#also she does not use tumblr she never has i just showed her this post like a year ago and she loves it

[8a8y]

my big sister put the playing fraser post on my birthday card

[pathologicalreid]

buried alive | S.R.

in which the BAU races against the clock to rescue you from a killer team

who? spencer reid x fem!BAU!reader

category: angsty

content warnings: kidnapping, case stuff (murder yk), suffocation, being buried alive, hospitals, blood, nausea, CPR, funerals, use of pet names, guns, and drugs. i think that's all.

word count: 2.9k

a/n: okay, so i've been reading so much spencer fanfic and i started writing it and yesterday i realized i have 20 fics written and they're doing no one any good just sitting on my computer. i decided to finally try posting one. i wrote fanfic in high school (so like seven years ago) but this is my first time writing for a TV show. i've also never really posted on tumblr so please bear with me while i try to figure out formatting. tysm for checking out my post.

part two part three

You walked into the conference room and dropped the file on the table, allowing it to land on the wood with a satisfying splat. “The unsub’s burying them alive,” you said, letting the rest of the team know the conclusion you had come to with the medical examiner. “The M.E. found metal shavings and satin threads under the nails of our last victim. The most common materials to make up a casket.”

“There’s no way someone could bury someone alive in a casket alone, we’ve got to be dealing with a team, at least three people,” Emily concluded, standing in front of the evidence board.

It was the team’s third day on a case in Nebraska, four women had been discovered dead. Asphyxiation by hypoxia. Carbon dioxide poisoning.

“Approximately 420 people in the United States die from accidental carbon dioxide poisoning every year,” Spencer said, grabbing the file off of the table and flipping through it, taking a few seconds to read through it.

Rossi looked over Reid’s shoulder to look at the file, “but there’s nothing accidental about these deaths. Who would have access to these caskets?”

You shook your head, placing a hand on the back of Spencer’s chair, “A funeral director seems most likely.” You looked around at the Omaha field office, different agents running about in an attempt to solve these very murders. “They’d have the most access, write it off as displays. It could be hard to match the materials since they’re so common.”

Hotch leaned over the table and pressed the conference phone, “What can I do you for?” Garcia’s bright voice rang through the speaker.

“Garcia, I need you to look into funeral homes within the comfort zone. Look for a director who’s ordered more caskets than they’ve had funerals. Find anything, nothing is too small.” He told her.

“Absolutely, I’ll hit you back when I’ve got something,” she said, hanging up the phone.

There ended up being four funeral homes in the unsub’s comfort zone, so the team split up. You went with two locals to a family-owned business, Garcia had sent you all of the files you’d need on the location. “It looks like the Varn family has been in the funeral business since the seventeenth century,” you read aloud to the two agents you were in the car with.

“Does it mean they’re more or less likely to be the killers if they’ve been in business for so long?” One of the agents asked you, a younger man named Harrison.

You pursed your lips as you continued to look over the files, “I’m not seeing any glaringly obvious stressors before the murders started, but over the years I’ve learned that’s no reason to write someone off. Psychopaths can be tipped off by the slightest thing. Things none of us would bat an eye at.”

Harrison nodded in the passenger seat, looking over to his partner Jimmy, “You and your guy sure do make an interesting pair.”

“I’m going to take that as a compliment, so thank you.” You and Spencer never explicitly stated to the field office that you were dating, but you walked into the precinct this morning holding hands. The agents must have drawn their own conclusions.

The younger officer cleared his throat, “It is a compliment, ma’am. The two of you are very impressive, your whole team is.”

You smiled, “Thank you, Harrison.”

The funeral home was run by a mother and her two sons, you held up your credentials for the mother when you knocked on the door. “Are you Sheila Varn?” You asked her, raising your eyebrows.

“Yes, what’s this about?” She inquired. She didn’t really look the part of a serial killer, a middle-aged woman who was running her family business.

Pocketing your credentials, you spoke, “We’re investigating the recent murders in the area and we were wondering if you had samples of the materials your caskets are made out of. Might we be able to come in?” You asked, adding a charming smile for effect.

Something flashed across her face before she returned your smile, opening the door and welcoming the three of you inside. “Hold on, let me get my boys up here. They’re so much more versed in the goings on of the town than I am,” she said, opening the door and calling for her sons. Felix and Joss came up the stairs from the basement, now they definitely had the physique to load dead women into caskets and bury them alive.

“Why don’t you two men come with me? I’ll get you those samples,” Sheila said, motioning for the agents you were with to follow her. To your horror, they followed her around the corner. “Felix, Joss, show this young lady what you know,” she instructed.

You took a deep breath before you looked up at the two men.

They were tall, maybe Spencer’s height, but they were built like wrestlers. There was no way you could physically subdue them on your own.

You passed out before you even had the chance to pull your gun.

Hotch was in full Unit Chief mode, Spencer watched from the corner of the room as he separated people into groups and gave them specific instructions. JJ and Morgan walked into the precinct, “What’s going on?” JJ asked looking around the room.

“The Varn Family is the team; two agents were found drugged on the side of the road and when we went to the funeral home Y/N was missing. Her badge, gun, and phone were all there, covered in blood,” Spencer said morosely, watching as Hotch finished giving orders and called the rest of the team over.

Your picture was up on the evidence board with the word “missing” written in bold letters beneath it. All of your belongings had been put into evidence for the time being. “Reid?” Hotch said his name, causing his head to snap up. “Are you okay to keep working?”

Spencer nodded affirmatively, “Yes.”

“Good, I need you to estimate how much time we have, I want a clock on these screens,” he ordered.

Morgan turned to Reid, “What do you think she has, kid?”

“The tidal volume for the average adult is point five at rest. That ends up being about six liters per minute. The average casket is approximately 886 liters in total volume and the average volume of the human body is 66 liters, leaving 820 liters to be filled with air for her to breathe. If she’s been gone for half an hour already, I’d estimate she has less than five hours of breathable air left.” Spencer explained, doing all of the math in his head while Emily put a timer on the screen next to the evidence board.

After a moment, Hotch continued, “Rossi, JJ, go back to the funeral home. Tear it apart, there has to be something there we haven’t found yet. The rest of us will split the list of cemeteries in the comfort zone and search them.”

“That’s a lot of ground to cover, we don’t have anything else to go on?” Morgan asked, looking at the list of burial sites he had been handed.

Hotch looked at Spencer, but Spencer stayed silent. “That’s all we have right now,” Hotch responded, “hopefully we’ll come across leads as we go.”

It smelled like a garden around you. The memory reminded you of spring with your mother, tending to the vegetable garden.

The only difference was that instead of the sun beaming down on you, it was pitch black. The space surrounding you was so dark that you weren’t totally sure your eyes were open.

Your head was throbbing just above your right temple, and you observed your surroundings. Slowly, you lifted your arm until it hit a ceiling.

Not a ceiling. A lid. You were in a casket. You pressed one hand to your chest and tried to slow your breathing. Chances were that the casket was already buried beneath the surface of the earth, trying to open it could be catastrophic. You patted the pockets of your jeans, only to find your phone missing, so the team wouldn’t be able to trace the location.

Even if you had it, there likely wouldn’t be service six feet under.

Your team would find you. They had to find you.

They found Spencer, they found Emily, and they would find you.

Spencer shifted in the passenger seat of the SUV, “You know, carbon dioxide poisoning is a rather peaceful way to die.”

“Reid,” Morgan said, turning the vehicle onto the main road, they had just finished scouring over another cemetery with still no sign of you.

He sighed and stared at his hands, “No, it’s good. We see so many people killed in so many different ways that it’s good that she won’t be in pain when she runs out of air.” He tried to convince himself.

Morgan cleared his throat, “We aren’t out of time yet, kid. We can still find her. Y/N’s smart, I’m sure she found a way to make more air or something.”

But they were running out of time, less than an hour remained on the timer set on all of their phones.

They pulled into the next cemetery, “There’s some fresh dirt over there, what are the names on the graves of people who were actually recently buried?”

Spencer starts to recite the names, and the two of them start to comb through the cemetery.

You had done enough research on this case to understand what was going on. The light-headed feeling had started not long ago, but now you felt like you were spinning, despite the knowledge that you were stuck in place.

It was a high. Not unlike the good kids high. Except instead of trying to chase a feeling, you were dying.

The timer went off when they were still scouring graves, shovels in hand. Derek stopped in his tracks, but Spencer kept going.

“Wait,” Spencer called out, reading the name on the card next to the fresh grave he was standing at, he moved to start digging. “Essie Dunbar was a thirty-year-old woman who was mistakenly buried alive in 1915,” he said, digging. “This has to be it.”

Derek called Hotch, putting the call on speakerphone so he could help Spencer dig. “Hotch, we got her, but she’s buried.”

“We’re on our way, Omaha police have one of the brothers in custody,” Hotch told Emily to have an ambulance dispatched.

What Reid knew that Derek didn’t was that it could take four hours to dig a grave by hand. The soil had been overturned, so maybe call it three. Your odds were still negligible. He didn’t stop, he didn’t stop when a caretaker came running at them, and he didn’t stop when Derek told him to get his digging equipment out here now.

Derek flashed his FBI badge to get what they needed. He had to physically pull Spencer back from the grave so the backhoe could dig, only going until there was less than a foot between them and the casket.

Spencer crudely attached a chain to the casket and the caretaker's vehicle. Carefully, the caretaker dragged the white container out of the earth and up a slant they had dug. It was locked shut, “Reid, move,” Derek ordered.

He leaned back and Derek fired at the lock, taking it off and opening the casket. Spencer gasped, there was blood on the side of your head, dried and raked through your hair. He was vaguely aware of Hotch and Emily arriving as they pulled you out of your satin prison. You had no pulse, but you were still warm. Immediately, Spencer started CPR.

“Reid let me do it,” Derek insisted.

What he was trying to say is that he shouldn’t have to be the one to try to save your life.

Morgan repeated himself and Spencer pulled away, allowing the other agent to immediately take over. There was a siren in the background, an ambulance. More people showed up, Spencer heard their voices, but he just kept watching you. CPR was effective if it was done shortly after your heart stopped, and even then, permanent brain damage was likely.

It had been eight minutes since they pulled you out of the ground. Clinically, you were dead for eight minutes before you gasped.

Spencer smoothed your hair back, away from your face, while you desperately tried to catch your breath. You weren’t moving, and Spencer started running through symptoms of hypoxia. His biggest fear was brain damage, that they had done more harm to you in bringing you back than they would have had you died.

The EMTs came running over to where everyone had gathered, dispersing the crowd, and placing an oxygen mask over your face. As they were loading you on the stretcher, you started trying to talk, reaching your arm out to your side. “Wait, what’s she saying?” JJ asked.

“Sometimes it’s hard to talk after CPR,” the male EMT said as they moved you closer to the ambulance. He listened to what you were saying, “It’s not coherent.”

Spencer didn’t move, all of the adrenaline that had been coursing through his body all day was leaving.

Aphasia. They were saying the lack of oxygen to your brain was causing aphasia. “No,” Emily said, realization dawning on her features as she strained to listen to you. You were whispering, rasping the same word over and over again. “She’s saying ‘Spence.’”

He stood quickly and looked at you, sure enough, you were reaching out your hand and whispering, “Spence, Spence.” Your voice no more than a whisper.

Grabbing your hand, Spencer squeezed it, “I’m here,” he answered. “It’s okay, it’s over,” he told you, moving your hair out of your face. Spencer secured your oxygen mask over your face as you tried to take it off, “You have to keep this on, angel.”

To his relief, you squeezed his hand back.

You had been instructed to get some rest, but you couldn’t close your eyes. You asked Spencer to go back to the hotel and change his clothes because he smelled like dirt, and it made you nauseous. Your head had been bandaged, you’d been run through an MRI, and you did an EEG, so far, the only brain damage that had been incurred seemed temporary.

According to the doctors, the nausea and fatigue should wear off, but they hadn’t been able to fully assess if any permanent damage was done. At this point, the worst of your injuries had been caused by being given CPR, resulting in cracked ribs.

Despite your headache, you kept most of the lights on in your hospital room, not quite ready to be left in the darkness again. “Hey,” a voice called from your doorway, Spencer stood, waiting to be invited in. He was wearing different clothes, a button-up with a green cardigan thrown over it, and clean pants. “How are you feeling?”

A nasal cannula slightly restricted your movement, but you were sat up in the hospital bed, “Better than I was, but not perfect.”

He shook his head, walking in and taking a seat next to you, “No one expects you to be perfect right now.” Gently, he reached out and took your hand, skimming the pad of his thumb over your knuckles. “They found the mother and the other son, and all three of them are going to go away for a long time,” he told you, speaking in the kind of hushed, reverent tones that are reserved for hospitals.

You sighed and tilted your head back, “Good,” you maundered. “That’s uh, good,” your voice was barely audible.

“So why do you look so worried?” He asked, leaning in closer to you.

In an attempt to dismiss his concern, you joked, “I think I owe Morgan some sort of life debt now.”

Spencer offered you a soft smile, “The two of you tend to trade those off, I’m sure you’ll find some way to make it up to him.” He inclined his head towards you as if to silently say, So what is it really?

You swallowed thickly, “I’m scared to close my eyes, Spence.”

His shoulders dropped, “oh, Angel,” he breathed. “Is there anything I can do for you?” He asked, looping a loose strand of your hair behind your ear. “Wait, what are you doing?” He asked, watching you as you lifted yourself, so you were on one side of the bed.

Shyly, you patted the new empty half of the bed, inviting him to sit next to you.

He had no choice but to comply, he had the hardest time saying no to you. Leaning the bed back slightly, Spencer kicked off his shoes before he laid down next to you, wrapping an arm around you as you set your cheek on his shoulder.

Your body relaxed into his and you sighed, “Spence?” You murmured.

He pressed a gentle kiss to the crown of your head, “Yes, angel?” He whispered back to you.

“Thanks for coming to save me,” you mumbled, slowly relaxing enough to fall asleep.

Spencer exhaled, “I’m always going to come to save you.”

part two

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

*strolls into tumblr and falls on my face pretending I haven't been missing for like a month I was out getting the milk hello maggots*

Doctor Who But I've Never Watched It 2.0

For those of you feeling deja vu YES I HAVE MADE POSTS ON DOCTOR WHO BEFORE OKAY but back then I was a young uneducated lad, just a fresh blossom unfucked by tumblr. Now I am surrounded by you lot and by god do y'all love Doctor Who. And I am Educated. My DW virginity is deflowered. All that.

SO HERE WE GO, EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS SHOW I'VE NEVER WATCHED:

The show started in 1963, and then was rebooted in 2005 and the showrunner was... Robert de Neiro? Idk all I know is he gives Pedro Pascal vibes. Like his name. His name is Robert.

There have been 15 Doctors so far. One is a lesbian and it is not Jodie Whittaker, it is actually the 12th doctor.

There's someone called the Master. I don't know what that means, or if it's some kind of BDSM thing, but he has intense sexual tension with the Doctor.

He's also emo and has bleached hair and is kinda babygirl. And is called Missy.

The Doctors all have intense trauma and the 15th Doctor kind of girlbossed it by leaving David Tennant intact when they binary-fissioned.

Donna is a person played by Catherine... Tate? Not Hepburn. And she knows less about Doctor Who than I do. And Donna is in a QPR with the David Doctors (there are two of them).

David Doctor loves Donna very much. And then he kills her. But doesn't kill her. And then they have dinner together with her husband and kid.

The original show had shitty effects. The new show does too, and everyone is happy about this.

Rose is someone the David Doctor is in love with and then she ends up with a human AU of him and he leaves and the fans are very divided and passionate about this.

The human AU is called Tentoo because y'all hate using W's. What the fuck is Tentoo. What is Nuwho. Why isn't it New and Two. Help me.

THERE IS SOMETHING CALLED THE TARDIS, IT IS BIGGER ON THE INSIDE, I HAVE HAD WEIRD DREAMS WHERE IT WAS A FUCKING AUTO-RICKSHAW WITH RIBBONS FOR SEATBELTS, AND IT IS BLUE AND NOT YELLOW BUT IT WAS YELLOW IN MY DREAM. Because of a Drarry fanfic that I misread.

The 15th doctor dances homoerotically with someone during the French Revolution.

The 9th doctor kinda vibes with like his head jiggling idk I've only seen one gif of him.

The 13th doctor keeps forgetting she's in a woman's body.

It is all very gay.

David Tennant's arms are too long.

The sexiest person is a head.

The Meep's pronouns are Meep. Meep is not friend. IF NOT FRIEND THEN WHY FRIEND SHAPED??????

A buttcheek skin talks or something yeah this is all I got.

have at it y'all @robinprinceofchaos @multidimensional-trashcan @wispedvellichor @queermarzipan thanks for the second hand brainrot

*sneaks away under the cover of night* i was never here

[adripakoffee]

I don't post on here often and by that I mean I'm on here once a month to look at writing prompts but right now I'm thinking of Anya from Mouthwashing, and Tumblr is better for long form posts. Apologies if this rant isn't super clear, I'm on pain meds right now.

CW: S/A, SUICIDE, OVERDOSE, MOUTHWASHING SPOILERS

Anyway, Anya very well may be one of the most doomed characters to ever doom. Firstly she's trapped in a relatively small space ship with 4 men, who she has to keep alive and healthy along with giving them periodic mental wellness checks (which she, herself never gets). Two of these men don't take her seriously at all because she probably doesn't actually have a medical degree and is just someone the company hired to cut corners. If that wasn't all ready awful, the co-captain, Jimmy, has been assaulting her since at least the start of this voyage that's been going on for 100+ days. She falls pregnant because of this and while this isn't where her spiral started, this is where it gets worse. She originally plans to kill herself with the Captain's gun, but decides against it since she can't get to the gun without Curly's help anyway.

Speaking of Curly, he knows what's been going on, she told him about Jimmy a while before the crash. Every time, Curly says "I'll do something about it," or "I'll fix this," but the most he does is keep Jimmy away from Anya when they're working. Anya seems fine with that for the most part because I think she assumes Curly will report Jimmy and have him arrested when they land (he won't, at this point in the game he'd defend Jimmy for anything because "he sees the best in people. He loves to say "our worst moments don't define us" and apparently that extends to r@pe). So at this point, she's biding her time until they land.

Back to the gun, when Curly finds her holed up in the cockpit, she tells him she's pregnant. He's a little taken aback but he tries to reassure her that it's fine and he'll fix the "situation" with Jimmy. He says he can't let her kill herself because he does actually care about her. One of his flaws is he cares about everyone so much he can't imagine compromising one of them for any reason. Anya tells him she wasn't going to hurt herself, though she thought about it, she just hid the gun case so Jimmy couldn't kill her instead. She's so convinced Jimmy just wants to kill and torment her when the sad truth is, he couldn’t care less.

In all of Jimmy's "take responsibility" hallucinations, Anya barely shows up. Swansea, Curly, and Daisuke do, but he can't bring himself to even recognize what's happened to Anya is also solely his fault. He doesn't care at all.

Speaking of which, what seems the straw that breaks the camel's back for Jimmy is Anya telling him that she's pregnant because he crashes the ship pretty sure after. And this really seems like a spur of the moment action because if he'd planned this he could've done it much earlier after the news of the company closing reached them.

Curly says Anya should've waited for him to help her tell Jimmy about the pregnancy, but that doesn't matter because he is put out of commission like (I forgot if it's a day later or the same day) later because he's in the cockpit when the ship crashes.

Now Anya has no hope, Jimmy knows she's pregnant, the seemingly one line of defense she has against him can't leave his bed, and they're stuck in space. She's terrified because not only because of that, but because Jimmy is captain now and because of the way the ship is set up, you need the captain for a lot of things. Jimmy being captain also means if he finds the gun case, he now has the code to open it.

Anya, being the ships medic, is tasked with keeping Curly alive and giving him his meds. It's really difficult for her, A. because Curly is hard to look at, B. because unless he's full of pain meds, he's making noise, and C. because that was her friend and one of the only people she felt safe around and he's been reduced to this. And from her perspective, this is his fault, Curly crashed the ship.

This situation is stressful for everyone, Swansea has reverted back to alcoholism and never drops the ax he has, Daisuke is slowly losing hope and also starts drinking, and Jimmy won't stop yelling at her. He's so pissed at her the entire game, more so than everyone else. She was already scared of him but before there was at least a light at the end of the tunnel. Now there's nothing to look forward to because she doesn't think there's any way out.

She, at some point when he's sober enough, confides in Swansea who then tells her that she's gonna be the one to get out of here. He has the one last working cryo pod set aside for her specifically and refuses to let anyone into the room where it is. Unfortunately, at this point, her anxiety concerning Jimmy is so bad, she's convinced he'd do something to the pod too.

So then Anya locks herself in the med bay with Curly and all the rest of the ships medicine (- minus the Isopropyl which she probably left for Daisuke and Swansea) and overdoses by Curly's bed. Curly was awake the whole time she went through a probably painful death. She also, as maybe a final revenge, took the last of the pain meds that were meant for Curly. And she dies right next to him.

That's where her story ends. She felt so trapped and scared by her r@pist that got her pregnant that she killed herself next to the one person who could've done something, but instead, from her perspective, trapped her with said r@pist.

She died probably hoping that Daisuke or Swansea would make it out, not knowing they died soon after.

TLDR;

So from her perspective: A guy she's been friends with for years starts repeatedly assaulting her and she's stuck with him, then he gets her pregnant. Her other friend who she tells says he'll do something about it (he won't) and she has no choice but to trust him. Then the guy she told crashes the ship they're all on and fails in taking himself out. Now she's trapped with her r@pist and she tells someone else who does actually try to do something but she kills herself instead.

Anyways guys, I'm just missing my wife, the end.

[fandomapocalypse]

Love and relationships in Hazbin Hotel

Episode 7 has something interesting and in the song that is called "Out for love" is sung by a character that is referring to a type of love different from a romantic or sexual one, Carmilla is openly talking about familial love. Vaggie of course relates this to her romantic feelings towards Charlie and how she wants to help her. But something else interesting happens in episode 7, Rosie is properly introduced as Alastor's bestie. This leads to showing another type of love: platonic love.

Now to the main point of this post: Alastor. It's canon that he is aroace and as an ace myself (I'm still questioning whether I'm aromantic or demiromantic but this post isn't about me lol) I'm extremely happy to see myself through him. Plus, the fact that the perfect Tumblr sexyman is aroace is genius and hilarious, you can't possibly top this type of humor.

Alastor for me has been a great ace representation and I've seen myself mainly in how he acts around his friends or other people.

When it comes to Niffty it looks more like a relationship between someone with their feral cat or their crazy little sister. But it's still a genuine connection and a fun chaotic one at that, he even lets her touch his hair and climb on him. In regards to Mimzy, he has shown he cares about her and welcomes her with open arms. He openly hugs her, which shocks everyone in the cast. This is extremely important because Alastor usually only starts physical contact to mock others or to pretend physical closeness as a manipulation tactic (like he often does with Charlie). When it comes to people he hates Alastor may touch them but will quickly wipe his hand on his clothes, like what he did with Lucifer. Personally, I don't like personal contact and only accept it if I start it and usually I use it as a way to show affection with close friends. Also, they have known each other since they were alive, so Mimzy probably knows a lot about Alastor that the rest of the cast doesn't. Mimzy also says that they used to dance together. But that doesn't exclude the fact that she uses Alastor's friendship and affection to save her own ass and taking into account how Husk reacted to Mimzy, this isn't the first time she does this. Also, the relationship between the two starts to crumble after what happened in episode 6 and Mimzy seems to be the kind of friend who will pretend that they are still on good terms and still ask Alastor for favors in the future.

Now jumping back to Alastor's true bestie: Rosie. They probably bonded at first over their cannibalistic natures but it's clear that it evolved beyond that. Personally, I don't ship Alastor with anyone, but when it comes to Rosie I headcanon they are in a QPR.

There are various reasons why this relationship is so great and wholesome, the first one being that there is no power imbalance, they are equals. Both are cannibalistic overlords and are on equal footing in terms of power. When Rosie first sees Alastor she is genuinely happy which is something new because most people react badly to him out of fear or hatred.

Alastor respects Rosie, he even compliments her, in her introduction he says she is "the most darling, delightful, and dangerous Overlord of this side of the pentagram". Considering how self-centered and narcissistic he can be, it means a lot. Alastor would rather die again than compliment another Overlord who isn't Zestial, which he respects but out of fear. Alastor respects Rosie as his close friend. When they stand next to each other they give an air of equals, something that never happens thanks to Alastor's ego and sadism towering over everyone else. With Rosie it's different and Rosie can openly tease Alastor with the "Look at you, so polite! Alastor you can learn a thing or two" when comparing him to Charlie when meeting her, or "I'm just kidding, I know you're an ace in the hole" to tease him about his asexuality. This is something that not a lot of people can do because Alastor is obsessed with control and respect. After all, we see how badly he reacted when Husk insulted him.

He also harmonizes with her, he willingly makes a duet with her in "Ready for this". He isn't interrupting her, instead, he agrees with her and they sing together in unison. This is the first time he doesn't openly hijack a song or fight for control over it, like he did with Vox and Lucifer (although this also happened because this is Charlie's song, but who cares the point still stands). Also, this is the first time we see him dance with someone, instead of forcing them to join his musical number (like he does with Charlie on various occasions). Alastor and Rosie are in perfect sync and it's so wholesome and precious to see him being so openly happy with her. Many have pointed out that the only times Alastor is genuinely smiling is when he is with Rosie and it shows by his expression in his eyes.

Finally, Rosie is the only one capable of bringing the most human emotions out of him, the most obvious one being confusion. In the scene of "ace in the hole" Rosie manages to confuse and surprise Alastor for a solid second, which is a huge change of his persona around everyone else of control and manipulation. Also, it's hilarious that Alastor doesn't know what being aroace is, he probably thinks he is above all that.

He is openly relaxed around Rosie and lets her touch him in an affectionate way, something that not even Mimzy can do. It may be because of the height difference but Mimzy only touches Alastor to hug him and to emphasize he is a "heartless son of a bitch" and Alastor clearly gets irritated by her touching him that way and even moves her finger away from him. This never happens with Rosie and he even welcomes her touching him by not having any walls with her. It's Rosie the one starting the physical contact and Alastor doesn't seem to mind and he never tries to use physical contact to take advantage of her like he does with other characters. Rosie is one of the few people who can touch Alastor without losing an arm and instead have a positive reaction out of him.

The most genuine relationship Alastor has is with Rosie, he even has the confidence and comfort to stop his elegant and reserved persona of not swearing. Which he only does when he is truly angry, like what happened with Lucifer. Or when he is threatening someone like he did with Adam. Or when he is shocked when his microphone breaks. He swears to insult Susan, which is someone they both despise equally. Something that you would only do with your closest bestie.

Finally, let's talk about Alastor's breakdown in the last episode. We've already seen that Alastor is capable of having friendships that aren't based on an end goal. Alastor knows this but he rejects it because he is at the hotel originally for selfish goals and doesn't want his emotions to get in the way. He is terrified of ruining his reputation as a sadistic killer and becoming an altruistic who cares about his friends. Alastor wants to stop himself from starting to care about the crew the same way he cares about Rosie, Mimzy, or Nifty to some degree. This is confirmed by his conversation with Niffty, where he admits he has grown accustomed to the main crew and perhaps he is growing feelings of affection towards them in his own way.

In regards to shipping him with Rosie, I see it as a platonic ship or a QPR. Some people have a headcanon that if they had known each other when they were alive they would have married for tax benefits and to avoid the social stigma, which is the only right answer. When they first met in hell they probably had dates in cannibal town where they ate human flesh while gossiping and trash-talked about the other overlords. Which is exactly what an ace person like myself wants from a close friendship.

As an ace, I really like Alastor not because he is the ultimate Tumblr sexyman or see him as hot but because he is an extremely fun character that I can relate to. I'm grateful for the crew and VA that take into account he is aroace and take seriously that aspect of his character. I don't mind that the aroace representation in Hazbn Hotel is a narcissistic psychopath, if you want a more wholesome ace representation you can check Todd in Bojack Horseman or Saiki in The Disastrous Life of Saiki K.

I don't mind people shipping Alastor, after all, it's just people having fun, but you can't ignore that he is aroace and how this affects his relationships. So yeah have fun and respect and aroace community :)

ok thanks for hearing my rant bye

[plaidos]

Aabria just works at dropout, she's not in charge of hiring or casts, even the director and producer has more control over the cast, Aabria doesnt even work at dropout, she's a guest game master, I don't think she has the power to decide casts, because again, she's a guest gm.

and i’ve never said anything to the contrary 😭 like trust me i don’t blame Aabria for any of this it would be foolish to assume that she is total control over something like this, like, she is the host of a tv show rather than an ordinary DM looking for players in her happened-to-be-streamed campaign — you’re totally right.

…that being said, when she starts (from her personal tumblr account that she uses to talk to fans) blocking trans people who are saying “hey, i noticed there aren’t many trans women in this work environment, and that’s troubling as a transfeminine fan, i hope it’s addressed in future” it does make me start to wonder how she feels about the whole thing.

and also, you know… she has a voice on this show that i — and every other trans woman on earth — don’t. she could say, tweet something, post something even something simple in reference to these concerns. and if she’s not allowed to, if she’s for some reason contractually obligated to not acknowledge stuff like this… then that’s fucked up and she deserves better!!!!

i want to reiterate that the criticism at hand absolutely goes for any & every show on Dropout. whilst i think people have a very fair point in being frustrated that there are no transfeminine players in MisMag specifically, there aren’t enough transfem people ANYWHERE at Dropout, on any Dimension 20 show, Game Changer, Make Some Noise, Dirty Laundry etc etc and to blame Aabria — a guest host — for the shortcomings of a bunch of likely cisgender white men making the casting decisions is obviously racist. anybody who is harassing her or smearing her, cut that shit out. It isn’t helping anybody, it’s making the environment worse for all minorities.

…But again, it would be nice if she didn’t block trans women politely asking to see more transfem talent at her place of work, regardless of her control over that. I think that sets a bad precedent for this discussion & for communication with the transfeminine fans.

[rebornofstars]

SEPFEMBER 2024 PROMPTS LIST

HERE WE ARE! AT LONG LAST! THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN (HOPEFULLY) WAITING FOR! GIRL MONTH!

I honestly can't believe this is actually happening. This event was a shower thought a few months ago.

Here's a recap of the event: to participate, make at least one fanwork of any variety during September that features a woman or women from the Zelda franchise as the main character/s. All Linksmeets are welcome in this challenge, as well as general LoZ fans!

Before I drop the prompts list for those who are looking for a little direction, I'd like to mention that I have made an AO3 COLLECTION FOR THIS EVENT. It's open and unmoderated so you can add your works to it freely. And if you post on tumblr, please tag #sepfember !! I'll be scrolling through the tag every day looking for things to reblog and gush about 👀

If you have any questions at all about this event, or you want to chat about it, my askbox is open! I will also respond to comments and reblogs of this post.

Now, onto the prompts. Disclaimer: you DON'T have to use all/any of these prompts, or only create things for certain characters on their featured day. This list is just a GUIDE for those who want it. If you have other plans, go with your heart!

At the end of the day, this is a celebration, and all that matters is that you have fun. I hope some of you will join me next month in giving our girls some time in the spotlight, but if you can't, that's okay! There's no pressure! This is just a passion project of mine, really, and I am overjoyed that people are interested 💛💛💛

(apologies in advance for the terrible quality of these pics and the equally terrible commentary. i thought it would be funny. also, i've never had to come up with a prompts list before and it shows.)

DAY 1: SKYWARD SWORD ZELDA + PURPOSE

(we start at the beginning of course 💛)

DAY 2: MARIN + WASH

(it was SO hard to find a screenshot of her that didn't have link in it. they're both cute but this ain't about him.)

DAY 3: MEDLI + GIFT

(i didn't know she played the harp until i saw this screenshot! i obviously have a lot to learn.)

DAY 4: TWILIGHT PRINCESS ZELDA + FREEZE

(how creepy does she look here?! so awesome)

DAY 5: HILDA + GHOST

(SUCH a good character for real. she has depth!!!! she has a thematic purpose!!!)

DAY 6: URBOSA + LOSE

(two words: LIGHTNING POWERS ⚡⚡⚡)

DAY 7: SPIRIT TRACKS ZELDA + MISTAKE

(babygirl you are 2 entire pixels.)

DAY 8: FI + ORDER

(oh she is everything to me)

DAY 9: MIDNA + SWORD

(she looks so soulful right now)

DAY 10: HYRULE WARRIORS ZELDA + SUMMON

(what a FIRE camera angle??? her armour is so impractically attached but SHE HAS A SWORD‼️)

DAY 11: GODDESSES OF HYRULE + EYES

(hylia, din, nayru, farore, the list goes on...)

DAY 12: ZORA PRINCESSES + TRUST

(mipha, ruto... poor suckers... it can't be fun, falling for link...)

DAY 13: OCARINA OF TIME ZELDA | SHEIK + FATE

(note: I personally hc this character as a trans man, but since this isn't explicitly confirmed in-game and might not be shared with everyone, I've given them a celebration day anyway. you are free to do what you wish.)

DAY 14: MALON + GUARD

(she is adorable. look at her)

DAY 15: IMPA + BOUND

(HOTTEST MOST SEXY MOST BADASS WOMAN IN THE FRANCHISE ‼️‼️‼️ I LOVE YOU IMPA YOU ARE PERFECT. SHUT UP I DEFINITELY DON'T PLAY FAVOURITES—)

DAY 16: FOUR SWORDS ADVENTURES ZELDA + PORTAL

(i loved her in the fsa manga. she's barely in it but STILL. go read it.)

DAY 17: FAIRIES + TIRED

(the great fairies, navi, ciela, tatl, proxi...)

DAY 18: TETRA + LEGACY

(isn't she KICKASS?!)

DAY 19: EPONA + BONE

(our lovely loyal girl 🥰)

DAY 20: A LINK BETWEEN WORLDS ZELDA + HOME

(SHE IS SUCH A GOOD PARALLEL TO HILDA PLEASSSSSE)

DAY 21: SARIA + WISH

(a classic character! isn't this picture so peaceful)

DAY 22: BOTW/AOC/TOTK ZELDA + PEACE

(SHE IS EVERYTHING TO ME. SCREAMING CLAWING CRYING. MY DARLING, YOUR FANARTISTS WERE THE ONES TO DRAW ME INTO THE ZELDA FANDOM. I HOPE I CAN RETURN THE FAVOUR ONE DAY)

DAY 23: CIA + LANA + STUDY

(technically, she's one person. between the two of them they certainly only wear enough clothes for one person... )

DAY 24: ARYLL + HUG

(sister to the hero! but what's her story?)

DAY 25: ECHOES OF WISDOM ZELDA + ARREST

(YEAHHHHHHHHH GIRL MONTH GIRL DAY GIRL GAME!!!)

DAY 26: CD-i ZELDA + HOLIDAY

(hehheehehehe. i bet you weren't expecting her. neither was i tbh)

DAY 27: PURAH + FIRE

(SHE'S CLEVER! I LOVE CLEVER WOMEN!)

DAY 28: ILIA + ERUNE + MEND

(listen. i know erune is a very niche character - she literally only exists in the four swords manga - but consider. i love her)

DAY 29: ALTTP/OOS/OOA/LA ZELDA + MISSING

(she has no canon personality. you know what that means. get the building equipment out fellas)

DAY 30: LINKLE + FAREWELL

(and here we are - LAST DAY!)

THE END! YAY! I CAN'T WAIT FOR SEPTEMBER - CAN YOU?

[gloster]

FAVORITE FANFICS OF 2024

2024 is/will/already over....and dear gosh, this year really kicked my butt. Drained me dry. Did a number on me mentally, emotionally, and even my wallet took too many hits. But I live to see another day & enter another year.

As always, the things helped me get through this year was friends both fandom & IRL, good movies, good shows, good music from familiar favs with new albums to KPOP, and of course FANFICS.

Every year fanfic writers both familiar & new to me blow me away with their talent, their writing, their brilliance. And every year I always do this traditional post to give them their flowers. Hence, the reason for this sweet lil' post of mine.

This is a little Tumblr tradition I've been doing now for a whooping 6 years & I look forward to it every time. It's my own favorite of fanfic rec lists. I did ones for 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021, 2022, & 2023 if you're interested.

Without further ado, here are my favs.

1). however wild by @sayesayes & @noxarcanaart (steddie)

Summary: Prince Steve has always been told to stay out of the forest. And he does… when he’s awake.

This story 🖤this story🖤 this story 🖤this story 🖤 This beautiful, beautiful, incredibly addicting dark jewel is the reason why I was sucked into the steddie fandom- the amazingness that is this story, the beautiful fanart done by @noxarcanaart, & my bestie @dreamydrarry who was determined to pull me into the steddie ship b/c she needed a friend to gush with.

Fun fact. I saved this story on my marked for later for my friend @dreamydrarry b/c this story sounded right up her alley. However, I was too intrigued, particularly thanks to the key word: fae. I love fae. That's one of my magical creatures to read about in fantasy, so whenever I see it mentioned in a story, I have to read. For this one, I decided to read it. And I've never been the same again.

This story was just a masterpiece. A pure masterpiece from beginning to end, living rent-free in my head where I keep thinking about it, Prince Steve being so gentle & brave, fae-Eddie being wicked one second and so devoted the next.

I purposefully delayed my reading because I didn't want it to end. And once I finished, I immediately hopped on to see what other steddie stories @sayesayes had.

Honorable mentions:

genius loci

Flight Risk

locust year

(there is) thunder in our hearts

girlskin

too good to be true

daddy talk series

2). you might have some bruises (and a few scars) by @newtonsheffield (kathony/kanthony)

Summary: Matrimony- Gentleman, 27, seeking eligible lady. Respectable income made from farming livestock and barley in Aubrey, Kent. Gentleman lives with, and provides for six younger siblings and is seeking a wife who would tend to their care and education first and foremost. Family is very important and as such would be willing to provide a living for the lady’s family should this be required. Please send responses through Mrs M Williams, Aubrey village. -Mr A E Bridgerton

OR

Dear Mr Bridgerton, I hope this letter finds both you and your family well as I know the end of Winter tends to lend itself to small children finding themselves unwell. I am writing with regards to the advertisement I noted in the newspaper this past Sunday. I am six and twenty and reside in Somerset, where I grew up, with my mother.

OR

Anthony is a handsome farmer in need of a mother for his younger siblings and no time for courting

OR

The marriage of convenience AU no one needed

Once upon a time, I used to despise marriage being used as a trope in stories from arranged marriages to marriages of convenience. As usual- fanfics came along and completely changed my mind. This story is an example of that. This story also made me more open-minded to farming and farmers in stories, which I never thought of before until I stumbled across this story.

@newtonsheffieldis that writer, especially for the kathony/kanthony fandom, feeding us well with the content and love the damn show refuses to give our favs.

Just when I think I can't love Kate & Anthony anymore, this story deepened my love 100000x fold.

Honorable mentions:

Cupboards

(I feel) the lavender haze creeping up on me

3). I know I've kissed you before (Can I try again) by @transmascsteveharrington (steddie)

Summary: “Still not graduated, Harrington?”

It’s something Eddie would have said teasingly when they were teens. Steve would have smacked him on the shoulder, affectionately calling him an asshole before being pulled into an apologetic kiss. But they are not teenagers anymore and Eddie’s voice lacks any of the warmth that used to be reserved for Steve. Now, it’s just loaded with resentment, which, yeah, is a fair reaction.

“I…eh…work here now,” Steve says lamely and points at his office door. “Guidance counselor.”

or: 14 years after his first big heartbreak, Steve's life is relatively stable. It's been two years since the tragic incident that led to him becoming Dustin's guardian, both of them slowly healing. He is doing amazing at his job and his social life is great. Of course, that's when a person from Steve's past has to come and shake everything up.

OH. MY. GOSH. THIS STORY-THIS STORY-THIS STORY-THIS STORY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Best way I can describe this story is the famous Lady Gaga meme: talented, brilliant, incredible, amazing, show stopping, spectacular, never the same, totally unique, completely not ever been done before, unafraid to reference or not reference, put it in a blender, shit on it, vomit on it, eat it, give birth to it.

Second chance romance is incredibly hard to do, which many try (particularly published authors) and very few can pull off. This story did it well where my heart was lifted, speared, crushed, sewed-up, & melted in an orderly fashion.

4). Living The Unknown Dream by @blushweddinggowns (steddie)

Summary: “How are you feeling?” Steve asked, all wide-eyed and caring.

Eddie gaped at him, fully aware that his entire face must be red. He was trying to form words, he really was, but Steve single handedly put the brakes on that.

Why was Steve Harrington holding his hand? Why was Steve Harrington calling him baby ?

Why did he kiss him, like it was the most natural thing in the world?

Only fanfic writers. Only fanfic writers can take tropes that usually don't tend to stick and turn them into brilliant stories. Amnesia trope is one I've grown to loathe after getting burnt- and incredibly frustrated by it- too many times in other stories. But with this one, I was too intrigued and oh how I fell. Oh how I was proven wrong. And I'm so happy for it.

Yet another story that just deepened my love for a ship that I already carried such deep love for, but then this story came along and it increased 1000000000x.

5). The Yellow Tulips of Texas by @folklauerate (kathony/kanthony)

Summary: Kate runs into a store to get out of the rain, and runs right into a southern gentleman.

(or Texas!Anthony and New Yorker!Kate fall in love)

“You should go,” He says, drawl somehow even stronger now, or is she imagining it? “Most beautiful place on God’s green earth.”

She snorts.

“You laugh now, but just you wait,” He says. “You’ll see, one day.”

“What makes you so sure I’ll go to Texas?”

She has a feeling she knows why he’s so sure, but she asks anyway.

He grins at her.

“A man just knows these things, honey.”

For y'all who didn't think you couldn't be anymore thirsty for Mr. Anthony Bridgerton/ Jonathon Bailey, BEHOLD *presents story in full gusto*. Be Prepared. This story will make you perch for him because 🥵🥵🥵

I do not care for age gap romances. I really don't. Most of what I read usually rub me the wrong way, but the way this one was done, I was greatly impressed. Partially because of their ages where Kate is in her mid-20s & Anthony in his 40s, which isn't too bad. Partially because the writer just knows their stuff and makes magic.

It's because of this story I started hunting for more age-gap romances.

Honorable mentions:

lost in your current like a priceless wine

The MILF in 2B

6). Come Away with Me by FloralUmbrella (kathony/kanthony)

Summary: Anthony and Kate whisk away on their honeymoon. An exploration into the world of intimacy and marriage ensues.

If you are like me, you weren't that particularly impressed with season 3 of Bridgerton for a number of reasons. Including the very very limited scenes of kathony/kanthony, and lack of attention they were given both on-and-off screen.

It's time like this when fanfic writers come through & deliver the content we so desperately need. This story gives us the honeymoon period we were denied in the show, where we see our fav just fall deeper and deeper in love while also learning more about each other.

7). When You Kiss Me (What A Lovely Way To Burn) by @femmequixotic (drarry)

Summary: A drag fairytale of New York in which Draco wears red lipstick and Potter can’t get enough.

An oldie but such a good good goodie. Listen I will always advocate for older fanfics and giving them a chance because you can find some good treasures.

Nothing is more better than going to a story you've been saving forever and it ending up being so much better than expected. Confident Draco in drag, trying to bury the ghosts of his past. Harry stumbling across his club and needing an escape. It's so so so so good.

8). The Librarian by library_fireplace (drarry)

Summary: Draco Malfoy is a reference librarian at a small branch of Britain's wizarding public library system. Harry Potter needs help finding the romance section.

~*~

“Malfoy,” Potter said, slowly. “When did you read The Dragon Tamer?”

Draco felt himself turning pink, and then red. He hadn’t meant to give himself away quite that much, but he also knew that Potter suspected him of following his reading history. He had been found out for his snooping. “I —“ he stuttered embarrassingly, and wanted to melt away into the floor behind the desk. “A few weeks ago, now.”

“And how many romances had you read before that?” Potter pressed, now smirking again, knowingly this time, leaning forward with his arms crossed on the desk. Draco felt himself break out in a shiver that he hoped wouldn’t turn into a sweat.

“Er… None, I’m afraid,” he found himself admitting, even though he had really meant to lie.

“Draco,” Potter smiled. “Did you read it just because I had read it?”

Draco scoffed audibly, but very unconvincingly. “No!”

“I think you did.”

Books have the power to bring people together, even helping old rivals find common ground- and more- within the wonders that lay in their pages. Including some good old smutty smutty.

It's a tale as old as time. Stuffy librarian who believes in "fine literature" A hardcore, shameless romance reader who loves their smut and isn't afraid to show it. This story already was promising featuring Draco as a librarian who has a perfect system for organizing his books. But having Harry be a romance reader whose big stack intrigues Draco into reading, having him fall hard...it's PRICELESS.

9). blood is an aphrodisiac by @cuips-not-cute (steddie)

Summary: There’s a few things Eddie notices when he wakes up.

One, he bites his tongue. It hurts. Of course. The weird thing, though, is he doesn’t taste blood. But he knows he bit it hard and it’s throbbing behind his teeth. He tastes something, and his mouth feels wet but there’s no metallic flavor (metal. He likes metal. He’s remembering). It’s smoother. More earthy.

Two. He’s alone. Completely. No Dustin. Or Robin or Nancy or Steve or anyone.

Three. He’s sore. His whole body aches, his skin is thrumming with it. His neck especially, and his sides like where Steve was bitten, too.

Four. He’s got to blink a couple times to realize this one. Let his eyes adjust from the pitch black of being closed to the dim blue haze of the Upside Down. Yeah, that’s what he realizes. He’s still there.

Five. He’s fuckin’ starving.

In which Eddie wakes up with sharp teeth, Steve has a thing for tongue piercings, and it takes a while for them to figure out what all of that means.

I'm convinced this story was the starter behind the vampire/kas!Eddie fanart I be seeing. Like everytime I see vampire Eddie, I think of this story and the biggest smile spread across my face.

I binged this story. I read it in one sitting-and immediately wanted to go back to the beginning to read all over again. This story felt like one of those urban fantasies, where it's modern day, vampires exist, but they're integrated into modern world. Also despite the fangs and the blood thrist, vampirism has very little to do with the plot and is a stepping stone for these two getting together.

I just how Steve wasn't at all shy about his attraction and just want with it. Meanwhile Eddie is just like 😨🤯😶 I LOVE IT.

Honorable mention:

he could be brave

blinking red light

10). The Stutter and The Freak series by @lexirosewrites (steddie)

Summary: The Hellfire Club can collectively pinpoint the exact day that the formerly ruthless dungeon master known as Eddie “The Freak” Munson became soft. Mostly because it was the same day that Steve “The Stutter” Harrington started school at Hawkins High and became an unofficial member of HFC.

If there's another fanfic writer whose profile I've been devouring, it would be @lexirosewrites. And each one, I get more and more hooked. They have so many stories that I really adored, including the first honorable mentioned that tied with this one for top fav. But there's something about this one that gets me every time.

This one, Steve is such a sweet baby boy who deserved to be protected and Eddie immediately is like, BET, I accept that challenge. Quickly Steve is taken under Dustin's wing, taken into the Hellfire Club, and immediately captures Eddie's heart.

It's a comfort read.

Honorable mentions:

my heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue

Silver

Bandaids for the Heart

And now for the Honorable Mentions that were insanely good but due to time & length, couldn’t go into full depth:

Love You Like A Love Song series by eyesofshinigami (steddie; omegaverse steddie w/alpha Steve & omega Eddie, dissolving and switching norms in the ABO on its head, being so sappily in love)

awake for ever in a sweet unrest: california trail steddie by hesjustlikemefr (steddie; California trail, mid-1800s, alpha Eddie x omega Steve, mpreg, age gap w/older Eddie)

Nice & Quiet by nobetterlove (steddie; hard of hearing Steve, Steve slowly losing his hearing, Eddie & the gang helping him all the way)

you're mine, class president by orphan account (tododeku; based on the anime maid sama ft. flirtious shouto x shy izuku, peppered with so much cuteness)

For the Love of Football by olddarkmachine (sheith; football player shiro x loner-keith set in a 4-part college AU that's so much fun)

Hic sunt dracones by @just-my-latest-hyperfixation (steddie; fated mates w/dragon Eddie & prince Steve, delivered with such beautiful devotion and possessiveness that I gobbled up)

There you have it, folks. The fanfics that live rent-free in my head. The fanfics that helped make this year bearable. Done by the amazing writers who deserve all the praise, love, kudos, comments, and more. And whom I definitely will be checking out their future stuff in the future.

HAPPY NEW YEAR

[youremyheaven]

The Internal Corrosiveness of Venus: Venusian Women & Self Harm

TW: self harm, abuse, suicide, violence, trauma

Claire had remarked that "Venus is internally corrosive whilst externally pleasant and Mars is externally corrosive but internally pleasant". This led me down a rabbit hole to try to understand whether this "internally corrosive" nature manifests as self harm & eating disorders and unfortunately, it does. Venusian women struggle with perfectionism and are extremely self-critical. Venusian energy is HARSH. Venus natives struggle to uphold a certain standard that they subject themselves too because if I'm being honest Venus is the OG "not like other girls girl", they believe they're better than others, and tbh in many ways they probably are but this also means they put undue pressure on themselves to keep being that way.

All Venusian naks are Ugra or "fierce" in nature and while I've talked about how Venusian violence and cruelty can be directed at others in my other posts, I think its worth mentioning how Venusians can be just as cruel to themselves. This is especially true of Venusian women as women internalise their problems while men wreak external havoc (like causing wards and killing people) but there are many male Venusians who struggle internally as well.

In ancient religions, Goddesses of love also had other functions or powers that had nothing to do with love

the Egyptian Goddess Isis was the goddess of love, healing, fertility, magic, and the moon. She was the goddess of life and magic, Isis protected women and children and healed the sick.

She was a great magician, whose power transcended that of all other deities.

The Mesopotamian Goddess Ishtar is the goddess of love and sexuality, and thus, fertility; she is responsible for all life, but she is never a Mother goddess. She is also the Goddess of War.

I'm using these examples to show that the ancients had a more complex and nuanced understanding of Venusian energy. One cannot worship love without understanding that "war" is a consequence of it. Love & war are not very different from each other. When someone believes in something and is willing to die for it, we find that to be very honourable. Sometimes this belief leads men to kill others over it and depending on the cause, we describe the war as "good" or "bad" (kill a bunch of fascists and then its a "righteous" war, if you kill innocent people, then its an unholy war etc). Being at a state of war describes Venusian nature very well since Venus is also connected to royalty and if you're born into royalty, you get to live a very "exclusive" very privileged life that few get to enjoy but the stakes are also that much higher since you could be beheaded or executed or exiled and live a life that is far worse than the average person.

In this post I want to explore how this "state of war" can manifest internally in an ordinary Venusian and contribute to self harm, eating disorders and drug abuse.

Bella Hadid- Purvaphalguni Moon & Rising

Bella has admitted to smoking since she was a teenager and getting a rhinoplasty at 14. Her pro ana Tumblr from when she was a teen is infamous at this point. She has never openly spoken about it but it is widely speculated that she struggles with an eating disorder and possible drug abuse as well.

“I was the uglier sister. I was the brunette. I wasn't as cool as Gigi, not as outgoing,” she said. “That's really what people said about me.” I also feel like Venusians grow up feeling really ugly and completely unaware of their magnetism. They only really grow into their looks when they're older (obvs there are exceptions) and I think being bullied for what they have and don't have are also big themes.

Demi Lovato- Bharani Moon

Demi has spoken about struggling with self harm, eating disorders and drug abuse.

Lovato said, “growing up, I had been bullied in school,” saying she “felt like an outsider," and "like an outcast,” but then she became friends with a girl who was popular. “One day, I asked her ‘how do you have all these friends?,’” Lovato noted, and the girl asked Lovato “do you party?" Lovato explained, "She asked me, 'Do you drink?,'" with Lovato saying that this was her first experience with drugs and alcohol, adding, “we experienced a lot of stuff together, drinking and using, and growing up.” Bharani being an outcaste nakshatra resulted in Demi feeling like one growing one :(((

Taylor Swift- Purvashada Rising

Taylor opened up about her eating disorder in her documentary

Lindsay Lohan- Bharani Moon

LiLo has struggled with self harm, drug abuse and battled eating disorders

Oscar Wilde, Purvaphalguni Rising wrote The Picture of Dorian Gray

The plot goes like this : An attractive Englishman's image is captured in a painting that keeps him from ageing, when he exchanges his soul for eternal beauty. But for every sin that he commits, his image in the portrait rots.

This is a very deeply Venusian story, and very specifically Purvaphalguni esque because Purvaphalguni is the height of Venus. It can be said that its also true of Venusians in general. They are outwardly splendorous, they seem to have it all together but inwardly they tend to be inflicting wounds upon themselves in order to keep it all together.

Johnny Depp- Purvashadha Moon

He has also battled eating disorders, self harm and drug abuse.

Iggy Pop- Bharani Moon

"THERE IS EXTREME, there is legendary — and then there is Iggy Pop. Beginning in his earliest days with the Stooges taunting Ann Arbor frat boys and small town Michigan folk, Iggy made an art of excess: self-mutilation, self-exposure and self-destruction. His risky theatricality required an audience to respond, participate or get the heck out of there. And the sex and violence hardly stopped after the show was over."- this is how Rolling Stone described Iggy Pop and tbh this is a very Venusian description

In 1974, at his first solo concert dubbed The Murder of a Virgin. "Do you want to see blood?" Iggy asked the crowd, which howled affirmatively back at him. Then, at Iggy's urging, guitarist Ron Asheton, wearing a Nazi outfit, whipped Iggy repeatedly. Iggy began hurling racial epithets at a black spectator, hoping to goad the man into stabbing him with the steak knife he'd brought onstage. No luck, so he closed the set by carving an X into his chest himself.

Marilyn Manson- Purvashadha Sun

He has struggled with self harm in the past (there are images online if you're interested) and in 2013, he tried to simulate self harm on stage by holding a knife to his wrist in the middle of a performance??

Christina Ricci- Purvashadha Moon

Ricci has said she suffered from anorexia as a teenager and was sexually assaulted as a child. “There was no discussion at that time about trauma, and about recovering from those things, about PTSD,” she said. As a result, she ended up “acting out and coping in ways that weren't good."

Robert Downey Jr- Bharani Moon, Mars in Purvaphalguni

its pretty well known that RDJ was severely addicted to drugs at one point and it started when he was a child and drugs was given to him by his dad:///

Megan Fox- Purvashadha Rising

"I have body dysmorphia — I don't ever see myself the way other people see me," Fox said. "There's never a point in my life where I loved my body, never, ever." "When I was little, that was an obsession I had of, like, but I should look this way,"

‘However, at a certain point, I went through some trauma in childhood and I developed a pretty severe eating disorder and manic depression, which runs in my family, so there was definitely some wrestling with chemical imbalance going on,’ she shared.

its interesting how so many of these natives begin struggling with these issues very early in life

Colin Farrell- Purvashadha Rising, Jupiter conjunct Ketu in Bharani

While he did not say that he had cut himself when he was younger, Colin Farrell had some self-inflicting behavior during his younger days. He spoke on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno and said that he used to actually enjoy pulling out huge tufts of his hair. 

Pete Davidson- Purvaashadha Rising

'I used to bang my head against walls,' he admitted. 'If I couldn't deal with something -- if someone told me something sad or something I couldn't deal with I would bang my head against the wall, hoping I'd pass out because I didn't want to be in that situation because I couldn't handle that.

Melanie Lynskey- Bharani Moon

“I stopped throwing up, mostly. It took a while. But that was a big one. I had, for a very long time, been on this diet that was basically 800 calories a day, and if I ate anything over 800 calories, I would throw up,” she said. “I was never bingey. Sometimes I’d be starving, and I’d have another teacup of Special K. Then I’d be like, ‘Well, now I gotta throw it up.’”

Tila Tequila- Purvaphalguni Moon

On March 7, 2012, it was reported that Tequila had agreed to check into rehab after having reportedly "almost died" from an attempted suicide by overdosing on pills. The incident caused her to be hospitalized for a brain aneurysm. Tequila completed her rehab treatment on April 5, 2012.

Jeffree Star- Purvashadha Moon

images of him self harming once went viral

Till Lindemann- Purvashadha Sun

he's known for his SH scars and has even written poems about it in German??? its called "The poems: Knives on silent nights"

Portia de Rossi- Rahu in Purvashadha 2h

she's struggled with an eating disorder

Padma Lakshmi- Purvaphalguni Sun & Moon

"When filming "Top Chef," I consume about 5,000 to 8,000 calories a day,'' she wrote. "I typically gain anywhere from 10 to 17 pounds every season. Once I get home, what's taken me six weeks to gain takes me 12 weeks to take off. It's always a nail-biting extravaganza at fittings, praying that a few pretty dresses that came down the runway on a teenage model who is a size 0 will miraculously fit my 40-something body,'' she wrote. "Getting ready for the Emmys is always fun, and it's truly an honor to be nominated. But at the same time, in spite of my high metabolism, I worry each year that I'm not going to fit into anything nice. So, this year, I've decided my weight will not be my focus,'' she wrote. "If I need a bigger dress, so be it. That one day — or any day — on the red carpet isn't nearly as important as making sure my daughter doesn't measure her worth by her dress size."

i guess this is a more positive manifestation of Venusian self image struggles

Jessica Alba- Bharani Stellium (Sun, Mercury & Venus)

“I was meant to feel ashamed if I tempted men,” she said. “Then I stopped eating a lot when I became an actress. I made myself look more like a boy so I wouldn’t get as much attention.”

Katie Couric- Purvashadha Sun

“I wrestled with bulimia all through college and for two years after that,” she shared with Lovato while interviewing her, per Glamour. “I know this rigidity, this feeling that if you eat one thing that’s wrong, you’re full of self-loathing and then you punish yourself, whether it’s one cookie or a stick of gum that isn’t sugarless, that I would sometimes beat myself up for that. How do you have a healthy relationship with food, and say, ‘You know what, I can have one cookie and it’s OK?’ That is such a huge thing for people who wrestle with this.”

Zayn Mailk- Purvaphalguni Moon

 In his 2016 autobiography, Zayn, he shared it would sometimes cause him to go two or three days without eating a single bite of food. “Something I’ve never talked about in public before, but which I have come to terms with since leaving the band, is that I was suffering from an eating disorder. It got quite serious, although at the time I didn’t recognize it for what it was,” he wrote. “When I look back at images of myself—before the final tour—I can see how ill I was. The workload and the pace of life on the road put together with the pressures and strains of everything going on within the band had badly affected my eating habits. Food was something I could control, so I did.”

Zoe Kravitz- Purvaphalguni Moon conjunct Ketu

“I think it was part of being a woman, and being surrounded by [fame],” she said. “I think it was definitely about being around that world, seeing that world. I felt pressured.” After playing an anorexic character in a movie, she hit her lowest of lows and was so malnourished that her immune system shut down. Months later, she decided to make a change. “I just felt it was different,” she said. “I don’t know… if a f—king spirit came over me and said: ‘You have to stop.’”

Mel C, Purvaphalguni Rising

"When I was in the Spice Girls, the stress of suddenly being thrust into the limelight led me into an unhealthy relationship with food and exercise,” she told The Mirror in 2012. “I became obsessed about what I ate and I cut lots of food groups, like carbs and protein, out of my diet. I survived on fruit and vegetables and little else.”

Nicole Scherzinger- Mars conjunct Rising in Purvaphalguni

"I really struggled with feeling like I fit in. I even had a hard time feeling like I fit into my own skin. I was really hard on myself and had a lot of struggles with self-esteem and a lot of insecurities,” she said. “Later on, that resulted in me having eating disorders because of my body dysmorphia.”

if you're reading this and struggling, you're not alone. please get help!! its not too late to turn things around!! youre so strong and you can do this!!

[myceliacrochet]

Reblog if answer tysm!!

Buckle up people this one hurts.

Our society is pretty scared of people who are in great pain, even offended with them.

The feeling I get when speaking with Hala and reading her posts is, here is a person who has been undergoing psychological torture for 400+ days without relief.

True of all Palestinians in Gaza -- just the overwhelming impression I get with Hala.

And Hala Farid Suleiman al-Najjer is not someone who complains over small things. She maintains a trust in justice and goodness, in patient longsuffering and God's plan.

She is incredibly resilient

She is steadfast

She is screaming

She is screaming into the void

She is screaming at an unlistening world that has made and broken promises to her, a world that watches with glee as she and her people are tortured and killed.

I've said before that speaking with Hala can be disturbing. I'm scared of what I'm seeing happen to her.

Of course, we ought to speak in the active voice -- what Israel and the U.S. are doing to her right now, on purpose.

If your tax dollars have ever gone to the IDF, or if you are a person of privilege in some way (recognizing that that is not a criticism of you), here is a beautiful chance to pay some reparations and relieve some suffering.

A coward hides from the people who are suffering the most in the world, reprimands them, reviles them to mitigate his own cognitive dissonance.

A person of honor and courage loves.

Hala mentions in her GoFundMe that they pray that an angel will rescue them.

I believe in human angels -- a vast village of people working together to help.

You know, we mostly see on here the tip of the iceberg -- the Palestinians who have somehow been able to get vetted, show the exact right pictures, say the right things, learn how to use Tumblr.

It's my impression that Hala does not have the strength to do more than she is doing (which is a lot more than I would be able to do in her place).

Hala and her family much, much prefer that donations be sent through PayPal. They arrive faster, and this family needs swift relief.

Due to this, it is hard to track her donations, especially because it pains her to talk about any of this so I try not to pry. But it sounds like they have rarely ever gotten donations.

However, they also have a GoFundMe if the donation protection is important to you.

Vetting: Clean RIS, donation-protected GFM. I apologize that there is no vetting information for her and a couple of the Palestinians in my life. Use your own judgement. If it's a con, it's a weird one that doesn't follow the patterns I'm familiar with. Actually, it doesn't even follow the patterns of the kind of legitimate campaigns that are essentially manipulative (an understandable tactic when your family is dying). It's just screaming in despair and a wretched hope beyond hope.

Anyway, if you want to volunteer to help her apply for vetting, be put in contact with her, or offer verification info, please dm me.

@commissions4aid-international @wellwaterhysteria @mangocheesecakes @kyra45-helping-others @7bittersweet @321butz @monika-396 @erameteors @tortiefrancis @ot3 @amygdalae @ankle-beez @dykesbat @aristotels @komsomolka @prisonhannibal @rosawo7 @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @heritageposts @watermotif @stuckinapril @mavigator @lacecap @determinate-negation @deepspaceboytoy @paper-mario-wiki @kibumkim @socalgal @chilewithcarnage @ghelgheli @sayruq @rooh-afza @knownoshamc @the-awkward-reblobber @soft-sunbird @cockworkangels @dannyketch @cramenjoyer @oreobunny2 @fireyfobbitmedicine @muminshoom @thedigitalbard @timogsilangan @tboynut @wildfeather5002 @fancy-feast-official @honeytonedhottie @cheloneuniverse @roseillith @thelastharbinger

[oathkeeper-of-tarth]

So, I'm curious: What's your take on Aylin's experience after/if she kills Lorroakan?

Allegedly, there's some information floating around somewhere that said Aylin was angry with Selune after she killed Lorroakan, but I can't find where this info is.

If you saw posts about that here on tumblr it was probably posted by @justanotherignot! I've actually been meaning to gather up all the devnote tidbits about Selûne from Aylin and Isobel for a while now, so thank you for the excuse to do so and ramble a bit.

Player: I was just wondering what it was like in that cage of Balthazar's. Aylin: Let us not dwell on those dark days. Their memory is a vortex within my heart that leads directly to the Hells.

What is happening is, well, it's the century of unthinkable horror catching up to her. It's the Trauma(TM) - in one of the conversation options she's literally triggered by the mention of someone being run through repeatedly! It's the growing awareness that although she's been freed (and possibly reunited with her love), the secret is out and there are always going to be assholes gunning for her, aiming to use her as an "artefact" and power source to fuel their ambitions, without any regard for her, you know... basic personhood and well-being. Also, Lorroakan was blatantly lying. He didn't find any super special way to siphon her immortality with "no harm, no pain of any kind", he was just replicating Balthazar's soul cage (you can even find a letter from Ketheric to him, showing Lorroakan was pestering them).

On to the stuff from the game files! First, the conversation with Aylin directly after the Lorroakan fight in the tower. I'm going to be putting the context notes in square brackets next to the lines they apply to. I also plucked some audio out from the files for some of these because I love the delivery.

Aylin: The fire-haired fool is dead. Yet as I stare upon his corpse, I feel… sadness. Why? [Slow and curious, angry and confused by all that has happened.] Player: What kind of sadness is it? / I know something of sadness - or at least the ballads do. What does it feel like? Aylin: A gripping in the chest. As though I'd lost someone, something. [Lost in thought for a moment; confused.] Aylin: A paladin's fatigue, no doubt. You were excellent in battle, as is your way. And I am proud to fight at your side. [Remembering herself. She is Dame Aylin.] Aylin: I will catch my breath, then to camp I will bring my bones. Moonmaiden be with you. Player: Smiting is a weighty duty - sometimes it can be tiring. / Perhaps smiting has lost its pleasures. Aylin: Say it can't be so. For I am Selûne's sword. And ever must be. [She means it, but on the periphery of her consciousness is a tiny crack. Wondering about her fate.]

The above never fails to get me - she is Dame Aylin! Sword of the Moonmaiden! Glorious immortal paladin, champion of a righteous cause! She smites evil-doers for breakfast, that's, like, her whole thing! What do you mean she can't just pick up where she left off and go about her merry smitey way? What do you mean the thing that is supposed to be the literal core of her entire being (forever) doesn't feel good and glorious anymore, but just makes her feel sad and empty? No, no, no, we can't have that.

Player: One of the greatest tragedies of revenge is that it can only be taken once. / Because you won't get to kill him again? Aylin: Perhaps. Yet if I could run him through a thousand times, I wonder-- [Lost in thought, she's been triggered to remember her own fate being run through over and over.] Aylin: Battle has tired my mind, made me susceptible to flights of fancy. You were excellent in battle, as is your way. And I am proud to fight at your side.

Aylin: I will return to camp shortly. I just need a moment to… to… [Lost in thought.]

She so very desperately needs some rest and a chance to come to terms with everything that happened and that was done to her. And it's clear it's going to be hard because she is defaulting to trying to deny anything is wrong, is clearly trying (and failing) to just be her old self immediately, has blatantly internalised a lot of that classic I Am A Sword stuff on top of everything (even though her mother is huge on free will and choice!), and is just really not well-equipped to handle any of this at all.

Next, this is the post-Lorroakan convo you get if you have both Aylin and Isobel in camp.

Aylin: Ah. Ally mine. We are reunited once more. [Warm, but drained. She's not feeling like herself.] Aylin: I was just regaling sweet Isobel with tales of our prowess. Isobel: Very impressive. Thank you for helping Aylin - that wizard sounded absolutely dastardly. [Good humored. Soft in tone. A little uncertain - she's not sure why Aylin isn't herself.] Player: My pleasure. He had it coming. Aylin: He did, and it came. Now, my friend: bask in your victory. I will do the same. Aylin: But fear not: when the time comes for you to face the foe of foes, Isobel and I will stand by your side. [Rallying her soldierly spirit, but still a little drained.] Isobel: We wouldn't miss it. Not for anything. Aylin: Go well, friend. We will see you soon. And with our great powers combined, this city will be saved. Player: Hopefully he'll be the last. Aylin: There are always more bastards behind bastards. But we will run through them all, each by each.

Player: I hope you can rest easy now, Dame Aylin. Aylin: I always do, with darling Isobel by my side. Aylin: Enjoy the spoils of your victory. Spin memories of Lorroakan's death in your mind like silkfloss.

If Isobel isn't there (meaning she died in Act 2), you get this version:

Aylin: Ah. Ally mine. We are reunited once more. [Warm, but drained. She's not feeling like herself.] Aylin: I was just reviewing our fight against foul Lorroakan; your moves and mine. The victory was soundly won. Aylin: Don't you think? [Uncharacteristically, Aylin is seeking input. She's usually so confident about everything, but killing Lorroakan has not had the intended effect on her.] Player: Indeed I do. Let his demise serve as a warning to anyone else who'd seek you out. Aylin: Let him be the last. If my dear mother has any mercy, she will ensure it. [Trying to stay her usual self, but her mask is cracking a tiny bit here. Privately, Aylin is dealing with a great deal of anger toward her mother, the goddess Selûne, But she's not yet willing to face it. How could her powerful mother let all this happen to her?]

Player: We fought well - though I was a little worried about you afterward, in truth. Aylin: Set your mind at ease, my friend. Dame Aylin is more well now than she has been this past century. [Good humored. Soft in tone. A little uncertain - it's true she's better now than she has been, but why does she feel so shitty, then? (She's in the beginning of reckoning with the trauma of what happened to her).]

Player: I hope you can rest easy now, Dame Aylin. Aylin: Yes. I wish for the very same. Aylin: Enjoy the spoils of your victory. Spin memories of our prowess in your mind like silkfloss.

So, a few things pop out for me here. First, you get the more explicit anger at Selûne if Isobel isn't there, as opposed to the "hahah, I will smite all the bastards who dare come after me, no matter how many there are" line. "How could her powerful mother let all this happen to her?" just... damn, hits hard, even if you subscribe to the theory that Selûne simply could not intervene in the Shadowfell imprisonment beyond sending those poor people whose graves you find in front of the mausoleum.

And here Aylin really lays it on thick with the denial that there's anything wrong at all. Combined with the letter you get from her in the epilogue if Isobel is dead, it just paints such a bleak, sad picture. I can just see her going all out on the Sword of Selûne duty-bound paladin side of things, no rest, no healing, no stopping even for a moment, no dealing with anything at all, from the trauma to the bitterness towards mum. Until whatever horrible breaking point comes, a year or a century from now. The need for Isobel's humanising influence is so clear. I've touched on Isobel's side of things here.

Speaking of having a bone to pick with Selûne, if you're playing as a cleric/paladin of Selûne, you can get some extra very honest dialogue with Isobel in Last Light:

Player: Why has the Moonmaiden waited until now to take an interest in this curse? Isobel: Maybe she was waiting for one of us to find this place ourselves. Free will, and all that.

Isobel: Though if it were my place to ask why she let Ketheric turn; why she allowed this village to rot at his hands - believe me, I would. [A cold edge in her voice]

Player: Are you faring all right? It can't be easy holding a lone candle in such darkness. Isobel: All things with her strength. You know the litany. [A little sarcastically. She's got a bone to pick with Selûne but isn't being too overt.]

Side note: the amount of devnotes for Isobel's lines that say she's delivering them "with swagger" and being "cheeky" makes me smile every time. Love her. Love her snark.

Also, to get it out of the way: no, I'm fairly sure Aylin did not break her oath. I see this brought up a ton and I just see no way for it to be the case. There is nothing to suggest this outside of a wording similarity and it just makes no sense. Girl is clearly some flavour of Oath of Vengeance (she uses Abjure Enemy, so this is the case even mechanically, even though she's obviously an NPC and not a standard player-build paladin) and she killed a very shitty guy who was also explicitly after her in godawful ways. You can do far worse things in the game than her dramatic speech and backbreaker and not break your OoV.

[princessofgotham777]

Dating Jason Todd (Part One)

fanfic type: angst, fluff, comfort (ongoing)

If you liked the Titans show but wish they handled Jason’s story line differently you might like this fic!

Hey so this is in fact my first time writing fanfiction (idk what my life has come to). Sorry if it’s cringy but also I would eat this up cause I LOVE some good angsty comfort fanfiction. I won’t write smut. I don’t think I’m gonna do requests but if you have any ideas feel free to let me know. Also of course I don’t own any DC characters this is purely fanfiction. Although I’ve had tumblr for a bit I’m not really used to posting stuff so sorry if I don’t format everything well. Thank you and I hope you enjoy. (I hope you like run-on sentences💀) (if you don’t like it don’t be rude just move on dude😃🧍‍♀️) also pls excuse my grammar.

So story line, this doesn’t really take place in any specific universe but I’m gonna be pulling concepts from Titans, The Batman, Under the Red Hood, and whatever lore I remember from the CW shows cause I grew up watching those, then just my imagination of course. The beginning takes place when Jason is still Robin but he’s no longer apart of the titans. Reader is referred to as she/her btw.

Warnings: talking about death, suicide, depression, torture (it’s not graphic I hate gore it’s just sad)

Part One: Back To The Tower

“Babe? Babe!” You opened your eyes at the sound of Jason’s voice. His green eyes normally looked at you with gentleness but currently they were alarmed. Scared and scary are two things Jason normally does a good job at keeping separate, but when someone threatens his whole world the two merge to create someone dangerous to everyone, including himself.

“What’s going on? Are you okay?” You asked.

“We’ve got to go, Dick called… he thinks joker is after me for some reason…I’ll explain more on our way to the tower.” Jason quickly grabbed the go bags you two had made in case something like this were to happen. He used to think having go bags was you two being paranoid but you always knew dating a vigilante would have its ups and downs.

You knew he was serious when he walked straight past his bike and headed to your car instead “Jason, slow down,” you said as he swerved around cars. He knew you hated speeding and he so he never dared do it, also because he liked not dying in a car crash.

“I’m sorry, so you know how joker has been leaving notes around Gotham?” He asks as he drives a bit slower.

“Yeah why?” You answer quickly.

“Dick called me two hours ago and said they think they’re threatens to Robin, threats to me.”

“Shit, what does joker even want with you?”

“I have no idea maybe I’m a pawn in some game he’s got going with Bruce or Dick or the titans or maybe he’s just decided I’m the next victim in his reign of fucking torment,” Jason’s voice shook slightly. You could tell he was trying to keep it together while driving; trying to keep it together infront of you. You two had been through so much together: he’d been the one you turned to when you left home, you two had been apart of titans together, he’d rescued you from poison ivy once, you talked him off the roof of the tower. You two knew each other better than you knew yourselves. Even after everything he still had a hard time voicing his emotions and honestly you did too.

“Why’d you change the fucking password asshole,” Jason said to Dick through the security camera at titans tower.

“More importantly why’d he change it and not tell us?” You said. Jason’s arm was around you, his leather jacket was a familiar feeling against your skin.

The tower brought back many memories for both you and Jason. You remembered painting your nails with Rachel while Gar and Jason tried not to burn down the kitchen. Late nights when you’d find Kori or Donna and ask for their advice when you first noticed yourself falling for Jason. They thought you were crazy of course but it all worked out, so far anyway. You remembered the first time you’d been to the tower when Dick took you in. Dick introduced you to the titans but it was Jason, who you only knew as Robin at the time, who saved your life and called Dick. Another memory you unfortunately recalled was the time after you guys got Jason back from Deathstroke. You hadn’t known pain till you saw the way he winced at the slightest touch or loud noise. Then there was his fall…your mind refocused when you saw Dick.

“Hey lovebirds,” he said with a grin.

“So what do these messages say exactly,” you said.

“Always so serious,” Dick says. You simply glare at him and he stops messing around. “Right so over the past few days there have been notes around Gotham in seemingly random places, each one is just some nonsense about circuses and birds so naturally it’s about Robin. They talk about the flying boy and encounters him and I have had he then goes on to talk about me becoming nightwing. The rest is disturbing stuff about him “wanting to pick off the feathers of the new little bird to reveal the horror inside”,”.

“Right…so seemingly random places?” Jason says.

“Yeah so, the first was found spraypainted on the stage of a highschool in Gotham, the next was spray painted on a random wall in an alley and the third was on the door of this bar…” Dick said.

“Shit,” Jason said.

“The highschool and the alley,” you said softly to Jason.

“And the bar… it’s the one my uncle took me to,”

“Someone wanna explain the significance to me,” Dick said.

“They’re places from my past,” Jason said. “The highschool I lived in, the alley I boosted the Batmobile in and the bar my uncle took me to.” You all simply stared at eachother waiting for someone to break the silence when Rachel, Gar and Kori came rushing in.

“Oh my God what are you doing here?” Rachel asked pulling you in for a hug.

“Wish I could say just to see you,” you say.

“Hey man what’s the special occasion?” Gar asks Jason.

“Unfortunately the occasion is another psycho trying to kill me,” Jason replied.

“Wait is that true? Dick is this about the joker?” Rachel asks. Dick looks at Jason who nods.

“Yes, we think joker knows Jason is the new Robin and is threatening him,” Dick says.

“No offense but isn’t this more Batman’s territory?” Kori says.

“Normally yes but he’s off doing Justice League bullshit,” Dick says.

Everyone gets comfortable and Dick explains what we know.

“So we know the notes reference Dick, Bruce and Jason but I think there’s a fourth person here,” Kori says.

“Is joker just referencing himself?” Gar says.

“I don’t think so cause…” Jason stops himself.

“Cause what?” You ask him. He doesn’t answer.

“Jason what is it what’d you find” Dick asks. Jason simply gets up and starts to walk away. Naturally you get up and begin walking after him.

Dick grabs your arm, you glare at him and he lets go, “hey let me go see what’s up just keep picking apart the notes with the others.” It was the Dick you knew, loved, and were annoyed by. The camp counselor anything is possible with teamwork Dick Grayson, the version of him which would soon have to step aside.

“Jason!” Dick says when he finds Jason in his old room which looks exactly the same. Jason doesn’t reply he simply grabs a bag and starts packing. “Going somewhere?” Dick says. Jason still doesn’t reply. “Hey, what the fuck!”

“You aren’t stupid Dick you read the fucking note,” Jason says.

“Maybe I am stupid cause I have no fucking idea what you’re talking about.”

“Jokers not threatening me, he’s challenging me…telling me to meet him. And he’s threatening y/n saying what he’ll do if I don’t go find him.” Jason says.

“Shit,” Dick says. “Okay but all you’re going to accomplish by going by yourself is pissing me off, getting your shit rocked by joker, pissing Bruce off, and scaring your girlfriend to death all of which I’m gonna have to fix so could you not be impulsive for once!”

“You don’t think she’s already scared!” Jason says.

“Yeah I do but I think you’ll make it worse if you leave her here,”

“She’d be safer here far away from Gotham and far away from me,” Jason says.

“Hey dipshits,” Kori says as she turns the corner. “Yeah I can read too,” she also seemed to have figured out the note “So why don’t you I don’t know, include her in the conversation about what to do about the threats that are against her?”

The three of them return to see you, Gar and Rachel sitting in silence, it was clear you guys had also figured out the full message. Jason doesn’t get a chance to even fully enter the room before you get up and pull him back into his old room.

“What were you thinking not telling me?” You say.

“You didn’t sign up for this shit,” Jason says.

“I did, and I don’t just mean with you I joined titans before I even knew your name.”

Jason hesitates before saying, “you’re right, I’m sorry”

“Apology accepted so what the hell are we gonna do,” you say slipping out of your serious tone.

“First question, do you wanna go out there and work with everyone or just keep this between us,” Jason says.

“What do you wanna do?” You asked. It was clear you wanted to include the titans in the plan. You knew Jason has a complicated past with everyone in the other room but you also knew despite his own feelings he’d do whatever would keep you the safest. He hugs you softly, one last act of humanity before completely focusing on being Robin. You and Jason were fairly new to the world of having a secret identity. You both tried to keep the two personas completely separate but at the end of the day the person under the mask always has the final say when hard decisions need to be made.

The plan everyone agreed on was simple. You’d stay at the tower, with Gar and Rachel far away from Gotham and the joker. Tomorrow morning Jason, Dick and Kori would drive to Gotham and work with Barbra to catch joker. If only that were actually how it went.

You’d fallen asleep in your old room with Jason by your side, around three am you woke up and he was no where to be found. “Jason?” You said as you looked around the room. The light was already on so you could see perfectly that he was gone. Jason must’ve turned the light on when he left, he knows you hate being in the dark alone after what you went through with Poison Ivy. “Dick!” You yelled as you ran down the hall to Dick’s room. To your surprise Dick was wide awake busy on his computer.

“Y/N, what’s going on?” Dick said concerned.

“Jason’s gone.” You said.

“Fucking idiot,” Dick mumbled under his breath. He began typing quickly on his computer. “He got rid of his tracker didn’t he?”

“He cut it out ages ago,” you said frantically. Jason had vanished but both you and Dick knew exactly where he was going; he was going to face Joker alone in Gotham.

Please like if you enjoyed the fic I need to know people like it otherwise I’ll stop posting new parts (I have a whole storyline idea and backstory so like if you want to see more)🩷

Here’s my Masterlist so you can read the other parts.

Masterlist

[hyog-blog]

Fangs of Fortune (ep. 06 - ep. 07)

Uh, not Li Lun, out of all people, making everyone finally question why Zhu Yan actually killed Yichen's brother and all those people years ago. We know he lost control over his malicious energy, but why didn't anyone ask him why it happened? Come on, people, you seem to be so smart))

Well, Wen Xiao seems to be accepting enough to not care about what our gorgeous Demon Lord has done in the past, which is quite refreshing. Ambiguous, morally grey characters need more unconditional love (especially when they're, uh, 34,000 years old? XD). But he doesn't even seem to be so 'grey' at this point - he's doing too many good things right now.

The whole thing with being a 'vessel for malicious energy' is quite intriguing. Was he born like that? Can he actually stop 'the cycle of rebirth'? Why did he 'lose control' after so many years of cultivation? I'm also trying to figure out the timeline - the killings must have happened after he dropped Wen Xiao off at what seemed to be the gates to the demon-hunting bureau. But she wasn't staying there when that stuff happened? Did his demonic self come back there just to wreak havoc or for some other reason? Was Li Lun involved? Mmmm, the plot is deliciously mysterious, I will have to wait to get those answers.

Also, I can't even be angry with Li Lun at this point, although he's playing the bad guy now - the poor baby was so visibly hurt when Zhu Yan called him a scumbag. And that painful look he had when our Demon Lord thought something along the lines 'screw you, I know how to wake this boy up from his nightmare' and pierced himself with Yichen's sword (which, uh, seems to be quite a recurring motif and the symbolism of it isn't escaping me, nope XD). In the world of jianghu, the next best thing you can do to show you CARE apart from cutting sleeves is to stab (or get stabbed by) the person you care about. Or get stabbed FOR the person you care about.

I also love how effortlessly Yichen is third-wheeling without creating a feeling that he's actually third-wheeling XD Wen Xiao is obviously biased towards Zhu Yan, now even more so that she knows he IS that Great Demon who accompanied her and the Bai Ze Goddess all those years ago. I would totally trust him, too, if I were her. I also love the messed-up dynamic of a former caretaker/child who's grown up because now Zhu Yan definitely doesn't give us those parental vibes, he's oozing sensuality wherever he goes (and him pretending to be all hurt so she stays with him, ahah, that whole sequence was cute and hilarious). And Zhu Yan saying something along the lines that they now get to 'meet all over again' - was it to build a new relationship with her from scratch? M-hmm, yummy, utterly delicious :D

And you can see how Yichen kinda sorta admits defeat in the way Wen Xiao no longer needs his protection against the 'big bad demon' (the man is using his big bad demonic energy to push her swing, for Christ's sake XD), but still can't let the other man go so easily because of REASONS and that 'you'll have to pay for your sins either way' thing still going on between them. Zhu Yan does know what buttons to push when it comes to Yichen, but the feeling seems to be quite mutual (they're cute together and their interactions are so yummy 😍). That scene at the temple is EVERYTHING. And then at Zhu Yan's mansion with the swing. Is he swinging both ways? Ahah XD For a 34,000-year-old being I don't see how that could be an issue)))

Okay, cutting and piercing still seem to be the show's love language and I APPROVE (never had a kink like that, but there's a first thing for everything, I guess XD). The undertones just make it all so yum))

The introduction of the new character, Yinglei, was hilarious))) We also find out that the Wilderness is crumbling down, which makes the whole Bai Ze token thing even more important.

/and I've finally reached the picture limit in one tumblr post, ahah XD/

[uninformedartist]

So hey long time no see, just popping in to say that this video by Official_TVC is bullshit.

So summary + thoughts:

Video starts off with defintions on different types of stalking & they say Vivienne has experienced all this kind of stalking. Then goes on to say its 2 individuals doing this stalking and they we the viewer doesn't need to know them, Official_TVC has done a lot of research on them and we should should trust Official & their word without evidence because apparently they retweeted something on twitter & it was a tumblr post thats supposedly exposed Vivienne's siblings, personal things ect. All this is hearsay by you, it shouldn't make the average viewer trust your word. Yes I've seen things but that was from posts I've seen.

Aside -honestly Official should be questioning the anon asks we get on here, some of the asks contain some questionable info like how do you get that info. People get asks on here containing info, people don't go out & hunt all Vivienne's private life, we receive stuff thats how things come to light, OTHER PEOPLE SEND US STUFF.

All the background of the video is helluva boss/hazbin scenes coupled with music from respective shows. No evidence, not even heavily censored evidence to protect Vivienne, just Official_TVC talking & basically saying "trust me bro I did research, believe me". This is heinous accusations, individuals you are talking about & you give nothing. It could be lies for all people know, I don't even believe & I've seen the things you're referring to.

Continued, the stalkers, the 1st one is a "troll" according to Official_TVC & the second is supposedly so bad they were quote " has been 15 ft from vivziepop", no backing on that 15ft statement, Official_TVC just states this. All this stalking, entire pages made is because of a ship. Leaking show stuff (aside again, is GIVEN TO US VIA ANONYMOUS ASKS).

They carry on to say essentially all this hate talk on Viv on YT is cos she's popular, they got nothing of meaning to say on Viv cos they hate her so much they can't talk about her positively. They then mention a person has a never ending stream that just feeds misinformation other YouTubers & quote "on the precipice of wanting to strangle a woman (Viv) who made the crime of making demons gay". Wtf does that mean, who has this never ending stream of feeding misinformation to other YouTube, who & wtf are you talking about.

Anyway, goes on to compare spindlehorse workplace allegations to Amazon (yes ironic) & how Amazon treats its workers really bad... do I need to say more. Goes on to say everyone ragged on Viv because hazbin hotel is on Amazon, Amazon is bad & quote by Official_TVC is cos "everyone looks for an excuse to hate". Ok now I'm giving evidence on why people ragged on Viv for prime since you give jackshit.

Amazon/prime is currently being boycotted, its on the bds list why people were saying to pirate hazbin. Not some bullshit reason Official gave on it being mindless hate. Here is a video explaining why people are boycotting Amazon:

Vivienne also like this post from a fan, do I need to spell out how fucking disgusting this tweet is and the fact that she liked it.

Official carrys on to say stalker 1 did 3 things, doxxed Vivienne, & in their words if you go to said person's page Official states "im pretty sure they know where vivziepop lives". That is speculation, thats your opinion cos no evidence is provided or can be for that matter cos this is what YOU think. Dropping as Official says "nuggets" of info on Viv's siblings University, their work (this info was from a sibling's linked in page, public info). Can I say aside, I know her sibling's names. Why, not from stalking but from them leaving comments on Viv's speeddraws and Viv publicly naming them on her PUBLIC socials. And if you know someone's name you can easily find out what uni they went to, if you know my name & search me up you know what uni I go to its in the public on their linked in, social posts ect.

They go on to talk about how terrible leaking Viv's shows are, which idgaf. Amazon is a zionist corporation I'm pirating anything of Vivienne. Even invincible which I love, pirated it. Fans should too (since I see a lot of fans with free palastine in bio but still pay for prime). Anyway thats on them.

TW: talks of sexual harassment. So Official doesn't want to give more info on this individual which I respect & understand. However they say stalker 1 is sexually harrassing this person, sending content of a sexual nature all because the victim in this situation didn't agree with stalker 1 on the stalker's sentiments on hazbin hotel. I understand protecting the victim but my soul you're literally protecting the perpetrator. Expose them, you keep staying stalker 1 & 2 CALL THEM OUT. Protect the victims but expose the perpetrators.

They go on to stalker 2, who know stalker 1. Stalker 2 supposedly went to the hazbin premiere. They were there to keep an eye on vivziepop Official quotes. No evidence of this quote or info just them relaying it. Again this is all your words against what. Yeah that is concerning it really is but substantiate this evidence & quotes. This is the 1st time I'm hearing about this so I would like to know more on this & this heinous person. But you don't give any evidence. Official says " these people need to be stopped", how can they be stopped. You give no names, no info or evidence, its wishful thinking you saying this. I'm harping on and on on about Official gives no evidence but its so flipping frustrating hearing them spout all this WITH NOTHING to back their words.

TW again: Mentions of suicide and Shay a fan bullied by the fandom who then took their own life. Know a lot of people are still saddened by what led to Shay's passing why I mention this.

Official says stalker 1 is using the death of Shay to entice fruther harrassed on Vivienne. Its "apparently now", huskerdust fans went after Shay with heinous harassment & Shay subsequently ended their life, may they rest in peace. Official claims stalker 1 says Vivziepop is directly responsible for Shay's death. Shay's death was worded as "apparently" but stalker 1 using Shay's death to pin it on Vivziepop is stated as a fact. How disgusting can you be someone died & its apparently so to you but your word of mouth should be considered fact, fuck off. Official then goes on to say... sighs quote "we do not hold politicians accountable when they massacre people of other countries... bloodlines don't exist but we don't blame the politicians pushing the buttons".

Ok wtf, yes we do we blame Biden & other politicians & presidents for pushing the figurative & literally buttons on massacring Palestinians & other minorities, WE DO so wtf are you talking about. I honestly hate Official at this point because wtf are they saying. I don't blame vivziepop on Shay's death, even though when there was attempts to reach Vivienne on what was happening to Shay, maybe the channels they used like email didn't get the message across unfortunately. What I absolutely hate is when fans, like official now use Shay's death as a pawn in relation to people hating on Viv. No one that I've see & I'm saying it now I know who these stalker 1 & 2 are not even they were as disgusting as Official & fans to use Shay's death as to further hate on Vivienne. What Official_TVC is saying is bullshit.

And I disregard everything Official_TVC says after they hearted this comment, fuck you Official_TVC for hearting this vile comment.

I link a screenshot of the outreach to Vivienne via email on Shay aswell as the document on Shay's.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vSfCoyn81fp83pycx5eyS4oxryRpFnVnHdEeyEyouigrKSWAZ5iEgTjt7Q63n68S_PcZK7_klB-9dH1/pub

In all this video is a load of nothing, bullshit actually & just vile on the parts of Shay. They ended of once again reiterating they won't give proof because people just want names & evidence for the tea/gossip & they want to protect Vivienne, shoo shoo. Again trust me bro, I did the research so trust me.

I want to reiterate I condone no actions if provided true on stalker 1 or 2. But from what I've seen of them is all out of context, lies spread by the fandom & things just made up down the grapevine. I don't do this for likes, clout or other bullshit the fandom says. Wouldn't be of me on my nature and the work that I do. Come with substantial evidence, then we discuss & make conclusions but for now

...

I hate Vivienne and this fandom, bye all.

[maddy-k-reads-all-day]

Thinking about Wooly in When You Feel Bad

Okay so like... everyone noticed that Wooly was acting kind of funny in the "When You Feel Bad" Tape right? Here's some things I noticed... just note there is a LOT of detail put into this tape so I'm definitely not going to be able to notice and cover everything... I don't even think a post that long would fit in the tumblr text limit...

Anyway first thing I noticed is that right after he says, "How about an Adventure?" he looks directly at the camera. Everything about how he says this feels very scripted. But the interesting thing is... his face immediately changes to one of nervousness or unease as soon as his finishes this sentence and his eyes slowly turn in her direction, BEFORE Amanda even says anything. Almost like he knows that this is not what Amanda wants or needs right now, so it's gonna piss her off. However, it's probably what the SHOW needs, in order for the episode to continue.

Before I continue, I'd like to share a little theory. I think the narrator's story might actually be the correct scripted one the episode was meant to read. Hameln does enjoy subtle but slightly harmful messaging, and telling a friend a sad story to cheer them up might be one of them. I think Wooly was supposed to start the story and the narrator was supposed to continue it (with our help). Because otherwise, why would the narrator be there at all if Wooly was supposed to tell the story? If that's the case, why isn't our script-loving Wooly following the script?

I have two theories:

1. First off, if you answer "tragedy" or "sad" for your favorite type of story, Wooly glances at Amanda (who doesn't appear to be paying attention) and says "We don't like those kinds of stories AT ALL." But... this is lie. We know Amanda likes these stories. So that means... the one who really doesn't like them is Wooly. His reaction to horror also implies that he has some of the trademark Hameln trauma too, though he doesn't seem to show it as much as Amanda. It's kind of a weird reaction to have honestly... like, why would the mention of the word "horror" give you flashbacks of... whatever THAT was. I've had this theory for a while now that part of the reason Wooly tries to change the subject when Amanda talks about sad stuff might simply be because HE doesn't like talking/thinking about this kind of stuff. When we answer "horror" he says he wishes he hadn't asked. In comparison, whenever Amanda remembers something about her past, like when we first mentioned Sam, she seemed confused and maybe a little suspicious of us, but she never flat out has said she regrets remembering these memories, despite how unpleasant they can be. It's a weird contrast. Almost like Amanda wants to remember and Wooly wants to forget. And he really doesn't seem to like listening to the narrator's story when it's told. It's almost like he was trying to avoid it getting told at all. In this case, it was never about cheering Amanda up and Wooly was being rather selfish here. So in order to prevent the narrator's story from getting told, he tells his own.

Which could explain why it's so bland and uncreative, considering Amanda (even in this episode alone) is shown to be the creative type of the two. She's an artist. We've never seen Wooly try and be creative before, so maybe it's just not his thing?

Another interesting thing is, Amanda goes off script quite often and the show seems to bend to her will, but for Wooly it doesn't. (in both this tape and the second In Your Neighborhood tape). It's almost like Amanda seems to get rewarded for going off script (aka in getting what she wants) and Wooly gets punished for it. But it always works for which might be why Wooly is surprised when the same doesn't work for him. But he continues to try nonetheless, trying to get HIS story back on track.

He continues to tell the story wrong ON purpose. Probably hoping he can get the show to play along, the way it always does for Amanda. But it FAILS again. Wooly starts to get frustrated and eventually realizes we're the ones messing with his story. When he asks us to at least TRY and go along with his story, he sounds annoyed which we don't get often from Wooly. So anyway that's theory 1.

Theory 2 goes a bit deeper.

To preface this, I don't 100% believe in this theory I could be wrong but I just want to put the idea on the table. It started with this detail I noticed and found REALLY interesting.

When the narrator says "the knight slew the dragon, not knowing they were killing their true love" Wooly looks at his hands with this weird, wide-eyed expression, while Amanda says the knight is going to regret that.

I've always thought his reaction here was a little strange. Like it didn't make sense. But what if this line is implying something about Wooly? I do think that this story is a metaphor for something, but it isn't a word-for-word representation of what happened. It is simply a SAD STORY to cheer Amanda up. But bits and pieces of it may remind Amanda and Wooly both of events that happened in their life. Amanda might relate to being separated from someone she cares about and to being turned into a monster (in her case, the demon) without her consent. But Wooly might relate to other things. For this scene in particular maybe he hurt someone he really cared about in a way he couldn't take back and really regrets that? (like the knight killing their true love, killing someone is something that cannot be undone). Once again, I don't think it's supposed to be a one-to-one thing. This line could even be hinting at Amanda and Wooly's falling out. Amanda tells us in the final tape that Wooly did something to betray her trust. Wooly and Amanda used to be best friends. So maybe Wooly did something that really hurt Amanda, something that could not be taken back. Something that ultimately made him lose his best friend and he regrets that. In multiple scenes in this series, Wooly seems to look sad or guilty when Amanda shows anger towards him or says they aren't friends anymore. So it's very possible that this is the case. That said, another common theme with Wooly is that he doesn't seem to enjoy looking at or talking about subjects that make him uncomfortable. (When Amanda talks about death, he seems extremely uncomfortable, when they watch the cat eat the bird he says he feels like he's going to be sick and his constant changing the subject routine that happens throughout the series). So this story, that might in some way remind him of a mistake he made might be something he doesn't want to hear. He doesn't want to be reminded that he screwed up in a way he can't take back, he doesn't want to hear it.

Side note, when Wooly suggests that finishing the story might cheer her up, she doesn't object, she sits back down and looks at him (albeit still pretty upset) and waits for him to continue.

As the narrator's story continues Wooly starts to seem really angry about it. And then he starts getting really like emotionally bent out of shape. Then there's the whole, "There was a big battle, the brave knight prevailed and then-" and Wooly stops, once again having this weird look on his face. Like this got too personal.

Wooly goes on to talk about how the Knight saves the princess and they live happily ever after.

I think this could imply that at one point or another, Wooly had some sort of chance to do something to help Amanda or save her from her fate. A chance he didn't take. Maybe this didn't even happen while they were trapped, but beforehand and Amanda found out later and got reasonably upset. In any case, it does feel like Wooly may be projecting to an extent. Maybe even trying to subtly tell Amanda that he's sorry, and he doesn't like how their story went. Something that Amanda clearly didn't pick up on. This would be interesting since it's not the first time the game or it's characters have tried to tell us something subtly through a story. Amanda did it through the lonely kitten and the farm animals. I'm not 100% sure that's what is going on here, but I am acknowledging the possibility. Regardless of what Wooly was trying to do, the true ending to this is that he fails.

Going off that theory, something else that add to this is the annoyance Wooly expresses when Amanda dislikes his story. He knows this isn't the story she likes, but if he were trying to tell her something with it, it'd be pretty annoying if he felt like she was ignoring that message. As Amanda keeps criticizing Wooly's story, Wooly claims he's doing his best to cheer her up. Which is a lie. This whole "I'm going to tell my own story" is incredibly selfish and misguided on Wooly's part. Amanda clearly isn't getting the point or liking the story. Even if Wooly was trying to hide some apology in this story, it still doesn't make it okay for him to activitely ignore Amanda's feelings. Besides, even if he is trying to apologize, the apology itself probably comes off a bit mockingly? Like... "I wish our lives didn't completely suck, I wish I had done something about it when I had the chance. But I'll never actually say it to your face." Another thing- Wooly clearly seems to feel genuninely bad about whatever he did to Amanda- but he has never even TRIED to apologize to her!!!

Amanda asking "why doesn't the dragon just put her out of her misery?" I think this adds to my other theory that Amanda just wants to be out of here. She wants to bring an end to what feels like an endless nightmare.

Idk if this post makes ANY sense and like there are so many more details that I could uncover I just wanted to share these two little theories. I do actually really like the idea that Wooly might actually be trying to hint at an apology in changing the sad story to a happy one but I'm probably thinking too deeply about this. Anyway I just wanted to share my thoughts! Hope you enjoy!

Bonus:

But I thought Wooly says he doesn't like scary stuff? I mean it's just a dragon so it isn't really scary but this was kinda weird of him right?

Is this a spelling error or is it intentional and somehow important? Genuinely asking.

[blissfulphilospher]

So, I don't know why I am posting this but I had this in my heart since a long time. So, bear with me.

I read Princess and the Queen and Fire and Blood back in 2019, after GoT ended for more content. And I got to know about The Dance from Tumblr, the awesome artists and fanarts.

When I read those books, I felt for Rhaenyra. No I don't have a step mother but Rhaenyra felt alone, like her mother died and her father remarried, her new step mom was first kind and loving but then after a brother all that changed.

I can't blame book Rhaenyra for not having good relationship with her siblings, she was a child, just like them and the world was trying to replace her with them just as her mother had been replaced. (When my brother was born, I felt the same and we don't have the best relationship even now, but you know whose fault is that? Adults. Adults who love to compare and pity siblings against siblings)

Why Viserys never tried to mend the relationship between his eldest son and daughter? Even Alicent tried. And then Daemon evidently manipulated Rhaenyra more to hate her siblings for his own benefit. He was pushed down in succession. (He should never have been in succession)

Then Rhaenyra grows older, bold and doing as she like, fighting her step mother, beefing with her siblings and people are following her. She is being courted and has freedom in that era.

I liked book Rhaenyra because she seemed ruthless. She wasn't trying to pretend being good, she was ambitious, she was fighting for the throne because her father chose her. Not because of a stupid prophecy. We all know how that ended. She wanted the throne. (I will eat my brother alive if my father chose me for something and not him). She was unhinged.

And I liked that about her. I liked Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen. She was greatly flawed, she offered her brothers for Laenor, she fed a man to her dragon, she hosted a lavish feast in a starving city, she was a woman and let men do the fighting. She was a mother and did everything to protect her children (foolishly though). She faced death with bravery and didn't begged and didn't offered negotiation, didn't ran. A true dragon. Like those menacing cruel dragons?

And then HotD gave us...

1) 'I rather serve as a knight and ride to battle and glory' but she isn't train with swords. If she wants that then why isn't she trained? Was this to appease Arya's fans? Also this message of feminism, 'a woman only cool and worth something when she wants to be like men, Do what men does.' I am not saying this is bad but you are making her a feminist atleast let her appreciate females? Also, again, if she wanted to train with swords then why didn't she? Nobody stopped Visenya and Alyssa, no one would have stopped her.

2) On Aegon's nameday, enough people have said that already, Rhaenyra being mean to her two year old brother and acting like a spoilt child but I want to add this—

Everyone came there for Aegon, hoping Viserys will name him heir. HotD gave us Rhaenyra acting like a brat and then killing a boar and totally projecting her as a protagonist by showing White Hart, and sexy cool asf covered with blood. She could have made alliance, like book Rhaenyra would have mingled with everyone, dressed better than everyone, charming everyone. Not arguing with other ladies and lords.

3) Daemyra. Enough said. I never thought Book Rhaenyra and Book Daemon had any great love story, they were not even written as such. Nah, Rhaenyra desired Criston, tried to seduce him first. Daemon was only using her. He had one healthy relationship in the book and that was with Laena. They both came together because none of them considered Alicent and her children as their family too.

I hate this show for promoting them as some great tragic love. Nah, Rhaenyra needed his protection and Daemon wanted to be closer to the throne. Why didn't they let them be that? How are they going to justify as to why Daemon left Rhaenyra and his son alone to go die along with Aemond?

And if Daemyra is a great tragic love story why they got afraid to show Rhaenyra having Laenor murdered? Because that was the level of her craziness in the books, and that's in the character of Daemyra. That's 'I will do anything to be with you, for you' energy.

Gods, I thought Rhaenyra would be Cersei Lannister level in HotD, cool, snarky, awesome, beautiful, unhinged, fashion icon, doing everything for her children, doing everything for her and not shying away from the person she is, a necessary evil (like feeding Vaemond to Syrax). And incestuous. Of course Jaime x Cersei level of craziness in Daemyra?

In HotD... Emma and Milly did awesome job but their character was bland. Served to us by writers as 'a goody two shoes always right'. 'she can do nothing wrong.'

Why is media afraid of showing what women are? Why can we only be 'goody two shoes, patriarchy bad, I am awesome cause I am not like other girls' in feminist shows? Why can't they women as humans, as grey, ambitious? Why can't woman be anti hero? Rhaenyra is suffering from stereotyped blend of Arya and Dany.

Alicent is a fresh breath in that regard. But I hate the show for stripping away her agency and making her a crybaby. You are showing me that the Queen, who may or not have murdered Viserys, cried for him? That her, who plotted and plotted and led the Greens, crowned her daughter would not want her son to be king?

They even changed the dinner scene, everyone was supposed to make fun of the other party. No heartwarming and Aegon was supposed to fight Jace.

But make two female characters cry over each other, cry over men, abuse them, strip their agency, make the person you are trying to show as protag (she should not even be a protag) blander than water and call it a feminist show.

(HotD should not even be a feminist show, it should have been a family drama show. Imagine my embarrassment when I told my brother that I love Rhaenyra and I am just like her before the show started and by the end I was like ... Wow Aegon Second of His Name, I stan the One True King. Because he, despite they made him a monster is more interesting than Rhaenyra at this point.)

I was robbed. We were robbed of spicy hot pizza and instead given a bland cheese toast.

I refuse to eat bread, give me cake. Cersei, Margaery, Catelyn were cake, Alicent... She is the cookie. (Not adding Sansa because in the end of the show... Book Sansa is pastry.)

At this moment we all most cope. Thank you whoever read this. Also wanted to add, I was Team Woman but I can't stan this Rhaenyra. Nah.