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amysteryspot · 4 years ago

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Better With You - Thomas Shelby x Female Reader

Request: If you can could you please do one about Tommy having a sort of possessive claim over you (not in an abusive way of course) even though you’ve never looked at him in that way, and when Michael comes into the family again you two get close, which makes Tommy extremely jealous.

Requested by: Anonymous

Fandom: Peaky Blinders

Pairing: Thomas Shelby x Female Reader

Summary: Thomas has known (Y/N) for all of her life and loved her for most part of his, always disguising his claim on her as friendly protectiveness. What happens when Michael makes his way back into the family and starts to get a little too close to her for Tommy’s liking?

Warnings: swearing, mentions of war, mild smut (?).

Word Count: 3526

A/N: I had a lot of fun writing this. Hope you all have fun reading it too. An especial thank to @the-friendly-editor for helping me edit this, it meant a lot to me. Tags are at the end of the post, if you want to be add send me a message. I would love to hear what you think of it, your feedback is always appreciated.

Things you should consider before reading this:

1. I named the Shelby’s mother Anastasia because I felt like I needed to do that. Also, I know that there is a lot of discussion about Finn and the rest of the Shelbys having the same mother or not. I just assumed that they all have the same mother and she died a little after giving birth to Finn. It is not something groundbreaking for the fic but I wanted to clarify just in case.

2. The boys went to war right at the beginning of it; I just ignored the information given to us by “The Ballad of Tommy Shelby”.

3. I probably forgot to warn you about something, I’m sorry.

(Y/N) = Your Name | (Y/N/N) = Your Nickname | (Y/L/N) = Your Last Name | (Y/E/C) = Your Eye Color

If you asked Tommy how long he had known (Y/N) (Y/L/N), he wouldn’t know how to answer—fuck, it seemed like the woman had been in his life forever.

He remembered the day his mother had brought him to the (Y/L/N)’s house for them to meet the new baby. Four-year-old Tommy had complained all the way to their neighbor’s house, much to his older brother’s amusement, until their mother had given him a scolding. (Y/N)’s birth had been the talk of Watery Lane. They finally had a sweet little girl for the neighborhood to dote on.

With two sons, Anastasia was more than happy to welcome the little girl into their lives, not so secretly longing to have a daughter, and that was the reason for Tommy to be fussing over going to see the newborn—jealousy.

However, nothing could have prepared little Tommy for what was about to happen when his mother sat him down on the couch and Mrs. (Y/L/N) put the bundle of covers in his arms—his icy blue eyes stared down at baby (Y/N), who stopped crying instantly when she looked up at him with bright (Y/E/C) eyes of her own. From that moment on, Tommy knew that he would always love her.

And love her he did, since that day and throughout all of their lives. He would raise hell at home for his mother to bring him to the (Y/L/N)’s home so he could see (Y/N), and the three adults would all be astonished at how easily the baby would stop crying when she was in his arms. It wasn’t really a surprise that the first word she babbled was “Tom” or that when she started walking, on wobbly feet, it was Tommy she was seeking.

As they grew up, they grew closer, until it became almost impossible to have one without the other. When Ada was born, Tommy was worried about the possibility that (Y/N) would forget about him, that she would be too enchanted by having another girl around. Instead, as the time passed, he discovered that his little sister was one more reason for (Y/N) to spend more time at the Shelby home.

Even when he started messing around with the boys on the street, and she befriended other girls at school, they would still seek each other out whenever they could. They stuck together when their teenage years came, when Tommy started fooling around with girls from school and secretly scaring down most of the boys that showed any interest in (Y/N).

At least, he did until the day she came crying to him about not being good enough or pretty enough for anybody, not like the girls he would go out with, and breaking his heart; that certainly wasn’t what he had in mind when chasing down the boys. All he had wanted was to protect her, to make sure that she wouldn’t exchange him for some other boy. He wanted to ensure that she was his and his only.

That was actually the reason that led to their first kiss—her first kiss—(Y/N/N) had asked him, pleaded with him, through all the tears to just kiss her and get it done. Fifteen-year-old (Y/N) was sure that nobody would ever want her, and she wanted to experience it at least once. She told Tommy he was the only one she trusted with the task.

“It will mean nothing to you, Tom. You have kissed a million other girls already—I will just be another one for you—but it’s important to me. Please, Tom? Please, please.”

Her pleas had won him over, but (Y/N)’s words couldn’t have been further from the truth—the kiss had meant something for him. It had meant more than he predicted when he gave in to her begging, because the moment their lips touched, Tommy realized he was in love with his best friend and the worst part was that she didn’t had a fucking clue about it.

Then Tommy did what he did best; he pretended that it never happened, pushing it away and never talking to anyone about the kiss or his feelings. He stopped chasing down the boys who would show interest in (Y/N) and watched as she eventually started going out with some of them, laughing with him about how stupid she was to think that no one would ever like her.

When her first boyfriend got too handsy and she broke up with him—not before giving him a good left hook that left him with a very black eye, just like Tommy had taught her—(Y/N) had gone straight to the Shelby home, looking for comfort in his arms. Tommy pretended that the gnawing feeling in his chest was nothing but brotherly protectiveness instead of anger, jealousy and possessiveness—a destructive combination, especially on a Shelby boy.

(Y/N) had stayed with him that night, and the both of them slept together like they used to when they were kids. First thing in the morning the next day, right after he left her at her own house, he found her now ex-boyfriend and beat him up. Arthur and Freddie had to get him off of the guy, afraid of what he would end up doing if they didn’t stop him.

After that, Tommy had focused on channeling his frustrations into going out with every girl in town that wasn’t her. It wasn’t difficult, he was good looking and charming and he was very aware of it; that’s how he met Greta, and thought that he could get over his feelings for his best friend with her.

Greta’s parents were against their involvement at first, but he charmed them, so they started dating. His heart broke down when (Y/N) found out and showed genuine happiness for him having finally found somebody to settle down with.

Tommy’s plan was to end things between them. However, Greta fell ill and he didn’t have the heart to break up with her, so he stayed by her side until she passed. (Y/N) gave him support in the only way she knew how: by loving him.

Just not in the way he wanted her to.

When they thought that things would go back to normal, the War exploded and Tommy did the only thing he considered right in his eyes: he enlisted alongside his brothers. Their first fight had taken place on the night he told her he was leaving for France in two weeks. (Y/N) had hit and screamed at him until he was able to take a hold on her and then, then she cried in his arms the whole night, afraid that she would lose him forever.

They did the best they could with those two weeks. Once more, nothing could have prepared Tommy for (Y/N)’s appeal the night before he was shipping to France. She had come to him right after dinner. Her father was preparing himself to leave, too, and both of the (Y/L/N) women were enjoying whatever time they had left with him before he was gone.

As they both laid there in his bed, resting in each other’s arms and staring at the ceiling, (Y/N) made the decision that would seal his fate if he could survive the war.

“Make love to me.”

It wasn’t a question, nor a request—she was simply telling him to make love to her like this was the most logical thing in the world. His breath caught in his throat, preventing him from answering at first, and (Y/N/N) took that as a cue to reassure him.

“It will be like my first kiss, Tommy, just something I have to get over with. I want it to be you. I trust you. Let me give you at least one last good memory of me before you go.”

Again, he caved in, not needing much more convincing than the certainty in her eyes as she looked down at him, propped up on one elbow. Her hand rested unintentionally above his heart. Granting her wishes, he let himself dive into his own desires, touching her the way he had wanted since they had kissed for the first time.

He worked her body like a delicate instrument and pulled at her strings smoothly, engraving every beautiful sound that he coaxed out of her and the feel of her under his fingertips in his memory. When morning came, they were still a mess of limbs intertwined together, trying to hold on to a last thread of hope and imprint the last few hours on their memories.

In a way, (Y/N) was right. The boy that entered that train in 1914 wasn’t the same that got out of it in 1918. Yet, his love for her never faltered; it just became a tad more… dangerous.

Thomas lost count of how many letters they had exchanged during the past four years. He lost count of how many times he dreamt of her, of coming back home and telling her how he felt. However, any courage he had gathered vanished the moment he saw her waiting for him at the train station. He couldn’t condemn her to a life by his side, he had already taken enough from her.

Polly had told him in her letters how (Y/N/N) had helped her with the business, with the house, with Finn, and with any other thing she could. Especially after her mother, who had given up on life after Mr. (Y/L/N) was killed in combat, passed. A part of him felt guilty for not being there for her as much as she was for him when his mother passed and his father left.

“She’s a Shelby now.”

That’s what Polly had said when he asked her if (Y/N) had any remaining family.

Not much changed when they returned. (Y/N/N) still worked with them. She spent more time at the Shelby home and the gambling den than at her own place. The two of them still sought each other out, not talking much, but enjoying each other’s company. It was in those quiet moments with her that Tommy had a little peace.

Thomas drowned himself in work to forget it all, wanting to expand the business, unleashing his ambitions so long smothered by the war. They found the guns, in a strike of luck, he thought. Both Polly and (Y/N) advised him to let it go, but he just couldn’t. It was too good of an opportunity.

Campbell had come because of it, and with him, Grace. At the time, he didn’t know who she really was. He thought that the beautiful, blonde barmaid was just that: beautiful and innocent, everything he and his family were not. So he fooled himself, fell for her, and then she betrayed him and left for America.

Again, (Y/N) was there for him, and again, he found himself sinking into his love for her. The only good thing that came from all this mess was that the business was never better. He thought that it was time to start planning for an expansion, and with that came another thing that he hadn’t quite predicted—Michael.

He had planned to find Polly’s children for her. She had been suffering quite a lot lately. Even if people thought that his heart was as good as gone, he wanted his family to be okay. He wanted them to be happy.

Thomas found the boy and he came to Polly, making his way into the family and the business quickly. That included starting to get close to (Y/N) – too fucking close for his liking.

It was supposed to be natural, he knew that. (Y/N) kept the books at the shop. She was better with numbers than most of them, so it was natural that she would be the one to help Michael when he assumed the position of accounts clerk.

After they came back, he learned that (Y/N) had become very good at sneaking around without getting caught. It was rare to see her with any men whose last name wasn’t Shelby, or wasn’t closely related to the Peaky Blinders. That didn’t mean she didn’t have men swooning over her all the time, or that he was finally okay with that—much like when they were teenagers, he wanted to chase them all down—the only difference was now he was more deadly.

“I couldn’t have done it without you.”

It was Michael’s voice that brought him back to reality, and his gaze fell immediately on the boy. They were all gathered on the snug in the Garrison. (Y/N) was sitting between him and Michael, Tommy’s arm casually rested on her shoulders.

(Y/N) said, “Oh, no, you would totally get it... after a few more weeks.”

Everyone burst out laughing at her remark, but the only thing he could think about was the hand Michael rested on (Y/N)’s thigh. His own hand clenched around his glass before he downed the rest of its contents.

He didn’t notice Polly’s gaze on him. Despite what most people believed, Tommy had never been a good liar. He could get away with omitting information to people and redirecting the conversation, most of the time, but a direct confrontation was a completely different thing. Polly was always able to read him first, to know the things he wasn’t willing to share.

“Maybe we should just hire you instead of Michael, then.” He ignored the look (Y/N) gave him, taking another drag of his cigarette and looking away.

However, he couldn’t miss the lingering touches, or how (Y/N/N) leaned into Michael when he talked to her, and how she was just so comfortable with him. It made his blood boil.

When (Y/N/N) said she wanted to get home he offered to walk her, and was fairly surprised at how she didn’t say a word to him until they reached her front door.

Then she turned to face him, features painted with anger, and asked, “What the hell was that, Tom?”

He actually rolled his eyes. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

(Y/N) huffed, turning around to unlock the door before entering the house, leaving it open for him to follow. She went straight to the dressing room, shedding her coat and throwing it at the table with her purse as he followed her closely.

“Oh, you know exactly what I’m talking about.”

She was taking her shoes off, and Tommy took advantage of the moment to let his eyes follow her movements. God, was he in love with that woman.

“I’m talking about your attitude with Michael at the Garrison. That was completely unnecessary,” She said.

“Someone had to put that boy in his place,” Tommy said.

(Y/N) turned to him then, and he would be worried with that look if he hadn’t been at the receiving end of her anger for so many years.

“Oh, please enlighten me, Thomas. What is his place?” (Y/N) asked.

“For fucks sake, (Y/N/N), he was all over you!”

She rolled her eyes. “He is a boy, Thomas, a boy. He’s family…”

Tommy never thought that what would make him snap would be hearing her say that Michael was family, but apparently it was.

“He’s family, huh?” Thomas said. “He is fucking family! Then he should know better and stay away from you.”

She stared at him for a moment, brow furrowed, as she seemed to put the puzzle together in her head. “Why would he stay away from me, Tom?”

He turned around to face away from her for a moment, rubbing a hand over his face. “No, no. You won’t make me feel guilty for that.”

“Make you feel guilty for what, Tommy?”

He recognized the hint of annoyance on her tone and couldn’t ignore it anymore, the alcohol giving him the courage that he had lost that day on the train station, as he turned around and shouted, “For loving you!”

She held her breath, eyes widening as she stared back at him.

Tommy continued, “Michael should stay away from you because you’re fucking mine and I love you.”

“Tommy, I’m not your property, and you know that I love you…”

“No, you don’t,” he interrupted her, making her look at him with confusion, “You don’t love me the way I love you. The way I’ve loved you since the fucking day you asked me to kiss you when you were fifteen!”

He saw her flinch before murmuring his name, trying to gain his attention but he couldn’t stop now. The truth was finally out there and he just had to go on with it, let it all out before he lost his mind.

“You said to me that it would mean nothing, that it would be just another kiss for me, but you were wrong,” Tommy said, his breaths short.

She looked bewildered, and Tommy held onto a strand of hope he didn’t even know still existed.

“That kiss meant fucking everything. From that day on, I’ve never seen you in the same way as before, because I realized I was in love with you and you didn’t feel the same. So I ignored these feelings while I saw you going out with boys, and I’ve thrown myself into fucking every girl that wasn’t you because I knew I couldn’t have you, not the way I wanted.”

Tommy didn’t notice that he was walking to her until they were just a breath apart.

“Then I found Greta, and I thought that I could forget you, but it only reminded me that you are the only one I want. I was going to break up with her, but she fell ill. You stayed by my side, and just when I thought that I would have a chance to tell you everything, the war happened and I just couldn’t. I couldn’t, because there was no way in hell that I was going to risk going to fight in France and die. I couldn’t leave you here to suffer because of me, either because you felt the same or not.”

“Tommy…” (Y/N)’s voice was all but a whisper.

He couldn’t resist anymore, his hands brought her to him, his eyes observing hers from up close, not giving her time to talk or he would lose his courage.

“I was ready to go there and die, and never let you know how I felt. But you had to give me hope that night before I was shipped off to that fucking hell. You had to…”He took a deep breath, his eyes closing for a brief second, a flood of memories making his heart race faster. “You had to give yourself to me. You had to give me a taste of what I thought I could never have, to make me want to survive the fucking war, to come back to you, and to let you know about all of these stupid feelings.”

Tommy couldn’t wait anymore. He did the one thing he had wanted to since he had returned from France—he kissed her. It wasn’t gentle or patient; no, it was urgent and filled with passion and he didn’t know how to stop, not when she wasn’t pushing him away. He devoured her as a man starved, teeth clashing and hands grabbing at anything they could touch. They were both out of breath when they finally parted.

“You said that you wanted to give me one last good memory and it was that memory that kept me alive during most of the nights when I was stuck in the fucking mud,” Thomas said.

(Y/N)’s fingers were clinging to him like her life depended on it, like she was afraid to lose him to the War again.

Tommy took the moment to let the words spill out. “The memory of you and the feeling of you under my fingers, and all around me, and the way you tasted.”

His lips brushed against hers, fingers clawing at the flesh of her hips like they had done the night before he left for France.

He backed her up against the wall, hands trailing down to the back of her thighs, picking her up and trapping her with his body.

Tommy looked straight to her eyes as he spoke again, “How you writhed under me, all the beautiful sounds you made, and I just wanted to come back to you and make some new memories.”

(Y/N) shivered at his words. She gave him just a brief second to observe the rise and fall of her chest and her expanded pupils before he felt her fingers at the back of his head, forcing him to really look at her as she said, “Then let’s work on those new memories.”

Their lips clashed again, and every doubt that he ever felt vanished for a moment. That night their bodies moved together like old acquaintances, skin sliding against skin, hands gripping at each other, lips kissing every patch of skin while chanting a sinful choir of moans and curses alongside their names.

When Tommy woke up the next day, (Y/N/N) in his arms, he realized that he was finally home.

Taglist: @captivatedbycillianmurphy, @internalmess3

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sometipsygnostalgic · 4 years ago

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something I mull over when AT crops up on my dash is, I remember when people were miffed about the episodes in the future implying that all the kingdoms will eventually fall and much of what the characters have done are for naught and i think... well, that's the point. Humanity nuked itself and ended their world. The theme continues that all things end, and must change and revive themselves; nothing lasts forever. Not relationships, not love, and not kingdoms. A gentle fading away.

The thing is, there are several episodes exploring legacy, not just PB’s legacy, but also that of other characters.

Here is a conversation from the episode Astral Plane that may peak your interest:

Finn asks if being born is the greatest act of creation, then is everything else just waiting for the end? Think of how the Candy Kingdom was born and will fall to its inevitable downfall.

GGGG says that creating his society isn’t enough, he needs to protect it. PB protects her candy kingdom through a number of methods. She is obsessed with this task.

Finn asks what it’s worth if the society falls apart. If PB’s society falls apart, then in her eyes, her life was for nothing. That was her perspective at this part of the show.

GGGG responds with action - immediately sacrificing himself in order to preserve his legacy.

If we examine PB’s response to threats that propose the end of the world, sometimes they are a lot worse, like mounting up armed forces and getting into conflict. But inside and outside of those conflicts, she usually puts herself on the front lines. Like Something Big, or the battle against the Vampire King, or against GOLB, where she was prepared to handle the conflict herself, even if it seemed impossible and came at high risk of her death. And I think we should recall the episode Reign of Gunthers, wherein she was prepared to just... make bottles for eternity if it meant Gunther wouldn’t end the kingdom. Peebles will get her hands dirty and put herself at risk of death to protect her creations.

But she’s also made several preparations for Future Ooo, that are leaked across the show - she is very determined to preserve her legacy even if Ooo goes KaBOOM, which is something she rightfully fears is inevitable.

This is primarily seen in the episode “High Strangeness”. Peebles has created rocket ships to make new candy kingdoms across the galaxy. She feels bad for keeping this a secret, but she thinks Ooo’s going to hell, and this is the only way to guarantee that her “eternal empire” will live on.

Then let’s look at the Graybles 1000+ future you propose: When we first see the future Candy Kingdom, it appears to have been destroyed. This would match up with what you said - PB never learned from her mistakes, and ended up going to a war that resulted in the CK’s destruction, leaving all of her work futile because everything still happens in cycles.

But, in the episode Graybles 1000+, while everything stays, it still changes. The candy kingdom is abandoned, not bombed out. Bubblegum’s society has not been destroyed - she saved it!!!

She saved the candy people by putting them in stasis, and running from whatever conflict was at risk of destroying the kingdom. And her sacrifice is she has to stay awake and find a new home for the candy people, while under threat from Gibbon and the Ice Thing, the latter who has kidnapped her in the intro.

The poetry here is that Bonnie’s kingdom was unable to maintain itself in the state she wanted it to. She wasn’t able to keep her eternal empire. But she was able to keep her legacy going, to survive, and look after her people. And she did this by withdrawing. Instead of putting everything against the Pup Kingdom, and fighting a losing battle, she did something different and retreated.

I also want to talk about her perspective in the finale, and in Obsidian. As of “High Strangeness”, it’s pretty clear Bubblegum thinks her kingdom is going to collapse no matter what, so she should make preparations for that day. She’s coming to terms with how it’s impossible to protect it forever, and trying to do so was driving her crazy. After the finale, where she nearly died in the battle against GOLB, PB resolves to take another step back from the kingdom. It’s a leap of faith. She wants to spend her best life with Marceline, no matter how short or long that time is. In Obsidian, Marcie and Peebles think they’re going to die at one point, but they spent that time with each other. The songs “Monster” and “Eternity with You” make it clear that they have no idea how long they will last, but if they spend that time with each other, it will have been well done. And I’ll take from this that even though PB and Marcy might get tragically separated in the future, they’ll be satisfied for having lived together in the moment.

So, Peebles taking a step back from her kingdom to work on her personal life goes along nicely with what you were saying. What’s the point of spending your entire life on a project that will inevitably collapse and leaves you dying alone and unhappy? Isn’t that a waste of time? Isn’t it better to live for yourself, even if it makes you feel like you have less control if a crisis does emerge?

But this doesn’t mean the act of creation was pointless, nor that the act of maintaining the kingdom is wrong either.

Bubblegum’s more extensive moral compromises, such as attempting to spy on everyone, and micromanaging her citizens, were wrong. It was trying to prepare for a threat that cannot be predicted or prepared against. She was constantly validated in this behaviour by Finn and Jake going missing in Lady & Peebles, or the fire kingdom hiding nukes in The Cooler, or the lich returning, or Peace Master making threats in Nemesis. But if she has to compromise so much of herself to look after the kingdom that the citizens themselves are struggling to live freely and are becoming scared of her, what is the point? She’s sacrificing her “humanity” when it might not do her any good in the end.

Making soldiers and having non-invasive contingency plans, however, are a fantastic idea. Improving defenses, Saving as many people as you can without compromising your morals or their dignity.

That’s what she does. And yes, she still takes some moral shortcuts, even at the end of the show. But she no longer does anything like in season 6, and is a lot better as a ruler for it - being able to make the decision to withdraw from an unwinnable battle in the late future, even if it means her people can’t re-establish their kingdom for hundreds of years.

#adventure time #long post

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cannoli-reader · 11 months ago

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And why does he talk about Ilyena? Because he fucking killed her. Rand's post-Two Rivers romantic life began with being woken from a dream of two girls he was crushing on (in which he started to rot alive, after hurting the feelings of his nominal love interest), to a smoking hot noblewoman attempting to seduce him ... and a bubble of evil almost gave them both a death by a thousand cuts. Then one of his crushes stopped in to try to help him with one of the biggest problems in his life ... and he lost control of the Power, which included a violation of her person and stripping her of any means of self-defense, while causing fires and explosions. Then a Forsaken shows up to throw her hat into the ring ... and a Gray Man penetrates the layers of security around him and gets into his rooms, and they don't notice until it's almost too late.

His love life for the series commences with a three-fold revelation of how dangerous Rand al'Thor all by himself is to women with whom he shares a mutual attraction (which he does with Lanfear & Berelain, if not any other kind). The visit with Lanfear was the first manifestation of which he is aware of Lews Therin creeping in, and "LTT" talks without Rand's consent.

Rand's fear is Lews Therin taking over. Rand's fear is Lews Therin repeating the act which drove him insane when he became aware of it, only on Elayne, Aviendha or Min. He tells Min at one point that he'll tear off his own arm before hurting her, and down the line, when "LTT" does the thing he's most afraid of, - seizing control of the Power and using it in opposition to Rand's will - Rand then, the next time he is going into potential danger with Min at his side, refuses to embrace saidin, on the off-chance it happens again, and loses his hand as a result. Because that's better than "Lews Therin" using the Power to kill Min the way he killed Ilyena.

For the record, the other two have to be working with similar fears. The first time Perrin really linked up with a wolf was Hopper, moments before he was killed, and the empathy and intimacy it created in Perrin drove him to murder two men for no good reason. A year later, the first time the wolves actually fight for Perrin, he loses control to the wolf pack mind, and embraces their psychotic hatred of a Neverborn, going after it with no regard for his safety. Not too long after that, he meets a man who has lost his humanity to his wolf powers. So Perrin thinks he could end up being taken over by a mind that acts in ways he believes he would not otherwise choose, just like Rand.

Similarly, Mat doesn't trust alien forces in his head. He has already had the experience of the Old Blood, which he said he didn't like, and right after that, met Mordeth, and was subsequently told that Mordeth could have taken over his body had Mat let his desire for the treasure lead him into cooperating. As it was, he was infected with the ruby dagger, which has destroyed parts of his mind, losing memories and experiences. When he turns to the Aelfinn and Eelfinn for solutions, he gets the adventurers' memories, in response to his request to fill the holes in his memory. These new memories have literally replaced his life and mind! He lost a piece of himself and got this instead. Absolutely nothing about either of his encounters with the 'finn gives him any reason to think they are dealing in any sort of good faith or benevolence. Just because they don't initially present as malicious does not mean the memories will not turn out to be some sort of poisoned gift like the ruby dagger. It's why Mat Cauthon, whose first reaction to learning that a friend, or someone his friend cares for, is in danger, is plunge after them, flails and refuses when Thom asks for his help rescuing Moiraine - because the 'finn might be able to use whatever was done to him against his friends. Just like Rand and "LTT".

Contra the knee-jerk reader reaction, borne at least in part by a subconscious assumption of Protagonist Armor, to each of the three ta'veren, their coolest "power" represents both the abstract horror of losing their identity and sense of self, and the practical danger of harming their loved ones. It's not that they don't appreciate the benefits or get overly agitated about a minor inconvenience, it's that the thing that gives them the most ability to make a positive difference in the world, also represents the greatest danger they can cause.

#wheel of time #rand al'thor #mat cauthon #perrin aybara #wolfbrother #Eelfinn memories #Lews Therin in his head #themes are NOT just for 8th grade book reports

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justinalovee · 4 years ago

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Empty souls

1.03

Previous chapter

“Clarke! I need Clarke!” Murphy yelled loud as he could, waiting for the gates to open.

Murphy ran fast as could through the forest back to the base, while carrying Jill who was bleeding in his arms. He had grown more worried as she had stopped talking five minutes earlier. At least when Jill was cursing he knew she was awake.

“What the hell happened?” Clarke asked as Finn helped Murphy lay Jill onto a metal table once inside the drop-ship.

“Oh, we went dancing downtown.” He said, pointing towards the arrow sticking out of his friend's shoulder. “Grounders.” Murphy corrected, seeing the glare the blonde was giving him.

“She’s gone pale and lost a lot of blood.” Clarke places the back of her palm against her forehead. “We need to get her temperature down and to do a transfusion...but we don’t have any blood bags down here.” Clarke informed them.

“Take my blood.” Murphy said, rolling up his sleeve. He needed Jill to survive, he couldn’t do this without. “Well, don’t just stand there, do something!”

Clarke nodded. “Finn, go get me a needle. Murphy, you should cover her up, but keep her shoulder free. I’ll see if I can get any cold water.” Before she left, Clarke tide ripped up rags around her bleeding shoulder.

Murphy watched as both Finn and Clarke left the room. His lips went into a fine line as he brushed strands of hair out of her face. It would pissed Jill off that her hair was on show. Murphy covered up her nearly naked torso with his jacket and finished pulling her jeans up. When Jill was shot, she only had her bra on, with her jeans only halfway up her legs.

“Wow. I guess the rumors are true then.” Finn said as he entered the room again.

Clarke followed behind with a bucket of water. She glanced at Jill, whose light purple hair was tainted red with blood. “I didn’t think it was possible to have hair that color” Clarke said stepping closer to Jill to get a better look.

Murphy frowned. “Nobody mentions it.”

Clarke gulped down. “Finn, press this against her wound. I can’t promise this will work, but I will try everything I can.” Clarke said, before she tied a piece of string around Murphy’s arm.

“Please Clarke, just do anything you can.” Murphy practically.

Please don’t die.

______

A horrible stinging feeling in Jill's shoulder woke her. She felt as if her body was burning from the inside out. What happened? She had a vague memory of hearing Bellamy Blake yelling at Clarke, before telling her he would ‘fix this’.

“John?” She groaned. The Last thing she remembered was getting dressed by the small lake.

Murphy sprung to her side. “How are you feeling?”

Jill couldn’t help but notice how awful he looked. Murphy was covered in dried blood, his arms were bruised. He looked exhausted.

“I’m okay.” Jill said, shrugging her shoulders, which she instantly regretted. “What happened?”

“A grounder shot you in the shoulder and caused you to lose a lot of blood... I thought I was going to lose you, Jill. You had me worried, I thought I was going to lose you for good.” Murphy whispered.

“I’m struggling to remember.”

Murphy felt a pang of pain in his chest. This was all his fault, if he hadn’t taken her to lake none of this would have been happening.

Jill glanced up at his sad face before reaching out and stroking his cheek. Murphy leaned down to kiss her forehead. But Jill captures his lips with her own.

“I’m glad you are feeling better.” Bellamy grunted. “Murphy, we need to go before it gets dark.” He said in a flat tone.

“What? Why are you going?” Jill asked, panicked.

Murphy linked his fingers with hers and sighed. He was thankful Clarke had our Jill’s hat back on before she left. “We need to go on another hunting trip, we are running low on food.”

Jill frowned, “you better be careful John.”

Murphy kissed her on the forehead and nose. “I’ll be discreet, okay? Just stay alive here for me.”

“Come on John, we haven’t got all day.” Bellamy said, glancing at Murphy.

Jill was only on her own for a short while before Clarke came to check up on her. Jill wasn’t certain what was more painful, her wound getting cleaned or watching Wells mop over the blonde while she drooled over Finn.

______

Bellamy glanced around to make sure nobody was in earshot of him and Murphy. “So what’s the deal with Jill’s purple hair?”

Murphy grunted as a response. Fucking Clarke and Finn couldn’t keep their mouths shut.

“I’ll just ask her instead,” Bellamy shrugged.

“Don’t.”

Bellamy stopped walking and glared at him. “You either tell me or I’ll ask the butcher queen myself.”

Murphy snapped. “Fine. Her mom took experimental drugs while she was pregnant and it caused Jill’s hair to turn purple, but after she was born the ark kept running tests on her.”

“Why do you care so much?” Bellamy asked. He was curious why a selfish person like Murphy would risk his life for Jill.

“We were good friends.” Murphy shrugged nonchalantly.

“That didn’t answer my question.”

“We needed each other, okay? Neither of us had anybody for a long time on the ark. It was just us.”

Bellamy began walking at a slower pace again. He couldn’t imagine caring about somebody so much who wasn’t family.

______

“Steph, wait!”

Jill shouted as she ran after the younger girl. She still felt dizzy from laying down for so long, but nobody else was going after the redhead.

“You need to stop, Stephanie! You're going to get yourself killed!”

Finally, the younger girl stopped running, Jill caught her breath before moving to yell again. Except she couldn’t. A large hand covered her mouth and pulled her backwards at the same time a spear went through Steph’s body. Jill tried to scream as she watched the bloodied body fall to the ground.

“Don’t say a word.” Bellamy whispered into her ear as he dragged her away. He had noticed her running in the opposite direction as he reached the camp's gate.

Jill fought against him at first. She wanted to save Steph. Why not? They had pulled Jasper back from death's door.

“What the fuck is going on?” Murphy asked as he stepped towards them, with Miller behind him.

Bellamy let go of Jill, who glared at him before storming into camp. The three of them looked at each other before following her.

“Harrison! You son of a bitch!” Jill hissed.

Harrison smirked at her as she shoved him with her one good arm, which amused him further. “You can’t get enough of me, can you, darling?”

“Fuck You!” Jill hissed before slapping him across the face. “Steph is dead because of you!”

“Wha...what?” He asked as his smile faltered.

“Because if you and your stupid prank she ran into the woods sacred and the grounders got her.”

Harrison put his hand on Jill’s bad shoulder, provoking her to let out a loud whine. “It’s not my fault she was stupid enough to run into the forest! It’s just a shame they didn’t spear you! You guard fucking-”

Jill cut him off by kneeing him in the stomach, making him crumble to the ground.

“Don’t even think about it.” Murphy said in a warning tone as Harrison got back on his feet. “Jill come on, you need to get your shoulder looked at.”

Bellamy was impressed. Jill could take down Harrison with only one arm. He glanced around wondering if anybody else in the camp was impressed by that performance as well. It might benefit him if Jill was on his side.

______

“What happened?” Murphy asked as they returned to his tent.

Jill could feel stray tears falling from her eyes. This reminded her of Charlie. “That prick Harrison knew she was scared of spiders. He had been collecting them and flung them all on her at once. She freaked out and ran away...I should have stopped her.”

“This isn’t on you. What happened to Steph wasn’t your fault.”

“So...what’s your take on all of this? The grounders, radiation, deadly animals.” Jill asked, changing the subject.

“I think that our people are probably the most dangerous here. Do you want me to help bring your stuff to my tent?” Murphy asked.

Jill nodded. It wasn’t even a question if she would stay with him or not. Murphy wouldn’t have accepted a no from her, and she realized this. He didn’t trust all the others in the camp, especially Harrison.

______

Bellamy had a conundrum. He had been watching Jill and knew he needed her to help run the camp. She wasn’t emotional like Clarke, or opinionated like Finn, and didn’t have his hot head temper. Jill would balance them out.

He had heard the whispers in camp, some were questioning if following Wells and Clarke was a better option. Having a badass like Jill could aid his cause.

“You seem distracted. What are you thinking about?”

Bellamy turned to face Roma who was sprawled out naked on his bed. He liked Roma, she was happy with no strings attached fun.

“How low on food we are getting.” He said. It was a lie, but he couldn’t tell her the truth. He was sure telling Roma he was thinking about another female would cause some kind of physical pain. “Can you gather another hunting group ready now?”

“The usual people?”

Bellamy nodded. Roma got dressed as he pondered his next move. He would need to get Jill on her own, so he could talk to her. Dragging her away from Murphy would be a challenge

Next chapter

#The 100 #the 100 fandom #the 100 fanfiction #john murphy #bellamy blake #John Murphy/oc #Bellamy Blake/oc #the 100 imagine #clarke griffin #finn collins #grounders #john murphy imagine

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liviakomtrikru20 · 4 years ago

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I Love You, Gypsy Eyes Chapter 1: Welcome Back to Birmingham

My eyes hurt. My brain hurts. “Jesus Christ, Polly I think…no scratch that, I know that Arthur has mucked up the books again.” I walk back into the betting den still staring confused and frustrated at the mess of numbers in front of me. I am met with stillness, then I hear someone say “Liv?” I look up for a second and then back down to the books. Whoa! Wait a minute! My head snaps back up and there in front of me was someone I never thought I would see again. Michael Gray.

Polly, Esme and Finn are standing around him, all dead silent, watching at me. I take notice that there is a girl standing next to him too. A tall, slender, blonde haired woman with porcelain looking skin. She really is beautiful and glamorous with her fur coat and designer handbag that she is carrying. I look at her and “see” something off about her.

My “sight” always shows me a person’s aura. I’ve had the gift of “sight” since I was a little one. It came in handy when meeting strangers while on our travels across the land. My mother was blessed with “sight” as well. My older sister Esme, not so much. She is like Polly, she can read one’s palm, see their future. I’ve let her read my palm, but I told her not to tell me what she foresees, good or bad.

I continue to stand there, still, shell shocked almost. I really did not think I would ever see him again. It has been almost five years since he abruptly left me here in Small Heath with no word or explanation. He just disappeared off to America, never to see or hear from him again. I was so angry with him. Angry with Polly and Tommy for sending him off without telling me. Tommy refused to give me his contact information initially and I thought about making the trip over to the Americas myself to find him, but in my condition at the time it just was not possible.

My pregnancy was miserable. I was violently ill for most of it. Eventually I became very swollen and dizzy with high blood pressure. The doctor put me on bed rest for 3 months. The bedrest on top of the stress of losing Michael finally gave way and I had a breakdown.

After Aurora was born, I was not myself. I loved my beautiful baby girl, but I was just so low and numb. I could barely function, let alone take care of a newborn. Luckily, I had the Shelby family to help me through that first year. Their love and support for me and Aurora is what truly kept us both alive. I still feel an extreme amount of guilt for the way I handled everything during my pregnancy and after Aurora was born.

I was so scared when Michael left, I found out I was 12 weeks pregnant and it was my worst nightmare. I always figured we would have children sooner or later, at least until after our wedding in October that year, but the wedding never came.

Polly begged me to tell Michael that I was expecting, but we both knew I couldn’t. Yes, the family, especially Tommy, was furious that Michael had not warned Tommy about the trap Luca Changretta set up for him. The whole family felt betrayed. Not that I blame them, I did too.

Michael was ultimately safer in America. Away from the Peaky Blinders life and I knew that. He could go to America, start over and live the life he was always meant to live. Michael being happy and safe was all that mattered to me. I loved him and I wanted what was best for him even if it hurt like hell to let him go.

After Esme and John were married, I decided to move to Birmingham with my sister to help keep her company and watch over her. I had never been without my sister before and could not imagine us being separated from one another. She initially felt guilty about me having to move to Small Heath because of her. She knew how much I loved the outdoors. How much I loved the traveler life that we had lived as children. Never knowing where we would be this time tomorrow. Just focusing on the here and now. However, I loved my sister dearly and ended up following her to Birmingham. Initially, there definitely was an adjustment period, but the Shelby’s had made the transition much easier. Especially once Michael finally came around.

I am standing there soundless, still and I am fairly sure my mouth is hanging wide open catching flies. Was this really happening? “Michael?” I gasp out finally. I had only dreamed of this every night before I went to sleep for years, but something feels off. The aura I am seeing doesn’t seem right. Looking at Esme’s face confirms my suspicions.

Michael looks just as stunned and flustered as I do. His eyes wide, nostrils flared, jaw clenched. Words both escaping us and apparently everyone else in the room as well. Well great.

Finally, I can gather my thoughts, “Hi,” I say with a forced smile. Hi? Really? That is all you could come up with. “You’re here? When did you get here?” The blonde stranger speaks now, “Just now. Been traveling for 15 days to get…here.” She looks around with disgust. Who the hell is this woman?

“Hello, I’m so sorry I didn’t catch your name. I’m Liv,” I say with a sweet, but forced tone. The woman is now hanging off Michael’s arm. She arches her brow at me, then narrows her eyes. “I’m Gina. Gina Gray,” she pronounces smugly with a smirk. And just like that all of the air has been sucked out of my lungs. Great, he is married. The love of my life is married.

I feel my heart drop. I want to throw up. Tears threatening to sting my eyes. As if this day cannot get any worse. Arthur’s mucked up the books and Michael has finally returned, but with a dream trophy wife. The tension in the air is thick and everyone in the den can feel it.

Eventually, Polly goes to say something to break the silence, but all of the sudden a little voice happily exclaims, “Mummy!” A dark-curly haired, blue eyed girl comes running through the door towards me. “Mummy, look what Uncle Arthur got me!”

The little girl dances and twirls around in a beautiful, green floral dress, grinning from ear to ear. I crouch down to the little girl and embrace her, kissing the side of her head. “You look so beautiful darling. How nice of Uncle Arthur.” Arthur enters the den with a big smile on his face. He adores Aurora, even though him and Linda have their own child, Billy Shelby. I can tell Arthur has been wanting another baby for a while. A baby girl.

“Eh, Liv,” Arthur states bashfully. He knows Aurora has him wrapped around her finger. “We was just taking a walk and Rora wanted to go to the toy shop, but I told her that you wouldn’t like me buying any more toys for her. That she had enough. So Rora asked if she could get the pretty green dress in the shop window down the street that we had seen earlier instead. Everyone needs clothes right Liv?” He smiles. I could tell Arthur was a little nervous. He knows how I feel about Aurora being spoiled. It’s fine in small doses, but she has so many people that love and care for her that sometimes it is just a revolving door of gifts. I taught my daughter well didn’t I?

“She looks beautiful Arthur, really. Thank you.” I look down at Aurora, she is now grinning from ear to ear at Arthur. It warms my heart to see her loved so much by her family.

Finally, Aurora looks back over to me, points her finger in the opposite direction towards the two strangers and says questioningly, “Mummy who are they?”

#peaky blinders #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinder #michael gray #michael gray x original female character #polly gray #arthur shelby #esme shelby #john shelby #finn shelby #gina gray #tommy shelby

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merakiaes · 5 years ago

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How To Get The Girl - Finn Shelby

Pairing: Finn Shelby x reader

Requested: Yes.

Prompts: #65 and #66 from the fluff-list.

Warnings/notes: It’s 2.30am and I’m running on no sleep so if this is shit and really boring, I’m sorry. I’ll probably go in a re-write it tomorrow.

Wordcount: 2595

Summary: Some bad flirting and a piece of advice leading to Finn landing a date.

Whether or not you were new to Small Heath or just passing through, Finn didn’t know. The only thing he knew for certain, was that your beauty was unlike anything he had ever seen in his life; completely incomparable.

You had been coming to the Garrison every night for the past week to drink with your brothers. Or, at least he guessed they were your brothers. You all had the same colored hair, the same facial structures, and very similar laughs.

You seemed to be far too close to be just friends, but at the same time, not close in the same way you would a romantic interest, which only left the sibling-alternative.

Finn had lost track of the conversation at hand with his brothers and friends, their voices and laughs practically falling to deaf ears as he stared at you from across the room while sipping his whiskey.

Arthur finally seemed to catch on to his little brother’s unusual silence, however, shoving an elbow into his side, rather roughly in his drunken haze and asking loudly. “What’s got you so distracted tonight, eh, Finn boy?”

Finn glared at him and kept quiet, turning his gaze back to you. But when he didn’t give him an answer himself, Isaiah took it upon himself to give it for him.

“It’s that girl! He’s been pining after her ever since she came in the first time on Monday. Not that I blame him, she’s fucking magnificent.”

Arthur and John each let out a drunk yell, scooting closer to their youngest brother and putting their arms around his shoulder almost in perfect sync. “There’s a fine looking lass.” Arthur agreed.

But John only let out a loud laugh, ruffling his hair around while shaking his head. “Not a chance. Fancy girls like her don’t go for boys like us. She’s born from money, that one.”

Polly snorted from where she sat on the opposite side of the table, raising an eyebrow at her nephew. “And how would you possibly know that?”

John waved a hand in your direction, where you were laughing carelessly to something your brothers had said, having no clue in the slightest to the conversation currently going on behind your back.

“Look at the diamonds around her neck and listen to the accent of the company she’s in.” He said, shaking his head again with a teasing smile playing at his lips as he took a drag of his cigar. “Those are London boys. And you were born in the slums. Don’t get your hopes up.”

His discouraging words drew a scoff from Polly, but she chose to stay out of further conversation, knowing she would without a doubt lose her temper otherwise.

Instead, Tommy chose this as his time to join in, sitting up in his chair and putting out his cigarette, blowing out the final drag of smoke before speaking.

“Well, he’s also a Shelby.” He noted, looking at John, before turning to Finn and taking that back of his neck in his hand. “And since when have us Shelbys had any trouble in finding women, eh? All he needs is a little boost.”

With that, he gave him a small shake and then proceeded to tell him what he needed to do to get your attention.

No matter how hard he tried to be, he wasn’t his brothers. He had their charm, without a doubt. But the difference between them and him was that they knew how to use it, and he was absolutely fucking clueless.

At nineteen years old, he wasn’t a virgin. But the only girl he had ever slept with was the whore his brothers had hired for him on his eighteenth birthday.

He had told Tommy when reporting back that very same night that he never wanted it like that again, and he had stuck by it, not having felt a woman’s touch since. Barely even held a conversation with one, if you didn’t count his aunt and brothers’ wives.

John, Arthur and Isaiah let him in on their tips and tricks, as well, giving him examples of lines and words that could be used to ‘lure any lady in’. Some of the things they told him to do and say seemed absolutely bizarre, but what did he know?

Their biggest mistake, however? Not telling him in which context the different lines should have been used.

He probably should’ve been able to figure that out himself, but like earlier mentioned, he hadn’t had much practice on the subject of women and quite frankly, he wasn’t like his brothers at all personality-wise.

Rather than being loud, daring and fierce, he was soft, shy and careful, and when finally having gathered the courage to walk up to you at the bar, really fucking nervous, which was probably what fucked the entire thing up.

He could practically feel himself dying from shame when he slid up beside you with an overly cocky smirk, speaking out: “Rumor has it, I make you nervous,” like his brother’s had advised him to, only to get little to no reaction back.

It wasn’t an unusual occurrence for you to be approached on a night out, quite the opposite really; you honestly got more surprised nowadays if you weren’t approached by at least one man.

You didn’t know what it was that made them think you would ever be interested when they delivered such bad pick-up lines, just like this one.

You admired them for the attempts, but never gave them much of a response, and this time was no different, as you simply snorted at the lame line.

But when you turned your head to the side to turn him down like you did every other guy and caught sight of his face, your attitude shifted in an instance.

Unlike the cocky, overly confident boys you were used to, this was not one of them.

Sure, he still sported a cocky smirk on his lips. But his eyes were so insecure and soft, going together perfectly with his innocent, freckled face, and instantly caught your attention.

So, rather than shooting him down like you had originally been planning, you twisted your body to face him, completely forgetting about the drinks your brothers had sent you to retrieve.

You raised an eyebrow. “Are you flirting with me?”

His smirk instantly widened, but it faltered slightly every once in a while, showing you clearly that this wasn’t something he usually did. “That depends, is it working?”

His voice was casual and sure, but his nervous face betrayed the entire act of confidence he had put on.

“Well, I have to be frank.” You chuckled, tilting your head to the side slightly. “Your skills of seducing a woman are absolutely shite and I usually don’t care for boys who strike up a conversation by tooting their own horn, but you’re cute and you seem nervous, so I’ll let it slide.”

He obviously hadn’t been expecting you to talk back with such ease, his smirk falling in a matter of seconds and his freckled face taking on a pink tint. He began sputtering for a response, and you couldn’t help but throw your head back in a laugh.

“Oh, the fearless mettle disappeared just like that, did it?” You questioned, amusement evident in your voice, and he must’ve taken it as if you were mocking him because the next second, his face had taken a sour turn.

“I’m not nervous.” He defended, but the intensifying blush on his cheeks told you different.

“No?” You raised an eyebrow, giving him a lopsided smile. “Then how come you still haven’t offered to buy me drink?”

“I don’t have to buy you a drink. My brother owns the place.” He was quick to reply this time, actually shocking you but still causing you to laugh a genuine laugh that pulled all the way to your eyes.

“Does that line usually work on girls?” You asked, and instantly he turned flustered again.

“No.” He disagreed, stuttering over his words. “I mean, I don’t really talk to girls much.”

You snorted, raising an eyebrow. “You don’t say.”

The blush on his cheeks deepened even further at your sarcastic remark, and you were starting to feel guilty.

He obviously had no idea what to do in the situation he was currently in and although it shocked you to even say it, you found him interesting and didn’t want to scare him away.

So you dropped the sarcastic act, putting on a genuine smile and chuckling lightly. “Relax, I’m just having a bit of fun.” You comforted him, now in a tone much softer than before, sticking your hand out. “I’m (Y/N). What’s your name?”

His entire body seemed to relax at the sight of your outstretched hand, shoulders slumping and a small breath escaping from between his lips.

He took a moment to react, before reaching out and taking your hand in his, shaking it carefully. “Finn. Finn Shelby.”

His hand was softer than you had expected it to be. Your brothers were all hard workers, all having served in the war. Their hands were rough and scarred and calloused. Bit Finn’s hand was smooth, indicating that he had yet to put in any hard labor in life.

And you found yourself liking that.

“Well, Finn Shelby, let me ask you something.” You said once he had let go of your hand again, licking your lips and leaning in a bit closer, peeking a glance at the table at the other side of the room that you had seen him sitting at before, and where its occupants were obviously trying to listen in without looking too obviously – and failing miserably at the latter. “Is it your brothers who taught you how to flirt? Because they didn’t do a very good job.”

He glanced over at said brothers just like you had, before turning back to look at you, a sheepish expression now settled on his face. “It usually works better for them.” He admitted lowly. “But as soon as I try anything they do, I mess up.”

Your eyebrows furrowed slightly at that.

You got the feeling he wasn’t just talking about the flirting, and you found yourself puzzled about this boy. Not even five minutes into meeting each other and he was already, in a way, talking about his feelings; oversharing.

But you found it sweet. A guy that wasn’t overly masculine on a toxic level and could talk about his emotion was something this cruel world needed a lot more of in your opinion.

There was nothing attractive about men who couldn’t own up to the person they were on the inside. In fact, those were usually the ones who grew up to be the really bad ones.

“That’s because you’re not them.” You answered, shrugging with a smile. “A piece of advice? You need to adapt to your own personality, use your own personal charm to your advantage, and not try to mimic someone else’s.”

He laughed at that; a genuine laugh that didn’t seemed as forced as everything else up until that point. “I wish they would have given me the same advice.”

“Well, their advice might not have done you very good, but you still got me hooked, didn’t you?” Your flirty attitude turned back on just like that, and when yours did, so did his, but this time in a natural way.

He raised an eyebrow, adjusting himself where he was leaning against the bar so that he was more comfortable. “Did I?”

“What would you do if I said yes?” You asked, raising an eyebrow to match his own, to which his grin only widened.

“I would ask you on a date.”

Your lips trembled and you had to force yourself to keep your calm in order to not break into a full smile.

“And when and where would this date take place?” You hummed, your head that had previously already been spinning with the alcohol you had consumed throughout the night now spinning even more with the buzz of the excitement you were surprisingly feeling by talking to him.

“Seven o’clock tomorrow night.” He answered, not even taking a second to think about it, shocking both you and seemingly himself as he caught himself and slowed down with a sheepish smile. “Dinner, a movie at the pictures, and then back here where I would introduce you to my brothers.”

You snickered, leaning your chin on the palm of your hands and narrowing your eyes slightly at him. “Taking me to meet your family already on the first date?” You teased. “You sure do move quickly, don’t you?”

Much to your surprise, he didn’t blush at your teasing this time, instead just giving you an equally as teasing smile back. “Just using my own personal charm to my advantage.”

Your eyebrows shot up, your confidence faltering for a slight moment as he was now beginning to take control. “And using my own words against me. You drive a hard bargain.”

He took a slow step closer to you, and whether or not it was intentional, you could admit you felt heat rise to your cheeks when his fingers brushed against yours at the surface of the bar.

You glanced down at your touching fingers briefly and he did the same, before looking back up at you with questioning eyes. “Is that a yes?”

You didn’t get the time to answer before your oldest brother called out your name from your table. You threw a look over your shoulder, noticing they were all now standing up and beginning to get into their jackets, without a doubt tired of waiting for the drinks you were supposed to bring them some five minutes ago.

“Just a minute!” You yelled back at them, hurriedly turning back to Finn who was now looking at you expectantly.

You bit your lip, looking around at the bar and luckily spotting a newspaper and a ballpoint pen lying around within reaching distance.

You stretched your arm out and grabbed them, clicked the pen and started scribbling your address in the corner of the first page with as clear letters you possibly could.

Your brothers had now started heading past you and out the door, and the oldest one – the same that had called for you – had stopped behind you with your jacket slung over his arm, waiting for you to finish.

You clicked the pen and put it down at the bar, carefully ripped the corner with your address written on it off and folded it in two before pushing yourself off the bar.

Finn did the same and stuffed his hands in his pockets as he watched your brother help you into your jacket wordlessly, respectfully minding his own business and not intervening.

Once you had gotten situated in your coat and pulled your hair back out from under the collar, you reached the note out for Finn to take.

He took it with a small smile, and you returned it with a smile twice as wide.

“It was nice meeting you, Finn Shelby, and I look forward to seeing you again tomorrow.” You grinned and leaned in to plant a kiss on his cheek.

His skin was warm against your lips, no doubt from being flustered from your entire interaction.

And your little finishing touch did nothing to calm his racing heart, having him even more flustered than he had been before when you walked out with your brother in tow, leaving him to go back to his own brothers with the good news.

#finn shelby #finn shelby imagine #finn shelby x reader #Peaky Blinders #peaky blinders x reader #peaky blinder imagine #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinder headcanon #tommy shelby #arthur shelby #john shelby #ada shelby #ada thorne #michael gray #polly gray

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spotsuns · 5 years ago

Text

redemption poem

when you get down on the ground the first thing you do is turn to your brother and smile. this isn’t a victory for you, and you have so much left to pay, but at least he is safe. you’ve always done it all for him; this is just the final act.

this is the part where the audience claps because you were brave, because you sacrificed yourself for his happiness. nobody will remember that you were your own child. nobody will remember what you lost.

they’ll see it as a victory; that at least one of you is not rotten. it’s a fair trade in the eyes of the people. you’re disposable.

the handcuffs they put on you feel like redemption and you don’t know why. you could have sworn you never did anything wrong to end up here—so why, then?

the water is all muddy. it’s all started to blend together. you’re just tired. you just want it to be over, that’s it. you’ve betrayed yourself. go directly to jail. do not pass go. do not collect two-hundred dollars.

you stare at your brother from the back of the police car until he’s too far away to see anymore. you become sharply aware of the fact that this is how it will be from now on. you try not to think about waking up to him in your arms in the forest; in your grandparents guest bed; in a tent in california; on a cliff; watching the arizona sunrise—

he’s shaking you awake, telling you to look at it, that it’s beautiful, and all you can do is agree. yeah. good call.

when you look out the window at it now it just hurts your one good eye. you better take it in for all it’s worth, though. who knows when you’ll see it next like this? whole, and not sliced up into slivers by the bars of your jail cell, spreading none of its warmth across your skin.

you feel like you’ve lost more than you had when you were walking in the scorching nevada desert with blisters on your skin. and it’s true. at least you had hope left, then.

this isn’t such a big story, one where there’s a light at the end, where you come out victorious and make it to the magicland. this one has you willingly heading into the dark cave and knowing it will be a long time before you find your way back home.

you’ll be in the sequel, maybe, where you’ll be reunited with all the old characters that helped you along the way. they’ll be older and wiser and they’ll have moved on without you, because that was a part of the story you weren’t in.

you hope your sacrifice helped people, at least. that maybe your absence did more good than harm. that you were the hero, somehow. it hurts too much to stomach if you weren’t.

fifteen years is what you get. they tell you you’re lucky that it’s ‘only’ fifteen years.

you just turned seventeen. you’ll have lived almost your entire lifetime over by the time you’re free again, you’ll be a fully-grown man, and so will daniel.

so will daniel.

suddenly, it hits you. you’re going to miss everything.

those talks between the glass won’t ever be enough. you are going to miss your brother growing up, and that hurts even worse than missing out on your own growing up, because that’s what all of this was for.

you threw your childhood away the second you took off with him in your arms. you expected to get to hang onto it. you didn’t. there’s no getting it back.

you don’t want to look back at him when the officers lead you away in handcuffs. it feels too painfully familiar, too much like the time you looked out the police car window as you were pulled away from him the first time.

you didn’t want to admit it, but you were a little hopeful then. not anymore, no, that was crushed flat under the gavel. you pretend you don’t hear daniel wailing when the door shuts.

fifteen years is a long time.

in your first fifteen years of life you were born to two parents, you met lyla, you got a little brother, your mother left, you went to school, you went to work, you went to parties, to concerts, on trips with your family—it all went by pretty damn fast.

that’s childhood though, right? or is it? you can’t remember what being a child is like anymore, not these days. the last time was maybe in humboldt county, smoking weed around a campfire with a bunch of kids who had forgotten, too.

it’s funny, really. you got so caught up in the turmoil of losing your childhood that you didn’t even consider the idea that they’d take your adulthood from you, too. you’ll spend all of your twenties in a prison cell, get out at thirty-two, and then what? you’ll still be a child, chewed up and spit out by the system and thrown into the world a shell of who you once were to figure it out.

fifteen years is a long time, but time starts to not matter so much after the first few years. you think about those eight months on the road every single day that they get farther away. it seemed so awful then, and it was, but you can’t help but think you’d do it all over again over this.

that’s a selfish thought, though. you realize this when daniel visits you—his cheeks fuller, his clothes new and clean and no bags under his eyes. he tells you about school and his new dog and what his friends have been up to lately. every once in a while, he whispers to you about somebody he helped recently, or a school bus he stopped from going off a cliff. you remember this is why you’re here.

the only thing that keeps you somewhat sane when daniel’s not visiting is art. you’re allowed to have paper and anything that’s not too sharp to draw with, and you make the best of it.

you can’t do studies anymore, not in here. that’d be awfully depressing, so you draw what keeps your head up. you draw for daniel, mostly. comics of superwolf, showcasing all of his acts of heroism. it’s the best way you can show him that you’re proud.

he cries almost every time you pull out a new piece of paper for him; holds it in his hands so carefully, as if he’s convinced it’ll crumble to dust like a dead leaf in his palm if he grips it too hard.

he’s lost too much. so have you. it’s not over yet.

you notice karen visiting less than she did at first. you wonder if it’s just inconvenient for her to come or if it’s guilt, but then you remember she’s not ever been too good at feeling guilty about anything. it still sucks to admit, but you can kind of get it now.

when she does come she updates you on daniel and all her friends in away. she tells you that arthur and stanley finally got married, even after years of saying it didn’t really matter to them if it was official or not. you think about finn. you wonder if maybe, in another life, one where you had gone to mexico and called his number on that letter—

you hope he’s doing well.

you start avoiding reflective surfaces altogether. not that there’s many spare mirrors sitting around in prison, but even the water in the mop buckets makes you turn your head. you wonder how your beard looks, sometimes. you wonder how you look with the glass eye they fitted you with. you wonder how much you look like your father, or don’t. you wonder if he’d even recognize you now.

years and years go by and the only way you know this for certain is that daniel’s a lot taller, karen’s got wrinkles, and your grandparents aren’t able to visit you anymore. you’re sure you’ve aged like shit, but you can’t know for sure. your beard’s gotten fuller than your father’s ever was, and you know you probably look older at thirty than he did when he died at forty-five.

you don’t feel any relief when they remind you that you’re about to be released. fifteen years ago this day was all that kept you going, and now that it’s here, you feel sick. you don’t know what it’s like out there anymore. how much will have changed? how will the world look at you? how will you ever adapt after everything?

you’re still seventeen. you’re a thirty-two year old child. you’re still staring at the mexico border from the wheel of the car wondering if you’re making the right choice. you still wonder if you did.

they give you the few belongings you had in a duffle bag. you slip on the eyepatch right away, you aren’t ready to see the glass eye yet. you look for one thing in particular; an old sketchbook, a birthday gift from your father. ‘sean diaz, do not open.’, it read on the front.

the whole thing was read out loud in court for the trial, the entirety of your journey with daniel, your therapy. it’s not here. of course they kept it. add that to the list of things you’re never getting back.

you feel so incredibly small stepping out into the sun when they let you free, like an ant under a magnifying glass being lit aflame.

daniel’s there, of course, tall and bearded and a twenty-five year old man. that’s never going to stop hurting. karen’s next to him, looking so much older than you remember her looking the last time she came. you don’t remember when that was. she’s wearing a familiar rainbow windbreaker vest. joan must have passed away at some point. you wonder when that was.

you’re so overwhelmed that you don’t even notice a third person at first, you weren’t expecting anyone else, but she’s the only one who looks the same as you remember.

when she runs into your arms and crushes you in a hug you feel like a child again for the first time in nearly twenty years. you’ll never regret calling her, even when it was a stupid idea. best freaking fighters, forever.

adjusting is as hard as you imagined it would be, but not exactly in the way you imagined it would be. nobody gives you weird looks in public, but you can’t remember how to pump gas, because now the pumps look like alien software, and you cry in the car when daniel tells you that he’ll just do it instead.

you do look older than your father, but more than that, you look like a stranger to yourself. the only thing you recognize is your right eye, but everything else belongs to somebody else, a version of you you’ve never met.

it feels like greeting a family member you haven’t seen since you were little, and they look so different from what you remember in your head that you wonder if you ever met them at all.

somehow, that’s better than seeing yourself again. you remember the first time you looked in the mirror after losing your eye, how you had looked then with the cuts all over your face and your hair buzzed to the scalp.

it’s the same thing all over again, except now you have a beard, and instead of an empty socket you now have a solid white marble sitting in place of it. you look eerily like brody. something about that feels good, you’d love to be like brody.

you decide to keep the beard.

you feel guilty. even sitting in daniel’s apartment surrounded by your friends and family, a free man at last, you don’t feel happy. looking at him, you feel good. you’re proud, you’re incredibly proud, and he’s lived a good life, but now that you’ve paid your dues you have nothing of you left. it feels like you were a resource that’s all dried up and spent out. you’re in the sequel, and you still feel like you’re stuck in the cave.

after sixteen years of waiting you finally visit your father’s grave. you’re grateful that daniel’s taken good care of it, there’s already a bouquet of fresh flowers laid at his headstone when you go to place yours. you run your fingers along the words engraved into the hunk of marble and feel your wrist freeze when you get to ~2016.

1452 lewis avenue. tacky halloween decorations. lyla the love witch. daniel playing zombie in the front yard.

the front yard.

daniel lies with you in his arms on top of your father’s grave while you sob until you throw up in the grass and you’re so ashamed of yourself that you ride in the back seat when you leave. you don’t know what will ever make this better.

you want to get your life together, if there’s any point. you tell yourself there will be, you just have to find it. you pass your driver’s test and finally get your license, and daniel surprises you with a gift that rips your heart out in a way you didn’t think was possible anymore. the car that dad was fixing up for your graduation. the one you never got the chance to drive.

he’s saying something about how he’s made sure everything’s running and he’s had all the old parts replaced but you feel like you’re underwater and he sounds so far away.

you open the door and slide into the driver’s seat. there’s a faded old sticky-note on the dash with scribbled ink on it. ‘hope you have fun on all your hot dates, seanie-boy! don’t drink and drive. always call me if you need me. love, papito.’

i love you too, dad.

daniel helps you look for jobs, but every time you get an interview, you cancel. it doesn’t feel right. you don’t know why but you don’t feel ready, like there’s something you need to do first and you don’t know what it is.

daniel’s patient as ever, and you know he doesn’t mind, but sleeping on his couch feels a little worse every day you wake up on it. you almost feel like you owe karen an apology, you keep glancing at the door.

what do you need, then? what is going to fill this hole in your chest? think back, and think hard. when did you last feel most alive? was it living at home, going to school and working retail, worrying about college and being an adult? you know it wasn’t.

it was eight months on the open road. it was when you were traveling between state lines, meeting new people every day, living like wolves up in the woods. as horrible as it was, as much hell as you went through, you remember how much you loved the good parts, and how you’d pretend it was just a road trip when you could to make it bearable. you want to do it again, and do it right this time.

you bring it up to daniel. you ask him if he’d like to come, to be the wolf brothers together again—but he’s not like you anymore. he’s got a job, a home, a community—he’s got a place in this world. he can’t do it and that hurts. it’s why you threw away fifteen years of your life, though. you don’t know what else you expected.

he proposes an idea that makes your chest ache just to think about, but it sounds good. it sounds like it might be what you need, and that’s all you want, is to know what you need.

you pack up a small suitcase of everything you want to take with you; nothing heavy. you remember words from an old friend, a long time ago.

that’s how shit starts, you know? when you start havin’ things of your own… things you ought to defend. property, land, family. what do you think you’re missin’ out on now?

you don’t know.

you want to find out.

you follow daniel all the way back up to washington. even from the car, it’s all flooding back. you walked this exact road on foot for miles and miles in the opposite direction. you know now that you may as well have turned back then, but you know all things considered, it was worth the journey. the best and worst time of your whole life.

you park on the edge of the road, right where you first walked into the woods so many years ago. daniel didn’t even know his father was dead yet back then; just a couple of kids playing with sticks and skipping stones on the water, and you swallowing your grief down like shards of glass.

nostalgia eats you alive like a coyote tearing right into your throat. so much is the same; the trail, the markers on the trees, daniel excitedly walking ahead of you, and you’re trailing behind, feeling like the only thing that’s changed.

it’s funny. you were so worried about the world out there being different when you got out, but it’s just you. who is sean diaz anymore? you wish you could ask the boy who carried his brother into these woods in full confidence that he’d be able to outrun his fate sixteen years ago. in all his terror, he probably knows the answer better than you do. oh, how you envy him.

you replicate your first night in these woods down to every last detail by building a fire under the same rock den you did back then. daniel’s so much older, so much bigger than he was then, but he’s still daniel.

it hits you fully, finally. there’s no getting back what you’ve lost. not your own childhood, and not daniel’s either. you’re both grown up and there is no way to redeem yourself that will gift you the ability to go back in time.

it’s always going to be this; stories that you can try your best to imagine like you were there, but everybody will always know where you really were. they won’t say it, like it’s a dirty word, but it’s a part of you now. there’s no sean diaz without those ugly fifteen years stamped onto your life like a passport.

daniel’s in the middle of telling you about his first kiss with a boy when you remember yours. it was with chris, no less. they’re engaged now. you try not to be heartbroken that you missed that, too. at least they held off the wedding.

you think about finn again. you think about arthur and stanley. you think about the fact that you’re thirty-two and haven’t had a kiss since, and the fact that you could have fallen in love, but that was taken from you, too.

you feel so selfish and ridiculous for bursting into tears. you feel like such a fucking child when daniel has to rock you in his arms to calm you back down and keeps apologizing for bringing it up.

sorry, I forgot. you told me back then, remember? I should’ve known better.

none of it’s fair. you deserve to have the capacity to be happy and be happy for daniel. you feel too numb for your own comfort. this isn’t who you are.

you’re surprised when you wake up the next morning and feel… clarity? the sense that something better is coming, maybe. oh, right. there’s a name for that.

hope.

it feels right when you’re walking out of the woods and back to your car with daniel, like you’re getting ready to meet yourself somewhere, as soon as you find him.

this is a choice, a see you later. we’ll talk as soon as i get somewhere with wifi. promise, i’ll call. i love you. get home safe.

you get into the car that your dad wanted you to grow up in, and after much too long, you’re finally about to. you drive away first, watching daniel in the rearview mirror as he waves excitedly. he’s almost out of view when you see him cup his hands around his mouth, tilting his head back. you can’t hear him, but you know well enough.

you howl as loud as you can, even though all the windows are rolled up and daniel’s over the hill already. maybe a lot has changed, and you have too, but there’s one thing that never will. the tale of the two wolf brothers.

it’s time for you to write your own story, big brother.

#lis2 #life is strange 2 #sean diaz #daniel diaz #my writing #long post /#I DEBATED POSTING THIS ONE HERE... BECAUSE ITS REALLLY LONG LMAO #but w/e anyways heres a redemption poem Thing i wrote to cope #also a lot of this is headcanon so take it w/ a grain of salt we simply dont know!

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cartoonrants · 6 years ago

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my theory on why older audiences don't like modern-day cartoons

if i were to walk up to any random kid at my high school and ask them about the cartoons they grew up with they would speak really highly of them on the other side of the coin when i ask them about newer cartoons they tend to say they’re bad kid shows that have been dulled down or aren’t as edgy as they used to be

with the end of adventure time this has become more and more obvious, people suddenly being reminded that adventure time was a thing that they liked and feeling sad about it ending even though they haven’t watched the show in years and probably wouldn’t have ever watched it again obviously there isn’t a problem with feeling sad that a show you enjoyed as a kid but don’t watch anymore is ending my problem is with the way these people started acting toward modern day shows

obviously, if you stopped watching adventure time around season 4 (like most high schoolers did) and randomly picked up again at the season finale you’re gonna have some questions

why are Marcy and PB kissing instead of Finn and PB???

who the hell is betty???

why is ice king a human???

who are these gum people??

what the hell happened to Finn's arm???

and so many more reasonable questions

what i didn’t appreciate is the way these people started a new wave of hating modern cartoons in place of learning anything about them

more than ever I’ve seen people talking about the fall of children’s entertainment saying it’s not as good, and it’s only aimed at children and adults can’t enjoy it like they used to be able to. they claim that with the end of adventure time so dies the children’s entertainment industry

now i love cartoons from the 90s and early 2000s just as much as the next person if not more but these cartoons are no better than modern-day shows

obviously there are going to be shows that aren’t as good at entertaining a more grown-up audience shows like teen titans go, Clarence, uncle grandpa, and the majority of modern nick toons (excluding the loud house) aren’t very popular with older audiences for a reason but shows like steven universe, star vs. the forces of evil, Voltron, she ra, the amazing world of gumball and so many more cartoons are excellent examples of modern-day cartoons that can appeal to older audiences but they still get hate from people claiming cartoons aren't as good as they used to be

but what is it about these shows that makes them seem bad to the newly grown generation???

this is where i belive nostalgia kicks shows like regular show, adventure time, and avatar the last Airbender are some of the most talked about cartoons when discussing good old cartoons that gen z enjoyed and i doubt that anyone reading this is gonna argue that these aren't BOMB shows i mean ive seen them all, all the way through more than a few times but the fact that these shows are good isn't what made older generations that don't like the shows now like them

the reason these people liked them was THEY WERE KIDS they enjoy these shows and think highly of these shows because they watched them when they were young if they were to watch modern day cartoons at a younger age they would probably have the same opinion so why do people feel the need to hate on a show that they probably would've enjoyed had they been born a little later?

that takes me to my next point the reason these people think modern day cartoons suck is cause *drumroll* they've grown out of cartoons, sometimes when you surround yourself with more grownup content that's filled with violence, gore, and sex its harder to come back to the innocence that surrounds the child entertainment industry even if the show has deeper darker themes you have trouble enjoying something that lacks shock and is just a simply good show

when people are exposed to mature content they become numb to the shock value and start to expect it instead of being surprised by it so if you have been watching shows where any and all conflict is solved by gory bloody violence you're gonna have trouble watching star narwal blast her enemies away or if you've been watching shows where all of the humor is rated R you're not gonna losing breath over lemongrab asking PB to unmake him

so, in conclusion, the idea that the modern day cartoons lack some secret edgy ingredient or some dark theme that made them entertaining to older generations isn't true they are still entertaining, dark, and interesting what's changed is the people and what they find entertaining so maybe if you find yourself thinking that cartoons aren't as good as they used to be watch a new one you might find yourself pleasantly surprised

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freelancearsonist · 5 years ago

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"Born for This" by The Score and Poe Dameron 😍

(UPDATED) 400 Follower Celebration

Thank you for this request! I’d never heard this song before but I loved it. I’m not sure why this is the vibe I got from it but I regret nothing :)

You can’t help staring as he makes his way around the small clearing, exchanging greetings with anyone and everyone he crosses paths with.

“Oh, (Y/N),” Jess laughs softly from beside you. “You’re so smitten it’s making me sick.”

You don’t even try to deny it anymore. You did at first, but Jess can read you like a book.

She’s right. You’re so in love with Poe Dameron that it hurts, and he looks right through you like you’re not even there.

Okay, maybe not through you. He sees you, all right. The two of you are friends—he can’t exactly ignore you. But knowing that he doesn’t return your feelings just makes being near him that much worse.

It weighs on you like a ton of bricks, and you’ve gotten used to carrying that load. You hope that someday the weight will go away, but you’re smart enough to know that it won’t be any time soon. Not when a brick gets added to the pile every time you see Poe Dameron.

You’re too far inside your own head to realize that Jess has walked away and Poe is getting dangerously close. You don’t snap out of your thoughts until he’s right in front of you, extending his hand to help you stand up.

You know that touching him will hurt too much, so you push yourself to your feet on your own. You miss the flash of hurt in his gorgeous eyes because you’re avoiding looking at his face.

He doesn’t ask if you’re okay, because he can tell you’re not. How could you be? The Resistance had taken substantial losses. No one was okay.

Instead, he asks if you want to go for a walk.

You don’t want to be anywhere near him. Why, out of everyone that had survived Crait, did he want to take a walk with you? Did he derive some sort of sick satisfaction from toying with you?

You can’t bring yourself to deny his request, though. You’re putty in his hands–you have been for longer than you care to admit. You just nod, head hanging low as you will back your tears. You won’t let yourself cry over Poe Dameron. Not right in front of him. You won’t.

“I haven’t seen much of you lately,” he says quietly, hands tucked into his pockets as he leads the way through the unfamiliar jungle. “I’ve missed you.”

You whimper deep in your throat, quiet enough that he doesn’t hear it over the sound of his heavy boots against the leaves and roots and twigs. He’s breaking your heart, and he has no clue that he’s doing it.

“We’ve gotta rebuild the Resistance now,” he sighs, perfectly content to fill the silence with the sound of his own voice. “Leia… she’s getting weaker. I feel like a lot more of this is on us now, even though she says she’s fine.”

You don’t know what you’ve done to deserve his friendship, but you seriously doubt if you can go much longer without sobbing.

“If I’m being honest, there’s no one I’d rather fight alongside. This war… it sucks, and it’s far from over, but together, we’ll get through it.”

He sits down on a fallen tree trunk, leaving plenty of space for you to join him. You don’t–you can’t. You opt to lean against a nearby tree, and you finally look at him.

You wish you hadn’t. His hair is mussed up slightly, curls untamed and denser than normal. His tan skin is covered with a slight sheen of sweat due to the humidity of whatever planet you’re on, mouth open just the slightest bit. His chest rises and falls steadily, brown eyes staring at you like you’re his moon. You suppose you must be, because you gravitate around him.

“The thing I love the most about the Resistance is the people,” he continues, and you feel tears welling in your eyes. “I love that a bunch of us got together, from all over the galaxy, and we all fight with the same symbol on our arms.”

He smiles fondly as his fingers trace over the patch on his upper arm. You like this jacket–the one that replaced the one he gave to his friend Finn. You think it might’ve belonged to his father, once upon a time.

He stands up and takes a step closer, and you automatically bow your head.

“I know it looks really bad right now, and I’m gonna be honest, I lost my hope for a second there, when we were in that cave and nobody showed,” he tells you quietly, like it’s a secret. It’s not. You watched the hope leave his eyes. “But there’s no one I’d rather build a rebellion with. We were born for this.”

He’s standing too close now, and when his hand traces up your cheek and tucks your hair behind your ear your wall comes crumbling down. You flinch away from his touch, tears streaming down your face.

He recoils in an instant, concern flashing through his eyes. He’s scared he’s somehow hurt you even though he knows he hasn’t–physically, at least. He doesn’t know that he’s settled a dull ache deep within your chest.

“(Y/N), I-”

“I can’t do this,” you whimper, trying desperately not to let your voice break. “Why are you playing with me?”

“What?” His mouth hangs open slightly, and he has no clue how to respond because he has no clue what you’re talking about.

“I can’t… I can’t…” But you can’t even put to words what, exactly, you can’t. It just hurts. It hurts to be around him when you know there’s no chance that he could ever love someone like you.

He pulls you into his arms, letting you bury your face in his chest. He smooths a hand through your hair as you sob against him, fists clutched tightly in his shirt.

When you’ve calmed down to the point that your body isn’t shaking anymore, he cups your face in his hands so you’re forced to look at him, and you try desperately to escape but he won’t let you. Not until he’s told you the truth.

“I love you.”

“No you don’t,” you dispute before you can stop yourself.

His eyebrows furrow and his jaw sets in the most confused look he’s ever given anyone. “What the hell do you mean?”

“You can’t love me. I’m not… I’m not that lucky,” you whisper, and for a moment you almost think you see affection in his eyes. Almost.

“Wait, so you’ve seriously tricked yourself into believing that I could never fall for you?” He asks, completely flabbergasted. “Why would you do that?”

You just shrug. “You’ve only ever treated me like a friend.”

“Because we’ve only ever been friends.”

Oh. Oh. That makes sense. Holy shit, how did you miss that? How could you be so irrational?

“For better or for worse, I fell in love with you. Hard,” he smiles slightly, bottom lip pulled between his teeth as he stares adoringly at you. “And I’m kind of hoping you feel the same way, because you’re my best friend and I really don’t want to lose you. Not after everything else I’ve lost today.”

“I do,” you say through tears, except this time they’re good tears. Happy tears. “I love you.”

He smiles like he’s just won the galactic lottery. “Can I kiss you?”

You pull his face to yours without giving yourself time to answer.

Song Fic Masterlist

#poe dameron #poe dameron fluff #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron x you #poe dameron imagine #clarke's 100 follower celebration

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jazziehart · 4 years ago

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Character Dissection [Rachel Berry]: Episode by Episode - Season 2B

Hello and welcome back to the second half of my Season 2 character dissection of Rachel Berry. Once again I want to leave a warning that my review of Rachel this season isn’t positive so if you are a huge fan, I think it’s best of you click off of this. If not, here are my thought on Rachel for the second half of Season 2 from The Sue Sylvester Shuffle to New York

Let’s start off with the superbowl episode of Glee the Sue Sylvester Shuffle. This episode is one of the 2, 90 minute episodes in Season 2. In this episode the Glee Club and the football team are made to work together after their personal conflicts are hindering the team. Rachel is very unhappy with the newest additions as are most of the club but she’s especially upset about Karofsky. Will soon asks her to perform a new duet she’s been working on with Puck, something that confuses and upsets Finn at first. The performance doesn’t go over well and ends with the clubs fighting. Sue soon decides to make the Unholy Trinity choose between Cheerios and Glee which proves to be a conflict for them but Rachel insists that she knows Quinn will choose Cheerios which pissed me off (avid Quinn fan here but I think you knew that). The Unholy Trinity do end up choosing Cheerios for awhile due to Quinn being scared to losing her status, Brittany worrying about the baby cannons, and Santana just liking being a cheerio more than being in Glee. The football team and Glee Club however seem to be really together, that is until the team gets slushied and quits on Coach Beiste. Rachel and Mercedes meet up with Kurt and Blaine who reveal that they only need 9 players and they come up with a plan, to have the Glee girls fill the team but not play the game, something that is accepted. Rachel is enthusiatic about playing and follows what she said she would do unlike some of the other girls who end up playing. Once Quinn, Brittany, and Santana rejoin the Glee Club, Rachel and the other glee girls help cheer on the game and that’s where Rachel’s storyline ends in that episode.

Up next is Silly Love Songs. Rachel is excited when Finn announces his kissing booth, declaring she will show up with a $50 to kiss him until he realizes that he still loves her, once again proving she isn’t able to give him the time to move past their incident or the space he needs to actually be with someone else who might be better for him. She is shown saying this at a sleepover where she’s with Mercedes and Kurt. I actually did like their friendship moments and the fact that Mercedes told them both not to emphasize on relationships and focus on themselves. Rachel does end up going to Finn’s kissing booth but only with a dollar. She is mad when he kisses her on the cheek instead of the lips which she was expecting. He soon gives her a delayed Christmas present, a gold star necklace. He tells her that he still needs space to get over what happened but it doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care about her. Rachel upset accepts his answer and walks away. She later finds out that Finn and Quinn have kissed when she’s taking care of Finn after he gets mono. When Rachel realizes he cares about Quinn and not her she is unhappy but decides that Mercedes was right that she needed to be single for awhile. Some minor storylines she’s involved in are when Santana is insulting the club like she usually does and Rachel strikes back at her leading Santana to leave visibly upset. She also is seen confused by Puck singing ‘Fat Bottomed Girls’ to Lauren but soon gets into it. Finally, she’s seen at Breadstix where Kurt says to her and Mercedes that this is the year for the singles.

Moving onto Comeback. After losing Finn, Rachel decides she wants to make a comeback for her career and be trendy within the school so she enlists Brittany to try to popularize her looks. Funny enough this does work and people are copying Brittany but Brittany wore the leg warmers on her arms leading the other girls to do the same and once she finally wears the same look as Rachel, people can only credit Brittany with their ideas which makes Rachel hurt and upset. Brittany explains to Rachel that no one in school sees her as a trendsetter which Rachel is obviously hurt about but soon Rachel finds what she is a trendsetter in and that’s Glee Club. She gets a new idea that would continue throughout the season of wanting to do original songs. No one supports the idea at first but Finn tells her that he does in private. Rachel is obviously upset that he didn’t speak up but he tells her the only way to prove she’s right is to write a great song. He also says he liked the Rachel he saw in Glee Club and said that she’s making a comeback which Rachel is happy about.

Up next is Blame It on the Alcohol one of the more entertaining episodes. We start off with Rachel’s hilariously bad original song ‘My Headband’ which Finn tries to tell her gently that it’s bad. Rachel takes this opportunity to take Puck up on his offer for a party while her dads are out of town hoping it would help with her songwriting. She hosts a party which almost ends before it begins but with Puck breaking into the liquor cabinet, everyone drinks and has a good time. While drunk Rachel starts to hit on Finn leading Finn to walk her through the types of drunks saying Rachel was a needy drunk. She gets upset by this and decides to start a game of ‘Spin the Bottle’ which leads to her and Blaine kissing which progresses into more for Rachel. After the party Rachel drunkenly asks him out on a date which Blaine accepts. The two go on a date but have yet to kiss which Kurt believes is proof that Blaine is gay. Rachel tells Kurt that she’ll kiss Blaine again sober and they’ll see who’s right. Rachel throughout the episode continues to drink as do most of the other members of the club but it leads to probably one of the most iconic moments during the pep assembly where Brittany pukes on Rachel. Rachel swears off drinking after this happens stating it did nothing for her song writing. She then meets Kurt and Blaine at the Lima Bean where she kisses an unexpectant Blaine who declares that he’s definitely gay. Rachel actually takes this well thinking it could be a great song.

Up next is Sexy. Rachel has joined the celibacy club for some unknown reason and she and Quinn are the only two members. Rachel is constantly asking Quinn about her relationship with Finn which Quinn doesn’t want to answer about since she agreed not to tell Rachel about their relationship since Finn didn’t want her to get hurt. Throughout the episode Rachel isn’t into Holly’s Sexy lessons even though she does join in on the number towards the end after Holly brings her and Quinn into the number. Puck soon joins the celibacy club much to Rachel and Quinn’s surprise and joins them in on the celibacy club’s number of ‘Afternoon Delight’. Other than that Rachel doesn’t have much of a storyline in the episode.

Moving onto one of Rachel’s most important episodes Original Song. This episode starts off with Rachel once again trying her hand at an original song delivering the slightly better ‘Only Child’. Finn tells her that her writing isn’t there and the song should be more emotional. Later on when news breaks that ‘Sing’ was taken away from the New Directions, Rachel once again tries to suggest original songs. This time she gets support from an unlikely source of Quinn who is trying to keep Rachel closer to keep her away from Finn. Once Quinn is onboard the entire club seems to fight over who’s going to get to write a song and the club now has decided to do original songs. Rachel soon notices how Finn and Quinn are with each other in the hall and decides to confront Quinn about it. Rachel finally asks her if she and Finn are together which Quinn tells her it’s true. Rachel is clearly hurt by it and adds that Finn had once chosen Rachel over her. Also hurt Quinn snips back asking how long did it last for. Rachel, playing the victim claims Quinn is being ‘so mean’. Girl you started it bringing up that he chose you over her which you know is a sore spot. Rachel claims she’s not going to give up on Finn that it isn’t over to which Quinn exclaims that it is and that Rachel keeps making the same mistakes looking to be with Finn and that if she keeps it up she’ll never Get It Right. This conversation inspires Rachel to write her original song of the same title. While at Regionals Rachel tells Finn that she means every word, once again trying to get Finn away from his girlfriend. The two really bond at Regionals and are thrilled when the New Directions win. The New Directions soon award Rachel the MVP award which everyone voted for her for, even Quinn. Rachel is touched by the award and the New Directions all hug her afterwards.

Up next is A Night of Neglect, probably one of my least favorite episodes of Season 2. Mostly because there isn’t too much of a plot involving the New Directions. Rachel’s biggest plot point is the fact that she wants the closing slot and like everyone else is pushing Mercedes aside. This eventually has Mercedes turn into a diva and make demands. Rachel eventually goes to talk to her and tries to encourage Mercedes that she is good enough and that she didn’t need to make the crazy demands to be respected. Eventually she convinces Mercedes to come back and allows her to have the closing number.

Moving on to one of my all-time favorite episodes Born This Way. This episode actually focuses a lot on Rachel and her insecurity with her nose and how she contemplates getting a nose job. I just want to point out that this was completely out of character for her and a stark contrast to how she was in Acafellas where she rejected the idea of a nose job and told the club that their quirks were what made them special. I know she wanted to look more like Quinn which is unsurpisingly driving her nose job but it was a little strange that she considered it. Her nose was injured and the doctor did suggest it but she always seemed to want to keep her nose the same up until that point. Anyway, she asks Quinn to accompany her to the consultation which Quinn does (as it’s revealed in the episode that Quinn herself had a nose job so she’s not against helping Rachel do the same, sorry Faberry shippers this has nothing to do with Quinn being in love with Rachel). Rachel is admant about wanting to get the nose job not even Finn can convince her not to. But you know who arranges something that actually helps her decide against it? Puck. He enlists the help of Kurt who have a flashmob saying that Rachel is like Barbra Streisand and that she shouldn’t get a nose job which leaves Rachel convinced not to do it. She does have the septoplasty but avoids getting a nose job and wears a shirt embracing her nose.

Up next is Rumours which is one of Rachel’s worst episodes in my opinion. She starts off innocent enough asking Sam to the prom which he declines saying he doesn’t think he’s going to prom. Rachel keeps insisting that they go to prom which leads Sam to tell Rachel he’s just not into her like that. Rachel is shocked but soon reads an article in the Muckraker that she shows to Finn saying that Quinn was at a motel with Sam. While it looks bad on the outside, Quinn is actually helping Sam’s family out by babysitting his siblings. Quinn won’t say what’s happening leading Finn to accuse her of cheating, much to Rachel’s delight. Finn soon asks Rachel to stake out with him in an attempt to catch Quinn and Sam in the act. Their first stake out only sees Sam hugging Kurt goodbye which they mistakenly interpret as Sam having a relationship with Kurt as well. While I get Finn thinking this, Rachel should’ve known better. Quinn confronts Finn about staking out with Rachel and they perform a duet clearly upset with each other. Rachel comments that she thinks Quinn’s duet with Sam was better and Quinn knows exactly what Rachel’s doing and calls her out on it and insists that Finn and Rachel no longer sing together declaring that she doesn’t trust Rachel. Rachel and Finn once again stake out and see Sam and Quinn together. Rachel soon decides to sing a song mostly directing her attention to Finn to piss off Quinn who is upset by it saying what Rachel did was inappropriate and then Rachel goes off saying awful things about how Quinn’s a hypocrite which leads poor Sam to reveal that Quinn wasn’t lying but that his family lost their home and were living in a motel. Rachel and Finn go to make amends with Sam and it all works out. This episode is a good one but Rachel’s actions especially piss me off. This is probably her worst episode in my opinion.

Now moving onto Prom Queen. Rachel sees how upset Mercedes is about Prom and actually does a good thing and talks to her coming up with a plan of Prom on a budget for the two of them to go with Sam. Sam accepts their offer and the 3 of them were going to prom together. All is fine and well until Jesse comes back. Rachel is surpised to see him and Jesse admits he came back for her then asks her to prom. Rachel accepts and Finn soon finds out and is annoyed. Rachel tries to help him with picking a corsage for Quinn, something many Faberry shippers try to say is how they know Rachel loved her because she knew what matched her eyes. Honestly she only made the suggestion to Finn to get something that was green, Finn was the one who picked it out. Anyway Rachel is clearly in love with Jesse as they go on their date with Sam and Mercedes but still seems constantly torn between him and Finn throughout the prom. Jesse and Finn get into a fight over Rachel something both girls try to put a stop to. I feel awful for Quinn since Prom was such a big deal to her and to have it be ruined by the one person who you are insecure about sucks. When Quinn loses Prom Queen Rachel tries to go talk to her. Quinn blames Rachel because everyone knows Finn would rather be with her. She slaps Rachel clearly getting out her frustration for the night but soon apologizes. Rachel comforts Quinn who’s scared because she’s pretty much lost nearly everything she cares about. I know Faberry shippers look at this as a romantic moment between them and I’ve addressed this before, but Rachel only went after her because she knew Quinn was angry with her. She comforted Quinn because she wanted to be her friend. There is nothing romantic there. Sorry for my ranting about them. Anyway the two agree to support Kurt and go back to the prom. Rachel dances with Mercedes and Sam and Quinn dances the night away trying to forget what happened.

Moving onto Funeral. This episode Rachel is competing to be the star of the New Directions and tries to encourage Finn that he’s good enough. She kills her audition but is fighting with the others who want the lead, Santana, Kurt, and Mercedes which leads to Will nixxing the competition. Her only other storyline is with Jesse and her unresolved feelings for him. Jesse promises Rachel that she’ll win and Rachel is so thrilled with that they hug. Rachel is upset when the competition is taken away but agrees to help the club write a song for Nationals something she’s been looking forward to.

Finally, we close with the season finale of New York. Rachel is obviously enthuiastic about New York but makes an error that’s unlike her, saying she got tickets to Cats which had been closed for 10 years. It took Quinn of all people to tell her that. Rachel was Broadway obsessed why would she even think there was a chance that those tickets were real? Anyway she’s incredibly conflicted throughout the entire episode about following her career or getting with Finn. She originally chooses her career but that’s overshadowed when she and Finn kiss after their duet, something that ends up costing them Nationals. Santana is pissed and tries to attack Rachel after they lose. Finn and Rachel soon have a conversation about their relationship and Rachel gets back with him realizing she has another year to go after her New York dreams.

Let’s go to the overview. Rachel is once again selfish with many decisions she makes especially when it comes to Finn. She has somewhat of an obsession of getting him back and is willing to do whatever it takes, something that is constantly hurting Quinn who is his girlfriend for the majority of this half of the season. She is however a really good friend to Kurt and Mercedes which is something that wasn’t truly defined in Season 1 due to her not getting along with everyone. Overall this version of Rachel is still my least favorite even though Season 3 will be coming in a very close second. Stay tuned for the Season 3 post coming your way. Until then, be respectful and kind.

#rachel berry #glee #glee season 2 #finchel #st. berry #faberry #puckleberry

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ganderinggoosie · 5 years ago

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Would you break down Kylo Ren, please?

Boy can I anon! :) Apologies as well for the late reply, i wanted to take my time for this one.

essentially the TL/DR version is: this character has been neglected and abused his entire life, believing he didn't belong anywhere with anyone. only after realizing his parents and Rey actually care about him does he gain the courage to “do the right thing.” He’s then written unceremoniously out of existence after saving and kissing Rey, only being happy for 10 seconds in hid entire life. Aint that dandy! :)

Idk how short of an explanation you want, but i also decided to list all of his major character arcs within his lifetime, simply because i care about this character A LOT. I haven’t written anything like an essay in a while, so i really couldn’t help myself haha. This list is also chronological, but ill keep it under a read-more for easy scrolling.

PRE-TFA

Literally been toyed with and corrupted SINCE BEFORE BEING BORN

A happy toddler who loved his parents and "uncles"

His parents loved him very much but didn’t treat him as a priority. Leia tended to focus on her political career and Han couldn’t shake his old nomadic ways. As a result, Ben ended up very isolated.

As he grew stronger and keener to the isolation, his parents feared him and his emotions. Leia sent him away to Luke’s academy, despite Han not wanting Ben to go.

Made friends in the academy, but still a loner. All the while the voices in his head (Snoke/palpatine) are growing louder and louder

Luke forcibly saw into his mind, intent on ending ben’s life until changing his mind. Naturally this upset Ben, seeing as he figured what was left of his family that cared about him wanted him dead. He then collapsed the building, trapping Luke inside.

While deciding to run away, a storm (inferably caused by Snoke/Palpatine) struck fire to the Jedi Temple, killing the students inside. Ben attempted to save a few, but failed.

Ran into the arms of the First Order and the Knights of Ren, since snoke gaslit him into believing it was the only place he could be.

Trained under The KOR and Snoke as a dark side force warrior. Mainly used asa spiritual tool to snuff out Jedi rather than a political tool for the FO.

Tasked with finding Luke Skywalker, sets the beginning of TFA in motion.

TFA

Demonstrates his capability in dark side tendencies by torturing Poe for information

Chooses not to acknowledge Finn’s deflection

immediately gets distracted from his mission of finding bb8 once learning there is a girl involved with this situation.

remains primarily on the defense while subduing rey, carries her away manually to his ship for interrogation. its notable to mention that Han was completely unworried for rey as she was being taken; he knew rey was strong enough to resist and he knew his son’s shortcomings.

willingly unmasks to rey while interrogating her; this is to show the audience that not only is he making himself more vulnerable and relatable to rey, but also to show that he’s completely opposite to what rey was expecting.

Their connection is formed as they push into each other’s minds

snoke tells him to kill his father in order to complete the training. ben loves his father dearly but genuinely believes he’s too far gone to do anything contradictory to snoke’s orders.

senses it when han arrives at Starkiller, and ignores him. referential material implied that kylo wanted to give han the chance to escape, but when Han sought him out then he reacted.

kills han, the deed “splitting him to the bone”

survived, but gravely injured by Chewbacca’s bowcaster blast (shown previously blowing up 6 troopers at once). Sees Finn and Rey, becoming enraged, and follows them.

intercepts rey and finn in the forrest. angrily taunts them while beating his wounds. sends rey back into a tree in self-defense. demands to take the legacy saber, fighting with finn in the process. its notable that his fighting style while on the offensive is extremely akin to a berserker method; precise and accurate but brutal and excessive. ends up slashing finn and rendering him unconscious.

is in awe of rey’s ability to call the saber to her, fights her less-aggressively in order to corner her and offer her guidance. naturally she refuses, and taps into the force to overpower him and leave him bleeding on Starkiller as her and Finn rejoin the resistance.

TLJ

approaches snoke in his throneroom, visibly injured and emotional as a result of his fight with rey and the death of his father. snoke mocks his “weak” emotional state and calls him a “child in a mask.”

is hurt by snoke’s remark, an destroys his mask in a rage.

leads an arial attack on the Resistance ships, demonstrating his skills as a pilot. When he has an opportunity to blow up his mother’s ship, he doesn’t; he loves her far too much and cant physically bring himself to repeat the horror of killing Han. Unfortunately, one of the TIE pilots do instead. (later he is relieved to still feel his mother through the force.)

while in a medbay getting treatment for his scar, the force connects him with rey for the first time. both are surprised by this turn of events, and Kylo is more curious as to the logistics of the connection rather than being angry at the sudden appearance of his enemy.

connects with rey again as she is in the rain, still fascinated by how exactly the bond works. rey is still enraged by his presence as he casually mentions that Luke isnt the saintly figure she sees him as. Agrees with her as she angrily calls him a monster; instead of a taunt its actually a display of self-loathing. he then wipes his face after their connection ends, demonstrating that the bond they share permeates a physical space (as well as being a metaphor of the palpable tension between him and rey).

connects with rey again, this time with him in a state of partial undress. rey asks him if he could put a shirt on and he doesn't, despite the fact his shirt is on the desk a few feet away. the narrative purpose of this introduction is to show that rey is physically attracted to him and he knows it.

tells rey his story of Luke attempting to kill him, then tells her his nihilistic outlook of “letting the past die.” they disconnect, but rey ends up following his advice and explores the darker part of the island (a metaphor for HER darker side).

Later connects with rey again as she tearfully tells how alone she felt while in the cave attempting to find herself. Him, visibly touched by her story and the fact she trusts him enough to confess something so personal, tearfully tells her that she’s not alone. they then touch hands, doing so granting them visions of the supposed future. Luke angrily blasts apart the cabin, forcefully ending their connection.

Rey flies to him on the Supremacy, and he cuffs her to take her to snoke. (It’s important to mention that in the novel adaptation of the movie, it’s more of a playful and flirtatious banter between the two instead of a prisoner/hostage situation.) While on the elevator rey begs him to join her, as he counters and says that she’ll eventually join him instead.

While in snoke’s throne room, Kylo submissively kneels as snoke tortures rey for information. he occassionally looks up woefully at her, and eventually turns the saber on snoke after saying “he knows what he has to do.” He and rey team up to fight the Praetorian Guards and end up defeating them together.

Pleads with Rey to join him in leading the darkside as rey pleads with him to save the resistance fleet. Kylo tells her that he saw who her parents were and that she was nothing to them and had no place in that particular story. he then clumsily adds “but not to me” and begs her to join him again. the two then fight over the legacy saber, only to have it explode and knock them both back.

passed out from both the blast of the saber and Holdo blasting through the ship, kylo awakens to find rey gone. heartbroken and furious at her supposed betrayal of his trust, he violently declares himself the new Supreme Leader and orders an attack on Crait.

on Crait, he shows that not only is he deeply impulsive, but also an ultimately poor leader. he’s fine until noticing the millenium falcon, then finally loses it in a fury of rage and heartbreak. Luke skywalker understands the irrational state his nephew is in, and takes advantage of his irrationality to aid the resistance. his fight with luke was simply a distraction and taunt, resulting in a massive tactical failure.

kneels in defeat while clutching his father’s lucky dice, only to be connected with rey one more time. she distainfully “shuts the door” on him, and he recoils sadly as the dice disappear.

PRE-TROS

featured in supplimental material as a ruthless leader, hellbent on finding the resistance and eliminating threats to the First Order.

is shown to take plenty of self-assigned solo missions, implying that he doesnt truthfully care about the governmental aspect of being supreme leader.

TROS

Begins the film on Mustafar, fighting a band of cultists dedicated to Darth Vader, taking the wayfinder they were protecting. in earlier drafts of the movie (as well as probable deleted scenes) Kylo then sees a character known as the Oracle on Mustafar, who cryptically tells him about Palpatine, Rey’s heritage, as well as his affection for rey that he attempts to deny.

he flies to Exogol, where he discovers that it was actually palpatine whos been manipulating him his entire life. threatens to kill palpatine but humors him as palpatine offers promises of utter domination if kylo could kill rey. naturally he has no intention of doing so.

Later connects with rey as she is training. its unclear if hes the one making the training droid react negatively to her or if hes simply observing her and attempting to catch her off-guard.

unites with the knights to rebuild his mask (for some reason).

informs the First Order officials he knows one of them is a spy (for some reason).

connects with rey as she’s on pasaana, taunting her and stealing her necklace in order to track her location.

arrives to pasaana and witnesses rey trying to drag a ship down. holds back the ship in order to see if she’d tap into the dark side to bring it down, which she does.

follows rey to kijimi as she boards his ship and steals the dagger he has. tells her the “true history” of her parentage while also stating that he’d never lie to her. they fight (him on defensive) and she destroys his room. they meet again in person, him unmasking to show hes being sincere in proposing to her again; saying they’re a dyad and they belong together. she denies, again, and flees.

meets her again on the Death Star, remarking that neither of them could return to the light since the pair of them are too far ingrained into the dark. He destroys the wayfinder she found, believing they’ll only get to Exogol together. they fight, again, with him on the defensive, again.

towards the end of their fight its clear that rey is exhausted, so he backs away and lowers his weapon. however, at this exact instance, Leia chooses to call out to him via the force. (it is unclear if she does this to distract him or if she does this because she knows she’s ill and wants to see him before she passes.) While he is distracted, rey grabs his saber and fatally stabs him. he collapses, feeling his mother’s death and the resignation that the woman hes in love with ended him. However, rey immediately regrets hurting him and uses the force to heal him. she confesses that had he been Ben rather than Kylo, she would’ve taken his hand.

While gazing out to sea alone, Kylo hears the voice of his father. He turns, and it met with a vision of Han. Han tells him to “come home” and that the light within Ben was always there. Han caresses his cheek like he did in TFA. Ben, crying, starts to say something but is so overcome with emotion that all he can manage is “dad.” Han smiles and says “i know,” a callback to his line to Leia in ESB. With the forgiveness of his father and the newfound strength and motivation, ben throws his saber into the ocean, effectively cementing his persona Kylo Ren officially dead.

as rey is in danger on Exogol, Ben flies an abandoned TIE (inferably left in the Death Star wreckage) there and sprints, armed with only a blaster, and launches himself into danger to help rey.

their bond connects as she’s about to pledge to the sith and as the knights of ren are about to kill him. he wordlessly assures her that he’s there for her and that its ok to reveal that shes part of a dyad. she agrees, passing along her saber to him through their bond. Ben kills the Knights as rey kills the sith guardians.

the pair of them reunite, but only for palpatine to sap their life force, made more powerful due to them being a dyad. once significantly weakened, Palpatine launches Ben into a pit.

After defeating palpatine, rey dies. Ben manages to climb out of the pit and crawls over to rey, severely injured. he then embraces her lifeless body and cries for her, knowing then what he needs to do.

Ben heals rey with the force, bringing her back to life. Rey, elated to see him, cups his face as he cries and smiles feebly. she kisses him and caresses his face again, him smiling and chucking for the first time the entire series. At peace and healed by the redemptive power of being in love and having that person love him back in return.

he then immediately falls over dead and disappears into the force, thereby ruining all semblance of a skywalker legacy and redemption arc. FOR. SOME. REASON.

#kylo ren #ben solo #reylo #rey #finn #han solo #leia organa #knights of ren #luke skywalker #supreme leader snoke #sheev #meta #star wars #answered #anon #yeah this got way too long lol

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kyluxtrashpit · 5 years ago

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K so I said I might write a post about what I wanted from ep 9 and then I ended up doing it. So this is essentially a summary of the movie I would’ve made if someone gave me that ability. It’s not fully fleshed out, but I literally could not stop myself from typing it out once I starting piecing it together lmao

Even though this is my own creation, I still consider this a spoilery post SO WARNING FOR RISE OF SKYWALKER SPOILERS RIGHT HERE

I still think the best thing to do with ep 9 would be to centre it on the FO falling apart instead of ‘oh no daddy palps is back :o’. Truth be told, I’d rewrite TLJ too if I could, but I’m going to try to work within its constraints on this as well as keep some tros stuff intact for the sake of trying to work with it. So here’s the basic plot of what I would’ve liked to see:

Kylo undermining and removing authority from Hux while he focuses on Force stuff. He’s still looking for secrets and holocrons, but there’s no palpatine

Meanwhile the Resistance is working on building up their forces and helping the little people, plus trying to get info to take down the FO

The focus of the Resistance side is them trying to get the strength to face the FO and working together and all that good stuff. Focus more on the small acts of goodness in the galaxy that bring people together and end up with those they help joining the Resistance. That’s where they get their strength

Rey’s story would also be mostly about mastering the Force (and Leia still helps to train her) and the love and family she’s found among the Resistance. She’s still stupidly powerful though. I’d love to make her a Skywalker, but hell, it’d even work if she remained a nobody. TLJ was her crucible; she knows who she is now. She doesn’t need anyone else to tell or write her story for her

Also I really want her to go grey jedi. So maybe she realizes what Luke really meant: it was time for the jedi not truly to end, but to change. To embrace emotion without losing themselves to it. To realize that the only true way to achieve balance is not by staying light in order to defeat the dark, but instead learning to master both and keeping the balance within herself. That way, when the darkness is defeated, it won’t need to rise again: true balance. This would be her growth in the story, to learn how to embrace true balance in the Force

Also Finn’s story is still going to focus on the Stormtroopers (and Jannah can 100% still be there). So he finds Jannah and her team in Act 1, and then in Act 2 they unearth some secrets as to how Stormtroopers are brainwashed. Conditioning can’t be broken out of by will alone; Finn was Force sensitive. But something else happened with Jannah and her company. An idea is born: could they recreate that on a large scale and free them all? That’d be a huge blow to the FO and it would save all those troopers who never had a choice in what to be

Poe’s focus would still be on becoming the leader they need him to be, with lots of fun trio moments. So his wouldn’t actually change that much, but nothing about him being a drug dealer. I’m sure Zori could still be worked in but tbh I didn’t feel she added much to the plot

Rose is there a lot more too and comes along on all their adventures, happy to liberate anyone they can. She’s always been in it for the little people and that’s where she shines

Also Kylo is even more erratic, even more lost. He feels torn apart all over again. He’s not doing well as SL; he thought it would make things clearer, but it didn’t. He’s unstable and feral, focusing on all the wrong things and making bad choices because of it

Near the end of Act 1 of the movie, Hux betrays Kylo in a near deadly fashion, but Kylo manages to escape by the skin of his teeth

The Resistance gets word of a civil war within the FO. It;s Hux’s fleet (the red troopers + newer FO officers) vs Kylo’s fleet (mostly the older imperials who remember Vader + the KOR – you can keep Pryde here too if you want). This is their chance. They can take advantage of the chaos

While Kylo recovers from Hux’s attack, he starts having doubts again. Nothing has felt right since he became SL but what other choice does he have? He can’t go back, can he? He’s not supposed to want to. And even if he did, he’s too far gone to ever be welcomed, even by his own mother. So he continues fighting against Hux, more harried and haunted than ever

This situation degrades quickly. Both sides are getting hits in, but Hux is winning. Worse yet: it’s spilling over and doing collateral damage. Places controlled by the FO are being exploited, even worse atrocities being committed against them in this rapid arms race to superiority

Hell, maybe Hux’s fleet still has those planet-destroying canons like Palps’ fleet cause why not, everyone seems to think SW needs a superweapon in it. Anyway

There’d be more development on the heroes’ side as I detailed above here. Rey helping people and learning to be grey. Finn discovering the secrets of the Stormtrooper program. Poe becoming a leader. Rose comes with them on their journeys. Leia is heard rather than seen for the most part; she’s surviving this time around, but her presence is felt through her messages and dialogue snippets rather than physically being in the scenes. Some of the footage could be used, especially her hug with Rey, but I’d use much less of it

The Resistance knows they have to hurry. Do they have enough people? They have no idea, but they’re gonna try anyway. They have to. And you can still have Lando do basically the same thing; show up, be cool, then go get some more people

I’d like to do more with the KOR too, but tbh I’m not sure how other than just some scenes of them and Kylo doing Ren Stuff (whatever that may be). But there’d definitely be something

Near the end of Act 2, there’s a particularly brutal fight. I’d want Kylo and the KOR on the ground here, doing their shit. It feels kinda cheap to have him almost die again but tros also had 2 death fake outs for Kylo before the actual death so fuck it lmao. He thinks he’s going to win (maybe Hux is even there? Or maybe Phasma is revived? Or even just some fancy trooper akin to FN-2199 or something. Maybe it’s even Force-nullifying tech), but then the last minute he gets his shit wrecked

He’s dying. He reaches out with the Force, violently, affecting everyone. Rey hears it through the shattered bond. Finn even hears it, though faintly. It hits Leia hardest of all

Meanwhile, Kylo sees the ghost of Anakin instead of a vision of Han. Anakin, who knows better than anyone what it is to turn to the dark, but also what it is to turn away from it. The scene would still play out similarly, but not mirror the past scene with Han so much

(Look, I know a lot of people don’t like bendemption, but I think that redemption is always possible as long as it’s written well. And that applies to pretty much any character. TROS just needed more time to develop it, which I am attempting to do here by showing Kylo’s instability at the beginning)

Anakin manages to heal Kylo enough to bring him back from the brink of death, but not fully. I don’t think I want Kylo to toss away his lightsaber, but he still could. Regardless, there’s some sort of symbolic gesture to prove he’s changed his mind

A ship arrives: it’s the Resistance. Finn and Poe are cautious, but Rey doesn’t fear him. She confronts him about this sudden change of heart, but she can feel his sincerity. So she reassures Finn and Poe and they bring him along, though no one is really happy about it. They fix him up

With Kylo’s fleet all but destroyed, Hux is ready to take out the Resistance and everyone who sympathizes. Now perhaps we have a planet the trio had previously visited get destroyed. There’s still an ultimatum from the FO to obey or die. It’s a crackdown. A final act to ensure domination of the galaxy. Hell, you can even still call it the Final Order if you want to

The Resistance now strikes. Lando’s getting more back up, if he can, but they take who they’ve got. Kylo is there and there’s a lot of mistrust (could be played for humour too) but not enough time to get into it. They need to do this or too many will die. If he tries anything, Rey will strike him down and she tells him so. She’s done listening to his attempts to get under her skin

This Kylo is also definitely more Ben (I’m mixed on whether he should just go back to his old name or not so I’m keeping him Kylo for the sake of this summary). There’s guilt, though. A lot of it. You can see it on his face and in what he says. But helping to fix this will be a start. His crimes aren’t forgotten; he wants to make up for them however he can

Also Finnrey happens. They kiss before the fight this time and it’s very cute and romantic

So basically the end fight is Resistance fleet vs FO fleet. Poe is leading the charge. Meanwhile, Finn, Jannah, Rose and company sneak on to try to end FO conditioning. Rey and Kylo also sneak on; they’re going for Hux and the elite troops he uses as guards

Hux is going to have to have Force-nullifying tech of some sort (which I think is extremely underused in the SW universe as a whole btw). But he underestimates what Rey (powerful as fuck) and Kylo (Skywalker) are capable of

I’m not 100% sure how this fight plays out but I think I want Rey and Kylo to take out Hux’s elite troops without being able to use the Force. It’d be a fun struggle to watch and also make the fight much more visceral and difficult for them. But they both know how to fight, so they win

On the other side, Finn, Jannah, and Rose manage to do whatever to free the Stormtroopers from mind control (I’m not sure exactly how this would happen, but it’s star wars, it doesn’t need to make much sense). We get the first stage of a full trooper rebellion. They go after the officers immediately

Outside, Poe is struggling, just like in tros. They might lose this. Even if the landing party wins, there’s just too many of them. Cue Lando bringing a big fleet to help and giving us an epic space battle

Back inside: something exciting happens and it turns into a struggle between Hux’s tech and their combined Force powers. This is how I think it should go:

Kylo gives Rey his Force powers, which knocks him unconscious. Rey now has the power to break through on her own. It shouldn’t be possible. She sends out a concussive blast that knocks Hux back. The ideal here would be Hux being captured and taken in alive to be tried for war crimes, but I know that’s asking too much lmao so

If I can’t have definitively alive Hux: Rey approaches him but the ship makes a buckling noise; her Force powers compromised the structural integrity. Debris falls, obscuring Hux (and probably implying it killed him), and she knows it’s time to run. Kylo also comes to around this moment and follows

(And for real, I’m also okay with Hux dying for sure here, because at least he got to have his day first, but this is fantasy land lmao so I’m just not gonna have it happen as far as that goes)

Finn, Jannah, and Rose lead the stormtroopers onto transports as the ship starts falling apart. Rey and Kylo (and Hux, if I got my way) show up and make it in too. They take off and make it out just as the Finalizer crumples. Everyone lives! (Plus Hux is plausibly still alive even if I can’t have him definitely alive sdkfsdkl)

They call for the fleet to stop; the Stormtroopers on every destroyer are rising up, freed from their shackles. Shot of FO officers tied up and captured as the Stormtroopers, without their helmets, celebrate

A sidenote: I can’t decide whether I want Kylo to have lost his Force powers permanently by giving them to Rey or for him to get them back. I think losing them would be a good act of sacrificial penance, but at the same time, I’m not sure if that’s a thing so lmao. I’m open to possibilities here

End bit would still be a celebration. Rey and Finn and Poe still hug. The Stormtroopers are happy. We can still have that moment with Lando and Jannah; the implication of trying to find where every one of the troopers came from. The FO officers have been imprisoned. Everything is right in the galaxy again

Now there’s one more scene with Kylo: he stands in front of a door, looking pensive, squeezing and unsqueezing his hands into fists. The shot moves to his back and the door opens. You can’t see what’s inside but you hear: “Ben?” followed by a pause, and then a small, broken “Mom.”. He steps inside and starts to fall to his knees. End scene

Now, as a last scene, we could still do Rey having a funeral for Luke on Tatooine and keep the ending shot basically the same except Leia and her saber aren’t there because Leia is alive. Rey could still decide to be a Skywalker if she’s a nobody. The shot of two suns. The End.

#oh boy I need to stop saying things about this movie and just move on lmao #but god could you imagine?#I think this would've been really cool #might be a little anime lmao but fuck it star wars has never been super deep anyway #I really did try to give every character something so I hope I succeeded!#shut up nerd #meta #text #long post #tros spoilers #rise of skywalker spoilers #spoilers

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drowning-in-dennor · 5 years ago

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Epilogue

In his final moments, Harald enjoys a bedtime story from his older brothers. [This takes place in the same universe as Every Time You Kissed Me.]

He has been dreading this day since Harald was born.

Nothing seems to have changed — his baby brother gets home from school, finishes his homework and invites a few of his friends over. It’s completely normal. But, as he watches Harald mess around with his friends, Stellan cannot help the dread piling up inside him.

He continues to watch, and suddenly, as though taken back in time, he is ten years old again. The brief conversation between his parents and the local doctor replay in his head; their long, grave conversation regarding the illness plaguing Harald.

“As of now, there is no cure for him,” one of the doctors said.

“There is no way to prevent his death, only to delay it,” the other announced.

And they showed Stellan’s parents just what would be done to keep Harald alive, all those strange procedures that wouldn’t have helped anyway. They couldn’t afford them, not a single one. He listened numbly, to those big words and stared at Harald, playing with his toys at the corner of the room.

They were given the exact date Harald was to die, apologised to and promptly ushered out of the clinic. Stellan clutched Harald’s hand tightly, so much that it must’ve hurt, all the way home.

Six years later, his parents are not present any more, let alone capable of paying for the medicine to save Harald. Stellan returns his attention to the pot of stew bubbling away on the stove, although he is still listening to Harald and his friends playing their games.

Dinner is nothing grand. Harald talks with his mouth full, nearly spills his glass of water and drops his fork, but Stellan doesn’t have the heart to tell him off. He smiles at Harald’s classmates, all innocent little twelve-year-olds unaware that they are about to lose their friend, asks them to share about their shenanigans at school. The conversation is so rowdy, so cheerful that he nearly forgets about what will happen.

Not long after, all the children have left, running home under the setting sun after goodbye-hugs for Harald. Stellan places a hand on his brother’s shoulder, forces himself to keep his emotions under his control, and says, “go take a bath. I’m going to Henrik’s.”

The journey to his lover’s house takes no time at all. Stellan nearly collapses into Henrik’s arms, just barely holding his tears back as he stammers, “Harald — he — tonight, oh goodness, he’s going to — “

“I know.” Steadfast arms wrap around him, pull him upright. Henrik shuts the door behind him and holds him all the way back home.

When they reach home, Harald has finished taking a bath, and sits at his bed waiting for his hair to dry with a towel around his shoulders. Henrik reaches him first and tackles him in a hug, bowling him sideways into the mattress. Stellan watches, still too somber to smile, as he and Harald get into a quick pillow fight that ends with Henrik (and the blanket) being kicked onto the floor, feathers littering the mattress and Harald’s hair being shaken dry.

He cannot help the chuckle that escapes his lips. Stellan forces himself to look stern as he orders Henrik to sweep up the feathers and dispose of the burst pillow, then for Harald to pick up the blanket and get into bed. The joyous moment is gone, as quickly as it started.

Once the bedroom is tidied up, Stellan tucks Harald in, staring into eyes that already look glassy. “Do you want to hear a bedtime story?”

Harald pouts, sticking his arm out to poke him in the forehead. “I’m too old for bedtime stories.”

“Nobody’s too old for bedtime stories!” Henrik returns, a few feathers still stuck to his shirt. “When I’m feeling sad, I wouldn’t object to falling asleep to one.”

For a while, Harald just stares up at the ceiling, and he is silent for so long that Stellan fears his time has come too early. But then he mutters, with all the faux-resentment of a preteen, “okay, fine.”

Henrik grins (the tears threatening to break through are badly-hidden), reaching his little bookshelf with a few large strides. “What do you want to read?”

Stellan points instead at the thin volume on Harald’s reading desk. “How about we finish that tonight?” He picks it up, runs his fingers over the gold-embossed words that line the hardback cover — The Snow Queen. “You were up to the fifth story yesterday, right?”

“Mmhmm.” Harald props himself up slightly and closes his eyes. Stellan hands the book to Henrik and waits for him to begin. He takes his little brother’s hand and presses a thumb to his pulse, still hammering steadily, albeit slowly.

“Story six: The Lapp Woman and The Finn Woman...”

Dread, cold and nauseous, settles in his stomach. Stellan holds Harald tighter, trying to record the sound of his heartbeat in his memory. At a disgruntled squeak, he realises he has been squeezing too hard. He simply cannot enjoy the story.

Thump, thump.

The only sounds in the bedroom are those of Henrik’s voice, the turning of pages and their quiet breathing. Harald’s slowly-failing heart is clearly struggling to beat. His heartbeats slow. His breaths grow. Henrik must know this, but his voice remains steady as he continues to read. Stellan envies his calmness.

“As soon as Gerda had thawed out, and had had something to eat and drink, the Lapp woman wrote a few words on a dried codfish, told Gerda to take good care of it, and tied her again on the back of the reindeer. Off he ran, and all night long the skies crackled and swished as the most beautiful Northern Lights flashed over their heads.”

Thump, thump. Heartbeats grow even more sluggish. Henrik reads on.

“She took the reindeer aside in a corner, and while she was putting another piece of ice on his head she whispered to him: ‘Little Kay is indeed with the Snow Queen, and everything there just suits him fine. He thinks it is the best place in all the world, but that's because he has a splinter of glass in his heart and a small piece of it in his eye. Unless these can be gotten out, he will never be human again, and the Snow Queen will hold him in her power.’”

Thump, thump. Harald gasps. Stellan presses a kiss to his forehead, murmuring half-hearted reassurances that he probably doesn’t hear. Still, Henrik reads on.

“Little Gerda walked on, unmolested and cheerful. The angels rubbed her hands and feet to make them warmer, and she trotted briskly along to the Snow Queen's palace. But now let us see how little Kay was getting on. Little Gerda was furthest from his mind, and he hadn't the slightest idea that she was just outside the palace.”

Thump, thump. Harald’s eyes squint half-open. They are glassy. He exhales, going limp beneath his blanket. All three of them know that it won’t be long.

“Story seven...”

Thump.

The warmth of his hand is still there, still lingering, but it is fading. His fingers are limp. Nestled in his bed, surrounded by untidied feathers and his two loving brothers, Harald lies. His eyes are half-open. He appears to be smiling; he must have liked the story.

Letting go of his brother’s stiffening hand, Stellan gets up and presses his forehead to Harald’s, finally letting himself cry. His tears fall on the sheets, staining them dark with his despair. Eyes blurred, he cannot see Henrik, but the gasps that sound behind him are clear evidence of his grief.

The night is long. Stellan and Henrik remain next to Harald, small and vulnerable and long-snatched from life, in vigil until the sun rises.

#aph anko family #APH Whale Brothers #aph dennor #APH Denmark #APH Norway #APH Iceland #aph fanfiction #my writing #aph suffering #hahaha

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ramblingshit · 5 years ago

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The Rise of Skywalker (2019)

• a growing list of my thoughts on episode 9 -- spoilers bruh spoilers--

▪︎ His death was really best case scenario for him - imagine returning to the light side to be faced with what you've done: killed his father yes, but also literally millions and millions of other people including entire worlds. Everyone knows who he is and what he's done. There's nowhere in the galaxy he could hide. But imagine knowing that you've done all that he had - how could he possibly live with himself, there's literally nothing he could possibly do to make things right, and the memories in his head of what he's done with his own hands. So, to die having saved Rey from the Emperor and from herself, and inadvertently helping to end the Sith and the war that he helped begin, held in her arms, knowing that he is loved and that he's finally done the right thing - it's really the best end a redeemed villain could ask for.

• Rey killed Kylo Ren with his own saber, and literally healed Ben Solo. Poetic cinema.

▪︎'Dad--' // 'I know.' (!!!!!!!!! kill me)

• They should have had the three together bouncing off one another from the start - that's always been the greatest part of Star Wars, people being friends and bickering and having each other's backs. Actually had an interest in their relationships and in their characters this time. Their hug at the end was emotional and satisfying.

• Rose was always a nothing character to me, she should have died during that crash to make a point to Finn about doing the right thing or fighting the war or whatever. Also love that their kiss was never mentioned again (thank fuck).

▪︎On that note tho - plot holes. Plot holes everywhere. Not even just one or two. A million plot holes. Things mentioned briefly but never explained. Things glossed over and ignored. It's like they made this enormous tale that needed to be smoothed and simplified so you're not distracted every two seconds tryna figure out what matters and what's never gonna be mentioned again

• Chewie falling to his knees and roaring in agony when he finds out that Leia is dead is finally respect to his character and his relationships with his friends who are all fkn dead

▪︎legit nearly walked out when they suggested that Chewie was dead - that would have been 100% unforgiveable

• Ben Solo's death was 100% glossed over and Rey's reaction could have been a lot more poignant and long lasting. Anakin got his funeral, why can't Ben?

• Every minute of every force bond chat and fight was 10/10.

▪︎Fkn hobbit had more screen time than half the characters combined like who tf

▪︎that lil droid was legit funny and adorable but so so clearly another cash grab damn

▪︎Been a long time since I've seen anything sexier than everything that is light-side Ben Solo.

▪︎the ow, the shrug, the smile - little glimpses of the man he was supposed to be, instead of the diabolical, tyrannical, genocidal torturing, manipulative monster he became (rip Ben Solo, your family let you tf down)

▪︎Air punched and almost yelled YES in the cinema when they fucking kisssssssseeedddd!!!!

▪︎Actually really happy with her being a Palpatine, it's the only thing that could make sense and I legit didn't see it coming - being a Kenobi would be too predictable and though Obi Wan defeated Vader at Mustafar, it was because he was so blinded by rage, not because Kenobi was stronger than him

Upon further consideration Rey should have just been Rey. People were so obsessed with who her family were because of course a person is defined by their parents and no way could a random person step up and defeat the bad guys (/s). She didn't have to be related to any legacy character. Heroes are made, not born. She followed the light because she's a good person, and she struggled against the dark because she's human. Gah.

▪︎Actually cried out in shock when she used force lightning to destroy the transport - that is a dark side move my dude, (and Palpatines fav party trick)

▪︎ loved the rehash of Ben and Han's final moments - he said himself he was just Bens memory, and Ben then did what he deep down wanted to do the day he killed him

▪︎Luke snatching the lightsaber out of the air like what the fuck do you think you are doing young lady

▪︎legit woulda been down for Rey to become Empress of the Sith what an ending that would be ey

▪︎Anakin should have showed up

▪︎Once Ben turned light-side he should have been talked to by his dead family members, not Rey.

▪︎Ben, the last Skywalker, should have been the one to defeat Palpatine, who was the one to begin the saga of the Skywalkers. Instead he got yeeted into a hole and spent the final battle time tryna climb out of it.

▪︎Ben should have been a force ghost standing there with his parents, reunited at last

▪︎And when they were both still alive Ben and Leia should have 110% reunited like what the fuckkk

▪︎ Rey should have proudly said that she is 'Just Rey.'

▪︎Finnpoe should have 100% been canon - Oscar Isaac literally admitted scorning the Disney 'overlords' for being cowards, and he played his role as Poe as being romantically involved with Finn. 10/10 best LGBT+ ally.

▪︎why tf would she go to Tatooine? She hates sand. Anakin hated sand. Luke wanted to leave and his last memory of that place is leaving the smoldering bodies of his aunt and uncle behind. Why put his saber there. Leia's never even been there. Why not go to Naboo or some green beautiful place where Rey has always wanted to be? Only fanservice moment really that irked me

▪︎all along all she's wanted was a family - she's made one and found one and yet the movie ends with her standing alone in the sand on a planet shes never been to, with two droids, looking at a horizon that means nothing to her.

▪︎that lightsaber tho (wish we had seen her make it, or decide to make it and explain at all why it's yellow)

▪︎Finn is fkn force sensitive and that's hella cool but like... address it more, make something of this discovery - this is the last movie and this is only just coming up? To be forgotten like all the other plot holes

▪︎liked Palpatine as the all over enemy - should have been more hints throughout the films fo sure to make it feel less outta left field as it did but still could've been a lot worse - but what the fuck is he doing on that Glados arm thing he shouldve been a Sith ghost ala Marka Ragnos not weird zombie sith man

▪︎lightning powers fucking up an entire fleet is fkn siiiiiiickkkk

▪︎would his dumbass really fall for the same ol bounce his own lightning back at him trick? Mmmmmnghhh??

▪︎if someone could explain why/how Leia died and became one with the Force only when Ben died that would be g??

▪︎thought they did Rey's struggle between the dark and the light pretty damn well like shout out to Daisy Ridley

▪︎ wish we had a shot of that vision she had with she and Kylo on the Sith throne together like damn son whhhyyy deprive us of that?? that shit would make my lifeeee

▪︎just everything Adam Driver tho what an actor like damn

▪︎in a story about love and family and winning by saving what you love, there's a whole lot of lovers dying and family members being torn apart and never reconciling. The entire Skywalker line did nothing but fuck up and make mistakes (excluding our Princess) - Anakin was so scared of losing Padme that the power he gained by turning darkside to save her overwhelmed him and resulted in her death, Padme thought it was a good idea to help Anakin defy the Jedi and marry him thus leading to his fear of losing her, Luke went full dark side when he sensed a growing darkness in his nephew and instead of trying to have a chat about his feelings he decided the obvious answer was to just murder him (like what???) thus fully pushing Ben over the edge to become Kylo Ren.

And then every single one of them die. How the fuck is that a satisfying conclusion to their story? I'm sorry but a happy ending to the Skywalker saga is Not the entire family being fucking DEAD. There is no happy ending to their story. Because they're all dead. This is some bullshit.

▪︎give us the almighty rumoured alternate ending you cowards

▪︎Honestly, the Skywalkers deserved better.

#spoilers #star wars spoilers #ep 9 spoilers #thoughts #list #rambling #rambling shit #also some spoilers #dont be spoiled #by the spoilers #rise of skywalker #actually thought it was called the last skywalker for a minute there #star wars the rise of skywalker #sw: tros #tros #happy and angry

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