#also arguably toxic codependency

[oceanicairways]

they’re giving jaykyle realness…walk with me

[olliesmoreno]

just realised jaru is toxic yaoi lol

[thestamp3d3]

i cant get over how absolutely insane satosugu is...gege was born to write yaoi forced to write shounen

[sufferu]

Hey never read re zero I don't plan to for some time but I've seen a lot anime and light novel spoilers but why do you think Subaru has more chemistry with Julius than Emilia and rem

Okay first of all, obligatory shilling time: Re:Zero is amazing and I love it and you should absolutely give it a chance when you’ve got some time. Please.

And uh. I’m admittedly not sure how to put this for someone who’s never watched/read Re:Zero, but I’ll try!

At this point in the story, Subaru and Emilia are…very much a slow burn couple, and it’s mainly just Subaru having a huge ass crush on Emilia while Emilia tries to figure out what Subaru means to her. And it’s sweet and wholesome, but currently it’s reached a point where Subaru is doing all the work on a number of different levels — not just regarding his romantic feelings towards Emilia — to the point where it feels rather unbalanced sometimes. I’m holding onto hope that this is intentional and going to be the focus of some development for Emilia sometime soon, but it is what it is for now. But beyond that, it’s really just a matter of Subaru liking Emilia and Emilia wondering if she should return his feelings, and that’s FINE, but it’s not hugely compelling to me. (Also frankly I’m of the opinion that Emilia deciding that her feelings towards Subaru are actually platonic and that she values him more as a platonic soulmate than a romantic partner could genuinely be S Tier storytelling, so.)

Subaru and Rem, meanwhile… Okay, so, I kinda oversimplified things a bit, because those two DO have chemistry. Quite a bit, actually. I don’t think it’s an exaggeration to say that they have one of the most layered, complex relationships in the entire series. But the thing is, it also happens to be INSANELY toxic, with both of them enabling the other person’s worst behaviors and basically leaning on the other in this incredibly interesting codependency that literally only gets shaken by one of them getting erased from existence. (Also Rem is unique in that she is the sole character who is not Subaru who has been directly responsible for an IF Route: one of the possible Bad Ends that the series can go down if the wrong choice is made at a pivotal moment. In almost all of them, Subaru is the one making that choice — except for Sloth:IF, in which the choice is between whether Rem agrees to run away to Kararagi with him or refuses and coaxes him back to his feet during his mental breakdown, thus losing her chance to have him all to herself.) it’s a really complicated dynamic that’s difficult to summarize in one paragraph (I didn’t even bring up how Rem literally tortured him for several hours in a previous loop, to the point where he references still having nightmares about it a full year after the fact) but I hope I’ve given SOME idea for how fascinating it is. Regardless of how interesting it is though, it’s not exactly Final Couple material: everything is pointing to the two of them learning to stand apart from one another on their own two feet.

Julius, meanwhile — there’s a lot here, really, and most of it is pretty woven into the story (which you have not read) but I’ll try and give a couple reasons lol.

First of all, Julius is unique in that he is the only character to actually remember doing something traumatizing to Subaru. He’s not unique in traumatizing Subaru — this man has been murdered, tortured, beaten to a pulp, humiliated, and so much else by like half the cast at this point — but Subaru normally dies and resets to sometime before that happens, and so Julius is the only one who actually did something that Subaru was hurt by and remembers doing it. This, ironically, gives the two of them a foundation for their dynamic that is arguably healthier than the ones Subaru has with most of his friends — especially because Julius has proven time and again that he is a safe person for Subaru to be angry with, because he’s actually been really understanding and tolerant about Subaru lashing out at him over it sometimes without being the kind of overly-apologetic that would guilt Subaru into being quiet. As such, Julius is the One Person who has done something horrible to Subaru that Subaru has allowed himself to feel angry and resentful towards, which is noteworthy because a lot of other traumas have been explicitly recolored as “good memories” as one of his coping mechanisms.

Beyond that: Subaru references his attraction to Julius so many times it’s practically a running gag. He waxes poetic about his long legs, graceful eyelashes, vexing voice, supple hips, and the “strange sensation” that his image inspires within him. I’d say I’m reading into it but I genuinely don’t think I am, because it happens SO MUCH, and (with a couple exceptions, like the guy he went on a two page “there’s another reason I’m on my knees right now” rant for) it’s ALWAYS JULIUS. Hell, even other characters like Emilia reference it sometimes, with Subaru responding by saying that they’re definitely not friends, but “something infinitely more annoying.”

And like — they’re just fun? Their dynamic is fun. They’ve got this playful banter going on every time they meet, they obviously respect each other on a serious level beneath that layer of mutual sass, Julius has this sense of being able to be his real self around Subaru in a way that he doesn’t feel he can with anyone else while Subaru has that aforementioned foundation of “I can finally actually be angry about something that traumatized me for once,” and it’s just — shockingly equal and healthy and wholesome. It’s nice. (I fully expect these two to have some plausibly deniable “very close” relationship by the end of the story that could be read in a number of different ways lol)

[gachagon]

This post delves heavily into Kaiser's backstory that was revealed in recent chapters of Blue Lock. The following content has graphic depictions of child abuse and neglect, so please don't click if that is something that is triggering for you.

I'll be honest and say that i was one of the few people who just originally assumed Kaiser was this rich pompous kid like Reo who's parents probably just neglected him because they were so rich, which is WHY he spends so much time trying to not only be the best but look the best.

But now that we know the truth, and that he actually had what is arguably the WORST childhood out of any of the Blue Lock boys, I think this backstory makes far more sense than what I originally thought.

Kaiser has always been one of the most egotistical players on the field, and I don't think he's ever had moments where he genuinely doubts himself outside of when he's trying to beat Isagi. But we never knew where that ego came from and why he's so hellbent on surpassing everyone. I definitely think growing up in a poverty stricken abusive household with a parent who cares nothing for you would definitely morph your sense of identity into something more than a healthy level of egotism.

And here we can even see an explanation for how Kaiser and Ness got such an unhealthy codependent relationship from the jump. It's not Ness that's the "problem" it's Kaiser (Shocking turn of events wow) Kaiser used soccer as an emotional outlet from the abuse his father subjected him too, but it's the only thing he really has to ground him since he has always been hyper-independent from early childhood.

Kaiser's backstory is interesting because unlike the other Blue Lock boys who's main issue was that they were either too good for soccer, or that the people they played soccer with couldn't keep up, Kaiser's issue was that he ONLY had soccer.

He had no one to compete with and no one to befriend, and his only way of dealing with his home life is by playing alone.

I think this really explains why he treats Ness like a grounding tool or someone to satiate his own ego and worries. He's literally not used to having friends like everyone else, and the one person he did befriend is just as socially stunted as he is. So their relationship just became toxic the more they obsessed over their own personal goals. Kaiser's goal is to become the best, and Ness' goal is to see Kaiser become the best, but when faced with road blocks in their goals they don't know how to handle it all and they immediately end up spiraling.

Kaiser also just doesn't have any healthy coping mechanisms outside of soccer because it is both his goal and his reason for living. So when someone like Isagi who's just an enigma to him stops him in his tracks from being able to succeed, he doesn't have anything after that. If soccer is his coping mechanism but it is also tied into his goals, he can't play it to 'feel better' because it'll just remind him of how he lost or how he's not as good as he should be right now.

I think this panel also explains his whole "choking" thing that Ness walked in on. Now that we also know the origin of the blue rose as well, I find it to be really sad that this symbol of the impossible has been revealed to be tied so heavily with the abuse he faced as a child. It makes the scene where he's choking himself seem less like him trying to "focus" more like he went to also punish himself for being "inadequate".

Even in the panels above where his dad is literally choking him for no reason, his father is telling him how he is worthless and useless etc. It definitely puts into perspective his mindset when he was harming himself.

All this to say that Kaiser has internalized his trauma to a dangerous degree if the current state of his mind is anything to go off of.

[a-secret-bolton-vampire]

Here, another impromptu House of the Dragon essay, following episode 6, which has left me obsessed and delighted to see Rhaenyra finally confirmed canonically queer. This is not refined at all, just all off the cuff.

Rhaenyra and Alicent parallel each other in a lot of ways, but one way that I am not seeing brought up a lot is also the way their new partners add to their parallels. Granted, since Rhaenyra and Mysaria kissed literally last episode there hasn't been a lot of time to think, but it's a sign of a much greater trend between Alicent and Rhaenyra in season 2.

The relationship between Alicent and Criston is a direct parallel and foil to the relationship between Rhaenyra and Mysaria in a myriad of ways:

Criston was spurned by Rhaenyra, and when he was at his lowest moment, Alicent came to stop his suicide and raised him up to be her sworn protector. Ever since then, Criston has remained fiercely loyal to Alicent... to an arguably unhealthy degree. He kills Lyman Beesbury not necessarily because he was against the coup, but because he personally accused Alicent of regicide. He puts Alicent up on an enormously high pedestal, as this kind of saviour of his. Likewise, Alicent is bonded with Criston due to their shared betrayal of Rhaenyra.

The relationship itself is very unhealthy. It's almost like they are codependent in a way. Criston is only where he is now because Alicent saved him. He owes a lot to her. Likewise, Alicent owes a lot to Criston for being her biggest champion. Criston is also fairly lowborn. He's from a very low noble house, and is described as the commonborn son of the steward of Lord Blackhaven. He's just at the edge of nobility, and yet he has been on a meteoric rise, shooting from just another knight to a knight of the Kingsguard, to bodyguard of the queen, to Lord Commander and later as Hand, the most powerful position in the realm after the King.

Compare this with Rhaenyra and Mysaria. Both women have been wronged by Daemon, who has used them for his own ends and disregarded their feelings. Daemon promised Mysaria her freedom if she provided names for people to hire to kill Aemond, but ended up simply fucking off to Harrenhal. There, Mysaria, having lost all she built in King's Landing thanks to Larys, is freed by Rhaenyra who decides to honour Daemon's word. Mysaria is not someone to trust easily, and Rhaenyra freeing her when she had no real reason to shows her worth to Mysaria.

Mysaria doesn't necessarily put Rhaenyra on a pedestal though. She is immensely grateful, and she feels Rhaenyra treats her as an equal and that she is meant to be queen, but there is none of this toxic obsessive codependency between the two (at least, not yet) that is displayed with Alicent and Criston. Like Alicent and Criston, however, they bond through a shared experience of betrayal by someone else, in this case Daemon.

Both relationships are those that would not be looked on lightly by society. Alicent is the dowager queen, Criston is sworn to celibacy, while Rhaenyra and Mysaria are both women in a world where queer relationships aren't exactly viewed in a positive light. Criston and Mysaria are also both contrasting partners, as they are of low rank (though Mysaria is not from a noble house unlike Criston) but are self-made people who climbed to a high position; Criston through his skill at arms, Mysaria through the trade of selling information.

Criston and Mysaria also have a contrasting relationship with the Hightowers and Targaryens. At least in Criston's eyes, Rhaenyra Targaryen betrayed him and brought him low, only to be raised by Alicent Hightower. Meanwhile, Mysaria is brought low by Alicent but raised back up by Rhaenyra. However, despite the gap in the power structure between Rhaenyra and Mysaria being far greater than that of Criston and Alicent, the power dynamic is actually completely opposite.

Season 2 began with Alicent holding power, with Criston subservient to her, with Otto working alongside her. It also began with Rhaenyra being powerless due to the crippling grief of losing Luke and then following Blood and Cheese refusing to make any moves that could hurt more innocent people, which weakens her own standing among her council. But as the season progresses, this gets flipped upside down. When Criston is named Hand, we see a major shift in his dynamic with Alicent. There is a lot of fuss made about Alicent's sex scene with him at the end of episode 2, but this actually conveys this perfectly. Without Alicent's leave, Criston suddenly makes himself at home in her bedchambers, and instead of kneeling to her or letting her be on top, he takes control of her.

Alicent grows more and more distant from Criston as he settles into his position as Hand. Suddenly, Criston feels that by vetoing Alicent from being the regent, he is protecting her from the terrible things they will be doing in the course of the war. Again, this works alongside Criston's weird complex about Alicent being his saviour. She seems so pure in his eyes that he is protecting her by taking on the sins of leadership just as he has protected her all these years as her sworn protector. The problem is that at the same time this devalues Alicent because this is another misogynistic assumption on his part that women should not sully themselves by having a hand with such nasty business. Criston thinks he's protecting her, but at the same time weakening her and making her even more vulnerable, and this is why their relationship eventually falters.

We see the exact opposite with Rhaenyra and Mysaria. Mysaria is at the mercy of Rhaenyra, but Rhaenyra allows her a place in her court as an advisor. Mysaria grows in power in this position, just as Cole did. However, that doesn't come at the expense of Rhaenyra's own power. Thanks to Daemon's reckless, self-serving actions, the Black Council's unhelpful misogyny, and undermining advice, Rhaenyra finds she does not wield influence at court. Except with Mysaria.

With Mysaria, Rhaenyra learns that there is another way to gain power, and that is with the support of the common people. Together, the two conspire to instigate riots in King's Landing and destabilize the Greens hold on the city, while Rhaenyra herself finds that she wants to be spearheading the more militaristic aspects of the war. When Mysaria sees Rhaenyra holding a sword, she says "this becomes you," supporting Rhaenyra's endeavour to take after her idol and hero Visenya and become a warrior queen.

Yet, as Mysaria later tells Rhaenyra, this doesn't in any way make her less powerful. Rhaenyra has treated Mysaria as an equal, her closest advisor, her unofficial Hand (even with Corlys newly named). The mutual bond between the two then reaches a crescendo in a tender moment of vulnerability and gratitude for each other, and their embrace quickly becomes a passionate kiss.

Criston casts Alicent down, but Mysaria raises Rhaenyra up. Criston and Alicent's relationship is based on this shared betrayal by Rhaenyra which became codependent on their united front of this shared history. Meanwhile, though Rhaenyra and Mysaria's relationship does come somewhat from the way Daemon has hurt them both, it is primarily based on honesty and compassion. In this way, as of right now, Rhaenyra and Mysaria are the most healthy couple in House of the Dragon.

One final observation is that I think Alicent and Rhaenyra are also trying to emulate certain people in these relationships. Alicent, always having envied Rhaenyra for her freedom, is finally forgoing any temperance to allow herself to enjoy sex for the first time in her life. Her doing something so reckless is her trying to be like Rhaenyra. Meanwhile, Rhaenyra kissing Mysaria is partially her trying to be more like Daemon, as much as I also believe it is loneliness and genuine attraction to her. She literally states before the kiss that Daemon was everything she wished she was. This may be only the beginning. We are starting to see a much more fiery side of her, as she begins to don the image of a warrior queen who wishes to win this war.

I will also say this, while we are on the topic; it's very meaningful to me that Rhaenyra is canonically queer, especially as a queer person myself. Queer characters are nothing new in the A Song of Ice and Fire universe, but we don't have any truly canonically queer protagonists. Dany and Cersei may qualify but that is much less to do with actual attraction to women and more simply good old lesbian experimentation (not to mention written in a pretty exploitative and male-gazey way). Rhaenyra has shades of both characters in her kiss with Mysaria, but from everything I've laid out, it's not experimentation. Rhaenyra is just bisexual.

Rhaenyra being in a polyamorous relationship with Mysaria and Daemon has been a headcanon of mine ever since Fire and Blood came out, and I've picked up on the vibes between them this season, which made me hearing about the complaints that it came "out of nowhere" really strange, because it truly didn't. It's been building up slowly the past few episodes, and it's just the logical conclusion based on what was presented.

How this will change her relationship with Daemon, I cannot say. But I will say that I believe if Daemon is jealous of Rhaenyra and Mysaria being together, it won't be because of fidelity or homophobia, but purely because they are both women he has been with, which would trigger all sorts of insecurities.

[petrichormore]

really hope this fandom doesn’t boil down Ron’s character and Ron’s relationship to q!bbh as just “haha Stockholm syndrome” because

1. the first ‘case’ of Stockholm syndrome was literally made up by police to discredit a woman. it was made up. Arguably not real. a very misunderstood phenomena.

and 2. Their relationship is so much more complex than that? especially Ron’s motives and decision making, but also q!Bad’s motives as well. They are both completely fucked in the head and fully believe they care about the other (or rather, we know q!bbh is so twisted that he’s come to care about Ron - from what we know this is not a giant ploy to give Ron Stockholm syndrome. maybe it was at first but now he’s just batshit crazy). The toxic codependency they have going on is so intriguing and like whatever it’s funny to point and go “lima/stockholm syndrome” as a generalization but don’t be like “and this relationship is toxic because it’s just Stockholm syndrome” nuh uh. it’s toxic for a million other reasons as well. Get swarmed 🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝🐝

[nemaliwrites]

top 5 miraculous ships?

oooh a fun one...these kind of asks are also lowkey a slap in the face bc it shows me how little i write about the ships i like the most - but also!!! motivation to actually write more for them!

for the purposes of this ask, i'm treating all sides of the lovesquare as separate ships...mostly because they don't all show up in my top 5 HAHA

ladynoir. they are lovers. they are best friends. they are in the most toxic codependent relationship ever. they make each other cry. they send each other memes. etc etc 10/10 no notes

lilanette. if you guys saw HALF the shit @rosekasa and i get up to in DMs, trust me, you would hop aboard this ship with us. it is so toxic yuri in the best way. the implications!!! marinette being the only one to see the truth in the liar! the only one to see her for who she truly is! the london special also fed us for this hehe

felinette. a ship that i think about way more than i write for, unfortunately. but!! SO much potential! toxic het! the two people who love adrien the most in the world! félix naturally rebelling against people in power vs ladybug, arguably the most powerful person in the world right now! do you see it!!!

kittybella. okay, look. i would have NEVER thought about zoé and alya together. but!! scarabella and kitty noire have scrambled me up in a way i never saw coming. they have season one ladynoir vibes! they are friends outside the masks! what's not to like?

ladrien. i will never stop being mad about the fact that ladrien is so underrated compared to marichat - i wasn't in the early ages of the ml fandom also, so i just?? never got it?? ladrien is about the PINING! the YEARNING! the way BOTH of them are SO conscious of their positions and statuses compared to the other person!

[harrowharkwife]

ill go with sex pal :P but if that's already done, gideon :)

HIIIIII!!!!!!! hi friend!!!!!

favorite thing about them: PALAMEDESSSSSS my boy palamedes. my little guy. man, okay, what do i love about him. i love the way he loves. i am fascinated by his clumsy and imperfect and well-meaning but inherently flawed attempts/approaches to things like agency and ethics and fairness and respect. i love that he pays attention to everything. i love his drive. i love his gambling streak, his tendency to play the odds. i love that he's a boy who writes love letters™. i love how open he is about his affections and his feelings. i love his penchant for using terms of endearment. his love for teaching. his willingness to get up on a soapbox for things he believes in, even if he winds up stumbling sidelong into insufferable preachy condescension half the time. i love that he tries. i love that he sometimes fucks up and hurts the people around him. i love his boldness. i love his sweetness. i love his kindness. that boy could make friends with a brick wall if you gave him enough time. i love that he canonically writes weird erotica to cope. i love his taste in women. i love his gender. i just love him

least favorite thing about them: i mean, i could go on forever. he's deeply annoying sometimes, and as much as it's part of his charm, it also makes me want to thwap him upside the head from time to time, like. boy. shut UP!!! but the real answer is honestly his position as sixth house scion. master warden is an unspeakably rancid title in vibes alone and i sincerely hope we dig into the backstory behind that a little more in AtN. i find it fascinating, and troubling, and tragic, and frustrating, all the ways in which he talks the talk re: cavaliers and agency and free will, but when the rubber meets the road, do his actions really back that up? arguably, not always. and the guilt and complicity and codependent toxicity there re: camilla, is like catnip to me. he loves her, he respects her, she's his best friend, he's in awe of her and her abilities and her strength. and yet, time and time again, he puts her through harrowing things and thanks her each time she shoulders his burdens. it's a self-fulfilling prophecy, it makes me so sad, it's a snake eating its own tail, it is a mobius strip of toxic power imbalance codependent enmeshment and it is FASCINATING to think about. if i keep going we'll be here all night, but just. i think fandom has a tendency to write him as The Good Person™ (him and Camilla both) and, like, i love him as much as the next girl, but he's a head of state in an empire, with all the implications that brings with it.

favorite line: "how god takes, and takes, and takes." "fool us twice, shame on god." "thank god for that mad, stubborn, lovely girl." "it's not you, it's me wearing you." (moira quirk's inflection on that line is literally fucking haunting, btw.) "do you know, i miss harrowhark terribly." "and, most personally, this is for dulcinea septimus." god. i just love him

brOTP: harrow, and also gideon.

OTP: im shy <3

nOTP: im struggling to think of a pal pairing that i Couldn't find compelling or at least interesting, if written the right way, in the right light. he's just my interesting little guy. he's a barbie and im making him scissor all the other barbies. who said that

random headcanon: glasses chain. earrings. palamedes can have she/her pronouns, every now and then, as a treat. contrary to the initial assumption of everyone he's ever met, he's actually Not autistic. (cam is; he's just got wicked bad adhd.) jewamedes is also fun

unpopular opinion: i mean i guess just what i said up top re: people sometimes acting like he's never done anything wrong in his life? i love him but i love him Because he is an interesting and deeply morally gray (ha) character.

song i associate with them: what you can't look up by walk the moon, tiny moves by bleachers, to someone from a warm climate by hozier, chateau lobby #4 in c for two virgins by father john misty, shiver shiver by walk the moon, star by mitski, hopedrunk everasking by caroline polachek, GAMBLER'S PRAYER BY CAROLINE POLACHEK my ultimate palamedes song

favorite picture of them: ive tattooed every single piece of palamedes art ive ever seen on the inside of my eyelids. except white palamedes fanart which is always such a jumpscare

[kasunex]

I think Ashley and Andrew make an interesting contrast to Asuka and Shinji from NGE.

Andrew and Shinji both feign as passive, but are arguably the more manipulative and dangerous of the two. They also both end up strangling the other, and in both cases, the other responds with affection.

Ashley and Asuka are both outspoken, emotional, and more focused on recieving affection and validation than Andrew and Shinji, who are the more sexually charged in the pair. Ironically, both Ashley and Asuka are more sexually forward, viewing sexuality as a means to affection - but evidentally worry the other doesn't find them attractive. (Ashley he's your brother, chill)

On that note, both pairings are caught in toxic dynamics in part because of insecurity about the other's affections. This is definitely a lot more understandable in Asuka and Shinji's case, though, given that they aren't too close. Andrew and Ashley are just insatiably co-dependent.

Now that said, I would actually consider their relationships inverses of one another. Asuka and Shinji's problem is that they can't create the closeness they both seek because of an inability to reach out to one another. By contrast, Andrew and Ashley ARE close, and it's clear they are each other's top priorities besides. It's a far cry from Asuka and Shinji's begrudging distance.

But for as close as Andrew and Ashley are, their problem is the opposite extreme to Asuka and Shinji - it's not that their boundaries are too strong, but rather that they are non-existent. That's part of what pushed their relationship from siblings into incest.

Thus, ultimately, Asuka and Shinji can be reconciled with the idealistic but perhaps not completely unrealistic idea of them growing and coming to terms with their own trauma before helping each other. They would just have to learn to accept they other as they are, rather than for their distant front.

Andrew and Ashley's relationship is a lot more complex, and not just because reestablishing boundaries is much more difficult than breaking them down. There's also a much more open question of what their relationship at that point would even be. The incest seems a natural result of their intertwined codependency, thus raising a stronger question of whether they would they even want to establish boundaries in the first place.

[pynkhues]

Sorry if you already wrote about your opinions on nicki's and lestat's relashionship but I'm confused about some interpretations I've seen here and on x. For reference the only book I've read so far is tvl and nicki seemed so tragic the whole time and his relashionship with lestat was obviously always doomed plus they didn't really understand each other.

I just felt sorry for both of them but I wouldn't call nicki abusive and say that he didn't love lestat at all. I don't know maybe I didn't get some subtext or was being too forgiving? But also I don't think they were childhood sweethearts/were solely wholesome either. And I really hope they do their relashionship justice because there is no reason to make them more toxic in order to uplift loustat because nicki literally doesn't exist anymore.

I wouldn't call him abusive either, anon, but I've seen a bit of it recently too which - - mm. I mean, I wish I could say that it surprised me, but honestly it doesn't? Their relationship is not a healthy one, and Nicki is extremely prone to jealousy with Lestat and can be cruel to him, to say nothing of the fact that he arguably forces Lestat to turn him, and then to give him the theatre, but they're two abused, traumatised young men who find, briefly, an escape in one another. There's a really unhealthy codependency in that emotionally, particularly when you add in Nicki's depression, but also with the fact that Lestat's very much relying on Nicki due to his own illiteracy (and it's explicit in the book - he needs Nicki to read the news to him and plays so he can memorise them, and he's his only way to communicate with Gabrielle through letters), and Nicki relies on Lestat to both leave in the first place with Gabrielle's money and to get work in Paris.

It's a complicated relationship - one that's actually, I think, a lot more complicated than it gets credit for being, and I do hope the show depicts that - and like you said, ultimately a doomed one, but not every unhealthy relationship is abusive.

I do think people probably point to the break-up a bit in this where Nicki tells Lestat that he doesn't love him and that he only went to Paris with him because he thought they would both die there, but I mean, the context of that scene is Nicki's reached a breaking point. There might be an element of truth to it - Nicki hates Lestat for being able to move forwards, for people loving him, for finding success in the way he's never been able to - for being, as he says! Filled with light when he is filled with darkness! - and I'm sure part of it too is that he thought that they might die in Paris - but we see over and over again in those first parts of the book that Nicki loves him, and if he meant them to die in Paris, he meant them to die together.

My read of that has always been that he says it to hurt him because Nicki's hurting. He's been so low for so long, and he thought being turned would make everything better and it's made everything worse, and it's just what like Louis tells Lestat that he did in their reunion - he wanted Lestat to suffer because he was suffering. In that sense, their relationships do have similarities, but Nicki's not Louis. Louis can find his way out of it, because at the end of it all, Louis' somebody who survives, even when he wants to die, and Nicki is not.

So yeah, this is all to say that I agree with you. Their relationship is just sad, but it has its moments of genuine beauty and love, that's part of what makes it both tragic and compelling. They're two traumatised boys escaping abusive fathers and an isolated, impovered, ignorant small town, who make it to the city with their hands clasped together, and the world opens up for them in ways that are both wonderful and terrible and only one of them survives it.

[couldtransitionsaveher]

RHYS VON LOUET from CITRUSGROVES' D&D CAMPAIGN

JUSTIFICATION:

"The most maternal cringefail paladin in dnd history, Rhys is stuck is a toxic marriage (Literally. She gets poisoned. More than once), and has seven children she is SO proud of. Rhys is stuck in this marriage as she's severely closeted and in denial, she stays because she feels like she should, since she's been in this marriage for about 20 years at this point.

Rhys has always enjoyed feminine things, and arguably has more maternal instincts than anything (she adopts every sentient creature in a 20-mile radius). She also loves to deny herself things that make her happy (IE. Femininity and stability), and she's also incredibly detached from her sense of identity and clinging on to what little she has left that was given to her by other people.

Rhys's case entirely stems from her codependency on others to define herself and her role in society/life, even when those opinions harm her view of herself. She's scared of looking within herself for validation and to find her sense of self, and she struggles to love herself and find the happiness that she's lacking." - @citrusgroves

Reminder: Submissions are always open! Submit here!

Did you make your daily click today?

[shipcestuous]

The Coffin of Andy and Leyley (Episode 2)

@dragomer: We got canon future incest in The Coffin of Andy and Leyley now in chapter 2.

/

Anon #1: Hiiiii! Have you heard of the game The Coffin of Andy and Leyley? It’s mainly a horror game about cannibalism and murder, BUT it’s centered around two siblings who have a toxic, insanely codependent relationship. They’re really weird about each other but still so very much like your typical pair of bickering siblings. If you have heard of it, it’s FINALLY (yay!!) in early access right now, and part 2 (of 4) is released! Also, (SPOILERS? But it’s technically all over the Steam page reviews) canon content is 100% confirmed to contain explicit, undeniable incest in one of its routes! Like. It’s not subtext anymore. Not even sugarcoating this; it’s depicted pretty straightforwardly. And imo it’s arguably one of the “healthier”—for lack of a better word? bc I don’t think they’ll ever really be healthy by conventional standards—routes for the siblings’ relationship. If you haven’t played it yet, or haven’t checked out the newest installment, definitely recommend! The first ep was great but the second is FANTASTIC

/

Anon #2: Hi, this is the anon who was so enthusiastic about the Coffin of Andy and Leyley a couple of months ago. The full game is now in early access and can be bought on Steam, as the creator has decided (after a community poll) to release the rest of the game episodically. Currently episode 1 (which was the demo) and the shiny new episode 2 are available, with episodes 3A and 3B (different routes based on the choices made previously) being slated for release somewhere in 2024. So, we still have to wait sometime before the full game is finished. But for now, what does Episode 2 – ‘Graves’ offer us? (Warning: some spoilers) The answer is: pure gloriousness. It’s even better than I could've imagined in my wildest dreams. The relationship between Andrew and Ashley is just that amazing. Over the course of the (horrible, awful, and darkly hilarious) events comprising episode 2, we learn a lot more about our favourite pair of cannibalistic siblings. Their not-too-pleasant childhood is explored through multiple dreams and flashbacks, and for the first time we also have segments where we play as Andrew, providing the reader with direct access to what he actually thinks (and feels!) in regards to his beloved sister. And oh boy are his thoughts interesting! A lot of people who picked up on the interesting vibes between them in the first chapter assumed that they were mostly the result of Ashley’s obsessiveness, but this chapter contains an infinite amount of hints that Andrew is actually the one whose feelings towards his sibling are the most ‘romantic’ in the classic sense of the word. The way he physically touches her, the jealousness and protectiveness which was already present in the first chapter but whose full depth we actually see now for the first time, the fact that he regularly shares a bed with her to stave off his nightmares and panic attacks, but then it is revealed that he sometimes fakes them! In one flashback he asks his ex-girlfriend to tie her hair up, which would very obviously make her look even more like Ashley than she already does! At one point he literally thinks this about his sister: “You're struck with an odd urge to pull this broody bitch into your arms, and force her to stay until she smiles. But you push such an idea to the back of your mind. Where it may fester with all the other thoughts you wish you never had.” Ahhh, It’s almost too much, and that’s not even the best part yet of the episode! Depending on the choices you make, a situation can occur in which the siblings have a prophetic dream together (after falling asleep while holding hands! This game is just too much...). The contents of the dream? Well... I don’t want to spoil too much but let’s just say that a canonical incest route has now been 100% confirmed. I’ve already seen the artwork from that scene floating around on tumblr so people who have been following the TCOAAL tags might have seen it already. I could ramble about this game for hours on end but I feel like I’ve been writing and potentially spoiling way too much already. This game has completely taken over my brain and I just wanted to share that. I regret nothing!

/

This is such great news that you all bring! It does sound better than we had any reason to hope for. I will definitely have to play this, but I may wait until it is complete and officially released.

I'm so excited that the creator went full tilt on the incest, and that those of you who shipped it so hard after the demo are being rewarded with such glorious developments.

[forestofforever]

Just thinking about how the dynamic between Benjamin and Sylvester is so different in the Forest of Forever AU while also retaining some qualities from their Captured Crow AU.

In the Captured Crow AU, Sylvester has been lured in by Benjamin and torn down until he became heavily reliant on Benjamin. His mental health has been ruined and he has lost his place in the world, he wants to escape but Benjamin makes it nearly impossible and even if he were to escape, Sylvester fears the situation he'll find himself in once he does. Their relationship is a toxic one, no genuine love on either side, just a messed up kind of codependency with a tremendous power imbalance.

In the Forest of Forever AU, the Heart (Benjamin) is literally responsible for creating the Crow (Sylvester), the Crow would not even exist if it hadn't been for him. The Crow is tied to the Heart and as a result, the Heart can take full control. Still, the Crow in this AU is far less desperate to escape, he does not hate his situation in the way that Sylvester does, it's all he knows after all. Humanity has turned its back on him, meanwhile the Heart provides him with safety and purpose. The Heart is admitedly a bit less heinous than Benjamin, not quite as likely to harm the Crow unless given a very good reason. There is still a massive power imbalance, arguably even bigger than in the Captured Crow AU, but there is also more mutual appreciation and understanding between the two of them.

(That being said, the Heart being able to literally take away the Crow's voice and sense of comprehension whenever he pleases is still pretty messed up).

[catgirl-catboy]

Ship bingo: Tojouma. Since I asked my favourite Ouma (Ougoku) ship before I want to ask my second one

(The same guy is Miu, if you're curious. I love both of them with Miu about the same as I like them together. They should form a toxic polycule.)

I really do like it, but a lot of the content I've seen for it had a Mommy Kink involved, and Mommy Kink in the context of Kirumi makes me nope out of there for characterization reasons. (Not kinkshaming, don't worry! I just don't like it.)

Any Kirumi ship gets the devotion and codependent boxes by default, its just her nature. Also, all Kirumi ships are TRAGIC. This one is arguably the MOST tragic of them all, since (at some point, but I headcanon he knows during Ch2 for angst reasons) Kokichi knows that Kirumi's will to live is fake. From a Kokichi POV, this isn't about no reasons to live vs too many reasons, this is about True reasons to live vs Fake ones.

[roseaceae]

and i won't forget to put roses on your grave

 ִֶָ ᯽ .ﾟ https.inthefieldofanemones.com is the debut mini album of south korean boy band BLUE ROSE.﹙02.13.16﹚

released in the bruising winter of FEBRUARY 2016, the debut album ‘IN THE FIELD OF ANEMONES’ seems to function as more of a return than the debut of a group consisting of well unknown people. the countless creative decisions and specifically designed structure made most question if this album was originally recorded for someone else, how does a group just debut with this? extensive electric guitars and all. true to the spirit which would become synonymous of the group, the album is a look on the feeling of melancholy in all of it's truest forms, a piece of work detailing the cruelties of toxic love, and how, life doesn't always work out the way we may want it to.

though not a smash hit in it's original days, often blasted for ‘trying so hard to be different’, it was clear from the get go that the album was something truly special, a combined collection of five tracks that completely encapsulated how it felt to get kicked down. the album had quite the resurgence in 2018 after each individual track abruptly went viral in their own right, skyrocketing the sales from their previous five hundred fifty thousand to one million. it's safe to say, even if the album didn't exactly fly when it was released, it's remembered as an arguably great piece of music.

 ִֶָ ᯽ .ﾟ . . STATS !

RELEASE DATE 02 / 13 / 16 PROMOTIONAL PERIOD 3 WEEKS UNITS SOLD 1M WINS 1

 ִֶָ ᯽ .ﾟ . . THE TRACKS !

FLOWER ROCK WRITTEN. 梅沢謙三 & 나해일 PROD. 梅沢謙三 & 나해일 WITHERED WRITTEN. 향나무 PROD. 나해일 BLUEMING WRITTEN. 케레스 PROD. 梅沢謙三 & 케레스 A MONSTER WRITTEN. 파란 장미 PROD. 梅沢謙三 & 나해일 REI WRITTEN. 梅沢謙三 & 나해일 PROD. 梅沢謙三 & 나해일

 ִֶָ ᯽ .ﾟ . . the general consensus of the public is that this album is a four (.5) out of five

 ִֶָ ᯽ .ﾟ 𖦹 insight from an anonymous user 021716

‘IN THE FIELD OF ANEMONES’ is a sure fire debut album, an unprecedented identity usually not seen in newly debuted groups.. or bands i suppose you could call them. the album is a weird mixture, because in the never ending winter depression, that's exactly what this album delivers? it's a strange way of expressing “i fucking hate everything” through catchy electric guitar tunes and insanely well shot notes. i'm not sure that the groups exact goal was to attempt relatability through their constant complaints regarding life and everything about it, but if it was, sign me up, it's not something i even knew i needed, but now that it's around, i simply can't stop listening to it.

the opening track, which also happens to be the title ‘FLOWER ROCK’ is so fucking insane i had to check a few times if this was actually a kpop album or not. this song, along with two others on the album, was written and produced by the strangest duo to come out of the second generation of beloved boy groups KENZO & CZR, but even with their questionable friendship that includes the strange ways they refer to each other (it's clear their ‘friendship’ can best be described as ‘a dangerous feat of codependency’), it's clear that the two know music, and the two know how to conceptualize music in a certain way. ‘FLOWER ROCK’ isn't the most telling song, it doesn't have an overarching message, it's simply a catchy rock song with crazy vocals (i greatly commend cupid & ceres), it was the perfect take for title in my opinion, as the general public would probably have a heart attack with any of the other tracks being chosen.

the second track ‘WITHERED’, written by member juniper, is horrifically gloom-ridden. the song delves into the topic of suicide, seemingly more of a diary entry that was turned into a song to spread some message. i have to admit, after the title track got me pumped up, looking up the lyrics of this song really made me sink back down into my seat. it's a harrowing look into the minds of idols that are typically deemed to be “perfection personified”, it's somewhat of a breath of fresh air, something that you don't exactly expect from a debut album. the song also isn't your usual ballad, no, it's fucking aggressive, it screams in your face, it screams the whole way out until it's done. in a way, it's agonizing, but in a strange way, the agony is worth it. i was genuinely surprised, but i suppose that's the point. the song usually bounces between top 3 and 2 for me, but it never goes below that.

track three ‘BLUEMING’ is a cute tune that i would listen to on a friday when classes get too bad and i need to hammer back a few ones (for all intensive purposes that was a joke!). i could dance to it, really, i might just make up one right now. it's definitely a crazy jump, considering we went from a singing about dying to singing about love. the attention to gender neutral lyrics is something i didn't click until my second listen (okay ceres i see how you play..), but it's also kind of cute? thank you ceres we appreciate all you've done for society!! it's not my favorite song on the album, the lovely (pun intended) lyrics give a different look to the album that i assumed would be all sadness. of course not all of the lyrics are.. happy, i assume this song is dedicated to an ex lover of sorts, but if you go into it blind, it seems pretty fun! i'll dance to it in between drinks!! i'll make sure to!

our second to last track ‘A MONSTER’ is a song written by all of the members, and good lord it has no right to slap as hard as it does. the rap?? the instrumental?? maybe we should all just die because who does dione think he is? anyway, my death aside, the song is an amazing contender for title, and should've been at least a promoted bside, i would literally pay for that, i still will pay for that!! (luxe design contact me). it admittedly takes a good getting used to, especially if you aren't exactly in tune with the style they were going for. the instrumental is so strange that i question how they made it work as well as it did, i hope it becomes their thing, i need to hear ceres sing over tweaked soundcloud beats more, but alas.. it's a good song, i'm almost sort of ashamed to enjoy it.

and finally, the final track, ‘REI’, one of my favorite kpop songs of the year by far. coming from one of the many meanings of the name, “soul” or “spirit”. the song is actually so surprising in the sense that you hope it would be cute, but it isn't. again written and produced by our favorite pair of homosexuals (do not sue me for that i totally believe that kenzo and czr have a completely normal friendship), “rei” seems to be a placeholder name for the person who hurt these men, and honestly what the actual fuck did rei do because they are DEVASTATED, who even sings like that!? this track quickly takes it's place as my favorite on the album, stealing the top spot away from ‘WITHERED’, who is really just having a losing battle with ‘A MONSTER’. with all that said, ‘REI’ is the spitting image of heartbreak itself. it's crazy, someone must've really hurt ceres, did you HEAR those notes? give him some therapy!!

all in all, the album was spectacular for a debut album, it feels like these guys have already been around for years, they all seem to have so much experience. i have never seen a debut album like this in kpop, a song about suicide in winter is INSANE, i guess the winter depression is hitting them hard. not to mention, the music videos were like watching some feature length film, i have a lot of hope for blue rose, their name is super cute, and their concept seems promising. though some of the songs had points i couldn't exactly wrap my head around, it's all pretty good music. my formal ranking of the tracks on this album is rei, a monster, withered, flower rock, and blueming. a good start to a hopefully promising career.