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themonotonysyndrome · 3 years ago

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REDACTED verse - A dinner and a show

Prompt: any | any | competition

Word Count: 2,460

Author/Team: LadyMonotone

Fandom/Original: Redacted ASMR (Vincent Solaire/Lovely)

Rating: T

Triggers: Explicit implications

Summary: It's a tradition within the Solaire Clan that the King would visit his progenies from time to time. Tonight, Will is coming over to Vincent & Lovely's apartment for dinner. What's not a tradition is the karaoke competition that comes afterwards.

ConCrit: Y

I don’t know what happened. This oneshot just went out of my control but I had so much fun writing it today! I hope you guys enjoyed it!

Also, I just realised that all the characters in my oneshots have been eating lately. Oh my god, I got so hungry when I was writing them that I subconsciously includes food in some of the scenes 😭 Food is my love language so I guess it’s cute that the bois and their lovers would sit down and eat together.

That being said, I hope you guys will crave Korean food as much as I am in this oneshot! 😅

“Vincent? I need your help. Can you tell me what’s Will's favourite colours?”

“Lovely - ”

“Because I have some formal outfits in our closet, but they don’t mean shit if Will hate the colours.”

“Lovely, hang on - ”

“Is he allergic to perfumes? Colognes? I have some soft-scented bottles that should be Vampire-friendly! I think? Most of them are floral though… oh! Does he have a favourite flower? Do you think I should buy some before he comes over?”

“What? No, Lovely, I think you’re working yourself up - ”

“I know you bought some blood bags for dinner but do you think we should cook some food too? Does Will like to eat? Shit, I knew I should have bought some groceries yesterday after class!”

“You’re not listening to me at all, Lovely…”

“We have to clean up the whole place too. I don’t know how our furniture gets so dusty so quickly! I just wiped them down a few days ago!”

“...”

“Do you think I should do my hair too? It’s a bit of a mess lately; I could use a trim. Does Will - ”

Lovely's eyes widen as a deep kiss suddenly silences them. Their heart pounds when Vincent brings them close to his chest, trapping his lover in his arms. Lovely's eyes flutter close when he pulls away to press butterfly kisses on their neck. They couldn’t help it; they moan and tilt their head back when they feel fangs delicately drag down their tender skin.

“Vincent!” Lovely hisses, not sure for what, though, when Vincent's fangs pinprick where their pulse is.

“Oh? Are you finally with me again, Lovely?” Vincent breathes, loving how their heart begins to beat faster and faster in anticipation. His chest reverberates when he chuckles deeply. “There we go… I have your attention again, little one.”

They grumbled at the unfairness of it all. Just as Lovely knew all of Vincent’s weaknesses and tickle spots, he knew how weak their knees behaved when he pressed his fangs to any parts of his partner's body. Especially down south.

“I’m serious here, Vince.” Lovely whines. “There are so many things we have to do before Will comes over for dinner tonight. I want to make sure everything’s perfect.”

Vincent gives Lovely a deadpan look. They would’ve coo at how adorable he looks if it weren’t for his Vampiric speed and his habit of chucking them onto the bed whenever Lovely is being too stubborn to listen to reason. “Lovely? A question: are you dating my Sire or me?”

Lovely blinks; they didn’t expect that. “Uh, you, duh.”

“Then trust me, as your boyfriend,” Lovely has no idea why Vincent emphasised that last word, but they knew better than to interrupt him when he gets like this. “That everything’s going to be fine. Besides, I told you that while this might look like the whole ‘meeting the parent’ shtick, the relationship between a Sire and their Progeny is way more than that.” He patiently reminds them.

“Well yeah, but he means a lot to you.” Lovely points out. Now, why did Vincent look so surprised at that? “So that means he’s important to me too. That’s why this dinner has to be perfect.”

For a moment, Vincent said nothing. He just stares at them in wonderment.

Lovely let out a surprised squeak when Vincent suddenly crushed them in a hug. “How did I get so damn lucky with you, Lovely?” He murmurs, face buried on top of their head. “Sometimes I think that you’re… too amazing to be real.”

So soft and sweet; that’s Vincent. Lovely lets him cuddle them like his personal teddy bear until he's satisfied.

“Now, I need you to do something for me, Lovely. Do you think you can do it?”

Lovely raise an eyebrow. “Depends on what it is, Vince. I haven’t eaten anything yet, so I can only give you at least four hours in bed - ”

“N-Not that!” Vincent hurries to interject, a brilliant red blush runs across his cheeks despite him being a Vampire. He coughs once to get them on track, playfully glaring at Lovely for trying to distract him. “Geez, Lovely. It’s still way too early for… that. But we're definitely going to revisit that. Anyway, I need you to calm down for a second, OK? Will is a pretty chill guy and an open-minded Sire. He knows how much I love you, so you have nothing to worry about.” He gently assures them, rubbing calming motions up and down Lovely's back.

Lovely could feel their anxiety melts away. Just enough for them to finally breathe again ever since Vincent dropped the bomb that William Solaire will be coming over for dinner tonight.

Apparently, everyone in the Clan knows that the King would visit his Progenies at least once a month to check up on them. Just like how a parent would drop by their children's home for a visit, in Lovely's opinion.

“Ok. You win, baby.” Lovely sighs, loving how his rubbing eases the tense muscles. They arch their back like a pleased, spoiled cat when Vincent messages that spot below their shoulders. “Ooooh, yes, that’s the spot!”

Once Lovely's bones feel like they could melt at any time, they throw Vincent a grateful smile.

“Now, there’s the smile I’ve been missing the whole day!” Vincent teases. “C’mon Lovely, let’s plan for dinner before we take our nap. How do you feel about seafood?”

“Oh, I can go for some seafood. It’s been a while.”

“Spicy steamed crabs with scallops, battered pan-fry oysters and some chilled bowl of rice top with raw salmon and sea bass with slices of your favourite veggies? All Korean-style."

“Hell yes. I think we have all the ingredients for that. Wait. Err, can Will handle spicy food?”

"Uh... I have no idea. Maybe we should hold back on that spicy steamed crabs with scallops just in case."

Ever since the two started living together, Vincent really took a shine when it came to cooking and baking. The idea of providing for Lovely makes him ridiculously happy, and besides, him whipping up healthy and delicious food for them results in much richer and sweeter blood flowing within his lover for him to feed on so… win-win!

As the two of them traverse to the kitchen to start preparing the ingredients for dinner, Lovely slowly gain the confidence that their dinner tonight with Vincent's Sire will turn out alright.

And before both of them knew it, the sun had set.

After a fresh shower, the entire apartment is now spotless (to Lovely's standard), and dinner is served on the table, the doorbell rings.

"I'll get it!" Lovely announce just as Vincent finish putting down the plates. They smoothen out the creases on their clothes, roll their shoulders before taking a deep, calming breath and answer the door. Like a soldier marching towards the battlefield.

Seeing his partner's dramatic reaction, Vincent just shakes his head.

As soon as Lovely opens the door, William Solaire greets them. "Good evening. I hope I'm not too early. The evening traffic has been quite a hassle lately. I figured that even if I'm a bit early, I could help you and Vincent in the kitchen." Will explains. In his arms is a bouquet of white pear blossoms, yellow gladioluses and red tulips. When Lovely stares at them curiously, Will smiles knowingly. "Vincent informed me that you don't drink, so I decided that flowers would be the appropriate gift as oppose to a bottle of champagne."

"They're so pretty." Lovely reply, breathless when they receive the bouquet. "Thank you so much, Will! I'll put them in a vase now. Oh, and please come in." They graciously step aside to let Vincent's Sire in.

While Lovely is busy rummaging for a vase in the storeroom, Will and Vincent make small talks over at the dining table. Vincent passes the ancient Vampire a tall glass of blood which Will accept with gratitude.

"Hey, Will. How's it going?"

"I'm fine, Vincent. Thank you for asking." Will reply after dabbing the bloodstain on the corner of his lips. "The Clan is the same as usual; Our Newborn members have finally settled in nicely, much to Sam's relief. I plan to visit them next week."

Vincent tops up Will's empty glass before replying. "That's great to hear." He's about to say something else before a loud bang against the wall in the storeroom stops him. "Uh, Lovely? Is everything OK in there?" He calls out.

"It's fine, it's fine!" Lovely shouts back. "I found the perfect vase for the flowers!"

Vincent groans in exasperation. When Will throws him a confused expression, Vincent is compelled to explain. "Look, Will, Lovely has been freaking out about tonight's dinner the whole day. They think that if it turns out anything but perfect, you're going to be disappointed in them. So just... just play along, alright?"

Will chuckles; his heart warms at the thought that Lovely holds him in such high regard. What an adorable human. "Is that so? Very well then, I will play the perfect guest towards such kind hosts."

And true to his words, when Lovely joins them at the table after putting the vase full of flowers on the coffee table in the living room, Will waste no time in kicking his charm to the max. In between their meal, Will makes sure to compliment Lovely's outfit (which earned him a shy yet pleased blush from Lovely and a jealous kick at his shin from Vincent). He then comments that the spicy steamed seafood dish is his favourite, and when desserts are introduced, Will gently helps Lovely open up by asking about their interests and hobbies.

Will is pleasantly surprised to find one of the many common grounds they share: their love for analysing music.

"I find RM to be one of the most brilliant lyricists in this generation." Will states once his bowl of red bean shaved ice is empty. "His songs are undoubtedly impactful for the youths of today. Not to mention that I'm quite fond of his wordplays."

"You're into K-pop!?" Lovely ask, utterly gobsmacked. Their eyes are wide in shock.

Vincent snorts. "Alexis is a BTS fan. Somehow, she managed to convert Will too."

When Lovely turn to face Will once more, their expression frozen in disbelieve, he adds, "We're planning to catch their concert once the situation permits it."

Will's pop culture admission finally broke the ice. Lovely laughs in delight before launching themselves into an animated conversation about modern music with Will.

However, it wasn't long before their topic suddenly went off the rail when Vincent claimed that he's a better shower singer than Lovely.

"Oh please, Vince, I thought you were dying in the bathroom," Lovely interjects with a roll of their eyes. Vincent splutters at his partner's cruel remark, but Lovely presses on without mercy, much to Will's amusement. He resolutely keeps his mouth shut despite his growing grin slowly making its way up to his face. "Face it, you're tone-deaf. Being a Vampire doesn't magically make you a good singer."

"Those are some fighting words, Lovely. Can you back them up?"

"We can settle this tonight if you want. You and me; we can duke it out in a singing swag off with Will as the judge." Lovey declares with a smirk before they head into the living room. All revved up as if their previous anxiety over dinner had never happened.

"Oh my..."

Vincent turns to Will with a grateful nod. "Thanks for helping them relax. And hey, you don't have to stay if you have some other plans tonight, Will."

Will stares back at his Progeny with a faux, scandalous look on his face, complete with a hand on his chest. "Why, Vincent, where would I be anywhere but here? It's not every day that I get to see you humbled by your lover. Don't think I forget that you were once known as the Playboy of the Solaire Clan."

Shock looks good on Vincent's face. It's cute that he actually forgot how he was before Lovely walks into his life. Oh, Will is going to milk this for all its worth.

"Alright! The system is set up!" Lovely announce from near the TV with a microphone in their hand. "Will, come on! You need to help me prove that Vincent sings like a dying cat. Here, here!"

"Oi, oi! We haven't even started yet!" Vincent rebuke and flits over to grab the spare microphone. "You know what, Lovely? I'm so confident that I'll win this that I'll let you go first."

Lovely grins viciously and accepts his offer. Once Will makes himself comfortable on the couch and signals for them to begin, Lovely open their mouth,

Will couldn't stop smiling as Lovely sings their heart out, and Vincent makes his grand entrance after they're done (singing one of Will's favourite songs in hopes to sway his Sire to his side). Vincent and Lovely are having the time of their life, teasing one another as they sing. Will commits this night into one of his most cherished memories.

*"Dari apa yang aku perhatikan

Manusia mahu senang tapi tak semua mahu berkorban

Dari apa yang mereka katakan

Ada yang jawab jujur tapi selebihnya kuat beralasan..."

However, as the night grows long, Will doesn't have the heart to tell them that they both are horrible singers.

Tonight, it's Sam's turn. Will deliver three knocks on his door before Sam swings it open. He looks exhausted, unamused and seconds away from running out of the house.

"Good evening, Sam."

"Good evening, William. Before you come in, can I ask why my Progenies insist on having a karaoke competition tonight? On the night where they knew you were coming?"

Will begins to smile widely. Both he and Sam could hear a heated argument between Frederick and Bright Eyes from the living room.

"No, you can't sing Bambi, Bright Eyes. I won't allow it! You're going to break the windows!"

"Oh my god, would you let me live, Freddy!?"

"We've been over this; you can't sing! Wait. What are you - put down that microphone - "

Music starts to play at maximum volume, and then,

Sam closed his eyes and sighed deeply and in resignation when Bright Eyes began to sing louder to drown out Frederick's shrieking.

**“Feel it like memalla itteon mam wiro

seumyeodeun danbi

dabi piryo eopji

Because you’re my favourite..."

"I don't know what had happened - and I honestly don't want to know - but I hope you're ready to deal with these two tonight."

"Why, Sam, where would I be anywhere but here?"

These are the English translations & link to the songs that Lovely and Bright Eyes were singing:

*“From what I can see

People want the good life, but are not willing to sacrifice

From what I hear

Some are honest but others are full of excuses...”

**“Feel it like timely rain that seeps into my dry heart

No other answer is needed

Because you’re my favorite...”

#redacted asmr #fanfic #they/them pronouns #gender neutral s/o #vincent solaire #lovely (listener)#william solaire #sam collins #frederick #bright eyes (listener)#pop culture references

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teddybasmanov · 4 years ago

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Hi there, Redacted ASMR Tumblr. No, wrong. Hi there, three and a half people, who actually read my gibberish. Yeah, that seems about right.

So, I’ve already mentioned it somewhere but I misunderstood an answer about characters’ names from the first Q&A and found out the meanings of names of all characters. I know for sure now, that most of those meanings are well... meaningless because I directly asked and got my answer in the second Q&A, but I still have this list and I thought that maybe there are more people out there willing to look for deeper meaning, where there’s none.

So, I present to you:

List of meanings of names of Redacted ASMR characters (with my silly commentaries)

(Most of the meanings are from Wikipedia and has actual sources and explanations, but some are just from websites for future parents and have no factual support. If a demonic name is a star I also give the name of the constellation. In no particular order.)

Vincent - conquering, winning.

Adam - the ground or earth.

Ivan - God is gracious. (ironic, huh)

Oliver - olive tree planter, all true.

David - Beloved. (he sure is)

Marcus - dedicated to Mars.

Brachium - the upper arm (also measure of length); σ Librae - scales or balance. (this actually has a meaning and I don’t mean the arm)

Caelum - chisel; sky, heaven. (but Elliot has already told us)

Elliott - with Strength and Right, Bravely and Truly.

Gavin - God send or white hawk. (GOD SEND)

Vindemiator/trix - grape-harvester/ress; ε Virginis - virgin. (this is Gavin’s dead name and it’s also kind of ironic)

Asher - happy or blessed. (self-explainatory)

Lasko - nickname for a work-weary person. (yes, I’m aware of the fan)

Damien - to conquer, master, overcome, tame. (this one makes so much sense!)

Kody - helpful, prosperous. (helpful, my ass)

Huxley - Hugh's meadow. (sweet, but has the least sources)

Milo - soldier or merciful.

Avior - my father is light; ε Carinae - the hull or keel of a ship.

Vega - the falling (eagle). (more like “fallen” now)

Camelopardalis - giraffe.

Sam - God has heard.

Frederick - peaceful ruler.

William - vehement protector.

Aaron - warrior lion, mountain of strength.

Blake - black/dark, pale or "Son of lake".

Brian - high or noble. (when I said “all characters”, I meant all characters)

Crux - (Southern) Cross, also means the decisive or most important point at issue.

James - supplanter (someone or something taking the place of another, as through force, scheming, strategy, or the like), one who follows. (holly hell)

Gabe (Gabriel) - God is my strength.

Christian - follower of Christ.

Arden - great forest or enthusiastic.

Kelsey - ship's island or victory ship.

Amanda - beautiful, deserving to be loved or the loved one. (very true)

Alexis - helper or defender.

Quinn - wise or counsel. (almost no evidence)

Saul - ask, question.

Morgan - sea chief or famous magic. (sounds so cool, honestly)

Tyler - maker or layer of tiles, house builder or doorkeeper of inn or tavern. (this seems specific).

Xavier - new house or castle. (He’s just messing with us at this point, isn’t he? The dude who’s only characteristic at the time was having a cool big new house has a name that means new house)

Ezekiel - God's Strength.

Josh(ua) - the lord is salvation.

Guy - Ravine or forest, guide.

Hudson - son of Hugh.

Marie - bitter or beloved or rebelliousness or wished-for child or drop of the sea. (yeah, there’s a lot)

Colm - dove.

Regulus - prince, little king.

All possible additions, corrections and smarter commentaries are very welcome as always.

#redacted asmr #names #character names #name meanings #constellations #deeper meaning #seriously every time I think of the meaning of Damien's name #I'm like hell I can't believe Eric didn't actually look that up before naming him like that #same with kody

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confetti-cupcake · 3 years ago

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👀 if you are still doing it because I cannot get enough of either of your wips!

Aw, thank you for the ask! Knowing how excited you are for both of these fics makes me so happy! ❤️ How about another one from The Perfect Match, only this time from Buck's POV?

This one is kind of a flashback to an earlier part of the day (hence, why most of it is in italics) that he's recounting as he's standing waiting for the first getaway challenge to start. This is the morning after the rager featured in Eddie's snippet, where, as you may be able to tell from the context, some ~drama~ occurred 👀

(Don't hate me, but I etched out a certain person's name in this section to avoid spoilers 😅)

He had rolled out of bed and slipped into the kitchen, hoping to make a light breakfast to avoid having to take painkillers on an empty stomach. A cursory glance around the bedroom had told him that most of his castmates were sleeping in, and he was optimistic that at least if he had to spend time self-loathing, he’d get to do it in peace. But as fate would have it, Eddie, of all people, was sitting at the kitchen island behind a bowl of cereal, with a front-row seat to his pity party.

“Hey, rough night last night. How are you feeling?” he had asked.

Shitty. Regretful. Embarrassed. But Buck sure as hell wasn’t going to give Eddie the satisfaction by telling him that. So he said nothing.

“Look man, I’m sorry if something I said last night struck a nerve,” he offered again. “I was just trying to help. Tough love and all that, you know?”

Eddie’s words screeched like nails on a chalkboard as they reverberated through his head, sending him internally reeling with discomfort and pain. But Buck continued his vow of silence, opening the loaf of whole grain bread on the counter and depositing two slices into the toaster. God, he wished he would just stop talking.

“Well, if this is how it’s going to be, fine,” Eddie relented. “Can I just give you some advice though, man to man? I know you’re excited about [redacted]. But just… don’t get too excited that you miss out on other connections, okay?”

Buck immediately whirled around at that. “Excuse me?”

Eddie stared back at him, mouth closed around a bite of cereal, as if he hadn’t expected him to suddenly find his voice.

“She’s one person out of seventeen,” he said casually after he had swallowed, like he would about the weather, or the Dodgers game, or any other inane small talk topic. “And she seems like she wants to get to know other people. No reason why you shouldn’t, too.”

The offhand way with which he criticized their relationship was deeply aggravating. “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” he snapped. “She told me she’s serious about us.”

“Oh. Okay,” Eddie acquiesced. “When did that happen?”

“Last night,” Buck said. “After you went to bed.”

Eddie studied him carefully, like he couldn’t figure out if Buck was telling the truth. Granted, the memory of it was hazy and muddled — it probably happened at his peak insobriety — but it had happened, all the same. Buck would never have forgotten how the moment made him feel. Validated by a mutual desire to get to know each other, and only each other.

“Okay, I’m sorry,” Eddie said gently after a while, holding up his hands in surrender. “I’m glad for you. But you can still get to know other people without the physical stuff.” Buck just blinked, unsure of what to say to that. “This is a group effort, you know? So, as much as you may not want me to, I have to look out for you.”

“Who says I need looking out for?” Buck asked, affronted. “I don’t need you looking over my shoulder, being the perfect match police, every second of the game. I’m not a child.”

“I know you’re not,” Eddie said, once again, infuriatingly casual. “But we’re all in this together. Win as a team, lose as a team. And I don’t want to see you closing yourself off to other people here because you’re stuck on something that isn’t as deep as you want it to be.”

Buck pushed closer to the counter, indignation bubbling over. “What I have with [redacted] is none of your business,” he seethed. “Our relationship is fine. Great, even,” he added when Eddie raised an eyebrow. “You’ll see when we kick your ass at the challenge today.”

Eddie scanned him with that same, scrutinizing stare for a beat before sighing. “Suit yourself,” he said before sipping his coffee, not the least bit perturbed.

Send me a 👀 and I’ll post a snippet from a WIP!

#ask box #halsteadsass #the perfect match feed #ask game #wip ask game #fic snippet #buddie #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911 fic

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you-cant-spell-subtext-without · 4 years ago

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Since [redacted] seems to have forgotten the character of Sam Winchester, I wanted to give everyone a brief reminder that this is Not My Sam Winchester. Not the one who always wanted Dean to fight to keep living, to keep loving, to keep embracing that he is worthy and valued and deserving of happiness and a fulfilled life. Not the one who got addicted to demon blood so he could save people possessed by demons by pulling the demon out of them without harming their bodies. Not this Sam. Sam Winchester is not a man who would be happy someone else died so he could live.

But since we are all talking about it, buddies -

[insert banner art with WINC*ST shippers keep your hands off this post here]

Receipts after the cut.

(I also wanted to add that honestly this commentary is not surprising. See this post.)

2x22 All Hell Breaks Loose (part 2)

SAM (Voice breaking)

How long do you get?

DEAN

One year. (SAM nods, tears in his eyes.) I got one year.

SAM

You shouldn't've done that. How could you do that?

DEAN

Don't get mad at me. Don't you do that. I had to. I had to look out for you. That's my job.

SAM

And what do you think my job is?

DEAN

What?

SAM

You've saved my life over and over. I mean, you sacrifice everything for me. Don't you think I'd do the same for you?

And I don't care what it takes, I'm gonna get you out of this. Guess I gotta save your ass for a change.

3x10 Dream a Little Dream of Me

05x22 Swan Song

DEAN

So then what am I supposed to do? SAM

You go find Lisa. You pray to god she's dumb enough to take you in, and you – you have barbecues and go to football games. You go live some normal, apple-pie life, Dean. Promise me.

8x22 Clip Show

SAM

You heard Crowley. He's not gonna let one near us, and without a demon, all we can do is sit back and watch people we know, people we saved, die like Sarah.

DEAN

So what are you saying?

SAM

I'm saying... Maybe this isn't one we can win. Maybe we should just take the deal.

8x23 Sacrifice

9x07 Bad Boys

SAM You just got lucky?

DEAN nods.

SAM (continues) Kind of like you did with this place. I mean, here I was thinking this was the worst part of your life, and it turns out it was the best. Why'd you ever leave?

DEAN Never felt right.

SAM Really?

SAM Dean ... Thank you.

DEAN For what?

SAM For always being there, for – having my back. Look, I know it always hasn't been easy …

10x07 Girls Girls Girls

SAM

What you said earlier, back there, about being past saving -- were you really --

10x23 Brother’s Keeper

DEAN

And I was wrong. You were right, Sam. You knew that this world would be better without us in it.

SAM

No, no, no, wait a second. You're twisting my words here, Dean.

[Sam reaches into his jacket and holds some photos in his hand]

SAM

Take these. And one day, when you find your way back... Let these be your guide. And they can help you remember what it was to be good...what it was to love.

[Sam looks down and places the two pictures we saw in the opening on the floor. One of Mary Winchester and Dean as a young boy and another of Mary, Dean and Sam as an infant. Sam looks back up at Dean and Dean hesitates, looking conflicted. Death is standing behind Dean]

11x02 Form and Void

Dean deserves a life.”

11x05 Thin Lizzie

11x23 Alpha and Omega

SAM:

Dean, you know, you don't have to do this.

12x22 Who We Are

SAM

Promise.

13x23 Let the Good Times Roll

SAM

Kill me.

JACK

What? ‭

SAM

Kill me.‬‬‬‬

You can stop him, Jack. You can get your power back.

JACK

No, I-I c-can't.

‭‬‬‬SAM

What?‬

JACK

I know you can.

14x01 Stranger in a Strange Land

SAM

Cas, I -- No, I-I-I don't blame you. I... Honestly, I-I wish I'd have thought of it first. If it meant finding Dean, I-I'd work with --

14x12 Prophet and Loss

SAM You have one card today! But we’ll find another tomorrow. But if you quit on us today, there will be no tomorrow! You tell me, uh, you don’t know what else to do. I don’t either, Dean. Not yet. But what you’re doing now, i-it’s – it’s wrong! It’s quitting! I mean, l-look what just happened. Donatello never quit fighting. So we could help him because he never gave up.

14x20 Moriah

SAM

I'm the one who brought him back, and I brought him back because he's family. And then he came back, and he burned his soul off to save us... you and me. And now what? You... Now you... you want my permission? You want me to say I'm cool with losing him and losing you all at once? 'Cause I can't do that. I won't say that, 'cause I...

15x20: Carry On (I am so mad I am so mad I am SO mad that I even had to go to this transcript but this is important to include)

SAM

Yeah.

Um... alright.

I'll call for help. I'll get the first-aid kit.

***I’m sure there are more examples than this, but none of this tracks with what was said in the article. THIS is the show I watched.

Honestly, the only Sam That Would Have Agreed With What Was Said is this one -

#I will take him in the pan #destiel #hellerism #spn #supernatural #spn fandom #deancas #not my sam winchester #spn family #spn analysis #spn recaps #spn summary #sam would want dean to stay alive

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bisexualoftheblade-old · 4 years ago

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how many wips do you have? like what are they all, and not the number of wips in a fandom? what are all the names?

okay. fuck you. fuck you so much. fuck you.

i’m putting this under a read more cut no one else deserves to see this shit. a lot of these are requests, and for those i will just write out the request itself

Shadowhunters:

domestic polycule fluff with tem, jessa, and will because im not a coward

Supernatural

- hehe hoho i request destiel hehehe

- request 61/? cai cai cai cai i need you to rewrite the destiel scene but yk. GOOD. not like i'm in the know about the spn fandom or anything, it's been years for me. but DO IT

Bright Sessions

- caleb/adam grisha AU

- mark bryant vs. united states aka sue the AM

- caleb/adam college fluff

Umbrella Acaademy

- request 31/? i want a ben and klaus drabble please spare me some brotherly bickering

- AND SO BEGINS NIGHT 4 with request 13/? oooh oooh can i get a raymond and allison playlist??? i think their vibes together would SLAP

- hi there night 2 is technically morning 3 but who's counting not me anyway request 5/? can i get a ben moodboard? gotta rep my tua bb

Percy Jackson

- request 9/? can i get a percabeth moodboard or quote edit?? like god they're the og couple goals take me back to high school cai

- For the 100 follower things :D Jercy getting caught in the rain

- request 29/? a drabble about literally anything to do with pjo. i’ll be happy with anyone and anything i’m love these children

- *somersaults in like I’m a real fancy acrobat* hello ello ello may I request some camp half blood chaos possible involving *does a flip* ✨side characters✨ <3

Penumbra Podcast

- request 52/? drabble about the penumbra podcast. this is for ren bc ren likes it and i don't actually know anything about it. juno? i think? that's the one ren likes. write it for ren

- Tpp ghost hunting / buzzfeed unsolved au

- sad juno smut

- final resting place fic go brrrr

Marvel

- request 6/? i'm going to my roots y'all can i get a spider-man playlist? if not a playlist then i'd honestly be happy with literally anything involving spider-man

- request 15/? i'm going crazy this is recorded evidence of me actually losing it ANYWAY can i get a quote edit for something from iron man? literally anything that man says is gold so cai's choice :D he deserved better in endgame i'm still bitter

- request 42/? do another spidey thing that differs from the other spidey thing

- request 73/? you have Opinions. rant about infinity way and/or endgame. go.

- request 74/? quote edit for deadpool!!

- spideytorch relationship character study

- peter parker as a tired grad student monitoring the young avengers (send help)

Six of Crows

- okay listen i wasn't going to request anything bc i worry about you but also? if you want to/have the time hit me with a playlist for our girl nina zenik

- request 43/? fuckin give me the ending anya should have had. she is alive and with her new son and having a great time

- request 45/? inej moodboard?

- request 47/? will you make literally any meme of your choosing for six of crows?

- request 48/? write a drabble for kaz, my favorite bastard

- okay so i don't actually like nina or mattias that much but i still wanna hear about your thoughts (and also see if you'll change my mind)

- kaz brekker turning 18 fic. birthday party, everyone singing, whole shebang. i need it stat

- religious trauma fic aka i started shipping kaz/alina/inej and i can’t stop

- kaz trauma soup (he has D.I.D. and you can’t prove me wrong)

- my two redacted fics for @grishaversebigbang

- wesper fake dating

- six of crows bright sessions crossover: everyone gets therapy

TMA

- uhh... s1 gang having a nice time? melanie getting to have some Pride™️? some "fun" horror thing?

- request 7/? spare steph and jason bonding? please sir? spare some for a humble child such as myself?

- okay so this was meant for night 3 but i had midterm shit SO this is honorary night 3 let's DO THIS request 8/? i want a moodboard of extremely out of context magnus archives shit like i mean confuse the FUCK out of me i don't go here i know Nothing about it

- request 11/? OKAY so i need tim stoker meeting tim drake now i need my timmy to meet your tim plus i want to see character differences no i'm not trying to create a tim stoker in my head so i can read a's fic while NOT thinking of tim drake whaaaaaat you're crazy

- request 18(i think)/? i need a quote edit of every time within the first like. 15 eps of tam where jon is like “sounds fake but go off” thank u bb

- request 40/? i challenge you to write a tma drabble based only on the episodes i've heard. i'm currently halfway through episode 23

- Jon being lovingly bullied into taking a break. I'm aware this has been written a million times but it is one of my favorite things.

- spiral!sasha AU

- extinction martin go brrrrr

- high school era timsasha. they've both been friends for years, and everyone always asks when they will be a couple. they decide to fake date, to prove everyone wrong and show what a bad couple they would be. turns out that's a bit trickier than they thought

- after sasha comes back, tim is broken. he can't let go, scared that if he looks away for even a minute he'll lose her again. sasha suggests shibari as a way for him to give up control

- sasha pov mag 19 au, sacrificing herself to save the others, knows that if she gives herself up to the not!them it will let the others live

- this is the "tim finds a polaroid of sasha" trope

- early archives days,, long nights in research,,, clothes sharing,, somft. late nights and falling asleep at their desks warm and safe in the other's presence

- two parts: timsasha as kids, each picking a constellation that is "theirs". just soft kid antics. tim at sasha's grave glancing up to see their constellations

- continuing your job’s a joke (you’re broke)

DC Comics

- TIMSTEPH HADESTOWN AU,,,

- my redacted fic for @batfam-big-bang

- request for you to get a decent amount of sleep? serious answer, dickkori, SAL's Venus

- request 4/? timsteph morning after 👀 mayhaps?

- a concept: nonbinary stephanie brown

- teehee hi mom, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, but can i request damian angst for your accomplishments 100 followers?

- hi you can ignore my first request if you want, or you can ignore this one. but bls possibly write some bikini ra’s? -the bikini bitch

- request 27/? jay is asking through me for a jondami playlist but tbh i also want it so win win yk?

- "I don't know how to help you but I can help you find someone who does" with bruce and jason? im just craving bruce being a good day to jason for once

- “I am putting you in time out because you need to understand the consequences of your actions.” with steph and jason as dumbass disaster bi best friends pretty please?

- request 32/? timsteph patrol date!!!

- request 33/? timsteph *gala* date? mayhaps??

- request 37/? tim drake drabble but make it Edgy cai

- request 39/? drabble of a prank war between tim and damian

- joyfire cuddly fluff please? or like just any outlaw fluff if joyfire isnt your thing (feel free to add every member of the outlaws, dont feel like u gotta stick with jason, kori, roy i love them all)

- barbara and robin! jason fluff? bonding over books or something?

- request 62/? i need a drabble about the chaotic trio jason, tim, and steph i'm love them ty

- request 63/? batfam x mcu crossover. batfam meets ironfam. give me ALL the cliches. ALL OF THEM

- request 64/? young justice x young avengers - jay cuz idk SHIT about the young avengers

- request 66/? jondami moodboard pls and ty

- request 67/? timsteph moodboard!!!!!!

- request 69/? HEHEHE kinky 😏 i would v much like a timsteph drabble of the almost first time. does that make sense? like i don't want you to go all the way NSFW cuz i know that's against the rules and i'm a rule follower. but like they *almost* go all the way. this could be fade to black or some shit i don't care just make it a lil steamy and have Fun

- i request damian angst! all of it

- hmm... maybe i request? jondami?

- mayhaps,,,,some batfam,,,,,committing crimes? ily be gay do crime <3 - lu

- How about a ficlet with Steph and Cass?

Found Family Bingo Prompts

- no powers au

- tunnel

- first day

- join the club

- hurt/comfort

- experiment

- playing favorites

- hold on

- possession

- 10 o’clock

- singing

- road

- snitch

- curfew

- timer

- fantasy au

- zombie au

- dreams

- campfire

- are you okay

- movie night

- games

- scared

Miscellaneous

- a request: Write A Drabble, Coward

- is it too late to request a moodboard for me?

- request 20/? i’m going off book because i’m in a Chaotic Mood™️ can you just absolutely vibe check me like go off cai demolish me

- request 21/? i formally request that you pick a favorite cai. i don’t care what that favorite pertains to, just pick a favorite something

- request 23/? roast me

- request 24/? can i have a buzzfeed unsolved spoopy playlist but spoiler alert it’s not spoopy bc shane doesn’t believe does this make sense it has been a Day™️

- request 25/50 i want a jake and amy fic make it Soft cai i’m love them b99 is so good

- request 28/? i know nothing about the lord of the rings so make something that will confuse the shit out of me

- request 34/? malvie and jaylos moodboards 😈

- request 35/? a moodboard for the bbb mods!! perceive all of us!!!

- request 36/? moodboard for the tua mods too???? mayhaps??

- request 41/? doctor WHO? idk but i want a drabble of him and the one character i know from doctor who which is rose

- request 46/? make an alignment meme with our group, have fun!!!

- request 49/? i want you to kin assign me a character from every fandom you can/want to. go feral

- request 50!!!!/? this is a special request. the most special request. can you make a bastards tbh playlist? i want our vibes encapsulated. i want us in music form. i want to hear those songs and be like "that's me and cai" and smile.

- requests 51/? i know jack shit about good omens. explain it to me in the most confusing way possible. make me know less by the end than i know now

- request 53/? can you write a mel aesthetic? i'm Curious

- request 54/? give me a list of book recs cai i want some good book recs pls

- request 56/? edit a picture of US together too

- request 58/? oooh can i have a disney edit? like. hm. i just really love disney and i want anything to do with disney. like a quote or an aesthetic or an aesthetic edit i just want disney.

- request 59/? i would v much like a recipe for carbonara. i've never had it but it sounds fucking delicious

- request 60/? ooh hey can i get a makeup tutorial? i know you like makeup, i'm shit at doing makeup. teach me

- request 65/? i need the most emo playlist you can make that vibes with dear evan hansen thank you

- request 68/? i want a superwholock moodboard. this can be serious, with the actual fandoms in mind, or literally what the era felt like. the insanity. the horror.

- request 70/? ooh ooh ooh do you have a good bread recipe?? i wanna get that bread

- request 71/? i want a playlist with the vibes of summoning a demon. please don't ask questions. i don't have answers. and if i do, no i don't.

- For the requests, how about writing something based on a friend?

- request 75/? MMMM i want literally anything to do with natasha, pierre, and the great comet of 1812

- request 76/? i want some healthy recipes. help a girl out

- a feral bbb quote or two?

- you perceive my plant but now I dare thee to perceive mine own visage

- okay this is a two for one request. 1. you did the bee movie script so now we need a shrek two script edit 2. sleep please

- Pansexual mb for my lil queer soul?

- my (probably) final request is just for you to ramble about something, i don't really care what

- HI ILY CONGRATS AS WELL CAUSE IM LATE BUT CONGRATS. could i request a pirates of the caribbean (or just pirates) or whatever you what to do, free range.

- mood board for the beluga whales who got brought to the animal sanctuary in Iceland please?

- 100 follower request: Moodboard for my stuffed cow Oaky?

#cai's 200 #asks #mininacl

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fursasaida · 4 years ago

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Would love to hear about all of the ways ppl misunderstand HG (if you feel like it)

i’m doing this as bullets bc i don’t have the oomph to like write it out properly

they think the socioeconomic specialization of the 12(+1) districts is the typical thing of like, “i will construct a wholly implausible society that’s about putting people in totalitarian versions of thinly disguised hogwarts houses so i can show how my heroine is Special and Unique” instead of like, a specifically elaborated form of oppression by the capitol that shows how aestheticized the political economy is. it’s not that most people in panem really believe everyone from District 4 (? IIRC) is suited as a person to fishing, or whatever. it’s that the capitol said “you produce this and only this for us, how much we value that commodity category determines your value, and that is all you are” and this is completely interwoven with the spectacle of control that is the Games. (the Games are basically a dramatization of territorial control but wah wah wah “battle royale ripoff” wah wah shut up.) it’s actually a very interesting political economy concept which i could go on about at length but i value my life

due to the above they think Katniss is supposed to go on the usual character arc of Doesn’t Fit In --> Discontent --> Dismantle the System and Be Happy

this causes them to complain both that she doesn’t change enough (first of all, she does change, just not in the way they expect; and second, the ways she doesn’t change are part of the POINT! this isn’t a story of personal transformation! it’s about political change!) and that she’s too like sad or limp or whatever later on. IT’S A VERY GOOD DEPICTION OF TRAUMA, SHUT UP.

they complain that the ending is “unsatisfying.”

of course the ending is “unsatisfying,” because the political change that occurred is incomplete and nuanced, and also, she still has all that trauma, there is a cost, the whole thematic backbone of the series is “internalize the externalities/make the invisible costs visible.” it’s the interplay between the hypervisibility of spectacle and the extraction of people’s time, bodies, wealth, relationships--their lives--that it both relies on and hides.

relatedly, people think katniss shooting whatsername at the end is some kind of unjustified twist. i don’t know what to say about this. i throw up my hands. WERE YOU PAYING ATTENTION AT ALL.

does anyone think about what the story is actually about? they do not. ("no one” is an exaggeration, i just mean the people i’m mad at)

the love triangle. oh my god. again people just take this as a “typical YA” thing of like, let me show how desirable and special my heroine is by having both the boys want her!! it is not that at all. Gale and Peeta stand in for different sides of her personality and respectively bring those sides out in her. her being torn between them is in fact where the “personal change” aspect of the story happens.

both of them are very strategic thinkers but in entirely different registers, and they value different things. she has much more in common with Gale at the beginning (on the surface), and her choice to see the value in Peeta’s way of thinking and do the very hard work of developing those capacities and responses in herself is her choice about who she wants to be and whether she values a reversal of power (Gale) or actually improving society (Peeta). whether being a ~rebellious hunter~ or being a caretaker (the reason, remember, she did the illegal hunting in the first place!) is more important to her.

they are both from her home district and people she’d known before the games because, again, these are qualities/tendencies she already possessed; choosing which to turn toward and develop in herself is the personal aspect of the political story.

and it is not a coincidence that it’s after the total dissociation and alienation she experiences in being made an aesthetic spectacle qua ~rebel by District 13 that she does the incredibly difficult, steadfast, further-traumatizing work of helping bring Peeta back to himself and so to her. the ending doesn’t happen without her whole process of negotiating her relationships with those two characters.

but these people don’t understand the ending anyway so i don’t know what i was expecting

this is called good writing and it’s an extremely valid way to develop and use supporting characters

god i could scream

Suzanne Collins’ origin story for this series, about channel-flipping between reality TV and coverage of the Iraq War, really just puts it all out there for you and these people ignore this! if they even know about it they just take it as like, “what if i put this thing on this other thing.” but she is getting at something very real with that! she is saying that both war and entertainment are spectacle-generating machines, fueled by inequality and the bodies of young people, that maintain power structures. (the big thing THG is really missing here is how this works internationally because there just aren’t any other countries in its world.)

[redacted: extremely over the top musing about race and class intersections in re: the unequal distribution of exposure to premature death and how intentional Collins was or wasn’t in getting what she got right right and what she got wrong wrong]

a few years back i was watching The Voice (leave me alone) and they had this whole ~storyline about a girl (i think 19 tops?) from a tiny, tiny rural Southern town, who was too stage-fright-y to perform to her potential. every week the judges would tell her she disappointed and every week her coach would save her because, he kept saying, he still had faith she could deliver. (she was fine but they had a Narrative to construct.) and then one week magically they changed up her makeup and clothes to make her much more overtly sexy, but in this like fucked-up babydoll innocent way, and lo and behold she discovered her confidence and wowed everyone. who could have predicted!!

I remember another contestant on The Voice who was literally there to try to get to a point where he would be able to get his family back into housing after flooding destroyed their home in i can’t even remember which (socio)natural disaster.

like that is just literally how the hunger games work. the promise is that this is a rare route to economic mobility. it requires a dramatic makeover, patronage, all of it. the makeover involves being essentialized as a citizen-type, a national subject that fits into a particular box (rural/urban, gendered, raced, etc--all of them are just entertaining backstories and narrative handles for the audience). this is a violent process, however visual and symbolic it may be via reality TV. it remains a process on which your odds as a contestant depend completely. and of course no one has heard from either of these people i mentioned since, because there can only be one winner; and even if you win, you can still lose the game of being a winner. no one asks what happens to them when it’s over, much like many people don’t really think about military veterans. if you think about the post-games life of the winners in THG, they are literally what you get if you imagine a military veteran and a D-list celebrity being the same person. reality TV already IS a gladiators’ arena where people ARE fighting for their lives. the violence is just sublimated. like i said. internalize and visibilize the costs.

(there is something here too, in the overlap of spectacle, about how the contemporary US treats its soldiers more as signifiers, high priests of civic nationalism, and/or sin-eaters than as people. similarly reality TV contestants come to stand for certain archetypes of the nation.)

#anonymous #2 #3 #4 #5 #books #YA #SFF #the hunger games

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lovenona · 4 years ago

Note

ship your moots? (´,,•ω•,,)♡

ok king here we go

@suedebunn; rengoku. i am adamant in this. bunny girl lyn with big kind-hearted flame boy? it is a match made in heaven. u deserve to be happy

@two-percent-milk; nanami. how does it feel to be god’s favorite? u deserve a man who will take care of u but also dismantle capitalism with his bare hands

@kmorgzz; kuroo. no i am not just saying this because i’m an astrological kuroo kinnie. u need a man who will have some crazy [redacted] with u but also knows when to be kind and serious <3

@alto-march-of-death; ushijima. i know akaashi is ur soulmate but there is something about wakatoshal that cannot be expressed in human language. u guys have a cat, for god’s sake

@cryptidkatts; sakusa. kattoomi supremacy now and forever. u deserve old money sakusa who buys u art supplies and also [redacted for content.] kattoomi is written in the stars. kattoomi is canon. goodnight

@keishinslove; ukai. hot e-girl and sexy possibly mafia daddy. i’m literally crying thinking abt this i don’t think I need to elaborate any further ur honor

@waitforitillwritemywayout; sakusa. u deserve to be happy, darling. u would both be so funny and chill and i think i would be so intimidated by ur super cool and suave presence. please get married

@introloves; bokuto. is this a surprise??? jax has the sweetest, bubbliest personality and absolutely deserves a man with big tiddies and even bigger thighs to love and cherish her

@osamwu; mattsun. ever since i have met u i have learned that kitty and mattsun r the cutest little couple in the universe. i wish this happy couple all the best <3

@spikesbimbo; spike. girl u absolutely deserve to have a super hot dilf [redacted] u on his spaceship. also both of u are super hot and would literally be the coolest couple in outer space

@pinkoushi; yachi. i think u deserve someone to call a good girl and eat her [redacted] whenever u want. i also think u both would be so cute because ur both really soft and sweet and caring. how does it feel to win?

@ryoskuna; sukuna. i'm giving u the king. his tsundere facade with ur humor and big intelligent brain are a match for the ages. ur hades and persephone incarnate. godspeed and i wish u the best with his two massive [redacted]

– i'm sorry if i missed anyone, my brain short circuited and forgot every person i've ever met; i love all my moots dearly and validate every self-ship in existence <3

#I hope y'all enjoy #also if I forgot u I'm sorry #my brain is the size of a pea #letters to adele

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bestworstcase · 3 years ago

Note

The repressed feelings was REAL this chapter but I loved it! You played it out so well but damn this chapter hurts on a whole new level. You gave us such cute bonding moments within the group but I knew it wouldn’t last smh, you just love to torture us don’t you? And omg PLS GIVE CASS A BREAK! She even acknowledged she was tired and I was like maybe she’ll just be left alone to breathe ditzyistix iwasdeadwrong. This chapter was harassing my girl oh my God my angel just wanted a day to breathe and you gave her the exact opposite. Never a dull moment for Cass no siree she wanted to have fun and relax but was given repressed feelings back to bite her in the ass and decaying demon paying a visit and probably attempting to corrupt her again. The chapter started off so happy but the ending was so fucking devastating like this one was the worst I’ve seen of a complete 180 💀 but I do enjoying some good old tormenting before we get to the good stuff and was loving all the Zhan Tiri with the Scions lore and finding Sorchā’s Epiphanies! All in all loved the bonding in the beginning, was absolutely enthralled with the imagery given in the book and of the Zhan Tiri encounter ofc, and I loved how in tandem Cassandra’s childhood was in being trans and Saporian so basically always feeling like an outsider and developing horrible negative repressed feelings towards herself that affect her even in the present! And loved seeing her bond in her past with someone like her! The outcome was crushing but I’m glad she at least had that person in her life before.

kskfjdjg the alternate title for 14 is Being The Protagonist Sucks, Actually,

it’s okay though in 15 she gets to nap and make a new friend and in 16 [spoilers redacted] so like, who’s winning now. cassandra that’s who. definitely not zhan tiri because of zhan tiri were winning she’d be getting scritched behind the ears rn but, alas, cassandra isn’t ready for that yet.

this one is not the only chapter that will turn on a dime in tone but it is probably the gut punchiest one and i will confess to giggling to myself while writing the opening scene because i knew the complete and utter unraveling of cassandra’s nice day would just. wallop people. high highs / low lows and all that.

#the tonal shifts of 15 are also a lot #cass -> rapunzel -> cass -> moira

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infinitefandomimagines · 5 years ago

Text

I Can’t Lose You - Poe Dameron x Reader

WARNINGS: RISE OF SKYWALKER SPOILERS, MENTIONS OF DEATH, MENTIONS OF TORTURE, ANGST, BLOOD, YELLING

REQUEST: @lookinsidemyhead could I maybe ask for a Star Wars imagine? Like a poexfem!reader Maybe like instead of chewie being captured it was the reader and when they rescue her she’s a little out it from the torture in the interrogation room. angst with happy ending bc they escape

A poe dameron tros x reader where reader gets captured with chewy and poe rescues her, lots of angsty poe after losing reader because he thinks she's dead, then fluff when they reunite

The only thing that could pull the team's stunned gazes from the fiery explosion of the First Order ship was Poe's horrifying scream. The way your name ripped through his throat made Finn's heart stop and his blood run cold.

Poe took no caution in his efforts to make his way down from the rocky structure their getaway ship stood perched on, slipping and nearly falling more than once.

His heels kicked up sand as he sprinted towards the wrecked ship and Rey, who still stood frozen as the realization of what she'd just done dawned on her. Finn had to stop Poe from running straight to her, he'd never hurt Rey, but after what just happened he definitely wasn't thinking straight.

Finn wrapped his arms around his friend, holding him back and restricting his movement as he struggled to get free.

"What did you do?" Poe yelled at Rey, the high pitched crack in his voice was enough to send daggers through anyone listening's heart. Poe never stopped struggling to break free from Finn's grasp, and it was getting to the point where he just might succeed.

"Chewie I need some help down here!" Finn called up to the Wookie. There was no way he could get Poe to the ship himself, not when he was like this.

"Poe we need to go!" Finn yelled as he tried to pull Poe towards the ship, knowing if they stayed any longer your life wouldn't be the only fatality.

"No! No, I can't leave her!"

"She's gone, Poe. There's nothing we can-"

Finn stopped short as Poe finally broke free from his grasp. However, he didn't get very far, Chewie had made it down just in time to grab him.

"Chewie!" Finn yelled out, "Get him to the ship we need to get out of here! Rey come on!" Poe tried to fight his way out again, but the Wookie was too strong, forcibly pulling him back to the ship. He didn't stop fighting until Chewie released him once the ship had taken off with everyone safely inside.

There was a heavy tension in the air, nobody knew what to say. It's like they were just waiting for Poe to lash out like he usually did when he was upset, but he didn't. The burst of yelling and cursing the team was anxiously waiting for never came. Instead, he simply collapsed onto a storage box and with his head in his hands, he sobbed.

Finn watched his best friend, one who usually stood so strong and fiery, completely fall apart. Rey's heart ached in a way she didn't know it could, the thought that she'd caused this haunting her mind.

BB-8 slowly rolled over to Poe, letting out a series of confused beeps. "She's gone, buddy," Poe said in a broken voice. The small droid let out a high pitched whine mixed with sad beeps.

"This can't be for nothing," Finn finally spoke up, his voice soft as he struggled to speak through his own tears. "We can't let her die for nothing."

"She had the dagger with her, and without that. . ." Rey's voice was grim.

"So true, the inscription lives only in my memory now," C-3PO spoke up. All heads turned towards the droid. "Hang on, the inscription from the dagger is in your memory?" Finn asked.

"Yes master Finn, but the translation from a forbidden language cannot be retrieved, that is short of a complete redactive memory bypass. It is an extremely dangerous procedure usually performed by criminals."

"Alright, how do we do that?" Finn asked as if there was no question as to what the next step was.

"I know a black market droidsmith," Poe finally spoke up, his eyes glazed over and red. "He's on Kijimi." Poe didn't like the idea of going to Kijimi, but he didn't like the idea of you dying for nothing more.

"For Y/N," Finn said, giving Poe's shoulder a squeeze. "Yeah, for Y/N," Poe repeated, the sound of your name leaving a sad and bitter taste in his mouth.

Kijimi went just about how Poe thought it would. They had a rocky start, but in the end, they were able to retrieve the inscription from C-3PO's memory.

The droid's eyes glowed an ominous red as it recited the location to the Wayfinder.

"The Endor system? Where the last war ended?" Finn asked. No one had the opportunity to answer him as the entire building started shaking. Everyone shared concerned looks, but it was Rey who was the first to run outside to see what was causing the commotion.

"Ren's destroyer," she announced, looking up at the large, menacing ship. "He's here?" Finn asked, looking up at her. But Rey didn't answer, it seemed as though her entire body had gone stiff. "Y/N. . ." She spoke softly, but loud enough for Finn and Poe to hear.

"What about her?" Poe asked bitterly, your name sending a dagger through his heart.

"She's alive, she's on that ship," Rey turned around to face her friends.

"What?" Poe whispered, his voice cracking slightly. Tears stung the back of his eyes, but this time the tears weren't ones of sorrow. He felt a small glimmer of hope bubble up inside of him. He no longer slouched, his back straightening up and shoulders rolling back, Rey's words bringing a new light to his eyes.

"How is that possible?" Finn questioned.

"She must have been on a different transport," Rey spoke, her words still laced with disbelief.

"We have to go get her," Poe said eagerly, grabbing his things and looking around at the group. Everyone nodded in agreement, all except C-3PO, who sat confused, his only thought being to introduce himself.

"Yeah, that's gonna be a problem," Poe muttered, a little annoyed at their situation, but not even C-3PO's lost memory could damage his spirits. His head already fantasizing about seeing you again, creating multiple scenarios in his head.

Once everyone was ready, they rushed from Zorii's hideout, the girl following them just to be sure they made it to their ship.

"Thank you," Poe rushed out to Zorii once they'd reached their ship. He didn't plan on waiting for a response, but a grip on his forearm stopped him dead in his tracks. "Poe-" Zorii spoke up, only to be cut short.

"I'm sorry, I have to go, but you can come with us," He offered. Though his feelings for his past relationship were gone, he still cared about Zorii as a friend and leaving her behind just felt wrong. But Zorii shook her head, "I can't," she answered sadly, "But take this, it'll grant you passage to Ren's ship."

Poe stared at the shiny medallion, "I can't, it's yours-"

"Anyone two eyes and half a brain can see how much you care about this girl, it's worth more to you than it is to me."

Poe paused before lifting his hands and gently taking the medallion from Zorii, "Thank you," he breathed out, wrapping Zorii in a tight embrace. "You have no idea how much this means to me."

Zorii chuckled a bit as she returned the hug before lightly pushing Poe towards his ship, "Now go, save your girl and win the war."

Poe nodded, mumbling one more 'thank you' before boarding the ship with the others.

Getting inside Ren's destroyer had been easier than anticipated, especially with the held of the medallion. However, searching the maze of a ship deemed a difficult task. It seemed as though with each hall they turned down there were more and more stormtroopers.

The next corner they turned no one had their blasters at the ready. Rey quickly jumped in front of Finn and Poe, waving her hand in front of the stormtroopers, "It is okay that we are here," she rushed out.

"It is okay that you're here," one of the troopers repeated.

"You're relieved that we're here."

"Oh thank God you're here," The trooper's shoulders relaxed and he lowered his blaster to his side, as did the other.

"Does she do that to us?" Poe asked, a little confused as to what exactly just happened. Rey just ignored him, instead, she asked the troopers for where you were being held, which they gladly provided.

It was a mad dash to the room you were in, the name of the room being "Interrogation room #6" worrying him.

At some point, Rey ran off on her own, but when Finn tried to follow her Poe gripped his arm, "We need to find Y/N, Rey can handle herself." Chewie howled in agreement with Poe, and Finn knew better than to argue with his friends.

It didn't take long to reach the room you were being held in and even less to shoot the lock on the door and bust in. Poe winced as he entered the familiar room, the dark lighting and metal chair-like structure sending painful memories of his time spent being tortured by Kylo Ren. He didn't even want to imagine what you must have been through, though sadly he could.

Poe quickly shook all thoughts that plagued his mind, you were the only thing that mattered right now. Nothing else. He approached the chair slowly, scared that what he finds might not be what he hoped for.

His heart sank when he saw your unconscious form strapped down to the chair by restraints. A bruise had already formed on the left side of your face, just over your cheekbone. There was a bloody cut that stretched across your right temple which was beginning to form its own bruise, and a trail of blood trickled down and dripped onto your shirt from your nose. Your chest moved up and down slowly as you took in shallow breaths. Poe didn't even want to imagine what the parts of you he couldn't see looked like.

Poe gently placed his shaking hands on either side of your cheeks, cupping your face. The pad of his thumb lightly brushed over you bruise, examining it. "Y/N," he spoke softly, "Y/N, baby please wake up."

Your entire body suddenly tensed up as your struggled against your restraints, prompting Poe to quickly pull his hands away from you, terrified he hurt you.

"No, please. . ." You mumbled, not fully awake, your eyes screwed shut. "Please. . . Don't."

"We need to get her out of these restraints," Poe instructed, trying his best to hide the panic in his voice. Chewie let out a wail, pressing a red button on the wall adjacent to the chair. There was a hissing sound followed by a click as your restraints popped open.

You blinked your eyes a bit at the noise and sudden release of pressure on your wrists and ankles. A familiar face came into view as you blinked away the hazy glaze from your eyes.

"Poe?" You whispered, not quite sure if Kylo Ren was playing tricks on your mind again or not.

"It's me, baby, you're okay." He said, helping you out of the metal chair and pulling you into his arms. One arm wrapped around your waist as the other held the back of your head, your cheeks resting against his chest. You winced as he accidentally pressed against your bruised ribcage, but in all honesty, you didn't care. You were just relieved to be back in his arms, and Poe was more than happy to have you there.

"I'm so sorry," he mumbled into your hair, "I shouldn't have let you go out there alone."

"It's not your fault, you couldn't have known."

"Guys I really hate to break up the moment, but we gotta go!" Finn rushed out, earning a bellow of agreement from Chewie.

"Yeah. Yeah, okay," Poe said, pulling away from the embrace. "Can you walk?"

You nodded, however as soon as you took the first step forward your head started spinning and your vision blurred. You quickly reached out and gripped Poe's arm to stop yourself from losing balance. Poe instinctively caught you, holding up the majority of your weight.

"Chewie!" Poe called out, gesturing to you. The Wookie swiftly placed your arm around his waist, and wrapped a furry arm around your back and under your arm, holding you up.

Poe and Finn walked ahead of you, blasters at the ready, inspecting each hallway for hostiles. You limped behind them, Chewie helping you walk by holding you upright.

And after Poe being shot, all four of you nearly being executed, only to be saved by an unlikely ally, you made it to the Millennium Falcon.

Chewie gently set you down on the small cot in Poe's quarters while Finn rushed to the cockpit, trying his best to remember everything Poe had taught him about flying. Chewie soon joined him, helping him get the Falcon in the air so they could go find Rey.

Poe stayed with you in his quarters, sorting through a med pack to find supplies to bandage and clean your wounds. A soft groan escaped your throat as the ship took a sharp turn, harshly shaking the cot you were laying on, sending a wave of pain through your body.

Poe wet a cloth and started dabbing at the dried blood on your temple. You let out a hiss as the sudden contact stung. Poe slipped his free hand into yours, attempting to provide any form of comfort he could.

"What did they do to you?" Poe asked as he moved to clean the blood from under your nose. The question wasn't directed towards you, more of Poe just thinking out loud. However, his question still sent a chill up your spine as you began to replay the horrible things Kylo Ren and his minions did to get information out of you. You were able to refrain from giving them anything up until Kylo Ren used the force to crawl around in your mind. The pain was indescribable.

"Hey, it's okay," Poe comforted, stopping what he was doing. He'd noticed the grimace on your face and how you tensed up when he brought up his question. "You're safe, he can't hurt you."

You nodded weakly, waiting for the horrible thoughts to pass as Poe got back to work.

Poe worked quickly to clean and bandage your wounds, finishing up a matter of minutes. While he packed up the medical kit, you attempted to sit up, but the action proved to be a bit more painful than you anticipated. You inhaled sharply as a sharp pain exploded from your side, your hand instinctively flew to your bruised ribcage, holding it as if that would help the pain subside.

"Here, let me help," Poe said softly when he noticed your struggle. He placed a hand on your back and the other lightly grabbed your arm as he pulled you to a sitting position on the edge of the bed. Your hand still clutched your side as you squeezed your eyes shut, waiting for the pain to dissipate.

The bed sank beside you as Poe took a seat beside you, his hand rubbing comforting circle in your back. You leaned into him, resting your forehead on his shoulder.

"Do you want something for the pain," he asked, there was a bit of tension in his voice as he tried to hold back tears, he hated seeing you in so much pain. "No, it'll pass. I'm fine." And eventually, it did, leaving you relieved and a bit more cautious about how you moved.

You lifted your head from Poe's shoulder, your eyes meeting his. A soft smile graced his lips and his hand moved from your back to your neck, his thumb resting on your jaw. "I thought I'd lost you," he said in a shaky voice, tears threatening to spill. "And it made me realize you're the one thing I can't live without."

You wrapped your fingers around Poe's arm, just below his wrist, rubbing small circles in the back of his hand with the pad of your thumb.

"I can't lose you," his voice cracked as his eyes glazed over with tears.

"You won't, I promise," you confirmed.

Poe pulled you into him, gently pressing his lips to yours. His hand slid down from your neck to your waist, his other hand finding it's way to your hip. He pulled you into his lap, breaking the kiss to fully envelop you in a hug, careful not to touch your bruised side. One arm kept hold of your waist while the other crossed your back, his hand placed on your shoulder. Poe rested his head in the crook of your neck, holding you close.

You rested a hand on his back while the other held the back of his head. You lightly ran your fingers through his messy curls.

You let out a sigh of content, finally feeling at ease being in Poe's arms. "I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere."

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@gracielou0518 @booklove103

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tracynotabi · 3 years ago

Text

Riptide Day 2 / Undertow

September 11, 2021

D-Day.

Kevin, Ivan, Joey, and I were getting a ride from Spencer, who was also taking Narq to the venue, while Robert and Parker got a ride from someone else. Well, at least we didn’t have to walk to the venue. I didn’t pack sunscreen.

At 9am, about half an hour we were supposed to leave, Kevin gets a stomachache.

Me: He just needs to poop. Spencer: The classic.

We end up going to the lobby to wait for Spencer in Narq, which was fine considering we actually didn’t want Spencer, our ride, waiting for us.

Spencer: Okay, Narq’s just using the bathroom rq lol Me: Is he also having tummy problems Spencer: Nah just bein stoner and forgetting to do stuff lol Me: The classic

We go get Chick-fil-A and I’m sitting underneath the dashboard again by Kevin’s feet. I think the employees were very bewildered, as the woman on the other side of the window did a double take. I would, too, if I saw a smaller-than-average person just hiding underneath the dashboard sipping on a cup of Coke.

Some time after I get to the venue during doubles, I end up talking to Jimmy (j u m), when Kevin comes rushing over to me, a panicked look on his face.

Forgot to mention, but Kevin actually couldn’t get all of his poop out before coming to the venue and now it is back with a vengeance.

He tells me that he’s unable to go to any restroom because there were three stalls in the men’s restroom: two were occupied and one was clogged with poop.

He had tried flushing the poop one but it only made it worse. It just clogged more and the water level rose. If he had sat down and insisted on finishing, his balls would be touching the water and that’s a no-no.

He tried asking the front desk for other restrooms, but he was informed it was the only one. He was desperate and you could just see it in his eyes that he was about to break.

Me, using the big, wrinkly brain that I had, told him to use the women’s restroom. He froze, not even realizing that that was an option.

Now before anyone complains, hear me out.

I would rather be in a restroom with a male in the stall next to me, than exit the restroom and see someone standing outside the men’s restroom trying to wait for a stall with a shit stain in his pants. Excuse the vulgarity, but it’s true.

If you’re ever at one of my tournaments and you need to go and no male restroom is unoccupied, for the love of god, please fucking use the women’s restroom. I do not need this mess on my hands and you best believe I’m shoving myself in the men’s restroom if I gotta fucking go expel unicorns and rainbows.

I go to the restroom with Kevin and stand awkardly on my phone to keep watch, because he didn’t want any of the staff members actually seeing him and risk himself getting kicked out of the venue.

That would’ve been extremely unfortunate.

Luckily, nobody else needed to go use the restroom while Kevin was in there and he was able to safely compete his duty (lol).

If anyone is upset at my suggestion, I’m sorry, but I wasn’t about to not provide such a simple solution for Kevin’s emergency.

Anyway, the tournament start shortly after that.

First match I pay attention to is Kevin vs. Wombat. In my head, I think it’s pools so I shouldn’t worry too much. I try to watch Kevin’s sets, but it makes me physically ill sometimes because my anxiety is wracked up like crazy and I just want to throw up. Many have witnessed me walking away and trying to distract myself multiple times at multiple different tournaments.

It’s like that gory horror movie that you can’t keep looking away from.

Besides knowing that I get sick, I figured it would be fine since I actually enjoy trying to support my boyfriend and watch him come out of pools winners’ side. Not meaning any disrespect by Wombat, by the way. He’s great. Just realistic. It’s like how I expect Kevin to lose to Bob.

Kevin loses Game 1.

Ooh my tummy’s doing barrel rolls like the way Twisty did with that pullout bed. I look away but I’m just so distracted by the crowd noises.

I totally get it, though. Obviously, it’s sick that Wombat’s holding his own against Kevin, who is seed 3 of the tournament. I’d be excited, too, if my friend was making an upset on someone else. But Kevin’s my boyfriend, so obviously, I want him to win.

Kevin barely wins Game 2 and I’m like ooooh boy. My tummy’s going to town and I think I gag a little by how sick I feel. Gotta focus on getting Joey his next match. *deep breaths*

When heartswaptv airs the whole tournament, definitely check out the set. It was really good (as far as I can hear, I couldn’t bring myself to watch the rest of it).

Kevin comes over to me after he’s out of pools and I scold him for making me worried.

AND YOU NOW WHAT HE SAYS?

Kevin: Babe, it’s fine - I almost lost to Zeddy at Redacted City and I got 2nd. I’ll be fine. Me: T____T *incoherent whining noises*

Does Kevin thinks he’s fucking cute for saying that or something? I was not amused.

Since I didn’t have to volunteer TO the entirety of the tournament, I bounced around mingling with other people.

At one point, I get a message from Suvir in our group chat about how he, Sosa, and Narq were planning on coming to visit NorCal. Of course, since Narq was already here, I decided to just go up to him and ask.

Me: So I heard you’re coming to NorCal? Narq: I am? Me: That’s what Suvir said. *shows phone* Narq: I guess I’m going to NorCal!

Suvir: Narq doesn’t actually know. Sosa just said he’d take him with him and said Narq would agree to go because he’s Narq. Me: Oh that makes sense why he had no idea what I was talking about.

It wasn’t until around top bracket did things start to pick up. Not too many spoilers, because (1) no spoilers before they upload the vod and (2) I have a terrible memory when it comes to the matches.

I remember holding up Kevin’s phone to stream to our Discord because we had some non-PM player friends who wanted to see and I think Kevin wanted Thomas (ThundeRzReiGN) to give him some advice throughout the tournament. Not actually coach, but to critique his play.

As more and more top players fell, Kevin made it a goal to do his best not to fall into the landmine that was Losers’. So many heavy hitters were large threats to him: Techboy, Malachi, Akimi, Cloudburst...

Not to say that Winners’ side didn’t have their fair share of monsters: Peter, Parker, Kumatora, Twisty, Nogh, Lunchables...

Kevin’s first match in Top 32 was against Bongo, who people sleep on quite a lot. For those of you that don’t know him, he’s a Captain Falcon from NY who actually beat Kevin at Flex Zone 3 in 2018. Kevin had beaten him at Encore, but it wasn’t easy.

Not to mention Falcon is a pain the butt for Mario. Unfortunately, the match was not recorded (as far as I know), and it was a very exciting match from what I heard. I avoided watching it because based on how long it took, I knew it had to have been a Game 5. During that time, two matches have been finished on “stream.”

Kevin had said his match against Bongo was the toughest one he had - not to discredit his other opponents, of course - but according to him, it was the scariest and closest. Also the threat of being put into Losers so early would’ve made the climb to Top 8 a lot harder.

His overall goal was actually to make Top 8. Despite being a third seed and rank 5, what I’ve noticed about Kevin is that he does have doubts about himself quite often. He’s never complacent in his opponents and worries all the time about being upset and I don’t think anyone puts more pressure on him more than himself.

As I watched my friends progress through bracket, all I can think is there’s not much I can do. I don’t understand the game very much, despite my heavy involvement in the scene. In fact, more often than not, I believe I understand the game the least compared to everyone else.

A tangent from the actual tournament itself is coming, but I think I should address why I’m even in this community:

While everyone loves the game, I love the community behind it. I find it worth it to sit/stand in one location for hours at a time because it allows my friends to enjoy the game they love comfortably without worrying how the tournament is progressing. They can focus on their own growth and passion.

I think what I see is completely different. Like I said, I don’t really understand this game - I can’t differentiate uairs, bairs, d-smashes, etc. I compute it in my head, but can’t visualize it. I don’t recognize most combos - in fact, more often than not, I’m sitting there just staring at the screen kind of blankly. Sometimes, it does make me wonder if I really am part of this community because I don’t really understand the game.

I can’t say I particularly care too much about the game, but I understand how much of an impact it’s made on me and for that, I’m very thankful for this game because it’s led me to some great people.

Back to the actual event and less sap. lol. Is anybody still even reading?

For something put together in a mere two weeks, Trin and their team did an amazing job. Three recording set ups, graphics, a pot, a venue... props to them for gathering the scraps and making a whole out of it. And to think we almost didn’t go.

Madeline (Swanner) ended up coming and it was honestly so good to see her. We aren’t particularly close, but she’s someone I’ve come to care for and just want happiness for her.

Major spoiler, but I don’t think anybody who cares about PM/P+ doesn’t know Kevin won the tournament.

Everyone expected a pop-off, but Kevin just sat there, crying.

I don’t think there’s ever been anything that Kevin has been more passionate about. He loves this game; he loves this community. Never did it ever occur to him that he would win.

I wish I could say more, but honestly, him winning stunned me speechless. And if you didn’t know, the first thing he said after was that he had to call his mother.

His mom is one of his biggest supporters and I love her to death. She has such a huge heart and has never, ever frowned upon Kevin’s love for the game, whole-heartedly supporting it.

I hugged Maddy, because I can’t even imagine how heart-breaking it must be for her to see what could have been on the mainstage. I imagined how much it must’ve hurt her because she just loves the game and the community, but to see it constantly be torn down by Nintendo and her unable to do anything... Give Maddy a hug and thank her if you see her. She deserves the world.

We ended up walking home with PNW, Bob, Mar, Bongo, Cameron (LoyaL), Ivan, and a few others, honestly too dark to completely see and name. It was a very nice night.

We did, however, pass by the rundown house that definitely looked like if we were to talk in there, we’d be killed by the axe murderer that lived there.

Kevin also lagged behind a lot because his phone notifications were going off like crazy and I was worried he was going to just get lost in the darkness or get hit by a car. Stop looking at your phone when you cross the street, dammit.

We got back to our hotel room and ordered pizza - it was bad. God-fucking-dammit, Ohio, why do you suck so much? Kind of a shitty dinner to end the day on, but nothing else was open at 2am. FeelsBadMan.

#Super Smash Bros.#Project M #Project Plus #Nintendo #Riptide #Undertow #Fuck Nintendo

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