#an absolute loser who i want biblically

[ex-textura]

Didn’t some devs say his explosion ending is his good ending? And that he was the annoying guy? Did they try to write a character we’d laugh at and find pathetic and hate? Because if they did, they failed.

So I went back through my screenshots to get quotes from that article but I've only got the one, and I'm so sorry but I'm gonna talk about it:

Obviously, I very vocally took issue with this article when it came out and to be clear I still do. But I want to be more clear, I think, on the actual issue I have with it.

I'm not annoyed that they call Gale annoying. I know he is. Hell, he knows he is, to some degree. That's part of his character and part of I think why so many of us relate to him. I'm annoying as fuck, despite all the years I spent trying to make myself smaller and more palatable so that people would like me.

The issue I have is the way they talk about it. I don't have a screenshot of the part where they said that his death is a good ending and I'm not totally sure that's even the correct wording (I don't think it is) so I'm not gonna touch on that but the bit at the end of this particular quote, that he "gives himself for the world" just rubs me the wrong way.

Killing yourself to save the world isn't redemption for being annoying. It's such an extreme as to be laughable.

And I'm not saying it's the wrong ending at all. There are no wrong endings this is a role playing game. Play the role you want.

But there's a feeling of....I dunno. I don't think glorification is the right word but it's the best I can come up with... In the way they talk about it and the way the game treats it.

Yes. Gale can absolutely kill himself to save the world. That's very much an option and it's a dramatic way to end the story of a frankly very dramatic man.

But he doesn't HAVE to. This isn't the only choice presented to him especially by the end of the game! You've been given so much power and so many allies and so much time to get to know him and his story and the root of it all. He's had time to grow, to see the truth of his relationship with Mystra and if you're kind to him, to see his worth beyond just what his magic can provide.

At the end of it all to look at him and say "okay anyway, time to pay your dues" and let him explode is definitely a big ending. But it's not a "good" ending. It's tragic and, in my opinion, feels like a waste of what might have been a lot of growth for him.

And then that, added to all the different ways everyone can shit on him like no other companion throughout the game, is what makes the whole thing so sour for me.

They made a character that talks a lot, that is arrogant and can't read the room and kind of weird. But they also made him earnest and kind and passionate. The way his self-importance wars with his self-esteem is so interesting and relatable.

And then they said fuck this guy and I guess we didn't take it the way they meant for us to 🤷‍♂️

[minijenn]

Jen Tortures Herself With Every Dreamworks Animated Movie Ever: Prince of Egypt

Papa Bless (literally) its time for me to talk about one of my favorite animated movies, nay, one of my favorite MOVIES ever made. Prince of Egypt is a work of art. Hands down, it is one of the most incredible movies I have ever seen. I'm not even religious (I did grow up Christian and am now a Filthy Heathen but that's beside the point). The real point is that this movie is one that I think can be enjoyed by anyone reguardless of religion. At its core, they took a simple biblical story and turned it into something with raw passion and emotion and art. And I simply adore it.

Every time I watch this movie, its such an experience for me. I always fall in love with new things, from the fantastic character designs, to the insanely lovely animation to the beautiful songs and score to the way the story is told and the emotions the characters go through with it. Everything in this movie feels huge, weighty, and important. It's very respectful to its source material while making changes that make it work better as a film, particularly the brotherly dynamic between Moses and Rameses that adds a whole new layer of drama onto the story.

As for that story, we all know the Exodus story by now so I'll spare you on that and discuss the things the movie does on its own. That dynamic between Moses and Rameses is at the heart of the movie and it really is just a devestating tragedy to watch them break apart and become enemies because of the huge responsibilities thrust onto both of their shoulders. The fact that tragedy ends on such a heartcrushing note too its just... god. (literally god, get it? cause this is all his fault lol jk ok)

Moses is fantastically written, a great main character to follow who has compelling drama, at first about his true identity and how he struggles to comes to terms with it and then grappling with having to oppose Rameses to set the Hebrews free. Rameses himself may just be one of Dreamworks best villains, you really do feel bad for him but you also know he's bringing so much of this suffering on himself because of his own stubborn pride. The rest of the cast is also fantastic, Tzipporah is lovely and really fun, Miriam is an absolute sweetheart, Aaron is a sassy little loser but I love how he comes around in the end, and well, God is God (the burning bush scene tho, can we talk about that? fucking INSANE)

The MUSIC man, each song is SO damn good its hard for me to even pick a favorite. Deliver Us is such a strong opening, a wonderful way to set the stage that makes the stakes feel high right from the start. All I Ever Wanted is a great way to show the life Moses always knew cracking from the inside out. Through Heaven's Eyes is just a bop with a lovely message about change and growth. Playing with the Big Boys is delightfully sinister and the Plagues, oh GOD THE PLAGUES???? INSANE MAN SO DRAMATIC AND INTENSE AND THE IMAGERY IS JUST??!?!?! BRUH! When You Believe might be my favorite though, it starts out somber but grows into this hopeful triumph of excitement and relief and its absolutely beautiful.

This movie is so beautiful to look at too! The composition of some of these shots, the storyboarding, the facial expressions, the set pieces, the movement of the animation, its all so expertly crafted, so entrancing to watch every second of it. Like I said at the start, this movie truly is an utter work of art in every sence of the word.

I've been gushing about this movie for long enough I think, but I can't help it! It's honestly that good! And its so hard to believe that it came hot off the heels of a trash heap like Antz. Like bruh how were they cooking that shit and the godsend that is Prince of Egypt at the same time??? Insane, utterly insane. This studio is ridiculous.

Anyway, Prince of Egypt is the GOAT and I will fight you if you disagree.

Overall Rating: 10/10

Verdict: Tzipporah marry me pls

Previous Review (Antz)

Next Review (Road to El Dorado)

[catholic-character-tournament]

Round 1 - Resurrect Bracket (Losers Bracket) Side B

ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to [make it to the finals]

Propaganda below ⬇️

Kirei

He fucked up so many people's lives so badly in just one decade (not on purpose) that the universe put him in the summoning pool of all world influencing souls. He doesnt really have any special powers but he does serve as a vessel for rasputin at one point. He's the guy who says "people die when they are killed"

please please please there's literally a type moon character in the gif on the top of this form so it's typemoonphobic if none of them get in but it shouldn't be her it should be kirei bc he's 50x funnier & more iconic than jeanne. funny lil murder priest who's fucking THE gilgamesh (from the epic of) in the church basement and dies in a knife fight w a 17 year old whose dad he wanted to fuck back in '94 before realizing that he was actually kinda lame and he's been bitter abt it ever since. he has an orphan torture factory in his basement but he's also canonically good at being a priest. he's so funny you should def try his mapo tofu i swear it's totally safe for human consumption and not made with any california reapers. did i mention he's a deadbeat dad.

View on Twitter

Priest claims to be Pro Life to make Sakura Matou the most miserable girl on the planet, but he dies anyway.

bro became a catholic because he loves suffering

He’s a priest. Kind of. Not a very good priest obviously. There is something seriously wrong and fucked up with that man. It’s so entertaining.

he's gotta be one of the most insane catholic men ever with a very in-depth and interesting relationship with his religion and his relationship with god also he's the sexiest man ever to be conceptualized in the known universe and all of time

Will never forget the 40+ minute monologue in heavens feel being a thinly veiled metaphor for abortion

he wants to torment churchgoers and make them face their failures and suffering but all he ends up doing is motivate them to improve themselves. cringefail moment for him

he's absolutely insane. the coldhearted mercenary that barely reacts to anything is terrified of kirei. he's super fucked up. his ult in stay night is literally him channeling divine power into something called kyrie eleison. he's the vessel of rasputin (on account of being a priest with a huge....no i shant say) the biblical beast in grand order among other things. he gets drunk with and tops gilgamesh from the epic of gilgamesh in the church basement after gilgamesh from the epic of gilgamesh bats his eyes a little too hard at kirei in some of the horniest shot scenes ive ever seen. he also used to be a heretical "fixer" for the church, cleaning up scenes that would expose shit to the public. uhh what else. he holds cool swords between his fingers like a kid pretending to be wolverine but in my favorite route he just squares the hell up with the protagonist and they fight to the death outside planned parenthood

Soap

Religious trauma coded. Popular hc that his family is Catholic.

He's gay and has a funny hair cut. Is that not enough to be Catholic?

he was such a bad bitch they had to kill him off in the third game bc he would've mopped the floor with the main antagonist otherwise. rip soap keep thotting it up in heaven we miss u every day

`!!!6ths -- propaganda by my kitten

[chaifootsteps]

I had the same question ever since the pilot, but in light of Lucifer being a loser and Lilith hating him, I still have to wonder.

Why in the ever fuck does Charlie, who keep in mind is at least 200 year old, give even a slight shit about the sinners, who she's probably seen the absolute worst of because she's two centuries old, especially when as the princess of all of hell, she has plenty of other subjects who aren't busy relentlessly killing and eating each other all day? The few sinners she even KINDA regularly get along with are Alastor and Vaggie, and the former outright stated he would have tried to murder everyone there if he wanted to, and you know, he's a cannibal that probably sees the entire cast as potential meals, and the latter exists almost entirely to get sidelined by the story and pushed aside by the dude who's very specifically nicer to women.

I just don't get it considering neither one of her parents are portrayed anywhere else that actually knows about biblical stuff to have the best relationships with humanity.

A couple of years ago I would have said that this is probably one of those things that'll be answered in the series, but that was then and it probably won't.

[talkshow-shitlord]

ofunholylambs the plagiarist

@ofunholylambs, known as Kirby (formerly Eden, formerly Buttons) is a plagiarist. An art thief. And if they do a commission or a custom for you, I can near to guarantee that it is, in fact, a scam, ripping you off by copying someone else's work.

Over the past year in the Helluva Boss/Hazbin Hotel fandom over on Twitter, he has been stalking, harassing, tracing art, playing the victim, telling people to KYS via CuriousCat, deadnaming, misgendering, and various other things... all because someone dared to make a sheep demon OC that shared his (at the time) extremely biblical name.

And had that been the only incident, it would be understandable... but mind, this little loser also was positive Laila (the purple sheep from the Alastor comic) was a rip off of his OC. He genuinely believed that, just because she is a sheep demon OC. This has become a troubling pattern, which has also included such beautiful moments as ATTEMPTING TO OUT A TRANS MAN TO HIS NOT-AT-ALL SUPPORTIVE PARENTS, and when that didn't work out the way he wanted it to, he decided to instead accuse the same person of being a groomer (despite the fact that he, himself, had encouraged someone with D.I.D. who had a younger alter to perform sexual roleplays with him at one point).

Needless to say, this is not an individual that you want to be around your page, he isn't someone that you want in your life, and he isn't someone that you should want on Tumblr either. That goes double for anyone with an Alastor-based account, either, as he WILL force his romantic feelings onto you, and when you don't reciprocate (because he's a 4'9" manchild who never bathes, cleans up after himself, or takes responsibility for anything) he will do everything he can to hurt you. Including, based on him being friends with @ruskeptical, being someone that actively produces CP (as both of them live in the US, even art that isn't based off a real person is a jail or prison worthy offense, with both of them admitting to doing so).

And that's not even talking about all the racism, the threats, the blackmail, and so, so, SO much more, I would be here all day if I tried to tell you it all.

Put simply, Ladies and Gentlemen... the guy is absolutely out of his mind, purely delusional, with no buffer. And now he's trying to steal and scam people out of money. Do the right thing, Tumblr; toss this fucking trash out the door.

Below are the ORIGINAL concepts for the In Wonderland AU outfit that he CLAIMS to have created first, made by the original artist _bunnihopper_ on Twitter, from November 17th, 18th, and December 15th — and, as a final note, before I bid you all adieu; note the particular wording in the second image for an extra creepy realization...

Stay safe out there, everyone, and remember not to trust a wolf in sheep's clothes.

[livvyofthelake]

um ok so basically. i need rachel sennott so bad. like biblically. carnally. * **** ** *** ** *** ******* *** ***** *** ***** **** *** **** **** **** *********. don't worry about what any of that says. anyway so her character in bottoms was crazy she sucked so bad she was so pathetic she spent half the movie having a broken nose or black eyes it was sexy it was hot it was massive. her lesbian femcel realness. her cunt swag. she was just a real fucking bitch. i want her in me. who said that. oh my god anyway.... yeah and then of course ayo edebiri slayed crazy hard. she was like every nerd loser boy character in every high school comedy for the past thirty years but she was a lesbian, unparalled character writing. i loved the part where she ****** ****** **** ***..... i loved the part where. sorry i had to stop typing to gigggle about that scene again. i can't get into the specifics but the climax of the movie involves her essenitally firemans carrying nicholas galitzine. it's hard to explain you'll get it when you see it. but it was funny as hell... she also has this monologue at the very beginning of the movie that had me absolutely cackling... speaking of, this movie was SO GODDAMN FUNNY. we were laughing up a storm, we laughed more than any of the other people in that theater, all 6 of them. big crowd.... anyway we were sitting in the back row just fucking cackling and screaming and giggling up a storm i don't even care if it was annoying i deserved to be seeing that movie more than any of the other people there... you don't understand there were men there. i HOPE i ruined their experience fr. like it was 90 minutes long and i'm telling you i spent at least half that time laughing i've never seen a funnier movie in my life i'm so so so serious...

[neroushalvaus]

downton for the blorbo meme 🌼

Thank you for enabling me gushing about My Show, anon! <3

blorbo: Well. Well. He is the character I think about when I hear the term "Blorbo from My Shows". He has bewitched me, body and soul. He is my current icon. He is a goddamn loser. I have loved him for six years. My love for him has once again struck me like a bolt of lightning. He will probably be the answer to most of the simlish words on this meme. He is Thomas Barrow.

scrunkly: Is it weird that all my scrunklies are literal children... Anyway, Sybbie, George and Marigold. They are my scrunklies.

scrimblo bimblo: I think Mrs Patmore is underappreciated considering that apart from being one of the funniest characters on the show (I accidentally wrote "hottest characters"... freudian slip much...), she is also a very interesting character and has an interesting (gay) dynamic with Mrs Hughes. Also! There can never be enough love for the actual gay icon that is Septimus Spratt.

glup shitto: Philip Villiers, the Duke of Crowborough with his ten minutes of screentime during which he tried and failed to manipulate mansplain malewife himself some goddamn pocket money. Him never being mentioned again was homophobia at it's finest. But tbh, Downton has many glub shittos for me since the show is so good at introducing good concepts and then abandoning them. Margie Drewe is my actual favourite character who never did anything wrong. Irina Kuragin is a milf supreme and I wish she pulled me out of a carriage by my hair. Thomas Barrow absolutely power bottomed the butler Stowell and good for him. Miss Wilkins and Sarah O'Brien got to know each other in the biblical sense.

poor little meow meow: Thomas Barrow. 101%. He is just so pathetic. I'm pretty sure he'd fall apart and cry if you told him you are proud of him. I want to lift his chin up with my gilded walking stick like he was a shivering victorian street urchin.

horse plinko: Tormenting Thomas Barrow is really fun! Sadly Julian Fellowes agrees with me!

eeby deeby: I send Sarah O'Brien to superhell for her extremely lesbian crimes. And you know, for using society's homophobia to get her former best friend fired. And also for attempting to kill her girlfriend in season one. But you know. I love to see a girlboss winning.

Send me a fandom and I'll tell you my blorbo etc!

[tce070]

The Ameba Virus Manifesto Part VI

The world is small on a computer.  You can reach different people from all across the globe in an instant through social media, email, forums, blogs, etcetera but what makes it happen is motive.  This is the question of why?  Why do people do the things that they do?  I’m compelled to write the Ameba Virus Manifesto Part VI because of this aching question we ask ourselves everyday.

If you know who I am, you know that the revolution flows through my veins.  I hate the system and what its done to me but then again I’m also very thankful for what it has done for me.  The government has taught me everything I know via public school but the people shouldn’t be afraid of their government.   The government should be afraid of the people.  What happened yesterday was a rogue leader incited a mob just like Adolf Hitler did on Crystal Night but instead of Jewish homes and businesses being ransacked it was the Senate building!  

In the 18th century, English royalty was appalled to find out a bunch of crazy white men dressed as Indians and dumped all the imported tea straight into the harbor!  A new revolution is happening before our very eyes!  The mob in Washington DC was just a minut group of Trump supporters.  Alligators in the swamp!  Crocodiles in Cancun.  Humans all over the Earth.  

We both know that the internet is an open forum for revolution.  Information and messages are uploaded on a daily basis.  Terabytes of it!  Whatever is after terabytes.  Now I have been actively uploading since I started this blog back in 2012 when the Mayan Doomsday was gonna happen.  I did it because before it was the Mayan Doomsday it was something else!  Y2K or whatever the fuck Christian preachers have been setting dates in time for thousands of years so back in 2012 I figured I would try to put a stop to it.  

I have emailed thousands of journalists stating that I casted Lucifer Satan into the pits of Hell for 1000 years and the next day when I woke up the Pope resigned!  I have passed out tens of thousands of flyers across the nation in an attempt to campaign to become the Antichrist.  Why would I want to become the Antichrist you may ask?  And I’m not talking about being some loser that tats 666 on his ass cheek I am talking about seriously becoming God’s greatest enemy!  Why would I wanna do that you may ask?  Because somebody has to do it and the news media has failed in calling out who the Antichrist is before.  I will use the mark of the beast which is O o or 0 to do absolutely nothing!  Why would I want to become the Antichrist and do nothing?  To prove to all of you just how wrong prophecy can be.

The 7 years of tribulation have turned into 9 and the 144,000 mark has been obliterated.  I have lost multiple jobs, went to mental hospitals, went to jail, and lost all my friends.  I have said some of the most outrageous things imaginable but check out my comic strips online #BATHOSCODA #APROPOSGENESIS alien zombie shape shifting reptilian creatures ever since 2013!  I have written over 20 short stories to help people understand the things that go on in my head.  I believe that Christmas and Easter are just as much a conspiracy as 9/11 and the Boston Marathon bombings.  I think God is Allah and Allah is God.  Jesus is the son of Mary and the Jewish Messiah is still MIA.  The truth is I am tired of End Time Biblical Prophecies because the truth is the sun is gonna disintegrate the Earth in 500 million years.  

Carter Troughton

The Internet 

[olliethealright]

Three Steps From Home - Update #1

trigger warnings: religious content, abusive relationship, mental health, slight self harm implications, conversion therapy 

disclaimer: these are my own words and ideas, please do not use my words or ideas without permission from me.

Hi everyone! Today I’m going to do a lil update on one of my current WIPs, Three Steps From Home. I’m going to be talking about the first four chapters, aka the first 4500ish words. If you want a more detailed description of the book or the characters, my last post is the introduction to this project, so you can find more details there.

chapter one - casual acquaintances - 969 words

theme song - like or like like, by miniature tigers 

In this chapter, we meet the point of view character, Jude, as well as his love interest, Aaron. This chapter is mainly to introduce Jude’s voice and worldview, as well as how he sees Aaron without really knowing him. The inciting incident comes near the end of the chapter, when Aaron sits down to talk to Jude for the first time and the two strike up a conversation and Jude tries (and fails) to make a move.

“Even my mother’s Saturday night bingo group, who hated outsiders like they hated blasphemy, wouldn’t stop talking about you, or ‘that boy Aaron from the coffee shop,’ as they called you. ‘The cute one with the accent’. On those nights, I sipped spiked lemonade and passed out homemade cookies and tried not to hang onto their every word whenever you came into conversation”

“I supposedly worked from home, but I couldn’t stand home, so I worked from your coffee shop and pretended I wasn’t just another kid with a pile of student debt and a semi-failing career, living with his mother like an absolute loser. I pretended I didn’t watch you every time the production line of presentations got dull, every time the words swam from the page and my brain turned the texture of the dollops of whipped cream you put in hot chocolate”

chapter two - microwave dinners - 1347 words

theme song - untitled, by EDEN

This is the chapter where we meet Jude’s mom, who is honestly a piece of work. Jude is 21 at the start of the story, living with his mother as he saves money and continues to take computer science classes. His mother’s religion is a big source of tension in the story, and their unhealthy relationship is the centerpiece of this chapter. Jude comes home to find his mother watching a televangelist program, which eventually leads them to a fight, implying his mother’s wish to send him to conversion therapy, as well as alluding to Jude’s dad, who is not present in the story for unknown reasons.

“It was my dad who insisted on naming me Jude. He said it was biblical, but not overly so, not like the names my mother had picked. He always told me I was named for the book of Jude so I would remember what would happen if I lost my faith. Really, he named me Jude because it was near impossible for my mother’s native Spanish tongue to get right, and he liked watching her frustrated, he liked helping her get there”

“As it was, we walked on eggshells. My dad was no longer there to be a buffer between her anger and me. His name hovered in the air between us like a bomb, every time I brought him up, she would cross herself and mutter something like a prayer and get angrier by the second. I made myself scarce in hopes she would forget that her no longer perfect child still lurked under her roof like an unwanted animal, taking up the space the man she once loved did not”

chapter three - tea at midnight - 1042 words

theme song - perfume, by mehro

This chapter is very cute and wholesome, it balances out the sad feels you get from chapter two. In this chapter, Jude asks Aaron to hang out, and the two end up at a 24 hour tea shop, where they stay and talk until they have to get ready for work the next morning. There’s not much to this chapter events wise, but it does mark their first dateish thing, and it develops their characters a lot. It’s definitely one of my favorite chapters because of how light and dreamy it is.

“Maybe it was because I picked up a Mandarin-to-English dictionary to prove my point, but you obviously didn’t buy my story. You watched me over the corner of your fourth novel-in-progress, eyebrows raised so high they disappeared behind the rims of your glasses.

You glanced at your watch and sighed. ‘You know I’m going to have to kick you out in four minutes, yeah? Is there something I can get you?’”

“We sat in the cafe until we had created an impressive mound of dirty tea cups and the morning sun kissed our cheeks. We only left when we had to get ready for work. I was exhausted, an important afternoon meeting I had neglected to prepare for loomed like a distant storm cloud, but for the first time in a long while, I was happy, and I think you were too”

chapter four - circles - 1155 words

theme song - they’ll like me when im sick, by flatsound

This is my least favorite chapter in the book so far, and I’ll probably rework it, so everything in this part is subject to massive change (even more than the rest of this post). Basically, this is the chapter where both Jude and the reader get the sense that Aaron has problems he doesn’t talk about. Jude comes into Aaron’s coffee shop at his usual time and notices that Aaron is kind of out of it. Aaron’s coworker eventually convinces Jude to take Aaron home, and Jude spends the rest of the day trying to figure out what's wrong (spoiler, he doesn’t figure it out). This chapter also has a bit of a reflective aspect, as Jude criticizes himself for the things he should have done better. 

Again, this chapter is a mess and I don’t know how to explain what happens well. Sorry about that lol.

 “When I opened the door, your coworker’s eyes widened in a look that demanded attention. She jerked her head at you twice, a spectacularly unsubtle gesture, and then pointed out the door and in the direction of your apartment” 

“Fifteen minutes later, you slipped into the booth next to me instead of across the table, breaking our little routine for the second time that day. You pressed your back into my shoulder and brought one knee to your chest, your other foot dangling over the edge of the seat. I squeezed your hand under the table (always under the table) and tried not to worry”

Well, there it is! I hope you enjoyed this update if you’ve made it this far! As always, let me know if you have any questions about the story. I hope you have a nice day!

-ollie

[thegreymoon]

"I actually do like Crowley and Aziraphale, but the moment they step off screen" Same. I also tried to read the book and ditched it because it was too precious. I only watched 'Good Omens' because of all the fabulous Tumblr gifs and ... Michael Sheen and David Tennant are so lovely. The rest, not so much. ps Watched the first Underworld movie just to see Michael Sheen :) Also Kate Beckinsale looks great :)))

I genuinely liked the book at the beginning, while it was all Crowley and Aziraphale. The social and religious commentary was a lot of fun and I love books that subvert the biblical order of things! Things rapidly went downhill, however, when they got to Shadwell, Newt, Anathema and the kids. Like I said, I can’t really hate on the kids except to say that they bored me senseless. Shadwell, however, is just an overall repulsive character and the less said about Newt the better. They kicked me right out of the book, I just couldn’t get through it, and the show was not any better either. The only reason I decided to finish it is because it had such a huge cultural impact and for a while there, it was like a tsunami, you could not avoid it. Also, Sheen and Tennant are definitely very cute. 

I feel like there was such a great idea here, but when it comes to subverting the common religious tropes, I think Supernatural did a better job with this very same concept (and yes, I know that they were ‘inspired’ by Good Omens). As for the Antichrist, the Armageddon bored me senseless. Again, the whole idea of the Antichrist not being particularly evil and averting the end of the world by choosing to be human has been done better. One really cannot sit down to watch this after watching Damien and leave feeling anything but underwhelmed. It was so unsatisfying!  

The acting was also atrocious across the board, with the exception of Sheen and Tennant, who did manage to keep me entertained and rooting for their characters, however, the rest were laughably bad. The less said about Jake Whitehall the better, and wtf Jon Hamm? I watched Mad Men, he brought so much nuance to that role, he was fantastic! He was evil and unlikeable, sure, but he was really good at it! I was taken off guard by this jeering, scenery-chewing, unconvincing performance. Everything about Heaven and Hell was so low-budget and unsubtle, I have absolutely nothing good to say. 

And since I’m on my soapbox here, let me just vent my anger a bit about the whole Shadwell/Tracy and Newt/Anathema bullshit. Both of these are pet peeves of mine and I really have no patience for this nonsense. Shadwell was nothing but vile the entire time, he is despicable in so many ways, he’s bigoted, misogynistic, insensitive, unintelligent, dishonest. He neither showers nor cleans up after him and I bet you can smell him coming from a mile away. There is nothing redeemable about him at all except for the fact that so many men find him quirky and harmless because they remind them of their own fathers and grandfathers, who were equally toxic to the women in their life. And then you have Madame Tracy, who for all her scammy ways is shown as beautiful and intelligent and vibrant and good-hearted, and for some reason, she chooses this dumpster fire of a man and wears him down with her patience and goodness and womanly wiles (such as making him lunch regularly and making sure his basic needs are taken care of). The same goes for Newt and Anathema. Newt may not be straight-up abusive and evil like his disgusting superior, but he is still a loser and a huge underachiever, and somehow he is paired with Anathema, who is driven, talented. intelligent and stunning! I loathe this trope with my entire being, when an entire failure of a man is put together with a woman way, way out of his league just because everything is supposed to work out perfectly on the romantic front for every loser out there. Yuck. There is so much more I want to say here about the sexism and misogyny and straight-up toxic tropes, but this is getting too long as it is, so I will stop. 

Anyway, on to happier things! I really loved Michael Sheen in Underworld! Lucian was a fantastic character! Kate Beckinsale is very gorgeous, but she rubs me the wrong way for some reason, so I did not enjoy her as much. I still watched the entire franchise for the lovely men they kept bringing on and then killing off. I’m beyond mad about that and I wrote off the entire mess when they killed Scott Speedman’s Michael, but then they had to go and bring Bradley James on as an evil vampire 😭 RIP me, I will never escape this series 😭😭

[admiralty-xfd]

Culmination

It’s my one year A03 anniversary and I’d love to share with you all my first fanfic, it’s very close to my heart and I hope you enjoy it. I’ll post one chapter here every day but I’ll link to the full story below if you ever want to jump ahead. :)

CHAPTER ONE

CREATION

(Pilot)

SCULLY

In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. The sun and the stars, the plant life, the animals, and eventually, one man and one woman. These two human beings were a new beginning, the start of something big, something important. The beginning of life in this universe… or at least, what we know of it.

This is what Dana Katherine Scully was taught as a child in Sunday school. Her father and mother were devoted Catholics and she knew no other truth. Although growing older has reduced the biblical lesson to allegory in her scientific mind, she still believes in her heart that this is the way all things begin: with intent, with purpose, with meaning.

She thinks of this story the day she meets Fox Mulder. As she opens the door to his basement office, there’s something in the air; an electricity, an excitement, a new beginning that seems fated. She doesn’t believe in destiny, necessarily, but if she did she’d feel it today.

She takes in her surroundings before she has a chance to take him in. The walls are absolutely covered with what must be Agent Mulder, as if his insides are on display, bared for the world to see if only anyone would notice. Newspaper clippings, crime scene photographs, crop circle diagrams, tiny scraps of a life obsessed litter the room. The central feature of his office is a poster of a UFO with the words “I Want to Believe” scrawled guilelessly across the bottom. She’s not the type to judge a book by its cover so she reproaches herself for sizing him up before she even lays eyes on him, but she feels like she can see pieces of him everywhere.

As he turns to greet her, she notes that he is a bit older than her, seasoned but still quite young. She immediately finds him attractive, and just as immediately relegates these thoughts to the back of her mind. Entertaining them would be a mistake. She’s here to work, to distinguish herself. She wants to build a reputation at the FBI, not be given one.

His face is boyish, as is his exuberance. When he speaks to her he looks her in the eye, which she respects. He has the fascination of a child discovering the wonders of the world around him.

She doesn’t know it yet but meeting him will change the course of her entire life.

The more she learns about him, the more she respects his views and the completely unique way in which he sees the world. She drinks it up, admires his devotion. He’s not like the other men she’s met at the Bureau, the ones who have something to prove and answer that call with relentless ambition, who treat her like something less, someone who doesn’t belong. Mulder is driven, passionate, but not in pursuit of a ladder; in pursuit of his own dreams and desires. He’s extraordinary.

Most importantly, he truly sees her.

There’s an undeniable spark they share, that she can sense whenever they’re in each other’s presence. He’s almost an entire foot taller than her, but when they speak they stand so close she has to physically crane her neck to look at him. She doesn’t understand why they do this, why they have this need to be so near each other, but it’s immediate and natural. It’s a magnetism she can’t deny.

When he’s with her he seems to lose his sense of personal boundaries. He stands too close, or gently touches her elbow. He holds doors for her and guides her by the small of her back. She doesn’t mind it, which is unusual for her. She rarely lets men get away with these things. But Mulder isn’t like other men; he does this absently, naturally, without purpose or agenda. She knows he doesn't mean it to be, but she suspects it’s more territorial than gentlemanly. And that’s fine with her, because she is his and he is hers in some unidentifiable way. Somehow, this is just how things are going to be.

As they move forward together in their partnership, they learn to know each other better. He challenges her in ways she never dreamed of. His theories and methods are unlike any she’s seen back at the academy, or anywhere else, for that matter. Every day is exciting, perplexing and remarkable, and the intellectual connection they share is unlike any other she’s ever experienced. She feels truly blessed to have met him. His presence in her life feels like an unexpected gift dropped directly into her lap.

Her friends in the Bureau think he’s a joke. “Spooky” Mulder. A loser. A wasted opportunity. An incredibly smart and talented agent squandering his life away on ridiculousness. But she knows the truth: when she is with him he cracks her world wide open. When they are together, she’s learning to believe. Whenever anyone condemns him, she defends him like a lioness defending her pride. She sees something in him no one else seems to see: limitless potential.

More than that, she likes him. He has become her friend. They have developed a genuine bond, and an affection for one another which she can’t quite yet identify but she can feel; more real and tangible than most of the monsters that elude them.

She often wonders if she’s helping or hindering him more. She feels that he trusts her, and that trust has been hard earned. But there are times when he will pull away from her, as if he’s gone somewhere in his mind she knows she cannot follow. Those are the times he can drive her absolutely crazy, and she can’t decide whether she wants to kill him or kiss him. She’s definitely thought about doing both.

It isn’t long before she regards him as the only person she can trust with her life. It will be much longer before she trusts him with her heart.

This is the start, the beginning. A new beginning for her, and what has now become the two of them. Everything always comes back to the two of them: seeking, finding, and seeking some more. They are so different, yet always share the same goal, like two roads meeting from opposite directions merging into each other, leading as one into oblivion.

MULDER

Trust no one.

Fox William Mulder knows this inherently before any of his informants ever warn him. He’s felt it most of his life, probably before any kid should. When his sister Samantha disappeared, he stopped trusting his parents. As he grew older and began his journey at the FBI, that distrust extended to the government. An organization he believed was dedicated to seeking the truth had revealed its own corruption over the years. Even personal relationships have been difficult; he's found it hard to get too close to anyone for too long.

His instincts tell him to distrust his new partner before he meets her. He’s well aware of the Bureau’s intentions regarding his work. Dr. Dana Scully’s presence in his office feels intrusive at first, unwelcome. He’s done his homework on her, and had believed he’d gotten a general idea of the person they’ve sent from upstairs to shut him down, reign him in.

But the person standing in front of him now doesn’t do his preconceived notions any justice. She’s tenacious, energized, engaged. She looks at him, really listens when he’s speaking. He likes that because he isn’t used to it.

She’s younger than he expected, and green, so green. He wants to use the word “adorable” but somehow he knows better. She’s smart as hell, probably smarter than he is, and probably too smart for her own good. Her brain is definitely going to get in the way of her gut, as well as his. This partnership is going to be tricky but he’s up for the challenge.

She wears a gold cross around her neck, which he finds fascinating considering she doesn’t seem to believe in anything outside the realm of science. He makes a mental note to ask her about it someday.

As they talk in his office, he can’t help but think of Diana Fowley. She and Scully are nothing alike, he can already tell, but the comparison enters his mind automatically. The similar minds he and Diana shared were helpful when he’d first discovered the X Files. She’d agreed with him on practically everything. It helped them find cases, but they’d had a tough time actually solving them. He knows now she wasn’t the right fit for him, in more ways than one. Yet another person he’d placed his trust in who had abused it.

He can’t help but find Scully attractive, but after what happened with Diana he resolves he will not let it interfere with their partnership. He feels a pang at this thought, because something in him is telling him this is different, this person could be the one, this person is safe to love. He already loves her but doesn’t want to admit it. He can’t. He can’t risk a similar outcome. Everything about Diana was a huge mistake.

Anyway, she’s well in his past. This new person Scully appears to be his future. Only time will tell exactly what kind of future that will turn out to be.

Her wide blue eyes capture his immediately, and through them he feels as if she might be knowable. He’s always dismissed the old adage about the eyes being the window to the soul until this very moment, looking into hers. There will be many moments in his future when he will get lost in them.

Other agents in the Bureau call each other by their first names, but he never calls her Dana. He doesn’t really know why, but he does know he doesn’t want her to call him Fox. Besides, he likes how “Scully” sounds. It’s endearing to him. He’s called her Scully so many times it feels strange now to call her anything else. And she calls him Mulder in response, like it’s their own private shorthand. They’ve accepted one another as equals without having to acknowledge it verbally.

He likes the way she says his name, too. She’s got about twelve versions. His favorites are “annoyed” and “exasperated.” She’s cute when she’s exasperated.

As they fall comfortably into their new partnership, he quickly discovers she’s a perfect counterpoint to everything he thinks and feels. They begin phone conversations like they’re already in the middle of one. He lobs a theory at her, and her backhand is immediate and usually accompanied by a raised skeptical eyebrow. Sometimes her skepticism can drive him absolutely crazy, but he’s completely charmed by her savvy. He knows she doesn’t believe in most of this stuff, but she listens and respects him, and sometimes he can tell he’s broken through. These are the moments he lives for. She hears him, which is something, really something.

Protecting her has become a priority in his life he hadn’t anticipated. Perhaps it’s displaced fear, or a remnant of the powerlessness he felt watching Samantha get torn away from him. But keeping Scully safe from harm feels like more than an obligation, it’s a primal need inside him. It feels like protecting her is protecting himself.

There are times when he feels as if his heart may burst from confusion and loneliness. In these moments he pulls away from her, keeps her at arm’s length. He knows it pisses her off but it’s self-preservation, he needs to do it. He wants to let her in, wants to badly, but he can’t. He wonders if he’s doomed to be lonely forever. Sometimes he doesn’t trust himself around her and he needs to wait to get that trust back.

Soon enough, he will give her his trust. It’s not something he can quantify or explain, but it’s deep in his gut, visceral, and if there’s one thing he’s always trusted it’s his instincts. He knows she’s in this with him, in a way no one really has been before. Somehow this person is going to be his partner, through and through, for the long haul. He can feel it.

He is careful with his heart, and always has been. But somehow deep down he knows one day she’ll find a way in. He wants to believe.

He’s completely unaware of how much he needs her. But she has arrived.

To continue reading click here. Otherwise, see you back here tomorrow!

[hysteriamodes]

The Problem with Raqiya: Gnostic Hot Take

Recently, I found this manga “Raqiya” again that I know I haven’t read in years while looking up articles on Gnosticism. I forget how I found it but I was excited when I found it. Art-wise, “Raqiya” uses words and terminology that a Gnostic would be familiar with. Though, when I finished the manga, my hype died down to annoyance. The manga does incorporate a lot of Gnosticism into its story and it uses quotes from Gnostic scripture, sure, but it completely undermines the main character, in my opinion.

The main character is this girl, Luna Hazuki, a high-school aged girl. 

Luna almost falls into the generic high school girl trope, like being a little flighty at times, obsessed with good food, and an optimistic personality. But don’t worry, none of these last long! To summarize her over-arching struggle,  Luna’s family was hit by a semi-truck while they stopped beside the road to make a pit stop. Her family is killed instantly and Luna is left an orphan. That is, until, a strange being comes to Luna, offering her to resurrect her family.

The being called Abraxas comes to her when she is looking for her deceased family. Abraxas refers to Luna as a descendant of Norea. Abraxas itself in Gnostic writing is either an Archon or an Aeon; it really just depends on what Gnostic teachings you follow. Aeon refers to an aspect of God (or the Godhead), an embodied form of God.  In Gnosticism, God has different incarnations, the Aeons, the most notable one being Sophia. As an Archon, Abraxas is akin to an angel, though, it being an Archon means it acts on the will of the Demiurge, which is the big bad in Gnosticism.

Now Abraxas tells her that it can bring back her family, for a price, which means the unwitting kid here agrees to a pact where she will offer 12 sacrifices. What Abraxas also mentions that caught my eye is Abraxas reference to Eleleth, the angel that comes to help Norea when she cries out for help to thwart the Archons’ desire to kill all humankind via the biblical flood. Norea can either be the daughter of Noah, Eve, wife to Seth, or a descendant of Seth. As a descendant of Seth, Norea possesses gnosis, the spark of God. As a wife and daughter of Eve, she posses the same importance. Sometimes Norea is regarded as Sophia after she falls from Pleroma.

As a descendant of Norea, this makes Luna very important as a Gnostic figure. By being a descendant of Norea, that puts Luna almost in the same regard as Yeshua (Jesus), is another incarnation of the divine wisdom. The constant barrage of questions to Luna “are you god?” is perfectly in good reason. As an incarnation of Sophia, that makes her an incarnation, of, well. God.

 As the story progresses and after Luna bumps into some interesting folklore figures, the sacrifices Abraxas mentions come full circle. As a result, Luna has the ability to heal herself and destroy others. She calls out divine forces over the earth to destroy it at the behest of Abraxas’ encouragement. It’s clear that Abraxas in this storyline is a servant of the Demiurge, just a terrible Archon trying to sway a divine incarnation by destroying the world.

After losing her mother, father, brother, uncle, aunt, and cousin, Luna’s will is understandably broken. She’s not able to stop those from dying around her, no matter how much she tries. And she’s devastated when a friend of her’s dies, despite the fact said friend is a soon-to-be priest out to kill her, she mourns his death. Luna is a very nice and compassionate person, slowly losing her grip on that as her life begins to spiral out of control.

Thankfully, Luna has her best friend, Isa, to help her out. Isa, having known her since childhood and following her back to her home country, is deeply in love with her. He sticks with her, even if their mutual friend dies.  

But here is where I start to have issues with it...

Having no choice but to completely give up, Luna allows Abraxas to somehow bring Eleleth down to earth to complete the destruction of the world. Eleleth is the one who saved Norea from the Archons, the angel of perfection, peace, and wisdom. Eleleth serves Sophia and God and it is not the intention of God to destroy the world and send everyone to Hell, not like the Chrisitan God (which, by the way, we Gnostics regard as the Demiurge), but this is the Sethian gnostic tradition we know. As the world is slowly dying and after a ridiculous barrage of a man that practices something clearly not Gnostic by having virgin sacrifices and orgies, followed by the pope, Isa’s gun-ho dad, and other people that I honestly don’t know where the hell they came from.

Isa’s dad encourages him to look for “Raqiya”, some divine plane of existence that... somehow manifests when all of these losers are doing the obligatory standing and watching this person destroy the world. You know, exposition. And honestly, this feels really rushed. We aren’t introduced to Isa’s family and when we meet his dad, he goes off on this quest to find out why this is happening and how to stop it and all of this doesn’t make any sense. There’s no set amount of time he’s doing this and if we’re going by what the manga is saying with Luna’s life, all of this is likely happening in the span of a handful of days. It feels out of place, it throws off the pacing of the manga, and it just really undermines Luna’s struggle and character.

When he learns about Raqiya, he figures he needs to tell his son, which I’m going to assume that he wants his son to know because he’s so close with Luna. And as he goes, he’s going into some portal, which, by the way, we don’t know how it manifested, how he’s able to do so being a regular human, and we’re just told he went to Raqiya. Okay.

Isa is then hurled into the light, Raqiya, or to Gnostics, Pleroma. Pleroma is where God resides as well as his Aeons and angels, all who find their way to Pleroma have finally obtained Gnosis. When one goes back to Pleroma, they have successfully shed their shells, their useless bodies, from the corrupted world. By doing this, they have essentially done what Yeshua/Christ has done years before. To which, by the way, makes each of us possess the same ability as Yeshua/Christ. In Gnosticism, salvation is not through the traditional sense of admitting to sinning and confessing our belief in God, it is by us finding the deep knowledge within ourselves. That God is in us.  

So when Isa reaches what I’m going to refer to as Pleroma (because it obviously is), the light tells him that it is essentially the creator--The Godhead. It asks him what he wants most now that (somehow) Isa found the secret knowledge to all that ever was and Isa, being the good guy he is, wishes to save his loved one, Luna. What happens next is really frustrating to me and this is when the manga tanked in my opinion. Isa somehow is able to absorb or at least gain some divine ability to speak as the Godhead and coming back to earth to save Luna, apparently.

Abraxas failing what they set out to do refers Isa as “Adam Kadmon”, the first being created from the cosmos, light embodied, and the soul of souls. Adam Kadmon is an important figure in Gnosticism though, I would argue that not nearly as important as Sophia, the aeon of wisdom. This also falls onto what school of thought you follow in Gnosticism (I follow Manichaeism and Sophian) but after all of this, Isa coming back now as what I assume to be Adam Kadmon, is then referred to as God himself. Nothing is stated how this came to conclusion or how Isa is able to become a god or God himself. The only thing that we know, which is vaguely stated, is that this light merged with Isa. What I may suggest is that Isa has left to Pleroma, shedding his mortal body, and what is now in his body possibly is Adam Kadom, or the aeon Logos. Logos is the divine word, partner of Sophia the divine wisdom. 

When Sophia falls from Pleroma and tries creation by herself, the Godhead sends out Logos to bring her back to the light. Logos and Sophia are syzygies, which basically means, well, partners. The manga doesn’t dip into this territory, which is disappointing and it would be very fitting for both (what is to be assumed as) Isa and Luna. If that were the case, Isa and Luna have brought the surviving people Gnosis, the divine spark, and everybody gets to go to Pleroma than suffer from the Demiurge and the Archons. 

No, the manga ends with this.

No explanation, everyone referring Isa as “God”. Isa turns into from an awkward shmuck to this big, thick dude that saves his lady love. Absolutely infuriating. It makes the story pretty trivial, offering the solution that the solution is love and takes away from the fact that the Gnostic godhead Monad actually has no gender whatsoever. Monad is referred to the mother-father, both bride and groom. Monad has no face or form; Monad comes through in the form of incarnations like Logos and Sophia.

If what I’m thinking that manga assumes that Isa merged with the divine light and became Monad instead of going the route it should via Isa becoming Logos, then that doubly undermines Luna’s character. In my opinion, neither one of them are the Godhead but Luna has become Sophia embodied and Isa has obtained Gnosis and possibly becoming Logos embodied. Gnostic thought is that we all can be just like Yeshua/Christ by just simply obtaining Gnosis and returning back from which we came, so to me, to consider them both Christ-like figures isn’t a stretch.

The fact that it delves off the cliff, never addressing how Isa was able to just go to Pleroma keeping his physical form if he became something else, or how did his father manage to gain this information in such a short amount of time really makes me angry. All we’re left with is the pope, that creepy virgin-sacrificing dude, and his dad just basically gaping at Luna while she’s destroying the world. And what also bothers me is Luna’s willingness to kill people telling her that they will help her and they’re “Gnostics” (... last time I checked, we don’t go out in SWAT gear for each other), the Catholic church is out to get Luna and they know who she is somehow, and literally no one tries to calm her down is maddening.

The pacing towards the end just sucks, it’s rushed together, poorly explained, and just takes away the potential Luna has a character. Luna starting off as any other teenager being highly immature and berating her friends for messing up, transforming into someone that could possibly help the world and becoming Sophia embodied never happens. Luna was maturing, she was transforming from what she was, and was learning more about herself. No, instead it dissolves into this mess and takes any chance away from Luna becoming a stronger character, not just a strong female lead. 

So, yeah, even if this comic is filled with quite a bit of fanservice, it had such an interesting concept, of a girl being a god or the destroyer of worlds and how she would mentally cope to that to something that feels like a copout. Not only could Luna transform into a stronger, but Isa could also have changed from a comic relief to a mature friend. And that’s just me speaking as someone looking at this as a fan of comics.

Now, on a spiritual level, it... genuinely feels a little insulting. Gnosticism does not say one gender is stronger than the other. It teaches that you do not need an organized church to help you find your salvation, that you don’t have to commit yourself to follow this religion, and that you’re not suffering because you were born from original sin or whatever. You are your own person and you control your life, no one else. Compared to the Manwha “Priest” that left a strong impact on me spiritually that you will not lose yourself completely due to pain and suffering, “Raqiya” just makes me want to punch someone in the face. 

But this is just how I feel about this manga; if anyone really wants a good interpretation of Gnosis, I’d really refer you to “Serial Experiments: Lain” which sticks to a similar plotline and follow through with it.

[catholic-character-tournament]

Round 2 - Resurrect Bracket (Losers Bracket) Side B

ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to [make it to the finals]

Propaganda below ⬇️

Kirei

He fucked up so many people's lives so badly in just one decade (not on purpose) that the universe put him in the summoning pool of all world influencing souls. He doesnt really have any special powers but he does serve as a vessel for rasputin at one point. He's the guy who says "people die when they are killed"

please please please there's literally a type moon character in the gif on the top of this form so it's typemoonphobic if none of them get in but it shouldn't be her it should be kirei bc he's 50x funnier & more iconic than jeanne. funny lil murder priest who's fucking THE gilgamesh (from the epic of) in the church basement and dies in a knife fight w a 17 year old whose dad he wanted to fuck back in '94 before realizing that he was actually kinda lame and he's been bitter abt it ever since. he has an orphan torture factory in his basement but he's also canonically good at being a priest. he's so funny you should def try his mapo tofu i swear it's totally safe for human consumption and not made with any california reapers. did i mention he's a deadbeat dad.

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Priest claims to be Pro Life to make Sakura Matou the most miserable girl on the planet, but he dies anyway.

bro became a catholic because he loves suffering

He’s a priest. Kind of. Not a very good priest obviously. There is something seriously wrong and fucked up with that man. It’s so entertaining.

he's gotta be one of the most insane catholic men ever with a very in-depth and interesting relationship with his religion and his relationship with god also he's the sexiest man ever to be conceptualized in the known universe and all of time

Will never forget the 40+ minute monologue in heavens feel being a thinly veiled metaphor for abortion

he wants to torment churchgoers and make them face their failures and suffering but all he ends up doing is motivate them to improve themselves. cringefail moment for him

he's absolutely insane. the coldhearted mercenary that barely reacts to anything is terrified of kirei. he's super fucked up. his ult in stay night is literally him channeling divine power into something called kyrie eleison. he's the vessel of rasputin (on account of being a priest with a huge....no i shant say) the biblical beast in grand order among other things. he gets drunk with and tops gilgamesh from the epic of gilgamesh in the church basement after gilgamesh from the epic of gilgamesh bats his eyes a little too hard at kirei in some of the horniest shot scenes ive ever seen. he also used to be a heretical "fixer" for the church, cleaning up scenes that would expose shit to the public. uhh what else. he holds cool swords between his fingers like a kid pretending to be wolverine but in my favorite route he just squares the hell up with the protagonist and they fight to the death outside planned parenthood

Friar Tuck

If you use the picture of furry friar tuck from the Disney Robin Hood, bless you 🙏

[awildhanmonster]

More Ado about Characters:

Alright, now for round 2!  The following characters are all more one-offs and have no direct relation to each other quite the same was as Nell/Leonora/Barnes do, so let’s see if I can keep this under novel length.  

Remy Green, aka Remy:  17 years old in current canon, and still in the last leg of high school, Remy is, for lack of any better term, a reverse werewolf: perpetually stuck in the form of a gangly wolfdog monster on all nights save the brightest of full moons.  Originally just a “normal” human kid just trying to survive through graduation, her entire life wound up turned on its head when an out of control werewolf attacked and bit her while out with friends one night.  He was subdued and arrested, even later charged for the negligence and violent assault, but the damage had been done and the virus passed on— in the worst ways.

Remy essentially suffered the equivalent of a severe allergic reaction and anaphylaxis during the first shift, which took hours (normal were shifts should be minutes) and resulted in her parents frantically driving her to the ER in tears.  She survived, though the diagnosis— for a fragile kid with shaky self esteem— was, at the time, seemingly a fate worse than death.  Despite her form, she never seems to suffer the loss of mindfulness or weakened inhibitions of most werefolk during “peak” moon periods.  

Remy has since started learning how to cope with life in a new form she didn’t really want or ask for, and she has the full, unwavering support of her parents, though it’s still a lot for a teenaged kid to handle.  I’m pretty sure she wound up being pulled from high school and is trying to finish out her last year and a half or so at home, though she could really use some friends she doesn’t think are “obligated” to love her like her parents are.  I think she’s pretty lonely and dealing with a lot of depression issues.  Luckily she’ll fall in with Wayne at some point, who’s like a sweet (greasy stoner) older brother, and he and the rest of the Losers can adopt the hell out of her as a little sister and teach her how to not give a fuck about what humans think when you’re a weirdo.  She’ll earn her happy ending eventually.  

Rose Lund:  Absolutely 100% a retooling/transplant of one of my dearest, most beloved, super shitty/earnest self-insert characters as a 12 year old on Neopets and I have NO SHAME AT ALL.  Rose is a human mage (they do exist!) around 30 or so, a pale/skinny English-Caucasian mutt with green eyes, straight brown hair, and a penchant for fancifully extra looking dyed bang fringies because she’s stopped giving a fuck.  She’s one of those rare people who can strike up a conversation with just about anyone, blessed by a very… unique way with words that’s unintentionally contributed to her internet fame as a slice of life blogger about the day to day trials of pet dragon (well, wyrm) ownership.  

Rose has been passionate about rare and magical exotic creatures since she was a wee girl, and developed an obsession with dragons (‘wyrms’ being the correct term for all non-sentient varieties) before she was out of grade school.  In college she double majored cryptobiology and spell artistry, then upon graduation, acquired a pair of rare pygmy wyrms— from temperate and tundra subspecies— respectively, as pets, both for personal reasons and to aid in her pursuit of a master’s degree in cryptobiological husbandy.

Pygmy wyrms, it should be noted, are generally terrible pets.  While only growing to approximately the size of a house cat (10-12 pounds on average) and sporting the appearance of beautifully miniaturized mythological six-limbed dragons any fantasy nut would fall in love with, they are far from domesticated, exasperatingly precocious, and have the charming habit of expelling flammable gas from a myriad of orifices when startled.  They have a distinctive, vaguely musky sulfurous smell about them regardless of cleanliness and are just clever enough to ignore training commands when convenient.  Imagine giving a very ornery, very clever raccoon flappy wings with a several foot wingspan, feeding it rotten eggs, and strapping a flamethrower to both ends, then rigging it all with an excitable hair trigger.  That is a pygmy wyrm.  Rose owns two in an apartment complex: Ice Pack (Packy), who is a pale milk white/ice blue, and Sharky (Sharkbite), who is black and burgundy/red.  

Needless to say they’re the loves of her lives and she revolves around them, having garnered a massive internet following thanks to her daily posts about their antics and the realities of exotic pet care.  They’re harness trained now and reasonably polite, though this is only due to years of hard work and constant reinforcement.  She hopes one day to breed more biddable specimens and help contribute to the conservation of the species worldwide.  Also, they’ve made her very good at anti-flammability hexes.  

Shun —: known only by her first name, a kitsune who moved into the apartment complex fairly recently with her pet pipe fox, Yuzu.  It should be noted that kitsune are particularly long lived among mythicals, though how long exactly that is tends to be hotly debated and unknown by all but the foxes themselves.  What is known is how they are extremely slow to age after reaching their peak maturity/fitness, with certain individuals reported over 500 years old and, apparently, showing very little of their age beyond a massive swath of grown tails (nine being the highest on known record).  Kitsune typically grow to around 30-40 lbs, outwardly resembling a much large. leggier, more willowy silhouette than traditional foxes, and will begin life with a single tail that splits or “buds” and multiplies over time.  

Neurologically they are fairly unique among mammals, possessing a kind of distributed intelligence throughout the body that can give the tails a “mind of their own”, so to speak, in much the same way as octopi or other related cephalopods do.  In fact, due to the extremely slow rate of cell death/turnover, a severed kitsune tail will continue to move and attempt “functioning” for weeks, even years by some reports, under correct conditions.  Which I’ll get into shortly.  

Swerving back to Shun herself, she’s an artist by trade who zigzags between traditional and digital freelance work for a living.  Conservation of mass is still in place for humanoid shifts— which all kitsune can voluntarily assume— with predictably small, delicate, androgynous bodies that rarely get above 4’5’’ or so in stature.  Features like pointed ears or slit pupils/exposed tails can be morphed or shown as desired, though the chronic perception of being childlike or “cute” regardless of how old they are is a pretty common occurrence.  Shun is no stranger to this either, and hates shopping for clothes at non-mythical-specific places because she has to do so in the *really* young children’s department for anything to fit.  

Back on the subject of pipe foxes, though— Shun is a kitsune with 3 and 3/4 tails.  She had an unspecified accident several years ago in which she lost the final quarter of her fourth tail, but managed to retrieve the piece after several weeks of searching, at which point it was already trying to become a pipe fox.  Pipe foxes (at least in this world) are the result of a severed kitsune tail’s survival instincts going horribly wrong (or right) and attempting to restructure themselves for survival, and the amount of tail there (i.e. how much was separated from the body) will determine what becomes of it, though the “starting” process is pretty identical no matter what you do.  

If a severed piece of tail has no food, eventually, with time, it will die.  If, however, you keep it somewhere safe (like a drawer) and you present it with food (which could be, I don’t know, a chicken leg), it will sense it, and you will see the start of a small, gaping fanged mouth begin to grow from the stump.  Once this has formed, the tail will wriggle itself to its prize and devour everything it can, sustaining it.  Keep feeding the tail and it will continue to grow legs, organs, features, and a face— though not necessarily in that order.  Eventually, you will have a small— usually mouse to rat sized— beautiful white magic fox, prized heavily by black market collectors for its splendor and apparent luck giving properties.  A true quarter-tailed pipe fox will live somewhere between 5-40 years, unpredictably.  The distributed intelligence of the tail will reform/conglomerate into a brain relatively on par with a modern pet dog, possibly smarter (or much dumber) depending on your luck.  

If, however, there is MORE than roughly a quarter tail chopped off, with more of the nervous tissue and mass intact, the pipe fox resulting may appear larger and more robust.  Many exotic buyers have been lured into purchasing these creatures from traders without realizing, and years later the unlucky recipient will find their precious fox’s skin suddenly flaccid on the ground like a shed cocoon, having erupted into 75 tinier pipe foxes that will summarily swarm the accessible property to spirit off with literally anything they decide is valuable, never to be found again, often raging like an infestation for days or WEEKS before vanishing forever.  

Rumor has it that feeding an entire severed tail will result in 75 tiny pipe foxes bursting forth from the cocoon shell that will each burst into 75 more bug sized foxes each, resulting in a plague of nigh biblical proportions.  But that’s never actually been confirmed on record.  

Needless to say the kitsune have a lot of protocols for dealing with severed tails and will usually destroy half-formed pipe foxes of unknown origin on the spot.  Shun keeps Yuzu as a pet due to being intimately aware of the little rat-sized creature’s origins, and she still had to sign SO many extra insurance papers and wavers before the complex would let her move in.  

I am not good at keeping it short, am I?  Wow.  Well, there you have it!  I’d be happy to answer any extra stuff I forgot too if someone has a question.  I do love these nerds.  

[ilovesamheughan]

I am feeling optimistic.

..

And why am I?  

Four years ago, things are different:

Sam and Caitriona were 4 years younger.

They maintained an openly friendly and fan-interactive SM media accounts.

They maintained an openly and perhaps, overly friendly public demeanour with each other.

They did not feel important enough that anyone would pay attention to their every word and action.

They have not experienced fans shipping them, not as Jamie and Claire, but shipping their real selves.

Caitriona was not (quite) in a relationship.

Sam’s relationships with the ladies were sadly limited to a few weeks to few months duration at a time; crushed and rebooted with a re-bound or turn-over after about the same period of time. Sigh.

The awareness of the charities they were involved with was just gaining momentum and support from fans.

They were such acting greenhorns.  

Four years later, things have shifted:

Sam and Caitriona are now 4 years older.

They now maintain a careful and limited fan-interactive SM media accounts.

They now maintain a friendly public demeanour with each other, guarded yes, but still supportive and respectful.  They are still friends.

They now attempt to conduct their every word and action with a new level of maturity while keeping peace and neutrality with everyone..

They have now fully experienced fans shipping their real selves and the initial harmless fun it promised to bring.  That was until such “harmless fun” was replaced by hate, insults, threats and stalking of their loved ones. I highlighted loved ones, as I personally feel that it is not their priority in life to worry how fans interact with each other or feel about their chosen loved ones.

Caitriona is now engaged to a Mr Tony McGill.

Sam’s almost 2 years relationship with Ms Mackenzie Mauzy has now endured distance plus gossips, hate, insults, threats and stalking.  Sigh.

The success of the awareness and support of the charities they are involved with are something to be proud of.

They are no long acting greenhorns. Their confidence in themselves have have blossomed, thanks to their Outlander exposure, and their acting prowess, dedication and hard work have given people, myself included, a renewed respect to the profession that is Acting.

This is THEM now, and where do we go from here?  

This is when I believe HOPE is going to be on the side of the GOOD. Sam’s (and perhaps Caitriona’s? I don’t follow her, so am not aware how she is going, but I guess most of the things I will say below will apply to her as well) popularity continues to climb.  Sam’s following continues to rise.  His charities continue to bring heartwarming results.  I am yet so witness a recession in numbers, Sam-wise.

And here is my point (I do have one), here on Tumblr, I am starting to see new followers who do not seem prone to get lost head-over-heels with obsession.  I see clever new followers.  Their GIF makings are not restricted to, but only includes sexual contents as part of the Outlander show and book discussions.  Proper discussions - NOT “Ok you two, kiss now!”  I now see art works that are just that, Art.  Their posts have outstanding Grammar and Comprehension. I’m adding correct use of Punctuation as well in the mix.   Not a single swear or filthy word utilised to describe their feelings or to explain themselves.  This kind of new followers and bloggers are just so refreshing. Who cares about a thousand fans whose every second word begins with f?  I’ll take 10 good hearted fans over the previously mentioned thousand. I would say Quality is better than Quantity.  Every time.

Why do I believe that things will be a-changing, then?

This is my own opinion and speaking for myself and myself only as I try never to be influenced by other people’s opinion, especially derogatory ones.  When I first joined the fandom, I saw Sam and his angelic face.  There is no avoiding that. But then there are so many angelic looking men in the acting profession and truth be told, most are a lot better looking than Sam and more sophisticated.  The Englishmen Fandom can boast of absolutely beautiful and talented and sophisticated actors born with silver spoons in the mouths.  It’s not their fault to be born that way.  They are all great guys and more power to them.  

Now, our Sam, he is a true diamond in the rough.  And a true diamond, no matter how much rough covers it, will always be bright and shiny and strong.

I hope, Sam’s new found self-confidence, maturity, stability and continued acting prowess  will be what will  bring the new breed of fans in. Gone is the flustered Sam, the introverted Sam, the girl chasing loser Sam.  The new fan, hopefully, will not dwell in 4-year old YouTube videos of flirty Sam, will question or at least not be easily swayed by click bait posts and sightings, will not engage in data mining of his family and loved ones and will not want Sam for themselves, in the biblical way.  

I hope the new breed of fan will see the truly talented actor that Sam is, the big-hearted man who help and inspire so much people to help themselves while fighting for those who are suffering a dreadful disease, the down-to-earth human being that he is now and what he can still be in the future.  

For me, an award-winning A-List actor has a lovely ring to it, absolutely, but a family man is just as sweet.  Perhaps even sweeter.  In my book.

This post is longer than I intended.  I have chores waiting for me.  And before anyone start pressing the Anon button to send me ill messages, (Ooooh, you’re a Sam mummie. YES, I am) know now that I have disabled those buttons.  Ha!

I really wish you all…

PEACE.

[themanicgalaxy]

SPN 6X3 The Third Man

heh after two and a half men, that's very funny

ooo I've heard this one is good

oh love the random cuts

HE IS PEELING OFF HIS SKIN

HE EXPLODED

THAT is HORRIFYING

ok cutting directly to the morning sex scene is interesting

ah he was dreaming

how's it like living in the impala again

sam does curls with Hot Woman, and Dean is sad and alone in an impala

can you tell who the main character was supposed to b-

ah ok o Sam paid? but he was hot enough?

what I'm getting from this is that Sam is also a loser

PENNSYLVANIA

Sam you Bastard

just lets the guy go because he's not going fast enough lol

ahahah the vodka

ohhh the cop is in some Shady Shit?

EW THE PUS

WHAT THE FUCK IS THE GORE IN THIS EPISODE

THE LIGHTING MAKES SHIT W O R S E

"because I lie professionally that's how" HAHAHA

AWW DAD DEAN

the fucking car competition

ah the liquid guy and the pus guy

solid to a liquid ha

THE PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE CAR RACES

dual getting out of the car is funny

we're the fed, ed

he's so bitchy

SAM WHAT THE FUCK MAN

KICK THE DOOR DOWN? WHAT?

mans is fucked

OH HE WAS INVOLVED?

oh boy

yeah uh ed is dead

no don't

OH GOD THERe'S BUGS IN HIS SKULL

biblical plagues huh

"bunch of dicks" yay the cop hate is back

YESSS THE CASTIEL SCENE

"feathery ass"

the lil smile awwww

"he's right behind me isn't he" AHAHAHAHAHA

I love this scene

his little GLARE

CASSSSSSSS

"that is still the term?" HAAHAHAH

Cas likes Dean better than Sam

HE DOESN'T REFUTE IT

and he backtracks, oh my god he backtracks

"What part of I Don't Know you're not getting" hehehehe

"you think I came because you called" yes THIS IS HILARIOUS

HE DEADASS JUST SAID MOSES ISN'T A SUSPECT AHAHA

"it's been chaos up there" :(

oh good that's a good premise, heaven is in chaos and Shit happens

my "people skills" are "rusty" the last "Year" YOU FUCKING DORK I LOVE YOU

heh Dean's convinced

aww they have to explain it to him

CAS JUST TELEPORTS I LOVE HIM

"cAS GIVE US SOME WARNING" AW

"what the hell kind of fed are you"

and celestial nap time

THE FUCKING TELEPORTATION

HE'S SO INTENSE ABOUT IT

Cas looks like he wants to kill someone

God didn't answer, the angel did

Cas is running the logic in his head

head tilt, bitch, actually trying

angels and souls huh

"more pieces, more product" helpful there

THE GOOFY ZOOM OUT TO SIGNIFY TELEPORTATION

SAM ASKS HIM ABOUT CAMP AND CAS GOES NO IDEA

Sam nods along to excruciating, Dean is Concerned

SOMEHOW DEAN IS THE SANE ONE HOW DID THIS HAPPEN

Can't care about the kid and torture

"don't have the luxury" o U CH

Seriously? nothing? SAM?

oooo one more garrison buddy

died in the war huh?

balthazar!

Raphael huh?

YEET

THEY ARE DEFINITELY DEAD

oh right angels

that car is so fucked

IT WAS SAM'S CAR

Dean is pleased

Cas: yes there's a whole war in heaven that's later

absolute no idea of pop culture :)

it's the Apocalypse! again!

myrrh? myRRH DER

he just Blips in and out

Secretive Angel Secrets yeah that traditionalist read of the angels tracks

ah Dean's blood

THE FIRE ALARM

"the police will take him home" CASTIEL

CAS IS VERY CONFUSED

CAS YOU KNOW WHAT A FROG IS

THE FROG IN THE THROAT EW

"Even I know that's a bad joke"

AW cas missed him

because I could

"you tore up the script" FREE WILL! INVETN! FREEWILL

he wants free will and the fighting will never stop

...I don't think...he's wrong actually

ah yes the stick up his ass

hE'S FUN WAIT

it's like men in black

wait hang on isn't he the dude from before

that sigil thing is so handy

"why won't any of you listen" :(

JESUS CHRIST NOOO CAS

HOW MANY TIMES DID GOD BRING HIM BACK LMAO THEY'RE SO PISSED

BALTHAZAR!!

LOT'S WIFE AHAHA

awww

ooo they got him

"the hairless ape has the floor"

:( but balthazar and cas

DID HE JUST SAY "in this economy"

aw and he just left

aCCURATE WENDIGO MASK FOR HALLOWEEN AHAHAH

"are you ok" YES GOOD HE NOTICED

there's something Off about him

"you know what hell does to YOU, it tortures you still does" oof

"you're stronger than me" oh good back to this

1. CAS! listen the idea of "I studied you to make sure ur good" and so he knows a bit vs this just Goofy ass Always moving frantic don't have time for references bastard is SO GOOD! HE'S SO FUNNY!

and the stick up his ass, yeah he started his process but it's in progress. on the other hand, all he wants is the fighting to Stop, which is commendable, and it keeps spiraling.

2. Balthazar. He's like "cool bro went out, and rewrote the script, so free will!" but as opposed to Cas's free will, his is just hedonism, it's just "Do Whatever!" because the apocalypse. also he clearly cares for Cas and that's just sweet.

3. the angels. the infighting, the figuring it out, all of that is so heartbreaking. like Cas adopted Gabriel's "please stop fighting," Balthazar just doesn't want anyone to die, like. They're so fucked as a family. like either god coming back or SOMETHING must help cuz this hurts.

4. Dean. I won't say he got old but he's tired. he's on a panic button, he's kinda alone because Cas and Sam are doing their own shit. This is...gonna be interesting hoo boy