#also help idk how to put it in the ao3 collection

[jack-of-starss]

Watch the City Burn

Hello everyone! I finally posted a fic! Well, a chapter, at least.

I wasn't going to do SpideyTorch week at all this year, but as I was falling asleep last night I remembered this idea I had back in April, so I figured today was as good a time as any to write the first chapter.

I do have big plans for the story, so if you enjoy it then leave a comment to let me know and give me some motivation to finish it <3

@spideytorchweek

[darlingpoppet]

Fave Fics of 2023!

A list of some of my favorite fics I read in 2023, though note not all of them are from this year. I feel like I didn’t get to do as much reading as I would’ve liked but I guess at least I was still able to put together a decent list! This isn’t a ranking, I listed everything in alphabetical order.

a bit of earth by @elemmacil (patrochilles)

Character study of Hadesgame Achilles & his time in the house of hades, pre-canon. Also, Zagreus takes care of a plant & it’s so wholesome. Lovely, atmospheric, and fueled by vibes, I adore the secret garden inspiration which slots into the hadesgame-verse sooo perfectly. This is great for the sad girlies like me who recently re-watched the movie from the 90s and thought “what if the whole movie was just us watching lord craven being a sad, pining dilf the whole time?” *clicks tongue* noice.

A Reasonable Explanation by stygius (pza)

I already read On The Ropes by red_smear last year so it doesn’t get to be on this list but I did go into 2023 continuing to seek out some of the “old classics” for this ship (yanno how reading fics that were published before joining the fandom sometimes feels like consuming media that existed before you were born? lol) this one is fun for the subversion on the “relaying messages” trope and taking god worshipping to literal (sexyy) extremes… I think if you wanted a good pza introductory fic this would be a good place to start!

Debased by youcouldbeagod (patrochilles)

Found this on a whim one day while clicking through the tags, as it is pretty much the only dedicated Troilus & Cressida Patrochilles fic on AO3 and it is ＢＲＩＬＬＩＡＮＴ！ The story is simply that Thersites stumbles upon Achilles & Patroclus having sex in their tent and he provides his usual witty and scathing commentary throughout. It truly reads like Shakespeare in prose form, I could easily imagine it being staged, it’s like a deleted scene from the play! The ending is also pitch perfect and still lives in my head rent-free. If you’re familiar with Shakespeare’s version of the characters definitely give it a read.

isn’t it romantic by infinitesle (dillydallybutterfly) (pza)

I was going to recommend a patrochilles fic by infinitesle that I love which is you are the currents that are pulling me onward but I’m pretty sure I read it in 2022 so it doesn’t count, sadge. So instead I’ll recommend another lovely morsel, a pza fic set in the jazz age au that a bunch of us in the pza channel of the hades lounge discord collectively came up with. Idk this might be a “you had to be there” kind of story but I think it still paints a pretty picture and if it inspires anyone else to contribute to the AU I wouldn’t complain. I’ll make my own proper contribution eventually, mark my words!

not the desperate type by @baejax-the-great (patrochilles, side hector/patroclus)

Baejax is well-known for their long fics which are all bangers ofc but personally my favorite piece of theirs this year was actually this oneshot in which Patroclus is engaged to Hector and then cheats on him with his ex, Achilles. They get caught in the act and the results are… predictable, lol. I love that it hews close to the tone of the Iliad where it’s no good/bad guys, just flawed humans making flawed choices and the AITA version of this story would totally be given an Everyone Sucks Here verdict, I’m sure. I’m STILL thinking about the ending even months & months later. Oh and of course, the sex is chef’s kiss!

One Night Of Chaos by Luddleston (pza)

This was technically a Dec 2022 read but I’m making an exception for it because I feel like it’s the flavor of pza I had been craving all along when I was reading through some of the older classics for this ship and it was key in helping fuel the inspiration for my own pza fics this year. There’s just something about Zag being invited into Patrochilles’ little world to watch their charming rapport with one another & being disgustingly in love that’s PEAK CONTENT for me and I loved this spin where he gets to meet them while they’re still alive, pre-heartbreak. Basically everything about it is my personal ur-pza text so if you’ve liked any of my own pza I’m sure you would like this one too. The sequel is also fun and was properly a 2023 read for me so I’ll mention it too haha.

Presentation by @sonderlivra (eruri)

Judging by the time stamp of my comment, I started my 2023 off right by reading this fic by one of my all-time favorite eruri authors! This is an omegaverse fic with a twist, it is well-written, hilarious, and had me guessing up until the very end. I would literally recommend anything this author writes (including the asscreed fics she & other beloved friend @zorthania have been writing this year… I don’t go here but these are my blorbo in-laws and I care them uwu)

sacramentum by fresco_k (eruri)

I didn’t take the time to read many other eruri fics this year unfortunately but I did get to beta some fics for this year’s eruri matchmaking event and this was one of them: a gladiator AU set in Ancient Rome and it was so serendipitous that I got to help with something so close to my current hyperfixation! The premise is very intriguing and it’s off to a lovely start… not to mention the author is a sweetie who knows & has a lot of passion for the time period… so check it out!

the slow mending by meikuree (pikuhan)

I finally got to dip my toes into some pikuhan fics this year and luckily my first one was a real banger! This was such a lovely little canon-compliant Hanji character study along with an exploration of their relationship with Pieck representing the two sides coming together and it was so beautifully written. It feels like the perfect introductory fic for the ship just in general because it really highlights everything that’s attractive about it! Love it!

tight fit by naxtique (zagchilles)

naxtique’s fics pretty much all scratch that itch for hadesgame dead dove of the dub/non-con variety, oftentimes laced with angst. Their particular flavor of Zagchilles with slave-to-his-passion, guilt-stricken Achilles is so compelling it always makes me stare at the wall thinking about it. And this is my favorite one, in which Achilles gets sex-pollen’d and ends up in a compromising position with Zagreus. Another one where the ending haunts my dreams (in a good way). Not for everyone obviously but if this sort of thing is up your alley, it’s great.

you’re a walking disaster, and yet— by @johaerys-writes (patrochilles)

Another patrochilles GOAT well-known for their serial longfics, and this year I’ve been enjoying their modern AU Patrochilles where the two of them grow up together in rural Greece. This one has probably my favorite ever synthesis of takes on Achilles’ character I’ve read so far—brilliant, autistic, and gender fluid. It’s definitely an extreme slow burn and gets pretty angsty & messy at times but it’s also devastatingly realistic & relatable and speaks to me a whole lot :> currently ongoing, definitely worth diving into!

[delusinaldreamer19]

Vent/Rant incoming. Feel free to disregard.

(But also maybe don’t, idk)

Something that’s become apparent to me as I’ve posted more frequently on Ao3 is just how disheartening it can be to feel like I’m performing for a silent crowd.

Dgmw, it is very much that I am just a sensitive & insecure person by nature. (I’m incredibly embarrassed abt posting this, but again, just venting.) And its not that I’m trying to directly beg for ppl to read and comment on my works, but I am sort of…indirectly doing that.

I just can’t help but feel a bit like ‘what am I doing wrong?’ I’ve both intentionally and unintentionally written a decently wide verity of fanfics for Kuro, whether it’s shorter oneshots or longer multi chapter fics, as well as tonally with things being funny, sad, mysterious, contemplative. I try and pay attention to what gets the most interaction so that I know what people are most interested in reading. But even with doing that, I can’t really tell. Like I want to write stuff that people enjoy reading, but it sometimes feels impossible to tell if I’m doing that.

(Pls excuse me, I’m about to start very much complaining)

I don’t even know why I tend to feel that way, I’ve got six stories posted and half have over 1000 hits (two that are over 2000 hits). But again, I’m a horrifically insecure person with an adhd brain that never shuts up.

I know that I’m doing nothing but preaching to the choir when I say ‘authors really want you to comment on their works!!’ And it’s not that I don’t ever get comments (and I swear that I am extremely thankful for each one despite how what I’m about to say sounds), but I just feel like the nature of them is what gets to me sometimes.

I put a lot of time and effort into my stories (despite how quickly I’ve been updating), and I work really hard to write things that are well thought out, interesting, and while I don’t write smut (as of now), mature. I’ll look in other stories comment sections to see what other ppl have said about works that I’ve enjoyed, and I’ll see questions and commentary about specific things that happened in the chapter, and my works just…don’t tend to get a lot of that.

It could very well just be that my neurodivergent brain is upset about not getting that instant gratification, I get that. But I just wanna like- talk to people about my stories. I wanna have discussions about things in Kuro or things that I’ve written. I wanna hear when something I’ve created has garnered any sort of reaction. And because I don’t get a lot of that, my cursed neurodivergent and insecure brain translates it as meaning that I didn’t truly make anything that warranted a reaction.

I’m just incredibly prone to growing obsessive over things like this. I didn’t really ease into writing fanfiction over time, I sort of just hit the ground running and took off. For reference, I quite literally wrote all of my stories (a collective 146,000 words (I added it up cus I was curious)) in JUST this past year.

I’m kinda not sure what I should do. If I need to “work harder” and “do better”, or if I just need to wait for this influx of self doubt to pass. Or even take a small break from writing, which I don’t necessarily want to do since it’s still something that I greatly enjoy. But if that’s advice worth giving in regards to my predicament, then I suppose it warrants being considered.

(inhale) BUT ANYWAYS, that’s the end of my little vent session. As I said in the beginning, feel free to disregard, or don’t. I could probably use some advice tbh, but don’t want to beg for it. I haven’t had much of an active presence in fandom spaces (or really just active internet presence) for most of my life, so dealing with this sort of thing is still very new to me and I’m not really sure how to navigate it😭.

[yellowocaballero]

I'd be interested in those writing shortcuts 👀 (don't feel pressured though)

Yeah sure! This is in reference to this and this posts.

These are all pretty 'fic style' stories, because they scaffold off pre-existing canon. It's like you're walking inside of a pre-built house and you're putting up new wallpaper and designing the rooms. Novel style is like if you're building the entire house. So these are really great for fun and if you have writer's block or have problems starting a story. They're also really good if you're practicing your dialogue, scene composition, characterization, etc - they are not good for developing skills on how to build the house, but if you're trying to work on actually making a readable story they're great methods to practice. They're also a lot easier to make good lol.

While writing these out I realized that they're almost entirely AUs. This is because I like AUs. You don't have to do AUs, you can adapt these however you want if you just like writing canon. Loser. Anyway, these are my low-effort stories:

A series of disconnected scenes that take place over a long period of time. If you have an idea in mind (or you just want to use the OG work's timeline), then you can show scenes or moments over a long period in time. For example, ages ago I wrote an AU story following the life of one character. One scene for 2008, one for 2010, one for 2012 etc.

Rewriting canon. If you have an AU idea or have a way in mind to change canon to something you think fucks harder, then you can use pre-existing episodes or season plotlines and just add your own flavor to what already exists. If you write for BNHA you aren't allowed to do this. That's the rule. How is all BNHA fic 600k AUs where one extremely minor detail is changed. God they're boring.

Alternate viewpoint/missing scene of a story you have. Like you can do this for canon too but that sounds super boring. This is actually something I do in order to help the quality of the main story - if I'm finding myself writing a super complicated character, I write another story about him from his POV to help give me a handle on him. Or write her parts of the story from her perspective. It's a writing exercise to help me figure out the character and it is also easy and fun.

"X Meets Y". Do you really like Legally Blonde? Do you think your favorite character being Elle Woods would be really funny? Stuff like that. Would it be really funny if your blorbo was Sharpay Evans? Yes it would be. Yeah I DID write a story many years ago that was "X meets Teen Beach Movie", why?

I don't know how many other people out there have extremely convoluted entire AU ideas, but if you have the whole AU in your mind then it is incredibly easy to write little stories or snippets from the AU. Like, so easy. A stand-out scene in your mind, the life of one supporting character, an alternate POV, whatever. Literally whenever I want to write something absolutely 0 effort whatsoever I go back to one of my 3 bugfuck stupid AUs and write something for them again.

This is actually something I think everybody should do, because it is basically how I learned story structure: find the trashiest, most formulaic genre you can. Watch or read something from that genre, or just collect genre conventions. Use the pre-packaged and pre-written formula to structure your own story and fill in the blanks.

(Also, these aren't very tropey or reliant on shipping/romance beats, which is nice if you want to get away from that stuff)

Nowadays, I find all of that helpful when I feel like doing something 0 effort. When I was a less experienced writer and I deadass did not know how to build a house, then these were really helpful for learning what wallpaper looks good and what arrangement of furniture creates good fung shui and what couches go best with that coffee table. They're also good passing. Seriously, these are like the most popular stories on my AO3. People eat this shit up. Why. They're so lazy.

IDK, these are what I do because they're the kinds of stories I like to write! What you find easy to write will be different. This is all a very personal list. I can see my personal thumbprint (no romance, AU central) really clearly. I'm kind of curious now: what are y'all's favorite low-effort, easy, fun stories to write?

Also as a heads up if your story doesn't have any sort of conflict in it, then it will actually very difficult to write. Trust me. Conflict makes you voom. Do it. Please. Love of god.

[sunderedazem]

Hey! It's been a while :D I've been off the Internet for a bit but just know both of your updates have been giving me essential bits of life energy, even though I haven't had time to type something out in appreciation until now. First things first I absolutely love what you wrote for the 'stay?' prompt, it's exactly what I hoped and imagined what could have happened if things hadn't gone so wrong back then. Seriously, it's like you took a look into my brain, I was really imagining scenarios of helios coming back and taking care of an exhausted emet selch 😩 such good food thanks so much for that.

Okay so back to the actual ao3 updates, I couldn't believe that you guys did the tempering cure so early XD ahhhhhh it was so good! The way it was just a slight shift of perception, how emet selch goes off just barely holding it together, the line "I always believed I would see them again" broke me so bad like how dare you 😭 but honestly finally processing his grief now is great cause it'll be so much better when Hyth comes back 😈 iirc that that's happening. One of my favourite bits was emet selch having company while the cure was being administered, idk there's always something about having support while you're healing. Corrain's writing is superb as always, in the tempering fic as well as the Sharlayan one, he comforted emet selch so well and it was very interesting to see his point of view when he snapped at thancred, poor guy needs a long break and so much therapy. I haven't read the most recent lelesu writings yet but ahhhhhh she has such big sister energy? Such a solid anchor, it's so great every time she gives support.

I think that's all my thoughts for now, so that this doesn't get too long. Thanks so much for the new content, and I hope the both of you are doing well!! Many well wishes <3

Okay! Now it's time to sob over this ask so excuse me while i

And YEAH we couldn't wait to untemper that bastard man and break him even worse. Like imagine waking up and the thing you've been working towards for the last thirteen thousand years is not only principally opposed to what you believe is right, but also now you have to accept that everyone you'd ever loved is dead and gone and will not come back.

(And then they do. Because we are stealing Hyth. And then also stealing Elidibus from Pandaemonium like sorry Athena that man is ours now. And then Hyth is spotting Lahabrea's soul mixed in with Nidhogg and they are Stealing (and helping him put himself back together, and confiscating his wife's evil space rock) him too. And we are stealing the Sundered Ascians as we find them and curing and collecting them, because they all deserve a chance to recover from the literal apocalypse knowing that the star is actually safe. Anyway. I have emotions about the first Final Days and how nobody who lived then deserved what the world and Hydaelyn ended up giving them, no matter if it was necessary or not.)

To be fair it most likely only feels fast because most of what happens in Shadowbringers and the post 5.0 patches happens as it does in canon and tby rewriting all the Same Stuff seems kinda jejune so we skipped it XD. There are a few more pieces from SHB in process though, we just have to finish them.

And YEAH GOD. Corrain can be very cruel on occasion, and him snapping at Thancred for having EXTREMELY JUSTIFIABLE RESERVATIONS (even if he was a jackass about it) wasn't his finest moment. He doesn't even honestly feel so upset about Minfilia, he liked her alright as a person, and she WAS kind to him, but in the moment he's purely reacting in anger, and it dredges up some really nasty parts of him. This is a trait Helios had as well, if uh. You read the Final Days breakup fic XD.

And YEAH I ALSO NEED MORE LELESU ALWAYS. She is so SASSY sometimes. Hey @azems-familiar give us your girl. Grabby hands.

Honestly I know I'm late actually answering but this made my week last week 🥺🥺🥺💙💙💙

[fitzrove]

Choose violence Tanz der Vampire (or another fandom if you dont have an answer!) 3, 17, 22!

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

OOH i collected a bunch of these for my video essay xD

This is perhaps way too mean ahdhfh and I think differences in opinion are productive in fandom spaces, but... one old post I screenshotted argued that people who criticise romantic kr*lock x sarah may not in fact be doing it out of seriously analysing canon, and are instead "smashing 'frivolous fangirls' dreams' - because god forbid we ruin the Serious Vampire Musical with something as fluffy as EPIC GOTHIC ROMANCE". XD And then the post pointed out that vampires are a metaphor for escaping societal pressures, especially for young women and lgbtq+ people, so it's actually a deep and good theme in and of itself.

Idk it's sooo ironic how that post posits that specific relationship as women's liberation (and also points out lgbtq people's struggles in society, as a sidenote...) when there are in fact women out there who don't think romance with men liberates them - and in fact, for whom anything of the sort would be a prison and a nightmare (... that society still tries to push on them at every turn). Like I get how some people would like it but your experiences are not universal and it's ironic that they didn't think about what the L in LGBTQ+ means when making the post and even mentioning it ahdhfh

Anyway yeah, I criticise the (over)romanticisation of Krolock and the de-romanticisation and farcification of Alfred because I hate fun and women's rights, hope that helps (hsdhfjfgfkjgk)

17. there should be more of this type of fic/art

Canon-compliant/canon-universe (ie. not AU) Alfred x Sarah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Canon-era, post-canon, vampirified, not vampirified... straight people rights (ahsdhjfjskdfghjld). Oh but I do think I would accept an AU that would make it lesbian alfred x sarah because girl Alfred is so exciting to me (but it would have to be good, I hate when people genderbend and change everything in an illogical way lmao). Both fic and art for this >:]

22. your favorite part of canon that everyone else ignores

alfred x sarah (XDDD). Máté Kamarás nightmare solo 1 deep lore (jsjajfj mostly a joke). The depths of the Alfred corruption arc thing and the differences in his and Sarah's worldviews/anxieties (as represented metaphorically by how they approach vampirism). I mean there are people who don't ignore these things but there is too much h*rbert x alfred content in proportion (HAHSDHFJFJ sorry, everyone should write what they want, it's just that that time could've been more productively spent writing todolf fanfiction /hj) and it's craaazyyy how marginal alfred x sarah is in fandom and in fan content (14 fics on ao3 if excluding h*rbfred and krolock alfred sarah polyamory) vs. how much people (at least in the past, now it's mostly ignored or talked of positively I think) fight/fought against it and put it down as a ship.

[hypn0sssss]

@clueless-shapeshifter I am so sorry Tumblr hates me and does NOT want me to save asks to my drafts for some reason and always posts them before I'm ready idk why!

--------

Words: 1,107

Fandom: Ensemble Stars!

Pairing: Mayoi Ayase/Tatsumi Kazehaya

@badthingshappenbingo Prompt: Take Me Instead

TW: Mayoi-typical self deprecation/self dehumanizing behavior

OKAY before you get started it is very debatable whether this actually fits the prompt or not! I am so sorry, I genuinely could NOT think of ideas without having to come up with an establish some kind of au! If this does not fit the prompt, I could try again if wanted! I am sincerely sorry!

You can also read this on AO3!

“I think we did rather well today.” Tatsumi speaks up, zipping his bag shut.

-----

Mayoi can still feel his heart beating rapidly. The show ended about 5 minutes ago, but he can still feel the energy of the crowd as they pack up and leave. Along with the other members of Alkaloid, he was getting changed and collecting his stuff.

“I think so too!” Hiiro cheers. Mayoi and Aira nod in agreement.

“Do you guys still want to go to that restaurant afterwards?” Aira asks, wiping off his makeup.

“Of course.” Tatsumi replies.

“We wouldn't want to waste our reservation, fufu~” Mayoi smiles. He doesn't deserve to be in a group with such pure people, but it does feel nice to have calm moments like these.

After he finishes packing up, he looks over at Aira, who seems to be frantically searching his bag.

“Aira-san, what's wrong?” Mayoi asks, leaning over to see the inside of his junior's bag.

After a few more moments of searching, Aira speaks up. “I can't find the makeup palette that Narukami-senpai let me borrow! I promise I'd give it back to her after the show! I remember putting it back in here after I used it!”

Hiiro walked over to Aira. “Do you need help finding it, Aira?”

The blond looks up at Hiiro. “Yes please.”

“How about this,” Tatsumi starts. “Me and Mayoi-san will make our way to the restaurant, so that we don't lose those reservations, and Hiiro-san can help Aira-san find the makeup palette. Then, you two can meet us there.”

Hiiro smiles up at Tatsumi. “That works, Tatsumi-senpai! We'll see you there!”

After a moment, the two older Alkaloid members head out of the backstage area, walking towards the new restaurant that opened recently.

“Fufu~ You did very well tonight, Tatsumi-san.” Mayoi breaks the silence. Tatsumi smiles at Mayoi, grabbing his hand.

“Thank you, Mayoi-san. You did as well.”

Mayoi’s smile was slightly shaky, but overall grateful. A bug like him doesn't deserve to be praised by such a holy person like Tatsumi. But… Tatsumi seems so genuine, that Mayoi can't find it in himself to deny it.

The two continue to walk silently, still hand in hand. All that could be heard were the sounds of the early evening. It calms down any adrenaline Mayoi may have still had from the show.

It was when they were about one block away from the restaurant that they heard an excited squeal. Then, a group of 2 girls approaches them.

“Oh my God!! Mayoi Ayase and Tatsumi Kazehaya!!” The first one cheers. “We're such big fans!! We saw the show today, it was amazing!!”

The second one, without any warning, slings her arm over Mayoi's shoulders. Mayoi flinches slightly, but the person doesn't budge. “I’m such a big fan, Mayoi-san! You've been my favorite since Alkaloid debuted!”

He squirms slightly under the fan’s arm, but she doesn't notice. Tatsumi does, and tries to pull Mayoi away from her. It doesn't succeed, and Mayoi notices the first fan look down at the two idols’ conjoined hands.

“Nao, look! I told you they had something going on!”

Now with hands that are starting to shake, Mayoi pulls his hand away from Tatsumi’s. Tatsumi opens his mouth to speak, but the second fan, Nao, beats him to it.

“Oh my god!! I told you, Minako!!” She leans closer to Mayoi, her arm still wrapped around his shoulders. The first girl, Minako, also approaches Mayoi.

“So long has it been?”

“Have you guys kissed?”

“Do you ever plan to tell the public?”

“I've been shipping you two since the beginning!”

Mayoi can feel his hands start to shake even more. The girls are too close, they're asking too many questions, they're so loud. All Mayoi wants to do is to yell at them, tell them to stop.

But that would be rude, would it not? What if the girls told people about it? Wouldn't that bring negative attention to Alkaloid?

So he just stands these, frozen under Nao's arm and the girls’ questions. His breathing shudders slightly as he continues to shake.

“Excuse me, you two.” Tatsumi speaks up. Mayoi can feel the fan’s arm be taken off his shoulder. “Mayoi-san is obviously uncomfortable. Please back up.”

Despite him staring at his feet, Mayoi can hear the fans back up.

“If you have any questions, you can take them up with me instead.”

“Really?” Minako asks, looking over at Tatsumi.

“Yes, I can.” He answers. He looks over at Mayoi, mouthing something at him.

‘Start going to the restaurant. I'll meet you there.’

Mayoi nods, scurrying off. The rest of the walk to the restaurant goes by in a blur, and he soon finds himself in front of the restaurant. He sits on one of the benches outside of the restaurant. He can't find it in himself to go in.

As always, he was totally useless. He couldn't say a single word to those fans. He had to make Tatsumi step in. He shouldn't have had to do that, but Mayoi was just so worthless, so helpless, that he couldn't do a thing.

After a moment (it could have been just a couple minutes, or half an hour, Mayoi couldn't tell), he hears footsteps approaching him. He looks up to see Tatsumi looking at him, brows furrowed in concern.

“...Mayoi-san. Are you okay?”

Mayoi doesn't know how to answer. He's already scum for making Tatsumi worry about him this much, he can't make it worse.

Tatsumi sits down on the bench next to Mayoi, placing his hands on top of Mayoi's.

“I didn't tell them anything, if that helps. I asked them to reconsider their behavior and refused to answer any of their questions about us.”

“...Thank you Tatsumi-san.”

The two sit in silence for a moment before Mayoi takes his hands away from Tatsumi’s, covering his face.

“I'm sorry! I was so useless! I'm sorry you have to be with someone so pathetic that you had to stand up for me! I can't do anythiiing!”

“Mayoi-san.” Tatsumi pulls Mayoi into a hug, rubbing his back. “You were overwhelmed, and those fans overstepped boundaries. You don't need to apologize.”

Mayoi doesn't deserve this comfort. He knows that. But the affection feels so nice. He leans into the touch.

“Would you like to go to the dorms? Those girls already made us late to the reservation, so I could call Aira and tell them to go straight home with Hiiro.”

“...Are you sure?”

Tatsumi lets go of the hug and stands up. He gently helps Mayoi stand up.

“I am. Let's go home.”

[highvern]

don't transfer to ao3!! people are taking fics off there and putting them behind paywalls on etsy!!!

yeah i know fics are being bound and sold via etsy but that's something they can even do with my fics here. however, its a different issue than AI scraping and learning from my posts.

im not leaving tumblr, ive been here rotting for over 10 years. but they make it very tempting to move my work somewhere that at least makes some effort to protect creativity and originality.

to my knowledge, since AO3 is a community funded and modded website, they don't sell date to AI companies. they have code in place to prevent large scale data scraping to the best of their abilities. unlike this shit hole that's actively working against the interests of creatives.

not ranting at you anon, but in general:

AI sucks and if you can't see the problem with rampant AI data collection then you also suck. and you especially suck if you use AI to write stories. if you can't be bothered to put in the time to write something yourself, why would someone put in the time to read it?

as for people stealing and binding fic since you brought it up:

(i only can speak on IP law for things like movies/books/tv shows bc that's what is creating this entire shit storm.)

if someone buys a fic behind a paywall when a copy exists for free, they need more help than even the lord can give them.

unless authors choose to take them down, then the fic sits for free 99 on ao3. and if they choose to do that then more power to them ESPECIALLY when shit for brains are breaking the law and selling their work and ruining fic for everyone. hello lawsuit! hello prison!

idk why people cannot enjoy what exists for free out of love and creativity when it runs the risk of fucking over everyone. gatekeep fanfic since people don't know how to just print a PDF and put it in a binder anymore.

[marsbar17]

DVA and Bridgette tonight queen 🤭🫶

IVE BEEN OBSESSED WITH THIS SHIP LATELY OMG

Anyone else obsessed with mekamechanic you should read this fanfiction by The_Big_Oof on AO3

Anyways on to the headcannons :)

CONTAINS: NSFW further below

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

《SFW》

• This ship just works so well because they're both awkward nerds in their own ways like dhdhjsja

• D.Va is obviously the most loser gamer out there (i say this affectionately :3) who's social skills are probably terrible because most of her life is portrayed on social media

• Brigitte is very family-centered and her godfather is literally in Overwatch with her, that must make relationships awkward pffff, also she's just a big buff lady who's very kind-hearted and shy

• They probably got together due to other peoples' influence, Tracer definitely takes most of the credit for getting them together

• Brigitte loves HARD, she's head over heels for D.Va, every action she takes has D.Va in mind, she watches all her streams from start to finish, she puts D.Va's feelings and happiness above her own

• D.Va is centered a bit more around herself due to all the pressure of fans and Busan's expectations of her, she has a harder time remembering that Brigitte has needs and wants aswell, but she gets the hang of it over time

• Their love languages are definitely gift giving and quality time

• Brigitte will buy anything that reminds her of D.Va, bunny plushies, keychains from her favorite games, snacks and drinks that she likes, literally anything

• D.Va just likes being around Brigitte, gaming together in eachothers rooms, fixing up Tokki after a tough mission, working on one of Brigitte's projects, sitting beside eachother at meals, they're always together

• They go on little arcade dates and fast foods dates where they set up picnics in really pretty spots and just eat junk food pffff

• They're also the type of couple to just go on walks through town, where all the shop owners know them by name and ask Brigitte to fix their shit

• D.Va likes being able to carry Brigitte while she's in her mech, she likes being tall and strong :)

• Literally everyone in Overwatch knows they're dating, how can you not when they're like a highschool couple cuddling in the hallways

• Brigitte definitely calls D.Va bunny, kanin (bunny in swedish), and darling

• D.Va calls Brigitte baby and jagiya, idk she doesn't seem like the type of partner to use a lot of pet names

《NSFW》

• They're both switches but Brigitte probably tops more often

• D.Va is the more dominant one though, we support power bottoms on this blog

• Honestly they're too sweet for any kinky shit, D.Va is definitely into toys tho

• She's got a small collection, nothing too insane or huge just a bunch of dildos and vibrators because why not

• There favorite positions are missionary and riding, I use those a lot but like yes

• Kisses during, a lot of kisses and body worship

• Brigitte makes sure that D.Va knows she's fucking beautiful, and D.Va makes sure Brigitte knows that she's pleasing her so good

• I can't think of any more hrhdjks they're too sweet man

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thank you for reading my mindless rambling shdhjaka

If you like my work liking and reblogging takes like 30 seconds and really helps me as a creator. Requesting ships or other things also really helps me and I like it a lot, so please do!

Have a good day :)

[spiteless-xo]

Im so sorry this ramble is so long but here u go🙁

The absolute terror that came over me when i saw the email notification for the new chapter😭😭😭ok before i read im gonna put my final insights here,, ive literally been scrambling around my house procrastinating reading it bc im TERRIFIED and honestly im so sad its ending,, ive been reading since like february??? I think???Idk atp but i cannot express how much ive loved this story i wish it couldve just continued forever🥲🥲

Ok my predictions are that this will not be a one way path ik tiff is evil and likes to fuck w our feelings😞 i think smt twisted like reader picking eren but eren not picking reader could happen BC HE REALISED HIS SELF WORTH MAYBE😭😭but im not intricate enough to actually use that to decide but i honestly am at a loss i have no clue,, its an honest gamble but i do think eren is endgame??? Help i have no clue😭 but i do remember someone analysing the smells? Vanilla is more home and comfort so like a foundation? And citrus was for summer and things but i was thinking how summer is a temporary thing where people live out crazy activities for the sake of it but the whole thing abt it is that its temporary like we always have to go back HOME to our foundation aka vanilla aka eren????

Thing is ive been eren for endgame since DAYY ONEE i only almost switched up once during the arc with erens confession (idky😞) but other than that ive stayed loyal LMAO idk if im just being delusional tho convincing myself I think she'll end up with eren but

ALSO my other point right

I wanna take this back to tiff bc she IS the author😋 from what ive seen in her tumblr,, a lot of the reader owns resemblance to tiff?? She's mentioned a lot how the readers job is based off her irl experience in an office and some of the readers habits shes claimed to have herself i remember she was saying how people bashing the reader made her think like 'wait thats kind of me tho’ i remember it too vaguely to quote but ANYWAY off the basis that the reader is in some aspects (not all) a projection in some ways?? Its gonna influence,, we ALL know tiff is a strong jean girl😭 we love that and so u'd think jean would be picked BUT in between chapters i saw a few tumblr posts abt her growing liking for eren? I wont deny that she is DEFINITELY still a jean girl but i think for some form of variation in her work bc i think as far as i know she only has one other eren story on her ao3 and so i think her growing crush ok eren may be enough to win her over for just this fic even if jean remains her favourite?? I have like ten million other theories but i need to read the chapter now i will be back😋😋 (im so scared im shitting my pants)

-

Im back!! its been like 6 days since i read it but i just didnt have time to write out my reaction after bc i was so fucking immersed i lost track of time and was late to meet up w my friends💀💀💀anyway it was such rollercoaster omd😭 the letters from jean we’re honestly so cute and i think the year time skip made everything all the more realistic in her choice bc she frl needed that break😭 OMD AND THE WAY I WAS PANICKING when that girl came out the elevator istg i thought it was mikasa,, with all generic eren fanfics if theres ever a third party to make the reader jealous theres some unspoken rule to never use mikasa for some reason and i was dying thinking it was gonna be her😭😭 commonly people use historia so when even a mention of eren having a new gf came up my mind shot to historia i swear i was worrying just as much as the reader💀 anyway back to jeans letters i was honestly like getting a bit swayed that i wouldnt even be upset if reader ended up w jean and especially considering how offstandish eren was when reader went to see him at first he was like not following up on anything like he was rushing to see his stupid gf (it was armin🎉🎉🥳) AND THE READER WAS SO CUTE FOR THAT GUNDAM (tysm tiff its such a silly headcanon that eren collects those and builds them i can see it HELP) and i think it was so cute seeing the reader and sasha as bsfs more bc i think there was long periods of time that that relationship w sasha wasnt as strongly shown so its so nice AND OMGOGMOGM LEVI????? U made the dynamic w them so well how he has that small bit of warmth telling her she can work there whenever she needs its the cutest thing ever i love it more than ever and the way levi talks abt petra UGH u made everything so endearing, and istg the reader has never been real until this chapter bc she is so right saying that a bunch of paper doesnt change him bc I KNEW AS SOON AS HE SAID HE NEVER LEFT TITAN AND BECAME BASICALLY HIS DAD that he was not gonna be endgame,, i always had the theory that titan and the kirstein status is a metaphor for the status jean has from the reader bc shes loved him for so long thinking hes someone that hes really not,, jean was painfully aware how he could make any mistake at work and have no punishment similarly to how even if he hurts the reader she will always forgive him so if he couldnt avoid reaping the benefits of his kirstein status then it means he’d continue to take advantage of the reader but thing is this status dissolved when she took that year away from him which is why I appreciate how realistic it all is logic wise,, Eren evidently changed and omg i wanna know abt the pictures on his wall bc when reader was first there there was mention how there were no family pictures or any sign of him really living there but when she came back there were pictures,, i was trying to figure out the meaning but i cant get my finger on it😭 my guess is that he found more purpose in life?? Idk bc that seems so vague and farfetched i was wondering what ur intentions were with that🙆‍♀️ and i had a theory AGES AGO that piecks ‘bad bf’ before jean or smt was zeke?? Bc knowing how zeke was in that gc and stuff like that it sounded like smt was gonna link together? I just think the added details abt piecks past was left unfinished so i was also wondering abt that😋 anyway ugh the ending was also so cute usually i hate when characters dance in fanfics but it was so cute and fitting for the moment like THEM AT THE POINT omg i loved it i love u thank you SO MUCH tiff for an amazing story i hope u have a good day bb❤️❤️❤️

omg thank you for a such a lovely message 🥰💗🥰💗 i’ll hide my response under a cut here because it’s long

reading since february!! omg that’s like the beginning! i think i dropped the first chapter on valentine’s day

“tiff is evil and likes to fuck with our feelings” 💀💀💀 yes.

ugh the smells!!!!! that was my biggest slip up frfr 🙈 i said way too much when i responded to that ask because i was so excited someone asked!! and you guys were all right of course. eren was home and jean was just temporary (like the summer season)

lmao ok literally. i was still a hardcore jean girlie when i started writing tbaw and even after i decided it was gonna end w eren. so throughout writing tbaw….. i literally fell in love w eren jaeger 🙈 and i almost fell out of love w jean!!! tbaw!jean is so awful he almost ruined jean completely for me

hehehe yes yes you’re 100% right w jean. he’s so used to taking advantage and never getting punished (w reader and titan) that he doesn’t really see a point in changing because tbh his life is pretty good?? but then when reader spent time away from him, her blind infatuation w him wore off and then when he tried to pull that same shit again, she’s like nah bro.

ok this is probably not clear at all, but the deal w eren’s apartment is that in the beginning it’s very sanitized and show-homey because he feels distant and detached from his friends/family after the death of his mom and becoming close w zeke. he’s like internally ashamed of the way he’s acting because he knows he’s in the wrong so he’s almost punishing himself by distancing himself from everyone.

and then after a year when he’s changed and the pictures are on the wall, its because hes worked his way out of that hole of self loathing and is happy with the person he is now. so he’s able to feel more comfortable, even in the privacy of his own home, and having his mom “watch over him” in a sense, and cherishing his previous relationship w jean and his ongoing friendship w armin, etc etc.

yes!! pieck’s bad bf was zeke! i was originally going to have her have a bigger role in tbaw to show like how eren’s past behaviour can affect people, since she was a victim of that treatment when she dated zeke. but i scrapped it because it would’ve extended the story so much and also i didn’t really like writing pieck lol

so there are like lil bits and pieces about the pieck/zeke relationship and how the way he treated her makes her seek validation in men, but it’s super underdeveloped in tbaw.

thank you again for such a lovely comment!! i’m glad you enjoyed it 🥰💗

[ghoste-catte]

hi! I'm not sure if this is an odd question but do you ever experience anxiety when it comes to sharing your fics and if so, how do you deal with that? I used to enjoy writing but somehow I got stuck in a loop where I avoid sharing my works out of fear that others will judge what I create but this also keeps me from improving at all. I know content creators are generally told to not worry about making mistakes and that it's also part or the process but I find this is easier said than done.. (this makes me respect any kind of artist so much more tbh. like, I think the worst kind of pressure is the one you put onto yourself and idk how others deal with that?) anyways, thanks for reading, I'm a big fan of yours 🙏🥰

Not an odd question at all!

When I first started writing fic as an adult, I had horrible anxiety about it. I had written maybe 10 "fics" as a teenager, but they were all really short or something stupid I had written with friends. So when I dipped my toes back into fanfic in my 20s, I had to sit in complete isolation in my bedroom, with the door closed, with headphones in. Even though my wife knew I was writing fic, I absolutely could not have her in the room with me. When I first started, I was so mortified that I'd just write G and L if I was handwriting in a notebook, just in case someone inexplicably saw it.

For me, what helped me get over that escalating anxiety and actually post the damn thing was twofold:

I joined an event, where I had assigned prompts and an assigned posting date, so I felt a sense of external pressure and obligation to post.

I had been rolling Hanakotoba around in my head for literal years, and I really did want people to read it.

I do understand the feeling of vulnerability with taking the text and putting it out there for others. There's often, for me at least (still to this day!), a feeling of apprehension about people being able to know things about me based on my work. I overcome this generally by writing for events, prompts, and other people. It both ups the pressure to actually produce and post something and feels a bit less vulnerable: no, see, I wrote this for something; this isn't just my personal id on display.

So if your issue is the mortifying idea of being known, we're lucky to live in a time where you have a few options:

You can post your fic to the Anonymous collection on Ao3, so that no one ties it to you specifically.

You can pick a username that doesn't link to any of your other usernames and not link your socials to the fic, leaving it fully pseudonymous.

You can turn off comments, screen comments, or disallow comments from guest users on Ao3.

You can post the fic and orphan it (though this removes any control you have over the fic like being able to edit or delete it).

You can post the fic with minimal tags (just 'Creator Chose Not to Warn' and a fandom), to reduce the likelihood of it being seen.

Add a disclaimer (even one of those silly tags like 'No beta; we die like Neji') or something in the author's note to let potential readers know how you're feeling. Something like: "Hey, this is my first time posting a fic, so I'm really nervous! Encouragement is very welcome." (The one thing I wouldn't suggest doing is putting something like, "I know this sucks!" - that does genuinely turn people off from reading.)

If your concern is the publication of judgment, I don't think you have much to worry about there. Fandom has largely moved away from a concrit culture (where public posting was automatically assumed to be an invitation for people to critique your work, sometimes harshly). I rarely see people leave critical comments on fic. That's not to say I've never seen them, but they're easy enough to delete and just not respond to.

On the other hand, if you're just worried about internet randos thinking things about you in their head but not saying anything ... I hate to not have very good advice about this, but it really is just something you have to let go. Just like you can't control what anyone thinks of you in real life, you can't control how they think of you or your work online. Your work isn't gonna be for everyone, and that's okay! What matters is that you like it or want to share it.

One last thing: There's no shame in writing for yourself and not publishing. You don't need to publish to improve. If improvement is your goal, check out writing advice blogs, pick apart the stories you like to find the things that make them work for you, and read voraciously. It's practice that leads to improvement, not publication.

Sorry for the essay. I hope this is helpful!!

[socially-awkward-skeleton]

WIP List

Thanks @funkypoacher for helping to expose my growing list of WIPs and random ideas I have for fics (The ultimate callout post lmao)

As I'm sure most folks are aware I've got two major long form fics I am currently working on as the mood strikes:

1) Only You - FC5 Soulmate AU (Kit x Jacob)

Currently working on Chapter 10. This one is on a bit of a hiatus, the plot outlines for each chapter are more or less figured out its just having the words and ideas to craft anything that makes sense and that is remotely worth reading.

All I know for sure is that Kit will have an issue with one of the hunters who will very quickly be put on both her and Jacob’s shit list, and that Burke will be joining the story sooner than later. The Reaping is right around the corner now and Staci’s about to get a first hand look at what Kit’s been up to since being taken hostage (sorry Pratt)

2) The Animal in Me - FC5 Werewolf AU (Kit x Staci, Kit x Jacob)

Chapter 2 is being reworked because I am a slut for making Staci a more popular character and I will put in the work to make more people fall in love with him. Chapter 3 is already written and includes a reworked version of the scene I posted for writer’s month that really kicked this whole fic off in the first place. Plot outlines for each chapter are more or less decided on and I know how I want the fic to end so at least there’s that.

There will be silver bullets, much blood spilled and definitely a “Who did this to you?” moment thrown in for good measure.

Honestly though, this is such a self indulgent fic and I don't even care anymore. Kit's getting a werewolf throuple and there is nothing anyone can do about it.Kit’s getting it all, baby (Mostly i just can’t let go of her and Staci because they make such an odd pair and I want them to be happy and somewhat normal while also letting her be feral with Jake under the full moon)

The Kinktober fics:

1) Breaking Pratt 2: Electric Boogaloo

Was going to post this one today but decided to wait and rejig it a tad. It's missing that je ne sais quoi that the thigh riding fic had.

2) Housebroken

The collar fic. The actual smutty part is all stage action and needs the details added still but the brain isn't exactly in a smut writing mood.

Then there are the fics that have stalled or are just a random collection of ideas that need a lot more time to stew before they are even worth writing:

1) The Hunter Becomes the Hunted

This one has been sitting on the back burner for a while. I’ve posted two chapters of it to AO3 but not much more work has been done on it since. It's Kit's background fic as a soldier so it means I have to be in the mood to do some research on the war in Afghanistan and I just haven't had the energy to do that as of late.

2) New Dawn AU

I have ideas, aesthetics, and a pinterest board and not much else. tbh, I haven't even finished playing the game but I know I gotta write the Canon divergent fic where Jacob is alive and well with Kit living that barbarian life in New Eden.

3) a million and one ideas for bunker fics. IDK what I specifically want to do with them yet. I need to write the one where her and Jake adopt the two kiddos in the bunker (whose parents Kit just happened to kill in the Trials...oops) and then the birth of Haven and her growing up. The plan is to get Kit a bit of her soul back and have her be less of the murderous monster that she is so she can become a good mama bear to her kiddos. The ideas are there, but the energy to write it is not.

4) and contemplating writing Kit's main timeline story out in full. I was going to go the short fic route (which is what all of her fics are so far) and just make them a series, but now I want to fill in the gaps especially after writing out the fic with her and Joey for the angst prompt. There's lots of stuff about Kit before she falls prey to the Seeds that I'd like to tell, stuff that might make her a little more sympathetic before she crashes and burns into becoming the monster I know and love.

5) and on top of all that are the random drabbles I've spewed forth about Homelander and Nightingale that really have no story or logic to them yet and aren’t yet ready to see the light of day

[inkystaarart]

the lineups of my daydreamer au aka my highschool au i drew while watching yhs

these are just the sketches of the first few profiles i had written in my notes. i did a few sketches like 2 months ago basically introducing the sibling pairs but i’ll explain the characters drawn here better.

keep in mind these are all pretty much headcannons. i built this kind of like TommyInnit Changed the Chat to GENDER SMP

(this is a very long post)

Grian Xequla Dreamslayer

he/they/star/chirp pronouns

bisexual (i might change this later?)

student council. basically boatem and a few others are on the student council with mumbo as president (at first)

avian/watcher. he has an improved eyesight and he can occasionally see through walls.

flock: mumbo, scar, pearl, etho, timmy, martyn, big b, and joel (joel is not official yet)

orchetra kid. he plays the viola.

Pearl Moon Dreamslayer

she/void/star

queer

student council

dating gem.

avian/watcher. can see through walls some days. or see people’s skulls. it’s funny. sometime she just says “you have a nice skull” to someone without context and scars them for life. (basically context for that one obscure pearl post i made a few months ago)

genderfae!

flock: grian, gem, impulse, jimmy, martyn, big b

Jimmy Solidarity Dreamslayer

he/it/feather

bisexual

he’s an avian/watcher. although he got mostly avian genes. sometimes he has improved eyesight but usually he doesn’t. depends on the day. he’s the least watcher out of all of them.

flock, pearl, grian, joel (not official), scott, martyn, big b

on the school’s swim team. based on empires s1 since he was a cod boy? idk i didn’t watch that season from his pov

he looks up to grian. i actually can’t mention a lot of what i put in this paragraph on my notes app because it reveals a shit ton about grian’s backstory and i’d rather hurt you on ao3 in a few months. if you do read.

Mumbo K. Jumbo

he/it/gear/zero

unlabeled

student council president! he was sick when everyone voted for president so he was president

etho’s twin.

likes to study end crystals!

Etho Slab Jumbo

they/echo/daze

aceflux

mumbo’s twin

really good friends with grian because i love their dynamic. mumbo sometimes gets jealous

dated joel in middle school

orchestra kid. he plays the cello

in the sparring club at school. practically the best sparring person there.

Scar Goodtimes Smajor

he/it/meow/fizz

omnisexual

student council. he’s in charge of designing school merch

fey

scott and scar are irish twins. they’re in different school years for story purposes.

favorite sport is archery. if you know you know

orchestra kid. plays the violin.

Scott Chromia Smajor

he/color/lucid/ve

gay

does not have a favorite color. loves them all equally.

collects crystals

Bdubs Smajor

he/moss/thorn

questioning. or unlabeled queer.

clings to etho and cleo a lot. calls them dad and mom.

Fail Whip “Fwhip” Tay

he/it/gold

demisexual

he’s adopted into gem’s family. and also random headcannon: gem and fwhip have two moms. they’re cool like that.

Gemini “Gem” Tay

she/they/daisy/thorn

bisexual

dating pearl

band kid. plays the trombone.

False Symmetry Shadow

she/they/it/wing

pansexual, polyamorous

dating cleo and stress

in the sparring club at school. wins a lot. except against etho.

shapeshifter. she can change what hybrid or species she appears as, just not her physical humanoid details (if that makes sense) she usually appears as an avian but without the wings.

Lizzie Shadow

she/xe/meow

bisexual

dating joel

shapeshifter. she switches between a fish lady (for when she swims) and a cat hybrid. someday i’ll better explain how the shadow family’s shape shifting powers work

joel acts tough and like he can protect her but lizzie defends him in fights and everyone is scared of lizzie but not joel because joel is short

dyed her hair pink. joel helped her and then lizzie convinced him to do a green streak in his hair

on the school swim team

orchestra kid. plays either the bass or the viola. depends.

Tango Tek Shadow

he/ve/sun

polysexual

most of my notes on him are for his future relationship

shapeshifter. takes the form of a demon/netherborn

Impulse SV Daemonium

he/they/demon

gay

skizz’ twin

skizz calls him piss demon because his horns, the tips of his ears, and his tail are colored yellow

Skizz MC Daemonium

he/him

straight

i legit wrote “single. not ready to mingle. never will be” in his notes.

this concludes part one.

[eggtwobroes]

frenrye

i dont evem know who these guys ARE!

jokes aside though i luv frenrey. frenrey means alot to me which sounds kind of funny to say. its an inside joke to several friend groups (3 friendgroups i can think of off the top of my head). its a comfort. it makes me unironically nauseous if i think about it in bad contexts. i couldnt look at it for a little bit due to bad associations. it also helped me figure out alot about myself (mostlu helped me figure out that im. fictoromantic </3)

alot of text under the cut sorry. WATCH OUT! (ship ask game)

as for what it means to me personally, at first i was annoying with hlvrai. i had the worst possible characterizations yiu could possibly conjure up because i wanted to frankenstein every fucking ao3 trait for benrey and gordon together because i thought that was the way to characterize them. i was also 13 so whatever. i also projected onto benrey HARD which made him more annoying and me more annoying also. at some point i projected too hard and got nauseous with the ship cuz i convinced myself that i was projecting trauma about my ex friends onto them.??? which was weird but i ended up reaching some closure regarding those ex friends a little while ago and also at the time i realised "hm. no this is stupid" and moved on. then i got on tumblr and became a bigger frenrey fan (really funny to say) and it started meaning more to me... my characterizations got better ovr time (same with my art) and everything was goung well. i had friends who liked frnerey and also i liked frenrey myself. peace and love on planet autism. and then the thing in june happened when my now ex friend told me something about literally everyone in The Frenrey Discord server which caused alot of stuff that i wont explain cuz i think you guys know it by now. that was embarrassing. i also couldnt look at frenrey because i associated it with that and it made me sick to my stomach to think about. at some point i got normaler and less mentally ill and stuff. frenrey also became a relaly big inside joke in my friend groups and stuff <3 i dont really make as much frenrey art as i used to now since im more of a darnrey enthusiast at this point but thats cuz i did figure out im fictoro bcuz of it (shoutout to my wife. girdon)

other than what it personally means 2 me its also a really funny dynamic. guy shows up and starts pestering you the WHOLE FUCKING DURATION of the worst days of ur life. claims he used to know you when you were kids (you fucking didnt). and ur brains response to this is "lets kiss with tongue" its so funny. in canon context its like. this guy plays a game and meets the most fucking insufferable npc of his life and falls in love with him when hes literally not even tangible. how do you store that much emotion towards a character from a game you could just turn off dude. theyre both pathetic i think. their dynamic is kinda hard to describe. i think its funny when benreys head over heels for this guy that hates his guts. i think its funny if they both hate eachothers guts and are simultaneously thinking "i hope this guy fucking goes to hell. i bet he wants to kiss me. good thing i dont want that". i think its funny if benrey doesnt care about gordon at all and just harasses him cuz he thinks its funny and gordons like "god this guy sucks. would it be weird if i kissed him. id hate that probably". idk its a very fun ship to play around with its very flexible.. they fit as queerplatonic, romantic, AND platonic. they work out in game and nongame scenarios. they work in aus because theyre opposites. its so fun. im like dr frankenstein and frenrey is my frankensteins monster that i test on just to see what happens and what works best. idk how else to end this paragraph and continue to the next one sorry

mre related to the first bit about how theyre an inside joke. heres a collection of frenrey related images that are inside jokes or about inside jokes

theres also a lot more videos i have but i cant put themall here. sadly. heres one at least

[oceangenasi]

I posted 5,529 times in 2022

17 posts created (0%)

5,512 posts reblogged (100%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@shana-rosee

@givelizardsswords

@vethbrenatto

@aeonthedimensionalgirl

@vaspider

I tagged 5,033 of my posts in 2022

Only 9% of my posts had no tags

#bbc merlin - 613 posts

#q - 476 posts

#locked tomb - 344 posts

#crit role - 309 posts

#kenobi series - 278 posts

#ofmd - 249 posts

#kenobi spoilers - 207 posts

#cats - 150 posts

#wwdits - 144 posts

#campaign inspo - 138 posts

Longest Tag: 132 characters

#i’m 2% mad that the first lyric is missing a word but that’s bc i’m a cranky bastard who obsesses over lyrics to an unhealthy degree

My Top Posts in 2022 below the cut lol

#5

I started thinking about this on Twitter and had to elaborate: People are interpreting the "you didn't kill Anakin Skywalker" line as Anakin seeing Obi-Wan sad and summoning a shred of his former self to absolve Obi-Wan of guilt. But while that was its EFFECT, I don’t think that was Anakin’s INTENTION. I think he was still trying to hurt Obi-Wan.

Anakin can’t STAND the pity and regret -- it makes him furious. It reminds him of how far he’s fallen and what he’s become. In claiming responsibility for his own corruption, he's trying to hammer home that he isn't a traumatized young adult who was trapped by the trauma of a global war and manipulated by one of the only people who showed they cared about him -- even if he absolutely is that person. But he's TRYING to be his evilest version of himself, to say that he's a monster and he made himself that way and he WANTS to be one.

He’s lashing out in an attempt to reject Obi-Wan's compassion -- that last bit of his past, his "feelings" for his former master -- and, by accident, stumbling into exactly what Obi-Wan needed to hear.

22 notes - Posted June 23, 2022

#4

you'll wish she didn't!

For science, I collected what each of the Houses hears when Gideon speaks to them for the first time.

Seventh: "Yo. Step off." (when Cytherea faints)

Sixth: "Then get off your ass and help me."

Fifth: never got to hear her talk :(

Fourth: thee line of all time, which is to say, "Did you know that if you put the first three letters of your last name with the first three letters of your first name, you get 'Sex Pal'?"

Eighth: "They had names, you lily-livered, tooth-coloured asshole, and if you want to make a thing about it, I warn you that I'm in the kind of mood that can only be alleviated by walloping you."

Corona: "No. I thought their arms would all flop around." (in response to Corona asking if she's seen a necro hold a sword before)

Ianthe/Babs, probably also the Second: "Why?" (after they gather to confront Cyth about Pro's head)

24 notes - Posted October 17, 2022

#3

is anyone else here talking about the foil/parallel of a vampire who's supposedly being manipulated by his familiar and the familiar just believes he's taking care of his master bc idk that also gave me Nandermo Foreshadowing Vibes

26 notes - Posted July 20, 2022

#2

the fact that the Nandermo tag on ao3 is already listing several new E-rated fics and they are very literally canon-compliant.... I cannot even

39 notes - Posted July 20, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

The symbolism of Obi being weak and out of practice but being saved through the kindness of others while Vader is strong but alone in every way that matters

85 notes - Posted June 1, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[leviathans-watching]

Hi!!! I love your writing so much and your most recent one is so pure 😫 So I have an idea/request that I’ve been hesitant to submit (bc I’m so shy and insecure and overthink lol) but here it goes: what if the demon bros, before they fell to the devildom, they were in the celestial realm and they used to date angel!MC (if dating was allowed in the celestial realm? Idk) and after the fall, they hadn’t seen them until the exchange program, where Angel!MC was one of the exchange students and they’re reunited?

Or this same thing but when they’re reunited, MC falls for another one of the brothers?

I can’t decide if I want angst or fluff 🙃 idk. You can choose this. But please, if you don’t want to or are uncomfortable writing something like this, you don’t have to do it. Either ways, I think your writing is amazing!! 💓

(Could I be 🍀 anon?? Just so you can recognize me in the future?)

@the-goddamn-mermaid asked: Well, I've been reading your headcanons and fanfics for a while and I saw your requests are open, so I thought, ya know... Can't help falling in love by Elvis Presley, right? Maybe you could write about MC being an angel and Lucifer (my fave <3) in the verge of tears bc he can't help falling in love with her (or them. I'm a woman, but do as you please). Pretty please?? 💕

haunted & holy

includes: lucifer x gn!reader (no pronouns mentioned)

rated t | wc: 2k | m.list | crossposted on ao3

a/n: okay so this idea intrigued me so so much and i loved writing but i have a feeling some of it will be a little clunky as lucifer's pov gives me trouble sometimes haha. also it was difficult weaving belphie's situation in there but i tried lol. regardless, i hope you enjoy!! thank you for requesting! my inbox is open to chat/leave feedback but reqs are temporarily closed!! haunted & holy is from half alive's creature btw! (and yes, you can be 🍀 anon!!)

also please reblog this here & give it some love on ao3!!

“We’ll always be together, right?” you asked, clasping his hand softly.

“Of course,” Lucifer replied with ease, flipping your hand over so he could hold it for real. “Nothing in this world could ever take me from you.”

Oh, how those words played in his head when he fell, your tear-stained face the last thing he had seen. Your hand, reaching futilely for him, even as you were pulled back by several other angels.

*

He still thought of you, though it had been years since anyone dared mention your name. Diavolo and Barbatos, unaware of your existence, and his brothers, who now knew better.

But he didn’t forget you. Couldn’t forget you. You haunted his dreams, your airy laugh echoing in his mind when he awoke, inescapable. Every line of your face was still sharp in his mind, not dulled, like many of the other memories from the Angel Realm.

Once, he had thought time closed all wounds, but now, he knew better.

When Diavolo had put him in charge of picking out exchange students, he couldn’t stop himself from paging through all of the applications from the Angel Realm, looking for your name. It wasn’t there, and Lucifer wasn’t exactly surprised. You never had been big on politics, and who knew if you still missed him the way he did you. It had been hundreds of years.

Despite the very logical and understandable reasons, he couldn’t help but be upset. Did you not remember him? Did your promise of never leaving his side truly mean nothing now that he was no longer graced?

Lucifer felt a headache building behind his eyes and looked at the stack of applications from the Human Realm he still had to go through. The job was a chore, and he wished to be done with it.

Perhaps he had been more hopeful than he was willing to admit.

A gust of wind scattered the papers on his desk and he reached over to grab one, not even bothering to look at the name as he slid it into the stack of other chosen applicants. Whatever. It was a human anyway, not like they were going to last long here no matter who they were.

Sighing, Lucifer set about collecting the rest of the papers and throwing them in the wastebasket. Diavolo would have to live with his choices, and really, the sooner he finished with this he could turn his attention back to internal affairs, more important ones.

Surveying his office one last time to make sure everything was picked up, Lucifer stood. He would take the chosen applications to Diavolo to look over and then wash his hands of it all until Diavolo needed him again.

*

Lucifer stood next to Diavolo, on his right, as always. Today was the day they’d be welcoming the exchange students in and he had to be in top form, especially since he’d be welcoming Simeon, who, while wasn’t you, was someone he also missed from the Angel Realm, loathe as he was to admit it.

Besides, he thought to himself, perhaps I can ask him for news of you. Not right away, of course, but still…

Performing his duties as Simeon and Luke were welcomed to R.A.D. was painful. The small glimpse of the familiar palace he used to reside in through the portal was enough to send his mind wandering, even is by all appearances he seemed perfectly focused. Diavolo, of course, seemed to see something was off, but Lucifer ignored the probing look he was sent, smiling pleasantly, impersonally, at the angels.

It took no time at all for the angels to be shuttled off to their new residence, though Simeon managed to nod to Lucifer as he was led out, something Lucifer acknowledged with the slightest nod of his own.

“Are you alright?” Diavolo asked when they were alone once more, asides from Barbatos, of course.

“Ah, yes,” Lucifer said calmly, smoothing his tie down. “I apologize.”

Diavolo’s face softened slightly, and Lucifer couldn’t stop the frown that pulled at the corners of his mouth in response. Despite having been born and raised in the underworld, he was still too full of love, too caring of others. While that made him a good person and leader, it didn’t always make him a great demon.

“Is this about Belphegor?” Diavolo pressed, and Lucifer’s spine straightened.

“Of course not,” he said smoothly, watching as Barbatos’ eyebrows climbed up towards his hairline. Maybe he should have lied; it would have stopped the questions. “Shouldn’t we be getting on with it? We don’t have all day.”

Diavolo gave him one more, deep, searching look, but dropped it. It didn’t take long for everyone to be settled back into their places, him included. Shaking off the thoughts and memories of you and of his time as an angel, Lucifer drew his sin around him like armor, forcing his shoulders down.

Solomon seemed to see right through him, his mischievous gaze giving Lucifer a slimy feeling. Thankfully, the sorcerer was able to make himself comfortable quickly, as it was likely this wasn't his first time in the Devildom.

Only one more, Lucifer told himself. Then you can leave.

“I’m going to begin summoning the last exchange student,” Barbatos intoned, beginning the magic. A swirling portal, the same as all of the others, opened up, and you fell through, not quite managing a graceful landing like everyone else.

Lucifer felt frozen, as he looked down at you. It couldn't be! No, seriously. When he had fallen, you were a favored angel. This human in front of him couldn’t be one and the same.

But, as you looked up at him, eyes gleaming, he knew.

Diavolo went through his little speech and Lucifer only barely managed to deliver his lines. His mind was whirling, and he couldn't look away from you. How were you here? Why were you here?

You stared at him right back, steady. Lucifer could barely contain himself. He wanted to sweep you up in his arms, shake you by the shoulders, get to the bottom of things.

It seemed like an eternity, but eventually, he was tasked with taking you back to the House of Lamentation. He waited for you to gather your things, which you did with haste, your fumbling so far removed from the graceful movements from before that he was thrown into another loop of doubt.

Neither of you spoke until you were out of the R.A.D. building and walking down the street.

“Is it really you?” Lucifer asked, staring straight ahead. “Not some- magic, or trickery?”

“It is,” you said, and your voice, so familiar, made his heart beat faster. “I’ve missed you, Lucifer. So much.”

“Prove it to me,” he challenged, his cocky tone only barely covering up the plea in his voice. “If it’s really you, what promise did we make to one another in the grove by the palace?”

You looked up at him, a little half-smile on your face. “We promised to always be together. And I’ve come here to fulfill that promise.”

Lucifer swallowed, elation singing in his bones. “I’ve missed you too. How are you here? How are you human?”

You sighed, looking up at the dark sky. “I was… displeased with the situation around your fall and the Celestial War. I kicked up enough of a fuss that I was stripped of my grace and sent to live with the humans.” There’s obviously more to the story that you’re not saying, but he won’t pry. For now.

“I was trying to get down here, and I think Micheal knew that,” you continued, “which is why he put me in the human realm. Enough of my grace remained that I did not age nor could I die, so I stayed. In limbo, waiting. When I learned about the exchange program I knew I had finally found my way back to you.”

“You’re foolish,” Lucifer said, but there was no heat. “To get yourself stripped of your holiness for me. I was not- am not worth that.”

Your face twists into a scowl. “It wasn’t just about you,” you explained. “Heaven was just no longer the place for me. There were many things I did not agree with that only got worse when you and your brothers were gone.”

“I see,” Lucifer said. He had had no idea.

“But that’s all in the past,” you insisted. “I’m here now, and you’re here now, and we can begin anew. I mean,” you say, shy for the first time since you had appeared, “if that’d be something you were interested in, of course.”

“How could it not be?” Lucifer asked wryly. “A day hasn’t gone by that I haven’t thought of you. MC, you were the love of my life and I hope that you still are. Though this is all a bit unorthodox-”

“-When have we ever been?” you finished for him, grabbing his hand like you had so long ago. And, just like before, Lucifer held it properly, weaving his fingers between his. He felt off-kilter and unsure, but for the first time in a long while, looked forward to the future.

You were humming under your breath, obviously in good spirits even though there was so much still unknown. Lucifer was never one for being fanciful, nor did he ever think that the ‘reunion’ trope was a particularly poignant one, but maybe he was wrong.

“A lot has changed since we last saw one another,” Lucifer said suddenly, the words bursting out of him. As much as he loved you, so much was different. He had another brother, for crying out loud! “I’m not the same man you fell in love with.”

“And I’m not the same person either,” you replied after a moment. “I don’t expect you to be the same, or for us to be the same, but like I said before I’d be interested in pursuing a relationship despite that. I have faith that I’ll love you, no matter which version of yourself you are, and I’d never fault you for growing and changing, especially with all that has happened.” You laughed. “You probably think I’m being naive, and so what if I am? It’s only the first day I’ve been here. We have a whole year before we truly need to worry.”

There you go again, calming him down when he gets ahead of himself.

“I suppose you’re correct,” Lucifer says, seeing the wrought iron gates to the manor. “As always. Ah, prepare yourself for my brothers. We have a lot to explain.”

“I’m excited to see them all again,” you said lightly. “And to meet the new one. Satan, was it?”

Lucifer jolts, remembering Belphegor. “About that,” he said, “first we may have to take a trip to the attic.”

“Whatever for?” you ask, but already seem prepared to follow him, no questions asked. Diavolo may be mad, and Lucifer would be in a lot of trouble from a bunch of people, but situations change and he thought he was doing the correct thing, so…

“It’s kind of hard to explain.” Sheepishly, he rubbed the back of his neck. “But when you yell at me I promise I’ll deserve it.”

“Okay,” you declared, dubious. “You’re not exactly filling me with confidence here.”

That made him chuckle a little. You were so different, but still you. And oh, how he had craved your presence.

“I really missed you,” he stated again instead of the hundreds of other things he wanted to say. He thought you knew what he meant regardless. The ‘l-word’. The one he had been too hesitant to say, even back when you were both angels. Surely, it was too soon to say it now, even though he felt it in his heart, whatever of it remained.

“And we’ve established I’ve missed you,” you said, a note of humor in your voice. “But thankfully I don’t have to do that anymore.”

“Thankfully indeed,” Lucifer murmured as he prepared himself for the chaos that would come. The chaos that would be completely and undeniably worth it, because now, he had you by his side once more.

leviathans-watching - do not copy, repost, or claim as your own