#also they are in this toxic circle of everything is amazing with the show when they know very well it's not

[allertonhoe]

haunted - rafe cameron (18+)

* * * I know if I'm hauntin' you, you must be hauntin' me * * *

note: wrote on here //years// ago but haven't in a while, pls be kind !! also kinda rushed to get it out asap since not october anymore lol so sorry if the editing isn’t amazing

content warnings: 18+ MDNI - smut, afab!reader, unprotected p in v, toxic relationship (on-and-off dynamic), mentions being under the influence of alcohol + drugs, desecration of a room in a strangers house smh, not actually halloween-themed but angsty af ❤️

length: 2.1k words

It was like a practiced routine at this point. A different Kook’s place getting sacrificed every weekend for another unsanctioned rager, the older adolescent crowd seizing any opportunity to get wasted. Plus there wasn’t much else to do on Figure 8, and it’s not like any of your parents really paid enough attention to stop you. More than likely boozed up themselves at the country club down the road.

You’d lost count of how many drinks you sculled back and joints you’d puffed pretty early on. The cocktail of substances that rushed through your system directing your conscious, your hips twisting along to the music without a care about who might be around. But you could tell there were a pair of eyes fixed on you, and you didn't need to look that way to know who was staring you down.

You couldn’t do anything, go anywhere, without your name being tied back to your ex-boyfriend, Rafe. Living in such a small, gossipy town, your long-standing (yet very contentious) affair was a hot topic. You knew it was all your mother ever talked about at the club with her girlfriends - she didn’t have much else to brag about anyway. Plus with not very far to go, there was no avoiding him forever.

One day, you'd been bickering and everything suddenly came to a head, storming out in the middle over a detail you couldn’t even recall anymore. He didn’t follow you out, didn’t text you later to apologize or check in on the status of your relationship. Both of you too proud to concede first, dragging out another melodramatic rift that didn’t need to happen. Your equally stubborn attitudes being your main obstacle instead of the original argument itself.

You ran in the same circles, that's how you'd gotten close in the first place. Your mutual friends urging you to just skip to the inevitable and reconcile, tired of hearing about your tumultuous dynamic. Catching brief glimpses of the brooding boy at every local function you showed up to, whether it was some annual club fundraiser that one of your parents were on the board of or another random house party. Always sensing his unwavering glare but never actually approaching to clear the air with you.

And from his unchanged demeanour, people would probably assume everything was fine. Rafe typically staying reclined against some wall, arms crossed over his chest, watching over you the entire night like some malignant curse. Shooting dirty looks at any guy that even glanced your way. Attempting to cope by chugging down more alcohol, trying to keep him off your mind and just have a good time with your friends, but you knew he wasn't just focused on your immediate surroundings.

At some point, you found yourself wandering through the hallways in search for a bathroom. Getting peace from the chaos as you found refuge in some random guest room. You scrambled into the attached ensuite, clumsily closing the door behind you as you assessed your surroundings as best as you could in your intoxicated state. Eventually composing yourself enough that you could return downstairs, but not expecting to be startled by a tall figure lurking as you returned to the bedroom.

“Fuck, Rafe. You scared the shit out of me." You announce, unsurprised as he grinned to himself at your unsuspecting alarm.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to."

“Did you follow me up here?” You question, getting your answer when he began to mimic a kid caught in a candy store.

"You, uh... You look really good." He compliments, shamelessly ogling you as he gradually approached.

You rolled your eyes, trying not let the sweet words affect you, especially knowing he was doing it to get a rise out of you. He knew it was better to get you alone, when the girlfriends you’d been venting to weren’t there to remind you about how distraught you’d been. Where he could trap you with his comforting musk - a blend of sea-salt, weed and expensive aftershave.

"Come on. Don't be that way, baby..." He pleads.

"I'm not being any way. And don't call me baby." You assert, trying your best to stand your ground. You knew how little it took for him to get under your skin, which took even less effort in your tipsy state.

"I miss you." He admits bluntly, his broad frame towering over you dauntlessly.

"I'm not doing this right now. I’m drunk, I’m sure you’re off your shit too." You protest, rubbing your scrunched-up face in distress.

"You don't have to do anything,” He reassures, his hands taking yours to uncover your features before dropping them to grip your hips. “And we don’t have to talk.”

That was your predicament - You were each other's weakness, unable to turn down the bold advances he would throw your way. Remembering of how much you adored how gentle he was when it was just the two of you, the opposite of his usual aggressive tone and shortness with everyone else. Falling victim to him again just from his commanding touch, trying your best to ignore the way he chastely kissed your exposed shoulder.

“We both know this isn’t a good idea.” You declare, but didn't outwardly reject him.

“Us a bad idea? Since when?” He surveys, sporting a cocky smirk as he realized it wouldn’t take too much convincing on his end.

His half-lidded eyes stayed on you as he waited for your response, gauging your reaction. His lips deliberately hovering over yours, dangling over you like bait. Unsure if it was because he didn’t want to overstep or was coaxing you to make the first move, trying to get you to give in first. He brought one of his hands up to your cheek, instinctively leaning into him as his thumb brushed over the skin.

“Rafe…” You remark softly, knowing he was already breaking down your walls again. “I can’t keep doing this with you. This back and forth. This break has been good for me...”

“So you’re done with me?” He retorts, emitting a scoff from you.

“I know you wouldn’t let me shake you off that easily Rafe.”

“Then why are you still picking a fight?” He raises his brow, his arrogance shining through.

“Because it’s more fun being a pain in your ass?”

“Yeah?” He grills playfully at your mouthy comment, too caught up in his teasing to notice he'd been subtly directing the two of you towards the bed.

“Seems to keep you coming back.” You reply, mirroring his steamy expression as he drew you closer.

He kissed you like it was all he’d been thinking about since you'd unceremoniously walked out all those weeks ago, like he needed to actually convince you to reconsider him. His movements in sync with yours as he helped you lay backwards, letting him take complete charge. Proceeding as if there had been no time lost, as if there was no unresolved tension between you. A disappointed whimper leaving you when he pulled away, which was quickly amended as he pecked down your neck hungrily.

“You always have me coming back, baby.” He mutters smoothly. “Doesn't matter how long it’s been…”

Holding his intense stare, you took the hem of your top and stripped off the fabric, silently affirming that he could keep going even though your body language had given him more than enough permission. He follows suit, removing his own shirt without hesitation as he returned his focus to you. Hooking his fingers into your skirt and ripping it off, only preoccupied with how good it felt being back here with you.

“You just walked out with no fucking explanation. Nothing. You really believe I’ve thought about anyone else?”

“Then show me how much you missed me” You request simply, Rafe wasting no time as he brought his lips back to yours.

He looked down at you like you were his hunted prey, only a thin ring of his striking cerulean irises visible around the edge of his blown out pupils, knowing at this point it wasn’t just the result of the coke he’d done earlier. Reaching behind your back and unclasping your bra, his vacant hand fondling one of your breasts, basically covering the surface with his large digits.

Dragging his lips up and down your torso, the only sounds filling the room being your ragged panting and the muffled noise coming from downstairs, neither of you paying any mind to the party still going on. Carefully making his way across your flesh, nipping at the skin as if to physically imprint you with his mark once again. Not that you'd even entertained another man’s company during your time apart.

His pace was agonizingly slow as he made his way to your panties, watching as he pecked down your stomach gingerly, tending to every area he stopped at. Your breath shuddering when he took the waistband between his teeth, not breaking his heated gaze as he tugged them down your legs. Fumbling to discard his own pants and boxers, hurrying to continue his initial task.

You gasp as his fingers purposefully skimmed against your core, your hands flying to his chest for some stability as you surrendered into his touch. Feeling his accelerated heart rate under your palms, the hasty rhythm matching your own just from the building anticipation. Giving him the same kind of attention, you confidently took him into your grasp, earning a similar, fervent response from Rafe.

Your shared desire unwavered as you angled him towards your entrance, the muted gesture doing more communication than you had for weeks. Instantly getting the fix that no drugs or alcohol had been able to satisfy. The hint of unrest that had been lingering since your last encounter vanishing at his invasion, trembling as he stretched you out and made himself comfortable inside you.

"Fuck," He grunts deeply, like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders, a wave of pleasure washing over him. "That’s it baby."

He only let you adjust to him for a few moments, too caught up in the fact he had you again to hold himself back any longer. Fucking you like he was making a statement with every thrust, knowing exactly what he needed to do to elicit the reaction he’d been craving from you, your walls enveloping him snugly with every jolt. His name falling from your lips like some sacred chant, sporting a cheeky grin as you fed his ego.

“Never letting you go like that again.” He proclaims, his words only pushing you further. “You’re damn frustrating, but fuck, you’re mine.”

His hand threaded through your hair, holding you firmly as he rested his forehead on yours, not letting up his fierce momentum. A familiar pressure started to build within you, Rafe never having to work too hard to bring you to bliss, slipping back into your accustomed dynamic. Knowing you wouldn’t last much longer, but recognizing the same went for him as his movements got sloppier. Absolute euphoria taking over as he relentlessly pounded into you.

“Say it. Tell me you’re mine.” He growls out, hearing the faint vulnerability laced underneath the demand.

“I’m yours…” You agree smoothly. “Always. Only you.”

This only drove him wilder, making him cling onto you even tighter, realizing he’d been just as lost without you as you’d been without him. Neither of you holding back the urgency that had built up, channeling whatever unspoken resentment that remained into your frenzied actions. Not too worried about how uncoordinated or desperate your efforts had become; just content that you were back together like you were supposed to be.

“R-Rafe, I-” You stammer, barely able to even get that out.

“I know, baby. I got you.”

A strangled moan escaped your throat as your orgasm hit, being fully consumed by him, his own release following seconds later. Leisurely making out as you reveled in your highs, cuddled like you were the last two people on Earth and not in some random bedroom hiding from a sea of your drunk peers. Not in any rush to get up right away, Rafe wrapped his arms around you protectively, holding you against his chest.

You’d kinda forgotten how much you loved being the object of his affection, how right it felt being held and kissed and taken care of by him. It was obvious as you both laid there that you wouldn't be neglecting your relationship again anytime soon, especially over some petty argument. Not missing the smug look on his face as you caught your breath, already back to finding the somewhat patronizing gesture more endearing than you probably would’ve an hour ago.

“What?”

“Do you even remember why you were so mad at me in the first place?”

[dooblebugss]

Some very general buggy headcanons for Bug Fables, focusing on the Main Three and the Explorers Association. Spoilers for the game.

Kabbu: (Rainbow Scarab Beetle)

- being a dung beetle (despite the name he's perfectly happy with mushrooms and leaves and everything else, he's actually quite diverse in his diet), he is very good at digging. He actually really likes digging too! Take a little dirt nap

- related to the previous, he loves being COMPRESSED. To mimic the feeling of layers of soil, he'll pile on blankets and pillows until he's satisfied. (During cuddle sessions he is at the very bottom of the pile)

- when it gets cold, his tunneling instinct increases ever so slightly. Not enough for him to start acting different, but he tends to hoard blankets.

Vi:

Leif (Technically a Fungus running on moth hardware, but sometimes old habits die hard lmao), Mothiva, and Yin:

- Bees don't need to 'dance' in order to communicate anymore, but Vi still uses a lot of hand gestures and moves a lot when talking, especially if she's frustrated or feels like she's not communicating well enough. If you bring attention to this, she will get mad.

- When cold, Vi will try to huddle up to bugs nearby. Typically Kabbu, but she's also done it to Maki, Zasp, Celia, and Stratos. (Leif is very jealous of this, but he's already cold, so-)

- they groom their ruffs, wings, and antennae frequently. For starters, this acts as a grounding experience that calms them down, and secondly no one likes having dirt on them. Yin isn't super good at it because she's so young, but she's getting better. Mothiva uses specialized powders and perfumes while doing it, but Leif does it the 'old fashioned way', aka with his spit, lol. Mothiva nearly fainted when she first saw him doing this.

- bright lights (especially artificial ones) can really mess up with their internal clock and GPS. I'd imagine Leif and Mothiva getting really really really lost in the Termite Kingdom and Bee Kingdom because of this.

Maki and Kina:

- they both have amazing reflexes, and they can go from a standstill to moving very quickly in what seems to be an instant

- they will track quick movement instinctually, especially from smaller bugs and critters. Most bugs assume this just shows how observant and skilled they are, when really it's a hunting trait. The two actually find it very embarrassing to suddenly interrupt a conversation when they see something move very quickly out of the corner of their eye and NEED to turn their head to see what it was.

Zasp: (I know the game says he's a potter wasp, but for my writing he's a paper wasp. He doesn't know this though, and assumes he is a potter wasp)

- when anxious, he will grind his mandibles against one another. It almost looks like he's chewing on nothing, and it would kinda be like chewing your lip or grinding your teeth. Chewing on things also helps.

- loves sleeping in little nest-like formations with blankets and pillows. He'd gather up all the bedding material, form a little "wall" with them, and climb in the middle to sleep.

Celia, Gen, and Eri:

- The three of them still use their antennae to help with direction, location, and general senses. This can lead to issues; Gen and Eri have accidentally followed each other for hours (cough cough ant spiral) and Celia, having a broken antennae, is terrible with directions. (If blindfolded, Celia will slowly go in circles)

- Ant Strength baby!!! The three of them are surprisingly strong, and can carry really heavy stuff! To compensate, they're a bit frail (it's why Celia has a shield, and why Gen and Eri rarely get into actual fights).

Levi:

- My man fucking loves Aphid Eggs. Due to the tension between the Ant Kingdom and Ladybugs, he actually doesn't like buying them in public. He usually settles for mushrooms.

- his blood is actually toxic, (something Delilah learned the hard way during a spar) and is sort of a 'last resort' defensive maneuver. If a target can get over being covered in blood, they definitely can't deal with the toxins.

Stratos: (I believe he's a Hercules Beetle)

- He's a technically nocturnal, so he's a little groggy during the day. To others it looks like he's being lazy, when really he's just tired and a little out of it. During the night is when he really shines as a fighter and explorer

- he can dig like Kabbu, but isn't very vocal nor enthusiastic about it. Stratos prefers a shallow little ditch to lay in, which is something he might do if he's really really tired.

Delilah:

- She only actually drinks blood during fights as an attack, or if she's seriously injured and needs a pick-me-up (Stratos will usually step up to the plate for that). She's totally fine with nectar and plant juices and berry juices otherwise. Delilah is aware of the stereotype, and she just kinda rolls her eyes at it.

- Delilah can actually fly like Vi or Zasp. But she prefers to keep this information to herself, as she's worried it'll have people ask her to do more work.

[cursedzucchini]

I'm so sorry for this, but i gotta get this cursed idea out of my head. (Also im following DC - disregard canon)

So basically when ra's was just some guy several hundred years ago, who wanted to he immortal for one reason or another. He was looking into the possibility of ghosts and found a ghost king summoning circle. His goal was to force the king to make him immortal, or at least tell him a way, but when he sees Danny, he decides to try another way.

He befriends Danny and kinda genuinely starts liking the guy. Stuff happens and they start dating (at this point ra's stopped being ass obsessed w immortality, but instead shifted his obsession to Danny). Ra's isn't as crazy at that moment and made sure Danny perceives him as his best self. Danny at his part, is just glad his new friend/bf doesn't want the secret to immortality.

Danny, after few years of relationhip, trusts ra's enough to tell him his true name (something which can be used against him) and shows him the infinite realms. Ra's is amazed and they're kinda vibing. Like it's not healthy relationship, ra's lying about so many things and Danny's kinda hoping their issues w way too different opinions work out.

It's not until ra's starts growing old, everything goes to shit. He starts seeing the signs of time on him, and that makes him once again obsess with immortality.

Now personal headcanon of mine is that loving fiercely and obsessively is something all Al ghuls have in common.

So ra's doesn't just leave Danny to go and get his immortality (at this point i feel like he figured several ways, but didn't want to destroy his relationship w Danny), no. My dude decides "hey, my partner is the ghost king, meaning if i become his official lover, I'd get some of that sweet sweet immortality juice myself. And i wanted to marry him anyway, so"

So yes. Ra's uses the true name to marry Danny without his consent and tie his being to him.

And when Danny feels this, hes mad. Bc not only did someone he actually loved betrayed his trust with the true name thing, in the confrontation about all of this, it turns out most of their relationship was a lie!

The argument that follow all of this is huge. Ra's doesn't understand what he did wrong, and Danny's pissed off (maybe he was preparing something for ra's so they could stay together to make it more painful). It ends w Danny storming out of whatever place they lived in.

Ra's angry and feels betrayed too. They finally managed to make their relationship official and Danny's angry???' he destroys the place, and everything that could remind him of Danny.

So when some tired ghost comes in, asking him to sign the divorce papers? No he's not gonna do that.

The ghost was ready for that and told him he could take anything in exchange (Danny was heartbroken and pissed off at that moment, he wasn't really thinking). Ra's was playing with the thought of saying Danny's core, but... that would be for nothing. He wanted to be immortal after all.

So he says that cool ecto pool Danny showed him few years back. And ghost, who was really fucking tired and wanted to quickly get back home, was like "aight"

Thus ra's al ghul got his lil toxic pools.

Six hundred years forward, and suddenly the justice league has an Eldritch god on their hands ranting about their "stupid fucking ex, taking the nice pools in the divorce"

---

My personal hc for this prompt is that Danny found out Abt ra's having the pits, by someone mentioning how unfair it is that red hood gets another chance at life.

Also idk but the idea of ra's heading Abt this, taking out the newest iphone and calling batman like "hey I'm gonna have to warn u, a crazy guy might appear and say some bs Abt me stealing his pools, tHATS NOT TRUE IT WAS A FAIR GAME AND IF HE DIDNT WANT ME TO TAKE THEN, HE SHOULDNT HAVE DICORCED ME D:<"

Idk man just batfam/jl in the middle of them fighting Abt this.

(Damian & Talia would def grow up hearing stories about him and would kinda look up to him, bc ras only told them the cool stuff he did, not the time he stubbed his toe and accidentally created something like a mountain idk)

This is so dumb aight I'm out, I'm so sorry-

situation is - Oh bollocks, it’s my ex. But instead of Constantine and King Shark, it’s Danny and Ra’s Al Ghul

[the-dream-beyond]

Episode 16 - Ayurveda and Balanced Living: Nurturing the Mind, Body, and Spirit with Divya Alter

Divya alter 

There's certain vibrations that also lead to the mind. So somebody who has very active mind a lot of anxiety, panic attacks, it definitely shows in the pulse. But the other thing that vitamins should taught us with pulse reading is also level of toxicity. Well, in a general sense, you know, what, for example, if somebody has accumulated a lot of hot, acidic toxins, it's very easy to feel that in the pulse.

Nik Tarascio 

I'm sure you've heard you are what you eat. And today we're going to be talking to someone who is helping people really understand that relationship to food and to self into that interconnection. She's a master in a modality of health that is considered to be the oldest on record. And if you've never heard of Ayurveda, you're going to be learning a bunch about it today. Hope you really enjoy.

Welcome to the dream beyond. I'm your host, Nik Tarascio. I'm a co musician and overall seeker of Truth, inspiration and simply put, how to live the most fulfilling life possible. Growing up surrounded by extremely wealthy and successful people gave me unique and unfiltered perspectives of those who have seemingly made it through on the dream beyond, we're letting you in on what it really takes to achieve your dreams. What happens when it turns out your destination isn't the promised land you are expecting and how to process the lessons from your past while mapping of course to true fulfillment. Let's get started.

Hey, everybody, excited to be with you. Today. We have an amazing guest who is a Certified Nutritional Consultant, educator, author of two cookbooks, and a chef with over 30 years of experience in the shock of Ayurveda tradition. She's also the founder of Divya's kitchen, a plant based restaurant in New York City. One of my favorites to be honest, I go there for the the lasagna is to die for. She's also the creator of Divya as a line of good for you packaged foods. And because she doesn't do enough, she's also the co founder of Bhagavat life, a nonprofit culinary school that offers cooking classes in North America's first Ayurvedic chef certification program, making her a leading authority on our Vedic cooking and nutrition. So please welcome Divya altar. Thank you for being here with us today, Divya.

Divya alter 

Thank you. Thank you, Nick for having me. I don't know if I'm a leading authority on anything. But I'm definitely enjoy doing everything we do right now. And I'm definitely my foot. My whole world revolves around food, especially food that's used for healing. So it's so nice to be with you. Thank you for having me.

Nik Tarascio 

Yeah. And even if you're not a leading authority for the whole world, you are for me, because again, I really enjoy your restaurant. I've taken many of my family members there. My fiance and I have done your masterclasses. And again, we just wait, we even have the seasonal food box here that we're trying to do like kind of the whole Ayurvedic cleanse. So, again, I appreciate what you do. And I would love to kind of dive in with probably a little bit of a nonstandard question, but when you were a child, what did you dream you'd be when you grew up.

Divya alter 

I dream to be a doctor. But the doctor in the sense that helping people improve their health. And then even as a child, like with my friends, we would play doctors, you know, we use like, fake IVs and do things like that. And I really enjoyed them. Yes, so now and I and that and now I see that I'm very interested in healing. That's my passion, especially healing with food. And, and also, all of this stems through my own healing, right? Like, my own struggles with health, not just physically but also mentally, really going deeper into connecting with who I am and what I'm meant to do in the world. So, so yes, I'm very, somehow never became a doctor. But I am in the healing circle for sure.

Nik Tarascio 

So I would love to hear about for people that don't know what Ayurveda is, because I imagine it's a word that like I brought it up thinking everyone would know what I was talking about. And most people go I have no idea what any of that is. So for people that have no concept of what it is, what is it? What are the core principles of it?

Divya alter 

Ayurveda is the traditional medical science of India. So it's one of the oldest healing systems recorded in the world. Actually, if in some people say it's the oldest, it's actually older than Chinese medicine. So before 150 years ago, or even few 100 years ago, when there were no pharmaceuticals, you know, there were we didn't use medicine the way we know it today. How did people heal? What did the doctors use? So they use all these traditional methods, also using local herbs and local even food ingredients? that would support a particular illness or imbalance. And Ayurveda has been recorded. People say I mean exactly how old it is. That's debatable.

Some people say it's 5000 years old. It's kind of easy to say that but many historians that's much older than that. It's very old. And what I love about Ayurveda, it has many goals. But Ayurveda doesn't just treat the patient, it doesn't treat the disease, it treats the whole person, physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, so are you ready really helps us integrate our health on every level, because our mental health affects our physical health. spiritual health can affect our mental health, they're all related. And what I love about Ayurveda is that it's a very personalized science. There are, there's a discussion on different body types. So depending on what your body type is, then and what your imbalance is what's going on in your body, then there will be specific personal protocols for food or exercise or cleansing, or anything, Mac lifestyle, all that. So I love it, because it's a very personalized approach to health rather than just one treatment. Oh, you have a headache, take a pill, you know, it's not like that. It's like, where's the headache coming from? Let's find the cause first, and then we'll address the symptoms and the treatment protocols.

Nik Tarascio 

So it looks like of all the different sides of Ayurveda because again, I appreciate the way you describe it as it is a complete look at a person from every angle, it's the physical, the emotional, the mental, all those things. It looks like you really found a connection towards Ayurveda as it relates to food and the way you bring it to the world. And I'm just wondering how that intersected with your life path. Exactly.

Divya alter 

So I, okay, so I came into food I started, I realized that I love to cook when I was 18 years old. And I was I was frustrated with life at that age. I was like, this life doesn't make sense. There must be a deeper meaning to life. So the communist, I'm from Bulgaria, so the communism was just breaking down in 1990. And I got I really became very curious about yoga. And I was like I, I really connected with the, the way the yogic texts explain the meaning of life, the soul, we're not the body and all that. And I'm like, Oh, this makes total sense to me. So I started looking for a yoga studio. And there were there weren't any those days, it was forbidden, because everything spiritual was forbidden back then. And then I met a person who was running an underground yoga ashram in my hometown. And I absolutely loved everything. And I became an intern because I was also trying to be a vegetarian, and I didn't know how to be a healthy vegetarian, and how to make it tasty also. So I became an intern, and I started learning how to cook just helping in the kitchen. And then in exchange, I was learning yoga. And I really fell in love with food. So years later, I went to India, to connect with the roots of yoga and to continue with my education as well. And then I started feeling very sick.

So I went through a period of time and I was really, my digestion was almost zero. And that's how I started the local doctor was an Ayurveda doctor and really amazing one. And, and he didn't, and I thought, oh, yeah, he would just give me some herbs. I think I thought that I have as a treatment is like allopathic treatment, but with herbs instead of medication. So so it's like, oh, you have digestive problems. Take this herb, you have a headache, they take this herb, but no, it's not like that. So it's like, he was like, Okay, it's not just the herbs, you have to change your diet has to change how you when you sleep, how you sleep, how you exercise, to align with your body type with with your constitution, so that you can experience your best health.

So he gave me a list of foods. And then I started learning how to cook like this with food combinations with spices that really support digestion, and it's not just tasty, but it's actually digestible as well. And I was like, wow, this is amazing. I started feeling like I've never felt like that before. Wow. So and then later on, when I came to the United States, I became very sick this time it was serious I had an autoimmune disease, a lot of inflammation, a lot of digestive issues. And when I met my main I remember the teacher His name is Vida Mishra, then I, this is when I really started studying in depth. And it changed my life just changing my diet and applying the Ayurvedic principles to a vegetarian healthy diet, I was already in eating healthy, but I read it takes healthy to 2.0 to a different level.

And I was I don't have autoimmune anymore as healthy and I have more energy now and I'm 51 years old, then 10 or 15 years ago, it's amazing how the body can reset itself and come back to where it's supposed to be. So I'm very grateful. And I started teaching cooking classes. And, and people who just would do simple recipes or follow just a few simple principles they learned from me, and they will be like, Wow, I feel so much better. And not only physically but my mind is more peaceful. And I'm like, yeah, it's working. So, so then I decided with my husband as apprentice, we were like, Let's just make this our life mission. Let's help people connect, truly connect with the healing benefits and experience the healing benefits of food by cooking it learning how to prepare it by coming to a restaurant by providing products so they can easily prepare something at home. So yeah, so I've been doing this for the past many years here in New York City.

Nik Tarascio 

That's incredible. And I think what's what I find interesting about what you're doing, and the restaurant specifically is that I imagine that you're the first interface for a lot of people into either Vedic principles or AI or Vedic food. And so I am wondering as someone and again, I saw it in the masterclass which I've tried to study Ayurveda. I've tried to make sense of it. And even watching your masterclass and like the first, I think it was the first segment, I was amazed by stuff I'd never heard before. I was like, even that I've not found that stuff online. I've not found these principles explained in a way that was simple. But what are some of the common misconceptions or resistance that you find when you start to tell people about this? And it's the first time they're hearing about it? What do people push back on?

Divya alter 

Oh, that's a really good question that, you know, I meet so many people, one of the first thing may be that it may sound very complicated at first, because it's so much, okay, so I have to think about my doshas about my body type, about the season, about my digestion, about the properties of the ingredients, it's so much to think about. But, and also because we're not trained, our mind is not trained to think that way. We just think, Oh, I'm hungry, I'm going to eat. It's not we're not trying to connect, the food we eat with the way we feel. And the foods we eat completely affects the way we feel, by the way.

But we're not just we, our perspective on food is different. So, and I felt overwhelmed as well, when I first started studying, but it's actually very simple and it makes a lot the principles of Ayurveda make a lot of sense, because they align us with nature. So there's one of the main goals of Ayurveda is to help us flow with nature. And we are part of nature, we get sick when we separate ourselves from nature. It's either our own nature, or the nature around us when you kind of cut that connection.

But but because I read it's not like rules that the other misconception is like, there are too many rules. And I'm like, you guys, it's not rules. These are just, this is just how nature works. It just telling you, okay, so have you, for example, have your main meal, the biggest quantity of food, especially if you have digestive issues, have it for lunch, when the sun is at the highest point in the sky, around lunchtime, then you digestive fire digestion is strongest at that time. So Have more food and heavier food then don't eat too heavy foods at night, or early in the morning when your digestion is either going to sleep or waking up. So and I'm like yeah, this makes total sense. Right.

So work how to align ourselves with the circadian rhythms. And then and then and then when you start flowing with nature and not go against the current of nature, all of a sudden you feel so much more balanced. And, and that's the goal. That's what good health is that you feel balanced mentally, spiritually, emotionally, physically. So, yeah, just and I always tell people just take it one thing at a time, you don't have to study the whole Ayurveda into the AC, just try something, try some, try waking up earlier and see how you feel, try going to bed earlier, see how you feel. And then all of a sudden you have more energy, your skin is clearer, your your mind is more peaceful, your digestion is working better. And this is, again, you're aligning with nature, you're allowing the body to heal itself and work the way it's supposed to work. So that's, that's some points on that.

Nik Tarascio 

Yeah, I mean, as you say that it's like so obvious when it's like, yeah, of course, when I'm waking up, my digestive fire might not be as strong. And of course, when I'm tired, it might not be that strong. When you said it, I was like waiting to be like, Wait, does the sun's alignment have something to do with the fire? But then it's like, No, that just, it's obvious that the body is using energy to come to life and using energy go to sleep or given up his energy. So when you say that, I'm like, yeah, that like that seems practical. But I imagine that the fact that it's an ancient system, and the fact that it does require some understanding of principles is like, so again, my listening audience is a lot of high achievers that are going a million miles an hour, and it's like, just tell me the answer. I just want to know the answer to what I'm supposed to do. We're looking for prescription, not so much like learning a whole new modality. But I really was, you know, I've dealt with a lot of autoimmune issues myself, I've had a lot of a lot of digestive issues. And when I was younger, we tried everything.

We tried everything we could imagine it was like infusions, and this and that and these medications. And it was funny to find out that the thing that made the biggest difference was just changing my diet that no one told me, No doctor ever told me, Hey, why don't you just try eating different foods and see what upsets your stomach and doesn't, it was like so ridiculously obvious. So I appreciate that aspect of it does seem overwhelming, I Aveda just seems like such a wealth of knowledge. Again, you can set it 1000s and 1000s of years old. But you know, kind of continuing down that road is what or if someone came to you, and you were like, again, I want to win them over with Ayurveda, I'm gonna give them just a couple of small principles, a couple of small practices, just to dip their toe. So they're going to get a result. And once they get that result, I know that they're going to be invested in wanting to know more other other kind of simple tips or simple concepts that you generally will share with people to get them excited about it and see some basic result.

Divya alter 

Yeah, definitely. I mean, I will share a couple of things first, but I think also it's, it's not just doing it's also adjusting our perspective on who we are in our life. Because our event is not about fixing a problem. Are you ready is about complete healing. And through the, through the process of healing, are you aware that helps us to clear personal obstacles, like it could be a bad habit of just being angry all the time, or it could be a resentment that we've been holding, or a person that we didn't forgive, or an emotional trauma that we're still holding from our early childhood or whatever it is. So again, I evade the helps heal the whole person. So when somebody comes to me and says, I just need a quick fix, I would say, Well, I can offer, I can offer advice on what can help you relieve the symptom if you just come to that. But you can go so much deeper, and you can experience a beautiful, exciting, liberating transformation. And even your perception of suffering will change when you go once you go through this.

And it doesn't mean that you really have to suffer and take cold showers and perform all these austerities to achieve you know, enlightenment or something. But, but it means that you participate in your own healing. So when somebody comes to me for help, and I offer nutritional consultations when I have time, that's not I'm busy with other things. But sometimes people ask me for help and somebody comes to me I don't really treat them I which I wouldn't do anyway. But I help them first of all align with themselves who they are and then understand what what they need to do to help the body heal itself. So I see myself as support supporting their own healing instead of just fixing problems. You know what I mean? Yeah, so so it's like, yeah, you can you can just like brushed through life. And by when you go very quickly through through life, and you don't take the time to digest your experiences and to reflect and to gain the wisdom from what you just went through, we need to have those times when you go through life so quickly, in your old age, when you kind of decide, okay, you retire, and you look back, and you may feel unfulfilled, because, because if you don't do your inner work, you may feel frustrated and unfulfilled.

So, I always tell people, you know, you can still be a high achiever, but find moments during the day, or during the week where you can slow down and, and develop those habits of connecting. How are you feeling? What what do you meant? Who are you really, what do you meant to do in this life? What what just happened? Yeah, correctly, how could you have done it better, like really take time to reflect, and this will, this will help you digest, not just physically, that just food, but also digest life, and gain the wisdom that you can then transmit you, children or those people that you lead. But in terms of simple self care? Let's see. Well, one very simple thing that you can do first thing in the morning, if you're not doing it yet, is scrape your tongue. So you can get a Thai tongue scraper, it's a simple metal thing can be stainless steel, I use a silver one, I like the silver one better. I don't recommend the copper one. Because if you saliva is very acidic, the copper will oxidize from the acidity of the saliva.

So stainless steel is silver. And after you brush your teeth, you can just scrape your tongue, you know, it's very easy. There are a lot of videos on YouTube about to do that it takes few seconds. But this will this will refresh your breath, it also diminishes bad bacteria in the mouth diminishes acidity, it helps you to stay better. And yeah, it's just a cleanse a daily cleansing procedure, something very simple you can do. Another simple thing you can do is, let's say, let's see, with food. So don't eat fresh fruits with anything else. So eat them alone.

And sometimes people eat them as dessert, simply because they digest differently. I have a friend and she, she would sit down. And sometimes we go to events or something. And there is a buffet with so many foods and you don't want to take a little bit of everything. And there's usually fruit also like a fresh fruit. And so you take little fruit and then take oatmeal or pancake or whatever else. And you eat all this together the same time. Fresh fruit digest differently than cooked food. And when you eat them together, it can cause a lot of bloating and gas. And I told her why don't you just eat the fruit, either as a snack between meals or maybe eat it 30 Min 30 minutes before your meal, start with that and then wait a little bit and then eat the rest. And she did and she's like, Oh my God, my Bloating is gone. I thought this was a chronic illness with so just it's called Food compatibility in Ayurveda, like kind of like a food combining so. So I teach this in the master classes and I write I give you the charts in my books what to combine. What's good combination was bad combination, because just by avoiding the bad combinations, you have so much digestion will be so much better.

Nik Tarascio 

Amazing. Yeah, I think I'm guilty of what your friend is guilty of when I go to buffets. I try to win at the buffet, I want to try everything. So I imagine that's also put a bit of a toll on my body. But you also said something else in there that I'm really curious about, especially because I come from Italian heritage very passionate, very charged. And I'm wondering about you were talking about anger as it relates to Ayurveda are there foods that can reduce anger? And is it possible that Italian foods are the opposite of that?

Divya alter 

Yes. So you come from a very temperamental culture, right. So yes, so their food definitely affects affects us mine mentally which can translate in our relationships also. So there are foods that are very stimulating. They usually pungent foods like spicy. It's not just I mean, you go to other cultures that you eat a lot of spicy foods, and sometimes they're just talking and they look like they're quarreling. I just haven't. Right, but it's just the nature, so usually very pungent spicy foods can lead to having more temperament. The other one is onions and garlic. So these two very pungent, right, and they're very stimulating, I always recommend either use less of them insert in summer, you should definitely use less of them because otherwise you sweat too much.

And you sweat will stink too. So, but I mean, it's the connection, right? Connecting what you eat the words coming out of the body, so but also, like don't eat a lot of those very stimuli. It could be also like kimchi, or something that's really sour, really salty, really spicy. If you eat that at night, it's so stimulating, it may affect your sleep, you may not be able to fall asleep. So eat it for lunch. Yeah, so. So these are some stimulating foods, especially in Italian cooking, I would say the garlic and maybe some onions, especially if it's a raw and cooked. So that's when they're strongest. So they're very medicinal. But again, we have different body types. If you have a very fiery body type, the kind of person who is always feels hot and you walk in tea in a T shirt in the middle of the winter and you don't feel hot and so and you sweat a lot.

So that's a fiery body type. Then then you need less of those spicy foods because they will they're very heating they will increase your heat you'll sweat more your skin will be red. Alcohol does the same thing. It's very fiery substance. So what was cool it down. I think Basil is Nik basil in Italian cuisine is a saver because especially the fresh sweet basil, it has a cooling effect. It also helps you digest the heavy cheeses and pass the and all that. But zucchini zucchini is a great cooling vegetable. very calming so zucchini produces calmness in the body. artichokes, asparagus, you know these are all coming vegetables, fruits like fresh, juicy fruits. What you like artichokes?

Nik Tarascio 

I do? Yeah. I love artichokes I used to my family would do that like the fried artichoke with all the breading on it, which is probably less artichoke and more bread. But that was delicious. And I do like artichoke hearts.

Divya alter 

Yeah, yeah, they're great. They're really good for your liver. So they're very calming for the liver. So a lot of that angry energy can also come when your liver is too challenged like either too sluggish or in Ayurveda. We speak about how to liver when the liver has way too much toxicity accumulated or, you know, whatever it may be the liver is kind of challenged. So yeah, so artichokes are amazing for the liver. Incredible. They very Pelion.

Nik Tarascio 

I don't know if you know the answer to this, or I don't know if this is known in all of Ayurvedic practice, but I just started going to an ayurvedic doctor. And the first time I met her, she took my wrist, and in about 30 seconds told me what my constitution was, anyway, how does that work? Like I've had tons of doctors that have done tons of tests on me. And this woman grabbed my wrist and 30 seconds basically told me my entire medical history. How's that even possible?

Divya alter 

Yeah, so that's part of the science right? Pulse reading is fascinating. Ayurvedic I'm trained in this as well. So the are you ready pulse rating is different than a modern Doctor reading their, you know, your pulse rate or something like that. So there are three, we use three fingers for reading the pulse. So the fourth finger, the middle finger, and the ring finger, and you put your fourth finger by the wrist joint. So this is I don't know if I can show but this like this. So this is vata, this is the Air and Space elements in your body, the middle finger is better, that's the fire element in your body, and the ring finger is Kapha the water and earth element. So depending on So, in Ayurveda, we describe like the strength of the pulse, how strong it is, this this determines if, like, if you have weak strength, it to me to say that you probably have chronic fatigue, for example, like you don't have a robust energy you have less energy.

So and then depending on how you pulse there's also a particular way of pressing and the depth into in which you press and it will tell me which dosha dosh the doshas are the and bio energies that govern all the functions in the body. So vata governs circulation governs the heart, it governs the Colin, it governs overall movement and overall health. It got there's about three in the stomach. So if I feel that specific sensations you have to learn these sensations in, in, in my in this thing my bath the finger, then it tells me that I connect that to a function in that particular part of your body. And then I ask you, are you constipated? And they're like, how could you tell? You know, or, or with the pitha? Like, sometimes they check the pulse, and it's like, Oh, my God, do you have acid reflux?

And they're like, oh, yeah, it's really bad. So. And then with the kapha, I could also like, for example, he could tell me that you have water retention, without even looking at you. If even if I close my eyes without looking at you. I can feel inside. Oh, wow, do you have water retention? So that's the water element, right, then it's vibrating particularly. And then also every though she's connected to different organs. So maybe she asked you about certain organs that you might have history with. So yeah, it takes a long time to learn this. And it's actually it's a lifetime process. It's like you always learn something from it.

Nik Tarascio 

Well, you just ruined my dream, because I was like, I just want to learn this over the weekend. But it sounds like it sounds like it's quite a bit of work to be able to do this just seems like an amazing skill to be able to take someone and immediately get a sense of what their inner system is.

Divya alter 

Yes, yeah, it's very helpful. And it also so you can also there are certain vibrations that also lead to the mind. So somebody who has very active mind, a lot of anxiety, panic attacks, it definitely shows in the pulse. But the other thing that vitamins should taught us with pulse reading is also level of toxicity. Well, in a general sense, you know, but for example, if somebody has accumulated a lot of hot acidic toxins, it's very easy to feel that in the pulse. So when I feel this for somebody, I would always just the diet because don't have those hot hot foods, they will only make you more fat, right? So the policy is very helpful for me to help people guide them through exactly what they need to eat right now, what they need to avoid in order to bring themselves back to balance.

And it's also fun to like that, like there is a way if somebody can also show if your channels like like digestive tract and other channels in the body is are more clogged, you know, like your pipes are clogged, you know, in a sense. And by the Misha tell us how to he called it tofu pals. So tofu is a very hard to digest food. And it can cause a lot of blockages in the body, especially if your digestion is not strong. So I it's like it that particular sensation, whenever I feel it, and I asked the person, do you eat a lot of tuffeau? And they're like, there's no way you know that I eat a lot of stuff. There's no way you could know that. And I like it. The balls never, never, never realize.

Nik Tarascio 

So is it the kind of thing where if someone did want to go down the road of saying I would love to have an Ayurvedic practitioner helped me make sense of what a protocol would even look like? Or what what my path might look like? Do you generally recommend that people do meet someone in person so they can do the pulse reading on their body instead of doing a zoom call or something like that?

Divya alter 

Is that is definitely helpful. But the pulse reading is only one way of assessing your condition right? Looking at you so there's ways to look just at your whole body, your face. Some people just read the face. There is also a way to like use real wrinkles. And they can tell Oh, you have liver and kidney problem you have there is also a town so assessing your tongue can be another way of asking questions. So another way so if you wanted to do it on Zoom, it's usually the doctor or practitioner will ask you many questions. Very specific questions, and they can be very personal questions. So how is your poop? What does it look like? Does it smell you? How often do you have it? You know, like, it may seem like rude, this is gross, but it's actually very important symptom of good or bad health. So So yeah, usually if you do it virtually and many really good doctors do it virtually. I mean during the pandemic, you know, we had no choice. Yeah, but, but even a good doctor can help you virtually. But seeing being in person is definitely, you had get a lot more bonuses with that as well.

Nik Tarascio  

So kind of zooming out from all of this stuff if you took the entire practice of Ayurveda, and apply it to the question of, you know, how does Ayurveda relate to living a more fulfilling life, because that's really at the heart of what this show is about. It's, we're all trying a million different things to try to bring joy or have these moments of happiness or try to get, you know, win at life, whatever that means. What does Ayurveda tell us about what fulfillment really is or how to achieve it?

Divya alter 

It's all about connection. So, you know, in the beginning, we spoke about how help diminishes when we disconnect ourselves, from who we are and from nature around this. So are you ready helps us to really understand our our, first of all, how a body works your individual body, how it works, what are the strengths, what are the weaknesses, and how to balance that, and knowing what your stress points are. And when you're in a stressful situation, offering suggestions of how you can minimize the reactions to stress. But and then and then on a deeper level, seeing yourself as more the body more than the body because the body we know we grow, we grow up we grow old, this illness is part of life, we nobody has perfect health. But I already can minimize can help us maintain it's a preventative health is big part of Ayurveda. So by practicing Ayurvedic diet, lifestyle, we kind of avoid a lot of the lifestyle related illnesses, lifestyle and diet related illnesses that are so common today.

Nik Tarascio 

So example of that.

Divya alter 

With diabetes, you know, it's such a big one, or even heart disease, high blood pressure, you know, these are, all of these can be reversed and prevented with you have lifestyle and diet that are more aligned with your own body constitution and also with nature. So not going against nature's laws and really acting as we're part of nature, and not some implant. So, so finding that connection for yourself, when you feel centered and connected with who you are, what your life's purpose is, I think this is such a strong foundation for fulfillment, and happiness.

And the other thing that I, for me, it's so important is that you don't do this just for yourself, you're not you're not trying to be healthy, just for the sake of being healthy. Right? You do this so that you can be of service to others. And happiness really comes I mean, you can just make a comfortable life for yourself. But real happiness comes when you're able to serve others and help others and have beautiful relationships with with others. So that's, that's a big part of health as well. So again, it's again, connection, right? Connecting with other living entities, not just not just on mental satisfaction, but really hard to heart. Like really feeling that heart to heart connection with everybody around you. It's very powerful.

Nik Tarascio 

Yeah, I mean, I'm, I'm on that path right now, I think I've been chasing, you know, the show is obviously for a particular reason that it's most of my life has been chasing the external successes. And now coming to the space of, I recognize that that game never ends, like that can just go on for all of time. So what does it mean to go within my spells, you know, within myself, especially knowing that I live in my head, not as much in my body. So really trying to reconnect to the body and trying to get some of that wisdom of what does my body crave? What does it need? And instead of having everyone outside of me telling me what the answers to the questions are, can I create that connection to self, that my body's like, well, I want to eat that and I don't want to eat that. And this doesn't work for me, and this is what does. So I very much appreciate that. And you know, beyond the masterclass which I hope with my crazy work schedule to get through the whole thing soon because I just find it so interesting. And I just learned about your, you know, again, your cooking school, which is also really interesting that, you know, that might be a path for me to go down as well. For someone who really feels like this is such an interesting area. What are some additional ways people can get involved in understanding what this is and learning it beyond? Like I said, the masterclass in the cooking class and things like that.

Divya alter 

Well, I mean, There are many workshops and you don't have to become an ayurvedic doctor or practitioner to learn how to take care of yourself, most people, I mean, if it's your calling to be a healer, and to help people with their health and and guide them that way, then yes, but a big part of it is just taking self care. And these are all preventative medicine, little things that you can do. And again, it's like, you try something, oh, it works for me great. We also have to make adjustments with the seasons.

So scraping a time is something you can do daily to the rest of your life. But I don't know. Maybe you cannot bathe in the ocean all the time, we cannot walk barefoot all the time, you know, which is can be very grounding practice. But so there are little practices that you just have to see oh, yeah, this works for me right now, I find it very helpful, like, apply simple things. Are you very good recommendations, especially when you travel a lot. Like, you have a jet company, Nik. The airplane, traveling by airplane creates so much havoc in our body, and some people are more used to it than others.

But still, it's like, it's very unnatural condition for our body to be in when we are in the airplane. So. So for example, when before you fly, there are certain things you can do. Like even if you go for a massage with a nice oil, or you do sell oil massage, or just put a little bit of oil on your feet before you put on your socks, this will this will really make it will it will add more groundedness when you're up in the air, I like to put a little oil in my nostrils because it gets so dry on the airplane, little things and as soon as you land, try to walk barefoot summery, could be the beach or grass or something like that to land your body also, fully.

So they and there's so many little practices like that, that. And it's not you don't even have to memorize them, you just follow the main principle of balance that you're always balanced with the opposite energy of what you're experiencing right now. So when you're very cold, you need warm foods, you need warm drinks, right to bring more warmth as you you need warm clothes. When you're very hot, you need something cooling, when you're running in very high speed, like in an aeroplane, when you're traveling, then you need when as soon as you arrive, slow down. You know I love little bit of time to your body to slow down and adjust. Don't just start rushing and running and going to conference just plan a day to just rest first. And then and then it's like we will not overusing our body because a lot of health problems also come. And that's one of the causes that I evangelists is disease is overusing our senses. We just abused our bodies too much. You know, we use the it's like, like you run your car without taking care of it. And then one day it just breaks. So yeah, so I always tell people just slow down.

Nik Tarascio 

Yeah, no, I mean, that's, that's hard. For me running a jet company is very much. It is about going a million miles an hour. And I appreciate that, you know, finding those moments of grounding, finding those moments of just pausing taking a breath slowing it down, I think you know, I just think of landing at JFK. It is a circus, right? It's like rush to the car, get in the car, rush home, get home rush to do the next thing. So I can see that. You know, again, I when I was first introduced to pyruvate, I just knew it as food. So it is interesting to hear kind of how these practices really as an entire way to live your life an entire way to find connection to self. So I appreciate that very much. And I have to ask kind of our our big final question as you've done so much. And again, I just reading your bio, it's like the amount of things you've achieved. It's really impressive. And you've, you've helped, I'm assuming a lot of people through this work. I know again, you've helped me personally. When you dream, what do you dream about now?

Divya alter 

Oh, well, I always my prayer and my dream is to always be of service of loving service to people. I don't I don't have like for me, you know, I'm a poor poor girl from Bulgaria. I didn't even speak English but like, like, what, 30 years ago, but and then I wrote books and English books in English and it's like, wow. But like for me the main the main lesson in my life is that when my mindset is that I'm here to serve people. And yeah, for me to grow personally, that's my personal task.

But I'm, I'm here to be of service to people. I don't live my life just for myself. I live to help others as well. And, and then whatever my service is, whatever service presents itself at the time, like, if you asked me 20 years ago that I will have restaurant, I will be like, Are you crazy, I never really, that wasn't my dream. So I know, some people are meant to do very specific tasks, and they dream about it, and I achieve it. And that's beautiful for me, is more like, I'm here to serve. And I will do wherever I'm at you I'm taking us to do I'll take the opportunity for service, because it makes me really happy. So it, if I, if there are moments, of course, I go into just thinking about myself, and I'm the center of the universe. And it's like, I get so depressed.

And I'm like, No, I'm just a tiny speck in this creation. I'm part of this universal machine. And, and by through service, I spirit, I experienced connection with everybody and everything around me. And that makes me very happy and fulfilled. So and grateful.

Nik Tarascio 

Yeah, that's beautiful. And I have to ask, because, I mean, were you always this humble.

Divya alter 

Um, no. That's, that's still work in progress. But, you know, the school of hard knocks, I've been through, I've been through very humbling experiences in my life. And, and I, I definitely am not very humble at all. But, but it's, I find humility to be a beautiful thing. It's, it has nothing to do with low self esteem. If I had low self esteem, I wouldn't be talking to you, right?

But, but humility is, again, connecting with who you are, and knowing that you're more than this body that you're to me, I'm eternal soul. I'm a beautiful divine spiritual being. And that goes through different cycles of life. And like that, then there are lessons to be learned and service to be done. But but without, without humility, we cannot we can never experience through gratitude. And without gratitude, we can never experience fulfillment, we will always be dissatisfied with something.

So, to me, humility and gratitude go hand in hand, and this leads to lasting satisfaction in life. And you may, it may seem that you haven't achieved anything externally. But still, you're completely satisfied and happy. And when you go to India, you see a lot of sourdoughs, a lot of saintly persons that are so accomplished spiritually. They don't have big companies or anything like that. And they completely free from false identification, you know, big ego. They don't have they don't aspire for material things, but they're just so happy and satisfied. And it's like, how come? Where is this coming from?

Nik Tarascio 

Yeah, I struggle with that, too. I'm like, What have you done lately? Right? Like, how do you have such self satisfaction when your life is so simple? And again, I'm sure that's more of my conditioning of I've measured my own success by being goal oriented. You know, it's like, it's not about who I am. It's about what I've done. And I tried to transition more to that. And I'm curious to like, dive a little bit deeper into that question. You just said, your self esteem you you have self esteem. And that humility is not the same as self esteem. How do you separate those two in your head?

Divya alter 

Well, who is the self right? What do I identify myself with? So if I identify myself, with just the body and the mind, then it's like, I'm always thinking are, how am I looking? What if they think about my eyes or my glasses, I just focus on body types and I lose my confidence, you know, like, like body parts and it's like, so that a lot of people get stuck in that. They, they think that the way they look, I mean, Appearance is important, but it's not. It's not. It's just one piece of who we are. So I'm also again, when I when I think of myself, as a servant of others. It's not like serving like a slave but I'm here to be a service to you.

Then And then my ego is like, you know, I'm here to serve. And I'm very happy to do that. Rather than and we're all servants. I mean, even if you're leader of a big company, you're serving your employees, you're guiding them, you're leading them. If you have a family, you're serving the servant, you're also we're all serving somebody it's not, it's actually a very elevated position. So, rather than thinking, Oh, you're supposed to serve me, you're supposed to work for me. And, you know, and then this is when we cut connections, right? The heart to heart connection gets cut, when we only speak for ourselves without giving to others.

Nik Tarascio 

Yeah, well, I think that's a beautiful place to wrap this up. It's what an interesting conversation that really, for me started around food, and how to eat well how to get connected to your food, but really, it's about getting connected to yourself and others. And I really liked that heart to heart connection with really an invitation and all of this just to be of service to others. And I think that's, you know, that following that path, of take care of your body, take care of yourself, so you can be able to take care of others. And again, in aviation, when we say put on your own oxygen mask before you don anybody else's.

And I think in many ways, our Aveda can be seen as the same thing as take care of yourself so you can take care of others and be of service. And again, it's such an inspirational story to talk to someone who talks about defying the odds, it sounds like you've just had such an incredible journey from Communism, to building these amazing things that serve so many people here in New York. And all over the world I imagined to

Divya alter 

Oh, thank you. So kind. I'm always like, even though we're going through expansion of our company, and I'm like, we're going against all against all odds, but somehow it's working. It's like, it's not, it's not an easy process, I have to tell you, like, because before so just last thing, we, my husband and I, we were both monks before we got married, and I was a monk for 15 years, he was a monk for about the same time. And, and in, you know, and I was kind of like puffed up a little bit. I'm so spiritual, oh, I'm sorry, the hands didn't. I can recite Sanskrit by memory, and, you know, all these things and chanting and meditating.

And I kind of became puffed up. And I was looking down on people in business, because I thought, Oh, they're just materialists and doing material things. And like, they're greedy. So it was such an unhealthy state of mind for some time. And then boom, Oh, you think you're so advanced that I got really sick. And literally everything that I was borrowing strength from was taken away. And you're like, you know, so right now running our business is, to us is really we're just talking about this yesterday how running a business, which may seem like a very material activity can be a perfect path for spiritual upliftment and elevation and awakening. Because it's always about the inner disposition of what's your inner disposition, your intention, where's your heart when you do all these external things. And this can make such a big difference in your perception, but also, also your contribution.

But also, yes, it's important to have goals, it's very important to lead a goal oriented life, but honor the journey, the path itself, because that's where the real growth happens. It's not the achievement itself, is getting there. When, when we when we grow the most.

Nik Tarascio 

Well, I have to say, You're the first entrepreneur that I've spoken to, maybe ever, who when I asked kind of what your future path was, you were like, I don't know, whatever presents itself, I will give myself fully to that. And I think that that is true agility. When you think about it, it's like the most agile way to build something, it's just to say, I'll know it when I see it. And I will give myself fully to it. So you're absolutely right. Entrepreneurship is a spiritual path, whether people realize it or not. And I think you're living proof of the fact that you can break all the rules and you can do it all different ways. And if you just trust your heart connection, and you trust that, that gut instinct, you can do some amazing, amazing stuff.

Divya alter 

I think this is your blessing, Nik. Thank you. I keep that in mind because I need motivation to but thank you so much for your kind words. It's it's very, very humbling for me.

Nik Tarascio 

My pleasure. And again, for those you that are listening, if you're interested to learn more about what Divya is up to, you could go to Divyas.com. She has an incredible seasonal food box on there that you could check out if you want to experience Ayurveda cooking.

Also, again, this really is something we don't do any sponsorships on here and we don't take any money for this. This is art for me not commerce. I truly love her masterclass. So when I say that if you're curious, learn just to learn more about this and find it maybe there is some curiosity or connection there. You could check out her masterclass on the same website. And she was kind enough to give us a discount code of dream 100. And if you put that in, you'll save $100 off the class. So if you want to check that out, we'll put some other stuff in the show notes. But again, this was something that is just so near and dear to my curiosity and I hope some of you were inspired by this as well. And Divya, thank you again so much for giving your your entire heart to the conversation.

Divya alter 

Thank you. Thank you so much for having such a pleasure. I can't wait to see you in the restaurant again. Thank you.

Nik Tarascio 

Absolutely Take care. Bye bye. Thank you for listening to the dream beyond. I hope that you received whatever message or inspiration you were meant to get from today's episode. I had a great time recording it for you. If you love the show, please take 30 seconds to subscribe rate and review it. That really helps get the word out. And if you want to connect with me, you can find me at

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[justanearth-boundmisfit]

I bet metas are gonna justify Dean's word as him being hurt. Bitch, even if you're hurt you can't say such things to someone you care about. And especially because of someone you tried to kill but suddenly don't and now you act like a concerned daddy.

Hi darling! Under the cut it goes because LONG AF RANT. Sorry that I didn’t reply sooner, I was in a bad headspace almost all day and I have to put some thoughts in order first…

The metas right now are all over the place. Throughout the year they were babbling about characterization and the progression of the characters’ story lines and how they were growing up, and how mature the arcs were and bla bla bla. NOW they are comparing that scene with season 6 like it’s a good thing to have 1.a repeated and hurtful story line and 2. Dean regressing to be an abusive idiot. Btw not sure now if he ever stopped being one, more so when I read in an interview that ackles was portraying Dean as John all these years, big yikes! it even makes more sense how much hatred he puts into this kind of interactions with Cas, after all he IS an alcoholic with tons of issues that the show is always glossing over or laughing about like: “haha! Dean is on a bender again!” I used to love Dean, don’t get me wrong, and in an alternative universe or with better writers he could’ve been a fantastic character. What we had today is a man that has violence/verbal abuse/alcohol as a coping mechanism and is really hurtful to see that, because yeah John 2.0. Of course I blame the writers, not Dean, he’s a construct, a fictional character that had so.much.potential. oh well…

But I digress. Going back to metaland, they really don’t know how to justify things: “Dean is hurt! so he’s lashing out, and this IS SO GOOD GUYS! so good to destiel! Because imagine the level of ANGST! and how THAT is going to pay off later! o.m.g. I’m living!!!” Which I really find disgusting af because I’m sure if they translated this kind of interaction into a real life relationship or even into other show’s ships, they will be making posts about how toxic being with a person like that is, and shouting to the skies HOW WRONG it is to fetishize something like that. They like to complain about how the codependency between the bros is toxic, but when it comes to Dean and Cas: “IT’S SO GOOD THAT DEAN IS TREATING CAS LIKE THAT! OMG!”…And they act like that because it’s THEIR show and they have to justify horrible writing and repetitive stories, they accept how Dean is lashing out AGAIN towards Cas and what’s even worse, embracing it and celebrating it. It’s just a disgusting way of writing meta, because they really are not seeing the issues here, they are blind by the power that the justification of a ship that is, at this point, one of the biggests things that the show has to keep on going, brings them.They know they have to keep the wheel rolling, because as tptb stans that they are, they feel like it’s a must, to defend every little, or in this case big, fuck ups the writers do. Also because bobo! wrote the next episode and bobo can do no wrong! 

There’s also the matter of being powerful in fandom, which they absolute love.  Because lbh there are tons of people hurting right now that take the metaland as the last resource of hope, trying to find at least some light at the end of the tunnel when, sadly, there’s nothing…. It’s a gross form of manipulation and they know it. But they don’t care. 

Also the dismissal of Cas’ pain and mistreatment over and over again in Dabb`s era show us how little they care for him or how much THEY DO NOT WANT a story that really elevates Cas as the independent being that at this point he should be. It’s easier to write and write about an, at this point, almost non existent ship, to maintain the status quo of how great spn is and how amazing their showrunners/writers are with the subtext. Which is a complete lie as we already know. Now on its 14th season spn doesn’t really need that kind of angst, they have it in spades, this is nothing new and nothing good can come out of it. So to say that people “don’t understand drama” like I read some meta saying, it’s really just dismissing how pointless the whole issue is, to only preserve, first themselves, second their lies and third a show that should be so much more on the end of its 14th year. They write about spn like it’s show that is on its 4th or 5th season, when in fact we already have seen this trope so many times before throughout the years that we are either bored or angry or both. So the “people are stupid and don’t understand drama tropes like we do because we are smarter!” is totally invalid. Even if some people are not into analyzing shows/movie tropes, that doesn’t mean that they are not smart to recognize a move that is only bringing angst for the sake of angst and doesn’t bring anything new to the table. It’s horrible that they are treating people that are angry about that promo and what could potentially mean, as having a lesser intelligence just because they don’t agree with them. At this point these metas are turning into bullies and what’s worse treating everybody like they are beneath them, only shows how biased, opportunistic and dismissive they are. They are just willing to say ANYTHING to fit their writings and opinions, when they have been proven wrong over and over again. 

Remember how they were all for the angst! after Cas’ death on season 12? They were just repeating over and over again how good of a thing it was for Cas to be dead and not to even be on screen later when he came back, “because that gave Dean an opportunity to grow and appreciate Cas more, and it gave Cas and also the opportunity to be reborn and be “cured” of his depression!”. And? Did anything of that came to pass? Here we are with a Dean that is even more aggressive and toxic than before, and a Cas that still hasn’t found his place, is depressed af, calls himself a “thing” and doesn’t care if he dies for Jack or for the bros because he doesn’t value himself enough. And still takes shit from the bros, especially Dean, over and over again, instead of confronting him and saying some truths like it should have happened years ago. He’s been called a dog, a pet, he is powerless when the story calls for it which is almost all the time, he gets shouted at for things the bros have done in the past too or for even doing nothing at all, and the story line is back to season 6. Look how great the angst helped things progressed characterization wise! But sure, let the metas call people stupid because they don’t understand the drama! tropes…. Give me a break. 

And yes, we can say that MAYBE the promo was misleading, but really was it? the more I look at it the more it looks like Cas is taking Dean’s shit again, without deserving it, “you’re dead to me” or not, this kind of drama adds NOTHING to the story, much less for Cas, it’s only, a. a bait for the people that like when Dean and Cas are punching each other and find that romantic or b. it could also be the last nail in the coffin for destiel. Because there’s no doubt that they have been burying it since season 13 at least. How convenient when spn is going into his last season this is… Not that I care much about destiel at this point, for me it has been dead in canon for a long long time, Dabb just made the bait bigger to keep audiences coming back. That promo showed us how much they like to play with bs like that. 

TL:DR In the end what this kind of metas show to this fandom is how little consideration they have for other people that don’t read the situation as they do. And how they are willing to even call people stupid or idiots because they have another point of view. I don’t see anything smart about their writings and justifications, I just see desperation, arrogance and a great deal of denial, that sadly other people are copying from them and going through fandom policing everybody who dares to say: Cas deserves better. 

And ffs he does deserves SO MUCH BETTER.

Sorry it got long as usual, but as you can imagine, I’m pretty mad. 

I send you a hug. 

[bratz-kitten]

venus through the houses

venus in the 1st house: your very existence is magnetic. people are very attracted to you and show it by constantly wanting to be around you. you radiate charm and friendliness, and you may love to be surrounded by people, and social interactions have a flirty nature to them. but even if everyone around you is entranced by your physical appearance, you might struggle a lot with insecurities, resorting to self-deprecating humor to cope. you have a life-long mission of learning to love yourself and that true beauty comes from within. you shouldn't get too obsessed with others' opinions of you. you give a lot of importance to your individual style and sense of aesthetic. you find value and beauty in every being. you radiate vulnerability. 

venus in the 2nd house: your voice is absolutely alluring! people feel very attracted to it. to you, love is comfort - you want to surround yourself in an aesthetically pleasing environment. a talent for business and art. it's probable you'll make a career out of one of your hobbies. this placement gives luck when it comes to financial comfort + accumulating wealth, and it's no longer that this placement is associated with having sugar daddies - your partner will most likely be much richer than you. you might struggle with compulsive spending, though. you crave admiration. loyalty and devotion are very important to you, and you might be very possessive. you're a caretaker - you're very attentive to the needs of those you love. 

venus in the 3rd house: you love people with who you can keep intellectual and endlessly interesting conversations/discussions for hours and hours on end! you love complimenting others, and you're so gifted at communication that it's very easy for you to use flattery to get what you want - that and the fact that you love playing mind games makes for a very dangerous combination. a sucker for dirty talk. a need to be constantly intellectually stimulated. imaginative and curious. you love analyzing the way your partner thinks and you can be fascinated with someone's mind and their interests. your need to be constantly entertained can make it difficult to maintain a long-term relationship, which is why you need to feel fulfilled in the other parts of your life as well, like your hobbies and career. a talent for talking, writing, poetry. 

venus in the 4th house: you feel like home. living in a comfortable, safe and beautiful house is very important to you, just like establishing a family. your relationship with your family, friends and significant other is of utmost importance to you and you feel the need to create a loving atmosphere for them. although being nurturing is an amazing quality, your attachment to your partner can be so overwhelming that it can lead to break-ups. you're terrified of stressful situations, scandals and chaos, and you absolutely need to focus on being in a peaceful environment and one where you can pursue your happiness. very nostalgic and overprotective of loved ones. you need your partner to constantly reassure you of their love to you or you'll go crazy with feelings of jealousy and insecurity. you love helping others, and you inspire love and trust in those around you. 

venus in the 5th house: you're literally idealized by many as the perfect partner. you're absolutely crazy about romance and achieving happiness through life's pleasures. you're looking for a partner who's just as charming and fun as you. your loyal nature makes you want a life-long lasting relationship, and you'll likely be a great parent, and your kids will bring you immense happiness. you might be very popular and have a flair for the dramatics, loving it when the attention is all on you. you want to show off your partner to everyone, being very proud of them. you find having crushes on people something that's very fun and light-hearted. very romantic - you love museum dates, picnics, giving and receiving roses and you just love when someone makes it their mission to conquer your heart. very magnetic. be careful of basing your self-love on the way others feed your ego, because when you're not receiving that kind of attention, you can become insecure, lonely and as if you're not enough. 

venus in the 6th house: you're very supportive of your significant other and your express your love through acts of service and small gestures - it's as if you want to take all of their hurt and the weight on their shoulders, not caring about how that will take a toll on you. this can be very toxic especially if you fall for someone who takes advantage of your giving nature. you need someone eager to serve you just as you serve them. you naturally earn the respect and adoration of others. you enjoy routine and balance, and you're very thoughtful to others' details and needs, with a huge sense of duty. be careful of being easily manipulated. you also need to work on your low self-esteem and find a way to love yourself and find value outside of your achievements and hard work. you have an obsession with perfection. your indirect way of showing affection might be very misunderstood by others, making you come off as unemotional and unromantic when really you love painfully hard. 

venus in the 7th house: you're very attached to the person with who you're in a relationship with! when venus falls in the house of relationships, this is truly where you feel the most emotionally fulfilled. you seek peace and harmony with your partner, and you hate arguing - it truly takes a toll on your stability. be careful with losing yourself too much when in a relationship and losing your sense of individuality, and also with needing the approval of those close to you too much. your magnetism can give you great luck when it comes to attracting the right kind of people, and you get along with a lot of people. you're the type to have dreamt about the day of your marriage ever since you were a little kid. you give your all when in love, so don't let others take advantage of that. very romantic, you love exploring new things and being a sensual being. you have a very high need for respect and to be appreciated. very positive and talented, with a special charm that makes many dream of being with you. 

venus in the 8th house: you love intimacy and are not at all interested in surface-level friendships and relationships. it might be difficult for you to allow yourself to be intimate with others because you're a very closed-off person who needs a closed-circle of friends, and they're the only ones who get past your intimidating walls and right onto the genuine and caring person underneath. you're not interested in casual relationships and one-night stands. when you do allow yourself to open up to a potential partner, you seek intensity, possessiveness, drama and a meaningful connection. you're terrified of betrayal and being cheated on. a need for loyalty and trust. penetrating eyes and sexual energy. you express your love through sex, making friendships and business relations. very devoted to your partner. you might have a thing for dark, mysterious and secretive people! you also love getting to know absolutely everything about your person. you’re also very secretive yourself and love to keep your secrets hidden from everyone but the few chosen ones.

venus in the 9th house: you crave adventure and new experiences! you might fall in love very easily, but it's always with people who bring something new into your life. freedom is very important to you, so when your partner threatens that in any way and when you feel like you're not learning anything new from them, you'll leave. you love the idea of exploring the world with someone by your side. you love traveling, learning and philosophy, and have a very open mind, and your love for freedom makes you very independent. very attractive hips and thighs. you're very fun to be around!  you love life and you love to love. you make friends very easily. a sucker for spontaneity - routine simply drives you crazy. you fall in love with someone's spirit, someone with who you share many interests, not with looks and social status! 

venus in the 10th house: people constantly experience falling in love with you at first sight – which is almost always one-sided because you have incredibly high standards. you love being the center of attention, and although you have this distant and cold yet oddly intriguing aura about you, you’re very warm on the inside, but only with the few you trust. incredibly charismatic. power turns you on, and you fantasize a lot about student/teacher and worker/boss type of dynamics: you fucking love power-play and want an older, more powerful, more experienced, richer and of a higher social-status partner.. which is just your luck, because you’re practically a magnet for those people. you have a very high sense of aesthetic and love presenting an image of beauty and perfection to the world - an attempt to hide the turbulence of emotions underneath. 

venus in the 11th house: for you to fall in love with someone, you need to build a very strong sense of friendship with them first! one of your favorite tropes is friends to lovers or enemies to friends to lovers. you love making friends and you impulsively do so, taking a lot of pleasure from group activities and social gatherings. you place a lot of value in all the kinds of relationships in your life, and your loved ones simply adore you. you love bringing people together, and you easily adapt to the environment and people with who you're with. you can be interested in more than one person at a time. very humanitarian, you fight for the causes most important to you, and you need to be careful with only seeing the best in people while ignoring their flaws. 

venus in the 12th house: you over-idealize love to the point where it feels like something straight out of a movie. you're attracted to forbidden love, star-crossed love, unattainable love. you're very caring and pure-hearted. love is very private and personal to you. you need to be careful about putting your partner on a pedestal, though - you love very hard but you also tend to give all you have to your loved ones, and many might take advantage of that. it's very easy for you to get hurt in love, and your love life might be very complicated. you can also be afraid of openly expressing your feelings. you have a very mysterious and enigmatic aura. healing powers through touch. don't let your past experiences shatter your perception of love - don't let your dark past dim your light. 

[miraculouswolf99]

Miraculous Ladybug/Ever After High Crossover Idea

Since I already posted an idea for Miraculous and Monster High, I thought to also post an idea for Miraculous and its sister series, Ever After High. I am a big fan of both of the shows and I did not like at all that both of the shows were canceled even when they were both amazing.

The idea starts with how the world of Fairy Tales would actually be known to the mortal world. Something that would not be that much of a shock given that magic was already known because of Ladybug, Cat Noir, Hawkmoth, and every other miraculous-related magical event. Plus, because of White Wolf, Beautifly, and Eagle, it was also shown that there was magic in other areas of the world as well. So, all of that would show that the Fairy Tale world would only be shocking at first, but then everyone would just accept it.

The students at Dupont would actually be given the unique chance to have a field trip to Ever After High. Their school was chosen because they lived in Paris, which was the most magical city in the mortal world because of the magical heroes and villains in the city.

The students were definitely all excited to meet the sons and daughters of the stories that they all grew up with. Rose was especially excited to meet anyone from the Sleeping Beauty tale because Sleeping Beauty is sometimes also called Briar Rose. Plus, if there is anyone that loves fairy tales, it would be Rose.

Chloe was the only one that was not allowed to come since she would be under house arrest from her actions as Miracle Queen.

Adrien would also be someone that would fall in love with the magical place. Because he had basically been raised by Disney films because of his neglectful father, he had been really excited to see a world of fairy tales. It was definitely something that made Vallia, Kim, and Juleka all tease him for being so adorable in his excitement. Lyon called it cute.

Of course, given that the place is both amazing and full of basically famous people, Lila basically has to lie. As soon as she would hear how the most loved stories were Snow White, Cinderella, and Sleeping Beauty, she would pick one of those stories to lie about. So, she chooses Sleeping Beauty and starts claiming to be a direct descendant of a past Sleeping Beauty. She wanted to choose Snow White at first but decided against it since she doubted that even her class of sheep would believe a girl with her skin tone could be related to the woman that was literally known for being "white as snow."

And as usual, the class would eat it up as if it was their last meal. The only ones not believing her were the ones outside of her circle of sheep. Which was basically the entire school, not that she even knew that since she believed herself to be beyond being exposed as the liar she is. Adrien, Lyon, Vallia, Kim, Juleka, and Nathaniel would all also not believe her since they were the circle of friends against Lila.

They would have included Marinette, but Adrien was not comfortable around her. Vallia and Juleka used to be part of the Girl Squad until both of them disagreed with how Marinette deals with her crush. They both thought that it was creepy and that she was obsessed with Adrien. As soon as they both saw her schedule of his activities for the next three years, all the presents she had for him until he was fifty, her wall of pictures, and all the other things that she had done because of her crush, they both left that toxic group. They had to tell Adrien about everything Marinette did since he was her target. Adrien immediately started avoiding Marinette after that. He did not want to have to deal with another stalker. Not that it actually made Marinette stop obsessing over him since she was convinced that he would love her one day.

So, once they all got to Ever After High, the group of friends with brain cells instantly separated from the sheep. They did not want to have to deal with them obsessing over Lila and her lies. Not that they actually thought this lie would make it very far considering that the actual son or daughter of Sleeping Beauty was probably in the school somewhere. And whoever they were probably would not want anyone to lie about being connected to their mom.

Plus, as the group separated from the sheep, they actually found themselves drawn toward the Rebels rather than the Royals. The Royals that they talked to were really focused on the whole "destiny" thing that their world was supposed to be all about. The group did know about the whole thing where the children would sign their Storybook of Legends in order to re-live their parent's story.

But, at the same time, they did not actually agree with that idea. It was one thing for the Royals to want to get their "destiny" since they were the ones that wanted to live happily ever after. But, the Rebels that they talked to were almost nothing like their parents. It made sense why they would not want to sign away their freedom to live a "destiny" that they were not happy with.

Probably the first person they thought of that made them not believe in the "destiny" thing was Raven Queen. The girl was really sweet and kind, the opposite of her supposed destiny as the next Evil Queen. And she also really hit it off with Lyon given that just like her, he was often stereotyped as well since a lot of people label him as the Ice Prince.

And all the other Rebels that the group meets are also great people as well. Nathaniel is really intrigued by Ceder and her honesty curse, especially since she does not even want to try and lie just to be like her father, Pinnochio. Marc bonds with Hunter and Ashlynn because is a sucker for their entire Royal-Rebel love story while also getting roped in by Hunter for some archery lessons. Kim actually becomes friends with Darling since he actually loves that she wanted to break stereotypes and become a hero rather than a damsel in distress. Juleka also becomes friends with Cerise as the two of them were both shy as well as both having a hard time letting loose around anyone other than their closest friends. And Vallia actually becomes close with Ginger since the girl was literally sweet as sugar as well as so focused on never being like her child-eating mother.

Probably the most unexpected friendship of all was between Adrien and Maddie. But, Adrien actually really liked Maddie's eccentric personality as well as her never letting anyone else tell her how to act. She was the exact opposite of how he always had to be perfect in every way or be punished by his father.

Of course, being around the Rebels also means that the group would end up seeing the conflicts between them and the Royals. Those like Apple are always hounding them to accept their destinies no matter what they were. Apple specifically goes after Raven in order to become the next Evil Queen no matter how many times Raven tells her that she wants her own happily ever after rather than just being a villain.

There is also how the Royals are constantly trying to get those like Adrien and Vallia on their side. They believed that since they were both obviously the most "royal" of the group, they would like to be friends with the Royals. Especially since Adrien is known as the Sunshine of Paris while Vallia is also called the Flower Princess. Except, their efforts only make Adrien and Vallia want to avoid them even more since they were definitely not comfortable with them trying to basically force them into seeing things how they see them.

Plus, the Royals also happened to have befriended Marinette. She had apparently befriended them since she liked the entire Fairy Tale stereotypes that they believed in. Such as the typical "love at first sight" cliche. And those like Apple seem to have teamed up with Alya for their "Adrinette" plans since she liked the entire false romance that Marinette and Alya had made up. Not that it was made up to those two since they actually did seem to believe that Marinette and Adrien were made for each other.

It was probably the one thing that could get Marinette to ever focus on when she was not slowly going crazy over Lila and her lies. But, she currently would just ignore the Italian liar as long as she did not try and get Adrien for herself. Plus, it also fed into Marinette's obsession with Adrien when he would constantly avoid Lila as well as scold her whenever Lila would try and latch onto his arm. To Marinette, that was Adrien trying to save himself for the right girl, which was her in her mind.

You also can not have any kind of trip without Hawkmoth doing something to ruin it. He takes advantage of an argument that breaks out between the Royals and Rebels. Especially when Vallia slaps Daring when he would not stop bothering her as well as telling her "every girl falls for me, they can't help it." And Vallia also did not like it when she told him that she was dating Kim, which made Daring insult Kim by calling him "an ugly gorilla."

Vallia's VERY big rejection of Daring was what got him akumatized. Hawkmoth made him an akuma similar to Reflekta and Dark Cupid, but with a twist. Anyone he zapped with his powers would either turn into a copy of him if they were a boy or would make them fall in love with him if they were a girl.

This ended up actually being what exposed Marinette as Ladybug to Adrien. She was hit by the love beam, making Tikki take the earrings from her to keep Marinette from giving them to the akumatized Daring as a "gift to show her love." Adrien happened to see Tikki take the earring, so he put the pieces together for him to find out that she was Ladybug. Tikki noticed Adrien and went over to him, giving him the earrings and apologizing for Marinette's behavior regarding her obsessive crush on him. He did not blame Tikki.

But because Ladybug was affected by the akuma, Adrien knew that he needed some backup. So, he used the portal between the fairy tale and mortal worlds to go back to Paris in order to get the Miracle Box from Marinette's room. He figured that she would have it since Ladybug was named guardian and Marinette was Ladybug. Plus, he was definitely not going to let her keep it now knowing about her horrible behavior.

He ended up giving the fox to Nathaniel, the turtle to Marc, the bee to Juleka, and the monkey to Kim. They had all managed to avoid Daring's powers. But even with all of them as well as White Wolf and Beautifly, it was hard with the number of people under Daring's control. So, Adrien took the chance and gave some of the miraculous to their Ever After friends. Raven got the tiger, Hunter got the ox, Ashlynn got the pig, Ceder got the goat, Darling got the dragon, Cerise got the dog, Ginger got the horse, and Maddie got the mouse.

They were able to defeat the akumatized Daring. Adrien quickly hid so that he could de-transform and then use the ladybug to become Mister Bug again. He knew not to use both miraculous at once. He cleansed the akuma and fixed all the damage.

When Marinette snapped out of the spell and saw Mister Bug, she could not believe it. So, Mister Bug took her aside and told her that he knew who she was. But, when she held out her hand to have the miraculous being given back to her, he denied it. He then told her that as the chosen user of the black cat, he was stripping her of the ladybug miraculous and the miracle box because of her horrible behavior.

Of course, Marinette denies ever doing anything wrong. But, Mister Bug lists everything she had done to Adrien and to others. Such as breaking into Adrien's room using her Ladybug powers, using her lucky charm just to stop Adrien from slow dancing with Chloe, stalking Adrien, invading his privacy, teaming up with Chloe to sabotage Kagami just because she was on a date with Adrien, and many other things. Marinette, of course, says that she loves Adrien and never did anything wrong. She placed all the blame on those around her while also saying she never stalked Adrien or invaded his privacy.

Mister Bug glares at her as he says that just because she is a girl does not mean that she is never in the wrong just because her victim is a boy. He says that her believing that he has to love her back just because she has a crush on him was wrong and that she needed to stop being selfish with her desire for him. He also said that if she ever tried anything to get back the ladybug or the miracle box, he would reveal her actions to all of Paris.

Adrien never thought he would have to do anything like that and it hurt him for having to do that to someone he used to think of as a friend. But, he stayed strong as both Plagg and Tikki told him that he did the right thing.

As he collected the miraculous from the others, he told them all that he hoped they could team up again in the future. And if he and Raven happened to blush after they looked each other in the eye, that was something for matchmakers like Ashlynn and Vallia to worry about. Lyon, Juleka, and the others all just prepared for the headache that was going to happen as they would watch the two of them dance around each other.

[lancrewizzard]

It's been two days since I started watching the original He-Man cartoon and I'm still amazed by how much I'm enjoying it. Something about watching something new while knowing there aren't any real stakes and everything will be resolved in 20 minutes is really helping my mental health stop being on fire. I will also explode if I don't ramble about it, so this is your warning and #motu is the tag you can block to avoid it.

This is that rare and special think - a kids' cartoon where I like the heroes as much as the villains.

I wish they'd gone more into some things like He-Man actually dealing with someone getting hurt because of him in a way that wasn't just an "okay, everything's fine now, it wasn't even really his fault anyway"

But also I'm aware that that's asking too much of an 80's cartoon made to sell toys.

Engaging with it on its own terms it's dumb, fun fluff that I unironically love.

Outfits so weird and terrible they circle right back to being iconic. Bonus points for not being weirdly sexualised even when everyone on screen is wearing a bikini or hotpants.

So gay. So, so, so gay. I cannot overstate how queer this show is.

And how Adam is a perfect example of non-toxic masculinity. Definitely succeeded in their obvious goal of Setting A Good Example For The Kiddies.

The lip synch is terrible but the animation is surprisingly good.

I have really mixed feelings on the voice acting

On one hand I love that everyone speaks clearly enough that my auditory processing difficulties aren't an issue. I don't have to concentrate just to get words from the syllables spoken which means I can a) do crafts while watching and b) don't have to rely on youtube's auto-subtitles.

On the other, clarity takes precedence over actual, well, acting. This means that tense, dramatic moments are utterly ruined by a flat "nooo" from Adam. Sometimes funny, sometimes just annoying.

That one advert with He-Man and Skeletor dancing understood the series like no one else.

[citronsblog]

Hey, could I request some Hifumi, Teruteru, and Ryoma comforting their S/o from a bad break up with a toxic ex which ends in them confessing their love to the reader? I'm kinda going through that right now... It doesn't need to be perfect, I just need some comfort from my boys...

Notes: OF COURSE- im so glad I can help comfort you with my writing right now. If you need to talk I’m always available. I can send you words of encouragement! :) please I hope you feel better soon. (Sorry if any of this is poorly portrayed, I myself have never gone through this but it hurts seeing someone you know go through it)

Warnings: mention of toxic person

Characters: Hifumi Yamada, Teruteru Hanamura, Ryoma Hoshi

Teruteru Hanamura

Everything felt like hell. You were sobbing, it felt hard to breathe, your heart was hurting. Teruteru pressed his ear against the door. He felt horrible that you were going through so much pain.

He took in a breath and decided to walk, it pained him so much to see you in this state.

“Hey, s/o? D-do you want to talk about it?”

All you could manage was a small nod.

Teruteru sat next to you. He made you lay your head down on his lap as he calmly stoked your hair. Commanding you to take deep a deep breath, he let you start.

You told him all of what happened. The pain of where it started, how it hurt being manipulated, everything you though while the relationship happened.

The only emotions Teruteru felt in those moments were rage and sorrow. The rage was for you ex. He hated them and how they would ever use and hurt someone as amazing and beautiful as you. The sorrow, well the sorrow was for the pain you were going through. He wish he could take it all away, he wishes he can comfort you in this pain you’re feeling.

“S/o…. Sweetie, I am so so sorry all of this happened. If that hick thinks they can ever come near ya’ again oh it won’ be pretty thas fo’sure.”

His accent slipped through, showing the anger he held for the wrongdoings of the person who hurt you. Oh Teruteru was so mad, but he would try to tone it down to comfort you.

Reaching his hand to wipe off some of our tears he manages a gentle smile.

“Don’t cha’ ever worry ‘bout someone like that again ‘k sweets? For now, I’ll be here to comfort ya’. I’ll be by your side and offer a shoulda’ to lean on, it’s ‘cause I love ya’, It pains me to see you hurtin’ I wish I could give ya all my love and make you feel better.”

A comfortable silence fell over the two of you. You took a moment to take in his words. When you did, you felt a nice wave of comfort wash over you.

“Teru- did you….. did you just confess to me?”

“… I suppose I just did, didn’t I?”

He brushed his hand over your cheek and gave you another loving smile. He always loves the fact you were in his life, might as well take this moment to ask the question.

“Will you be mine, s/o?”

Those words brought tears to your eyes once again, but this time for a different reason. This time it was knowing you had someone who would truly love you back.

“Teruteru, I would love that.”

Ryoma Hoshi

It was the fact he hadn’t heard from you that day that led him to your door. Hearing sniffles and the faint whimpers of someone crying that made him knock on the door.

“Hey Kid, you alright in there? Mind if I come in?”

Your door was unlocked already but he wanted to ask just to give you a warning of his arrival. His eyes trailed up to your tearful ones. Seeing you like this made something in him click. He didn’t know what was going on but all he knew was he wanted to comfort you.

“S/o are you alrig- would you like to talk about it?”

He walks to you and sits right next to you. Taking your hand in his he gives you a knowing look.

“Go ahead, I’m right here for you.”

You both talked for awhile. You told him the things you went through and he scolded himself mentally for not helping you before hand. He wishes he would of gotten here sooner to help but he’s glad he is here now.

He starts to draw circles on your back in an effort to calm you down. He stops once you look at him, he takes his free hand and wipes away any tears and/or makeup that held its place on your face.

“Do you need some water? I can also go get some food and give you a few moments alone if you need that.”

“I don’t want to be alone right now… can you stay here, please.”

You voice was barely above a whisper. Ryoma understood and just took in a deep breath.

“I’m here for you when ever you need it s/o. It hurts me to see you in pain, more then I’d like to admit. Maybe it’s because I have strong feelings for you, or maybe it’s because you are the one who’s given me a purpose again. Which ever one it is, I don’t want to see you hurting. Is there anyway I can help?”

“Stay by my side for a little longer please..”

You leaned over to open your water bottle and sip from it. Ryoma moved over to where he was hugging you. It was a comforting embrace.

“… Did you just say you like me, Ryoma?”

“Well, I guess I did. I may still have a long ways to go but what do you think? Are you willing to be with me as well?”

In that moment you felt a wave of relief wash over you. Someone you’ve known, someone you trust and most of all someone you know who will love you. They’re right in front of you. It was a lovely feeling.

“I would love to, ryoma.”

Hifumi Yamada

Hifumi had just finished a story, he always had you proof read it, or give him feed back. He usually brought snacks with him as well, just in case if you were hungry! Today you were late coming to his dorm to read it, maybe you haven’t gotten the text yet? That still didn’t ease his nerves. Deciding he should go ahead and go to your room, he brought the snacks with him.

When he arrive he was met with the sound of muffled sobs and a pain in his heart.

‘Ghk- what is this horrible feeling! First I must check up on Mx. S/o!”

Knocking gently on the door he announced his presence. You let him in, the tears running down your face were noticeable.

The writer felt horrible. He had never seen you in this state and he never wanted to again. Seeing someone you love in pain is hard to bare.

“Mx. S/o?! Please, it is my duty to make sure you are alright. I will lend my ears and listen to your troubles!”

Giving a small nod you both sit down on your bed. Hifumi looks really concentrated as you speak. It’s as if he’s analyzing every small detail.

You tell him the hardships that had happened. The pain and the feeling of everything that had made you feel bad. His eyes scanned over your own. The subtle brush of his hand to your cheek was a feeling you welcomed as you melted into the contact.

“Mx. S/o, it seems this pain is almost far greater then my understanding. I will try my best to make sure you are comforted.”

Handing you the snacks he brought, he put down some water for you as well. The two of you decided to watch a new episode of the show you started. At the end of the episode Hifumi looked down at you, you were laying in his lap.

“I think I’ve concluded what that feeling was!”

You only gave him a confused look. He continued on,

“Earlier, right before coming in to comfort you I felt a pain in my chest. It was my heart aching because I knew you were hurting. I think- no! I know I’m in love with you! You are far greater then 2D. S/o, please be mine.”

You interlocked your hands with his. The nervous look he gave you was adorable.

“Of course I will Hifumi. Why wouldn’t I want to be with such an amazing guy like you?”

The smile that slowly creeped up on his face made you feel better. It felt nice, you had someone to be with. Someone who would finally treat you in the way you deserve.

[tenkoscumslut]

Hawks x reader (angst)

(credit to _yorixxxx on tiktok they inspired this)

Your mind was in its own universe, walking through a rich meadow, the smell of blue gold filling up your senses, it was almost time to go home, almost.  You almost leapt out of your chair when the clock hit 5, you little fantasy vanished, forgotten, like you.  

You couldn’t help but smile as you walked home, it was months after the incident, months.  Kiego had promised to never do it again, promised and promised and promised, but all of them were lies, though you were to blind to see it.  The familiar streets were your comfort area, you loved your life, you loved your boyfriend, his affection, your apartment, your job, everything.

As you flirted with the keys, trying to find the right one, you managed to find it.  It opened up his apartment, tonight was date night, he always did the sweetest things, he would take you out on late night flights, kiss your forehead and apologize for that one night.  His words were meaningless, but they filled you with happiness.

Before you were drowning, you head was submerged underwater and you could swim to the surface.  You were exhausted, even though it was right there, it was so close, it was in your grasp, you could never reach it.  Thats when Hawks came, he made you go head over heels for him, he was your savior, he was the one who saved you.  He picked you up, letting you take deep breaths of the fresh air, and you loved it.  You were addicted to it.

So when you opened the door, and saw another pair of shoes, you didn’t mind, you didn’t even think about any bad outcomes of this.  You quietly closed the door and set your shoes next to his, assuming he had a coworker over.  You walked up the steps into the living room, and there was Hawks with his “coworker”.

You couldn’t move, they were to loud to notice you, her loud moans, his grunts of pleasure, you could barely believe what you saw.  No, Hawks would never cheat on you, you knew Hawks, or did you.  You knew the hero, the man who saved others, the man who never broke someones heart.  But did you really know Kiego, did you know how he broke hearts, how he was a lying cheating bastard who was so toxic he couldn’t recognize your feelings.

“Hawks?”, you whimpered softly, not even knowing how to react to the lewd scene in front of you.  They both stopped, the girl, panting, a huge blush on her face turned to Hawks, “Hawks, who’s this?”, she asked trying to catch her breath.  Kiego stuttered, “J-just an old friend babe, Y/N, can you leave?’, he asked with...what was it? Irritation? Annoyance? Anger?.  

“Old friend?”, you repeated, “Were dating Hawks!”, you exclaimed, tears beginning to form, the girl clambered off of him, quickly putting on her clothes, “What the fuck do they mean Kiego?! You said you weren’t with anyone!”, she shouted.  “Y/N is lying, I don’t know them!”, he shouted, pulling up his boxers.

“You know what?! Get out! Both of you!”, you shouted over them, Kiego looked at you, shock in his eyes, the girl walked past you, she looked just as broken as you, “I’m sorry”, she whispered and quickly left the scene.  You stared at the ground, your fists were placed at your sides, Kiego walked up to you.  That voice, it made you fill up with joy, but know it felt so wrong to hear him.  “Babybird, listen to me, she didn’t mean anything”, he said.  Empty.  His words were fucking empty.

You wanted to screech, kill him, you wanted to wreck him, make him feel what you were going through.  “I already said get out Kiego” you managed to say, not bothering to speak in hopes of your voice not cracking up.  You looked up at him, those eyes, so beautiful, so ethereal.  You always thought he would only look at you like that, with so much love and passion, but behind it was emptiness.  He fucking used you.

To him you were a doll to be played with, a fucking sex toy.  You gritted your teeth when he didn’t move, instead tried to embrasse you in a hug, “Get the fuck off of me!”, you shouted, the tears finally spilling out while you kicked him, punched him, scratched him.  He didn’t let go, he couldn’t, Kiego was to selfish, he wanted you, he wanted a side chick, he wanted to fuck anyone he could but he couldn’t have you leave his side.

You were his other half, his soulmate, he truly loved you, yet he continued to hurt you, over and over and over and over.  It hurt him, sometimes he wouldn’t realize he was kissing someone else, he would try and imagine they were you, that it was your soft lips caressing his own.  That is was your walls clamping down on him, and it was your moans every time he hit their sweet spot.  Seeing you, without that smile, without that look like he was your everything made him break.

He fucking hurt you.  He did that.  “Get out Kiego!”, that was the last shout, he let go, knowing you couldn’t be with him anymore, his heart was strangled as he slowly walked over to the entrance, he’d let you stay at his apartment until you could leave.  He would give you the space he needed.  With one last look of sorrow, he left.

~~~

As the months went by, you had found a new job, away from Kiego, a knew boyfriend, a home, a new life.  It was perfect, Dabi was perfect, all that time thinking Kiego had saved you, all those times you felt like he was your savior was lies.  He blinded you, choked you, drugged you into thinking you were happy, but Dabi was your real savior.  He opened your eyes, showed you the world, real affection and loyalty, trust, everything you could possibly imagine.

Though Dabi did have his flaws, like almost burning the kitchen down when his ramen didn’t turn out perfect, he was amazing, and truly loved you.  Dabi would never go behind your back, and you would never go behind his. Ever.  

As for Kiego, he was a wreck, bringing home girls almost everyday.  They weren’t the same, they never were, you were truly one of a kind.  He was sobbing, he was forgetting your touch, your lips, you voice, it was all fading away.  He was desperately trying to salvage what was left of you, he had pictures of you in his bedroom, he cooked your favorite foods, he only dated people who looked like you but it was never enough.

Every night, their moans never riled him up, their lips wrapped around him never was the same, they never tasted as good as you, their kissed weren’t as sweet or filled with love.  Their eyes never held the same fire as yours, never the same passion.  Your sweet smell was slowly fading away to, one of the only things he had left.  

he had even bought the same perfume you would wear just to scent things and try to keep it in pristine condition.  As for the girl he was dating behind your back, seeing her walk into his office everyday made him gag, she couldn’t even compete against you.  

After months of not being able to hear your voice, enough was enough, he opened up your contact, there were tons of messages from you, left on read from when he was cheating on you and he didn’t bother to reply.  His fingers manuevered over the keyboard.

He didn’t know how to start this off, would he say sorry? Hi? How are you?, he then just settled on Hey, nothing really complex or to formal.  His heart was beating faster than ever, he set himself down at his counter, his wings flapping lightly at the prospect of you replying.

You were making dinner, just some rice and fish since you didn’t feel like making something to extravagant.  Your phone dinged next to Dabi who was watching a show, he lifted up your phone, narrowing his eyes at the unknown number.

He stood up and walked over to you, unlocking your phone to look at the message, “Hey, doll, who’s this?”, he asked, staring at the conversation before you found out Hawks was a cheating bastard.  You had deleted his contact, thinking you also blocked him.  You grabbed your phone and looked at the message, trying to remember who it was.  “i do-”, you cut yourself off when you saw the previous text messages.

“It’s my ex, you don’t need to worry about him”, you said, turning your phone off and kissing Dabi softly.  He hummed happily, his hands snacking around your waist and massaging your inner thighs.  You turned off the stove and fully turned around to kiss him, things quickly escalated, your bra was off and your panties were thrown somewhere.

Dabi was on his knees, your legs on his shoulders while he devoured you, you tugged at the roots of his hair, whining and moaning for him, crying out with he hit the perfect place.  Your orgasm was quickly building up, and then your phone rang.  Dabi pulled away from your lower lips, a scowl on his face while he glared at your phone for ruining the mood.

You picked it up, scowling when you saw it was Hawks, you did not want to talk to him, “Who is it?”, Dabi asked, tracing circles into your thighs, “my ex”, you grumbled, your thumb was about to press decline but Dabi stopped you,  “Answer it babe”, he said, you whined softly, “Why?”.  He smirked, “Do it baby, for daddy~”, he said, you pouted and answered the phone and brought it up to your ear.

Hawks wings were flapping widley when you picked up, his heart was racing, he wanted so savor your voice, memorise it, imprint it in his brain so when he manages to win you back its like you never broke up.  Like he never cheated.  Like he really was your savior.

Dabi leaned back down, and started to kiss your lower lips, his tongue traveling over your clit.  You held back a moan and managed to greet your ex, “Hello Kiego”, you said, you were greeted with a happy Hello.  Hearing his voice made sadness seep into your heart, but you were through with him, you were done, you had Dabi.  

“Why are you calling me”, you asked, your hand slithering down to pull at Dabis hair, you knew being this close to your orgasm, plus the thrill of being on the phone with Hawks was only going to end in something bad.  Dabis skilled tongue pushed into your sopping wet hole.  Your hand quickly covered your mouth, staffing another moan.

“I-I guess I just missed you...”, Hawks mumbled from the other end, “I was a fucking dick to you, I cheated on you twice and thats not right”.  Your orgasm was quickly building up again, Dabi removed his tongue and easily pushed in 2 digits, his mouth started working on your clit.  Your thighs clamped down on his head, trying to make this oh so more pleasurable.

“I was wondering you know...if we could start talking again?”, he asked, Dabi then hit the special spot he knew by memory, you couldn’t help but moan loudly.  A huge blush adorned to your face, “U-Um a-are you busy right now? C-cuz I can t-talk later?”, he suggested.  “N-no, I want to finish this conversation”, you mumbled, “I just ran into the corner of my dresser”, you lied.  Dabi was pinching at your thigh, you knew he didn’t want you to hang up.

Hawks was leaning back into the chair, a generous amount of lube coated his hand, he gripped at the base of his dick, squeezing softly, trying to replicate your walls.  He bit his lip, god just you alone had him painfully hard, and the moan that came out of the other end of the phone was the cherry on top.  His thumb ran over his sensitive head, over his sensitive slit, and rubbed back and forth.  At this rate Hawks could cum any second.

“Could we maybe meet up at the building I use to fly us to?”, he asked.  You bit your lip, another moan rising up, your release was so fucking close, you could feel it.  Your hand gripped at his wrist, not wanting him to pull away and take your sweet release with it.  “S-sure”, you were in a daze, Dabis wrist snapped forward, roughly hitting your sweet spot.  Your eyes rolled back, your body spasming and your walls fluttering around his digits.  Your sweet juices leaked out of your spasming hole.  Dabi removed his fingers and quickly started to lap at the juices.

You thought you hung up, your thumb missed and instead you put him on speaker, you started to moan and cry out, it was turning into to much, “Y/N..?”, you heard hawks through the speaker. “FUCK!”, you shouted, quickly hanging up before you could reply.  Dabi was laughing, and your face was flared with embarrassment.  He got up from his kneeling position and helped you off the counter.

Your knees were wobbly underneath you, Dabi carried you to the bed and finished what he started.

The mess on Hawks chest, there were no words to describe it.  He had cummed harder than he has ever cummed before, the thick white liquid shot out in thick salty white ropes.  His post orgasm soon kicked in, a hollow feeling burned in his chest.  He wished it was you instead of them, he wished he payed attention to you.

He wished he brought you around to parties since he knew how much you loved to dance, he wished he brought you flowers, and held your hand, he should’ve given you all his hours when he had the chance.  But know your dancing, but your dancing with another man.

And although it hurts, he’d be the first to say he was wrong, but he hoes he buys you flowers, and holds your hand, take you to every party because he remembers how much you love to dance.

[misterewrites]

Piltover’s Finest

Hey everyone! E here with a new story idea because I love writing and I have long accepted my fate of just being random with my story ideas. Arcane was such an amazing show it's hard to believe it came out of the League of Legends...anything. (great game, eh community. Try wildrift for less toxicity or just play with bots on lol. Not perfect but significantly less toxic. Also there's a card game called legends of runeterra that's pretty fun). So I decided to write about Vi and Caitlyn cuz I love their dynamic and ship.

So right now it is a oneshot but I'm also leaving it open in case i ever want to come back. Possible spoiler warnings as I am drawing from both Arcane and regular canon and kinda fusing it together. So heads up? I mean it's possible it'll never happen but I wanna cover my bases.

Okay that's it for me! Stay safe, wear a mask, wash your hands, get vaccinated and boosted if you can for the love of living, keep yourself and loved ones safe, spin around in a circle with a broom yelling "Six feet!" and push for worldwide vaccination cuz i'm really freaking tired of all this shit. Feel free to leave likes, comments, recommend this to your friends, reblogs. Honestly I love and appreciate all that and I'm just happy you wanted to read my work. Means a lot to me so thank you. Have a great week and I'll see you soon. E is out peace!

So check out this story over on the way more friendly Ao3 right here

https://archiveofourown.org/works/36807532

Fan of Arcane? Hey look another story I did right over there

https://archiveofourown.org/works/35929279

and the rest of my work if you’re interested or bored.

https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrE42/pseuds/MrE42

and now we’re here at the keep reading sign. For those of you disembarking at this stop, have a nice day.

I should not post these late at night haha.

Summary: When you see a legend, a true champion, it seems impossible to fathom how one holds such a prodigious title. Their trials, their tribulations and everything in between. But even the most legendary start on their path somewhere. Even if it's at the bottom. Arcane season 1 spoilers (also maybe possible later season spoilers)

-----

Have you ever been in a place that just felt wrong? A place so starkly different from anything you’ve ever known you can’t help but feel like you shouldn’t be here. That your mere presence upsets everything around you.

That’s how Vi felt standing in the posh, clean streets of Piltover.

It’d been weeks since Pow….Jinx, she was Jinx now, attacked the Piltover Council in a brazen display of power. Though the act was her final goodbye to that psychopath Silco, she didn’t claim the attack for Zaun. She didn’t even tell anyone she was the one behind it: Jinx simply blew up a building and vanished into thin air.

Most of the council managed to survive the initial blast due to some miraculous early warning but a few still remained in critical condition.

Vi couldn’t remember the last few weeks if she was going to be honest. She wandered the streets of this foreign land, desperate to prevent grief and guilt from consuming her. Her only purpose in life had been to find Powder and put Silco six feet in the ground. Now both were gone and she’d been left with nothing.

Part of her wanted to return to The Lanes in a childish hope that she would find purpose there. Something, anything to keep going.

She knew better though: Her beloved Lanes died when Vander did and returning would not change the fact that only Zaun, Silco’s legacy, remained in its stead. Not to mention the shimmer that ran rampant in the streets and the chembarons who still held tight control over the city. Going back there with nothing more but the clothes on her back would never end well for her.

Piltover, however, wasn’t much of a better choice: Everything was too polished, too clean and just wrong. While having air that didn’t burn your throat with poisonous toxins and actual sunlight was nice, Pilties were uncomfortable with the idea of a undercity thug wandering their streets freely. Vi noticed the hushed whispers and sideways glances she got whenever she walked on the street. While The Lanes had the odd Enforcer patrol here and there, here in the “City of Progress” they were everywhere. On every other street corner, walking in pairs down alleyways and on the rooftops. Maybe it was the recent tension between the two cities but Vi found it awfully convenient that there was always one nearby whenever she did anything.

“Would you stop!?” Vi shouted angrily as she turned around, startling the enforcer that not so subtly been tailing her.

The enforcer flinched, dropping their gun to the floor in surprise. They scrambled to pick up their fallen weapon and hide their panic.

Vi scoffed “Greenie aren’t we?”

“No!” The enforcers voice cracked.

Vi rose an eyebrow, unimpressed.

“I mean…” The enforcer cleared their throat “I’m not following you.”

“Yes you are.”

“I am not...ma’am.”

“You’ve been trailing me since I left the alley.” Vi rolled her eyes, unable to hide her annoyance “About three blocks ago. You like to scrape the floor with your left foot.”

The enforcer paled “I…”

“Leave me alone.” Vi muttered quietly “I’m not really up for this shit right now.”

The enforcer paused for a moment, weighing their options. Evidently they decided it was best to listen to her because they gave a short nod and turned around, quickly making their way as far away from her as possible.

Vi sighed, blowing a strain of pink hair out of her face.

“Maybe Bilgewater is nice this time of year.” she whispered under her breath “Booze, guns and piracy. It’ll be like I’m a kid again.”

“I wouldn’t recommend that.” A familiar refined voice said softy “I rather like you as an adult.”

Vi felt her cheeks warm as Caitlyn stood next to her, a cheeky smile dancing on her lips.

“Whoa cupcake when did you get here?” Vi backed up.

“About three seconds ago.” Caitlyn replied simply “When you decided to lightly threaten an enforcer.”

“Suggested.” Vi countered impishly “Threatening an enforcer is a crime after all.”

Caitlyn shook her head in disbelief “Of course. So suggesting is what we’re calling it?”

“It is what it is cupcake.”

“Right.” Caitlyn crossing her arms with finality “Well since we’re suggesting things.”

Vi narrowed her eyes suspiciously “I don’t like where this is going.”

Caitlyn chuckled playfully “I doubt you would but the fact remains you cannot be running around in the streets Vi.”

“Oh no.”

“Oh yes.” Caitlyn said, a hint of a threat in her voice “Come back to my home. I have more than enough space to accommodate you.”

Vi raised a hand to stop her “Sorry, hard pass cupcake. I didn’t come up here to be a pet.”

Caitlyn let out a cute frustrated noise that made Vi’s heart skip a beat “I will not allow you to wallow in self pity!”

“I’m not wallowing in anything princess.” Vi growled “I’m casing joints so I can rob them later. You know like the big bad undercity bitch I am.”

“Vi!”

Vi rolled her eyes sarcastically “What? It’s the truth, isn’t it? I failed as a sister, I failed to be a hero and I sure as fuck failed to stop your mom from being blown up!”

Vi turned away, realizing she had taken it a step too far. How could she be so stupid? Really Violet you were going to bring up how her mother was nearly killed by your sister. Why don’t you spit in her face and kick her while she’s down? Oh wait you already did that!

Vi’s heartbeat thundered loudly in her ears as she felt the warm embrace of Caitlyn’s arms wrapping around her tightly.

They stayed like that for a moment, an understanding in the pain they both shared.

“You need to stop.” Caitlyn whispered gently in her ear “Blaming yourself for what happened won’t fix anything.”

Vi remained silent, shame eating at her resolve.

“My mother will recover thankfully.” Caitlyn continued “And I know how important your sister was to you. I don’t blame you for what happened but you can’t hold onto the guilt Vi.”

Vi took a shaky breath.

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“It was.” Vi said, turning to face Caitlyn “If I just accepted what everyone had been saying.” her voice grew louder, more desperate and laced with pain “If I just accepted that she wasn’t Powder anymore, that she wasn’t my sister anymore I could’ve stopped her! I could’ve stopped all this! I could’ve…!”

Vi’s eyes widen as Caitlyn gently placed a finger on her lips.

“You talk too much Vi.” she teased before cupping the pink hair girl’s cheek “You are a product of the schism between our cities, not the cause.”

Vi could feel the tears forming. She closed her eyes to stop them.

“Vi.” Caitlyn’s sweet voice echoed in the darkness “She is still your sister. Not the one you knew but family all the same. And we must stop her.”

Stop Jinx? Could she even do that? Could she bring herself to raise her fists against her own flesh and blood? Vi still had nightmares about that faithful night, the regrets that haunted her in that lonely cell for all those years.

“Vi.”

Vi slowly opened her eyes, stormy gray meeting sapphire blue.

“We need to stop her.” Caitlyn spoke with an authoritative firmness “Only you and I can bring her in safely.”

“You’d do that?” Vi asked, unable to keep the awe out of her voice “For me?”

“For you.” Caitlyn’s eyes widen as she took a step away and breaking their embrace “F-for Piltover!” she quickly added, brushing nonexistence dirt off her skirt “The others won’t care she is a broken girl destroyed by our war. We cannot allow this senseless circle of violence but we also can’t let her cause untold mayhem and panic.”

Vi chuckled. She stretched her arms as she tried to discreetly wipe the tears away.

“Okay cupcake.” Vi gave a cocky grin “You’re the enforcer thug. Where do we start?”

You could hear a pin drop in the silence that followed.

Vi tilted her head curiously “Cupcake?”

Caitlyn gave a strained smile as she nervously played with a strain of her hair.

Vi gave her a deadpan stare.

“Well…” Caitlyn said slowly “I’m...not...actually an enforcer anymore.”

“I’m sorry what? Excuse me?”

Caitlyn gave Vi a pointed finger “Let me explain.”

“What do you mean you’re not an enforcer anymore?!”

“I was fired.” Caitlyn admitted “After the bombing.”

By Jinx went unsaid for which Vi was grateful for.

“My parents talked to Marcus and convinced him to get me off the force for my safety.”

“Wow.” Vi clicked her tongue disappointingly “That sucks and blows. Wait, how did you get me out of Stillwater then? You said it was for a case.”

Caitlyn cutely twiddled her thumbs “I sort of….lied.’

Vi couldn’t tell which she was more: surprised or impressed.

“You? Lied?” Vi asked, disbelieving.

“Only because I knew I can solve the case!” Caitlyn added quickly, with a hint of pride Vi noticed.

Vi stuck up her nose as she took on a mocking posh tone “That isn’t very elegant for a refined lady such as yourself.”

Caitlyn playfully shoved Vi “Oh shut it.”

“But now I gotta know. How did you get me out?”

“Forged Jayce’s handwriting on some council documents.” she answered casually as if discussing the weather.

“Forgery and Fraud.” VI whistled appreciatively while giving her a cheeky wink “You know what I like.”

Caitlyn could feel her cheeks burn “Don’t you start.”

Vi gave a good nature laugh but dropped the subject “Okay cupcake so what now?”

“We need to get back on the force.”

“We?”

“We” Caitlyn confirmed as if it was the most obvious thing in the world “Otherwise we leave your sister’s fate up to chance.”

“Okay.” Vi nodded in a daze “Me, an enforcer? I died and I’m in hell.”

Caitlyn nudged her “The only way for us to make a difference is in the system.”

“Not when the system is corrupted” Vi countered.

Caitlyn scratched her chin thoughtfully “True. There’s telling how deep this runs and we have no idea who else was in on Marcus’s machinations.”

“Oooo machinations? I love it when you talk dirty to me.”

“Vi!” Caitlyn shrieked, unable to keep the blush off her face anymore “I’m serious.”

Vi raised her hands in surrender “I’m done, I’m done. So we burn down the system and make a better one. Easier said cupcake. Where do we start?”

“Jayce.”

“Pretty boy?”

“I know you have your reservations about him but he is a good man. Misguided and utterly vain but a good man.”

Vi rolled her eyes “If you say so.”

Caitlyn turned to face her face set in a grim determination “Do you trust me?”

Vi thought back to their adventures: Caitlyn saving her from her ill advised fight with Sevika, trading her only defense in the harsh undercity to heal her, offering her home as safehouse after the disastrous incident on the bridge and now giving her new purpose in life.

Did she trust Caitlyn?

“With my life.” Vi answered honestly, allowing some vulnerability to slip through.

The smile Caitlyn gave her was more lovely the fresh air and the sun. Combined.

“Well then.” She slipped her arm in Vi’s “We’re on the case!”

Vi couldn’t help but smile in return as the pair made their way toward Jayce’s workshop “Piltover’s Finest!”

“We are not calling ourselves that.”

“I dunno, I kinda like it.”

And Vi meant it.

[1ddotdhq]

🎥 Fri Sept 11 🏆

Hope everyone is doing alright, says Louis on Twitter. NO I AM NOT, THANK YOU FOR ASKING! Why??? Because Harry is set to be in Olivia Wilde’s new thriller movie, “Don’t Worry Darling” alongside Dakota Johnson, Florence Pugh, Chris Pine (O captain, my captain!), and Wilde herself! It seems he might be playing Pugh’s husband, a man named Clifford (no, not the dog), a loving husband with a dark secret. According to Collider, he will be playing the lead male role in the movie - LOVE THAT FOR HIM! It has not been officially confirmed, but it looks legit, judging from the outlets that are reporting it. Also, Anne Twist tweeted, “ ‘don’t worry darling’ @Harry_Styles, you’re going to be AMAZING! 😉”. She deleted the tweet two minutes later, but this does seem to be confirmation.

A preliminary spoiler review is making its way around the interwebs, and, *SPOILER ALERT* Harry will be playing an abusive husband who has drugged his wife into an alternate 1950s reality. Harry will most certainly NOT be playing a Good Guy here, and there seem to be heavy topics that will be covered throughout the movie. This Intern HATES horror/thriller movies, so I will probably be skipping it, but I am SO EXCITED to see how he approaches a character that is so wildly different than who he is irl.

Where there’s a Harry, there’s Louis! The last time Louis asked his fans how they were holding up was May 18th - the Watermelon Sugar music video release day. Love that he knows which days are gonna be busy for us!

AND!! Louis won his artist of the summer competition!! He was up against BTS, which was going to be his toughest competition, but fear not, louies blew them OUT OF THE WATER! He racked up 26 BILLION points (to BTS’ 5 billion) across social media and 13 MILLION votes total. Louis also thought that was wild, as he popped up on twitter to say how “fucking crazy” these numbers were. He also said he was “missing you all and wishing I was on tour. When it finally comes around it will be even more special”. Honestly, with everything that’s happened this summer, I believe him, and I think that it will be quite a sight to see! What he didn’t do, however, is give a new interview to the radio station running the contest - they just claimed he did by cutting up an old interview that he gave to them last October and making it seem as though he was speaking to the DJ in real time.

Meanwhile, Niall - who told us that he wished he was showing us hit songs - has co-written a very good one! It is up and coming Irish pop singer JC Stewart’s new single, “Break My Heart”, which dropped on Stewart’s instagram live yesterday afternoon. “Wrote this with Niall,” he said, and then proceeded to sing a heartfelt ballad about a toxic relationship, and wanting to get out of it. “If you’re gonna break my heart,” he sang with his whole chest, “then do it right, don’t you leave me hanging on like the last time.” It’s a great song, and I can’t wait to hear it on the radio!

Yesterday, a rumor started circling that Zayn might also have been cast in a movie called “A Hard Knock Life in Detroit”, alongside Zendaya and Eminem. After some more time had passed, it turned out that the movie page had been fan made, and he will not actually be starring in a movie as of now. However, he does seem to have new songs coming! Radio DJs took to twitter to tease a possible release date for his new songs: September 18th, apparently. After the amount of times that DJs have teased new content from the boys this summer without any payoff, I am not convinced, but cautiously optimistic.

Also, Liam seems well on his way Tik Tok fame! He did a Tik Tok duet challenge with a fan and lip synced Teenage Dirtbag. I bet the fan who tagged him in the challenge was not expecting him to do it, but I’m so so glad he did - every time he interacts with his fans, my heart grows two sizes too big.

In other music news, a new (old?), unreleased One Direction song written by Harry was registered in the ASCAP. It’s called “Want You To Be There” and was co-writen by Jake Nathan Gosling (not Ryan Gosling, sad) and Chris Leonard, an old 1D writer. I would say that the odds are that we never hear this one, but then again, “Half The World Away” leaked literally two weeks ago, so never say never!

[wlw-lovestruck-fiction]

May i request vivienne x mc where mc leaves vivienne after a huge fight and doesn’t come back, only to have her find mc not only living in Japan but also finds her figure skating her heart out during after hours because mc’s best friend owns the skating rink facility. Vivienne stays and watches mc skate but when mc sees her, she ignores her because mc is tired of empty promises and dancing around everything that goes on between them. Especially their feelings. Little bit angst but fluffy ending

Warning: Mentions of toxic behavior.

...

“Fair warning, Vivienne, but this is stalker behavior.”

Vivienne swallows, feeling the words curl around her heart like barbed wire. The thing is, after so many wounds, what’s a few more?

So all she does is pause, ignore it and mask it with her trademark smoldering smirk, her expression all teasing confidence.

“Never thought I’d hear that jab from you, Jace. You learn something new every day.”

Jace stares at her with all the judging intensity of a spectator, the kind that knows when the character on screen is going to crash and burn into a hopeless little thing. Vivienne meets their gaze with a defiant one of her own, because she won’t let that happen.

She’s too familiar with the bitter feeling of a mistake. She knows when to stop. What she’s doing right now? It doesn’t feel like that. It’s light with the possibility of a new beginning, raw with the pain of a past confrontation that demands healing. It’d be easy to bury it in her past, adding more to the ever-growing pile, but Vivienne has grown tired of running and escaping and pretending everything is alright behind a fake smile and- and… She simply had to change. For the better.

She needed to face everything. Make it right.

And MC… that’s her biggest regret. And her first priority.

…

She has been to Japan before. The memory feels like it belongs to another lifetime.

The urge to run it’s overwhelming. She sees anything or anyone that reminds her of MC and her body tenses like a cat about to bolt away from visitors, yet she marches on, determined. An hour later she finds herself in front of a skating ring facility, bigger than she had initially assumed it to be.

“I didn’t expect anything else but the very best for you, MC.” Vivienne murmurs, her pace slowing down for the first time ever since she left the apartment the Poppy had in Japan. Doubt began to creep in like a flood, snuffing all the courage she had managed to gather, rooting her in place for a long minute, hesitating.

People were beginning to stare. Well, they were more like brief, curious glances, but Vivienne felt each of them like a prickle in her conscience.

She could turn back. MC wasn’t expecting her. No one would know about this other than Jace and-

No. No, no. No.

If she went back to the Poppy’s apartment without at least a brief conversation with MC, everything would have been for naught. The failure would otherwise crush her. She needed to face this. Otherwise, had she even changed at all?

She took a deep breath, trying to piece her courage back together. Slowly, she made her way in.

…

MC didn’t have a talent for ice skating, but her passion more than made up for it. She glided along the ice, effortless, easing into a slow spin along the ring, as if she was taking in the view of everyone skating alongside her. Vivienne hadn’t been here for more than a second and she was already mesmerized.

Her body is graceful and relaxed as she goes, completely in her element. From this distance, her expression is nothing but a fleeting mystery – the seductress gets the sudden urge to chase after her ethereal figure, to marvel intensely that someone this perfect exists. Vivienne had seen MC on many situations before, but nothing quite like this. She looks so free, her movements light like a leaf caught in the wind, and the light falls on her in such a way that she might as well be glowing.

Her happiness shines through, and a slow, loving smile settles on Vivienne’s lips before she can even register it. Her hands grasp the edge of the ring and the cold sensation startles her out of her reverie, not sure when she had come so close, but basking in it.

This is the effect MC had on her. She had missed it.

Caught in the warmth of her melancholy, what she sees next hits much harder. One glance up reveals the full-splendor of MC’s face, less than a meter from where Vivienne is standing. She is there one second and gone in a blink, speeding to the other side of the ring, but it was enough time to burn her expression into Vivienne’s mind: a full-blown scowl, barely softened by the sheer surprise of a memory long forgotten, buried deep into the ice. There’s a clarity in her eyes that stuns Vivienne and steals her courage away, and they speak clearly a decision from long ago: MC doesn’t want anything to do with Vivienne anymore.

The urge sparks again and Vivienne throws herself forward, not caring one bit about the stares she receives. She circles the ring in record time, intent on following MC who is already heading for the exit, her pace surprisingly brisk despite the skates she is still wearing.

“MC!” No response, save for MC’s hands curling into fists. “MC, please wait!”

Still, MC does have some distance advantage. It’s all she needs to get to a room and shut the door in Vivienne’s face just as she catches up. It’s one of the rooms not open for the public, she distractedly realizes, only for staff. There will be no pressure for MC to open the door, though. She only needs a few minutes and a call for security to escort Vivienne out, but like hell Vivienne is going to let that happen without saying her piece.

“I’ll leave you alone after this, I promise.” Vivienne says against the door, raising her voice just enough to be heard over it. “Nothing empty about it, I assure you. I— I’ve had… some time to think. I’m sure you’ll be glad to know the rest of the Poppy gave me plenty of lectures and no rest whatsoever… Zoe most of all. And I deserved it, because I didn’t… I didn’t really take the time to notice how you were feeling. I just wanted to protect myself, and that was too selfish from me. It’s true I was scared to enter a relationship, but I had no right to act the way I did, to… to try and manip—”

“Leave, Vivienne.”

The seductress took a sharp intake of breath, wishing she had all the time in the world to make this right. “Hear me out.”

“I’m friends with the owner, you know. Security would come in a second.”

Despite her suspicions getting confirmed Vivienne can’t help but smile, moving one hand to press it flat against the door and lean there. “Don’t go all Karen on me now, MC. Just give me five minutes.”

“I won’t listen to anything you say. I know better than to believe in your words.”

“I’ll say it again: there will be no more empty promises between you and me.”

MC snorts, on the other side of the door. Vivienne wants to imagine she’s also leaning against it, arms crossed, defiant. There’s a beat of silence which makes her heart swell, and at the next second she’s back to tumbling over her words, almost desperate.

“It didn’t realize it as soon as you left. I—I thought I was safe. That no one could hurt me now because I had driven them off, again, but then I began to feel like I had lost a crucial part of myself. I didn’t realize how much those nights we spent together talking meant. I didn’t realize that at some point I had begun to… to feel safe, and accepted, I just kept my guard up and manipulating you so you wouldn’t get any closer. Not once did I stop to think about you, and the way I dismissed your feelings, even when you tried to talk to me—”

“Please, leave. I don’t want to deal with this.”

“MC…”

“Today was supposed to be fun.”

“MC.”

“It’s just— you can’t honestly expect me to believe this. That you’ve changed. It’s only been, what, three months? There’s no possible way—”

“There is.” Her hand falls to the handle, the other automatically moving to search for a pin to pick the lock, but she freezes mid action and forces herself to keep them still against her sides. The one who must open the door is MC, voluntarily. “I was just made aware of your side of the story. It took some time for me to fully process it, admittedly, but once I did—”

“Yeah, sure. Real convenient you didn’t process it sooner.”

“Once I did, I realized how manipulative and… and, frankly, toxic I had been. No one deserves to be treated that way by their partner—”

“Funny, I don’t remember you saying we were in a relationship back then.”

“To be honest, relationships are… tools, for me. It’s my job in the Poppy. My biggest mistake was operating like you were a mark, when you obviously weren’t.”

“You’re sounding like a real knight in shining armor.”

“I’m… merely admitting my faults. I was stupid.”

“The biggest moron to have ever lived.”

Vivienne blinks at that, letting her head drop against the door with a dull ‘thud’. “I can’t deny that. It’s the truth.”

“Right… well, I’m glad your toxic behavior is out in the open now. I… I was warned, in the beginning. Nikolai and Remy told me how used you are to running away. That as a thief you were amazing but as a romantic partner you were a mess. I didn’t listen. I thought I could get through you.”

“And you did, I just…”

“Yes, yes, you realized it too late. And after the whole Poppy yelled at you, probably.”

“…you aren’t wrong.”

“You said what you wanted. Can you leave now?”

Vivienne hesitates, torn. “I feel like there’s more to say.”

“Frankly, I don’t care about you or whatever you feel right now.”

“May I come another day, then?”

“Are you seriously asking that after—? No, no, I don’t want to see you anymore. I left for a reason, you know.”

“I’m well aware. I just want to show you that I have changed.”

“And what, do you expect a medal? Just go.”

Vivienne doesn’t. She grips the handle tight, trying to let it anchor her. “Please…”

There’s another pause. MC’s voice is softer, quieter when she continues. Vivienne almost has to strain her ears to listen. “You always avoided any important subject I wanted to talk about. You always danced around my feelings. No, you looked for specific actions or feelings to take advantage of them. I don’t want to go through that anymore. Whatever we had is over. Leave.”

“I didn’t come here trying to start dating again.”

“As if we ever were before.”

“The fact is you did get through me. You were one of the few people I ever felt safe around. I’ve already accepted I destroyed any chance I ever had with you… I just want to part on good terms. I can’t stand the thought that I hurt you.”

“I’m calling security.”

Gritting her teeth, Vivienne takes a few steps back from the door. “I understand. I respect your decision, MC. I’m… glad we could talk. Goodbye.”

…

The universe has a twisted sense of humor, sometimes.

She’s seating alone in front a café, reading a book Remy had recommended to her long ago, trying to look for a distraction. Her mind won’t stop replaying the conversation she had had with MC almost a week ago, and the memory only makes her soul twist in agony and regret and a little bit of frustration. Not for the first time, she finds herself wishing to go back in time and slap her past self across the face, for hurting a wonderful woman such as MC.

“I’m a mess,” she muses, staring at the book in her hands without really reading it. “A complete mess. I never do things right when it comes to these types of situations…”

Dean flashes briefly across her mind and she scowls.

“I swore not to play with my loved one’s feelings like you did, and yet here I am.”

The chair next to her scrapes, as if someone had suddenly dragged it out. The sound makes Vivienne go tense, one hand already preparing to poison whoever had managed to surprise her. That shouldn’t happen. She’s normally hyperaware of everything that happens around her, as any thief would be.

Just how distracted is she?

“Careful there.”

Vivienne blinks, startled, pressing her back against her chair like a caged animal. “MC?” She breathes, wondering if she’s hallucinating.

“Yeah. Hey.”

“What… what are you doing here?”

MC presses her lips together. Vivienne’s eyes are immediately drawn towards the action, and then she forces herself to meet MC’s eyes, intent on not making this awkward.

“I mean—”

“Jett called me.”

“What?”

“He explained things further. It’s not enough to make me want to mend our…” She cuts herself off, looking away for a moment, but Vivienne catches how her lips had stretched around the ‘r’, and her heart beats with abrupt panic when she realizes MC had been about to say ‘relationship’. “Not enough to make me want to return to the Poppy.”

“But it’s enough to make you want to hear me out?”

“I want you to listen to me.”

“Ah. Of course. Go on.”

MC’s eyes are like volcanos waiting to erupt, two intense pools of chocolate that Vivienne can’t help but drown herself in. “You said you wanted us to part on good terms. I don’t think that’s entirely possible, but having this conversation will help us both. You said it yourself – you manipulated me to ‘protect’ yourself, because you were scared. You made empty promises, like you would if I had been a mark. I was interested in you because you were a mystery. You presented yourself like this very experienced, seductive young woman, but I knew there had to be more. I never really got past your shell, mostly because you were toxic, but also because I didn’t want to force you to tell me what was going on.”

That was true. MC had always been respectful, skidding around subjects that seemed to bother Vivienne. She was ready to talk if Vivienne was ready, on those few sleepless nights. At the time, Vivienne had thought that it was because she had MC perfectly in her control when in truth MC had let her, because she trusted her.

And she had fucked things up, as usual.

“You say that you understand how much you hurt me, I say you don’t grasp it entirely. You wouldn’t have come here otherwise.”

“I’m tired of running away.”

“Anyone would be.”

“But it was because I was tired that I decided to come here. I wanted to set things right, even if it meant we’d go our separate ways later.”

“I’m glad you at least acknowledge how bad you were, even if it took something like this.”

“You helped me change for the better.”

MC hums, skeptical. “I hope your… next relationship has more truthful communication in it.”

“I’ll try to apply that to all my relationships, romantic or not. Well, so long as it doesn’t interfere with my job…”

The only two people Vivienne felt she could have been with were out of her grasp, anyway, one dead and one so deeply hurt she wanted nothing else to do with her. There was no point in pursing a romantic relationship anymore.

“I’ve noticed you guys haven’t done any heists lately.”

“We’ve been laying low. Mainly it was so the others had more time to tell me off, which I appreciate. And… what about you? Are you doing better?”

“A lot. Ice skating is very therapeutic once you get the hang of it.” She smiles, then, something small and easy to miss. Vivienne treasures the sight. “My friends have helped, too. I’m not hurting, anymore.”

“I’m glad.”

MC nods, silent.

“Thank you for approaching me, MC.��

“Thank you for letting me go. We won’t meet again.”

The words sting, but Vivienne doesn’t feel like she’s crashed and burnt. She feels free, for the first time in ages.

“Goodbye, MC.”

“Bye.”

[j00nbug]

Yandere! Bts Reaction hyung line

: you have sex with another man, while knowing that their in love with you.

Warning: crying,fights,guns, sexual content, fem reader

This is such a mess ong and this has been in my drafts forever so gotta get in out.sorry if there are misspelleds



He would be heartbroken, a mess. How could you do this, had he not done enough to prove to you that he was in love with you?

The relationship was still unofficial but he told you, the girl he had been in love with since the seventh grade, the girl he had givin his sacrid virginity to, was having sex with another man.

No, this couldn’t be true. You loved him back right? You had said that you loved him, maybe it was in the moment. No, no, no.

This was just a rumor. Created by someone jealous. They were just jealous that you were so, so gorgeous.

Though when he saw you making out with Kim Namjoon, the kid that won everything and was also the student council president, behind the bleachers on Tuesday he marched over and beat Namjoon to a bloody pulp.

You had tried to to stop him, but you know that never works.

“You lied!”Jim yelled “You told me you loved me!” You took a step back “It was in the moment Jin- “Don’t ‘Jin’ me you cant just tell someone that Y/N! I love you and you know it, stop playing with my feelings!” He cried as he took another step towards you. With his face red and his blurry Jin pushed you up on the concrete wall. “You stupid whore, it’s all your fault. I can't believe I still love you!” He spoke as he unbuckled his belt.

When yoongi was young he had dreams of loving someone, some like you. He was a bird with broken wings without your presence, he was a mere person that had your time, and he felt like a king, your king.

Though, it all had come to a bloody ending when his dark eyes roamed your body.

Another laying back on your queen sized bed, that he had gotten you. Yoongis face dropped, and so did the flowers he was carrying.

"I knew this would happen." He muttered, "So I came prepared," his hand suddenly pulled a long black gun. His face still dark as he circled the bed, with that foolish man underneath you.

When he stoped, he pointed the gun to the man underneath you. And then came a scream of pain. And blood on his face.

Your relationship with the man was quite odd to you.

You loved Hobi, with your whole heart of course.

Though, his love was more of "I will kill anyone that looks at you but I only care about my dog" you know? Everyone knows, do you see the way he looks at that God damn dog??

He loved you, but in a way that you or no one would want.

So YOU GOT FUCKED!!

By a guy named Jackson, he was sweet and a big flirt. How could you, y/n, not go for someone so amazing?

Hobi never made anything official so it was ok, right?

No, no, no.

Y/n honey, honestly?

Again with your favourite narrator telling you, stop being stupid.

Hobi was a greedy man, with the things he owns especially.

He owns you.

So naturally, he put a tracker on you. He would always be able to see you, save you, love you.

He was stuck in your heart shaped box, Hobi was yours and you would be his, forever.

"Shut the fuck up bitch!" He said as he pointed at Jackson with his gun.

Hobi had greeted you both in the morning after point and greeted you with his new toy.

"Y/n, get up and put your clothes on," he sneered, once you pulled on your now sweaty feeling clothes you grabbed Hobis muscled arm "hobi, baby lets go home please!" You cried, "This is your doing babe!" He pulled the trigger. Jackson bleeding on the newly washed sheets.

All the memories you had with namjoon were happy and full of walks in the park, looking for tiny animals to save. They were good memories, but now the resentment you had for namjoon was something that could be considered an enlightening experience.

He had killed your boyfriend, Johnny, why?

You know why.

The way namjoon loved you was toxic and unhealthy. He new that.

You and namjoon had been friends for years, but sometimes he was off, the way he acted when you were both near your male friends.

He was creepy

It's a shame that you never saw how he was.

He was keeping you in his apartment, after he killed Johnny.

You knew namjoon was in love with you but, the little girl in you wanted to believe that namjoon was a good guy. A friend from preschool. The little boy that would show you bugs and loved to listen to English rap. Not that he could understand the words until he was a bit older.

He had walked in on you and Johnny having sex, it was natural for him not to nock. He was your best friend.

Then The way the tears over flowed in namjoon eyes onto his tan skin was pretty. You had been successful in hurting Kim namjoons feelings, breaking his heart even.

Remember y/n, don't break something you can't fix.

[beauvibaby]

show you how to be loved - j.benn

requested: [x] yes [] no (you guys asked for him)

a/n: I’ve never written for Jamie Benn, I am absolutely so nervous about this. I have zero clue as to why but the idea hit me, so here it is.

Warnings: toxic relationship, some heavy cursing in the beginning

“You’re fucking serious right now?” Your boyfriend, soon to be ex, shouted at you, watching as you shoved as many of your clothes as you could into a duffel bag. “Of course I’m serious! You came home with a hickey, that I definitely did not put there! I’m done, I can’t,” you paused, taking a shaky breath as you zipped up the bag, “I can’t let you treat me like this anymore, you’ve made me truly believe I was the bad one in this relationship, I lost my friends for you.” You couldn’t speak any longer as a sob tore through you, and had he been anywhere near decent he would have at least apologized but all he did was grab your wrist as you walked out, yanking you to face him one last time. “I never want to see you again, you were only good for a quick fuck.” He hissed, you always told yourself not to believe him, but his words were burned into your brain as you stormed out of the house, your fingers working quick on your phone before you could think otherwise.

You slammed your car door shut as you put in the address you hadn’t been to in so long, too long. You knew how to get there like the back of your hand, but with your emotions running high, you wanted the reassurance from the gps on your phone. Please, let him be there, please.

Rounding the corner onto his street you suddenly felt like an idiot, your stomach twisting in a knot, you hadn’t seen him in months, barely spoken to him in weeks, because your ex didn’t like him. “It’s weird, you're twenty five, he’s thirty one, why does he hang out around you?” The words rang through your head, over and over as you sat parked in front of his house, the lights were on, he was there, and then another worry hit you. What if he wasn’t alone, what if he had a girl there? The thought made you let out another cry, your eyes still red and puffy from the cries you had let out on the way here. You pushed everything aside, you’ve known Jamie for years, he’d been a family friend, and then when you moved to Dallas, you reconnected, it was nice. “Fuck it.” You whispered, swinging the car door open, you rubbed your sweaty palms on your leggings as you approached the front door. Your hand lifted to the doorbell, hovering for a moment, finally you pushed it, hearing the noise ring through the house. You paced on the front steps, had you just made a huge mistake? He probably didn’t even want to see you. “Y/N?” Jamie questioned, opening the door slowly. “What are you doing here?” He asked, stepping out closer to you, he watched with furrowed brows as you turned to face him, the porch light showing the tears scattered on your cheeks. “Hey, hey, what happened?” He took two big steps to you, grabbing you carefully by the shoulders, looking you over for any physical injuries. “He-he-uhm, we broke up.” You squeaked out, shamefully, “I don’t know why I came here, I’m sorry, I’ll go.” You rushed, feeling your cheeks heat up. “No, you’re staying, I’m not letting you drive like this.” He demanded softly, pulling you in for a hug. You hesitated, like you had been conditioned, not to hug any guys that weren’t related to you, Jamie didn’t say anything, he released you, guiding you into the house. When you entered the house, you quickly wiped at your face while he turned to shut the door. “Y/N,” he gasped, you looked up at him in confusion but that turned to a frown when his fingers delicately grabbed your wrist, slightly discolored marks there from the grip your ex had taken on it. “Did he do this?” Jamie asked, his tone hard but his eyes soft, you bit your lip as you looked up at him, your eyes telling him everything he needed to know. You reached your hand up to play with your necklace, something you always did when you were nervous, panic ran through you, it wasn’t there, it wasn’t-oh god, you forgot to put it on after your shower, and now you left it there. “What’s wrong?” Jamie asked, eyes looking down to your hand running over the base of your neck. “My necklace, my grandma’s necklace, I left it there, I need to go get it, I-” “Hey, calm down.” He cut you off, grabbing your hands, only then did you realize how close you were. “I’ll go get it, you’re not going to be back there with him.” He started rubbing circles into your hands as he spoke, “Jamie.” You sighed, shaking your head, that was a disaster waiting to happen. “No. Y/N, I’m not letting you go back there with him, just tell me where it is, and I’ll go get it. Let me do this.” He left no room for negotiation. “It’s in the purple jewelry box, the second drawer in the bathroom.” You whispered, pulling your hands from his, he hesitated for a moment, hands cupping your cheeks as he left a short kiss on your forehead. You ignored the way it made your heart flutter, “thank you.” You whispered as he grabbed his keys, “I’ll be back soon, just make yourself at home.” He spoke quickly, disappearing out the door before you could say anything else.

You jumped up when you heard the door open, you had fallen asleep on the couch, the TV playing softly in the background. “Jamie?” You called, his head popped around the corner, “I thought you were sleeping.” He mumbled sheepishly, walking around the corner, your eyes scanned over him, landing on the bag in his hand, and also spotting the jewelry box. “I got the rest of your things, he was trying to throw them out.” Jamie rolled his eyes, but you didn’t miss the small wince from his action, you stood up, making your way over to him, “Jamie.” You sighed, gasping softly when you saw a small cut on the top of his cheek. That was most definitely not there when he left. “I’m sorry.” You added, running your fingers just underneath the mark. “It’s fine, it’s nothing compared to what I’m used to.” He assured you, both of you staring at each other. “You can stay, as long as you need, I have some away games coming up, you could think of it as house sitting.” He eased your nerves, you didn’t want to impose, and he knew that. Even though you could never impose on him, but you didn’t know that.

***

That was two months ago, and you were still here, but it was different, the two of you had gotten closer than ever, but still nothing had happened, you could tell it was there, for both of you, but both of you were too scared to make a move. You skimmed over the comments on your instagram post, cringing at the level of people making snide comments about your looks, you were sandwiched in between Jamie and Tyler in the photo, the three of you with wide, slightly drunk smiles. It was a great night, you’d gotten close to a lot of Jamie’s friends, and their significant others, Jamie brought you along everywhere, and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t like it, any time you got to spend with Jamie, made your heart skip a beat. Yet, all because of people you didn’t know, pointing out all the little things, just like your ex had done, it made you fall back into that self doubt. “Y/N, did you want to watch-oh shit, sorry.” Jamie spun on his heels, hand shooting to his eyes, you rushed to grab your pajamas, you were about to change but the comments made you stand in front of the mirror, nitpicking yourself. The way your stomach stuck out just a bit more than most, the way your thighs rubbed together, the slight roundess in your cheeks, it never used to bother you, but now it was all you could think about. “I’m dressed.” you whispered, smoothing the shirt over your body, shorts covered your hips. He turned back to face you, seeing the way you shifted uncomfortably, he didn’t say anything about it. “I was coming to ask if you wanted to watch a movie?” He spoke, rubbing the back of his neck, attempting to hide the way his face blushed as he looked at you. “Yeah, sure.” You whispered, walking past him, and towards the living room.

You were watching the screen but yet you were oblivious to what was happening, Jamie was chuckling every once in a while, forcing his mind to take in the movie. “Seriously, what is so interesting on your phone?” He sighed, not even bothering to pause the movie as he tried to peek at your phone, you locked it instantly. “Nothing.” You grumbled, shooting him a glare, that he definitely didn’t deserve. “It’s bothering you whatever it is, why don’t you talk to me.” He questioned, sliding closer to you, he watched you unlock your phone, handing it to him on your instagram comments. You sheepishly looked away, biting the tip of your thumb to distract yourself. Jamie sat forward, elbows resting on his knees as he read the comments.

Shouldn’t wear a crop top with a pudgy stomach

Trying a little too hard

She must be a good hookup if they’re hanging with her

Those being the most popular options. “Y/N-” ��What? It’s true, I look terrible in that picture, I shouldn’t be spending so much time with you anyways, you need to be doing whatever you want, not lugging me around.” You ranted, eyes flickering between his and your phone, you took the phone back and hit a few buttons, deleting the picture as Jamie protested all your words. “Please don’t say that about yourself. Please don’t believe that. You’re so much more than that. You’re so… god, you’re so amazing.” He spoke so softly, you almost didn’t hear him. He moved to be kneeling before you, “what?” Your eyes went wide, looking him over, he placed his hands on your thighs, he closed his eyes for a moment, “you’re amazing, those people are just jealous.” He spoke a little louder, your lips curling up softly. “What?” You asked again, not believing him. “You’re serious?” You added, watching as he went wide eyed, “of course, I’m serious.” He answered instantly. “You deserve the world, and then some, I was so blind to never realize how much you meant to me until now. God, when I saw you outside my house, crying, that night, it killed me. The fact that anyone could make you feel that unloved, it’s so messed up.” He looked up at you with those eyes, those damn eyes that showed every emotion. “But I’m-” “What? There’s nothing about you that would make me want you any less.” He cut you off, you shook your head, playing with the necklace around your neck. “Jamie, I think this,” you motioned between him and you, “this is more serious for me than it is for you, I don’t think I can do this, I’m not the girl you see me as, I’m insecure, and broken, and I don’t know how to feel loved.” You whispered, letting your eyes shut as a tear slipped out, “I mean for god sakes, you just walked in on me shaming myself in a mirror, you don’t need to put up with that, it’s embarrassing.” You snapped, not daring to look at him as he stayed silent.

He reached up, gently using your chin to turn your face towards him. “It’s not putting up with that, it’s showing you how you should’ve been treated all along, you’re beautiful, and the fact that you don’t see it, is just mind blowing. I want to be here for you when you feel like that, I want to be the shoulder you cry on, I want to be the guy who’s showing you how to be loved.” He explained, moving closer as he spoke, “let me be that guy, please, Y/N. I love you.” He was all but touching your lips with his, you nodded, closing the gap. You were so utterly in love with the man in front of you for so long, that you didn’t even realize what you were missing out on. “I love you too, Jamie.” His grin showed throughout his whole face, his eyes lighting up as he stared at you. “We have to take it slow, please.” You mumbled, he agreed in an instant. “Whatever you need.” He pulled you in for another kiss before climbing back up onto the couch, except this time, you leaned against him, feeling your worries melt away. So this is what it’s like to be loved.

taglist: @softstarkey​ @mtkachuk​ @thathockeygirl​ @literarycharleton​ @wtfkie​

[crazy-loca-blog]

Personal thoughts on Open Heart Second Year, Chapter 20

Note: As the title says, these are just personal opinions on Choices books and chapters. Of course, you may agree or disagree with them, I only use this platform to express my thoughts on what I read every week and what I’d like to see in the next chapters, because none of my friends play Choices so I have no one to comment the books with.

That’s a wrap! I can’t believe Book 2 is over. And just like everyone, I didn’t know how I felt about the final chapter of the book… until I started writing this… and I had a realization just as our MC did (of course, this led me to write this post from scratch like three times!). You know… it wasn’t brilliant, but it wasn’t a bad ending… I’d say it was pretty correct… and maybe even better than we think it was. Let me show you why:

At the very beginning, I had this kind of bittersweet feeling, just like everyone else. But then I replayed the chapter a few times to try different options and routes, and I started noticing that the writers made some amazing job paying attention to many of the little details we got to see throughout the book and finding a way to put them all into the final chapter. Everything was a lesson, everything made sense and everything almost everything got a closure… and that’s just some awesome writing, guys. Trust me, I had a long list of complaints, but by now, my only complaint is that the chapter was way too short.

Let’s begin with the main issue of this chapter: Leland Bloom and the check. I had the same question as the MC for a whole week. Why would the man give a billion dollar check to a second year resident? And with the sneak peek it kind of hit me: Leland not only was trying to buy Edenbrook, he was also trying to buy us… because for him, it’s always about money. I could even see our MC going through the same dilemma that Jackie faced with Panacea. And I have this gut feeling that what we decided to do with the check may have an impact in Book 3.

To be honest, at first I didn’t pay much attention to the scenes with Sienna, Aurora and Elijah. Even though I have to admit I missed Kyra on this set of dialogs, I was glad to see that the writers gave us some time alone with them and I loved how different their answers were. However, I saw them as some kind of filler content… like “oh, we need to add an extra conversation with our friends because it’s the final chapter”.

The same applies to our LIs. At first, I didn’t know if asking our LIs for advice was a good idea unless you’re romancing Ethan (based on the fact that he’s also our mentor and the only person who knows Leland Bloom as much as we do). I would have even added Naveen and Harper to this set of dialogs, as this was more a professional thing than a personal issue and they would have surely given our MC a great piece of advice (especially Naveen!).

But then, it hit me. This wasn’t just a set of random conversations. Instead, the writers made an amazing job mixing the storylines of every one of our friends and LIs with the conversation about the check and Leland Bloom, and that led to different realizations based on who you chose to talk to. That was simply brilliant and it reminded me why I love this series so much… nothing on these books is written at random. Everything has a purpose and sooner or later, it always clicks.

Based on the same premise, can we talk about how our story with Esme seemed to be coming full circle? No matter how your relationship with her ended (at least not yet), we finished our story with her right where we started: healing her wounds. However, there is something that is kind of bothering me. During our conversation, Esme told us that Leland had reached an agreement with Levi’s family, so the lawsuit wasn’t a problem anymore. And here we go again. We know that Leland isn’t the type of person who does things just to help people… and now I can’t help wondering if he may have found a new ally in Esme. Will she keep the secondary role she got in Book 2 or will she become a more important character in Book 3?

Another cycle that was closed during this chapter was Kyra’s. I’m so glad that she was finally declared cancer-free (can we just stop for a moment and give Bryce the credit he deserves for this? PB didn’t do it, so we should!), but it kind of shocked me to see her go and realize we won’t be seeing her in Book 3, especially because she is part of our gang now. Her departure really got me wondering if this is PB’s way to prepare us for the final goodbye in Book 3. I’m also wondering what the writers have planned for Rafael. After all he went through, I’d really like to see him back in Edenbrook… but not as a paramedic. I know he said he wouldn’t go back to hospital life, but after all the physical therapy he got, I think this would actually be a great job for him. He loves to help people (and that’s something he won’t get rid of easily because it’s his nature), he loves exercising and, at the same time, he needs to calm down and take life slowly. I don’t know about you guys, but after all the complaints to have him back, and now that he’s finally fine, I need to have him around!

As per the romance with our LIs, please don’t laugh at me, but I think PB decided to ground us all. For a whole book this fandom has been so focused on “fighting” over LIs, that I can imagine the OH writers saying something like “You know what? Enough! Let’s remind them who is in charge of the narrative here!”… and that’s how they fooled us all.

However, if you’re romancing Bryce, Ethan or Rafael (sorry Jackie stans, maybe it’s because of the path I read, but I don’t feel the same about that relationship), they certainly gave us all those “we’re in a real relationship” vibes at the party… and at the private party as well. By now, I think there are some things that go without saying, and even though we’re probably not getting the content we thought we would have, things look very official to me. Sometimes you just don’t need words, you need actions, and those three guys have shown our MC all their love through them. Every piece of advice, every conversation, every small detail, even in the sex scenes you may see there has been an evolution… and I’m not talking about how kinky things became, but about what’s behind it… you can definitely see two people who trust each other, who feel confident about what they have, and who look like people in love. But of course, they won’t say those three words yet. I’ve always felt like PB is very respectful of the timing (not only in OH, but in their books in general), so I wouldn’t imagine them saying “ILY” right now, especially because after all the ups and downs of the plot, things are just starting to take their final shape for Book 3. But if I go back to the final 30 diamond scenes in Book 1 and compare them to the ones we got in Book 2, Chapter 20, you can safely say the relationships with all three male LIs are at a whole new level now.

Finally, one of the things that worried us the most was the insane amount of subplots this book had. Did they manage to give closure to all of them? Let’s see:

Aurora Emery: For a whole book, Aurora felt like she was “the lesser Emery”. We went back to college with her and we got to know about her struggles to make friends. Finally, she found her own closure in Chapter 17, after having an amazing heart to heart conversation with her aunt. So yes, her subplot did have a closure.

Sienna Trinh: Our sweetheart spent two whole books involved in toxic relationships: first, with her boyfriend, and then, with Mitch, her intern. Even though she only recognized the toxicity of her second relationship, I’m glad that she’s finding peace after losing Danny and I’m hoping for her to have an awesome Book 3 just because she deserves it. But yes, her subplot did have a closure.

Elijah Greene: Our boy was the first character who made it safe to Book 3. He had some issues when trying to keep boundaries with Sothy, his intern, and it seems our choice to help him or not, actually had an impact on the relationship between them both and in Sothy’s performance as an intern. So yes, his subplot definitely did have a closure.

Jackie Varma: Her conflict with Panacea was fully addressed in the Vegas chapter. However, we still don’t know if having her name in the list of doctors who received money will have some long-term effect. Will this be a topic they’ll rekindle in Book 3? I have a gut feeling that this might be one of the subplots that was carried to Book 3. So no, I’d say her subplot didn’t have a closure.

Bryce Lahela: The Lahela siblings subplot was one of my favorites of Book 2. Keiki is an awesome teenager, and seeing Bryce growing so much as a character was a delight and it made me really proud. He sacrificed everything for his sister, to the point he even swallowed his pride and talked to his parents to ask for help. So I’m glad to say that yes, this subplot had its happy ending and found its proper closure.

Rafael Aveiro: Book 2 was a such a self-discovery journey for Rafael. As I said last week, I think he was a mess the whole book, and I don’t think this had to do with the writing, but actually with the fact that, before the incident, he was questioning his life and everything he loved (even his feelings for our MC). The incident not only was a “rebirth” for him, it gave him a whole new perspective on life and it challenged him through his recovery process. Did he find closure? I don’t think so. Only the incident had a closure, his existential problems still have a long way to go.

Ethan Ramsey: Ethan had two face not only one, but two conflicts. The first one was personal: not only his mom returned after abandoning him 25 years ago… he had to deal with the fact that she was an addict. So even though it seems like everything was solved after he left her at the rehab center, I don’t think this is the last time we’ll see Louise, as there are some things that were left like hanging (for example, who was she talking on the phone when we first met her?). So… did this subplot have a closure? Probably yes, but I’m not a 100% sure. Then we had his professional conflict: the money problems were never about the money, but about being loyal to Naveen’s mission. Was this solved? Absolutely yes! It only took him a conversation with Naveen to realize that he could carry his mission wherever he goes.

Esme Ortega: Esme probably got the worst part when it comes to subplots. She actually had two of them and I don’t think any of them was properly solved. The first one was the harassment she suffered when we first met her. The “closure” was treating the guy for a serious illness, talking to him and then leaving the incident behind… or diagnosing him with dementia so he had to quit his job? I mean… really? And then we have Levi’s case. Sure, everything was properly solved after Leland Bloom and Levi’s family reached an understanding and avoided the lawsuit… but we’ll never know if she actually did it, won’t we? Where is the “resident-intern” confidentiality we talked about in Chapter 7? Sorry, but this is a HUGE NO for me.

I know there are some things I might be missing now, but I’m actually saving them for a future post. As per Book 3, my bet is that we’ll be having a new release in February, just to keep in line with the releases of the first two books. Will Book 3 be the last one of the series? Honestly… I don’t know. I know the series is supposed to be about our three-year residency, but now I have some doubts. First of all, medical drama is a topic where you can constantly add new content without necessarily repeating the formula. Also, the fact that was mentioned that Bryce’s residency lasts 4 years instead of three is kind of giving me some hope of a fourth book. Finally, let’s face it: Open Heart and The Royal Romance/The Royal Heir are currently the most successful series for PB. And after seven books, it’s time for the TRR gang to take a break. Maybe it’s time for Open Heart to pick up the slack.

Our MC: Even though I don’t think our MC had a plot that needed to find closure, the book certainly left us some uncertainties about their story. And the most important one is the lack of PTSD after the incident. Well… let me tell you that maybe not everything is lost. I was so curious about it that I actually did some research. And guess what? There is something called “delayed-onset PTSD”. This form of PTSD appears at least six months after a traumatic event, and in some cases, it even takes years to appear. However, this does not mean that an affected person has no PTSD symptoms prior to this six months period. This would match exactly with our MC’s behavior after the incident. So now that our friends issues seem to be mostly solved… maybe it’s time for our MC to face their own problems?