#allowing them to make decisions for everyone else definitely seems like a good way to run a country 👍

[marvelsmostwanted]

The Supreme Court really said we’re going to put you at a structural disadvantage for getting into college, but if you do get in you will need to take out loans that will also put you at a structural disadvantage when you get out of college. Happy 4th

[astrobydalia]

more observations (lost count)✨

Hello guys! Life's been crazy lately and I barely have time to make any of the master posts I wanted to, so you'll be getting lost of observation posts that I've been collecting in my drafts for the past months. As always, enjoy!

❗️long post

work by astrobydalia

✨ Sagittarius and Aquarius are so fucking similar. Both of them are chaotic af, love their freedom and think they're smarter than everyone else. People who have both of these in their big 6 have the most unhinged

✨ Libra is WAY more obsessed with perfection than Virgo

✨ Whenever I had Libra or Taurus ASC on my Solar return chart I was lazy AS FUCK. I had no motivation to work whatsoever during those years, all I wanted to do was vibe and enjoy life. I also felt very relaxed and stress-free, when difficulties came I just went with the flow

✨ What is up with Gemini risings and always feeling intellectually insecure all the time? Literally their #1 insecurity is feeling like they are dumb or like they’re not good enough for highly abstract and intellectual tasks/professions. They come across as someone immature who lacks wisdom or has a superficial/simplistic view of things. I feel like this is because they attract people who are a bit of know-it-alls (Sagittarius DSC) and they have a reputation for being scattered-brained (Pisces 10th house) so people tent to infantilize them a lot.

^^^But let me tell you this not true at all, Gemini risings are some of the most brilliant people I’ve met with so much potential. Their problem is that they allow overthinking to get the best of them and end up doubting themselves 24/7. These are the type of people who have amazing ideas but they never pursue any them. They really struggle making decisions for themselves, they always need to ask for opinions first which is not a bad thing but this makes them come across as incapable or as someone who lacks self-sufficiency

✨ Mercurial signs (Virgo and Gemini) like to focus on concrete things and immediate reality, they process life by connecting one thing at a time and taking info as it comes, they focus on what's going on around them cause Mercury is all about multiplicity and details. With Jupiter signs on the other hand (Sag and Pisces) one thing about them is they don't care about details as long as things make sense as a whole, they see life from a more broad and general perspective, they prefer having a birds eye view of things because Jupiter is all about expansion and therefore it likes to encompass many things at once. This is why Virgo and Gemini rule mundane life themes and immediate reality while Sag and Pisces are more about general life lessons and higher knowledge

✨ Scorpio moons/8th house moons are the definition of an energy vampire fr. They just have a really poor understanding of healthy emotional boundaries, they expect you to give your all but aren't willing to reciprocate and always turn everything into a manipulation or mind game somehow which makes it pretty exhausting to be around them in the long run. Don't get me wrong, most of the ones I’ve met were very and good people but they always end up taking my energy away and make me feel emotionally burnt out

✨ Mercury-Mars aspects have this "it is what it is" mentality and really dislike over complicating things by reading too deep into them. They tend to think things exactly as they seem. This does not mean they're simplistic, on the contrary this makes them surprisingly insightful fast thinkers and are not the type to be easily fooled

✨ I've seen people saying that hard aspects between Mercury-Pluto makes people misunderstand your words. This is not true, this happens with Neptune cause Neptune rules delusion, but Pluto is a very blunt and straightforward planet cause it's all about revealing the dark truths. Mercury-Pluto aspects makes someone very deliberate with their words and they know exactly what to say to make their message stick. You will understand their words exactly how they want you to understand them. What happens with hard aspects is that the native tends to have a more provocative approach in the things they say, they don't care if you're offended by what they say as long as what they say makes an impact. People can misunderstand their intentions because of this, but not their words

✨ The ironic thing about Aquarius placements is that they are very good when it comes to connecting with the masses, the public usually feels very drawn to them because they're very good at appealing to collective values which makes them come across as relatable to many people as a result. However, when you actually try to relate to them or connect one-on-one, you will find yourself with someone that is surprisingly elusive, distant and more distrustful than Scorpio placements which is a huge contrast from the welcoming vibe they give off to the public. I've found that the only way you will get close to an Aquarius placements is on THEIR terms lmao, if they've decided they like you, it'll be them who will approach you and/or make the effort to engage with you

✨ A reocurring thing I've seen with Virgo placements is that they really dislike big changes and prefer to stay in control. I think this is not mentioned often cause it's kinda weird to say that about a mutable sign, but Virgos being mercury+earth ruled they feel comfortable relying on facts, data, observations, etc and they use all this tangible info to navigate reality, that's why they rule daily life and routines because they invest a lot of their energy on factually understanding and categorizing their reality (earth signs in general are very attached to the tangible). Their mutable nature shows in that they easily use their knowledge to adapt, find solutions and fix what’s wrong but when they are in situations where these "categories" prove to be useless (aka Pisces themes), they get very triggered cause that means they no longer have control of their reality

✨ That being said another reoccurring thing I’ve noticed with Virgo placements is that they love to predict things. But not in a mystical sense it’s more like they enjoy understanding things in such way that they’re able to easily put a label on them and easily predict what’s going on or how something works

✨ I have not seen a single Taurus placement who didn’t have the most insanely sexy and pleasant voice ever. Doesn’t matter if they sing of not, just hearing their voice is so delightful

✨ Aquarius Mercury really believe their opinions are the most ultimate and correct opinions out there. They are certain that their judgment is always 100% objective (aka always true) so in their mind if you slightly disagree with them that means you’re mediocre, dumb or narrow-minded.

✨ There's always a duality in all mutable signs. Sagittarius can be very humorous and optimistic but also very dark and profound. Gemini can be curious and chaotic but also very analytical and logical. Virgo can be picky and perfectionistic but also very permissive and conformist. Pisces can be very compassionate and wise but also very detached and clueless

✨ Neptune does not do well in air houses/signs at all simply because air energy rules (different types of) information and connections, while Neptune is all delusion and confusion. Also air energy is purely cerebral and rational while Neptune appeals to the unconscious

✨ I have not fact-checked this but I feel like it's safe to say that Mars rules testosterone. Testosterone is a hormone associated to violence or impulsive behavior, sex drive, red blood cells (blood), masculinity, etc That's literally all mars

✨ People always talk about how Capricorn moons have had a rough life but I've noticed this is also very true for Sagittarius Moons?? Responsibilities are not imposed on them like Capricorn, in their case they have to build up wisdom about life through pure and raw experience without anyone giving them a heads up or any pointers first, that's why they grow up feeling like they're fully on their own. Things work out for them at the end but they always have most MESSY life experience it's really crazy

✨ Both domicile and afflicted Mars are ambitious and determined but the main difference is that Libra/Taurus/Cancer Mars need to find some type of enjoyment or fulfillment in their goals in order to get motivated while Capricorn/Aries/Scorpio Mars find motivation in the challenge and endure through stuff they don't find pleasant

✨ From what I've seen males with Scorpio placements are very superficial and will gaslight as a lifestyle. They are the type of people who look the other way or brush things off or never takes anything seriously and I've noticed they do this so they never have to take accountability.

✨ Neptune/Pisces energy either gives “glamorous and ethereal” vibes or “weird in an extremely cringe way” vibes, there’s no in-between

✨ A reoccurring thing I've noticed with those who have Chiron in Taurus/2nd house or Chiron-Venus is that they often have dubious morality or double standards because they don't have a solid values

✨ Every single Libra Moon/rising female I’ve met embodied the material girl stereotype. They really have this “instagram girl” vibes to them if that makes sense

✨ Those with Sagittarius in the 5th house can actually find a lot of joy and happiness in becoming parents or they have a lot of fun with children

✨ Scorpio Mars can't stand not knowing what's going on around them and at first I thought this was bc they were suspicious/paranoid but then I realized it’s because they’re just controlling as shit. They come across as very chill and care fee but they’re actually SUPER controlling dude. Even when they know for sure that they can trust you and you’re doing nothing wrong they still want to keep taps on you and won’t leave you alone. They won't bluntly violate your privacy but will still find ways to always know what you're up to

✨ The resentful and spiteful stereotype associated to Scorpio actually belongs to Leo placements imo. They can be very reactive and childish when you insult their ego and will make it very known that they won't let it go

✨ Cancer North Node people always have some sort of issue or inner conflict with of having kids. They feel drawn to the idea of becoming a parent but deep down they low-key don't? I've also seen many women with this placement who had fertility issues

I have the theory that these natives are conflicted in this topic because they see family as an achievement or a societal expectation (Capricorn south node) so in this life time they have to know what it's like to desire a family for the right reasons and not because they feel like they 'should'

✨ Capricorn risings really are hyper-aware of their public image and how others perceive them. That's why they always end up becoming very popular and respected, cause they know very well where they "stand" publicly so they know how to successfully curate their own reputation. It's not surprising to see this placement a lot in celebrities

✨ Pluto in the 12th house are genuinely unsure of who they can trust which leads to a lot of paranoia and projection. The type to ignore the most obvious red flags but then automatically doubt your loyalty cus you spoke in a suspicious tone

✨ Pisces/12th house placements 🤝 disappearing. Y’all shit on Gemini for ghosting but have you ever met a pisces/12th houser?

✨ Saturn in 5th house people had parents (namely father) who were overly critical of them and their self-expression. Doesn’t necessarily mean they were unsupportive of the native but they were quite hard on the native’s creativity

✨ I've seen a lot of bullies/mean girls have Aquarius placements. Honorable mentions: virgo, Leo, libra

✨ Neptune-ASC people are really good at making themselves invisible when they want and/or making parts of themselves go completely unnoticed even if they're bluntly obvious. I've noticed they actually get away with a lot cause they have this tendency to not be accurately seen by others if that makes sense

✨ Neurodivergent individuals usually have Mercury harshly aspecting (conjunction, square, opposition and inconjuction) Uranus and Saturn. Said Mercury is more often than not in a water house/sign/degree or in Aries. Of course not everyone with these aspects will be neurodivergent, but it's just a pattern I've seen

✨ Pluto-ASC people most of the times fail to have a lighthearted view towards life. They always want to look beyond the surface of things which doesn't really allow them to enjoy life as it is. They often get a reputation for looking too deep into everything and in turn the Pluto-asc native often sees others as superficial

✨ Virgo risings are huge conformist and won’t go after anything that’s outside their immediate boundaries. They only make an effort towards things that are accessible and will quickly lose interest in anything that has difficult availability or requires them to go way out of their comfort zone. They're overall pretty self-serving.

✨ I know several people diagnosed with OCD. All of them have Virgo AND 6th house placements, 22º in their big 3, Scorpio Mercury/Moon and Mercury dominance

work by astrobydalia

[herejusttosufferalong]

Pancake anon here.

Whew, where to even start! It has been a week.

At this point, I think I'm just as confused as the rest of you. However, I do have some theories. Take all of this with a massive grain of salt.

I do personally believe N's song posts are about L. I can only see a few reasons she would post these so publicly.

She genuinely just likes the songs and wanted to share

They are a message to someone who she can't communicate with readily

They are a message to the fandom

N has admitted she is chronically online. She is also incredibly smart and calculated about her decisions and what she allows the public to see. Finding songs that are so clearly about love and sex and sharing them "just because she likes them" makes no sense for N. Especially right now after all the speculation from the press tour and backlash L got after the pap walk and beyond. She knows what everyone will read into them and there has already been so much chatter around her love life for her to post songs like this willy-nilly.

If she wanted to share them to communicate with someone it would have to be with someone she can't easily call or text. Yes, she is a millennial and using songs to express your feelings is a core part of this generation. However, see my previous point. She wouldn't do this publicly unless she had a very good reason. And I personally think not having an open line of communication is one of the reasons. But I don't think that person is L. I actually think it's a message to A. More on this in a moment. 

Which brings me to the last point, that the songs could be meant for the fandom. I believe this is also one of the reasons. They were meant to share with the fandom that she is in love. Who is the fandom going to automatically think/hope they are about? Of course L. And these songs are incredibly L/N coded. So if she wanted to let us know she was in love and it wasn't about L, I truly believe she would be more deliberate in how she shared this information so it wasn't misinterpreted. She's also protective over L, and she wouldn't want to send that attention to him if it wasn't meant about him. 

Which brings us to the topic of A and the friend group. It has been eerily quiet from everyone (except T & C) since their return from Italy. T & C seem to be business as usual but everyone else disappeared. It feels a lot like pre Italy when we all thought something was going down. I still think it was. My gut feeling is things were tense with L&A between GQ & Italy but somehow got settled enough for the Italy trip. Upon returning, my guess is things soured again. Not 100% sure I can pinpoint what exactly the issue is, maybe it have to do with DM, but I don't think it really matters. The silence is deafening amidst all the very loud break up rumors and N's social presence this last week. 

Okay, so here is my delulu gut feeling for what is going on. Again, HUGE grain of salt here. I 100% recognize I could be reading everything wrong. 

The Italy trip and pictures being published was a bit of a breaking point for N. Not in a "sad girl moping over not being with L" kind of way. But in a "Fuck this, I'm not waiting. I'm going after my man" kind of way. I think something snapped and she decided she decided she was going all in to let him know she wanted to be with him and also let A (and L's other friends) know that she isn't holding back. Cue the shade of the CW birthday post, the scrabble board, possibly the shirt photo (though I'm unsure my thoughts on that at the moment), and most importantly the songs. 

The first song was such a deliberate choice. A song about a conversation on the telephone from someone you haven't heard from in a while is definitely going to trigger fans to speculate about L. And even if that wasn't her intention, we know she saw it is what everyone's reaction was. But she chose to leave the song up for the full 24 hours. Then 48 hours later, she decided to double down and post another song that has all kinds of messages about knowing someone very well and there not being any pretense. Almost as if she was confirming our suspicions, because what could be more L coded than that? 

The silence from A after all of this was shocking and very telling. N was poking the bear, and the bear was not responding. Even if N did not intend all this about L, the fandom was going crazy, and to remain silent for so long during these situations is not her norm. 

Which brings us to current events and rumors about Cyprus. Is/was L there with A? I honestly don't know and I go back and forth on it. On one hand, the rumors are based on two tweets from accounts that went private. One account is speculated to be from a Balkin country. But I do think A is either there right now or was there recently so it's very possible he was too. In truth, I honestly don't think it matters if he was because, again in my delulu gut feeling, sometime recently N has decided to make it very clear to L that she is in love with him. She decided to stop waiting for him to be passive in his relationship with A and just go for it. And I believe she's letting us and A know that this is happening. I don't think she would so confidently do that if it wasn't moving in the direction she hoped. 

I honestly wonder if, and lean towards the idea, A is in Cyprus without L because things are ending and she's getting some family support and maybe doesn't really have a place to live right now. I know some people also speculate she is there for a job and this could be needed if things are ending, but I haven't seen clear evidence of that yet. However, her post yesterday is showing me that she isn't going to go quietly and she is going to continue playing games and try to rile people up. I think we might be in for a rough few weeks if any of this delulu is correct. 

So that's my 2 cents for what it's worth. I will say, I have also had a roller coaster of emotions this week as many of you have. I go back and forth on a lot of things. But I keep bringing myself back to the last few stops on tour and how obviously in love with each other they were. The way things went in Galway with N's family and the "I will wait for you" song following that stop. And I can't get past the certainty that N is very intentional with what she shares and knowing how fans will interpret it. 

Cheers WH patrons as we approach rough waters ahead. 

💜🥃

[nikethestatue]

The First Flight

Azriel flies Elain from House of Wind to the townhouse. Another lil fic for my Elain Archeron Week. Enjoy!

“I’ll get Nes,” Cassian announced loudly and proudly. “You get Lucien,” he told Rhys. “And you can get Elain,” that was directed at Azriel.

“We’ll see if Nes will allow you to carry her,” Azriel noted dryly.

“Of course she will!” Cassian assured him with enviable confidence. “I am the biggest and the strongest and she’ll feel safest with me.”

At ‘biggest and strongest’ Azriel raised his brow. 

“Cass, don’t get upset if Nesta doesn’t want to fly with you,” Feyre warned cautiously.

They landed in the House of Wind and Azriel fell back, preferring not to deal with the drama that was about to ensue. His only objective right now was to have Elain agree to have him carry her and fly her to the townhome. If he was stuck with Lucien–again–he’d just hurl himself off the wall. He did not need to carry Lucien as well.

Things went as well as he predicted between Nesta and Cassian. She was ready to hurl herself off the wall at the suggestion of Cass flying her. She and Feyre proceeded to bicker between the two of them, with Cassian definitely not helping, and Rhysand attempting to play some kind of referee, which was the worst idea possible. 

Azriel left them to their own devices and slipped out of the room, quickly making his way to where Elain was housed. He bypassed the small library and entered the sitting room, quietly opening the door and stepping inside.

He didn’t want to spook her, so instead, he sent out a shadow, hoping that she knew that it was him in the room with her. The shadow raced towards the sombre, sad figure that sat in front of the window. She was wearing a plain, but well-tailored cream-colour dress, and her hair was tied into a loose braid on her back. The shadow slithered over Elain’s leg and then landed on her hands, wrapping itself around her fingers. She looked down and smiled softly. There was no fear and no alarm in her expression. The shadow caressed Elain’s hand, twirling around her fingers and darting back and forth. 

Azriel approached quietly and carefully, not wanting to startle her. But Elain turned her head to him and looked him up and down. He was dressed in full armour, black and gleaming, and it occurred to him that maybe this was not the best idea. He knew that he looked menacing when he was dressed like this–and the armour was designed to instil fear and trepidation. Standing here now, with this shy, traumatised girl, looming over her was probably a terrifying sight. Shit. He should’ve thought about it before he came here. 

To Azriel’s utter surprise, Elain did not shy away and only said ‘hello’.

“Hello,” he offered, trying to make his deep, hoarse voice sound as gentle and unthreatening as possible. As he would typically do with a scared animal, he lowered himself onto his hunches in front of her and smiled. “Am I disturbing you?” he asked.

She shook her head no.

“How are you feeling?”

She thought for a moment, really considering his question, and then answered ‘I am sad’.

“I understand,” he nodded.

She looked at him, her eyes clear for once, her expression thoughtful and then whispered, “You probably do”.

He wanted to tuck a loose strand of her golden brown hair behind her ear, but he didn’t permit himself to be so bold with her. 

“Here is the deal,” he told her instead. “We’d like to move you and Nesta to the townhome where Rhys and Feyre live. In the city. Would that be alright with you?”

She seemed almost surprised when he’d asked for her opinion, and he dawned on him that most decisions about her life were probably made by someone else. She wasn’t used to being consulted. 

She nodded.

“Good. So we will need to fly down there,” he explained. “Do you think you can do that for me?”

She nodded again, her huge brown eyes drinking him in. He didn’t mind it at all. Unlike almost everyone else, it seemed that Elain wasn’t scared of him whatsoever. In fact, she seemed quite comfortable in his presence, which was very unusual. He didn’t quite know what to do with this–someone like her not being frightened of him.

“You can fly with me. Or, if you are not keen on that, you can fly with Cassian or with Rhys. How does that sound?” 

“With you,” she told him immediately, without hesitation. 

He smiled at her and whispered, “that’s my good girl”.

At these words, she seemed to perk up and then slowly licked her lower lip, before biting it softly.

He’d have to keep this in mind for later. Looked like she wanted to be his good girl.

“Do you want to take anything with you?” he offered, as she got up from the chair. He wasn’t sure if he should be touching her, but it’s like his hands had a mind of their own, and he reached and put his hand on her back, supporting her.

“No. I don’t have anything. Only my ribbons,” she said flatly. He walked beside her, still holding his palm to her back, and she didn’t ask him to remove it. In her bedroom, she grabbed a handful of ribbons and then looked around, searching to put them somewhere.

He extended his hand and said, “I’ll keep them.”

She dropped them in his open palm and he stuck the bundle in his pocket.

“Are you afraid of heights?” he thought to ask her then. 

She thought about it, “I am not sure. I’ve never been anywhere very high. This place is quite high up in the air and I don’t mind it.”

Azriel sought to reassure her, saying, “if you don’t feel well at any point, let me know. We can always take breaks.”

“I trust you,” Elain said simply. 

“Alright then, come,” he beckoned her and she followed him to the balcony. There, he stooped and opened his arms, “ready?”

She nodded, “ready” and then he carefully scooped her up and held her tightly to his chest.

She was light and small, very thin, almost sickly, and it angered him. The whole thing angered him. The fact that Nesta didn’t allow anyone to see Elain in the past seven weeks, and kept her isolated, was probably not the best idea. If he were Rhys, Azriel didn’t think he would’ve listened to Nesta and would’ve done everything to help Elain. But then, he wasn’t Rhys and Elain wasn’t his. But if she were his, things would’ve been different.

He kept his touch respectful, but he felt her next to him, the shape of her body, and having touched many a female in his lifetime, he ascertained that she would be soft and plumper if she actually ate. She wasn’t shaped like her sisters, and for whatever reason, it pleased him. He wasn’t sure why, because she was mated to another. The thought made his teeth clench and he stepped off the railing and plunged down.

“Ahhh,” she sucked in a breath in fright, throwing her arms around his neck and pressing her face into his chest.

He smiled and stroked her head, as they flew at a smooth, unhurried pace. He was glad that he just snatched her and didn’t give the others a chance to carry her instead of him. This was his time. 

Cassian was rather obvious in his attraction to Nesta. He was the least subtle male in existence, so it wasn’t exactly surprising that everyone, including Nesta, were aware of Cassian’s interest. Azriel, however…he kept his interests to himself. And from the moment Elain was Made, he couldn’t stifle his interest in her. He couldn’t stop the desire that coursed through his veins. It wasn’t a lustful need, but it wasn’t brotherly or paternal either. 

“Am I heavy?” she asked after a few moments.

“No,” he laughed. “No you aren’t.”

Her finger traced the scales of his armour, around the bicep and she murmured, “you are very strong…”

“Well, I am an Illyrian warrior.”

It sounded stupid even to his own ears, but he was too distracted by how she felt in his arms, by how her hair fluttered in the wind and swept over his face. He was too distracted by how she reached for his arm and how she shifted against his chest, her soft thighs moving until he could touch the curve of her bottom. 

Mother’s tits!

He didn’t think that this would affect him quite so strongly, but here he was, hot within his leathers, filling his lungs with the jasmine and honey scent of her, counting every pale freckle on her nose and cheeks. He moved his fingers just so, brushing over her bottom, pretending like he needed to readjust her position. He did. Only he did it for his own benefit. She didn’t seem to mind though. She leaned into his embrace, pliant and soft, and watched the city below them.

“It’s beautiful,” she murmured, awed by the sights beneath his wings. “I can’t believe that I am flying! It’s…it’s incredible!”

“I am glad you are enjoying it,” he answered. While she was looking down, he carefully dragged his nose over the top of her head, scenting her. It was neutral, but two things he could immediately tell–she wasn’t scared of him and she was very subtly aroused. Very subtly. But there was a tiny shift in her scent, a slight warming of her skin, a new spark to her eyes and cheeks. Her lips weren’t as pale as before. Whatever she was feeling, she liked it. And he wondered if it was the first thing that she liked about her new life, about this new world? Was he the first, and so far, only thing that she enjoyed in her new form?

At that thought, Azriel felt a certain smugness. 

Did he actually make her happy?

She moved again, comfortable and at ease in his arms. Her small little tit pushed into his breast plate and he hated that he was wearing it, because he couldn’t feel the softness of her breasts at his chest. 

“That’s Sidra,” he began explaining, “and that’s the sea and the port. Over there,” he jerked his head to the north, “is Illyria. On a clear day, you can see Ramiel, a holy mountain.”

“That’s where you are from,” she said. It wasn’t a question. 

“It is.”

“I’d like to visit one day,” she surprised him.

“Illyria?”

“Yes. Why not? I am sure there is beauty to your land. Both you and Cassian are good men.”

He wasn’t sure about her assessment but he didn’t argue.

Slowly, he began descending, making sure that he didn’t cause her any discomfort and watching for any signs of dizziness. But she was a trooper and seemed just fine. It pleased him, for whatever reason. Elain being comfortable with flying, not being afraid of heights, enjoying herself–it mattered to him. 

He landed on the front lawn of the townhouse, and walked down the four marble steps, before pushing the door open with his foot.

He crossed the threshold with Elain still in his arms, carrying her as if she was his bride. She wasn’t. But it didn’t stop him.

Her hair had loosened from the braid, and long strands tugged on the scales of his uniform, connecting them like golden threads. She lay in his embrace like a pale golden mass and he loved it. He was still holding her, when he finally noticed Feyre, who apparently had winnowed back home. She was watching them, wide eyed, and with a stupid little smile on her lips.  

Sighing, Azriel set Elain on her feet, making sure that she was steady on her feet. 

He didn’t plan on it, but he also couldn’t bring himself to part with her. He couldn’t end this peaceful lovely interlude just like that. He simply wasn’t ready. So, he beat Feyre to whatever she was about to say, and turned to Elain, who stood there, looking a little lost.

“Would you like me to show you the garden?” he offered. 

Elain looked up at him, looking relieved, and then nodded once. 

It seemed like she wasn’t ready to part with him either. 

[sufferu]

Honestly the reaction ficlets are more of a setup for. Something else.

Reaction Fic Aftermath: The Inn

“Subaru, maybe this isn’t—”

“—and we have arrived!” Subaru enthusiastically slammed the door open. “Bonjour! Hello! The Emilia Camp is here, so let the meeting commence!”

“S-Subaru?!” Ferris shrieked, his eyes widening. He was sitting in one of the chairs holding a cup of tea, which had now spilled down his front. He didn’t seem to care. “Subaru, what— WHY ARE YOU HERE?!”

“What are you doing here?” Crusch demanded, quickly standing up. She turned to face Emilia. “What is he doing here?” she snapped. “Why did you let him come here in this state?”

“I—” Emilia stammered.

“We’re here because of Anastasia’s great deal, of course!” The merchant in question was sitting right across from the healer and his Lady, all three of whom had startled violently at his introduction — as had Wilhelm, Ricardo, and the Pearlbaton triplets, all of whom had been standing over their shoulders. Wilhelm was staring at him with a horrible look on his face. Subaru grinned at him, and felt his stomach tie itself into a knot when that look only deepened in response. “I know we got sidetracked with — uh — but you didn’t forget the whole purpose of this meeting, right? Emilia-tan needs her father figure back after all, and you said you could hook us up with a lead on a good crystal he could snuggle himself back to sleep in! We’re a little later than planned but now that we’re here, why don’t we get right—”

“You shouldn’t be here,” Ricardo interrupted, voice harsh in a way that Subaru realized he had never heard from him before. A hand clasped around his arm, gently but firmly. “We need to talk about what just happened, and you absolutely should not be here for that. Now come on, we’ve got some spare bedrooms where ya can lie down —”

“I don’t need rest!” Subaru objected loudly, shaking him off. “And we don’t need to talk about it. I can sum up the major talking points right now! It was a really weird experience, I— I’m a lot less useful than everyone thought, and let’s all hope it doesn’t happen again! There, done!”

“That is not—!”

“Why is Subaru even here?” Wilhelm demanded. Subaru flinched at the pointed lack of a ‘-dono’ suffix. It made sense that the Sword Demon had retired the nickname after the events of — of — but it still stung, much more harshly than Subaru would have anticipated. It made him want to cry. “Lady Emilia, you must have known that we would need to talk about — why did you bring him here for that?”

“I— I thought that leaving him out of it would be mean!” Emilia stammered. “Nobody likes being talked about behind their back, right?“

“He is clearly in no state to participate in any discussion right now, and especially not about this!” Crusch retorted. “Allowing him to come to this meeting was cruel, and I must insist—”

“Hey, that’s pretty rude!” Subaru broke in, voice high-pitched in an attempt to sound as cheerful as possible. “I’m right here, aren’t I? And I can make my own decisions, you know: picked out my own outfit this morning and everything—”

“Subaru, stop talking,” Ferris snapped, visibly frazzled. “This isn’t the time for jokes, just—”

“Who said I was joking? My style might not be the same as yours, but I think I’m very fashionable, thank you very—”

“Subaru?!” a new voice shrieked. Subaru spun around to see Felt in the doorway, accompanied by an equally-horrified Reinhard. Behind them, Rachins had already started to back away. “What are you— you shouldn’t be here! Isn’t that common sense?!”

Subaru flinched, but tried to play off the growing hurt. “You wound me!” he crowed, hand to chest in a theatrical pose. “But I forgive you, because clearly you are confused from the long journey and still a little jetlagged—”

“What is— Subaru, don’t sidestep this! Get out!”

“There’s really no need for— I can behave myself just fine! I know I was horrible last year but I’ll definitely do my best today, so it’ll be—”

“That’s not what I—!”

“Lady Felt is right, Subaru,” Reinhard insisted, stepping forward. “Why don’t we just—”

“I don’t need to ‘just’ anything! Why would you half-ass your work when you can give it your best—”

“Natsuki-kun.”

“—And yes, that is I! Natsuki Subaru!” Subaru spun to face the speaker, finger guns at the ready. “How can I help you, Lady Anastasia? You need some sewing advice, or — well there’s not much I can do, but I promise to try my—”

“Natsuki-kun.” Anastasia’s voice was gentle, amidst all the shouting. “Ya don’t need to do this.”

Somehow it was that gentle tone that came the closest to making Subaru burst into tears on the spot. He could feel himself starting to shake, and took a step back. “I…” He desperately fought back his tears: he couldn’t cry! Not here, not now— not after THAT, when they already thought so lowly of him— and had every reason to think— “I-I…”

“…and we could probably stand to— you’re HERE?!”

Subaru relaxed very slightly at the sight of the grape-haired asshole, who had only just walked in alongside his — his little brother, right, the one who had come to deliver the initial invitation. There, this could work. He’d just provoke him like he always does and then things would go back to normal.

“Hey, asshat, how’s the past year been?” he tossed out immediately. “Met your little brother the other day, I think I like him more than you actually—”

“Subaru, stop that,” Ricardo said immediately. “This isn’t the time, just—”

“You beat up any more peasants while I was gone? Hope you didn’t, that’s not a great look you know—”

“Will ya please just calm down a second here—!”

“I mean what— what would your pa— your parents think of you for doing something like—”

“No!” Ricardo snapped. Subaru flinched away from him violently. “Do not finish that sentence! Yer behaving very badly right now, kid— you need to leave before you say something you won’t be able to take back—!”

“Captain, that’s too harsh!”

“Yer gonna freak him out even—”

“What are you talking about?” Subaru tried to laugh off. He felt dizzy. “I’m not — it’s the rest of you who are— freaked out right now—”

“Will one of nya PLEASE take care of nyer knyight already?!” Ferris cried, turning to face the other members of the Emilia Camp, all various shades of lost and panicked. “If he won’t leave on his own, then—”

“On it— c’mon, Captain, let’s just—”

The hand on his bicep was gentle, but for a moment it felt like the world’s most dangerous vice grip had threatened to close around his arm. Subaru recoiled violently. “Don’t—!”

Garfiel flinched away, eyes wide with hurt. Subaru felt a stab of guilt and immediately tried to laugh it off. “Wait— Garf, you just startled me, that’s it! It’s not— It’s not like I thought —”

“Will one of nyew who DIDN’T try to kill him— Oh crap I think that’s pretty much all of nya isn’t it—”

“That’s half the people in this room Od damn it—”

“It’s not like it ever really— you weren’t even supposed to KNOW about this, so can’t we just—” Subaru wanted to cry. He really, really wanted to cry. “It wasn’t that big a deal and it never happened! So just drop it already so we can go back to—”

“Subaru that is a VILE suggestion—!”

“Why do any of you even care?!” Subaru didn’t even know what he was saying anymore. He was talking too fast. His blood was roaring in his ears. He was going to pass out. “You didn’t— didn’t care before, so why is it suddenly—” A flash of anger suddenly cleared his panicked mind, like a bolt of lightning through a stormcloud. “All of you are just faking this!”

Ferris stared at him, mouth agape. “WHAT?!”

“Yeah, okay, I get it! You don’t actually give a shit! This is a ploy to get us to— to step out of the election, or give up something important, or—”

“Subaru, sto—!” Emilia’s voice barely reached his ears.

“Well it’s not gonna work! I already know that sort of trick and I’m calling your bluff now, so you’ll just have to find a way to fight us fair and—”

“Natsuki Subaru, that is ENOUGH!”

Subaru squeaked, finally falling silent. The rest of the room fell quiet as well. Julius rarely got angry enough to raise his voice like that, but when he did, people listened.

A look of guilt briefly flashed through the man’s eyes before hardening into — something else. A large hand wrapped around his wrist and pulled, hard, with Subaru finding himself forced to stumble along as his senior knight pulled him further into the inn.

“I am removing my junior from this situation,” he told Anastasia, bowing briefly and slightly as he moved past her. “Please feel free to start without us.”

“Thank you, Julius,” Anastasia said. He saw Crusch mutter something to Ferris, who bowed wordlessly before starting after them, but Subaru was pulled out of the room entirely before the knight could catch up.

“Now,” he heard Anastasia say as they rounded the corner, out of sight. Her voice suddenly sounded much colder. “I think we need ta have a bit of a talk…”

[brujitaadinbo]

This image does not belong to me… it is from Sopita Pog and you can follow it on Instagram.

If there is something that as humans identifies us as such; It is the fact that thanks to our emotions and feelings we can recognize our own humanity. A person in constant growth must know that this is elementary. This and the fact that being sociable beings and living in a community (it's not my thing, look for related information and you'll have to agree with me) we have that tendency and need to live in groups, live with others, relate technically.

All this forms that inevitable process; growing up And although this is palpable, it has been part of many stories, part of the narrative from reading, cinema, series, etc… I explain this so that you understand my point. If we live it, it is nothing out of the ordinary, it is not wrong, nor is it bad, that growth is experienced by the characters that we like so much. A growth that allows them to improve or worsen. In the case of Din, Grogu and Bo, it's a blessing that this growth goes straight to something positive.

It irritates me that they want to deny that possibility to these characters and continue pigeonholing them into "I'm the tough one, the tough one, the one who's never going to get better and that's fine."

It is definitely throwing away the entire process experienced in the seasons or the content. It is not understanding that "being someone powerful" does not only consist of an important position, having a lot of money, causing fear in others, etc etc… the true intention of having power, of being powerful, of feeling fulfilled is to be happy, to live a change, having friends or a partner or family, not always ending up alone, having others who contribute to you, and that you know that empowers you, enriches you, not only materially.

Well, it is appreciated that Din and Grogu are together because that was always the purpose, denying Grogu or wanting to throw him away is ruining the series, it is wanting to spoil Din and his new path. Now to say that Bo Katan, they only want to pigeonhole her into being Din's girlfriend or just being Grogu's mom… it seems ridiculous to me and a pathetic and meaningless argument.

If you know Bo's story, everything she has experienced and that she has always been surrounded by war, you will understand her point when she said it in "Clone Wars" "I would like to be good at something else, not just fighting."

I said it before, I say it now and I will continue to say it; If by her own decision she wanted to continue as Mandalore, retire, be alone, or be with Din, her right is and she has it and has earned it. Taking care of Grogu, being his friend and betting on the role of mother does not make her weaker or less important; on the contrary, the desired motherhood is a blessing, a right that many people like to minimize. A very important act of love and responsibility, a high position that not everyone fulfills and the fact that she decides and applies it does not make her any less and it is very wrong that people take it that way, interpret it that way and want to impose it. as such. Mothers have an important role in our lives, in our environment, obviously in this content, if you don't believe me, just go check out this great character from Hera Syndulla. I applaud the fact that this line of growth is visible.

I applaud you for bringing Din and Bo closer and making the possibility of them being together, walking and continuing to grow together visible and palpable. Because growing is an internal process but there is always the option of not experiencing this process alone. And with Grogu by the hand, what better

[askauradonprep]

got any founding of Auradon and the rescuing of Lampwick, Alexander and the other stupid little boys hc?

no one EVER talks about the founding of Auradon!

Ohhhhhh this has opened a flood gate. This might go long.

Okay, so, initially the realms merging was slow? A couple places connected like Hercules and Aladdin's. Bits and pieces from different worlds and timeframes. It was not a big all at once thing until towards the end. That was a matter of fate and was not caused by any one individual. This DID however help with things like communication barriers and adjusting to differing circumstances.

There was something odd going on though. Several people who, by varying belief systems, should have ended up in other afterlives that were ending up in the Greek underworld. This WAS caused by an individual - the Evil Fairy Godfather. He thought that getting certain villain together would make things more 'fun'. Maleficent didn't disappoint. She, using her own creativity for magic and some 'visit the land of the living' assists from Hades, convinced a group of villains to form an alliance (temporarily! Villains don't share well, she knows that) to take their revenge on those who had defeated them. Hades thought this was HOT AS HELL by the way.

The heroes, however, teamed up to stop them because....yes? Duh? They were gonna do that? And unlike villains and their giant egos and selfish, cruel natures, they actually are pretty good at teamwork. So the alliance was defeated and in order to establish some...well, order, in the chaos of a merge, different kings/queens/heads of state ran for a sort of 'high king' position to make final executive decisions for this new giant landmass. Adam won, because he had some strong ideas for leading Auradon into a golden age.

So. First they had to deal with the villains. Now, Adam wasn't totally happy with how things went with Gaston. Yes, he was happy things worked out and he and Belle had their happy ending, but it stuck with him that Gaston wormed out of facing any kind of justice because he died. He tried to put it out of his mind because, well, he was DEAD, he couldn't hurt anyone anymore. The alliance blew that out of the water. Suddenly they weren't safe even WITH their villains dead. They'd proven that they could and WOULD keep coming back to haunt them. So he decided the safest thing to do would be to put them on an Isle. It would be surrounded by a barrier, breakable only by the most powerful magical objects. No evil magic would be able to work there and they wouldn't be allowed any technology at the level of wi-fi or more advanced than that. That way, they could just...live their lives and be each other's problem instead of everyone else's.

I truly feel that the sheer and utter awfulness of the Isle was born more out of apathy than any strong intent to make the Isle as miserable as possible - at least on Adam's part. I mean, he's angry with them for sure and he maaaaay have learned that sometimes being harsh gets the job done for convincing people to try to be better (worked for him), but I don't think either is what he's thinking of. I think he just didn't care. Supplying the Isle with items that don't sell in Auradon just seemed like a practical way to get rid of stuff that people didn't want. And frankly, Adam doesn't care enough about the villains to make sure that the Bureau is conducting proper inspections to make sure that the stuff they send isn't spoiled or broken to the point of being unusable. The kids are a mix of the same apathy, a sort of 'they surely wouldn't be so awful to their own flesh and blood kids, right?' and just generally not wanting to keep dealing with these people who've tried to ruin his life twice now because just thinking about them makes him angry and contrary to popular belief he does not ENJOY losing his temper (even though it's definitely still there sometimes). Is that an excuse? Of course not. Adam SHOULD have cared. He SHOULD have made sure the Isle wasn't being turned into a dump. He SHOULD have made sure the Bureau cared. He SHOULD have been making sure the Isle's conditions were humane. He SHOULD have taken these kids away because WE DON'T LET KIDS GROW UP IN JAILS. That's not so much an excuse for Adam as it is a clarifying of motives.

Back to the founding though - so uh. There were a LOT of trials. Some of the ones about more controversial people on the Isle are below. Adam was not the judge in all of these. There were other judges who oversaw different cases. The judge who did the majority of the convictions for abuse of anthropomorphized animals was noted as being PARTICULARLY strict. - Aunt Sarah: Aunt Sarah was never actually convicted of anything. She's LEGALLY speaking free to go and can leave the Isle whenever she wants. She CHOSE to go to the Isle to take care of her cats, who WERE to be sent to the Isle because they were part of the villains alliance (which isn't surprising because they love destroying things and causing general mayhem). - Anastasia: Got suckered into helping with Lady Tremaine's part in all this (plus Drizella). So she got convicted with them. She is INCREDIBLY bitter about it and Cinderella wasn't happy about this. - Iago: Iago...never really stopped stealing stuff. He was doing a lot of that during the chaos of the battle and so well. Yeah. Aladdin ain't happy either. - The Ringmaster: According to some of the comics and games (which Descendants has used for material before) he IS significantly more abusive to his animals than in the movie. Which makes it easier to understand why he is on the Isle. - Amos Slade: Amos Slade's trial is mostly noteworthy for establishing an early precedent in crimes against anthropomorphized animals (which Auradon now knows is a thing). He tried to appeal his sentence on the grounds that he couldn't possibly have known Tod was anthropomorphized at the time he committed his crimes. The judge applied a new variant of something called the thin skull rule - basically if you are legally at fault for something, you can't avoid the penalty because the harm done was unexpectedly and unforeseeably severe. In this case, the judge ruled that while Amos couldn't have known Tod was anthropomorphized, he DID know he had NO business being illegally on that nature preserve and he most CERTAINLY knew he was not to hunt there. Therefore, he had to 'take his victim as they came' and the fact Tod happened to be anthropomorphized meant he was still guilty. And therefore still to be sent to the Isle of the Lost. - Hades: Zeus had Hades (and other greek gods and monsters involved in this alliance like the fates, Hecate, Circe, the Titans) tried in god court. This was the second time that they had tried to destroy Olympus and Hades particularly had done so to try to take the world for himself. So he sentenced them to be given a partial dose of the potion Hades gave Hercules to make them more mortal. Their magic could now be affected by the barrier, and they were a lot more vulnerable. Hades was HUMILIATED and was known to vacillate between 'I am a god, you can't do this to me' and 'I used to be a god, leave me alone'. Zeus had them stored in the Isle for safekeeping. As long as the mortals don't mess with them, he doesn't really care who the High King for mortal politics is.

The resurrected villains have no memory of dying, though they remember the battle.

The idea of the Isle of the Lost was controversial in some circles (Aladdin has never liked it, the Court of Miracles have never trusted it), while others had varying levels of trust in the idea (as presented. I don't think any would approve of how it turned out).

Since you brought up the Coachman - yeah, there was a LOT of testimony in bringing him in. Pinocchio, Jiminy Cricket, and the Blue Fairy (who'd been keeping an eye on him) all testified. So did Honest John and Gideon, because they were afraid of the GRIZZLY death that awaited anyone involved in Pleasure Island. Adam reduced their sentence from death to being placed on the Isle of the Lost - BEFORE the Coachman. Therefore, he wouldn't be able to retaliate without his magic.

The Coachman himself was totally unrepentant. He stood there grinning that horrible grin when Adam was going over his crimes. He wasn't at all afraid of the Isle or the possibility of death. And he flat out refused to help Adam find any of the kids. Adam just about lost his mind. He managed to deep breathe though and then told the Coachman, very firmly, that if he didn't help find the kids within a year or if god forbid one had died, then he would have Fairy Godmother turn him into a donkey. And then he'd be sold to one of the places he sold the kids to, where he would be worked to death. And then he'd be brought back and sold to the next place, and over and over again. And finally, when he'd worked on every place he'd sold a kid to, he'd be sent to the Isle of the Lost to live the rest of his life there as a donkey. While getting angrier, louder and more bestial the longer he went on. Wiped the grin right off the Coachman's face. He agreed to find the kids.

The boys being rescued was done in a variety of places. A LOT of owners were HORRIFIED - they had no clue what they'd bought. Adam sent busses and ordered they be promptly returned home to their parents, who were notified of the good news. Adam had the Coachman accompanied by a hero at all times (often someone like Hercules who could literally turn him into a smear in an instant) and he went to a handful of places personally to make sure the kids were turned back. He also sent the Blue Fairy or Fairy Godmother to ensure there was no funny business in him turning the boys back. Although I think the Coachman knew he was in deep at that point and knew better than to play games.

The boys stopped a couple places on their way back. One of them was the encanto, where the Madrigals let them stay a couple days while they resupplied and planned the rest of the trip (because like hell were the Madrigals gonna look at these little boys who've gone through a nightmare and kicked them out). Mostly though, I think they were glad to go home. Their parents basically threw a big block party when they got home. There were lots of happy tears.

Blue Fairy PERSONALLY dropped off the Coachman on the Isle. Which was...dangerous since she didn't bring her wand (she didn't want it stolen) but she insisted.

After everything that happened with the battle, it was clear that, while magic is a very powerful resource, it also has serious issues. It can be abused against people who have no real way to fight back. So Adam has 1) STRICTLY forbidden the use of evil magic. 2) While good or neutral magic isn't illegal, his government officially encourages people to try other means to solve their problems, like knowledge. 3) Use of magic by members of the council (like Fairy Godmother) must be APPROVED by the Council, for that reason. Hence why FG needs council permission to use her wand, even though nobody else seems all that troubled by the magic ban.

Most of the rest of the first year was focused on building infrastructure, opening Auradon Prep, and establishing the new government. As for the sidekicks? While Adam didn't force people to pay them, he has also created infrastructure that means there's large swathes of time they're not working, among other things. I guess he thought that'd balance out. It does not. "Not working" is not the same as PTO, benefits or wages. But well.

Overall? It was a pretty good start to a reign that DID create a golden age, but it also planted the seeds for rotten fruit, namely the Isle and the sidekicks issue. It added up to a complicated legacy where he did do genuinely impressive things - but also awful and flat out monstrous things.

I know that was more about the founding than the Coachman and co. but I tried to include that story here!

[thatthoughtatthebackofyourmind]

In Defence of Albus Dumbledore:

Look. I know this is an unpopular opinion, so I’m going to write this here because putting it anywhere else (like at the bottom of the fics which have inspired this frustration) would seem mean, and it would probably end up coming off as unintentional flaming, which I would never do to anyone ever. Also, as I’m less frustrated with individual works than I am with an entire situation, it wouldn’t really be fair to direct it at one specific person.

Get ready. This is going to be very ranty and long and I can't promise not to get off topic and onto a tangent a few times.

I understand that we all have grown up a lot since first reading Harry Potter. I get that once we realized how grey a few of Dumbledore’s decisions actually and the ways in which they affected the characters we love we all felt rightfully upset.

But can we please stop being so narrowminded about it?

There are plenty of redemption fics out there. A lot of them are works that redeem characters like Severus Snape, Draco Malfoy, Draco’s parents, various Dursleys and loads of other people. I’ve seen fics that have Sirius confronting the realities of his juvenal behaviours and having to atone for past wrongs. I’ve even seen (but admittedly never read) fics that redeem Voldemort himself.

But the least popular person for a redemption story in fanfiction by far seems to be Albus Dumbledore.

I get it.

He was supposed to be an infallible genius who did no wrong and he let us down. But please.

Can we all please just admit that we’re using Dumbledore as a stand in?

The hatred we as a fan community levy at Dumbledore is influenced by so much more than his actions in cannon.

It’s the dissolution we feel at growing up. The need as young people to bite back at overbearing authority. It’s the conviction that leaders should never be allowed to fail if failure means the death of innocent people. Even though we can all recognize on a personal level that our failures are typically unintentional and are definitely what make us human.

Of late, it’s very clear that Dumbledore is a stand in for the betrayal we feel at JK Rowling’s anti-trans standing.

We all loved her so much.

She gave us this world.

She promised it to everyone.

And then she said that it was all a lie, and that it was never meant for some of us anyway.

The parallels are clear.

While we were first reading, we loved who Harry loved. Simply because he loved them, and we loved him.

When we grew up, we started acknowledging the ways in which the characters mirrored people in real life, and we chose the people we found the most familiar to love instead. Personally, I understand the reason I read Severitus so often is because I had a largely absent father who I idolized as a child, and that father was a bit of a rockstar like person. Dark, intelligent, and cruel when he wanted to be. Artistic, genius, condescending, and amazing.

As an adult, I still long for his love and approval. Learning that Severus was capable of so much good at the very end of his story, that he was in fact good all along, even when he looked exactly the opposite, gave me hope that my father was too. Even though I now understand that redemption for my father is just a fairy tale it’s still a story I hold close to my heart. A story I long for. It’s a possible happy ending for both a lonely child and a jaded grouchy adult.

Albus Dumbledore was different.

This was a man that we trusted to have everyone’s best intentions at heart. We were told he was safe. We were told he was the smartest man in any room. And then he failed us. And we looked back at all he had done, and rather than seeing the good he had tried to achieve, all we could see were the mistakes he had made.  

I firmly believe that the reason that so many people hate him so strongly now is because we all loved him so much first. Like Harry, we all believe that he was incapable of mistakes. His mistakes in cannon aren’t any more morally condemning than anyone else on the light side.

Keep in mind that I said, “in cannon.” I feel like I need to distinguish that. In cannon, though Harry asked if he could stay at Hogwarts during the summer, he never told Dumbledore about living in a cupboard under the stairs. His letter was addressed to there, but we have no way of knowing whether it was physically or magically written on the envelope. And besides, that letter was signed by Professor McGonagall, not Dumbledore. Harry also never mentioned to him the Dursleys withholding food. Or locking up his trunk so that he couldn’t do his homework. He made it clear that they disliked him, that they thought him a burden, but think. Really think. Dumbledore is the head of a school full of children. How many children misunderstand and exaggerate even in their own minds how much their families dislike them.

Let me be clear; when I say kids exaggerate I don’t mean in terms of abuse. I only mean typical things such as, “My mom’s always grouchy when she gets home from work and she never notices that I’ve tried really hard by cleaning the bathroom if she told me to clean the kitchen before she got home and I decided to do the bathroom because I wanted to clean it instead of doing the dishes and now she’s yelling at me that she just needs me to help her sometimes, and I don’t feel like that’s fair because really I do. Look, I cleaned the whole bathroom by myself! And I straitened up the living room too! The only thing I ‘forgot’ was the kitchen and now she’s acting like I do nothing. This means she hates me and appreciates nothing I do. I am clearly a burden to her, and I should go live under a rock so that she doesn’t have to deal with me anymore.” Really, your mom probably isn’t saying you’re a burden. Your mom is more than likely overworked, over-tired, and almost certainly depressed in a society that doesn’t cater to mental health awareness, and on top of all that she was raised by a generation that was allergic to admitting and self-regulating their true feelings so she can’t articulate that and she’s instead taking her frustrations out on you.

This is wrong, and she shouldn’t do it. But consider. Why didn’t you want to clean the kitchen? Was it because you had a long hard day at school and you’re overworked, over-tired, and definitely depressed in a world that doesn’t cater to mental health awareness, and all you really wanted was a break from the hardest job and you just wanted to compromise by doing the ones you felt emotionally and physically able to do? Because I promise, that’s probably exactly how your mom feels about the damn dirty dishes that she’s going to have to deal with before she can make dinner after being cussed out and yelled at by customers and or bosses all day in between doing her actual work and that’s the real reason she’s yelling.

Because, though a lot of teens believe otherwise, parents are still just people and the feelings that overwhelm kids still overwhelm adults just as badly. And they’re even less likely to know how to help themselves because they didn’t grow up with the internet where everyone shares their feeling and gets back validation and advice, so they mostly just believed those feelings were personal failings that indicated something broken specifically only in them and that they should learn to live with it and never tell anyone ever because complaining is for babies and liberals. Okay, maybe that last bit is a little too specific to my own mother, but you get the idea.

It’s a cycle that’s been going on for years. Hopefully, we can eventually all learn how to communicate peacefully and compromise on chores sometimes so we can end it someday. Or everyone can just switch to paper plates, and then we’ll worry about how we’re killing the planet later and no one will have to do the dishes ever again.

The point is, while that isn’t the best parenting style, and it can cause issue’s with your familial relationship as you age, it isn’t technically abuse. And it especially wouldn’t be considered abuse in the 90’s while Harry Potter was taking place or the early 00’s when it was being published.

Harry was not bruised when he arrived at Hogwarts. He didn’t show obvious outward signs of abuse. He never told any adults what his life was like at the Dursleys at all. He really didn’t even say much about it to Ron or Hermione either. Mrs. Weasley sent him treats for his birthday, which was a sweet motherly gesture. Hermione and Hagrid did as well but think about it. Do you believe for a second that if Molly have-another-serving, can-I-get-you-some-more-bread, try-the-potatoes Weasley honestly thought the Dursley’s were starving Harry that she would first wait until the end of July to send Harry anything, and then only send him sweets? She would scale the Dursleys’ house and stuff a full six course meal through the bars multiple times a day before she let that boy live off stale birthday cake. When she asked if the Dursley had fed him enough she meant it in the same way she always meant it, in the if ‘I can feed the world I can love the world’ way.

 Hagrid sent him rock cakes, but again, think about it. Hagrid had shown up with a cake for Harry’s birthday the day he first delivered the letter when he couldn’t have yet known of the way Harry was treated. He just wanted to show Harry he was loved and missed.

Of the people who sent him food, only Hermione really knew Harry didn’t get to eat his fill at the Dursley’s and she still only sent cake because all she knew was that he was being forced to diet with Dudley. Which is why she sent him the kind of food one would eat if they weren’t on a diet instead of true sustenance. A fourth of a grapefruit as a meal is not a diet, no matter what Petunia called it. And if he had told Hermione specifics, she likely would have told Harry that, but again, he didn’t tell anyone specifics.

 Everyone knew that Harry was unfavoured by the Dursley’s and that they wouldn’t be celebrating his birthday, and he wouldn’t receive cake or presents, but they really didn’t know much else. Ron and Hermione only understood he was being starved in the way most naive well-fed kids from happy families can understand. It sounded cruel, and they did try to tell people, but because they didn’t understand the full gravity of the situation, they couldn’t properly communicate to trusted adults that Harry was actually experiencing abuse. Plus, Harry tended to downplay it even to them.

When Dumbledore speaks about knowing Harry would come from a less than happy home, you can tell he is picturing a world where Harry is liked second best to his cousin. Where he never feels fully at home. Like an overextended visitor in a relative’s house. He thinks they’ll treat him like the weird cousin who came to stay and never left rather than an immediate family member.

He isn’t picturing Petunia Dursley slinging a frying pan at Harry’s head. Or refusing to let him drink his fill of water on a hot summer’s day spent weeding her ridiculous flower garden. Or an overly restrictive diet enforced on an already undernourished body simply to make Harry’s morbidly obese cousin feel better about his doctor changing his eating habits.

I think we’ll all agree that feeling less than welcome by stuck up relatives sucks, but it’s better than whatever Voldemort’s loyal leftover followers will do to him if they manage to track down the person responsible for their dark lord’s downfall.

I understand why a lot of people feel like Dumbledore should have just put Harry under the Fidelius Charm and hid him rather than sending him to the Dursley’s but consider: If Dumbledore trusted Sirius the way he must have done to not betray James and his family, then it makes sense that he felt Fidelius was no longer an option. He fully believed Sirius was the secret keeper. Sirius, the Potters, and Pettigrew were the only ones to know of the change. It’s likely that after learning that the Death Eaters had convinced Sirius to betray the Potters he was jaded enough to take it as a sign that no one could be a trusted Secret Keeper. No matter how much they loved the person under protection.

He also likely would have insisted on a trial for Sirius had Sirius himself not told everyone that he was the one who killed James and Lily while descending into hysterical laughter. We know what Sirius meant, (he felt responsible for them dying because switching to Peter at the last minute had been his idea) because we read the third Harry Potter book, but Dumbledore didn’t have that same advantage. All he had was the word of an apparently mad man. A man who had just tracked down another dear friend and apparently killed him and 12 innocent bystanders in a fit of insanity.

Why, when last he had heard Sirius was the Secret Keeper, would he doubt a verbal confession from a man who did nothing to try and save himself from Azkaban? The Marauders never told anyone of their animagus abilities. No one but Sirius could have understood what Peter had done. Why do we expect Dumbledore to have known better?

So, instead of Fidelius and hiding Harry away for his entire childhood, he gave him the best protection he could think of under the circumstances he had been given. He sought to give Harry a normal life and to keep him safe from the remaining Death Eaters.

Dumbledore understood that fame was power, and that power could corrupt even the best of people with the strongest of minds, so he kept Harry away from the limelight. He also understood how fickle people where about fame. This was the right decision even if the Dursley were a bad choice in guardians. We saw proof of this numerous times while Harry was at school. His fame only ever seemed to bring him more hardships. In book two they said Harry was a dark wizard because he was a Parselmouth and that that’s how he overpowered Voldemort. In book four even some of Harry’s friends refused to believe he wasn’t just a glory hound and that it hadn’t been him who entered his name in the tournament, but rather someone trying to kill him. In book five, almost everyone refused to believe Harry was telling the truth about Voldemort’s return. Every single time Harry’s name entered the limelight, it was in a way that harmed him. Imagine how much earlier it would have started had he grown up in the wizarding world. They would have been debating his kindergarten finger paintings if they could have.  

Why does the entire fandom also assume that Dumbledore thought of himself as the wisest most all-knowing man in any room? The only people who canonically acted like they believed that about him were the Golden Trio, and they were enlightened otherwise multiple times throughout the books as they grew up. Just as everyone learns new truths about trusted adults they thought of as perfect as they grow.

The fact is, Albus Dumbledore has always been just a man.

He was a great and powerful but flawed man who wanted more than anything to make sure that evil could not prevail. He obviously still holds plenty of shame and guilt over his dealings with Gellert Grindelwald in his misspent youth. We have surmised that when he looked in the Mirror of Erised he likely saw his sister Ariana, or something as equally heart-breaking which he recognized as his own fault. He fully understood that he was just a man. He encouraged everyone to understand that fact about Voldemort as well.

He was not a god, and he didn’t pretend to be.

Not in cannon anyway.

Fanon Dumbledore, on the other hand, tends to be anything from a meddling idiot to a full on manipulative dark lord complete with moustache twirling and nefarious intent. Which, I believe, further influences and enforces the fandom’s collective bad opinion of him. Most of us haven’t reread the real books in years. It gets hard to remember at some points what was something he did in canon vs. what was something he did in fanfiction.

 Every other character seems welcomed to grow in the world of fandom.

Severus was canonically a willing Death Eater in his youth, a bully to children in his care in his adulthood, and a petty grudge-holder who couldn’t let go of the past. We accept that we can’t fully know how much of his behaviour towards the students was an act to fool the Death Eater’s children, but we can assume it definitely wasn’t all of it. Still, he gets plenty of redemption fics. He had literal access to Harry’s traumatic childhood memories but still saw no signs of abuse because he was too busy trying to keep a 15-year-old child from gaining any ammunition about his own past.

Looking back, it seems obvious that as very few of Harry’s childhood memories were shown in the Occlumency scenes, he likely wasn’t as bad at clearing his mind as either he or Snape assumed, but it was also possible that Severus didn’t see those memories because that wasn’t what he was looking for. The memory of Harry getting chased up a tree by Marge’s dog as the rest of his family watched and laughed should have triggered at least a couple of red flags, but Severus was typically determined to only see the bad in Harry, so he overlooked it.

James Potter who is often thought of as the better choice for Lily was also a bully. And he spent years relentlessly pursuing a relationship with someone who had never given him any indication that his advances were welcome and had in fact outright told him the exact opposite of that many times until he finally wore her down and convinced her to give him a shot. That’s gross, unacceptable behaviour but I guess it is technically better than dating a budding racist that sees you as the exception to his views on your people, so James is rebranded as a lovable hero who changed after having a slightly misspent youth rather than a mean spirited bully who likely grew bored with his main target once he no longer saw him as competition (there would have been no reason to bully Snape if Lily wasn’t friends with him anymore after 5th year which was conveniently around the time he began to “grow up”) as well as a pushy loser who wouldn’t take no for an answer even though Lily said it multiple times. (There’s also the point that once Snape knew about Lupin being a werewolf, James likely wouldn’t have bullied him anymore so as not to provoke Snape to reveal the secret and get Lupin thrown out of school and possibly killed.)

Ron told Molly outright that the Dursley’s were starving Harry and had fixed bars on his windows to trap him after weeks of being concerned when he didn’t reply to Ron’s letters, and she still ignored it, assuming instead that Ron was exaggerating and never even tried to check with Harry to learn that he wasn’t.

Remus spent a year teaching Harry individualized lessons to repel Dementors and never once asked him why he was so sad that they affected him in ways that none of the other students experienced. I mean really, he couldn’t have been the only orphan attending that school so Remus couldn’t have thought it was just that. And Neville’s backstory was nearly just as sad (and just as well known to Remus) and even he didn’t faint like Harry. Yet, he didn’t question Harry once.

Sirius (who is also a bully and a petty grudge-holder) never wondered why a child would want to move in with an escaped prisoner who he had never met before that had just mangled his best friend’s leg and tried to commit murder in front of him instead of the relatives he had been with his entire life. Even when until that very night he had believed that prisoner wanted to kill him?

Arthur actually met the Dursley’s and saw Vernon’s rage at magic when he came to collect Harry for the Quidditch World Cup and he still questioned nothing.

Half the Order found Harry locked inside his bedroom with locks affixed to the outside of the door, and all they did was give vague unfulfilled threats to Vernon and send Harry back. You could blame that on Dumbledore, but I think that’s ridiculous. They were not under Imperious. They made their own decisions. Every adult there had a responsibility to that child, and they all failed him individually.

Yet time and time again I see Dumbledore condemned so overwhelmingly in the very fics that redeem and or absolve these other characters of those very actions.

Even McGonagall, who knew from the start that the Dursleys were awful people, never pulled Harry aside as his head of house and asked him anything about his home life. And, as I stated earlier, her name was the one on the letter addressed to the cupboard under the stairs. She also made it very clear that she wasn’t someone for Harry to confide in by constantly dismissing any concerns he presented her. The way she reacted about the Stone was ridiculous. And her non-concern over the amount of detentions Harry received from Umbridge followed by the ‘have a biscuit’ scene rubbed me the wrong way. And yet, of late she seems to be revered in the fandom community as some kind of badass grandmotherly character. All because she protested one time about leaving Harry with the Dursleys and then never brought it up again.

It’s getting a bit ridiculous. I’m exhausted by the way the fan community continues to rewrite cannon to fit their dissatisfaction with our once trusted role-model JK Rowling through Harry Potter’s once trusted mentor Albus Dumbledore.

Just once I would like to read a Harry Potter fic without having to think about the various ways in which JK Rowling let us all down. And with everyone rewriting Dumbledore as the ‘real villain all along’ I can’t help but be taken out of the fic and forced to relate it to reality.

[imaginespazzi]

Nivi, I want to start off by saying that you’re one of my favorite authors, and that I loved In Between Shades of Blue so much! I really didn’t think anything could top it, but you’ve out done yourself once again. I am in love with Golden Hour! Monday night is quickly becoming one of my favorite parts of the week. I just read GH with a big smile on my face 😀, until the angst gets angsting and then my face is usually 🫨. I also want to say that reading the reviews after a new chapter is one of my favorite things. It very much gives we are all part of a book club, but not just any book club, a book club with the author. And I just love those interactions so much. I’ve been wanting to join a book club for a while and this very much is scratching that itch so thank you 😊.

Now onto the review:

I loved the flashback of when they were on Team USA. Fetus Pazzi always makes me smile because how are two people so lucky to have found their person at 15? They make me sick in all the best ways. Did they ever discuss their crushes like maybe a celebrity crush? Azzi didn’t seem shocked that Paige’s date was with a girl. I just wondered if maybe they had previously discussed who they found attractive. Oh and the picnic scene was giving me In Between Shades of Blue. I love that in both universes their first date was a picnic. Paige is such a sap I love it. Soft Paige is my favorite.

Azzi makes me want to both hug and shake her. Girlie Pop is so in her head all the time. Whenever her guilt of having said no pops up, I just want to wrap her up in a warm blanket and hand her a cup of tea. I know we’ll find out the reason later, but I can’t help but feel like it was something as simple as she wasn’t ready at the time Paige had asked, and Paige took it as a never and they both made choices off of that misconception that fractured them both. I know Azzi felt she had a good reason when she said no, so I hate that she is constantly beating herself up about it and simultaneously making decisions based on that fear.

It’s cute that Azzi keeps sending her parents to look after Paige. First with the wedding and then the morning after fortgate. It just shows how much she really cares for Paige even when she wouldn’t allow herself to be the one to do it . Makes me wonder how many times during their breakup Azzi was still looking out for Paige, unbeknownst to blondie. There is something just so sweet and pure in the bond they have with each other. They really are best friends first. Also, just as an aside, I really love how you capture their relationship through their banter. It really does feel like stuff they would say to each other, and it’s definitely one of my favorite aspects of their dynamic.

When Stephie says “I better be” to Tim saying she’ll always be his favorite, it just reminded me of the Lebron live when Azzi threatened with “better not” to someone wanting to take Paige out for breakfast. I dunno if I’m reaching on that one, but it was something that jumped in my head when I read it.

Love love all the interactions and family dynamics with the Fudds. Everyone really is scared of Princess 😭. Not only do you capture the bond between Paige and Azzi that feels true, you’re so good at writing for everyone else’s personality as well. It really does just feel like a full fleshed out universe.

Paige asking Azzi “You won’t - you won’t run away again tomorrow morning will you?” Poor Paige is traumatized 😭. But also Azzi answering “I won’t run away again” feels more like a declaration to herself. Like maybe she is finally willing to allow herself to be happy. But also feels like we might end up getting a switch up between the two where Paige is pulling away and Azzi is hanging on. I really can’t wait to see where you take us next, even if I feel like it’s about to get real angsty soon. Please have mercy on us 😭 🙏🏻

Ok, I feel like this has gotten long enough. I can’t wait to read and review chapter 7!

Can I be 📚 anon?

Awwww babes welcome to the book club and of course you can be 📚 anon. I really like that y'all love reading the reviews as much as I do because genuinely I love hearing y'alls thoughts and it actually really helps me flesh things out sometimes. ALSO I love you for calling the UCLA fic by it's actual name lmao.

I think they probably had a conversation about sexualities before for sure so that's why Azzi's not phased but tbh I just didn't want to write Paige with a man lol and idk. Also I love picnics and idk Pazzi just feel so picnic dates coded? Idk how to explain it but they just seem like the kind of people who would love to sit outside and just talk for hours.

OMG! That was not on purpose but I love that you made that connection. Stephie's just such a mini-Azzi, well she's a mini-Pazzi lol.

AH THIS MEANS SO MUCH! I'm always a little worried that I'm maybe not characterizing everyone else right. I like to think I've gotten Paige and Azzi down okay but I've never really written the Fudds like that so I'm glad it seems to true to their irl personalities!

Paige has been put through it so she's just a little scared, my lil cutie baby! I like that everyone seems to think this is a bait and switch and Paige is gonna run this time. I guess we'll find out tee hee <3

[thisisyourprincipalspeaking]

So here’s my earlier thoughts and while rereading I see why I get mad, read the below and despite making some points, overall, I sound like a nutcase. This is what he’s done to this fandom. It’s to the point you seem batshit crazy for staying obvious facts but then come off an unhinged based on trying to make sense of things. I really tried to give him grace, but fuck this shit.

“Ugh no matter how many ways I look at this, Chris is a damn good actor if this isn’t a pr stunt. Meaning he had me thinking he was much smarter than this. 😞 I just don’t know. I know I should not care or whatever but I really thought he had a good head on his shoulders despite being in the Hollywood world and it’s just disappointing to think this is who he really is. Like he was eye fucking reporters while supposedly “dating” the girl he planned on marrying. He literally eye fucked women while standing next to her in line and ya know what, nah this isn’t real and Chris better have a damn great explanation of this mess once it’s exposed. 😂 I’m tired of racking my brain. No more being gaslit. All in all I will say I hope he initially thought things would be different or else he wouldn’t have done this and since things obviously went wrong, I hope he learns from this and grows and matures into the man everyone expected him to presently be.

I’m going to stay positive and hope this was the part of his journey, the big mistake that leads him to the road of better and never making the same mistakes twice. 😌 what can I say, I still care and it’s too much obvious bs that’s happened to make me hate him because believe me when I say, if he was down with this despite the wedding bs, things would be much more believable. Even the chicken pecks he gives her screams “I have to make this believable but I don’t want to kiss her”. It’s like they seemed cool and on the same side of things until this went public but then the Valentine’s Day montage which any pics of them was probably taken pre November 2022 and then seeing how messy this became…….but nope if he didn’t like it nor her, why marry her and permanently associate himself to her, ugh see it goes either way, then I get pissed and just go fuck it, his ass married her, screw him. I just don’t t get it. If it’s legit why act like you are in pain to publicly be seen with her, yet why claim to be private yet continue to push this mess. I could go back and forth but I guess until this ends, he’ll be an idiot and then when this ends he’ll still be an idiot but then I can at least be like fine it’s over, now let’s see how he moves going forward and when he ends up in another relationship people will see the difference. Ugh I hate him for making people feel crazy. Either own your shitty decisions or end this shit. 🙄

If I’m wrong and sound crazy, so be it, but I definitely believe this is PR!”

See……yeah……., I’m over this shitshow. He married her, he can keep her.

*cries over the wasted time loss being concerned for this man*

nonnie, i think your thoughts and comments reflect a lot of the ce fandom. and you are valid in your thoughts and feelings.

i would advise against getting too emotionally involved with celebs, instead find a passion in your life... art, music, teaching, volunteering, etc. because celebs are humans. humans we don't know. there's a very good chance they will disappoint us.

no matter if someone thinks this is pr, or real with pr or real and he's not who they thought he was, each person is fully capable of deciding for themselves if they want to continue to support him and that's great! you like his acting? great! you like his characters? good for you! you like his interviews and like his personality? cool! each fan should be allowed to decide for themselves who they support.

[sororalice]

On The Blessedness Of Love

A homily for this difficult moment.

Dearly Beloved,

It all comes down to choice.

There are moments in time where there are decision points. Moments where one is defined by a choice as the sort of person who makes that sort of choice. We can’t escape it. It’s part of the human condition. We exist in time as beings with will, the sort of creatures who can make choices. Those choices transform us, as we are not only the sort of person who makes that choice, but also someone who has to live with that choice. We reach out and change the world, and then we have to live in the new world our changes created.

Unfortunately, often a lot of other people have to live in that world, too.

Recently, the majority of the USA chose to elect the unequivocally, unashamedly, and cartoonishly evil Donald Trump as president for the second time. This is deeply saddening and frightening, as he has made clear that he plans on using the power of the presidency to persecute people he perceives as enemies and undesirables, which seems to be pretty much everyone except cisgender heterosexual white Christian men. The Republicans also took the Senate and they have a majority on the Supreme Court, which means they now control all three branches of the US government.

Things don’t look good, dear siblings. People are going to suffer. Good people. People who don’t deserve it. And what is almost as bad is the simple fact that the bad guys won. It is deeply disheartening and frightening to me that this not only happens at all, but that it keeps happening. While I, like most pagans, don’t actually have to worry about the theological “Problem Of Evil” because I simply do not believe there is a single supreme, omnipotent, and morally perfect personal deity ruling everything, it is still extremely difficult to cope with staring into the blankly grinning face of evil while still maintaining my normal spiritual and ethical values.

I swore to abide always in love, living out the formulae of Aphrodite in my life as Her priestess. I take that oath deadly seriously. I swear it again and again, every night, in my prayers to my goddess. I also swore, long ago to a teacher now dead, to seek and serve the good. I study ethics and theology/thealogy specifically because I want to live out these values every day. It is the most important thing in my life. Which means I am pretty clearly required, just as much as any Christian, to love my enemies. I don’t have to like them, and I definitely don’t need to maintain some sort of pacifistic stance towards them, but I do have to love them. That’s the job.

Now, I have no qualms about fighting…I am also a devotee of Ares, and even Aphrodite was known as “Aphrodite Areia” (Aphrodite the Warlike”) in one of Her aspects. I am called to love, not pacifism, and I am definitely not called to allow myself or anyone else to be victimized. But the fact remains, I must relate to the Divine, others, and myself in terms of love. That is my calling, my duty, and my privilege.

I am sure you see where this is going.

I have to be able to love Donald Trump and his minions. I have to actually, truly want the best for them. I have to truly wish for them to thrive and grow as the spiritual beings, the stars in the company of stars, that I know them to be. Even while I fight them with everything I have, with every trick and stratagem my grandfather—who also fought to protect those he loved many years ago—taught me, I must love these people. These flawed human beings. These stars among stars. I must abide always in love. Again, that’s the job. That’s the mission, as my grandfather would have said. That’s what I signed up for.

I am not counseling some sort of capitulation or any sort of embracing of the ideals or actions of our enemies. I know that we must be willing to fight for ourselves and each other and that sometimes fighting gets nasty. That’s just the way it is. But I want to remind myself in every moment—and by proxy remind you, dear siblings—that those people who are doing these things, these people who for the moment are our enemies—are people. They have beliefs and desires, families, dreams, and pasts. They have hearts. They hurt, as I hurt. They are scared, as I am scared. They are angry, as I am angry. They are people, as I am a person. And so even as I must fight to stop them from causing harm, I must also love them.

There is no such thing as an absolute enemy. The people who are our enemies now may become our allies tomorrow, next week, or next year. The people who are our most valued allies today may become our fiercest enemies in a decade. Nothing is permanent. Change is an absolute. As my poems say again and again, time is a monster, and that monster is here to eat us all up. In the face of that monster, all I can do is try my best to live by my values moment to moment as change inevitably comes. All I can do is try to fulfill my mission. All I can do is love the world with all my heart while knowing that, again and again, my heart is going to get broken.

I know this is a lot to ask of you, dear siblings. I know that it hurts to be vulnerable like this. Gods, I know. It’s terrifying. And again, I am not saying that anyone should allow themselves or anyone else to be harmed in any way. If you or someone else is in danger, do whatever it takes to secure safety, up to and including the use of violence or magickal warfare. If you find yourself in a situation where you know you can’t win or that the cost of combat will be too high, run away and live to fight another day. Take care of yourselves and each other.

But when it comes time to make choices, to decide what must be done to secure a lasting peace, please, I am begging you all to remember that these people who are your enemies in this moment are also just people. Flawed people who have bad values and who are doing bad things, yes, absolutely, but people nonetheless. Creations of the Divine. Stars in the company of stars.

I am sure many of you will be disappointed in this homily. It is not in my normal style, nor am I going to ask you, as I normally do, to embrace the virtue that I have chosen for my topic, despite the fact that I believe that love is the mother of all possible virtue and the fact that love is my own spiritual calling. Love is just too important for that. It is too precious. It is too terrifying. I can’t ask it of any of you. It is a terrible thing to have to go to war wearing your heart on your sleeve and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. I’m not going to ask you to love. I’m not going to ask you to lead with your vulnerability in this aching world. I can hardly bear to ask it of myself. I am just going to tell you what I am going to do. You have to choose whether or not you will join me.

By the grace of the Divine, I am going to love.

Be well, my siblings. And be safe.

In love,

Soror Alice

Art: Peter Paul Reubens, “The Triumph Of Divine Love”, (1625)

[o-uncle-newt]

Cabin Pressure Advent, Day 1: Abu Dhabi

With thanks to @madenthusiasms for bringing the idea of doing a big Cabin Pressure advent relisten to my attention... I'm doing a big Cabin Pressure advent relisten!

No idea if I'll be doing one of these for all of them, but I listened to Abu Dhabi in its entirety (I sometimes just skip around for the "why do airplanes fly" bits) for the first time in a VERY long time, and I had enough thoughts that I did want to share them-

One of my first thoughts: it is still (or rather already!) very funny, but the rhythms are, as Stanley Meadows might say, slightly off- I can't quite decide if it’s JF still getting used to the rhythms of the show or the actors getting used to the rhythms of his writing, and it isn't exactly obtrusive or anything, but it doesn't quite feel there yet, though it does feel very very very close.

The characters don't feel quite lived in yet (which makes sense, they aren't!), and though JF is very good at doing the setup gradually, it definitely feels a bit more obtrusive than it does in later episodes, for obvious reasons. To me, I was surprised to realize that the main character who felt exactly right from the get go is Carolyn- Stephanie Cole got the rhythms straightaway and her dynamic with everyone else is instantly understood.

The other characters... I don't really know. Now that I reflect a few hours later, I'm not sure exactly what it is, but I think the nastiness:niceness quotient might not have been fully balanced yet. Carolyn was fine (with one slight exception I'll mention below) because we KNOW she's kind of nasty and she stays that way, unrepentantly, longer than the rest of them- Martin and Douglas yoyo back and forth between being bitter/petty and relatively collegial in a way that is funny but isn't AS funny as their more "love to hate each other" dynamic ends up being later, and doesn't feel as natural (Douglas saving Martin's bacon with the match-lighting was a wonderful plotting moment but from their acrimony the rest of the episode you'd think he'd be happy to let Martin drown). Arthur I think felt basically like authentic Arthur, just a bit undercooked.

On a related note, this is the only episode (as far as I can remember- maybe I’ll realize that there is another one on relisten) that shows Carolyn and Arthur at home together- which I think it was a wise move to get rid of. Carolyn's nastiness at work is funny, and while sometimes it applies to Arthur it's usually less than she'd direct toward Martin and Douglas, and the whole four-of-them dynamic helps temper it. It's a bit less funny when it's just the two of them at home- she's not AWFUL but I definitely had a moment or two where I was like "poor Arthur" which, really, should not be happening on this show lol.

Some other early installment weirdness:

Martin and Douglas seem equally good at Brians of Britain, with Arthur being the only dunce. Is this the last time that Martin is any good at a game on the show?!

Benedict Cumberbatch sounds positively funereal doing those credits... I did a double take to make sure it was him.

This is a broader one, but JF pointed this out in a Farewell Bear Fact- that the conflict is really between the characters rather than the characters against something external. You can tell from the pacing- the story arc in the episode is really the power struggle between Martin and Douglas, with the actual events (the diversion, the cat, etc) more being the grist for that mill. I like the approach of the later series better- "how do these people deal with this thing" rather than "what is a plot that allows us to see this one core character thing"- if only because it generally leads to better story pacing, but this is fun too. (I do have to say, I love how the episode is about the power struggle between Martin and Douglas, with Carolyn proving herself the alpha dog, but at the end of the day it's Arthur, the only person who doesn't care, who makes the final decision about the cat.)

On a different note- I'm wondering if there was a conscious parallel between Arthur volunteering to take the front seat in the car and both Martin and Douglas turning him down and, in Zurich Part 2, Arthur volunteering to sit in the back of the truck and being turned down by the two of them (plus Teresa)? Seems like a stretch, but still, it happened twice in a 27 episode show, so maybe it's something.

Anyway, let's see if I remember/want to continue this tomorrow, when Boston is on the agenda- an episode I probably haven't listened to in even longer than it's been since I listened to Abu Dhabi! (I'm... not the biggest fan of Boston or Cremona, but after that it'll be smooth sailing for a while.)

Abu Dhabi was a great episode to revisit- definitely in the lower 50% of my ranking, but more because there are so many even greater episodes coming later. I should add it to my rotation a bit more frequently.

[fuck-customers]

Ever since I started working in an ER I’ve had a lot more things to submit here, and today shall be no exception because I have Some Things To Say

1. You do not need to be taking a patient you’re visiting outside for “fresh air” (or anything else) in the middle of the fucking night. It is 11pm, this patient is in a wheelchair, and maybe the nurses on the floor don’t have a problem with this because it doesn’t trouble them at all, but it does trouble me. When you take this patient from their room on the floor, through the ER, to our outdoor roundabout just because there are some benches there, I then have to walk you all the way back to the floor once you decide to come in. And I know I’ve complained about something similar with this before, but this is happening to me tonight and I’m just annoyed. The main admissions in the front is open from 8am-8pm. You literally have all day to come visit with the patients, and we have courtyards up front that are closer to the floor and are specifically designed to allow for patients and visitors to enjoy time together outside. We have nice tables and benches and plants, and it’s fenced in and protected. So there is absolutely no reason you need to come and do this nonsense late at night. Plus it’s winter, it’s fucking 25 degrees outside! Why are you taking a patient recovering from any illness/procedure/whatever outside in the cold? I know the rooms can get stuffy, but like open the damn window instead.

2. Please stop calling ambulances if you’re just going to refuse them. It takes an ambulance out of use, along with the EMS workers in that ambulance, and takes it away from someone who may actually need it. I understand if you’re having weird symptoms of sickness or pain and you’re scared and want reassurance, especially when healthcare isn’t the best for everyone, but it puts considerable strain on the ambulance system to have you call them over just to send them away again. And at my hospital we have scanners that allow us to hear calls for police or fire or EMS, so when an ambulance call goes out we all have to get prepared to jump into action because we are assuming that ambulance is coming in. So it puts everyone on edge to hear someone call for EMS and then just refuse them. And yes I know ambulance rides are expensive and not all insurance covers them, and that people who don’t have insurance would have to pay for them out of pocket, but then don’t call for them in the first place! As we always say, if you feel your symptoms are severe enough to seek help, then you should always just seek help and come into the ER, whether you come by ambulance or private vehicle or what have you. So if you do call for an ambulance please make sure you are going to actually make use of the ambulance.

3. Along the same lines of the ambulance situation, here is just some helpful info for people who want to be good samaritans: If you see that someone is in need of help, first assess whether or not they are conscious/cognizant. If they are conscious and alert, please first ask them if they would like to have an ambulance called for them; some people don’t want to deal with an ambulance, even if they are seriously hurt, and that’s their right to make that decision. If they are unconscious but otherwise seem fine, then use your best judgement. Take into account the context of the situation. Did you find them lying in the middle of the road, or were they on some grass in a park? Do you see blood, or are any of their body parts in obvious distress (such as a broken bone)? Are you able to rouse them by speaking loudly? Remember that it could just be someone sleeping, and maybe they don’t have anywhere else to rest. However, if they are unconscious and not breathing, or you see blood and/or broken bones, then you should call for help right away. That’s definitely an emergency situation, and we will thank you for being a kind person and getting a stranger safe assistance. But just be aware of the situation so you’re not calling EMS unnecessarily. Y’all have no idea the amount of times we’ve had someone call an ambulance for a stranger just for the person to then refuse the ambulance; even the best of intentions can be a strain on others.

4. This one is an obvious PSA, but please don’t drive drunk (or high, or any form of intoxicated/impaired). Earlier today there was an accident where someone got extremely drunk and drove down the highway and crashed into a family of 9, causing their vehicle to roll over. Thankfully the entire family was fine aside from some scrapes and bruises, but there were very young children in that car, and I’m sure all of them were terrified during the accident. Alcohol isn’t worth possibly taking someone else’s life, or your own. Alcohol isn’t worth hurting someone else, or yourself. Alcohol isn’t worth going to jail for. Please don’t drive drunk! Stay safe and make good choices!

I think that’s all I’ve got for the moment. Sorry this is so long, I’ve had a frustrating day

[stromuprisahat]

How would you have concluded Shadow and Bone? What would be ideal ending to you?

I'd scratch all the shit from second season. Truly, there's nothing really worth salvaging.

I wouldn't interfere with the Crows. Hurrying up their plotlines and engrafting them into TGT was a huge mistake. TBH Ravkan cameos sucked even in the books. "Everyone meets everyone" trope's rarely well-handled.

I wouldn't erase Grisha genocide and Ravkan wars, I wouldn't blame them on the Darkling, I'd make the heroes attempt to solve those realistically. Hard decisions, moral dilemmas and dead ends included.

I'd skip idiotic speeches. I know US-American probably love those (judging from their stories), but that shit's pathetic. And a nice speech isn't really likely to open the masses' eyes and turn them into accepting philanthropists.

Alina would grow into a critical, active figure caring for more than Mal (plus like two more people ~sometimes~). Actually caring, not making a speech to three point half Grisha about... whatever was that "My beloved Second Army..." shit supposed to be. Oh, and she becomes less self-centred and more compassionate. Ironically, the pig-headed teen from books had more empathy than her allegedly more mature show!counterpart.

I'd never erase Aleksander's pragmatic, more ruthless streak, and while I cannot see a good ending for him in books, in show he feels much younger, more hopeful... less dead inside?! So even though I wouldn't make him into the brain-dead simp the second season did, he and less short-sighted Alina might work something out in the end.

Oh, and Nikolai would be introduced as the lonely, clever boy with need to prove himself. Anyone else sees Darknikolina possibility?

TGT ends because Alina's robbed of her nature, I think it should end with her fully embracing it, duties and responsibilities included. You cannot control other people's faith, but I'd want her to reject her alleged Sainthood, since Ravkan religion likes to use it to keep dehumanizing Grisha. I don't mind her becoming Queen- for more self-aware character it might be a good way to be able to influence people without that Sainthood she'd give up in my scenario.

I'd like to see her destroy the Fold hand in hand with the Darkling. She might have the power, but she doesn't know shit about merzost, and wouldn't it be a beautiful parallel? The first time they enter it, she believes him The Evil and he's forced to make her use her powers in order to expand it, the second time they both go willingly, and she trusts him enough to allow him to use her power, taking down the thing bit by bit.

Since we're keeping it, we'd need to address the wars and Grisha oppression. The ending doesn't need to mean something definitive- life doesn't work in absolutes-, but Ravka's lack of resources considered, they're in no position to end anything, unless they give up... or conjure something their enemies cannot trump. Excluding merzost, threefold amplified Sun Summoner under more experienced Shadow Summoner's guidance could make a unit small enough to infiltrate enemy territory and target strategically chosen places. With invisibility on their side, they might go unnoticed except for the traces of their activity. They're at that stage of history, when nations are starting to pull out nukes, and Ravka happens to own two fully conscious ones. With Grisha it's much harder. There might be laws, treaties and agreements, but those are just words, and words are wind. What deed might change one person's mind, can only reinforce another's prejudice. This is a nightmare to solve, but education, laws and black magic seems like the only way to go.

So that's the end I got to today. These three forcing Fjerda and Shu Han to lay down their weapons and agree to treat their Grisha in humane way, OR...

[khaleesiofalicante]

I just hope Lance is like David and pretends to be mad while clinging to Theia or not letting her go and getting possessive (healthy) over her instead of being like Max and completely shut her out and do dump shit because he's jelous. I really need Blackbane to be okay🌼

Also, my sincerest apology to Arthur, that kid is the only one with common sense and he's stuck with Blackbane and Kincaid's stupid decisions, my precious sunshine boy🥺

But also, I want to hug Kincaid so bad, my poor baby wants nothing but cuddle with his Arthur, but he feels like he has no one to protect him and help him, can't even begin to imagine how awful that must be🥺

While we're at it, I want to hug Theia and Lance too because they just love each other and want to be together but Lance can't seem to accept that Theia may actually like him and he grasps at every chance his brain provides him with to believe she's not actually interested and who can blame him after everything the shadow world has put him and his family through and Theia just wants to be with Lance but the world makes it so difficult and Lance's pain and insecurities also make it difficult

In summary, they all deserve the warmest and most loving hug🤗🤗

PS: I also want to hug Max so bad, every time we see his POV all I can feel is loneliness and helplessness, how did the one person who had so many people to talk to ended up having no one, god I wish he stopped pushing people away because I know they didn't stop loving him. And I feel like he is hiding his feelings from David in a way that isolates him from his husband as well, the one person he has allowed himself to have and David hasn't noticed because he has Other Max but also he has so many things to deal with, his world and everything he thought he knew keeps crumbling around him and he has no control over it and he is in no place to see past Max's defences. So I want to hug David too, so so much. I never thought Mavid could hurt me so much while they're together because they would always have each other. And maybe they do in some way but not in all ways. I mean, Max has to deal with so many things that hurt him, David isn't supposed to be one of them. And David is supposed to lean on Max so much and he doesn't because he has someone else. And both are in a lot of pain and I don't think they'll be able to see it and help each other until someone points it out or something really really bad happens. Everyone deserves a hug and a break🤗🌼 (I don't know where that rant came from either)

Lance is definitely like David in that regard. He isn’t mad at her and he can’t help but cling to her (we get it, bro). But he is like Max in the sense that he isn’t very good at regulating his emotions sigh 🙄

Blackbane is truly just suffering because of everyone around them and I need to kidnap them and keep them in the seelie realm 😤😤😤

Arthur is babiest. Fight me 😇

And Kincaid. I’ve been getting a lot of inspiration for his character and storyline and it’s been so much fun figuring him out as I write the story. I hope he’ll get a happy ending in LBAF - unlike in IALS 🥺

And Max. Oh Max. What do I do with you, buddy? Just bear with the lbaf mavid angst. I’ll make up for it with the rwrb au 💚

Blackbane and Arcaid girlies are about to go through a rollercoaster of emotions.

And yes everyone deserves a big hug 🥹🥹🥹

This is me @ all of them (also this is literally Arthur wtf)

[ekebolou]

Okay, so I'm re-reading the IwtV book because highschool me hasn't had a good run around the cerebellum in a while I guess, and I wanted to justify my love of some of the adaptation choices being made in the show. I'm happy to report that love is bounteously justified, but I have finally run across the first major thing to give me pause.

So, look, I hate Louis (affectionate). He's fascinating as a narrator in part because I think he's a remarkably shit person and yet he's definitely got the bead on something the other characters lack (and it's not just maudlin whining, though he's got that in spades enough for everyone else to be Pollyanna if they wanted. I forgot entirely that he says, for example, "Because all aesthetic decisions are moral, really." - I mean, like, now I have the capacity the really think this out and I'm not going to because god who has time, but really, he says that)

I've been worried, however, because the show seems to... like him too much. It's too easy in the presentation to forget the mistakes he makes and the way he existed through exploitation and abuse because he is also exploited and abused. (Book Louis just, like... doesn't even clock his own hypocrisy, so if you just do a ridealong with his narrative you don't clock it either, and it would be a worse book if he did clock it because if he clocked it, it would be yet another of his sins and the subject of yet endless yapping and like it's not all about you (even though it is, actually, it is all about him since he's the titular Vampire being Interviewed so like... yeah it's all about him, he's allowed to frame it that way)). They're woobifying Armand, who has the same double trap card to play in that, yeah, that's a woobie right there (arguable, I think, but I would think that), but I have the feeling they're also setting him up to take a fall, become a Bad Man.

And basically I'm writing this because I wanted evidence of my own thoughts before watching the newest episode that there's two ways this could go, and one of them will be a mistake. If they make Armand the Bad One, and poor Louis the manipulated one, then they have fallen for the bullshit trap Louis lays for everyone. I'm worried they'll go this way, and make Louis overtly sympathetic, which I think is a mistake.

The reason I'm worried is that they've taken away one of the bigger and more obvious moments of hypocrisy and self-indulgent evil Louis commits in the book, which I had honestly forgotten the exact mechanisms of until I got the right point in re-reading. Which is that Louis kills Claudia. Louis is responsible for Claudia. Lestat does the turning but the whole weight of the event should sit squarely on Louis' shoulders because Lestat is a feral raccoon with attachment issues. Louis always finds a way to blame everyone else for all of his greatest sins and then complains of the burden of conscience he carries for continuing to live with his own choices, so that even the people he sins against become minor players in their own tragedies because of Louis' big feels (and the structure of the book - like, there's very much a structure of the book factor doing a lot of work here).

So they've hidden or ameliorated the worst of his sins in life and removed all of his sins (except killing people, naturally) in death, but they've also very, very strenuously set up layer upon layer of unreliable narrations, so it's anyone's ballgame at this point. I feel like they're learning into poor sad, sympathetic Louis, but it's providing excellent dramatic tension because I also think they've done such a good job adapting things that it's entirely possible I'm wrong. So yeah, this is my one problem, but I'm thrilled at the possibility that it isn't a problem at all, which is a really fucking nice position to be in.

And I just wanted to write it down before I watched the rest so I would have proof for myself of what I thought before the season actually ends.