#also the people are so nice here wtf
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12.10.23 - thursday, jeudi, torsdag
first actual studyblr post! decided to start off easy and instead of launching myself straight into 100 days, i decided to do the studyblr community challenge instead.
there was a gas leak in our english class today, but i dont know if it was for muck up day or not. i guess we'll never know.
things i did:
all of my french education perfect about foods my maths assignment on frequency tables the geology science investigation based on a prac today in class nearly all my consolidation on the rock cycle the friend quest on duolingo i got that we had three days to do but did it in roughly five hours. teamwork!
things i will try to do tomorrow:
edit my coding assignment and commits finish my rock cycle consolidation do two more norwegian units in duolingo transcribe a chinese poem for homework
(this sounds really sad but i am proud good job me)
day one: introduce yourself and tell us what you study! hi, my name is tay or soulless :> i learn french and norwegian and play video games (badly) in my free time. im still in high school so... literally everything but im most interested in languages, english and science at the moment! (not physics though :sob:)
this is a bit rushed, hopefully tomorrow i can format my posts better
#studyblr#studyblr challenge#langblr#studyblr community challenge#good soup#french#norwegian#my hass teacher called me the supreme yay#also the people are so nice here wtf
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a redraw of the first drawing i posted here to celebrate the fact that ive been in tumblr for more than a whole year posting my shit and havent deleted my blog in panic yippee \:D/ (mushy rant in tags)
#i realised too late that it has been more than a fuking year (august 9)#and for context: ive had 3 different intagram art accounts and i deleted all 3 of them a few months before creating them. anxiety amiright#here it has been so different bc people are so nice??? it has been a pretty plesant experience here w all of u really#im so glad to have found myself in such a wonderful part of the fandom and amazing mutuals that i never talk to bc im shit w texting#the atention has been overwhelming ngl. i have over 2000 followers which. holy fuck???#it doesnt feel like a real number and for my own sake im nnot gonna treat it as one#like i apreciate the support and ppl liking what i do but im not here to make number go big yk? im here to connect w other humans#and yall have been amazing humans ^^ thank u for all the wonderful tags and comments and the support overall#it has been so cool sharing my art and finding other artist whom i respect oh so very much. some of them even follow me back wtf#i hope to continue being here for as long as i can and keep growing as an artist and sharing that process with other without fear#also my amy redesign actually goes so hard idk why i forgot about it nxnfbcncb#sth#sonic fanart#sonic#amy rose#nov.aart#nov.junk
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they are ignoring my big beautiful pathetic himbo wife and his cute little platypus tail that he has for some tank part reason im too dumb to understand why
#how can u laugh 😿 this is not a JOKE 😾⁉️⁉️⁉️#love the way starscream was smiling and entertained by demo's people pleasing and having to make himself frown#so he can make demo even more exasperated by his apathy#'it's funny when he nags cyclonus but he can stfu around me pls '#part of what makes armada starscream so cool is demo taking a lot of the more pathetic sides of his ppl pleasing#starscream's ppl pleasing is more for competitive career (power) reasons and fear#demo's tries to be but also he just wants megatron to like him and be nice to him pls :(#whereas megs actually likes starscream and wants him to succeed one day just not today lol#and starscream is like no wtf ure weird i just want ur position . gtfo#it's like the one worker the manager wants to make a new manager one day but the worker hates it there & just does whats needed then leaves#& trains new ppl by being like 'yea so the fuckass manager likes it like this so if u see him then do that shit but heres how i do it lol'#new ppl being mini cons who hes like that cool younger adult to wholl send ppl home instantly if theyre sick & is chilled but professional#meanwhile demo is the suck up tryhard who just needs to put the fries in the bag bro#he wants to be manager so bad but hes also annoying and dumb and megs just wants him to leave his office so he can pretend 2 work#cyclonus is the broke guy who just goofs off bcs if he gets fired then he gets fired but they havent yet bcs theyre understaffed#n he knows it too. he sleeps on the job if it slows down for 1 second. but hes an adrenalin junkie who can get distracted#demo wants meg to want his effin cookje so freaking bad... i love pathetic men#sideways secretly has 3 jobs total & 2 of them are at their competitors' who pay better so he dgaf abt this one#he never picks up shifts and doesnt care abt working less hours. hes hust here for the drama tbh#he clocks in wondering if demo will ever get that megadck hes been bitching abt#he clocks out a disappointed fujoshi#it's ok bcs karen hot rod who works at their competitors comes storming in with his kids & needs rizzed up#by either starscream or sideways bcs they fucked up his kids' orders on purpose after hr gave them a spiel abt their long list of allergies#demolisher#starscream#cyclonus#transformers#maccadam#tf armada#sideways
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sitting in the parking lot thinking i might vom
#it's a chain place and ive been on the other side of places like this#(i wasnt an interviewer but i was friends with them)#and there at least people would show up late + in sweats for the interview and they'd get it!#they would show up with 'oh yeah interview today almost forgot' and they'd get it!#meanwhile im having a breakdown trying to do everything right and perfect#making sure i look nice but not too nice bc again its a chain fast food place and i cant try Too Hard#also these pants dont have belt loops and they tend to shift#AND my right hand is swollen from the wasp sting yesterday so im worried its gonna be 'wtf is wrong with you'#but also shouldn't it say something that im here anyway even though i could have rescheduled#but then its like... im not gonna kill myself for this place like i did at mcd and does it give that impression?#or should i have rescheduled bc they'll think it's bad decision making to come anyway with my hand swollen#also worried that i should have parked nearby and come over closer to the time bc am i the freak sitting in the parking lot#but at least im early! but am i too early? but im out here not rushing them. but should i be so they know I Am Interested#not to even mention wtf im gonna say to them to explain my employment gap#and im so paranoid that im gonna go in and say im there for an interview and they're gonna be like ???#bc it was through an automatic text/email thing when i applied#which was how my last job happened but idk. maybe im an idiot and it's all fake so they can point and laugh#and i KNOW thats ridiculous. but that's how it feels rn.#also im worried they'll ask if i want something to eat/drink and i dont know the right answer#like i feel like i should say yes bc what do you mean you wont eat here? but the wrong thing means im taking advantage#and how will i be if im actually working there?#and its all so dumb bc#AGAIN people roll out of bed confident and they're fine. meander their way through and theyre fine. theres no reason to think i wont be#but ANXIETY#its gonna be an out of body experience no matter what and later I'll wonder about all the things i dont remember#if i fucked up or not#and now i have to go in bc it's 7 minutes until my time and i want to be a little early but not too much#fuck#wish me luck#ks talks
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The Thing happened!!!
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Facing TERRIBLE choices right now because DnP are coming to a town RIGHT NEAR ME… when I’m not at school. Which I am. BUT it’s absolutely driveable (2.5 hrs!!) and I could stay the night at home, except then I’d have to tell my parents what I’m driving home for and I am simply too embarrassed. What do I DOOO 💀
OH DEAR a conundrum fr (honoured to be your port of call btw.......i have only been in the phandom for a month or so and i am feeling so welcomed). tbh if you don't think your parents will be too weird about it (as in, if it's just a bit embarrassing, rather than something they'll be like. homophobic about) i would just tell them, but you could always just vaguely say "it's a comedy show", or find something else happening in town that day that you're Totally Definitely Going To. or! you could pass it off as a "my friend wants me to go to this thing with them bc they're nervous to go alone, i don't really want to go but i want to support them haha". cuz like......if you can go (you can) and you want to go (you do) then i think it's worth doing!!!! then you can experience their insanity firsthand!!! and you'll probably even meet new pals
#answered#opqrstuv04#if u need a pep talk to be able to tell them lmk and i will you hype you up. i'll do a little cheerleading routine. i'll get confetti#dnp#also again THANK U for the ask.....i love talking to people on here. and the phandom is just so nice wtf
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somehow these current roommates we have are the worst that ive known yet and last semester we literally had a girl who smoked cigs IN her bedroom. list of grievances below lol
#first of all they turn all the lights on all the time. the other day i was hanging out in the living room w one light on bc it was light#enough outside thru the windows and one of them walked in and flipped another light on automatically. then walked through#the living room right to her bedroom... girl youre not even using this room and i was clearly fine with the light level??#they always have all 3 kitchen lights on when they cook and dont turn them off plus none of them have lamps#they all use the Big LED Ceiling Light in their bedrooms which is baffling to us#they dont know how to organize the kitchen and they took up so many of the cabinets with bullshit. like 3 pans here a few plates there#we have like 4 cabinets worth of food and even more of pots and pans and shit bc this is everything we own#and we cant afford to use disposable everything like some of them do#theyre always leaving the fridge open while they cook too and i have to physically hold myself back from becoming my mom#and yelling at them to close the fridge when theyre not actively getting smth out of it!! like theyll stand there cooking and have it open#for 2 minutes straight#theres only room for one water filter pitcher in the fridge and one of them brought a big one which is nice but theyre always forgetting to#refill it which defeats the purpose of even having it#and they always somehow start cooking right when we decide we need to eat#one of them sent this long sort of condescending post abt ants and how it stresses him out when the kitchen is messy so we all need to clean#more and try harder to keep ants away as if 1) ants care at all abt dishes in the sink or stains on the stove and 2) as if the ants will#stop coming around if theres no food out in this building where there are notoriously always ants even on the 4th floor#(we are ground floor this time) and 3) as if he isn't one of the people leaving food around and not taking the trash out#nobody responded to it in the groupchat lmao bc he sounds like a fucking cop!! and is dating an rotc guy??? and also is a streamer or just#likes to play games on vc with friends bc hes always very loudly doing that#but obviously we have sex all the time so we're at a sort of loud noise stalemate where neither of us can complain abt the other#to be clear this is in no way the absolute worst situation theyre nice enough people and havent reported us for anything (they both work for#student housing -_-) and generally things go okay in the apartment#but like. ive never been this annoyed this often with any other roommates#ALSO someone spilled soy sauce all over our designated level of the fridge door where we had all our little bottles of stuff#but also a carton a Paper Carton of milk and a pack of butter standing upright which soaked up the soy sauce and for several days#even after id cleaned the bottom of the carton the best i could i swore it tasted like soy sauce from it soaking into the bottom or smth#but it's still all over everything in there bc it was so much it like. pooled in there and splattered on everything#like. u see that happen u clean it up wtf.??#anyway i just felt like i needed to complain and see if im being silly or if these things really are so annoying
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pov: you work at a company that goes hard during pride month and sooo many coworkers there are celebrating and talking about it and it’s amazing and wonderful…but you can’t join in because these fuckers have your facebook which your parents also have and you don’t know what your coworkers could unintentionally post or comment about you if you do say anything and so you just suffer and be a sad “ally” in silence lmao :/
#umm hi update- I don’t even remember writing this last night wtf#someone take my tumblr away after midnight aaahh#anyway- original tags-#this happened last year too#but I had only worked there a month so far this time last year#now they know me#and like yes I never talk abt dating bc…reasons but they assume i’m straight I think??? idk I don’t like it aaahhh#pride month is so nice here thoughhh#ughhh#but also asexuality has a bad rep at my work location#because of someone who worked there for awhile who was very loudly ace and people didn’t like her and now that resentment still lingers???#it’s weird and sad and I hate it aahhh :(#grace is dramatic
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OH MY GOD I LEAVE FOR LIKE ONE HOUR HOLY SHIT
#YALL ARE SO NICE#THE TAGS ARE MAKING ME TEAR UP FR#PEOPLE ACRUALLY LIKE MY ART THAT MUCH WTF#IT TOOK ME LIKE 45 MINS LIKE ARE U SURE#GOD DAMN#TY UNIVERSE ILY#(AND ALSO ALL U LOVELIES HERE FR U HAVE MY HEART)#rowyn rambles#happy tag
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Reading my own posts like heheh she’s so funny
#self love 💕 🥰✨💕✨#bergi gabble#thank god none of my vent posts appear on my recommended posts#we can’t have people thinking I have feelings#also I’ve been posting so much in Portuguese lately like wtf#15yo me wouldn’t believe#it’s so nice that I found br friends on here <3 beijos meus amores
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#OH BOY. i could NOT do this vtuber streaming shit like my friend#2 days in a row there are these nonsense fucking chatters and i know for a fact theres more when im not looking#like the other day somebody came in cussing abt how they didnt get a response from the company my friend is from after auditioning#and like wtf is your problem? not like my friend is in charge of that and they dont respond right away anyway#I WAS PRETTY MAD SEEING IT ACTUALLY but my friend wasnt mad at all and was patient and explained it#and gave them a kind warning and all that. friend is so much better than i am actually#and ik “its their job!” it is but my friend is naturally that nice actually. which is wild 2 mebc im not mean but im not that patient eithe#and today oh my god somebody came in and was asking a lot of stupid shit abt my friend being “recruited” and if they can get recruited too#or join the project too. first time chatter btw. asking if they can join the shit my friend is talking abt being part of#like? who the fuck are you?#AND ITS FINE TO ASK like oh is this opportunity still available for audition or joining? but they were bombarding my friend w a bunch of#stupid ass questions that look like questioning if my friend even knows what theyre talking about? pissed me off#doing that and then asking if u can get in on the stuff my friend is doing without showing that you can sing too?#oh context is its singing projects. and not my friends btw. my friend got in bc theyve got multiple singing friends and covers up#that people recognize them for. and like i said theyve done live singing competitions and have won voice acting competitions.#they worked hard for what they have and they continue to work hard every single day! on stream and off stream#so to walk in as a first time chatter and bombard my friend with questions like that.#OH MYG DO WAIT the chatter didnt even fucking know what they were asking to join#we said hypmic (RAP ANIME) and my friend said they were doing a cover w ppl. bc thats what theyre doing#and then explained the song is from an anime bc the person was asking whats hypmic. AND THE PERSON SAID anime? i thought u said its a cover#and they brought that energy more than once in a few minutes so im pissed off but my friend literally has the patience of an angel#AND THEN. THE REASON I EVEN STARTED THIS RANT. JUST NOW. SOME NEW FIRST CHATTER CAME IN while my friend was singing (recording on stream)#and I KID YOU NOT THEIR FIRST COMMENT RIGHT AWAY WAS. “wtf did i walk into” AND IS THAT NOT FUCKING RUDE AND STUPID?#THE STREAM IS TITLED RECORDING STREAM BTW. AND THEIR SECOND COMMENT? TELLING MY FRIEND TO WORK ON THEIR HIGH NOTES.#WHICH IS FINE BUT THE LINE MY FRIEND SANG WAS CLEAN? thats not one of the times i wouldve fucking said that? also who are you?#youve been here for like less than half a minute and came in with this stupid fucking attitude. MY FRIEND WAS SO NICE ABOUT THAT TOO#AND LIKE I SAID. KINDA THEIR JOB. THEYRE ALSO JUST THAT NICE ALWAYS.#like im sure my friend can handle it but also what the fuck is wrong w some of u. wheres ur fucking decency when talking to strangers#maybe im just defensive bc ive seen this friend be vulnerable and go through hard times but COME ON. YALL CANT BE DOING THAT SHIT?#maybe im just a hater. idk
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hm.
#idk why hanging out with my school friends always makes me depressed afterwards#bc like. they're objectively nice ppl. and they share a lot of similar experiences with me and are also neurodivergent and queer#it's just that they also seem to have their shit together and are also good at being like. actual people#like they can actually talk to ppl and have a bunch of close friends and have an actual life and i cant help but keep comparing myself to it#like wtf is wrong with me that i just somehow can't seem to click with them or have an actual conversation or just be a person#just. idk. they're objectively nice ppl but i never feel more fucked up than when I've been hanging around them#and i feel like the problem is with me here i just don't know what my problem is#i don't have trouble with this around other ppl or friends so why just here?#idk maybe i should go back to my normal state of not having close friends for school/work#i always feel like im doing something wrong when it comes to school related stuff i hate it here#just. i feel uniquely fucked up for some reason when it comes to school and im not sure why bc ik other ppl there have been where i am#i keep wanting to isolate myself more but i also can't bc i need to network and everything now :/#ughhhhhhh i hate it here. at least i have other friends outside of school tho i don't think i could've done this otherwise#everytime i feel like shit for not being able to connect to ppl here i remember that i still have other ppl i can talk to and connect with#thank fuck for that#mine#vent
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now is a terrible time to lose both of my therapists but here I am…
#genuinely like so sad and scared for many reasons#and no one takes my new insurance#so here I am… with 0 therapists to help me#I don’t need help I guess I’m fine but it would be nice to be able to break down in a controlled setting#also I’m gonna miss them as people like wtf
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being an FA sucks can people just fucking read my FA post
#suffering through yet another tryout#this dude is like 14 at most#based on voice alone#and the way bro has been talking and like constantly dming everyone#ugh#he’s been like so desperately scrambling a bunch of random people together begging for a tryout and already making official team stuff#dude it hasn’t even been 24 hours#I think he’s getting mommed as we speak#he told me he had two other div 4 players who’d be willing to try it out#and it’d be him ‘proving he’s div 4’ because he is not so far#I am not in a lobby with div 4 players#he kept asking me shit and I gave answers he clearly didn’t wanna hear about shit like my weapon pool and what I wanna play#and was like ‘oh damn rip’ but then an hour later came back like HERES HOW I CAN MAKE THIS WORK#dude just give it a rest#find a team your level#and he’s dragged five million people in this server to tryout#dude wtf is this#just slapping a bunch of players together with no regard for what they want#and then basically ignoring them when they say no#he started spam pinging me because he took an earlier scrim than agreed upon so I obviously wasn’t available#I told him like five times I was busy#just#bizarre#immature#I’m trying to be nice but bro is making it so hard#this guy also dmed me two years ago when the rolling squids were looking for a fourth#and was soooo depressed when I showed him our post and he want old enough (we asked for 18+)#so im trying to be nice#he sounded so dejected#but this is a fucking mess
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#will delete later if I remember to just need to yell into the void#why is my art doing so badly on here lately aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa#I thought it was just cause I was drawing for other fandoms and not just shuake#but even my shuake posts are doing so bad compared to how they used to I'm ?????#Like I think my art has gotten better yet it's just getting so little interaction#it is so disheartening like I might as well just stop sharing it idk#I love drawing and wouldn't stop but like if no one even likes it then idk the point in sharing it#and this is just like ugh#self pity but whatever. I want people to like my art enough to actually share it and say something nice about it#also saying this on main instead of my art blog to not guilt anyone ig feel free to ignore this#but it's frustrating#every time I think I'm happy with my art regardless of how well it does my brain likes to remind me that it isn't happy actually#which is so dumb!! cause I DO like my art. I like drawing it! and I like learning things about what I'm drawing too!!#but if something does bad on tumblr then suddenly I don't like it. adhd rsd how I loathe thee#also like my art has been doing better on twitter than tumblr and yet twitter does not offer me the same serotonin as tumblr this is bs#why would 200 notes on tumblr make me happy but I barely care about what I get on twitter as long as it's above 50#and yet it is twitter giving me the 200 notes wtf#it's not even doing bad on twitter why is my brain beating me up on this I swear to god#if anyone read this thanks for caring ig lmao#but fr like can my brain stop being a bitch about this#the twitter people are liking the art even if tumblr isn't really. chill out#anywayyyyy I have shouted into the void now thank you#I think I should stop drawing and play breath of the wild for a while#it would fix me <3
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Imagine that you're Dulcinea, for a hot second here. Because your house is so fucked up you were born with fuckin super cancer. You're going to die before you're 30.
Then you receive a letter stating that the emperor needs lyctors. You have a chance to not die. You obviously take it. But then, some fucking bitch you've never seen before shows up, kills your Cavalier in the blink of an eye, and then starts grilling you about your life.
You know this crazy lady is going to kill you, you know she's going to take your place otherwise she wouldn't be asking all these questions.
So you lie through your fuckin teeth, you tell her the most fanciful bullshit about yourself, you don't even mention your on-again off again penpal lover.
She kills you. You're dead.
Then you... Aren't? You're in a building you've never seen before, surrounded by people you don't know, but they seem to know you. Also Pro is here but you know that he's dead so... Wtf?
But you still go along with it because you're an absolute badass.
Then people are getting murdered, shit gets real, you don't understand, but you're here anyway. And it all feels wrong.
And the wrong is all centered on the angry little goth nunlet. So, naturally, once the mystery is tidied up nicely, you stay behind a little longer than you should to tell her something.
Something important.
Then you fuck off back to the afterlife.
Can I just say? Dulcinea is a total bad bitch queen and I love her? She fooled Cytherea so good. And she's horny for revenge.
Rest easy my love 💖
#dulcinea septimus#justice for dulcie#the locked tomb#the locked tomb series#tlt brainrot#tlt#harrowhark nonagesimus#gideon the ninth#harrow the ninth#tlt spoilers
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