#also this is like early 2022 okay PLEASE

[day-mark]

good morning thinking about the way dream loves and how he describes his friendships in an almost romantic manner and how that is very special to me

i love how while he can make comparisons to "traditional dynamics", brother, father, etc. he also doesn't shy away from using descriptors that i think most would interpret as romantic.

i feel like most people would hear the phrases "more than a friend", "-you've been my partner ever since", "you have a place in my heart" and even dream consistently referring to sapnap and george as his "soulmates" would have someone assume it's about a significant other without context. dream using such romantic terms for his friendships is very special and almost inspirational to me in a way?

it just makes me think about how he views his own sexuality and even marriage, idk something about how it's not about the label or tradition or what is commonly accepted, but about the relationship itself, how you personally view it, and what it means to you is something that resonates a lot with me

+ <3

[bronzeyslcve]

snuggle bug - georgia stanway

paring: georgia stanway x female reader

theme: fluff

summary: you’ve had a very bad day and just want to cuddle up with your girlfriend

warnings: mentions of knee injuries

notes: if anyone has any fluff requests, please send them in because i would love to write some more fluffy stuff x

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You loved football. Football was your life. You could kick a ball before you could walk, you always had a ball at your feet, not caring what any of the boys thought, you were much better than them anyways. It was a true blessing that your career had been injury free. Not many footballers can say that. Sure you’ve had the usual cramps and overstretching, but nothing that stoped you from playing. Week in, week out you were on the team sheet for whatever club you we’re currently playing for, whether that be in the starting lineup or sitting on the bench to more than likely come on in the second half.

Currently, you were playing for Bayern Munich, you had been for two seasons now. You had moved to the club back in 2022 with your long term girlfriend, Georgia Stanway. And it was the best decision you have ever made. Bayern felt like home. Neither you, nor Georgia ever wanted to leave.

This week, you had been training for one of the bigger games of the season, against Wolfsburg. The team was obviously looking to win, to keep the 44 match unbeaten streak alive and up it to 45.

Everyone felt as if they were fully prepared for the match, training had gone well and things were looking promising for a victory over the She-Wolves.

However, unfortunately the game didn’t go in your way. An early goal from Endemann had you all frazzled and for you, the game just went downhill from there.

It was in the thirty eight minute. A beautiful pass from Georgia landed at your feet, you ran onto it, overstretching slightly and felt a sharp pain in your knee, accompanied by the feint noise of a pop, which sent you onto the floor. The goal that could’ve been, wiped away.

As soon as she saw you go down, Georgia was straight over to you, helping you to sit up. You buried your face into her shoulder, not wanting any of the fans to see you cry.

“What hurts baby?” Georgia asked, voice full of concern as one of her hands rub up and down your back in a soothing manner.

“Right knee,” you winced as the medics rushed over, attending to the injured area.

“Y/n, was ist los?” came the voice from your captain, Glodis as she knelt down on the other side of you, taking immediate notice on the way you could barley move your leg and the tears in your eyes.

“Her knee,” Georgia simply stated, worry plastered all over her face as she continues to rub her hand up and down your back. She wants nothing than to cry for you, but for now, she kept herself strong, not wanting to worry you further.

Glodis nodded as she watched the medics do their thing, the rest of the team on the sidelines having a quick gel and discussing tactics: all of them worried about you.

The small mutter of “wir brauchen die trage,” from one of the medics rang through your ears and that made more tears fall from your eyes into your lovers shoulder. You had always hated the idea of having to come off of a pitch on a stretcher. Yet here you were.

“It’ll be okay baby, I promise,” Georgia reassured you, pressing gentle kisses to the top of your head, trying to keep you as calm as possible.

All you can manage is a small nod of your head as you’re gently positioned onto the stretcher, that had come onto the pitch, by the medical staff.

“I love you,” she exclaimed as she walked behind the stretcher as you were being led off, one of her hands in yours, the Bayern fans clapping in the stands for you.

Glodis also walked with the stretcher until it reached the sidelines of the pitch, asking the medics in hushed German what they thought your injury was. It was no surprise when they muttered that the three dreaded letters were one of the possibilities. However you didn’t think about that, you just focused on your hand in Georgia’s.

“I love you too G,” you managed to reply shakily, voice thick with more, unshed, tears. As soon as you were off of this pitch you would cry properly, you just couldn’t do it in front of the fans.

Georgia pressed a kiss to your forehead and gently squeezed your hand before reluctantly letting go. She knows she has a match to play and as soon as that’s over she’s by your side and never leaving.

The match unfortunately did not end up in Bayern’s favour. A 67th minute goal from Beerensteyn sealed a 2-0 victory for Wolfsburg. The team just weren’t their best today and your injury had knocked them further, all of them incredibly worried about you. Especially Georgia.

As soon as Georgia had shook hands with the opposing players and said a quick ‘danke’ to the fans, she was rushing through the tunnel to make her way into the medical room where she knew you were.

The midfielders heart broke when she saw you laying there, knee all braced up, crutches propped up by the side of you, tear marks stained into your cheeks.

“Oh baby,” she sighed as she came and gently sat down next to you on the bed, one of her hands reaching for yours.

“It hurts G,” you whined as you felt a gentle kiss get pressed to your forehead.

“I know sweetheart, I know. Let’s get you back home so you can rest it, I assume you’ve got to go for scans tomorrow?”

“Yeah, scans tomorrow and then if needed, surgery whenever.”

Georgia nods as she presses a gentle kiss to your lips before getting up and grabbing your crutches, holding them out to you.

“I would carry you, my love, but I don’t want to hurt you even more. These your meds?”

“Mhm, gotta take them for the pain,” you state with a soft groan as you manage to pull yourself off of the bed, relying heavily on the crutches.

“Take it easy baby, we’ve got as long as you need, I promise.” she reassures you, one hand gently resting on your back as you swing your way to the changing rooms, your meds tucked underneath her arm.

When you got in the changing rooms, Georgia helped to sit you down at your cubby, which was right next to her own. All of your teammates gave you gentle reassurances that you would be okay, that you would come back stronger and better. It was sweet of them, but you weren’t really paying too much attention. You just wanted to go home, lay in bed and snuggle with Georgia: who was now having a slapdash post-match shower so she could get back to you as quickly as possible.

It’s about six hours and one long bus journey after the match ended that you finally manage to make it home, back to your apartment about ten minutes away from Bayern’s training grounds. Georgia helps you into the lounge, before busing herself with making sure that everything in the apartment was safe. That there was nothing you could trip over and accidentally cause more damage to yourself.

You found what she was doing incredibly sweet, however you still want your hugs. You needed them.

“Georgia,” you winced as you shifted yourself slightly on the sofa, so you could see what the midfielder was doing down the hall.

Her head immediately snapped up, her eyes meeting yours and she rushed over to you, her voice full of concern. “Baby, don’t move so much, it’ll hurt more. What’s wrong?”

“I just want cuddles, please,” you plead, pulling your puppy dog eyes and pouting a little.

Georgia smiled and nodded, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to your forehead before whispering, “of course sweetheart. In bed?”

A small “yes please,” was all that left your lips and then Georgia helped you into the bedroom, being extremely careful to not cause you any more harm. Once in you’re in your room, you get into your side of the bed and get comfortable, immediately melting into Georgia as she wraps her arms around you, holding you tightly against her chest.

“You’re my little snuggle bug, hm baby?” she mutters and you can tell by the tone of her voice, she’s smiling.

“Mhm, can we just stay like this, all night? Please,” you beg, nuzzling your face into the crook of her neck.

“Course we can sweetheart, this okay?” she asks softly whilst rubbing one hand up and down your back, the other gently playing with your hair.

“It’s perfect G, I love you,”

“I love you too sweetheart, I’m so sorry,”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, it’s not your fault that I got injured now, is it?”

Georgia smiles and shakes her head, continuing to hold you against her revelling in the way you practically cling to her: before she speaks up again a few seconds later.

“I know, but still, I just hate how you’ve had such a shit day, baby, I’m sorry about that.”

You smile and let out a small hum against her, holding her just as tight, if not more so, as she’s holding you. You feel so safe, so comforted and loved in her arms, you never want to leave them.

“You wanna know why it’s even more shit?”

“Baby, you’ve potentially fucked your ACL, how on earth can this day get even more shit?” she asks, intrigued to what you’re going to say.

“I came on my fucking period,” you whine and that makes your girlfriend burst out laughing.

“My god, I didn’t know what I was expecting, but it certainly wasn’t that my love.”

You laughed softly, shaking your head in disbelief before pulling your head back to properly look at her face. Hearing her laugh was still one of the most beautiful sounds you’d ever heard: even if it was at your expense.

“It’s not funny!” you protest, although it’s feeble because you can’t help but chuckle along with Georgia.

“Oh baby, it is. You’ve got the shittiest luck ever,” she giggles, and at the sound of it, like always, you feel yourself swooning.

“Just shut up and go get me some chocolate,” you say with a cheeky grin, which she gently kisses from your lips, so it turns into a soft smile.

“Fine, fine, I’ll be right back .”

For the rest of the evening, you spent it cuddled up to Georgia, sharing the chocolate and watching some random movies. Tomorrow, you would go have your scans, find out exactly what you’ve done to your knee and you weren’t worried about it anymore. If you had torn your ACL, you knew you could get through it because you had Georgia by your side, and you always would.

[purplephantomwolf]

Love in Motion

Chapter One

Synopsis: You're a normal college student until you get a wrong number text.

Note: This is not an accurate portrayal of how the real people in this act. I do not know them personally, so I will not be portraying them accurately.

Warnings: None

Masterlist

I AM REWRITING THIS FROM AN OC STORY. IF I MISS ANYTHING, PLEASE LET ME KNOW SO I CAN FIX IT! THIS IS CHAPTER 1 OF 5 OF ALREADY WRITTEN CHAPTERS.

April 4, 2022 12:30pm

     You sigh, turning your attention away from your software engineering professor to your laptop screen. You watch as the 20 best drivers in the world complete the last lap of the first race of the 2021 Formula 1 season. You just recently got into Formula 1, so you’re watching the 2021 season to get a feel for the sport. Someone told you the 2021 season is a great season to watch because of the fights between Max Verstappen and Lewis Hamilton. You silently cheer as your favorite driver, Lando Norris, finishes P4. You look up at the clock and see that it’s only 12:30. Still 35 minutes left of class, you think. You let out a small sigh, turning back to your laptop. You move on to watching qualifying for the first Italy grand prix of the 2021 season. You have just clicked play when you feel your phone vibrate in your pocket. You grab it and see a text message from an unknown number. 

Unknown Number: Did you make it home from the club okay?

You: *One Image Attached* Considering I’m currently in a programming lecture, I think you may have been given the wrong number. I’m sorry.

     I send a picture of my view of my professor, laptop, and notes to the unknown number. 

Unknown number: Oh, thank you! I’m sorry for bothering you!

Unknown number: Hang on, are you watching Formula 1 while in lecture?

You: It’s okay! Also, yes I am watching Formula 1 while in lecture. I’d rather be learning about Formula 1 than boring C++. Also, why are you texting someone about getting home from the club okay? It’s 12:30 pm?

Unknown number: It’s currently 2:30 am for me. I was attempting to text a girl I was talking to at the club, but it looks like she gave me the wrong number. 

You: Oh, that makes sense. Wait, where are you that’s 14 hours ahead of me? Also, I’m sorry about the whole wrong number thing. That really sucks. Unless she gave you the wrong number cause you’re a creep. Then you deserve it. 

Unknown number: I’m currently in Melbourne, Australia. And I wasn’t being a creep! At least, I don’t think so. I hope not at least; I try my best to not be a creep. 

You: Alright, that’s good. I doubt you were being a creep. And Australia? Jeez, that’s so far from me. I’m in the United States.

Unknown number: That's only a small stretch from Australia. 

You: Yeah, it’s going to be not fun to watch the F1 race this weekend, but staying up is so worth it to see the race live.

Unknown number: Big fan of the sport? 

You: Yeah, I am. I just recently got into it, so I’m watching the 2021 season to learn everything I can. I’m also attempting to watch all the qualifying and races live.

Unknown number: Oh cool. That’s got to be tiring because most of the races are in Europe. Waking up early every day of the weekend must suck. 

You: I mean, yeah. It kinda sucks, but it’s not too bad. I’m not waking up super early unless it’s races in places like Japan and Australia. The earliest I have to wake up is like 6 for other races. That’s not too bad though. 

Unknown number: Oh, that’s not too bad then! Which team do you support?

You: Well, there’s not a specific team I really support. If I have to choose one, it would be McLaren, probably followed by Red Bull. I support drivers more than I support teams really. 

Unknown number: Okay, then who are your top three drivers?

You: That is a hard decision to make for 2 and 3. Lando Norris is for sure my number one driver, but I have like 5 drivers tied for second and then 5 tied for third. 

Unknown number: Oh interesting. Any drivers you dislike then?

You: No, I don’t dislike any drivers. Unless you count past drivers *cough* Mazespin *cough* 

Unknown number: That’s a funny nickname for Mazepin. But why don’t you like him?

You: I’m not sure. I just get a weird vibe from him. 

Unknown number: Interesting. But I get what you’re saying. Can I ask why Lando is your favourite? 

You: Sure! Lando is my favorite because of his personality, humor, and how he speaks out about mental health. I really struggle with depression and anxiety, so having such a public figure speak out about it is amazing. Also helps that he’s got the boy next door charm. That’s definitely my type lol

Unknown number: Ahh, okay! Those are good reasons to like him! Now, I feel weird talking to a nameless person. Can I ask you what your name is?

You: My name is Y/n. Can I ask what your name is?

Unknown number: Y/n, that’s a pretty name. My name is Luke. 

You: Nice to meet you, Luke. 

     You look up when you hear a commotion around you. You see that your classmates are packing their things and leaving. Wow, time really flew by talking to this stranger. You put your phone down and quickly pack your things. You sling your backpack over your shoulder and head out. You feel your phone vibrate with a text again. You see that it’s Luke again. 

Luke: Nice to meet you too, Y/n. 

9 pm

     You groan, leaning back in your chair. You glare at the lab manual you’ve been trying to make sense of for the past two hours. You glance over at your phone as it lights up with a message from your mom, and you pick it up to respond to the message. You are distracted from responding to her though because you see a message from Luke from 10 minutes ago. Your eyebrows rise in surprise. 

Luke: Good morning!

You: Uh, hi. Good morning! Did you sleep well?

Luke: I did! Has the rest of your day gone well? 

You: The rest of my day has gone okay. I’ve been staring at some stupid code that’s not working. The assignment is due in three days, so I need to get this code fixed.  

Luke: That sounds awful. I’m so thankful I’m no longer in school.

You: Yeah, I’m jealous. I’m searching for jobs in my dream field, but I haven’t found any that allows me to do what I want yet. 

Luke: Oh? What’s your dream job then?

You: My ultimate dream job is working as a photographer in the motorsport world, preferably F1, but I’d take any motorsport. My next dream job is just anything that allows me to travel the world taking photos. 

Luke: That would be an awesome job. I recently got into photography as a hobby. Do you have any photos you’d be willing to share with me? 

You: Sure! 

     You send him five of your favorite photos I’ve taken. Two are of cars on the move, one is a still life of a bunch of cars from a car show, the fourth is a sunset, and the last is of a group of people playing soccer. 

Luke: Holy shit! Those are amazing! 

You: Thanks! I’m really proud of these photos. They’re some of my favorite ones I’ve taken. 

Luke: They’re beautiful. 

You: Thank you! So, you mentioned that you’re no longer in school. Can I ask what exactly you do?

     You wait for a minute, but get no response. You decide to mess around on your phone for a bit while waiting for a response. After 5 minutes of not getting a response, you set my phone down. Right as you set your phone down, a notification for your chat with Luke pops up and you quickly click it. 

Luke: I am an event manager for McLaren F1 team. 

You: Really? That is so cool! I wanted to do event management in sports before I was in software engineering, though I was wanting to get into baseball. If I was still event management, I’d want to do motorsports now. Do you enjoy it? What does that entail? 

Luke: I plan events for the fans mainly. 

You: That sounds like a fun job. 

Luke: Why did you switch?

You: My parents thought I wouldn’t find a job that would make as much money as they do, so they made me switch to software engineering because it has higher paying jobs. 

Luke: Well, that’s stupid. Were you happy in event management?

You: Yeah, I was. But my parents are paying for my college, so I have to do what they want.

Luke: That’s very stupid. I take it you aren’t happy with software engineering?

You: No, I’m not. But I’ve only got two years left, so it’ll be all good!

Luke: Alright, well good luck. 

You: Thanks! Do you have a hangover?

Luke: I actually didn’t drink that much, so no hangover for me!

You: That’s very nice. I’ve never been hungover. I don’t drink a lot when I do drink. Can’t stand the taste of alcohol lol

Luke: Oh yeah, I get that. Do you want to play a game?

You: What game?

Luke: 21 Questions? To get to know each other?

You: That sounds like a good idea. I can start. What is your favorite thing to do in your off time?

Luke: I like to play video games. What is your favourite tv show?

You: Doctor Who. I could go on about that show forever. Who is your real life hero?

Luke: Valentino Rossi. What’s your favourite season of the year?

You: Fall. The colors are beautiful, the temperature is beautiful. I love it. What is your favorite song?

Luke: Right now it’s Last Last. What is your favourite city?

You: Of all the cities I’ve been to, London or Barcelona. If you had to guess what people appreciate the most about you, what would you say? 

Luke: My humour for sure. You’ve been to London and Barcelona?

You: Yeah, I went when I was a lot younger with my family. My family went on a three week trip to four different countries in Europe. We went to London, Paris, Zurich, and Barcelona. I loved London the most. It was right before the 2012 Olympics, so the city is probably different from what I remember now, though. Are you more of an introvert or an extrovert?

Luke: I would say I’m in the middle. What are your top three items on your bucket list? 

You: Going to an F1 race, start going to the gym, develop my skills in photography even more. Do you like to go to the movies or prefer watching them at home? Do you talk during movies?

Luke: I would prefer watching them home because it’s more comfortable. Plus it’s not expensive. I do not talk during movies if it’s the first time someone is watching it. If it’s not the first time, I’ll discuss the movie with others while watching it. If you could choose any F1 race to go to, which one would it be?

You: I’m torn between Austin and Great Britain. I know Monaco is like the go to cause of the history and prestige of it all, but I think Austin or Great Britain would be more fun with the atmosphere. Are you into podcasts or do you only listen to music?

Luke: I only listen to music. Podcasts need more attention than what I'm willing to give than music. What is your favourite ice cream flavour?

You: Probably chocolate. What’s one thing that can instantly make your day better?

Luke: Talking to my friends. What is the phone app you use the most?

You: TikTok or Discord. How would you spend your birthday, ideally?

Luke: Spend the day casually with my friends and family, and then have a party with them at night. You said you use discord, do you play video games?

You: Yes, I do. It’s one of my favorite things to do in my free time. What video games do you play? Do you usually play single player or multiplayer?

Luke: I usually play CS:GO and F1. What video games do you play?

You: If I play multiplayer games, it’ll be Valorant. But I mainly play single player games, like Assassin’s Creed. Assassin’s Creed Odyssey is one of my favorite games ever.

Luke: Which one is that one? I know they take place throughout time. 

You: That one is the Greek history one. I’m super into Greek history/mythology, so I absolutely love it. 

Luke: Oh that sounds cool!

     You glance over at the time. “Shit, it’s already midnight,” you groan. Now that you’re not focused on responding to Luke, you realize you are struggling to keep your eyes open. 

You: As much as I’d love to continue this, I just realized it’s midnight here, and I need to sleep. 

Luke: Okay, sounds good! Have a good night! 

You: Thank you! Have a good day! 

Luke: Good night!

You: Good night!

     You plug in your phone, shut off your pc, and change for bed. You crawl into bed, falling asleep quickly.

Next Chapter: Chapter Two

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Permanent taglist:

@sol3chu

@faithshouseofchaos

Story taglist:

[evansbby]

an update from me :)

hey everyone, i know i haven’t been very active on here lately. and the reason is because a lot of things in my life have changed. i’ve been debating even sharing this but i feel like i’m in a good enough position to be okay with sharing it.

so these past two years, i had been super active on here (late 2022- early 24) and that was because, well, I didn’t really have anything else. that’s because I had graduated in 2022 and then i just couldn’t find a job in my field. like so many other recent graduates, it was just so hard and tough and it really made me lose all faith in myself.

i found myself to be in the worst mental state i had ever been. I cut myself off from my friends, felt like a burden towards my family, was having meltdowns and panic attacks almost daily, even started eating unhealthily and was just overall in a very bad place.

HOWEVER, i always felt like I could come on tumblr and that’s why i was so active and writing all these stories because honestly, they were almost like a crutch to me. like the ONE thing i had to look forward to in life during those times was the feedback I’d get when i posted a fic, and honestly it’s what kept me going. like i swear to god, on some days this blog and community was the only thing that i had to look forward to and keep me going, and writing felt like such a huge escape.

because i felt so USELESS. like i was wasting my life and not making any money or being able to kickstart my career after uni, and that it would be like this forever, so when I was writing it actually felt like I was doing something with a purpose. honestly on some days I would literally wake up early and go sit in Starbucks all day just writing my fics like i was cosplaying working or something just so I’d have a purpose. (I don’t go to Starbucks anymore lol boycott)

anyways, i never shared this on tumblr these past few years bc you guys don’t understand what a failure i felt like. i would sometimes get asks on here asking what i did for a job and I’d feel so embarrassed of my current state of being unable to find a job when it felt like everyone else who had graduated with me had one and obtained one so easily. like i felt ASHAMED.

i remember once i got an ask asking what my job was and I just said “fashion marketing” bc that was one of the things i wanted to do and id done an internship in that field so i just put that but it was a LIE i was unemployed and the most depressed ive been in my whole life but I thought maybe i could manifest it.

ANYWAYS, and you’ve probably already guessed it, but the reason I’m not so active anymore is because I did eventually find a job. a really good one that I’m enjoying so much and I’m so happy at. Finally, I’m feeling like myself again, like I’m living that life in London as a twenty something that I’d see everyone on tiktok living!! Like I’m finally just having fun, going out with friends, being active, having money to spend on fun things etc.

and it feels so surreal and crazy because when i was depressed and jobless, it made me doubt myself so much. Like the constant rejections and failed interviews made me doubt myself and lowered my self esteem so much and I thought I’d NEVER achieve this life that i have now! And I don’t want to jinx it but I literally thank God every day for finally granting me this because I really feel like I would’ve gotten worse and worse and IDEK.

But back to the main point, and so because of my new job I just don’t have that much time for tumblr anymore. But this isn’t a goodbye post… not at all! I find that when I’m super busy in life is also when I get the most motivated to write! Like for example in summer 2022 I was on here so much and that was the summer I had the most fun, was the most busy. I think when I’m busy in life, I get motivated to write.

Which I believe is the case right now, because I’m SO motivated to complete all my stories, I keep thinking about them and writing them slowly, so please don’t think anything is abandoned! I just wanted to make this post to be more transparent about what’s been going on in my life and what had been going on these past two years. That maybe someone else going through something similar can see that eventually, everything does work out.

Anddd I don’t really know how to end this. I just want to say, yall don’t understand just how thankful I am for having this blog, this platform, to write my stories. For having you guys. Because who knows how much worse my mental state would’ve been these past two years when I didn’t have ANYTHING else going for me, if I hadn’t had this blog it would’ve been so much worse.

Thank you so much for believing in me and enjoying my stories and always always letting me know how much you enjoy them. And I’ll say the truth; I know everyone says that engagement on tumblr has been bad lately but I can say that bc of you guys I have literally never EVER had this issue. And that’s not me being big headed, that’s just the truth and it makes me so happy and grateful. Yall always came through for me and still do now! Every time I think my fic is going to flop, you guys come through for me. I appreciate it so much. You guys have no idea how much you helped me when I was at my lowest. And continue to.

Many thanks

Me 🩷🩷🫶🏼🫶🏼

[sweetbillwriting]

Way Out of Line

ONE

Beneath my perfume and make-up I'm just a baby in disguise. And though I know that it's wrong to be alone with him that "come on look" is in my eyes.

Character: Keith Toshko from Barbarian (2022) played by Bill Skarsgård.

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, heavy themes.

Notes: Merry Christmas! 🎀 I present my newest story now because it's set at Christmas. This story will be full of subjects that can provoke and a theme many recognize. The french is google translate!

Silver Bells, Silver Bells… It's Christmas time in the city…

I looked at the mountain of gifts in front of me on the floor. It was silly I still received so many Christmas presents and that my parents still said it was from Santa Claus. I was twenty-one years old, a whole woman, but I still got everything from my wish list. I sat and looked at an eyeshadow palette from Dior, swatching the shades on my hand while my dad sat and looked at me like I was still his five-year-old little girl. I would always be his little girl, even if I went to college and had my own car. Or technically it was his, but it was mine. What would he have done with a little white beetle?

“Are you happy with your gifts, Jacqueline honey?” Asked my mom when she came into the room, carrying her coffee mug. She was still dressed in her red robe that matched my red pajamas.

“Oh yes, thank you so much, I mean Santa,” I said with a giggle and laid the palette on the neat pile of gifts by the well-decorated Christmas tree. My mom smiled, pleased, and sat down next to my dad, who also drank his morning coffee.

“When will the others be here?” I asked as I stood up, ready to take a shower and make myself ready for our Christmas guests. It was my older brother with his family and my aunt with hers. There would be thirteen people, and I would sit by the kids table as usual. I didn't complain because I had never had a reason to leave the table, and I probably had more in common with my teenage cousins than the grown-ups.

“They will be here at one, but you know Jason is always early,” my mom said looking at her phone, probably checking for Christmas greetings on Facebook. I nodded a little before leaving my parents in our Christmas-decorated living room to walk to my bedroom on the second floor. I had my own en suite bathroom there and could take the time I needed. It was just family, so it wasn't really that important to look great, but it felt better to do my full routine even if no one would touch my smooth legs or check if my eyeliner was completely even.

While I stood in front of my mirror, after my shower, there was a knock on the door, and in confusion, I answered, “yes.”

“Can I come in?” my mom asked, against the door. Doubtfully I opened it even if I was just dressed in a white spaghetti top and panties, but my mom didn't seem to think about that; she just looked at me with big eyes.

“Would it be okay if you took Jason's old room for a few days?”

My first thought was that my aunt and her family would sleep over, but a few days sounded like a very long time.

“What? Why?” I looked around in my bathroom, all my expensive things and light colors. Children were not allowed in there. My mom looked stressed, fixing the red jacket of her velour tracksuit over and over.

“Your dad's friend, Keith, has suddenly showed up.”

I looked at Mom with furrowed brows. I have heard about Keith but more in a nostalgic way from my father’s old stories. I knew he was a musician, and my dad had been close friends with him when they went to college but seemed to have drifted away because of their different lifestyles.

“Why? It's Christmas Day? You can't just show up on Christmas Day?” I said, pulling out a drawer under the sink to search for a warmer shade for my lip pencil. My mom leaned against the marble sink and sighed.

“He has separated. Seems like he has been kicked out and needs somewhere to sleep. Awful woman who kicks him out on Christmas morning!”

“Maybe he is a pig? Maybe he has cheated? Or he's abusive? I dunno, men can be trash.” I continued to search for the right pencil, comparing them to each other. My mom shook her head but then looked at me seriously.

“So can he take your room?”

I had forgotten about the question, and when she asked it again, I felt my hackles go up. Some cheating, gross man would not sleep in my bed.

“Why? He can take Jason's room?”

“Yours is the only one with a bathroom. If he will live here for a while, he can't use the bathroom in the hallway all the time.”

I crossed my arms and pouted.

“Why not? I can't just move all my stuff to Jason's room!”

“We’ll move the important things, and he will let you in to get stuff. I'm sure of it! Keith is nice!”

I made a frustrated sound and pouted, trying to make my mom feel sorry for me, but she started to go through my drawers and cabinets, probably to see what I actually needed to move into the other room.

“Mom...! I whined and stomped my foot like a toddler but didn't get a reaction. Instead, I walked out to my room and looked at its cream color palette. It was so light, fresh, and clean, and a man would absolutely destroy that. I had never even had a guy in my bed, and I wanted it to be that way. I didn't like the smell of heavy cologne or cheap hair products.

“He will destroy something!”

“He will not,” sighed my mom as she walked out from the bathroom too, looking at my room. I think the both of us found things that were a bit embarrassing. My prizes from spelling competitions, my old children's books and movies, but also a super old picture of me and my high school boyfriend I still hadn't thrown out. There were leftovers from my time as a teenage girl in the room; it wasn't a grown woman's bedroom completely.

“Maybe you should stuff some things away…” My mom said gently while looking at my collection of seashells that lay spread out on the windowpane. Once again I huffed in frustration, but Mom didn't care.

“I'll go and find some linen for him, and you can start to move your things to Jason's room.”

I watched my mom leave while I stayed in the middle of my room with crossed arms. I didn't want to leave my room to a stranger. It felt intrusive, and I wondered if he would go through my stuff, read my journals, sniff my panties, or something. I had so much makeup he could break, and he maybe would leave hair and body fluids on my stuff, but my mom had made the decision. I knew she wouldn't change her mind, but I knew there was maybe another way to go, and that was to ask Keith.

I pulled on a pair of silky baby blue pajama shorts with my spaghetti tank. I fixed my hair, long and flowy, and then my makeup the sweet and girly way I've noticed other men liked. I maybe wasn't so experienced in having relationships with men, but I knew how to get their attention and use it for my own gain. Every good-looking girl knew that.

I walked down the stairs while practicing what I would say in my head. I would talk to my dad so Keith could overhear my fake sadness, and say to him how I can't sleep somewhere else. When my dad would say no, because he would, even if it pained him, just because he couldn't go against my mom, I would leave and go by Keith and say hello to him. I would look sad with shiny eyes but sweet and kind, playing with my long hair and fluttering my long lashes. I would brush my hair over my shoulders so he could see my chest, and I would play with the bow in the front of my shorts. I felt quite sure that he would give in.

When I had descended the stairs, I tried to locate my father and listened for sounds and heard someone sniffle in the living room. Knowing that my dad had a cold for a long time, I was sure it was him and prepared myself to look like his sad little girl. I walked into the big living room, looking around the corner by the open fireplace to see if my dad sat on one of the couches, but he wasn’t; instead, another man sat there.

I had never seen a photo of Keith, and I had never thought anything else other than that he was the same age as my dad, but the man who sat on the couch was probably just a few years over 30 and also looked handsome, even if his face was covered by his two big hands. He was crying, and something told me it had been far worse earlier because his hands shook, and in front of him on the table lay several used napkins. He sniffled again and dragged the back of his hand over his eyes, and it was then he saw me.

Both of us looked surprised at one another. In silence, we looked at each other up and down. I couldn't say how he saw me or why we didn't say anything. I just knew I was looking at a really attractive man with big, sad eyes.

“Are you okay?” I said carefully, and he smiled sadly and nodded. My first instinct was to run from him, run from the awkward moment of seeing a grown man cry, but my curiosity took over, and I felt a need to know more. Slowly I walked up to him and sat down in the other corner of the couch with my feet pulled up.

“Are you Keith?”

“Yeah… You must be Jacqueline?” He changed his position so he sat more towards me. I nodded a little and looked away in embarrassment after having looked at him a bit too long.

“Thank you for letting me come like this to you… And on top of that, take your room. I understand if that doesn't feel good; I can sleep wherever-”

“It's okay. It's okay,” I interrupted with a smile even if I had felt something completely different before. He dried his cheeks and smiled with a lowered gaze that made him look boyish even if he probably was ten years older than me. A giggle escaped my lips, but it caused him to just look at me with a bigger smile.

“I can show you the room...”

“Oh, thank you,” he said and stood up with me. He was much taller than me, and I got a tingle in my stomach that moved down lower when I looked at him up and down discreetly.

Been an awful good girl. Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight…

He walked behind me up the broad stairs, and I wondered how his view looked. How much of my ass could he see? Could he see how closely I've shaved my legs?

My cheeks heated like I've been sitting by an open fire, but thankfully my makeup covered a bit of it. I stepped into my room a bit embarrassed but also overwhelmed over having such a big man so close to me. His presence was almost overbearing, and I could feel my heart beating faster and faster.

He took some steps into the room and looked around at the interior, but I just looked at him. He was the first guy, except family members, who had been into my bedroom. He had on a pair of loose lounge pants that sat more tightly over his ass and also in the front, and I couldn't stop myself from looking. I could feel a pulse in my nether regions that made me squirm a little in my place. I had never had the feeling of wanting to be close to a man before just by looking at him, but there was something special with him, but I couldn't say if it was his eyes, lips, or body that made my limbs get soft.

Just by reflex I looked up at his face and met his questioning look.

“Hm?” I said, laying a hand over one of my glowing cheeks.

“I should give you a gift; it's Christmas, and you let me sleep in your bed and… Yeah, it's really nice of you. I should give you a gift.”

I smiled at him sweetly even if my thoughts were far from sweet. Something had taken over me after just meeting Keith, and my otherwise sweet thoughts were dripping with promiscuity. The only gift I wanted from him was to be able to share my bed with him and feel that Christmas spirit taking over us completely.

All I want for Christmas is you…

×××

Have a holly jolly Christmas; it's the best time of the year…

I wore a velvety burgundy dress with a big white collar and a black bow in my half-updo hairstyle. I had always dressed sweet at Christmas, going back to my childhood style, but I felt silly when I stood next to Keith. He was in a deep conversation with my brother about some soul artist I had never heard of, so I stood awkwardly next to them and just listened. During family celebrations, I most often was with my sixteen-year-old cousin Savannah, but I was afraid Keith would see me as a teenager if I was with her and talked about young actors and influencers.

The men continued to talk over my head while I played with my fingers nervously. Earlier, before my 28-year-old brother began talking to Keith, it was he who had been awkward. It was understandable; he would celebrate Christmas with a family he didn't really know, invited due to unfortunate events. He didn't seem to have had much clothing with him either because he had one of my dad's plaid button-ups on, but he still wore the gold band on his left hand. I didn't know what to think about it because I had no idea how it was to be separated, but I still thought he should have taken it off; he had been thrown out on Christmas.

“Chéri, aide-moi au lieu de rester là comme un imbécile.”

My mom began to carry out the dinner to the table and told me to help with a snappy voice. I woke up from my deep thoughts and met Keith's eyes. I couldn't read him, and I swallowed hard before giving him a shy smile. My brother mentioned another musician, and Keith turned his eyes to him quickly to be able to follow the conversation and made me feel silly that I believed he would give me his attention. I started to help my mother, even if my hands shook, and from nerves I did everything thoughtless and messy. My mom groaned, irritated, and fixed the cutlery I knocked into and moved the serving plates I put in the wrong place.

“Tu vas bien? Tu es si maladroit aujourd'hui.”

My mom asked if I felt alright but more irritated than caring, and I looked at her tired; she always stressed on Christmas.

“Je vais bien j'ai juste un peu mal dormi.”

I blamed my sleep and shrugged my shoulders. My mom accepted my excuse, but when she walked back to the kitchen, I looked towards the living room, where I could see Keith now talking with my aunt's husband. I wished I could join them and talk with ease and charm to him, but I didn't even dare to go up to him again. It felt like I had stood awkwardly next to him too much this evening. Instead, I stayed by the dinner table still just as awkward and looked at him with wide eyes. He didn't look like any other guy I've met, and he was so tall he was towering over my whole family. Even if he looked so manly, he moved softly and had a kind aura.

“Are you avoiding me or something?” Savannah had walked up to me with crossed arms.

“What? No.” I looked down at the table and pretended to correct a glass.

“Good.” She pulled out a chair and began playing with a fork, something I would never dare to do because of my mom.

“Do you keep up with Barry Keoghan?” She said excitedly, like it was the most important thing in life. I gave her a fast look and right after that at Keith. If he walked in and heard me talk about such shallow things, he would never talk with me for real.

“I must help Mom…” I said instead and gave Savannah a shoulder shrug.

There wasn't much left to do, and just minutes later, everything was ready. I took a last look at the tables. The dining table sat seven people, and then the other table sat six. I would sit at the smaller table, the kids table. I looked at the childish napkins and the soda in the middle and then thought about Keith. I would sit at the kids table. I felt a weird mix of panic and shame and looked at my mom, who took a last look at the arrangement. It was now or never.

“I want to sit with the grown-ups.”

I sounded like an eleven-year-old that wanted to play adult, and I felt my cheeks glow. My mom turned to me and looked at me confused, but then she shook her head. She gave me a sharp no in French.

“Why?” I whined and felt the panic even harder.

“It's good you're there and can help the younger kids.”

“But Savannah is there!”

“I said no,” said my mom with a louder voice, probably to make me give up, just like she did when I was a kid. That got my dad's attention, and he peeked into the dining room looking confused.

“What is it?”

“I want to sit with the adults. I'm 21! But Mom won’t let me!”

My dad gave my mom a look with furrowed brows. For many years he had felt that I should have a spot at the adult table, so for him it was given that I would change seats. My mom looked at us and then sighed and muttered something in French I couldn't hear. I didn't care what she said because I had won, and I couldn't hide my big smile… It wasn't really that I wanted to sit with the adults; the thought made me slightly nervous, but it was a relief to not look like a kid in front of Keith.

I'll have a blue Christmas without you. I'll be so blue just thinking about you…

Savannah looked hurt when she saw the kids table get filled up while I stood by the dinner table. I had taken a seat at the end where I knew my dad would sit. It felt safe to have one of my parents close, even if I knew everyone except Keith around the table. I looked at an empty seat, and that's when I realized the only seat left for Keith was the one right next to me. I stared out in front of me, scared to look toward my side when he walked up and filled my nose with a warm, musky scent.

“Is it okay if I sit next to you?” He asked, and I gave him a glance. I stared right into his chest, forgetting how tall he was, and looked away again. I gave him a little nod, then looked at my father, speaking to my brother, while standing by the chair next to him and opposite of Keith.

“Thank you…” Keith mumbled, and I gave him one more glance, this time remembering his eyes were higher up than mine. I met the green of his iris, and he gave me a smile before he took a hold of my chair and pulled it out for me. I didn't know where to look because to me that was a thing guys did on a date, or at least for a woman they were attracted to. I looked at my father, afraid he would be upset with Keith, but my dad shared a smirk with Keith, his friend, who just did it playfully to amuse his little daughter.

Keith let go of the chair when he realized I hadn't sat down, and I could see my dad looking on still amused, as if he had made fun of me. I felt the shame rise again but tried to swallow it down because I really wanted to make a good impression in front of Keith. I didn't really know why. It wasn't like I believed anything would happen between us, that I had a chance with a married man, but I wanted to be able to at least pretend something could happen between us.

I sat down, trying to do it smoothly, like a lady, and then looked at Keith when he had sat down next to me. I could feel my cheeks heat, like they had many times that day, but I pretended like it wasn't there. I wanted to talk to him. I wanted to feel I was closer to him.

“How old are you?”

As soon as I heard what question I had picked, I bit my tongue. I had so many questions, but clearly my mouth had chosen the question I wanted an answer to the most. Keith smiled a little and took the wine bottle in front of him and the cork screw that lay next to it.

“Younger than your dad, if that's what you're wondering.”

Instead of looking at me, he looked towards my dad so he could gain his attention. “I'm not an old man!”

My dad laughed and threw out a finger towards Keith.

“Still, you look older than I do, Toshko!”

Keith laughed like it was impossible, and then they continued their banter. I sat and looked between them with a small smile even if I wasn't amused. I wanted a real answer to my question and had a silly thought about how I didn't want Keith and Dad being friends, even if that was the reason why Keith was in our home.

The men quit joking when my mom came to my father to ask him something, and Keith looked at me again.

“I'm 38. So yeah, a bit younger than your dad.” He smiled kindly at me, and I could see small lines around his eyes. He was almost 40. My dad was 47, so the age difference wasn't as big as I had thought between them. The age difference between me and Keith was bigger, though. 17 years.

“You're 20, right? I think you were, like, four when I met your dad.”

“21…” I stared at his big hands while he opened the wine bottle skillfully and I felt something itching in my stomach.

“Did you meet me then?” My voice was small.

“No, it never got that way.” He shrugged his shoulders, then showed me the bottle.

“Wine?”

I looked between his handsome face and the bottle before shaking my head. 

××× 

Santa, tell me if you're really there. Don't make me fall in love again…

I had said to myself that I wouldn't be with Savannah so much to make a more grown-up impression in front of Keith, but after he had told me his age, I gave that up. After dinner I played cards with her and her fifteen-year-old brother and then watched Miracle on 34th Street with the rest of my cousins. How Keith would see me as an adult felt impossible when he had heard about me since I was three years old. I would be a little girl in his mind forever. 

I saw him drink whiskey, smoke a cigar with my uncle, and was loud in that obnoxious way only middle-aged men could be. My ex had been a boy, a boy who liked tennis and Fortnite. I shook my head to myself when I thought about it but still felt an exciting curiosity when I looked at him. He smiled at me a few times, and a couple of times I succeeded in smiling back, but that was the only contact we had the rest of the day until it was time for me to go to bed. 

After my brother, Savannah, and all the others had left, I helped my mom in the kitchen so there wouldn't be so much work to do the next day. Both of us could feel the tiredness in our eyes and bodies and looked at each other confused when we could still hear my dad laugh loudly from the living room. On past Christmas Days he had even fallen asleep before the guests had gone home, but now he listened to jazz, drank, and laughed with Keith in the living room. He seemed to have lost ten years on his age by having Keith there, and I could see my mom was annoyed. She probably wanted to be able to lie down in bed with him because she marched out to them and told him sourly it was time to go to bed. I smirked, amused in my loneliness, because with age, my mom's diva behavior started to become funny instead of scary or annoying. I walked up to my room, skipping on saying goodnight so I wouldn't need to wait for them to finish their nagging. I was tired and lost in thought, so I forgot an important thing: I wasn’t sleeping in my bedroom. It was loaned out to someone else, but I just walked in and, in my sleepiness, closed the door and started to take off my clothes. 

I thought about Keith's marriage while I pulled off my tights. Who was his wife? How long had they been married? 

I thought about their separation while I pulled off my dress. Why did she kick him out? Would they make up? 

I thought about who he was as a husband while I pulled off my bra. Was he loyal? Was he romantic? Was he a generous lover? 

When I stood in my panties, laying my clothes on an armchair in the corner of the room,I heard a creek and looked towards the door that was being opened determinedly. I concealed my chest but didn't do more than that to cover my modesty. In my mind it could only be my mother. No one else would just open my door like that, but in the doorframe stood Keith, so tall his messy hair licked the top of the doorframe. I looked towards him in confusion for a few seconds. His eyes showed shock at first, but then we both seemed to relax under each other's gaze. I could feel him looking at my body from top to toe, and I basked in how his eyes glittered.

“I can take the other bedroom…” he said as he smirked a little. The smirk made me feel a sensation take over me, and a need for rebellion came over me, so I let go of my chest slowly. Keith swallowed hard but his smile grew while dragged a hand over his face. He looked over his shoulder like he was afraid someone would come, but at that moment I didn't care. He pulled his lip and shook his head a little. 

“Um... Good night.” 

“Good night,” I said, with a teasing smile, playing with my hair while I walked to my bed, letting him see my breasts in motion. I didn't know where the confidence came from, probably just seeing his eyes swimming with attraction and his cheeks rosy. 

“Merry… Merry Christmas,” he mumbled before taking a last look and closing the door to my bedroom. I sat on the edge of the bed and looked at the door for a few seconds before starting to giggle. I couldn't believe I had done that. I couldn't believe how he had looked at me. Keith was a grown man. A tall, sexy man. 38 years old. But he was also a friend to my dad. 

×

[ghostsandfools]

Okay guys. Okay. OKAY.

I just went back and watched a couple of the astral related episodes that have released in the past few months and I have a LOT to say.

I don’t think we realize how messed up the astrals truly are. Like, they seem to have noble goals and all, but oh my goodness.

Okay, lets walk through Lunar’s entire life story real quick:

The first episode of TSAMS came out on March 24, 2022. That was a little less than three years ago now. Let’s just keep that in mind.

When Lunar was created, his entire purpose was to serve Eclipse. I’ll be honest, I’m not too familiar with early TSAMS. I joined the fandom a bit late. But Lunar underwent constant emotional and sometimes physical abuse from Eclipse. He was constantly belittled, made to feel worthless, and in the end, Eclipse killed him in front of somebody he cared about. His entire purpose was to serve Eclipse, and suddenly that purpose had been taken away from him.

Lunar was remade in space, granting him the ability to use star power. Gemini then came down to Earth to evaluate if he was a threat and train him in the ways of star power. In the very first episode they appear in, Castor asks Earth to “please leave Lunar alone and stop talking to him.” Earth obviously refuses, but this interaction is still interesting. It’s strange that their first instinct was to try isolating him from his closest family.

Castor and Pollux began training Lunar and eventually becoming closer with him. Lunar was freaked out at first, and it seems like he didn’t really enjoy his training at first, but eventually it kind of took over his life. Star power was his entire purpose. And when he began to develop feelings for Gemini, it only became a bigger part of his life. His personality and goals for the future revolved completely around star power. It was his new purpose in life.

Lunar messes up a couple of times and begins to fear what will happen if he lets his power get out of control. First he attacks Bloodmoon, then kills Eclipse. Killing Eclipse was the especially interesting event here. Afterwards, Gemini makes it very clear to him how much he’s fucked up. They tell him his life could be on the line, that the other astrals want him DEAD, and they seem to be withholding their affection. They don’t spend as much time with him, saying they’re busy with his court case. Killing someone is a bad thing to do, so it makes sense for Gemini to distance themself, but I think we should remember this.

And then, it just stops. Taurus tells him that if he can’t move on from his trauma with Eclipse, he can’t continue to train.

This is detrimental to him. He doesn’t know what to do without a purpose. Eclipse abused him, but he also gave him something to do. He gave him someone to be. His entire identity was serving Eclipse. And now, he thought he had moved on from that. He had a new purpose now, to serve Gemini, to train as an astral and make everyone proud. And now he’s suddenly being told that he can’t anymore? That if he doesn’t get over his trauma (which is exceptionally difficult to do) he won’t be able to train anymore?

And so he makes a mistake. Another very big mistake. He pursues negative star power, he hurts Earth, he’s temporarily shunned by his family. It’s a big mess, he goes to jail, he’s put on trial.

And do you know what Libra does to punish him? She finds him guilty and takes away his star power.

So… This whole time. This entire time, they could’ve taken his powers away. And yet, they didn’t. Why is that? Why is it that they let someone like him, who has been shown to lose control, keep these powers?

Alright. Let’s take a look at the astrals. Let’s take a look at what they’re really doing here, because I think it’s interesting.

I’ve talked about this before, but the astrals operate like a cult.

Lunar is traumatized. He is emotionally broken and he has no idea what to do with his life. He’s just experienced death and lost his purpose in life, and now he has no idea what to do. And all of the sudden, the astrals appear.

Cults will often prey on people who are going through a rough time, as they’re much easier to manipulate and control. Not only that, but when they did appear on Earth, as I mentioned earlier, Castor asked Earth to “stop talking to Lunar” so they could evaluate if he was a threat. Cults will often isolate their victims away from their family and friends. Obviously they didn’t go through with this step, Lunar kept in contact with his family during his training, but it’s clear the astrals will use isolation as a way to control people. Remember when Nebula tried to befriend Earth and Taurus immediately scolded her for stepping out of line?

Next, they trained Lunar. They told him he’d have to leave behind this life on Earth, that he had a bigger purpose now. He wasn’t just an Earthling anymore, he was special. He could become somebody noteworthy if he trained hard enough. And they got closer to him, went on a vacation with him, spent time with him. Eventually they even pursued a romantic relationship with him.

But during this time, it was clear that they weren’t being completely honest with him. If he asked to many questions they’d say “you aren’t far enough into your training to know that yet.” They’d withhold information from him, yet another method often used by cults. They kept him enticed with the promise of something more. If he could get his emotions under control, if he was just a bit stronger, maybe Gemini would like him then. Maybe then they could be fully honest with him. Maybe then he’d be truly worthy.

They stayed committed to him. When he was in trouble, they went to court for him. They trained him diligently, stood up for him, they were always by his side. They cared for him.

And then, of course, disaster struck. They stopped training him. Lunar felt lost, he made a mistake, he had everything taken away from him. He lost his family, his friends, his partner. His entire life fell apart.

But think about why this all happened. They could’ve taken his power away. They could’ve come down to Earth, taken his powers away immediately, and been done with it all. None of this needed to happen.

I don’t think Lunar was justified when he killed Eclipse, and I don’t think it was okay for him to attack Earth either. Trauma isn’t an excuse to hurt people. But Lunar hasn’t had a break within the last two years.

First it was Eclipse, then the astrals, Bloodmoon, Nexus. He was abused every day for years, he died, he was brought back and began spiraling into depression, and then he was indoctrinated into a cult. Now he’s messing around with dark star power and getting himself into trouble.

And even now, he’s trying to be better. He’s been torturing himself, putting himself in that machine Moon made where he listens to his loved ones berate and verbally abuse him. Why? So he can impress Gemini. So he can have a purpose again.

TSAMS is the kind of show that’s meant to go on for a long time. The action has to happen FAST! But because of all the fast paced action, Lunar has been in multiple traumatic situations with no real breaks for two straight years now, and i think it’s messed up. He’s made a lot of mistakes, but he’s trying his best. I feel bad for him.

[sy-on-boy]

(Potentially) new information from the Spy x Family exhibit book!

Okay, I’ve done some digging around and not gonna lie, some information in there has me excited. I can’t read Japanese so I took photos and put them through translate, so it’s not the most accurate, and please take this post with a grain of salt. Here we go!

Translations are more than welcome! Feel free to use these photos and feel free to DM me for clearer photos. I would also love to know what this all means haha. Japanese “raw” text is taken from Google translate and may be inaccurate to what is actually shown in the photos.

✩ The SxF world apparently has no Christmas!

I’ve heard claims of it, and here’s a picture I took.

“遠藤達哉先生 コメント

こちらは冬の休載イラスト です。 電飾一個一個を北斗 神拳ばりに連打して描きま した。 クリスマスっぽい雰 囲気を出していますが、 『SPY×FAMILY』の世界に クリスマスはありません。”

Google translate tells me that there’s no Christmas in the SxF world but he tried to create a Christmas-like atmosphere? Not sure but it would align with other people’s claims.

✩ Yuri apparently had a girlfriend in a rough draft!

This is Endo’s handwriting so the machine can’t recognise the words easily, but I think the woman in the bottom of Yuri’s sheet is his “girlfriend”? And Google translate tells me she’s Yuri’s “weakness” and Twilight might use her against Yuri / take advantage of the girlfriend? This is a very interesting idea that didn’t get used in canon (yet?). I think in canon, Yuri is popular but he’s too devoted to his sister. A new significant other of a prominent character would shake things up. Especially when it comes to Yuri, a member of the SSS.

By the way, Yuri’s potential designs are kind of cool. I like the ponytail.

✩ Apparently “Oscar” was one of Twilight’s potential names! + Early Twilight designs

I think we know Yor was originally short for Yorlanda (this is in the upper sheet). There’s a whole list of names beside Twilight and the name Oscar オスカー appeared frequently. There are also more names that I can’t decipher.

✩ Designs of some potential WISE agents! (And early Fiona)

Fiona’s sheet (next to Yuri’s) was titled “WISE spy (female)” and now we have a sheet titled “WISE spy (male)”. Was Fiona a placeholder spy that made it to the main cast? Or will this “male spy” end up having significance too? The two smaller heads at the left are apparently Twilight’s associates. Also, a Melinda sketch. Not gonna lie, the male spy feels kinda cute. Hope he’s not completely scrapped.

✩ Endo’s interview!

I feel like I should put this earlier but I was distracted with the Christmas / Yuri’s potential girlfriend thing. This is at the very end of the book. Apparently Endo was influenced by the invasion of Ukraine in 2022. This interview was apparently taken in March 2023. I think it’s fairly important so I’ll wait for a proper translation before saying anything else.

✩ Comments on Donovan, Melinda, Redacted, and Sylvia!

These two pages are together and I found it significant because Endo discusses the SxF themes. (My notes are not direct translations.) Apparently:

Sylvia’s scene in Mission 20 is Endo’s favourite scene, and he was looking at materials related to war for a long time and wondered if he could make use of it. [JP below]

とてもお気に入りのシーンです。 「SPY×FAMILY」の連載とは関係無し 昔から戦争に関する資料は色々見て いたので、多少はこの作品にも活かせ ているのかなーと。

Donovan’s statement of “in the end, people will never understand each other” (rough paraphrase) is the theme of the work. And Endo wanted to create a feeling of Donovan being the final boss. He didn’t plan on arranging it from the beginning, but he thinks the Desmonds are a good contrast to the Forgers. (Does this mean the Forgers think people will understand each other?) [JP below]

作品のテーマでもあるセリフ ですね。 少しでもドノバンの ラスボス感を醸し出せればい いなーと思いながら描きまし た。最初から意図して配置し たわけではないですが、デス モンド家はフォージャーと 良い対比になっているのかな と思います

The chapters on Twilight’s past coincided with the anime so Endo thought it was a good idea to explore Twilight’s past. [JP below]

アニメが始まるタイミングな のもあって、黄昏〉という人 物を掘り下げる良い機会かな と思い過去編を入れました。 あまり重たくなりすぎないよ うに、でも伝えたいことは最低限伝えられるように、自分 なりにバランスを取って描い たつもりです。

Melinda is described as “friendly” (?) even though she is dignified. A positive description of Melinda… interesting. What’s also interesting is that after she learns that Yor is the mother of the child who got into a fight with Damian, she “shows interest”. Melinda, what do you want with Anya? [JP below]

ダミアンの母で、東国元首相夫人。気品に溢れつ つも、気さくな性格。 ヨルが息子と喧嘩したアー ニャの母親と知り、興味を示している。

I personally think these two pages contain hints about the mystery of the featured characters and would love to know what it means :D

✩ Early Yor and Bond!

There’s a lot more Yor but again the image limit is constricting me. I really like the Bond designs, they’re funny and he’s just a chonky little boi :)

✩ Comments on the panel of Twilight’s head in Yor’s lap!

“珍しいイチャイチャシーンです。 ヨルさん は一年中酔っ払ってればいいのに”

Which apparently means: “a rare flirting (?) scene, I wish Yor was drunk all year long”

?!??! Twiyor?!! Hello!! I cannot resist mentioning this one, this is one of my favourite Twiyor / SxF scenes. Are we gonna get more drunk Yor? More Twiyor? More flirting? I’m excited now.

I’ve reached the image limit, so here’s all for this post for now! Translations are totally welcome and again I would love to know what this all means. I’m sorry if I accidentally said misleading information, so please tell me so I can correct it. Once again, don’t take my words as complete fact. The Yuri girlfriend thing is really surprising to me haha.

[mirrorball-leclerc]

snow angel - track four

series masterlist // previous // next

DECEMBER 2022

JANUARY 2023

EARLY MARCH 2023

liked by lilymhe, alex_albon, mickschumacher and others

rheareynolds the council sending me off for filming.

tagged: lilymhe

view all comments

user1 somehow all three are very grumpy about rhea leaving.

↳ rheareynolds they were. although the boyfriend has no place to be complaining. he's constantly travelling.

user2 the boyfriend is hot.

↳ user3 you can only see his hair and arms?

↳ user2 and?

vancityreynolds stop lying, i bet they're thrilled.

↳ rheareynolds just because blake always throws a party when you leave doesn't mean my friends and boyfriend do.

lilymhe you couldn't have found a better picture of me?

↳ rheareynolds i think you look very cute

↳ alex_albon that's my girlfriend!

↳ rheareynolds what's your point? she's literally my wife

charles_leclerc have fun but not too much fun!

user4 okay but her cat is literally the prettiest cat i've ever seen.

user5 see i personally love that rhea met lily and the other drivers through lando but they still picked her over him

↳ user6 to be fair they are friendly with lando but you can tell it's not the same as it was.

↳ user7 well lando cheated on his girlfriend and not the other way around.

LATE MARCH 2023

lilymhe and rheareynolds posted new stories

breakfast with the prettiest girl ever.

prettiest surprise visit ever.

charles leclerc rhea come home the children (me and lily) miss you

lily muni he please come back!

max verstappen added two people

logan sargeant bonjour!

logan sargeant i don't speak french

oscar piastri hello?

charles leclerc piastri i swear to seb if you tell nowins about this i will crash into you. alex albon jeez give the kid a chance to breathe sharl

rhea reynolds i wrap filming in may!

rhea reynolds oh hello. oscar piastri and?

logan sargeant i'm logan sargeant, alex's teammate. when will we be getting new music?

yuki tsunoda yes, when can i get new material to further torment norizz?

rhea reynolds july.

lance stroll BOOO!!

rhea reynolds but a single in june

pierre gasly IT'S BARELY APRIL?? THAT'S TWO WHOLE MONTHS AWAY?? mick schumacher sucks to suck charles leclerc YOU LET HIM HEAR IT BEFORE US?? YOUR BEST FRIENDS?? charles leclerc WHAT HAPPENED TO BROS BEFORE HOES?

george russell GIVE US THE TRACKLIST TO MAKE UP FOR YOUR SINS!!

rhea reynolds talk too much, i hate boston, poison poison, gemini moon, snow angel, so what now, the wedding song, pretty girls, tummy hurts, i wish, willow, 23.

charles leclerc claiming snow angel lily muni he claiming pretty girls max verstappen you two are too much sometimes. but i claim so what now.

rhea reynolds his ass is grass. trust.

oscar piastri trust i will be playing this in my drivers room.

MAY 2023

rheareynolds posted new stories

💞💞

i just woke up why the fuck is everyone blowing up my phone? did my nudes get leaked, not that i have any, or some shit? worse, what the fuck did ryan do now?

mick schumacher who fucking spilled??

esteban ocon i spilled milk earlier, why are you asking?? and how do you know??

rhea reynolds how the fuck did some spanish paper find out that i was dating mick??

charles leclerc oh no.

max verstappen YOU TOLD CARLOS??

charles leclerc HE PROMISED ME HE WOULDN'T SAY ANYTHING!!

pierre gasly HE'S FRIENDS WITH NO BITCHES!! WHY THE FUCK WOULD HE KEEP IT A SECRET??!!

oscar piastri this is bad. so bad.

lily muni he OH COME ON!! SERIOUSLY CHARLES??

charles leclerc I FUCKED UP OKAY?! I GET IT! I WILL SPEAK TO CARLOS!

george russell NO! NO MORE TALKING TO CARLOS!!

charles leclerc HE PROMISED!!

max verstappen HIS PROMISES MEAN SHIT! WE BOTH KNOW THAT!

rhea reynolds WHAT THE FUCK CHARLES??

charles leclerc I WAS ALSO DRUNK AND I TRUSTED HIM!!

pierre gasly i thought we learned our lesson after last time?

alex albon this is bad. this is so fucking bad.

rhea reynolds yeah no shit alex.

alex albon you didn't read the article did you?

lily muni he i swear to sebastian that i will be castarating both sainz and norris for what's being said. rhea reynolds oh fuck me.

are you dating mick schumacher?

rhea?

i know you're seeing these

are you seriously dating mick? my friend?

that's rich coming from the guy who cheated on me with a friend.

and if i am i don't think i owe you an explanation.

i also wasn't aware you guys were friends. you take one picture with a guy and suddenly you're friends.

are you fucking kidding me reynolds?

you're dating him?

him of all people

literally fuck you norris.

tell carlos to pull the fucking article or i'm suing his ass for defamation.

for what? telling the truth?

you and i both fucking know that article is straight bullshit. i never did anything to you. i was committed to our relationship more than you ever fucking were.

either he pulls the article or i swear i'll sue him.

fuck you and i hope you choke.

taglist: @emilyval @ihateyougunthersteiner @lesliiieeeee @firetruckstuckley @cashtons-wife @landonorizzz @yoremins @nikfigueiredo @badassturtle13 @cataf1 @silentreader128 @taylorsatl @alessioayla @greeneyesandsunshine @wisteriafence @mrscharlesleclerc @sesamepancakes @localwhoore @vettelsebastianvettel @Pinksstrawberry @yourbane @bborra @aandreea2005 @nichmeddar @asparklysoul @landossainz @scarletwidow3000 @cha-hot @ssararuffoni @cherry-piee @vroomvroommuppett @shineforever19 @kissesandmartinis

strikethrough means i couldn't tag you

CLICK HERE TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST

¡leclerc-s speaks! i do know that the mick quote in the grill the grid video is in reference to seb, but the opportunity was right there so i had to go with it!! if i had a nickel for everytime i made carlos out to be an asshole i'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice. I PROMISE I DON'T HATE HIM!! I ACTUALLY LIKE HIM BUT HE'S LIKE BESTIES WITH LANDO AND IT WORKS OUT SO WELL.

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[valyrfia]

the carlando what now- *gets popcorn *

Okay full disclaimer this is not my area of expertise so someone who is more knowledgeable please come in and correct me.

Brazil 2021, for the Brazilian GP that year around Lando's bday, Lando and Carlos get an airbnb together (rather than...you know...staying in their hotels with their respective teams–Carlos is already with Ferrari by this point!) and spend the week going out for dinners and playing golf. Then, in the actual race, they have an incident, they have an argument, Lando leaves Brazil early, cutting plans with Carlos short.

Also Brazil 2021 is allegedly when both of them cheated on their then-partners. Some people say with the same girl? But I couldn't find proof of it so take that with a grain of salt.

Oh, it appears Carlos and Lando might have shared a house for Brazil 2022 and Brazil 2023 as well, with all the same golf and dinner shenanigans.

Like I said, every driver's got allegations, you're just got to know where to look.

[sailormoonrarepairweek]

Welcome to the third annual Sailor Moon Rare Pair Week! The event will take place from March 24th - March 30th, 2024, but I'm announcing the themes early to give everyone plenty of time to create their fanworks.

What counts as a rare pair for this event, you ask? Any pairing that isn't Usagi/Mamoru (or any of their incarnations), pretty much! (Don’t get too hung up on the word “rare”. Just roll with it, okay?) They usually have their own week, so this event is a chance for fans to show their love for pairings other than the Miracle Romance, canon or not. You can even include poly, platonic, and cross-over ships, if you'd like! Almost anything goes, as long as you follow some simple guidelines.

Fanworks should somehow incorporate the one of the day's themes. (You can pick just one; you don't have to use both.) How you choose the interpret the theme is up to you!

A non-UsaMamo pair must be the MAIN focus of the work (although Usagi/Mamoru can appear as a side pairing or as part of a polycule).

All ratings allowed.

No smut involving underage characters, which I'm defining as under 18 years old. Otherwise, as long as the characters are portrayed as adults in the fanwork, go wild! Just please make sure to properly tag.

Pairings of all sexual/romantic orientations welcome.

Fanfics should be a minimum of 500 words. Poetry may be shorter, though. (If you would prefer to write drabbles instead, you can write five separate 100-word drabbles about the day's themes, but a day's entry should still be at least 500 words long. You have over four months until the week begins and plenty of time afterward if you don't finish in time. That's plenty of time to write 500 words. I don't think that's too much to ask.) If you're writing fanfic, I REALLY would prefer you post your fics on AO3 or Fanfiction.net and provide a link to your story, but if you must post on Tumblr itself, please make use of the "Read More" option.

Fanart should be a completed drawing. (Any fanart portraying nudity or anything of an R/NC-17 nature should be cropped if immediately visible on your Tumblr post and/or posted with the appropriate community label. You can post the full image under a "Read More" or provide a link to the image on another site.)

Graphics, image boards, playlists, cosplay photos, crafts, meta/essays, etc. are also welcome!

Comments, kudos, and reblogs are encouraged, but don't be a jerk! If you're not a fan of a pairing, please just ignore and move on.

On Tumblr, if you tag #smrarepairweek2024, I will reblog your post. I'll tag explict art and fics reblogs as #nsfw, so feel free to block that tag if you'd rather not see those posts.

Please do not post your works anywhere until the day dedicated to your chosen theme. An AO3 collection has now been set up for this year's event. (Adding your work to the collection will not be required.) If you'd like to look back at the last event's works, the 2023 collection can be found here.

And here is the 2022 collection.

Themes

Day 1: Magic/Mundane Day 2: Hugs/Kisses Day 3: Fire/Ice Day 4: Music/Silence Day 5: Birth/Death Day 6: Break-Up/Make-Up Day 7: Free

(Event Organizer: @kaleidodreams)

[crinkled-emotions]

jake + 25 (from the 2022 list) or Jake + 1 (2024 list)

maybe with bradley as unwilling/less than thrilled caretaker if you’d like? (or not i don’t really mind im just happy to be here hehe💛💛)

Anon please know I never forgot this, it just took me so much longer because I dislocated my shoulder at reformer pilates 🤦‍♂️. I also went away for three weeks but that's mostly unrelated.

Jake + 1 "I'm not hungover, just sick" (or vice versa)

I saw twisters before I went to Victoria for a month and GIRL (gn) if I wasn't so stale with my writing I'd be smashing out all the fics about that dude with a huge... cowboy hat.

Resting his body against the doorframe to the ensuite in a move all too familiar, Rooster raised an eyebrow.

"How many did you have last night?"

Hangman, better known as Jake, sweetheart, or asshole depending on who he was terrorising, slowly lifted his head from the toilet.

"Roo, didn't you ever learn it's rude to ask a lady that?"

Bradley leaned down, offering him a hand.

"Nothing's rude when it's you. C'mon, I've got toast for you."

Jake grumbled, wrapping an arm around Bradley's shoulder and letting him take most of his weight as they headed for their bedroom door. His stomach flipped and Jake grasped Bradley's shoulder.

"Stop, wait."

Rooster did as asked, frowning as he rubbed slow circles on his partner's back. They stood still for a moment while Jake tried to keep his insides... inside. Considering it was still relatively early in the morning, they could afford to take the morning routine at a slower pace.

"I'm gonna puke again," Jake complained. Bradley sighed, turning them back toward the bathroom.

-

Taking a seat beside Rooster in the meeting room, Phoenix leaned over to whisper to him.

"Hangman was really drunk last night; you two good?"

"Yeah, everything's fine. I didn't realise he was that fucked up."

"Dude."

Phoenix sent Rooster a look, reaching for her pen.

"Do you not remember when he landed himself on your lap and didn't say a word for the rest of the night?"

Rooster did in fact remember that; he'd been in the middle of a conversation with Coyote and Bob when Jake had ambled over and plonked himself right on Bradley's lap. He'd then turned his head from the group and stayed there the rest of the night. In all honesty, Bradley just figured the alcohol had hit him a little harder than he'd expected but he couldn't remember Jake drinking that much.

"And then when he puked in the parking lot-"

That Bradley didn't remember.

"Wait- what?"

Phoenix's eyebrows furrowed and she tilted her head.

"Wait; did Jake not tell you?"

"When was this?"

Phoenix thought for a moment.

"It was really early. Fanboy ran back to his truck to grab his wallet and saw Jake tossing cookies."

Rooster checked the time on his phone, glancing toward the door. Jake had said he was going to the bathroom before their meeting but that had been almost ten minutes ago. Phoenix gently nudged his side.

"Go see if he's okay."

"I hate when he doesn't tell me shit. I'll be back."

Rooster stood, grabbing his water bottle from his bag and exiting the meeting room.

-

The men's room was a little too quiet for Bradley to be confident Jake wasn't in there. For someone who was the life of every party ever, the minute he wasn't feeling well he got... sneaky. Bradley was so used to it he walked to the furthest stall from the entrance to the bathrooms and gently knocked on the door.

"Can you let me in?" He requested. The lock clicked and Bradley found Jake sitting on the closed toilet lid, looking mildly unimpressed.

"Do you know my dump schedule or something?"

"Sure. C'mon, I'm taking you home."

"Did you clear it with Maverick?"

Bradley raised an eyebrow as if to say dude c'mon. Jake stood.

"Fine."

"Fine," Rooster mocked as he put his arm around Jake's waist and led him out of the (mildly disgusting) bathrooms. As an afterthought he swiped his hand across his boyfriend's forehead and Jake instantly recoiled.

"What are you, my mother?"

"Your mom doesn't hold a candle to me."

They shared a look. Jake stepped back into Bradley's arms, silent as the taller of the pair directed them to the exit.

-

"Now, here's what I'm thinking."

"Wow, did it hurt?"

"That's so cute."

Rooster leaned on the doorframe to the bathroom in a manner similar to that morning with an unamused look on his face, down to only wearing his boxers and a t-shirt. They'd come home and Jake had immediately started vomiting again (in the laundry sink, of all the places) so Bradley had called out for the day, a little worried he'd missed something a little more severe than a mildly unimpressed stomach. When they'd migrated upstairs it had triggered another bout of dry heaving. Jake, having shifted from on his knees by the toilet to sitting beside it with his eyes closed, grimaced.

"If I ever give Tasha shit for puking when she's drunk again, shoot me."

"Never."

Bradley stopped by the sink to grab a damp washcloth and, in a move he remembered his mom doing when he was younger, gently placed it on the back of Jake's neck.

"Are you going to be a pain in the ass if I take you to urgent care tonight?"

"I suddenly feel better," Jake deadpanned. His eyes remained closed. Bradley sighed.

"I expected as much. Go get in bed, I'll get you water."

"Roos."

Rooster paused, brushing his hand through his boyfriend's hair.

"I know."

-

It was like the world stopped spinning the second Jake got himself horizontal in bed. He'd been up and down all night, desperate not to wake his insomniac at best boyfriend, making frantic dashes in order not to hurl on the carpet in their bedroom. By the time Bradley's alarm had gone off there had been no hiding the smell of puke in their ensuite and the jig was up. Considering the night before, Bradley had just assumed he was hungover and that was how Jake wanted it. If he was hungover Bradley tended to be a lot less sympathetic and the last thing Jake wanted was to worry him.

Lying flat on his back, eyes closed, he kind of wished Bradley wasn't such a good person. It could be suffocating sometimes, coming from parents who were emotionally detached at best, to someone who loved with their whole heart. When Jake brought up how easy Bradley found it to love people he always credited his mom and her big heart.

"Here, I got water and crackers."

Jake opened his eyes just enough to catch a glimpse of said boyfriend coming into their room, pausing by his side of the bed with something before rounding to Jake and gently cupping the back of his neck.

"Sit up, you need to drink some of this."

Jake did as asked, relieved when Bradley's hand didn't move from it's spot. He offered the bottle of water and Jake hesitantly took a couple of sips, grimacing when it lit a spark of nausea and impending doom in him. When he didn't start gagging again he had another few sips then handed it back to his boyfriend. Bradley sat on the edge of the bed by his legs, squeezing Jake's hand.

"How are you feeling?"

"Rough," Jake finally admitted, "I thought I was hungover."

"I'm sorry, baby, I thought you were hungover too. How long have you been feeling like this?"

Jake shrugged.

"Couple days- the puking started last night, Roos, I swear if it started earlier I wouldn't have been drinking."

"Gatorade coming your way."

Bradley handed over the bottle, cool enough to soothe his throat but not enough to make his stomach hurt. Jake took slow sips, leaning against his boyfriend's shoulder when Bradley shifted to sit beside him.

"I'm just hungover," Bradley scoffed with a snort as he reached for his phone. Jake elbowed him in the ribs.

"Don't be mean, I'm sick."

"And now he's sick!"

"Roos."

Jake levelled his boyfriend with his best innocent face and Bradley sighed as he pulled Jake into his side.

"You're lucky you're not an asshole all the time."

[lesdeuxxx]

ATTENTION PEOPLE: MISSING FANFIC SEARCH:

So this is going to be very incredibly confusing, but I’m searching for this fic I read a really long time ago. In light of the possibility ao3 gets banned, I’m going to save fics that I think deserve to be preserved like the literature they are. This includes fics that I read previously and really liked. However, I’m having trouble finding this Heartstopper fic I read ages ago back when I was still in the fandom and do not remember the title of. I fear it may have been deleted. But regardless, I will shout into the void and hope and pray someone knows the fic I’m taking about and can maybe send me the link. So here’s a plot recap:

It’s set during the Christmas season. Charlie is homeless. He breaks into nicks shed to steal power tools to pawn them for money but nick catches him, and feels bad. Slowly over time they become friends, and nick does what he can to help Charlie. The early chapters im blanking on but it gets interesting much later. Charlie stays with nick after a lot of convincing and they lie to nicks parents (who in this fic, are still together-nicks father is a cop.) and say he goes to truham. Christmas rolls around and nick (I think) fakes sick to stay home while his parents travel or see relatives or something, and Charlie spends a few days with nick alone in the house. Charlie also plays the violin for some reason, which nick happens to have and gifts to Charlie because he never uses it. Charlie grows insecure about “using�� nick and eventually runs off, feeling as though he is a nuisance, and so he goes back to the street. His violin gets stolen by some street rats who beat him up, but nick goes out searching for him and throws the street rats off, leading to him and Charlie having to escape and hide in an abandoned apartment Charlie stays in some times. But when you think everything’s okay, the third act happens and Ben comes into play, who is a much older drug dealer who takes advantage of Charlie being in a bad position to have an abusive relationship with him. Charlie tries to go to Elle and Tao, who he met through Ben, and who try to hide him but ultimately he’s sniffed out and Ben takes him when his goons and him storm elle and Tao’s apartment. There’s some sort of fight in I think a motel and and nick gets him back. Imogen is also there, I don’t really remember when she is or what she does until the end, when we find out she went with Ben who is now technically a kidnapper, and nicks cop father has to swat Ben to take him out, and he goes to jail cause turns out he killed Charlie’s mom because she was (I think) verbally abusive to Charlie and it’s what leads to them being together.

Also, a couple random plot points I remember but don’t know where to place include:

-charlie constantly wears a thin denim jacket that later gets traded with one of nicks old puffer coats

-he runs into Tara and Darcy drawing graffiti under a bridge and joins them. If I remember correctly, Darcy was kicked out by her mom and Tara has a shit home life.

-Charlie goes with nicks mom to one of his rugby games and they talk I think

-nick and Charlie have a date where they go to some sort of Christmas fair and I think go ice skating

-Ben may or may not have been drugging and pimping out Charlie, and I think that’s like the main reason why he freaks out about Imogen is cause he’s worried it’ll happen to her?

-when Ben brings Charlie to the hotel, he shoot’s up heroin

The fic was posted during the holiday season, I do remember that. As for the year, I’m not sure, but I would say it’s likely to be either from December 2021 or 2022.

If ANYONE remembers anything about this fic, the name, the author, anything at all, please comment below. I remember it was an incredible story and I know I would feel incredible guilt if I couldn’t find it again while I’m on the hunt to preserve my favorite fics before the government might take them away from me.

[letswrites]

LN- All roads lead to you

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Masterlist

-----------------------------------------------------------Last chapter! I made a little text in the end, please read it. Also, I found a song I used to listen to when I was younger and it fits perfectly to the story. I will link it at the end (so there're no spoilers) if you like to listen to it.

Without further ado, enjoy :)

-----------------------------------------------------------

Chapter 8 (final): Austin... again (feat. Mexico City)

October, 10th, 2022

Guangzhou Baiyun International Airport, Guangzhou, China:

10:38 PM

Since Suzuka, she hasn't heard about Lando. He said he would text her but he didn't. At first, she didn't even notice cause she woke up late and almost lost the start of the race. After that, she went out with Pierre and Yuki, some Yuki friends, and Daniel for a round (or many rounds) of sake. As a result, she ended up with a bad hangover and an early flight to Amsterdam with a stopover in China. And of course with an Australian lad on her hair.

She was sitting next to Daniel with a chai latte in her hands. She had her hoodie on and sunglasses for the hangover "I should have never drank that amount of sake" "Me neither, Dan. Me neither" in that moment, in that cold airport in China with a Starbucks cup burning her fingertips, she remembered she had a phone. She opened Whatsapp and looked into her messages, she scrolled down the screen and stopped at Lando's contact. The last message from him was October, 8th at 6:18 PM: 'I'm already here :)'. Which took her to the question mark expression on her face. 1 day, 17 hours, and 20 minutes and Lando didn't say a word to her. He said he would text on the race day. "Son of a bitch" "Hey, Dan" he hummed "Do you know about Lando?" "What do you mean?" "Don't hear about him since classification day" "Do you talk frequently?" "No, but... What do you know about him?" "Well, the last time I saw him was at Suzuka on race day. He was a little off, you know?" "Off?" "Yes, like his head was in another place". She turned white like a ghost. Just as he was when left the hotel room. Fuck.  "Oh! Do you think he is okay?" "I've no idea. Why?" "He told me he was going to text me, but he didn't" "Did you fall on his web?" "I... No! He was supposed to text me about a resort in Mexico. I told him the other day I will spend a week in Cancun and two in Punta Cana, he already has been there so he told me he was texting me some tips". Daniel looked at her and nodded his head "Did you sleep with Lando, didn't you?" She took off her sunglasses and looked into the Aussie man's eyes "Yes, twice" "Nooo, darling! You weren't supposed to sleep with Lando! He's in his fuckboy era" "Exactly why I slept with him" she wore the sunglasses again "You are not expecting him to be romantic are you?" She kept silent "What have he told you?" "It's not what he said, it's what he did" "What?" "He took me to a winter Sakura festival in Tokyo" "But it's not winter" "exactly, he paid for it" he widened his eyes "You were naive. People like Lando right now would do anything to have sex with their current target" she thought about Abu Dhabi but Daniel didn't have to know about it "Especially him that have a lot of money to spend and a lot of targets to hit" she was about to retort but Daniel probably was right "Should I text him?" "You can do it but then you will be just one more girl who doesn't know how to have a casual relationship based on sex for him". she looked at his contact "Probably yes" and blocked her phone again. She sipped on her chai and laid her head on Daniels's shoulder "I just want to go to drain all the sake from my bloodstream" He chuckled "did you imagine Yuki drank like that?" "Not in a thousand lives" "We should have taken him to Amsterdam with us" Daniel huffed "The kid would go crazy".

//

A week later

October, 23th, 2022

Circuit of The Americas, Austin, Texas.

She watched from distance Lando giggling with a group of giggly girls. "Does he think I am cool?" She asked herself "Because it's been 14 dias since we texted the last time. And he doesn't seem to care". In her opinion, they were just both too proud for it. But apparently, he still had the same habits. When the girls dispersed, she approached the McLaren's driver and touched his right shoulder without saying a word. He turned and a silly smile on his face seemed to fade away. He took a moment to fake another smile "Oh, hi!" "Hi, Lando" "How are you? I... I am sorry for not texting you. I was going to but..." He hoped she would complete his phrase so he wouldn't need to invent an excuse himself but he got nothing but silence "I was busy, you know?" "Really?" she said with an incredulous tone "You were busy? For 2 weeks? So busy you couldn't even send me a voice message?" "Well... Yes!" "Like right now?" "Hum?" "The girls" "what about them?" "You have been busy like you were with them?" He didn't have to say anything, he couldn't hide the truth. At least not from her. "If you wanted to talk to me, why didn't you just text?" "I had the feeling I wouldn't get anything but an empty answer after 5 days of an agonizing wait" "I don't know why are you acting like that. If you came here to be rude with me you should have stayed home" wow. How rude could Lando be when he was defensive? She decided to act like an adult because one of them needed and clearly Lando was not going to be the one "I just wanted to talk, didn't mean to be rude" she said in the most neutral voice tone she could find. He took a few seconds to listen to the words he had said to her and took a deep breath to calm himself. "What do you want to talk about?" "What happened? I mean, you felt distant when you came back to the store in Tokyo. I thought it was just an initial shock and you were tired but you just missed. You always do that when we finally get along. Why?" She knew he was afraid of commitment but she wanted to hear his perspective "I was going to text you in Suzuka but I was not good and I knew I would make you feel upset too, so I just took some time to myself to think" "In which conclusion did you get?" "None really" "none?" "I mean, I know I want you. I just still struggle to make it only the two of us. Then you come and get jealous because I was with some girls and it becomes even more difficult" he was pissed "I just don't like when you flirt with other girls in front of me. It makes me feel insecure" "No worries, next time I'll flirt with them out of your sigh" She took a deep breath, she was opening herself to him, talking about her feelings, and being vulnerable and he was making jokes about it"I was just flirting, what's the matter?" "What's the matter?" she chuckled, almost without patience already "yeah, I was not touching anyone or doing anything but flirt. What's so bad about it? Also, if you feel insecure, that's your problem, not mine" "What do you think a relationship is about?"

"You're aware we are not a couple, right?". She had enough. She asked Lando to talk not to fight but he was crossing all the fine lines that existed between them already "Yeah. I was good with living with that but when you came to my house and said you wanted to be in my life again, or when you asked me to a 'second first date' as you denominated it, and paid for having a damn festival only because I wanted to see the fucking sakura, when we were so intimate..." her voice failed fue the tears she was holding back "I thought you at least wanted to be one" "You know what?" Lando licked his lips and started "you used to make things lighter but now every time we are together it's the same shit about other girls and relationships, and it turns out you just make everything even heavier now!" When he finished the last word, all he could see were wavy eyes and hurt feelings. She turned bet back to him and started to distance herself from him. Both physically and emotionally. Then she stopped to say one more thing to the British man "You are being an asshole. If you want me to walk away, you should say it. It would make things way easier" She said seriously and rawly, and continued to walk. Lando crossed too many lines with her already. He threw his head back and sighed, frustrated "Fuck".

...

Later that day:

"Can you, please, eat something?" "You know I don't like eating before racing," he said, nihilistically "Lando" he had an arm stretched on the table with his head laying on it. Without giving himself the effort to move an inch, he grumbled something that should sound like a "Hum?" "Are you alright, love?" Charlotte asked, sincerely concerned with the younger one "I am just not in the mood for eating" he had been like that since the fight. It didn't make him any better person. To get even worse he couldn't take her out of his mind. "Are you sure?" "Yeah. I'm fine" "I understand you don't want to eat, but you must do it" The blonde lady did not get any answer "If you don't, you can faint in the car and cause a big crash". Not a single word left the Britishman's lips. "I ain't going to let that happen" he sighed, knowing Charlotte was not only right, but wasn't going to let that go till he ate something.

He lifted his head and stretched his arm and spine "You're right! I'll eat, ok?" "Can I trust you?" "Can you start to really trust me? Cause I know you don't really mean when you say you do" "It would be easier if you acted as someone I can really trust" "It would be easier if you really trusted me!" Why none women trust him? "Lando!" "I'll eat" "Good! Thanks". Charlotte was going to enter another topic when his peripheric vision caught her frame. Should he invite her for lunch? Yeah! That's the best way to make amends: eating in a nice restaurant with good company. He stood up in a sudden move "Okay, okay. See you later, Charlie" "I didn't finish talking!" but he wasn't listening anymore.

He walked toward her and touched her right shoulder, lightly. Just like she did with him before. She turned to him, and her smile faded away. Just like he did with her before. He hadn't noticed before, but she was dressed as a cowgirl. Like those girls who go to rodeos. She had a pink glittery tank top, denim shorts, in a pocket the words cowboy pillow laid with humor on her left glute, long black cowboy boots, and a black hat with some pink details on the sides. She looked amazing and he could handle not having her again. "Hey... You look beautiful. I mean you always are but this outfit makes you look..." She cut him "What do you want?" "What are you doing here?" "Going to watch the race. Last year I missed it cause someone made me very upset. But this year I won't let anyone get in my way" he knew what she was talking about "I know that. But... right now. Did you have lunch already?" "Yes, with Dan" "Oh! What about dinner can I take you out to dinner?" "No" "Why not" "I don't want to. And I am going to have dinner with someone already" "You what?!" "What's wrong?" "With who?" "A guy I know" "Is it because of what I told you?" "Why else would it be about?" "You're acting childly" she leaned forward and said close to his face "You know we are not a couple, right?" "Sorry for that" "No, you're right. We are not a couple. So you can flirt with your girls and I can have dinner with this guy". For the first time, he understood how she felt during all the period they'd been together "But..." her phone started to ring: 'Giaro 💛💛'.

"The hot Italian model?!" he thought "And he has two hearts?!" "I should pick this up before I make you feel even heavier. Excuse me". Was he her date? She must be kidding him. He could feel the vendetta running in her veins, this could be the only reason she would do something cheeky as it. "You're not going to win this one," he said to himself while staring at her laughing at the phone call.

"Have you eaten already?" Charlotte asked him out of the blue "Fuck! Don't show up like that!" he placed a hand on his chest "Not yet. I'm going now" "I'll join you just for assurance" "See? You don't trust me!".

...

At night:

He was going crazy alone in that hotel room. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, all dressed up to go out, in his hand was his phone. He waited desperately for a call or text from her. "She's crazy" he mumbled to himself "I am the one looking like crazy" he stopped to shake his leg "Fuck it!" he stood up, grabbed his wallet, and hotel key, and walked out the door. Now he had a free pass from her to flirt with other girls "Why am I still here?" he mumbled to himself inside the elevator. Hoping he would forget all of this when he first stepped into the club.

But nothing really changed. Even with all the alcohol in his bloodstream. He was trying to think about the models around him but his mind went back to her. When a blonde lady "accidentally" touched her fingertips on the back of his hand, he couldn't stop thinking about her hand touching another guy's hand over the table. When a brunette touched his knee softly, all he could think was about her knee touching another man's knee under the table. The worst one was when a freckled redhead brushed her ass on his pelvis and he only imagined the Italian's bodies colliding together in bed. Damn. How could he party with those thoughts in his mind? So he decided to call it a night and went back to the hotel. He lost the count of how many times he thought about calling her. Or send that voice message she wanted him to send so much. Or how many drinks he pushed down his throat thinking about her. He even thought he was hallucinating when he passed by a restaurant near the hotel and saw her. It was her and a very handsome guy.

They were all giggly to each other and without his control, a jealous, furious, and drunk version of himself walked toward the table, grabbed her wrist, pulled her against his chest, ignored all her protests, jumped in the pool, and then kissed her. Kissed her fully, desperately, possesively. His tongue danced on her mouth, and his grip on her waist felt so perfect, that he was shivering. Maybe because of the cold water but mainly because of her body. They had no air anymore but his numb neurons didn't care. She felt another hand pulling her from against Lando and bringing her to the surface. Then the same hand pulled Lando to the surface and punched him in the nose. She took the biggest breath of the whole weekend and separated Giaro from Lando before the British man could punch him back "Stop!". She realized how that scene was looking: two grown-up men punching each other like two high school boys, one of them bleeding in the pool of a fancy and expensive grilling restaurant, and a girl who was almost crying in between them. She looked around: everyone looked catatonic.

"Why did I do this, stupid?" he asked himself, now he's going to kill me "Lando! What the fuck?" He tried to touch her wrist but she splashed some water on him and went out of that pool "Ti chiamo dopo, Giaro" "Vuoi un aiuto, bella?" "No, lasciami stare. Si? E anche lui, per favore" "Okay" the Italian man nodded, without agreeing but he would respect her decision. Lando also got off the pool to chase her. "E io mi occupo di tutto questo disordine. Solo" Giaro complained to himself.

...

"Hey!" Lando shouted "Please, wait!" She stopped, impatient "So. Explain yourself, idiot! What the fuck do you have on your mind?" "Did you see what your guy did to me?" she couldn't believe he was victimizing himself. She looked into his eyes "You deserved! You deserved even more! What's wrong with you?! What was your plan? Throw me in a pool and then kill both of us asphyxiated? So we would die together and kiss for eternity" "I don't know why I've done this, sorry!" "I'm tired of it! You keep on this 'want me, don't want me' game. 'Want to be with me and 7 more girls at a time, want to be with me only'. You tell me we are not a couple, I go out with a friend I've known since I was 7, you freak out and now your nose is bleeding, Giaro's fist is hurt and my dress is wet!" "I already apologized!" "You are such a confusing person that you are turning me into a confusing person as well! Do you know that?" A friend. They are friends. "I just don't want you to be with other guys" he said, ashamed of himself the same way she did before when they first fought "But you can be with everyone you want to?" "Yes. I know that's fucked up but... it's how I truly feel" "Fuck it! I don't want to be next to you right now. Or ever again" She turned her back to leave, but he held her arm " Wait!" "No!" she retreated with her arm "I'd enough of you already. Please, don't look out for me anymore", then she walked away from him.

Lando ended the night drunk, alone, with blood on his new white shirt and with water on his trainers. The opposite of what he thought it would be. He stared at his phone, her name with a pink heart in front of it. He never had the opportunity to show her. Or to confirm if she liked pink. He scrolled to his contacts and called Max Fewtrell "I think I fucked up everything this time".

//

October, 31st, 2022

Mexico City, Mexico

Lando thought she was going to be in the race but he was mistaken, cause when Sunday came and she did not appear there. She posted a picture from the airplane and wrote right above Mexico City. It turns out she was there for other business.

The day before race, Lando was following Daniel around the hotel "Daniel, you must tell me" "Bro, I don't know what you are talking about" "You do know. I know she's in Mexico, she posted on her social media" "Why don't you simply ask her?" "She wouldn't pick up the phone, or text back. And even if she does, she wouldn't tell me where she is" "So I shouldn't tell you" "Daniel" he stopped in front of the Aussie man, forcing him to stop walking, and held his shoulders "I am trying to fix the shit I've done. Can you, please, help me?" "You should have texted her when you told you would" "I know that but I decided to change, to fix everything. But I need you to tell me where she is" Daniel could see the despair in Lando's eyes. He could see he was up to do anything to find her, with or without Daniel's help. He huffed "She's at Costa Esmeralda" "Where?!" "Is in Veracruz" Lando grabbed his phone and started to search "La Guadalupe beach, you'll find her there" "4 hours?! Shit. Thanks, Dan" Daniel held his wrist "Don't do more damage than you already have done" "It's what I intend to"

...

October , 31st, 2022

Playa La Guadalupe, Costa Esmeralda, Veracruz, Mexico

She was standing looking at the ocean, she knew he was coming, Daniel warned her. And when the time came, when a hand found its way to her left shoulder, she knew it was him. She turned around and protected her eyes from the Sun with her forearm"You really can't do what people tell you to, can you?". He remembered the phone call with Max in Austin:

' "Max?" "It's pretty early here in the UK just for you to know and maybe consider calling another time. Just maybe" "I think I really fucked up everything this time" Max could feel the sadness in his voice "Have you been crying?" "Yes" his voice failed "Yes, I did" "What happened?" "I told her I would text but I didn't, today we met in Austin, and she came to talk to me, I said very rude things, such as "You make my life even heavier than already is" and she went out with a guy to make me jealous but they were just friends, I went out, got drunk, jumped in a restaurant pool with her, almost killed her drowned, her friend punched my nose and she said she never wants to see me again" Max definitely needed more information about the chaotic 24 hours Lando had in Austin but he didn't need to hear anything more not even a syllable for getting into the conclusion he already has gotten back in last year's Austin: they were no good to each other "Lando..." he took a deep breath " What do you want me to say?" "What do I do now?" "You leave her alone" "What?!" "You stop calling, texting, chasing her. You stop appearing in her house and you stop following and stalking her on social media. That's what you do now" "Why should I do that if I love her?" it was the first time he admitted that out loud "You do even if you love her, you guys can only hurt each other. You know that, I know that, and she knows that too". How could Max tell him something like that? He got angry with his roommate "You are a very shit adviser. Good night, Max" and hung up on the British lad's face. Max already expected that behavior from Lando. He also knew he would realize it was the right thing to do, sooner or later.'

Lando's head went back to the present "No, I can't" "What now, Lando? What rude things will you tell me now?" "You were right. I've been acting confusingly. I'm sorry, I'll do better from now. I'll be better for you" "No, you won't. We both know you won't" his eyes started to get wavy "Don't do this" She placed her hand on his face "We both will go crazy like that" he placed his hand over hers "It must have another way. I'll..." he tried to think but his mind was in shortcircuit "...stop going out, I won't..." Everything was a blank space in the moment he realized the reality "...even look to other girls, I'll do everything you tell me to do, be only yours..." "Will you change yourself entirely just to fit in my standards?" then he heard himself, she was right. She shouldn't diminish her standards for him, she didn't deserve any less than what she demanded from him since they first met. And he shouldn't change himself to be with her. They were simply incompatible "Please..." he whispered "We need to" she smiled with her lips "But don't worry. If we're meant to be, all roads will lead me to you" he smiled, a tear rolling down his face "By now we must follow different paths, yes?" He dried the tears that rolled down and swallowed the rest of them "I believe it's the best" she smiled "Come here" She opened her arms for a hug and he pulled her against his bare chest. He held her tightly, he breathed all of her in. Intoxicating himself for the last time. When he let her go, she held his hand "Good luck in Brazil" and started to walk away. He held her hand till the last finger slipped away "Thanks" "Bye, Lando" she waved "Bye bye" he waved back and watched her fade away to the shore.

He took a deep breath and switched his gaze to the ocean, he saw the waves come and go but never die. Maybe they were waves and maybe now that he let her go he could be a better person, a better version of himself, and so does she. Till fate join them together again, if it was meant to be.

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Taglist:

@cmleitora

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First of all, the song I mentioned ;)

In second place, I want to show you guys who Giaro is. I know him from Martin Garrix's music video lions in the wild but I don't know if Lando and him actually know each other in real life. I just think he is handsome enough to cause jealousy and he's Italian, so it fitted perfectly.

So, I know most of you expected a happy ending for them. I confess it was the plan when I first started to write this story but it happens that during the process I fell in love with someone with whom I had a complicated relationship, quite very similar to the relationship I wrote for them. Very ironic, no? I will never write about a toxic relationship again lol But the thing here is: I suffered so much till the moment it was decided to call it an end and when I started to work again on ARLTY I couldn't simply put a happy ending to it cause I couldn't let other people read it and maybe have the empty hope that everything was going to be alright at the end (like I did for so long). If you are in a situation like that or know someone who is in a situation like that DO NOT postpone something that is too broken and bruised already. You can't be happy if you have to change yourself or your standards completely to be with someone. So if you all take a time to reflect you'll see that the end was happy. For both, they were free to pursue relationships that would make them truly happy and meet their needs.

It was so good for me to write this one. It's so personal to me (and also has some parts in which I literally narrated my life) that it healed me and it freed me during the process. I can only thank everyone for the support and, of course, please don't send me death threats because of the end lmao

Also, I want to reinforce that I really like Lando, I'm a big fan of him, and this is only fiction and I really hope he's not like this in real life haha

I look forward to writing more fics, maybe about Charles now 🤭 what do you think?

Anyway, thanks for your company till the end and I really hope you liked the story and learned something with it. Lemme know!

A warm hug,

Lets 💜

[brokendarkfairyempressforever]

Please don't get mad and go off on me just listen

okay so I was homeless like more than a year ago

It was awful and terrifying and now I have more trauma to add in my big book of traumas'

Almost got raped

Being homeless is scary as heck

Please stop treating people who are homeless as crap

They're people and they deserve to be treated one

We were homeless because before my dad left he didn't pay the rent for months and we didn't know until like 7 months later when the landlord told us. We also been paying the rent after he left. She seemed understanding of our situation. At least we thought. Around my first week of school first week of me being a freshman in highschool she said she's going to kick us out until we pay the missing rent the rent that my dad didn't pay that we didn't know about and when we found out she said it was OKAY THAT SHE UNDERSTOOD. She said we have until the end of October to move out. We begged her to understand my mom is a single mom, my sister had to drop out of college to help pay the debt my dad left. It was impossible for them to be able to pay that large amount. She then said we have until the end of December. She kicked us out on November 15th 2022. We had almost everything packed. We found a place we just needed to settle a few things. We were almost there. She kicked us out more than a month early. The house we were going to rent said no at the last minute. We were at the streets. A month later we found a shelter at this hotel. They had a section for the homeless. They gave us expired food. I got food poisoning multiple times. My immune system is non existent at this point. They rarely had halal food but at least they tried. We had a court case. And the land lord god that effing woman won because she's rich. Literally the only reason. She unpacked our things and messed it up to show how we're bad people. No one cared that my dad was the one who created this mess. Who cares right he's a man. And we're 3 girls and a child and we're poor, brown, south Asian, and muslim. She kept almost all of our things even things that we just had for memories. She took everything, every belonging she took and gave us empty bags and boxes. This lady by the way has 3 houses in the Hamptons, but who cares right? Ramadan was a nightmare the amount of days we didn't get food. I don't even want to remember. Then in the middle of Ramadan my county shut down that shelter since it was "hindering the hotel's business". So they shipped us to the only shelter in my county. I got sick a lot but I still had to go to school cause I was sick every couple weeks. They never had halal food and the masjid when they had leftovers the workers there wouldn't give it to us. Only one of the shelter worker cared for us and when she could she gave us the food. I pray for her everyday. We never really got food. I had little brother too I would give we would give most of the food we got to him. The my mom sister and me would share but I know they gave me a little more. Then around the end of Ramadan our social worker at the shelter was able to get us an apartment. It's been rocky since then but at least we have somewhat stable housing. We're definitely really lucky and fortunate. We thank Allah(God) every day.

I'm telling you this story because you don't know what people go through. You don't know the reasons why people are homeless. You don't know what they go through. So please help and understand and give us at least human decency.

And open more homeless shelters. Make them safer. Give food that you would give everyone else. Make food accessible for people with allergies and religious restrictions. Make it easier for people to go find work and education. Don't restrict their rights. It's all I'm asking

Anyway I'm just asking for the world to be kinder, respectful, understand to all people of this world.

[qqueenofhades]

I don’t know if this is just because I’ve curated my feeds to show me this, but I actually have a sliver of hope that we may stay blue because of all the kids who will be voting age in 2024 being FIRED TF UP against all the human rights violations the republicans are passing/want to pass into law and like. I don’t want the kids to save us. They shouldn’t frickin have to. But if republicans keep being such raging assholes, if they can hold onto that anger until 2024… they just frickin might. I’m genuinely terrified what will happen if they DO NOT, but I have seen so many late-teens-early-20s kids getting out and voting in local elections and doing other things* that helps that I really, really hope they bring that energy to the 2024 election even if our choices are “old white guy who is Actually Doing Okay (could be better but not Genuinely Evil)” and “Orange Incoherent Criminal” or “ Literal Fascist Wannabe Dictator that everyone else actually hates”

(Also, do I wish we had a better option than Biden? Sure. But he’s not doing nearly as bad as a lot of people INCLUDING DEMS want us to believe. Like no maybe he’s not MANY things, but what he is doing is pretty darn good and big and it’s not actual genocide so like. Can we all suck it up ONE MORE TIME PLEASE???)

(*the biggest energy I saw was with the Tennessee Three and I’m like PLEASE BRING THAT ENERGY TO THE PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION I AM BEGGING YOU)

I mean... like I keep saying, the Republicans aren't trying so hard to outlaw voting because they truly think their policies are popular and people legitimately want to vote for them. They have lost the popular vote in every presidential election except one (2004) since the start of this century, and yet in that time, we have still had 12 years of GOP presidents, because the Electoral College sucks anti-democratic donkey dick so hard.

Likewise, yes: if we get our act together and vote in equal or higher numbers than 2020 and 2022, we will probably-to-definitely win. A turnout of just 27% of Gen Z voters stopped the Red Wave in 2022, so if yknow, a few more of them would do so in 2024, that would be nice. Republican policies are toxically unpopular with young people, but these are often also those most susceptible to "evil Democrats/both sides bad" anti-voting propaganda, so it's not always clear how this adds up to extra points for Team Blue.

Anyway, at this point, it's still too early to know what the hell will happen between now and November 2024, how Felonies Georg's charges numbering possibly in the literal hundreds will affect the race, or any of that. As ever, however, we do know that the crazies WILL vote en masse, like they always do, and it is up to us to do our part.

[milfjagger]

okay so... give us the list of folk horror films that are good please. 🤲

ok this took a while but here we go! it ended up being more than 10 lol

the wicker man (1973) - the definitive british folk horror film. midsommar wants to be the wicker man soooo bad it's embarrassing

the blood on satan's claw (1971) - i haven't seen this one in a long time but it's a pretty chilling early 70s british film centring around a demonic cult in 18th century england

night of the demon (1957) - ok so you know the sample at the beginning of hounds of love by kate bush, where a voice says "it's in the trees! it's coming!" that's from this film!!!! just barely in the folk horror category but it's based on a story by m.r. james who is one of THE iconic folk horror writers so imo it counts

a warning to the curious (1972) - also based on a story by m.r. james, this was part of a long-running annual bbc series called 'a ghost story for christmas'. it's only about 30 minutes long and very dated but I think that gives it extra charm and even a bit of extra creepiness

the juniper tree (1990) - icelandic retelling of the grimm's fairy tale, starring björk and featuring an incredibly beautiful soundtrack

the company of wolves (1984) - based on the short stories of angela carter in her compilation 'the bloody chamber'. this is probably more fairytale horror than folk horror but i LOVE this film and if you like intense psychosexual overtones and incredible practical effects then you will too

the devil rides out (1968) - classic hammer horror with christopher lee so you know it's gonna be a banger

wake wood (2009) - probably the most underrated irish horror film of all time (and that's saying a lot bc there really aren't many). really scary film with the "came back but wrong" premise. watch this one

the hallow (2013) - another one from ireland. it's not amazing but including it bc i don't think i've ever seen another horror film fully embrace the idea that faeries are actually terrifying. practical effects are also cool as hell

kill list (2011) - i'll be honest with you I didn't understand half of what was happening in this film and it's been on my to-rewatch list for ages. it starts out as a cerebral cop drama and descends into absolute madness like it literally has to be seen to be believed

a field in england (2013) - probably the modern folk horror film that comes closest to what british directors were doing with the genre in the 70s. it's trippy, impenetrable and often kinda funny, i really recommend this one

pyewacket (2017) - offbeat canadian indie film that you will either find really creepy or really boring. i thought the ending in particular was incredibly chilling

the ritual (2017) - i feel like everyone has seen this film at this point but i had to recommend it anyway bc it blends folk horror with monster movie and it's super fucking terrifying. i also highly recommend the novel by adam neville which if anything is even scarier

the witch (2015) - again everyone has seen this and has an opinion but it's one of my favourite horror films of all time

pet sematary (1989) - the iconic stephen king classic that is still really scary to this day

pumpkinhead (1988) - another film that is super underrated imo. people who love the creature design in the ritual should remember the OG

men (2022) - controversial opinion perhaps but i think this film was actually kinda brilliant. if nothing else it is super twisted and horrifying

on my list of i haven't watched this yet but people say it's really good: penda's fen (1974), witchfinder general (1968), the lair of the white worm (1988) (i know i know i call myself a ken russell fan and i haven't even seen lair of the white worm)

a radio play: children of the stones on bbc radio 4 (available on spotify hee hee)

and a couple of books: fairy tale (1996) by alice thomas ellis, and the owl service (1967) by alan garner. the owl service is for kids but it really did a number on me aged 12 and it still holds up as a classic. I think there's an old bbc series but i haven't got round to watching it yet :)