#also I don't know if this is even kind of canon!verse or not?

[abyssembraced]

Working on an iterator design for GLaDOS <3

[u3pxx]

PLEASEEE can you elaborate on the gavinners i cant stop looking at them theyre so pretty

sometimes i forget that outside of my friends and servers, i don't really talk much about my gavinners boys* huh! so basically, i originally wanted to make them so i could beef up turnabout serenade in my roleswap au, kind of like turnabout samurai where you have a lot more characters which in turn means a lot more suspects!

but then i realized, wait, i need to make them in the canon-verse first before i could make their swap au counterparts! and so now they exist pftt

here y'all go, i'm gonna be copy-pasting the character descriptions i wrote for them during art fight pftt <3

🥁 DEIDRE MINUENDO

Height: 5'7" (170 cm), 5'9.5" (176) with boots on Birthday: Jul 7 ♋︎ | Pronouns: He/Him, She/Her, They/Them

Deidre is the seemingly gloomy and stoic drummer of the band The Gavinners! At first, it could be difficult to get a read on them but despite all that, they're just like that because they prefer saving their energy. It might not look like it, but Deidre enjoys company even if they're not the most chatty with it and thrives the most when they are around other people (she prefers it if she's around the people closest to her though). Deidre is pretty sensitive and an emotional person even if they don't outwardly express it. To the people close to them, Deidre has a sarcastic streak and can be pretty snappy when it comes to teasing. She can dish it but she can't take it however as they can get slightly irritated when they're teased back. Even if they are a rockstar, they can get embarrassed when people praise or say nice things about them to their face, he tends to brush affection if even if he is secretly flattered by it (he's not gonna admit it though pftt) They also enjoy doodling here and there and like stuffed animals (they have a few of their own!)

Deidre was the closest to Daryan so the events of 4-3 affected him immensely. They felt betrayed and confused and tried to deny that Daryan would be capable of taking another person's life; they scrambled to do everything to protect Daryan from omitting information and even lying on the stand. In the end, all of their efforts were for naught and they felt incredibly guilty for what they've done, especially since she started antagonizing Preston when he was starting to suspect Daryan. They cut themselves off from the group, their job, and stardom. They ended up severely depressed and started to rarely go outside anymore. Only Doremy (Daryan's twin, also a close friend of his) was able to reach him during this time while Viva tried to but he kept refusing to see him. It took them a long time to finally be able to reconnect with the group and it took them a lot of help and support to be able to be well again. Deidre carries Daryan's betrayal to the group heavily and it took a while for her to start forgiving herself.

⚡ VIVA CHI

Age: 25 | Height: 5'9" (175 cm) Birthday: Jan 1 ♑︎ | Pronouns: He/Him

Viva is the lively and energetic bassist of the band The Gavinners! Though he may seem goofy and a little unserious, he actually is pretty responsible and is the mediator of the band (as the eldest brother of his siblings and the eldest of the band, he kind of made that his responsibility). He's a forensic scientist and has always had an interest in science alongside music ever since he was young (he thinks Ema is very pretty but she finds him annoying pftt). Viva was the last one to join the band when they were all in high school and despite his extroverted personality, felt a little shy at the time getting to know a new group of people (it's because Preston was there who he may or may not have crushed at while in high-school.) He's a lover of all things caffeinated (especially energy drinks though he should really pace himself) which isn't always the best match to the fact that he's got terrible anxiety and thinks himself down a spiral when he gets too worried.

Once the band disbanded after the events of AA4, Viva, though left in a bad place with his anxiety shot through the roof, fared better compared to the other members. He tried his best to keep in touch with everyone with varying successes despite Daryan's arrest being fresh and hurt. - visiting Daryan in prison to hear his side of the story - popping in to check at Preston in his office because the guy started to take worse care of himself - contacting Deidre even if she was trying to isolate and cut herself from everyone and looking out for Klavier even if he buried himself in his work He took a break from music like everyone else, he still hopes one day they can meet up and play music again, not even as a band, but as a group of friends who loved creating music.

🦇 PRESTON KEISS

Age: 25 | Height: 6'1" (185 cm) Birthday: Oct 25 ♏︎ | Pronouns: He/Him

Preston is the mysterious yet magnetic keyboardist of the Gavinners! Tall, dark, and bewitching; Preston is aware of the impression people have of him at first glance and likes to use that preconception to surprise and even catch people off-guard by purposely being silly or crass. He has a number of odd quirks and mannerisms that he doesn't realize he has, people tend to notice but they often let it pass because he is very handsome (pretty privilege lmao). Preston can sometimes be mischievous and finds certain things amusing only to him even if others don't find it as funny. He's always had an interest in horror and the macabre ever since he was a young boy which developed into a great fascination with the special effects used in old and new horror films alike. (He can be a bit jumpy when watching movies even if he loves to do it, he can't help it if the movie gets to him!) He plays up his whole immortal vampire schtick because the fans tend to theorize if he really was one. (He is not, he'd love to be one though pftt) Preston is very stubborn and adamant about his opinions and can be difficult to sway if he thinks he's correct; he is also quite awkward when it comes to personal matters, as can be seen in his strained relationship with his older sister and whatever romantic thing he's trying to achieve with Viva. He's used to acting larger than life when the cameras are on but being raw and honest has him feeling a little embarrassed and stilted. Preston smokes and keeps it a secret. (Don't tell Viva that!)

Preston was the first person in the band to start suspecting Daryan which he mostly kept to himself at first but wouldn't deny when you asked him (Deidre did not like that.) After Lamirior accused Daryan in court, Preston was determined to make Deidre confront the truth (unfortunately, not taking in why Deidre might be upset and in denial about it) which caused them to have a fight (with Viva being unsuccessful in de-escalating it.) After the Gavinners disbanded, Preston didn't feel very well after Daryan got sent to prison and lost contact with Deidre (whom he hasn't talked to since the case. [he misses them.]) He seemed fine afterward with his workload seeming to increase though upon closer inspection, he's started taking worse care of himself, skipping meals, and losing his interest in music. Preston has a lot of baggage to sort through regarding his friends and his family that will be difficult and painful for him to confront, but rest assured, he's gonna come out of it happy and well.

and here's a compilation of some very old turnabout serenade drawings too :^]

(i didnt make dei's bday turnabout serenade on purpose, it was a tragic happy accident DFGHDJ i wanted his bday to be 7/7 bc i made daryan 6/6 but then the date. i realize the date orz)

[wood-white-writer]

"Didn't mean to make your heart Blue" || [5/...]

“Where I'll be looking in their eyes when they're down, I'll be there on their side. I'm losing by their side.”

��� Mitski, "Bet On Losing Dogs"

Pairing: Buggy the Clown (Live action) x F!Reader

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 6

Summary: You were an apprentice of Gol D. Roger’s crew in your youth, long before his eventual demise. Along with the Red-Haired Shanks and Buggy, you were a formidable trio; the embodiment of a new generation of pirates yet to come. But times changed, and so did you and your friends. 

It's been a few weeks since the events in Orange Town, and Luffy notices something that others do not. So, he decides to ask you.

Warnings: Canon typical violence, LA!Verse, No (fully bodied) Buggy this chapter, Luffy being the precious cinnamon we all love and must protect above all else, flashbacks about Shanks, past discussions, Luffy and Reader have a heart-to-heart.

A/N: I was initially going to write them going to the Baratie this chapter, but it became too long so next one for sho.

Taglist:@kurinhimenezu, @carpinchootaku, @ay0nha, @teh-vampire-bunny, @lokiscure, @internationalsuper-spy @detectivesparrow , @yuriwk, @notyuralycat, @angeli-fucking-cat, @machinema7k (If you want to be tagged for this story, just send me a message or leave a comment :))

You're sitting by the table in Party's bar, nursing a cold glass of rum against your cracked lips as you observe to the kid - Luffy - demonstrating his newfound Devil Fruit powers without any regard for poor Makino's furniture. 

You don't get him, at all. Then again, you don’t get kids. 

You've never thought of yourself as someone who easily got along with them ... or people in general. Shanks has always been the better-suited one for that kind of work. Whereas he is smiling and grinning at the kid’s mischief, you've barely offered him more than a glance at most.

Your crew has been positioned in Foosha village for the better part of the month, stacking up on resources and food in preparation for your next job. Incidentally, the Red-Haired Pirates also happened to be in town for similar excursions. You rarely see Shanks nowadays since you parted ways several years ago, but whenever you happen to come across one another, you share a drink on his tab.

While your crew is around and about, replenishing their strength and vigor for the work to come, you're content with just sitting here at your leisure. When you're not plundering or fighting or attacking Marine bases, you can't find it in yourself to do much of anything anymore. 

Nothing adds any purpose to your life save for what keeps you fed and clothed, which in the life of a pirate, simply means pirating.

"I've heard you had good fortune on your latest heist," Shanks says from where he's sitting opposite of you. "For your efforts, the Marines have granted you among the highest bounties in all of the East-Blue."

You hum noncommittally in response, not offering much to the conversation in terms of merriment. "The quality of the Marines has been in decline. It says more about their effort, or lack thereof, than mine."

"Do you know what they call you nowadays?"

"They call me a lot of names, you got to be more specific."

"'Cross-Hairs, the Beast of the East'. It's got a certain ring to it, don't you think?"

"Sure."

Shanks smiles the kind way he always does. Always has done.

"Gum-Gum Pistol!" 

The sound of yet another chair breaking has you rolling your eyes without even looking, and poor Makino ages ten years in seconds across the bar counter. 

"Luffy!"

"Sorry!"

Shanks laughs heartedly at the display, only to cut it short upon noticing Makino's even glare sent his way from across the bar. 

"You were careless," you state matter-of-factly and take another gulp from your drink. "You should've kept the fruit hidden more securely."

"Now, in my defense, I didn't think the lad would searching through my loot."

"Well, you should've." You slam your glass down, strong enough to leave a dent in the wooden surface. "What kind of captain leaves his loot undefended and unsupervised? Especially when it contains a Devil Fruit?"

Shanks doesn't argue with your statement and settles with taking a gulp of his own drink, letting your words simmer in his head. "You're right, I should've been more observant. Now, it'll be more difficult for him to achieve his dream."

"His dream? Of what? Becoming the King of the Pirates?" Try as you might, there's no suppressing the snort that escapes through your nose. "There's only ever been one King, and we all saw what happened to him. What do you think is going to happen to a kid who can't even swim?"

"Oh, come off it!" He gives you a playful nudge to the rib, which you reciprocate with a glare. He remains undeterred. "You mean to tell me you've never thought about finding the One Piece? Not even once?"

"I have no interest in whatever plunder Gol D. left behind." 

"Then, what does interest you?" He rests his elbow on the edge of the table and leans over to your side. "What is your dream?"

You grit your teeth under your lips, a flash of blue circulating in your head. "Dreams are for fools and children," you point your head to where Luffy is currently sitting, trying to put the chair back together with a half-empty tube of glue and little luck. 

"Come on, I know you better than that. Surely there's something in this world you want more than anything?"

"What I want is ..." You have half a mind to tell him the truth, whereas the other half wants to push the idea further down to the bottom of your chest. "Is another bottle of rum."

You raise your arm to Makino to gesture for another one, but Shanks is quick to lower it with a gentle shove of his arm. You flash him a scowl and brush off his hand, but unlike your crew or anyone else, he's not afraid.

"The point which I'm trying to make before you're completely pissed," he starts. "Is that no matter how much opposition one faces, it's that dreams are never out of reach if you have the will to reach for them."

He inclines his head over your shoulder, and you turn around to see Luffy successfully putting the chair back together. You don't know how he did it - it looked pretty busted minutes ago - but there it is, wholly intact.

And when the boy smiles, it's so vibrant and full of joy that it's almost blinding. He proudly runs over and shows the repaired chair to Makino, who proceeds to pat his head and hand him a plate of food.

"See?" Shanks grins. "Nothing is impossible."

"You can hardly consider putting a chair back together the same as achieving an impossible goal."

He shrugs. "Maybe not, but you won't know unless you try. All it takes is a little spirit."

You watch Shanks for a couple of minutes in silence, processing his mythic words, then shift your attention over to Luffy who's preoccupied with shoving an unholy amount of food into his mouth. If this is to become the future King of the Pirates one day, then it'll be an interesting future indeed.

"A little spirit, huh?" 

— — —

You're sad.

Luffy first notices it when you leave Orange Town, and it lingers throughout your voyage. 

For as long as he's known you, you've always been a person of relatively few words; never speaking unless you feel the situation requires it, and only acting when necessary. Even following the Kuro situation™, getting the Going Merry, and adding Usopp to his crew, he can tell that you're not all there anymore.

Not to be mistaken, you're not conspicuous with the way you behave. You still act like usual, talk like usual, however little, and commit yourself to your work on the ship, almost to an excessive extent. 

All in all, nothing’s changed about you. However, he’s gotten used to your face and general lack of expression most of the time, and though it doesn't seem to alter, he still catches onto the fact that you're sad. 

"Hey," he asks the group and props himself in the kitchen, legs crossed atop his seat. "Do you think she's any different?"

"Who? Your friend?" Nami asks, raising an eyebrow. "How so?"

"Well, I think she's sad."

"Doesn't look any different to me," Zoro supplies while polishing his swords on the table. 

Usopp's in the middle of munching a piece of loaf, and answers with his mouth still halfway occupied. "Dunno how she usually is, but she's kinda terrifying if you ask me."

"No, she's not," Luffy dismisses lightly. 

"What's her position on the ship, anyhow? How'd you come across her?"

"She's always been with me," Luffy answers without any thought. "And she’s a good fighter.”

Zoro — to everyone’s surprise — nods his head to this in concurrence.

Their Captain claps his hands together to get the subject back on track. "But anyway, I just think she seems kind of down now."

"How can you even tell? With eyes like these, —” Usopp puts both of his index fingers at the crow’s feet of his eyes and draws them back to imitate yours. It’s borderline shameful, truth be told. “— I can’t tell for shit what she’s feeling or thinking.”

“I just can.” Luffy shrugs.

“Has she said anything?” Nami asks. “Anything to make you ask?”

“No, not really.” He heaves a sigh and props his hand under his chin, contemplating. “But she's been different since we left Orange Town.”

"If you ask me," Zoro speaks up. "You should ask her about her relationship with that fucking clown."

"Who? Boogie?"

"Buggy," Nami corrects. "Didn't you notice that at the end? They have a history, it's obvious. They know each other, and I don't know what pirate customs are like nowadays, but I doubt you'd touch the face of an enemy unless there was something going on. Has she said anything about it?"

Luffy shakes his head. “No... but then again, she never does tell me much about anything unless I ask.”

The tangerine-haired girl blinks as if the answer to this whole predicament is obvious. She quickly comes to realize that, to Luffy, it’s not.

“So…” she prompts slowly.

“So…?”

She rolls her eyes at his inability to catch her drift. “Go ask her.”

It’s like the thought never even crossed Luffy’s mind in the first place because truth be told, it hasn’t. He lights up like a candlestick on the spot. “Yeah, I should just ask her!”

“Ask me what?”

The members of the Straw Hat pirates (save for Zoro) withdraw in various unique positions, having not heard you make your entrance before you speak. 

You’re standing in the doorway to the kitchen, eyebrow slightly quirked at the Baroque-esque scene in front of you. Deciding not to address the display, you simply ask, “Anything I should know about, Captain Luffy?”

Usopp doesn’t even dare to answer, because he knows you sure as hell don’t see him as a captain in general, much less your captain. He swears he notices you briefly look in his direction at the mention of the title, and a shiver runs across his skin. Like static electricity in the air.

“Oh, yeah,” Luffy turns to you, not an ounce of fear in his eyes as he pops the question. “Are you sad?”

You blink once, then twice, like the inquiry on its own is of unfathomable origins to you. “Do I look sad?”

The boy in the straw hat nods. “I think you do.”

“Then I’m not.” It’s not only an answer, but also a sentence that marks this subject as finished on your part. One that does not permit any subsequent additions.

You incline your head to the deck above. “We’re going to have company soon, likely Marines, and they seem to be in supply of heavy fire this time.”

———

The situation with the aforementioned opponents temporarily distracts the crew, yet Luffy maintains a close eye on you, taking note of anything that can point him to the source of the unknown problem. You talk relatively little with the other crew members, but you seem to have developed an amicable enough relationship with them compared to when you first met. 

Before, you could care less about getting to know them. Now, you’re actively going out of your way to ask Nami about her cartographic skills, even giving her tips for additions to her geographical detailing. You provide Zoro pointers on self-developed defensive techniques and ways to paralyze opponents in certain spots (which he seems appreciative of).

You even give Usopp a short nod when he tells you one of his fantastical stories, even knowing that they’re full of shit.

Luffy’s happy, but he still sees that you are not.

It’s all in your eyes. They’re hollow somehow, like the end of a barrel. He doesn’t know how he knows, only that he knows, and he’s known for a good while now.

So, that night, Luffy finds you in the kitchen by the windows, absentmindedly snacking on a red apple while you gaze into the dark nothingness outside. He also discovers that he’s subconsciously become quite observant of your habits as of late. 

For example, you specifically pick red apples above any other color when they happen to dock someplace, not even paying any mind to the green or yellow ones. Just the red ones.

“Hey,” he positions himself next to you on the bench, a piece of loaf tight in his hand. “Why are you sad?”

You turn your head just a fraction to the side to look at him, not annoyed, but not appreciative of the focus he’s settled on as of late. "Shouldn't I be asking you that? The Vice-Admiral looks a little weary as of late, after all. Are you sad about it?"

"Nope."

“So why do you insist that I’m sad?”

“Because you are,” he states like it’s obvious.

You huff humorously and return your attention to the window that supplies no real view. “How can you tell?”

“I just can.” He takes a generous bite of his food and continues talking, oblivious to the crumbles that fall while doing so. “When I’m sad, I—”

“Eat?”

“Well, yeah.” He swallows the bite down. “But I also like to talk about it with someone I trust. Shanks used to say that true friends are the kind of people you can share your heart with and not get hurt.”

This annoys you, that much he can tell. A nail digs into the apple you’re holding, leaving a crescent-shaped indent on the red skin. “Shanks said many things, and not all of it's true.”

This doesn’t deter him from pressing on the matter. “If you keep all the hurt inside, it’s going to turn bad. You know, Makino said that if you leave a piece of ham in the fridge too long, it’ll get sour and people can’t eat it.”

“Only you could find a way to compare this sort of thing to food.” You withdraw your finger from the apple and end up leaving it alone altogether. A minute or ten of silence waves between you, laced with unspoken questions and denied answers. “Tell me, Luffy, just how much did Shanks tell you about his past?”

He thinks for a moment, mimicking your movements by putting his loaf aside. “Just about his adventures with the Red-Haired Pirates, and a little about the time you served with him. Is it true you were strong enough to throw a three-hundred-pound man to the ground when you were thirteen?”

He swears it’s a snort that he catches leaving your throat, but it’s hard to differentiate it from your more-than-usual scoffs. “He exaggerated.”

“Really?”

“The man was two-fifty, at most.”

Luffy grins with genuine admiration, so much so that your face tilts back slightly, being overwhelmed by the mere brightness that is him. “Wow! You must’ve been quite a beast when you were a kid!”

He notices it again, the sadness that latches onto your eyes like insects to sour meat. Whatever brief smile adorned your lips moments ago disappears like it was never there at all. Thinking he said something wrong, Luffy prepares to apologize when you speak again.

Your voice is soft yet faint like you’re afraid speaking too loudly will make something bad happen. “It wasn’t just me and Shanks, back then, you know.”

The Captain of the Straw Hats thinks it’s almost unnatural of you to be this demure, but he doesn’t interrupt you.

“Buggy was there, too. It was the three of us, together.”

“Oh, yeah.” He remembers it now. “He did mention that in Orange Town. You served the same crew.”

“… He did, did he?”

“He said you and Shanks betrayed him, but I didn’t believe him.” Luffy knows you and has known you for longer than he’s known a lot of people in his life. You’re one of the few permanent people he’s had, and he knows with a certainty that you’re not the kind of person who leaves anyone behind, not without reason. 

Even if you did have a reason for leaving Buggy, it must have been a good one.

Your mouth opens and shuts several times in the span of a minute like you’re hesitating to talk about the past. You’ve never been one to talk about it, except to share some details about your time as captain, and even that was limited to the bare minimum.

Still, Luffy, being in no hurry for you to reach an answer, waits patiently by your side until you do decide to talk about it.

Talk about what he believes is the reason for your sadness.

“We were close back in the days,” you begin slowly. “Me, him, and Shanks. It was us against the rest of the world, and we were going to sail together to the end of the seas one day. It was our dream.”

“Then, what happened?”

You put your palm over both your eyes and rest your elbow on the window frame, heaving a sigh that resembles someone who’s spent too much of their life working and working and working without catching any breaks. Pure, simple exhaustion weighs you down, Luffy can tell. 

When you speak next, you sound tired too, and perhaps a little strained. He can’t see your eyes, and so, he can’t truthfully tell what you’re thinking now. “The thing is, I don’t know what happened. All I know is that he decided he didn’t want to stick around.” You breathe through your nostrils. “Our captain was gone, and so was the crew, but we three were still together, and I thought we were going to stay together.”

“But you didn’t.”

“No … We didn’t. I don’t know what happened, but one day when I was talking with Shanks about what to do next, Buggy came in, and it … He looked at me like … Like he hated me.” You exhale. “He did hate me, and I don’t know what it was I did, but he practically told me that we were done … And then he left. I never saw him again, up until Orange Town.”

Luffy doesn’t require your eyes this time to tell that you’re sad now because you are. You’re so sad that it’s destroying you from the inside, and even that is an understatement on its own. There are no tears trickling down your cheeks, no quivers or thickness to your voice, no nothing to base his assumptions on, but he knows.

He stays silent for a short while, doing nothing but look at you. You’re one of the strongest people he knows. He’s seen you fight; seen the strength you possess, the fire in your eyes. You’ve stayed with him ever since Shanks left Foosha Village, you’ve looked after him from the sidelines when you thought no one was watching. 

You’ve been with him throughout everything, and seeing you like this makes him feel blue on your behalf. You don’t express it yourself – you never do. You carry your weight with the same kind of strength you always do, never letting anyone see you beyond just that, and sometimes, he wonders if you’re lonely because of it. 

At least, now he knows why you’re so sad. You’re heartbroken.

He’s never been acquainted with the feeling himself, has never felt any particular inclination toward it, but he can tell it’s your heart that’s hurting now, and it’s not as easy to heal as that cuts he received on his chest from the butler.

His hat seems to itch the harder he thinks about it, as if there’s something digging at his scalp through his hat. He thought Nami patched it up for him. He tries to scratch at it, but for some reason, it doesn’t cease. Maybe he’s got lice? 

He ignores it. “It’s weird. Bunky seems to think you were the one who left him for Shanks.”

“I didn’t.”

“I know. You’re not that kind of person.” He says it so easily, without a smidgen of doubt or hesitation. You look at him through your peripheral vision, and your eyes slightly widen at his statement. “But, do you know what happened between them? Shanks and Bonky, I mean?”

“No, I don’t.” You admit with a shake of your head. You’ve tried to figure it out for years, and at some point, you decided to give up. “Shanks never told me, but whatever it was, it was enough for the stupid clown to leave for… He chose a childish rivalry over me.”

“Then, there you have it. It’s all just a big misunderstanding, so why don’t you just tell him if you meet him again?”

“You seem awfully defensive of the guy who destroyed an entire village and almost drowned you.”

“Yeah, but talking about him seems to make you happy.”

You freeze for a bit, snort, and turn your back to the window frame, leaning back and crossing your arms across your chest in silent resignation. “I tried to explain things to him back in Orange Town, and a fat load of good that did. Like I said, he hates me, and he’s sure as hell not my favorite person at the moment. If we do meet again, it likely won’t end any better than it back in Orange Town.”

“You know, –” Luffy takes another bite of his bread. “It didn’t sound like he hated you.”

“Hmm?” You raise an eyebrow, halfway curious and halfway skeptical. 

“He still remembers that you like red apples and that you hide knives in your shoes. Is that true?”

You raise both your eyebrows and look at Luffy like he’s just grown a second head. Without a word, you pull your left foot up until it rests on the bench, and withdraw not one or two knives, but four. Small and subtle, hardly enough to turn any heads, but in a flash, you throw it across the kitchen until it lands on a specific spot on the opposite wall. 

Bull’s eye.

“We used to have knife-throwing competitions,” you reminisce idly, staring at the knife lodged deep into the wall. “I was good, but Buggy was better.” Your lip tilts up an inch or two. “We made bets, and whoever lost would have to steal a bottle of whatever liquor we happened to find in the next town we docked at.”

“Oh?”

“I ended up snatching quite a lot of bottles, but once every blue moon, he would have to snatch one instead.” You smile. It’s an actual, genuine, honest smile this time, and Luffy can’t help but marvel at the sight. It’s a rare thing for you to smile like you’re doing now. It’s usually brief or sarcastic and never seems to reach your eyes. 

This one does.

He thinks you look pretty when you smile. It’s your smile, and it’s so warm that he wishes you could do it more often. He tells you as much, and a red color falls over your cheek. You promptly turn your face to the other side to save face, and it makes Luffy think.

When he thinks about his dream of becoming King of the Pirates, he can’t stop himself from smiling ear to ear. So, that begs the question: “What is your dream?” 

What makes you smile?

“My dream …” You reach for your apple and hold it against your face, the uneaten side of it shining against your face. “Is unattainable.

“I don’t think it is,” Luffy says without missing a beat and takes your hand in his, determined to make you see that. “I think that no matter how much stands against us, dreams are never impossible if you have the will to reach for them. All it takes is a little spirit.”

He doesn’t know where those words come from, but he’s heard them from someplace, and judging by your staggered reaction, you’ve heard them too. 

“A little spirit, huh?”

“Exactly! So, please tell me, what’s your dream?”

You look straight ahead into the room, resting your elbows back on the window frame without a word. He thinks you’re about to decline his question or ignore it altogether. However, he’s surprised to hear you actually answer this time, truthfully too.

“My dream was to sail the seas with him again.”

Suddenly, the itchiness on his head stops, and it stays that way.

[agnesmontague]

tmp - tma connection theory

i do not claim full credit for this as @anthonyampersand and i were bigbraining it (and screaming) in chat together but our current theory for how Archives and Protocol connect are as follows :

tl;dr : TMP and TMA are a setup for each other's premise respectively, feeding into each other like an ouroboros. we know that TMP is on some level a "sequel" to TMA (i.e. celia may possibly "remember" events from TMA that we know to have "already happened", such as the eyepocalypse) but it's entirely possible that events in TMP will influence those in TMA in turn, without much concern for actual temporality.

more specifically : it appears, at least so far in the canon, that fears in the TMP universe haven't really split themselves into categories the way they do in TMA. we've seen a case that sounds an awful lot like a Slaughter statement (the bloodthirsty violin), with others that overlap across several Smirke Fears (the very first one read by norris is a healthy mix of Stranger and Lonely, it appears to me), and others that don't strike me as being any particular fear (a malicious, hungering liminal space...? Spiral, Lonely, Extinction...?).

this is ironic because, well, the protagonists' very job is to do that kind of categorization. Dolls comma Watching, or Dolls comma Skin? it's the very type of job that smirke himself seems to have tried to undertake in TMA-verse (and ultimately succeeded). which means....

maybe there ISN'T any fear-categorization in this world prior to the OIAR. maybe, in the end, the way to "defeat" whatever Fear(s) stalk this world is to split it up into little parts that antagonize each other, and then send them away. in short, the OIAR crew are who will send the Fears into the TMA-verse in the form we see them in TMA.

there are some other indications that time may be a flat circle here. why did lynne hammond suddenly change her name to celia in s5 of TMA? why would it suddenly "feel right" to her out of the blue, unless it was the name she vaguely remembered using Elsewhere? of course, since TMA was written before TMP was even conceptualized, it's not extremely likely that it was some kind of deliberate foreshadowing back then ; it is however possible that they took this little detail to build TMP to fit "retroactively" with it. the archives of the magnus institute in TMP-verse being pristine and free of papers could indicate a sending-away or timeline-wide interference as well. and to say nothing of hilltop road, of course...

the tagline for TMP is "Fear takes many forms". sure, it's a pun (fear receives a lot of paperwork). but perhaps it's also a warning for what's to come. fear takes on many forms, in TMP--perhaps even as many as fifteen?

[astaroth1357]

Most to Least Likely to Cry After Sex

Okay so, this might be a personal thing on my end, but I have long kept a running list of characters that I believe would cry after having sex. It is a perfectly natural response and there is absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about if it happens ... though it is surprisingly entertaining to think about in terms of fictional characters. And of course, I have a list for OM as well.

Contents: Nsfw/suggestive, depending on your definition, but not explicit. Emotional vulnerability explored.

~♡♡♡~

Levi

I think anyone could see this coming. Levi almost certainly has cried or would cry after sex. And depending on what you're doing, he may even cry during sex too.

Bless his little heart, it is 100% because he is always riding an emotional rollercoaster of the highest highs and lowest lows. The realization that somebody out there actually wants to be intimate with him would send his whole body into a meltdown. Have patience.

Mammon

Also kind of a no-brainer. He's only a little less likely to cry than Levi because he's better at putting up a front when he really wants to.

Unlike others on the list, Mammon gets super embarrassed if he gets overwhelmed and cries after sex but he rarely tries to hide it. It's kind of his way of reaching out for more affection, he wants to be coddled and reassured that his partner accepts him no matter what. He thrives on unconditional love like that.

Satan

Hear me out. Satan is canonically a kinky little fucker, I don't think he would cry after an especially "playful" rendezvous. It would be the really soft and intimate moments that get him everytime.

We have to remember, he's still a little new to this whole "experiencing feelings" thing. An emotion as overpowering as love is going to flatten him like a steamroller. He won't even realize that he is crying until his tears start staining the sheets. Be gentle. Talk him through it. Again, it's perfectly natural if it happens.

Belphie

I think Belphie will cry for bratty purposes more than anything else. I am wholly convinced that he will cry on demand if it gets him what he wants.

Lord forbid the MC tries to go anywhere before Belphie is ready because he may just grab onto them and start the waterworks. If you could withstand the full force of a pouty, teary-eyed Belphie begging just "5 more minutes" of cuddling, you're a stronger person than I am.

Simeon

Only lower than the other guys by virtue of having quite the stranglehold on his inner emotions, but he will let them out if he's comfortable to do so.

Let me be clear, Simeon wants to cry everytime. He wants to lose himself completely in his partner and let it all wash over him. It's just the social and moral questions surrounding what's happening that keep him from doing so. (Poor thing #1)

Asmo

Another person who can cry on demand or just get overwhelmed, but it won't happen often.

Put quite simply, Asmo's been around the block. He has a pretty good handle on himself even during his come downs. However, he knows how much it could mean to your partner if you're willing to show that side of yourself to them. So if MC says/does something that genuinely touches him, he will cry without shame.

Diavolo

Would almost certainly get misty-eyed if he was with someone he truly cared about. He may not cry, but he'll have to rub his eyes some.

Make. The. Prince. Feel. Loved. The realization that he has someone that he doesn't have order or trick into staying around would floor him. He's far, far too well-versed in maintaining a certain image to fully breakdown, but those feelings would all still be there regardless.

Lucifer

Also gets misty-eyed, particularly after make-up sex.

He would rather sheath his own nails into the skin of his palms than get caught crying, but if he really screwed something up (and was willing to admit it) then he would get a little vulnerable in the moment. It would be fleeting, though.

Solomon

It can get to him a bit, he's a pretty lonely guy, but he's more likely to make a joke or say something out of the blue just to hide from his feelings.

I don't think Solomon quite lets himself ponder or self-reflect on things that genuinely upset him. He's very goal-driven and future-focused, so indulging in these softer moments would be foreign to him. If he ever feels like crying, he'll immediately try to distract from it rather than letting the feelings out. (Poor thing #2)

Beel

I just don't see him crying. He's very comfortable with himself, he doesn't really repress his emotions, and he knows he's well-liked and well-loved. Beel would be just fine.

It's not a Solomon situation, of course. Beel does self-refect and he genuinely engages with others. I just don't think this would be a shocking level of intimacy to him. He already loves others about this deeply to start with, so just expect a really smiley Beel!

Barbatos

To be clear, Barbatos can cry and he has cried before in his life. It just won't ever be after sex.

Similar to Solomon, I think Barbatos lives his life with a certain level of detachment from the world around him. He wouldn't get overwhlemed after sex because he can't. It's not that his mind is elsewhere, it's that he blocks himself from getting too emotionally invested in such things to begin with. (Poor thing #3)

[rwrbficrecs]

First monthly faves for 2024 !! ❤️

Leave a message by @sherryvalli (book-verse)

@dot524: In the mood for some cute, heart-melting fluff? This is a one-shot that recounts Alex’s voicemail messages over the years from those who care about him - including Henry.

would you be my love, my love? (would you be mine) by ohprongs (book-verse)

@wilmonsfolklore: a strictly come dancing AU with a lot of feelings that I've been thinking about ever since i read it!!!

even though we know it isn't true by @matherines (book-verse)

@wilmonsfolklore: for everyone struggling with academic pressure, or anyone, really. it's pretty sad but of course there's comfort personified in Henry!!

beyond infatuation, how obsessively i adore you by @waterloolovers (book-verse)

@wilmonsfolklore: a new fandom classic if you ask me. Henry works at the daycare Alex's daughter goes to and their relationship progresses really naturally. the kid content in this fic is some of the cutest i have ever read and this is the perfect fic to go on your reread list for comfort.

And They Were Roommates by @14carrotghoul (book-verse)

@na-dineee: Alex and Henry get to know themselves and each other after they move in together. This story is not sugarcoated at all, very realistic - just how life is, and so so sweet. Also, unfortunately, rather short, but still worth the read - as are many other stories by this author, such as the 'Las flores' series.

Spirit of the Season by @pridepages (book-verse)

@heybuddy-drabbles: A little late to the game but I finally read E.J's Christmas story. Her way of story telling doesn't disappoint in this shorter tale (by her standards). It's not lighthearted and it touches some difficult topics (mostly canon) but it's all worth it because of the way they fall in love through Christmas Eve/night. Can't recommend it enough!

Where There Are Octobers by @iboatedhere (book-verse)

@na-dineee: 31 short chapters that are just really fun to read! Some are post-canon or canon-compliant, others are AUs - but in all of them the characters are so beautifully drawn, true to how we know and love them! A vet AU, a hospital AU, major fluff, even an X-Files AU - and who knows, maybe one or two dribbles will turn into more?! Fingers crossed!

The Art of Losing by bigfishbigpond (book-verse)

@dot524: If you think the mid-story breakup should have been longer and more angsty, here’s the story for you. An interesting and heartfelt story of what Henry and Alex are like apart, and what pulls them back together.

I know that you hate me (Do you though?) by @arand0mdutchgirl (book-verse)

@magnificentandcoolfez: A bit of good ADHD angst (with some comfort ofc). I like the focus on how hard adhd can be and it's a short and good read for those who like comfort that comes in the shape of your crush holding you until you feel grounded again.

blushing ears and beating hearts by @kill8a (book-verse)

@na-dineee: This story is not just slow burn, it is glacial burn. It's an college AU, set in New York, and so slow, so tender, so fluffy - after reading it I was floating on cloud 9 for quite a while. I don't know if you feel the same way, but it's funny how changing one given variable somehow changes the whole dynamic between the two of them. Or is it just me?! Either way, it's so wholesome to tag along as their love blossoms, I still feel so hugged and cared for.

all so human with our guards down by @maxbegone (book-verse)

@myheartalivewrites: a post-apocalyptic story that is unlike any other. There are no zombies or gore, but instead it focuses on rebuilding and the softest love growing between Alex and Henry, surrounded by family and friends. I kinda wanted to live there by the end of it.

The Snow Prince by @orchidscript (book-verse)

@zwiazdziarka: several fairy tale tropes meet to create this absolutely amazing story. It has dreaminess of a fable, best kind of yearning of your favourite slow burn fics and a little bit of adventure of a fantasy novel.

but to say that I'm a rainbow, to tell me that I'm bright (when I'm so used to feeling wrong, well, it helps me feel alright.) by What_Is_A_Mild_Opinion (book-verse)

@zwiazdziarka: Fandom is really sleeping on this one! This story is a canon rewrite with characters reimagined as creatures with animal characteristics. The wordbuilding is so fantastic that even if you are not a fan of long fics following canon step by step, it's absolutely worth to check this even for a chapter or two and get to know these wonderful versions of Alex and Henry. (Alex is literally rainbow.)

safe with me / more than I ever (in a thousand years)by @indomitable-love (book-verse)

@na-dineee: I think the author is very well known among all rwrb fanfic readers. I really, really liked these two stories, like a lot: Two 5+1 fics, one from Pez's point of view, the other from Bea's - unfortunately both characters are given too little attention in the book imho. As expected, both narrators are sharply observing, protective of Henry, loving, honest, tender - and you end up loving Henry (and Alex) even more.

check out our past Monthly Faves here ❤️

[diminuel]

At this point Dragodile have so many kids from various AUs, I love it! It’s funny to think about maybe the most canon version or a canon-adjacent version of Luffy who is still in denial that 1) his dad fucked croc and 2) croc gave birth to him meeting some Devil Fruit user who through crazy DF powers for Reasons I Can’t Explain (except my amusement) brings all of Luffy’s AU siblings into his universe and the Straw Hats are stuck with a bunch of various age kids to take care of until they can figure out how to get them home…. and Dragon gets a very confusing snail call (“Ew Dad, can you please stop making babies with Crocodile?!”)

*INTO THE DRAGODILE VERSE*

(Not asking you to draw or anything, but just thought it was a funny idea to imagine and chat about! lol)

Time to torment Luffy! We haven't done that in a while *lol*

Maybe this is an universe where Dragon and Crocodile have not had any other kids (yet), so Luffy is struggling to erase his memory about Crocodile's relationship with his dad (and generally his involvement in Luffy's birth) while also keeping a bunch of Monkey D. children from going overboard or eating all his food. And no, he will not answer any of his crew's questions about who these insane kids are - though of course the kids can answer these questions themselves because they most likely know Luffy and his crew in their own universe.

(And this is a bit random but I'm taking this chance to ramble:

I do still wonder in what kind of AU verse(s) the kids actually exist. I've drawn 4 OC babies (Merry, the twins, and Mini Dragon) that are biologically theirs who may or may not exist in the same universe. Baby 2 and another pregnancy do exist in the Divorced AU. I think Mini Dragon might exist in an universe where there are just him and Luffy, considering Iva's comments. (And of course I also have a whole armada of Crocodile DNA experiments that I don't have any plans for *lol*)

Then there's the Stinky Child AU where they probably "only" have their three stinky children. Even though they wanted more, it just didn't happen for various reasons.

In the Chaotic Family Time AU Vivi (who may or may not be Crocodile's child) and Robin are probably also somehow part of the family but I don't know if they have more kids or if they're just happy to just trust that the fates will put a child in their path that needs parents X3)

[whipped-for-kpop-fics]

Starlight Eyes ~ B.SK

🌟Who; Boo Seungkwan x female reader (Y/N) 🌟What; Fluff. Seungkwan-centric. Some hurt at the beginning(I don't know if it's classed as angst or not). Briefly mentioned background memberxmember relationships. Reader is older(3 years). Staff!reader. Idol/canon verse. 🌟Wordcount; 14k 🌟Warnings; Alcohol consumption (nobody is shown drunk though). Period talk. Mention of doctors. Suggestive themes. Adult language/profanity. Seungcheol's injury is mentioned a few times. :(( I think that's it but please let me know if I've missed anything!

🌟Summary; The past months together were supposed to be his way of forming a connection with you that would allow you to see him in a romantic manner like you had started to with Seungcheol last year. But it seemed it had just made Seungkwan's feelings burn brighter and his crush turn into something more.

Ao3 link -Find my other writing here -

A/N; This was originally a self-indulgent story with an original character, not a reader insert so there may be some OC stuff I missed during editing so sorry if you see "her/hers/she" when it should be you/yours. Also, I know nothing about the members' personal lives so ignore any inaccuracies there, this is just fanfiction, it's not supposed to be realistic. <3

After all these years, all this time, now that everyone was finally accepting that it would never happen, it happened.

"We're dating," Jeonghan informed the group at large, his right hand holding Seungcheol's left, fingers laced and the older looking very shy as he smiled down at his own feet unable to meet the eyes of any of the 12 in front of them.

"Uh, should I leave?" You asked awkwardly, hands hovering over Minghao's head from where you had been playing with his hair.

"No, why would you suddenly leave?" Jeonghan asked confused, giving you a genuinely bewildered look.

"Because this sounds like family stuff not-"

"Don't," Seungcheol warned, lifting his head to land a firm look on you. "Don't try and say you're not one of us, Y/N because you are."

"Yeah, you're our girl," Jeonghan agreed. "We wanted to tell all of you together, you all should know about this at the same time."

"Okay," You agreed softly, not looking entirely convinced but you turned back down to focus back on playing with Minghao's hair in the way he only really let you do.

Seungkwan wasn't really aware of what was said after that because his attention was on you and the downturn of your lips. You weren't very close, the two of you, though you both still did value each other greatly; just like all of Seventeen did with you and you returned those fond feelings. You had been one of their staff for a while; mostly closest to 95 line as you were the same age as them, and had taken on the role of Seungcheol's personal physiotherapist despite the fact that you were actually a makeup artist. But all 13 young men adored you and you loved them all back just as much so your role was much more than just another staff member to them. Still, Seungkwan didn't really spend any time with you alone and that was okay for you both. But he still had always easily noticed your mannerisms and quirks, so he noticed the way you started to shrink into yourself as the others all congratulated the new couple, after making them both promise that it wasn't some kind of joke that Jeonghan had convinced Seungcheol to go along with. Seungkwan noticed you wilt and didn't understand how no one else did.

To celebrate the new couple, you all went to karaoke, even if you didn't drink and never actually sang but you always watched with a smile, just happy to be involved and thought of. Though this time, Seungkwan noticed you take the shot of soju that Seokmin had poured then promptly abandoned to run screaming excitedly over to the machine and join the song, already tipsy. At that point, Seungkwan stopped drinking.

Although Seungkwan did see you swallow down a fair few drinks over the night while no one was looking, you didn't really seem any different; smiles a little lazier and slightly cuddlier than normal as you tucked up against Wonwoo- who mostly stayed in his seat at your side- but still pretty much the same you as always. Seungkwan wondered if the older man noticed his companion drinking too or not.

Inevitably, as it happened every time you all hung out, you got up after a while to get some air and have a break from all the noise. Wonwoo smiled at you as you got up, his own smile a little drunken making you giggle and pat his cheek fondly before you left the room, putting a bowl of snacks in Soonyoung's hands as you passed him. You were always taking care of them like that; in little ways that added up to a lot. It wasn't a surprise that they all loved you an awful lot.

After a few minutes, Seungkwan got up and said he was going to the bathroom, not that anyone really noticed, then went out of the room, then out to the little courtyard designated for smokers but he knew you liked to sit on the bench right in the corner out of the way. "Hey," He greeted gently when he was close enough, causing you to lift your head up from where it was tilted back against the wall behind you with your eyes closed.

"Hi," You replied in the same tone while lifting your head more to watch him sit too.

"Everything okay?"

"Just needed a break, you know I need to escape it after a while."

"Mm, I know, but I meant more that you've been drinking."

"Ah, you noticed?" He hummed in confirmation. You sighed and tilted your head back again to stare up at the sky ahead; dark and too full of light pollution in the city to see the stars. "It's sad, isn't it?"

"What is?"

"That real beauty is hidden from us because we as a species rely on the artificial too much."

"Uh, that was deeper than I expected." He admitted, making you laugh. He smiled a little, glad that you weren't feeling bad enough to not laugh, and then he shuffled to copy your position and look up at the sky. "You'd like Jeju; there's this hill I go to when I visit my family, I never see as many stars as I do right there."

"Sounds peaceful."

"Mm, it is."

"I'd like to see that one day. If we're ever in Jeju together, do you think you could show me?" You tilted your head to look at him. He felt your gaze on him so he glanced over and then tilted his head too to meet your eyes in return.

Sometimes, Seungkwan really loved that you were the exact same height; being the same level made a lot of your professional interactions a lot easier when you had to adjust his makeup on set. But at times like this when there was already something hanging heavy in the air and Seungkwan's own chest had been twisted horribly for the past hours, he kind of hated it, that your open gaze was level with his. He could never escape it when you looked at him.

"Yeah, I'll take you wherever you want, noona." He replied honestly, tone a touch past just gentle now, turning more soft. "Even if we aren't scheduled to go to Jeju together, I'll take you one day when our schedules allow it."

"Really?" He nodded and you lit up. "I'd really like that, Kwanie."

"Mm, me too." He agreed, making your smile widen as his own turned up one side of his closed mouth. "That doesn't really answer what's wrong though. I'm pretty sure you're not really drinking because of not being able to see the stars." You sighed and turned your head back skywards though Seungkwan kept his full attention on you. He couldn't help but imagine what you would look like with the starlight reflected in your eyes instead of the orange of the fairy lights strung up in the courtyard. Still, artificial light or not, Seungkwan thought you looked beautiful. "Is it hyungs?" He asked carefully, not wanting to make things worse but wanting to get to the bottom of this to try and figure out how to make it better. "Coups and Jeonghan getting together? I…You like Coups-hyung, right?"

"I…no…a little." You admitted with a heavy breath. "I knew I never stood a chance anyway, he's been talking about asking Hannie out for weeks now so I really knew it was coming."

"You did?" Seungkwan was genuinely shocked. "Your response seemed like you didn't know."

"I didn't know when it was happening, or if Cheol-ah was actually going to have the balls to do it, they've been on the cusp of this since before I even met you all, after all."

"Mm, they have." He confirmed. "You really aren't hurt over it?"

"No," You laughed a little. "I'm happy for them, they're good together regardless of romantic status. I don't imagine much will change with them anyway, they've been very unsubtly sneaking off to make out and probably fuck for a while."

"What?" Seungkwan muttered dumbly. "They've been what?"

You looked at him and upon spotting his flat expression you straightened up with an amused expression. "You didn't know?" He shook his head. "Oh, here I was thinking you're one of the observant ones, you always notice when I need something."

"That's you though." He replied without thought then blushed and looked away, back up at the sky. "Uhm, like, it's easier to see when you need something compared to them because they've always been close and affectionate and disappear randomly so it's normal."

"Ah, I see." You hummed in understanding and tilted back again.

The pair of you were silent for a few minutes as Seungkwan focused on calming his racing heart and heated cheeks. He really thought that he had given himself away then. "So," He started, tone back to gentle. "If not because you're hurt, why are you sad, noona?"

"I just…" You sighed heavily. "It's fucking stupid."

"If it hurts, it's not stupid."

"I'm not usually bothered by this, I'm just…I don't know, sensitive, at the moment. Hormones, you know?"

"Mm," He hummed a little, understanding that you were referring to your incoming period. It wasn't something that you ever discussed with any of them exactly, though you did usually take time off every month routinely so the group had very early on been worried and asked you if something was wrong at home or something. And then you had very honestly said that it was because your period pains were worse on those days and you couldn't face people. Ever since, the guys had always had your favourite chocolate and snacks delivered to your apartment on those days to cheer you up a little; and you always hugged them all extra tight on the day you returned. So Seungkwan did know that you were due any day and even had a symbol on his personal calendar to remind him; he always intended to send you flowers but could never gather the courage to do it. He thought he was a lot like Seungcheol in that way. But at least everyone had known that Jeonghan returned Seungcheol's affection, nobody knew if you returned Seungkwan's feelings, or even that he had those feelings in the first place.

"Do you…do you ever just see people being all happy and in love and it just hits you that you don't have that?"

"Oh," He swallowed a little, surprised by your words because you had never seemed to care about romantic relationships for yourself even if you were all for others finding love. Honestly, some of Seventeen had even entertained the possibility that you were aromantic. So you saying this right now and admitting to being upset over being single was genuinely a shock to Seungkwan. "Yeah," He agreed in a soft exhale after a few seconds of absorbing your words. "Quite a lot, honestly." He chuckled a little, embarrassed and scratched his neck awkwardly. "I didn't expect it to be something you think about. That sounds mean, doesn't it? Or rude. Just not nice. I'm sorry-"

"It's fine," You giggled and reached over to take his hand into yours and hold it on the wood of the bench seat between you. "I don't; think about it really, I mean. Like I said, hormones prompted it today. I'm usually fine single, you obviously know that I'm generally not interested in romance. "

"Y-yeah, you've never dated in all the time I've known you." He was staring down at your hands between you. It wasn't the first time that you two had held hands but it was the first where you were having a conversation about romance in what could be considered a romantic setting, fairy lights and the night sky. Seungkwan was half convinced you could feel his racing pulse through your connected palms.

"I don't gain real attraction easily." You admitted softly. "In any way. I can see someone and think about them in a sexual manner but I wouldn't ever do something about it. I need a connection first, for either romantic or sexual relationships. But I don't like meeting people, it's too much hassle and anxiety so I'm not really giving myself the chance to develop any connection with anyone. I think that's mostly why I started to like Cheol because we were spending so much time together during his injury that we got closer and I'm not stupid, he's a wonderful, attractive man."

"Hyung's great." Seungkwan agreed quietly, mind whirling with all the new information.

"He is. You all are." You squeezed his hand gently, sending his heart tripping over itself a little which only grew when you adjusted your hold and your first two fingers slipped through the gaps of his last two. You had never locked fingers before. Seungkwan was halfway to a heart attack, he was certain. "I didn't expect anyone to notice something is, well not wrong; I'll get over this quickly, but not right I guess. Even Wonwoo didn't seem to notice and he's been next to me for the past two hours. It's always you, huh?" You turned your head to look at him again. Seungkwan took a breath before he bravely turned his head to look at you and meet your fond gaze. His breath caught in his throat and that heart attack was coming on very quickly now. "You always do so much for others, Seungkwan-ah, you work so hard to make others happy and feel loved. I hope that you feel it back tenfold. You really deserve it, you know?"

"Noona," He breathed out, feeling all his affection for you rising up to his throat. If he wasn't careful, it was going to come tumbling out so he pressed his lips together to hold it in.

"You'll let me know, won't you? If there's something I can do to make you happy, Kwannie." Those were dangerous words because all Seungkwan wanted was your lips on his, to know how you tasted behind the peach soju that you had been drinking intermittently all night. "Hm?" You prompted when he didn't say anything, his gaze just roaming over your face and trying to stick on your mouth as much as he was trying to not let it. "You'll let me know-"

"Kiss me," He blurted out breathlessly, eyes now glued to your lips and unable to look away.

"Wh-what?" You stammered, lifting your head to look at him utterly gobsmacked. But Seungkwan didn't really notice what your expression was doing as he straightened up in time with you, drawn like a magnet to you in a way that he usually had such good control over but his heart wasn't letting up and he didn't even realise that he was leaning in. Seungkwan's lips barely brushed yours before your hand was free from his and you were pushing him back, touch still gentle even as you cleared yourself space to get to your feet. "What the fuck?" You whispered, staring down at him with wide eyes of pure shock.

And that was what had Seungkwan's own eyes widening as he registered what had just happened, what he had just done. He had asked you to kiss him and then made the move himself when you had been too shocked to react otherwise. He had been so drawn to your soft-looking lips that he hadn't even paid attention to you properly. But now that there was distance between you and your fingers were no longer linked with his, Seungkwan knew.

"I'm so sorry," He rushed out, whole body flashing between hot and cold as panic and guilt squeezed his heart. "I-"

"We should get back." You spoke, voice odd, almost cold but not quite. It made Seungkwan's heart turn to ice in his chest. You were looking at him as if you didn't even know him and it hurt so much. You didn't wait for him to respond before you turned and went back into the building.

Seungkwan couldn't will his body to move, stock still with pain and fear. He had never wanted to confess to you in any way because he was certain that you didn't return the feelings and liked Seungcheol as of the past months; since you had headed back to Seoul with Seungcheol from Japan after tour while the rest of them went to Italy to film Nana Tour. Seungkwan had immediately noticed that something had changed when he saw you two face to face upon returning to Seoul but he hadn't been brave enough to confront you about it and just cradled his bruised heart closer to his chest. But now, what Seungkwan didn't want to happen, happened; you had rejected him. You pushed him away and broke his heart with a still so gentle touch that he honestly wished that you had been brutal, it would've somehow hurt less than this. Seungkwan was left there, heart in pieces not just for the rejection but knowing he had really messed up and now, he really wasn't sure if you would want to call him a friend any more.

How long Seungkwan sat there was an absolute mystery, he didn't move a single muscle, just sat there, staring brokenly wide-eyed at the door, tears silently slipping down his cheeks and hands gripping the edge of the bench either side of his thighs.

And then.

"Boo?" It was Hansol, stepping out into the courtyard in search of his best friend. But upon seeing Seungkwan's distraught expression through the glass of the door, Hansol's heart had seized with worry. "What happened?" He asked, rushing over to kneel on the slab in front of Seungkwan, one hand on Seungkwan's pressed-together knees and his other tenderly wiping the tears away, though more fell as Seungkwan came back to reality and he realised he was crying.

"I-I really fu-fucked up, Nonie," Seungkwan choked out before breaking down into sobs that made Hansol's heart break into pieces and join his best friend's on the floor around them.

It wasn't until they were tucked up in Seungkwan's bed together, Seungkwan's eyes swollen from his tears though no longer falling that Seungkwan actually told Hansol what happened. He hadn't really been in any state to talk at the karaoke bar and Hansol hadn't wanted to risk someone walking in on his fellow idol bawling his eyes out. So Hansol had tried to take Seungkwan back to the room yet he refused, making Hansol call Junhui out as one of the designated drivers for the night. Junhui did have every intention of complaining about being forced to drive them home and then come back, but upon seeing the state of the young man on the bench, Junhui drove them home before going back to the karaoke bar without a single complaint.

The pair were still alone even though they had taken the time to shower and attempt some kind of skincare routine for Seungkwan around his sniffles but he didn't have the heart to care and Hansol only had so much knowledge. Still, they both had clean, soft skin when they climbed into bed together to cuddle up in the way Hansol knew always soothed Seungkwan.

"Are you ready to talk about it now, Boo?"

Seungkwan curled up smaller against Hansol's chest, the younger on his back, his left arm around Seungkwan's back but folded up to run through the older's hair, his right hand over Seungkwan's left on Hansol's chest. "I fucked up."

"Mm, you said. With what? Y/N-noona?" Seungkwan flinched a little, confirming Hansol's words. "She left before I came out to you, she told me to check on you. Did you have a fight?" He sounded as if he didn't even believe it was possible; Seungkwan and you fighting, which was pretty true really as you two had never butted heads in any way.

"Not exactly." Seungkwan's voice was barely audible, half muffled against Hansol's chest and just very quiet anyway because he didn't really want to speak these words but figured he should. It was about time he told his best friend the truth. "I…I kissed her." Hansol tensed a little, genuinely surprised at his friend's words. "Well, tried to. She pushed me away."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"I didn't know you like her that much. I've noticed you treat her differently to other women but I figured it was just because she's different to us all anyway, staff but a precious friend too. I thought it was mostly that and maybe a little crush but for you to try to kiss her? You really like her, huh, Boo?"

"Yeah," He choked out and turned his face further into Hansol's chest while gripping at his t-shirt. "I like her so fucking much th-that my heart is broken right now. S-she pushed me away and looked at me like-like she doesn't know me. I'm so fucking scared I've ruined everything, Vernon. Wh-what if she ne-never talk-"

"Alright, take a breath." Hansol soothed, knowing Seungkwan was on the verge of breaking down again and honestly, Hansol was not strong enough to handle that again. Seungkwn held on tighter as he obediently focused on taking some deep, slow though relatively unsteady breaths until he could breathe evenly again. He slumped back against his best friend and turned his head back around. "You haven't ruined anything, Seungkwan-ah." He promised. "Y/N-noona is not the type of person to ditch someone precious to her because of a love confession."

"I-I didn't confess." Seungkwan admittedly quietly.

"What?" Hansol mumbled puzzled. "You just randomly kissed her?"

"No. I asked her to kiss me first but I guess I just, got caught on the thought and leaned in without really realising."

"Uhm, okay and why did you ask her to kiss you?"

"Because I'm a fucking idiot." He huffed. "She was just…" He exhaled heavily. "It felt a lot, sitting there with her like that and she was talking and saying things and I just always get so caught up listening to her and stuck in how much I like her and she was holding my hand and you know I'm so weak for hand holding and she-" He took a much-needed breath when Hansol tapped his back a little, a silent reminder to breathe. "She basically told me to tell her what she can do to make me happy because she said I do so much for others and deserve to feel as loved and cared for as I make others feel and I just…"

"Asked her to kiss you?" Seungkwan nodded, cheeks warm enough that Hansol could feel the increased temperature easily through his sleep t-shirt. Not that he'd point that out. "And then you kissed her and she shoved you back?"

"No, not shoved just, pushed really gently. I think I'd prefer she had shoved me. Somehow, the soft touch hurts so much more."

"It's because she cares about you, Boo, too much to be so harsh with you. That's good, it means she won't want to lose you over this either." Hansol soothed, hand back in Seungkwan's hair and right thumb brushing over the back of Seungkwan's left hand. "It'll be okay. It might be a little weird at work tomorrow but it won't last."

As it turns out, Hansol was wrong, not because it was weird at work the next day but because you didn't turn up at all.

It was five days before Seungkwan saw you again; you had called off like you did every month though usually it was only a few days, not five. But you had answered the group chat like normal and just said it was just a little extra pain this month and you were fine and did not need Mingyu to come over and feed you handmade soup as it was just a period and you were not ill. The others had been persuaded and simply sent you more treats and funny videos while you were gone. But Seungkwan was convinced that you were avoiding him and well, Hansol's frown told Seungkwan that his best friend had the same thought.

When Seungkwan did see you, however, he really hadn't expected to. He was at a solo photo shoot for one of the brands he was an ambassador for and saw you waiting in his dressing room when he entered. You were dressed ready for work; supply belt strapped around your hips and a makeup brush in your fingers as you twirled it absentmindedly where you were leaning back against the counter in wait, eyes on the empty chair in front of you.

"Noona," He mumbled as he stepped through the open doorway. The brush flew out of your fingers at his sudden voice, making you both yelp a little as it pinged across the room. You both stared in the general vicinity of where it had fallen on the floor somewhere out of sight, then you huffed an amused laugh and pushed off of the counter.

"Come on, they told me to deal with you myself seeing as it's a simple outfit and look today." You mused, motioning him in as you walked over to the clothing rack where only one outfit was set up in wait; jeans, a t-shirt and a soft cardigan. "Kwan-ah?" You prompted when he remained in place. You looked over at him. "Are you going to come in and shut the door or are you changing at the threshold in view of everyone?"

"Right," He mumbled and stepped into the room, closing the door behind him then slowly approached, twisting his fingers together nervously as he neared. "J-just us?"

"Mm, we've worked with this team enough that they trust me to pretty you up alone, not that you need prettying up." You smiled at him, teasing as you tended to when talking to the guys about how attractive they were. But your smile faltered a little when you took his features in properly. He looked paler than usual with dark marks under his eyes and lips a little dry. "Kwan-ah," You breathed out, putting the hangers back on the rack to free your hands so that you could turn and delicately take his face into your hands. Seungkwan immediately felt his eyes sting a little with the threat of tears. He had been so scared that you would never touch him again that feeling your skin so tenderly against his own felt like an awful lot. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you." You spoke softly, thumbs gently brushing over his cheeks. Your lips turned down further as you watched a tear drip down his cheek. "I never want to hurt you. You truly are someone I value greatly, you know that, right?"

"I-I was scared you wouldn't anymore."

"Silly boy," You teased, the left side of your mouth quirking up a little. "Knowing the wonderful man you are, how kind and caring you are, I really don't think there is anything you could ever do that would make me stop caring about you and want you in my life."

"You were gone for five days, noona."

"Yeah, I know." You frowned and started to lower your hands but he quickly put his own over your wrists and held you to him; you didn't try to pull away again and let him lead your touch back to his cheeks obligingly. He wasn't usually one to ask you for affection so you really weren't going to turn him away now that he finally had. "I just…I was being a coward. I was scared too, about how this would go, seeing you again after that. I felt so bad for leaving like that but I just…ran away. I'm not very emotionally competent, Kwan-ah," You admitted with a little pout that made his lips quirk up a little. "I've never been in that situation so I didn't know what to do. I should've just faced you the next day and not made you suffer these past days but I used my upcoming period as an excuse. If it helps though, I was genuinely in more pain this month so we both suffered."

"That doesn't make me feel better." He answered with a concerned frown. "I never want you to suffer, even if I am, I never want that for you." He brushed his thumbs over your wrists delicately. "Is everything okay? Why was it more painful?"

"I don't know, just one of those things I guess." You shrugged carelessly making his frown worsen.

"Noona, you can't be so careless about your health. What if it's a sign that something's wrong?"

"I can't go to the doctor because I had a more painful period than usual, Kwan-ah," You sighed, gently pulling your hands away to reach back and grab the hangers. He let out a displeased breath but obediently followed the silent instructions and removed his shoes to kick aside carelessly while unzipping his coat to remove. "They barely take periods seriously anyway, a one-off will be dismissed and a waste of my time going for."

"If it's worse again next month, you will go then?" He tossed his coat aside blindly in the direction of the couch. It fell short and landed on the floor but he didn't care.

"They'll dismiss it." You informed simply, watching as he removed his hoodie to also toss aside.

"Please, for me?" He requested, stopping with one arm out of his t-shirt to put his hand to yours over the hangers pleadingly.

"Fine," You conceded with a heavy sigh. "But if they just dismiss it, I get to say I told you so."

"Mm, okay. I'll even buy your favourite ice cream." He chuckled, taking the clothes from you to take to the couch and get changed there.

Even though Seungkwan was not particularly confident in his body he had changed in front of you so many times over the past two years- it was all part of being an idol with staff members around all the time during outfit changes- that he didn't even stop to think about the fact it was the first time that you two were alone while he changed, in a shut room. At least until you approached to start folding his own discarded clothes neatly so they didn't crease. And then Seungkwan looked at you, his own trousers around his ankles from just pushing them down and freezing. You could definitely see his dark boxer briefs as the plain white t-shirt stopped just below the waistband of his underwear. Suddenly, he was very self-conscious and aware of the fact you were alone and he had felt your lips brush his.

"Are you being Seungcheol?" You teased noticing him just stop and stand there. You didn't even look up at him and instead lowered down to your knees in front of him making his chest tighten and his fingers grip the edge of his borrowed t-shirt while he swallowed thickly. You didn't even notice, your hands were already on him; one on the back of his left calf and the other on the hem of his trouser leg. "Up." You encouraged. Numbly, Seungkwan lifted his left leg to allow you to pull his trousers off over his sock and then put his foot down before you swapped to his right leg to repeat the process efficiently. You leaned back and laid his trousers on the couch before grabbing the jeans off of the hanger.

It wasn't the first time that you had physically dressed a Seventeen member; Seungcheol especially since he hurt his knee, had required help with his trousers, socks and shoes and although he was healed now and capable, he still pouted at you until you helped him. Jeonghan could be pretty lazy too, especially near the end of concerts so you had more than once literally stripped him down to his boxers and redressed him when he was being too difficult for other staff who did not have a close enough relationship with the guys to do as much. The first few times had made Jeonghan blush and flustered for a while after, but these days he let it happen without any fuss. Mingyu was another who wanted to be doted on like Seungcheol, though he either went into playful flirt mode which always resulted in you either pinching or biting him depending on if your hands were busy, or he got shy and made it difficult for you as he tried to hide away despite whining for your help in the first place. The others always wondered how you could put up with Mingyu like that but you just shrugged and said it didn't bother you really as your job was to get them ready for the fans or cameras. Nobody ever pointed out that your job was only to do their makeup but you always went above and beyond what you were actually paid for. They liked you doting too much to want you to ever stop. Though they often tried to convince their higher-ups to increase your pay, something you genuinely were clueless about. The only time you had ever refused to help any of them dress was the one time Wonwoo had very uncharacteristically boldly called you over after a Hip Hop Unit stage, dressed in red leather and shining with sweat. You had taken one look at him and dismissively turned to touch up Jihoon's makeup again even though you had just finished. Nobody really knew what happened for you to refuse, though they were pretty sure it was some kind of disagreement between you two as you had both been kind of tense before that despite usually getting along really well. Seungkwan had actually suspected you two to be dating around that time and it was a lovers quarrel, but then he walked in on Wonwoo and Mingyu making out a few days later and realised he was very wrong.

"Are we tucking today?" You asked when the jeans were up over Seungkwan's ass and on his hips though still open. "Mm, it doesn't look long enough to tuck." You commented in answer to your own question, head tilted a little as you looked at the t-shirt still grasped in Seungkwan's grasp.

The door suddenly opened making Seungkwan inhale in slightly panicked surprise. Though to his relief, it was Hansol who entered, a carrier with three drinks in it balanced on his palm. "Uh," The younger male spoke, eyes wide on the position of the pair of you.

"Didn't know anyone was coming to watch Kwanie today." You commented after smiling in greeting at the young man while he awkwardly entered the room and shut the door behind him. You turned back to Seungkwan and reached out to do his jeans up for him, with hands now skilled at dressing and undressing others.

"Uhm, I heard you'd be here today so I thought I'd come like, check in," Hansol admitted, putting the drinks on the counter. Seungkwan gave his best friend a grateful looking knowing he actually meant that he was there to be moral support for Seungkwan.

"Ah," You made a noise of understanding and pointed to the shoes by the rack. "Grab those, would you?" Hansol nodded and quickly grabbed the shoes to take over and hand over. He stood a few feet behind you and silently watched as you helped Seungkwan into the shoes and made them all neat before you got to your feet.

It was very clear to the youngest that Seungkwan was feeling some things from having his crush, you, on your knees in front of him and clearly you had been there for a little while dressing Seungkwan, judging by how wide his eyes were and red his cheeks. Hansol wished he could help his friend out in some way but there wasn't anything he could realistically do.

You made short work of getting Seungkwan into the cardigan before leading him over to the makeup chair to get started. All while Seungkwan just let you. He kept his lips together and eyes big on you to watch you move around and take charge of getting him ready for the photo shoot so naturally that he wondered why you ever said that you didn't like being in charge of people. You always handled the guys so well and often delegated tasks amongst the staff yet when you had been offered a higher-paid position as head makeup artist, you had refused on the grounds that it was too much responsibility and pressure being in charge. Seungkwan wondered if you actually realised how much the rest of the staff and even the 13 idols listened to you, especially during changes backstage at concerts. You didn't get paid to take charge but you were the only one willing to get physical with the guys to get them where they needed to be or step in to calm them down when their tensions ran high.

"You haven't been doing your routine." You commented when you were leaning in closer to Seungkwan to carefully work on adding the tinted balm to his lips, the last step of the standard natural look routine you did to them all for these calmer shoots.

"Sorry," Seungkwan whispered back, fingers twisted in the hem of his t-shirt again; it was very creased at this point but neither of you had even noticed.

"Shall we do an intensive session later? We haven't done one of those in a while."

"Really?" His heart thrummed excitedly at the thought of spending an hour alone with you taking care of his skin. He always felt so relaxed and content after those sessions but it had truly been a while since your last, months.

"Mm." You hummed in confirmation, then leaned back and stepped away to give him the freedom to get up. You looked at your right hand where leftover balm was on the tip of your middle finger from dabbing it to his lips, then at your empty left hand. You usually had a tissue in hand but you hadn't picked one up today. Seungkwan looked at the counter with every intention of grabbing a tissue for you but your usual box wasn't there, nor your wipes. Without warning, you turned and approached Hansol and held his jaw in your clean hand to apply the balm to his lips. He had been kind of alarmed at the sudden grab, even if it was rather gentle in your true fashion, but quickly understood and just stood still and let you. He even smacked his lips together when you pulled your right hand back, making you giggle. Hansol smiled at you and Seungkwan watched, looking between you two and, not for the first time, he noticed how good you looked together. Then again, he thought you looked good next to any of his members. He wondered if anyone ever thought that he looked good with you. Probably not.

"What's going on with Boo's hair?" Hansol asked curiously, causing you to turn back around to Seungkwan.

"I don't need to do anything, Kwanie already looks handsome enough," You informed, though approached to run your left fingers through his hair a little just to fix the strands that getting changed had messed up.

"Seungkwanie is really handsome already, huh, noona?" Hansol grinned to himself as he watched Seungkwan fluster a little at your genuine praise.

"Mm, people will be more interested in Seungkwanie than the product," You continued, knowing Hansol was baiting you to tease his friend and willing to play along.

"Stop," Seungkwan whined a little. "You're being ridiculous."

"Excuse you, I am being honest." You scolded and gently tilted his head upwards to meet your eyes. "You're beautiful, Boo Seungkwan." Even with the concealers and foundation on his skin, Seungkwan's resulting blush could be spotted.

Hansol watched Seungkwan's expression melt under your honest gaze, nothing but pure unfiltered adoration in his eyes. Hansol wondered if Seungkwan had always looked at you in that way when he thought that no one was looking and able to call him out on it, or if it was now something he was unable to hide since his truth came out. He wondered if you saw Seungkwan's gaze and knew what it meant, how the kiss wasn't his full truth.

Since that day at his solo shoot, when Seungkwan had more personal time with you than he ever had and really understood that you truly saw no change in your relationship despite the kiss attempt, he had slowly invited you to spend time together more and more. He had always wanted to spend more time with you but he had been too scared of his feelings coming out and ruining things, but that had already happened and you were perhaps closer than you had ever been.

Over the past few months, you went from seeing each other pretty much just at work or when you were hanging out with other members and Seungkwan happened to be there too, to texting every day often with video calls at night as you both unwound and did your nightly skincare routines together, and spending time together alone outside of work with none of the other members.

At first, Seungkwan had been worried that you wouldn't want to spend so much time with him but you had always happily agreed to spend time together and had even started to suggest hanging out yourself; at first with something specific in mind like visiting something that you felt you'd both enjoy or to get a meal, but then you would just ask to hang out with no plan in mind. The first time you had admitted that you had no plans and just wanted to spend time with him, Seungkwan had honest-to-god almost burst his heart through his chest like something out of an old cartoon. It still made his heart flutter madly when you would skip over to him and cutely hold onto his arm to request quality time with handsome Seungkwanie, but he had a much better control over his heart these days. Well, for the most part.

"What are we doing here?" Seungkwan muttered alarmed, heart racing with nerves in his chest as he woodenly followed you into the bridal boutique; the same one he had visited a few weeks ago with his sister to pick up her wedding dress and his suit.

"Unnie said she's put aside a few options for me." You replied simply.

"Options? For what?" He worried, following you over to the reception desk. "Noona?" He hissed desperately but you were already talking to the staff; the same woman who had served him last time. He was wearing a mask and cap this time but he was pretty sure the woman recognised him based on the smile she shot his way. He bowed a little in polite greeting. Seungkwan felt so out of his depth even as he was led over to the dressing rooms and told to sit on the couch, just like his first visit here to help his sister pick out her dress with her best friend and their mother.

And then he was alone as you went into the room and the staff wandered off, though returned minutes later with a few dresses all in the soft lilac Naeryin had picked for her bridal party, him included. Seungkwan's throat dried with nerves. Were you invited to the wedding? He knew that you and Naeryin had developed a friendship of sorts since you met a little over a year ago at one of Seventeen's concerts and would meet when Naeryin was in Seoul on those rare times, but neither of you had ever said a word about you attending the wedding. He genuinely did not know if he could handle seeing you surrounded by his family like that, like you were one of them.

Seungkwan had been so caught up in his worries that he hadn't even noticed the door open until the staff stood from where she was perched on the stool and clapped happily. Seungkwan looked up and saw you standing shyly in a silky lilac off-the-shoulder dress that gathered in at your waist highlighting your curvy figure and stopped just above your knees. Seungkwan could see the hint of a tattoo on your right thigh; he didn't even know that you had tattoos and the thought made him kind of lightheaded. Well, more than he already was.

"What do you think?" You asked nervously, fingers fiddling with the straps of your bra on show thanks to the sleeves. "I'd wear a different bra, of course so imagine without the straps." You encouraged, big eyes locked on Seungkwan who was just staring dumbly at you and wishing he hadn't removed his mask and hat because now his awestruck expression was embarrassingly in full view.

"You look so beautiful!" The staff enthused when Seungkwan remained silent. You smiled gratefully and turned your attention to the staff who approached to coo over how well the dress suited you and literally looked tailored to your body despite being off the rack. "You two are going to look so beautiful together, have you seen your boyfriend's suit? He looks so handsome in it!"

"Uhm, he's not my boyfriend." You corrected softly, cheeks a little pink and gaze suddenly focused down on the skirt as you fiddled with it. "Friends."

"Oh, I apologise, I just thought because his sister personally set aside options for you to attend her wedding and asked for silk like her brother's shirt…I assumed. I'm sorry."

"It's fine." You assured, placing a gentle hand on the staff's arm comfortingly. "I'll go change back. I'm more than happy with this dress so I won't try the others." Then you were back in the dressing room, the door clicking to a lock behind you and Seungkwan still hadn't moved a muscle.

It took until you were at your usual coffee shop, at your usual table at the back half hidden behind a divider and plants, that Seungkwan managed to actually say a word.

"You're coming to the wedding?" He asked, fingers playing with the edge of his mug as he stared down at it.

"Mm, the makeup artist that unnie picked turned out to be really uncomfortable to be around when the girls went to trial their looks for the day, and so unnie asked me if I could help them out as they had decided to just do each other's makeup instead of stressing to find a wedding makeup artist in time. Of course, I said yes and then unnie said I should now accept the invite seeing as I'll be there anyway," You shrugged and then sipped at your drink.

"Noona invited you already?" You nodded in confirmation. "And you said no?"

"I wouldn't really know anyone and would feel really out of place and anxious the whole time."

"You'd know me."

"Mm, but you're her man of honour, Kwan-ah, you have duties to attend to so I didn't want to add more on top. I know you'd feel responsible for looking after me and making sure I'm comfortable." He opened his mouth as if to argue but then closed it again making you giggle. You both knew that he would be doing exactly that. "But I have a real purpose for being there now, and I met the girls through video chat and they're lovely so I think I'll be okay and you won't need to worry about me."

"I'll always worry about you." He replied automatically in a gentle tone. You peered up at him and then aside, eyes unintentionally landing on your dress laid over the back of the seat on your right side in a protective black dress bag to keep it clean. Seungkwan followed your gaze automatically and recalled how you had looked in the dress and how he had lost all ability to talk. He felt guilty for not telling you how beautiful you looked. Bravely, he took the chance to now. "I should've said this earlier when you asked but I think you look so beautiful in that dress, noona." You slid your eyes back to him, a little rounder now at the compliment. "I was just…lost for words. I've never seen you like that before."

"Yeah, I was worried it would be weird, wearing a dress in front of you." You admitted, directing your focus to your mug between your hands. "I was supposed to go pick a dress a few days ago but I uh, wanted you to be there."

"Me?"

You nodded. "So the first time you see me in a dress isn't the day of the wedding."

Seungkwan knew that you didn't mean it that way, that you weren't talking about your wedding but he was now thinking about it; what kind of dress you would choose to wear when you promised to be by his side forever and love him until the world stops spinning. Seungkwan had never thought of that before; marrying someone specific, being in love with you and spending your lives together, but now that he had, he realised how much he quite liked the thought. The past months together were supposed to be his way of forming a connection with you that would allow you to see him in a romantic manner like you had started to with Seungcheol last year. But it seemed it had just made Seungkwan's feelings burn brighter and his crush turn into something more.

"Kind of desensitise you, I guess?" You continued, unaware of the fact that Seungkwan had just realised and accepted that he was falling in love with you. "Though I guess once isn't enough to desensitise," You mused, lifting your mug to sip at.

"I guess you're going to have to wear dresses around me a lot in the next few weeks." He replied, surprised at how smoothly he had gotten the words out when the thought of seeing you in dresses so much was genuinely giving his lungs some issue drawing in oxygen.

"Kind of impractical to wear at work." You replied, eyes curving with your smile over the edge of your mug.

"Mm, I guess so." He agreed and took a drink before lowering his mug and licking his lips. "Then the only thing to do is spend more time together outside of work."

"That would mean going home and changing instead of going straight to wherever we want to go. We barely make it before closing to a lot of things as it is, Kwan-ah."

"I don't mind." He shrugged, playing it off and looking back down to where his left index finger was tracing over the edge of his mug. "I don't mind what we do, so long as we're together."

"Oh," You licked your lips and looked down yourself, cheeks a little pink and not noticing that his were the exact same. "Me either. I don't mind either. I just like spending time with you."

Seungkwan looked up and noticed how shy you looked with your blush and downturned eyes. Maybe, just maybe his plan had worked and you were starting to like him too. Bravely, he uncrossed his ankles to stretch his leg out just enough to tap his foot to yours lightly. You peered up at him through your lashes for a few seconds before you moved your own foot to be beside his own. Seungkwan's heart thumped and he had to quickly lift his mug to hide the fond dopey smile that lifted his lips.

The weeks until the wedding passed in a blur of flushed cheeks and shy giggles between you two. You made sure to fit in time together at every chance that you both could, and where possible you always wore a dress. The dresses were all casual and comfortable, ranging from simple pinafores to cute summer dresses; all of which stopped around your knees and never showed any more skin than your arms and the slight glimpse at the top of your chest, but every single one made Seungkwan's heart thrum because it was for him. Not quite in the way he wanted but he still hoped and started to believe as the days passed that you were no longer just desensitising him but dressing to look nice for him. He had noticed that sometimes you wore a little more makeup than usual or did something with your hair; he always complimented you on it and felt pride swell in his chest at the way you'd turn shy and blush without fail before taking his hand to lead him off somewhere different every time. At some point in those weeks, it stopped feeling like two friends hanging out and more, dare he say it, like dates. Something Seungkwan regularly screeched to Hansol about when they were safe from others overhearing. He couldn't help but wonder if you had felt the same too.

Then the day arrived that you two travelled to Jeju together ready for the wedding the next day. Of course, Seungkwan had been basically booked in to stay at his parent's house for the weekend but had said to you when you were trying to figure out your own accommodation that he'd get a room at the hotel too so that you could go together. You had refused saying he should stay with his family otherwise they'd be very disappointed and he would regret not taking the chance while he could. He had understood your point, so had just helped you book a hotel for the trip with something hidden in his chest saying that he wouldn't regret it as much as you thought.

There had actually been a bit of a fuss leaving Seoul as somehow people had found out that Seungkwan would be at the airport, but at least you had known ahead of leaving for the airport so Hybe had put together a team to escort you two through the airport safely with a few of the security getting on the flight too in case it was crazy at the other end. But Jeju airport had been pretty much quiet so the staff had gotten back on the next flight back to Seoul after making sure you two were safely in the car Seungkwan had rented for the trip.

Although Seungkwan could drive, he wasn't all that confident about it and it was even worse with you in the car as he didn't want to look incompetent, especially in his home town. You were always the one driving you two around in Seoul and honestly, Seungkwan preferred it that way because there was something really attractive about the way you drove; as if you had no concerns at all and had been driving your whole life. And you always let him put whatever music he wanted on; Seungkwan was pretty sure that lately you had even started to sing along under your breath and he's anticipating the day he actually hears you sing for the first time. So Seungkwan liked it much better when you drove but he had wanted to drive this time so that you could take in everything you passed without having your mind mostly on safety.

Initially, you two had planned for Seungkwan to drive you straight to the hotel to let you settle in and he'd go to his parent's house, but he had looked at you and saw how bright your eyes were as you took in the beautiful sights that he didn't want to part already. So he drove around showing you various things, pointing out places and telling you his associated memories; things he hadn't even really had the chance or urge to tell his members but he wanted you to know. He wanted you to know everything about him and to know everything about you in return.

"Do you think I could go to your home town with you one day?" He requested when he finally pulled up into the drop-off zone outside the hotel, hours after landing and with a few calls from his family wondering where he was. They hadn't said much after he had said that he was showing you around, but he knew that he was going to be bundled with questions from his mother in particular about when he was going to ask you out. Not because Seungkwan had ever told anyone but Hansol about his feelings for you, but because his family just knew him too well, especially his sisters.

"My home town?" You questioned looking at him with one hand on the door handle ready to get out. He nodded. "No."

His face fell a little. "Oh, okay, sorry, I just thought-"

"Not because of you, Kwan-ah," You assured, reaching over to pick his hand up from where it was still resting on the handbrake. "But because I don't want to go back there myself, let alone show someone who means so much to me that part of my life."

"You don't?" He frowned concernedly. "I didn't know you felt that way."

"Mm, there's a reason I've been in Seoul as long as I have." You squeezed his hand a little then smiled and removed your seat belt.

"Will you tell me about it? One day?"

"Maybe." You agreed and got out. He quickly followed to help you take your case and large makeup case out of the boot. "Go before your parents call again." You teased, trying to wave him off.

"I will." He agreed though stood there, one hand on the car and the other in the pocket of his shorts. "Go in." He encouraged with a closed-lipped smile on his face as he tilted his chin towards the hotel. You didn't react immediately, just looked at him and he was very certain that your gaze travelled him up and down before you did turn and scuttled off into the hotel. "Did she just check me out?" He muttered in stunned disbelief, finally moving to get back into the car. Once inside he just sat there dumbly, one hand pressed to his juddering heart. "I think she checked me out." He laughed in happy disbelief though jumped when there was a horn behind him. He quickly strapped himself in and disengaged the handbrake to drive off and let the taxi behind pull up.

Seungkwan had already seen you for breakfast which all of the wedding party were invited to at the resort where the wedding was to take place. You had tried to say that you weren't part of the party, just a guest doing makeup but Naeryin had not accepted that at all. Especially as Seungkwan would then be at the resort for the rest of the day making sure that everything was ready and you needed to get there early yourself to start on the bridal makeup and get ready too. So Naeryin had pointed out that it just made sense for you to join them all for breakfast so that her poor little brother didn't have to drive so much and add extra stress on his shoulders; a manipulation that you were very aware was happening but too caring of Seungkwan to avoid.

You two had sat side by side at breakfast and Seungkwan had done his utmost to not be obvious with his feelings in front of his family but clearly, he had failed as his sisters especially kept giving him knowing grins every time he met their eyes. He just stopped looking at them in the end.

But then you had to part ways; Seungkwan to do his duties putting his eye for detail to the test in the actual venue and you to go with the bride and her bridesmaids to help her get ready. Watching you walk off laughing with his sisters had made Seungkwan feel kind of giddy. His family loved you and that made him happier than he could put into words.

Seungkwan had just finished spending a good twenty minutes trying to get one particular strand of hair in the right place, wanting to look perfect for his sister's wedding (and also to impress you) when there was a knock on the door of the room designated to him to get ready for the wedding. He had already been in there for over an hour to shower and get into his grey suit with a lilac silk shirt underneath. You had that morning obligingly given him makeup products for him to apply himself, he really wanted to look perfect for Naeryin's wedding. And he had done a pretty good job if he said so himself, not as good as you would've but good enough.

"Kwan-ah?" Your voice passed through the door making him freeze. He was suddenly hit with the very real thought that he was not ready to face you. "Can I come in? I'm done with the girls so I can help you now, if you want it."

"U-uhm, yeah-yeah, you can come in." He called then swallowed thickly when the door started to open.

Seungkwan's hands fell to his sides and he automatically turned around to face you as you walked into the room. He had already seen you in the dress and that was hard enough to deal with but now that you had your hair done, makeup on and feet strapped into a pair of pretty lilac heels, he really did forget to breathe for a few long seconds.

"Oh," You exhaled when you took in Seungkwan as you approached, your beautifully made-up eyes widening a little even as you came to a stop just out of arms reach. With the heels on, you were a few inches taller than him and usually, Seungkwan would hate that but with you, he didn't even care.

"You're the most beautiful person I've ever seen." Seungkwan breathed out, chest heaving as he quickly rushed to refill his suddenly burning lungs. You looked away shyly as a blush bloomed on your skin. With your shoulders and the top of your chest exposed like that, Seungkwan could see for the first time that your chest coloured prettily when you blushed. It was probably not a very good piece of information to have right then if he wished to remain sane enough for the wedding. But, too late.

"You should see Naeryin-unnie, she looks like a princess." You replied and looked back up at him. You stepped forward without thought and easily fixed that annoying strand of hair without any hassle.

"I don't doubt it, my sisters are all beautiful. But I can never put you in the same place as any of them, they're my family and you…" He breathed out, fingers ghosting over your arms where they were both still raised, gently brushing your fingers over his face to smooth out any imperfections in his makeup.

Your hands stilled and you redirected your gaze from his cheek to meet his eyes. "I'm what, Kwan-ah?" You asked quietly, almost a whisper between them.

"You know," His expression tightened and turned a little desperate as his fingers curled around your forearms. "You've got to know by now, Y/N."

"I…I have my suspicions." You admitted and licked your berry-stained lips. "When you kissed me, it-it wasn't just a spur-of-the-moment thing, was it?"

Seungkwan swallowed thickly.

Part of him didn't want this conversation to happen, not today of all days when he wasn't certain where it was headed and he already had so much on his shoulders to make sure that his sister had the wedding of her dreams. But the other part of him wouldn't be able to think of anything else if you didn't talk about it now, if you walked away and left it for another time or never again. His heart was so full in his chest, so full of all the little quirks and habits of you that he couldn't not know for certain anymore. He needed to know if the hope in his chest should get shoved back in the bottom of the box for a future Seungkwan, or if he could let it become something more.

"No," He admitted quietly, fingers curling a little further but still not really applying much pressure. You always treated him so carefully that he couldn't help but do the same back.

"And it was more than just…wanting to kiss me?" He nodded a little. "More as in…you like me?"

Seungkwan inhaled softly before nodding. "Yeah, noona, I like you. I liked you so much then that it just overflowed and I couldn't stop it before I realised what I was doing. And now?" He huffed a little laugh. "I like you so fucking much that I'm constantly scared my heart is going to burst from my chest like those cartoons from when we were kids." You laughed a little at his choice of wording but you didn't look like you were laughing at him. If Seungkwan had to pick a word to describe how you were looking at him, he'd say endeared.

"That much that you're turning into a Looney Toon?" You teased, settling one palm more solidly against his cheek while the other moved to press to his chest and felt the jack rabbiting of his heart against your touch. "Sounds pretty serious, Kwan-ah."

"Y-yeah," He swallowed, not entirely sure where this was going but that hope was flitting around his torso disrupting the butterflies that had laid resting in his stomach. "Can you please tell me if you feel the same way or not because it's driving me crazy not knowing, noona," He whispered pleadingly. You smiled gently at him then leaned in to press your lips to his. Seungkwan's hands tightened around your arms and his eyes closed as he kissed you back with his face warming dramatically. "Y-you do? You like me too?" He asked for clarification purposes when you leaned back and watched his eyes flutter open.

"Yeah, Seungkwan, I like you too." You confirmed then giggled when he surged in to kiss you, not that it really worked when you were giggling and he was smiling brightly.

"Let me take you on a date tomorrow." He requested.

"I can't," You frowned a little, which worsened when you watched his face fall. "I promised to go to the spa with your mum tomorrow."

"What?" He blinked at you dumbly. "The spa? With my mum?" You nodded. "Uh…what?"

"Apparently you've told her a bunch of times that I'm the one who always tells you what skincare products to use so she wanted my opinion for her own skin and then it kind of quickly went from agreeing to go product shopping with her to skipping all that and going to the spa."

"Oh," Slowly, Seungkwan's cheeks lifted as he smiled. "I like that, that you're going to do something with my mum. I'm really happy that you get along with my family."

"Me too. I was nervous but they've been so welcoming to me. Sprinkled with not-so-subtle hints that you should be getting married to start a family of your own." You giggled when he whined and tilted down to hide embarrassedly against your neck. You wound your arms around his neck and played with his hair gently to not ruin the styling. Seungkwan's complaints fell silent, too content being in your arms for the first time to be anything but happy while his arms went around your waist. "You have things to do," You remembered after a minute of just holding each other.

"I want to do this."

"We can do this whenever we want, Kwan-ah, Naeryin-unnie only gets her wedding once. At least I hope so, I hope this is a long happy marriage for her, she deserves it."

"She does." He agreed and straightened up to look at you. "I know-I know it's not quite the same, but you deserve a long, happy relationship too, noona. And I hope I can be the person who gives it to you. If you'll have me?"

"Kwan-ah," You exhaled fondly and couldn't help but kiss him softly.

"Yes? Yes, you'll let me?" He asked, hope thick in his voice.

"Unnie will kill us for getting together on her wedding."

"She wo- okay, she would." He sighed heavily and slumped a little, lips turning pouty. "I've wanted to call you my girlfriend for so long and now I'm stopped again just when I thought it was really going to happen. Because my sister wants all the attention."

"Let her have it." You giggled.

His lips pouted further. "I can't call you my girlfriend now because of my sister and can't take you on a date tomorrow because of my mum, what's even the point of confessing?"

"You're so dramatic, Kwan-ah." You teased, tugging on his ear a little and noticed him trying to fight the twitch of his lips giving away his smile. "I have a good reason for confession regardless of the current holdbacks in being together." He tilted his head a little in question. You smirked then kissed him, mouth moving slowly this time, all lingering and none of the sweetness of earlier. Seungkwan couldn't help but groan slightly, soft and barely audible but still present as he tilted further into the kiss to match the intensity as his fingers curled into your hips.

"Think that kinda makes it worse." He murmured a few minutes later, some of your lipstick on his lips and your own a little smeared. He had the sudden urge to lean back in and make it even worse, ruin your makeup and take you apart. But he didn't, he proved to himself that he had self-control and leaned back.

"So no to doing that again?"

"I didn't say that," He rushed making you laugh. He smiled and pecked your lips before moving back. "You should fix your lipstick, baby." Your eyes widened a little at the petname. "Is-is that too much?" He asked, cheeks flushed and not just from the kiss.

"Hell no," You answered immediately then grabbed his face to kiss again. He couldn't help but kiss you back, hands secure on your waist. "Call me all the petnames you want, sweetheart."

It was Seungkwan who surged back in then, pushing you back against the dresser behind you making you gasp into the kiss. For a split second, Seungkwan wondered if putting his tongue in your mouth was too far but then it was already happening and your fingers were curling into his hair to keep him close.

You both knew that you really should not be making out, especially so heavily right then. Seungkwan really did have duties to attend to in order for the wedding to go ahead properly in a little under an hour. But you both got caught up in each other's mouths until Seungkwan's phone started to ring in his back pocket.

"Fuck, fuck, okay," Seungkwan panted out, reluctantly pulling away. Your lipstick was a complete mess now and he knew that you would need to redo your makeup and no doubt his too. He couldn't help but kiss you again as he pulled out his phone to lift. "You're going to drive me insane, you know?" He chuckled, pushing back with his hand pressed against the dresser at your side.

"Likewise," You replied simply, watching him heavily as he answered the call of his oldest sister asking where he was.

"Getting ready." He spoke into the device, eyes roaming over your body openly now that he could. "Mm, noona's going to do my makeup and hair for me then I'll be there." He hummed again in response to whatever Yerin said then hung up and put his phone back in his pocket. "I want to kiss you again but I know they'll come to drag me off if I'm not there soon."

"Mm, better keep our hands and lips to ourselves then." You pushed off of the dresser and walked over to pick up the makeup wipes from the dressing table where everything was still laid out. "Come on," You encouraged, pointing to the stool with one hand, the other already wiping off your badly smeared lipstick. Seungkwan moved his phone into his inner blazer pocket before obediently sitting down and grabbing a wipe himself to remove the mess on him too. As he worked he wondered if maybe he had a kink for smeared lipstick, because he really hadn't wanted either of you to remove it and could easily imagine you in various lipsticks under him, the colour smeared across your face and down your neck. And he was really fucking into it.

You went into professional mode once the products were in your hands and Seungkwan easily followed suit without consciously doing so. You both had a job to do here regardless of your own feelings and you would both feel endlessly guilty if anything went wrong because of you.

After two years of working with Seventeen, you had Seungkwan's makeup done swiftly then fixed his hair into place before sending him off. He leaned over to press one last kiss to your lips, this one soft and short then he rushed off leaving you grinning to yourself as you cleaned up his room.

In the end, the wedding went off without a hitch even if Naeryin had turned into an anxious mess at the last second and had to be talked down by her entire bridal team while you hovered at the side awkwardly with a little bag of emergency makeup supplies in hand in case Naeryin needed a touch up during the afternoon. Which she did need then, and also after the actual marriage ceremony itself when she cried happily at her new husband's sweet vows.

But after that, you were constantly swept away by various family members wanting to know you because it seemed that all of Seungkwan's family liked to gossip. And despite his sister literally getting married, they were all fascinated by the young woman in attendance who their dear Seungkwanie spent most of his time with in Seoul, both in and out of work. Despite that, you did genuinely enjoy yourself and loved meeting his family and old family friends who were in attendance. The stories of little Seungkwan were also a great joy for you, you just wished there had been pictures too.

Still, a little after sunset while the sky was still tinted orange, you needed a break so you escaped the beautiful hall full of people happily talking and dancing to the loud music, and wandered to the beach just a few minutes away; part of the resort so thankfully hidden from the general public. There were a few resort goers dotted along the beach but none of them paid you any attention as you walked along the sand, heels dangling in your left hand and enjoying the calm.

Seungkwan had noticed a lack of you pretty quickly, always swivelling his head around to make sure that his relatives weren't being too much meaning he'd need to intervene, but you had always been smiling and looking genuinely happy that he left you alone mostly. And when he had seen you holding his baby cousin and dancing with her, smiling brightly as the one-year-old giggled away in your arms, Seungkwan knew he definitely could not approach you then because he just knew he'd kiss you and ask you to forget about his sister and be his already regardless of the group you had been standing with. Something about you with kids had always gotten to him and now seeing you with a kid that shared his blood, well he was really understanding that his subconscious had been trying to tell him that you'd be good with your shared kids.

But when he noticed your presence gone entirely, he grew distracted until the bride herself slapped his arm. "I'm talking to you, asshole."

"Mm, yeah, I know, I'm listening." He replied, not even looking at her.

"No, you're not." Naeryin looked around too and understood. "She's probably gone to the bathroom, relax little bro, Y/N is fine."

"She's not good with all this; people and noise." He replied, frowning a little in open concern. "She always has to take breaks."

"Then she's taking a break. If it's normal, why are you so worried?"

"Because I know where she takes her breaks in Seoul, I don't know where she is right now."

"Wow," The low whistle made Seungkwan look at his sister. He only intended a quick glance but the smirk on her face wouldn't let him look away. "You're really whipped for her, huh?"

"Uhm," Seungkwan eloquently replied, cheeks pinkening a little.

"For what it's worth, I'm very positive it's mutual."

"I…I know." He admitted, looking down and fiddling with the rolled cuff of his silky shirt, jacket long ago removed thanks to the heat in the hall.

"You know?" He nodded. "As in you left your girlfriend alone the past hours for our overbearing relatives to grill?!" She reached out and hit him again, harder this time making him yell a little in complaint and step away, rubbing his hand over the impact spot on his upper arm.

"She's not my girlfriend."

"What?" She deadpanned. "You confessed to each other and you're not together? You're dumber than I thought, Seungkwan."

"It's because of you!" He defended poutily. "It happened today and we didn't want to distract from your day by getting together!"

"Are you serious?" He nodded and suddenly was pulled into a hug. "I appreciate it and love you endlessly for thinking of me but you really need to stop putting others first all the time. You've already done so much for me today and for today, Kwanie. You've made me so happy, now go make yourself happy, hm?"

"R-really? I can-I can do that?"

"Yeah, you deserve it. I think you two will be really good together." Naeryin informed as she leaned back and straightened her dress back out from the hug. "Who knows, maybe the next wedding will be you two." She teased.

"Noona," He whined embarassedly. "Don't. She already told me you've all been saying I need to get married and start a family and hinting that she should do it with me."

"Yeah," Naeryin giggled. "Pretty sure mum is already deciding which heirloom to give her first."

"Ugh, stop." He hid in his hands but he was happy, so happy. His mother thinking about heirlooms to pass to you meant she had entirely accepted you as a future member of the family and that really had his chest ballooning with pride and joy.

"Just go find her," Naeryin laughed, pushing her little brother away a little causing him to stumble slightly. "Before my new brother-in-law does. Either way, she'll wind up my sister." She teased. Seungkwan glanced over to the older brother of his new brother-in-law; a genuinely lovely guy with a classically handsome face and tall broad build; he kind of reminded Seungkwan of Mingyu in that way. Seungkwan's face turned down a little with obvious distaste, not at the man but at the thought of him going after you. "Stop glaring like an angry pomeranian and go,"

That time, Seungkwan did go, leaving the hall to step into the much cooler night air. He knew that you loved the beach so he didn't hesitate in heading that way.

It really did not take long for him to spot you crouched down at the water's edge and staring intently at something. Seungkwan approached slowly after removing his shoes and socks, taking his time to admire you in the growing moonlight. "Is it treasure?" He asked softly when he was behind you. You looked over at him and smiled a little before nodding. You then reached into the water to dig around in the wet sand while he just watched. Then you pulled your hand out and sent a finger heart his way with a cheeky grin while he cracked up laughing. You giggled and turned back to look at the little crab which you had been watching scuttle around. "Ah, noona, you're so cute." He cooed when he had calmed and moved to crouch down at your side. "Ah, a crab." He understood upon spotting the little creature.

"It's cute, huh?" You mused and he hummed.

"There's rock pools a little further down," He informed, pointing down the shore a little. You got to your feet quickly, grabbing his hand as you moved to pull him up. He chuckled and obligingly got up so that you could walk along the sand hand in hand. "I just spoke to Naeryin-noona," He informed gently, adjusting his hand in yours so that your fingers could lace together. You squeezed his hand a little and hummed encouragingly. "About us." That made you stop and look at him with raised eyebrows so he too stopped and turned to face you. "She told me to stop putting others first."

"She's got a point, you can be really selfless, Kwan-ah,"

"Mm, I know. I'm trying."

"Good." You smiled gently. "What has that got to do with us though?"

"She told me to be with you now,"

"She did?" He nodded and smiled when yours grew. "Really?"

"Yeah. So, as we have permission, can I call you my girlfriend from now on?"

You rapidly nodded and moved closer. "Yeah, yeah, you can but only if you kiss me right now."

"Deal," He grinned then dropped both his shoes and your hand to take your face into his hands and kiss you. You squealed a little but it turned into a little happy giggle as you kissed him back, your free hand holding onto his waist. "I like you, so much, noona," He informed breathlessly when the passionate kiss ended and he pulled back just enough to look at you with nothing but joy and adoration shining in his eyes. "I want to be with you for a long time. I want to make you happy for a long time."

"I want that too, Kwan-ah," You confirmed. "I want to be by your side for as long as you'll put up with me."

He laughed. "Me put up with you? Baby, you're so ridiculous, you're everything good in the world. It's me who should be saying that, me and my attitude problem. I'll work on it and try to stop side-eyeing everyone all the time."

"No," You pouted a little. "I like the side-eye."

"What?" He muttered bewildered. "You like the side-eye?"

"Yeah, there's something really hot about the way you do it." You admitted, a little embarrassed to admit that but not shying away, especially when his smile slipped into a seductive smirk.

"Yeah? You think I'm hot like that?" He murmured lowly.

"I think you're unfairly attractive all the time, baby, just something about the side-eye makes me want to take you somewhere private and have my way with you." Seungkwan's expression dropped in a split second at the implication of your words. You could see the arousal swirl into his eyes at the very thought. You couldn't help but giggle, which snapped him out of the minor trance.

"You demon," He murmured but you just giggled again and his lips turned back up into a fond smile as he admired the way the starlight reflected in your eyes. At least now, he finally had the confirmation that you truly did look beautiful under the stars.

"Mm, and this is just the start of what it's like to be in a relationship with me. It's too late to back out now though, you're my boyfriend, you're stuck with me for a long time."

"I'm more than okay with that," And well, you know the phrase; truer words had never been spoken.

A/N; I hope you enjoyed this cute lil Seungkwanie story! Don't be shy to let me know what you think <3 Also, I can't be the only one who thinks his side eye is weirdly hot, right? 👀

[quitealotofsodapop]

[The ones who manage to unearth their version of Luzhen clutch the newborn Stone Monkey tight, sobbing at the joy of finding another of their kind.]

That’s those that do have them. Their universes aren’t identical, so there is likely some that don’t have a Luzhen because their moms mate did perish in the flood: like, say, TMKATI-verse.

Mostly because I was looking through the old posts and one way for Luzhen to be born was somebody locking Peach into the furnace, but not turning it on and that counting to start the process. Obvs different rules now, but variety, you know?

That and the rest of the SWKs can quickly learn why Stone Eggs are a last resort kind of deal, with Peach nearly croaking during birth. Like, ‘Damn, there is a way for us to die, even with all these immortalities’, you know?

Also: [Cherry, holding his little bro up like Simba: PEEEEEBBBBBLLLEEEE!!!!!!!]

If none of the modern kids do the Circle of Life, I will be disappointed.

Recall that back then also were going by the thought of Nuwa having a hand in SWKs creation? Well, thought here: she’s responsible for Reborn-Luzhens creation. Don’t know, just had the idea of a small undefined soul causing some havoc near Nuwa – because it wants a family, it was promised a family, why won’t it be getting its family anymore – reminding her of the Havoc and she ends up making a little clay monkey for the soul to inhabit.

Kinda like TMKATI, just less pregnancy and more clay.

Then she drops the little troublemaker off at Smokey’s, “He really wanted to be born” she shrugs and peace’s out.

Smokey, who was doing his best to suppress his grief at the apparent fact that his dad had died in his world, just now has waterfall levels of water coming out of his eyes. His little brother harassed a god to ensure his own birth! Truly, they are related.

[The knowledge that he might be considered divine royalty under Celestial Law would be a bit much for him right now.]

Honest question: what do the rest of the SWKs think about that? Like, that has to knock the wind out them, for sure.

referencing the Wukongverse learning about Stone Matriarch au + our older post about Nuwa and Houtu making Luzhen on accident + Furnace - Fire = Stone Egg.

I should really do an updated TMKATI timeline post once my exams are over. Currently I'm thinking of altering it so that the twin boys of the Nodelets - Jidu and Luohou - are the ones created from one of the parents getting trapped in the Furance without the fire, likely from LBD stealing the Furance/capturing one of them. I'm thinking Luzhen (like possibly Canon!MK) would be created by Nuwa since TMKATI!MK got found by the Shadowpeach parents as a "broken" egg and they accidentally became his parents.

The Stone Matriarch au likely doesn't apply to many of the other universes since it is in of itself an Au. If any of the SWKs find an egg at the bottom of FFM/Mount Huaguo, it's like a million to one chance.

The one that does is super hyped/sad though. Not sure which.

-

I love the idea of Reborn!/Smokey's Luzhen getting created because Nuwa encountered a little chaotic soul wanting to be born + realising that she shoudl probably give him to someone with a similar origins.

And let's just say; what if... Reborn!Luzhen's soul was created as a reincarnation?

The Reincarnation of a *certain* Primordial Demon who has just died? And may need to be raised in tandem with it's Qi Energy counterpart in order to grow into a (mostly) balanced monkey?

>:3

-

As for the method in which: (Stone Monkey + Furnace) - Samadhi Fire (or they waiting too long) = Egg?

Most likely candidate would be Netflix!SWK/Cherry.

Because he's the exception of Monkey Kings who haven't been "furanced" yet.

I'm just imagining the next Wukongverse he pulls up looking SUPER rough.

Starfruit: "Wow, you look like Hell." Cherry, covered in burn scars: "Don't remind me. Ran into some jerks who stole a bunch of alchemy supplies from the immortals." Sugar: "Calabash?" Cherry: "No thanks I'm not hungry. Well anyway this guy working for Heaven thinks I'm too dangerous to be walking around, and he tosses me into this big pot. I run out of air and somebody turns the heat on! For like a month!" All the SWKs who Know: *winces of sympathy* Ace, jokingly nostalgic: "Ah the Trigram Furnace. Usually happens before the Buddha's hand though." Cherry: "Yeah don't remind me. Luckily my new friends got me out and woke me up." Dawn, suddenly pauses: "Wait. Woke you up?" Cherry: "Yeah I sorta passed out just before the worst of the fire started." Dawn, gettign concerned: "And were you asleep for that whole time?" Cherry, getting nervous: "Yeah??" Dawn: (*shares a look with the other monkeys. A bunch nod their heads with nervous expressions*) Cherry: "Why, what's the problem? Did you guys not fall asleep?!" Smokey: "How could we? The flames of Samadhi nearly turned me to ash. Only way me or any of us survived it is because the Wind corner has a higher pressure." Cherry: "There was corners in there?" Dasheng: "You didn't train in alchemy under Subuhti as we did. The Trigram Furnace is made up of eight corners according to the major celestial elements, with each corner having the properties of that element. The Wind element feeds but also suffocates fire, so even True Fire weakens there." Cherry: "Oh. I think I survived cus I just went into a dissociative state and became a statue." Dawn, now convinced: "YOU PETRIFIED!?" Cherry, getting scared: "NOW I AM!?"

Cue the monkeys who know about how Stone Eggs are formed dragging Cherry to see Guanyin. The bodhisattva explains that; yes, Cherry is carrying a mini-him all wrapped in a stone casing, all because the lack of air in the Furnace caused his body to believe that it was time to bud off into a new monkey. Cherry faints. Joyfully.

Cherry, rambling excitedly: "A mini-king! No! A Prince! NO! A PEBBLE! And he'll be *just* like me!" Dawn, stressing: "Aren't you worried that it could kill you!?" Cherry, brushing him off: "Pff! I'm immortal. Can't die. If I was really worried - I'd just grab a few more pills or peaches." Dawn: (*grabs Cherry by the collar of his armor and pulls him closer. eyes glowing red*) Dawn: "I have over twenty times the amount of immortality you have, and I almost f*cking died. The only reason I'm here today is because Guanyin, the goddess of safe birth, was at my side. And because my Macaque would have dragged me back from Diyu if I had. So. Be. Worried." Cherry, nods fearfully: "Y-yes sir."

But the young Monkey King is still super jazzed about his upcoming mini-him. Even if he's now looking up other ways him can become immortal so that he can meet his little pebble and give him the hugs he himself was denied as a baby.

-

Lastly this part might need to be it's own post due to the amount of thoughts I has.

[The knowledge that he might be considered divine royalty under Celestial Law would be a bit much for him right now.] Honest question: what do the rest of the SWKs think about that? Like, that has to knock the wind out them, for sure.

Send in more of your thoughts :3

[wolfsrainrules]

A Quiet Night AU- A DC/ A Quiet Place fusion thought Long Post

Sooooo I was watching A Quiet Place (which I love deeply, it was such a DIFFERENT handle on horror movies, watching that in a theater was a RIDE) and I am neck deep in DC and had t h o u g h t s. Please keep in mind that I have only fandom knowledge of DC and am playing with the death angels (name of the Quiet Place creatures) make up for this au: 

To Start:

AU is an AOB verse, cause I wanted to play with what a situation like this would do to instincts and packs and I need everyone to do the thing we do with comics where we apply “Comic Book Logic” to why these death angels succeed in invading the Earth. Why the metas and supers didn’t get them out, because this verse would be taking place AFTER the world has been invaded, and the creatures have wiped out QUITE a large chunk of Earth’s population.  Read the VERY LONG ramble about this verse under the cut.

We have Alphas Jay and Cass, Omegas Tim and Dick, Damian is unpresented but approaching the time he would present properly, and he’s an Alpha-to-be. Alfred, Steph and Duke are Betas. 

The Death Angels: For those not in the know, they are large, kind of spider-like in movements, VERY fast, and fully armored. The armor stands up to bullets and knives, and explosions can toss them but don’t seem to do damage. They’re entirely blind, have claws and a mouth full of sharp teeth and their hearing is VERY sharp. Their head opens to expose soft insides that work like a super-ear, tracking sound, and that’s really the only vulnerable spot, and they can’t swim. That’s all canon to their verse. I’m playing with them a little, so that the planet they come from is laced so deeply with kryptonite they’ve adapted to sort of work on supers, as in they can’t use their powers on them. I’m upping that armor to be stronger than standard canon, as we do have metas running around and I want them to really only be vulnerable while hunting and exposing the ear to hunt. 

It means to kill them, you have to get close enough to be heard, to be HUNTED. You have to be clever. Usually with some kind of blade, as most other things (especially guns) are too loud, and even if it works it brings the hundreds of death angels in the area, every single one that heard it, your way and then your fucked. On top of all of that- if they close the plates of armor that shield their ‘ear’ bullets don’t penetrate it, and blades skitter off. You have to get to that soft unshielded ear to take them out. The hearing was picked up real quick by the Bats and they tried to use that.

On technicality, very high pitched feedback sounds can fuck with their hearing, and cause them pain, usually making he plates that cover the ear kind of…lock up? And then they stagger around, can’t track people or what’s around them, and the ‘ear’ stays exposed cause the plates of armor are locked in an open position, even if they’re jerking around like animatronics move trying to make the sound make sense and stop hurting.

I’m messing with that cause I want to make this more difficult lol. If you manage to mess with the main method of hearing, the death angels are evolved to slam the armor plating that covers their ‘ear’ closed, block out the sound, and shift to a low clicking-purr sound that vibrates their body and acts as a makeshift sonar type ability over the kind of echolocation they’d been using, reading the vibrations of it through their legs and basically triangulating prey and obstacles around them and it makes them more dangerous because it’s a response to being hurt and they do NOT appreciate it. 

In canon rain/waterfalls can hide you, if you keep the sound level under the sound of the water. I’m going to keep that, saying the rain hitting the ground hard enough can sort of hide people from that sonar too, if you move carefully. Caves are also a good place to hide- provided the death angels don't get inside. Which means the Bat-Cave is a kind of ‘safe’ space, far enough underground they can speak softly, and the equipment inside is safe to run, so long as they are careful with the clock-entrance. 

I babbled to wintersnight (@iphoenixrising) for a good while about this AU (@north-peach doesn’t like horror, she thinks the protags are all stupid and it drives her nuts so she missed this ramble lol)  but Winter followed my logic and encouraged me to actually post this somewhere lol

Leading into the Next Important Thing: 

Cities are death traps. All that confined space and the noise of it? The death angels came in like moths to a flame. Large groups of moving people trying to evacuate? Too much noise. Death angels stampede in and hit the group like a pack of wolves cornering prey. 

Gotham was one city of many that hit hard and fast. The Bats are good at what they do,  but they’re not omniscient no matter what anyone thinks. It was so fast. 

This verse would be covering the AFTER of the invasion of the death angels, AFTER they’ve swarmed the world, after so many have died. This verse would be the ‘post-apocalypse’ survival AFTER. 

Zeta-tubes are technically usable to get them out, and up to the Watchtower, but the sound of them activating is loud enough to pull the death angels, and the tube gets destroyed in their hunt for the sound. This also works in reverse- if you use them to come back down, the creatures will swarm towards whoever arrived, and the tubes still end up getting destroyed.

Coming back to the AOB concept: 

I love how all of what’s happening opens the chance to play with their instincts and protective territorial instincts. The urge to den down in a defensive position. To patrol their chunk of space, keep their pack alive and safe 

To fight. 

They were all scattered when the invasion happened, so they have to work their way back to the cave by foot, cars are too loud, and their grapleguns make enough sound to also be unusable when firing as well as anchoring down. They can’t open the hidden entrances for vehicles, it’s too loud and opens a way straight in, so they have to find other ways in. If they can get into the manor, the clock would be an option, it opens smooth and quiet, but the trade off is risking any sounds inside the cave traveling up the stairs and getting the location found. 

So most of the Bats running around Gotham are going to sneak into the hidden natural entrances into the cave systems and navigate back to the cave. Defenses and redirects are going to be set up to prevent death angels from getting in.

Which leads to my favorite part of this AU:

How this situation combines with AOB instincts in the Bats specifically. 

How clever the Bats are. 

I want to play with that. Wanna address how smart they are, their instincts going absolutely feral-survival-mode wild in this kind of life-or-death situation, with threats actually actively hunting them, zero chance of reasoning with them.

Wanna address the genetic memory of packs before cities were made being drawn out. Wanna look at how packs actually hunt when those instincts are stirred and it’s life-or-death, how the Bats work together. When an Alpha, Omega or Beta is pushed to the brink, pushed to feral, their pack, their territory all threated, all in actual danger by something that can and will hunt them back. I want to see their senses cranked up and used to track death angels down, hunt and kill them.

How terrifying it probably is to go into rut or heat in this kind of situation. Being hazy and vulnerable, instinct driven, unable to focus well, in a situation like this one. How, once the situation has settled correctly into their psyche and bones, it might change. The mess that is a presentation heat or rut in this kind of hell, because Damian is within the age of when it happens (between 13-16 is average in my head, this AU places Damian at 15 in my head, so he’s due for it). What it does to the pack of the person in heat or rut for them to be so vulnerable while something like this is happening.   

The protective pup-instincts triggered by an unpresented Damian. What the urge to shield the pack, keep it alive and safe, and protect pups might look like when combined with the hero-vigilante instincts in them, and finding pups who survived the invasion, but are abandoned or the last of their packs, with no one and nothing left. What the drive to protect and expand their packs, keep them alive and thriving might look like.

The territorial instincts playing out, in a hunted/hunting situation with- as Winter put it- “The backdrop of Gotham and how many traps they'd set since this is their territory and they know every rusty fire escape, crumbling Bailbondsmen, and gargoyle in this entire city.”

She understood where I was going with it lol. I adore how well they’d know Gotham, and exploring how that knowledge would play out in setting up traps and triggerable distractions for the death angels, to help in hunting and killing them. How it’d be fed by those territorial instincts of their city being invaded, their people killed, and their pack in so much danger. 

On top of all of that, I also like exploring how the pack leader (Omega Bruce) vs pack alpha (Jason) would react in a situation like this, and the give-and-take of compromise and keeping their pack safe in such a situation.

I imagine, when all this starts happening, the Bats are collectively scattered all over Gotham. When it happens, they try fighting first, but the creatures are fast and deadly. They figure out sound being what they use to track quickly, that they need to be quiet, and they’re trying to save who they can but… in a city, always moving, always going, full of crime and all the screams with only so few Bats and everywhere ELSE having the same issues at the same time?

They get forced to retreat and fallback. None of them are sure where the others are, who’s in active danger, they can’t talk to each other over comms, can’t make any sound too loud.

They just have to be dead quiet and make their way to the cave on foot, make jumps that they know they can land silently on buildings, watch for the death angels when they move, being so so very careful. Unable to check in and see if their packmates are alive or not. Bonds blocked on the job, to not distract their pack, and having to KEEP them that way, while headed for the cave, to not distract each other coming home. 

Oracle being in the Clocktower- frantically shutting down the clock so it doesn’t ring over the city and bring the creatures to her, shutting down any alarms or alerts that could be too loud from her equipment. Sending the news all over Gotham any way she can, as silent as she can, on how the creatures work, and how the survivors can use that knowledge to STAY alive. 

Being scared as she watches trackers, and prays, terrified any time they’re still too long that they may be hurt or dying. Praying she doesn’t see the trackers start moving a vehicle speeds, cause it means they’re going to get chased down by creatures OR a creature has grabbed them and soon the alerts for vitals will scream at her. 

Dick shows up at her tower to get her out with Damian on his heels, so they can get her to the cave, because a city destroyed by invasion is not really wheelchair accessible, much less getting all the way over to the cave silently while trying to get through the rubble. 

Now for my favorite boy:

Tim. Tim in this AU has lost his pack bonds while on Brucequest. He hasn’t accepted a place back in the pack, hurt and distrustful of if the others mean it, after having been pushed out of the pack in his eyes, rejected and unwanted. 

They’ve been trying to fix that, mending bridges and working hard to prove he not only has a place but is WANTED. Building bridges back out with him. By the time the invasion happens, he’s actually starting to believe them- he’s coming to the manor, interacting, trusting they’ll back him, save him, welcome him.  He’s coming around- but he still hasn’t accepted a pack bond yet. Not again.

Didn’t feel quite ready for it, so he doesn’t have a bond with any of the other Bats. He doesn’t know if they’re alive or dead, can’t sense the bond and know for sure, and they can’t check on HIM like that either. 

The panic of both sides of that equation is REAL. All of them have seen these creatures hunt and kill and destroy. And they don’t know if-

This event, this potential of loss on both sides is what makes Tim realize he is NOT willing to keep going without that bond in place. That he wants to feel them in his head again. He could have died or lost any of them, and never had the chance to be bonded to them as pack again, and-

He can’t do that again. He wants the bonds nestled in his chest, wound around his ribs and heart, thriving and anchored in his head. I may write the scene I have in my head out for Tim coming back to the cave last and just having a breakdown cause everyone is THERE, they’re alive. 

This AU is going to be tagged “Quiet Night AU” on my blog, so keep an eye out for more. 

And if you made it this far into this monster post,  PLEASE feel free to send asks in about this verse, I wanna think about/talk about it and share. My brain is turning over all kinds of snapshots of moments in this verse, and I’d love to hear what yall wanna see from it, what questions or scenes you have in mind. Just address in the Asks that it’s for the Quiet Night AU. Edit: I ended up writing the blurble with Tim making it back to the cave found HERE

[phoenixyfriend]

Making this its own post instead of an ask.

I divide crossovers into categories or types, and here the most basic ones.

Intrusive:

A character from one setting ends up in another, completely unrelated setting. They do not share a universe, do not share a planet, nada. This is "falls through a portal" type of crossover. EXAMPLE: A Witch's Favor, where Wanda Maximoff and Maria Rambeau (Marvel) end up in the Star Wars universe due to an unexplained spell malfunction.

Shared Verse:

The settings could theoretically, in some manner, exist in the same universe without ever intersecting. EXAMPLE: I usually use Naruto for this example, e.g. the Hidden Continent exists in the Pacific but has had minimal influence/interaction with the rest of the setting up to this point because it's magically cut off from the rest of the planet. For Star Wars, this is usually pretty easy by just putting whatever the second canon is as just. A planet in Wild Space. They exist in the same universe! They just haven't found each other yet! A great example is the fic A Star to Steer By, by @norcumii and @dogmatix. A subset of this is fics where one is the distant past of the other, like Muse on This or Red-Eyed Black Widow.

Mixed Verse:

The setting is one that involves both canons influencing each other to a degree, or being in the same verse without being a fusion AU or shared-verse. The settings exist together, both having strong worldbuilding elements of the original, but are not fully themselves and show obvious elements of the other. EXAMPLE: Unfortunately my most recent example is an HP crossover so. Please keep in mind that this is from four years ago, before R*wling outed herself as a massive bigot: Professor Storm.

Fusion:

More or less 1:1 "this character from fandom A would be this character from fandom B" or otherwise "characters from fandom A reimagined in fandom B with none of the original setting." For a long time, HP was the biggest and most constant example, but uhhh that's clearly been falling out of favor like raw eggs. I've seen a lot of good ones for Hunger Games, though, and even wrote my own, but I know some other common ones are Steven Universe (which gem are they?), AtLA (which bender type are they?), or Pokemon (what trainer type are they). Also, arguably, generic AUs that don't take place in canon-verse, like modern or historical or zombie or Generic Cyberdystopia. EXAMPLE: After Me Comes the Flood.

Element Overlay:

A world-building element from Fandom B is applied to the setting and characters of Fandom A. Common examples are Daemon AUs or Sentinel/Guide AUs. I think a fun thing to point out is that, while they don't technically have a source fandom of origin since they were developed communally by fandom, soulmate AUs and omegaverse count as well.

There are other types, like infusing the plot of one narrative into the setting and characters of the other, which is a really fun kind of fusion (I always come back to thinking about Age of Marvels by justplainrii, which only ever got three chapters but still eats at my brain sometimes), buuuuut I'd say most crossovers are some variant of the above.

[lemonhemlock]

how do you think helaena's arc will play out in the show? i don't see how she'll get the same ending as the book one, unless that theory about jaehaera getting maelor's storyline turns out to be true

so, this is going to be a bit of a contradiction from the helaena discourse i've seen

i think it's time we nuanced the discussion around her a little bit. yes, she is a nice person and quite jolly, too, in the books, and everyone likes her, but she IS a dragon-rider at the end of the day. so can you truly, truly be an innocent little flower when you're partaking in and perpetuating this practice?

it's no secret that i don't think so. i have written essays already explaining why i think that, essentially, accessing dragon power cannot be done without compromising part of your soul and humanity. in order to gain supernatural powers, they made human sacrifices in old valyria and practiced incest. the targaryens ditched the human sacrifices but retained incest as a practice. dragon-riding is NOT implied in asoiaf-verse to be a "good" thing.

certainly, you can argue that helaena was married against her will to her brother and she doesn't know anything else, but no one made her claim a dragon and, even IF she only did it out of social inertia, because that's what was expected of her as a targaryen princess, i don't believe you can forge a bond with a dragon and remain unchanged and unblemished as a person. and this is ultimately what fans nearly always shy away from when discussing characters like helaena and nettles, because they don't want to see their beloveds tinged with any kind of darkness at all. and i just don't think that tracks with the way asoiaf is written.

it's also no secret that helaena doesn't really have much of an arc in Fire & Blood and that that's one of the weak points of the book. she is there to fulfil the theme of the gruesome cost of war. after jaehaerys dies, she is essentially excluded from the narrative (and probably taken out of commission bc grrm has to explain away why the greens can't use dreamfyre)

and now i see there is some pushback against the idea that helaena should join the war effort because it's not feminist™ to girlbossify every character and that's just not her personality. again, i kind of agree and kind of don't. no, helaena is not a warrior lagertha-type and it wouldn't make sense to turn her into one with one more episode to go. but she IS a dragon-rider, we know that, it's book canon, too. the writers just never bothered to show her interact with dreamfyre because they are incapable of caring about anyone else other than daemon. so, in this case, seeing her on a dragon might be sudden and certainly a shock, but she DOES have that ability and she CAN and HAS flown.

i haven't seen the scene, but this particular suggestion of aemond's - i don't think it's that outrageous. yes, she perhaps would be reticent to join in battle, but she CAN at least do reconnaissance flights like baela does with moondancer, come on. they decided against having her catatonic with grief after b&c, but they're not even going to show her flying on her dragon? like that's somehow too much. that's where we draw the line. what what the entire point then? she has nothing to do. as of now, with one single episode to go, she has no arc and nearly no opinion on anything. her conversational input is about the same a talking to Siri or Alexa. she's barely even a character (and this is not to hate on helaena, but that is how they are writing her)

[rottingaches]

hello everyone ! my name is hyune or phobia, i'm 21+ and use he／they pronouns. i'm currently looking for long—term one on one roleplays with people 18 and older, preferably on discord, or roleplay groups to join ˎˊ-.

⊹ i write in a descriptive, 3rd person point of view, normally ranging from three to five paragraphs. if you have a different writing style, shorter or longer, i'll match ! i tend to use a lot of prose and flowery language, as well as visual changes in my writing — including using capital words or fonts for emphasis. if you would prefer i don't do this, feel free to let me know and i'll leave it out !

⊹ generally, i prefer plots where romance is not the driving factor. i will often include it as a subplot, or something that furthers the main point, but romance—centered stories are not for me ! that being said, if there is a romance plot that you're very interested in, feel free to offer it and we can see if it's something that can be worked with. i absolutely love soulmate plots where neither of them are expecting it, or the soulmatism is the cause of sooo much pain and anguish.

⊹ i love angst. i love it. i live it and breathe it and i will injure and maim and maul my characters for fun! sorry about this! i like hurting them! fluff is so rare!! what is a happy ending without pain so they can appreciate it! etcetera. i'm sorry!!

⊹ plot—wise, once more, i tend to work with darker plots. many of my writings include death, light gore, religious imagery and blasphemy, drugs and illegal substances, and more generally mature themes. while i may reference suicide or self—harm, it will not be actively written. that aside, i will not write r*pe, ab*se, in*est, p*dophilia or any of the above topics including a minor. i also do not tolerate racism, and prefer not to write any kind of sexism. homophobia is a theme that many of my characters will have in their backstory, but not one i'm willing to include in current roleplay events other than as a reference to the past.

* as a note : any action by my characters that is illegal or generally seen as wrong is not one that is endorsed by me. these are actions taken by fictional characters in a piece of writing that stays between me and another writer or group of writers, and are not identifiers of a lifestyle that i believe others should attempt to emulate.

⊹ i will write smut if it furthers the plot or if we are close only. please do not request it; i will not write it as a focal point. any smut or sexual mentions in my writing are based purely on built chemistry and generally, will shape the plot: i do not believe that casual sex will not change a relationship. if that is a plot point for us, then by all means ! — i do not have any issue with discussing sexual themes in writing, and do believe in a sex—positive environment.

⊹ i prefer queer pairings. my characters' gender identity and sexuality often play a crucial part of their journey and even if it's not active in the roleplay, it is important to me and i will be talking about it ! most, if not all, of my experience lies with mlm ／ nb pairings, but i'd like to reach into wlw pairings and writing to better myself. ˎˊ-

⊹ most of my characters have an irl idol or celebrity faceclaim. i do not do real—person roleplay, though i may reuse names, but my characters are not their faceclaims. i use them because they inspire me and are fitting. all my ocs are close to or older than their fc. most of my faceclaims are k—pop idols. if this bothers you, do not bother with interacting! i have a few that are not, but i tend to have very low muse for them.

⊹ i prefer oc and fandomless writing. that being said, i do have ocs and canon characters that i've written in the genshin impact verse and bungo stray dogs universe. i'm very open to writing these, it's just not something i've done as often ! i'm also willing to dip my toes into honkai impact 3rd, saw, hannibal, or something with a plot similar to inuyasha, neon genesis evangelion, stardew valley, legends of zelda, reanimator, and a lot more !

⊹ i've been roleplaying and writing for over eight years, on multiple different platforms from wattpad to tumblr to twitter, discord, and mewe. generally, i prefer plotting before deciding on characters as it allows me to be sure the characters will be ones that will help rather than hinder the plot and leave us at a standstill !

⊹ i am a student, so i may not respond immediately but will always try to get back to you in a day or two max ! feel free to poke at me occasionally and leave messages, i'll respond once i can.

⊹ send me a dm or interact with this post if you're interested in plotting! when you reach out, i'd appreciate it if you'd introduce yourself and let me know what you're looking for. i return the energy i receive ! i love talking ooc and would love to make friends, whether we rp or not. ˎˊ-

divider. rts appreciated!

[the1stokiro]

The Truth about Hobie Brown

I'm definitely thinking about this more than the writers of the Spider-Verse films are, but maybe I'll give them inspiration

In the comics, the Gwen Stacy of Spider-Punk's universe was someone he looked up to...someone who was murdered.

The Captain Stacy of Hobie's universe was also murdered.

"Canon events" as Miguel calls them.

And just like many other Spider-Man who had canon events like losing Captain Stacy and Gwen Stacy dying, Hobie also quit being Spider-Man at one point.

Interesting to note that the Spider-Man costume Verse Hobie threw out resembles his comic counterpart's outfit. (Neat easter egg)

What if when Hobie learned that all the tragedies that happened were some alleged cosmic pre destined event...a canon event. What if he decided he would break the canon?

What if that was the reason why he stayed with the Spider Society for who knows how long. There's an interesting, particular type of chaos that follows Hobie around. A transparent desire for chaos against the system, yet a kindness for those who suffer under it.

He is a punk after all.

What if meeting Gwen Stacy is how and when Hobie finds his way to break the canon. To prove that the canon is bull shit. That we make our own fate.

Hobie treats Gwen like an older brother does. Likely because he's a few years older than her already and the Gwen Stacy of his universe was likely older than Gwen as well.

In a way, saving her, and indirectly saving her father, could be a personal redemption of sorts.

This personal quest for redemption could also be where Miles works into all this.

By the time of the film, Hobie already knows who Miles is. Knows from Miguel what he is. Knows from Gwen what she is to her. It's why he spends his time trying to prep Miles mentally that the spider society isn't what he thinks it is. Why he looks out for him as he does Gwen, even though he's only just met the kid.

Though Hobie's instant fondness for Miles could also be contributed to Miles saving Pavitr from his canon events. Events that would have broken the youngest Spider-Man. That was probably all the proof Hobie needed to know to see that Miles was just as amazing as Gwen likely told him endlessly.

So when Hobie shows Miles how to escape, when he quits and leaves Gwen her own watch. It's already pre set to Miles universe. Who even knows WHEN Hobie brought the watch to Gwen's universe, but it at least would have been at a time when he could've spoken to Gwen's dad enough.

Punks and cops don't usually get along. So that just shows even more how Hobie is willing to work and talk with anyone if it means helping out his plan.

And Hobie's plan isn't even that complex. His plan is to keep the Spider-Teens safe. To make sure they don't have to experience the pain and loss he's had to endure as Spider-Man.

Miles and Gwen have already lost people in their lives, but if they can keep some happiness - maybe even find more happiness with each other...I think that'd be enough for Hobie. It'd prove that being a Spider-Person doesn't always have to be a sacrifice.

[dopscratch]

mugshot meme with the trio :) i love fishlegs which reminds me....

INCOMING BOOKS-MOVIES RAMBLE- even if you only know the movies please stick around, i cant make you but maybe you'll find the rest of this interesting

SO, so so so. i love the movies (well the first two...) but i will never forget their transgressions on the original plot

they took away hiccups Heroic Hair why would you do that he's nothing without his Heroic Hair

they swapped hiccup and fishlegs's personalities why would you do that why would you take away my nerd protagonist my nerd self is weeping

hiccup and fishlegs are no longer best friends why why would you do that to me i live for their loser friendship its just like me

they took away camacazi and made a mid love interest i dont care what you say astrid is mid tier never liked her much apologies i also dont like love interests so take my opinons with a grain of salt

in the movies toothless is actually Super Cool and hiccup also becomes Super Cool and earns massive respect and is not a laughingstock ever since the very first movie which hurt his appeal to me in the movies since, believe it or not, i am a Loser and hiccup also being a Loser and Becoming A Hero The Hard Way was very compelling to me

hiccup is the Absolute Main Character in the movies and the supporting characters don't get much spotlight while in the books it's a pretty well balanced group which i like

snotlout is no longer hiccups cousin and is just comic relief which is a HUGE missed opportunity for drama and depth that i loved in the books

villains in general are sort of mid tier throughout (except viggo viggo was cool. also i love dagur he's the best)

WHERE'S ALVIN

dragons are no longer complex. i loved their society of sorts and their unique morals (generally selfish, cruel creatures who have full knowledge of their actions and just don't care- though have the capacity for kindness) and their whole language and the fact hiccup knew that language because he is a Nerd

HICCUP'S LANGUAGES!! GUYS WHO ONLY WATCHED THE MOVIES, DID YOU KNOW HICCUP IS FLUENT IN AT LEAST 4 LANGUAGES?? HE KNOWS NORSE, DRAGONESE, FRENCH, AND LATIN!! WELL YOU DO NOW

HOOOOLY CRAP the story is SO much darker i'll avoid huge spoilers but let's just say. war. slavery. torture. death. surprisingly generous amounts of blood.

more main-line content- technically yes the shows and other companion materials count for the movie-verse but some things are questionably canon and all that. meanwhile you have 12 whole books that are irrefutably canon and are incredibly well-connected especially through the end.

thats everything that my brain feels like spitting out now. there's obviously more (ESPECIALLY in regards to my uh... opinions about the third movie) but im too lazy to do anything about it at the moment

overall all two movies and the shows are still good and i cherish them so my smack talking is pretty lighthearted. still love the books more though

[oscconfessions]

do all the mods confessiony-sonas have different personalities/lore/other stuff? the designs are all really cool and I wanna know more about them :3

Paradox/Posy (or Catalog when they were alive) is from The Nightly Manor! They were alive before sketchpad's appearance and actually died bc of his arrival.

Paradox was your standard librarian, but they also were an mad/evil scientist on the side. Think Doofenshmirtz, comically bad at being evil. Literally no one knew about the deeds they wanted to accomplish.

I'm not sure about the other confessionysonas' lore, but! Thats mine at least.

-🗄️

Boom was a stick of dynamite from the TTR-verse who exploded and perma-died after TARDIS uh.. well, disabled all recovery centers. They were always called Boom, but after death immediately took the chance to change their appearance to what they are now (the explosion, rather than the dynamite, with goatlike features)!

They mostly wanted to change their appearance so people wouldn't figure out what universe they were from, or have no association with it. They have absolutely no love for TARDIS, and has no idea if they're Plot-relevant or even able to be found that way, but they do NOT want to risk it in any way.

They also don't want to get recovered anymore- they kind of like being a ghost!

When they were alive though they were mostly just a normal guy who was a fan of Twisted Turns and tried to get into the reboot once lmao.

-💥 cog comes from a world of what you would call a "dystopian super-technological future", and is one of the lead developers and lead AI/machine learning engineers. long story short AI, robots and what have you took over and killed off most of the universe, the first victim being the object who gave them life! with practically no one left on their universe, there is nobody to recover them, so... yeah, they're just a ghost now. fun fact, the inside of my confessiony-sona is actually cogs office, where they were killed :D - ⚙️

oh i'm a bit late... well! olive(r) is from the ii universe. this is stolen directly from my normal objectsona/selfship lore (democracy decided olipad is canon so i dont feel bad) lol. he is not mephone generated btw! i actually had to do a bit of rewriting because of ii 16 and decided that the rest of the production crew he worked with was generated but him? he simply got a bit lost. and well, long story i've barely written short, he Died. Badly.

now he spends his afterlife doing stereotypical ghost shit, you know standing at the end of hallways and whispering in earshot of the living. just freaking people out. he finds it hilarious.

he wants to go back, but he's accepted that he's just a ghost now. So he's trying to help out confessiony and comicy with this whole "oscc" thing.

-🫒