#along with different playlists I have been using for writing
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aeristudios ¡ 5 months ago
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currently working on dark academia/paleontologist Jun, lover boy Mingyu and a V-day fic for Vernon... call me a glutton for punishment lol
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hugheshischier4313 ¡ 2 months ago
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YOU MISS HIM DON'T YOU | Q. HUGHES
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𝗣𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 | Quinn Hughes x fem!reader 
𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 | Emotional cheating (not on Quinn),  angst, fluff, oblivious!reader and Quinn, soft!Quinn, neighbors-to-lovers, reader x OC (Andrew, reader's boyfriend), alcohol, flirting. 
𝗦𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 | Months into your friendship with Quinn the two of you finally admit to what's been there all along. 
 🎧 Playlist | 📷 Pinterest Board
Based on a scene in Season 3 of Desperate Housewives (No spoilers in the writing. Bolded words are quoted from the show): “Don't tell me nothing happened. We’ve been fighting over this all week. You miss him, don't you?”
𝗪/𝗖 | 6.8K
𝗔/𝗡 | hi lovelies, thank you for being patient with me for the full fic of this idea. The lines indicate time jumps, they jump back and forth to different scenarios of reader and Quinn through the time they have spent together. I absolutely love these two and this idea and I couldn't find a perfect ending. I rewrote multiple endings and ultimately decided to just make a part two when I finally figure it out. Hope you enjoy, love ya!
It had been a wonderful night, the wine glass in your hand still full, the bottle sitting on the coffee table. The random episode of Bob's Burgers in the background forgotten, adding nothing more than a soft glow to the room. As you sat there listening to Quinn talk about his summer back in Michigan, you found yourself examining him. The way his eyes roam the room as he speaks, the smiles before he lets out a laugh and the way his hands run through his hair occasionally.
"You should have visited, even for just a weekend. You would have thought this was way more entertaining if you were there." Quinn teased as he finished his story. You pushed down the feeling of guilt as you smiled back at him, poking a finger into his shoulder. "I wouldn't have let you live it down if I had been there. So it's probably for the best," You teased back, but the truth was you had wanted to visit Quinn over the off-season, but when the time came, life had another plan.
_________________________________
"You should come down for the week. The sunrise and sunset alone would make the trip worth it. Imagine spending your week off by the lake, a beautiful sky for you to take pictures of. I can send you a ticket, just say the word." As the smile crept onto your face, so did the slightest tinge of pink. You had been putting away groceries when your AirPods had read the message out loud. Quinn had a habit of making fun of your love for the sky. Always calling you out, shrieking, 'The sky is so pretty' like you had repeatedly done (in a terrible attempt to match your voice). You swear you could hear it through the text despite him being over 2,000 miles apart. 
When Andrew's call came through, you found your phone and typed the text about sending it. "Y/N! I got it, I got the promotion!" His voice came booming out, and the excitement was evident in his voice. "Congratulations, Andrew!" you reciprocated his excitement. "And what better time than before you have a week off. I was thinking of going away for the week, maybe Banff? I'll rent us the cabin we had when we went last time." He kept ranting, too excited to keep anything in, but his voice was drowned out by the thought of Quinn. 
"I have to go, but I'll send you the flight information later tonight. I can't wait to see you." Andrews's voice didn't falter, almost like he was on autopilot, just rambling what he knew to say. They exchanged their quick goodbyes before he hung up. 
As if to taunt you, the next sound into your ear was' NEW MESSAGE FROM QUINN 'Or even just for the weekend if you have other plans for your week off.' As you looked back down at the phone and saw the unset message,  'A whole week of sunset pictures? Count me in Q'; the thought of deleting it weighed heavily on you. 
The truth was you had truly missed Quinn this summer. You had moved to Vancouver for grad school in the fall, and as luck would have it, Quinn lived in the apartment next to you. In the past 10 months, you had known each other; the only time you hadn't seen each other was when he had away games. And even then, when he returned, he made it up to you by devoting time to be with you. He bought you a postcard from all the cities he played in, and you had them displayed on your fridge. He signed all of them after the few glasses of wine you shared after one of his longer roadies.
You had (in your tipsy state) jokingly told him to sign one so you could sell them if he ever decided to be a jerk to you. And as he did, you knew you could never sell them; they meant too much to you. He had made a joke about writing nonsense on them to lower the value if you tried. Over the off-season, you found yourself religiously turning them over to look at his little notes, his penmanship holding inside jokes that you held dear to your heart.
As you stood there staring at the postcards on your fridge, thinking of the brunette, you couldn't help but feel the guilt in your chest. The nagging thought that your friendship with Quinn may not be as platonic as the two of you acted.
Why were you standing there thinking of another man when you were just on the phone with your boyfriend? You hadn't and would never cheat on Andrew, but the world seemed to disappear when you were with Quinn. Time slipped by faster, and you longed to sit on a couch with him again.
And at that moment, it had become apparent that you no longer had a choice; you had to choose between the two men, Andrew or Quinn? But then again, it wasn't really a choice between the men; it was a choice between right and wrong.
'Sorry Quinn, I can't this week. Take lots of pictures for me. Can't wait to see them when you're back.' Send. It was vague, and you knew he could send them to you whenever, but you also knew that, at least for this week, he couldn't be your primary focus. You needed to focus on your partner and his accomplishments.
_________________________________
As you had sat in a surprisingly unpopulated section of the airport for a Friday night, you haphazardly skipped through Instagram stories until you were faced with Quinn's private story of him on the boat with his friends. You had no reason, or right, to be this upset, but as you looked at the sunset on the picture's horizon, you couldn't stop yourself from hitting the call button. 
The phone barely rang once before you heard his voice, and you let out a breath you didn't realize you were holding. "Hey, I was j-" His voice was laced with exhaustion as if whatever physical activity he was doing was still fresh. And you found yourself more clam than you had been in days. Oh, how you had missed his voice.
"Are you upset with me?" The words were rushed and tumbled out before you could comprehend the repercussions. You knew that now was not the time to be having this discussion. You were sitting in the corner seats at the airport, waiting for your plane to begin boarding. But it had been two days since that last message you sent, and you had heard nothing from Quinn.
You had been a little hurt when you spent all of Thursday waiting for a response from the brunette. He had never taken more than a few hours to respond to you, which is why you had given him the benefit of the doubt that Wednesday night after you sent the last message. But now that you had spent the entirety of your workday contemplating writing a new message, you were upset, and the Insta story had only added fuel to the fire.  
"No, of course not. Why?" His voice was genuine and calm, a nice contrast to the loud background on both sides of the phone. You figured he was still on the boat with his friends. "Oh, I just figured you were upset since I haven't heard from you." You felt stupid for calling and continuing to talk despite it being obvious he wasn't alone. "But I'll let you go; sorry for calling." you hit the red button before you had time to overthink. Your voice had become weak, and you hated that you were taking time away from him and the time he had to spend with his friends and family.
You had the overwhelming feeling to cry, but you didn't know if it was because of guilt for Andrew or Quinn or because any doubts you had that Quinn was mad at you had disappeared. NEW MESSAGE FROM QUINN: 'Give me 10 minutes, I'll call you back'. The message held an inevitable dominance over it; there was no question that it was a conversation that had to happen, and it had to happen now. 
_________________________________
Quinn had known about your boyfriend from the very beginning. He had seen you together, bringing boxes to the apartment beside his, and noticed you immediately. He wished he could say it had all been innocent, but the first thing he saw was how your legs looked in the tennis skirt you had been wearing. You bent down to pick up a fallen pillow as he exited his car in the parking garage. His eyes lingered on you, and he forced himself to turn away before you noticed. He swore he would offer to help you before he met eyes with Andrew as he stepped out of the parking garage elevator.
"I didn't mean to; it just happened. You were bent over, in a skirt, right outside my car; it was hard to look away when I didn't expect you to be there." Quinn had a slight pink tone to his features right now, and you were smiling, trying to suppress a laugh. You stood in the kitchen, pouring the margaritas into your cups.
"You mean the skirt I'm wearing right now? Is that why you mentioned it? Quinn, you could have kept that secret forever. I mean, you couldn't waterboard that information out of me." You were always more giggly when drinking, which was contagious to Quinn. "But since you didn't, I'm gonna use this against you for the foreseeable future."  The laugh left you when you got back to Quinn's couch. "I'll try not to make any sudden movements that may catch you off guard," you teased as you stood before him and handed him his drink.
"It's not funny; I've felt bad about this for months." he tried to be serious, but the smile never left his face. As you nodded with a smirk on your lip, you turned from him after he grabbed the glass, "Y/N, I'm serious." He wasn't; he could never stay upset with you, even in a joking manner. 
"I guess I'll just go back to my apartment then; I don't want to bring back any of your past shame." your body once again turned towards him as you leaned down over to hug him, "Bye, Hughes, I'll make sure to only wear this when you're out of town." He let out a sarcastic 'ha.' "You don't have to leave; I can control myself. I promise." he rolled his eyes and slowly got up to stop you.
"I don't know; I think the only logical answer is to wear your Drew sweats." You had pivoted and ran to his room before he could reply. You had bugged him countless times to try them on over the past months; you had just wanted to see if they were worth the hype because the black sweats had been sold out forever (and maybe, subconsciously, because of your past love for Justin Bieber). And every time he said no, you took this as your opportunity to try them and bug him simultaneously.
Being in Quinn's room was familiar to you. You had spent most days at one of the two apartments, and sometimes that meant laying in his bed watching TV after he had just returned from a string of away games or after a challenging game or practice. You had worn his clothes before, too; it was always in a platonic way, the first time you had locked yourself out after being out on a run when it started raining. You lost your key on the run, and the concierge was gone for the night. You had also spent the night; he let you sleep in his bed and took the couch. 
As you ran into the room, you closed the door behind you and walked into the closet, closing that door, too. You had found the sweats and slowly walked out of the closet. There was no sight of Quinn, and the bedroom door was still closed. You walked towards the door, sweats in your hand, as you called out to him, "Q? Are you -" But you were cut off as he tackled you onto the bed next to you.
The two of you lay on the bed laughing before turning to face each other. The laughter died down, and you were smiling and looking at each other. The two of you lay there for a while, not saying anything until you broke the silence, "Your eyes are a different color every time I see you, but today I can see every shade in them." You don't know why you needed to share your observation with him, but it felt right. "You cut your hair." He reached out to tuck a strand behind your ear and play with the end of another. His voice had been so him, soft yet dominant. It was true; you had gotten a slight trim the day before and a few longer layers at the bottom of your hair, a small and simple detail that could have been missed. In fact, he was the only person to notice; none of your classmates or even Andrew, although over Facetime, had noticed. 
The room felt heavy as you looked from his hand in your hair to his eyes again, stopping to look at his lips for a second. And when you reached his gaze, it was unreadable. "I -" A phone began to ring as Quinn was about to speak. You could see a shift in his demeanour as you continued to look at him. He got up to find the cause of the sound. "It's your phone." He walked it over to you before heading out to the living room again. The phone illuminated ANDREW CALLING.
You looked towards the empty doorway as you brought the phone up to your ear. "Hey you," your playful voice sounded forced, and the smile on your lips was even more so. "Hey, I have a surprise for you. The notification said it was in the lobby." This shocked you, not only because it was a surprise but because Andrew was never one for small gestures. It was always something big like him ordering 4 dozen roses to your desk after your fourth date. But he had never just sent you or given you something randomly.
Andrew could be a sweet guy; you worked together before he asked you to have dinner with him. You knew you were moving and had no intention of starting anything serious before moving to Vancouver, but he had been so persistent, and it felt nice to have a distraction with all the craziness of moving. But living in different provinces has brought no comfort to either of you. It felt like pen pals most of the time. You would call him a few times a week and talk for an hour before he had to go. There had been a few times where you could have sworn you heard someone else there, but the times you mentioned it, it felt like the fight had been more trouble than the issue itself.
And maybe subconsciously, you felt like a hypocrite. Your relationship with Quinn was platonic, but the number of times you were confused as a couple in public could be seen another way. In fact, you hated to admit it, but it felt like you communicated more with Quinn when he was away than with your boyfriend. 
"There's something for me in the lobby of my apartment complex? Andrew, what did you do? It's 7pm?" As you started talking, Quinn walked into view, bringing your drinks and extending to you. "It's a surprise; you should go get it now; I'm assuming it's just on the concierge desk based on the picture." You stared up at Quinn as you listened to Andrew, "Okay, I'll be down in a minute, and I'll call you back once I have it." The phone call was quickly over. 
"What did you order?" Quinn asked with a smile, used to all the packages you've received. A few that had been too heavy for you to carry on your own that Quinn had taken himself. Even when they hadn't been too heavy, he would carry them for you if he was there. "I'm not sure, Andrew sent it to me." You could have sworn there was a look on his face that was gone as quickly as it appeared. "You want me to go with you in case you need help?" there was no hesitation in your quick reply of 'yes.'
As the two of you walked down the hall, you were overly aware of the distance between you. It was no different than it had been in the past, but there was a particular charge. The words shared and unshared in the bedroom hung heavy. "So I never got to even put the sweats on," you joked while waiting in front of the elevator. "You can borrow them when we get back up if you want," his answer made your breath hitch. He had never let you try them on, much less borrow them.
He looked at you, letting you walk into the elevator first. The ride down was quick and quiet, but how you looked at each other made everything race faster. Your heartbeat quickened as you saw his slight deviation towards your lips before making their way back up. "Quinn," your voice came out as a low plea; whether it was to continue or to stop was uncertain. He stepped closer to you as the two of you stood in silence for a brief moment before the doors opened. As you stepped out, your heart felt heavy.
As you made your way towards the front desk, you saw the back of a man at the desk, but when you heard the voice,  it made you freeze. Andrew he was in your lobby waiting for you, Quinn failed to notice your pause and ran into you. However, before you could tip forward, Quinn had steadied you with a hand on your arm and waist. Andrew called out when he turned around. 
"Andrew! What are you doing here?" You didn't miss the look he gave the sight of the two of you or how his gaze only lingered on Quinn's hand on your waist as he walked closer. You unhooked yourself from Quinn to hug Andrew. The hug was stiff; he held himself higher, and his head hadn't moved from the position it had been in before. You figured he was still looking at Quinn. 
"I wanted to surprise you; we settled a case earlier than expected, so I took a few days off." You had pulled yourself to his side, a view of both him and Quinn. They kept looking towards each other, completely ignoring you. "Well, Andrew, this is my friend I always tell you about, Quinn. He introduced himself the day I moved in, remember? He lives next door to me." Andrew smiled down at you as you continued. "Quinn, you remember Andrew." Quinn looked from you to Andrew before extending his hand. "Good to see you again, man." Andrew hesitated before shaking his hand. 
There was a quick silence before Quinn grabbed his phone from his pocket and looked at the screen, excusing himself, "I have to make a phone call; I'll see you around," but before he could walk off, you gave him a side hug goodbye. You had done it a thousand times before, and feeling like you couldn't because Andrew was there didn't feel like a good sign, so you did it anyway. "I'll text you," you quietly said as you let go.
The next few days had been uneventful, showing Andrew around Vancouver. The hallway had felt unusually empty each time you passed, hoping to run into Quinn. A string of away games was starting that Monday, and when you came back from dropping off Andrew at the airport on Sunday night, you noticed the bag sitting in front of your apartment door. 
The black sweats were inside with a note, 'I'll pick them up when I'm back. Enjoy :). ~ Q" He never asked for them back
_________________________________
"Hey," his voice was clear despite the pixilated quality of his Facetime call. He was wearing a white T-shirt, his hair was wet, and he had a look on his face you had never seen. "Hey Q," your pulse felt overwhelming as if anyone who looked at you could see it throbbing against your neck. "Are you having a good time back home?" It was a buffer; you didn't know what Quinn wanted to say, and judging by the look on his face, you weren't sure you wanted to.
"Andrew called me." His voice was blunt, direct to the point, despite the few seconds he stared at you, hesitating to continue. "He asked if I was sleeping with you." His eyes held yours while the rest of his face had no expression. "What?" The nervous laughter that filled the air around you was nothing more than a way to suppress the hurt and anger of this new confession.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry Quinn. I don't know why he's been so paranoid lately. It seems like he misinterprets everything I mention to him as something else." For the last two months, you had known that Andrew suspected your friendship with Quinn was something more. He had brought it up the last time he was in Vancouver and again over the phone a few weeks ago (although it had been in retaliation to the question you had asked him about the girl with him in a video his friend had posted on their story). 
"Did he misinterpret it, or did he just see what is obvious that you and I can't admit?" The question was loaded with truths that weren't meant to come out. The look that the two of you shared through the screen had only confirmed it. In a split second, months of ignorance had led to a confession when the two of you were thousands of miles apart.
His breathing was heavy; you could hear it through the phone; he had a look on his face that closely resembled his look when his team lost in the Playoffs. It was the look you saw in the mirror this morning when you had not heard from him. It was the split-second look he had in the lobby the day Andrew surprised you.
Everything playing in your head; all the nights he would knock at your apartment after a game with a box of food, the way you would pack him an 'after-game snack' consisting of oranges, a granola bar and a fruit snack (which he teased you about until you mentioned it was like they did in little leagues), the way your breath hitches every time he gets shoved or falls. 
All the times, the two of you had gone for a drive when life felt too heavy, and you shared secrets you had never told anyone before. The way he took off your makeup when you had gone out one night or how he knows your coffee order for every cafe you go to. Quinn and you had been in the in-between since you first hung out. 
"I mean, how long are we going to pretend like nothing is happening?" His voice was calm and demanding, with a hint of subdued anger or annoyance you hadn't picked up. "Quinn, I -" You were at a loss for words; nothing could genuinely capture how Quinn had made you feel. 
You knew you were safe with Quinn around, not only in a physical sense but emotionally. The way he made you feel heard and seen. The two of you were floating in two separate worlds, but the weight that engulfed you was the same. You understood the complication of pressure and leadership; you understood needing to be the most prominent presence in the room, even if you weren't the loudest. You understood the pressure of wanting, no needing, to be the best for everyone else even if it tore you apart. 
It was all those things and more that drove you together, the ability to soothe the ache the buildup of burden had left sacred on the two of you. When you felt a crushing weight on you, the only thing that could alleviate it was being around the man who had quickly become your best friend. Immediately, he knew whether you needed to just sit and cry while he comforted you or go for a drive so you could yell out lyrics or if you needed him to just talk about mundane things.
And you do the same; you knew by the way he left the ice, by the way, he knocked on the door, by the way, he walked down the hallway toward your apartments. You knew when to go over to him so he could catch the recaps, and you knew when to invite him to yours to force him to ignore the criticism. You knew that even after a winning streak or after a goal, he needed comfort, understanding the overwhelming feeling of the slightest reprieve until the next game.
And the honest truth was that you had pushed back any romantic feelings because you knew without a doubt he was your person. You had never been one for friendship with men, and when your friends asked about what you could have in common with a professional hockey player, you never knew what to tell them. Because from every book, movie, series and scenario you knew, as cliche as it was, the only quote that could describe what the two of you shared was, 'Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.' 
"Y/N, please." His voice was barely above a whisper, a plea to say anything. "It doesn't have to change anything. I just need to know; I didn't mean to hurt you; I tried to give you space. I've tried to respect your relationship." He had been ignoring you to avoid hurting your relationship, and in the process, the two of you were the only ones who were hurt. "Quinn." There was only one way you could describe it: "You consume me." Despite the tears that fell, you stared at him through the phone, wishing he was there with you, wishing your plane was going to Michigan. 
"Now boarding flight-" The announcement couldn't have come at a worse time; there was so much to say, and an airport right before boarding was not ideal. "That's my flight." You wiped your tears as you stared at the man on the screen. "Y/N, I'm sorry for bringing this up now; it's not my best moment." he was trying to cheer you up; he wanted you to know that everything would be okay. "Quinn, I don't know what to do," your voice was a quiet plea to understand what was to come.
"Given everything that was said and that we're in two different countries right now, I think we should take some time to digest. I know you're spending time with him, and I don't want you to feel overwhelmed. I think we should take the next week or two." your heart was breaking, but your mind knew that was the best option. And for the first time since the beginning of the conversation, you thought of Andrew, and the slight tinge of annoyance arose again. 
Quinn must have noticed because he was quick to interject his following comment with the most sincere look, "But before you go, I just need you to know that you consume me too." He had his signature half smile as he continued, "You are the most amazing woman I have ever met. I think about you constantly. I think about you when I look at the sky, when I'm practicing with my brothers, when I go out with friends and when I lie in bed. I watch for you in the crowd during warm-ups. You've become one of my favourite people so quickly, and I'm so glad of all the apartments in the city, or even just in the building; you moved into the one next to mine." 
You smiled as the tears fell; if there had ever been any doubt, you now knew for sure that Quinn was your person. "I'll be forever grateful that the universe brought me to you too." And with a quick goodbye and promise to reach out in two weeks, you were in your seat on the plane. 
Your mind racing with thoughts of Quinn and the revelations that had come to light and then again to Andrew. You didn't know why, but your annoyance was morphing into slight anger, the idea that he had called Quinn and accused him of sleeping with you. What annoyed you more was that he had done that and hadn't mentioned it to you. He hadn't mentioned the idea of your friendship with Quinn being something more since that one phone call a little over a month ago. 
You sat with that feeling for the rest of the flight. 
_________________________________
"Okay, fine, you are mad at me! But name one thing that I have done to deserve it!" Andrew was standing on the opposite side of the room. His breathing was heavy as he ran a hand through his hair. "You called Quinn." your voice was laced with a hint of sadness and betrayal. The statement was simple and direct but held a meaning that both of you knew would change everything. 
The argument had started with something so small: the two of you walking on eggshells the past few days and your passive-aggressive comments when he mentioned anything related to Vancouver. Over the past few days, you had tried to get Andrew to admit to calling Quinn; he wasn't stupid; he had connected the dots and was simply choosing to ignore it (which infuriated you even more). The days dragged on; waking up and getting ready in silence, spending the day exploring, trying to avoid long conversations at all costs, getting ready for bed with few words and getting into bed facing away from each other. 
Andrew's response had taken a second longer than it should have. His hesitation made it clear that he was surprised by the direct approach, almost as if he hadn't thought you would say anything.  "You're damn right I did, I've seen the messages, the glances, the pictures. What was I supposed to do? Pretend that nothing was going on?" His voice was slightly louder as his eyes narrowed on you. 
"Nothing was going on. He never touched me." you raised your voice, but the words weakened. Your hands were flailing around, trying to emphasize your point.  The tears behind your eyes aching to be let free. It was too much, and you knew the implications of your words. This time, however, Andrew didn't hesitate to answer; his reply, even louder than before, came out the second you were done talking. "And I wasn't gonna sit around and wait until he did."  
The two of you stood there staring at each other, chests heaving, eyes full of emotion. You sat on the counter stool beside you before looking away from Andrew and placing your head in your hands, elbows propped on the counter. You heard his footsteps getting closer, and soon, Andrew was pulling out the stool next to you. 
You glanced at him from your peripheral view; he was staring at the kitchen in front of him, a look of contemplation on his face. "Do you have feelings for him, Y/N?" you diverted your eyes back to the counter. The question caught you off guard, "Hmm?" you could feel his eyes on you again, but you couldn't gain the strength to look up. "Do you have feelings for Quinn?" Each word was emphasized by the slight pause he took between them. 
Although you couldn't meet his eyes, you mustered enough courage to look up from your hands towards the kitchen. "I would never cheat on you, you know that." you shook your head as you said it, knowing it wasn't the answer he sought. "That's not what I asked." you wanted to look at him, to tell him he was all you wanted, that there was nothing between you and Quinn, but that wasn't the truth, and all you could do was continue the slight head shake you had started. 
Andrew didn't say anything for a bit, but you could hear the sound of his movement as he repositioned himself on the stool and leaned closer to you. "Did you fall for him?" His voice was softer and more quiet, slightly above a whisper. You tried to speak, but the tears beat you. As the tears left your eyes, you looked towards Andrew. His eyes were glued on the fridge, his expression hurt, and his eyes held a slight gloss. "Oh god," he was avoiding eye contact with you now. 
You stared at him a moment longer, trying to calm down, "Nothing happened." your voice was shakier than it had been all night, and the tone held no conviction. He turned his head slightly, the two of you locking eyes. "Don't tell me nothing happened. We've been fighting over this all week." He turned away before he even finished his sentence. Your tears continued, "You miss him, don't you?" The look on his face had hardened, but his voice remained the same. He knew the answer; it had been evident every time he called you, and you were alone or when he would try to call, only to be met with a text saying you were on the phone but would call him back. 
You kept your eyes on him; the guilt weighed heavy on you. The implication of every choice you had made since the first interaction with Quinn ran through your mind. You couldn't put your thoughts into words or rationalize your feelings. "I'm sorry." It wasn't even a valid answer, but it was all you could think of. Your emotions were running too high, and you needed a breather. He leaned back on the stool and let out a breath, but a few tears trickled down as he did. "Damn" His voice was barely audible; if you hadn't been looking at him or if the room hadn't been so quiet, you would have missed it. 
_________________________________
It hadn't been your intention to end things with Andrew that way. Despite all the issues the two of you shared, you didn't want to hurt him. When you talked everything through the following morning you both knew the relationship had been over longer than either of you cared to admit.  It had been as civil as a breakup could be, and the guilt that had once overwhelmed you started to blur.
As you looked out the plane window and saw Vancouver, you felt the missing pieces of you start to come together. It was strange how life finds a way to bring you exactly where you need to be. Accepting your graduate program at The University of British Columbia led you to a weekend of exploring and apartment hunting in Vancouver. You had found your apartment complex by accident; you had been lost looking for another building when your eyes landed on it. The large winders on every floor practically shoved you into the lobby, and when you applied, only one unit was available for your expected move-in date. It had been a long shot, and somehow you ended up winning. 
You could recall the sound of a car pulling into the attached parking garage as you pulled a box out of your trunk, unintentionally knocking down a pillow in all the commotion. As you bent down to pick it up, you could hear the car door open and close before hearing a few footsteps. They stopped as you located your missing pillow; as you stood back up, you turned to find the stranger but found yourself searching for Andrew after hearing his voice. As you stood there waiting for him to grab another box, you looked towards the elevator and saw the stranger standing there. You couldn't see his face; he was just a blur of brunette hair and a gray outfit as the doors closed, and although you couldn't make out all his facial features, you could have sworn you saw him give you a smile before the doors closed completely. And before you even had a chance, Quinn captured your attention. And unbeknownst to you then, you had made a lasting impression on him, too. 
As you stared at the city, music in your ears, in the back of the Uber home, you could see every moment you and Quin shared. Every mundane moment, from knocking on his door in the morning with breakfast bagels and coffee to drunk conversations in the back of a car after a night out celebrating to sitting in either of your living rooms watching a movie with your commentary. It was like watching a montage scene, and it felt freeing because, for the first time, there was the possibility for something more. The feeling of longing had been hidden underneath your guilt, coming hand in hand, and now both were gone, instead replaced with something positive. 
"Miss, you have a package." The voice of your building's concierge brings you back to reality. It was a relatively wide rectangular box; you hadn't ordered anything that would come in a box of that size, which fueled your curiosity even more. "Thank you." You smiled and offered a kind goodbye before walking to the elevator. 
Without hesitation, another image of Quinn flew into your mind as the elevator doors closed. The first time you spoke was in the elevator up to your floor. He smiled, encouraged you to enter the elevator first, and asked if you needed help with your box despite carrying his bag. However,  after declining his offer, he made no other effort to continue the conversation. The two of you casually glanced at each other as the doors closed, waiting for the movement to begin, but when it didn't, you looked over to the right side of the door and laughed slightly. "What floor do you need?" he asked with a slight chuckle. "Sixteenth, please." You returned his chuckle and smiled. You watched as he clicked the sixteenth button but no other. "Are you on the same floor?" You could hear excitement in your voice, but you pushed it down. "Yeah, guess that means we're neighbour neighbours" Once again, that damn smile felt contagious; he felt contagious. 
When you reached your floor, you found yourself walking faster than usual to reach your door. It had only been a week; somehow, everything was completely different yet utterly the same. You walked into the apartment and set the package down on the counter, needing to know what was inside. Opening the lid, you are met with the most beautiful arrangement of your favourite flowers. There were different shades of your favourite colour, layering beautifully on each other, but what caught your eyes was the distinct blue rose in the middle, an envelope sitting directly on top. 
The envelope had your name written on it with the handwriting you had come to memorize. Inside was a postcard from Michigan, "Y/N, I can't get you out of my head. Only two more weeks left before I'm back in Van, and I can't wait to see you again. I found this while I was out, and it reminded me of you.   -Q" You held the card close to you for a second; it had the faintest mix of florals and Quinn's cologne. You looked at the fridge before deciding to keep the note in your room. It felt intimate, something you wanted to keep between you. Something caught your eye when you took the flowers out of the box and into a vase. Inside the envelope was a small plastic bag; you reached for it and found a necklace. 
A delicate chain with a small pendant with a sun and a moon, and when you turned it over, your breathing hitched; there was a small 43 engraved. When you read the note, you assumed the postcard was what he had seen, but it was the necklace. He had seen a necklace encompassing the sun and moon, something you were passionate about, and he had added something personal. The engraving must have been something he did; the probability that it had been done in manufacturing was slim to none, making it all the more special. You put it on and never wanted to take it off. 
You grabbed the postcard off the counter and lifted it closer to your chest before taking a close-up picture from your lips to showcase the necklace and postcard, "I'm thinking about you too. To the longest two weeks that will ever exist. To the sun and the moon and back." And as you hit the send button, you couldn't help but think about what was yet to come.  
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25 - Nicholas Alexander Chavez x fem!reader
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summary: (Y/N) decides to get her brother’s best friend’s attention and he’s more than willing to give it to her.
warnings: 18+, unprotected p in v, brother’s best friend!nicholas, dominant tease/bratty submissive, slow burn, forbidden romance??, implied age gap but not by much tbh it’s mostly just power dynamic
required listening: 25 by Veruca Salt
word count: 7,742
a/n: ik I try to wait a week between fics but I’m sawriiii I just loved this one too much to not post immediately. I do have another fic in the drafts but honestly I hate it now so I don’t think I’ll post that one. anyway im already planning on continuing this one YUPPPPP 🙂‍↕️ i just love listening to my playlist and writing xoxo lmk if you’re a veruca salt fan
reblogs, likes, and replies are greatly appreciated and let me know if you'd like to see more!
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I never meant to eavesdrop on my brother’s conversations with him — Nicholas. Their voices, along with the sounds of Call of Duty blasting through the tv speakers, always managed to spill through the Jack and Jill bathroom that bridged our bedrooms. I would catch myself lingering by the bathroom door, my book or phone in hand as a cover, pretending I just happened to be nearby. My brother would crack some joke, and Nicholas’s laugh would come through low and warm, and my skin would prickle at the sound. Or sometimes I’d even hear the salacious stories of Nicholas and his fling of the week. Either way, I listened intently.
Nicholas and my brother have been best friends for years. He just showed up to the house one day and just kept coming back, like what happens whenever you find your best friend for life, like how I did. But my brother and I don’t run in the same circles, not really; he has his friends, and I have mine — and they never mixed, not even at our backyard cookouts where we’d each invite a friend or two. We always found ourselves at opposite corners of the house, and it was probably because they were a little older than us.
As a result, I never bothered, or was too nervous, to exchange more than a few words with Nicholas other than the occasional polite conversation, but he always managed to get under my skin either way. It was like he knew, somehow, like he could see right through me, past all my attempts at being casual or indifferent.
I couldn’t control the way my heart skipped a beat every time Nicholas’s eyes flicked over to me whenever I’d pass by them in the living room or as we passed around plates at the dinner table, especially not when I’d pass by him in the hallway and he’d flash me that all-too-famous smirk. I guess that’s why I eavesdropped on them; it was the only way I got to know him without having to say a word to him.
So, I didn’t know what was so different about that night that I just had to get Nicholas’s attention somehow, even if for just a second. I wasn’t sure if I would’ve bumped into him in the hallway, or even the bathroom, or not, but I still decided to slip into the skimpiest set of pajamas I had — a delicate pair of shorts that barely reached the back of my thighs and a camisole that clung to me like second skin. My mom had told me to never wear it whenever there were people over; it was “too revealing.”
“(Y/N)!” My brother’s voice traveled through the bathroom, shouting over his TV.
Hesitantly, I rolled out of my bed, my sock-covered feet quietly shuffling across the floor over to the bathroom. Before I reached the door to his room, I looked down at myself and suddenly grew shy. Maybe I was trying too hard. Would Nicholas notice? Second guessing my sudden boldness, I carefully hid half my body behind the door frame when I cracked open the door to his room.
My eyes flickered to Nicholas, who was perched on the edge of my brother’s bed, controller in hand, leaning forward slightly as he focused on the screen. He didn’t look over right away, but the second I peeked through the crack of the door, his gaze shifted back and forth between me and the TV, his thumbs hesitating on the controller.
“Yeah?” I asked quietly, trying to sound as casual as possible, one of my feet cricketing against the other. 
My brother barely glanced at me, his eyes glued to the team deathmatch round they were playing. “Do we still have any snacks left in the pantry or did you finish them?”
I hesitated, feeling Nicholas’s eyes on me. His gaze lingered, scanning over what little of me was visible behind the door. His dark brown eyes were unreadable, but there was something in his expression, something curious, that made me feel both exposed and exhilarated.
“Yeah, there’s still some cookies and chips. I'm not a vacuum,” I said finally, my voice softer now and muttering the last part. I rested my cheek against the frame, my gaze flickering between Nicholas, the floor, and my brother.
“Could you bring us some?” My brother asked, his fingers violently attacking the buttons on the controller, the sounds of loud gunshots and footsteps responding to his every button mash. “We’re in the middle of a round.”
I rolled my eyes. “Sure,” I murmured, trying to keep my voice even. I pushed off the doorframe and stepped back into the bathroom, catching the way Nicholas’s gaze dropped briefly, taking in more of me now that I wasn’t partially hidden.
I ducked back into my room, the air feeling heavier as I padded toward the kitchen. My heart was racing, every nerve in my body alive with the lingering awareness of his gaze. It wasn’t just my brother’s casual request that stuck with me, but the way Nicholas had looked at me — like I wasn’t just his friend’s little sister sneaking glances from behind doors.
In the kitchen, I opened the pantry and pulled out the cookies and chips, my nerves bubbling as I anticipated the moment I’d walk into my brother’s room wearing this outfit. I wasn’t sure what I’d expected — maybe a quick glance and nothing more, but the idea was scintillating either way.
My mom strutted into the kitchen then, still in her work clothes. “I thought I told you not to wear that when people were over,” she smirked knowingly. I had a little bit of a tendency to defy orders.
I glanced over my shoulder, feigning innocence. “It’s hot out,” I shrugged my shoulders as I closed the pantry and scampered past her with snacks in tow.
I returned to my brother’s room with the snacks in hand, pausing at the cracked bathroom door before taking a breath and sheepishly walking in. I stepped fully into the room, my bare legs feeling more exposed than they ever had before. “Here,” I called, keeping my tone neutral, like nothing about this moment felt significant, even though my pulse told a different story.
My brother barely spared me a glance as I set the snacks down in front of them, his attention glued to the screen. Nicholas, on the other hand, wasn’t as discreet. He leaned back slightly, one arm draped over his knee as he finally looked up from the game. His dark brown eyes swept over me, slow and deliberate, lingering just long enough to make me feel like every inch of my skin was on display under his gaze.
He didn’t say anything, didn’t smirk or tease the way he usually did. My cheeks burned as I shifted on my feet, my fingers brushing against the hem of my shorts, unsure what to do with myself.
“Thanks, (Y/N),” Nicholas said finally, his voice cutting through the tension. It was smooth, casual.
I smiled softly, more out of nerves than anything else, and started to retreat toward the door. “Don’t get used to it,” I mumbled, glancing over my shoulder. I cast one last glance at Nicholas. He was still watching me, his head tilted slightly, the corner of his mouth twitching like he was suppressing a smirk. It was like he knew exactly what I was doing.
Now, I don’t know why I did it, maybe because I was so flustered that I didn’t notice or maybe I subconsciously knew what I was doing, but I left my bathroom door open just a smidge, enough for the soft light of my room to spill out and shine through the darkness of the bathroom, like a beacon in the night begging to be followed. Maybe it was a dare, or maybe I was just curious to see if he’d take the bait.
I threw myself onto my bed, stomach down, trying to calm my ever-racing heart as I replayed the moment Nicholas’s gaze lingered on me. I couldn’t bite back the smile forming on my lips as I pictured the look in his eye when I walked into the room. It sent a thrill through me. Did I finally manage to pique his interest as much as he piqued mine?
My heartbeat was unrelenting, so I reached for the book on my nightstand, hoping that reading a few pages might calm me. Of course, though, I wasn’t focusing on the pages. How could I? When my older brother’s hot best friend was right on the other side of that door?
Eventually, the sound of video games and laughter died down as the minutes ticked into the late night, replaced by muffled conversation before trailing off into complete silence. The only sound I could hear, now, was the occasional turn of the page and my thumping heartbeat, maybe the imperceptible hum of the lightbulb coming from my bedside lamp.
And on the other side, Nicholas could also hear the faint scratch of a page turning, too. He was lying down in his makeshift bed of blankets on the floor, quietly scrolling on his phone. The screen of his phone cast a faint glow on his face, but his attention wasn’t on the timeline of tweets he had planned on reading through. It was on that tiny crack of light spilling into the dark bathroom, the faintest view of my room on the other side.
He couldn’t sleep. How could he? The tight, little number I was bold enough to wear but still shy enough to hide behind the door frame, the way I glanced at him when I passed through to give them snacks, the subtle sway of my hips as I disappeared back into the bathroom to my room as if I hadn’t worn that number on purpose. And now, the crack in my door was basically daring him to walk through.
I didn’t know it, but it wasn’t the first time he’d noticed me. He always looked forward to seeing me scamper through the kitchen as quickly as possible whenever they took it over for whatever they were doing, and he was always equally curious about what would happen behind my door, especially when he could hear me laughing with my friends or my CD player blasting Veruca Salt.
His friend — my brother — was out cold, snoring like a chainsaw. Nicholas glanced at him, then back at the door, then back at him, then back at the door. It was a bad idea; he knew it. I was off-limits. My brother hadn’t told him that explicitly, but he did express his distaste when Nicholas made an off-handed comment about me some a couple years ago and that was enough to deter him. But tonight, my brother was asleep, while Nicholas and I were still awake.
Nicholas turned his phone off then, quietly pulling the blanket off himself and standing up, padding quietly to the bathroom and closing the door to my brother’s room behind him. He tiptoed toward my door, taking a peek through the crack and hoping that maybe just indulging himself in the image of me would satiate him. But the moment he saw me on my bed — twiddling with the end of a braid or two or many as I laid on my stomach, propped up on my elbows as I read, my legs crossed at the ankles, the pajamas I wore barely covering anything — he knew just looking wouldn’t be enough.
My heart raced when I heard the faint creak of my door, but I didn’t look up right away, choosing to pretend I was so engrossed in my book that I couldn’t be bothered to see what had made the noise. What did make me glance over my shoulder, though, was the light clinking of glass.
I turned my head and saw Nicholas leaning against the doorframe curiously inspecting a nail polish I had left on the dresser that was near the bathroom door, a smirk on his face. That set my heart racing.
“Nicholas,” I spoke quietly as I closed the book in my hands, watching him as he continued to fiddle with the things on my dresser — nail polishes, bracelets, a hairbrush.
Nicholas didn’t say anything at first, just let his dark brown eyes sweep across my dresser one last time before they swept across my room, then finally landed on me and took in the scene — the book in my hands, the way I was sprawled across the bed, the faint flush on my cheeks that I couldn’t seem to shake.
He glanced over his shoulder back toward my brother’s bathroom door, still closed, before looking back at me. “Are you usually up this late?” he said finally, his voice low, like he was afraid of breaking the stillness of the moment.
I turned onto my side, giving him a better view of me in my pajamas. His gaze lingered on my torso, and I bit back a smile. “Sometimes.”
He dropped his arms and stepped in, his movements unhurried as he quietly closed the door behind him and looked around my room. I couldn’t believe it. He was in my room.
“Your brother’s out cold,” he said, almost like an explanation, as if I didn’t already know. He turned his head to look at the Heart poster on my wall, arching his back to stretch, his shirt riding up a little to show off the happy trail adorning his lower abdomen. I just about choked at the sight.
When he looked back at me, he had that familiar smirk tugging at the corner of his mouth, “You left your door open.”
“Did I?” I asked quietly, lying back down on my stomach but looking at him over my shoulder.
His smirk deepened, like he didn’t believe me for a second. “Didn’t you?”
My stomach flipped, the challenge in his tone making it impossible to look away, but I had to if I didn’t want him to see the heat rising to my cheeks. So I turned my attention back to my book but the words blurred together. I couldn’t focus, not at all. “You shouldn’t be in here.”
He stepped further into the room until he was at the edge of my bed looking down at me, still smirking. “You don’t sound very convincing.”
I shrugged, letting my fingers trail along the edge of the pages. I decided to give him an out, something that would test his resolve. “My brother’s gonna kill you if he finds out.”
He hesitated, just for a moment, before sitting down next to me. The mattress dipped under his weight, and I shifted slightly to face him. “I know,” he whispered as his eyes trailed my bare legs.
He slowly laid down on his side beside me, and it all started with a touch — his hand reaching out to rest on my thigh, his palm hot against my skin. My breath hitched, but I didn’t pull away. Instead, I let my leg drift closer toward him, the faintest encouragement.
“I should go,” he murmured softly, his fingers brushing up and stopping just short at the hem of my shorts. His eyes flicked up to mine, gazing at me through his abundance of eyelashes.
I couldn’t look away from his dark brown eyes, the way they softened as they met mine, yet held something deeper — something that made my pulse race. I was quiet for a moment, savoring the heat of his hand on my hand, the warmth spreading all over my body. “Yeah, you should,” I whispered, my voice lacking any real conviction.
Neither of us moved.
Nicholas’s lips parted slightly, like he wanted to say something, but no words came out. Instead, he just watched me, his gaze flicking to my lips, then back to my eyes. His hand inched higher, stopping just at the edge of my shorts again, as if he were waiting for a signal. And I gave him it, letting my book fall through my fingers and shifting closer toward him.
That was all it took. He leaned in, his hand sliding up my thigh as his lips captured mine in a kiss that stole the air from my lungs. It was slow at first, like he was testing the waters, but it didn’t take long for the tension between us to boil over. Quickly, the kiss deepened. His hands roamed, pulling me closer as I melted into him, my fingers tangling in his hair.
“Tell me to go,” he murmured against my lips, his breath warm on my skin.
I tugged him closer, “Stay.”
Nicholas’s weight pressed into the mattress as he rolled me over, his hands sliding along the curve of my waist and down to my hips as our legs tangled together. My fingers curled into the fabric of his t-shirt, pulling him closer as the world outside my room melted away. Every shift of his body against mine, every brush of his fingertips against bare skin, ignited a fire I couldn’t ignore.
His lips trailed down to my jaw, slow and deliberate, sending a wave of heat rushing through me. His breath was warm against my neck, and I arched into him instinctively, feeling his body tense in response.
I tugged at the hem of his shirt, and he obliged, pulling it over his head and tossing it to the floor. My eyes traced the lines of his shoulders, the way his muscles moved as he leaned back down, his delicate chain dangling over me, his hands framing my face like he needed to commit every detail to memory. My own hands wandered, exploring the warmth of his skin, the tension in his back as he pressed closer.
The cool air hit my skin as he slid the strap of my camisole off my shoulder, his lips replacing it with a trail of soft, heated kisses that moved to my collarbone. My heart raced as I looked up at the ceiling of my room, every sense heightened as his hands roamed lower, his touch firm but unhurried.
My breath caught in my throat as Nicholas’s lips continued their slow descent, every kiss igniting sparks along my skin. My hands moved of their own accord, tangling in his hair, pulling him closer as I arched into his touch. His hand slid under the hem of my camisole, his fingers splaying over my ribs as he paused to look at me, his dark brown eyes asking the silent question.
I nodded, and his lips were back on mine in an instant, the kiss growing more intense, as he bunched the fabric in his palm and pulled it off of me, leaving me bare-chested. He pulled back and drank the sight of me in, his jaw going tight as he closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against mine.
For a moment, I grew self-conscious, thinking maybe he would pull away completely now that he’s seen me half-naked. Maybe I didn’t measure up to the girls he’s been with. “Is something wrong?” I quietly asked.
Nicholas shook his head almost immediately, his forehead still resting against mine as he let out a shaky breath. His hands moved to cradle my face, his thumbs brushing over my cheeks as his dark brown eyes opened to meet mine. They were softer now, but no less intense.
“No, fuck no,” he muttered, his voice low and rough, like he was trying to find the right words and failing. He pulled back just enough to look at me, his brown eyes locking onto mine. “You’re perfect, (Y/N). That’s the problem.”
The raw honesty in his tone made my breath hitch, my heart pounding so loudly I was sure he could hear it. I swallowed hard, my gaze dropping for a moment before flicking back up to him. “Then why did you—?”
“I needed a second,” he interrupted softly, his voice almost strained as he cupped my cheek, his thumb brushing over my flushed skin. “You’re just—you’re making it really hard to be the good guy here.”
His words sent a rush of heat through me, my heart pounding in my chest as I searched his face. “I’m not asking you to be the good guy,” I whispered, my voice trembling slightly.
“You sure?” he murmured against my lips, his voice barely above a whisper. “Because if we do this, there’s no going back. Your brother’s gonna kill me if he finds out, and I don’t—” He broke off, his jaw tightening as he pulled back to look at me again. “I don’t want to fuck this up.”
I reached up to frame his face, my thumbs brushing over his cheekbones as I held his gaze. “I want this, Nic,” I said softly, my voice steady now despite the chaos in my chest.
For a moment, he didn’t say anything, his eyes searching mine like he was trying to figure out if I really meant it. Then, with a quiet curse, he groaned quietly, like he was fighting an internal battle, before he leaned down to kiss me again. This time, it wasn’t tentative or testing — it was all-consuming.
I gasped softly into the kiss, my hands gripping his shoulders as he pulled me closer, his body pressing against mine with a heat that made it impossible to think straight. His hands slid down my sides, his touch rougher now, less restrained, like he was done holding himself back.
Nicholas’s lips trailed down my neck, his teeth grazing the sensitive skin there, and I couldn’t bite back the quiet moan that escaped me. He groaned in response, his fingers gripping my hips tightly as he buried his face in the crook of my neck. “Jesus, baby, you’re gonna wake the whole house,” he muttered, his voice rough and muffled against my skin.
I let out a breathless laugh, tugging on his hair to make him look at me. “You’re the one talking so much,” I shot back, my voice barely above a whisper.
His dark eyes narrowed slightly, the corner of his mouth twitching in annoyance. “Oh, is that right?” he said, his tone low and dangerous as he leaned in close, his lips brushing against my ear. “You’re the one moaning like you don’t give a shit if your brother hears us.”
My cheeks burned, and I glared at him, my hand smacking lightly against his chest. “You’re an asshole,” I muttered, but the smirk at the end of my lips betrayed any conviction I’d intended to convey.
Nicholas caught my wrist gently, grinning and clearly pleased with himself, and pinned it against the pillows above my head, “And you’re a fucking tease,” he whispered, a teasing glint in his eyes. He planted a wet kiss on my lips, murmuring, “Okay, we both stay quiet then, deal?”
I bit my lip, narrowing my eyes at him, the corner of my mouth twitching with a mix of annoyance and amusement. “Fine,” I whispered, my voice barely audible but dripping with playful defiance.
Nicholas’s grin deepened, and he leaned down, brushing his nose against my own before pulling back completely and resting back on his heels as his fingers trailed down to the waistband of my shorts. His fingers lingered, his touch light but deliberate as his dark brown eyes locked onto mine. His teasing smirk faltered, replaced by something softer, something that made my heart pound harder than I thought possible. He hesitated for just a second, like he needed one last confirmation, and I gave him a small nod, my breath catching in my throat as I lifted my hips slightly.
He exhaled softly, almost like he was steadying himself, before he slid my shorts and underwear down in one smooth motion, leaving me completely bare beneath him. The air felt cool against my skin, and I had to fight the instinct to cover myself. Instead, I forced myself to hold his gaze, my cheeks flushed and my heart racing.
Nicholas’s eyes swept over me, slow and deliberate, like he was committing every detail to memory. He let out a quiet curse, his jaw tightening as he ran a hand through his hair. “Fuck,” he murmured, almost to himself, as he leaned down to rest his forehead on my stomach and leaving lingering kisses near my navel.
My fingers instinctively found their way to his hair, tangling in the soft strands as I looked down at him. He rested there for a moment, his breath warm against my skin as he closed his eyes, like he needed a second to process everything.
I let out a soft laugh, the sound trembling slightly as I tugged gently on his hair. “You’re so dramatic,” I teased, my voice light but full of warmth. “Are you sure you’ve seen a girl naked before?”
He shot his head up, his eyebrows flared in surprise, and for a split second, I thought I might’ve caught him off guard. But then his smirk returned, sharper now, and he grabbed both my wrists in one hand, pinning them above my head as he shifted to cover me completely. “Oh, you’re gonna regret saying that,” he growled playfully, his voice dropping an octave as his free hand skimmed down my side, his touch light but promising.
I squirmed under him, trying to hide the way his teasing touch was already getting to me. I don’t know what it was about Nicholas that brought out this side of me — teasing, defiant — but I loved it.
“You’re such a—” My words cut off in a gasp as he pressed his hips against mine, the sudden pressure of his sweatpants against my bare self making me lose my train of thought completely.
Nicholas chuckled softly, the sound low and dangerous as he leaned in closer, his breath warm against my ear. “What was that, baby?” he murmured, his tone smug. “You were saying something?”
I glared at him, my cheeks burning, and wriggled my wrists under his palm, “Nic, the longer you’re not inside me, the more time you’re giving my brother to wake up.”
Nicholas froze, his dark eyes widening for just a second before narrowing into something almost predatory. The smirk tugging at the corner of his lips turned wicked, and his grip on my wrists tightened slightly as he pressed his forehead against mine. But then, he let out a soft laugh, shaking his head as if he couldn’t believe what he’d just heard. “Fine,” he murmured, his tone dropping even lower, sending a shiver down my spine.
He released my wrists, and I immediately brought my hands to his chest, letting my fingers trail over the defined muscles before sliding them down toward the waistband of his sweatpants. My heart raced, my cheeks burning as I hooked my fingers under the fabric.
Nicholas shifted slightly, propping himself on his elbows as he watched me, his dark eyes hooded with intensity. The faint smirk tugging at his lips remained as I hesitated for a moment, my fingers gripping the waistband of his sweatpants. I could feel his breath on my skin, warm and steady, as if he were daring me to go further.
Slowly, deliberately, I tugged the fabric down his hips, the soft material sliding against his skin. His muscles tensed slightly beneath my touch, and I couldn’t help the way my breath hitched as his length slipped out — ready and aching. The tension between us was palpable, the room heavy with anticipation as I pushed his sweatpants lower until they pooled around his knees.
Nicholas’s hands found my hips, his grip firm but not rough as he leaned down to kiss me again, his lips capturing mine in a way that made me forget everything else. His body pressed against mine, the heat of his skin sending a rush of warmth through me as his hands trailed up my sides, fingers skimming the sensitive skin just beneath my ribs.
For a moment, we just stayed like that, our breaths mingling as we stared at each other, the unspoken tension between us reaching its peak. Nicholas’s gaze was intense, his dark eyes searching mine as if he were asking for permission one last time.
I didn’t bother nodding. Instead, I reached to wrap my hand around his length and guide him in, to which Nicholas responded by burying his head in the crook of my neck and muttering a quiet, “Fuck,” before reaching to replace my hand with his own. “You’re so wet already.”
The air seemed to still, the only sound in the room being the soft rustle of sheets and our breathing — ragged, uneven. Nicholas moved slowly at first, his grip on my hips tightening as he inserted himself into me. I let out a whimper as I felt every inch of him, the way he stretched and filled me, his warmth burning into me like a fire I never wanted to put out.
My hand found its way to his back, my nails digging lightly into his skin as I arched beneath him, a quiet gasp slipping past my lips. “Nic…” His name came out in a breathy whisper, and the sound of it seemed to spur him on. His hips moved, deliberate and measured, and every movement sent shockwaves through me.
“Baby,” he murmured into my neck, his voice strained and breathless. “You feel so fucking good.”
The heat pooling in my stomach grew with every roll of his hips, my body responding to him in a way that felt instinctual, like I had been waiting for this moment all along. His hand slid down to grip my thigh, pulling it higher around his waist as he angled himself deeper, drawing a sharp cry from me that I quickly muffled with my free hand.
“Shh,” he teased softly, his lips brushing against my ear as he chuckled, though his voice was tight with restraint. His breath was warm against my skin as he added, “You don’t want your brother barging in, do you?”
I shot him a glare through my haze of pleasure, but it was useless. Nicholas was in control now, and he knew it. The rhythm of his hips changed, slower but impossibly deeper, making it even harder to stay quiet. I bit down on my lip, my hand reaching to clutch at the sheets as waves of heat rolled through me with every deliberate thrust.
Nicholas shifted slightly, his lips brushing over my jawline before capturing my lips again in a kiss that was just as demanding as the way his body moved against mine. His free hand trailed up my side, his thumb grazing over the sensitive skin just below my ribs, making me shiver beneath him. His hand trailed further down, pressing down on my lower abdomen as if he could feel himself moving inside.
The added pressure made me gasp, my head tilting back as pleasure rippled through me, sharp and consuming, and quickly I covered my mouth again. Nicholas groaned in response, the sound low and guttural, and I realized just how loud he was getting. My heart raced, panic and desire tangling together as I reached up and pressed my other hand over his mouth, muffling the next moan that slipped from his lips.
His dark eyes widened in surprise for a split second before narrowing, a flicker of something mischievous and dangerous sparking there. His hips slowed, the deliberate roll of his body against mine making my own breathing hitch. He didn’t protest my hand, though — instead, he leaned into it, his tongue flicking out to trace along my palm teasingly, his eyes locked onto mine as if daring me to keep him quiet.
I clenched my jaw, trying to hold onto some semblance of control, but it was useless. Every movement of his hips, every flick of his tongue against my skin, was breaking me down piece by piece. He shifted slightly, angling deeper, and I bit down hard on my lip to stop the moan that threatened to escape.
I peeled the hand I had over my mouth, “Nic,” I hissed under my breath, my voice shaking as I glared at him. “You’re impossible.”
He grinned against my hand, his dark eyes hooded and filled with heat as his hips rolled again, drawing another muffled gasp from me. His free hand slid up my thigh, gripping firmly before pulling my leg higher around his waist, allowing him to press even deeper. The sensation was overwhelming, and my fingers flexed against his face as I tried to stifle my own sounds.
Nicholas groaned again, louder this time, and I pressed my hand harder against his mouth, shooting him a warning look. “Shh,” I whispered harshly, my voice trembling as I struggled to keep my own composure.
He nodded slightly, his lips brushing against my palm in silent agreement, but the way his hips moved told me he had no intention of slowing down. If anything, his pace quickened, each thrust more precise, more deliberate, as if he were testing just how far he could push me before I completely unraveled.
My hand stayed over his mouth, but I could feel the vibrations of his muffled groans against my skin, each one sending a fresh wave of heat coursing through me. My free hand clutched at his shoulder, nails digging into his skin as my body arched beneath him, helpless to the rhythm he’d set.
The tension between us was unbearable, every movement, every touch pushing me closer to the edge. My heart pounded in my chest, my breaths coming in short, uneven gasps as I fought to stay quiet, to stay in control. But Nicholas wasn’t making it easy. The hand he was using to press down on my lower abdomen slipped between us, his fingers brushing against the sensitive spot where our bodies met, and I couldn’t stop the sharp cry that escaped me.
His eyes flicked up to mine, a wicked smile tugging at the corners of his lips even as they remained muffled against my hand. He pressed his fingers harder, circling with just enough pressure to send me spiraling. My body tensed, every nerve ending on fire as pleasure crashed over me in waves, and I had to bite down hard on my lip to keep from crying out. That’s when he let go of the thigh he had wrapped around his waist and guided his hand over my mouth, pressing down to muffle my sounds.
And now, we were both there, covering the other’s mouth with our hands, trying so hard to fight back our moans. All we could hear was the sounds of skin and our labored breaths blowing through our nostrils.
The room was thick with tension, every sound amplified as we moved together, muffling each other as if the act itself were part of the thrill. Nicholas’s hand covered my mouth firmly, his dark eyes locking onto mine as his hips drove deeper, more deliberate. Each thrust sent waves of heat rippling through me, my body trembling as I teetered on the edge of control.
My breaths were shallow, uneven, my free hand clutching at his shoulder as the tension in my stomach coiled tighter and tighter. His other hand slid down my thigh, pulling my leg higher around his waist to angle himself deeper, and the sensation was overwhelming. My head tilted back, the cry building in my throat muffled against his palm.
I was close — so close it felt like every nerve in my body was on fire. Nicholas must have sensed it because his pace quickened, his movements more erratic as he chased the edge with me. His lips curved into a smirk against my hand, but the dark intensity in his gaze told me he was just as affected.
When the tension snapped, it was like a dam breaking. My thighs trembled around him, my breaths coming out in sharp, uneven bursts, as I arched beneath him, a wave of pleasure crashing over me so powerful it left me shaking. Nicholas’s hand pressed tighter against my mouth, muffling the sharp cry that escaped me as I clung to him, my nails digging into his back. He groaned in response, his movements faltering as he watched me fall apart beneath him, my hand covering his mouth falling limp over my forehead.
“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath, his voice rough and strained. His hand stayed firmly over my mouth, his other sliding down to hold my hip as his pace grew erratic, desperate.
I barely had time to catch my breath before I realized he was close too. His movements grew rougher, his control unraveling as his own breathing turned ragged. The hand covering my mouth loosened slightly, and I took the opportunity to nip at his finger, earning a low growl from him as he pulled it away.
Nicholas’s eyes snapped to mine, wide with surprise. “What the hell—” he started, but I cut him off with a fierce whisper.
“You better pull out,” I hissed, my voice sharp despite the trembling in my tone.
Nicholas’s jaw tightened as my words registered, his dark eyes narrowing with a mix of frustration and urgency. His breath hitched, and I could feel the tension radiating off him as he fought for control, his hips stuttering in their rhythm. “I’ve got it,” he muttered, his voice strained and low, almost as if he were trying to reassure himself as much as me.
“Nic,” I pressed, my tone firm despite the lingering haze of pleasure coursing through me. My nails raked lightly down his back, urging him to listen, to not lose himself completely.
He nodded, his movements becoming deliberate, careful. His hand shifted to grip my waist tightly, steadying himself as his breathing grew heavier. “I’m not gonna—” His words cut off with a guttural groan, and I felt his body tremble against mine, his restraint fraying with each passing second.
At the last possible moment, Nicholas pulled out with a strangled curse, his hand reaching down to finish himself. His dark eyes fluttered shut, his jaw clenched as his release spilled across my stomach, warm and lingering. The sight of him unraveling like that, the raw vulnerability etched into his features, made my chest tighten.
For a few moments, the only sound in the room was our heavy breathing, his body still hovering above mine as he tried to catch his breath. His head dipped forward, his lips brushing softly against my temple as he whispered, “Are you okay?”
I nodded, my voice catching slightly as I answered, “Yeah, I’m okay.” My hands found his shoulders, grounding both of us as he shifted to sit back on his heels. His gaze softened as it roamed over me, searching for any sign of discomfort or regret.
“I didn’t—” he started, his voice hoarse and unsteady, but I cut him off with a small smile.
“You didn’t,” I reassured him, reaching up to trace the edge of his jaw.
Nicholas exhaled sharply, his shoulders relaxing as he leaned down, pressing a lingering kiss to my lips. It wasn’t rushed or heated like before; it was gentle, filled with a quiet kind of affection that made my heart ache. When he pulled back, his fingers brushed lightly across my stomach, his touch careful and almost apologetic.
“Let me clean you up,” he murmured, his voice soft as he reached over to grab a discarded shirt, maybe mine, from the edge of the bed.
I rolled my eyes, my lips twitching in amusement as I watched him carefully clean me up, his movements surprisingly gentle despite the teasing smirk still tugging at his lips. When he was done, he leaned down to press a soft kiss to my stomach, his lips lingering for just a moment before lying  down beside me, pulling me into his arms without hesitation. His body was warm and solid against mine, his breathing still slightly uneven as his fingers traced idle patterns on my shoulder.
The silence that followed was thick but not uncomfortable. Nicholas’s fingers moved gently across my skin, as if he were trying to map every inch of me. My cheek rested against his chest, his heartbeat steady and grounding beneath my ear. I closed my eyes, letting myself sink into the moment, even as a thousand unspoken thoughts swirled between us.
It felt natural, lying there with him. His hand slipped to my hair, tangling in the strands softly, and I let out a contented sigh. Neither of us said anything for a long time, the stillness interrupted only by the sound of our breaths syncing together.
Nicholas was the one to break the silence, his voice low and husky. “What time is it?”
I blinked, my mind still clouded from everything that had just happened. I tilted my head toward my bedside table, squinting at the digital clock. “Almost three,” I mumbled.
He groaned, dragging a hand down his face while tightening the arm he had around me briefly before letting out a resigned sigh. “Your brother’s gonna wake up in a few hours.”
“Exactly,” I muttered, untangling myself from his arms and sitting up, “which is why you need to get out of here.”
Nicholas smirked as he sat up as well, his dark brown eyes watching me closely. “Kicking me out already?” he teased, his voice low and playful. “I’m starting to feel used, baby.”
I rolled my eyes, climbing out of bed and walking past my dirty camisole that was discarded on the floor to reach into my dresser and pull out a clean shirt, “You’re impossible, you know that?”
“You’re the one that asked me to stay,” he quipped, leaning back on his hands as if he had all the time in the world.
I shot him a warning look, but it only seemed to amuse him further. Letting out an exasperated sigh, I grabbed my shorts from the floor as I walked back over to the bed and tossed them in his direction. “If you’re so eager to hang around, you can help me get dressed. I think that’s the least you can do after fucking your best friend’s sister.”
Nicholas froze for a moment, his smirk faltering as his dark eyes widened slightly at my words. A laugh escaped him, low and incredulous, as he shook his head. “Wow, you really don’t hold back, do you?”
I crossed my arms, raising an eyebrow at him, smirking. “Am I wrong?”
He didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he grabbed my shorts from where they landed and leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees as he beckoned me closer with a playful glint in his eyes. “Alright, princess. Let me help.”
With an exaggerated sigh, I stepped closer, though the flush creeping up my neck betrayed my nonchalance. Nicholas patted his thigh, gesturing for me to stand between his legs. His hands were warm as they slid up my calves to my thighs, holding me steady as he crouched slightly to help me into the shorts.
His movements were slow, deliberate, as he guided the fabric up my legs. He tugged the waistband gently, his thumbs brushing against my hips before snapping the shorts into place. His dark eyes flicked up to meet mine, and for a moment, the teasing glint softened into something quieter, something that made my heart stutter.
I reached for the clean shirt I’d left on the bed, but Nicholas beat me to it, picking it up with a smirk. “Arms up,” he instructed, his tone mockingly authoritative as he held the shirt open.
Rolling my eyes but unable to stop the small smile tugging at my lips, I raised my arms, letting him slip the shirt over my head. His hands brushed against my skin as he adjusted the hem, smoothing it down over my waist. When he leaned back on his hands to admire his handiwork, his smirk returned, but it was softer now.
“There,” he murmured, his voice lower now. “Good as new.”
“Thanks,” I said softly, my stomach fluttering. I bent down and reached for Nicholas’s clothes and tossed them to him.
Nicholas caught the bundle of his clothes easily, the smirk on his face growing as he stood to pull his sweatpants back on. I watched as he stuffed his dick into his sweats, my cheeks growing hot as he then slipped into his shirt. The chain around his neck glinted faintly in the dim light as he adjusted it, his dark eyes flicking back to mine.
Nicholas smiled softly, running a hand through his tousled hair as he stepped toward the bathroom door.
I followed him as he reached for the door, keeping my voice low. “Please don’t tell anyone about tonight.”
He turned to face me, leaning one shoulder against the doorframe as his smirk softened into something more genuine. “Relax, baby. Your secret’s safe with me.” The teasing lilt in his voice was gone, replaced by a quiet sincerity that made my chest tighten.
I nodded, swallowing hard as I tried to ignore the fluttering in my stomach. “Good.”
He pushed the door open slowly, peeking into the bathroom to make sure it was still quiet on the other side. Just as he stepped through, he glanced back over his shoulder, his smirk returning in full force. He winked, disappearing into the bathroom with a quiet click of the door.
I rolled my eyes, biting back a smile. I stood there for a moment, staring at the closed door as the reality of everything that had just happened settled over me.
My skin still tingled everywhere he’d touched me, his hands, his lips, the way his voice had dropped when he whispered my name. It all replayed in my head, over and over and over. With a deep breath, I turned back to my bed, doing a horrible job of biting back the smirk on my lips.
I should’ve been panicking — thinking about what my brother would do if he found out, but all I could feel was a heady mix of excitement and disbelief. I had just slept with Nicholas, my brother’s best friend.
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stllmnstr ¡ 3 months ago
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something old, something new
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hello have a 2.3k drabble about Heeseung still having feelings for his ex heavily inspired by the above behind the scenes no doubt mv pics and based on this anon prompt sent to me:
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this was supposed to be short but I got carried away and ended up writing 2.3k on my PHONE in an hour so please excuse any typos 😭
⋆.˚⟡ ࣪ ˖⋆.˚⟡ ࣪ ˖⋆.˚⟡ ࣪ ˖
Lee Heeseung loves weddings.
When he admits this to people, which is in and of itself a fairly rare occasion, they assume it’s for all of the usual reasons.
The open bar, the well curated playlist, the free food... After all, those are the typical things men in their mid twenties tend to enjoy. And Heeseung always nods along. Forces a laugh whenever his conversation partner cracks another age old joke about getting a little too tipsy on the dance floor.
Besides, it’s not like he’s immune to baser pleasures. At twenty-five, Heeseung does genuinely enjoy eating well and getting drunk on someone else’s dime.
But if he digs a little deeper, is a little more honest with himself, the real reason he loves weddings so much is the romance of it all.
A white dress thats been agonized over and alternated to perfection. A cake thats been taste-tested and intentionally designed with the lucky couple in mind. A venue that likely cost an arm and a leg, but it’s worth it, because it’s the place where two people get to display the love they have for each other in front of everyone that’s important in their lives.
And Jay, he thinks, has outdone them all. The ballroom Heeseung steps into with perfectly shined shoes is jaw-droppingly gorgeous. Crystal chandeliers bathe the high ceilinged room in soft, warm light that almost glows like candles at dusk.
The aisle separates two generously sized sections of seating from one another. Each table is laid with a crease less cream colored tablecloth and a bouquet of flowers that Heeseung doesn’t want to guess the price of. It’s stunning. It’s perfect.
And Jay, Heeseung’s best friend of thirteen years, deserves nothing less.
Jake seems to agree. Coming to stand next to Heeseung, he jerks his chin towards the door that leads to the neighboring room. “I just heard from a very trustworthy source that the open bar starts at 1 pm sharp,” he grins.
Heeseung has a sneaking suspicious that this trustworthy source is Sunghoon, which means it’s likely to be incorrect. Besides, booze isn’t what he’s here for.
“Hopefully not,” Heeseung nudges Jake’s shoulder, “since no one wants to watch you stumble down the aisle.”
“At least I’m just a groomsman.” Jake shrugs. “You, on the other hand, Mr. Best Man, have to be on your best behavior. Besides, I can handle my alcohol.”
Heeseung’s lips flatten. “I have several videos that prove otherwise.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Jake waves his palm. “I’ll be good. I promise. No shots until after the ceremony.”
Heeseung just rolls his eyes. His younger friend might be a little more lax when it comes to conducting himself in public, but Heeseung isn’t actually worried. This is Jay’s wedding, after all. And no matter how much Jake and Sunghoon enjoy a good party, they also know how to take things seriously when it matters.
For a moment, Jake just looks around the room, taking it in like Heeseung had a few minutes prior. Similar actions, different conclusions. Jake doesn’t comment on the lighting or the tablecloths or even the romance. Instead, he says, “I can’t believe Jay’s actually getting married.”
“Yeah,” Heeseung breathes. Jay is the first in their friend group to officially leave bachelor-hood, and it does feel a bit strange to bear witness to. “Me neither.”
Jake is still shaking his head. “And he’s the first one out of all of us. That’s almost weirder. You know, we always thought it would be –”
Remembering himself, Jake lets the sentiment die on his lips.
It doesn’t matter, though. Heeseung already knows what he was going to say.
We always thought it would be you.
Four long years ago, at twenty-one, Heeseung had felt far too young for marriage. But that didn’t stop him from imagining what you’d look like in a white dress. What flavor of wedding cake the two of you would select from the box of samples. What overpriced venue you would decide to officially intertwine your lives in.
It didn’t stop him from tucking away a small, velvet box in the back of his drawer for safekeeping. From fantasizing about kneeling in front of you and finally sliding a gorgeous, sparking ring right where he wanted it to belong.
It didn’t stop him from making promises and plans. Adjustments to his life just to make sure there was always space for you.
But one year later, the box and the ring inside were still tucked away. And the love Heeseung kept safe suddenly had no place to go.
He told his friends it was mutual, that you’d made the decision together. But Heeseung never wanted to let go. Even if a job opportunity meant you had to move across the country. Even if it made no logical sense for him to follow when he was still finishing his degree.
It was circumstances, he explained to his friends, to his family. Not anything either of you did wrong.
But alone, surrounded by the four walls of his bedroom and the overwhelming clamor of his own thoughts, Heeseung just cried. Sobbed. The kind of tears that left him gasping for air and with a throb behind his temple.
Because he knew that he never would have done that to you. He would have turned down the job, would have found a way to make long distance work, would have transferred to another university to be close to you even if it wasn’t logical.
He would have done it, the big romantic gesture that gives the rom-com a happy ending and signals to the production team that it’s time to roll the credits.
But you didn’t. When he suggested long distance, you just sighed. And there were tears in your eyes too, but there was no fight.
So Heeseung, despite every bone in his body screaming at him not to, let you go.
And now, three years later, he’s about to watch his best friend get married and pretend it doesn’t sting. He’s happy for Jay. He is. But the selfish parts of him will always wish he was the one waiting at the end of the aisle instead. For you.
The universe has never made a habit of bending to his desires, though, and he fulfills his role as best man well. The ceremony goes off without a hitch, and Jake is appropriately steady-footed in his role as a groomsman.
The white dress is gorgeous. The cake is delicious. The venue is perfect. Whatever romance is, Jay and his fiancée — no, his wife — have captured it well.
Despite his earlier words, Heeseung makes a home for himself at the aforementioned open bar the second the ceremony is over. Knocking back another swig of whiskey, he appreciates the slight burn. At least it’s in his throat this time, instead of his heart. And at least it’s induced by alcohol instead of misplaced jealousy.
But he must have had one too many drinks, because for a fleeting moment, he swears that the late arrival that makes a hesitant entrance into the reception room is—
No.
There’s no way.
You only knew Jay because you knew Heeseung, and those flowers withered three long years ago. You have no reason to be here now.
But then he hears it, and oh the lurch in his heart hurts just as bad as it did the first time. Because despite the improbability of it all, that’s your voice that floats above the music and exchanged pleasantries with another guest. Even after all the time that’s passed, Heeseung would know it anywhere. Could pick it out of any crowd.
He turns to you slowly, as if he can delay the inevitable just a little longer. As soon as his eyes land on you, he realizes his mistake. He shouldn’t have looked at you at all, should have just slid off the bar stool and ran in the other direction because it still hurts.
You’re three years older, and the time has been good to you. The evening dress you wear hangs from your body in a way that only reminds him of what you look like beneath it, of the way running his hands and his lips and his love over the skin you conceal used to feel like second nature. The way you used to play with his hair with his head in your lap, trading small moments of intimacy after a long day.
It hurts. It aches and it stings and it burns.
He has to get out of here. He has to leave. Now.
Not caring if he’s making a scene, Heeseung stands from the barstool. The only reason he tries to be somewhat discreet is to avoid the heat of your gaze.
All the way to the door on the opposite side of the room, he doesn’t turn back. Not once. On the other side of the door, he lets his body go limp against the solid surface beneath his spine, just for a moment. He exhales a long held breath.
But the air is still stifling, even as he loosens the tie at his neck. Straightening back to his full height, he turns down a short hallway until he arrives at the small outdoor balcony he noticed earlier.
The air outside is cold, at least. Fresh.
On the horizon, the sun spends its last few moments of the day painting the sky in gorgeous, golden hues. Heeseung squints, but he doesn’t look away. Hands wrapped around the bannister that lines the balcony, he sags into himself.
Shoulders hunched, he forces a long inhale into his lungs. And then he releases it. His breath is a pattern he can cling to, something steady that tethers him back to reality. Something to focus on that isn’t the war in his mind.
But peacetime is only an illusion. After a handful of quiet minutes, he hears the door open behind him.
“Oh,” you startle. He knows it’s you, even from just one syllable. “Sorry, I didn’t realize someone was out here already. I’ll just…” Your words trail off into silence, but Heeseung doesn’t hear retreating footsteps, doesn’t hear the door close again. After another stilted moment, what he hears is, “Heeseung?”
Your voice is small. As if you can apologize just by being gentle. As if he’s a wounded animal you don’t want to startle.
And Heeseung, despite himself, does feel a bit like a kitten left out in the rain when he finds it in himself to turn and face you.
The only word he says is your name. His tone is steady, even. More so than he thought he was capable of. But he’s looking at you now too, and his eyes have never been good at hiding secrets.
“I…” You trail off again. You’re at a loss too. “How are you?”
“Don’t do that,” Heeseung shakes his head.
“I’m sorry,” you retreat immediately. But Heeseung remembers when you used to argue, when you used to fight back. When you valued the strength of your relationship over his wounded pride.
“Don’t be,” Heeseung shakes his head again. “You made your choice, so stick to it. You don’t get to…” He screws his eyes shut for a moment, fist clenching at his side. Opening his eyes again, he matches your gaze. “You don’t get to leave me and then apologize for it.”
Your breath hitches, but you don’t miss a beat. “I meant for intruding,” you tell him. “I was apologizing for disturbing you.”
But you remember how he used to love making space for you in his life. How his plans were your plans and his time alone on a balcony would only be made better if you were there, too.
And you still remember the day you were inspired by a strong bout of spring fever, how you dedicated an entire afternoon to deep cleaning.
You still remember the small, velvet box you found.
You didn’t open it, but you didn’t have to. The small, nondescript container scared you enough. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to marry Heeseung. You already had Pinterest boards full of white dresses and three-tier cakes and stunning venues. Suits that you thought would bring out his best features.
But you’d also just gotten the news of your promotion. Across the country. You didn’t know how to tell him, and you had less of an idea how to leave him.
But you knew you had to. He would follow you, if you let him. You were sure of it. But he was enrolled in the best university for his program, and you watched him fight tooth and nail to earn his spot there.
Heeseung was a bright light, a beacon of good things, and if you were honest with yourself, you felt like his commitment to you was something that only weighed him down.
He was an adult, too. A young one, yes, but a full, grown person all the same. Perfectly capable of making his own decisions, but you took that from him anyway.
And now, three years later, you can still read him like an open book. There’s hurt in his gaze, pain that lingers even now. There’s resentment, too, and you can’t blame him for it.
I still love you, you want to tell him. Because it’s true. Because you do. Because you can see it in his eyes, too.
But you’ve always been better at holding your tongue than him.
Instead, you turn on your heel, planning to exit the way you came.
Fingers around the door handle, the sound of your name stops you.
It sounds like he’s begging, like he’s pleading, and you can’t bear to turn and see the results of your devastation as surely as you hear them.
Instead, you remain motionless. You squeeze your eyes shut as tightly as you can.
And then, so faintly it’s almost lost to the wind, he says, “Stay. Please.”
.....
thanks for reading! send me a drabble prompt here if you'd like!
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earlysunshines ¡ 8 months ago
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fall is for falling (for you)
newjeans (unnie line) x fem!reader ; fluff!!!!!
synopsis: separate autumn themed oneshots with newjeans unnie line bc i saw a pile of leaves the other day ; 2k special!!
warnings: puuuurre fluff ; making out kinda ; nothing else that i can think of ; anything i didn't mention ; sorry to the readers that don’t have fall / experience a diff season atm it’s basically autumn for me :-P or maybe i’m getting ahead of myself it’s still like 20+ degrees
a/n: THANKYOU FOR 2K WHATTTTTT THE HELL!!! idk how to structure this and it's different from the usual looong fics LOL idk smth different for this crazy milestone THANK YOU!!! i can't believe this is real... i can’t express my gratitude enough… two gazilliontrillionbillion subscribers... in just over a year... i can't believe this... THANK YOU! enjoy :-D
ALSO new user whatsUP! :-p
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kim minji - pumpkin carving
minji hears the door creak open but doesn't bother to look up; she already knows it's you. she braces herself, expecting you to burst in dramatically like always: groaning loudly, tossing your bag onto the rug, and collapsing onto the couch next to her with a tired sigh. but instead of the usual commotion, she notices the absence of a familiar thump on the couch, no tired exhale signaling your arrival. 
she peeks up, only to find you grinning with a large pumpkin cradled in your arms, your eyes bright with excitement. 
“what’s this?” minji asks, eyebrows furrowing as she pulls off her headphones, glancing away from her laptop.
“it’s a sweet potato, what do you think?” you tease, your tone playful as you reach over and close her laptop without hesitation, sliding it to the side. “c’mon, it��s friday. pleeease help me carve it?”
she pauses, eyes narrowing slightly as she meets your gaze. you tug gently on her wrist, the warmth of your hand lingering on her skin, and she can feel the heat rising to her cheeks. her resolve wavers, and she sighs, tongue pressing against the inside of her cheek. 
“fine.”
minji doesn't regret agreeing, not when your face lights up like that. the way you smile makes her chest feel warm, a flutter she wishes she could escape.
you both set up at the kitchen counter, and she watches as you rummage around, grabbing all three knives you both own. 
(there used to be just one—a medium-sized knife—but you insisted on buying more. what if there were small things to cut? or bigger things? the two of you have argued over countless trivial things you own, but somehow, she always ends up letting you have your way. maybe it’s because she secretly adores you, not as subtly as she thinks.)
you put on a playlist that jumps all over the place; first, it’s sza, and you hum along, lost in the melody. then a city pop track comes on, the abrupt change making minji raise her brows. your taste in music is unpredictable, like a rollercoaster, every song a surprise. but minji never complains. she loves how you sway to the music, singing softly as you sketch a face on the pumpkin with intense concentration. 
and for a moment, she forgets about the essay she has to write, the deadline, the weekend. all she sees is you, the soft light catching the curve of your smile, and it's enough.
–
an hour passes, but it feels like only seconds.
you and minji have been carving away, scooping out the pumpkin’s insides as she grins at the way you squirm with every handful. when she slips out a soft “cute,” your face heats up instantly, but neither of you says anything more. you assume she’s talking about the face you’ve drawn on the pumpkin, but all of you hopes it’s you she’s referring to.
you sneak glances at her from time to time, drawn to the way her hair falls loose from its tie, her glasses slipping down her nose, and her tongue peeking out in concentration. you reach over to push her glasses back up, and her hand slips—almost cutting herself. you laugh, but your heart is racing inside your chest.
the kitchen table is a mess. pumpkin guts and seeds are scattered everywhere, a few strands of orange pulp hanging off the edge. you’re both standing side by side, spoons in hand, breathless from laughter.
“this is the worst pumpkin carving attempt i’ve ever seen,” minji declares, wiping her forehead with the back of her wrist, unknowingly smearing pumpkin across her skin.
“you mean the best,” you counter with a grin, scooping out another stringy handful. “it’s a masterpiece in the making.”
she rolls her eyes, but you catch the smile she tries to hide. “if by ‘masterpiece,’ you mean ‘disaster,’ then yeah, sure.”
you nudge her shoulder, still laughing. “hey, it’s not that bad! we just need to… appreciate its unique aspects.”
minji laughs like a dork, you love it—bright and loud—making your chest warm. “fine, but if this pumpkin ends up looking like a troll, i’m blaming you.”
“i’ll take full responsibility,” you joke. “besides, it’s already got your eyebrows.”
she gasps in mock offense. “excuse me? my eyebrows are perfect, thank you very much.”
you snicker and turn back to the pumpkin, but your eyes keep drifting to her. she’s leaning in close, focus intent, tongue poking out slightly as she carves a crooked smile.
it’s hard to concentrate with her so close. something about this feels different—more intimate, more charged.
(and it doesn’t help that you’ve found her attractive ever since you barged into the apartment while she was moving boxes, almost knocking over her stuff.
it also doesn’t help that your crush on her has only grown. english nerds were always a little dorky and cute to you.
or maybe it’s just minji. minji, who you used to bicker with about her loud music or her sudden screams in the middle of the night over some game.
it definitely doesn’t help that you like minji a lot.)
she catches you looking at her, and for a moment, the room goes still. her eyes soften, and your cheeks heat up again. she quirks an eyebrow. “what are you staring at?”
you shrug with a grin. “nothing, sorry. you just look stupid, that’s all.”
she rolls her eyes, but the blush on her cheeks deepens, and your heart skips a beat.
minji finishes the smile on the pumpkin and steps back, hands on her hips, looking at it with a satisfied grin. “done! would you look at that…”
the pumpkin is… well, it has a crooked smile, one eye bigger than the other, and a nose that could pass for a potato. it’s perfect.
“it’s amazing,” you say, and you mean it. not because of the pumpkin, but because of how proud she looks, her eyes bright, cheeks flushed from laughing.
she turns to you, and for a moment, you’re just smiling at each other. then, almost without thinking, you reach up and brush a stray pumpkin seed from her hair.
she blinks, startled, her breath catching. “uh… thanks,” she mumbles, her cheeks darkening to a deeper pink.
“of course,” you say softly, your hand lingering in her hair a moment too long.
the air thickens, something unsaid hanging between you. you’re about to speak, but then minji’s hand is on your jawline, and her lips are on yours.
it’s short, barely a few seconds, but in the last half-second, you start to process it and try to kiss back. but before you can properly reciprocate, minji pulls away, her hand flying back like you’re something hot to the touch.
“i’m so sorry,” she stammers, looking mortified. “i’m sorry, i’m so sorry. it’s just you looked really good, and i couldn’t help myself, and i’m so sorry, i should’ve—”
you lean in again, cutting her off, capturing the rest of her mumbled apology with your lips. she relaxes into the kiss, her head angling slightly to make it more comfortable, her hand resting on your waist. she pushes you gently against the counter, her body close to yours.
when the need for air becomes too strong, you both pull away, breathless. you look at her—her eyes still half-lidded, cheeks flushed deep red, and you can’t help but giggle, hiding your face in your shoulder to mask how flustered you are.
you just kissed your roommate, and she kissed you back, pulled you closer by the waist, tasted like orange flavored lip balm, smelled like lavender and something floral.
“holy shit,” you mumble, half-laughing. “we just kissed.”
“y-yeah.” minji’s voice is small, almost disbelieving. “did you like it?”
“minji, you’re so cute.” you pull back to look at her, smiling as you smooth her hair. her glasses slide down again, so you take them off and set them on the counter beside you. you twirl a strand of her hair around your finger, teasing her, and she looks like she might melt on the spot.
her hand slides to the back of your neck, making you shiver, and she leans back just enough to murmur, “i’m assuming you did.”
“good observation,” you say, rolling your eyes.
she laughs, her fingers pressing slightly into your skin, and your knees feel a little weak. “so, do we keep carving pumpkins or…?”
you grin, pulling her closer. “we could… make out a little more on the couch instead? if our lips go numb, then… movie?”
minji’s smile is bright, her eyes soft. “i like that idea.”
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hanni pham - a hoodie for the seasons changing
hanni walks along the inside of the sidewalk because you decided when you were eleven that it was better for her to be farther from the street, less at risk. even now, a few weeks into your last year of high school, you still keep her on the safe side. it's just one of those things you do without thinking. it’s an unspoken rule between the two of you, so hanni hadn’t thought twice about the way you pulled her by the arm to push her on her designated side.
(she did think twice about how firm your grip was, and how you had your hand on her. your bigger, stronger, nicer hands.)
with the weekend ahead, you both agree there’s no better plan than crashing at your place after school on a friday. your hands brush against each other as you walk, but neither of you say anything. you never do; never have, not about the little things, like the shared smiles, the secret glances, the quiet laughter. instead, you let yourselves enjoy the moments, bask in the warmth that fills your chest each time.
you make it to your house, then up the stairs until you two are in your room. you immediately find hanni's sweatpants in your closet — the ones she left behind last time because she’s at your house more than half the week. you'd washed them with your clothes on laundry day, because it would’ve been rude not to. you toss them to her along with one of your t-shirts. “go change,” you say, nudging her toward the bathroom with a grin.
"hey!" hanni groans, swatting your hand away as you poke her side, making her jump. “you’re so—”
“just hurry up and change so we can relax on my bed. you know how i feel about outside clothes…”
she rolls her eyes but can't help the smile that tugs at her lips, watching the little crease form between your brows from the annoyance. it’s cute, she thinks, even if she’d never admit it. she closes the bathroom door, locks it, and starts changing. her sweatpants fit the same — they’re hers, after all — but your t-shirt hangs loose and oversized on her. it’s soft against her skin, and smells like your detergent and jasmine and peaches, like you. her heart races a little. 
she catches her reflection in the mirror and notices how the shirt falls around a fingers length past her waistline. it’s not like she’s drowning in the shirt, but it’s definitely a size or two larger; you’re taller and more muscular, which happens to be her type — a fact she’s noticed a little too much for her liking. she feels a flutter in her chest, a mix of nerves and something she doesn’t want to name, then quickly shakes it off, rolling her shoulders like she can physically push the feeling away.
she takes a breath, tugs at the hem of the shirt once more, and steps out of the bathroom, trying not to think about how much she likes wearing something that belongs to you.
when she steps out a few minutes later, she finds you on your bed with your legs spread out and hands up to hold your phone. you’re in plaid pajama joggers and your dad’s old university hoodie, you look comfy and snug, you look adorable.
she jumps on your bed, landing beside you with a bounce. the mattress shifts, and your phone slips from your grip, smacking you square in the cheek. hanni laughs at the sight.
“hey!” you groan, shooting her a playful glare.
“loser.” she mutters, reaching over to mess up your hair. “scoot over, you’re hogging the whole bed.”
“whatever.” you roll over, patting the space beside you. hanni shuffles closer, pulling the blanket over both of you. your arm naturally slips under her neck, and she nestles in, the top of her head resting against your chest.
“comfy?” she can hear the smirk in your voice.
“yeah.” she replies softly, though her heart races. 
neither of you ever comments on the way you always end up like this, close and tangled up in each other. the term is ‘cuddling,’ but if either of you were to call it that, you’d probably cringe, cheeks flushing with an embarrassed heat neither of you could ignore.
hanni grabs her phone, opening instagram. she scrolls, her breathing evening out as she likes every animal video and taps through every story. you watch her through half-closed eyes, feeling a calm settle over you. your other arm drapes over her waist, your breathing slowing, growing heavier. 
she doesn’t notice at first, too engrossed in her phone. but when she switches to the camera, she catches a glimpse of your nose nuzzled in her hair, your eyes fully closed. she zooms in to confirm the soft snores she hears, then grins, quietly snapping a picture. she shifts, turning the camera on herself to capture both of you together.
for a while, she stays like that, tucked in your arms, watching an episode of a crime show she’s gotten hooked on. her head tilts at an odd angle, but she doesn’t mind. you’re asleep and warm beside her, and that’s all that matters.
three episodes later, she checks the time and realizes over an hour and a half has passed. somewhere in that time, you’ve pulled her closer in your sleep, murmuring something she can’t quite make out. her heart stutters each time your hand shifts against her waist, your fingers brushing against the fabric, the only layer away from her skin.
her stomach growls softly, breaking the quiet, and she decides it’s time to wake you up. turning over, your faces are inches apart, and she stops, taking a moment to just look at you. then, she leans back slightly and snaps another picture before reaching to poke your cheek. when you don’t stir, she pinches instead, shaking your shoulder lightly.
you groan, turning away from her. “five minutes… please.”
“c’mon, sleeping beauty, i’m hungry…” she sighs, her tone teasing.
“five minutes.” you mumble, voice thick with sleep. “just five more…”
hanni sighs dramatically, then tries a new tactic. “i’ll pay if you get up right now. anything you want from the convenience store.”
you crack one eye open, barely, squinting at her. you roll over, sprawling into a starfish position. “fine… but five minutes, okay?” you plead, clinging to her leg.
hanni laughs softly at the warmth radiating from you, her resolve weakening. she runs her fingers through your hair, massaging your scalp gently until five minutes turns into ten, then fifteen. finally, she nudges you awake, and the two of you head out, still in your cozy clothes.
as you walk to the convenience store, staying close, hanni steps on a leaf that crunches underfoot. “wow, it’s already fall,” she murmurs.
“well, obviously.” you tease, only to get a kick to the back of your knee. you nearly stumble, catching yourself with a laugh. “what the hell?”
“you suck.” she grumbles, bumping her shoulder against yours.
“you suck more,” you retort, nudging her back.
“whatever.”
you smile at her, and she catches it from the corner of her eye. she nudges you away again, but you keep staring, unable to help yourself. “you’ve gotten really pretty, you know?”
“are you saying i used to be ugly?” she laughs lightheartedly, expecting a playful response, but instead, you surprise her.
“you’ve never been ugly.” your voice is softer, more sincere. “you’ve always been pretty.” then your voice gets quieter, “gorgeous.”
there’s a pause, both of you walking in silence for a moment. you kick a small rock forward, and it lands by hanni’s feet. she kicks it ahead, breaking the quiet. “thanks.” she says, feeling your eyes on her but not daring to meet your gaze. “you’ve always been cute too, ever since we met in fifth grade.”
“oh.” you whisper, looking up just in time to see the store ahead — a small savior from the tension that’s thickened the air between you. you clear your throat, trying to shift the mood. “i can’t wait for my free dinner.”
hanni pushes you playfully, and you pout, making her wish she could capture the expression and keep it forever.
you two head inside, and hanni visibly relaxes as the warm air greets you. she hadn’t mentioned how chilly it was outside, even though she could’ve easily put on her jacket. part of her had hoped, maybe, you’d notice and offer her your hoodie instead.
both of you wander around the store for about ten minutes, emerging with a pork bun and a sweet tea in your hands, while hanni clutches a sweet pastry and a can of soda. instead of turning back towards your house, you keep moving forward, hanni trailing just behind you. 
the route is familiar. it’s the path down to the little stream where you and hanni have shared countless secrets, talking until the sun dips below the horizon. tonight feels like one of those nights, perfect for sitting on the favorite bench you two have claimed as your own, watching the sunset as it starts a little earlier than usual.
you kick a small rock into the stream, watching the ripples spread out, and catch hanni shivering slightly in the corner of your eye as she takes a small bite of the sweet potato-filled bun. 
“can you hold my stuff?” you ask, extending your hands. hanni hums in confusion but takes your things without hesitation.
she watches as you stand up, pulling off your hoodie. her eyes linger on the way your long-sleeve shirt lifts slightly, revealing a hint of your torso, the lean muscle just barely visible in the fading light. she catches herself staring and quickly looks away, cheeks warming. you fix your hair casually before draping the hoodie over her lap.
she furrows her brows, looking up at you. “what?”
you glance down at the hoodie, then back at her. “put it on.”
“why?”
“because you’re cold.” you shrug, sitting back down beside her and taking the food and drinks out of her hands to set them down. you grab the hoodie again and pull it over her shoulders, tugging it down until her head pops through and the hood falls over her eyes. “better?”
she mumbles, “you didn’t have to.”
“it’s getting colder. i’m fine like this.” you reply, pinching the fabric of your shirt before reaching out to adjust the hood over her forehead, smoothing down her hair. a small smirk tugs at your lips as you add quietly, “besides, i know you wanted my hoodie anyway.”
she nearly chokes on air, her cheeks burning. “i– i didn’t! you’re so–”
“you look better in it anyway,” you chuckle, turning back to face the stream. you sneak a bite of her pastry, the playful smile on your lips growing.
hanni huffs but doesn't protest, her fingers curling into the sleeves of your hoodie, a smile sneaking onto her face despite herself.
she looks at you fondly, biting the inside of her cheek, before crossing her arms and turning her gaze to match yours. your hoodie is thick with your scent, and hanni feels like she could drown in it. without realizing it, she scoots closer, and you instinctively wrap an arm around her.
hanni can’t hold back anymore.
“y/n.”
“yes?”
“the fall dance is really early this year.”
“yeah, it’s next week. i feel like i’ll breathe and it’ll already time to get ready for it.”
“do you have a date?”
you scoff, shaking your head with a small laugh. “you know i’ve never managed to get a date for that. we always end up going with yunjin’s group anyway. are you teasing me for not having one?”
hanni chuckles, leaning even closer against your side. “maybe a little.”
“do you have a date?” you ask, glancing down at her.
“no.”
“you know, i overheard jay’s friends talking. sounds like he might ask you out.”
hanni cringes at the thought of jay, the guy from her statistics class who never stops staring at her. his crush on her is painfully obvious, and he always finds an excuse to talk to her or get her attention.
but the truth is, hanni's always wished you’d be the one to ask her to the fall dance, but you’re oblivious, always a little clueless.
“y/n,” she tries again, voice soft.
“yes?” 
“we should go to the fall dance together.”
“yeah, i was thinking that too. should we go with yunjin’s friend group again? jimin also asked if we wanted to–”
“no,” hanni interrupts, pulling away from your arm, and looks at you seriously. you tilt your head, eyebrows knitting together in confusion. she meets your gaze, but quickly looks away, suddenly feeling too exposed. “i was wondering if… well— ugh.” she pinches the bridge of her nose, then takes a deep breath and blurts out, “we should go together, alone, just us. we don't have to actually go to the dance, I know we just went out in the city last time and crashed at yunjins place and we can just do whatever you want to! i don't really care i just want to be with you becauseilikeyoualotand--"
hanni pauses before finally getting to her point. "i want you to be my date, y/n."
your lips curl into a sly smile, and then you laugh.
hanni's face is a mix of confusion and anxiety, her mind racing with uncertainty at your reaction. 
“took you long enough,” you say, grinning wider now. “i was going to ask you out, but i wanted to see if you had the guts to do it first.”
“asshole!” hanni groans, shoving you away. she turns her face to hide the deep flush coloring her cheeks. “i take it back.”
“no, you don’t.” your arm tightens around her, pulling her closer again, and you use your free hand to gently tilt her face towards you, fingers brushing her chin. “i’m not going to let you.”
her breath catches when your eyes flicker down to her lips, then back up to her eyes.
“w-was that a yes?” hanni asks, voice small, almost uncertain.
your fingers drop from her chin, and you lean back slightly against the bench. both of you are moving closer, almost unconsciously, drawn together by the tension. she feels her eyelids flutter, and you tilt your head, leaning in just a bit more.
“if i kiss you, would you take that as a yes?” you whisper, eyes focused on her lips.
hanni’s voice is barely audible as she murmurs, “mhm,” giving you the green light. you lean in and press a soft, quick kiss to her lips. she melts into it, feeling every nerve ending come alive in those few seconds. you pull back just enough to take in her flushed cheeks, the warmth of the autumn sun casting a soft glow over her face.
“i’d love to be your date, hanni,” you say softly, smiling as her face breaks into a relieved grin.
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danielle marsh - apple picking
danielle stands beside you, her eyes bright with excitement as she takes in the familiar sight. she's wearing a pair of denim overalls over an old, oversized sweater that you know belongs to her dad, her wavy brown hair clipped up to keep loose strands from framing her face.
the apple orchard stretches out before you, rows of trees dotted with red and green apples glistening under the golden afternoon sun. you and danielle have been coming here every fall since you were kids, but this is the first time you've managed to make it back since starting college. the sunlight feels warm against your skin, but it definitely makes her shine brighter, even in the cool crispness of fall.
she grabs your hand, slipping her fingers into yours without a second thought, and pulls you down the path toward the orchard's entrance. you grin at how eager she is; being here together again fills you with a deep, comforting warmth. being around danielle always does that to you, really. 
a friendly man greets you at the entrance, handing you a basket and asking if you have any questions. you both shake your heads, and he gives you a cheerful smile, wishing you good luck.
it’s peak apple-picking season, so naturally the orchard is filled with families, couples, and groups of friends, all scouring the trees for the best apples. there’s a little worry in the back of your mind that the good ones might already be gone.
“so many people,” danielle breathes, a little awestruck. “i wonder if we’re too late.”
“we’ll be fine,” you assure her, squeezing her hand lightly. “when have we ever gotten a bad apple? even the green ones end up sweet.”
“maybe that's because you always pick them~” she teases, giving you that playful smile that always makes your stomach twist and turn. you hate it a little, but you love it more—especially the way it makes your cheeks heat up.
“you're so— ugh.” you look away, trying to hide the way she flusters you, but you tug her hand, pulling her along.
you wander a bit farther down the path, away from the crowd. danielle’s eyes light up when she spots a tree heavy with apples. she lets go of your hand, darting forward, studying the branches.
“this one’s perfect,” she says, reaching up on tiptoe, fingers just brushing a particularly shiny apple.
you watch her struggle for a moment, biting back a laugh. “need some help?”
she glances back, trying to look serious but failing. instead, she gives you her signature pout, the one that makes you melt everytime you see it. “i guess i could use a little help,” she admits.
you move closer, setting the basket down. “hop on,” you offer, patting your back.
she giggles before jumping onto your back, her laughter bright in your ear as you steady her by holding her legs. she reaches up, plucking the apple from the branch with a satisfied hum. "got it!"
“nice catch,” you say, lowering her back to the ground.
she turns to you, cheeks flushed from the thrill of the simple task, still holding the apple. “i’ve got my own personal apple-picking assistant,” she teases, nudging you.
“not free of charge,” you joke, smiling at her. 
her happiness is contagious, and you're more than willing to let it take over the afternoon. 
(and really, your whole life—but maybe you’re getting ahead of yourself.)
“but always happy to help, miss marsh.”
you and danielle spend the next couple of hours wandering through the orchard, picking apples, laughing, and reminiscing about the times you’d done this as kids. you remember danielle’s dad lifting you up on his shoulders when you were too small to reach, and the time she accidentally knocked one of your teeth out with a misplaced apple throw. her laughter fills the space between you, and more than once, she climbs onto your back again, her hands on your shoulders, her face so close you can feel her breath on your neck. it’s nerve-racking, but much more heart warming.
as the sun starts to dip, the air cools, and you catch danielle stifling a yawn. “getting sleepy?” you ask, watching her rub her eyes the same way she used to when you were younger.
"maybe a little," she admits, yawning again, trying to blink away the sleepiness settling in her eyes. "but i don't want to leave yet. this is too much fun."
 really, she doesn’t want the day to end at all. spending time with you like this feels like the good old days, back when things were simple and easy, and danielle would do just about anything to stretch it out a little longer. she's always been whipped for anything involving you, for every shared laugh, for every time your shoulder accidentally brushes hers. she knows she would spend every minute she has left doing nothing but this, being with you, if she could. it's been harder lately—with college and schedules pulling you both in different directions, with classes, work, and life taking up so much of the time she used to have with you. the thought makes her chest ache a little, makes her cling to this moment even more tightly, like she could hold on to it forever. 
“it’s been a while, hasn’t it?” she adds softly, her voice barely above a whisper, almost like she’s talking to herself more than you. “since we just got to be like this.”
“yeah,” you agree, a touch of something bittersweet in your smile. “way too long.”
her fingers brush yours, almost like she’s afraid you’ll slip away if she doesn't hold on, her hand still warm from holding yours all afternoon. “i wish we could do this every day,” she sighs, her tone playful and smile warm, but it makes her heart ache a bit.
you feel your heart squeeze at that, at the honesty in her voice, and you reach out, squeezing her hand in return. “me too,”
for a moment, you both stand there, just holding hands, feeling the weight of all the missed moments and the sweetness of the one you’re in now. the orchard is quieter now, the sun sinking lower, casting everything in a soft, golden light. you think it makes her look even more beautiful, like she belongs in a place like this, caught between the sunset and the apples and the way her smile seems to light up her whole face.
“anyway,” you clear your throat, breaking yourself from your trance. “we’ve been here for hours, dani,” you chuckle. “it’s okay if you’re tired.”
“okay, maybe i am tired,” she says, shoulders slumping. “fine, let's head back.”
“it’s an hour drive anyway, maybe longer with traffic,” you point out, pinching her cheek just because. “you can sleep in the car.”
after paying for your apples and accepting a free mini apple pie from the cashier, you head back to the car. you hold her hand with one hand and carry the bag of apples with the other, feeling content as you walk through the fading light.
at the car, danielle settles into the passenger seat, her eyes fluttering shut as soon as you start driving. you glance over at her, peaceful and serene in sleep, her lips slightly parted. she looks so pretty under the soft glow of the streetlights that you can’t resist taking a quick picture when you reach the nearest stop sign.
you drive quietly, letting the soft sounds of her breathing fill the car. when you arrive at her house, you unbuckle her seatbelt carefully, brushing your fingers over her skin in the process. she murmurs something in her sleep, but doesn’t wake. you gently lift her out of the car, cradling her against your chest. she instinctively wraps her arms around your neck, holding on like she doesn’t want to let go.
getting inside is a bit of a challenge; you end up going through the gate to the backyard. once you’re inside, you lay her down gently on the couch, intending to pull away, but she tightens her grip around you. “no, y/n… stay,” she mumbles.
your arm moves around her, instinctively pulling her closer, and you can feel the gentle rise and fall of her breathing against you, her body fitting perfectly into the curve of yours. she smells like apples and cinnamon and the orchard and what it feels like to be a child and filled with adoration. it fills your senses, making you feel like you’re wrapped up in everything that feels good and familiar.
your fingers continue to gently massage her scalp, and before long, your eyes grow heavy, and you drift off with her beside you, feeling completely at peace.
—
you aren’t sure how long you’d been asleep when the creak of the front door makes you stir. your eyes flutter open to a blurry room, the dim light barely catching on the edges of furniture. you blink, trying to sit up, but danielle’s weight is still against you, her face tucked into the curve of your neck, her breaths soft and steady. 
a quiet voice breaks the sleepy haze. “well, look at that.”
you blink harder, clearing your vision to see danielle’s parents standing in the doorway, looking amused. their expressions are soft, eyes twinkling with the kind of knowing that makes your cheeks flush. you shift slightly, attempting to move, but danielle’s hold tightens, her face burrowing deeper into your neck, refusing to let go even in her sleep.
“hi,” you manage, voice thick with sleep, feeling the warmth creep up your face. “we were just… she fell asleep in the car, and i didn’t want to wake her.”
danielle’s mom smiles gently, eyes creasing at the corners. “you two look comfortable. did you have fun at the orchard?”
“yeah…” you murmur, still a little groggy, the day’s warmth lingering in your chest.
danielle’s dad chuckles, his gaze softening. “she’s hanging on like a little bear,” he says with a grin. “reminds me of when you two were kids, falling asleep in the backseat. she’d twist herself into the strangest positions, and you always seemed to make room for her.”
of course you did, you always made room for her, whether that was in the backseat of her parents’ car, your mind, or your heart.
you feel your cheeks get hotter, but there’s a smile tugging at your lips. you glance down at danielle, her face still nestled into you, and it strikes you how natural it feels, like this was always how it was supposed to be.
as her parents quietly make their way upstairs, you lean back into the cushions, fingers absentmindedly brushing through danielle’s hair, the strands soft against your skin.
“y/n?” her voice is a soft mumble, barely more than a whisper. “are my parents home?”
“yeah,” you say softly, feeling her shift slightly.
“mhm... can we stay like this?” her voice is slurred, on the edge of falling back into sleep.
“whatever you want, dani.”
“okay,” she breathes, then after a pause, “hey, y/n?”
“yeah?”
“thanks for today,” she sighs, her words sleepy and warm against your neck. “i love you.”
the words make your heart swell, and maybe it’s the sleepiness or the quiet of the room, but you find the courage to press a soft kiss to her forehead, even if it means twisting awkwardly. you close your eyes, letting yourself relax into the moment, thinking that maybe, just maybe, this is exactly where you’re meant to be.
“i love you too danielle.”
478 notes ¡ View notes
bbyobbyo ¡ 11 months ago
Text
Ever since you stopped using his Spotify account in the mornings, you find other ways to mess with your boyfriend.
A short continuation of this fic, but can be read as a standalone.
content: fluff, established relationship, idol!Jihoon, banter, reader and jihoon just have a permanent jam session going on, they’re in love i swear
wc: 857
note: ahhh they’re back!! thank you to everyone who read the first part and gave it love😊 this has been rotting my brain for a while and i originally was playing with this concept for the original but couldn’t pull it together but we’re here now! shoutout to @highvern because it was partly inspired by her fic “Between the Titles” which is such a great read that i highly recommend along with literally everything else she writes!! all the songs featured here are real and from an era of kpop I hold near and dear to my heart so if you recognize any of them, you’re a real one 🥰
Jihoon is not a morning person, never has been. As he sits in the dressing room of the filming studio, he can feel his eyelids getting increasingly heavy. Some of his members are actively sleeping, in fact, and Jihoon knows he’ll be joining them soon if Wonwoo takes any longer in that makeup chair.
Blasting in his ears is his usual Bruno Mars playlist, a sad attempt to try to recover his energy before he knocks out next to Mingyu sleeping on a mat on the floor, but to no avail because his mind slowly slips away until a piercing airhorn noise jolts him awake.
SEVENTEEN TEEN TEEN NEOWANA SAI E
Uhh. This was definitely not his Daily Bruno Mars Mix.
He immediately searches his screen to find out what happened when he finds his answer in the form of a text from you.
[8:18 am] good morning sleepyhead :)
[8:18 am] hope I didnt scare you too bad :)
He scrunches his face up in disbelief, half amused that you managed to catch him off guard with possibly the most annoying wake up song on Seventeen’s discography, and half annoyed at the realization that he must’ve forgotten to cancel your Spotify Jam session from yesterday.
He decides to leave your text on read. After all, he has plenty of time to be petty today. Furiously searching through his library, he queues up a song and before Mingyu can finish singing the first chorus, he smashes the next track button in smug anticipation.
Now Playing: Fxxk U • Gain, Bumkey
And he doesn’t have to wait long before he gets your reply.
[8:20 am] oh i see how it is
Now Playing: This is War • MBLAQ
If Jihoon wasn’t awake before, he definitely is now. Even as he gets called in to do his makeup next, he thinks carefully about his next move.
Now Playing: LOSER • BIGBANG
…
Now Playing: WHO, YOU? • G-DRAGON
An audible scoffs escapes from his lips as he involuntarily tilts his head back in amusement, much to the dismay of his makeup artist who had just started on his foundation. He mutters a shy sorry before resuming his search for a reply. Maybe he needs to take a different approach to this if he hopes to continue having Jam sessions with you in the future.
Now Playing: Whatcha Doin’ Today • 4Minute
As Jihoon eventually discovers, his hopes to change the topic of conversation were in vain as two songs were suddenly queued one after another.
Now Playing: Why Don’t You Know • CHUNG HA, Nucksal
Next in Queue: Mind Your Own Business • Ailee
Jihoon thinks he’s met his match, coming to the realization that he could never out sass the love of his life. But he wasn’t willing to back down so easily either.
Now Playing: I’m so sick • Apink
Next in Queue: Because of you • After School
Your next move nearly sends him to tears.
Now Playing: Excuse Me • AOA
Next in Queue: You Don’t Love Me • Spica
Next in Queue: I ain’t going home tonight • Navi, Geeks
Next in Queue: I Don’t Need a Man • miss A
As he chuckles to himself for what seems like the hundredth time this morning, this newfound form of entertainment suddenly becomes incredibly precious. Although you see each other nearly every day, Jihoon realizes just how much he misses you, talking to you about everything and nothing at all, bantering like you’ve known each other for your entire lives.
Now Playing: Am I too easy? • U-KISS
...
Now Playing: Mystery • Beast
Even though he couldn’t be with you physically, he knew you were enjoying yourself just as much as him on the other side. He could almost picture your smile of satisfaction as you found your next song, knowing that he would appreciate your humor. And appreciate he did, happily tapping away at his screen until his makeup artist puts on his finishing touches and tells him to call the next member.
Now Playing: Gotta Go • CHUNG HA
Next in Queue: I’m Busy • 2NE1
Next in Queue: Plz Don’t Be Sad • HIGHLIGHT
…
Now Playing: Okay Dokey • MINO, ZICO
Little does he know that his members are in the corner snickering at the sight, knowing that only one thing could have their producer smiling like an idiot at his phone the whole morning.
Soon enough, Jihoon and his members get swept up into their schedule involving the filming of various contents for their Youtube Channel, a task that usually takes the entire day if a game is involved. Thankfully, the game allowed for members to go home early, a rare treat considering how competitive his members can get when it comes to shooting content.
After his usual rounds of “good work everyone” to the company staff and his members, he gets ready to see the person who been on his mind (and in his ears) since the morning. Taking out his phone, he queues one last song while exiting the building.
Now Playing: Run to you • SEVENTEEN
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lamentationsofalonelypotato ¡ 2 months ago
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Chapter 3: But I Don't Want to Carry On Like Everything Is Fine
Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!Reader, Reader POV
Summary: With a birthday printed on your wrist that happened over a hundred years ago, you always thought that you were cursed to never meet your soulmate. But when you finally meet the man that's supposed to be the other half of your soul, you wonder if the stars were wrong, and wonder how this man was meant for you. Reader is Hughie's sister, is not a supe, and is a Literature Professor that gets dragged into the middle of things. This fic takes place in an AU set loosely after Season 3 and does deviate from the plot of The Boys
Tropes: Soulmate AU, Little bit of Grumpy and Sunshine, Age Difference (Reader is in her 20s), Protective Ben/ Soldier Boy, Jealous Ben/Soldier Boy
Warnings: I'm gonna label this one 18+ because it's Soldier Boy and we all know he's a warning. Homophobic comments towards Hughie (It's Soldier Boy y'all), Self deprecating thoughts, ANGST, SADNESS, HEART RIPPING OUT OF CHEST (figuratively because it's what it felt like to write this), Fear? Mentions of past graphic death, Mentions of torture (SB in Russia), Cursing, Mentions of past abuse (verbal abuse and it's SB doing it to someone because… we ALL know), Mentions of drinking, Mentions of Sex, Mentions of Death, Loneliness, Longing, Basically the reader just wants to be loved, Reader wears glasses?, Soldier Boy might be a little OOC.
Word Count: 6.9K
Song Inspiration For Chapter: Love In The Dark By Adele (Title for chapter taken from this song)
Playlist For Series!✨
Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!
A/N: I know this chapter is a long time coming, but thank you so much to everyone who has loved this series so far, and for encouraging me to come back to it. I hope y'all are strapped in for a ride, because this is when all the angst starts to unfold… But also… I might have changed up the Soulmate AU even more in a crazy more heartbreaking direction so, there's that too
Series Masterlist
Main Masterlist
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Guide:
Reader's thoughts are in italics and in first person.
Ben's thoughts in italics, bold, and blue!
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Previously:
"I've been looking everywhere for you sweetheart." The man rumbles, the words vibrating against your fingertips where they rest against his muscular chest. He smiles at you and somewhere deep down you feel something break open that you thought was locked away long ago.
And as you stand there looking up at the man you thought you'd never see again, you feel a flicker of something that could grow into a blaze.
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You stand there in the silence that follows the words of your soulmate, the rough vibration of his voice still trembling through your fingertips where they lay against his chest, as you stare up into his hypnotic green eyes. The sunlight that streams in from the windows at you back traces the hardened edges of his handsome face turning his dark hair a honeyed brown. A smile pulls at the end of his lips, crinkling his eyes, and bringing a softness to the rugged features that make your heart beat quicken.
He was the most beautiful man you’d ever seen and yet nothing what you’d expected. You briefly wonder if you were what he expected, but judging from the women you'd seen him with in his memories you weren't, given that you looked nothing like them.
The air around the both of you warms as electricity pops and crackles along your skin skittering against the flesh and bringing goosebumps in its wake. A wave of heat travels from where Ben's hand is gently cupping your chin in his calloused fingertips, that makes you feel like you're melting from the inside out.
Nothing else exists in the world except the two of you. There's no need to breathe, no need to see, and no need to speak, because all you know is your soulmate. You can feel the beating of his heart in your own chest, feel the thrum of electricity in his body along your nerve endings, and each breath he takes you can feel vibrate in your lungs.
You'd spent years feeling like a freak, lost, and out of place, but standing here with Ben so close that you can feel his breath on your face, makes you feel whole for the first time in your life.
He's still too far away.
A voice whispers in your ear and you long to close the distance between the two of you, to hold him tight and never let him go.
The date on your wrist sears hotter than it did the first day you met him burning through the foundation once again that you'd smeared across it to hide it  and the golden cord that wove through the air securing his heart to yours seconds ago grows so hot that it turns a blinding white. And just as you think you'll have to shut your eyes from the brilliant light, the cord squeezes your chest to tight it takes your breath away.
You inhale sharply as a flood of emotions comes washing over you that aren't your own, memories that you'd only seen in your dreams flash through your mind as if you lived them, and Ben's eyes widen as he feels the same thing. His heart beats in tandem with yours, the space between you growing to almost nothing as the cord yanks you so close that you can feel his breath on your lips and his hands fall to your hips to steady you against him, sending goosebumps prickling over your body with his touch.
You'd read about what it was like to meet your soulmate before and people had tried to tell you, but for everyone it was different and no one ever described as anything like this. Especially not happening a second time after they'd crossed paths.
This shouldn't be happening, we've already met.
But you know you're not imagining this, you know that your soul is singing to Ben's, calling out to his and both of them are twisting between the two of you, weaving you together, binding you as one.
The spark in the pit of your stomach you felt the moment Ben's eyes locked with yours has begun to flare again until it burns into a wild-fire, but it's not love you feel, not compassion, not relief, or love, it's fear.
It sobers you.
Its cold finger drags down your spine and seizes in your chest, wiping away whatever else you're feeling for the handsome man standing only millimeters from you.
The Ben's memories you re-lived in your dreams come roaring back like a lion over a kill, each one more horrific than the last.
You see your soulmate standing triumphantly over bodies burned beyond recognition, see him beating someone into submission his fists splattered with red, watch as he laughs at the torment of his younger teammates and then opens his mouth to say something so repulsive it makes your skin crawl, and you see the proud smirk when he knows he's won, when he knows that he can't be beaten and no one can stop him.
He had no remorse in any of those moments, no compassion, no regret, there was only the pride and arrogance that comes with his belief that he had bested whomever attempted to challenge him.
Nothing about him is gentle, caring, or kind and nothing about him is anything like you.
You who'd never been in a fight your entire life, you who tried your hardest to make sure that no one ever felt what it was like to be alone as you had for so many years, you who always put others first, and you who tried to always find something kind to say about someone else.
Everything about your soulmate and who he is terrifies you, chills you to your core and wipes away the sensations that skittered along your skin and buried themselves in your heart moments ago.
He can't be mine. Not someone like him. Please no, anyone but him.
Your soulmate's head tilts to the side and his eyebrows furrow with confusion, mouth twitching into a frown, and you realize that he can feel your fear, maybe even hear it in the quick pulse of your heart or maybe he could smell it.
You weren't sure how his powers worked, all you knew was that you'd seen what he'd done with them, you’d seen the kind of person he was, and you wanted no part of that even if it meant being alone.
You'd spent your entire life waiting for this moment and now you wish it never came.
The cord between you snaps, the sound like breaking glass, but the man's emotions still remain in your head. You feel his confusion, his apprehension, and underneath it all you feel something else, something vulnerable that flicks away in an instant.
You step back from him, allowing his hands fall from your waist, prepared to run, needing to put as much distance between the two of you, but his fingers closes hard on your wrist just over his birthdate, hard enough to bruise.
I have to get of here.
"Where are you going?" He asks, his voice gruff, the sound of water over rocks, smoothing the sharp edges, answering your thought with a question.
"Please let me go." You say, unable to catch your breath and tugging at where his hand tightens around your wrist.
The feeling of his skin pressed to yours is overwhelming, begging you to curve into him, to sink into the warmth of your soulmate and never resurface for air.
But you can't. The fear is there, rising in the back of your throat, clamping down hard and stopping the rush of oxygen to your brain.
You weren't like Butcher, you didn’t hate supes, but you also weren't unrealistic or clueless about them. You didn't believe that all of them were bad, because with the bad came the good.
Your brother's soulmate Annie was proof of that, a supe that wasn't evil or callous or on a power trip to make others submit to her will. She cared for other people, used her powers to help others, but not all supes were like her.
Your brother had told you to stay away from supes like your soulmate, warned you about Homelander before he vanished, and warned you that not all supes were as they appeared. Although, Hughie had tried hard to keep his life separate from yours, Butcher believed you had a right to know that the supes who promised safety and freedom would be the first to take it away from you.
The stories Butcher had told you about Homelander kept you awake at night fearing for your brother and Annie’s safety, and your own. You knew that the new leader of the Seven, Stormfront, was just as bad, if not worse.
As much as you believed in the strength of your brother's soulmate, there was another part of you that knew she might not be a match for Stormfront, at least not on her own.
You yank your hand again trying to break his grip, but it doesn't move from Ben's grasp.
Why is she trying to leave?
Ben's voice in your head makes you hesitate, eyes widening as you look up into his face. You knew that Ben didn't say that out loud and yet you'd heard it. 
Holy shit, how can I hear his thoughts? Can he hear mine?
You weren't a supe and you didn't understand why you could hear his thoughts and feel his emotions, or why you hadn't been able to feel or hear them in the year since the two of you met.
What the fuck is going on? Ben's voice says louder in your head and you don't understand what the hell was going on. No one in history had ever been able to hear their soulmate's thoughts or their emotions, you knew that for a fact.
"Let me go!" You say louder.
All other sounds of whispered conversations and tinkling glasses have stopped as everyone in the room turns to stare at the two of you.
Your emotions were overwhelming, the part of you screaming to run away fighting with the urge to get closer to Ben.
His confusion floods into you as well as a slew of other emotions from him that you can’t put a name to. He doesn't understand why you're trying to get away from him and why he can feel your emotions either.
"But-" Ben begins to say.
You're my soulmate. His thought finishes in your head.
"Let her go." Hughie says appearing on your left.
The confused look in Ben's eyes shifts to annoyance, the green hardening within a second. "Fuck off. This isn't your problem." He snarls gaze flicking to your brother who looks closer to anger than you'd seen him in years.
Ben's anger and annoyance comes in a wave of heat, scorching up your arms and into your chest, clawing against your ribcage.
What the hell is happening?
"Oi let her go mate." Butcher's voice joins Hughie's and you can feel the presence of the other man hovering just over your shoulder.
Truthfully you liked Butcher. You thought he was funny and that he cared more about other people more than he was willing to let on. Not to mention after he lost his Soulmate, Becca, Butcher didn't have much to do, so you’d invite him over for movie nights with Annie and Hughie so you didn't feel like the awkward fourth wheel. Butcher was as much your friend as he was Hughie's.
I didn't fucking ask to butt in you British cunt. Ben's thought burns through your body with a wave of his anger and you can feel the heat of his skin raise.
Another shiver of fear courses down your spine at the thought of Ben losing control and burning you alive just as he had done to his teammates.
Ben's eyes drop back to yours when you whimper in pain, trying to free your wrist from his grasp, and this time Ben releases you.
The warmth you felt from touching his skin is gone, leaving only a dull throb in your wrist as you clutch it to your chest, eyes wide with fear and horror.
Ben's eyes drag down your body to your wrist and you can feel a flicker of something that might be guilt, but you're not sure if he can feel things like that. All you know is that you have to get away from him.
Why is she afraid of me?
Ben's thoughts are back, vibrating through your skull and bringing a wave of emotion with it that's not yours. You back away from him, but Ben takes a step forward to fill the space you left behind reaching for you again.
"Don't touch me." You whisper, throat thick. You couldn't tell what were his emotions and what were yours colliding in your head, all you knew was that you didn't want him anywhere near you.
Stay away from me! You think taking another step back. Ben tilts his head to the side in confusion.
He takes another step towards you still not comprehending what is happening, frustration and confusion burning through the air between the two of you.
You'd seen the short temper your soulmate had, saw what happened to people on the wrong side of it, and you cringe away from him in fear. You didn't want to be on the receiving end of his fist or whatever the hell he had locked away in his chest.
Please don’t hurt me.
The thought comes before you can stop it and you watch something flash in Ben’s eyes that looks surprisingly like hurt.
"What the fuck are you talking about?" Ben says, eyebrows furrowing together. “I’m your soulmate, I’d never hurt you.”
It confirms what you already know, that Ben can hear your thoughts just as you can hear his.
You back up into Butcher's chest and he drops his hands down on your shoulders to make you feel better.
Get your fucking hands off of her. She's mine!
Ben's voice roars in your head. The wave of jealousy and rage that you feel rip through your body at the feeling of Butcher's touch scorches against your insides.
"You should go." Hughie says calmly, but you can hear an edge to his voice.
"I'm not going fucking anywhere you overgrown glory hole!" Ben snaps, eyes flashing in the light of the sun behind you, the soft green long gone, but falling on you once more.
Why is she acting like she's not my soulmate? Like she doesn't want me?
Ben's voice asks in your head, the words snagging in something deep down that you thought you locked away years ago, the empty place inside that you longed for someone to fill, the empty place you knew that this man was supposed to belong.
No. No. No. Why is this happening to me?
"Hey, you don’t get to fucking speak to him like that in our house!" Annie shouts back at Ben, her eyes narrowed at the man who was at least two heads taller than she was.
It was all too much. You couldn't be here, not with all these people watching you. You move out of Butcher's grip and around Ben as close as you dare, trying to get to the front door and away from him. You could feel everyone's eyes on you and hear their silent judgement.
It reminded you too much of your childhood, the one you spent wishing that the whispers and odd looks would stop, the one when people would cross to the other side of the road like you had something contagious, the one where you felt so alone that you couldn't standing it and when you wished that someone, anyone, would fill the hole you felt inside for far too long. The same hole that you couldn't feel when Ben was touching you.
"Wait-" Ben begins to say, voice gruff, while trying again to grab you, but you dodge his hand and run full speed at the front door of the apartment.
Come back.
There's something behind those words that grates against your heart, but you don't turn around.
Hughie and Annie shout your name, but you're already gone. You can’t be here, not now, not with him standing there, not when he's everything you'd thought you'd never have and yet, everything that you fear.
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Your footsteps pound against the cracked pavement, the world around you a soundless blur with every pump of your arms. Rain swats against your skin as you run, each slap of your bare feet against cracked pavement mirroring the thunder that shakes the buildings around you.
You'd lost your shoes the minute you broke into a run outside Hughie and Annie's apartment, and you were too afraid to go back for them.
Water trickles down your spine, bringing the chill of the rain with it, but you can’t feel it, the only thing you feel is the flood of emotions you'd had since the moment you ran into your soulmate again, the one who left you on the street one year ago like you meant nothing to him. 
Funny, when that happened you thought that was the worst of it, but it wasn't.
What did I do to deserve this?
Flashes of your soulmate's memory echo the lightning above, the horrors you witnessed in the sweet abyss of sleep that haunted your mind. Bloody fists, blackened bodies, harsh laughter, and clips of dialogue play through your mind on a sickening loop.
You ran as if you thought you could leave it all behind, as if you could leave him behind, but he was everywhere. He was in the faces of the people in the crowds, in the sound of the thunder, in the thrum of your blood through your veins, in each beat of your heart, and in each breath you took.
The look he had on his face when you fled was there, bringing a wave of guilt for leaving him behind the way that he left you one year ago.
But he left me before he knew me. I know him. I've seen what he's done. I-
The thought brings the memory of the hurt that flashed through Ben's eyes at the apartment back into your head.
In all the memories you'd seen of him, you'd never seen him look hurt, but it was there somewhere, slipping through whatever warped telepathy the two of you had, the telepathy you didn't understand.
How could someone you waited for your whole life fill you with such dread? How could the man who was the other half of your soul, be anything like the man you met?
In the past you'd tried to imagine who it would be, what your soulmate would look like, how he'd treat you, and what kind of man he'd be. You'd seen a faceless man holding sunflowers out to you, a man holding you while you cried, a man sitting with you curled on the couch while you read through one of your favorite books with your head leaning on his shoulder, a man taking you to bed while your fingers clasped his above your head and the soft sound of his voice telling you how much he loved you, a man who touched you reverently, as if you were something to be worshipped, a man who made you feel safe and who would listen when you talked to him, a man who remembered the little things, a man who took care of you, and a man who sat with you while you graded papers and sighed to yourself at the end of a day that seemed endless.
Now it all seemed like a big lie, because your soulmate could never be that man. You'd seen exactly who and what he was.
The idea that you were cursed seemed to fit now, because there had to be something or someone above laughing at your expense, making you suffer all the years you were alone dreaming of a man who could be those things for you only to give you the one man who could be none of them.
Annie and Hughie were perfect in every way. All the little things that made each of them unique molded together to create something beautiful. They loved each other in a way that made your chest hurt to look at them.
You'd wanted that so badly for so long.
And now the stars laughed at you because they'd given you him.
You didn't think it would be possible for you to ever love someone like him. Someone who took from others and gave none in return, someone who found joy in the submission of others, and someone who hurt and killed with no remorse.
Monsters did that, men who thought the world owed them something or rather that the world should submit to them, men who took and took and never once cared what it did to the people around them, and men who never saw anyone else as an equal.
In the past you'd thought that your soulmate of all people would see you as something more than just a possession, but rather something that strengthened him, made him stronger with your love and care, made him a better man, and a man who saw you as someone, not something.
People clear out of your way, parting to watch what they must believe is a woman driven mad, running shoeless, down the streets of NYC in the middle of a torrential downpour.
And maybe you were crazy to run from someone who looked like your soulmate did.
There was no denying that he was gorgeous. He looked like he stepped right out of a book, the dashing dark-hared brooding hero with sharp features and green eyes you wished to lose yourself in. Your soulmate looked like every lead male character you'd imagined and fallen in love with in every book you ever read. The novels you read when everything in the real world was disappointing and bleak, the ones that opened their pages and welcomed you home, promised an escape from the mediocre and enveloped you in the extraordinary.
He looked like everything you ever wanted. Something taken from your unconscious and made real.
Why me?
The fear was back, the cold trickle that became a roar blocking out the little voice inside your head that scolded you and told you to turn around and go back to him, that you needed him, the little voice that told you he was yours, that he was made for you, just as you were made for him. The voice that promised after years of being alone and filled with a cold, empty feeling, all you had to do was turn around and run back to the sun.
But you can't go back, because you're not sure if your soulmate is even human anymore.
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In the past your bathtub had been a place of solace where you could have a nice glass of wine and lose yourself in a good book, but today the warm water did little to sooth the anxiety prickling on the back of your neck.
There was a Rosemary Mint candle lit on the small counter next to the sink sending a flickering yellow light over the worn subway tiles in your bathroom. One of two candles Annie had gifted you for Christmas in a handmade basket full of things to pamper yourself and a candle that was supposedly good for "stress relief" but you were prepared to call bullshit on that given the state of your nerves.
The plush white bathrobe hanging on the back of your bathroom door, the jar of soothing lavender bath salts nestled into the elbow of your tub, and the face masks scattered on the bathroom counter also came from the same basket.
All of which served as another reminder of how perfect she was for your thoughtful and caring brother.
The thought brings a wave of sadness over you and you lean your head into your knees.
None of this was helping.
You couldn't remember coming home, didn't remember running up the creaky stairs to your floor, didn’t remember passing by Mrs. Charleson's apartment with the happily painted yellow door, didn't remember unlocking the five locks on your apartment door, and certainly didn't remember slipping into the warm bath you found yourself in.
The only thing you could remember was meeting your soulmate, feeling the warmth of his caress over your skin, hearing the smooth rumble of his voice like distant thunder, and seeing how the memories you'd seen did not do justice to the handsome and rugged features he had.
A shiver of fear follows and your tighten your arms around your knees.
It wasn't supposed to be like this. He was supposed to be different.
You think to yourself as your eyes drift to the hand print on your wrist, the one that had already begun to turn an ugly blue and ironically was curved over the birthdate that glowed gold in the flickering light.
Why him?
A wave of guilt comes swiftly when you think of the way he looked at you when you thought that in front of him.
How could he hear my thoughts? How could I hear his thoughts and feel his emotions?
There were so many things about the soulmate bond the two of you had that made no sense. You knew for a fact that no one else could see their soulmates memories when they slept, but the ability to hear your soulmate's thoughts and feel his emotions? It was impossible. And unless someone had spiked your drink with compound V at the party, you still weren't a supe and had no idea what the hell was going on!
But you were thankful that you couldn't hear Ben's thoughts and emotions right now. You didn't know why that was and hoped it meant that it only happened when you were around him or hoped it meant that it would never happen again.
The memory of how you met Ben again sends a warm feeling from the top of your head to the tips of your toes. Another mystery… why it was like that to meet Ben the second time.
None of your friends ever told you that it was like that to run into your soulmate a second time.
Then again what other soulmate leaves you standing in the street alone?
The golden cord glows behind your eyelids, the cord that bound Ben's heart to yours for a few precious seconds, a moment that lasted forever. You'd never heard anyone talk about a golden cord before either. Annie said that when she met Hughie it felt like fireworks, but she never talked about feeling like she was bound to your brother or told you that it was anything like what you’d experienced with Ben.
What the hell is going on?
When you'd told Mrs. Charleson that you were dreaming Ben's memories she'd said that she'd heard a myth about it, that it meant the two of you were "meant to share more than one lifetime together," (whatever that meant), but she'd never mentioned anything about a cord that wove soulmates together. You would have gone to talk to her after the train wreck that happened at the party, but you knew that she was still at work.
Despite the fact that she had more than enough money to retire, your neighbor argued that people "who slowed down got old." She'd been running a successful apartment and house cleaning business for years, but about a year ago a man had hired her to clean his apartment and cook for him full time. He'd offered her so much money that your neighbor no longer needed to clean anyone else's home and was employed as his housekeeper.
You didn't know anything about him, didn't even know his name, but your neighbor said he was a kind young man who often reminded her of her son and was richer than a piece of french silk pie. You supposed he was a wall-street guy or the founder of some tech company, but you couldn’t believe the descriptions of his apartment she told you or the pictures you'd shown you.
It sounded and looked like a palace so far in the air it might as well be a castle in the sky, but you wanted to see it in person.
You did like your apartment, but it was too small even just for you. The thought of having a place where you could have a real desk, sunlight, consistent water pressure, a breathtaking view, and no super who only responded to twenty dollar bills and asked you for pictures of your feet daily sounded heavenly.
Not to mention it would be nice not to live somewhere with walls so thin you could hear your neighbors having obnoxiously loud sex at all hours of the night like bats. You had no idea how they ever got anything done with so little sleep.
And yeah, maybe Mrs. Charleson and you had made fun of the guy's decorating choices, but you figured that maybe he just needed someone to help him pick out furniture that was a little more comfortable to make his apartment seem less like a museum and more like a home. Mrs. Charleson had said he was single anyway, which meant that guy probably hadn't met his soulmate and when he did, they would help him out.
The front door of your apartment opens and fear momentarily spikes at the thought of it being your soulmate, that he'd somehow figured out where you lived, and he'd find you naked and vulnerable in the bathtub.
But then you hear your brother shout your name from your living room and a wave of relief crashes over you.
"I'm in the tub." You yell back.
Honestly, you didn't feel like talking to anyone, not after the day you had. You wanted to forget it happened, to go to bed and go to work tomorrow as if everything were normal and not as if your life was falling apart. It always felt like it was falling apart, but today was exceptionally heart breaking.
"Can you come out?" Hughie asks. You can hear him lean his head against the door of your small bathroom and you imagine his frown.
"I don't feel like talking right now." You reply pushing your face further into your knees.
"I brought tacos."
You hesitate for a second. Your brother and you had always been close. Sure there were those awkward sibling moments and a little bit of sibling rivalry and times when Hughie annoyed you to no end, but he was your best friend. It was him who encouraged you to become an English teacher despite the constant disapproval from your parents, him who loaned you enough money to get out from under their roof and start your own life, and him who always knew just the way to cheer you up… hence the tacos.
"And a blind date from Inky's Inspirations." He continues.
Damnit.
Inky's Inspirations was your favorite used book store. You had spent many a weekend curled up in one of the holey reading chairs with a worn paperback in your hand, letting the rest of the world fall away while you were lost in a book that whisked you away on ink and paper with gentle prose. The store had started doing "blind dates," wrapping up books in brown paper with descriptors like "Will melt your panties" or "Made me realize I have a bondage kink" or "Supernatural creature hunter vibes" or "In case you're curious about what the inside of the Loch Ness monster looked like."
That last one had been a supernatural romance that you still weren't sure if you liked it or not. It had been interesting...
But you were under the impression that no one could have too many books. The books scattered all over your apartment and stacked up so high they hit the ceiling were proof of that.
You sigh to yourself cursing your thoughtful brother. "Give me a second."
When you come out of your bathroom wearing your favorite soft t-shirt and sweatpants, your brother envelops you in a warm hug, and unfortunately undoes the little relaxation you felt when you took a bath and makes you begin to cry.
Worse was that a little part of you wished that it wasn't your brother but your soulmate who was here holding you, or rather the version of the soulmate you'd invented in your head, not the man you’d seen earlier.
It made all of this worse, that you were still so alone and sometimes you couldn’t understand how you could feel so alone with so many people in your life who cared about you. But you wanted him, wanted the other half of your soul to hold you close against him, to feel the warmth of his body curving around yours as he told you that everything was going to be okay.
It hurt more than you knew it would, especially now that you knew he existed.
Sobs shake through your body as you cling to your brother and rub your nose into the front of his shirt as everything from today washes over you all over again. Meeting your soulmate again after a year, having all those feeling and emotions roll through you, seeing flashes of his memories again, and running away from him as fast as you could.
You felt lost and yet there was a voice whispering in your ear that told you that the only place that you could be found was back with the man who held the other half of your soul.
"Shh. It's alright." Hughie soothes, rubbing his hand up and down your back. "It's okay."
It was the same thing that he used to tell you when you were younger and nothing made sense, when it felt like you were a freak because of the date printed on your wrist.  The same days when you'd ask yourself the ultimate question: would it be okay?
But now you knew the truth… it wouldn't be.
Because you'd hoped and prayed to meet your soulmate every day of your life, and now that you had, you wished that it never happened, because the man who grabbed you so hard it bruised your skin couldn't be the man you imagined falling in love with when you were a little girl.
"Are you okay?" Hughie asks you.
"No." You murmur pulling back to clean your tear smudged glasses.
Hughie was still wearing the light blue button down shirt from the party, and you feel a wave of guilt crash over you thinking that you ruined his and Annie's housewarming party.
Your brother presses his lips together. "I'm sorry-" He begins to say, but you interrupt.
"I'm the one who should be saying that."
"What? Why?"
"Well I ruined your party and-"
"Are you kidding? No you didn't! That asshole did-" Hughie frowns. "I don't know what he was thinking grabbing you like that."
You swallow the lump in the back of your throat remembering the grip Ben had on your arm.
"Did he hurt you?" Hughie picks up your hand to examine your wrist, frowning at the handprint. "What a dick!"
Your brother didn’t usually get angry, he was more of a suffer in silence kind of person who kept all their emotions a little more close to their chest, but he looks livid. "I swear the next time I see him I'm going to give him a piece of my mind. He shouldn’t have fucking grabbed you like that-"
The thought of your gentle brother yelling at Ben makes a lump of worry catch in the back of your throat. You didn't want Ben to hurt your brother, he was only person in your entire family that made you feel like you belonged.
"Hughie calm down, it's okay."
It wasn't and you both knew it.
"No it's not. He could have broken your arm!" He snaps.
"He didn't." You murmur.
But he could have.
Those words are like taking a bullet to the chest. You’d seen exactly what your soulmate was capable of and exactly how he acted when he didn’t get his way.
What did I do to deserve this?
"That doesn't matter! He didn't have a right to treat you like that. Like you're-"
"His." The word comes out before you can stop it. "But I kind of am." You shudder at the confession.
Even if you didn't want Ben in your life, it didn't change anything. He was still your soulmate. Every part of him was molded and shaped for you just as every part of yourself was molded and shaped for him.
Ben was yours, but you didn't want to be his.
Hughie shakes his head. "He might be your soulmate but you don't belong to him. You're not his property-"
"I know that but-" Your voice breaks under the weight of everything crashing back down over you. "How can he be my soulmate?"
Hughie whispers your name, but you keep talking. It was coming out of you, everything that you had pushed down, all the emotions you'd had as a child, because you didn't want to keep going like everything was fine, it wasn't.
It never had been.
"Why is he my soulmate? How are we anything alike? He's-" A memory of Ben ripping someone in half comes across your mind and it makes you feel nauseous.
"I mean I-" The tears were coming fast again now, hot against your cheeks. "I waited all these years, thought that he'd never exist, thought that I was going fucking crazy staring at this damn date on my wrist and after years of feeling like a freak I find out that the man I've been waiting for is him? How is any of this fair?"
"It's going to be-"
"Stop saying that!" You shout, hands clenched at your sides. "It's not Hughie! It's not going to be okay and I'm so sick of hearing you say it. Not everyone can be happy all the time and have a perfect soulmate. Some of us are fucking stuck with a barbarian who doesn't give a shit about anyone else and kills people for sport!"
Hughie recoils with your words and you feel guilty.
You didn’t mean to hurt his feelings and you knew that your brother was here to help you, but you were just so frustrated and confused over everything that had happened today. You had no idea what was going on and what any of this meant. It all made you feel helpless and you hated feeling like that.
"He's-" You squeeze your eyes shut as if it'll make the thoughts stop, but it doesn't. "He's nothing like me! He's-" The image of a body laying at Ben's feet comes flashing through your head with him standing triumphantly over it. "He's a monster."
You hadn't said it out loud until right now only thought it. The word seems harsh, but you didn't know what else to call a person who killed and hurt other people with no remorse. In all the memories that you’d relived of your soulmate that was the ingredient missing.
Remorse.
Regret.
Guilt.
Shame.
All were things that would have made you reconsider going back to Ben if he'd felt those things after killing or hurting someone, but you didn't feel a shred of any when you watched him tear people apart with his bare hands.
You wonder if it had something to do with being tortured in the lab all those years, if being put through that changed him, but you’d seen memories of him acting just as terrible years before that happened.
"Someone like him isn't capable of feeling love! You can't do all the things he has with no remorse and still be capable of that." By now you were babbling, your voice barely recognizable from the sobs and shaky breaths you kept taking to stabilize yourself, but the truth was you were on the verge of a panic attack. Your eyes shift to your brother's concerned expression. "I'm sorry Hughie I-"
Hughie hugs you again, holding you so tight against him that it hurts. “You don’t have to be sorry. I know you’re frustrated. And I don't understand why he's your soulmate either. You have no idea what I’ve seen him do.“
“I don't know what to do.” You whisper into his shirt with a sniffle, still trying to calm the rapid breathing and beat of your heart, but nothing was working.
Because what the hell should you do?
You'd lived so long believing that you’d never meet your soulmate and even though the thought of being around him terrified you, there was another part of you that was begging you to go back to him.
The fantasy version of Ben manifests again, the one you'd imagined when you were a little girl dreaming of the day you'd get to meet the man who would complete you. Now those fantasies mocked you, every year you spent celebrating the birthday of your soulmate alone in the darkness of your apartment, every minute you spent trying to shrug off the taunts of the people in your hometown and your own parents when they saw the date on your wrist, and every second you spent hoping that it would happen to you while a little voice in your head told you it wasn't meant to be, that someone above cursed you to be alone forever.
All the hope you'd felt was a lie.
“It wasn’t supposed to be like this and now that I’ve seen what he’s done I… I don't think I could ever love someone like him."
"No one is asking you to." Your brother says.
"I know that, but- He's still my soulmate."
I want to love him. A little voice deep inside said, it was the same one that was begging you to give Ben a chance, but you ignored it. You had seen the kind of man he was and you wanted no part of him in your life.
You take in a shaky breath and pull back from Hughie to examine the handprint shaped bruise on your wrist right over the golden birthdate that glows against your skin. "I'd rather be alone than be with him.”
The words hurt to admit to yourself, especially after all the years you’d spent wishing that you wouldn’t be alone and watching everyone else get the happy ending you so desperately wanted.
But none of that mattered now. Soulmate or not, everything about Ben scared you, and it didn't matter that the universe said he was yours, you knew in your heart that he couldn't be and that you'd never be able to love someone like him.
And miles away, on the other side of the bustling city that never sleeps, your soulmate sat on the end of his large bed in his empty apartment and looked down at his own wrist, tracing an ugly blue bruise that looked surprisingly like a handprint over your golden birthdate, and the first bruise he'd had in over eighty years.
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A/N: Welp, I told y'all it was sad and oh my stars it broke my heart to do this to Ben. 😭 I'd like to say that the next chapter I have planned is less sad... but oh man I think it's worse 😅
As always thank you so much for reading! Reblogs, comments, and likes are not required, but are always welcome and appreciated! I really love hearing what y'all think. ❤️ If you'd liked to be added to the taglist for this series please let me know :)
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204 notes ¡ View notes
hoseoksluna ¡ 11 months ago
Text
CHERRIES | jhs ft. jjk
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pairing: soon-to-be-boyfriend!hobi x oc (feat. ex-boyfriend!jk)
genre: heavy, heavy, obnoxious smut
word count: 12.7k
summary: you don't know how he does it, but hobi makes you forget about the life you led before him, using his tongue.
playlist: hobi's playlist ; hobi's the weeknd playlist 
pinterest board: cherries / taglist: join
warnings: oh my god—dd/lg but differently, businessman!hobi, dominant and emotional and fucking possessive hobi, oc is horny... a lot, praise kink, breeding kink sdflhldghfdklaxjkfghskfg, oral sex (f. receiving), fingering, female and male masturbation, use of a sex toy, cum eating, ass eating, religious personification, mentions of anal sex, thigh and ass slapping fuck
note: my babies, i'm so happy to be posting PART TWO OF BERRIES for you, oh my god. i had the time of my LIFE writing this, had to take breaks every 20 mins, was horny beyond my fucking mind BECAUSE THE SMUT IN THIS? FUCK. THIS IS PURE FILTH. 12K WORDS OF FILTHY HOBI SMUT. IM DEAD. HAVE BEEN DEAD. i missed writing so much that i spewed this out in 3 days... literally how? but i'm so happy to be back. i hope you enjoy this part. make sure to let me know what you think! i'm in a severe (hehe) need of your feedback. I LOVE YOU, MY BABIES. MWAH.
side note: this part has the entirety of my being in it. from the first word to the last. it means a lot to me. very special chapter! <3
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By the time you come out of the art museum, it’s storming. A sound so cacophonous that it spreads dots of gooseflesh along the perimeter of your skin underneath your silk dress and the layer of your heavy trench coat. Loud and violent like your heart’s deep drum that stills once you see Hoseok leaning against his glossy car. Arms and legs crossed in the same fashion, clothed in the coupled shade of blackness, a mop of tousled hair swept back and rippling in the unforgiving wind that flushes his cheeks with its rosy coldness and then clouds pull in, darkening his stare fixed on you. 
A shower of sudden rain finishes its touch on his countenance. 
Eye contact broken, Hobi’s shoulders raise as he feels the iciness of the slender raindrops falling upon him, eyes flicked up to the shadowed heavens. A heartstring of yours snaps and you don’t really know who gave the command to your aching legs to run towards him with your coat suspended over your head—whether it was that weakened heart of yours or basic human decency. Emotion versus logic. 
You find soon enough the verdict of the winner. 
Because when you have to stand on your tippy toes to cover him from the rain, despite the fact you’re wearing your high-heeled boots, and Hobi takes the makeshift shield from your hands and shrouds you both from the wetness, an identical flush crawls from your left cheek, upon the column of your nose right next to your other cheek, warming you up from within. 
Emotion. The string that ruptured grows again to its full length during that fleeting moment and you’re aching to take him home. 
No rain in sight—just him in this close proximity, in this gray cocoon, smiling down at you lopsidedly, a dimmed light flickering in his inky pools, faintly, barely, only there for you to see. To catch and cling to like his patchouli scent does to you, a whiff of dainty wildflowers leaning in and enclosing around you, forcing away the thoughts that are erect in the corners of your mind, waiting for the adequate moment to strike. Thoughts of how you sense Jungkook’s life entwining around your world again; his companion perfuming the air with petrichor, the inner turmoil she must be facing the very strength that pulled those clouds in, causing a storm to stretch across the skies. You figure each beat of her confused heart must be the grumble of the thunder, but then Hobi’s outer film of softness amidst the darkness is a force way greater, because firmness broods right underneath it, and it is an energy that keeps those thoughts pressed against the walls of your mind.
He did turn you into a locked orchard—and the threat of another declared war isn’t even a wind that brushes past your fruit trees and berry bushes. 
In fact, the more you deepen your exchange of gazes and Hobi cages you in between his shirt-clothed elbows, the more you want to show him the stain of your juices upon your panties. 
You’re aroused—blooming, in need to be picked. It outweighs the past and you’re glad for it, deem your newly born sexuality more important than the doomed normalcy of your life. 
You sink your manicured nails into that newness, adamant on not letting it go, regretting that you agreed to see your ex-boyfriend later tonight, regretting that you grew soft at the hint of his own normalcy, even though you said to yourself that you wouldn’t. It’s one of the reasons why you dig your nails deeper, maximizing your closeness to Hobi—it’s done in an effort to erase your foolish moment of weakness, to better yourself like you encouraged yourself to do earlier when you had perceived that you misinterpreted him. You curl your lips under your teeth to stifle back a sigh, wishing you were as firm as him, as stable in your decisions and your way of living as him. Wishing your weakness wasn’t a putty you play with, leave your fingerprints of your bad decisions on that blemish until you hate yourself, until the paste hardens and there’s nothing left for you to do but to watch it. Watch the evidence of your failure, your brokenness and your imbecility like still life—the curse, the doom of your life, haunting you. 
It almost slinks in, threatening yet again to desiccate your orchard, the movement akin to a wave rolling in, but then Hobi speaks. And his voice sears those thoughts to nothing. Not even their shadows are left behind. 
“Did you say hi to your friend?” he murmurs, reaching behind him to open the door of the passenger side for you, the coat that’s propped on his forearm lowering until it rests back around your shoulders. 
You can merely nod, your empty mind focused on the absence of your selfishness—for once again, you want to be close to him for his sake, even more so when Hobi places his palm on the top edge of his car so you don’t hurt your head. 
A prince, an orchardist, and a gentleman. 
You’re feeding him and sucking his dick before he goes to work—you don’t care. Hope to God he fucks your brain out of your head and plants a new one; one that isn’t so stupid. 
Seated inside his car, you glimpse profoundly at the way the rain kisses the crown of his head as he rounds his vehicle, sitting right beside you and carrying inside his heavenly skin fragrance, now accentuated by the residue of petrichor that all of a sudden doesn’t have anything to do with what you just bore. No hints, no thoughts, no wars. How he does it is something you’ll never have the capability of understanding—a fracture of attention of the intimate kind and he binds you to him, erasing your still fresh past as if it never happened. 
You flex and relax your hand on your lap, a gesture that depicts that you cherish it to the point that you yearn to submit to it and remain submitted. And you will. You’ll figure out a way to stay stable, even if events appear to try and revolutionize you. A way to keep your fist clenched in his presence. 
Hobi lets the car warm up a little bit before he turns on the heating, angling his rear view mirror just right, from which two purple, plush dice swing back and forth, colliding once and never meeting again. 
How inspiring. 
And then you watch his hands. Watch them dominate the car, spur it to life as he drives through the drenched street, parting the rain like a curtain, stepping in, taking you home. 
As if he sensed your thoughts, he glances at you. “My place or yours?” 
A red light halts his control and Hobi uses it to tap on the screen of his dashboard, dousing the space in a sultry, wet ambiance as slow, calm music breaks the silence. While it was comfortable for you, now you feel even more at ease and you wiggle in your seat, sinking deeper into the leather. 
Quite useful material for the lecherous saturation of your mind; for the lustful layer of sweat lining your skin. You feel so hot. Feel the need to be ridded of your clothes right now. Feel a certain kind of vivacity that drives you to do things you wouldn’t normally do. 
You take his hand from the shift stick, cradling it with both of your own hands, a finger tracing the veins that paint a slender but a strong temple—a temple for his beauty and character, you suspect. 
“My place,” you say, yearning to make him feel at home in your space; cook for him, make him come, stuff like that.
Green light blinks and Hobi doesn’t withdraw from your hold. No, he tells you what to do, quickly. 
“Keep your hand on mine,” he instructs and you listen, sinking your fingers between his and gripping him like in an effort to grip onto stable submission. “Just like that.” 
Your stomach flips at his choice of praise and you lick your lips, tightening your hold hard enough that he peeks at you with a smirk while he shifts the gear stick with you and speeds down the road. The heat worsens and you don’t think you can take it anymore.
That alone is the most attractive thing you ever experienced with a man. 
And when he plays with your thumb, you can’t help but to squeeze your thighs together. Watch him intently sneak a glance as you do so, knowing your dress has ridden up a little, exposing your tanned thighs, swathed with the brown leather of your boots. Your position also provides him the intriguing reveal of a secret—you’re wearing knee socks underneath. They were invisible to his sight this whole time and now that he sees them, his eyes linger there for a few seconds longer before he drags his teeth along his bottom lip, flicking his gaze back to the road. 
“You’re wearing knee socks under those?” he asks, his voice low and tortured. Doesn’t look at you as he does. Only shifts the gear stick again, stiffly. You imagine something else is stiff, too, and you smile, a tendril of confidence clothing you in allure and sinful, dark joy. It beckons your vivacity to drive forward. 
You move his hand to let the pads of his fingers feel the smooth fabric. His body twitches, his lungs inhaling a short, soft air, mouth parted, eyes unblinking, gloomy just like the heavens above. A thunder sounds and you feel like roaring just the same. 
“It matches my underwear,” you murmur and the thunder prolongs, echoing feebly. You drag his hand down your thigh with the intention to also make him feel the nylon material of your panties, but he halts your movement halfway, hand gripping your flesh, trembling ever so slightly, stirring your confidence. You almost moan at his brusqueness. 
“Don’t,” he scolds, brows furrowing, chest heaving in that slow manner. His lips dry and he wets them. Doesn’t spare you a glance. Turns the wheel with that one hand as he takes a left turn, his posture slouched, thighs spread, a small tent evident in between. His arousal for you grows and it only propels you to finish the job, knowing his scolding was merely a warning, not a portrayal of his discomfort. And he proves you right with his next words. “If you do that, I’ll crash this fucking car.” 
You laugh through your nose, your confidence and your own arousal fluttering in you, begging to be let out. Your favorite artist starts playing and you’re not surprised by the way your body reacts. Your thighs naturally spread and you move your pelvis forward. Feel your slick dampening your panties even more, trickling down your needy seashell just as The Weeknd begins to sing about your desire. 
“I wanna fuck you slow with the lights on…” 
You lick your lips, inhaling deeply and exhaling with a soft moan. Hobi digs his fingernails into your skin, coaxing another one out of you and he calls you by your name in a sterner warning. You caress the edge of his hand with the thought in mind that you’ve always loved the crescent moon, so it would only be illogical for you to not want more of it imprinted on your skin. 
“You shouldn’t praise me then,” you croak out, doused in adrenaline-tinged lust, your sweat heavy upon you. You clutch your cherub necklace, needing to be touched, a habit of yours that you’ve had ever since you were a teenage girl. Your fingers graze your collarbones, lingering in the dip between them. “Besides, you’re such a good driver that I think you can handle it.” 
Hobi hums out an endearing laugh, that smirk of his reappearing on his mouth. He rubs the moons he impressed into your thigh from side to side and your hips buck, asking for that movement down low where you need him the most. 
“You have a praise kink?” he questions and you catch him bite his lip, catch him enjoying that information, sinking it into his flesh. You want to kiss it, bruise it, make it permanent for a little while. You revel in such a dirty, yet gentle conversation and you stop yourself from bucking your hips again. 
“A severe praise kink,” you correct him, emphasizing the adjective with a bit of a bratty tone to divulge to him what he does to you and how much he needs to pay for it. And before you can go on, he catches you off guard. 
“If you want me to keep praising you then rub your clit,” he negotiates with you, taking your hand and moving the gear stick, leaving it there. “And you’re wrong. I can’t handle you like this. I can’t touch you when I’m responsible for your life.” 
Daddy. The title would’ve slipped out of the tip of your tongue had a moan not been first, coating the ambience with a sultriness that makes you tug at his hand in order to do as he says, in order to be praised, to be gratified. But Hobi doesn’t budge. He tightens his grip around the shift stick, clicking his tongue. 
“No, baby. With your other hand,” he orders, his breath shaking and amidst the enveloping of his fatherliness around you, strengthening you and binding you with ropes of safety, girlishness and seductiveness, you scrunch up your brows, wanting his hand to be there when you make yourself feel good. 
And you tell him. 
“I want you to help me.” 
The rain thickens, creating a sensual background noise to the next slow song playing and Hobi sighs, disliking your attitude. Your arousal grows to highs you’ve never seen before, a sweet, pleasing darkness consuming you, sprinkling you with glitters of appetite and craze. 
All because your sexual chemistry is so good, so strong—so natural, despite the fact you just met and don’t know each other enough for it to be possible. It exceeds the laws of human connection and the feeling of it is heady, intoxicating you with wine of the ripest cherries. You even feel as though this is your first alcoholic drink. Feel as though you’re an unspoiled virgin on the cusp of her very first sin—the Virgin Mary with long hair, cherub necklace, tanned skin, knee socks and high-heeled boots. 
Hobi erases your past life. Paints a new one with watercolors; paints you anew. You know the dulcet taste of fatherliness and manliness from Jungkook and while it was what you needed at the time, sexually that is—as it wasn’t often that he used this kind of energy day-to-day, and if he did, it was to tease you—what Hobi does runs deeper. It surpasses your need; it’s not a filling that will decompose soon enough and ask for it again. It’s something else entirely. 
It’s something that falls upon you and stays. Clicks and connects with no way out. It’s another layer of skin, strands of hair growing out of your scalp, the drum of the vein upon your neck. 
It began in the museum and uncoils here. It’s not worth it to juxtapose it with what you had before—it’s laughable to do so. Hobi has established his fatherliness the moment he held your coat as a heathen in a church, not taking his gaze off of your intimate prayers for even a split second. Unkinked it with his honesty and by expressing his responsibility over you, listening to the murmur of the sea of your sexual need but not diving head-first into it, knowing better. And now it is ready to bloom with flowerets, with fruits, with leaves to accompany you. 
“It’s this or nothing,” Hobi decides, squeezing his fingers against yours to also emphasize the gravity of his words and you purse your lips in response, finding the ultimatum so attractive. “You live thirty minutes away, so you either rub your clit on your own or you wait. It’s up to you.” 
It’s mind blowing to you how he went from being timid to now ordering you to pleasure yourself. You’re sweltering beneath your clothes and Hobi notices, looking at your body through his rear view mirror. He turns the heating up and you laugh, blush deepening, eyes crinkling at the corners. Your heart thuds heavily in your chest. 
“Why didn’t you put your seatbelt on?” he mutters, letting go of your hand and giving you a mean look that makes your walls clench and your throat let out a low, almost soundless moan. 
You never put a seatbelt on. As dangerous as it, you hate the way it chokes you due to your small stature and you tell him. “It chokes me, Hobi, I don’t really like it.” 
Hobi doesn’t respond. He reaches over and drags down the seatbelt adjuster without taking his eyes off of the road, driving steadily. His patchouli scent hits your nostrils and you nuzzle your nose into his bicep, fingers curling around his arm, smelling him in a simple, comfortable manner. Hobi gives you a quick smile and you hear the sound of him pulling on the seatbelt, but then a pedestrian runs across the previously empty crosswalk, forcing him to stomp on the brake abruptly and your heart nearly skips out of your chest. Almost flying forward, Hobi holds you in place with his strong arm, which you cradle against your quickening chest. 
Exchanging a look, you both pant in tandem and Hobi shakes his head at you. Panic lines his dark eyelashes and he immediately grabs the seatbelt and, tugging harshly, he sinks it into the buckle, placing the belt behind your back. He doesn’t acknowledge the pedestrian lifting his palm in apology and neither do you, too preoccupied with the fact he just saved your life. 
“You wear a seatbelt in my car. No buts. Understand?” 
Too shocked by the twist of events and too touched by the gesture and the sternness of his words, you nod. He pats your thigh, the one he marked, fondling the skin with his thumb, and it drives you to say something. “I’m sorry, Hobi. I’ll wear the seatbelt from now on.” 
You mean it. This has never happened to you before as you usually take the public transport, but you do understand now how dangerous it is to not wear one. Your heartbeat calms and the aftershocks of the adrenaline come to the surface, scattering along your figure. Numbness melts and your arousal returns at full speed. 
Hobi nods, smiling gently, pleased with your apology, and you feel so peculiarly gratified that you managed to do something like that to him. He sinks his fingers under your thigh and you marvel at the size of his hand because his thumb still remains there on the top of the flesh, even as he wraps his digits around you like that. Kneading just once before he lifts them and begins to tap on his screen again, shifting the energy with the voice of your favorite artist. He moves the gear, accelerating. 
“Why you rushing me, baby? It’s only us, alone,” The Weeknd sings and you sigh, your body loosening up. You hike the seatbelt around your hips higher, curling lower on the leather, thighs parting until your knee taps his hand. You miss his touch and you long for it again, finding its warm ghost on your skin not enough. 
“You like The Weeknd, don’t you?” Hobi says, his pinky finger brushing along your sock-clad knee, causing you to almost twitch. 
You smile, relishing in the love you have for the singer. “I’ve spent ten years of my life loving him.” 
Liking your answer, Hobi skims his fingers along the side of your inner thigh until he finds yours, intertwining them—this time his palm closed over the back of your hand, placing it to its former position on the stick. It’s warmed by him and you love it so much that you search for his thumb, playing with it. 
“I could tell,” he breathes, his tone deepened by a heartfelt emotion that moves through you. You raise your brows in curiosity and question, wondering how that has come to be. Glancing at you to see your reaction, Hobi laughs softly, his heart evident in the sound, coated with it entirely, and you catch his thumb, holding it, on the verge of bursting. “I saw what you did when I put him on.” 
You round the tip of your tongue along your top lip, recollecting well what you did when you heard him. “What did I do?” 
A beat of silence between you and him, he lets the singer sing his elegy. Then, his index finger traces your manicured nail on the same digit. “You spread your legs. Made such a pretty sound that I almost stopped this fucking car and fucked you until the whole city could heard it.” 
Your breath hitches in your throat and you’re too late to halt the moan from slipping out, a fire coursing down from the top of your head to your toes. You want a taste of his desire so bad that you’ll do anything for it. Even let the seatbelt choke you to death. 
Hobi gives you a look, one that chills your blood this time. But it feels absolutely exhilarating.
He calls your name. “Don’t do that to me. Not here.” 
Your breath trembles as you scurry to regain your composure, sliding up in your seat. Hobi, too, stops that movement by cradling your thigh, putting it back to the stick once you get the message. 
Why does this feel better than if he gave in? 
“What if I want to?” you challenge and Hobi rubs his eyes, slapping his hand back onto the steering wheel. Frustration, it looks so good on him. “What if I want you to fuck me here?” 
He shakes his head, just once, biting his lip, reddening the pillow. “No, I don’t share.” 
Fuck. 
This is a point of no return. You will never be the same after what he said and you feel your attachment melting into his chest, dissolving there into leaves from your fruit trees. Your imaginary wings flit, aroused from his possessiveness. 
“You know what to do,” he adds without looking at you, turning up the volume as if to subdue your incoming moans. 
A cherry on the top of the fucking cake. 
You don’t waste a precious second. Lifting the hem of your dress, you expose your drenched panties, a large wet spot in the center darkening the black fabric. Hobi doesn’t spare you a glance. No, he takes your intertwined hands and fixes his rear view mirror, tipping it down. Dangerous, but smart. Responsible. 
It’s those glimmering flecks of his character that drive your fingers to pull your panties to the side, but Hobi, once again, stops you. 
With words, this time. 
“Do you want me to die?” he rasps, tortured—horribly tortured and you cup your femininity, coaxing a groan out of him. “Do it over your panties, baby. Please.” 
He begged. You don’t think you ever heard that word come out of a man’s mouth in your life and you break, whimpering, pulling your panties back in their place over your pussy, dragging the tip of your middle finger up and down your dripping slit, sighing. Adding your index, you put pressure to the sides of your clit as you slide your digits in the same direction, over and over, teasing yourself, breathing out little moans that make him grip the steering wheel until his knuckles turn white. 
Hobi glances once at what you’re doing and swears. “Fuck, rub your clit. Don’t tease yourself, baby. Make yourself feel good.” 
With a mewl, you stick your fingers together and begin a series of circles, doing as he says. Your eyes roll back, head knocking back into the leather, satisfaction seizing your body and sweetening it. The material of your panties is so flimsy that it feels as though your fingers are stroking your bare flesh and when you tug the fabric to your hole to wet it and rub your clit harder, your moans gain volume, mingling with The Weeknd’s poetry seamlessly and magnificently, dethroning the rain. 
And then Hobi shifts the gear stick with your hand and drives so fast that your pleasure deepens, thrill rushing in your veins. You match your circles to that speed, your sounds becoming obnoxious, whiny squeaks when you look at him to see his jaw clenched, chest heaving and the tent in his pants larger than you last checked it. 
Hobi skims his fingers along your forearm, back and forth, cradling it. Senses your stare and reciprocates it, catching you at your best when you find your spot and buck your hips, furrowing your brows. He moans, clutching your thigh. 
“So good. Such a good girl, rubbing her clit for me to get praised. Fuck, baby. You’re doing so good.” 
You lift your fingers in order not to come, the aftershocks of your ripped away orgasm quivering throughout your whole body and you squeeze his hand, letting go—wrapping it around his tent, instead. You figure he deserves it for praising you like that. 
He finds your lidded, mischievous eyes in the rear view mirror and he flattens his lips, a brutal expression on his face that should make you scared, but it doesn’t. It only spurs you on. You graze your palm on him, causing his breath to quicken, and you whimper when you search and search for the tip of his cock. He’s slender, but big and your mouth dries. 
“You almost made me come with what you said,” you say, truthfully, retracing your path down his length, his breath, now hardened, wafting over you. You love the way he focuses on the road with every fiber of his being as you’re toying with him. Love watching him grit his teeth, narrow his eyes; love watching sweat adorn his flushed chest and neck. You ache to bite him there. 
And you would—had he not buckled you in place. 
You don’t notice you’ve arrived at your apartment until he stops the car and turns to face you, leaning his elbow on the center console. Nobody could gaslight you into believing that ride took thirty minutes. Nobody. 
Hobi made that fifteen. Ferally. For you. 
You can see it in his shining face—his need for you, his desire, the fact he sped down the road because you’re so horny. And you ache to kiss him. 
“You really do have a praise kink,” he says, mutedly. Must be thinking the same because his gaze flicks to your lips. You lick them for him, encouraging him to do it. “Almost coming from me praising you. Such a good girl.” 
You hiss, the drum in your clit returning, stealing your attention. Hoseok grins, pleased to be proven right, pleased that you make it so easy for him. You squeeze his length and he makes the same sound, gritting his teeth briefly before he pouts. 
“What’s this?” he asks, speaking of your hand placement. “When did I allow you to do this?” 
You breathe heavily, descending your fingers to his full balls, feeling them perfectly due to the silky fabric of his dress pants. You knead them and he moans, the sound traveling right to your yet again needy bundle of nerves. Your hand automatically flies to it, rubbing it, and Hobi curses, eyes narrowing, fixed on the movement of your fingers. 
“It’s asking for me, isn’t it?” you murmur, sliding your hand back to his manhood and his pools almost go cross, head tilting back. Your pleasure from your motions expands, your nerve endings burning. 
“I’m so hard for you,” he agrees, his hand clasping over yours, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows with great difficulty, the column of his throat such a thing of beauty for you that it forces you to unclip your seatbelt. You’re about to crawl onto his lap, but one darkened look from him makes you decide against it. “Show me that pussy, baby.” 
Your moan has a certain elation to it, giddy at the fact you get to expose such an intimate part of you to him, giddy that he’s taking this to another level. 
You slide your drenched panties to the side and at the sight of your glistening pussy Hobi groans deeply.
“Lean against the door,” he commands, wiping at his mouth and you tremble all over, more than delighted that he’s reacting to you this way. 
You swivel, propping your back against the leather of his door and Hobi lifts your legs, spreading them. You hook one of them around the back of his headrest while the other dangles in his hold. His gaze zeroes in on your pussy and as he bites his lip, he acknowledges himself with her by tracing the flesh with his thumb. Your clit, your lips before he circles your gushing hole, groaning, bettering the song you barely can hear. Your confidence and your allure skyrockets and you follow his digit, riding it, begging for more of his touch. He plays chase with you until both of you and him can’t take it anymore and when his thumb is completely soaked, he lifts it to your mouth—only to fuck with you, though, because he plunges it inside his, leaving your own parted for nothing. 
You’re embarrassed, but he likes it. Whimpers around his finger. Pushes your knee to your shoulders and dives right in. 
You yelp, grabbing a hold of his hair as he licks over your clit, closing his lips over it and sucking until your eyes roll back, until all your still parted mouth knows is his name and your thick heel digs into his shoulder. 
But you moan the wrong variation and he’s quick to correct you with a dripping chin, his hands on either side of you, face merely inches away from yours. “That’s Hoseok for you, not Hobi.” 
Red all over, you can only moan in response, gripping his hair until he hisses in pain. He strums your clit without breaking eye contact, so slippery and swollen from his attack. The orchard in you grows, brims with fruit that is on the cusp of bursting, the berries in you big and full. His eyes narrow furthermore, pupils dilated, causing his gaze to darken in ways you’ve never thought could be possible. 
“Moan my name, baby. Show me how good I’m making you feel.” 
The wrong variation slips again, all due to the mind numbing pleasure he’s giving you. He adds more pressure to his fingers for a second before he withdraws and slaps your thigh. And slaps it again. 
“I can’t praise you if you don’t learn well, can I?” he mutters and you whine so loudly that his eyes round, body growing boneless. “Fuck, baby, if you keep making sounds like that I’m gonna come in my pants.” 
You scramble your words, find it the most difficult thing in the world. And he doesn’t help you. Not when he sinks a long finger inside your heat, fucking you slowly until you can take him. You lose your mind altogether. 
“You’re making me feel too-too good,” you breathe out, hiccuping as he adds a second finger in, silencing you when he gives you long strokes. You follow his gaze down and perceive that he’s watching you soak his digits. He twists them, moaning, a litany of mad, mad curses falling out of his mouth in a hushed tone. 
“So wet just from me praising you, oh my God,” Hobi comments and you squeeze your eyes shut, taking it as he begins to pound you to the hilt, his arm bulging, his whole body moving. “Eyes on me. What do you call me when I make you feel this good, hm? I already told you. Just remember.” 
You know which variation he means and wants to hear, but your tongue curls, aching to utter a different name that he deserves to be called by. 
And you say it, opening your eyes and boring them into his. “Daddy.” 
And you don’t stop saying it. Not when he closes his eyes for a split second, agonized by such saccharinity. Not when he undoes the button of his pants and pulls himself out while thumbing your clit. You gasp, legs quivering, what you touched brought to reality and your orgasm nears, especially when he fist-fucks his length. 
Hoseok draws back down to your clit, licking it over, nuzzling his face in it as he drinks your nectar right from the source, his wet fingers from you making squeaky sounds around his girth, causing you to scream, the intensity of the moment running so deep and you’re too weak to take it, overwhelmed by his arousal. 
He lifts his head for a moment. “I want you to call me Daddy when you come on my tongue,” he rasps amidst his growls, never stopping the movement around his cock, and you nod your head, vehemently, willing to do anything for him.
“I’m so close.” 
Hoseok pouts. “That’s so good, baby. You know what to do?” 
You swallow. “I’m gonna call you Daddy when I come.” 
He grins at you and the expression breaks when he fucks his tip, his brows casting a shadow on his face. You break along with it, shuddering—pleasured from watching him pleasure himself. And you break again when he praises you for your good answer. “Such a good girl. You’re gonna come hard for me?” 
You don’t get to say your yes because when he sucks your clit into his mouth and groans against it as he flicks it with his tongue, he’s a witness to it himself. The fruits in your orchard explode and he drinks their juices, running the muscle all over your pussy, his mouth smacking, enjoying every drop. You squeal the title, forcing pleased growls out of him that deepen when you swear, repeating the name over and over again until your orgasm smooths down the perimeters of your body, slowly dwindling away.  
You can’t breathe. Can’t think. Can’t see. White dots flood your vision and the only thing that grounds you is Hobi taking your hand in his. The dots swim away, revealing him on the verge of his own orgasm as he tugs on his length, rapidly now. 
“That was so good, baby. You came so well for me. Called me Daddy like I wanted. Good girl,” he praises and your moans are an endless stream, enveloping around his cock, which he guides your hand towards. The weight of it, his warmth, the protruding veins, you could come again just from the feel of him. “Jerk off your Daddy. He’s close, too, from the way you came for him.” 
The third person, fuck. You bite your lip, focusing on his tip as you grip him, twisting your wrist. His skin is sticky from your nectar and you spit onto your hand, earning a praise from him that makes your mind spin, even though you heard those two words plenty of times throughout your sinful date. 
It will never get old—it will only make your femininity wetter for him. 
And his growls, the same could be applied to them. They propel you to fuck him faster while your fingers sneak over to your sensitive clit that he provokes, rubbing circles that cloud your vision with a mist, painting him to be an angel—like the one you saw in the museum. 
And when he comes, he grows a pair of glorious wings. Black, with hints of rose gold and pinks. His body doubles over, hands propped on the dashboard and the passenger seat as he spills for you, ropes of cum painting your stomach in that eternal ivory color that serves as skin for those sculptures. In a way you become them once he praises you for making him come, his breaths a legato rivulet that gives you life, his hips snapping, fucking your hand. 
He smears his cum on your tanned stomach, fingers dipping below the waistband of your panties to discover a lighter shade of skin, marveling at the difference. Light passes through his eyes before he covers your pussy with the fabric, opening the glove department to fetch some tissues, cleaning you up, dragging down your dress and helping you sit up.
It’s at this moment, as he’s kneeling—towering over you and you’re sitting on your bum with your hands folded on your lap like the good girl he made you into, that he clutches the back of your neck and smashes his mouth into yours, moving it against you with such strength and vigor that you struggle to devour him in the same manner. It causes you to claw at his sides, to long to see his body in its full, bare beauty. His imaginary wings wrap around you, sealing the resplendence of your orgasm profoundly inside your skin and when he tastes you, his growls traveling down your throat are the raindrops that the orchard inside you needs in order to grow. You help him by moaning back, the aftertaste of you the sunlight. 
Piercing his gaze into yours, he caresses your hair, messes up your diligently fixed updo. Catches your ribbon as it falls, wrapping it around his hand, the wisps dangling from his fingers like your leg was just a few moments ago. 
You’re so satisfied that you could cry. 
You don’t even understand what just happened and how it came to be. Don’t remember what occurred before you sat down in his car—Hobi has completely and wholly erased it. 
And it’s him who notices that your hand still carries the remnants of him. You don’t care to look—you can’t rip your gaze away from the shine on his face, from the gratification smoothing out his features, from the pink flush decorating the perfect redness of his swollen lips. But Hobi forces you to, in the tenderest of ways. Looks lovingly at your palm, cooing, shooting that look into your eyes, where it unfolds, creates something new that you never experienced before. And when he grins, your stomach flips, winged creatures intoxicated with madness inside. 
“You see what you did?” he whispers, the love in his eyes expanding, growing warmer, burning you faintly. “I want you to lick it up. You deserve every drop.” The breath you let out causes him to tremble and you cradle the fabric of his shirt in your fist. Hobi kisses your fingers, looking at you through them, his smile quivering. “Stick out your tongue for me, baby.” 
You do and he slides your palm over it, his salty nectar the sea that swam against your body a week ago in your healing time and you moan, devouring his taste like he devoured your mouth, licking it up, collecting it until there’s nothing left. You show him your tongue, then, and Hobi plays with it, using his thumb, your ribbon wrapped around his hand tickling your chin. He rubs it on the muscle, playing chase with you again until he tells you to suck it. And the sound that descends from his lips once you do makes you squeeze your thighs together, your own wetness dripping out of you. 
To end it, Hobi kisses your forehead, lingering there for a few seconds longer. Caresses your mouth, tracing each line, tracing your cupid’s bow, making you glisten with your own saliva. A shining, lively angel—just like him. You whimper. 
“Swallow it, baby.” 
You do, showing him the evidence that you obeyed after. 
“Good girl.” 
You take the underside of him, semi hard, into your hand, giggling, heart thumping. “You just made me horny all over again.”
Hobi hums, brushing his ribbon-clad fingers through your hair from the crown of your head. You want him to do that once you suck him off. “And you’re gonna make me hard all over again if you touch me like that.” 
You mimic the noise he made, squeezing him. Hobi curses, delighting you. “Let’s go inside. I owe you that breakfast, don’t I?” 
He kisses you, softly, with a hint of harshness that causes your nipples to harden painfully against your bra. You almost rub your clit again, so fucking out of it, crazed. 
“You do, baby.” 
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You got everything you wanted in such a small amount of time that your vision twirls. Hobi is holding your hand as you’re leading him to your apartment, your ribbon still hanging from yours and his intertwinement, and your heart hasn’t stopped beating feverishly in your chest. Not even once. 
You’re facing the inevitable as you watch Hobi unlace his dress shoes on his knee, his cock stiff and uncomfortable in his pants. You’re brazenly falling for him. You know your hormones swirling your system from the lustfulness you indulged in aren’t to blame—if there’s anyone to blame, then it’s Hobi himself. You consider him to be such a beautiful person that you would be absolutely stupid, blind and deaf not to fall for him. And what’s more, you sense your decline to be safe. Stable. A leverage that won’t ever break. A ribbon that won’t fray. 
It’s as strange as it is inviting and your submission comes naturally to you. And this time, you don’t fear it won’t last. Don’t fear you’ll let up. There’s a sense vibrating in you that assures you that Hobi will take care of it. Put it back where it belongs if it ever strays. You don’t have to monitor it. You don’t have to do shit. 
You were wrong about one more thing. Hobi isn’t Daddy. 
He’s Father. 
It’s this thought that drives you to take off your dress and leave it in the middle of the floor that leads to your kitchen. You’re barren down to your soaked underwear, bra and knee socks, your feet basking in the way they don’t have to ache in your boots anymore. Pulling a plate of eggs out of the refrigerator, you set it on the counter, preparing a pan by oiling it on the stove. You hear Hobi’s feet pad on the floor as you pop some bread in the toaster and you turn your head, seeing only his dark silhouette standing behind you, your dress and your ribbon in his hands. 
Your heart quickens, abnormally. 
“How do you like your eggs?” you ask, resuming your cooking as you break the shell of an egg on the lip of the pan, spilling the delight into the bubbling oil. 
Hobi crosses the distance and you can only feel the softness of your ribbon when he places his hands on your hips, letting them travel until they stumble across the pooch of your lower belly. He groans, holding you there, pressing his hard, silk-clad cock against your nearly bare bum. 
Self-consciousness creeps in as he kneads one of your insecurities and you quiver, clasping your hand over his, your confidence wavering. 
“However you like them is how I like them,” Hobi flirts and you laugh through your nose, shaking your head, waiting for the egg white to fade into that milky color he painted your stomach with. 
Sunny side up it is. 
“Hobi, your game is out of this world,” you flirt back, sliding your spatula under the egg to check if it’s done before you can flip it. 
Hobi lowers himself onto his knees and you gasp, soundlessly. He begins to scatter violent kisses along the dots upon the flesh of your bum, sucking it into his mouth as if it were an orange he was sinking his teeth into. You have to grip the counter in order not to fall over, willing strength into your weakened legs. 
He bites the supple roundness of your ass cheek, smoothing out the pain with a flick of his tongue and kisses, gentle ones this time around. Hums. “Is it?” 
He glides his nose along the inner of your thigh, rooting right in the center of your pussy, burying his face there. You turn around halfway, arching your back, latching onto his hair that you’ve ruined, egg long forgotten. 
“Your thighs are wet again, fuck,” he whispers, mouthing your clit before he descends once again to them, licking them over, drinking your nectar that he’s created. Trails his tongue back up and, sliding your panties to the side, he takes you into his mouth, growling as he sucks onto your lips, playing with them using his tongue, hands spreading your ass cheeks, so he can have more space to make you absolutely lose yourself in him. 
And it’s working. Even more so when he begins to swirl his tongue around that other, tiny hole, causing your eyes to go cross before they roll back. Your head dips into a dreamy daze, where time doesn’t exist as he switches between flicking your clit and eating your ass and it isn’t until a certain burning smell suffuses your nostrils that you snap out of it. 
You’ve burned his egg, its edges black like the feathers of his imaginary wings, and you yelp, turning off the stove, pushing the pan away. 
“Hobi, I burned your egg,” you exclaim and he bends you over the counter while still remaining on his knees for you, sucking your clit with all the strength he possesses. Your climax pinches you in warning, lovingly, promising to melt over you like rain soon, so very soon. 
Hobi doesn’t give a fuck about his egg, it seems. 
“Just a little more, please,” he begs, moving his flat tongue from side to side on your bud, hands descending down your wet thighs until he reaches your knee socks, stopping there. Whimpers. 
That would’ve thrown you over the edge had he not pulled away, fingers wrapping around your knees. 
You turn around and the sight of him on his knees with his glazed nose, mouth and chin, with his cock pitifully erect in his pants, creating a print that makes you salivate, absolutely and irrevocably breaks you. You can still hear his plea ring in your mind, begging you to give him a few more seconds of your pussy, and your brain malfunctions. Numbness tightens around your fingers when you cradle his face and it feels so real when you do so—the fact that you’re wanted, desired; the fact that Hobi is the one in submission to you, dominant yet attentive to you to the point that he would never want do anything you wouldn’t. He listens to you, carves his life around you… and he hasn’t even known you for a month. 
You messed up his hair—and when you run your fingers through his strands, you feel your powerful ruination sifting through them, feel your seduction and your confidence, alive and breathing in that thick, dark brown mop of his. And now you crave to mess up his skin. Bruise it. Stain it with the pinks you can see in his imaginary wings. Watch them turn yellow like the rose gold in their flecks over the following days. 
You’re not letting go of him. 
Not when he looks at you like you’re Virgin Mary and he’s a sinner. 
You pull him up by the collars of his shirt, wrinkling the fabric, adding to the ruination, and it’s electrifying. He’s the cleanest sinner you’ve ever had the grace to see and you want to stain him. Beyond the stickiness of your juices. And when he towers over you and cages you in between his buff body and the counter, hands on either side of you upon the marble, his patchouli scent making you bloodthirsty, you don’t kiss him. No, you go straight for his neck. 
He didn’t expect it, groaning when you lick a stripe over his vein, sucking the skin inside your mouth. Over and over again until the sucking noises make him twitch and fist the ends of your hair, pressing his cock against your stomach. You’re feral, you’re inhuman, scattering kisses along that column like you’ve never had a man in your hands before. And it’s true. You never have. It was always you who had been in men’s hands. Never the other way around. 
Your fingers gain feeling when you undo the buttons of his shirt, ripping some of them, secretly preventing him from going to work after you’re finished with him. Unless you plaster your correcting concealers on him, he really can’t step a foot outside. The bruise you left on his column is huge, purply red, and the only thing it’s missing is bite marks. A joy rotates in you, rooting from the fact that you’re changing his plans, that you have an effect on him, and you unfold that emotion when you tug that shirt down his broad shoulders and press a kiss in the middle of his chest. 
But then Hobi grips your hair on the crown on your head, making you look at him. 
And you can’t explain it to yourself, why you like being manhandled like that, despite the freedom you just experienced. Like a child, whose father let her run free before he scolded her and told her to stop, for she ran for too long and it’s getting cold. 
“What are you doing?” he asks, lowly, and the tone etches itself onto your own throat because your answer is ready on the tip of your tongue, unabashed, dirty, throbbing.
“I need you to fuck me.” 
Hobi blinks, his brows rising, a light like a comet shooting past his irises before an unbounded, starless night shrouds them. 
You’ve done it. You’ve stained him. Now he needs to come all over you. Make a mess. Paint you again. 
He slackens his hold on your hair. Runs his hand down the length. “If I fuck you, I’ll breed you.” Curls his hand around your throat, where those words form a new necklace, plated with that rose gold. Your mouth parts, a moan falling past, your nectar in tandem, mind dizzy from the idea of being stuffed full of his cum. He flattens his palm over your sternum, hooks his fingers over the band of your bra in the middle of your breasts. You hope he chisels the lines of his hand into your skin. You want to wear him. “Are you on birth control?” 
You stopped taking it the moment you were broken up with. Didn’t think you’d need it so soon. Didn’t think you’d have a man in your life again, let alone sleep with him. 
Your body desires to please Hoseok so resolutely that a wisp of your regret swathes around his wrist—regret that you threw away those pills that are the driving force in his sexuality. He might have been okay with not taking this any further, but you’re not. You’re far, far from okay. 
You want to be bred. You want to be bred so much that you could cry. 
Your mouth pouts, but your sadness doesn’t touch your seduction. It merely heightens it. 
“You have a breeding kink?” you ask, mimicking his former words, causing him to drag his tongue over his lips slowly, divulging his arousal. It’s another tree that begins to grow in your orchard, planted by your bare hands. A cherry tree, its pink flowerets the flush that spreads across his prominent pecs. You want to make them shiny with your tongue. 
And you do. 
You place wet kisses over the underside of his left pec, nibbling on the skin, your small stature making it easy for you. Hobi inhales a sharp breath, sneaking his fingers under the cup of your bra, grasping your breast, squeezing until you whimper. 
“A severe breeding kink,” Hoseok corrects you, just like you did in his car. He pulls down your bra straps, his hand quick to undo the clasp on your back, disposing you of the undergarment, dropping it onto the ground. Gooseflesh spreads across your skin and you let him feel it, let him feel the effect he has on you by pressing yourself against him, twisting your arms around his torso. 
A tender hug, in the middle of a bonding moment. You’d be so happy, you’d laugh, you’d skip, if you had never thrown away those pills.
You wonder if he feels the drum of your heart, if he feels how it’s creating a brand new music that no human, no celestial being has ever heard before. 
“I stopped taking birth control several weeks ago, Hobi,” you say, your regret and your sadness lowering your tone. Hobi coos and it makes you want to sob. “Did you bring a condom?” 
He caresses your bare back, your hair a stream of a waterfall that he parts with his hand. “No, I didn’t expect this to happen.” 
You do the same for him, burying your face deeper into his chest, perceiving that you’re embracing a pure angel. You engrave patterns into his skin, feathers of wings that are dripping with the fire of stars. Even though you’re dying to get fucked, this tenderness is, little by little, appeasing your darkness in a way you don’t really understand. 
“We don’t have to do anything. I can make you come with my mouth again,” Hobi says, drifting his nails along the perimeter of your shoulder blade while his other hand grips your waist. The memory of the moons to the sky you paint on his back.
You lift your head. Meet the gray clouds in his eyes. “You want to breed me that bad?” 
A smile curls one end of his mouth. “It’s what you deserve.” 
The same smile finds a way to your mouth, then blossoms into a grin, your heart a heavy music, and you press it into the middle of his chest. Bite him there, his growls another instrument in the song. He clutches the hair at the nape of your neck, coaxing out a similar sound, your darkness a wave that ebbs to and fro. 
“Put it in my ass, then.” 
Hobi calls you by your name, sternly. 
“What?” 
He sighs. “You want to get fucked in your ass on the first date?” 
You don’t know what part of his sentence makes you hiccup. Whether it’s his purity, the fact that such an angel voiced out that lewd desire of yours and didn’t jump head-first into its sea—or whether he acknowledged, once again, that this is a date. Hobi laughs, endearingly, and you blush. He kisses your cheek, lifting your chin, placing a chaste kiss onto your lips and you could die right now and know you’ll be entering the pearly gates. He’s saved a spot for you there, negotiated with God that you’ll spend your eternity there like the businessman he is. 
It’s what propels you to get on your knees. 
“Baby.” 
And it’s him stopping you each time you want more that makes you fall for him harder. 
“You’re so good to me, Hoseok, I can’t help it. I want to give back to you as much as I can.” 
He utters a low, deep curse, tipping up his chin as he cradles your face in both hands. Helps you stand to your feet, kisses you with something that doesn’t resemble the chastity of before and you moan into his mouth, digging moons into his back. You press your pelvis against his thighs, frustrated that you can’t reach his manhood and Hobi hears you, lifts you up and you wrap your legs around him, grinding your femininity against his manliness, squeaking the same curses down his throat. 
“Fuck, baby, grind that pussy on me like that. Just like that, yes. You learn well, don’t you? You’re such a good girl, you just need to get fucked, don’t you, baby?” 
You agree with every word, your expression of pleasure saying the words for you, and Hobi moans, pushing your hips down on him while he meets you each time. 
“Where’s your bedroom, baby?” 
“Down the hall. First door to the right.” 
You suck on his neck as he takes you there, plopping you down onto the edge of your bed. You watch your hands undo the button of his pants, but then he accidentally kicks into something and you know exactly what it is. 
An orange Nike box filled with the two toys you own. 
And Hobi wouldn’t have crouched to get it had you not started giggling. 
How thrilling it is—to see him holding something so private, something no one has ever seen before. 
He palms his cock once he discovers what’s inside, rolling his eyes back. He throws the box next to you on the mattress, pushing you back and ripping your panties out of your body in a split second. Your giggles die, replaced by whimpers, replaced by the beat of your clit and his vulgarities as he pins your knees down, gazing, lovingly, at the way your nectar trickles down to your other hole. He bends to lick it up and you die, too. 
“Naughty fucking girl. How can you be so naughty and so good at the same time? You’re making me lose my mind,” Hobi snarls, putting his entire weight into the back of your knees and you gush for him, gasping, not able to take his praise, your hips instinctually raising for more of his tongue, which he slaps your thigh for. Once, twice, three times, four times until you whimper so loudly that there’s nothing else left for him to do but let up, grab your pink hitachi and lay down on his back, guide you to sit on his face. 
It’s now that he takes the time to ogle your body. His night-tinged eyes glide along your tan lines, his fingers tracing them, making you shudder and rotate your hips above his mouth that he wets and keeps wetting as if it’s not enough to quench his thirst. 
“God, you’re so beautiful,” he chokes out, brushing the pads of his fingers along your stiffened nipples. Fireworks shoot out above your orchard, casting a rainbow of colors upon the trees and bushes. “I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve you to have you like this. You belong to that museum, baby, but I’d die if someone were to look at you in my place.” 
His possessiveness coated with so much affection and admiration for you elongate your imaginary wings. And you can’t halt the rounding of your mouth, the pool of tears that line your eyes, the cracking of your heart as you take in his precious words. You feel like flying; you feel like soaring free with the knowledge that with the two beats of his own wings he’ll catch up to you, fly with you like two doves. 
You want to kiss him. Pay your gratitude that way and when you begin to crawl down his body, he stops you by grabbing your waist, immobilizing you above his face. 
“Stay where you are. You’re not sitting on my cock until you come on my tongue. Is that what you want? Ride Daddy’s cock until he covers you with his cum?” 
You can’t take it anymore. You simply can’t. 
Hobi turns the vibrator to life and its buzzing sound makes you quiver. You lower yourself onto his mouth that he quickly opens for you, darting out his tongue. He lets you ride the muscle, guiding your hips to twirl in circles, and you hold onto your breasts for emotional support as you sense yourself slowly disappearing in him, in the pleasure he gives you, in his warm, dark aura. 
Your mouth has no lock, no force to stop it from speaking. 
“I was wrong, Hoseok,” you start, changing the direction—swinging your hips back and forth as you grab onto his hair with one hand while the other stimulates your nipple, making you pant, whine and so terribly out of it. “It’s not your game that’s out of this world. It’s your fucking dirty talk.” 
Hobi hums, flicking your hand away and pinching your nipple, causing you to tip your head back and pour more vigor into your movement, his mouth too busy to respond. 
“If you ever talk to anyone like this that’s not me, I’ll kill her, you hear me? She won’t live to see the next day.” 
It’s Hobi now that can’t seem to take it anymore. 
Holding you steady by the waist, he sits up, sucking on your clit with so much strength that you scream, your body shuttering so violently that you completely lose yourself. He throws you onto your pillows, raises your hips until they’re at level with his mouth and finishes his fucking job. Alternates between sucking and licking, stars flooding your vision, the ones you traced on his beautiful, broad back. 
You come and you don’t stop. 
Hobi spits on your clit and presses down the hitachi on it, moving it from side to side, your orgasm prolonging, reaching highs beyond the heavenly kind and all you can see is him, doused in colors that glimmer and his name, the right variation of it this time, falls from your lips like a prayer. Right variation, right prayer. 
Virgin Mary that is looking at her God. 
Setting the toy and your bum on the bed, he takes both of your hands into his fist as you’re still convulsing, in the middle of your undying orgasm. He lines his cock at your entrance, changes his mind last minute, and glides it along your sensitive pussy, holding himself at the base. Back and forth, the ebb and the flow of the sea. The sight does anything but calm you down. It supports the continuation of your orgasm. 
“Listen to me very carefully,” he whispers, lowering your hands to his manhood until they wrap around him. “This cock has been yours the moment you came out of this fucking building to meet me outside. Every ridge, every fucking vein is yours.” He squeezes your hold against him, moving it up and down in an agonizing way that makes him shudder just the same. God at a very breaking point. “And these—” He groans as he uses your hands to cup his balls. “These fucking kids are all yours. Yours to swallow. Yours to decorate this beautiful body with. Yours to stuff your little hole with.” Your chest doesn’t rise with any inhalation of breath. You’re motionless, bloodless, paralyzed through and through. Scorching to the touch. Horny beyond your senses. Hobi pins your hands above your head, lining himself up, at last, at your entrance. Sinks inside you in one swift, but vigorous motion until he’s buried in deep to the hilt and he consumes your scream, kissing you so hard that he sucks every last drop of life you had in you. Then, he nudges his nose against yours, kissing its tip as well. “So don’t think for a second that these eyes are for anyone else but you.” A brutal thrust. A yelp. A loss of time and surroundings. “I’m yours, pup. I’m fucking yours.” A mad, mad laughter. “I’ve known you for a week. Ate your pussy first before I kissed you. And you touched yourself in my fucking car because you got horny from the way I praised you in that museum. How could I not be yours?”
The pet name, the magnificence of his sonnet, the stillness of his cock as you clench around him—the very cozy feeling of him being at home, being at the mountain of Athos that you blessed. You feel so small beneath him, so taken care of—and you’re at loss for words, though only one remains in your otherwise erased vocabulary, and from the top of your lungs, you utter it.
“Daddy.” 
His imaginary wings flutter, the pink swelling over the black, and he growls, letting go of your hands and folding you in half, leaning his weight on the back of your thighs. Props an overlapped pillow beneath your bum, so you’re at the perfect level for him to start fucking you properly.
And he does, coaxing out your screams, causing your legs to shake on either side of his shoulders. 
“That’s right, pup. I’m your Daddy. You’re doing so good, screaming for me the way I like it.” 
Hobi pounds into you, giving you a half of his length that’s more than enough. Bends at the waist to scatter wet kisses along the back of your thigh, filling you to the hilt as he does so, your juices squelching around him, making such a serene, glorious sound that forces him to bite down hard onto your flesh. No alleviation after, just long and ruthless strokes while he stares down at you, eating you with his eyes. The ghost of the pain lingers, adding to the experience, adding volume to your whiny noises. 
“You’re taking it so well. You’re a good pup, aren’t you?” 
You sob, the pressure gyrating deep in your lower tummy, the pet name the thing that will throw you over the edge if he calls you by it again. “Yes, Daddy. I love it when you call me that.” 
A hum. “Oh, yeah?” 
There he fucking goes again. 
A dam rushes to break and you’re defenseless.
“Yeah, I love it so much that it’s gonna make me come.” 
Hobi sucks in a breath. “Tell me you’re my good little pup and I’ll let you come.” The same breath he inhaled lodges in your throat and you watch him with a blurry vision reach over for your hitachi and turn up the intensity until the vibrations are so loud that you hear them echoing within your headspace.
He fucks you faster, ridding you of any chance to speak. Teases you with the toy by placing it, barely, on your stiffened nipple, leaning over to moisten it with his tongue before doing it again. And you can’t stop it and neither can he, the way your orgasm overtakes your whole being. It’s at this moment, when he thrusts become sloppy, that you manage to croak out the words he wanted you to say. 
“I’m your good little pup, Hoseok, oh fuck, yes, yes,” you whisper, your sentence blending into an efflux of legato moans—and this, this is his very undoing. 
And Hobi does something you didn’t expect him to do. 
As colors burst in your perspective and your orgasm drags you under, he stimulates your clit with the toy, pulling out of you and pressing his tip against its vibrating side, growling so deeply that it forces your juices out of you, sprinkling him with its iridescent drops as he tugs at his length. He paints your stomach, paints the hitachi, his nectar so enormous that it lands upon your breasts, even as far as on your neck. His body glistens in sweat and now your essence—and looking at him with your hazy vision, another orgasm rolls in. 
You thrash your body so hard he has to pin you down, ripping the pillow out from behind you, laying down his weight on you. He kisses you and the lip lock lasts, seemingly, for a century. He moves his mouth against yours, basking in the feel of your puffy mouth as he alters between kissing you harshly and kissing you gently, getting to know you this way. 
And when he lets up to breathe, he brushes your hair away, flings the vibrator out until it falls off the bed. 
“Say it again,” Hobi says, affection flashing in his now rounded eyes, its warmth thumping. “Louder, for me.” 
Your throat is dry, but you manage to do it with a sleepy smile. Think you would do anything to please him. “I’m your good little pup.” 
Cupping your face, he kisses you with such tenderness that you begin to cry. Your tears soak his cheeks and he whimpers into your mouth, moved just the same by the depth, the vibrancy of the energy thickening between you. 
And when he looks at you, his own tears rush in his waterline. 
“That’s it, baby,” he whispers, pausing for a second. “What have you done to me?”
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When afternoon rolls in, Hobi is still tangled up in your sheets. You brought him breakfast to bed, one you didn’t burn this time, while he rested, naked and gratified, still flushed in pink, but clean from your shower. His patchouli scent intermingled with your body wash, cinnamon and lemon, concocting something intoxicating in you that made you see him with a halo above his head. He became a saint by giving in to his desires, by coming so hard that you still feel his hot ropes of cum singeing all those sensitive, intimate parts of your body. Hobi took his time tracing and smearing each and every drop, rubbing it deep in you as if he was digging a grave for your past. And you watched him do it, with tear-stained cheeks, acknowledging yourself, just as intimately, with the information that this is something Hobi likes to do.
You plan to put that into practice the next time you get to touch him. 
He’s grazing his fingers along your arm as you’re laying halfway on your side, halfway on him, your leg in between his. Seems to be lost in thought, seems to be searching for his words when he widens his travel across your body, going as far as to the peaks of your shoulder blades before returning back. You feel an inkling to help him, feel like it’s the least you can do. 
“What are you thinking about?” you try, dragging a finger across his collarbone. Hobi sighs, so terribly reactive to your touch, your head lifting in such a calming manner as he breathes in and out. 
“Did I scare you with what I said?”
His heart under your ear begins to hammer and right away you understand the gravity of his question. He’s lost himself in a flashback of today’s sinful events, but stumbled across a high, overpowering mountain of his bared emotions—the blessed mountain of Athos. And it seems as though he’s forgotten the way back, the trees around him growing dense, the trees of panic that whisper to him that, maybe, he made a mistake. 
You hope, with every fiber of your being, that he doesn’t regret those words of beauty that have come to live under your skin like planets in the universe that you and he have created. 
That would ruin you. That would break you—and not in the pleasant kind that you like. That universe would drop upon you and you don’t think you’re strong enough to pick up your own half of your creation, shake it off and learn to live again. 
You straddle him and he covers you with your duvet. Not your naked breasts, but your torso, inviting you into that island. You thought he did to prevent distraction from weakening his focus, but he doesn’t regard your body like that—doesn’t regard it as an instrument of lust. Something about that moves you, enough for you to take his hands, your thumbs in the middle of his palms, and spatter your soft kisses on them. On his fingers, his knuckles. And when you reach the back of his hand, you halt, boring your gaze into his, catching that comet flying past his eyes again and staying this time, staying in the glint that appears as his brown pools wet. 
“Your words mean a lot to me. I carry them in my heart. You know that poem?” 
Hobi shakes his head, flattening his lips, closing his eyes for a brief moment. 
You don’t mind. You’re delighted to enlighten him. 
“I carry your heart with me,” you recite, keeping the heel of his palm against your lips. “I carry it in my heart. I am never without it. Anywhere I go, you go, my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing, my darling,” you finish the first stanza of the poem that has not left your bloodstream ever since you were a teenage girl. Sharing that with him brings out a sea of feelings you remember your past self invariably longed to swim in. Tenderness, closeness, passion. Having it now feels as though you’ve passed a milestone. Hobi’s halo flashes with a rosy pink hue and your softened heart constricts. “The things you said were my doing, Hobi.” 
He caresses your side, starting from your armpit, going down the side of your breast, your waist until he arrives at the fleshy part of your hip, which he grasps. His chin quivers as he opens his mouth to speak and a lump forms in your throat. 
“You’re a poem, pup,” he whispers, circling his thumb over your tummy. “You don’t mind that I said those things?” 
You kiss his hands again, upon the same places to make your affection last longer on his skin. Your clit awakens at the pet name and naturally, you scooch over until you’re sat on his soft manhood over the duvet and you begin to move your hips back and forth. Hobi hisses, but doesn’t stop you this time. Lets you do what you want in the safety you conjured around him. 
“Say them again.” 
You speed up your movement. 
Hobi moans. Pauses. Swallows. Thinks. “I’m yours.” 
You grind harder in reward, moaning with him, feeling him stiffen under your clit, feeling him comprehend that you love those declarations. 
“My cock is yours,” he breathes out, his other hand joining the other and gripping your hip, digging in his nails. Another half moons, another beauty, intensifying the pleasure. You lick your fingertips and pinch your nipples. Hobi shudders, visibly, underneath you. “If you keep this up, I’m gonna have to cancel my work meeting.” 
You laugh, meekly but seductively, prolonging your thrusts, slowing them down, coaxing pained groans out of him. A delight. “Who said I wanted you to go?” 
Hobi curses, switching places with you on a whim that surprises you, bends you over, arches your back by lifting your bum in the air. The duvet falls, sadly, off of the mattress—and your soul, for him, falls equivalently. 
He slaps the side of your thigh. One, twice, thrice. “Who’s pussy is this?” 
You long to see him, your soul begs for it. Whispers to you to grab your phone and you do, swiping your finger on the screen and angling it so your camera has a blissful view of him. Of him fixed, darkly, on your ass and your femininity in the middle. 
Curious to know what’s taking you so long to answer, his brows rise as he discovers what you’re doing and he bites his lip, pulls on your legs to straighten them and you plop down on the mattress with a loosened breath. He gets in the same position. Licks over the swell of your ass cheek. 
“Film it. Film yourself telling me who’s pussy this is,” Hoseok commands and in a millisecond, without a thought spared, you click on the red button, excitement tingling your nerves. 
“My pussy is yours, Hoseok.” 
His eyes flick to the camera, meeting your stare, and your breath hitches, the view so attractive as he mouths that skin, marking it. He sneaks a hand to your clit, lifting his body a little, and spanks the spot he bruised. You gasp, elated, humming in a high-pitched tone, causing him to smirk. 
“Ride my hand. Whose pussy is this, baby, hm?” 
You snap your hips, furrowing your brows at the faint pleasure, at the desperation that courses through your veins. 
“Yours, Hoseok, ah, fuck. I want you inside me, please.” 
And he takes you, right there on camera, from behind—immortalizing your inside joke as you and him mention it and laugh about it together, immortalizing the way he paints your wings that ivory color and the way he rubs it in, sinking it deep within its membrane. 
And when you’re so spent that you can’t keep your eyes open and Hobi is drifting his mouth over your breasts, he tells you to send it to him. And with one cracked open, you do. 
It’s later in the evening that you find out that it wasn’t Hobi you sent that video to and your blood freezes. 
Your phone rings and Jungkook’s picture fills the screen. 
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𓂃 ౨ৎ LOVE-KISSED BABIES: @tkslovechild, @jjk7k, @parkinglot-nights, @bethvar, @Sexytholland, @yoongibaybee, @crystaleah, @fennecnco, @lil-kpopstan, @euphoricmyth
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Š 2024 hoseoksluna, all rights reserved.
BACK to masterlist | READ part one
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glowettee ¡ 3 months ago
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hiii! i love your acc, it's so cute :3 i was wondering if you could do a post about self-love, it's something i've been struggling w/ lately. thank youuu
uncommon but life-changing self-love practices (that actually work) 🎀
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posted by: glowettee
hey angel! thank you for this question in my mailbox! and ahhhh thank you so much you're so sweet!! i'm sorry this post was a little late, self-care is soooo important, i want to give you some tips that you don't hear to often that i do in my self-love journey! i'll share some not-so-obvious self-love practices that literally changed my life! ♡
♡ redefining your space psychology because your environment shapes your self-perception:
bedroom makeover with intention:
rearrange furniture to face the sunrise (this literally changed my morning mindset!)
create a "victory wall" with tiny achievements (i put up a photo of my first B- grade that turned into an A-)
place mirrors strategically (not just for selfies, but for daily affirmations)
use color psychology (i painted one wall rose quartz pink in my room and it actually improved my mood)
create a dedicated self-love corner (mine has fairy lights, positive letters from friends, and little trinkets from my childhood, along with printed photos from pinterest with self-love affirmations/lists.
♡ morning practices instead of basic routines, try these instead:
the "main character energy" morning:
write how your day went (successfully) and about yourself in third person (like "mindy gracefully picked up her pen, to conquer calculus, she did all her chores, and even studied japanese for 2 hours.")
practice "mirror dating" (spend 5 mins having an actual conversation with yourself - it's weird but works!)
create a "today i choose" list (instead of a to-do list)
dance to one song before doing anything else (i do taylor swift, or newjeans obviously)
write a love letter to a body part you're struggling with (i wrote to my uncooperative hair and now we're besties <3)
♡ digital self-love (but make it intentional) because we live online but need boundaries:
phone transformation:
change your passwords to affirmations (mine is a variation of "mindyisworthy2025")
create a folder of your awkward photos (embrace the cringe! and laugh with your friends, its so fun)
record yourself modeling, or pretending your a celebrity or k-pop idol
take selfies without filters (document your real smile)
set random alarms with love notes to yourself
hide little sticky notes with cute reminders about yourself in your room, so when you stumble upon it a month later it'll make you smile!
social media rebellion:
post the photos you'd usually delete (even if it's made private)
share your real study space (messy notes and all)
document your growth journey (even the uncomfortable parts)
create a finsta for your completely unfiltered self
make reels about your self-love journey (even if they're private)
♡ physical self-love (the weird but effective version) not basic bubble baths:
unexpected body appreciation:
thank your body parts for specific things ("thank you hands for letting me write my study notes")
have a private dance party in weird places (i do this in elevators when i'm alone)
wear your prettiest clothes to study, or even to the grocery store (even if no one sees)
make up your own choreography to your favorite songs
make your own workout or stretching routine with different stretches/exercises you make up yourself
comfort zone expansion:
try eating alone in public (start small - i began with coffee shops)
wear that "special occasion" outfit to class
speak up in class even if your voice shakes
send yourself flowers to your dorm/apartment (I LOVE DOING THIS EVERY VALENTINES <33)
take yourself on cute dates (let a coin flip decide where you go! or ask google.)
♡ emotional archaeology dig deeper than surface-level feelings:
create an emotion museum:
keep a "weird thoughts" journal (mine has my 3am existential questions)
make a playlist for each mood (even the uncomfortable ones)
collect "emotional souvenirs" (me and my grandmother had a cafe date a few years ago, and i still keep the receipt today)
document your crying sessions (trust me, looking back at these helps)
write letters to your past and future self
validation exercises:
practice saying "my feelings about this are valid" in the mirror
create a "proof of worth" folder on your phone
collect screenshots of nice messages
record yourself giving pep talks
keep a "wins" journal (especially tiny ones)
♡ advanced self-love techniques for when you're ready to level up:
relationship building with yourself:
schedule weekly "self-dates" (i do wednesday coffee dates with myself)
create a personal manifesto (update it monthly)
develop inside jokes with yourself
celebrate monthly self-love anniversaries
create traditions just for you
growth documentation:
take progress polaroids (not just physical)
voice record your daily thoughts
measure growth in unconventional ways (like "times i chose myself")
create time capsules every season
write monthly letters to yourself
self-love isn't just face masks and bubble baths (though those are nice too!). it's about building a deep, weird, wonderful relationship with yourself. it's about becoming your own best friend, confidante, and biggest supporter.
some of these might seem strange at first, but that's okay! the best relationships often have their quirks. start with what feels right and slowly expand your comfort zone. it's not just about practicing self-love, it's also about creating your own unique love language with yourself!
you're doing amazing things just by being you, and i'm so proud of you for prioritizing this journey! remember, the relationship you have with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship in your life.
xoxo, mindy 🎀
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pepperonidk ¡ 4 months ago
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i. i wish that you and i lived in the sims || to.you
↳ "... but instead we're both at some trashy halloween party downtown.''
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Pairing: Jeon Wonwoox gn!Reader Summary: When your friend Chan invites (bribes) you to come watch his band play at a stupid frat party, you're surprised to see that Jeon Wonwoo from your social psychology class is the lead singer. Warnings: alcohol mentions, cursing Songs Mentioned: about last night - monsta x, sims - lauv
A/N: hehehehe I'm back for another Jeon Wonwoo autumn/winter rom-com. buckle in folks, this one was so cute to write. My last wonwoo series was for the bookworms, this one is for the keshi simps.
let me know if you'd like to be tagged! comments and rb's are appreciated :)
back to playlist || next track ⏭ 
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“Chan, why the hell are you dragging us out to this party?” you complained to your friend as he threw himself down onto your sofa. He reached over to grab some candy from the bowl you had on your coffee table. You sent him a sharp glare and he swung his feet off the couch with a sheepish smile.
He simply shrugged in response to your question, the movement of his shoulders barely recognizable under the giant pumpkin costume he wore. “The band’s playing at some pre-Halloween party, Mingyu and Seungcheol told me to invite all my friends.”
A scoff came from the other side of the room, where Soonyoung, in his “sexy cowboy” costume, was leaning against the wall. “Do they know that you only have two of those?” You heard a laugh beside him as Chan glared at him.
“You’re here too, aren’t you?” Seungkwan raised an eyebrow at Soonyoung. “That makes four at least.” He put up each finger on one hand as he listed off everyone, besides Chan, present: himself, you, Soonyoung, and Hansol.
“I’m not his friend,” Hoshi rolled his eyes before looking away. “And Hansol is Seungcheol’s cousin, he doesn’t count. So yeah, smart-ass. Two friends.” He pointed at you and Seungkwan, who were dressed in matching pumpkin costumes with Chan. Hansol, who was dressed as three-hole-punch Jim from the Office, nodded in agreement. 
Soonyoung, to some extent, was right. He sat by Chan in the psychology class you two shared (often asking if the two of you could share your notes with him) and Hansol comes to the band’s shows all the time.
“Hey,” you pointed out. “The pumpkin costumes were not my idea. I wanted to be Pitbull.” You attempted to cross your arms over the orange felt encasing your body, to no avail.
“Not fair,” Seungkwan countered. “We’ve been matching pumpkins since the fourth grade.” 
“Why is Hansol exempt this year then?” You huffed.
“I told you guys I’d be a pumpkin on Halloween,” he shrugged. “It’s October 17th.”
You rolled your eyes. He had a point. And it was far too late for you to find a different costume now. Soonyoung scoffed at your playful bickering. “At least you’re a hot pumpkin,” he joked. You were used to Soonyoung’s flirtatious comments by now, but you never really took them too seriously. He didn’t either. He seemed like he only did it to get a rise out of Chan, who’d come to fill some sort of brotherly role in your life since you were kids.
“Yeah?” Chan spoke with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Glad you think I’m hot.” He and Seungkwan exchanged a laugh as Seungkwan walked to comfort a sulking Soonyoung.
“Not you,” Soonyoung turned away, swatting an arm out at Seungkwan who pat him on the back pitifully. “Ugh I don’t even know why I agreed to come along.”
“Because you needed my notes to pass class, dumbass,” Chan retorted.
Remembering your psych class, you cleared your throat before speaking. “Anyway,” you began. “The point was that we have a psych exam tomorrow and Halloween is still well over a week away.”
Chan mumbled something about the frat wanting to beat all the other frat parties happening and promising free coffee for you tomorrow in exchange for coming out tonight. You rolled your eyes in response. You couldn’t be begged to come, but you could be bribed, apparently.
With that, three pumpkins, a Jim looking for his Pam, and a sexy cowboy made their way to the local frat house. It felt pretty ridiculous really, to see the five of you (especially the pumpkins) all pile into Chan’s beat up Camry on a random Sunday in October. 
The blue and white house that sat at the end of Greek row still seemed relatively untrashed, save for the (decorative?) shopping cart filled with empty cans of beers and seltzers on the front lawn. The party had yet to hit its full swing and you internally groaned at the thought of being here all night. Upon entering, the four of you followed Chan to where his band was beginning to set up. Somehow, they had managed to set up a stage in the cramped first floor of the house. 
Chan’s band, No Name, consisted of him, and three other students from various departments of the school who were all also somehow academic weapons: Mingyu, a rather popular computer engineering major on lead guitar; Seungcheol, a finance major on drums; and Wonwoo, a biomedical engineering major, was their bassist and lead singer. Chan himself played rhythm guitar as well as keyboard, and was a junior in music education.
He started in the band around the end of the spring semester when Joshua, the previous guitarist for the band, and the others came up to him after one of his recitals to invite him into the band. Chan talked about his band members a lot, but this was the first time you were going to meet them in person. 
The rest of the band was already on stage, tuning their instruments and messing with the amps and wires that were scattered around. They looked up at Chan as he hopped onto the platform to join them. Mingyu gave him an excited wave as he played a few test notes on his guitar. Seungcheol gave him an acknowledging nod, before turning his attention back to his drums.
The third member, Wonwoo, looked up and nodded at Chan before glancing at the rest of you. He seemed surprised to see you there because you watched his dark eyes flicker back to you. His gaze was intense, but cautious. You turned your head in confusion until you realized you’d seen him in class before. You hadn’t really spoken to him before, but you gave him a light wave anyway and he returned with the same nod he gave Chan. 
“Hansol,” Mingyu greeted him with a kind of friendliness that reminded you of a puppy. “Jim from the Office?” Hansol gave him a nod, appreciating that he got the reference and gave him a high five in response. Seungcheol was not in costume, but Mingyu and Wonwoo seemed to have a matching motif – Mingyu was wearing all white with a halo headband atop their head, and Wonwoo was in all black with devil horns on his head. Mingyu turned his attention to the rest of you and hopped off the stage to meet you. “Hansol, you’ll have to introduce me to your friends.”
“Right,” Hansol started. He introduced you and Soonyoung to Mingyu and to Seungcheol and Wonwoo who were listening while finishing up. Soonyoung nodded to Wonwoo who looked at him with a raised eyebrow. 
“Hey bro,” Soonyoung greeted. Wonwoo scoffed in return with a shake of his head.
“Not your bro,” he replied curtly. His icy stare and stoic demeanor was not the type you’d expect from the lead singer of a beloved campus band. You’d heard girls and guys in class swooning over him, but to be honest, he wasn’t what you expected. He seemed like the type to want to be far, far away from a party, let alone perform at one.
Mingyu raised an eyebrow at him in amusement. “Sorry about him, he’s not good with strangers,” he said with a laugh, as if this was something that happened often. Icy… but with a bite, it seemed.
Wonwoo rolled his eyes behind his glasses. “This is that idiot who sits in front of me and watches Fortnite streams during class.” Mingyu hummed in recognition as Wonwoo explained. You couldn’t help but let out a chuckle at Wonwoo’s dry response, earning his gaze.
“He’s right Soonyoung,” you agreed. “You are a bit of an idiot.” Wonwoo’s lips twitched at your agreement.
“And you’re the one who shares notes with the idiot so he passes,” he raised a challenging eyebrow at you. There was a glint in his eyes that you couldn’t quite read.
“Yup,” you affirmed with a grin, meeting his eyes. “His savior, if anything.”
Soonyoung opened his mouth to retort before a voice caught everyone’s attention. Jun, the president of the frat called out to Wonwoo. He was dressed as a minion. “Hey Wonwoo,” he greeted. “Are you guys ready? More people are starting to show up, so I figured I’d ask if you guys were ready to start your set.” Wonwoo nodded and Jun turned to the rest of you. “There’s snacks and drinks in the kitchen.” He leaned over and lowered his voice conspiratorially before adding, “I’d go ahead and dig into the charcuterie before Seokmin gets here and gets a whiff of the prosciutto.”
The group of you moved away from the amps by the stage and towards the kitchen where, sure enough, enough alcohol and snacks for an army were haphazardly layed out. A strum from the guitar and a tap on the mic caught your attention as Wonwoo introduced the band. “Hey everyone, we’re No Name. Enjoy, I guess.” Without any more fanfare, he turned to Seungcheol and nodded as they began their first song, a rather upbeat song about partying. The cheers from the now crowded living area spurred them on. With a fresh drink in your red cup, you made your way back towards the stage to watch the group.
Honestly they were pretty good, and you wondered why it had taken you so long to actually see one of their shows. Mingyu had an upbeat and charismatic aura on stage, constantly bouncing on his feet and even sending an occasional flirty wink to people in the crowd. Seungcheol seemed to get lost in the music and you watched as his eyes shut and he seemed to be in his own world. Even Chan, who looked focused on his instrument, nodded his head along to the music and you could recognize his voice ever so often in a harmony. 
And there was Wonwoo.
 Although he didn’t look it… or particularly sound like it from his cold and short manner of speaking, had a melodic tone to his low voice. He was much different on stage than what you had gleaned from him in the short interaction you had with him. Then, he felt intense and closed off, as if he had already placed himself at an emotional distance from those around him. His stage presence however, was magnetic – the way he leaned into his microphone and would turn to face the band every so often to give cues, he seemed so in command, The way he’d smirk every so often or scan around the audience, it made you want to be the object of his gaze. it was impossible not to stare. 
About last night, I was undone God it feels right, being so wrong And I realized, all the blurry nights are when I feel alive.
You looked around at your friends as you began to dance. Hansol gently bobbed along to the music. Seungkwan stood beside him, taking a sip from his red cup. Soonyoung was talking animatedly to Jun and a guy whose plate was full of cheese and prosciutto – Seokmin, you remember. This was fun, you concluded.
Back on stage, Mingyu hit a high note that caught your attention and the fanfare told you the song was coming to an end. You watched mesmerized as Wonwoo stepped away from the microphone to pluck a string of notes on his bass, head nodding along to the music before returning to the mic and gripping it with both hands. “About last night…” he trailed off and ran his hands through his jet black hair. The rest of the band continued on with the last measures of the song, Mingyu’s fingers flying up and down the neck of his guitar and Seungcheol running through the end of a drum solo. 
You found yourself grinning as you clapped and cheered along with the crowd. After a brief pause, Wonwoo’s bass kicked off the next song and you scurried off to the kitchen to top off your drink and grab a snack. With the light buzz of alcohol in your head, you began to realize you didn’t seem to particularly mind the growing crowd dancing alongside you. Time seemed to pass quickly as you found yourself eagerly waiting for each new song the band played. The energy on stage felt electric and contagious, and you found yourself locked in on one member in particular – Wonwoo.
There was something about how he sang each lyric with a raw rasp in his voice and the way his fingers slid down his fretboard with ease that made him so good to look at. The music they played was fun and upbeat, but when they slowed down for a final song, it surprised you enough to snap you out of your trance as Wonwoo spoke in the mic again, leaning in enough that his lips touched the cold metal.
“It’s our last song of the night,” he began with a sigh, catching his breath from the last song. He grabbed his water bottle that was by his mic stand and took a quick sip before wiping some sweat off his brow and continuing. He set his own bass down and reached for the acoustic guitar that was set between him and Chan. “Let’s chill the fuck out and slow things down. For the last time, we’re No Name.” 
Wonwoo’s voice came out over a smooth melody on the keyboard. As people began to gather in pairs or move away from the dance floor, you found yourself close to the stage once again. Wonwoo seemed to catch your eye as he continued to sing and strum gently. His voice had a gentle vibrato to it and it was mesmerizing.
It wasn’t till you felt a tap on your shoulder and you saw Wonwoo’s eyes flicker to a figure beside you that you turned to see Soonyoung offering his hand out to you. “Wanna dance?” he asked casually. You shrugged as you slipped your hands around the back of his neck. His hands awkwardly found your waist, squishing your pumpkin costume in the middle so you looked a little bit more like a squash instead.
“What happened to Jun and Seokmin?” you asked Soonyoung curiously.
“Ditched them so I could dance with you,” he shrugged.
 You had hung out with him a couple of times outside of class, mostly to study, but Soonyoung never seemed very interested in you past being a study buddy turned friend. You raised your eyebrow at him skeptically.
“I tried to ask another girl to dance,” he admitted with a sad chuckle. “But she was definitely more interested in other girls than she was in me,” Soonyoung chuckled quietly. “Plus you looked kinda silly, a giant pumpkin standing by itself in front of the stage.” You turned around, eyes wide, to realize that you were in fact the only person who was on the dance floor alone. Hansol had gone off to the kitchen to find Seokmin and Seungkwan was somewhere outside playing a drinking game. Soonyoung must have noticed your embarrassment because he was quick to continue speaking. 
“Don’t worry,” Soonyoung continued. “I too would be transfixed if it seemed like a hot singer was singing right at me.” You felt yourself blush at his comment. 
“Shut up Soonyoung,” you chastised. “Or else I’ll tell Wonwoo you think he’s hot.” “Game respects game,” Soonyoung chuckled with a shake of his head and leaned in to speak near your ear. You could hear the smirk in his voice. “Don’t believe me?” You shook your head no in response. “His eyes haven’t left you since we started dancing.”
Sure enough, Wonwoo was still watching the pair of you as you gently swayed to the melody. The song came to a close soon after and Soonyoung jokingly twirled you away from him before whispering “Go get ‘em, tiger.”
You found yourself stunned as he walked away and turned back to the stage just in time to see Wonwoo set his guitar in its case before hopping down in front of you. Without his guitar slung in front of him, you could see his outfit better. He wore a black turtleneck that clung nicely to his toned chest and arms and black slacks. Wire framed glasses sat on his face and from here you could tell how thick the lenses were. The only Halloween-y part of his outfit were the devil horns that sat on his head… which he promptly removed. Even with his hair disheveled and the glow of sweat on his skin, he looked good. He ran his hands through his dark hair and took a sip of his water, not once breaking eye contact with you. It felt a little intense, really, and even more so when you realized you couldn’t read anything from his gaze.
“You guys are really good,” you offered with a smile that you hoped didn’t come off too eager, afraid to scare him off. “I really liked that last song.”
The corner of his lip twitched upwards in a flicker that you might have missed if you weren’t studying his face so closely. It felt satisfying, in a way, and almost like a challenge. How could you get a full smile? His quiet “Thanks,” lingered in the air between the two of you. Was he this reserved around everyone else, or was there something about you that made him feel as nervous as you did? 
“You’re in my psych class, right?” Did he already forget or was he just looking for a way to continue the conversation? You played along, wondering if his cold demeanor was just hiding a nervous guy.
“Yeah I am,” you confirmed, recalling the conversation from earlier. “I sit next to the idiot.” Wonwoo’s lips turned upwards in amusement as he processed your reference and he nodded.
“Cool,” he said simply. He didn’t say anything else, but he made no move to leave either, so you tried your best to continue the conversation.
“When–”
“We–” 
Wonwoo finally let out an amused scoff. You figured that’s the closest you’d get to a genuine laugh, and it was enough to put your nerves at ease for the time being. “Go ahead,” you said.
“We’re playing at another party here in two weeks if you want to come,” he said cooly, but the way his fingers fidgeted around the plastic water bottle as if it was the neck of his guitar made you think he might be thinking about this conversation as hard as you. 
“Sure, I–” you paused as you thought about the date. “Wouldn’t that be November already?”
A scoff escaped his lips again. “Yeah, some stupid shit about a post-Halloween soiree leading into no-nut-November. A gig is a gig, I guess.” He sounded less than amused about the theme of the party but shrugged it off.
You laughed at the stupidity of it all. “Sure, yeah, I’ll try to come by.” 
You smiled at him. He smiled back at you, well, smirked more like. “Cool,” was all he said.
A buzz from your wrist caught your attention, reminding you that it was nearing 1 a.m. and that you had told yourself to go home to study for your exam. You looked back up at Wonwoo apologetically. “Sorry,” you began. “I have to get home, I want to study before tomorrow.”
Wonwoo hummed in acknowledgement and you wondered when he found time to study for his own classes. He nodded towards the door, offering to walk you out. He didn’t really say much until you were both at the front porch of the house, with the cool autumn breeze seeping through the felt of your costume. “I’ll see you around?” he asked.
You nodded in response. “See you around.”
“Cool,” he said again. You moved to begin walking home but turned back with a smile and a two finger salute when you heard him say “Nice costume, by the way.” You had a feeling he wasn’t going to say that to Seungkwan or Chan.
Sure enough, the next time you saw Wonwoo was after your psychology exam the next morning. 
You had woken up at your desk after falling asleep studying with only 20 minutes until class began. With no other options, you quickly brushed your teeth and washed your face but ran out of your apartment without bothering to change out of your pajamas.  
Last night after coming home from the party, you found it difficult to focus on your notes. All you could think about was Wonwoo and his piercing stare. You’d definitely seen his eyes before, but being the subject of their gaze was something else entirely. You recalled the feeling in the pit of your stomach the first time he looked at you. It wasn’t until your phone buzzed with a text from Hansol stating that he made it home safely that you snapped out of your daze enough to begin studying. 
You arrived just in time for the test to begin, but too late to sit in your usual seat by Chan and Soonyoung. Panting, as you slid into the first available seat, you grumbled at the way you could feel your pajama pants awkwardly riding up your calves and the slight glimmer of sweat that seemed to now layer over your forehead. You’ve definitely seen better days.
Even now, in the middle of the exam, a question about the misattributed signs of attraction had you thinking back to Wonwoo. Talk about real life applications. Elevated heartbeat, shortness of breath… it definitely wasn’t stress or fear that had you feeling that way around him. You let out a sigh as you circled the letter C.
When the exam was finally over, you met the two of them outside of the classroom.
“No, you idiot,” Soonyoung argued. “You’re thinking of the halo effect, the answer was the reciprocal liking effect.” They were in the middle of arguing about what the correct answer on a part of the exam was and you watched Chan scramble to pull his messy notebook out of his backpack to find it in his notes. Before you could interrupt and correct them, a low voice beat you to it.
“It’s the mere exposure effect, you dumbasses,” You turned around with a chuckle, turning to see Wonwoo, standing a little too close, right behind you. You could smell the cologne he wore, something that must be out of your price range. He wore a crisp white t-shirt and black sweatpants and you felt slightly embarrassed at your own pajama pants-hoodie-bedhead combo.
“Huh?” Chan asked as he tried to skim through his notes. “But isn’t that–”
“Mere exposure suggests that the more times we encounter someone or something, the more we tend to like it,” you explained. Wonwoo nodded in agreement. Something about getting his validation made your heart skip a beat.
“Looks like the studying paid off,” he commented, turning to face you with the faintest hint of a smirk. Was he teasing you?
“Sure did,” you replied with confidence, though you found yourself blushing under his gaze.
“Take a nap,” Wonwoo suggested, looking you up and down. “You look like shit.” His deadpan tone almost made you miss the mischievous glint behind his eyes. You turned to him with a sharp eye before you realized that was his attempt at witty banter. Instead of a scowl, you rolled your eyes instead.
“What every person wants to hear at 9 in the morning,” you shot back. “I’ll nap after this one buys me a coffee.” You gestured to Chan who had now turned back to Soonyoung to argue about a different question. Wonwoo scoffed as he watched the two bicker before turning to the voice that called his name from behind. It was Mingyu and Seungcheol.
“See you around,” he said before heading in their direction. You watched as Mingyu clapped a hand on his back and Seungcheol offer him some of his pack of Oreos as they retreated down the hallway. What an interesting friend group, you thought to yourself.
You didn’t see Wonwoo much after that day. Or Chan for that matter. 
For the next few classes, Chan and Wonwoo left rather promptly to have band practice in preparation for their early November gig. So those days, you found yourself walking to the library with Soonyoung.
“I haven’t seen Chan have to go to practice this often since the summer,” you had remarked to him as you walked. The party was tomorrow night, and Chan and Wonwoo skipped class altogether for rehearsal so you promised to send Chan your notes.
“Yeah,” Soonyoung agreed as he brushed a fallen leaf off the top of his hair, ruffling it in the process. “But apparently they have a new song on their setlist, so I guess that’s why.”
“A new song,” you echoed, half listening. Your mind wandered back to the image of Wonwoo on stage, the way he played, how he held onto the microphone. It must be some song if they’re practicing so hard. If he wrote a song would it be as complex and enigmatic as he seemed to be? Or would it be something completely unlike him?
“You’re doing it again,” Soonyoung’s teasing tone cut you out of your thoughts. He snapped a finger in front of your face. “You’ve been spacing out a lot lately. It was cute at first, but now it’s concerning.”
You groaned at his accusation. “I’m not spacing out,” you huffed.
“Right…” He grinned mischievously. “So who is it? Tell me so I can give you my stamp of approval.”
Something flipped in your stomach as you rolled your eyes at your friend. “Focus on your own love life, Soonyoung. Anyway, you said Chan told you about it?”
He raised a teasing eyebrow before raising his hands in defense, allowing you to change the subject. “Yeah, he did,” he confirmed. “And what about it?”
You were surprised to learn that Soonyoung had a conversation with Chan past arguing over class notes, and you noted the shade of red that dusted the tops of his ears when he saw you look at him inquisitively. “Nothing,” you replied coyly. “Just glad to see you guys are friends now.” Soonyoung rolled his eyes and you shoved him playfully. He shook his head with a soft laugh.
“I guess if I have to see him every day, we might as well be friends,” Soonyoung admitted. “Mere exposure effect or whatever.”
“Aw, you are learning, Soonyoung.” 
The next evening you found yourself at yet another frat house in front of another stage. At least this time you weren’t in a pumpkin costume, but rather in an actual outfit that you felt good about (One that wasn’t picked out by any of your friends).
You managed to arrive in time to catch the band setting up, wanting to offer help, but not really knowing how. Instead you sat on the couch beside a bored looking Hansol as he fiddled with the cup in his hands. 
“Most people don’t show up to parties until they’re actually parties,” Hansol sighed as he rested his chin in his hands. You watched as Chan fiddled with the tuning pegs of his guitar in front of Wonwoo who played him his pitches on the keyboard. You chuckled in agreement. There really wasn’t much going on quite yet as the party had yet to truly begin.
“We could have come by later in the evening,” you replied.
“Nah,” Hansol countered. “I’m bored, but I’d rather be bored here with you and the band than bored alone at home. Plus this way everyone knows I’m ‘with the band’ or whatever. Keeps weirdos away from my cousin.” As if to prove his point, he sent a glare towards the poor girl who walked up and offered Seungcheol a water bottle. He had a point. He at least had a loose reason to be here early, but did you?
You could say that Hansol dragged you here with him, but he didn’t really. You weren’t really “with the band” either. You looked back over at the stage and caught Wonwoo’s eye. He gave you a single wave. You’d leveled up from last week’s curt nod, you realized with a soft chuckle. You continued to watch as he returned his attention to his microphone stand. Maybe, you thought, it was reason enough that you liked seeing the band set up.
By the time No Name got to the middle of their set, you were having a great time dancing with Hansol who was more than buzzed. You also felt a little tipsy, but you were nowhere near Hansol’s level. One of you had to be sober enough to care for the other. Wonwoo cleared his throat into the mic before speaking. “This is a new song. Happy Halloween and no-nut-November.” Although his face remained passive, you could tell now that Wonwoo was poking fun at the drunk frat boys that were scattered about and cheering loudly.
Hansol leaned over to you as a keyboard melody began to play. “Chan said you’d probably like this one,” He slurred into your ear. You winced at the volume of his voice and the smell of beer. He’d regret this in the morning.
I wish that you and I lived in The Sims We could build a house and plant some flowers and have kids But we’re both at some trashy Halloween party downtown
Wonwoo let his bass hang around his neck as he wrapped both of his hands around his microphone and leaned in close, as if his proximity to the microphone could fill the room with a sense of intimacy.
I wish that we lived on a VHS I'd erase the things I said and that I'll probably say again Hit rewind on all the times I got lost in my head
Hansol was right, and you were pleased to know that your many years of knowing Chan paid off in him knowing your taste in music. You wondered if he had any influence in writing it and you made a mental note to ask him about it some other time. It was a different vibe than some of the songs the band played last time you saw them, but the crowd seemed to enjoy it and so did you.
The rest of the set was filled with songs that were familiar to you – songs you heard at the last show, and songs that you’d heard Chan practice when you came to visit him, Seungkwan, and Hansol at their apartment. Same as last time, the set closed with a slower song, but with no real interest in slow dancing with each other, you and Hansol stumbled out to the backyard instead, opting for some fresh air. In the moonlight, you could see the red glow that rose in his cheeks, a side effect of the alcohol. Knowing him, he was on the verge of falling asleep and you were thankful that Chan would be finished with his set soon and could deal with him instead. Seungkwan had cleverly avoided going to this party, leaving you and to care for their roommate instead. As much as you loved your friend, Hansol became a deadweight when he was drunk, as if all his muscles became laced with actual iron. 
As if on cue, the final strum of the song rang out and soon after, Chan plopped down between you and a sleeping Hansol. He scoffed at the sight, laughing at Hansol’s soft snores. He pulled out his phone to take a photo of him in his peaceful state and you laughed softly.
“You know he’ll kill you tomorrow morning once he sees that,” you warned him. Chan chuckled and shook his head as he reached under Hansol’s back to pull him into a more comfortable sitting position and he murmured a quiet thank you. It was hard to believe that in any other square inch of this party there were frat boys throwing up on the grass when a scene as soft and gentle was playing out right in front of you.
“Eh,” Chan shrugged carefully, assessing his friend’s state. “I think I can take a hungover Hansol.” He smiled as he patted him on the crown of his head before looking back towards you. “Did you drink tonight?” Chan asked curiously.
You nodded and reached your hand up to feel how warm your cheeks had gotten from the alcohol. “Not nearly as much as Sol,” you answered.
“Do you have a ride?” Chan asked, concern lacing his voice. “I didn’t drive today.”
“I was just planning on walking back,” you shrugged your shoulders. Chan’s brows furrowed together in thought.
“If Seungkwan’s around, you should ask him to walk with you,” Chan suggested. “Or I guess that tiger-wannabe dumbass. He’s fine, I guess.” You laughed at Chan’s mention of Soonyoung.
“I didn’t even know they came,” you admitted.
“They showed up kinda late,” Chan explained. “I saw them show up towards the end of the set.” You hummed in response.
“I’ll keep an eye out then,” you promised as you turned away. “You sure you don’t need my help?” You glanced at Hansol who was now starting to tip to the side as Chan shook his head and waved you away.
“Text me when you get home!”
Back inside the house, the sounds of the band had been replaced with someone’s playlist blasting over the speakers. After doing a lap around the house, your two other friends were nowhere to be found. You knew you were hitting the end of your own social battery as you approached the kitchen in search for a water bottle to take with you before heading out. Although you didn’t drink as much as Hansol did, the warmth in your throat reminded you that it would be a smart idea to start hydrating. You immediately headed for the cooler that was propped on the counter and dug through the ice and cans of beer until you found what you needed. You wiped your hand against the fabric of your top, trying to regain feeling in your cold fingers before you heard a familiar voice call your name.
“Wonwoo,” you smiled at him in greeting. Today he wore a simple gray sweater with black jeans, and you wondered if he owned anything colorful in his closet. “You guys killed it today.”
Wonwoo’s eyes lit up ever so slightly at the compliment. “Thanks,” he began, and you wondered if that’s all he’d say. “We practiced a lot.”
“And it paid off,” you agreed, opening your water to take a sip. “I really liked that new song.”
You noted how Wonwoo’s mouth twitched into a small smile. “Really?” he asked.
“Yeah,” you nodded enthusiastically. “It’s right up my alley, and I liked the lyrics too.”
That answer seemed to please Wonwoo who turned his head to hide a gentle blush that crept up his cheeks before clearing his throat to change the subject. “Not drinking tonight?” Wonwoo nodded at the water bottle in your hands.
“I drank plenty,” you chuckled. “It’s for my walk home.”
“You’re walking home?” Wonwoo repeated. “Where’s Chan?”
“Chan?” you echoed as Wonwoo nodded. “He’s dealing with a drunk sleeping Hansol. I told him I'd go with Seungkwan or Soonyoung, but I can’t seem to find either of them.”
Wonwoo hummed as you explained. A beat of silence fell between the two of you as he looked around, lost in his own thoughts. “I’ll help you find them,” he offered with a quieter voice before nodding towards the stairs. For a moment, you hesitated and wondered why he was offering at all. Wonwoo didn’t seem like the type to go out of his way to help someone who was effectively still a stranger. Maybe he wasn’t as cold and distant as he tried to make himself out to be.
You followed close behind him struggling to shove your way through the crowd until you realized Wonwoo had stretched his hand behind him to grab hold of your wrist. “Stay close,” he called to you. You wished you could read the stoic expression that remained fixed on his gaze, but everything about him seemed so… calculated, down to the way his fingers lightly brushed against your wrist as he guided you through the crowd. 
Honestly, It was a pleasant surprise that he had offered to help you at all. Half of you expected him to just reply with a simple “cool,” as what seemed to be his default response, and be done with it. Instead, he was dragging you up the stairs and shoving people out of the way on your behalf. You blushed as you realized what this might look like to the random onlooker. The two of you must have looked like any other couple at a frat party, headed upstairs to do something unsavory.
Before you could relish the idea any longer, Wonwoo dropped your hand as he found a clearing by the railing at the upstairs landing where there was a decent view of the party going on downstairs. “It’s easier to find someone when you have a bird’s-eye view,” he explained as his eyes scanned over the sea of partygoers.
You turned your attention to where he was looking before spotting Seungkwan’s blonde hair and Soonyoung’s silvery white hair, both unmistakable from your point of view. “There they are,” you noted excitedly. Wonwoo scoffed in amusement at how a simple observation got you so excited. “It looks like Seungkwan’s… occupied,” you chuckled to yourself. Seungkwan in the middle of belting out a Whitney Houston song by a karaoke machine. You decided you’d best not bother him and sighed in relief when you saw Soonyoung was just chatting idly with Jun near the door. 
Wonwoo walked with you back down the stairs until you found Soonyoung, who smiled and greeted you with a hug. “Hey, stranger.” He turned to Wonwoo with a polite, but distant wave. “Hey b-” he cleared his throat, correcting himself. “Hey Wonwoo.”
A scoff escaped Wonwoo’s lips as they formed into a smirk. “Hey, Hochi-Mochi.” Soonyoung’s face immediately fell into a frown. 
“Only my mom– how do you even know about that?” Soonyoung ran a hand down his face as Jun laughed beside him.
“You leave your brightness all the way up when you text your mom from your laptop in class,” Wonwoo explained with a casual shrug, much to Soonyoung’s dismay. “And you have the default font size of a billboard ad.” 
Jun put a hand on Soonyoung’s shoulder and shook his head in laughter. “I’m gonna go ahead, Hochi-Mochi. See you around.” He waved goodbye at the three of you before disappearing into the crowd.
“Et tu, Brute?” Soonyoung grumbled as he watched you laugh along. “On that note, I think I’m gonna go too,”
Wonwoo watched your hand as it flew up to grab Soonyoung’s elbow as he turned away. “Wait,” you sighed as your laughter died down. “I was gonna ask if you could walk me home, since Chan and Seungkwan are otherwise occupied.”
Soonyoung’s eyebrow shot up as his eyes moved between your hand that tugged at his sleeve and the steely dark eyes that seemed to be intensely watching his next move. He paused for a second before finally answering you. His face had slipped into an expression that you couldn’t quite read. “I don’t mind but–”
“I’m Mingyu’s designated driver, and he lives like a half hour away,” Wonwoo seemed to answer Soonyoung’s question before it even came out. Would he have offered otherwise? you thought to yourself. You turned your gaze to Wonwoo, still unreadable as ever, and wondered why he answered so quickly.
“I see,” Soonyoung replied skeptically before turning to you with a shrug. “I’m ready whenever you are.”
You nodded to Soonyoung and the three of you walked towards the door where Wonwoo hung back and leaned against the door frame as you moved past him. You weren’t sure if you were on hugging terms with Wonwoo yet (or if he even had hugging terms for that matter), so you opted to give him a wave instead.
“See you around?” you smiled at Wonwoo warmly, hoping to mask the rush of nervousness that seemed to flood through you every time you were the subject of his gaze. His eyes lingered on yours for a moment longer and for a brief second, they softened, in a way that seemed to melt away his icy exterior that you’d thought was unbreakable. 
“See you around,” was all he said, but the three words seemed to carry more weight – a promise that something was beginning. This time, there was no mistaking it. 
His eyes definitely softened.
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syluss-karaoke-teacher ¡ 5 months ago
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Hello first timer here. May I please request for The 4 LADS with a selective mute MC wherein MC finally says their names for the first time ever
Hello to my first ever request!! ☆*: .。. o(≧▽≦)o .。.:*☆ Very interesting, I have never tried this one before! I did some research and hope I can do it justice ^^
HCs under the cut for Xavier, Zayne, Rafayel, Sylus
Content: SFW, fluff, mild canon spoilers in Zayne's part (main storyline released thus far), reader is MC, gender neutral MC, use of petnames for MC, selective mutism (which also means a slight canon divergence), early stages of a romantic relationship, no "y/n"
Sylus's is a bit different as I think his and MC's relationship would look the most different in the early stages since there's the whole "can't resonate with you if I despite you" angle, which wouldn't at the very least be *helped* by MC's condition pfft.
If you see any mistakes contradicting the above info, or if you find this disrespectful in any way, please let me know!
LADS LIs with a selectively mute MC
Xavier
Xavier, who isn't very talkative himself, falls in sync with you quite fast after you meet. At first you are wary of his intense gaze and the extended silence it carries as he observes you from a comfortable distance. But one day, you begin to look back at him, if only out of defiance, and that's when you start noticing.
Small head movements to question or to confirm, taps on the table and later on your arm or shoulder. Text messages with lots of emojis, shared playlists for different moods. And if all else fails, a gentle squeeze of your hand, to let your Evol do the talking for you.
He has been listening all along.
In comes one of those days. The mission goes well, but you are left dead tired, barely able to make it to your apartment. Xavier escorts you home, and as he wishes you goodnight, you grab his sleeve. Whatever emotion is showing on your face is enough to make him melt, and he turns back around, petting your hair.
"Got it, got it," he chuckles and lets himself be led to the couch, where you snuggle against him after putting on a random cartoon on the TV.
He is warm, and his hoodie is soft against your cheek. You listen to his slowing heartbeats as his eyelids begin to droop, his arm a solid anchor around your shoulders. At that moment you realize that this is how you want all of your missions to end: in this safe, comforting warmth.
"Xavier?" you call out, twiddling with the pullstrings of his hoodie. He stirs against you and lets out a questioning hum. You lift your head to look him in the eyes, and see them shining with something you dare to hope is adoration. He tightens his arm around you and patiently waits.
"Thank you," you finally decide to tell him, knowing that he knows it's about much more than today's mission.
"Think nothing of it, starlight," he murmurs and rests his forehead against yours.
Zayne
You forgot that Zayne knows. Of course he knows, that man doesn't forget anything, annoying as it may be sometimes. During your first appointment with him you try to bring it up, hoping that your old familiarity with him would help ease the tension. It doesn't, and in the end you have to resort to gesturing at your chart, cheeks burning in humiliation.
"I remember," Zayne tells you, his voice quiet, "don't worry about it. Just find a way that's comfortable for you."
On a rational level, it makes sense. He is a dedicated, renowned doctor who must have had first-hand experience with others like you beforehand. But on an emotional level you are on your toes for a good while. Zayne has a tendency to scold you about your heart condition, your recklessness on missions, your bad eating and sleeping habits. You just kind of... assume that this would be next on the list.
But the insistence never comes. Instead, there is a notepad and and a pen on his desk one day. The pen has a tiny snowglobe at the end that glitters prettily when you write with it. Zayne makes no mention of it when you come in, nor when you pick the pen up and start writing.
Afterwards you take that notepad everywhere you go with him. You write down your comments to him, your observations of the world around you, your feelings that are too precious to send him over text messages. You revel in the tiny upwards curl of his lips when he reads everything over, the hint of mirth in his hazel eyes that makes your heart flutter.
"Care to show me what you have written today?" he asks you one night as he is driving you back home from a restaurant. The car is standing still in traffic, and you are finishing your notes on that night's menu selection (the chocolate pudding had been especially delicious). You lean back on the passenger seat and look at his handsome profile, smiling to yourself.
"No, but I can tell you, Dr. Zayne."
You see his eyes widen in surprise and he glances at you, but before he can reply the traffic lurches forward. Zayne returns his eyes on the road, and reaches out to grab your hand in his. He rubs his thumb over your knuckles and your stomach does small flips as you see him smile.
"I'd love that."
Rafayel
"Not one to talk? That's okay cutie, I can manage for the both of us."
And that he does. At first you aren't sure if the eccentric artist even wants or needs you to talk; Rafayel can talk circles around just about anyone, rightfully smug about his captivating voice and demeanor. You find yourself being envious of his natural charm, sure that you could hardly measure up to him in this regard.
But the more you spend time with him, the more you observe his mannerisms when he talks to you (yes, to you, not just at you): the glances over his shoulder, his body turning towards you as his hands punctuate his speech. The way he cocks his head to the side and studies your face with that easy smile on his lips, reading your expressions and hums as he does. Resting his fingertips on the pulse point of your wrist and gently tucking your hair behind your ear as you fight a petulant blush under his curious eyes.
Bodyguard, bah. You aren't sure Rafayel really knows, or cares, what that job actually entails. Then again, it's not like you had to stay, yet you did. There is something mesmerizing about Rafayel, his eyes as deep as the oceans and brilliant as the galaxies, and in between scoffing at his antics or bickering with him through texts, you find yourself being pulled in further and further as if lured by a siren song.
"Do you want to learn how to paint, sunshine?"
This time he doesn't give even the slightest pretense for the date. You have long ceased to care, feeling warm but bold standing in his studio as he guides the brush in your hand across the canvas. It's raining outside, the pitter patter mixing in with the gentle swishing of your brush and his bare feet padding against the tile floor. Time seems to fly by as you recreate the azure sea in front of you.
As the rain starts to ease down and the clouds part just enough for you to see the waves again, you step in front of the floor-length window and gaze out. As you watch swaying seas, your eyes suddenly widen.
"Rafayel, come look! Dolphins!"
You don't have time to be surprised by your own reaction as he strides next to you, his hand finding the small of your back. He leans his chin on your shoulder, and you can feel his lips curling into a smile.
"Now isn't that a nice surprise," he says, "I wouldn't mind this happening again."
You nod, the words failing you once more, but he is so close he must feel your answer in your heartbeat.
Sylus
If Sylus could take it back, he would. He would destroy planets and steal stars to redo your first meeting. He wouldn't assume anything, wouldn't take out his frustrations on you, wouldn't push and push until the truth screams in his face.
Because your eyes remain vacant of any recognition, any warmth he grew to know so long ago, and he only made it worse: he forced your voice out of your mind when your mouth refused to cooperate. He took it as defiance, a personal challenge, when it was anything but. It took an outsider to tell him to stop hounding you, and he hasn't been able to forget since.
Through what can only be described as trials you finally make it to the auction and beyond, and with Sylus's help you get your hands on the Aether Core. He does not know what you see in the vision the Deepspace Tunnel shows you, but whatever it is, it creates an opening. It lets you resonate with him, lower your guard and accept his help. And Sylus holds onto that chance like a drowning man.
From then on out, every day is dedicated to making up to you. Even if his words are rough, there is now softness lacing his features whenever he looks at you. Tenderness, the origin of which you do not recognize, and yearning that makes it hard to stay mad at him.
He may not beg for forgiveness out loud, but it is there in every question, every request, every wish.
"Will you have dinner with me tonight, sweetie?"
I'm sorry I treated you like that. I didn't realize. I should have.
"Mephisto brought you two necklaces. Show him which one you prefer."
I'm sorry I expected more than you could possibly offer. It isn't your fault you don't remember.
"Text me when you get home. The roads are slippery today."
I'm sorry I made you uncomfortable.
If you only knew how I adored you, little dove.
Your phone plays a familiar tune and you pick it up to see a video call coming from Sylus. It has become a habit of his whenever you are back in Linkon. He tells you he doesn't mind to be the one talking: he just wants to see your face.
"Hello sweetie, thank you for picking up. I called to say I'm sorry for missing our movie night. Some fool tried to blow up the armory in the north and I had to oversee the clean up."
You roll your eyes and sigh in mock exasperation. Sylus smiles back at you.
"I promise to make it up to you. Just tell me what you'd like."
"Anything we do together is fine, Sylus," you tell him and watch in mild amusement as his eyebrows raise and mouth freezes mid-sentence. "And stop... stop apologizing so much. Okay?"
It's not often the leader of Onychinus is rendered speechless, and you can't help a small giggle escaping your lips. It is your time to adore him, just for a moment.
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boundbyeclipse ¡ 5 months ago
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hiii can you write smut number 5 with current James????
black velvet
genre : smut
word count : 1227
tags : current!james, female!reader, age difference (not specified how much), reader is a tattoo artist, a little rough james, semi-public sex (i think?), that’s about it
from the prompt list : 5. “don’t cover your mouth. i wanna hear you”
a/n : sooo i saw a photo of James getting a tattoo done and i thought hey, that’s a perfect idea for one of my requests! it really stuck to me and i had to write it. i really hope you enjoy this one x
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‘Poison’ by Alice Cooper played in the background after you returned from your dinner break at work. You hummed along to the lyrics while lightly bopping your head to the beat. You absolutely loved rock and metal, so the playlist used at work always consisted of bands who did exactly those genres. It always gave you motivation and boosts for some energy, no matter if you were sad, angry or irritated.
While preparing for your next client, the sound of the entrance door opening and closing reached your ears. Technically, it was just a bit too early to show up, but hey, this one’s a regular and you didn’t mind at all.
“Hey there” you greeted him while putting some black gloves on your hands.
“Hey. Mind me showing up before I should?”
You gave him a warm smile, shaking your head left to right.
“Nope. You can come take a seat actually, I’ll go print out the tattoo and get more ink”
“Alright” James smiled back, hanging his jacket on the rack and making his way to the big, comfortable leather chair. He watched you walking around and you didn’t quite pay any attention to him, at least at first. Or, you just didn’t want to.
No matter how many times you’ve done tattoos on this man in the past few years, there has always been some sort of a tension between you both. It wasn’t anything like what you’ve had before with other men. They might have complimented you, made you smile, even blush, but none of them put you in such a vulnerable position with their presence alone. And there have been many times where his eyes would pierce right through you in the middle of getting his skin drawn on, creating the impression of him wanting to do some things to you. The lust was purely emitting from him the whole time. And you cannot forget about those moments when his fingertips would brush against your skin, making you shiver and think of scenarios in your head that were not so innocent. Sure, he was much older than you, but that didn’t stop either of you from craving each other every time.
Not too long after, you were already seated next to James, with his hand extended out as you were drawing lines on his skin.
My, oh my, did those large hands of his drove you insane.
“You got any more people coming after me?” he suddenly asked, his blue eyes hinting at something.
“Nope, you are the last one today. Puts my mind at ease knowing my last client is a regular. No need to overthink”
One side of his mouth curved up into a small smirk.
“Are you sure your mind is at ease? Because I can feel you’re all tensed up”
You swallowed and bit your lower lip hard after he said that. Trying to hide your growing frustration, you giggled.
“Maybe I am, I’ve been here since seven in the morning, you know”
He cocked an eyebrow up, not quite believing what you were saying. James could clearly see how you bit your lip, adjusted in your seat and giggled due to getting thrown back by his comment.
“It’s kind of easy to tell that it’s not because of the work. You don’t need to hide it”
Your breath hitched in your throat, and your body froze for a moment before you looked up at him and asked.
“What do you mean?”
“I know you secretly think about all the possible ways I could use my hands on you,” you could not believe what he just said, but it was totally true, “it’s written all over your face. Even your body language gives it away with how you shake, squirm in your seat, how you breathe heavier when I’m around. I know you think of me”
“James, don’t-“
“Just finish the tattoo first, then you can explain yourself”
Not even ten minutes later, you had your body pinned against the door of your break room, with no way to escape the tall man who hovered over you. His hands roamed your body while he kissed your neck, sucking on the sensitive spots to make you even weaker. The way he held you by your hip against the door made you so vulnerable and so turned on, that you could not help but moan into the heated kiss.
With one swift move, James opened the door behind you and the both of you walked backwards, still all over each other until the back of your calves hit the lounge couch that was in the room. James helped you with taking your shirt off, leaving you in a black lace bra. You sat down and watched James from below, eyes full of desperation and need, looking right into his own. He removed his shirt and tossed it away, unbuckling his jeans and unzipping them, then hovering above you as he laid you down slowly, but with rough kisses and a tight grip on your waist.
Your hand reached into his jeans and you cupped him through the fabric of his underwear, giving it a couple squeezes as James groaned in response. He was big, thick and hard, and you could feel yourself getting so wet that it started to hurt. You really needed him.
With no clothes left on your bodies, he was now inside you, moving his hips as he watched your face, loving the way your eyes rolled back with each thrust. The way your back arched, your naked bodies touching against each other, it put you in such a trance. Every second of it - you just loved.
With your moans becoming louder, you felt a little embarrassed, and your hand found its way to your mouth to silence yourself. But James wasn’t going to let you hide.
“Don’t cover your mouth. I wanna hear you”
Carefully, he took your hand and now had both of your hands pinned above your head. Your moans filled the room as you wrapped your legs around his waist, wanting to feel every single inch of his length in you. Almost to the point where you could barely take it.
“I can’t- I can’t take it”
“Yes, you can. Just hang on for a little bit more for me, okay?”
You gave him a nod in response, eyes watery and lips parted as you breathed heavily, your high hitting you right then and there. It happened so quickly, that you could not even tell James that you were close.
Another moan slipped out of his mouth as you coated him in your juices, your walls pulsing whilst he was still inside you, able to feel everything.
“Almost there” he told you as he gave you his final thrusts before pulling out and cumming on your stomach. Both of you were panting, with small beads of sweat on your foreheads and hair all messed up. But as soon as you got your breathing back to normal, it was time to clean up and go home. Though, James just wasn’t quite keen on leaving you so soon.
“I’ll give you a ride back home, so don’t worry about taking a bus in this weather” he gave you a warm smile as he put his jacket on and waited for you at the entrance door.
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vacantfields ¡ 1 year ago
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Things Are Better AU MASTER POST!
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Tags used: Things Are Better AU | TAB AU | TAB AU Answers | TAB AU Writing | TAB AU Sun | TAB AU Moon | TAB AU Eclipse |
AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vacantfields
TAB AU: Singing Voices Spotify Playlist
YOU ARE ALLOWED TO: Draw, Write, etc with these guys! (ASK ABOUT NSFW !)(AND remember to credit me!!)
(I will attempt to use the tags as best as i can!! Do also note that things can change in this AU but this is the best place you can go look honestly)
[ In this AU, Sun, Eclipse, and Moon have gotten new bodies, some that are way more humanoid. Technically, they are not animatronics anymore, but the Pizzaplex they live at still deems them as such! They are also all separated; most importantly, THEY ARE NOT BROTHERS. They are best friends! (Sun and Moon, however, seem closer than that.) ]
[ It is set in the 20XX! The date doesn't matter. ]
[ The Location of this thriving Pizzaplex is in the heart of a big city, and the rest of the animatronics have gotten slight upgrades but have remained the same. Sun and Moon still run the Daycare. Eclipse stands as the security guard for the Daycare (Moon also still goes on patrols, as well). They live in the Daycare too! The layout is (sorta) the same as the original Pizzaplex. The boys can leave the place, but they must tell their handler or whoever runs the place how long they will be gone. The virus from the game is not here, BUT a virus is in this! It's highly aggressive and should be avoided at all costs. Moon used to have a virus, but most got removed from him when they moved into these bodies, although some of the virus remains in his code. Eclipse has a different virus embedded in him, and he cannot remember how he acted before; it basically wiped his personality, so now he's somewhat unpredictable. ]
They have humanoid/android bodies
The original body along with their personality chips were created in the middle of the 90s
Moon got his virus in 95 or so but they couldn't fully remove it as they would have to reset him and thats a chore plus it wasn't too dangerous so they moved the guys into separate bodies and it fixed most of it
the story is set in 20XX
The location is in a big city
They have been in the new bodies for around 5 years
The fire, gregory, etc. Did not happen here!
The virus Eclipse was made by some people who wanted to use the animatronics to attack people and make sure that fazbear would shut down
They are not the same guys from the game BUT they do act a lot like them! (kinda)
They used to share a body (Eclipse just being a security setting in them)
Moon has remains of a violent virus
Eclipse has the virus embedded in his code
Eclipse cannot remember who he was before the virus
The virus is not sentient... OR... Is it?
Despite not having the virus, Sun is not handling being alone in his head. His unstable and unused security program snaps in when he has breakdowns and makes his head think it's Moon talking to him.
Sun was the first personality chip then it was Moon and then Eclipse
Other facts
The virus does NOT like the color red on bodies. (Do not wear a red shirt or anything alike that around Eclipse he will attack and KILL.)(Though if they care about you he will hold back from mauling)
They cannot eat BUT! They can taste things!
Their face plates can still spin
They can still use the wire to "fly" around if they wish
They have a secondary voice box that they use for when they talk with people outside of the Daycare/or go out!
In the Daycare they use the "Canon" voice
They can also perform at "Adult Nights" at the pizzaplex, which consists of them singing on stage while the adults drink and so on.
Moon is the only one who actively performs so you can catch him in the evenings on stage!
They are all very flexible... And they can dance (;
They can also talk with each other through a shared headspace (like a group chat)
The old body is stored somewhere in the plex
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⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊ SUN ⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊
He/They/We | 8'5" / 256cm | Daycare Attendant
[ Sun is a happy go lucky guy who hides a lot of his other emotions and sometimes they tumble in! He gets angry, he gets sassy, he gets upset, etc. !! ]
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Secondary Voice (singing):
Without A Whisper | Sleepless Deathbed | Reverie
(Invent Animate)
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⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ MOON ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
He/They/We | 8'5" / 256cm | Naptime Attendant / Performer
[ Moon is your day to day gremlin. Crawling up walls and spider-walking across the floor in the darkness. Though he does easily get flustered if youre close enough to him! ]
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Secondary Voice (singing):
Secret Scream | That Death Cannot Touch | No Accusations
(The Black Queen)
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☾✴ ๋࣭ ⭑ ECLIPSE ☾✴ ๋࣭ ⭑
He/They/We | 9'4" / 284cm | Security for the Daycare
[ Eclipse is a wild card. You never know if you can trust what comes out of his mouth but he seems docile for now ]
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Secondary Voice (singing):
Broken Inside | Forevermore | Clouded Son
(Broken Iris)
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(Hopefully this made some sort of sense... I will probably edit here and there but (: !!)
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wchswift ¡ 3 months ago
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ଓ Soundtrack of Us
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Pairing: Dean Winchester x fem!reader
Summary: basically a drabble about you and dean having different tastes in rock but still enjoying it together.
Word count: 778
a/n: I've been a bit inactive and busy because of work and life in general, so I haven't been able to write as much 😭 but I had this self-indulgent idea and I decided to write it :3 (and just a note: I know dean and his "restricted" taste for hair metal is more exclusive to the early seasons and you see his musical taste expand over time, but I wrote this with s1 dean in mind so... sorry if this is kind of out of character)
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Dean’s hand rested easy on the steering wheel, his other arm stretched over the back of the seat. His fingers brushed your shoulder now and then, not like he was trying, but like he couldn’t help it. The Impala purred beneath you like a contented lion, the rumble vibrating through the soles of your boots.
Outside, the road stretched long and dark, a canvas painted in streaks of asphalt and moonlight. Inside, the car was alive with the unmistakable riff of AC/DC’s Back in Black.
“You seriously don’t get tired of this song?” you teased, shooting him a side glance.
Dean smirked, his green eyes glinting in the dim light of the dash. “Tired? Sweetheart, this is a classic. It’s practically a religious experience.”
You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the small smile tugging at your lips. “It’s good, I’ll give you that. But, you know, there’s more to rock than screaming guitars and pounding drums.”
“Oh, here we go,” Dean groaned playfully, leaning back in his seat. “Let me guess, you’re about to hit me with Livin’ on a Prayer again.”
You laughed, the sound bright and warm in the intimate space of the car. You rummaged through your bag, fishing out your MP3 player. “Don’t knock it! Bon Jovi knew how to tell a story. And don’t even get me started on Queen. Freddie Mercury was a genius.”
Dean grunted, mock-offended. “Yeah, yeah. Freddie was great. I can't exactly disagree... but where’s the grit? The soul? The blood, sweat, and beers?” He gestured to the stereo. “Metallica, Black Sabbath—they’re the heartbeat of rock.”
“Don’t get me wrong,” you said, scrolling through your playlist. “I like some grit. But music doesn’t always have to be about rebellion and rage. Sometimes, it’s about finding beauty in the chaos.”
Dean shot you a look, a slow grin spreading across his face. “Beauty in chaos, huh? That’s pretty deep for a Bon Jovi fan.”
You lightly punched his arm, and he chuckled, the sound low and warm. “Watch it, Winchester,” you warned, but there was no heat in your words.
As the AC/DC track came to an end, you grabbed his box of tapes under the dash rifling through them until you found some of your additions.
The familiar opening chords of Somebody to Love filled the Impala, and you turned the volume up. Dean groaned dramatically.
“Oh, come on,” he protested. “Not this one!”
“Yes, this one!” you countered, swaying in your seat to the rhythm. “Admit it, you love it.”
“Do not.”
“Do too,” you shot back, grinning as you sang along with Freddie’s soaring vocals, tapping his knee in time with the beat. “Just give it a chance.”
Dean’s lips twitched as he tried to suppress a smile. He failed miserably. “Fine,” he relented, tapping his fingers on the steering wheel in an almost reluctant rhythm. “It’s not the worst.”
You gasped in mock horror. “Not the worst? Dean Winchester, you’re practically a fan.”
“Don’t push your luck,” he said, but the affection in his tone was unmistakable.
The song swelled, filling the car with its operatic grandeur, and for a moment, neither of you spoke. It wasn’t just music anymore; it was a bridge between your two worlds, a shared heartbeat in the quiet night.
As the final notes faded, Dean reached over and took your hand, his thumb brushing against your knuckles.
“You’re annoying, you know that?” he murmured, his voice soft.
You grinned, leaning into him. “And yet, you keep me around.”
Dean’s eyes flicked to yours, warm and unguarded. “Damn right, I do.”
For the rest of the drive, the two of you traded songs—Metallica melting into The Smiths, Bon Jovi tangling with Led Zeppelin. By the time you pulled into the motel parking lot, the playlist had turned into something uniquely yours, a messy, beautiful mashup of everything you both loved.
Dean turned off the engine, and for a moment, the world went quiet. He leaned back in his seat and looked over at you, his face softer than you’d seen it all day.
“Guess it doesn’t matter what we listen to,” he said quietly. “As long as it’s with you.”
You felt something catch in your chest, something warm and good. Leaning across the seat, you kissed him, your hand brushing against the back of his neck. “Same here, Dean. Same here.”
He smiled against your lips, the kind of smile that didn’t need words.
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𖤐 reblogs and feedback are appreciated! requests are also welcome, ty!
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slytherinshua ¡ 3 months ago
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༄ A FLAME'S OCEAN ( 최지웅 )
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genre avatar the last airbender au , fluff/comfort , established marriage , fire lord!jiung x water tribe princess!reader   cw war between nations , kissing , not proofread   wc 1328   request for my baby @blue-jisungs who wanted a jiung fic in return for a tae fic 🤲🤲🤲 i have delivered   note idk why i always fall back to atla aus BUT I AM NOT COMPLAINING i could fr write these forever i just love the atla world so much it's so nice for fics. also writing this was super nostalgic all the feels from writing my old wonwoo fic coming back cause i was listening to the same playlist i did back then <//3   net @kstrucknet
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Fire and water. Constantly in disagreement with each other. Constantly fighting with each other. Yet, they still possessed components vital for the other’s survival. The oxygen in water fed a fire’s flame. The heat produced from that flame could change the structure of the water, from ice to boiling. Fire and water, despite their differences, were able to work together. 
Jiung was your fire. Burning with a passion hotter than any you had ever seen. Jiung lived for perfection, for ambition, for achievements. He could do anything, warming even the coldest of places and people with his blaze. The people looked up to him, adored him, but also asked too much of him. With a broken Fire Nation stricken from a hundred year war, there was much to rebuild, and countless problems to face along the way. 
Jiung was strong, but you could tell when the pressure started to get to him. As a Water tribe princess, your very existence as his wife defied the rules of the old world. It marked the change, the unity, the peace that Jiung hoped to bring to the entire country. You were both still young, but it was exactly the hope the people needed and craved for that only the youth possessed. Innovative minds, creative thinking, new ideas; from them, the heart of the nation was coming back to life.
Fighting alongside Jiung was quite different from calling yourself his wife. It was a title you still had to get used to. There was a humility you were used to in the Water Tribe. Because of the close-knit community, your role as princess wasn’t very different from the neighbouring market vendor. Everyone knew you, and you knew everyone. The Tribe was just that small.
The Fire Nation seemed almost endless to you. Vast, overpopulated, busy. You knew on the day of your wedding that you’d have to rule in quite a different way than you were used to. A nation afflicted with mistrust and grief needed to be carefully sewn back together at the seams. Trust and community had to be built before prosperity could blossom. 
Jiung focused on the communities directly affected by the war. The families that had lost their men. The homes that had been destroyed. Immense guilt filled his body at the sight of them, and he hoped to rebuild everything better than it was before the war. 
You focused on connections with the other nations. It was easy for union between the Fire Nation and Water Tribe given your marriage. You were a beacon of light for the Earth Kingdom. Seeing someone of such background work in harmony with the Fire Lord was inspiring. It wasn’t easy to persuade people, but through your hard work, they were slowly starting to see the possibilities of an era of peace. 
It was late at night and the warm Summer air was carried by the breeze through the open curtains of the terrace decorating your bedchambers. Dressed in light silk robes, taking down your hair from the day, you sighed. You had just gotten back from the Earth Kingdom after weeks of stay. You had missed Jiung, who continued to be one of the only people who understood your hard work and struggle. You had missed the Fire Nation, which you had just started to feel was your home. You had missed the warmth and the hope that the air of the Fire Nation carried. Although you were making progress with the Earth Kingdom, you still had a long way to go. 
Jiung wasn’t back yet. He had been working on the outskirts of the city the last time you heard from him. Handling the impoverished, the broken, the injured. You knew it was going to be the hardest area to build back up. Not only were the people the most affected by the war— they never had much. You were worried Jiung’s gestures would be viewed as insincere. You trusted your husband nonetheless. If there was anyone who could build back a nation from destruction, it was him.
You fell down onto the soft pillows, immediately nuzzling your face closer to Jiung’s side, missing his scent, his warmth, his smile. A smile crept onto your face before you knew it as soon as you heard familiar footsteps outside the door. You lifted your head as the door swung open, and your handsome, albeit tired, husband stepped through. You noticed how he visibly relaxed at the sight of you. It had been lonely without you for almost a month.
“Welcome home, my love,” he sighed, a smile on his face. He produced a small flame in his palm, sending it to light the lamps in the corners of the room, washing away the darkness.
“How was it? I hope you had more success than I did,” you beckoned him over to the bed, hand joining with yours as he sat down. He was quiet for a moment, staring at the wall decorated by a wedding portrait of you and him.
“Their homes are being rebuilt and necessary resources are being supplied… but the people are angry. And they have every right to be. I just don’t know what else I can do to help them,” Jiung frowned, adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed in an attempt to fix his dry throat. You ran your thumb over his knuckles soothingly. 
“Jiung, you’re doing everything you can right now. It’s going to take time— a lot of time— and constant effort, but it will pay off in the end. The people will see how hard you worked to restore everything that was lost.”
He nodded along tiredly to your words. You always knew what he needed to hear. Having you back was what he desperately needed. He pulled you into his arms, warm body meeting your cool one. 
“I won’t give up on them. I just wish I could relax for a moment. There’s always more to do, always more problems to fix. Sometimes it feels like too much,” he whispered sadly. You hugged him tighter. 
“You can relax for a moment,” you proposed. Jiung pulled back slightly, questioning you with a look in his eyes. You cupped his cheek and smiled, adoring his every feature even when he looked exhausted. 
You brought your lips to his in a kiss that was both passionate and soothing, warm and cool. Jiung submitted to it, just as you wanted, relaxing his body completely and pulling you in closer, longing for more. His lips were soft and his skin was warm, inviting you in further. Jiung pushed you gently, one hand holding the back of your head while the other laid at your waist. You leant back until you hit the soft pillows, still kissing Jiung tenderly. He held up his weight with a supporting arm, not wanting to crush you, but still not ready to stop kissing you. His free hand fell to your hip, circling the small dip there, one of the many features he adored about you.  
When you were both teenagers navigating your newfound feeling of love for each other in the middle of a wartorn time, you would have never anticipated a future together like this. Your two nations weren’t exactly amicable with each other. Even falling into the complicated feelings of affection and care for the other defied a century-long history of fighting. 
As opposite as you two were, you also fit together like pieces of a puzzle. You had chosen to be with him despite all odds, customs, and circumstances. It was never meant to be easy, but together you built a strong team with balance and drive. Fire and water. Warmth and coolness. Passion and gentleness. Forever intertwined.
Just as Jiung’s lips melded with yours and his hands traced the lines of your body with a touch gentler than the sweetest words, so too did your hearts race in sync with the other, souls and bodies responding in consonance. 
p1harmony taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @eternalgyu,, @kangtaehyunzzz,, @amara-mars,, @nyukyusnz,, @blossominghunnie,, @wccycc,, @seunghancore,, @sobun1est,, @bananabubble,, @talkingsaxy,, @cupidslovearrows,, @50-husbands,, @hursheys,, @mjupis,, @stannwjnss,, @gong-fourz,, @forever-atiny,, @loserlvrss,, @lexeees,, @xikskrrrs,, @cupidslovearrows,, @nicholasluvbot
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goddessinnerglow ¡ 4 months ago
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Become Your Best Version Before 2025 - Day 28
How to Keep Yourself Motivated
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Hey Goddesses! Today let’s talk about staying motivated, it’s one of those things that sounds simple but can feel so tricky in practice.
Staying motivated is hard sometimes, isn’t it? You start off with this burst of energy, but somewhere along the way, that fire dims. Maybe life gets in the way, or maybe you start questioning if it’s even worth the effort. That’s okay. It happens to all of us.
But motivation isn’t some magical power reserved for “those people” who always seem to have it together. It’s a practice, one that grows stronger when you nurture it in small, intentional ways. So today, I want to walk you through what’s helped me stay motivated, even on the hard days.
First, let’s start with your “why.” Why did you start this journey in the first place? Maybe it’s to feel more fulfilled, to grow into a version of yourself that you’re proud of, or to show up for your dreams in a way you’ve been putting off. Whatever it is, hold onto that reason. Write it down if you need to. Sometimes I even put my “why” on a sticky note and slap it on my bathroom mirror. It’s a gentle reminder that keeps me grounded on days when I’d rather not try.
When motivation starts to fade, breaking things into tiny steps makes a world of difference. Let’s say you’re working on a project, and it feels overwhelming. Instead of thinking, “I need to finish this,” focus on, “I’ll work on it for 10 minutes.” That’s it, just 10 minutes. Starting small makes the task feel less daunting, and once you’re in the groove, it’s amazing how often you keep going.
I remember one day when I was procrastinating on writing. I told myself, “Just write a single paragraph.” And you know what? That one paragraph turned into a page, and then another. Sometimes, getting started is the hardest part, but once you’re in motion, it gets easier.
Another thing that’s helped me is pairing tasks with something I enjoy. When I sit down to work on something, I’ll make it a little ritual, like lighting my favorite candle or putting on a playlist that makes me feel unstoppable. The other day, I found myself dancing around my living room between tasks. It didn’t make the work any less real, but it made it feel lighter.
And let’s talk about celebrating wins. We’re so quick to criticize ourselves for what we haven’t done, but how often do we acknowledge what we have accomplished? Even the small stuff matters. Wrote a sentence? That counts. Made it through a tough day? That counts too. I’m serious, celebrate those moments. A little self-high-five or a favorite snack can go a long way in keeping you going.
Of course, there will be days when motivation feels completely out of reach. On those days, remember this: it’s okay to rest. Motivation isn’t about being “on” all the time; it’s about showing up when you can and being kind to yourself when you can’t.
Imagine this: It’s December 2025. You’re looking back on everything you’ve accomplished, all the times you chose to take a step forward, even when it was hard. That future version of you is proud. They’re looking at you right now, cheering you on.
So here’s my challenge for you: What’s one small thing you can do today to move closer to your goals? It doesn’t have to be big, it just has to be yours. If you feel like sharing, I’d love to hear about it.
See you tomorrow for Day 29! You’re doing amazing, even if it doesn’t always feel like it.
♡ ☆:.。 Keep glowing, babes! ♡ ☆:.。 With love, Goddess Inner Glow.
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