#also portraits my beloved comfort zone

[groan-taire]

And some sidestep era

Sidestep Lucas before the horrors get to him (again) is so baby faced 😭

[personasintro]

ITS ME AGAIN.

2/2

I would like to express my genuine and serious opinion about MH and the relationship between Y/N and JK. Let's start with the fact that this book needs to be reread few times, to understand better the dynamics between the main protagonists. I'm convinced that reading it one time it's NOT enough to understand what's actually happening. MANY and MANY people comment on it about JK seeing Y/N as a fuck buddy at this point, and nothing more. That he will never see her as a potential girlfriend. The first time I have read it, I got really annoyed and frustrated about this slow burn, like many others who write you these annoying asks. I thought that after so many chapters, basically nothing really happened, that he wants her for sex only. HOWEVER, when I started ready it for the second and third time then + read MH JUNGKOOK'S POV, my jaw dropped, because I began seeing and understanding things I never noticed before. My perspective of the situation COMPLETELY CHANGED . Now, I don't know if you study psychology/are interested in it, or if all of this is just a coincidence made up me and my analysing everything habit, but rereading it carefully, we can notice how well, subtle but clear you're trying to portrait the feelings of both of them towards each other. Let me explain it better.

(THIS MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS) Correct me if I'm wrong, but now that my perspective changed, I see MH JK as a guy who basically craves for reciprocated love, cuddles, attention and mostly important, who can't stay single or alone for too long. Not because he's desperate, but because he's a hopeless romantic who likes to give and receive love. The thing is, if in the very beginning I found very annoying his obsession with Kiko, now I think I understand what actually happened. He is attached to her for the good, old memories she brought him. He wants to bring the nice feelings he had back. In which he truly felt loved and understood by someone. But this doesn't mean he needs specifically Kiko. He loves her, is attached to her, but it's not the same as before. Sometimes we want our ex back because we want the good memories with them back and not specifically them now. More specifically, we want their old selves with us because we romanticise the memories a lot, but in reality we don't want to be with the person they are now. Does it make sense?

Why am I so convinced about this? Because of the fuck buddies deal thing. If he truly still loves Kiko and wants nobody else, in his mind NEVER EVER would have blown up the idea of having sex, and more over, REALLY ENJOYING it with his best friend. If someone is THE ONE for you and you're 100% serious about them, you don't act like a freaking husband with your bff. You made very clear his feelings by his actions. His actions and words speak for himself. He's attracted to Y/N right now, mentally and physically. He doesn't have romanticised old memories with her, so this means he's living the moment NOW and the feelings towards her are new. I can't say he's in love yet, because again, if you're in love you don't go to your ex. However, I'm truly convinced that in the last chapters we can absolutely tell he likes her now. Seriously likes her, but still denies it to himself, because he deeply knows that Y/N is his dearest best friend. It would be messy to date her, because this implies ruining the friendship in case something goes wrong and also she is in his main group of friends. Can you imagine breaking up with her and seeing her in your homies circle? And not having her as your beloved best friend anymore ? Hell no. And mostly important, she NEVER explicitly said to him anything about even the slightest possibility to want him a boyfriend. The dude basically automatically suppresses the thoughts about dating her, because unconsciously he knows it's not worthy and that he still receives the love he craves for from Kiko. She's basically the "comfort zone". Why risking to lose it to try dating someone who doesn't guarantee you anything (for now at least) . But objectively speaking, his words and body already behave like they are almost in love. I'm 100% sure that if Y/N confesses now, he would accept right away to date her. He's too whipped for her. Can't say the same about Y/N, who is the less considerate about her own feelings. No, SHE IS, because she overthinks it A LOT, more than him, but she's worse than him in suppressing the feelings for the same reasons. She tries to gaslight herself even when she perfectly knows it , and she literally goes to tue swimming pool.

that's it for now. I have more things, but let's stop here.

-July

HI you again!

This will be nothing new for some readers, especially to those who have been here from the beginning and has read my responses for quite sometime now (you guys can skip this response because you probably know it all by now hehe) ; you're right. I think too that for some people, it might take more reads to understand the little things that are not so obvious. Again, I'm gonna repeat myself but MH is a story where you should read between the lines. Not everything is clear and obvious. There are little easter eggs throughout the story. It causes people trying to get answers directly from me, since they haven't gotten it in the story. But I do not want to spoil anything, I prefer readers knowing the real stuff from the story. Until the story is not finished, I'll keep my mouth shut and enjoy the chaos 😁

I actually did study psychology, had it as a subject in my school and it was my favorite one. I think my writing mirrors me. I do tend to get very deep and analyze certain situations and people. I think that's what's happening in this story as well (and in my other ones too). That's a very good guess you made here!

It is a very interesting take that you have of him and the situations in the story! I cannot confirm nor deny. All I can say is that Jk really did love Kiko. I've seen in my life people that started hooking up with someone else after their break-up. That's how some people cope with it. Or even if they're fine after break-up, mostly men, think of sex a lot. It's a part most of them do not let go. So in this case, I wouldn't exactly say he didn't love her because he came up with the idea of them hooking up. We all know it was way deeper and complicated than this. It's also fine to enjoy the sex with someone that isn't your partner + when you're still heartbroken and love with someone else. He was surprised himself that he truly enjoyed it. But then again, he didn't exactly tell her to have sex. It's something that happened naturally and overtime. It showed off the beginning of their chemistry.

You've made some good points! I truly liked this analyzation (it's one of the best things about writing, to receive long messages/ask with analyzation!!) and I enjoyed reading it very much! I do have to stay neutral though and I hope you understand that 😁 Thank you again for this message/feedback. It was truly fun to read (I did read it the first time when I was on a walk with my dog and I tried not to trip 🫠). I had some cool responses prepared but I forgot them lolol but I think I covered everything I wanted!

Thank you, sending you lots of love and a huge hug, July! 🩵🫶

[eiseryn]

Lei's Birthday 2024 - Gift Shopping

Description: A short story featuring original characters from my cyberpunk campaign in a modern AU. Gigi plans a shopping trip for her best friend Lei's birthday gifts and brings along two of their friends. For some reason, Lei's boyfriend wants to tag along and Gigi isn't sure about how she feels about him with her beloved best friend. In spending a little more time with Vail, maybe Gigi will learn to see what her best friend likes in her man and find a way to support them?

Length: 1.5k words

Characters: Gigi, Vail, (mentioned: Lei, Ceres, Elise)

Relationships: Gigi + Vail (platonic), implied Vail / Lei (romantic)

It was September again. The smell of rain, the crinkly red and yellow leaves, and pumpkin spice lattes being available were all indicative of that. 

And what also came with September was the approaching of Lei’s birthday. Last year, Gigi had thrown a large surprise birthday bash, but this year, Lei’s birthday aligned with the mid autumn festival so Lei had requested something smaller. Who was Gigi to refuse her best friend’s requests? 

So the weekend before Lei’s birthday, which was unfortunately on a weekday, Gigi had called up the girls — which was what she liked to call Elise and Ceres — and planned a gift  shopping day. This was so that none of them would get Lei overlapping gifts. 

That had gone well. Elise efficiently picked up a scented candle and some bath bombs in Lei’s favourite floral scents. Ceres, the cute little thing, had said she already handmade Lei’s gift and simply came to pick up some gift wrap. Only when Gigi pressed and insisted, did Ceres reveal the carefully painted portraits of Cillin and Meng, Lei’s beloved cats. Gigi couldn’t help but pat such a cute girl on the head! 

Gigi herself already knew what she was going to get Lei — it had become a tradition for them to buy each other outfits for their birthdays. Usually they would try to get each other things that were similar to the other’s closet, but this year, Gigi wanted to challenge Lei a little outside of her comfort zone. This year, Gigi had opted for a multi-layered flowy white chiffon dress and a black corset-like pleather belt. Paired with some comfy leather boots and some scarves, it would have Lei looking like a pirate princess. 

Now Gigi herself and the girls all aligned with her expectations and they finished their shopping with relative efficiency. What she did not expect was a particular blue-haired man wanting to tag along.

And thus it lead to her current predicament now: 

“Vail, you could string a few beads on some cooking twine and give Lei that, and she would still call it the best bracelet she’s ever received.” Gigi said, with a dramatic sigh, holding the palm of her hand to her forehead. 

Vail had tagged along to all the shops the girls went to, saying very little as he followed behind them like some lost puppy. But it seemed that he was struggling with choosing what to get Lei for her birthday gift. 

Gigi didn’t have anything in particular against Vail. He was on the short side, had decent-enough facial features that could make him objectively “cute”, and he wasn’t an asshole. Even before he and Lei had officially started dating, Gigi could already tell that he was genuinely interested in Lei. And since Lei and him had been dating for some time now, Gigi could tell he made her happy. Even so, Gigi was not particularly impressed by him. In Gigi’s eyes, Lei deserved someone who would pluck the stars out of the sky for her. 

Gigi and Vail had been in the jewelry store for the past half hour and even Gigi’s bottomless patience had worn a little thin. Just a little. 

“Maybe,” Vail said, looking up at Gigi from the extensive earring rack he was studying intensely. “But I want to give her something nice.” 

Maybe if you knew what she liked, you wouldn’t be having such a hard time deciding, Gigi thought in her head, but didn’t say. 

Instead, Gigi sighed. “Why can’t you be like other guys and slap a ribbon on your crotch and call it a day?”

Vail made no indication that he had heard her, although Gigi could see that the tips of his ears had grown suspiciously red. 

Flipping her wavy red hair behind her, Gigi turned away from him and began to browse through the jeweled hair clips in the row over. “Well, if you would like my help so we can go home sometime today, I’ll just be over here.”

They browsed in a few minutes of awkward silence before he finally cleared his throat and said. “Do you know anywhere they might sell mooncake earrings?”

Finally! Took you long enough! Gigi screamed in her head. But again, out of manners, she did not say this aloud.

“I know just the place.” Gigi smiled, already beginning to walk out of the store. “Come on, let’s go get some cute earrings.”

The place she had in mind was a little artisan shop that featured small artists. It was a personal favourite of Gigi herself. Just the week before, Lei and Gigi had visited after class and Lei had actually picked up the mooncake earrings that Gigi was now recommending to Vail. 

Perhaps he does pay attention to what Lei likes, Gigi was beginning to realize as she promptly showed him the wooden shelf. She pointed at the golden yellow mooncakes, intricately carved with a Chinese character, and hanging from golden hooks. 

He picked up the earrings, and then shook his head and placed them back on the rack. “This won’t do.” He said. “She only wears silver.” 

That was something Gigi occasionally forgot herself until Lei mentioned it. Gigi was surprised that he even remembered.

After her initial shock, she straightened herself up and cleared her throat to say, “Hmmm I’ll ask one of the employees if they have any left in silver. I think there were some last week.” 

The employee was called over and after explaining the situation, the employee gestured to a hidden drawer underneath the display. After digging through it, the employee pulled out a pair of earrings on a cute red backing card.

The earrings were depicting white snowskin mooncakes and placed on silver hooks. The red backing card even had the design of a very round white bunny on it. 

“That looks great, thanks.” Vail said as the employee dropped the earrings in his hand. 

“Wasn’t so hard now, was it?” Gigi said to Vail with just a little bit of sass, after the employee had left to go back to their post. 

But Vail wasn’t looking at her or listening to her at all. Instead, his attention seemed to be on the glass display case that the employee was behind. Behind the glass, there were shelves of what appeared to be handcrafted rings of different kinds, nestled in velvet beds. 

Gigi placed her hands on her hips and raised her eyebrows. She knew Vail was serious about Lei, but wasn’t aware he was that serious. She watched him, seeing his brown eyes full of longing as he gazed at what was behind the glass. In those eyes, she saw someone who was willing to try to pluck the stars out of the sky for her beloved friend. 

Perhaps she had underestimated him more than once today. Although Gigi hated being wrong, she hated having the wrong idea about people more. 

“Vail?” Gigi said, her booming voice piercing through the quiet of the shop. “Is there something else you wanted to buy today?”

This seemed to shake Vail out of his daze and he shook his head. “Sorry, did you say something before? I didn’t hear it.”

Perhaps it’s not time yet, Gigi thought, but now I can see the future that Lei dreamed of coming true. For now though, Gigi would bide her time and make sure she got as much quality time with her best friend before she was taken away. 

Gigi shook her head, a small smile on her face. “It’s nothing important. I was just wondering if you were ready to go.” 

“Oh, right. Hmmm… I guess I can pick up a second pair of earrings. It seems there’s a deal for two.” Vail said, his gaze returning to Gigi and then the shelf.

“Right…” Gigi smirked at him, her hand firmly placed on her hip. “Well, after you’re done, let’s go find the girls. We’re getting bubble tea. My treat.” 

He looked at her with a puzzled expression. “Nah, it’s okay. Thanks though. I appreciate your help today so if anything, I should be treating you to bubble tea.” 

“Nonsense!” Gigi shook her finger at him. “It’s a tradition when I go out with the girls that someone treats the others to bubble tea. Not only is today my turn, but today you’re an honorary girlie. After all, we all came shopping with the intention of making our darling Lei happy, no?” 

He smiled then, something rare to Gigi, but something that might have been familiar to Lei. Very vaguely, at the back of her mind, did Gigi remember how Lei had swooned about his soft smiles. 

“Alright, you got me. I’ll buy the ingredients for the hotpot then.” Vail said with his small smile. 

“Throw in some prime-grade meats and it’s a deal~” 

Vail seemed to think about it only to humour her — Gigi knew he wasn’t going to refuse — before he nodded and said, “Deal.” 

Delighted, Gigi let out a laugh, which could be heard outside the store as she and Vail shook on it.

Author's Notes:

Gigi / Vail friendship is something I didn't know I needed until now. It's the best friend / boyfriend solidarity in supporting their fave girl

GIGI'S POV IS SO FUN TO WRITE T_T IM SO SAD SHE'S BARELY GOING TO APPEAR IN THE CYBERPUNK VN (I feel like she'd be popular)

sorry this is kinda messy orz I didn't edit that much for once and this is really experimental / for fun

I know it's also super late for Lei's birthday but I've been dealing with other stuff so :'D if I have more motivation to write then I might do part 2 (Ceres POV) + part 3 (Vail POV) for Lei's birthday. There might be Lei POV for part 3 instead of Vail actually who knows 🤪🤷‍♀️

[speakingstories]

My beloved muses, my players' characters. I'm making them pretty character sheets for print and... well, they won't be pretty without a cute portrait.

Also I'm dang proud of where my art is right now. Say whatever you will about comfort zones, I worked dang hard to have one and I'll take advantage of it. I love learning and all, but sometimes it's just nice to say "hey, you know what... I have this idea and I can simply DO IT without doubting about my entire being".

On the other hand, I hope I'll soon be able to GET GOING with the game instead of... making stuff for it. But I'm in vacations and in a good mood and today I feel like sometime soon enough I'll be as confident as a GMing as I am right now with my art.

[chen-chen-chen-again-chen]

WIP Wednesday

Hello hello! Thank you for the tags, @martsonmars, @hushed-chorus, and @artsyunderstudy. As always, I love the glimpses of what you're all working on!! ❤️❤️

I’m still plugging away at my EGF, but today was just backstory notes, so no fun shareable prose from that. I re-listened to AWTWB recently and it gave me a lot of Jamie Feels, so here's another portrait from the Rosethorn girl universe:

He’s a little heavy, but he’s my brother

By Lucy Winifred Salisbury

(Not-quite) Black and white photography

Interview with the subject and the subject’s flatmate, Lachlan MacCionagh (This is for you, @larkral 😆)

A: I already told you, I’m not going to use cleaning spells around the flat. I��d be in heaps of trouble as it is, if anyone found out I told you - 

Q: Jimothy, Jimothy, Jimothy - you didn’t tell me. I found your wand in a pencil cup. 

A: … You shouldn’t just go - rummaging through my things - 

Q: If mages are so dedicated to secrecy, why don’t they make their magic wands look like ordinary objects? Why not make a wand that looks like a fountain pen so that when someone saw it, they’d think, “Oh look, a fountain pen. How commonplace and not at all suspect.”  

A: … 

Q: Jimothy, how many magical objects are hidden around this flat?

A: That’s not - 

Q: Challenge accepted. 

More blather, resolutions, & tags behind the cut, because I’m never going to master the art of writing shortform for Tumblr. 😆

Robot overlords: I’m quite torn about using DALL-E 2 now, because of the discourse on AI-generated art and stolen datasets, but I’m still emotionally attached to the art that was part of brainstorming Rosethorn girl. 

After a lot of wrestling, I decided that I’m still going to share some of my favourite DALL-E 2 generations, but I won’t be generating any new ones. It’s a murky compromise, but that’s where I’m at right now!

My shit lungs: After three weeks, I’m finally, finally getting better and feeling more like myself. I'm still slow and shaky and crawling along at a snail’s pace when it comes to writing, but I’ll take it. 

My head hasn't been in a fandom space at all for the past three weeks, so I'm also excited to dive back into reading fic!! But on the writer side, I am going to continue to be gentle with myself and toss expectations for myself out the window.

Resolutions: Some 2023 resolutions, in no particular order: 

Be content with doing less. 

Prioritise your health & well-being over your productivity. 

Keep having good conversations with people. Keep listening. 

Show up for your beloved people the best that you can. 

Keep doing weird shit and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone, into your growth zone.

Keep doing art that you’re bad at but that you enjoy. 

Say goodbye to old WIPs - finish them, bury them, post them as they are, or otherwise let them go. 

Walk outside more, especially before writing, as your doorway into diffuse mode. 

Remember to do grounding/self-compassion exercises before, during, & after writing difficult things. 

Let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. 

Pressure-free hello tags! @bookish-bogwitch, @cutestkilla, @dohrnaira, @facewithoutheart, @johnwgrey, @larkral, @moodandmist, @nightimedreamersworld, @raenestee, @sailorblossoms, @whogaveyoupermission, @thewholelemon, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

[postapocalypticcatbrat]

art journeys are so strange. the fuckers in my head don't make it any less strange. I've been drawing since i was a kid, just never stopped and now that's what I'm in college for. I'm cleaning my room. I found all my old sketchbooks, i don't remember half any of it nor the order they go in. only some pages have dates. my headmate could ID some late highschool stuff, mainly because that's when we got into a game that genuinely improved our life. our mom (genuinely a shit mom) banned us from fanart back in middle school i think.

but then there's fanart of beloved characters that i still hold dear, yet there's some downright primal fear around those drawings. and it makes me wonder how much did our mom fuck up our art journey. i wonder who remembers how our mom reacted to the fanart of two guys holding hands, the drawing of a demon guy in a dress. there's no more fashion drawings after that.

i graduated highschool the same year i found my favorite video game, a game my mom never knew i adored, i also got into zelda at that time, but my mom knew of that. i was also in ap 2d art at that time. my art teacher said to hide my art style, it was "too anime" in her words. my art looks so stagnant until i started sketching my favorite game's antagonist.

my childhood friend entered my life again after graduating highschool. they got to be the first one to hear about my favorite game and the first to see the first fanart i did of it.

college started and i was in art appreciation, the teacher encumbered me to go into the art department. I'm glad i listened to her.

but before that i had winter break. some traumatic shit happened during it so I'll spare the details, but i used my favorite game as a coping mechanism and drew it to stay calm. even with the bad memories connected to the drawings from then, i still actually like them.

school started back and i entered drawing 1, the teacher is a kind lady, she's from Ukraine, she also teaches printmaking. entering her class was a weird time. my mom got sick, no longer fully controlling me, i just discovered my system (or well, the words for it), the main fucker who deals with school now showed up (I'll call them 'C', they are here alot), and an abusive friendship ended. it was alot.

my time in drawing class had me draw a portrait of soneone by memory, i had chosen that childhood friend. it was the first time in our memories that there was a sense of pride in a portrait. god it was awful looking, but it was them, C was proud of it. i don't they ever showed our friend, oh well.

drawing class was amazing. the teacher still is amazing, we're taking printmaking 2 next semester with her. she encouraged trying new things, framed as "seeing new horizons" rather than "leaving your comfort zone" but she also wanted everyone to do things they liked. we did character illustration, C designed a group of characters for one class and decided to use those characters in our drawing final, a large 3 piece series.

those drawings look almost 3d, the characters were cut out and taped onto a drawn background, layered to have deep shadows. it doesn't look that good, but it's interesting, it even had the teacher encourage us to try making pop ups. C indeed tried that suggestion. and they liked it, the mix of art and engineering made C find it enjoyable.

i wonder why no other teacher before was as encouraging as her. why was it always to hide, not embrace.

now i sew. cosplay was something we've loved for years, but now we see how much our mom controlled us with it. i finally sewn a part of a cosplay from scratch. why was i not allowed to do that before is something C and I wonder now. C wore that costume to a convention, it was of the antagonist for our favorite game. it's weird, it feels like we're reclaiming what was stolen from us by an abusive peice of shit mother.

we've sewn a plush, it actually was the critter that went to C's costume. it's in an artshow now. something most people think to submit master studies, still lifes, and sculpture or abstract art to. now a pokemon from a fangame is in it, I'm told it's always the artwork you're not proud of that gets into shows, but now the plushy C is so proud of is on display. it's weird.

i know if our mom was alive, she's tell us what to submit, i doubt it would have been the plushy, she probably wouldn't have let us make it.

it's still weird. sometimes i wonder how our art would look if our mom just let us do our thing. or if we never got into that game. i know our art would be very different (or more consistent lol) if we weren't a system, but that one i can answer, the others will be mysteries as long as we're on our art journey

idk, moral of the story, it gets better even if it's weird as fuck. i went from not being allowed to do anything to making a giant staff out of wood at school (with the teacher's help because my disability said no saws for me) for a cosplay. I went from not knowing anything going on and being scared to jokingly arguing with my headmates about zelda lore while doing art homework. it's weird, it's unwell, but it's better than it was and it'll keep getting better

[tatsuyam]

sketchdump gettin kinda full fr

[stellorc]

This is a gift I did for @ipreferfiction and @revanchxst of their amazing kotor hp au work. I cannot put into words how much I love this fic (and everything they do really). It's ridiculously well written and there's so much care and work involved in it. So here is a group portrait of the first year cast featuring baby Revan and Alek with (our Lady and Savior) Andromache Fett, Orgus Din, Arren Kae and my beloved Lucy.

It was very fun to do it, even if it's so outside my sweet comfort zone of bust portraits. Also Green. So. Much. Green. Sadly Canderous and Cassus had to be left out for the sake of the composition. So this means I will be obliged to draw them doing their rivalry separately.

Also, here's the link to this superb work that I literally don't shut up about:

[clotpole-art]

Retrospective: Illustrated Merlin Alphabet Challenge

Finally finished the Merlin Alphabet Challenge, so here's the artist notes no one asked for! See below the cut for comments on each piece by order of creation. Be warned folks, it's a long post.

Before we begin: credit to @merlin-gifs for the challenge, which can be found here. It's awesome, go do it.

First thing you should know is I did probably 80-90% of these while on phone calls or in Zoom meetings and that's reflected in the simplicity of most pieces -- the compositions aren't complicated, the lines aren't refined, the coloring is slapdash. If you noticed variation in quality of the pieces, that's why!

Second: I tried to focus on trying something new for each drawing. Didn't always happen, but this challenge did succeed in helping me push me out of my own comfort zone.

Without further ado...

A is for Arthur Pendragon

Textures, baby! Brushed metal of his armor, scratchy linen texture of his shirt, wispy softness of hair and skin. I'd recently gotten my tablet out of storage after a year of figuring out where the hell I was going to live and this was one of the first pieces of digital art I spent time on. Glad it was Arthur kicking us off!

B is for the Beginning of the End (1x08)

Fun fact, I did not draw this with my tablet. I drew it with my work computer's touchscreen. It was awful, would not recommend.

C is for Camelot

I wanted to get used to different brushes, so landscape of the castle it was! There are brushes that help with drawing grass; I did not use said brushes and my wrist hurt afterward. That being said, I really enjoyed working on this and it was one of the few pieces I didn't do while multitasking.

D is for Daegal

Also drawn on my work computer's touchscreen, not my tablet. I didn't learn my lesson from B and the experience was even worse. This is my least favorite piece which sucks because it's Daegal so I'm slated to redo this sometime in the near future. Gotta do our boy justice.

E is for Elyan

Oh, I adored drawing this. Elyan often gets shafted in terms of fandom appreciation so I made sure to choose Elyan for this prompt and to participate in the Elyan fest. Plus, I love a good ghost story and figuring out a way to include the druid spectre was fun. Didn't multitask on this piece because Elyan deserved my full attention.

F is for Freya

Ho boy. This piece. I have such mixed feelings on this drawing. Really really didn't like it after I'd decided it was done and very nearly scrapped the whole thing. I had a vision in my head that I just couldn't render into reality and it frustrated me SO MUCH. Looking back, I like it much better than I did when I first created it.

G is for Gwaine

What can I say, he's pretty when he's cold. I didn't stretch too much with this one -- it's my normal drawing style, I was just trying to find a brush that mimicked the softness of pencil.

H is for Hunith

Another one that didn't stray too far from my comfort zone. I was stupid sick and slammed at work, so a motherly Hunith manifested herself. I blame the bad brush choice on the cold medicine.

I is for Isolde

I woke up and chose violence! Tried to vary my figure drawing style a little in this piece but my brain resisted, resulting in... this. Not mad at it, but not happy with it either. Poor Isolde.

J is for Juggling

Ah, this lovely piece was drawn during a particularly vexing meeting at work. Fun fact, there's another version of this line art that's less about Merlin's stress and more about mine.

K is for Knights of Camelot

Continuing the theme of doodling through bad news and shit meetings. Like I said above, normally meeting doodles aren't complex because I'm concentrating on something else. This one was more involved because I didn't want to concentrate on the meeting. I have a few issues with this from a technical standpoint (perspective, my nemesis) but it's still one of my favorites. Tried some funky coloring technique, didn't hate it.

V is for Vibrant Colors

And here is where we said fuck the rules and started going out of alphabetical order! This one was really fun to do and I loved kicking off Albion Party with this as my first submission. The colors were a challenge (as I hoped they would be) and this is the first time I had to do some color tweaking midway though and after finishing the coloring process. Vibrant Arthur, my beloved. This started as a multitask doodle but took dedicated time to finish.

O is for Old Religion

The concept for this one was buzzing in my head for a bit before a quote-prompt solidified it. I adore the thought of more visible, tangible representations of Merlin as the son of the elements, of "magic itself" -- not just sun-gold eyes, but sea-water hair and sandstone-skin. A complement to the vibrant Arthur portrait.

S is for Sorcerers

When I said I wanted to challenge myself, I wasn't kidding. Ho boy, this was fun but frustrating. I wanted to completely illustrate a gif. So I did. Will I do something like this again? Maybe. A while from now.

M is for Morgause

See above -- same illustrated gif style so at least I was able to reuse some drawings. Poor Morgause ended up looking a little wretched here because I was mentally done with this when I was drawing her. Love the concept of tarot cards + Merlin but others are doing it so I won't continue this series.

Z is for Zzzz

This one was specifically done to test out some custom brushes I made in Krita to make abstract background drawing easier for me. I think they turned out well! Plus who doesn't love bb iridescent Aithusa.

L is for Leon, P is for Percival

Quick, minimal doodles of the boys! Mentally, I was going for a Brady's-style retro ensemble cast TV show credits feel. Not mad at it! Some boys look closer to their actors than others (I think my brain broke drawing Percy, my apologies to Tom Hopper).

T is for Tristan

It wasn't until after I posted this that I realized there was more than one Tristan in Merlin. Could have drawn Isolde's bf but I drew Ygraine's dumb jock undead brother instead. Had some fun with dark greys and blacks here regardless.

Q is for Queen Annis

Best royal in Albion, bar none. I tried a different coloring technique here and I kinda like it! may make it my go-to but we'll see. Old habits are hard to break. Also: our queen deserved more badass clothes.

X is for Arthur X Merlin

Oh, be still my shipper heart. Doodled and colored during a meeting. I had hoped to spend more time on it outside of multitasking but alas, work is a bitch. This one is slated for a rework sometime in the future; I adore the concept too much to let it go without creating another version of this that isn't an utter mess.

U is for Uther's Ward

And here's my attempt at forgoing line art. Not fun, do not like.

Y is for Young Warlock

Channeled some pain into this one. Those are the dead eyes of someone who had been told that he'd succeeded when his friend died. That the destiny he'd been expecting to carry on his shoulders into old age was done and dusted before he turned 30. Grief plus the existential dread of the aimless immortal. Oof. One of my favs.

N is for Nimueh, R is for Rising Sun, W is for Will

And we end on this sorry offering. I was away from home for a while without my tablet and I just got tired of waiting. So, pen doodles at the airport. This was a challenge in its own right because 1. pen only and 2. I wasn't able to pull Netflix up for a reference on the fly. Which is why Will's face is obscured and Nimueh looks.... not like Nimueh lol.

In summary: this was a goddamn joy to do. I finished 26 letter prompts in approximately 21 weeks, which exceeded my own unspoken goal of filling one letter per week. I found a good, happy corner of the Merlin fandom after a years-long hiatus away from being a fandom creator. If you did make it this far with me, thanks for reading my inane comments and giving this little project even a moment of your time -- I'm so grateful.

[robin-the-enby]

Hey! I love your matchups and I really want one with on the black butler characters.

I am ISTJ and even though I was born in America I come from a Mexican family. So I am fluent in Spanish and English. Along side of Mandarin Chinese (still learning) and Japanese (still learning)

Appearance wise, I have olive skin, long wavy/curly hair that reaches my tailbone (i like putting it in side braid). I also have long bangs that quite often fall over my glasses. And just too lazy to move them. I also have dimples when I smile. I will bite anyone who try poke them.

Personality: I can get hard to know at first because I have trust issues (my heart has been broken okay) . Not too mention people don't try to get know me because of my major Resting Bitch Face. They think I am judging them or that I am scary. But I am not... I am attentive so I will stand up for myself and anyones else. I am patient. Also, after you get to know me you will realize I am a chaotic crackhead with a melodramatic persona. Like "your star is here!" "The stage is calling for me. Move out of my way" "the spotlight is on me so could you move you crusty face?" I like to tease and flirt with the people I am close to. I zone out or daydream a lot. And in the worst times. It could be a serious meeting and I am chuckling because of something in my head. Which have scared people. It could be during a conversation and I will stop listening. But I will always feel bad and apologize.

I also like to scare people. Like tell them the unsolved cases or horrific cases that I know (I love unsolved cases) . This is also why my little siblings hate me. Turns out talking kids murder cases and disapperinv cases was not appropriate for bed time story... woops.....

I like to pop out of nowhere and either flick or playfully punch my friends and say boo. I do accidentally roast people. I don't think before I say things. And don't realize until hours or days later. And I am like "shit"

I am sarcastic and that has gotten me in trouble before. My friend asked for my advice and I didn't know she was being serious. So I gave her a sarcastic advice and she came back to me mad. I was like "shit you believed me?"

Likes/hobbies: i like my anatomy class and I like to read, write, meditate (because I get stressed a lot). I really like to dance and listen to music. Which my music taste is everywhere: Kpop, classical music, jazz, jpop, Spanish songs, rock, metal. Every music genre except for country. I like to play the violin.

My passion lies in the arts and crafts. I would like to do illustration and photography. More specifically street fashion photography and and event photography. Like weddings and funerals. Yes funeral photography does exist and I will like to do it. Since it is also special event. I draw a lot of portraits and landscapes. I have been told that my art is either scary or mysterious. Though I can get a little caught up with my passion. I practice to get better with no rest.

Flaws/toxic traits: I am not empathetic or sympathetic. People always thought I didn't care about my friend's issues. I do i just don't understand them. My compassion does make up for this and will give advice. My other flaw, is the high walls I build to protect myself. I am there for other people. But people were never there for me. People have manupliated me and that cause me trust issues. I don't know how to handle negative emotions like depression, anxiety, self doubt, procrastination. So I just isolate myself in these moods. They really take a toll on me and make me think I can't do my passions. I am afraid of commitment because of toxic relationships i had before.

Love language: I am not obvious with affection. (Because no one ever gave me it). I show it through my teasing and flirting. My love language is however Act of Service. I will help my s/o with anything they need. Chores, work, advice, etc. Sort of the mom of my friend group. But a Savage mom as I have been told. "Stop crying, here I made you a cookie" "do I need to hurt someone" "don't worry I can get coffin with a lock in it". I am also an aggressive supporter. Like "No YOU are beautiful. YOU are gorgeous!" (This happened when someone gives me affection and time try to turn the attention to them as way to hide my fluster)

I will call my s/o like "stupid" "idiot" but in a endearing way. Okay. Occasionally I will use "beloved" and "Cariño/cariña"

I am not good receiving verbal affection or physical affection. I was never given affection so I am not used to it. I will start blushing and stop working. I will also probably say "idiot" or turn the attention to them like "no.. u" but I think fails because I am terrible at hiding my blush. I get easily flustered with affection okay. But I won't ever admit that I like it. Though it is obvious.

Sexuality: i am bisexual so it doesn't matter what gender I am paired up with.

Funt fact i guess?: I love small plants, plushies, and banana milk. Like I have hundreds of different kinds of plants and they each have their own name. Like GGmo, Lily, Melody, Edward. I love Banana milk as I said. I drink it every evening. It always get me happy so when I am sad or had a bad day. I drink banana milk and I am happy. It is also to make up for my coffee addiction. I am addicted to coffee. My friends said no coffee and I was like fine banana milk then :)

This is getting long now... bye.

I'm glad that you like my matchups, I'm trying my best tbh😅 I match you with:

Sebastian Michaelis

Sebastian is very curious in nature, so he definitely wants to know what you're really like, not the front you put on.

He's also very charming when he wants to, he makes it very easy to open up to him and get comfortable around him.

Sure, he, as a demon, doesn't really care much for humans, so when he doesn't have to play the polite, kind butler, he probably has a RBF as well, however, I think that changes when he's interacting with someone he loves.

His sweet words may have been a mask at first, so he could see the real you, but the closer you two become, the more he means every word of praise, encouragment or comfort he utters.

He would most certainly be amused by your crackhead self once you do get comfortable around him, but it's not really his vibe. He wouldn't scold you for being loud, brash or inapropriate, like he does the other servants.

If he's in a really good mood or when the situation calls for it, he can be dramatic as well. Sometimes he'd do it just to get on Ciel's nerves XD

One big pro of being with Sebastian is that he lets you off the hook a lot. If he was talking to anyone else and they'd space out, oh honey, he would stare them down so hard, it's sending chills down my spine just thinking about it. But if it's you it's like a complete 180, Sebastian can't possibly be mad at you, everyone spaces out sometimes, those things just happen.

The other servants make sure to be on your good side so that you could intercede with him on their behalf.

You can't scare him with your true crime stories, but you sure as hell can scare the others. And you can bet your ass Seb's gonna help! The plan is: You tell the story and then he's gonna pop up out of nowhere behind them, giving them mini heart attacks.

If you try to scare him though, you'll need to be on guard 24/7 until he gets you in return. And even if your on guard all the time, he finds a way to scare the life out of you.

Your humor is practically the same, I mean, Sebastian is great at off handed remarks/roasts and sarcastic comments that you have to look for to really see them. You two could be talking shit about anyone and everybody would be like "Oh yeah, normal conversation, yes"

Sebastian would love to dance with you. And trust me when I say this, he is good at any type of dance. If you two are ever at a ball, prepare your feet, because he's not gonna let go of you the whole night (unless his master is in danger of course).

He would be your #1 supporter, he'd go with you out to take photos, and if you asked him to look at some, he'd take a good long look at each and every one of them and describe in detail how he feels about them. Also would go to any art shows you'd host if it came to it.

When it comes to sympathy and empathy, Sebastian also has a hard time showing these feelings. He's been alive for far longer than any human on Earth and he's a demon. He's never had any of the problems humans have, so naturally he doesn't kniw what it feels like to have them. Plus, before you came into his life, he didn't care much for them either.

However, he's gonna be there for you whenever you need him, emotionally or practically, even though he doesn't get your feelings.

You both have walls put up, you because of bad past experiences, him because as a demon, he has major issues with being vulnerable in any way. And I'm not talking just emotionally here, but demons are almost undestroyable, yet they have very few weaknesses that they just need to hide away.

It's rare Sebastian has a problem, but even if he had, you wouldn't know, because he thinks you, as a human, wouldn't understand and so he won't burden your mind with it. However, he's very perceptive and so if your behaviour changes, be it due to anxiety or a depressive episode, he'll know.

Now, he's not the type of person to try and break down your walls by force, but in situstions like these, where he's not sure how to help, you gotta talk to him and he won't leave you alone until you tell him how he can help.

He's not above carrying you around and doing everything for you until you're embarassed enough to tell him

He is very appreciative of your help around, since the other servants are good at everything but what they're supposed to do.

You with your tough love and Sebastian with his teeth rotting compliments and affection, it'd be honestly really funny to watch. He adores how you show affection, because it's different from most people he's known. But on the other hand, you can't expect him not to spoil you afte all the hard work you do every day?

He would really shower you in love and affection, because you deserve it and because it makes you flustered XD

[perditaalottachocolate-blog]

One of His Best Kittens (3) - Plag Appreciation Week, Day 3: Cat nap

Day 1  Day 2  |Day 3|  Day 4  Day 5  Day 6  Day 7

Warning: Contains spoilers to season 2.

Also on AO3 / fanfiction.net

Day 3: Cat nap

High up the skateboard ramps of Adrien’s room, right next to the hot pipes delivering water to the upper floor of the mansion Plagg made himself a nest. The place was perfect. Secluded but providing a strategic view to the whole room. Warm, sunny for most of the day. Plus it faced away from those four giant screens Adrien never needed but used simultaneously anyway. That was his sacred cat-nap zone, a place he valued almost as much as his beloved trash can.

Adrien knew better than to bother him, when the black cat rested in his zone. Unless there was a literal catastrophe (pun not only unintended but also scowled at, as Adrien used it too often), the boy left his kwami to his own devices and not even once intruded his space up the ramps.

But lately Plagg found his rests more fulfilling when he wasn’t napping alone. Those weren’t frequent occasions, as during most days the black kwami traveled wherever Adrien went – to school, photoshoots, various activities or akuma battles. But almost every night now, usually around midnight he heard telltale tingling his butterfly friend made as he phased through the wall and into the cat-nap zone. Sometimes they talked and plotted their plans of sabotaging Hawk Moth’s efforts and supporting Ladybug and Chat Noir in their mission. But most often Nooroo just silently curled up next to Plagg and released a sigh of relief, before falling asleep. He was gone before dawn, just minutes before Adrien’s alarm went off.

Plagg could already see those nights and his own company had a clear effect on his fellow kwami. Nooroo’s wings regained their smooth edges. His complexion, although still unnaturally lavender at least ceased to look unhealthy. And that cheeky sparkle in his eyes was back. Morover Plagg noted with satisfaction, that lately Hawk Moth’s performances lacked inspiration. Powers that were granted proved useless or blew the moth wielder in the face. The black cat could listen for hours to Nooroo retelling time after time how much fun it had been to watch Hawkie dodging rockets and tripping over fragments of missiles that attacked him in his own lair.

But that night instead of dozing off next to Nooroo Plagg woke up to a very uncomfortable feeling of being pressed into the butterfly kwami to tightly for comfort while his bedding seemed soaked with water. Someone was sobbing next to him, a warm kwami body trembling with sniffles and squeezing the air out of his lungs. Only one creature in the world could cry like that.

‘Duusu, I can’t breathe,’ he wheezed and the pressure on his chest dropped immediately.

‘Oh, Plagg!’ the peacock kwami wailed, new tears rolling from his eyes. ‘You’re finally awake! I’m so glad I found you and Roo here!’

The little cat nudged Nooroo with his elbow a few times, but the lavender bug was apparently too deep in his sleep to bother. If he didn’t mind the damp bed and being pressed into wall, he probably wouldn’t be waking up anytime soon. Just Plagg’s luck, now he was stuck with the weeper.

‘Hi, Dus,’ he sighed. ‘Fancy seeing you here.’

The blue kwami sniffed a few times and smoothed his wet feathers. ‘How come you have a kwami sleepover and I wasn’t invited,’ he complained. Plagg thought it was intended as a joke, but there was little humor in miniature peacock’s reddened eyes.

‘Nice of you to drop by anyway,’ the little cat replied with a shrug and moved a bit to make some place for the new kwami in his cat-nap zone. ‘Here, have a seat,’ he patted the spot next to him and the furthest from Adrien’s bed. ‘Keep those feathers to yourself just in case. My Chosen is allergic and we don’t want a coughing fit drill at 2 AM.’

Duusu sat shyly on the edge of the bedding and picked on his tail in silence.

‘So, you’re no longer in the brooch,’ Plagg supplied, not sure what to make of this fact. He had a very unpleasant feeling he might not like the answer but he had to ask. ‘Who’s your holder?’

‘A woman. She didn’t tell me her name,’ the peacock kwami frowned. ‘I think she was tall but most humans are to me. She was wearing men clothes. Trousers! Is it normal now?’

‘Yeah, it’s called a suit. Some women like to wear those, others still stick to dresses and skirts. You’ll get used to it,’ said the self proclaimed expert on fashion.

‘There was a taller man with her,’ Duusu continued. ‘Pale hair, glasses, red trousers. You know them?’

‘We haven’t been introduced if that’s what you’re asking,’ Plagg rolled his eyes. ‘The man is Nooroo’s current holder and the woman is his assistant.’

‘Really? They never told me he had a miraculous, although I thought it was a bit suspicious,’ the blue kwami scratched his chin. ‘And they looked more like a couple to me.’

‘They are not a couple.’

‘Sorry, you know how it is when you’re summoned after a long time,’ the new kwami started to brush his tail sheepishly. ‘Maybe it’s normal now, but why does that man have his assistant’s portrait in that large chamber?’

The little cat blinked at him a few times trying to make some sense out of Duusu’s words. ‘What portrait?’

‘Large painting, between windows, the woman was not in that white suit thing she wore today but in a golden dress?’ the peacock ventured.

Plagg released a string of profanities and Duusu gasped. ‘Language, Plaggie!’

‘Okay,’ the black kwami sighed in exasperation. ‘Once again then. What does your new holder look like?’

‘Don’t you mean my Chosen?’ his blue friend raised his brows as high as the red dot on his forehead.

‘Dus, what does she look like!’

‘Long blonde hair, braided. Green eyes. Pale skin. I already said she was tall,’ the peacock recited.

Plagg narrowed his eyes and bit down on his lower lip to keep the next portion of expletives inside. ‘Shit,’ was all that managed to escape.

Duusu observed him in silence, absentmindedly tending to his tail.

‘What’s going on here, Plagg?’ He asked after a while. ‘I could practically smell Nooroo on that man, but they told me I was the only kwami here. That they possessed only my miraculous.’ He hiccupped a few times and soon started sobbing again. ‘They said something about miraculous chest falling into wrong hands after the temple was destroyed. I didn’t know it was destroyed! What about our friends? What about the guardians?’

And before the little cat could even think about answering Duusu was already a blubbering mess. ‘I don’t like it, Plagg. I don’t like them!’

‘Dus, please, calm down,’ Plagg tried to break through the wall of weeping, while staying silent. Dus? Dus!’ He whisper-yelled but the blue kwami was too deep in his galloping hysterics to listen.

So Plagg did the first thing that came to his mind. He started humming the song of kwami. It predated human concepts of music by millennia. Already harmonious before tones were even invented. Sweet, soothing sounds that once were the basis of kwami communication, before the language was forged by first homo sapiens. Human ear couldn’t pick all the sounds that made the song, although they were susceptible to its effect too.

Still humming the black kwami put his paw on Duusu’s lips to end his teary ramblings. The little peacock’s eyes widened in shock, but soon he started sway to the ancient rhythm and joined in. Plagg hummed and purred until he saw his blue friend’s eyelids close and his breath even. Soon the little peacock leaned into Plagg and fell asleep. The black kwami laid him gently next to Nooroo and Duusu instantly wrapped his arms around the butterfly.

There wasn’t much space left for him, but Plagg curled into a tight ball completing the cuddle pile in his cat-nap zone. He listened to the gentle snoring of his Chosen and silent whistles of the remaining two kwamis. Although he was always pleased to meet his friends, he couldn’t ignore the twisting of his stomach at the implications of Duusu’s presence. Every fiber of his being screamed at him in big green letters “Trouble ahead”.

This wasn’t exactly new to Plagg. It was kwami fate to always appear at times of trouble. What was new however, was how entwined the miraculous holders’ paths currently were, with Adrien at the centre of the network. Duusu and Nooroo being awake posed only as greater threat to Chat Noir. Poor kid suffered through enough in his short life, the black cat mused. It wasn’t fair that this was coming his way. Sooner or later the midden is going to hit the windmill and Plagg would rather not be the metaphorical Hercules to clean those Augeas’s stables. It had been already dreadful the first time round.

As the sleep finally claimed him, the black cat decided to put those thoughts for tomorrow, taking a mental note to get some extra helping of camembert just in case.

The credit for the idea of cat-nap zone goes to @kryallaorchid and her ameouwzing Tendencies series. I changed it a bit, but this is what came to me first when I thought about cat naps.

[ninniso0o0o]

In 2017 I improved further in art, at the first 4 months I concentrated on portraits, and am satisfied, but I really missed drawing comics, so instead, I started drawing funky pictures of Hai and Mei’s INCREDIBLE friendship! It was GREAT! It helped me increase my pace and become faster, but not on the expense of the artwork! They turned out pretty good for funky and most importantly I didn’t take forever on ‘em! I also participated in an art challenge during July, and contrarily to my expectations, I did incredibly good! Then comes the last 4 months where I was generous mode and draw a comic, and gifts for my beloved friends! I also made 4 colorful drawings and tried ink too (which are out of my comfort zone) I got more engaged in art that I sort of abandoned video games! Hell I even purchased a posing program for my phone to use... I bought a tablet but ugh! I just hope 2018 will bring about a good digital art debate...

[daisysaulls]

What was the most important thing to you when planning your wedding?

We really wanted to make everything personal and true to us. For example, reading our own vows to each other, our signature drinks being named after our departed and beloved pets, LA street names for table numbers, one of our best friends as our officiant, Eddie’s cousin singing our first dance, etc. We spent extra time on the little, personal touches.

When have you been most proud of him/her?

Danielle: Eddie has done a lot of noteworthy and brave things in his life including traveling to Southeast Asia for a few months on his own. Unfortunately I didn’t know him yet then! Still proud of him for doing that though. I’m also proud of him for quitting his government job in DC and moving across the country to California. I’m also proud of him for coordinating all the members of our immediate families to surprise me out in California for the proposal! He actually kept it a secret and it was the greatest surprise of my life! 

Eddie: When she made the decision to leave her friends and family behind and move across the country to California with me. I know it was a tough decision at the time but it really showed me that she had the courage to take on the unknown.

What was your favorite moment on your wedding day?

Danielle: That’s such a hard question! There were so many amazing and favorable moments. These are some of my faves: 1. Reading our vows to each other. 2. My dad’s speech. 3. All of the dancing. 

Eddie: There were so many great moments from the wedding day, but my favorite moment had to be the ceremony itself. I'll never forget the image of Danielle walking down the aisle.

How does he/she make you a better person?

Danielle: Eddie makes me a better person because he has taken me out of my comfort zone and taught me that change is good. 

Eddie: My interests and hobbies change often and Danielle has always been there to support me throughout all of my endeavors. She has also taught me the value of empathy.

When you think about your future together, what is the thing you look forward to most?

Danielle: Exploring new cities and countries together and having children/starting a family! 

Eddie: Raising a family with Danielle has always been my dream and I know she’ll be such a caring and loving mother. Adopting a pupper with her is a close second.

What advice can you give other couples planning their wedding?

Just do what feels true to you guys. Listen to your families’ opinions, but ultimately do what’s in your hearts. Also, something will go wrong. Something always doesn’t go according to plan at everyone’s wedding and just try not to let it ruin your mood. Your guests will sense it if you do and plus, you only get this day once in your life!

What was your favorite wedding detail?

The signature drinks. Both of the dogs we grew up with have passed away so we named each of our signature drinks after them. “The Jake” and “The Ridgely”. It made us feel like they were a part of the day and with us in spirit even if they weren’t physically there.

Did everything go as planned? If not, how did you make the best of it and why did you choose to do it that way?

Haha. Funny you should ask! We had a terrible bus transportation fiasco that caused our ceremony to start an entire hour late. We made the best of it by just having the catering people begin serving alcohol to the guests that were already there and then those of us in hiding just started poppin’ bottles of champagne! There’s always something that doesn’t go according to plan and we just didn’t let that ruin the day. Everything was perfect outside of that anyways!

Sometimes I’ll ask my couples to describe themselves as a couple in one word. If you ask me, Danielle and Eddie’s word is FUN. They know how to have fun and enjoy life! Just look at their ceremony photos! Nothing but belly laughs and heartfelt tears of joy. They love each other and their friends and family brilliantly. In fact, throughout their wedding planning process, they made sure that their time with one another and their loved ones was the priority for the day. They chose to do their first look, portraits, wedding party photos, and family photos all before the ceremony so that they could enjoy the rest of their evening with friends and family. As you can see from their photos, it paid off for them! It was one epic party!

Congratulations to the happy couple. I am so excited for all that life has in store for you! Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your day.  

A big thanks to their amazing vendor team! 

Photography: Daisy Saulls Photography Second Photographer: Christy Kosnic Photography Videography: Avail Visuals  Florals: Love Blooms Here  Venue: Woodlawn & Frank Lloyd Wright’s Pope-Leighey House Catering: Design Cuisine Rentals: Select Event Group DJ 🎶: DJ Luccio Hair: Alison Harper Co. Menswear: Indochino Gown: Willow by Waters Bridesmaids: Dessy Group   Stationary: @minted

[doodlewash]

Hello! I am Vasundhara. I am born and was brought up in Satara, Maharashtra State, India. A beautiful scenic town situated amidst seven hills, Satara is a five picturesque hour drive from Mumbai. As a child, I was always fascinated by the beauty I found around me. My eyes used to form objects by seeing uneven shapes of stones, clouds, tiles, brown crust of chapati (flatbread). Anything could be endearing for my visualization.

But nobody, including me, realised my exceptional talent for drawing until the age of 6, when I enlarged an approximately 5cm sized image of Lord Krishna into the 3ft tall sketch on the blackboard without scales. Everyone was amazed! I remember my father clicking my picture along with the sketch in his camera. Maybe that’s how I started. It felt so good when my drawings made everyone happy.

The encouragement I received from my grandmother had a profound impact on my paintings that you see today. I have seen her sewing and knitting beautiful things, along with her absolute hand for beautiful rangolis. So, I would definitely say that it is in my genes, as in family, my parents are pretty much obsessed about perfection, and I perceive them as a blessing. Also, there are many members in my family who can draw perfect lines and sketch sometimes, but they’re all in different fields, and never enrolled themselves in the Fine Arts because there was no Art School in our town those days.

But I was very sure and clear about my goals at a very young age. I did not want to go into the fields of commerce or science (the only options we had in our town, moreover it would have added another two years of waiting to go for G D Art & I had no patience to wait). I used to participate in drawing competitions, and even though I bagged the first place in my batch, unfortunately it was never considered as a core subject to include in grades.

At the age of 15, I took the big decision of my life. I somehow gathered courage and told my art teacher in the school that I wanted to pursue my education in Fine Art, that I wanted to do G.D. Arts (Graduate Diploma in Arts). My teacher considered the conversation with warmest regards, later to find out my father’s agreement to my decision and wanting to send me to Pune (two hours’ drive from my town, which was a big deal for my family then, as sending daughters away for education was something they weren’t familiar and comfortable with), where I could pursue my dreams.

I was amazed, excited and nervous at the same time. To achieve my dream, I had to leave my loving family, my town, my comfort zone and go to Pune City, which has a rich legacy in education and considered as the Oxford of India.

My 10th standard exams were over and like every year I bought a new drawing book for myself, so that I could draw the way I wanted to with no worries about other subjects like history, maths etc. My results were out and I passed with 56% which was not something to be proud of, but still I distributed sweets to all the members of my family and friends as a funny ritual. The next day my father took me to Pune to get a prospectus of the college. I glided with joy after seeing the college of my dream. I wonder how hard it was for my parents. I am grateful they could control their emotions while sending me away for my education, or rather, for the sake of my dream.

I got the admission for Foundation (1st year) in Bharati Kala Mahavidyalaya, Pune. On the desired date, my parents and siblings came to drop me to the hostel. Thankfully, one of our relatives were there to guide me till the second day of college, until which whom I was supposed to stay with. I didn’t realise the pain I was going through staying far from my family. I used to cry a lot (as if someone had forced me to go away from them). But college was a blissful distraction. I used to learn deliberately and most importantly enjoy everything which came along my way.

My professors appreciated me all the time. The things I learnt in college still stand strong, the values cherished every day. I had learnt good understanding of light, shadows, depth, perspective at that age. I used to do my assignments in poster colours aka gouache. I never tried watercolours those days (which is a regret, how I wish I had known it is a delight of painting). I stood out first in the annual examination among girls and second in the class. I wanted to continue in the same college for the next four years but as I hadn’t completed my 12th grade, I wasn’t qualified for the degree course.

I had to move to another college which has a Diploma course, which is equivalent to a Degree, that’s how they call it, `Graduate Diploma in Art’ aka G.D. Art. I was selected through merit in Abhinav Kala Mahavidyalaya, Pune, for the Elementary (2nd year). I got to learn the things which are efficacious for a lifetime. My personality developed from a shy girl to a confident artist. I became proficient in subjects like life drawing, illustration, graphic design, caricature, portraits, calligraphy and typography.

Even at this stage, I never considered watercolours for my projects. I used to do it in acrylics when I had to paint on the canvas. I had plenty free time in those days and I hardly did plein-air landscape paintings in poster colour. I remember doing a commission work of 6ft x 6ft mural in acrylics and I bought a first model of 3.2mp camera phone for myself, to help with my projects. In those days I was a career enthusiast and often dreamed of making a career in painting.

I worked as a graphic designer in TimeOut Bengaluru Magazine after I was married. Needless to say, life changed completely as I moved to Bangaluru, Karnataka State with my husband. A state where the regional language was different than my native place. I feel fortunate to have wise in-laws, who always encouraged my art even though everyone comes from a technical background and didn’t know what exactly I was going to do with my degree. I used to get few commission works and for that I had to search for materials which was not as easy as it used to be in Pune. I had to start everything from scratch.

I hardly received funds from the clients which was minimal compared to my efforts and contribution to fetch perfect results. But it certainly gave me different subjects to work on and helped me learn new things. It was heart-warming when people didn’t know me, yet tried to trust my work. Later on, I got pregnant and took a huge break and my baby became my passion. I was enjoying the contrast in my world. My basic trait of enjoying the beauty never diminished and I used to feel the nature intently with my baby now. It developed the little world in my womb. My childhood literally came back to life.

When my little one was about 4 years, I gradually tried to explore the spectrum of my art. I fashioned handmade greeting cards along with customized envelope from scratch. I designed my logo as `Piece of Mind’ and received orders for customised work. It used to fulfill my creative yearnings. I managed to paint some canvases with a different illustrative character. I exhibited my work in Chitra Santhe (Art Market) where artists from all over India get an opportunity of exhibiting their work for a day. My work did good business and I acquired good connections in the field. When I finally felt settled, my husband was relocated to Scotland.

I was going to get a new world but, for that, I had to leave so many things behind, again! I had to search things related to my art, again! I had to prove my talent in the unknown place, again! Most importantly, I couldn’t carry my beloved art materials which I had gathered after all these years. Obviously buying things related to art is not easy. It is quite challenging financially and qualitatively.

We moved to Glasgow in Scotland (a place I had never heard of before). It was love at first site. It released a true artist hidden inside me. Naturally, it took a few months to find what I could do with my art here. As being in a new country has its own many challenges. After dropping my child to school, I used to walk miles in search of materials and waited for my calling. My husband encouraged me to advertise my cards in the Scottish Design Exchange, but unfortunately I could not reach my expected targets. I was completely embarrassed but did not give up on hope.

One fine day, a friend took me to Glasgow City Mission (GCM). I met a few of the kindest people who work for homeless and refugees. In order to gain proficiency in the English language, everyone was welcome to attend. It encouraged interactions from people all over the world and it was a huge confidence boost for me. I had a look at their event schedules and it said ‘Art’ on Fridays. I was overjoyed to see this and I went there on Friday and was enchanted by the lovely artistic aura of the place. People were doing everything related to art, sketching, painting, pottery. I tried pottery for the first time and it blew my mind. I found it very satisfying. I started looking forward to Fridays.

Once, I observed an artist painting a wreath with watercolours and I also felt like experimenting. I borrowed a lightly tinted paper and gave watercolour a try. It was extremely overwhelming. I sensibly invested in WHSmith watercolours and A4 watercolour paper book and started experimenting with it. I first painted live, sitting in my living room. It was a view of sunlight falling on the bedroom. I was happy with the result. The next day, I captured a sunset image while going to a grocery shop. I painted it after returning home by seeing it on my phone. It took me nearly 2 hours to complete it. I was stunned with the alluring effect of watercolours. I wanted to do more.

I referred another image from Edinburgh, which I had captured from a hop on-hop off bus. I was satisfied when I discovered I could do better than I expected. I have a habit of clicking pictures on my phone. I don’t own any DSLR camera as of now. So that’s how I took a shine to this new side of my art. I never stopped from that point. Later on, I got to know that, for watercolours, I should use good quality paper, which must be 100% cotton. I didn’t want to buy it immediately, though I dreamt of painting on that. I wanted to gain more confidence to achieve the best results.

Also, those papers were expensive to start experimenting with. (I always considered my logo ‘Piece Of Mind’ (POM) is going to present me as my brand. And I had no funds remaining at POM. Even though my better half would love to invest, I didn’t want to treat myself with easier options. Challenges can bring out the best in you. So, I bought an A4 size Cass Art watercolour book after I completed my first book with good results. I started posting my work on Instagram. I made a video of the book flipping by taking help from GCM. My second book was a bigger accomplishment.

I do not own a studio for my art yet. As my work requires a lot of floor space, I paint in my living room sitting beside my kid’s toy arrangements. It is funny and challenging at the same time. It is my dream to own a studio plus workspace, with ample amount of natural light, a good storage space for materials, a desk, an easel, and essential gadgets like DSLR camera, scanner, printer.

Now, I am working on my third book, an A3 sized Winsor & Newton watercolour book. From the first painting in this book, I was elevated with the relaxing strokes I painted on it. I have bought three shades of Winsor & Newton professional watercolour tubes. The paper felt very beautiful for the washes and it dries out late so it helps to do wet on wet technique easily. Also, the texture is amazing to see the pigment granulation. Every painting I paint is a subject of profound happiness.

The credit goes to Glasgow and its environment, for being purveyors of eternal beauty of its buildings. I got inspired seeing this and my real talent started to transpire. I wish I had known my passion for paintings much earlier. Being a homemaker, I face many obstacles and get involved in many time consuming chores which keeps me from my painting, but I manage to find the time to engage in my fancy for watercolours. I give myself more challenges to overcome the anxiety of painting complex subjects. Believe me it works the best!

I am someone who prefers looking for art materials rather than jewellery, accessories and clothing. People think I should invest in gold, which can be useful in the future. Either way they’re right. But each piece I create is more precious than gold for me. I may not earn today. But it will be respected even after my life! Gold can be melted and turned into another piece. My paintings will be engraved in many hearts and remain forever as a beautiful memory. Thank you for reading and I wish you all the best for your artistic journey!

Vasundhara Instagram

GUEST ARTIST: "My Profound Love For Watercolour" by Vasundhara - #doodlewash #WorldWatercolorGroup #watercolour #watercolor Hello! I am Vasundhara. I am born and was brought up in Satara, Maharashtra State, India. A beautiful scenic town situated amidst seven hills, Satara is a five picturesque hour drive from Mumbai.

[pauldeckerus]

Portraits of Thunderchiefs, the Rolling Thunder Pilots of the Vietnam War

There are people who understand you well enough to challenge you but in that if-you’re-not-pushing-boundaries-you’re-not-doing-it-right kind of way — people you ultimately trust to have your back and your best interests at heart. Kate Chase, my friend, former rep and now producer, is one of those people.

She’s the engine on my new project Over War. And while there were more than a few times that I was called to step outside of my comfort zone, I’m really glad I answered.

Kate’s beloved uncle “Moose” was an Air Force pilot who had served in Vietnam and flew the F-105 as a Thunderchief. She had heard from her mom that he would be attending a military reunion in San Antonio with other Thunderchiefs and she believed that I, as a photographer who chases characters and follows faces, should get myself there.

Moving On the Wind

And I was off to San Antonio. I have always been up for adventure with my camera in tow. If there’s a whiff of a kernel of a spark of an idea for an interesting photograph, I’ll follow it on the wind. I packed up and showed up with a key crew.

Texas was hot, the hotel nondescript. But what awaited us inside was a rich chapter of American history that I believe is unknown to most. These retired pilots are an often-overlooked part of the Vietnam War — itself by the year further relegated in our national narrative.

I stood with my camera among these pilots who have not forgotten any detail of how and why they are connected.

Jessie Henderson

Fly on the Wall

The beginnings of the portrait-making. Setting up and observing, I never know what I’m going to encounter in my personal portrait projects and how a day will go. It’s the beauty of the unknown.

With the Thunderchiefs, I felt like a reverent fly on the wall as they warmed up, and fell easily into their friendships forged in the most difficult of circumstances.

I like to go to the source for these group portrait projects, embed myself in the space and community they share. I’ve used the technique before, creating a studio of sorts in the very middle of the space inhabited by the group I’d like to photograph. Here we set up in a rented conference room and pulled each pilot aside during breaks in their conversations.

They didn’t say much when they stepped away from their fellow pilots, they didn’t need to it was there on their faces, the brotherhood, support, joy, pain, pride, and life shared.

As they talked to each other and then later through interviews, I heard the things said echoed in what I saw through my lens.

Ed Skowron

Opening Up

The prevailing stories and images from this controversial war, are almost exclusively those of the grueling ground war, while these airmen remained mostly stoic and silent about their experiences. The exception, I discovered, takes place at these reunions where these men with similar experiences could enjoy the precious, and blood-earned, crucible of comradeship with fellow warriors.

Upon seeing the final product and her husband’s portrait, Jan Lockhart shared these heartfelt thoughts with us:

To say I was moved by it is a gross understatement. As I scrolled down the piece, I saw many of our old and dear friends, and was so moved by the comparisons and the memories of the brave young pilots they were to the old warriors we see today. When I scrolled to the picture of my husband, I just burst into tears. His portrait, as so many of the others, looked through his eyes and into his soul…to the thrills and the tears, to the joy and the heartbreak of those days flying that wonderful machine in the most difficult air war ever waged.

These reunions are special in ways few people even realize. I have been going for a long time, and one of the things I have observed is that no one…not wives, nor children, nor parents, nor friends…truly can understand what those guys faced in combat during that war. They alone can truly know each other…the very young men they were, how they felt about everything involved in that war, how they all loved that particular airplane, and the comradeship and respect of the men they are today. I think it is one of the most important things they do…slap each other on the back, catch up on kids and grandkids, and be able to know that the men in these reunions truly KNOW them.

So while it might be easy to mistake stoicism for a lack of opinion or an absence of emotion, a few minutes in their presence and a good look through the camera, provided a sea change of perspective.

Revealed

As a photographer, I am comfortable looking for what needs to be communicated in the architecture and life found in faces and places. What I initially saw was a group of men bonded by experiences that only they understand, so much of it a glimpse into the worst of humanity.

Yet it’s as though the solemn reality of what they did, saw and lost, allows them to cherish the good stuff. Observing them and their wives, taking that closer look I could see how valuable that is, where it fits in their stories.

Anthony Cushenberry

The Final Product

While I have many personal projects under my belt, I can say that Over War has been one of the most in-depth thus far; evolving from what I had envisioned as a series of Air Force pilot portraits to a project that — fifty years later — ultimately gives voice to these men who had a unique vantage point on the Vietnam war — an airborne perspective as they flew over the conflict below.

During this process, we’ve also been fortunate to cross paths with a number of people who are working to ensure that the individual stories and first-person accounts of these men who put themselves in harm’s way are being told. Because many of the pilots did not speak about their experiences when they returned; and it seems because few had asked and even fewer were interested, we’ve come to understand that information is difficult to source. These first-person accounts are invaluable.

And while there are not many Thunderchiefs left that can give us a window through which to view and learn from their experiences, we believe it is important that we are careful stewards of their stories, that we do what we can to make sure they are able to speak their truths, to help us and generations to come, accurately view the war.

You can view the Over War project and find the credits here.

About the author: Cade Martin is a storytelling photographer who splits his time between the East and West Coasts creating images for editorial, advertising, fashion, and lifestyle clients. The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author. You can find more of Martin’s work on his website, Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. This article was also published here.

from Photography News https://petapixel.com/2018/09/11/portraits-of-thunderchiefs-the-rolling-thunder-pilots-of-the-vietnam-war/

[amongthegraham]

You Really Got a Cargo Hold on Me

I have a confession to make.

Wait, that makes it sound like I’m ashamed. Let’s call it a proclamation instead.

I LOVE CARGO SHORTS!

I’ve been wearing cargo shorts for twenty years now, but something unfortunate happened last summer. I suddenly had to defend wearing cargo shorts.

I had no idea the style of shorts had supposedly gone out of fashion overnight, but everyone in my life certainly informed me.

If memory serves me correctly, I believe it was my mother-in-law who first made a snarky comment about my beloved cargo shorts. Caught off-guard, I thought to myself, “Why is this woman, whose about to retire, making fun of my fashion?” As someone in their 30’s, I’m the first to admit I’m definitely out of touch with the trends, but there’s no way someone almost double my age is hipper than me, right?

Then, my wife jumped in with the teasing. She watches “Project Runway,” which gives her an insider’s look into the do’s and don’ts of fashion so perhaps there was some truth behind this fashion-bomb that had just been dropped on me.  

Next, my sister-in-law chimed in and so did her boyfriend (now fiancé). The whole group pointed out that my cargo shorts were strikingly similar to my father-in-law’s, an innocent bystander, and then the fashion posse unanimously laughed uncontrollably as if Andrew Dice Clay was in the corner telling jokes. 

(cargos are a must while hiking)

Now, I’ve never been one to sheepishly follow the trends, and therefore, undaunted, I continued rocking my cargos. However, the berating continued as even more hecklers targeted me.

My friends also received the fashion update because they too started ridiculing my cargo shorts. The fact that I was apparently the only one on earth that hadn’t been informed about my fashion faux pas made me feel like I was in an episode of “The Twilight Zone.” Befuddled by the continued revelation, I was left asking myself “WTF?” By the way, that acronym stands for “what the fashion” in case your mind went somewhere else.  

Considering we were having a professional family portrait taken on vacation last summer, I agreed, after many pleas from the wife, to purchase some non-cargo shorts, which I still wear today when an occasion calls for dressier attire. However, when it comes to day-to-day summer wear, I still proudly sport cargo shorts 99% of the time.

Aside from legitimately liking the way they look, I also find cargo shorts utilitarian. Every single time I leave the house I take my wallet, cellphone, and car keys. Cargo shorts make carrying these items incredibly comfortable. When I carry the same items in dress pants or jeans, I constantly feel them rubbing against my body so I really do look forward to warm weather for this reason alone.

As I said earlier, I have three pairs of non-cargo shorts, all different brands, but the one thing they all have in common is ridiculously small pockets. When I sit, my cellphone and keys will definitely slide out of my right and left pockets. Even worse, when I sit to use the bathroom, if you know what I mean, I have to hold onto the back pocket when I pull my shorts up to make sure my wallet doesn’t also plop into the toilet. And, before you try and point out that I must have the same issue with pants and jeans, let me just stop you in your tracks; all of my pants and Levi’s jeans have much deeper pockets than my three non-cargo shorts.

(yes, there is an umbrella in that cargo pocket!)

As just a regular guy, I’ve always found cargo shorts very resourceful. For example, when I attend a concert, I fold the t-shirt I inevitably buy into a tiny square and place it in a cargo pocket. This allows me to have my hands free the entire show. More people should try this, especially those that immediately put on their new shirt over what they are already wearing.  That’s a huge pet peeve of mine.

Now that I’m a dad, I’m a bigger fan of cargo shorts than when I was just a regular guy. My cargo shorts allow me to functionally and comfortably hold my cellphone, keys, wallet, Kleenex, hand wipes, a couple of toys, a snack, and antibacterial liquid. Pre potty-trained, I could also cart around a diaper, diaper wipes, a pacifier, and change of clothes for my little dude. You see, cargo shorts keep me from the awful alternative: a murse (man purse).

(my cargos fulfill his needs)

It really is a shame when something is abruptly determined cool or not cool and people blindly accept it. Remember tight-rolling jeans and trucker-hats? Since fashion is so cyclical, there’s a chance that cargo shorts will already be popular again when this article comes out. However, if that doesn’t happen, I say wear what you want and don’t worry about what other people think.

P.S. I do not condone wearing what you want if your style includes Crocs, fleece jackets when it’s between 70 and 75 degrees, socks with sandals, skinny jeans/pants for men, or stocking caps in summer.