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moomeecore · 4 months

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hey, i hope this isnt rude, but i value your thoughts on betty (and simon!) and i think about your various analytical pieces often.

so i hope this isnt too vague, but. ive been thinking about the ways betty and simon might differ from each other, specifically in the way they view...everything. do you think one of them has a 'sees the big picture but misses the small details' view and the other has a 'gets lost in the details, cant see the big picture' view? im not sure if they differ here, or if they are both the 'gets lost in the details' but going opposite ways...?

FINALLY getting around to awnsering this. i got sick so it took me even longer than i thought it would (had to wait until i could retain coherent thoughts)!!

Ok So, a lot of this is extrapolating (esp for betty) and goes very into more of a headcanons and Personal Interpretations area than a, like, canon analysis. in part bc the show dosen’t give us a ton of content of these characters (i mean, there’s plenty of simon content as ice king but im talking about pre and post ice king simon here). but yea im just gonna ramble. dont take this super seriously btw guys. again a lot of this is just personal Interpretation yknow

SO i think simon is definitely a “gets lost in the details guy”. at least like, overall. that man overanalyzes things until he goes into a state of paralysis and then he just passes out. in some ways he might better about this post being-freed-from-the-curse, on the basis of "had to survive the apocalypse by thinking on his feet", but also worse about it bc of the lasting impacts of having been ice king. because one of the Big Things about ice king is that he almost never thought anything through and just did things as soon as he thought of them. i think simon probably really wants to be Not Like Ice King and so might be scared of making choices too fast or acting too impulsive. i imagine he’s very worried about behaving like ice king and thats something thats in the back of his mind most of the time, impacting his confidence in his own choices & actions. but also f&c sorta shows that he has that issue of trauma responses causing him to have emotional outbursts and make quick decisions. so thats something to keep in mind.

i think he's, like stuck in a state of being scared to do things without thinking really hard abt them but then sometimes he does that and then he usually regrets it and feels really awful afterwards. not always guilty-awful even. f&c seems to show him feeling angry a lot. to me simon deals not just with guilt over being ice king or recovering from being ice king or Having strong reactions to things or making choices he regrets… but also with Anger At The Situation - a lot of feeling confused and not sure what to do and overwhelmed, i think . (i like that they let him be angry and frustrated, not just sad and depressed. i think this is very realistic to trauma related emotional responses)

the other thing abt simon is he tends to follow other people's lead on a lot of things. i think he just likes not having to deal with the pressure of making decisions. he seems more inclined to lead around f&c than around, like, finn, though. and betty. but i think that’s in part because he was taking on a protector role w them. but yeah. he does a lot of crazy shit in f&c but very noticeably does not really act as a lead decision maker. until they get to the vampire world and they get attacked for a second that man is yelling orders and breaking a chair over his knee and pulling out a pocket knife to carve it into a stake lighting fast. which i loved that. i loved that he gained so much confidence from being in Panic Mode when confronted w vampires Because those where something he had to deal with in the apocalypse when raising marcy. he had to know what to do for marcys sake. other than that tho he's usually making suggestions at most. and agreeing to do scary crazy shit lmao . EXCEPT he decides on his own in secret to try and contact golb . hehe (motivated by wants to see his wife)

(it also seems like when he feels more confident in something he's much more capable of making choices. (makes sense) he wasnt paralyzed by anxiety when going on that research expedition with betty, probably because he was literally getting a phd (or had a phd, the show was so weird abt that) in that subject. makes sense he knows what he's doing. and also is interesting bc in ep2 of fionna and cake when he goes on an Adventure with finn he's very scared and nervous, but then talks about how he "used to be quite the adventurer in [his] day", which fits into the theme f&c had w his character where he feels out of place and less confident bc his whole ass profession isn't really relevant anymore, and everything is so different from how it used to be. so yeah. current simon has even less self confidence and confidence in his own decision making than Back In The Day simon bc of that)

id like to say that…. i think that the fact that it took betty only a few years to summon and eldritch god to free simon from his curse meanwhile it took simon 12 years to get to the point where he kidnapped a guy to use in a summoning ritual to talk to betty is interesting. bc i really do think they both love each other, and are both obsessive and co dependent. but betty went off the deep end so fast, meanwhile simon took a lot longer to do something comparatively Less Evil for betty. i think that a lot of this is because simon is just less confident in his choices, more nervous about making decisions, and *slower* at making decisions. in part because of a obsessive focus on details (i also think a buncha other stuff contributed to the difference in how long it took betty vs simon to do differing levels of fucked up shit for eachother but Yeah that’s the relevant part.)

i wouldn't say betty is a "think about the big picture, ignore the details" person though, necessarily. maybe compared to simon she is, but she's still a huge fucking nerd. she's an academic! to me she's someone who takes issues and situations that are more subjective and translates them into concretely structured language in order to guide herself through what actions she should take (my friend responded to this with “so what youre saying is betty took a philosophy class and was like ‘aw yes! Math!’” and yeah that is exactly what im saying)

i feel like canon sort of implies this, and definitely doesn't Not Imply It, but i also think canon didn't flesh out her character very well, so in a lot of ways im making my own assertions. but i think she's the type of person who likes to view things in ways that are ....not necessarily less complicated, but more concrete? like she can handle an uber complicated math problem with ease, but the way a math problem is complicated is entirely different from the way a social interaction is complicated, you know. and she's way better equipped for the first one.

so, basically, i think betty would be like: Dosent see the bigger picture.... but in a different way from simon, where instead of getting caught up on and overwhelmed by all the little details, she picks a specific angle to view the situation and then focuses on That, often to the detriment of viewing things from a wider, more complex and nuanced perspective. so better at seeing the bigger picture than simon, but still can miss a Lot…

i also feel like she leans towards viewing things as "identify a problem/issue, then find away to eliminate it" and "identify a goal, and find a way to reach it" . like i feel like she'd tackle social and personal situations in this way. it's not like she can't do things for fun or anything, but like, if she upset simon she'd go into Solving A Problem Mode and be like: “The issue is Simon Is Upset. The goal is Make Simon Not Upset. First i have to identify Why simon is Upset, and then how to make him Not Upset. This is The Current Goal I Must Complete.” like, not in an abstract sense. like shes literally narrating that to herself. i think she likes to focus in on "what's wrong here and how do i fix it" as opposed to dwelling on emotions and exploring nuance. (which may be a contributor to how she ended up in that “there’s so little me left anymore” state by temple of mars: she was so focused on Fixing the Problem that she didn’t allow herself to really process her feelings too deeply and that took a toll on her mental health.)

simon is maybe more aware of nuance, which could be part of why he gets caught up on details because he's like "this CANT be properly categorized into something more straightforward, there's actually a billion TRILLION little details and that is stressful". like simon desperately wishes things could be simplified down more but is usually like "actually no, a million things are happening actually". he's like me he would get upset if asked to rate his pain or feelings on a number scale at the doctor (i can’t do that shit for the life of me. Those things are far too complicated to put on a number scale in my eyes). meanwhile betty just will force things into concrete categories and steps and factors that Make Sense To Her with intense fervor and if she starts to have a "this is too complicated to address" moment she feels threatened and then tries very hard to reprocess things in a way that is easier, or just does her best to ignore the things that make stuff too complicated to address

i think betty tends to view things in medium-sized chunks that incorporate some but Not All details in a situation, and that she cares about small details and being thorough but feels like accomplishing the goal is the most important thing, so is willing and able to make a quick decision if she feels it's the only choice. like. she had a limited time before the portal closed, and she chose to jump through it, because she thought "the problem is that im not with simon. simon is on the other side of the portal. ill go there" it's not that she doesn't like to think things through. she loves to think things through! its just that OVERALL she is a Doer who wants to solve the problem and thinks taking action and doing something is way better than sitting there and missing an opportunity. betty will think through the details if she has time, but if she doesnt, she just breaks things down into whatever is most easy to digest and process, and then takes the option that seems.like it will get the most desired outcome based on the available info. and also shes just very confident and headstrong. and THATS. why she punched bella noche

In my eyes betty likes having rules and defined, structured processes about what to do or how to deal with stuff. and she dosen’t really like changing those. she's very autistic. she hates change i think. so does simon. but i think that simon would be more likely to be like: the change in situation is so upsetting that it's making it harder to think and process things, so he just gets overwhelmed and has an even harder time addressing whatever is happening or comprehending it. meanwhile betty is quick to try and find the easiest way to rerout her thinking to fit the new change, she's just really fucking pissed off and stressed out about it (part of this to me is she hates feeling powerless & hates feeling like she might fail). she copes with changes in her surroundings by finding a way to connect the changed situation as well and as fast as possible with her pre existing methods of tackling situations. i think bettys also worse at handling changes in people than changes in situation. to quote my friend when we where texting about this “Situations dont have feelings”.

Like. Betty has so many skills. so much knowledge. but isn’t great with people. And she gets to know people and figures out how to understand them and then THEY CHANGE??? ILLEGAL. and so… like…this is literally her whole thing with simon!! elements seems to imply that betty originally views things as "simon is cursed, i have to fix the curse". but when she makes an attempt to meet simon where he’s at and try to interact with him as ice king, she is unable to handle it. she is upset that he is different, so much so that she concludes the only way to view things is to see them as separate people, even though it was implied that she wasn't doing that before! she was approaching it like he was Simon With Memory Loss…..but then she does her villain betrayal scene and now she's all "things will be back to just me and simon, and you won't exist" . meaning before she directly started interacting with him, she was able to view him as simon, but when she did interact with him for an extended period of time and found out how different he had become, she felt so threatened by this that the only way she could handle it was by switching her view in order to not have to confront the idea that simon could have changed that much. it also meant switching her view to a place where she would be okay hurting simon. but when he starts to protest, get upset, ask what's wrong, and worst of all, insist that he's worthy of respect, that starts to stress her out and she has to talk out loud to herself to reassure herself that she's doing the right thing

and in that scene simon goes "i don't know who this simon guy is, im ice king", which i think is a Big line - he's responded to simon in the past, but doesnt always. Like. he's inconsistent in whether or not he's aware that's a way of referring to him, which makes sense bc he seems to have memory lapses where he remembers things fine one minute and forgets them the next, them remembers about them way later. anyway having him say that simultaneously provides a Confirmation of bettys new perspective, but it also… isn’t meant to. i feel like, to the audience, its saying that "simon has changed so much, he's entirely different now. and this is the way things are, and betty should accept this, but she cant" . to betty its telling her she’s right, but that kind of sucks, because she’s not totally sure how much she wants to be right (she dosen’t want this to be simon, but she also dosen’t want simon to be gone)

(i think the idea of betty Swapping her perspective abt simon during elements as a coping strategy to deal w the panic of What If Simon Is Different + the moral dilemma of potentially hurting him fits nicely into the "betty has bpd" interpretation . my girl is splitting)

(also ik many people interpret simon and ice king as Literally being entirely different people but tbh i think that is way less interesting and doesn't make a lot of sense with the canon. but also ik this is partially because what people consider to be "different people" is subjective. like it depends somewhat on ur perception of identity and stuff. also having different interpretations is valid and fair and all that - and adventure time is often very loose in its text and there’s lots of ways to interpret it. but whatever man im just saying my feelings and That is and Always Will Be the Same guy to me and i think that perspective is waay more interesting to explore than simon getting possessed by an alternate personality or whatever. so im just going under that interpretation….. i think some ppl would perceive the "im ice king" line as being a conformation of them as separate people but to me it's a more abstract representation of the idea that a Drastic Change has taken place that Cannot be reversed!!.... which. Ok eventually it is but tbh i doubt they even knew how they'd end the show by this point and i still think in the context of elements it still works very well as a way driving home both how betty is Not Handling the Situation Well while also making you empathize with her bc u also know how hard that must have been for her to hear)

i think betty is very person-oriented in a unique way!!she's codependent while also being low empathy, introverted, and in many ways socially inept, which is an interesting combo! i really get the vibe that she has always struggled socially and had trouble fitting in, so attaches really heavily to people who she does feel a connection to, and works really, really hard to maintain the relationships she has. i like to think she’s scared of rejection…

i think simon is much more empathetic, emotion-driven, and in tune with others than betty, but i also think he can be Very bad at actually understanding other people on many levels - like with his obliviousness to betty being interested in him romantically until she spelled it out for him, or to the impact of bettys earlier sacrifices. simon also, with the mission to get the crown in f&c, despite his empathetic nature and love for his friends, does not seem to consider that putting the crown on would upset his friends. This shows a "focusing on one thing and missing something else" scenario, and perhaps more of a "thinking abt the big picture" (saving f&c's world) over the details (friends would be sad) thing. so that's interesting. (although i think part of this example in particular stems from his self hatred preventing him from really thinking that his friends would be upset if he did that. but in a sense it is focusing on big picture over details). So theres some nuance there i think

BUT Anyway, i think this issue probably is mainly with him struggling to read people, or fully understand others perspectives, despite caring deeply about people and feeling Upset when he can tell other people are Upset. he cares and he feels very emotionally connected to people, especially people he cares about…. he just isn't that great at picking up on things sometimes. (also. Worth noting, i think its def shown that while simon may be very caring towards his friends and is a generally nice and approachable, well meaning person who wants whats best for other people. He still is very capable of Hating People and Doing Bad Things On Purpose. Don’t want to ignore that. also hes very desensitized to bad things happening in many respects lmao. So its not like hes just always super nice and caring and amazing. He still murdered choose goose to death and That is via the power of choose goose being annoying and Simon Loving Betty)

Betty also struggles to understand other people but instead of being downright oblivious to certain things or being unsure and nervous she finds relating to people and understanding their actions and emotions to be actively difficult and makes an active effort to understand people in a bit of a scientist-looking-at-a-subject way. Which can be helpful sometimes and less helpful other times. like. it's good that she has a way to navigate social interactions . but also that way of addressing things isn't always conductive to a healthy relationship, especially when she doesn't really let simon in on the fact that she's making these sort of analyses where she's like "what will maximize Simon Being Happy and how do i accomplish this" sometimes to her own detriment. simon is just like "wow betty is so confident and good at knowing what she wants" meanwhile betty is like "i will make the best choice For Simon" betty i think is better than simon at reading people but not good at Empathizing With Others Emotions or really Understanding or relating to the emotions behind their actions .

she also is shown to, despite caring So much about simon, not be very considerate or caring towards others (not the same as being low empathy & etc dw im not equating them. Its just on the topic of How She Views Others!!!). To be fair, we don’t see nearly enough of her interacting with people besides simon, but i like to think that she just sorta struggles to really care about and have compassion for Random People but deeply cares about those she is Really close too (but as far as we know, thats just simon)

OVERALLi think they see the world very similarly in some ways and very differently in others and it's an interesting balance. also they are both Autistic. In cconclusion !!

betty

likes to break things down into concrete concepts because she struggles to comprehend more subjective and nuanced experiences, especially in social situations + Feels more comfortable approaching things from a “scientific” perspective because it is familiar and easy for her to navigate; threatened by uncertainty and comforted by things that are more straightforward and well-defined

doesn't dwell on things a ton (esp not as much as simon) because she's very goal-oriented and focused on the Now. she wants to get to the next step. that often then means ignoring Her Own Feelings Or Needs if she deems Other Things to be more relevant or important than them (not good for your mental health) + this also means she’s better at making quick decisions! she cares about details and prefers to have All The Relevant Info but is willing and able to cut things down to a “wider-picture” that helps her make whatever choices will help her achieve her goal - that wider picture just may not always be the Full Actual wider picture.

struggles to put herself in other people's shoes - finds it easier to view herself as an outside party with the goal of achieving the ideal outcome in a social situation. In general has low empathy and struggles to understand/relate to others feelings, which impacts her perspective on things and how she handles/views situations.

(not really mentioned earlier but idk where else to put it:) i also think she has that Autism Trait where you focus in on a specific goal you want to achieve and struggle to focus on anything else until it's accomplished (and that that sort of thinking pattern happened with curing simons curse). where you put off doing anything, even things you could do, until something that you Need to happen (according to your brain, not the real world) happens. Betty put off being person until simon was saved. she put Everything on hold until she accomplished her mission. and this is in a way a form of not seeing the bigger picture, because its overly focusing on a specific thing at the expense of others

(bettys better at balancing seeing the details & the big picture in a sense, but more like. she picks a medium sized chunk of what is going on and focuses on that and acknowledges details when able to but is willing and able to make split second decisions based on little info and is confident in doing so. but whereas i think simon might have more of a "sees the whole big picture but then gets caught up on the details" thing going on, i think betty just straight up focuses on One Portion of something, of varying sizes, which could or could not he considered a "detail", but then almost completely ignores everything else, viewing things as individual challenges or events that need to be addressed before anything else can be)

simon

is someone who really likes to think things through, and can easily get hung up on details and can easily get overwhelmed by those details and sent into a state of anxiety-fueled-spiraling or decision making paralysis

this is worse probably for Current simon because he’s also Trying To DIstance Himself from his identity as ice king, and as ice king he had no impulse control and thought things through very little. so simon likely puts even more pressure on himself to think things through! unfortunately hes also Going Through A Lot Emotionally and sometimes that’s too much and he Dosen’t think things through and just acts on how he’s feeling. And that makes him feel Worse about himself and just Everything in general

he is more confident with his decision making skills if he feels more prepared/knowledgeable on the subject at hand or is taking on a caretaker role (like with marcy, or f&c). but currently he dosen’t have a lot of that going on so that kinda sucks for his self confidence.

simon is better at empathizing with people than betty & at creating connections with others & is more caring towards people he dosen’t know that well - and so may consider Other People more in his perspectives on things. But on the other hand hes not always the best at reading people or understanding their perspectives, even if he feels emotional connections and cares about people, so he can easily overlook other people’s struggles or perspectives within an issue - even if he cares deeply about their wellbeing (very relevant to his relationship with betty)

he’s generally more emotion driven than betty, and dwells on & ruminates about his feelings, sometimes to the point of obscuring his understanding of a situation or his ability to engage with it. On The Other Hand this means he at least acknowledges how he’s feeling meanwhile betty is like “im classifying that as irrelevant information until further notice” lmao.

he’s better at understanding nuance & subjectivity than betty but this contributes to his habit of getting-overwhelmed by everything & Overthinking

(simon focuses on details over the big picture overall. he easily gets caught up in details and panics. he traps himself in cycles of worrying about details that can paralyze him when making decisions, and so prefers to not have to make choices. BUT simons "paralyzed with fear of making decisions" state can often be overturned by the power of Having Strong Emotions and his decisions may be Less Good because of the power of not being great and understanding other people. he's very emotion-driven and currently suffering from a billion mental health issues so sometimes all that gets in the way of his natural over-thinking. hes got a better understanding of nuance than betty & is better at Empathizing with others and more considerate but not all too great at reading them or recognizing others Feelings or Behaviors)

I THINK I REPEATED A LOT IN THIS. AGAIN, KIND OF JUST RAMBLING. HOPEFULLY IT WAS SOMEWHAT COHERENT

#text #asks

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eviebyme · 2 years

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hey 🙃

I saw that you are taking requests, I was wondering if you could write a skz reaction to their partner being a rocker/metalhead? 💚

Hi there ☺️❣️Thanks for your request - I love it!

Stray Kids Reaction to their Partner Being a Rocker/Metalhead

Chan

Pleasantly surprised

Chan is the type to love all your quirks and unique characteristics. He loves that you are passionate about music, even if it is not his preference. Since he is constantly on the lookout for new music recommendations he will ask you to make him a playlist of your favorite songs. Even if he cannot appreciate rock/metal music he will be very considerate and try to understand why your a fan. He’ll even be your concert buddy!

Minho

Impressed

Just when he thought he had you all figured out - he discovers your metalhead side. He would love to uncover everything about you, and your love of rock music is a new layer for him to discover. If this side is more obvious, then he will be intially very attracted to your edginess (he loves the thought of a badass partner). He likes the rocker style and might even have a hidden metalhead within him.

Changbin

Confused

He just doesn't get it. Changbin tries his best to listen to every song on the playlist you made for him, but he just doesn't understand how this type of music is enjoyable. If you take him to a concert he will be even more perplexed by the people around him thrashing around to the music. It's just not his scene, so whenever you talk about it he just smiles and nods.

Hyunjin

Intimidated

The whole rocker/metalhead culture really unnerves him. He has his own thoughts and opinions about people with piercings and/or tattoos, and he would be worried about you being a part of that scene. If you have tattoos or piercings he will think you’re a bad ass and tough as nails (even if you’re not, he just associates the music with an edgy look and being badass). Whenever you play music out loud he feels as if the mood is ruined, so he usually takes control of the music in the car.

Jisung

Curious

Jisung also doesn't get it. But he wants to! He figures that is it something you like, then it has to have some sort of meaning - especially since he likes you and wants to understand you. Han will listen to your favorite songs and will remember your favorite bands so he can buy you some merch as gifts. He’ll want to know all of your favorite things, as an effort to get close to you.

Felix

Supportive

If he sees you're really into rock/metal that he will stand back and let you do your thing. He knows that he is not a fan, but he would never say anything negative about it. In fact, he’ll listen to you when you’re excited about a new album and even accompany you to a fan sign. You’ll never feel any judgement from him, but he will never go to a concert (unless you couldn’t find anyone and did some master convincing).

Seungmin

Concerned

Seungmin is the type to overanalyze the lyrics and ask you if you're okay if you're listening to a hardcore song. Also, he worries about your ears if you're listening to music too loud and your neck when you’re head banging. Even if you explain that he doesn’t need to have a deep conversation with you every time you play a song, he will always be concerned about the subject matter of the music you listen to.

Jeongin

Enthusiastic

He loves new experiences and will be excited when you open a new type of music to him. High energy concerts are fun for him, and even if he can’t get into the music, he’ll enjoy himself. He’ll tag along with you to concerts and will love headbanging in the car when it’s just the two of you. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was a lowkey rocker himself.

🌟Requests Open🌟

✨Masterlist✨

#stray kids #stray kids drabbles #stray kids imagines #stray kids reactions #stray kids astrology #stray kids preferences #bang chan #minho #lee know #changbin #han jisung #jisung #felix #hyunjin #seungmin #jeongin

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pattersplash99 · 1 year

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Super hero prompts! #1

Hero was so normal about this.

Hero was a very normal hero, with a very normal fan base and a very normal power and they could remain normal about this situation right here in front of them.

It... It wasn't exactly a surprise. Hero has always been incredibly capable, how else would they have sped through the training program and earning their license despite the suddenness of their choice?

(I mean... Having a "motivation" probably helped but even then it's still impressive.)

But back on topic. Hero has had a nice career of being a normal if skilled hero and they can remain normal in even the most chaotic situations.

They can be normal about this.

...

They can be! Don't give me that look.

They can be normal about this.

....

-Someone help why can't they be normal about this.

This is not how they thought this would go, they were expecting since sort of secret high tech lair and an epic confrontation! Not this.

Not a messy and cluttered one bedroom apartment and...

And Villain. Passed out on the couch.

They were... Concerned, let's go with, when they found them passed out in costume, window left open behind them. Hero had honestly only barely passed first aid with a makeup project done hurriedly in the last few weeks and they were not confident that would be reliable if Villain was injured.

Luckily, it seemed they were fine, if a little bruised. Just tired.

But that leaves Hero freaking out about how to react to this discovery.

Backtrack? How did I get here? Why did this happen?

Better then panicking they guess. Sure, let's do that.

Wait but did this start Wednesday or this Morning? Cause technically this all started with-

Focus, Hero! Focus. Relevant recaps only.

Hero was relatively skilled at tracking. Or- well maybe it's defined as locating? Idk, they're good at overanalyzing crumbs of information and finding guesses of people's locations. Wish they could say Hero training thought them but really it's a skill from childhood. Don't worry about it.

(They are not a clingy friend, don't listen to a word BFF says.)

Regardless, it's very handy for their career of choice. They're relatively freelance for a Hero so it's not like it's too time consuming and often it's led to many a capture. They even earned a small reputation.

But, you see, Hero's gotten themself a rival of sorts. Villain has been around a little longer then Hero and has forged a reputation of being sneaky and slippery. Hero want afraid to challenge that once they got through schooling and they've been a recurring encounter ever since.

But Hero has been bored lately. There's no big drug rings or fights in the street or anything.

So they thought they'd see if they could.

Find Villains lair, that is.

They narrowed it down to a few and was planning on leaving it at that but...

Unfortunately they have a best friend they share everything with.

(Yes this all started because of a dare. Wh- I'm not stubborn you're stubborn.)

Enough rambling. They just recapped everything and it still explains nothing.

Why is Villain using what's supposedly their CIVILIAN APARTMENT as a secret lair?! How has no one managed to catch them yet? All Hero had to do was walk in here! There wasn't even an alarm system.

Their eyes catch the closed door of the bedroom.

...A peek couldn't hurt, right?

Snooping around their rivals apartment seems like a much better thing to figure on then trying to figure out what to do. Everyone gets curious and after the mental tax this has been, they deserve the compensation.

It's normal to take time to sort out your thoughts. They're very much being normal about this.

(They ignore the tiny voice saying the normal reaction would have been alerting the hero corp to Villain's location. Or tying Villain up while they were vulnerable.)

They're being normal about this.

They open the door to a small and crowded room that clearly isn't big enough. Though whether that's the fault of the room or the immense collection of metal and electronic parts scattered around is anyone's guess.

The furniture's been shoved to one side, so as to have floor space for inventing. Hero hardly needs to take another glance around the room to realise that probably didn't last long, what with the unopened Ikea shelving box laid on the bed just as covered in parts as everywhere else.

It's a mess. Hero knew Villain had a knack for trinkets and inventions that were a little unorthodox, but they had kind of imagined a more impressive lab-

This is the lab. This mess of a room that's very floor is a walking hazard is where all of Villains crazy weapons are made.

Is this apartment really all Villain has to practice villainy in? This tiny, two-room and a bath room with the smallest shower known to man apartment that hardly fits one person?

They can't believe that the reason they became a hero is using this as their base of operations.

Hero makes a noise that's somewhere between a sigh and a groan. Curse BFF for daring them to actually check. How are they ever supposed to take Villain seriously again?

(This is why you don't suddenly change your entire plan for the future for the chance to interact more with someone cool. The more you learn the more that illusion wears off.)

This is not helping them with their effort to have normal thoughts.

They shut the door and return to the living room/kitchen/ main room so small it doesn't even have room for a dining table.

Their eyes drift to their rival, noting the fluffy hair escaping their hood. It's that brown-blonde color. You know, the one that's like blonde but if it was on a brown color scale? It tumbles from it's hiding place and obscures the side of Villains face, fluttering slightly with their slight exhales, catching on the edge of their mask. Villain shifts slightly, and Hero can feel their mask digging into their skin.

Hero grimaces in sympathy. They wonder for a moment why Villain didn't take their mask off, but honestly they're more grateful about that fact. This has been enough of a emotional rollercoaster, don't need to add unintentional exposure of someone's identity to that weight.

It's funny, what originally drew Hero to them was their sharp edges, how they never let their guard down and never grew cocky yet still had this air off confidence. And yet the sight in front of them can't be described as anything other then soft and vulnerable.

Hero doesn't mind it though.

(they're honestly unsure which side they like more.)

They pause, before an exasperated sigh escapes them.

So much for being normal about this.

They glare at Villain half-heartedly. Well, if they can't be normal about Villain, then Hero's decided they're going to be not normal in a way that could almost be normal if in different context.

They pull a blanket up over Villain, before looking at the counter.

Well, if no one else is going to do it, might as well tidy this place up.

Cleaning's always been a productive way to pass time anyway.

And what else are they supposed to do, take a seat and wait? No way.

#writing #heroes and villains #hero x villain #superhero #train of thought #writblr #snippet #how do tags work #i wrote something #wrote this instead of sleeping

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tame-a-messenger · 7 months

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This is gonna be a long post, sorry in advance.

So lately I’ve been noticing Damien getting a lot of hate and being called annoying in videos. I know not everyone will like him but I just wish people didn’t give him a hard time making him seem like the outcast in the group (including the cast.) I just feel that he has a particular sense of humor a lot of people may not understand but calling him all those names is very uncalled for. I also wish that whenever he’s in videos, the other cast can actually acknowledge him and not treat him so awkwardly. This may be a stretch but I feel like when he was just known as “Shayne’s best friend,” everyone treated him a lot better than now when he found his personality and humor that he enjoys. And with this post I do not mean to seem like I’m dissing the cast members or fans, I just want them to appreciate him at least just a little bit. Not to overanalyze but you can also see when he makes some jokes he gets a little sad whenever no one reacts to them and he even stops his jokes midway because of the lack of reaction as well. That’s probably why fans don’t respect him as much because I feel like everyone likes a joke 10x when other people laugh so if no one acknowledges Damien then fans won’t think he’s funny neither. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not asking for everyone to “baby” him but it would be nice for him to be treated like he’s actually worth something.

Again I’m sorry for the rant, I just wanted to get this off my chest because it’s been racking my brain for a bit 😕

Don't be sorry! if there's ANYWHERE to rant about either Damangela party it'd be here! (I appreciate the level headedness Anon <3) (now get ready for my rant lol <3)

I personally haven't been seeing these hate comments, but I don't doubt they are there. Damien has always had people not liking him. I remember when he first joined there were so. many. comments about how "He's so awkward" "he just isn't funny" "this guys weird just fire him" "we don't want to see this guy" so on so forth. (something, something, neurotypicals know before you know you're divergent) It was really sad.. I thought he was a little awkward but I didn't DISLIKE him for it.

"I also wish that whenever he’s in videos, the other cast can actually acknowledge him and not treat him so awkwardly."

I notice this too.. I don't think they are trying to be mean, just the opposite actually, I think they don't want to be too much to him so they end up being too quiet? and end up ignoring him because he makes THEM nervous? that's what I see at least.

They don't know how to interact with him because, (a tip I had to learn the hard way) if YOU apologize a lot, people tend to think everything THEY do is wrong from your perspective. Because the 'social que' for subtly letting someone else know what makes you uncomfortable is to apologize to THEM for that thing so they get the hint not to do the thing YOU apologized for.

"I'm SO SORRY for scratching my ass in front of you! that's SO GROSS" = if we read between the lines, they are letting me know they think it's gross if I scratched MY ass in front of THEM (which duh, but I needed a scenario and this was the first thing to come to mind lol)

Going back to what I was talking about, Damien has always had a apologizing problem, which in turn makes everyone else nervous they'll hurt his feelings (even though the 'over apologizing' probably comes from not wanting other people to feel uncomfortable/trying to head off arguments and NOT hurt others feelings) it's a hurt-hurt scenario...

Let me just gush about Ang for a sec >

Angela is the only one (other than Amanda and maybe Shayne) that does an ABSOLUTELY AMAZING JOB at heading off his over-apologizing. He still try's it with her but she just shrugs it off, WHICH IS THE CORRECT RESPONSE !! she's showing him not to apologize to her, she knows what he means, there's no reason to do all that. She'll always be his friend and WILL let him know if she didn't like something he did. (as a fellow neuro spicy, ANGELA'S WAY OF COMMUNICATING IS SO NICE. No bullshit, just love.)

Which is why I like them in videos so much! He understands she doesn't need to be apologized to all the time so he can chill. And she makes space for him to make jokes openly (and actually be heard)

<Back to your ask,

I think it sucks as well, I wish HR could have a sit down with the whole cast and explain pretty much what I said so they can be more comfortable. But there's life I guess. Don't always get what's best. c'est la vie

With the comments- I think a lot of them are probably kids that don't know what they're doing, and just being mean because of hormones, (or just assholes) nothing can really be done sadly...

I just want those that do love and appreciate him show him love and make sure he's healthy and happy <3

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stupendousfoxthing · 7 months

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It always thrills me when I find TKKRs who have been here for years. I have so many questions 😆 maybe I will start with their 2017 Festa "footsies". Was it big back then? Did people talk about it a lot? Or is it just overanalyzed now? I feel tho that there definitely was a lot of flirting going on to the point one got (I don't know how to say it without being too explicit or disrespectful) maybe "excited"?

That was and still is a huge TK pillar for me along with Smart Event. They definitely were attracted with eo in THAT way. When I first got into TK space, Smart Event and Festa 2017 cemented my observation that the physical attraction was super present. I just didn't know how deep their feelings were for eo. The feelings and believing they love eo part went the opposite way for me, I noticed it in the minute details they do for eo and their visceral response (that's something you can't train yourself no matter how great of an actor you are).

Yessssss, I still have a handful of Taekooker friends who I have known for years and are still very much Taekooking. I remember the "footsies", but it wasn't really a big deal in my circle. Some specific 2017 moments that I do remember being big for me: The whole Chile concert incident and how attentive Tae was to JK when he was clearly not doing well. I think a lot of the sign language moments are overblown but the "I love you" during the Chile concert is undeniable and so significant to me. I also think the search for "ghost" sounds in the background of lives is way overblown and overanalyzed as well, but I definitely hear someone in the background of Tae's live soon after that concert and I do believe it was Jungkook. Bon Voyage S2 and the conversation between Taekook in the background that got picked up by mics but was not subtitled where Taekook are talking about moving to Hawaii to live together. kookvbot (the K-Taekooker who heard the convo, boosted it, and translated it) is a legend and we miss her dearly. "Private conversation" Hello, this day was WILD. The way Tae said it, Jungkook's reaction his jaw literally dropping, Jimin ducking into view of the camera and making kissing sounds. What the hell was going on there. The video from the backstage of AMAs (their first performance on a American television omg) that caught Jungkook pushing past everyone on the stairs to get to Tae's side and mayyyyyybe possibly hold hands with him while they walked together. The attraction has been clear for a long time. I still don't have a definitive timeline of when and how things shifted in their relationship, but I have a rough outline. I think 2017 was likely a transitional year. I know it has been a big part of some people trying to convince themselves solo era doesn't mean anything by saying Taekookers had nothing before that, but they're wrong about that just like they're wrong about a lot of things. Solo era is my favorite time to be a Taekooker so far, but there was PLENTY going on over the previous years.

#asks #taekook

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cheeto-flavoured-pasta · 6 months

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I’m chatting with a friend over some cookies-and-cream flavored Pocky sticks when a crumb drops onto their leg. They pick it up and eat it anyway, mumbling about how it always happens. I agree, saying it’s kind of annoying, because I have to sit there and debate whether it’s socially acceptable for me to pick the crumb off my leg and eat it or if I’ll look like a disgusting freak to any onlookers. Then they give me this kinda weird look, one I know really well — scrunched eyes, furrowed brows, a nose tipped in confusion. The kind that says, there’s a person out here who thinks like that?

“So? Who cares?” They shrug.

I think about that more than I should, to be honest. Maybe I’m overanalyzing, but in that moment where they were questioning me — questioning why anyone would be so hyper-vigilant about such a trivial thing — I… just think I happened to realize. Fuck, that’s not normal. And the more I look back and move on with life, the more I notice it. The panic that sets in when I’m in public and drop something by accident. The constant anticipation of waiting for someone to make a snide comment when I slip up — and the eerie feeling in my throat when nobody does. It’s almost like no one actually cares. Almost. Did you really think I’d believe that fully? Don’t get ahead of yourself; I’m not that mentally stable.

It’s fucking strange. I could be dabbing up a bit of water in the kitchen and right as I head to the garbage can, I pause. Grandma used to lose her shit if I ruined a perfectly good paper towel — and, by her definition, this was still clean because it was just a couple drops of water. How could I be so wasteful? Do resources not mean anything to me? Am I so unconcerned with the finiteness of the universe?

Anyone else would turn their nose up in disgust if I just left the paper towel there, right? Even if it was just a smidge of water, it was still wet and slimy and gross and no good to keep around. I’ve stared at the garbage can for several seconds now, almost half a minute, and the kitchen’s gone quiet. Wait, no — the kitchen’s been quiet, actually. There’s nobody here except for me. Whatever I do, who’s going to give a shit? Certainly not the couch or dish rack. The feeling doesn’t relieve me though. Without anyone to judge me, to dictate what I do to every single last second… I feel a little too free. A little too lost. Even though that’s what I’ve wanted to be — free, from judgement, from people’s constant nitpicking that had worked its way like needles into the flesh of my brain — it doesn’t feel right.

I forget what I do with the paper towel and go on with my day. Next thing I know, I take three seconds too long to find a cup lid, or a pair of scissors, or I fumble with a dice as it slips between my fingertips. The embarrassment is stronger than usual, but it fades now that no one is here to judge. The fading isn’t any better, because it leaves me with this sense of emptiness and tension that holds taut like a string wrapped around something twice its size.

I wonder if I should tell all this to my friend. The tension, the knee-jerk reactions, the constant worries of what the imaginary people in my head and in my room will say. And I think I already know how they’ll reply if I do tell them. They won’t say it in bad faith or malice, but just… concern. No judgement, for once, just concern.

“Dude, I think you might have a problem.”

#are you ready for another bad poem?#(Pretend I sang that in my best Patrick Stump impression)#hey that should be my tag for these pieces #Just so I can compartmentalize them under one tag #anywho-#I started writing this one like a month ago when I felt like shit and I only finished it today #Pasta try to finish a prose poetry piece in one sitting challenge (impossible)#writeblr #prose poetry #poem #prose #writing community #writers of tumblr

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catgirl-catboy · 1 year

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I don't think total drama's writing is bad just when it comes to ships this fandom is a mess, they still argue Duncney vs Gwuncan like rabid dogs

Total drama Z? I never heard the new season I'm a total dingus, I will watch it

And I read you like Tenko -my bi queen- can I take a Tenko analysis before I go watch total drama Z?

And well I guess we quite get along well, I'm happy about it. Autistic to autistic communication ig? Lol

Yesss! A fellow Bi Tenko headcanoner! I am pro headcanon whatever the fuck you want, but the fact that lesbian Tenko is the popular headcanon disappoints me because it is the most shallow way to read Tenko. "She hates men because she's a lesbian" is boring. I want to hypothesize a different explanation, because why take her at her word when you can overanalyze her so much. It got long, so I put it under a readmore. By long, I mean 2000 words. Honestly, I might crosspost this to ao3 later, since I legit love this.

The love hotel is dubiously canon at best, but ideas from it are shown in her FTEs and character development in chapter three, so I do think it works for me. That being said, if you are part of the fans that hate it I do get why.

Elephant in the room for a lot of my thoughts on Tenko... I think she was abused by her master. I actually have a lot more evidence than the Kiyo was a victim of abuse headcanon, which I also subscribe to!

She shows a lot of symptoms of abuse that were played for laughs. In her intro we get the line:

"If any degenerate tries to touch me, my reflex is to grab them and throw them across the room."

That could just be because shes an Aikido master, but it paints a very disturbing picture with the rest of the context.

In her first FTE with Kaede, we get the line "Master told me degenerate males always have perverted fantasies running through their heads!"

So her master is intentionally telling her bad things about men. He must know about her sexism. He probably even encourages it!

In the same FTE, when she talks about attacking Shuichi, she describes it as "pre-emptive self-defense" small problem, wouldn't it be pre-emptive defense of others? It was brought up in the context of protecting Kaede. Honestly, I really wish I knew Japanese so I could see the original text for this line.

I don't think it was the first time she used this logic/excuse.

There's Tenko's repeated insistence to Kaede that she doesn't consider herself cute reeks of low self esteem. If her Aikido master was like a surrogate parent to her, shouldn't he have caught on to this negative self talk? Should he have told her she was cute, since she's basically his daughter.

If you tell her that her passion is her secret weapon, we get the line "My passionate energy, huh? I have been told that it gives people headaches!" Her parents haven't been in the picture from a young age, so who would be telling her this?

Onto Shuichi's FTEs, we get this line after Tenko attempts to provoke him by growling. "Give me a reaction already! I don't know what else to do!" She acts out for attention, and will thrive on negative attention and positive attention all the same. Remember that. Its not related to my Tenko abuse theory/headcanon, but its interesting that someone who thrives off other's reactions to her falls for the least emotive character.

(I don't think she's as oblivious with Himiko as she wants us to think. I think, on some level, she knows.)

This next bit of dialogue is a reach even for my standards, but its fun to think about.

Tenko: I am calm! Upset, but still calm! Shuichi: You don't seem very calm. Tenko: It may not seem like it to a degenerate, but I'm super duper calm for a girl!

If she's currently under the impression her master was a woman, than she might be emulating him here. I don't think her master was a very calm person, so she has unreasonable standards of calm.

If you try to apologize to her, you get "Do you think you can fix it just by apologizing!?" which is totally something an abusive parent would say. HOWEVER, if you tell her to be quiet...

She legitimately gets scared. This is the same face she makes when she discovers a body, so its not like this sprite is always used ironically.

In order to try to calm her, Shuichi touches her shoulder and gets thrown. In Tenko's defense, she did try to set this boundary earlier and was clearly scared.

They talk about it in the next FTE:

"Shuichi… About before…I'm sorry for throwing you. But it's because you're a degenerate male. Blame yourself for being born that way."

You can write this off as trademark Tenko sexism, but why would she apologize when she clearly isn't sorry. Its a step she takes to appease him, in case he wants to hurt her worse. I think this apology comes from a place of fear.

Then we get something really interesting.

"I woke up in bed… Did you carry me back to my room, Tenko?"

"I didn't want to…but I couldn't just leave you there. It was bothering me."

Tenko is okay with touching men (even if she doesn't like it) so long as she initiates the touch. She also did not have to do this, and I don't think she would if she hated men as much as she claims to.

I think its more accurate to say she's afraid of men. That better describes what I'm seeing.

We get this line in the same FTE

"Yeah… My parents told me I used to have anger tantrums similar to an exploding volcano." Told her. Not tell me. They don't currently tell her. She hasn't improved her temper in the slightest, so why won't they still tell her this?

According to Tenko, her parents were worried she wouldn't be able to fit into society... so they sent her to live in an isolated temple? The logic is questionable. The timeline is also questionable. If she "used to have" tantrums, then why send her away now. Did she stop and then start again?

Her parents are never mentioned again after this. I think Tenko was abandoned by her parents.

This is another reach, but if we assume Tenko had one mom and one dad, I think it is interesting that it's never mentioned she had beef with her bio dad. (a heteronormative assumption, but Danganronpa tends to stick to traditional family structures unless specified) It is possible that she didn't hate men at that age yet.

Despite all of this, Tenko praises her parents and clearly cares for them.

These lines are also noteworthy:

"During my mental training at the temple, I called the head priest, "Master.""

"Master was very pleased about this and added a new rule to the temple. He declared that he was the Master of martial arts!"

So this guy gets called Master once, gets an Ego, and then decides to appoint himself in a position of power. Shuichi speculates on her master's nature, but this paints a pretty clear picture.

In the next FTE, she tries to teach Shuichi Neo Aikido. Her methods are incredibly harsh. She plans to engage Shuichi with no explanation of any moves, and little warning. You could argue that she is just doing this to Shuichi because she's sexist, but she specifically says "Whaaat? There's no such thing as "basics" in Neo-Aikido!", implying this is how she was taught as well. Reminder that we don't know how old Tenko was when she first came to the temple and met her master.

Since we never actually get to see this sparring match, we have no idea what Tenko's definition of sparring is. Except we do in the main story, when we unlock Tenko's lab. Where she attacks Shuichi with no warning... again. This is a pattern. Shuichi cries out in pain from the resulting attack, implying she did not go gentle.

In this scene, we get a disturbing line.

"instead of training, we just fight head on!"

In case you were wondering if this is just Tenko's sexism kicking in, she does the exact same thing to Himiko right after.

That paints a very disturbing tone for Tenko's sparring with her master. Allow me to re-quote her introduction to you...

"If any degenerate tries to touch me, my reflex is to grab them and throw them across the room."

Reflex. Not desire. She specifically states its a reflex.

The next FTE is where she tells you about all the supposed limits of Neo Aikido. Namely that "If you get too excited about Christmas or Valentine's Day, your moves become weaker!"

I find it odd she mentions Valentine's day, such a romantic holiday. It usually isn't considered a main holiday, and something like her birthday would make a lot more sense to mention.

What does she follow it up with?

"In my case, my moves become weaker if I interact with males."

this is the second time she mentioned her master instilling these ideas in her. Also, despite this (perceived) limitation, she still chose to carry Shuichi to his room.

The next line says it all for me.

"I will master Neo-Aikido! That's why I can't be touched by males!"

What happens if she masters Neo Aikido? Her training sessions with her master might slow or stop. But since she's just a child, and still learning... her master must have thrown her all the time, just like we see her doing in her lab.

In her mind, this creates an endless cycle. So, if she represses information about her master's gender, maybe she has a chance at winning. Of being free of her training.

Speaking of her training, during one of Tenko's anti-male rants, she drops this line.

In Neo-Aikido, you can use weapons! You can even attack before the match starts! Those are Master's teachings! Now do you see how invincible it is!?

Tenko... did your master use weapons on you? Did you have to use weapons to defend yourself from your master?

In the beginning of her last FTE, she drops this line. At this point, it could easily be referring to her master, but it also makes sense if its just like,,, random men that saw what's going on.

"Thank you, but I know males actually have an ulterior motive when they give sympathy!"

If her master taught her that specific line, it specifically discourages her from listening to any male that tells her the way she is treated is wrong.

Also, contrast this

with this gem from FTE two.

(Tangent, from what Tenko demonstrates, its okay for males to throw her to the ground with little warning, but Tenko feels the need to do a strained apology when she does the same thing before taking on the "Master" role with Shuichi.)

The conclusion of Tenko's arc in her FTEs?

She begins to question her master's teachings, but then comes up with an explanation that lets her keep her existing worldview.

Even Shuichi's thoughts cast what she's saying into question.

Even despite their heart to heart, she's still scared of losing her Aikido abilities by shaking Shuichi's hand. She's still too scared of getting caught in that infinite loop, but she's starting to doubt if its real.

To end this meta, I'd like to circle back to where we began...

Her extremely controversial love hotel.

It starts like this:

I think that Shuichi being senior is important here. Specifically, I think Shuichi is a standin for her master in a universe where she masters Neo Aikido and surpasses him.

Does this make the whole thing very Freudian? Yes. and? This love hotel was brought to you by the creators of the Kiyo incest plotline.

Also, thicker than blood. Interesting choice of words there.

If you buy into my theory of Shuichi being Tenko's master in this, then the fact that Tenko perceives him as male is vitally important because it suggests on some level that she does understand her master's gender.

Shuichi's thoughts in this role reversal likely mirror Tenko's own thoughts.

But even in this perfect fantasy for Tenko, she still gives Shuichi the power in this situation. You'd think this is the opposite of what she wanted.

Her master is mentioned in this, but I don't think its a deal breaker because Shuichi is a standin for an idea rather than her actual master.

In the context of fights, "the winner can do anything he wants to the loser" has some dark implications considering who she fights with in canon.

Even when Shuichi protests he doesn't want to do anything to her, Tenko encourages it. She expects something to happen. She expects abuse.

Can I remind you that during the fight where Tenko throws Shuichi and later apologizes for it, she specifically asked if shutting up was an order and then started panicing? This bet feels a lot like ordering someone around, even if the word was never used.

These are the most interesting lines in the whole thing. You can interpret them one of two ways:

1.) This is Tenmiko shipping fodder and acknowledgement that she understands Himiko doesn't feel the same way about her.

2.) This is about her master, and the fact that she on some level gets that his only love was for the power he had over her. Either way, there's this theme of Tenko preferring negative attention over no attention.

I'd like to leave you with this one line from the love suite.

If that doesn't sound like an abuse victim pleading for forgiveness I don't know what does.

#ask tag #danganronpa meta #danganronpa analysis #danganronpa #drv3 #tenko chabashira

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cowboymantis · 1 year

Text

I've joined the Toku fandom on Tumblr a while before the one on Twitter, starting with Kamen Rider, and I still have to say that it's insane how different the Twitter side is from here. I mean, honestly, it's the case with any fandom on Twitter. And in this case, people will be overly toxic with their opinions, annoying, and overanalyze everything, so it is LESS fun to them. Like I'm over here overanalyzing stuff because it gives me joy, and they're doing the exact opposite hdhdhd

I think a great example is Kamen Rider Zero-One. It was my first season since I finally wanted to just get into Kamen Rider, and this season has one of my favourite actors, so I was drawn to that the most. I absolutely loved it, from the obnoxiously long henshin jingles and sequences to the cast of absolutely great characters. Sure, the story was a bit questionable at times and had some boring parts here and there, but that wasn't even half as much as the parts that I really enjoyed. Even now, already a while after finishing this show, I think about my fav characters on the daily. :)

But on Twitter, people will take every bad thing about the show and tear it to shreds, some even actively harassing others that like the season. I've seen posts go like "Man, I really love Zero-One!" And someone will show up in the comments like they just insulted their bloodline like hello this post wasn't even about you 😭

Just taking this season as an example because I've noticed that Twitter, for some reason, declared it the season(™️) to hate on at all times. While... nowhere else I see it to this extent?? If anything, I assumed it to be a rather loved one despite the hiccups it's had.

And the thing is, you can dislike something! I don't care about that, but you don't have to force your opinion on everyone else. Some people are actually so obsessive with the season(s)/character(s) they hate that I feel like they post more about hating it than about the things they enjoy. Where's the logic in that?

This isn't the only season, I've seen it with some others or just random characters in particular. Being in the kpop fandom for a couple of years already, it really just reminds me of kpop stans on Twitter. Having an excuse (thing they like = superior, Thing they dislike = everyone that likes it is a loser) to just pretty much harass people minding their business unprovoked.

Who cares if someone likes a season you don't like?? Let them have fun?? I thought that's the point of a show, to have fun watching it. And if you don't, it's just not your thing.

And don't get me started on that time a bit ago where everyone did different Toku polls. Especially the ship ones, it's insane how toxic the reactions for the results were and how the poll makers often were harassed so much they just took it down???? Hello???? How immature can y'all be? Literally insane kpop stan behavior 😭

While I'm still fairly new to Toku, since there's only so much you have the time for to watch, so far, I haven't had a (Kamen Rider, Sentai) season that I hated or even just disliked. There's always something keeping me hooked and that's why I love it so, so much. Especially because my attention span can go ↘️↘️↘️ very quickly when watching a show, that's why I don't watch that many. But here, I can actually binge watch a lot and it's still fun!

Then, like I mentioned before, overanalyzing everything or trying to see some agenda behind it. It is a show for kids to watch in the morning. Most of the stuff on there really isn't that deep. Obviously, not talking about a deep story since a lot in Toku can be quite deep and/or hard-hitting, but more about motives behind it to portray something weird to the viewers.

At the end of the day, I probably shouldn't care about this all, especially since I've never personally encountered someone starting beef with me for opinions, but I also don't have a big account. It just bothers me whenever I see it, then I go and block/mute accounts involved and go on with my day, I just don't want to see that. There's already SO MUCH negativity out there and I've always been having a hard time irl so I just prefer seeing the positive parts of the fandom, especially because like I said already, hello, it is a kids show? And even if it wasn't, it's not real!! And then, the main point of those shows is spreading positivity, so why are you, a 'fan', acting like a villain of the show 😭😭

I've been on the internet for years, and in hundreds of fandoms. But it's just something I've always hated. Why can't everyone just get along 💀

But well. I guess that's just the weird effect Twitter has on people's brains.

#tokusatsu #random rambling about toxic fandom culture #kamen rider

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hillerska-official · 2 years

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Wille and Apologizing

Hello and welcome to: Lia returns to her roots of deeply overanalyzing things from media, now with a live tumblr audience! This is gonna be long and I apologize for that (haha, ironic).

So the other day I posted that over the course of 6 episodes, Wille apologizes a total of 13 times. Not my most popular post by a longshot, but people did have lots to say, and it got me thinking. So first of all: I probably should have specified then that I meant ‘apology’ in the most basic sense, like, he says the words “I’m sorry” or something similar. The original idea behind tracking it was that I noticed he does the sort of knee-jerk reaction apology to a lot of things and apologizes for things which aren’t his fault (same <3) so I wanted to track all of it. But in looking at all the apologies I’ve started to realize that Wille has a really complicated relationship with apologies and regret so here it is:

Some people on my original post have pointed out that Wille doesn’t always apologize to Simon when he needs to, and I think that's true 100% but its worth noting that he does apologize to Simon several times, both necessary and not: when he asks him to delete his Instagram story, when he tries to explain himself after Simon kissed him the first time (”I’m not- sorry- I’m not...”), when he sits down next to him on the piano bench, when he wakes up after the football field scene (I’ve seen people say he didn’t apologize for this but he does, its just briefer than it probably should have been), immediately upon arriving back in Bjastad after denying the video (again probably briefer than it should have been), and of course during the hug before Christmas.

Some of these apologies are those little knee-jerk ones (at the piano, not being able to explain himself after the kiss) and others are about more real things but not in depth enough. After the football field Wille says “I’m sorry for last night” and Simon immediately says “it’s okay,” which like, no, it wasn’t, but I think for a lot of people “its okay” is somewhat synonymous with “I accept your apology,” just less of a mouthful. Maybe Simon shouldn’t have been so quick to forgive Wille, but just like Sara tells him, “you can’t always give everyone a chance, that’s your biggest problem.” That sort of acceptance of apologies is important contrast to when Simon stands up for himself in episode 6 and doesn’t accept it anymore.

And then there’s the last one, which I have. So many thoughts about. It really feels like an all encompassing “I’m sorry,” sorry for everything Simon has gone through, sorry for not being there when he should have, sorry for not being braver, sorry for screwing things up, and a promise that he is going to do everything he can to fix it. You can see him search for the words after the initial apology and he only comes up with “I love you,” which I think is really fucking powerful. “I'm sorry, I love you” is really setting up Wille’s course for season 2, revolution and fixing his mistakes.

What I think is actually more interesting, and very telling of the misplaced priorities that Wille needs to overcome to be better, are his apologies to his mother and to August in episode 6.

He apologizes to his mother almost as soon as she arrives at Hillerska, literally it’s like 2 minutes into the episode, he says “I’m sorry mama” and OH my heart snaps in two every time. It’s not an apology that was necessary, because Wille had done nothing wrong in that respect, but it is the most overtly emotional, explicit apology thus far, not said casually or brushed over. When he tells his mom he’s sorry you can tell he really fucking means it.

Later in the episode, he apologizes to August, and I think as viewers we’re a bit torn here, cause Fuck August, but Wille is apologizing for having brought up Augusts money issues to the society, which was a dick move and did need to be apologized for. He apologizes really explicitly and says for what. (August owes me an apology after that scene for his weird shirt)

I think it’s really telling that these two are who his most genuine and heartfelt apologies (right up til the end, at least) go to, rather than Simon, because it shows us his subconscious priorities, which he needs to overcome, and actively make Simon a priority instead, for their relationship to work.

What else is interesting is that despite all this, the queen does not accept Wille’s apology, just moves on in the conversation, but Simon has very consistently been accepting of his less explicit apologies - Kristina doesn’t forgive him when she should, and Simon forgives him when he shouldn’t.

Originally, my thought was just that Wille makes all these little unnecessary apologies and that makes me sad for him, because he’s been made to feel like he needs to apologize for so much that is neither his fault or a problem at all, and I do still think that’s true, but I think it’s also more complicated. Wille needs to move past his small and unnecessary apologies, but he also needs to start making proper ones. If Wille is ever going to be happy (and GOD, I want him to be, because I really do think he deserves it) he needs to say sorry less, but he needs to apologize more, and I do think he’s starting himself on that track with his last apology to Simon.

#y'all my tumblr was literally lagging trying to type this much #sorry I have so many thoughts and a slightly above average WPM #anyways lmao #young royals #wille young royals #wilhelm young royals #simon young royals #wilmon #queen kristina #queen kristina young royals #august young royals #long post #read more #analysis #character analysis #prince queuehelm

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outrunningthedark · 2 years

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Is it weird that I oddly feel peaceful that there is no trailer or any kind of content that people can speculate on? I made the mistake of being one of the people who overanalyze everything about this show, and ended up feeling exhausted after S5, and we all know how S5 turned out (I’m not talking about any specific ship btw). I’m just enjoying my peace and lowering my expectations for now😌

It's not weird! I bet there's plenty of people who agree with you and are hesitant to say so because they don't need the passive-aggressive reactions :P Tbh, I'm of a similar mind atm. For one, a new promo was/is likely going to tell us nothing we haven't already put together via set pics. Last year, the show made the mistake of including scenes in promos (and releasing stills) that never made it on air, so, if they're smart (lol)...they will stick with content that is "new" yet vague enough where we don't really know what to expect. (For example, we know the blimp disaster is coming. We know Bathena have a story line, so a few seconds of them is a "well, duh" detail. We also know we're gonna see Madney in couples therapy.) Secondly...for me, the speculation can get overwhelming/out of hand awfully quick. It's funny, ngl, that those of us who aren't always up for entertaining wild theories are seen as being "too serious" when (IMO) distancing ourselves from the relentless chatter is our way of showing that we recognize a prime time drama on FOX doesn't need such detailed analysis and meta every single week. ;) [If it makes those people happy, great. But they don't seem to understand that not everyone is part of the fandom for the same reasons, hence looking down on people who don't care to bail out TPTB by assuming everything must have a "deeper meaning" or a "good reason".]

#anonymous #tina speaks

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purpleyellow · 3 years

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Hide & Seek

NCT 24th member / Dream 8th member

Bee’s Masterlist

“The two times Bee avoided Mark and the one she didn’t”

a/n: Feel free to share your thoughts with me. Requests are open!💛

Growing up, in general, is a pain in the ass, and Bee isn't the happiest about having to deal with it. She doesn't know if it's because of how she was raised, or if it's just her personality, but the girl cannot see herself as an adult.

You see, adults are supposed to manage five different tasks, have most things thought out, and try to handle everything that comes their way. Bee, however, wants to lay in bed at every minor inconvenience and wishes she could freeze time so she can digest what's happening.

She can see herself as those five-year-olds who pout, cross their arms and look away when you tell them they can't have ice cream for dinner. Just like she can see Jeno as those parents who bribe their kids to eat vegetables with a false promise of going to the ice cream parlor on the next day.

"Why don't you want to talk to him?" Jeno whispers to Bee midst the chaos in the van. The first time she successfully avoids Mark is when the members are leaving SM after a long day of figuring out stuff for the comeback. Things were only starting to come together, and the boy knows that if Mark and the girl don't figure out everything soon it's not going to be a fun process.

"I don't have anything to say" She mumbles looking out of the window. Jeno turns her head back to him before continuing.

"Maybe Mark has something. Or maybe he has questions"

"Good for him" She simply states. "I already said everything, so I'm not helpful to talk to"

"And you stand by everything you said almost six months ago?" He asks while trying not to laugh "You didn't think about it anymore? There, you said it and moved on"

"Yes, I stand by everything" She lies. Bee has relived every single conversation she has had with or about Mark especially lately, cringing at some stuff she said, making up better answers, and overanalyzing every little word even if they don't mean a thing. Jeno probably knows she does that, yet she's not going to admit that easily, because admitting means confronting the situation.

"Just maybe think things are exponentially worst when you're trying to avoid the topic instead of solving it once and for all" The boy mumbles and she rolls her eyes. Mentally thanking the manager who happened to pull up next to their building

Trying to escape that conversation as fast as possible, Bee holds onto the back of the seat in front of her, accidentally hitting Jaemin in the head, and jumps past Jeno, who frows as he watches her bolt out of the vehicle.

The girl only stops as she reaches the elevator because of the light feeling on her hoodie pocket. She had left her phone behind, throwing away all the work she just put into getting to her room without speaking with anyone else.

Walking back to the van, Bee keeps her head down to avoid making eye contact and waves off Renjun after he shared a proverb about people skipping a step only to return two. Honestly, he might have said something different because the meaning flew right above her head.

The manager, who had also left the vehicle to check on something at their apartment, throws his keys for her to catch and tells her to be quick.

Bee goes straight to the seat she had occupied and starts searching through the openings where the phone might have fallen from, ultimately deciding it was somewhere on the floor. Patting away underneath hers and Jeno's seat, she finally moves on to the row in front of them, getting scared by a light and the muffled sound of her phone ringing.

Almost like a miracle, she was getting a call from someone who might have saved her a couple of seconds of searching. Reaching out for the device, her smug grin turns to a frown as the name "Minhyung from Canada" shines on her screen. A confused noise leaves her mouth while Bee gets up from the floor, though her debating over either answering or not doesn't go very far due to said Canadian standing at the door of the van.

"I thought if I helped out find it, you would finally listen to me," Mark says, ending the call. Though, it seems like that was the only line he had rehearsed because after it they both stay in awkward silence, making Bee look down at the device in her hands before raising an eyebrow.

"Well, my hand touched it before the call got connected?" She, not as confidently, lies again.

Mark shakes his head adamantly "No it didn't"

"Do you have eyes on the floor?" The girl frowns trying to make that topic last longer but he doesn't fall for it.

"Yunhee," He says in a disappointed tone which Bee copies by saying "Mark"

Mark raises one eyebrow feeling rather playfully. "Mark Oppa?" and she rolls her eyes while planing an escape route.

The boy seems to remember what he was there for and scratches his head, suddenly bringing back the awkward mood.

"We should clear everything up, you know" His tone is back to uncertain surprising her by the sudden change and Bee feels her hands clamming up. She knows he's waiting for her to show any kind of reaction but for some reason, she cannot have any.

"Guys, I have to get the car back to the building. You can keep the conversation going at either of your dorms" The manager pops his head through the driver’s seat before climbing it. Bee hands him the keys and both idols slowly step out of the vehicle. Her mind is still blankly looking for a way to avoid listening to whatever the older had to say when the man magically says something that fixes all of her problems. "Actually, Mark come here, it's about 127's schedule tomorrow, something came up"

And she doesn't stay to listen as she bolts to the elevator that's taking her to her safe and Mark-free bedroom.

☆☆☆

The second time Bee avoids him, or gets saved by another person, happened a few days after the van accident when she rapidly types on her phone while running to the end of the hallway where the SM elevators are.

The sound indicating the doors opening on her floor catches her attention and Bee doesn't have to fully look inside the place to see Mark standing on the edge, ready to walk out of it. Almost without thinking, her feet make her turn left into another hallway and she instinctively makes her way to the room she had visited many times before.

Bee knows for a fact Mark is supposed to go to the studio she had just left, so the fact she can hear him doing the same route she is, makes adrenaline pump inside of her and the girl starts sprinting as fast as she can.

She finds it stupid how her brain suddenly read that moment as her being chased by something dangerous, but there's not enough time to let her process the situation. Instead, Bee barges through the door of Kun's studio and throws herself onto the space between the empty couch and the wall.

Crouching so she's hidden by the armrest, Bee simply says "I'm not here" before staring at the floor in front of her, making the WayV leader question why he's even surprised at that point.

A series of three knocks on the door makes Kun get up and go greet whoever had the decency to announce themselves before interrupting his work like half of his groupmates usually do. Keeping the door half-opened, he's half surprised by Mark standing a little distance away while seemingly sorry to be in that position.

"Hyung, my bad for coming here. But I was wondering if I could talk to Bee" The boy says scratching his eyebrow.

"I mean, of course, you can" Kun starts making the girl's heart drop "I'm not sure why you're asking me, though. And next time you see her, let her know I also need to speak with her"

"Oh, yeah. Sure?" Mark says uncertainly tilting his head and closing his eyes. He stares inside the room through the small space Kun allowed and sighs defeated "Sorry about it, I'll just go"

Waving to the boy, Kun waits for him to walk a little before closing the door and turning to the hidden girl. "You know we could see the top of your head, right?"

"Wait, he saw me?" Bee asks with wide eyes, supporting her head on the armrest and the boy rolls his eyes "Probably yes. The kid is just too polite to say anything about it"

Standing up from the ground, the girl sits on the couch to wait for a little before leaving the room. Kun takes the opportunity to throw himself back on his chair and interrogates her.

"Why are you avoiding Mark?"

"I stole his charger so now he's mad" She pouts looking at the ground making the older scoff.

"I'm not buying anything that simple. Don't think I haven't noticed you've been almost daily in our dorm instead of hanging out with your unit. We like when you visit but it became a little weird when we're not even there yet you still go hide inside our apartment"

"It's too complicated" She sighs craning her neck to check the clock "And I'm actually late for something, so you'll have to deal with my stupid high school problems sometime later"

"They're only stupid because you thought over them a million times and began downplaying whatever they are. You can't do that forever and you know it"

"Confrontation makes me cry, so I'll try my best to keep pushing it away" Bee smiles like something uplifting was said and stands up "See you later"

"Sure, good luck with your date" Kun smirks turning back to the table and checking on his work. Noticing she hadn't actually left the door he lets out a chuckle "Chenle told me about it"

"It's not a date. Chenle was literally invited to tag along" Bee rolls her eyes and he shrugs despite not looking back at her.

"Sure, have fun"

☆☆☆

Ever since Mark first showed his confusion over how things were going, Bee tried really hard not to make the situation awkward for everyone. She didn't want them to be extra careful around her, nor feel like this big dramatic thing was going on between the group. And to lessen her worries, the dreamies seemed to act the same they had always been.

There is the fact she isn't talking to Mark, but much to her surprise, the girl realized she never really relied a lot on speaking to him. Pretending everything was fine became part of her routine for that two weeks.

But just like Kun caught onto her distancing herself, a bunch of staff members also did. The choreographer who first introduced them to the routine asked her a couple of times if everything was okay, and the producer noticed the idol was out of the room the time she was finished, not really mingling like the rest of the boys.

Those two didn't really say anything about it, since she was still getting work done. That isn't the same for the management team, who not only saw her change in behavior but feared how much of that would be noticeable in videos and the overall dynamic of what they had waiting for the comeback.

"Bee, can I talk to you for a second" One particular manager called for her as she was resting on the corner of the dance studio.

Bee gathered her things in a pile on the floor and got up to follow him out of the room. The man had worked with NCT for a really long time, but he wasn't the closest manager to her, nor had ever taken care of her individual schedules. She knew whatever he had to tell her wasn't going to be very good.

"We don't want to intrude on whatever is going on in your life. But the moment it affects the group I'm afraid somebody needs to step in" The man sighs walking slowly next to her "If you're not feeling well, or something happened to make you not want to be around the members you need to act on it, or tell somebody so no one gets suspicious of it"

"I'll make sure no one notices it" She mumbles playing with her ring and rolls her shoulders "It's not something to be worried about though. Nothing really happened"

"We'll some people started to point out on Jisung's graduation video that you're often really quiet. Considering your personality it's nothing out of the ordinary, but you can't afford it pilling up and fans talking about it. We're aware of what that saesang said last year and don't think the company forgets easily if more fans start thinking you don't want to be in the group or doesn't belong in it, it's going to be a big problem"

"More people are talking about it?" Bee glances once again to the ring Renjun made her wear.

"It's a small number so far, but there are those who think that by Mark coming back and you being a little quieter, your place might be in another unit," He notices her gaze turning down and places a hand on her shoulder"Don't stress over it right now, just dedicate yourself a little more to the group and show you have a place in it. It should pass after some time"

Patting her, he reminds her to 'go back to normal before heading back to his work. Bee feels a slight headache creeping in and sneaks into a smaller room dedicated to vocal training, where she drops her body on a chair and closes her eyes to either sleep or try to gather some courage and face everything she has avoided so far.

The girl ends up doing neither because a few seconds pass and Mark pushes his head inside the room.

"Can we talk now?" He asks and without any energy left, Bee nods to the chair next to her for him to sit.

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honey-hippie-harper · 3 years

Text

In-Laws Being In-Laws (Re-upload)

Hiii!

So, this is basically an old fic, which I deleted from my other account ( @dawniebb ) and was requested to be uploaded again.

This feels like a lifetime ago afgshjka, but I remember it was written for a Renegades content swap event, and it was for @healing-winston-pratt (hello, wifey!). The prompt was, basically, Nova and one of the Renegays being in-laws, and it was super fun to write! <3

If anyone’s reading this: Hi, you’re a beautiful human being, and I love you <3

In-Laws Being In-Laws

Dear Dread Warden,

I am not quite sure you will get this message because it is been a while since I last used my communicator but, in case you do: I hope you are having a nice morning.

The reason I am writing you this is that, as you must already be aware, right now Sketch and his teammates are taking part in the Annual Renegade Convention as special guests to be awarded for their heroic participation in the Second Battle for Gatlon. Hence, they are out of town. Due to my temporary resignation from the team, I declined the offer to attend the event and, for instance, to receive an award. This means that, unlike theirs, my routine remains the same as usual.

Unfortunately, I must see my therapist for my weekly appointment in two hours, and after that I will have to go to the supermarket to pick up some groceries and essential items. Under normal circumstances, given the nature of my relationship with Sketch, he would have driven me to the supermarket and then back to my apartment, as it happens to be located sort of far from the store and it could be pretty difficult for me to walk while carrying all those bags. However, as mentioned before, these are not normal circumstances and Sketch is not currently available.

I reach out to you with no intention to cause trouble; for instance, if I happen to be asking too much or disrupting your schedule (As I am conscious you are a busy person) and you consider you will not be able to help me, I assure you I completely understand. But: Could you pick me up from my therapist's office and take me to the supermarket afterwards?

I apologize for the inconvenience and I promise I will make sure this does not happen again. In addition, I also apologize for the alliteration in the greeting at the beginning of this message. I did not know whether you wanted to be acknowledged by your real name or your alias.

Sincerely,

Insomnia.

-.-

Hi, Insomnia!!!

So nice to see you!... Or should I say read you! Ha! It's been so long, it almost feels like an eternity! I hope therapy is going great! (We're all really proud of you!)

It doesn't bother me at all, sweetheart; of course I'll help you with that. Could you share the location of your therapist's office, please?

Oh, and also: What time do you want me to be there? (Not that I have anything to do today, I just want to be on time).

I'm excited to see you! Can I take you to eat something afterwards? How does that sound?

Take care!

(Agh. I forgot these things don't actually allow you to write your real name).

-S i m o n.

(Better).

-.-

He spotted Nova way before parking. She was sitting on a bench outside the building, staring anxiously at her phone. The body language of a nervous person.

Simon stopped the car right in front of where she was, and when she realized he was already here, Nova jumped out of her seat as if it had burned her skin, before jogging in an awkward manner towards the car.

Once she was inside, Simon couldn't help but feel a twinge in his stomach. He wasn't lying when he told her he was excited to see her. In fact, he was more than excited, and he had to hold himself back pretty hard to avoid hugging her, because it was evident she didn't want to be hugged right now, for she just directed a tiny smile at him and said:

"Hi."

She was the same Nova he had met some time ago, but at the same time she was different; she was wearing sneakers, skinny jeans and a basic white v-neck shirt; her hair was a little longer, too, to the point she could tie it in a cute little ponytail; Simon could tell she wasn’t wearing any makeup, but still her face looked healthier than before; less tired, with smaller under-eye dark circles and lips covered in chapstick. Finally.

She looked alive. More than before.

“Hi.” He finally responded.

Watching people get better was always satisfactory, but watching Nova get better was different. He had grown to appreciate her, since the very first moment he saw her with Adrian; since the very first moment he spoke to her and saw nothing but utter heartbreak in her eyes. Nova was hurting, and any sensitive person would’ve noticed that. So, watching her get better was a touching experience for him.

“You look so…”

Nova interrupted him almost immediately.

“I know. I...I barely had time to fix my hair. Gosh. It’s so uncomfortable and I want to cut it but I haven’t had time. I…”

“Oh, no, no, no! Your hair looks gorgeous! “ He chuckled, although he was confused by her reaction. “I was gonna say you look really good. Really, really good. The ponytail looks great on you.”

Nova gulped as she adjusted said ponytail.

“Oh.” She muttered in a hoarse voice. “...Well...Thank you. I thought…”

“No, no.” Simon waved his hand. “You look great. How.... how are you?”

She seemed to be processing the question, even though it was not that difficult.

“I’m…” Nova cleared her throat. “I’m doing great. How are you? How’s ...life going?”

“Absolutely great!” Simon smiled, clapping his hands together. “Things at home are great. You know, Hugh’s not currently here due to the Annual Renegade Convention. Adrian’s not here either (for sure, you already know about that) and Max…”

“Max went too, yeah.” Nova smiled. Her eyes seemed to brighten to the mention of Max’s name. Adrian had mentioned this fact about her a couple of times: Nova was fond of children. And even if she wasn’t, she had a tendency to protect and care about them. Since she had this type of strong personality, Hugh refused to recognize that as a truth, but Simon had no trouble believing it.

It was adorable.

“He called me when he got the invitation. He was eager to go.” She continued. “Which doesn’t surprise me. I...It’s his first time travelling, right?”

“Oh, yeah.” Responded Simon. “We’re planning to go on vacation this year. Because, you know, the convention’s being held not too far away from Gatlon and sadly he’s probably gonna get bored.”

“Bored?” Nova shifted herself in the seat, awkwardly. “Why?”

“Well...those conventions are...well, conventions.” Simon shrugged, smiling at her. “There are a lot of speeches, one after the other and, sure, the guests that represent Gatlon can skip some of them, but others are mandatory and they’re like 2 hours long and it’s so boring and…”

Nova hissed, grimacing, to which Simon nodded in agreement.

“I’m glad I didn’t have to go.” He admitted. “Though I do wanted to be there when Adrian and Max received their award. Too sad.”

Nova tried to speak a couple of times, until she finally had found the correct words to said her thoughts out loud.

“Why...why didn’t you go, then?”

“About that.” Simon chuckled. “Tamaya is going to be there too, as a speaker. And she’s also receiving an award. So...somebody had to take care of the Headquarters and Kasumi and I were left with that responsibility. However, it’s been pretty peaceful, as you may have noticed.”

“I have.” Nova nodded. “Not that I...go out very much, but yeah. Things have been calm.”

“People are behaving for once. And it’s awesome.” he sighed.

Then they stayed in silence. For a while.

Nova stared out the window, avoiding eye contact, while Simon whistled as he tapped his fingers on the wheel.

Not a word. No small talk.

Nothing.

“Sooooo…” Said Simon. “Shall we go?”

“Perhaps we should.” Nova said, immediately, as a flash of relief crossed her face.

So Simon smiled at her once again as he turned on the engine, while Nova put on her seatbelt next to him.

-.-

It took her so little time to come back Simon confirmed she was one of those people who would strategically write their shopping list so they wouldn’t be going back and forth through the aisles. It also surprised him that, being a person so young, she was so...focused on everything.

She really had only bought groceries and essential items. No junk food. No silly things she swore she would need and then she didn’t. Not even candy from the checkout area.

Simon hurried himself out of the car to help her put the bags in the trunk, but once she saw him and guessed his intentions, she quickly said:

“It’s okay. I can do it.”

“I know you can.” He clarified. Because, well, she indeed was a strong person. “But maybe you could use some help. That’s...a couple of bags.”

“Yeah. I know.” Nova nodded, already carrying the first two of the bags. “But I can do it. Please. I’m already causing you too much trouble.”

Simon was yet again confused by her reaction, and he tried to talk to her about it. But just like Nova looked like she didn’t want to be hugged right now, she also looked like she didn’t want to talk about it right now.

So he just opened the trunk for her and held it in case it would go down by its own. It had never happened, but just to be sure. Sometimes Simon’s anxiety made him overanalyze some situations.

Less than 10 minutes had passed by the time Nova finished putting all her stuff in the car, Simon figured she was still training, since she was as agile and fast as she was the day she notified them she would be taking some time off from the team and the Renegades in general.

They got in the car again, and before the silence could get as uncomfortable as the previous one, Simon took the initiative to speak.

“I think...you forgot to answer a part of my message.” He said, carefully. “You know...the part where I told you that maybe we could...go to a restaurant or something?”

Nova’s face, ears and neck turned so red she became a human-shaped cherry, and although in other circumstances he would’ve considered it adorable, this time he couldn’t help but feel sympathy for her. He had been there and done that many times; the messages Nova had sent were peak odd. The type of messages one would overthink over and over again because they had to be perfect. And if something, anything sounded off after you sent it, your world would be in shambles.

So he just smiled to assure it was okay. That he didn’t mind. That those messages didn’t have to be so formal in the first place.

And that, obviously, didn’t work.

For his experience, it never did.

“I...I...Yeah.” Nova scratched her brow. “Pretty much I...I...can recall not knowing how to word that so I just left it blank and I...must’ve forgotten to…”

“Nova.” Simon said, softly. “It’s okay. I don’t mind.”

“Did I...offend you or something?”

“Absolutely no!” He said. “Why would you think that? It’s just a slip. I know it wasn’t your intention and to be honest I still want to take you to eat something so...yeah, there’s no reason to get weird about this. There’s no need to worry.”

Nova took a deep, hasty breath. She was flustered, son Simon tried to keep her calm; to make her feel like she was in a safe environment.

Why wouldn’t she be, in the first place?

She was his son’s girlfriend.

Why would he want to hurt her or make her feel bad?

“Nova, darling.” He said again. “Do you have something on your mind?”

“I do.” Nova cleared her throat, crossing her arms over her chest. “I don’t really...can eat out right now. I barely manage to afford my groceries, you know? It’s been…”

“But you’re not gonna pay your own bill. I mean, why would you do that?” Simon raised an eyebrow at her, genuinely confused, but still laughing nervously. Sweet rot, who had hurt this child so much? “ I’m the one who’s taking you to eat. You wouldn’t have to…”

“You don’t have to either!” She snapped. Not mad, but rather distressed, while breathing heavily.

Simon went still, afraid he would make it worse. Still, he couldn’t leave it like that, so he gulped and, once he reunited enough courage, he dared to speak again.

“What’s really on your mind, Nova?” He asked, this time in a more soothing voice. Nova’s whole being went red again, but the shadow of confusion in her expression was noticeable and hard to ignore. For this reason, Simon decided to provide some kind of scaffolding.

“For example: Why would you write a message that is directed to me in such a formal way?” He asked, patiently. “Why would you ask me to pick you up as if you were asking me to help you commit a crime? Why would you act so uncomfortable around me when it’s not the first time that we’ve met? Why would you…?”

“Because it’s you.” Nova answered, avoiding eye contact.

And he expected that answer, yes. But, at the same time, he expected to understand the statement once it slipped out of her mouth.

However, he didn’t.

“Can you elaborate?” He requested.

Nova clicked her tongue as she rubbed her neck, staring at the dash right in front of her.

“...I can disappear if you want me to. Would that make you feel more comfortable?”

“No. No, no.” Nova nodded, waving her hands, finally looking at him. “That won’t be necessary.”

“Then...would you tell me what’s wrong?”

Nova thought about it. She squirmed in her seat. Gulped. Coughed. Squirmed again.

Then, playing with her own hands, she spoke.

“...I’m ashamed.”

“Ashamed of what…?” Simon tilted his head to the side. “Ashamed of who…? What exactly are you ashamed of? ...Dating Adrian?”

Nova flinched.

“I would never.”

A spark of pride illuminated his thoughts and his insides in general, but Simon tried to pay little attention to it.

“I’m just...ashamed. Of everything.” Nova said, sighing. ��I…”

And she cut herself in the middle of the phrase, realizing that once again she wouldn’t be able to finish it.

Simon didn’t realize he was frowning until he felt the muscles of his face slowly giving in. He understood.

And he knew that anything that had happened during the Second Battle for Gatlon had been her fault. She might have contributed in some way but, at the end of the day, she was just a child.

A very confused and manipulated child who just needed someone to listen without twisting her words as they pleased.

“...I just think that...if I were you I wouldn’t like me either.” She wasn’t crying, nor did she sound like she was about to any time soon. There was so much resignation in her voice that her words weighted as much as a giant rock. “Hugh gave me his blessing to...you know, date Adrian…”

“I can recall giving you my blessing too.”

Nova tripped on her own words.

“I mean, you did. You both did.” She said. “But still… It’s because… because you want him to be happy. And I get it. I really do. And I understand because, like I said, I wouldn’t like me either...I know I am loved. I know I matter for some people...but I also know I did...bad things, and I carry this sort of cursed last name…”

She stopped and breathed for a second before continuing.

“And I…” She finally looked at him. “I get it. You don’t have to pretend you like me, after all that happened. After I stole stuff from your house; infiltrated into your system; caused a terrorist attack...You really don’t have to pretend.”

Simon blinked, and if it wasn’t for her specific and controlled body language, he would’ve thought she was making excuses or even joking.

But Nova was telling the truth.

And it was heartbreaking.

“Perhaps you should think outside the box and picture a scenario in which you realize we’re not pretending.” That’s the only thing he said.

“Perhaps you should realize that we love you and you matter to us.” He reached for her hand and softly touched her knuckles. Her hands were shaking. “And that, yes, we want Adrian to be happy, but we also want you to be happy.”

Nova’s eyes seemed to be covered in crystals, but she remained in silence.

“You’re part of this family now, Nova.” He smiled. “And I’m sorry, but you’ll have to deal with that.”

Nova sniffed, swallowing, while lacing her hand into Simon’s.

“Artino and everything?” She muttered.

“Artino it’s not what defines you.” Simon chuckled. “You’re Nova. Just Nova... And we’re really proud of you. Not ashamed.”

She smiled back at him, wordless, and Simon gave her a quick handshake before putting his hands around the wheel.

Because even now, that her walls were crumbling right before her eyes, she didn’t look like someone who wanted to be hugged at the moment, and he accepted and respected that.

“I was planning to take you to my favorite restaurant, but maybe we can prepare a homemade meal instead?” He suggested. “You know? In-laws being in-laws? … Not to brag, but I make the best lemon pie in the world.”

Nova chuckled. Relaxed.

Happy.

“Sounds great.” She said, nodding.

“Excellent.” Simon turned on the engine.

“Let’s go home.”

#renegades trilogy #marissa meyer #dawnie writes #Simon Westwood #The Dread Warden #Nova Artino #Insomnia #Dawnie re-uploads saga #i love being a clown #no nomás tengo la cara de pendeja también soy JAJAJAJAJAJAJAAJAJAJA #this was before hcttr ruined my life #good times

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