#all-star batman and robin

[the-great-kraken]

i'm never getting over the fact that frank miller, who wrote batman: year one, also wrote all-star batman and robin - the series with such highlights as batman ramming the batmobile into a car containing his girlfriend and alfred for no discernable reason, punching dick in the face for daring to grieve his parents who died approximately ten minutes ago, and has dialogue that looks like it was written by a particularly edgy 14 year old.

AND THIS IS JUST THE FIRST FEW ISSUES

[batfambrainrotbeloved]

highlights of reading All-Star Batman and Robin, the boy wonder. This batman is so bad he’s been nicknamed Crazy Steve out of the belief that this is a random crazy guy who stole the batsuit. He also has his own villains wiki. Im saying this to you cause youre the only other person i know who actually reads the comics

What did they do to the flying graysons uniform.

DID BRUCE JUST KIDNAP DICK

”the goddamn Batman” shut the fuck up brucie

BRUCE WHY DID YOU LEAVE THE 12 YEAR OLD YOU KIDNAPPED IN THE BATCAVE

BRUCE COME BACK HE’S BEEN THERE FOR DAYS

Alfred thank you for bringing him clothes and food since he still HAD HIS PARENTS BLOOD ON HIM WHAT THE FUCK BRUCE

BRUCE STOP GETTING MAD THAT ALFRED FED DICK AND GAVE HIM CLOTBES

BRUCE OMFG STOP TELLING THE KID TO JUST “EAT THE RATS”

why is black canary irish

okay so diana hates men, bruce is abusive, clark and bruce hate each other, and the Justice league doesnt exist

HOLY SHIT DICK IS STILL IN THE BATCAVE

BRUCE LET THE KID GO UPSTAIRS BEFORE HE ATTACKS YOU WITH HIS BATTLE-AXE HE’S ALREADY LOSING HIS SANITY

babs is batgirl before dick is robin, that totally makes sense

actually bruce making dick paint his whole body, bruce’s whole body, and a whole safehouse yellow in preparation for a green lantern coming is hilarious

BRUCE WHAT THE FUCK YOU THREATENED TO KILL HIM AND BEAT DICK UP BECAUSE HE ALMOST BROKE A RULE YOU DIDNT TELL HIM EXISTED

its been at least a week and dick *finally* knows bruce’s identity, maybe now he’ll be let upstairs

i get why this only has 10 comics

TLDR: the art is lovely, the writing is terrible

Oh bless your heart- theres a reason its the series that comes up literally every single time people complain about shit writing/horrific mischaracterization.

I will say the Green Lantern "Paint the entire city yellow." is just about the only saving grace because that level of commitment AND audacity rings very true of more golden/silver age comics (which I adore)

[jalapainio]

Quick! You have to choose one! Would you rather read Frank Miller's "I'm the goddamn Batman" All-Star Batman and Robin run, or Chip Zdarsky's "let's kill Jason and bring him back with no consequences" Batman run?

[vertigoartgore]

2007's All-Star Batman and Robin, the Boy Wonder Vol.1 #5 cover by penciller Jim Lee, inker Scott Williams and colorist Alex Sinclair.

[dc-polls]

They Would Not Fucking Say That! Round One - #6

Batman Kills Police with a Car

From: That one Frank Miller comic, All-Star Batman and Robin Context: This is the comic where Robin ate rats and lived in a cave. So it’s just all round bad.

Ran over police officers with a car

Read the reblogs and full description HERE

VS

Mad Hatter Acts Like a Pedo

From: Arkham Asylum: A Serious House on Serious Earth Context: Like most Batman Villains, he was introduced as a criminal with a gimmick (Alice in Wonderland and hats with mind-control devices, in his case). After Arkham Hospital/Asylum for the Criminally Insane was created in the comics, his character became one of the patients, sometimes specifying he has schizophrenia.

"Ah, yes. The apparent disorder of the universe is simply a higher order, an implicate order beyond our comprehension. That's why children... interest me. They're all mad you see, but in each of them is an implicate adult. Order out of chaos. Or is it the other way around? To know them is to know myself. Little girls especially. Little blonde girls. Little shameless bitches!"

Read the reblogs and full description HERE

Which incident was more out of character?

[horsechestnut]

Well, I just read War Games followed immediately by All-Star Batman and Robin. How's your week going?

[songue85]

Look... hate to be the guy, but I'm just going to write down, sorry.

Funny that you used THAT pannel, from the GD Batman, from ASBAR, because, from all sources of Batman you could pick for a reference, THAT is not a Batman defending his son's naming choices.

Like. At all.

In the disaster of a story called "all-star batman and robin", the 'Grown Up' was the one who came up with the name, and Dick Grayson, age twelve, was the one who found the name stupid ('queer', actually), and the 'GROWN UP' comes back with the smartest of replies, worthy of the world's greatest detective and one of the most brilliant minds of the DC Universe...

Then, full context of the image used:

Crazy Steve/Batman-In-Name-Only/Hobo-Batman just had sex with Not!Black Canary amidst the bodies of several men he had just burned alive, without taking their suits off because it was better that way.

No. Seriously.

After being mocked by a kid and getting pissy about it, Batman is talking post coitum to Irish-Ninja Black Canary and she just WONDERS about the name, and THEN Crazy Steve/Batman-In-Name-Only/Hobo-Batman has that reaction.

Just to show, taking things out of context, even trash can sound poetic.

i just love the fact that bruce let his 12-year-old son name his car “the batmobile” and he’s been fighting for his fucking life ever since

[girlcheater]

I'm very fond of the fact that in the earlier renditions of the league, it's Superman not Batman who has to be convinced to join.

Batman's alpha dudebro loner characterisation has become increasingly more common since then, even in fandom spaces where it's a common trope that he's lies to the league or that he refuses to join for a long time, and Superman's character has been flattened into sunshine naive boy so clearly Clark has to puppy dog eyes Bruce into joining the league... Whereas it's Batman who's constantly working with people and teaming and Superman who will literally die alone before asking his friends for help..

[litta-jpg]

the little prince

[ruhrohherewego]

I enjoy the idea of a younger Bruce (about early twenties) adopting Dick because I think it makes Bruce’s immaturity as a father figure more endearing. If anything, father doesn’t come into the picture until much later—it’s more of a brotherly configuration, at first.

Bruce takes Dick in because he sees the parallels of their situation and wants Dick to have a different future than him, but he doesn’t understand kids. So he lets Dick do whatever he wants; eat ice-cream at 3am, skip school, play whatever video games he wants, in the way your older sibling will sit you in front of the TV while they talk to friends or something.

He indulges Dick’s whims because he thinks that’s what kids should be able to do. He’s working off an immature, naive framework.

But then Dick becomes Robin, and things get real, fast. And Bruce realizes he has to take more responsibility for Dick. There needs to be limits and boundaries.

And Dick doesn’t understand the shift because he viewed Bruce as this older brother/mentor figure who was permissive and let him have the freedom to do what he wants. Now he can’t, and it feels like an invasion of boundaries instead of what it is; developing healthy ones.

So they fight. And bicker. And Dick probably throws in a few “I hate you”s that wound Bruce more than he ever thought possible. But slowly, they mature. Bruce prioritizes Dick’s well-being while still giving him what a kid needs and Dick realizes how much Bruce really cares.

And slowly, they grow to be father and son.

[ghost-bxrd]

Jason “my dad actually has a lot of siblings so I have some cousins I didn’t know about in star city I’m gonna meet :D”

Every single batfam member:

[puppetmaster13u]

Can't stop thinking about This prompt/au lol

I almost like to think that Clockwork kind of half-sent Danny to the ghost-world version of Gotham because he was struggling and is honestly just a kid and could use some guidance. And with how the Observants dislike him to the point of murder, CW sure couldn't keep him in Long Now. But Gotham? Now there's a place that not many go, thanks to curses running amok, a very dangerous City Spirit, and amalgamations of fallen Guardians and Rogues. It's chaotic, dangerous, and a hell of a shot, but the Bat could, and most probably would assist the newborn guardian. The living world and the infinite are intertwined after all, influenced by whatever realm it drifts closest to.

Thankfully Danny seems to be enjoying himself- he has a proper ghost friend now! And he's starting to be able to understand Batblob's cacophony of Silent-EverSilent-Gurgles-DistantWhispers-QuietScreamsSilence easier too without Robin translating. (His Ghost-Speak is getting so good :D) He wishes he could bring Sam & Tucker but it's a little too far into the ghost zone. And the ghosts and Vlad doesn't bother him here! (The last time he tried, unknown to Danny, the older halfa was met with a malicious swarm of teeth and maws ready to rip and tear and not lose another child again-) He's even gotten shown the exits to the living-world's Gotham. Robin likes to ramble about the new and different living-robins and about their friend who was also a robin and who disappeared one day and whose core they carry on their belt. Maybe he can help them find out what happened to him...

[dc-polls]

They Would Not Fucking Say That! Round One - #3

Batman Makes Robin Eat Rats

From: Frank Miller’s All-Star Batman and Robin Context: He kidnapped Dick Grayson and planned to leave him in the cave to fend for himself, saying “your food will present itself” with the metaphorical camera cutting to bats and rats.

Forcing Dick Grayson to eat rats

Read the reblogs and full description HERE

VS

Mikhail Arkadin Shows Loyalty to Russia

From: Doomsday Clock (2017), DC Comics Rebirth Context: The US gov is being accused of creating metahumans and starting an international metahuman arms race

“Russia’s most loyal and powerful metahuman”

Read the reblogs and full description HERE

Which incident was more out of character?

[redjayson02]

Context matters

Do BatLantern shippers know what this image is from?

This is from "All Star Batman & Robin the Boy Wonder" written by Frank Miller and after this scene, Hal is humiliated and then nearly killed by a barely trained and brainwashed Robin!Dick. Batman has to save him but it is not "cute and shippy."

I am all for everyone shipping whatever they want but this version of Batman should be kept away from all other living beings. Especially young boys.

[matthew-zard]

[tiger-in-the-flightdeck]

DC hot takes and headcanons that would get a portion of the fandom thirsting for your blood if they knew you held this belief, 2.0!

I was surprised by the results of my previous poll, so time to make some more waves!

I plan on doing a few more of these, and doing something with the results of all of them.

Again, some of these are my anti-takes, so no coming to try to feast on my soul!