushes. Their souls recognize the person as their own. It doesn’t need time to figure it. The soul always knows… whether it’s right or wrong.”

“It’s just words and words mean nothing. Only action does.”

“People do the damndest things when they’re in love.”

“There is a difference between love and need. Sometimes, what you feel is immediate and without rhyme or reason.”

Assasin-y Goodness

Grave Mercy by Robin LaFevers

“When one consorts with assassins, one must expect to dance along the edge of a knife once or twice.”

“I comfort myself with the knowledge that if Duval ever feels smothered by me, it will be because I am holding a pillow over his face.”

“Surely He does not give us hearts so we may spend our lives ignoring them.”

“There is no shame in scars, Ismae.”

Daughter Of The Pirate King by Tricia Levenseller

“I am me because I choose to be me. I am what I want. Some people say you have to find yourself. Not I. I believe we create ourselves to be what we want.”

“Lass, you've the face of an angel but the tongue of a snake.”

“Everyone has something dark in their past. I suppose it's our job to overcome it. And if we can’t overcome it, then all we can do is make the most of it.”

“Waiting. Not waiting. One lover. A hundred lovers. There should be no judgement either way. A woman is not defined by what she does or doesn‘t do in the bedroom.”

“Even a man who’s spent his whole life at sea has reason to fear her when she’s angry. But not I. I sleep soundly. Listening to her music. The sea watches over me. She protects her own.”

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

“No mourners. No funerals. Among them, it passed for 'good luck.”

“It's not natural for women to fight." "It's not natural for someone to be as stupid as he is tall, and yet there you stand.”

“I will have you without armor, Kaz Brekker. Or I will not have you at all.

“The heart is an arrow. It demands aim to land true.”

“Kaz leaned back. "What's the easiest way to steal a man's wallet?" "Knife to the throat?" asked Inej. "Gun to the back?" said Jesper. "Poison in his cup?" suggested Nina. "You're all horrible," said Matthias.”

The Kiss of Deception by Mary E. Pearson

“It can take years to mold a dream. It takes only a fraction of a second for it to be shattered.”

“Taking another life, she had whispered, even a guilty one, should never be easy. If it were, we'd be little more than animals.”

“Maybe there was no one way to define it. Maybe there were as many shades of love as the blues of the sky,”

“We all have our different skills. You’re patient to a fault, which sometimes doesn’t work to your advantage. I, on the other hand, have the patience of a wet cat. Only on rare occasions does that come in handy.”

“Maybe there were a hundred different ways to fall in love.”

Circus Vibes

Caraval by Stephanie Garber

“Every person has the power to change their fate if they are brave enough to fight for what they desire more than anything.”

“She imagined loving him would feel like falling in love with darkness, frightening and consuming yet utterly beautiful when the stars came out.”

“Some things are worth pursuit regardless of the cost.”

The Night Circus by Erin Morgenstern

“You may tell a tale that takes up residence in someone's soul, becomes their blood and self and purpose. That tale will move them and drive them and who knows that they might do because of it, because of your words. That is your role, your gift.”

“Secrets have power. And that power diminishes when they are shared, so they are best kept and kept well. Sharing secrets, real secrets, important ones, with even one other person, will change them. Writing them down is worse, because who can tell how many eyes might see them inscribed on paper, no matter how careful you might be with it. So it's really best to keep your secrets when you have them, for their own good, as well as yours.”

Six of Hearts by L.H Cosway

“Note to self: Never try to out-trick a trickster.”

“So why not live with the magic? Be a kid again and believe in the fantastical. Life is more fun with a little smoke and mirrors.”

“We all have thoughts that we would never, ever vocalise. And people who say they don’t are liars.”

“I once read that people who have imaginary friends never reach out to touch them. There’s some part of their brain that subconsciously knows it will break the spell. That’s what it feels like with Jay.”

Amour Amour by Krista & Becca Richie

“We all traverse in and out of people’s worlds, leaving footprints. Some larger, some smaller, but there is always a mark. We can’t sweep it away.”

“Life is a rollercoaster with no volunteers. We’re all forced to take a seat and ride it out.

“I’m average. I’ve been average most of my life, but there are moments where I feel extraordinary. Invincible. Able to conquer any fear and step outside any box. There is no illusion, no fantasy. I can climb a forty-foot pole. I can fly eighty-feet in the air. I can be taller than tall. It’s a dream that I’m living. Every day. With him.”

More M/M Romance

The Song Of Achilles by Madeline Miller

“I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell; I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world.”

“And perhaps it is the greater grief, after all, to be left on earth when another is gone.”

“He is a weapon, a killer. Do not forget it. You can use a spear as a walking stick, but that will not change its nature.”

“He is half of my soul, as the poets say.”

Axel’s Pup by Kim Dare  (Shifter Romance & BDSM FYI if thats not your jazz)

"I want to screw you, and tie you up, and make you writhe from-you know all that. But I want so much more. I want the whole thing, not just a quick scene. I want twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week. I want you to be mine. I won't take anything less."

Aristotle And Dante Discover The Secrets Of The Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz

“In your dream. You were looking for me.""I'm always looking for you," 

“He was funny and focused and fierce. I mean the guy could be fierce. And there wasn’t anything mean about him. I didn’t understand how you could live in a mean world and not have any of that meanness rub off on you.”

“He looked like an angel. And all I wanted to do was put my fist through his jaw. I couldn't stand my own cruelty.”

“One of the secrets of the universe was that our instincts were sometimes stronger than our minds. Another secret of the universe: Sometimes pain was like a storm that came out of nowhere.”

Shattered Glass by Dani Alexander

"Tell me something good about your life," I whispered, needing to hear that he wasn't as broken as I thought him to be.[...]"You." It was so quiet I almost didn't hear it.”

“Is he my competition?” I asked. “Everyone is your competition.” Peter lifted his hand to his eyes and began lowering it incrementally. “It goes normal human beings, crazies, republicans, my hand, imaginary characters, corpses and then, in a moment of lustful psychosis, you.” By the time he was done, his hand was below the table.

Romance 

Kiss The Sky by Krista & Becca Richie

“You’re not a pit stop. You’re my finish line. There’s no one after you.”

“People hope to touch the sky. I dream of kissing it.”

“I love the way he’s staring at me. It makes me feel more than just beautiful. I feel like I’m his. Like no one else could possibly compare to me. He doesn’t even have to say the words. I see it in his eyes. I can practically read it in his mind.”

“I’ve wanted so many things in life,” he says softly, “but you’re the one that has meant the most to me.”

Translation: I love you.”

Wallbanger by Alice Clayton

“You know those moments when everything is exactly the way it was meant to be? When you find yourself and your entire universe aligning in perfect synchronization, and you know you couldn’t possibly be more content? I was inside that very moment, and fully conscious of it.”

“The right woman for you wouldn't want you to change anything about your life. She wouldn't rock your boat, she'd jump right in and sail it with you.”

“It breaks my heart the way young girls pick themselves over, never thinking they're good enough. You make sure you always remember, you're exactly the way you're supposed to be. Exactly. And anyone who says otherwise, well, poppycock.”

Ugly Love by Colleen Hoover

“Ugly love becomes you. Consumes you. Makes you hate it all. Makes you realize that all the beautiful parts aren't even worth it. Without the beautiful, you'll never risk feeling the ugly. So you give it all up. You give it all up. You never want love again, no matter what kind it is, because no type of love will ever be worth living through the ugly love again.”

“Some people they grow wiser as they grow older. Unfortunately, most people just grow older.”

“Sometimes the spirit of a man isn't strong enough to survive the ghosts of his past”

“My grandfather used to say the placement of a birthmark was the story of how a person lost the battle in their past life. I guess you got stabbed in the neck. Bet it was a quick death, though.”

On Dublin Street by Samantha Young

“Gentlemen are gentlemen in bed. They make sure you're having a good time." "I'll make sure you're having a good time, and that you're okay with everything. I just won't be well mannered about it.”

“In truth it’s difficult to describe a broken heart.”

“Sometimes words aren’t needed for you to know a change has come upon you.”

Romance Series

Paper Princess by Erin Watt

“My skill, if I have one, isn’t dancing. It’s my ability to believe that tomorrow can be a better day.”

“My life is mine. I live it. I control it.”

“but a clean knife still makes a painful wound.”

“Fate is for the weak--those people who don't have enough power or will to shape life into what they need it to be.”

Foreplay by Sophie Jordan

“I’m not going to lie to you and convince you that I’m someone good and shiny like your guy that’s going to be a doctor.”

“You can’t even see it. I’m the safest thing you’ll ever find”

“That's what I wanted. Something to enrich me, to make me feel better about the things in my life that I could never change."

Wait for You by J.Lynn.  (AKA Jennifer L Armentrout) 

“You are really…” “Amazing? Awesome?” He paused, brows raised. “Astonishing?” “I was going to go with bizarre.” “Well, hell, if I had feelings that might actually hurt.”

“As long as the sun’s shining, shit can’t be that bad.”

The Deal by Elle Kennedy

“Sometimes people sneak up on you and suddenly you don’t know how you ever lived without them.”

“I want to murder him in his sleep, A. No, I want to murder him when he’s awake so he can see the joy on my face when I do it.”

“And the most important lesson I learned is that I’m not a victim—I’m a survivor.”

Romance w/ Epic Plots

The Unbecoming Of Mara Dyer by Michelle Hodkin

“This was the boy I loved. A little bit messy. A little bit ruined. A beautiful disaster. Just like me.”

“You could start a fire with the heat between you two.""You're mistaking bitter animosity for heartfelt affection.”

“You're supposed to say, 'All I want is your happiness. I'll do whatever it takes, even if it means being without you.'""Sorry," Noah said. "I'm just not that big of a person.”

“I’ll walk forever with stories inside me that the people I love the most can never hear.”

“We are far too screwed up for a goddamned love triangle.”

“You will love him to ruins.”

The Winners Curse by Marie Rutkoski

“He knew the law of such things: people in brightly lit places cannot see into the dark.”

“Isn’t that what stories do, make real things fake, and fake things real?”

“The Winner’s Curse is when you come out on top of the bid, but only by paying a steep price.”

“The god of lies must love you, you see things so clearly.”

Obsidian by Jennifer L Armentrout (are you getting the idea I love everything she writes? because I do!)

“I've always found that the most beautiful people, truly beautiful inside and out, are the ones who are quietly unaware of their effect."

“More books." His eyes went wide. "You have, like, them books you just said you haven't read." "Doesn't mean I won't get more books."

Angelfall by Susan Ee

“I never thought about it before, but I'm proud to be human. We're ever so flawed. We're frail, confused, violent, and we struggle with so many issues. But all in all, I'm proud to be a Daughter of Man.”

“Sometimes, as we're stumbling along in the dark, we hit something good.”

“I knew from the start that your loyalty would get you killed. I just never thought it would be your loyalty to me that would do it.”

Unique Reads

Dont Look Back by Jennifer L Armentrout

“I was stuck in a life I didn't remember, squeezed into the shell of this girl - this Samantha Joe Franco - and the more I learned about her, the more I was starting to hate her.”

“Things aren’t perfect. They are far, far from it,but they are getting there, and I wasn’t looking back. Not when there were so many good things in the future.”

Verity by Colleen Hoover

“I wasn’t heroic. I wasn’t simple. I was difficult. An emotionally challenging puzzle he wasn’t up for solving.”

“A writer should never have the audacity to write about themselves unless they’re willing to separate every layer of protection between the author’s soul and their book. The words should come directly from the center of the gut, tearing through flesh and bone as they break free. Ugly and honest and bloody and a little bit terrifying, but completely exposed.”

“No one is likable from the inside out.”

“Find what you love and let it kill you.”

Painted Faces by L.H Cosway

“We all paint on a face to show the world," Nicholas replies philosophically. "For some of us, that's quite literal.”

“I love him because he makes me laugh when I don't feel like laughing. I love him because he challenges my view of what a man is. I love him because I know I shouldn't love him and that he'll break my heart. I love him because he's a complete and total anomaly. I love him because I want to kill the sadness inside him more than I want anything else in the world.”

“You saw me, changed my life, made it better, and I’m completely fucking in love with you.”

Sorcery of Thorns by Margret Rogerson

“It was always wise to be polite to books, whether or not they could hear you.”

“Knowledge always has the potential to be dangerous. It is a more powerful weapon than any sword or spell.”

“When terrible things have happened to you, sometimes the promise of something good can be just as frightening.”

“You belonged in the library, as much as any book.”

“You unmanageable, contrary creature. You have made me believe in something at last. It feels as wretched as I imagined.”

Obviously not every book is going to suit everyone, everyone has pet peeves, and things that they won’t enjoy but hopefully this gives you some variety and I personally loved them all at some point! Pls feel free to come to my ask/chats to discuss any of them  that would make me so happy <3 this took 4 hours damn

[sandalaris]

LATE! but for the fandom asks: BtVS and Shadow and Bone? 💖💖💖

BtVS

my favorite female character: At the moment it’s probably Faith. Her journey and her approach to slaying has always been fun and interesting, but I’ve been thinking more about the things that lead her there lately. The bad choices she made and what could’ve gone differently with a nudge here or there.

my favorite male character: Xander Harris. I know he’s grown some hate over the years, but I love him dearly. He still one of my favorite characters of all time to this day.

my favorite book/season/etc: Season five is the best in my opinion. I’m not even sure why, but its just so good. Or maybe it’s just the last really good season of BtVS, because I feel like the show went down hill after that.

my favorite episode (if its a tv show): Hush is just an amazing episode. They do a lot with so little spoken dialogue, and the misdirect with Tara was just awesome.

my favorite cast member: Anthony Stewart Head, I always like him in whatever I see him in.

my favorite ship: I have my OTP, Spike/Xander, but at the moment my favorite ship is Angel/Willow. Every now and then I get back on them and need content, I’m just so damn picky about them and they’re on the rarer side ship-wise in the fandom that I hardly ever find anything I like. :(

a character I’d die defending: Xander! >:( He gets way more hate than he deserves and I am not here for it. I won’t got into a big defense now, many people have done a better job than me at it anyways, but the amount of blind hatred he gets is staggering.

a character I just can’t sympathize with: Warren. It’s not just that he killed Tara, but he entire storyline is basically just him being bitter and angry that life isn’t “fair.” I’d argue that he got way more than deserved from life to begin with.

a character I grew to love: Cordelia Chase. During my first watch through, I didn’t care for Cordelia until about season three. I loved her after that, and she was probably my favorite part of AtS. 

my anti otp I will call it notp until I die!: Spike and Buffy. I shipped them for a half a moment when I stumbled across a random season five episode before I ever started watching the show. Then I actually watched the show and just wasn’t into them at all. It’s not that I don’t see the appeal they could hold for others, but they hold absolutely no appeal to me and I really don’t like the subplot of Spike being in love with Buffy that happened in season five. 

Shadow and Bone, possible spoilers ahead! You’re getting multiple answers for almost all of these, btw :P

my favorite female character: 

In the Shadow and Bones trilogy it is my girl Genya. She had some amazing lines/moments and she put with so much all for the chance at a better life. And she was this subtle badass, fighting back in her own small ways, like the method she used to poison the king. I’m a little disappointed they didn’t show the Queen all fake and plastic looking in the show considering how Genya would purposely tailor her just a little off as revenge. I still like her in the show, but she hasn’t yet grabbed me the way she did in the books. I actually don’t think I have a favorite female character in the show at this point.

Nina and Inej mostly tied as my favorites in the Six of Crows books, but Nina made me laugh more which gives her just a little bit of an edge. She’s fun and flirty and doesn’t let anyone, even Kaz, keep her from being herself. She’s also a pretty good grifter, able to use her skills with languages and her ability to read people to get what she wants. 

I didn’t actually like Zoya all that much until later on in the series (a mistake on my part because Zoya is awesome), but King of Scars made her one of my favorite characters. Yes, she’s prickly and prone to jealous sniping when her position is threatened, but she’s also unapologetic in who she is and genuinely wants what is best for her country and people and will do whatever it takes to get it. She learned a hard lesson at a young age that being nice won’t protect her and has fought to keep herself and those she loves/are loyal to safe.

my favorite male character:

I’m not positive he fits the label of “favorite” but I certainly found the Darkling the most compelling male character in the books, and he’s pretty far up there in the show as well. I probably enjoy watching him on screen the most as well, although I feel like in the show Jesper was my actual favorite male character. He was certainly my favorite in Six of Crows books, and the show version of him captures book!Jesper perfectly. 

I wanna say that Nikolai is my favorite somewhere, because I love him so much (he’s funny and sarcastic, which I’m always a sucker for in a character), but I feel like he doesn’t quite count for reasons I can’t put my finger one.

my favorite book/season/etc

Out of all of the Grishaverse, Six of Crows is hands down my favorite. It’s a heist! With young morally-gray criminals who don’t all have this nice heart of gold under it all, who break into-and out of -an unbreakable prison while spouting off witty dialogue! 

There’s only been a single season in the show so far, but I’m excited to see more!

my favorite episode (if its a tv show)

Probably the episode two. There’s something about the way things were revealed and the subtle unfolding of many of the characters that I like. 

my favorite cast member: 

The only one’s who’s name I know is Ben Barnes and I only learned that when he was announced as the Darkling and Tumblr had a meltdown. *shrug* I mostly was like, “that’s the guy from The Punisher. He’s good at playing the villain, so yay.” 

my favorite ship

I don’t want him redeemed in the slightest, nor do I particularly want a happy ending for them, but I love the dynamic between Alina and the Darkling. That push/pull they have, how very alike they are even as they are very opposite, and how she just can’t shake her draw to him and him to her, although he doesn’t try as hard as she does. They have this connection, are insanely compatible, and part of this tragic appeal of them is that in another life they could’ve had that happy ending together. It’s beautiful and tragic, to see how you’ve broken something before you even had it. And there’s something so appealing for me in that, in how their feelings are this tangled mess that can’t be undone and the way they really are the only people who can fully understand the other and the bond that forges between them. 

On a lighter note, Nina/Matthias was my favorite ship in Six of Crows for a long time, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention how much I love Kaz/Inej.

a character I’d die defending

Zoya maybe? Or Matthias? 

a character I just can’t sympathize with

The apparat. I kept waiting to see if his motives were something I could relate with in the books. They weren’t. He’s just a creepy old man who wants Alina to die and become a martyr so he can lead the church in her name. 

a character I grew to love

Probably Zoya. She seemed to be such a stereotypical mean girl in the first book, there only to make things hard on the main character, and I fell for it. She really is so much more than that.

my anti otp

I will accept the term anti-otp just this once because I don’t really have a notp for the show or books. The closest I have is Alina/Mal in the books. In the show I can actually see it and will probably aw over them when they get together, but in the books? He doesn’t seem to care of Alina at all, even as a friend for most of the first book, and gets downright petty and bitter when she’s revealed to be the Sun Summoner. But I can see their friendship in the show, on both sides, and that’s gone a long way for me. It’ll probably never be a ship I love, but I think I’ll probably grow to like it well enough.

[archer973]

So, as I mentioned, I finished Shadow and Bone (the show) and oh boy do I have some Thoughts

General impression, I really enjoyed it! Especially seeing as I put the actual book series in the ‘Eh, Good But Not Great’ category. But the show really worked out (or changed) some of the things I didn’t like in the books (Mal, it was Mal), and the inclusion of the Crows was an absolute gem

More detailed thoughts under the cut (beware spoilers)

Characters

Alina - Jessie Mei Li was perfect. She was just the right mix of shy/uncertain and fierce, and I loved every minute of her on screen. I thought making Alina part Shu was an interesting way to play on her I-just-want-to-be-like-everyone-else issues, especially since they changed her childhood up a bit by making her the one that protect Mal from the bullies, and not the other way around. Honestly, the only thing I didn’t like with her storyline was that they didn’t go into the fact that suppressing her power all those years made her really sick/weak.

The Darkling - Gods, Ben Barnes is just so good in this role. His mannerisms, his presence, his voice... Perfect, flawless, and I want the man’s wardrobe (and his horse). I did like how they humanized him, let him be more emotional and earnest with Alina (which yes, is partially my Darklina shipper heart showing). Though I will say, I did kind of miss how angry he was in the books that he actually wanted Alina. Boy fell for his own con and he was pissed about it, which is just something I love in a character. And, not gonna lie, I did kinda enjoy the fact that we didn’t learned his true name until the end of the series. I know they revealed it early to create that sense of intimacy and softness between him and Alina in the show, but I’m a sucker for the ‘only on the brink of death will a reveal my name to you’ (I’m looking at you, Fury Road). But I do absolutely love how they’re doing the Darkling in the show, so!

The Crows - I love these three so much. I only recently finished Six of Crows, and am about to start Crooked Kingdom, but I fell fast and hard for these characters and seeing them in the show was jut wonderful. Kaz and Inej hurt my heart in the absolute best way and Jesper is the disaster bi of my heart. Any time any of these three were on the screen, I was overjoyed, and I cannot wait to see more of them.

Mal - Oh Mal. Obviously, he is the biggest deviation from the book. Which is the absolute saving grace of this show, because I do not think I would be able to sit through watching Alina pine after the petulant, arrogant, insecure asshole that Mal was in the books. All of his scenes with the Darkling were awesome, and I really enjoyed his brief interactions with the Crows.

Nina and Matthias - They were absolutely adorable. Nina in particular was a gem and I very much did enjoy their story.

Genya - I really wish she had had more screentime! She is one of my favorite characters from the books, and I would have loved to have seen her developed more. I also really didn’t feel like we saw how truly ostracized she was by the other Grisha, which definitely took away from the revelation she was on the Darkling’s side. I hope the do more with her moving forwards!

Plot

Dislikes - Definitely could have used more episodes, especially with Nina and Matthias’ story being added in as well as the Crows’. I really, really like Nina and Matthias, but I feel like it was a poor choice to try to tell their story at the same time. They could have fit all of it into a flashback episode (or flashbacks over time like we got in the books), if/when the Crows get their own show. As for the plot details specifically, my biggest dislike was that they made the testing scene from when Alina was a child way too calm. This is literally the root of all of her issues with her power, this is the point where she locked part of her very being away, and it was played like she decided to fail a math test. They had exposition their way out of a crucial scene and I know this show could have done so much better with it. The other thing that annoyed me was that they changed it from being that she showed mercy to the stag, and so could wrest back control of power through the amplifier, to that the stag chose her. Alina’s choice not to kill the stag was a pretty pivotal moment, and I feel like by saying the stag was the one who gave her the power takes the agency away from Alina in one of the few places in the book she actually had agency. 

Likes -  I really enjoyed how they worked the Crows in. Though, it was funny, because they couldn’t actually let them affect the plot that much, so they were three very competent people getting absolutely nothing accomplished, which was just hysterical. And Alina hopping into the back of their carriage... Peak humor, I was cackling the whole time. The general plot was a good mesh of following the book and adapting it for TV. I really enjoyed the fact that all the written things we see are in a Cyrillic language, it definitely helped set the tone. The costuming for this show was just lovely (again, I will take the Darkling’s whole wardrobe in my size please), and the effects were perfect. The Darkling and Alina’s performance at the Winter Fete in particular was fantastically well done. I liked the “prequel” look into the Crows, and can’t wait to see what happens with them moving forwards. Pacing was pretty good for the shortness of the season, and it didn’t ever really feel catastrophically rushed (Game of Thrones, I am giving you a hard side eye). I also really enjoyed the fact that when Baghra tells Alina the truth, Alina doesn’t immediately believe her. That was something that always annoyed me in the books, that it took like .05 seconds for Alina to believe the guy she was totally down to bone three minutes ago was a manipulative liar about to enslave her.

In summation, I really enjoyed the show, and cannot wait for season two!

[anemonereadssometimes]

Top 15 characters from books I’ve read in 2020

Yes I know it’s only been six months. I’ve read 27 books, which is way more than last year, love me some having graduated college and actually have free time. This list was Not Easy, the order changes by the day, and this year was a lot of rereads but I saw this idea and I thought it looked fun so here I am. Without further ado:

1. Kaladin (The Stormlight Archive by Brandon Sanderson)

I love my too honorable, depressed, protective boy. He tries so hard all the time, and he attaches and loves everyone. He tries to give everything and more of himself to save and it might not be healthy but I relate so hard lmao. I just love him so much. He’s grumpy as hell and takes too much responsibility but goddamit he cares.

2. Jesper Fahey (Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo)

I just.... I love Jesper. His charisma shines through the pages. Jesper is the type of person I want to be, full of life, and sharing that with other people.

3. Inej Ghafa (Six of Crows)

Strongest person ever, I want to be her or I want to marry her, I’m not sure which. Every word she says is thought through, and she is deliberate, and reflective, and physically, emotionally, and mentally strong.

4. Fire (Fire by Kristin Cashore)

My favorite character from a book I’ve loved for ten years. I reread this book probably once a year, and my love for Fire only grows. She’s immensely reflective, strong, and soft at the same time. She gets to be both. I also love the strong woman who is kind and compassionate and loves children, because loving and treating children well and being strong/ having power are not mutually exclusive. She’s just wonderful, and I never get sick of watching her grow confident in herself and grow outside of her shadows, becoming something reforged. Also she’s beautiful.

5. Wylan Van Eck (Six of Crows)

Hhhhhhh okay I am wylan. I know this. I know that’s why I like him. He’s the parts of me I like lmao. He’s smart, confident when in the right situation, and just honestly the sweetest. When it comes to it, he’s brave, but he feels like everyone around him is leagues above him. Also he loves Jesper which like, yeah dude I feel that.

6. Sophie Hatter (Howl’s Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones)

Sophie is mean as hell and I appreciate that honestly. She’s no nonsense and clever and wonderful. Hella strong character, I love every conversation she has with people. She also has the tendency to fall into repetitive thought patterns which is a mood.

7. Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch (Carry On by Rainbow Rowell)

Ah Baz. Loved this boy for years. We’ve run across another book I reread a lot. Baz is dramatic as hell, has a mean streak, but fiercely protects those in his circle. I am not him, and I sure as hell wouldn’t agree with him on everything, but I respect him as a mage and as a person. Also he makes me cry.

8. Sylphrena (The Stormlight Archive)

God I love Syl. I can’t believe she’s this low on the list tbh but she’s the cheerful counterpart to Kaladin. She’s an honorspren, so not a person exactly, but more of an idea, which is hella cool I wish I was an idea. She’s badass and she cares so much about Kaladin, and about doing what’s right by people. She’s kind and I got to watch her grow her consciousness and intelligence. One minute she is having a philosophical discussion with Kal and the next she’s pretending to be a rock, or sticking people’s shoelaces together. That’s a duality I can relate to and respect.

9. M-bot (Skyward & Starsight by Brandon Sanderson)

M-bot is not a person either, he’s an AI and I love him. M-bot made me cry my eyes out, actually I think every character on this list so far has made me cry except Sophie, and that’s because Howl’s Moving Castle is kind of a light book and I love that. Anyway M-bot is a sarcastic little thing and I love him. His lines are the funniest, but he also cares a lot, and is also runs a spaceship so like that’s awesome.

10. Spensa (Skyward & Starsight)

Spensa is probably my favorite character that I spend the whole book yelling at. Jk, not the whole book, but she does frustrate me. She’s so impulsive, but man she tries so hard and feels so much and I’m a sucker for characters that care. She’s a good egg, go read Skyward.

11. Eric R Bittle (Check, Please by Ngozi Ukazu)

Another character that’s made me cry! This one multiple times! I grew up alongside Bitty in a way, going through college at the same time he did, and weirdly coming out around the time he did as well. Feels like he’s been there with me, and I got to watch him mature and beat his own demons. I’m so proud of him and I squeal every time I see him. He’s such a stinking sweetheart.

12. Simon Snow (Carry On)

Ah yes, another idiot whom I love. But he cares so much!!! He loves with his whole self, he doesn’t do anything by halves. He throws himself headlong into everything, and he may be reckless and stupid sometimes but I love him.

13. Howl (Howl’s Moving Castle)

I listened to the audiobook version of this book, and I honestly think that cemented my love of Howl. The Howl voice the voice actor does is marvelous, and many of his lines had me cackling in public. He’s brash and grumpy and selfish but I love him anyway. Helps that he’s funny as hell.

14. Nina (Six of Crows)

Ninaaaaaaaaaa another character to get mad at, since she has a tendency to do stupid things, but she always does them for the right reasons. She’s badass, and she gives love to her friends freely. She also doesn’t know how to shut up and I love that. Also have a mentioned she’s badass? And beautiful???

15. Calcifer (Howl’s Moving Castle)

Fuckin’ hilarious. 10/10 jokes, the voice actor’s voice was also very good for calcifer. He loves to pretend he doesn’t car but he does. Also in the second and third books he’s hella badass which is cool.

Honorable mentions in no order:

Kimmalyn (Skyward)-sweetest bby, I love her

Shallan (The Stormlight Archive)- haven’t liked her every step of the way but she’s such and interesting character holy crap

Dalinar (The Stormlight Archive)- army general, has killed lots of ppl :/ but he’s so invested in change and doing good, and he pushes himself so hard. Love the way Brandon Sanderson writes everyone morally gray. Good stuff.

Penny (Carry On)- brash as hell, damn smart, will kick your ass, does not have time for you, kinda unlikeable, wait I’m describing book hermoine wait could it be that I loved hermoine in my formative years and now I love the carry on version of her? Mmm not surprising.

[betweenthepage]

January Reviews

The Lives of Saints by Leigh Bardugo

I love when authors do books like this because it's mainly for the fans to get more history and be more immersed in the world. The art in this was utterly beautiful. Daniel J. Zollinger did an incredible job. I liked finally learning about all the saints, but especially the one's Inej named her weapons after. I loved trying to contact Inej with those saints and perhaps see what she saw in them. Some of it was a bit boring for me or kind of like all "I guess???" moment when they named someone a saint. BUT IF YOU GET THE CHANCE, LISTEN TO THE AUDIO BOOK BECAUSE BEN BARNES IN YOUR EAR IS DEF NOT BORING. That 100% caught my attention, in case you were wondering. Personally, I liked seeing how others thought about Alina and her Saintness and it was cool to see how Yuri (from King of Scars) kind of started in the following of The Starless One. Personally, Sankta Lizabeta was my favorite story. And I loved that the last one looked like Leigh. 4 out of 5 stars!

Skyhunter by Marie Lu

Marie Lu is an auto buy author and she never disappoints! I had such a blast reading this. I know Marie watches anime so maybe that's why I draw this comparison, but I see some Attack on Titan similarities. WHICH IS NOT A BAD THING BECAUSE AOT IS AWESOME AND MARIE IS A GENIUS AND ALWAYS MAKES THINGS HER OWN. But if you like AoT and want to read this...do it. I LOVE LOVE LOVE how sign language was a form of communication as well as a skill that an elite group of people HAD to have. I whole heartedly believe ASL should be taught to everyone and this was such a great added bonus to an amazing story. Marie Lu always breaks hearts and while she totally did (MA'AM....FIX THE ENDING, PLEASE) I do wish we could have had some more time with Talin's partner. To get to know him more beyond the small tidbits that live with everyone. Talin's mother? The only words I can use are, "inspiring, talented, badass, amazing, genius." Marie please protect her or else I'm sending you my therapist bill. I will say I fall hard for Marie's characters, and while I loved everyone, I wasn't as committed to their storylines as I normally am with her books. All in all, I had a great time reading this and I am SO READY for the next book. Please be kind to us, Marie. lololol jk pls break my heart so I can feel something for once in my life. 4 out of 5 stars.

Beyond the Ruby Veil by Mara Fitzgerald

Morally gray characters are my shiiitttt so of course I had to pick this up. Plus the cover is so pretty! We start off with Emanuela being a very brash and cunning character. She knows what she likes and she is absolutely unapologetic about it. Scandal? Yes please. All eyes on her? Duh. Gossip? As long as she's being talked about. But the brashness does come back to bite her in the ass--multiple times--luckily she's cunning enough to try to fix things. Key word being try because boy does this girl make a mess of things. We all love strong, independent characters but we never talk about mistakes. Emanuela makes plenty and they have real, true consequences. I love that since not everything goes her way, no matter how much she wants it. She's sloppy, she's quick to act and ask questions later, and she'd rather be at the top any way possible. Her best friend, Ale is a great character but he didn't get a chance to shine until the end when he finally got more than 3 words out of his mouth before being dismissed. I was annoyed at how he was treated, though that does add on to what kind of character Emanuela was. She embodies the, "woke up and choose violence" thing lol. Honestly, she is more chaotic neutral or chaotic evil...especially towards the end. While I did like the main characters, the plot was lacking and seemed to only be useful to set the stage for the second book. And for that, a 3 out of 5 stars it gets! I am interested in the second book and can't wait for Emanuela to just be evil for real.

[kikuism]

hi mariam!! 💖 okay i know pretty much nothing about the divergent series, but i love reading your pointed opinion tags about it, so if you could improve tris as a character how would you do it? or is she (and i guess the whole series) just completely beyond repair?

hi jenna! 💙 ohhh this is a fun question. i’ve never really thought how i would repair her character, but let me try to think of some ways that i could make her more tolerable ...

my biggest problem was that she really had no personality to me, as far as i can remember. and to me, if i can’t imagine headcanons for a character, it means that character just does not have a personality for me to latch onto and imagine them in situations beyond canon. so, first, i’d give her some kind of personality that doesn’t consist of her boyfriend and making ‘witty’ remarks. i’m not even mad that all she does is lash out; i know other characters who lash out, too, but tris just falls so flat because i felt like veronica roth was just trying to show how much of a badass tris is; she just felt like a caricature of ‘strong female mc’ instead of, like, an actual human being. take toph, a truly unhinged character in my opinion, who loves lashing out: but she’s not just like this. i always think of the scene in the desert when the sand benders take appa away and toph understandably could only hold them off for so long. it really did hurt her for letting the situation get beyond her control. oh, and remember when she kissed suki, thinking it was sokka? we love to see it. also, toph is ultimately limited in what she can do and she acknowledges that. tris? she can shoot her way through any situation. making her invincible like this is just a turn off for me. 

another unhinged character that comes to mind for me is kaz from six of crows. he’s selfish, utterly mean and so very despicable. it’s very hard to like him at first because his choices are so questionable. this is what tris should have been like but failed to be. why? because tris has no substance to her character beyond the aforementioned traits. i don’t get a sense of who she is as a person at all. but for kaz, we know why and how he’s come to be like this. he’s said so many times: he’s a businessman in a filthy city crawling with people ready to cheat you out if you aren’t prepared, kaz has honed himself over the years to be sharp as a knife and ready to do literally anything to achieve his goals, no matter how despicable. and eventually, you end up rooting for kaz, even though he’s horrible so much of the time. even so, he cares for his friends--at first, he sees them as pawns, but then eventually he sees them as partners. he even jokes with them sometimes. and with inej, especially, he can’t even he close to her without feeling like he’s going to shatter. it’s these nuances with his character that make him feel so real and enjoyable to read. 

tris? does her personality ever change with anyone she’s around? does she ever have any goofy or endearing moments?? it’s like she’s just forever meant to be in this ‘badass’ mode with no sense of why she’s like this. now that she’s in dauntless, she’s forever going to remain a dauntless, with no nuance whatsoever. if she had retained some of her abnegation traits, it would have made her so much more interesting. and i don’t like how being dauntless comes so easy to her. sure, she had to train physically to become a better fighter, but you can’t tell me that spending your whole life in a faction that values selflessness wouldn’t rub off on you mentally in some way. but no. the moment tris joins dauntless, it’s like her old life is just completely gone. i would have loved to see instances of her abnegation upbringing clash with her dauntless reality. i would have loved to see her struggle with these two aspects of her identity, considering they are so contradicting. i would have loved to see her think ‘maybe this was a bad idea’. then, maybe, her inclusion into dauntless would have felt somewhat earned after a struggle. but no. she gets there, endures some bullying, throws a few punches, loses, trains, jumps on and off trains and plays capture the flag. oh, and she does get a tattoo to honor her old life, but i can’t buy that at all. show me you’ve been struggling to fit in dauntless because of your abnegation upbringing before ultimately deciding to honor it instead of it being a random ass aesthetic decision. show me that old life meant something to you! it seemed like tris just despised being in abnegation and couldn’t wait to leave. so her getting a tattoo to honor it makes no sense to me. it does not feel organic and just feels more like some aesthetic choice veronica roth wanted to make with her oc knowing how much the kiddos would gobble it up. and it worked. i saw this tattoo everywhere on instagram and the like. 

what are her interests, hobbies? what does she like to do beyond the immediate plot? i really think it would have been much better if we’d gotten to see her acting outside the realm of the main story sometimes. like, i cannot make sense of who tris is at all before the choosing ceremony and before the whole divergent plot even happens. she was just vibing at her own faction, doing what ... ? why should i care? that’s one of the reasons katniss is effective as a character, we really got to know her life before the games and how that life affects her performance in the games itself. we know why she’s the way she is and it adds a new level of depth when we watch her training for the games and when she’s finally in the games. if katniss seems mean and aloof (and she is), we know why: she’s been the sole breadwinner for her family since her father died. her mother lost herself in depression and so it was only up to katniss to ensure her and her family’s survival. oh, and living in the poorest, filthiest district also puts it into perspective. katniss has been operating on survival mode for years and years now. her skill with a bow? same reason. her badassery with her weapon feels earned because of her backstory. we know how she got to this point. and it’s the same thing with toph: we care about her because we know where she’s coming from and what she’s going through. it puts everything about her sardonic temperament into perspective exactly because she’s lived such a sheltered life pleasing others and now she lives only to please herself.  i like toph’s character. she is a true badass. i love her scathing retorts and unwavering confidence. tris is just a cheap, watered down version of her; she annoys me because there’s no soul to her. when she brags about her prowess, i’m like, why should i care? what have you done that should make me care about how awesome you are? you haven’t earned that.

now, why is tris like this??  ....to show that true strength comes from having nerves of steel and a sharp tongue and that’s it? why is she the way she is?  in what way does her past affect her current character and actions? in no way, because i have no idea who she was in her old life.

also, can she just do things besides...lashing out and using a gun?? maybe give her a sense of humor or an unexpected hobby? that would have made her character more interesting for sure. 

and the worldbuilding is fucking atrocious. i’ve no idea to this day why tris is a special snowflake as there’s literally no reason for her to be. it just makes her character even worse because now she thinks she’s special and everyone should be bowing down to her because she’s such a big threat. why? because she has more than one personality trait......i can’t. this is just utter stupidity and gives me even more reason to be annoyed at her for thinking so highly of herself for something so stupid!! if she were like everyone else, maybe it would have made her the tiniest bit more tolerable, but no. 

i think all this just boils down to the fact that veronica roth just wanted to make a ‘badass female mc’ instead of a real human. it just feels so 2010 to me. girls can fight. girls can talk back. girls can hold their own ground. like, okay, yes, and? where is the nuance? the humanity? she just feels like an android to me, like a checklist of traits the author just piled on top of each other to create the ‘perfect feral mc’. toph’s and katniss’s characters just feel organic, coming from and developing at a natural place. tris just feels so forced, a product of, like, this aggressive brand of girl power i cannot vibe with.

[swiftsuburbanlegends]

Kayla’s Top Ten Reads of 2017

I read a total of 36 books this year. Which was a goal I set out to achieve and I did. I’m elated that I managed to get through this year with so many awesome reads, a few of which I’ll share with you now. This will also be a long post so I’m putting it under the cut.

Number 10: We Were Liars by E. Lockhart

This book was amazing, it had so may twists and shifts in the storyline, but not in the ‘i don’t get what’s happening’ vibe. The only thing is I literally cannot say a single thing about this book without spoiling something about it. What I can manage to say is this. Our narrator Cadence suffers migraines. She does not suffer fools. (I stole that from the book).

Number 9: The Sun is Also a Star by Nicola Yoon

What an amazing story about chance and fate. I loved this book so much. Another one I can’t go too much into without possibly spoiling things. Except Natasha is about 12 hours from being deported back to Jamaica and Daniel has a potential future riding interview to get to. Both want completely different things from the day, and it’s interesting to see what wins out.

Number 8:  The You I’ve Never Known by Ellen Hopkins

Gonna come right out and say I literally can’t stress this enough. Do not read the synopsis for this book. It spoils a major plot point, and I think it’s best going into the story without knowing it. That being said I love Ellen Hopkins and I LOVED this book. It’s probably one of my favorites of hers of all time. 

Number 7: Of Fire and Stars by Audrey Coulthurst

Let me start by saying how much I am not actually talking about any other these books. But basically with this one you’ve got Princess Denna who has some forbidden fire magic, especially in the kingdom of her betrothed prince. Then things get even more fun for Denna when she meets the kingdom’s princess, Mare, and totally falls for her. Yes two beautiful princesses falling in love. That and magic is what sold me on this book. And it should sell you too.

Number 6:  We Are Okay by Nina LaCour

Except I was not okay after reading this book. Not okay at all. In fact I pretty much cried through a good 2/3 of this entire book and I read it in a day. “You go through life thinking there’s so much you need… Until you leave with only your phone, your wallet, and a picture of your mother.” This drew me in, it pulled and tugged until I was wrapped up in Marin’s world and watching how everything spun out. It’s such a good read and I highly recommend it.

Number 5: Eliza and Her Monsters by  Francesca Zappia

I literally don’t think I’ve ever read something that encapsulates fandom and anxiety in such a powerful way. This book was beautifully executed and I cannot begin to describe how great it is. 

Number 4: The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue

Do you like adventure novels? Do you like Grand Tours of England? Do you like bisexual main characters and the idiotic things they do for love? Please read this book. 

Number 3: Six of Crow Duology

Am I cheating putting these two together at number 3? I mean I don’t feel like I am considering it’s the same characters in the same story. What can I say about Six of Crows without spoiling everything? This is a heist novel. Our ragtag band of crooks and misfits must work together in order to achieve riches beyond their wildest dreams and the impossible of impossible endeavors. Trust me you want to join Kaz, Inej, Jesper, Nina, Mattias, and Wylan. You do, you just might not know it yet. 

Number 2: This Savage Song by Victoria Schwab 

Words cannot describe how pissed at myself I am that I still have yet to finish this duology. Because yes there’s one more book to go, and here I am at the cusp of 2018′s rise and have yet to find out what happens with Kate and August. Am I a masochist? Am I broke? Am I too afraid to see how it comes to an end? All of the above? Okay but for real I listened to the audio book for this one, and let me tell you. DAMN. It delivers. There’s a reason this one is sitting at number 2 on this list when I have yet to complete the series. And that’s because of the way the final chapter ended. I can still hear the words echoed through my mind. 

This book has monsters, both human and not, and it has heart. Please read these books. But if you read Our Dark Duet before me and then spoil it I will kick you so flipping hard. 

And out number one book of the year goes too…..

Wayfarer by Alexandra Bracken

Okay a stunning conclusion to the best book I read in 2016, Wayfarer has all the angst and pull of Passenger with even more of the gut wrenching. I can’t say anything else this book is a sequel. I can say if you haven’t read Passenger you should. There’s time travel, pirates, treasure hunting, and enough family drama to last you a millennium.

So there is is my top 10 reads of 2017. If you’ve read any of these books and want to completely freak out about them with me, please my box is ALWAYS open.   

[xserpx]

Six of Crows/Crooked Kingdom

So I finally, finally finished Crooked Kingdom. Holy fuckin shit I'm emotionally exhausted. Excuse me while I collapse in a heap and cry over these messed up children, and pretend that that one thing that happened never happened ;w;. @conjurewithrisk THIS SERIES HAS RUINED ME I AM A PIGEON AND KAZ BREKKER AND HIS MOTLEY GANG FLEECED MY SOUL I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY.

Spoilers after the jump.

Matthias

I’m genuinely so, so, ridiculously, horrifically upset by Matthias’s death. I haven’t cried that much since Deathly Hallows, and they were characters I’d grown up with for 7+ years, compared to Matthias who I didn’t know like a week ago. He was my favourite character from the moment he showed up (he’s a hitter, of course I’m gonna love him), and he and Nina were my OTP (chocolate fucking biscuits!!!! “You’re better than waffles, Matthias Helvar” ;___;), and I love how much he learned from her, his humour, how much he supported Nina through her parem addiction, and how he helped the rest of the crew. He was the one who could show up in a scene, and I’d be like “*w* there he is”. So granted I’m a little biased, but I really, really don’t like the way he died. I feel like it was more for shock value, which is such a disappointing end for a fantastic character, and I think that Matthias just standing there making a target of himself, convinced the kid wouldn’t shoot, didn’t make sense. Sure, he generally tries to see the best in people, but I can’t believe that at that age Matthias wouldn’t have pulled the trigger, or that he wouldn’t have realised that the potential was at least there. It also ruins Nina’s ending - bright, happy Nina, who only just got her appetite back! After only just recovering from something as life-altering as parem, and her change in Grisha ability, I hate that Nina has to then go through the grief of Matthias’s death. He had so much to live for!! I much, much prefer happy Nina to angsty Nina. It’s Fred and George all over again - a shock value kill by a nameless/unimportant perpetrator that not only horribly affects both their futures, but it takes all the joys and triumphs, the past beautiful moments and of all the things they did together, and makes them sad and depressing. It closed far more doors than it opened, IMO, and while there’s probably a reason for it I’m just not seeing, and while it’s a testament to Leigh Bardugo that she managed to make me that upset in the first place, and I’m probably just taking it to seriously or something, I can’t deny that my enjoyment of the duology as a whole has been seriously diminished by it. I can never praise JK Rowling for killing Fred, and I can’t praise Leigh Bardugo for killing Matthias. It was just such an unnecessary downer of what could have been a truly stellar book, and I don’t think it benefitted the plot enough to justify it at all. There was enough trauma, enough terror, they’d been through so much, and they should have all had a happy ending. It would have been better if they had. There’s probably some sort of other series that’s going to spin off of it, and I would like to see Nina again, but it’s Matthias I love the most and unless she somehow finds a way to bring him back to life without him becoming a zombified shadow of his former self, I just don’t really care that much, because I know I’ll only ever be thinking about what could have been. 

Wylan

I’m so glad Wylan a) held out long enough to get beaten up so badly that even the Barrel-hardened crewmembers winced, just because he wanted his story to be more believable (how’s that for a merchling!), and b) got his wonderful moment to show his father how good he really is. Van Eck made an excellent almost Scooby-Doo-esque villain in the end, and it was glorious watching him squirm. Wylan is smart, he’s brave, he’s perfect. I’m also glad he has his face back, mostly because I can do nothing but imagine him as Pidge from Voltron, and it makes me happy. Also “I want to make a down payment” oh my good lord. Also the Van Eck house is the shit. I want to live there. I also want to see more of Kaz being forced to sit through Alice’s singing, just because. Jesper

I WAS SO WORRIED THAT JESPER’S DA WAS GONNA DIE. Holy fuck, at least Ms Bardugo spared me that torture. I also love that Jesper got more screen time in Crooked Kingdom, since I felt he was short changed in Six of Crows. Also the fight in Black Veil was AWESOME, and using his Fabricator powers to BEND A BULLET’S TRAJECTORY, and giving his money to his Dad because he knows he has to recover from his gambling problem first omg i’m so proud of him <333 Inej

Don’t talk to me about Inej. She is glorious. She deserves everything the world has to offer and more. I did cried so much over Matthias, but Inej was second in line for my tears, though happy ones this time. Every time Kaz did something nice for her - not just nice things, they were LIBERATING things, IMPOSSIBLE things. Kaz the kind of guy who if Inej wanted the moon on a stick would give her the moon as well as all the stars in the heavens - I cried so much. Like every five minutes I was crying because of Inej, and seeing her happy makes everything better <3. ALSO CAN WE TALK ABOUT INEJ AND NINA’S FRIENDSHIP?!?!?! My heart, oh gods. Imagine if Inej hadn’t been there when Matthias died ;w;. And I’m still not even over their talk on the ship after Nina had taken parem. I really wish Nina (and Matthias ;w;) had been there at the Van Eck house at the end, because I need more of Inej and Nina hanging out together, and general hilarious teenager shenanigans with all six of them. Kaz

Kaz. Just... Kaz. I can’t sum him up at all, because there’s just too much, but he reminds me of a lot of characters I love - he’s a damaged child mastermind seething with rage and hellbent on revenge  - but that raw trauma he has that makes everything he is so understandable... I love it. Seeing him lay waste to his enemies is beautiful. The first time I cried in the book was during his flashback to what happened with Jordie and finally understanding why he refuses to touch anyone, so seeing him become more open with Inej, that moment when he realises he’s angry at Jordie for what happened (his associating Jesper with his brother omg ;w;) and seeing him take down Rollins, and mostly using Hertzune’s own damn con with waaaaay bigger stakes <3 <3 <3... That is the kind of stuff I signed up for.

To sum up, I truly hate how disappointed I am with Matthias’s death and how much it horribly overshadowed what could have been one of the most triumphant, glorious endings to any book I’ve ever read, but Leigh Bardugo has given me a gift nonetheless. I love the world, I love the characters, I adore heists. Anything that reminds me of Leverage is always gonna be awesome. I’m not sure if I’ll read the Grisha trilogy yet, since I don’t know if my nerves can handle anymore (though it probably helps that I already know Alina Starkov’s fate) - and also I still need to finish all the HTTYD books - but I loved this duology SO MUCH and I don’t know how I’ll handle not having anymore. I guess I’ll just have to go track down aaaall the Nina/Matthias fics (and fics in general).

ALSO CAN WE HAVE A MOVIE/NETFLIX ADAPTATION OF THIS PLEASE??!?!?! I need to see Matthias/Jesper/Wylan/Kuwei’s Black Veil fight, and Inej vs Dunyasha on the high wire. Please let that be a thing.