#also i need to know what article that comes from

[yournewfriendshouse]

as an artist I’m well aware that my art is often going to be interpreted in a million ways that I never conceived of, and some of them would be interpretations that I loathe and find fundamentally wrong. but I can’t control how people interpret my work. people will be interpreting it before it’s even finished. in art school and when I make proposals to be included in projects, people interpret them before they are even started.

but I create my work knowing that I’m just one artist making work in a long history of other works, in so many different disciplines. I’m just saying one thing in a massive conversation with millions of voices.

and so to hear people arguing that the best way to interpret a text or artwork is to completely disregard the creator’s context is super ignorant and just fucking wild to me.

you don’t need to know every artist and author and philosopher and news article that I consulted in my research for a piece but you should absolutely look at any artwork knowing there is a context.

you should look at every work knowing that there is context. every photograph you see was shot in one direction and not another, and what is in focus within that chosen frame is done on purpose. they chose which camera to use, which lens to use, how much light (information) is let through that lens…and it’s the same with every single creative discipline.

authors make a thousand decisions, choosing what thoughts and details and concepts to leave in their work, and what to take out. or what they never intended to include.

and then there are subconscious, instinctive decisions that we make that are shaped by our experiences and our paradigms. we aren’t unbiased. our creative impulses aren’t pure or untouched by bigotry or wrong thinking, and so acting like work can be wholly separated from the creator is wishful thinking.

often looking at the context also enriches your interpretation of their work. Frida Kahlo’s work is more wonderful when you understand the time and place she was creating from. her political situation and views. and then she went to paris and was working alongside people like Dali and other names we all know, ans they had their own political views that were distinctly european.

but then someone might say ‘kahlo was appropriating indigenous culture with her hair and dress, so I’m just going to ignore what she was coming from entirely’ … and what???? you’re going to enjoy her biographical works without thinking about the complex life she lived? that’s a fucking miserable thought quite frankly.

like it’s not illegal to do that but you’re going to be very disrespected by a lot of people

the biggest loss I feel when you disregard an author’s context, an author’s humanity, is that you miss out on an opportunity to learn.

not just from the author’s wisdom but also from their mistakes. and also from other people’s points of view and experiences, because the best way to interpret a work is to discuss it with other people.

art isn’t supposed to be experienced in a vacuum. it never was.

[honeytonedhottie]

honey's it girl magazine december edition⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🎀

welcome back to honeys it girl magazine, this is the december catalog. get ready for the inside scoop on data that i've collected, things i've learned/started doing, and just general info like that organized in kind of a teen-magazine inspired fashion. this months catalog has an article written by the LOVELY @osculum-frombee. i just wanna start off by saying THANK YOU all for supporting the magazine and my blog this year, this is theee it girls magazine and without further ado lets just get into it.

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT ;

hey everyone! recently its come to my attention that a lot of you guys are advising me to create a sub stack account and so i did. on substack there will be a paid subscription to read the it girls magazine, BUT there are some things i want to tell u guys about regarding this magazine...💬🎀

WHAT ABOUT THE MAGAZINE ON TUMBLR? ;

you will still get an amazing it-girls magazine every month on tumblr absolutely free! the only difference between the it girls magazine on tumblr and the it girls magazine on substack is that on substack the magazine will be exclusive and include the following...💬🎀

♡ early access

♡ downloadable issues

♡ subscriber shout-outs

♡ guest article opportunities if u want to write something for the magazine

♡ collaborations potentially 🙈

♡ longer articles in general so if u like the longer articles and if u wanna read more than the exclusive version is def for you

the it girls magazine on this platform will include the same content as the magazine on substack! except on substack it'll be more in depth and include perks mentioned above. its basically the magazine y'all get here, but upgraded ✨

WHY YOU SHOULD SUPPORT MY SUBSTACK ;

for just $5 a month, you’ll get all the extra goodies that make honeys it girls magazine even more special! think early access to issues, exclusive behind-the-scenes content, and fun extras like shopping guides and downloads. plus, your support means the world to me—it helps me keep creating the content you love and dream up even more cool stuff for you. it’s like joining our little vip club where you get all the insider perks and help the magazine grow! 💕

as of right now im still working out the kinks of my magazine on substack so for todays catalog you guys will be getting the exclusive version that way u guys can know what its like! if u have any questions at all ur welcome to ask in the comments/submit an ask. i hope to see you all there but until then enjoy the experience 💻🎀

ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS TO BE GLAMOROUS ;

for this holiday season lets set the scene with "mariah carey’s “all i want for christmas is you”, your wearing a sparkly dress and looking as beautiful as you always do ✨ looking like the ultimate holiday dream! thats the energy that we wanna emulate during this holiday season and we’ll get more into that later on in this catalog. 

no but seriously, all i want for christmas is to be more fabulous and glamorous. as i was writing my christmas wishlist with my fluffy pink pen, i even made pink hot chocolate to set the mood (recipe will be shared later on) and i came to the realization that aside from the material aspects of a hyper feminine glamorous christmas, the vibe also needed to match. 

glamour is about the way that you carry yourself. so, while we’ll definitely be purchasing our holiday wishlists, make sure that we’re keeping up with our self care rituals and in fact, pampering ourselves more because we are FABULOUS and we should treat ourselves as such. now, lets unwrap all the ways you can dominate this season like the it girl you are. 

WHAT MADE YOU AN IT GIRL THIS YEAR ;

now that we’re in december i wanna track it back and do some reflection on our year just like we talked about in the november catalog. every it girl has her moments and im sure that this year has been full of them for you so just take a second to acknowledge your moments form the year. 

for me, my biggest moments this year include making the decision to take myself more seriously because, i feel like i take myself quite seriously already but i haven’t been applying myself giving myself my all like i KNOW i can so making that choice this year to truly step into myself was def my biggest moment. 

your it girl moments also dont have to be something necessarily ground-breaking, it can be as simple as you finding your signature scent (hint: if it smells like warm vanilla gourmand, it’s the one) or as ground breaking as reaching your health goals, getting on honor-roll for your school, or making big doll dollars! 💰💖💸 whatever it is, YOU did that. reflect and celebrate yourself. 

PINK HOT CHOCOLATE RECIPE ;

pink hot chocolate is the perfect winter drink! plus its super easy to make so im going to be giving the recipe here so that you can enjoy a cup of it while you continue reading the it girl magazine. put on ur hello kitty aprons and lets get straight into the recipe! you’ll need the following ; 

♡ 4 cups of milk ♡ 1/2 cups of white chocolate chips  ♡ 1 tablespoon of vanilla extract 

so what your gonna do is your gonna heat up 4 cups of milk in a pot and then add in ur white chocolate chips, mixing them together until smooth. then you’ll add the vanilla extract and the red food coloring and stir to distribute the color...💬🎀

i like to enjoy mine with whipped cream and pink and white mini marshmallows! now that you have your beverage we can continue on with the it girls magazine. 

HOLIDAY SELF CARE ROUTINE ;

one of my favorite things to do are over the top self care routines! i love to feel glamorous and girly and take good care of myself meticulously especially during winter break because its easy to just rot and fall into a lethargic haze so hopefully this holiday self care routine motivates you and gives you something to do if your bored.

use a holiday themed bath bomb from lush

use a deep conditioning hair mask, put your hair up and read a chic magazine (like this one, duh)

its all about the experience so light a yummy candle while your doing self care

use a foot scrub of brown sugar honey and lemon -> for extra glam paint ur nails

moisturize your body with a shimmery lotion so you sparkle like a holiday queen

bubble baths!!

WHAT THE IT GIRLS ARE LISTENING TO ;

one of my favorite releases this december has to be twice and megan thee stallions collar strategy! the song is so vibrant and bubbly and i absolutely loved the music video also. we can't talk about december music without talking about the queen of christmas herself miss mariah carey and her christmas album 'merry christmas' some songs from my christmas playlist are ->

♡ santa tell me - by ariana grande ♡ all i want for christmas is you - by mariah carey ♡ last christmas - by wham! ♡ doughnut - twice ♡ a nonsense christmas - sabrina carpenter ♡ december - ariana grande ♡ when christmas comes - by mariah carey and john legend

THE ADVICE COLUMN ;

Q ; “Hey, I recently bought almond oil but don’t know what to use it for. I have heard of using it for hair, skin, body, etc. but could you elaborate on it? Also if it’s ok with u could this be in your magazine which I love btw! Your the best!” 💬

A ; hi anonie! so almond oil is super duper versatile. you can use it in a hair mask for shine and hydration. you can add a couple drops to your body lotion for skin hydration. you can also mix it with sugar and make ur own homemade body scrub. from the research i did, its also great for cuticle care and soothing dry areas like elbows and knees. thanks for loving the magazine! 

DECEMBER TRENDS ;

i first wanna talk about the FASHION trends for december 2024 because it’s caught my eye. according to harpersbazzar “this season is all about daytime party clothes, o blood office attire, and updated english country classics.”

reoccurring themes in december fashion are all about finding ways to indulge in warmth and texture during the dark winter days. a texture that i’ve seen used a lot in december fashion is velvet and im going to talk about this a lot because it’s so super glamorous to me and resonates with me more as opposed to other textures that are trending like suede and corduroy.

velvet is so rich and perfect for december because of the cold weather. velvet to me just SCREAMS chic and luxurious. another texture i’ve always loved for the colder seasons is furs! miu mius first look from the fall 2024 fashion show set the stage for how popular chocolate browns are this month. chocolate brown is the chicest shade of cocoa ✨

december fashion also incorporates lots of layering because of the weather, but to master this you must layer FASHIONABLY. layering is so fun because we can really play with textures and colors. some tips to do this are as follows…💬🎀

mix textures to add dimension and interest

play around with proportions (for example big fur coat + tiny silky dress. or puffer jackets with a fashionable pair of jeans)

statement outerwear pieces!!

moving away from the fashion point of view on december trends, i wanna talk about the “can’t pay the mortgage” trend of december. so essentially you’d tell your significant other that you can’t pay the rent/mortgage, all while knowing that they have never payed for the mortgage. 

so naturally, the husbands after hearing this they’re confused and some even offended that their wife would even have to think about paying the mortgage. i think that this trend is really cute, and its a harmless prank and its really beautiful to see women in equitable relationships where they’re being taken care of and happy. I LOVE TO SEE WOMEN WINNN. 

HUNNY I CANT PAY THE MORTGAGE (BY THE LOVELY @osculum-frombee) ;

For December trends let’s go out with some advice that could better you in 2025, relationships. Let’s talk about love and expectations we all experience.

The perfect trend for this is the recent “Can’t pay the mortgage trend” where wives or partners tell their husbands they can’t pay the mortgage and see their reactions. This trend was originally done by 100% couples where the man paid all the bills in the household, or couples where the man paid half the bills (like the mortgage and perhaps something else) while the wife paid other bills but then 50/50 couples started participating in the trend and the differences in reaction was… shocking to say the least?

Reactions ;

The reactions betweeen the 50/50 men and the 100% men were obviously very different, but the question is just how different?...💬🎀

The men who paid most or all of the bills in the household almost immediately laughed or joked about their wife and how she doesn’t pay the bills anyway, some were confused and looked at their wife like “Babe..what?🤨” while some played along and pretend like they had no idea what they were going to do but reassured their wife they would handle it (my personal faves) 

While the 50/50 men would have a DRASTICALLY different reaction these men would either blank out or rage out at the idea their wife or girlfriend couldn’t handle it, the guys who blanked out asking their wife is she could take overtime or saying they didn’t know what to do while the ones who raged out went to cursing or degrading their wives. 

These reactions show perfectly what you do and DONT want in a relationship. The way your partner reacts and treats you is everything and there’s a difference between the way a provider would react and a stingy man would.

The trend isn’t about saying you should date a man who pays 100% of the bills if you don’t want to, or that all 50/50 men are trash. Like all things this requires PERSPECTIVE and knowing what  YOU personally WANT 

In times like this with the economy there are people out there who can’t do it with just one income alone, and that doesn’t mean you or your partner is a peice of crap for having to split the bills to make it...💬🎀

A provider man ;

You want to- no NEED to ensure that regardless of how much money your partner or you make, that whoever your dating is a provider man, who is more focused on taking care of you then you taking care of him, a problem solver who can save money for a rainy day, there are men out there who do 50/50 but ensure they take care of their partners, worship the ground they walk on and PROVIDE, do their best to take the stress off their partners shoulders while also taking care of household issues, men who put effort in emotionally and understand that relationships are a 2 way street, aren’t stingy about spending on their loved ones and treat their partners like the rare gemstone they are. THATS the type of man you want, whether  he be filthy rich with generational wealth or a man who gives it his all either way.

There are 50/50 men out there who save money and if their partner ever said they couldn’t do their part of the bills this month he would move mountains to ensure his partners stressed was alleviated and create a solution to the problem,  that could  be him working overtime or taking money out of the savings or covering that months expenses himself if he can, he wouldn’t yell or argue, or curse profanities , he would help and ensure they were taken care of. 

Emotional matters ;

There are men who may seem like the better choice, men who are rich and perfect on paper, but it’s not about how much money your partner has it’s how they react to the things they cannot buy. If you’re partner throws money and expensive bags at you without a second thought but when it comes to getting to know you and understand you, gaining your trust, talking through emotional issues and you trying to communicate to them they shun you out, get mad or dismissive then this isn’t the partner for you, wether you be man or women. You may think someone can buy things like your trust, effort, energy and genuine love but those are things that can’t ever be bought these things take experience, time spent with that person, arguments and makeups, it takes learning and growing to  trust that person to love them.  having a partner who doesn’t put effort in emotionally or mentally  isn’t having a partner at all it’s simply being occupied or “busied” by someone else who won’t put forth a real connection with you. 

What you want vs what you’re told to ;

I saw a video of a women saying her and her husband go 50/50 they use 1 salary for bills and expenses and use the other for savings, she said she likes it this way, she has her bachelors and her masters degree and chose not to quit working after becoming pregnant she listed points that were SO important

She mentioned how she liked having the fridge stocked, how she like vacationing whenever she wanted, she liked buying what she wanted and not struggling. The point I’m making is that it’s all about what you want and what feels right for you, but also about how your partner treats you. If you decide to  go 50/50 on the financial labor and are  with a man who doesn’t care about you or is very “dusty” you’re going to be unhappy and unfulfilled but its also the same if you’re dating a man who pays 100% yet still ignores every other need in a relationship like mental and emotional, youll be unfulfilled and unhappy. 

If you’re going 50/50 make sure you're dating a man who’s clean and willing and likes to help around the house, who can clean or cook and will put effort into all aspects of this relationship. If you want to work but be 100% taken care of and save the money you make or spend it freely it’s your life, if you want to be a stay at home mom or parent or just want to stay at home and be 100% taken care of it’s your life, if you want to have your fantasy “the way of the househusband” life where you work and pay all the bills and your husband stays at home, cooks and cleans and takes care of everything else than babygirl it’s your life and honestly rock it? 

It’s your life and it shouldn’t be curated to anyone else’s wants or expectations as long as you’re happy fulfilled, with a provider/ problem solver who will move mountains for you be happy. You’re not a roommate for going 50/50 when you’re truly loved and respected in your relationship and your partner  isn’t stingy. Whichever way you want your relationship to go make sure you find a partner who is on the same page and can give you that, don’t try to force a clown to be a king because then the entire kingdom will end up a circus, don’t chase or fight with a man who doesn’t want to give you what you want or doesn’t view you as worth it or cannot afford to, find a partner who is aligned in your ideas and values and is entirely pleased to provide you what it is you wish. 

The beauty of the trend ;

While some people do scrutinize women who are in a healthy 50/50 relationship or women who want to go to work and still be provided for. It’s not about that this trend is about showing women what’s possible, that providing 100% for a man will always lead to you being depleted and drained in every way possible, that the better and healthier relationship is out there and that there are men who would do anything to be with you and keep you and let their actions show as such not just financially but emotionally. Women have said that this trend has shown them their husbands or partners aren’t worth it and that it’s opened them up to a better way of living and has shown them their better off single than with a man who depletes them. 

This is about empowering women and I notice this trend goes hand in hand or is the sister to the “women in male fields trend” a trend that showcased women acting like men and talking about what they’d experienced with them, that trend was women saying they were done with that treatment and this trend is about showing women they can do better. 

Conclusion ;  

Going into 2025, focus on yourself- find out what it is you want.  

And if there’s anything you take away from this segment let it be that: 

It’s about what you want 

50/50 doesn’t make either of you bad

Better is always out there

You are the love of your life 

Thank you for reading my first ever segment in the It girls magazine💕💖

WHICH HOLIDAY IT GIRL AM I? ; 

are y'all ready to discover what type of it girl you are this holiday season? take this quiz to figure out which festive vibe suits your personality. lets see how ur sleighing this season…💬🎀

1. your ideal holiday party look is:

a) a sparkling, gold sequin-covered dress that’s sure to steal the spotlight 

b) a chic velvet jumpsuit with fluffy details and elegant accessories 

c) a fluffy sweater with a touch of holiday glam — think sparkly headbands and cute socks 

d) a glamorous satin gown in red or emerald green, paired with glamorous makeup and red bottoms

2. what’s your go-to holiday drink?

a) sparkling champagne or a festive glittery mocktail 

b) a warm, spiced apple cider 

c) pink hot cocoa with extra marshmallows, topped with whipped cream 

d) a luxurious holiday latte with hints of peppermint or caramel 

3. your favorite way to spend christmas eve is:

a) attending lavish holiday parties, and kissing under mistletoes 

b) enjoying a candlelit dinner with close friends or family, and watching cozy christmas movies 

c) baking holiday cookies and wrapping gifts while sipping on hot chocolate

d) getting all glammed up for a special dinner and exchanging glamorous gifts with ur girls

4. when decorating for the holidays, you:

a) i go ALL out with sparkly lights, glittery ornaments and a chic color scheme for pinkmas 

b) elegant neutral decor with touches of greenery, its classic duh

c) a cozy vibe with diy ornaments, fairy lights, and plaid everything 

d) love classic red, green, and white with vintage-style baubles for a traditional yet glamorous feel 

5. what's your holiday music playlist vibe?

a) mariah carey’s “all i want for christmas is you” on repeat 

b) classic jazz and soft holiday tunes 

c) cozy acoustic christmas songs and christmas movie soundtracks 

d) holiday hits that make you want to dance like wham and micheal bublé 

6. what's your holiday beauty look?

a) bold red lips, highlighter that shines like snow, and glittery eyeshadow 

b) soft, glowing skin with a natural glam look — think minimal but chic 

c) a cozy but cute look with a bright red lip and simple, glowing skin 

d) smokey eyes, dramatic lashes, think holiday bimbo

7. your dream holiday getaway is:

a) a glamorous snowy cabin retreat with hot cocoa and a warm fire, and complete with an evening of glitzy christmas parties

b) a cozy winter escape in the mountains with scenic views and a fireplace 

c) a festive city escape, with christmas markets, hot chocolate, and cozy cafes 

d) a luxurious tropical resort, giving beachside holiday vibe

results:

mostly a’s: the sparkling diva ✨ you’re all about the glam and sparkle this holiday season! from dazzling sequins to luxurious accessories, you know how to shine brighter than the christmas lights. you love the glitz and glamour of the season and aren’t afraid to make a statement — just like the holiday parties you attend!

mostly b’s: the elegant sophisticate 🥂 you bring class and sophistication to everything you do this holiday season. whether it’s a cozy dinner or a quiet night by the fire, you exude an effortless elegance. this holiday season, you’ll be enjoying luxurious simplicity — think velvet, classic red lips, and timeless decor.

mostly c’s: the cozy glam girl 💖 you’re all about warmth, coziness, and making the season special in your own way. whether it’s baking cookies, wrapping gifts, or cuddling up with your favorite holiday movies, you embrace all things festive and chic. this holiday, it’s about combining comfort and glamour for the perfect holiday vibe!

mostly d’s: the classic glamazon 💅🏼 you’re the definition of classic holiday glamour! whether you’re rocking a satin gown or glamming up your beauty look, you always bring sophistication and style to the season. for you, it’s all about elegant traditions, bold accessories, and a glamorous holiday look that can’t be ignored.

[docholligay]

HLF: how do i check for cold (or hot, i guess) spots in my oven? is there a tool or do you just have to sacrifice some cookies to the fire?

I TAKE NO CREDIT FOR THIS. I READ THIS ARTICLE ON KING ARTHUR BAKING. THEY ARE AN EXCELLENT FUCKING RESOURCE FOR EVERYTHING AND ALSO EMPLOYEE OWNED BUY THINGS FROM THEM.

The toast test! Once I learned about this, i was so fucking mad that I didn't think about it myself--all you need to do is sacrifice a loaf of bread.

Ovens are stupid. They are giant boxes of metal that get hot. And if you have a gas oven, they are even worse--the heat doesn't even COME IN equally, ever. So normally, in an electric oven at least, the outside edges of your oven get hotter than the center. You can use this to your advantage: I cook something that needs top browning on a rack set closer to the top, pies closer to the bottom, and for pizza, when I want to make a REALLY GOOD pizza, like if I have guests and I want them to think I'm the most special girl, I set one rack on top, one of bottom, cook it on the bottom for a crisp crust and then hit it with the broiler on top for like two minutes and boom holy fuck i am a god.

ANYWAY, to answer your actual question.

You buy a loaf of shitty bread--I got a 99 cent loaf from the day-old section--preheat your oven to 350F/180C* and then you arrange it around your oven. Like so. Or, if you're like me, you used the whole loaf, but I didn't want to buy a loaf just to take a picture of something I've already done, so I stole this one from KAF (I love you guys!)

then you bake until the center pieces are gorgeous, a medium golden brown. Then you'll know, if that's what happens in the ideal placement, what is going to happen in less-ideal placements.

I re-ran the test preheating my oven with convection and then cooking on normal, it had more even heating. I don't necessarily recommend this unless you like to sometimes get nuts.

*ALSO BUY AN OVEN THERMOMETER. Your preheating sensor is more than likely lying to you. You can get cheapass ones but right now the Thermoworks smoke is 50 GODDAMN PERCENT OFF because they are on America's Test Kitchen 5 days of deals. They say it's for barbecue but the clip works the same in a smoker or an oven. And also it comes with a meat probe! So, double duty. (I make nothing from Thermoworks I wish they would send me free product for all I promote them *big eyes at Thermoworks guy)

[epsdoll]

hey babes! can you write about bde (big daddy elvis) where he and reader are divorced but they still yearn for each other and it ends in smut?

of course! I’ve never wrote smut before so I’ll have to try my best, I hope it’s okay!

warnings: crying, mentions of being hospitalised and pills, fingering, oral (f receiving)

it was late at night, probably around 2 am and you couldn’t fall asleep. You were wandering around your house in your nightie, the floors were cold on your bare feet. You couldn’t help this feeling, like something was wrong. You really couldn’t place your finger on it but ever since that article came out about Elvis saying he was hospitalised for exhaustion, you knew something was wrong. Sure you and Elvis were divorced but you loved him dearly, you also knew he still adored you. Some nights you’d yearns to feel his arms enveloping your little body again, the way his somehow calloused but soft hands would hold your delicate ones as you walked together, the warm feeling in your belly when he looked at you. you missed it but you made a choice, the marriage was doing no good for any of you. Always arguing over you being too worried about him and his pills, the girls on the road. Even though he’s reassure you you were the only one for him. you made a choice which was you and Elvis were better off divorced, it hurt, it really did but it needed to be done.

all of a sudden you hear your phone ringing from your bedroom, you slowly approach the phone and pick it up, fiddling with the phone cord. That’s when you immediately hear Elvis’s soft sniffles, he didn’t know you had picked up yet, that’s until you talk

“elvis?” his sniffling suddenly stopped, he always did this, he always tried hiding his vulnerability, all the expectations that were pushed onto him made him afraid, afraid to be open and vulnerable, scared that the person would immediately go tell the press.

“darlin’? I-I’m real sorry to call this late. But I can’t do it no more, darlin’ baby I need to see you..I need to hold you, I’m so lost- so damn lost without ya” you didn’t know what to say, he couldn’t come over, you knew you wouldn’t be able to hold yourself back if he came but you felt your mouth betray your brain as you say

“please- come over then, you know the address” and before you knew it Elvis had hung up. Elvis practically ran to his car, drove through the mob of fans at his gate that were even there in the middle of the night. And only 20 minutes later you heard a knock on your door.

you slowly open the door, not knowing what to expect of him but he just stood in the doorway, completely still. He looked tired, exhausted even, he had gained some weight over the years which a lot of people criticised but it suited him in your opinion. He just stood there almost looking at you with a sad awe on his face. A minute passed by until he suddenly stepped forward and wrapped his big arms around you, the familiar warmth you had yearned for surrounded you, his scent. The embrace started off like as if he was squeezing you, checking to see if you were really real, holding you tight as his hands were all over your back, waist and arms. He needed to feel you. suddenly his southern voice rang in your ear

“darlin’ I need you, I’ve needed you ever since ya left, I’m so lost without ya- I need ta feel your body on mine again- these pills they don’t have no more, I can’t sleep. I need my angel” his angel. He had used to call you his angel when you were together due to your soft smile, big eyes and radiating glow. Suddenly his lips were on yours and his roaming hands ended on your ass. The hug grew more intense and almost sexual, yeah well thats when you felt the bulge in his pants, pressing up against you.

“elvis-“ you try, it’s not like you didn’t want him but you were divorced. Once again your body deceived your brain. You wrap your arms around him neck and he groans.

before you knew it you found yourself in your bed with Elvis on top of you, his fingers working on getting your nightie off. “Darlin’ i need ya so bad, I need ya live the air a breathe-“

he mumbles against your neck as he slides your nightie off leaving you in your light pink lace bra and panties. “Goddamn” he whispers softly to himself. God he’s missed this, he still loves you, there’s no denying it but this is a one time thing, he has to remind himself..you’re divorced

The minutes leading up to you both being completely naked was spent kissing each part of skin you could reach, touching, grinding and whispering. Suddenly you feel Elvis kissing down from your neck to your collarbone, then your chest and then your stomach, stopping right over your pussy. “Honey, can I? Please”

you don’t even say anything, you just nod and tangle your fingers in his fluffy jet black hair, pushing his face forward a bit, he grins softly against your pussy before getting to work, he’s missed this, you, your body, your pussy. He sure hadn’t lost his bedroom talent, his lips press onto your clit, suckling slightly as his finger finds its way to your cunt, sliding it right in, it was easy with how wet you were. You could feel the coil in your stomach tightening, your legs wanting to close..and they do, your legs shake and then close around his head and he laughs against your cunt, his deep laugh vibrating into you. Not long after, you moan his name almost pornographiclly as you squirt on his face, he opens your legs back up as he raises his head from your pussy, a stupid and proud grin on his pussy drunk face, some of his sideburn was even covered in your juices.

all of a sudden you just start laughing, this was absolutely ridiculous. Your ex husband just ate you out after not seeing eachother for months. He crawls onto you, burying his face in your neck as he also start laughing, his deep, rich, southern laugh filling the room.

[wedriftlikelonelyplanets]

oscar talking about his odd moments of rage, they’re definitely all when lando says no as he’s just about to come

SDFSDFSDFSDFSDFDFSDF

YOU'RE SO RIGHT ANON.

Oscar's all cool calm and collected until he really wants to come and Lando denies him for the 6th time in a week.

[deoidesign]

Wearing your boyfriend's jacket

[samaspic31]

You can’t make this shit up you click on an article about how hamas hostages were treated (for the sake of checking yourself on bias and with the intention to verify it with multiple sources) and the headline will be « return from the horrors of hamas » and then the text is actually « they treated me rather well just didn’t have much food and i was in danger due to Israeli airstrikes” You know the shit the government claims necessary to rescue them. This world is bullshit

[hyacinthsdiamonds]

It's been pretty consistent for nearly 20 years but red bull bts lineup is definitely getting shaked up one way or another this season...

[secondpersonpoetry]

hi! heard the released “Merry Christmas, Please Don’t Call” (which i’ve seen you’ve heard live, if i’m not mistaken!!) this morning and i don’t know if there’s really a particular vibe/dynamic/ship hrpf-wise (personally haven’t yet been able to put my finger on it) that quite relates but the lyrics have been rotating in my head all day and i was wondering if you had any thoughts? hope you have a good one! <3

OH ANON HAVE I EVER SEEN IT LIVE!!! and the second that song came out i zoomed it straight into my fic playlist and unfortunately there are so many guys this could be. right now the one that's resonating is, of course, the golden boy and his haunted ghost themselves: mcstrome.

i am thinking about connor, specifically, after the stanley cup final. that game seven. how angry he was, how loud the silence when they told him he won the conn smythe. how close he's come before and again and again lost. there's nobody else to blame but himself. he's in the empty room and he knows why (1)

at!! your best!!! you were magic!!! oh, golden boy. connor the anointed, of course. at the very beginning of his career we always knew he was something special and who wouldn't have fallen in love with him? weren't all of us a little bit dylan strome in awe of the generational talent? we were all bathed in radiant light just by being in the vicinity (2)

don't even tell 'em that you know me breaks my heart (3). in terms of building a narrative i think i've said before there is a universe where connor/dylan were together before the draft and to protect both of them, dylan breaks up with him. connor says i love you and dylan says i don't. because he doesn't, you know? he loved connor. he loved davo. he can't be in love with connor mcdavid, first overall pick of the edmonton oilers. i'd rather be hurt forever than have to watch us try to make this work and destroy us.

and after connor mcdavid left the otters, dylan strome captained them to a memorial cup win. what a haunted home, eh? to be captain of the team you and your best friend were on, only now he's left you? don't call me to tell me about your rookie season with the oilers--we both know about your broken collarbone. don't call me to tell about becoming the youngest captain in franchise history when i stepped into the shoes of your captaincy here. don't call me. (4)

narratively: dylan's the one who broke connor's heart and his own but by god it wasn't easy. we both know what happened, you went first overall. please don't make this harder on me. please don't call.

this verse can be about the weight of dylan having to live up to connor's standards and always being measured by him. i would just like to bring up the connor stepping stone chart for absolutely no reason as well (5)

we are, at long last, at the potential future of now: dylan strome, happy, smiling, thriving on the washington capitals. connor, on the oilers. i'm not yours, dylan can say. haven't been for a long time. it took some time but i made this. please don't call and ruin this for me, stay out of my life. i don't want you or need you (6)

[p.s. this took a while because when i received this ask i was a) immediately possessed to write this verse by verse breakdown i had never thought of before and then b) immediately plagued by the idea of making you a little graphic (above the read more) and finally got to do it after banging out all the actual lyric thoughts two (?) weeks ago. emerging two and a half hours later from the fugue state of GIMP with 37 layers in this bad boy hope you enjoy!!!]

[crossbackpoke-check]

Fixed point (mathematics) // The History of Perspective // "Point of Disappearance", Dennis Held // How the Hughes hockey family stays grounded // Fixed Point Photography-- // "Portrait of A.", Tung-Hui Hu // Mic'd Up | Hughes NHL 25 cover shoot // "Burnt Norton", T.S. Eliot // "Circuitry", Janine Joseph // Bruce Bennett // Nick Wass // from obedience [maybe one day, during a point in time], kari edwards // Bill Rapai // "Errand Upon Which We Came", Stephanie Strickland // Benchmark (surveying)

art kid luke hughes

[deadpresidents]

"What emerged in two interviews with Trump, and conversations with more than a dozen of his closest advisers and confidants, were the outlines of an imperial presidency that would reshape America and its role in the world. To carry out a deportation operation designed to remove more than 11 millions people from the country, Trump told me, he would be willing to build migrant detention camps and deploy the U.S. military, both at the border and inland. He would let red states monitor women's pregnancies and prosecute those who violate abortion bans. He would, at his personal discretion, withhold funds appropriated by Congress, according to top advisers. He would be willing to fire a U.S. Attorney who doesn't carry out his order to prosecute someone, breaking with a tradition of independent law enforcement that dates from America's founding. He is weighing pardons for every one of his supporters accused of attacking the U.S. Capitol on Jan. 6, 2021, more than 800 of whom have pleaded guilty or been convicted by a jury. He might not come to the aid of an attacked ally in Europe or Asia if he felt that country wasn't paying enough for its own defense. He would gut the U.S. civil service, deploy the National Guard to American cities as he sees fit, close the White House pandemic-preparedness office, and staff his Administration with acolytes who back his false assertion that the 2020 election was stolen."

-- "How Far Would He Go", TIME Magazine's interviews with Donald Trump, April 30, 2024.

I know we're saturated in coverage of Trump and it's easy (and probably better for our mental health) to usually ignore most of the articles when we see them, especially since he's so full of shit and infuriating. But it's also important to recognize that he is going to be the Republican nominee for President and he could absolutely be elected in November, and if you thought his first term was scary and dangerous, you need to understand that in a second term he's going to have people around him that are better prepared and VERY willing to do the crazy shit that he wants to do to this country. They aren't even hiding the fact that they are seeking vengeance against political opponents whom they feel have wronged them, and are ready to fundamentally dismantle the democratic foundations that are barely holding this country together after nearly 250 years.

Just look at what Trump says about the people who he incited to attack the United States Capitol in an attempt to overturn the results of the 2020 election and halt the peaceful transfer of power that has happened every four years since 1789:

"Trump has sought to recast an insurrectionist riot as an act of patriotism. 'I call them the J-6 patriots,' he say. When I ask whether he would consider pardoning every one of them, he says, 'Yes, absolutely.' As Trump faces dozens of felony charges, including for election interference, conspiracy to defraud the United States, willful retention of national-security secrets, and falsifying business records to conceal hush-money payments, he has tried to turn legal peril into a badge of honor."

Oh, and please note that Trump -- a former President of the United States and possible future President of the United States -- said on the record in these interviews with TIME: "There is a definite antiwhite feeling in the country and that can't be allowed either." We are at a point where political leaders are outright saying that in this country again, and it's because of Donald Trump.

So, take the time to recognize that Trump is straight-up telling us the country we're going to be living in if he wins again in November. And understand that your vote matters -- and WHO you vote for matters -- because, as I've been saying for years now, ELECTIONS HAVE FUCKING CONSEQUENCES.

[ktempestbradford]

I have been on a Willy Wonkified journey today and I need y'all to come with me

It started so innocently. Scrolling Google News I come across this article on Ars Technica:

At first glance I thought what happened was parents saw AI-generated images of an event their kids were at and became concerned, then realized it was fake. The reality? Oh so much better.

On Saturday, event organizers shut down a Glasgow-based "Willy's Chocolate Experience" after customers complained that the unofficial Wonka-inspired event, which took place in a sparsely decorated venue, did not match the lush AI-generated images listed on its official website.... According to Sky News, police were called to the event, and "advice was given."

Thing is, the people who paid to go were obviously not expecting exactly this:

But I can see how they'd be a bit pissed upon arriving to this:

It gets worse.

"Tempest, how could it possibly--"

source of this video that also includes this charming description:

Made up a villain called The Unknown — 'an evil chocolate maker who lives in the walls'

There is already a meme.

Oh yes, the Wish.com Oompa Loompa:

Who has already done an interview!

As bad (and hilarious) as this all is, I got curious about the company that put on this event. Did they somehow overreach? Did the actors they hired back out at the last minute? (Or after they saw the script...) Oddly enough, it doesn't seem so!

Given what I found when poking around I'm legit surprised there was an event at all. Cuz this outfit seems to be 100% a scam.

The website for this specific event is here and it has many AI generated images on it, as stated. I don't think anyone who bought tickets looked very closely at these images, otherwise they might have been concerned about how much Catgacating their children would be exposed to.

Yes, Catgacating. You know, CATgacating!

I personally don't think anyone should serve exarserdray flavored lollipops in public spaces given how many people are allergic to it. And the sweet teats might not have been age appropriate.

Though the Twilight Tunnel looks pretty cool:

I'm not sure that Dim Tight Twdrding is safe. I've also been warned that Vivue Sounds are in that weird frequency range that makes you poop your pants upon hearing them.

Yes, Virginia, these folks used an AI image generator for everything on the website and used Chat GPT for some of the text! From the FAQ:

Q: I cannot go on the available days. Will you have more dates in the future? A: Should there be capacity when you arrive, then you will be able to enter without any problems. In the event that this is not the case, we may ask you to wait a bit.

Fear not, for this question is asked again a few lines down and the answer makes more sense.

Curious about the events company behind this disaster, I took myself over to the homepage of House of Illuminati and I was not disappointed.

I would 100% trust these people to plan my wedding.

This abomination of a website is a badly edited WordPress blog filled with AI art and just enough blog posts to make the casual viewer think that it's a legit business for about 0.0004 seconds.

Their attention to detail is stunning, from how they left up the default first post every WP blog gets to how they didn't bother changing the name on several images, thus revealing where they came from. Like this one:

With the lovely and compact filename "DALL·E-2024-01-30-09.50.54-Imagine-a-scene-where-fantasy-and-reality-merge-seamlessly.-In-the-foreground-a-grand-interactive-gala-is-taking-place-filled-with-elegant-guests-i.png"

"Concept.png" came from the same AI generator that gets text almost, but not quiiiiiite right:

There are a suspicious number of .webp images in the uploads, which makes me think they either stole them from other sites where AI "art" was uploaded or they didn't want to pay for the hi-res versions of some and just grabbed the preview image.

The real fun came when I noticed this filename: Before-and-After-Eventologists-Transformation-Edgbaston-Cricket-Ground-1024x1024-1.jpg and decided to do a Google image search. Friends, you will be shocked to hear that the image in question, found on this post touting how they can transform a boring warehouse into a fun event space, was stolen from this actual event planner.

Even better, this weirdly grainy image?

From a post that claims to be about the preparations for a "Willy Wonka" experience (we'll get to this in a minute), is not only NOT an actual image of anyone preparing anything for Illuminati's event, it is stolen from a YouTube thumbnail that's been chopped to remove the name of the company that actually made this. Here's the video.

If you actually read the blog posts they're all copypasta or some AI generated crap. To the point where this seems like not a real business at all. There's very specific business information at the bottom, but nothing else seems real.

As I said, I'm kinda surprised they put on an event at all. This has, "And then they ran off with all our money!" written all over it. I'm perplexed.

And also wondering when the copyright lawyers are gonna start calling, because...

This post explicitly says they're putting together a "Willy Wonka’s Chocolate Factory Experience" complete with golden tickets.

Somewhere along the line someone must have wised up, because the actual event was called "Willys Chocolate Experience" (note the lack of apostrophe) and the script they handed to the actors about 10 minutes before they were supposed to "perform" was about a "Willy McDuff" and his chocolate factory.

As I was going through this madness with friends in a chat, one pointed out that it took very little prompting to get the free Chat GPT to spit out an event description and such very similar to all this while avoiding copyrighted phrases. But he couldn't figure out where the McDuff came from since it wasn't the type of thing GPT would usually spit out...

Until he altered the prompt to include it would be happening in Glasgow, Scotland.

You cannot make this stuff up.

But truly, honestly, I do not even understand why they didn't take the money and run. Clearly this was all set up to be a scam. A lazy, AI generated scam.

Everything from the website to the event images to the copy to the "script" to the names of things was either stolen or AI generated (aka stolen). Hell, I'd be looking for some poor Japanese visitor wandering the streets of Glasgow, confused, after being jacked for his mascot costume.

HE LIVES IN THE WALLS, Y'ALL.

[scented-morker]

Wearing Enhypen’s clothes

Enha x implied fem reader, established relationship, 945 words (AGAIN), fluffff, jungwons is longer than everyone else’s😬

Heeseung

He is the perpetrator.

Like as soon as you walk in the door he shoves his hoodie onto you

It’s not cute either— your arms get stuck and your hair is messed up and staticky everywhere

But as soon as it’s on he pulls the hood down and looks at you with such a lovesick look even though you look like a gremlin

Every time you stay over he makes you wear his clothes because he just thinks you look so cute

And since his shirts/hoodies are too big on you it makes it easier to sneak his hands up them to hold your bare waist which is his favorite way to cuddle 😔

Jay

At first you were just so impressed with his style that you wanted to be like him 🥺

He though it was so cute when you walked out in one of the outfits he had posted a picture in one day and been like “how do you manage to make this look good 😭”

“Well for starters, the clothes actually fit me” he laughs and ruffles your hair

He likes to get matching outfits so you don’t always have to steal much of his stuff since you probably have a match

But you always end up stealing his accessories

The amount of times he’s complimented your necklace only to realize it was his 😐

You’re lucky he loves you

Likes when you slide his rings onto your fingers while you’re playing with his hands 🥰

Jake

THE KING OF SHARING CLOTHES

He will give you anything that you want from his closet, no questions asked

He loves trying to sneakily add articles of his clothing to your outfits

Like “hey what if you added- I don’t know- a flannel around your waist? Actually look, I’ve already go one right here. Let me put it on you.”

He loves coming home and seeing you in his hoodies or flannels (especially when they’re so long it looks like you aren’t wearing pants 😭)

Refers to his new purchases as “our new jacket” or will text you and ask “do you like this?”

And when you tell him it’s a mens shirt so you wouldn’t wear it he goes “actually, it’s a jake shirt, which means it’s a yn shirt.”

Sunghoon

He’s one to act like he doesn’t like it

But one time when you told him you were cold and he said “sounds like a you problem” you threatened to go get one of the other boys’ hoodie and he got so pouty and mad 😭

Now he always brings an extra one of HIS hoodies whenever you hang out because he doesn’t want you to get it from someone else

Also the type to show up at your house, see your collection of his clothes and tease you about it but then not take them back

And if you EVER tell him you need another one bc the ones you have don’t smell like him anymore—

He’s gonna need three to four business days to recover from that

Sunoo

Another one to refer to his closet as “our closet”

He always asks you to wear his stuff

Like you text him to ask what you should wear for your date and he tells you to just wear anything over and he’d give you something of his to wear

Sharing sweaters 🥺

Like little grandpa sweaters that you thrift somewhere and you guys share them like it’s the sisterhood of the traveling pants or something and send each other little pictures of where you were wearing it

“Today I wore our sweater to the ice cream shop! The guy in front of me in line ordered mint choco and it made me think of you” 🫶

Jungwon

Listen, he’s seen the romcoms— you’ve made him watch enough of them during movie nights to know that people like wearing their boyfriends clothes

He just had no idea how to offer it

Does he just walk up to you one day and say “here, wear this”? Does he take you to the cold section of the grocery store until you shiver and then give it to you?

HE DOESNT KNOW!!!

But one day you two come home from one of your dates and decide to just chill in his bed

Which is cool, except you had dressed a little nicer for the date and your outfit wasn’t exactly made for comfort

“Hey won, do you think I could borrow something to change into? My outfit isn’t very comfy.”

He scolds you at first for not wearing something you’re comfortable in because he’s gonna think you look beautiful no matter what you wear, but eventually gives you a tshirt and pair of shorts to change into

Laughs because you look like Adam Sandler

“I thought this was going to be cute but you look really funny”

Riki

Listen, he loves napping

And napping on you is one of his favorite places

So when your stupid pretty shirt was scratching against his face, Riki was very upset

He lets out a big dramatic groan, grabbing one of his hoodies from the floor next to his bed and shoving it onto you so that he can sleep in peace

You’re still wearing it when he wakes up, and earlier he was too tired to be embarassed but now he realizes what he did and gets a little red

“Thanks for the hoodie ki,” you tease him, but still refuse to give it back when he asks

“Well if you hate it that much you can take it off.”

“Never!! This is mine now!”

Cue him chasing you around to try and get it back

[trans-axolotl]

also in regards to that last article about varied ways of thinking about psychosis/altered states that don't just align with medical model or carceral psychiatry---I always love sharing about Bethel House and their practices of peer support for schizophrenia that are founded on something called tojisha kenkyu, but I don't see it mentioned as often as things like HVN and Soteria House.

ID: [A colorful digital drawing of a group of people having a meeting inside a house while it snows outside.]

"What really set the stage for tōjisha-kenkyū were two social movements started by those with disabilities. In the 1950s, a new disability movement was burgeoning in Japan, but it wasn’t until the 1970s that those with physical disabilities, such as cerebral palsy, began to advocate for themselves more actively as tōjisha. For those in this movement, their disability is visible. They know where their discomfort comes from, why they are discriminated against, and in what ways they need society to change. Their movement had a clear sense of purpose: make society accommodate the needs of people with disabilities. Around the same time, during the 1970s, a second movement was started by those with mental health issues, such as addiction (particularly alcohol misuse) and schizophrenia. Their disabilities are not always visible. People in this second movement may not have always known they had a disability and, even after they identify their problems, they may remain uncertain about the nature of their disability. Unlike those with physical and visible disabilities, this second group of tōjisha were not always sure how to advocate for themselves as members of society. They didn’t know what they wanted and needed from society. This knowing required new kinds of self-knowledge.

As the story goes, tōjisha-kenkyū emerged in the Japanese fishing town of Urakawa in southern Hokkaido in the early 2000s. It began in the 1980s when locals who had been diagnosed with psychiatric disorders created a peer-support group in a run-down church, which was renamed ‘Bethel House’. The establishment of Bethel House (or just Bethel) was also aided by the maverick psychiatrist Toshiaki Kawamura and an innovative social worker named Ikuyoshi Mukaiyachi. From the start, Bethel embodied the experimental spirit that followed the ‘antipsychiatry’ movement in Japan, which proposed ideas for how psychiatry might be done differently, without relying only on diagnostic manuals and experts. But finding new methods was incredibly difficult and, in the early days of Bethel, both staff and members often struggled with a recurring problem: how is it possible to get beyond traditional psychiatric treatments when someone is still being tormented by their disabling symptoms? Tōjisha-kenkyū was born directly out of a desperate search for answers.

In the early 2000s, one of Bethel’s members with schizophrenia was struggling to understand who he was and why he acted the way he did. This struggle had become urgent after he had set his own home on fire in a fit of anger. In the aftermath, he was overwhelmed and desperate. At his wits’ end about how to help, Mukaiyachi asked him if perhaps he wanted to kenkyū (to ‘study’ or ‘research’) himself so he could understand his problems and find a better way to cope with his illness. Apparently, the term ‘kenkyū’ had an immediate appeal, and others at Bethel began to adopt it, too – especially those with serious mental health problems who were constantly urged to think about (and apologise) for who they were and how they behaved. Instead of being passive ‘patients’ who felt they needed to keep their heads down and be ashamed for acting differently, they could now become active ‘researchers’ of their own ailments. Tōjisha-kenkyū allowed these people to deny labels such as ‘victim’, ‘patient’ or ‘minority’, and to reclaim their agency.

Tōjisha-kenkyū is based on a simple idea. Humans have long shared their troubles so that others can empathise and offer wisdom about how to solve problems. Yet the experience of mental illness is often accompanied by an absence of collective sharing and problem-solving. Mental health issues are treated like shameful secrets that must be hidden, remain unspoken, and dealt with in private. This creates confused and lonely people, who can only be ‘saved’ by the top-down knowledge of expert psychiatrists. Tōjisha-kenkyū simply encourages people to ‘study’ their own problems, and to investigate patterns and solutions in the writing and testimonies of fellow tōjisha.

Self-reflection is at the heart of this practice. Tōjisha-kenkyū incorporates various forms of reflection developed in clinical methods, such as social skills training and cognitive behavioural therapy, but the reflections of a tōjisha don’t begin and end at the individual. Instead, self-reflection is always shared, becoming a form of knowledge that can be communally reflected upon and improved. At Bethel House, members found it liberating that they could define themselves as ‘producers’ of a new form of knowledge, just like the doctors and scientists who diagnosed and studied them in hospital wards. The experiential knowledge of Bethel members now forms the basis of an open and shared public domain of collective knowledge about mental health, one distributed through books, newspaper articles, documentaries and social media.

Tōjisha-kenkyū quickly caught on, making Bethel House a site of pilgrimage for those seeking alternatives to traditional psychiatry. Eventually, a café was opened, public lectures and events were held, and even merchandise (including T-shirts depicting members’ hallucinations) was sold to help support the project. Bethel won further fame when their ‘Hallucination and Delusion Grand Prix’ was aired on national television in Japan. At these events, people in Urakawa are invited to listen and laugh alongside Bethel members who share stories of their hallucinations and delusions. Afterwards, the audience votes to decide who should win first prize for the most hilarious or moving account. One previous winner told a story about a failed journey into the mountains to ride a UFO and ‘save the world’ (it failed because other Bethel members convinced him he needed a licence to ride a UFO, which he didn’t have). Another winner told a story about living in a public restroom at a train station for four days to respect the orders of an auditory hallucination. Tōjisha-kenkyū received further interest, in and outside Japan, when the American anthropologist Karen Nakamura wrote A Disability of the Soul: An Ethnography of Schizophrenia and Mental Illness in Contemporary Japan (2013), a detailed and moving account of life at Bethel House. "

-Japan's Radical Alternative to Psychiatric Diagnosis by Satsuki Ayaya and Junko Kitanaka

[dwaekkicidal]

Lessons

˚ʚfwb!Bang Chan x fem!Readerɞ˚

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ summary: Just a regular session of your best friend helping you learn Korean <3

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ word count: 1.6k

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ warnings: fem!reader, nicknames; ‘honey and good girl,’ pvssy slaps, playful ass&thigh spanking, Chris calls himself Daddy once lol, rough sex, creampie (try to pee after sex pls <3)

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ notes: max and I spoke about this a few weeks ago and it was soo hot so I wanted to write something for it,,, but then I lost motivation for it for a while😭 anyways hope u enjoy <3

OH and thank you for 700 followers!! (im late so now so ~25 away from 800) :''') I have something planned for if/when I hit 1k hehe, Love u guys :>

DO NOT republish or translate+post my work!

After you had moved to Korea, you made it your sole goal to be completely fluent in Korean as soon as possible. You knew the basics and some vocabulary that got you through day-to-day encounters, but holding an actual conversation past introductions was rather difficult. So, this is how you found yourself in your current situation. Your best friend and fuck buddy of 2 years giving you weekly Korean lessons.

And this? This was a normal thing between you both. Sitting in his lap practicing while he sits there explaining things and kneading your thighs mindlessly. It was a normal occurrence! The only difference is you usually wore sweats or some sort of bottom that would cover your legs more. Today was one of the hotter days of the week, so you disregarded the extras and opted to only wear one of his shirts, nothing else.

His hands rubbed eagerly up and down your thighs, squeezing the flesh like he does with soft pillows. Again, it was normal, but today he seemed to be restless with his movements. You couldn’t help but let out a shaky breath when he mindlessly squeezed the flesh of your inner thigh rather roughly while he translated a word you couldn’t figure out. “What is up with you today? You’re more touchy-feely than usual.”

“Sorry haha. Had a long day so I’m fidgety.. And you know I can’t resist you in nothing but my shirt.” You only hummed in response. You believed what he said, but you also knew that he wasn’t stupid and that the apology was not for his roughness as much as it was for how riled up he knew you were getting. He was never actually sorry about being physically affectionate with you, but you both knew how you tended to get very horny when his hands were on you so desperately.

“Mmmm.. Let me play with you a little while you read, okay?” You shake your head and push your study items away, pulling a laugh from him when you mumbled out ‘Fuck that, I need you.’

“None of that hahaha. Focus on the reading, honey.” He said, placing a kiss on your cheek before leaning down and biting into your neck. You groaned and leaned back into him, grinding against him in an attempt to make him fold in your favor. He let the first few grinds pass as he left hickeys along your neck, but the second your hands cupped him through his shorts he grabbed your hips to still your movements.

“Hey.“ The commanding tone in his voice caught you off guard and had your hands immediately stop in their tracks. “Stop that. You’re going to finish reading this text and then I’ll fuck you nice and good.”

“It’s not that serious, Chris. It's just a few paragraphs, we can do it after or just skip out this week.. Plus it’s your fault I’m this horny anyways.” The attitude in your voice makes him narrow his eyes, and then he grabs your chin and angles you to look back at him.

“Watch your tone. And I’m not gonna tell you again,” His hand grabbed both of yours and placed them on the table before moving to spread your legs open for him. Then, he finishes his sentence and enunciates each word with a harsh smack to your bare cunt. “Finish. Reading. The. Article.” The last one comes off harder than the others and it pulls a squeal from you, making your hands shoot down and wrap around his wrist while your legs slam shut against his hand. He grabs from your inner knee and hooks your legs over his, keeping you spread for him, and he pulls your book closer again.

You can feel the teasing smile on his face after he places a kiss on your cheek and then speaks against it. “You only have one article left, honey. The quicker you read it, the quicker I can bend you over and fuck you into the table~” You can’t help but whine and nod. Once you look down at the material again, Chris’ hands that were previously rubbing your inner thigh move back to rub along your wet folds. 

Then for what feels like the next hour, but was really just 20 long minutes, you slur out the words in front of you as best as you can. Chris’ left hand swapped between drawing circles into your clit and pinching your nipple, while his right hand shoved fingers against your walls. And every couple of minutes he would swap between kissing your neck to sucking hickeys into your collarbone. However, you weren’t allowed to cum and any time you mispronounced something or took too long to read a word, a stern slap was sent against your clit. As long as you continued to read well, he would pump 3 of his fingers in and out of you.

By the time you’re halfway through the material, your mind is foggy and you’re almost drooling on yourself from the constant edging. By the time you’re on the last sentence, your legs are shaking and you're slumped against him letting out quiet moans. Your neck and collarbone were so red from his incessant suckling, and you were desperate to get this over with. And then, when you finally finished, he stopped all movements to place a soft, congratulatory slap on your thigh and massaged your hips.

“Good girl… Now was that so hard?” With that, he hurriedly clears the desk before helping you stand and then standing himself. The chair you both rested on was kicked backwards and your whole world spun as he suddenly pinned you to the desk. You whined as his hand held a tight grip in your hair and pushed your face into the table. His free hand playfully squeezed and slapped at your ass a few times before you heard his shorts and boxers hit the floor.

You sighed out his name as he teased his tip through your folds, silently pleading with him to hurry it up. “Shhhhhh… ‘Atta girl. You did so well, baby. Now let me take care of you, yeah?”

He finally sunk in and nothing but low, whiny moans left your lips as you clenched around him. His free hand grabbed a handful of your ass, squeezing it in appreciation while he slowly sunk every inch he had to offer. Once he bottomed out he gave you only a little bit of time before his thrusts started, albeit slowly at first but quickly ramping up due to his own impatience. It doesn’t take long for him to change to an unforgiving and rougher pace, his hand still holding your head against the table.

“Fff-fuck.. Christopherrr-”

“Yeah yeah, baby. Daddy’s got you. ‘M nice and deep, just how you like it right?” You missed the way he smirked when you let out a desperate ‘Uh-huh’ in response, but you could feel the way it encouraged him when his hips slammed against yours with more eagerness. He keeps this pace up for a while until he feels you tighten around him, and then he changes to slow, deep thrusts that make your eyes roll into your skull. 

The hand in your hair slides on top of yours on the desk, intertwining your fingers, and he leans forward to place his forehead between your shoulder blades, “Mmmm keep squeezing me, Honey. Fffuck, juuust like that..”

When you’re tipping over the edge, he places a kiss on your sweaty skin and moans against it. “That’s it, baby. Cum for me and I’ll fill you up just how you like it, okay?” You want to nod, but everything hits you at once so you can only cry out against your desk.

As your orgasm starts to fade into overstimulation, he fixes his posture and focuses on his hip movements. A squeaky moan falls from your lips as he suddenly bottoms out and the hold on your hip tightens. He threw his head back and bit his bottom lip as he came, attempting to muffle his whiney moans. He rides out his orgasm by sometimes pulling out and snapping his hips harshly against yours.

“Fuck… If that’s how we end the studying session from now on, I might consider this payment.” He jokes.

You let out a breathy laugh and he starts to pull out slowly, pushing you into the table as he did so. You take the moment to catch your breath when you realize he’s gone quiet and there’s the light feeling of breath on your thighs. Your head snaps back and you realize he was kneeling in order to watch his cum slide down your folds.

“Hey!” you whine and place a hand on his forehead, pushing his face away only for him to resist, so you use your feet to push him harder. He laughs at your embarrassment and stands up, pulling you to sit up as well and lifting the shirt off of you. He uses it to wipe you down before throwing it into your hamper and grabbing one of his spare shirts from your dresser. He steals a kiss before covering you in the shirt, then drags you to the living room to watch a tv show together.

You two spend the rest of the night on the couch, watching tv and relaxing in each other’s warmth. It’s no surprise when soft snores are heard and you look down to see his sleeping face squished into your chest. You huff out a laugh before you snuggle him closer. Then, your eyes get heavy until they inevitably close, and you fall asleep too.

Taglist:

@jiminssluttyminx @changisworld @juskz @linohumina

[uberthief]

Ok so this was just a funny idea that popped into my head because I drink so much caffeine. But I suddenly found myself NEEDING to know how many shots of espresso could I theoretically take before I kneel over and die of an overdose.

I'm pretty sure I could get at least 30 shots in before my head starts to hurt too much and then I collapse, so tune in next time when I buy a bunch of shots and test my hypothesis out!

[ID: A screenshot of an article, the text reads "I know you're desperate to know how many shots of espresso can kill you. Depending on many factors, a lethal dose of caffeine is between 5,000 and 10,000 milligrams. That's roughly between 75 and 155 shots of espresso." End ID]