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lovely-ateez · 4 years ago

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Vampire Shift~

ꕥPosted: 5/23/21

ꕥGenre: Fluff, Smut, Angst, College!au, Horror!au

ꕥPairing: Fem!Reader x Vampire!Jongho (feat Wooyoung and Minho from skz)

ꕥWord Count: ~5.9k (whoops)

ꕥWarnings: Horror themes, Language, Thigh riding, Unprotected sex, Mentions of blood and blood sucking (please lmk if I missed anything)

ꕥTag List: @cappujinho @bobateastay

ꕥA/N: I hope you all don’t a more spooky concept! Halloween is my favorite holiday and even though its May, it’s always spooky season to me lolol. Also! Feel free to listen to Vampire Shift by All Time Low while reading this (it’s only on YouTube I cry) since this is inspired by the song :)

It was a terrible idea, really, to work the night shift at a gas station alone. Even more so when you’re a young woman whose only defense is the pepper spray on her key chain and 911 on speed dial. Alas, college bills don’t pay themselves and every spare opportunity to get cash was one I had to take.

The digital clock sitting on the counter next to me briefly flashed, indicating another hour had gone by. It was currently four a.m. and it was safe to say I was losing my mind. I’d worked for five hours now, and not a customer had come in. That was the only advantage, really. So long as no one was around my boss let me finish any assignments I had, which came in handy on more than one occasion.

I was only six paragraphs into a five page report and had been staring at my laptop screen for over an hour, feeling beyond brain dead. I was assigned the topic of financial statements and country trade deficits, and wanted to cry every minute I thought about it. I was half convinced to pay someone to write the report for me.

The ringing of a bell indicated a customer opening the door and I closed my laptop to peer around the counter, ready to greet whoever entered. The first man to catch my attention was wearing sunglasses which fazed me, but I tried not to stare. The man that followed had black hair with blond underneath, a combination that I strangely liked. Both men were donned in all back, their faces stoic. They were attractive, I had to admit, but neither were my type.

And then, the last man entered. He looked over to me as he walked through the door, giving me a nod and a slight smile. His slicked back black hair matched his black ripped jeans and highlighted his red leather jacket. He was so handsome he looked like he jumped out of a magazine and I had to suppress a ‘wow’. A string of butterflies fluttered in my stomach and I did my best to ignore them, not even knowing his name.

The three of them wandered through the aisles until I could no longer see them, and I scolded myself for being so thrown off that I forgot say any form of a greeting. I sighed and turned my attention back to my laptop, opening it and blankly staring at the screen. My ears perked when I heard the men’s hushed voices.

“Y’oughta get that girl’s number. I saw the way you looked at her.”

“Yeah, Jongho. She’s pretty cute. If you don’t get her number you know I will.”

“Shut up.” One of the men, Jongho apparently, responded with a laugh, “Let’s just get some snacks, okay? It’s gonna be a long night. Also I’m buying tonight so get whatever.”

A smile crept on my face and I looked down, fiddling with my thumbs.

They think I’m cute. Maybe Jongho’s the one in red?

I heard the bell ring once more and a girl entered who I vaguely remembered from high school. She was popular but for good reason, probably being one of the nicest people I’d ever met. Our circle of friends overlapped slightly so I’d spent a fair amount of time with her. She was smart as a whip and gorgeous all the same, which seemed to stay with her. She looked bright, long red hair falling around her face, freckles still prominent as ever.

We met eyes and she smiled, “Hey y/n!”

I smiled and waved, “Hey Annabelle. How’ve you been? I haven’t seen you in awhile.”

“Good! I got into my dream college and it’s been great, although I’ve had to take some pretty hard classes.” She giggled, walking towards me. It’s honestly not too far from here. You go to Westgate University, right?”

I nodded and I put my laptop aside. She spoke again, genuinely excited for me, “That’s awesome! Congrats!”

“Thanks,” I smiled, “I’m taking it you got into Orholt?”

“I did! I was really-”

One of the men that entered earlier—the one still wearing sunglasses—shouted the redhead’s name and caught her attention, “Hey Anna do you want a Redbull or a Five Hour Energy?”

“Redbull! I’m not a monster.” She laughed.

The man nodded and walked toward us with several drinks and snacks in his hands.

“Oh! I want to introduce you to my boyfriend!” Annabelle turned to the man still wearing sunglasses and reached for his arm, “This is Minho. I met him at Orholt.”

Minho gave me a slight nod as I introduced myself and he placed the food and drinks on the counter. I began to scan the items, the mindless routine that I was used to by now. The loud sound of laughter made me look up, seeing the two other men approach us and place their snacks down as well. I watched them long enough to notice the way two-tone—my new affectionate name for the man with blond and black hair, I decided—shamelessly checked me out, a cocky smile on his face when I caught him. I just let out a small laugh before resuming my task, watching his confused reaction in my peripheral vision.

“Oh my god I totally forgot to introduce you to my friends.” Annabelle giggled and pointed to two-tone, “This is Wooyoung.”

“Hiya, Wooyoung.” I said with a confident smile, enjoying the way he still had a slightly confused look on his face.

“And this,” Annabelle nodded towards the man in red, “This is Jongho. Both him and Wooyoung go to Orholt, too.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Jongho. I’m y/n.”

“Very nice to meet you.” The man smiled before he sent me a wink.

I had never been a particularly shy person, but as he did so my eyes darted down as I felt my face flush. I didn’t notice the gears turning in Annabelle’s head as she put the pieces together.

I placed the final items in the bag, raising my head as Annabelle addressed me, “You know I’m having a bonfire tomorrow night at my place and you should totally come!”

I stopped to think, first trying to remember if I worked the next day, then wondering if I was willing to go the bonfire when I realized I didn’t have to.

She sensed my hesitancy and her face fell, “Aw do you work tomorrow night? It’s a Saturday!”

“Oh no, I don’t. I...” I stopped to think for a minute. Although I likely didn’t know anyone else who would be there, I was familiar with Annabelle’s house, which brought me a bit of comfort, “Are all of you going?”

Annabelle gave a knowing smile, “Yes. All of us will be here.”

I nodded, accepting the credit card Jongho gave me, quickly after handing them the bags, and returning his card, “I’ll go.”

“Yay! We’ve gotta head out but I’ll send you the details. You’ve still got the same number, right?”

“Yeah I do.”

“Alrighty! I’ll see you tomorrow then!”

Annabelle left with a wave, her boyfriend on her arm and Wooyoung behind her. To my surprise, Jongho didn’t leave with them, the cocky look on his face all but telling me why he stayed.

I looked at him with wide eyes, playing innocent. “Can I help you?”

He placed an arm on the counter, his dark eyes seeming to put me under a spell. The confidence he was radiating was almost palpable and I felt myself being pulled to him. It was intimidating, to be honest.

“You’re really cute and I want your number.”

I let out a surprised laugh, “You really don’t beat around the bush, do you?”

“No, not really,” He propped his other arm on the counter, leaning towards me and raising an eyebrow, “So what do you say, doll?”

A smile crept on my face as I mirrored his actions and leaned towards him, “You gonna memorize my number? Or do you have a phone I can put my number into?”

Jongho’s smile got brighter as he reached to grab his phone, handing it to me. “You’re a firecracker, aren’t you?”

I shrugged, “I’d like to think so.”

When I handed his phone back, our fingers brushed and I could’ve sworn I felt sparks shoot through me at the simple interaction.

“Well I need to head out before the rest of them get too annoyed,” He nodded towards the exit where Annabelle, Minho, and Wooyoung left, “But it was enchanting to meet you, y/n.” He bowed, drawing a laugh from me.

“Ah yes. You as well, absolutely delightful.”

He gave me a smile, “I’ll text you later.”

"Sounds good. I’ll hold you to your word.”

“I’d expect nothing less.” And with that, he was out the door, leaving my heart a fluttering mess.

Me [8:37pm] So is there a dress code for tonight?

Annabelle [8:42pm] Nope! Wear whatever you’re comfortable with. I’m wearing this if it helps at all!

Annabelle [8:43pm] 1 Image Attached*

Me [8:45pm] So leather jackets and crop tops?

Annabelle [8:48pm] Haha sure! We can match!

Me [8:51pm] Lol bet. See you at eleven :)

Annabelle [8:51pm] See you then!

I started the process of slipping on a white cropped top followed by my light washed ripped jeans. I knew I was getting ready far earlier than I could have, but something about new events made me anxious and I had to make sure I looked nice. I giggled at the black leather jacket I was throwing over my shoulders, not having worn it since high school. In the middle of debating whether or not I should add another layer of mascara to my lashes, my phone dinged.

New Number [8:59pm] Y/n this better be you. This is Jongho and I’m texting you for a really important reason and I need you to reply quick

Me [9:00pm] Yeah it’s me. What’s going on are you okay??

New Number [9:02pm] I’m gonna go grab some food before I head to Anna’s. You wanna come with?

Me [9:02pm] Oh my god don’t do that to me, you buffoon. You scared me so bad rip

[New Number name changed to A Cute Buffoon]

Me [9:03pm] But sure I’m down lol. Here’s my address btw

Me [9:03pm] 1 Location Shared*

It occurred to me perhaps a bit too late that I was sharing my address with someone that I’d met only once and in a gas station.

I mean, he’s friends with Annabelle so he’s gotta be good right? God I hope so. I thought to myself.

A Cute Buffoon [9:04] Then it’s a date :) I live pretty close so I’ll be over in 10. That work for you?

Me [9:06pm] Fine with me!

A Cute Buffoon [9:06pm] Sounds good. I’ll see you soon ;)

I set down my phone and thanked myself for already doing my makeup. I checked myself out in the mirror, satisfied with my appearance and proud of how well my makeup turned out. I grabbed my bottle of perfume and spritzed the liquid in the air, letting it gradually fall on me so it wouldn’t be too overpowering.

You look beautiful, babe.

The waiting game was harder than I thought, not knowing what to do except awkwardly sit around and play an assortment of phone games. When exactly ten minutes had passed I heard my doorbell ring and I lifted myself from my couch, grinning at his punctuality.

I opened the door to see Jongho holding a bouquet of flowers, a smug look on his face. “Lovely to meet you here, stranger.”

I wanted to make a joke back but I couldn’t seem to think of anything, too surprised by the flowers in his hands. It wasn’t anything extravagant, the small bouquet of violets, but I felt my heart swell.

It’s perfect. He’s perfect.

My voice was small when I spoke, “No one’s ever given me flowers before.”

His eyebrows furrowed as a confused look painted his face, “Really?”

I nodded, taking the flowers from his outreached hands and smelling their sweet fragrance, “They’re beautiful.”

My eyes flickered to his, the tender look on his face making me feel as if I was melting on the spot, “You’re beautiful.”

I squealed, my face undoubtedly turning pink while my mind short circuited. I’d never become so shy around someone before and the only thing I could think of to say in response was another ‘thank you’ followed by ‘I’ll go get a vase for these.’

I opened my door further, rummaging through my cabinets for a vase when I noticed Jongho was still standing by the door, “You can come in, you know? That’s why I opened the door.”

He laughed nervously, “Sorry about that. Force of habit, I guess.”

I raised my eyebrows in a teasing manner, “What? Are you a vampire? Can you only come in if someone invites you?”

I thought I saw a flicker of shock on his face for a moment, but it was gone before I could register it and I shrugged it off, my eyes finding the perfect vase for the flowers.

“It’s just how I was raised.”

“I get that.” I placed the flowers in the vase, giving them a bit of water before walking up to Jongho and gently patting his cheek, “Your good manners are appreciated.”

He laughed in surprise, full gummy smile on display as he playfully swatted my hand away from his face, “Alright, alright. Let’s head out already.”

I made a sound of agreement before noticing a slight pink on his ears. I was temped to tease him, but ultimately decided to save it for later. If I could fluster him once I knew I could do it again.

The diner we went to was one I’d never heard of before, let alone been to, and I was beyond frustrated that I didn’t even know about it’s existence. It was an adorable fifties style diner and even the attire the waiters were wearing fit the theme.

“This is the cutest place to ever exist, I’m convinced.” I said as we sat down on the same side of a bright red booth.

“I really hoped you would like it. This is my favorite restaurant ever and they have fantastic milkshakes. If you’d like to share one for desert, I’m all for it.” A wink.

I bit my lip and hid my face in the menu that was placed in front of us, thankful for any method of escape.

“You’re so cute.”

“Ahh no don’t say things like that.” I giggled from behind the menu.

His hand grabbed the top of the menu, pulling it down so he could see me, “Why’s that?”

“Because you make me nervous. Like a good nervous!” I tried to explain, which only resulted in becoming even more embarrassed, “I-I mean I’m excited to be around you but I’m also nervous. I hope that doesn’t sound weird.” I cringed at myself. Never in my life did I think I’d be blushing and stuttering over some man, but my god did he prove me wrong.

“Not at all,” he reached over to take my hand in his, “because I feel it, too.”

Before I could properly react our waitress came over, taking our order and effectively saving me from becoming a human tomato.

We handed our menus back to her after ordering and she looked at us with a soft smile, “You two make a cute couple.”

While I was a bit too stunned to say anything, Jongho didn’t seem to have the same problem and went along with it, “Thank you, ma’am. That’s kind of you to say.”

When she left, Jongho leaned closer to me, “I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable by saying that we we’re a couple. I thought that-”

“No, I didn’t mind it!” I bit my tongue after likely saying that way too fast with far too much enthusiasm, but I meant it, “I didn’t mind it,” I said again, softer this time.

The tips of his ears once again turned a faint shade of pink, “Good to know.”

The food was as wonderful as it possibly could’ve been, their fries alone being one of the best things I’d ever consumed. Just as Jongho suggested, we shared a milkshake, which led to shy eye contact and laughter and my crush becoming stronger by the minute.

Just as Jongho paid and we were about to leave, a certain song began to play and he looked at me with an air of mischief, holding out his hand to me, “Dance with me.”

I took his hand, trying to hide my smile but failing. He led me away from the table and next to the jukebox. The area surrounding it was more open, probably with the intention for people to dance near it. He grabbed my waist, holding the hand of mine that wasn’t placed on his chest and looking at me in a way that could make any woman fall in love on the spot. We swayed to the music and I couldn’t help but feel full. Like I’d found all that I’d ever need.

Put your head on my shoulder~

“Do you know this song?” He asked with a smile.

I scoffed, “Of course I do! It’s one of my favorites.”

“It’s one of mine, too.”

Hold me in your arms, baby~

I mouthed along to the words as I felt the need to prove it to him. As if to one up me, Jongho began to sing along, his gorgeous voice amazing me.

Squeeze me oh so tight, show me~

That you love me, too~

I blushed as he looked at me while singing along, becoming a bit flustered himself when the lyrics clicked with him.

Put your lips next to mine dear~

Won’t you kiss me once, baby~

As if we were in sync our eyes darted to the other’s lips at the same time. I could feel Jongho’s breathing becoming heavier before he said in a hushed tone, “Can I kiss you?”

“Please.” Was all I could respond before I pressed my lips to his, fireworks igniting inside me when he kissed me back. His lips were so soft and warm and as crazy as it sounded, he felt like home. I felt him smile against my lips as the music continued to play.

Maybe you and I will fall in love~

The fire was loud, crackling and lighting up the faces of all those crowded those around it. It was essentially the only source of light in the dark of the night, except for the distant lights still on in Annabelle’s house. My hands were interlocked with Jongho’s as we sat around it’s warmth, both of us finding it hard to separate from one another.

Conversation was flowing all around us, and I was relieved to find that everyone I had talked to was kind and welcoming. I was more nervous than I realized, but having Jongho next to my side alone calmed me. Someone around the fire mentioned an old story involving Annabelle and I began to wonder where she was, having not seen her since Jongho and I first arrived. I mentioned I was going to look for her and he nodded, at first wanting to join me but then getting pulled into conversation with one of his former classmates. I told him I’d head off on my own and he nodded again.

I looked around what seemed to be the entire property and still there was no sight of her. At that moment I heard yelling coming from her house, startling me. I felt my blood run cold when I recognized one of the voices as Annabelle’s. The yelling didn’t sound like it was out of fear, but instead more aggressive, out of pure anger. Without thinking I ran inside, hoping to calm the situation but instead found what seemed to be out of a work of fiction.

An unfamiliar man was on the ground, obviously trying to get away from a hidden figure before him that seemed to be cloaked in darkness. He let out a sound that I’d never heard a human make, one that I couldn’t even compare to something I’d heard before, and a shiver ran down my back. As the figure took a step forward I recognized it as Annabelle, or what seemed to be some version of her. Her normally grey eyes were now bright red, sharp fangs on display as she snarled at the man. A group of people were surrounding them, alarmed looks on their faces but hardly trying to intervene.

“What the hell?” I whispered, my eyes wide as I tried to back away without anyone noticing. But of course, I just had to step on an empty soda can, all eyes pointing my way. As I looked at the people around me, their expressions seemed to mirror mine and I swallowed, suddenly feeling immensely claustrophobic.

I met eyes with Annabelle and she seemed to change in a flash, her eyes returning to their former color and fangs disappearing. She looked more panicked than I had ever seen her which only scared me more. She was always able to keep her stressors under control, but as she stared back at me, I saw a version of her I never had before.

I was barely able to form a sentence, adrenaline coursing through me at a rampant rate, “Um...”

Annabelle slowly walked towards me, “Oh—hey! Sorry I disappeared for a while but how’s the party going? Are you having fun?” Panic was still evident in her voice but I knew she was trying to keep a hold of the situation.

“I...I don’t-”

A stern voice came from left, and I nervously turned to meet Jongho, an unreadable expression crossing his face, “Y/n.”

“Yeah?” My voice squeaked as I began to regret agreeing to come along in the first place, still hyper aware of all the eyes on me.

“Come with me.”

His eyes softened at my panicked state and he held out a hand, “Please?”

I was hesitant, but being anywhere away from the crowd and whatever Annabelle turned into seemed to be a good idea. I took his hand and watched as he exchanged a look with Annabelle that seemed to calm her. Turning on his heels he led me back to the bonfire, sitting in a chair and motioning for me to do the same. Seeing no one around us gave me a feeling of both anxiety and comfort, and I wasn’t quite sure which feeling was winning at the moment.

“Well I’m sure you have plenty of questions.” He started, “I won’t lie to you and try to convince you what you saw wasn’t real, because it was, but I need you to know that no one is going to harm you. That guy is Anna’s roommate and they get into an argument at least once a week. Sometimes it can be nasty, but they never get physical and neither would ever hurt anyone unprovoked. No one here would.”

I was silent for a few minutes, trying to process what I saw on top of the time bomb of information he dropped on me. “Is she...is everyone....are you a vampire?” I whispered the last words, almost too stunned and afraid to say out loud.

He smiled slightly, his kind eyes making me feel safe. “Yes. We’re what you’d call vampires.”

I took a breath, almost afraid to hear the answer to my question, “Am I in any danger by being here?”

“No, everyone here is good. They don’t pose any threat. There are plenty of dangerous vampires but we stay away from them. Besides,” He placed an arm around my waist, playfulness in his eyes, “If there were, I’d protect you from them.”

“Oh? And how don’t I know you’re not dangerous?”

He leaned closer to me, clearly enjoying this, “You don’t, I suppose. Doesn’t that make it fun?”

“That’s very much debatable,” I smiled for a moment before a frown took over, “Everyone just seemed really...I don’t know, startled I guess?”

Jongho let out a loud sigh, looking down at the ground for a few seconds before looking back up at me, “Humans aren’t normally invited to these parties. It’s assumed that everyone here is a vampire. The perfume that you’re wearing, whatever the hell it is, is masking your scent. If I didn’t meet you before today I wouldn’t have known you were human. I guess Anna didn’t tell everyone, either.” He placed a hand on my knee and looked at me with kind eyes, “How are you feeling?”

“Surprisingly calm considering that I just learned vampires exist.”

Jongho laughed, “Yeah I’d say you’re taking it pretty well. Like I said earlier though, I’m sure you’ve got plenty of questions, so fire away.”

“Yeah I have a few.” I hesitated, hoping he wouldn’t be offended by my question, “Exactly how old are you?”

“Oh are you gonna age shame me?”

“No but it’s probably an important thing to know...since we kissed and all.”

He laughed again and leaned back in his chair, placing his arms behind his head, “How old do you think I am?”

I used his question as an excuse for my eyes to wander over his body. He was beyond attractive, very clearly fit and he knew it, which equal parts pissed me off and turned me on. As hard as I tried, I kept finding myself being pulled to his thighs. Even through his jeans I could tell he had strong thighs and I had to press my fingernails into my palm to keep from drooling. “From your appearance? Early twenties. From what age fiction usually tells us vampires are? I’d guess you’re a hundred and three.”

Jongho nodded with a smile, “I’m not quite that old but that’s a fair guess. You had it right the first time. I’m a pure born and we actually age, but we don’t age as quickly as humans. I’m twenty.”

“Pure born?”

“It means both of my parents are vampires.”

I nodded as another question came to mind, a smile on my lips. “Do you sparkle in the daylight?”

“Oh my god,” He covered his face with his hands, a mixture of a groan and a laugh escaping his mouth, “No, we do not sparkle in daylight, “His hands came to rest on his knees, “But it sucks that we really shouldn’t be in direct sunlight for over two hours a day. That’s normally the rule to go by. It’ll burn us if we’re in it for much longer than that.”

“So do werewolves and witches and everything like that exist, too?”

“Yeah pretty much. We don’t all get along, but we have to coexist. It’s something we’ve struggled with for a while, unfortunately. Basically everything you’d believe to be supernatural exists.”

I was silent for a while, not really knowing what else to say.

“Y/n? Are you doing okay? If you’re not comfortable being here I can drive you home right now or if you’d rather be alone I can call an Uber or—”

My heart skipped a beat at his kindness. “No, I’m okay. I guess I’m just surprised I’m learning about this just now.”

“We do a good job of hiding it. Also it was probably a given, but keep this as a secret if you can. Having a lot of people know about our existence can be risky.”

I gave him a silent nod, unintentionally leaning closer to him. The sound of approaching footsteps made me jump into Jongho’s arms. I didn’t know why I found comfort in him, knowing that he could be dangerous as well, but he’d been nothing but sweet to me. I had no reason to fear him.

Annabelle approached us but stopped, taking a few steps back when she saw how I was buried in Jongho’s arms.

“Hey y/n.” She rubbed her arm, looking down as if she’d done something wrong.

“I guess Jongho probably told you everything at this point. I’m really sorry if I scared you and I understand if you don’t want to be friends anymore.” Even in the dark I could see tears beginning to stream down her cheeks and I felt a pain in my chest.

I got up from Jongho’s hold and wrapped my arms around her, feeling her stiffen, “I trust you, Annabelle.”

Those four words seemed to relax her and she returned my hug, still sniffling, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. We aren’t supposed to tell anyone and I thought you might hate me—”

I pulled back, “Why the hell would I hate you? You’re still you.”

She laughed through tears, gripping me tighter, thanking me over and over for not pushing her away.

We’re gonna be okay. It’s all gonna be okay.

Not too long after, Jongho drove me home. The ride was more silent than when we were headed to Annabelle’s house, but the air wasn’t heavy or uncomfortable. Feeling tired, I laid my head on Jongho’s shoulder, faintly hearing ‘sleep well, baby’ before drifting asleep.

When I woke, I was in my bed. I reached for my phone on the bedside table and found a little note placed next to it that read:

I hope you don’t mind that I carried you inside. I tried to wake you for like five minutes but you were out cold. Anyways, I had a really good time with you yesterday and I hope you had fun too :) Text me when you wake so I know you’re okay. -J

I looked at my clock and saw that it was still early, but I texted Jongho anyway.

Me [3:00am] Not sure if you’re still up, but I really enjoyed yesterday, too. I’m exhausted so I’m gonna go back to sleep but I just wanted to say I’m okay and everything is good :))

A Cute Buffoon [3:00am] Sleep well, darling. We can talk in the morning

It had been roughly a month since Jongho and I started dating, and while I felt like I knew him pretty well, we had only known each other a little over a month, on top of the fact that he was a vampire which was essentially an entire separate culture. I’d asked him most questions I had early throughout our relationship, but one in particular kept replaying in my mind.

We were currently sitting on the couch in my apartment, cuddling each other. The TV was on but neither of us were really watching it. I was far more interested in the warm body in front of me, and based off of how Jongho was looking at me, the feeling was mutual.

I bit my lip, anxiously mulling over the question I’d wanted to ask him for weeks. I didn’t know how he would take it, let alone how I would bring it up, but I needed to ask at some point. Knowing he could probably sense my nerves, I gave in. “Jongho, can a human turn into a vampire?”

He hummed, turning to face me. “Why do you ask?”

“I just...I didn’t know if it could happen or not.”

Jongho chuckled, “Yeah it’s possible. It’s a long ass process to go through though, and there’s a lot that can go wrong, so it rarely happens.”

I shifted in my seat, trying not to appear overly interested. “Why is that? What can go wrong?

He smiled and raised a brow, his cocky persona resurfacing, “You sound so eager to know, dear. Do you want to become a vampire?” His eyes briefly flickered towards my lips before he tilted his head, dragging his soft lips across my neck. I let out a gasp when I felt the tips of his teeth lightly scraping the skin, “Or maybe you’re just looking for an excuse for me to put my mouth on you?”

Like with anything that exuded him, I felt myself becoming quickly overwhelmed, my mind now hazy and distant. I shut my eyes in an attempt to gain some semblance of control over myself.

“Your thoughts are swirling, doll.” Jongho began leaving gentle kisses along the side of my jaw, “Don’t think too much. Just let me take care of you. Okay?”

“Okay.” I said through a short breath, knowing we’d just have to have the conversation another time.

We’d had sex before, so it wasn’t like this was new territory for us, but every time felt like the first, leaving me just as out of breath each time.

He lifted me and placed me on his thigh, dragging me across his flexed muscles. I felt my eyes roll back at the simple motion, my need growing at an embarrassing rate. I grabbed his shoulders as I began to drag myself against him, whines and whimpers spilling from my lips.

“God you’re hot,” Jongho said through hot breaths, beginning to kiss my neck, no doubt leaving marks.

“Thanks I try.” I managed to say, pleased when Jongho laughed.

“You don’t even have to, and it’s completely unfair.” His hands moved under my shirt and danced along my skin, “It’s like you’re an angel come to life.”

I let out a loud moan, feeling tears well in my eyes from his praise, “You always make me feel so beautiful when I’m with you.”

Jongho responded with a smile, carrying me to my bedroom and laying me down on the bed while hurriedly discarding both of our clothes.

“You’re always so eager, babe.”

He nuzzled my neck as he climbed on top of me, his hands finding my own and holding them, “As if you’re not.”

“I never said I wasn’t.”

He then moved in between my thighs, teasing me with his fingers as he ran them along my wet slit, occasionally rubbing my clit, drawing small whines from me.

“Jongho please just fuck me already.”

“Sweetheart, do you even think you’re wet enough for me?” He cooed.

Feeling frustrated, I pushed my fingers inside myself with ease, pulling them out and spreading them so he could see my essence dripping down my fingers, “I don’t know you tell me.” I said with far more sass than I intended.

Jongho’s eyes widened at the sight and wasted no time positioning his cock at my entrance, pushing in and letting out the most beautiful groans.

Neither of us ever bothered to use protection because, to put it simply, vampires couldn’t get humans pregnant. It was only possible when both partners were vampires, and we took full advantage of that.

“Fuck—baby you feel amazing. You’re so warm and tight ohmygod.” Jongho moaned as he began to move, thrusting in and out of me at a steady pace.

I clenched around him, loving when he was vocal. His sounds helped get me off just as much as his actions, at times it seemed.

“You feel...really good...too.” I said through heavy breaths. And as much as I wanted to last longer in bed, with Jongho, I never could.

“I don’t know if it’s because you’re a vampire and you’ve got like magic powers or something or maybe you’re just a sex god—but holy shit...I’m close.”

He threw back his head and had the audacity to laugh, something I really couldn’t stay mad at with how good he was making me feel. “Babe it’s been like six minutes.”

“Don’t be an asshole.” I joked, my laugh turning into a moan. It only spurred Jongho on, making him angle one of my legs up higher, hitting deeper inside of me.

“I know you’re close, baby. I can feel it. Cum for me, baby girl. Let go for me.”

He reached down to tease my sensitive nub, drawing quick circles until I was seeing stars, chanting his name like a prayer.

After Jongho came down from his high, he disappeared into the bathroom as he always did, coming back with a warm towel. As he pressed the towel to my thighs I tried to ask again.

“So...about the human to vampire thing?”

“Well,” Jongho sighed, “I didn’t think I’d be able to distract you forever.” He smiled, “It’s mostly done because couples want to stay together. The thing is though, the vampire obviously gets a taste of the human’s blood and it can be hard to stop once you’ve marked them, especially since smell is such a big allure for us.”

He took a long breath, “Then the human will almost always pass out, and needs to be taken care of for the next couple days because they’ll be so weak. Another problem is that the scent of their blood will be amplified during those days and it’ll be harder for the vampire to not, you know...” He looked away, not able to say the words. I knew what he meant, we both did. In some cases, vampires would kill their human partners for of their blood. Sometimes it was beyond their control. Just a primal need that would betray them. “Then their scent is more easily detected by other vampires and the whole thing is just kinda a mess. I think I’ve only heard of five attempts and only one of them was successful.”

I nodded, not really knowing what to say.

“And then on top of it all, it can be harder for the human to adjust and it can put a lot of pressure on the relationship. Human and vampire relationships are dangerous.”

His face was serious as he ran a hand through my hair. I looked up at him and leaned into his touch.

He cleared his throat and averted his eyes, a shy behavior I hadn’t seen from him before, “I guess it’s important for you to decide then.” His eyes met mine again, “Is this still something you want to continue?”

“Our relationship?”

“Yeah.”

“Of course, are you crazy? You mean the world to me.” I swallowed, realizing he hadn’t voiced his own thoughts, “What about you? Do you want this?”

“I think you have a pretty good idea of what I want.” He smiled and pressed a quick kiss to my forehead, his eyes sparkling.

“Hey Jongho?”

He hummed, looking at me.

“I want to spend forever with you.”

#ateez #kpop #imagines #ateez au #ateez fluff #ateez imagines #ateez smut #atzinc #ateez vampire au #vampire au #jongho smut #jongho imagines

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writemywaytoyourheart · 4 years ago

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BTS Reaction: When They're Whipped For You

Requested: yEs

a/n: your bitz is back from her unofficial hiatus. Miss me?

Genre: fluffff

____________________

KIM SEOKJIN:

"Princess, I'm home!" Jin calls the second he walks into the house. He sets his things in the coat closet, then plops himself onto the couch with a tired groan. A few moments later, you walk out from the back, a book in your hands that you're reading while you walk. You look up, and a huge smile breaks out on your face when you see him. "Jin!" You drop your book on the couch and climb into his lap, causing him to chuckle because of how cute you are.

After you give him a big hug, you pull back and smile when he leans forward to kiss you on the lips sweetly. "How was your day, sweetie?" He asks kindly, covering your face in feathery kisses. You giggle at the ticklish feeling his lips leave, "Oh it was alright. How was practice?" "Tiring." He mumbles, still leaving little kisses on your cheeks. When he eventually pulls away, he glances down and sees that you're dressed in one of his giant t-shirts, and you're basically swimming in it. "Aw, you look so cute." Jin laughs. Your cheeks turn pink at his words and you try to hide your face in his shoulder, making him laugh again. "Goodness, y/n. What am I to do with you?" Jin wraps his arms around you tighter, a smile gracing his handsome features as he listens to your soft breath. "I love you."

MIN YOONGI:

"Yoongi! Yoongi! Listen to this, listen." Your boyfriend looks up from his laptop and swivels around in his chair to face you, who has just come into his studio. "What's up, baby?" You sit on the couch across from his chair and hold your phone up, then you clear your throat and push play on your phone. One of Yoongi's songs starts coming from the speaker and he looks at you in confusion. Then it all makes sense when the rap comes on. Your boyfriend tries his best to keep it together, but when you start trying to rap along to his part, you're just too cute for him to handle. He starts to chuckle, but you're too engrossed on getting the words and tempo right that you don't even notice. After the song finishes, there's a giant smile on your face. "How'd I do?" Yoongi smothers the giggle coming up and looks at you with a serious expression before giving you a thumbs up. "You did great!" "Yay!" You jump up and wrap your arms around his neck, "Does that mean I can do a song with you sometime?" Yoongi laughs as he holds you close, "I'd love that. Let's do it."

JUNG HOSEOK:

"Hobi? Will you watch my dance and give me some pointers?" You ask shyly, your hands wringing together. Your fiance looks up and a bright smile spreads across his face, "Sure, babe!" After you've gotten the music set up, you get into position in front of the couch where he's sitting. You nervously rock back and forth, then you see him smile at you encouragingly and your worries dissapate. The second the music starts and Hoseok recognizes it as one of BTS' songs, his eyes sparkle. You're doing your best, but the nerves come back when it's Hoseok's dance break. You wanted to learn his part and perform it just for him. But Hobi is a professional, and you feel like his moves are way out of your league. When the song finishes, you bow and smile, Hoseok stands up and claps loudly, "You did amazing, love!" "Thanks." You say uncertainly, feeling a bit self-conscious about the dance break still. Hoseok senses it immediately and walks over to hug you. "I messed up the dance break, though." Hobi shakes his head, then he turns you around and holds you so that your back is pressed against his chest, then he takes your hands and holds them out to the sides. "Just go like this," He moves your hands with his, "And this. That's all there is to it." You smile as he starts to move your arms and makes you do a silly dance. Soon the both of you are laughing and dancing around the living room, Hobi smiling and watching you sweetly the entire time.

KIM NAMJOON:

Namjoon looks up from his phone, where he's been talking to their manager about a few things concerning the upcoming shows. He's pretty stressed about all the changes they're going to have to make to make sure it's perfect. But when he glances at you from over his phone, a small smile forms on his face. You're sitting on the couch with your legs crossed, your nose in your sketchbook as you glance up at him every once in a while. When you look up and see him watching you, your cheeks turn pink and you set your pencil down. Namjoon speaks gently, "Don't stop, keep drawing. Sorry, I distracted you." You shake your head at that, "You didn't distract me." "What are you drawing?" Namjoon asks, his gaze dropping to your sketchbook. "Uh, nothing." "It can't be nothing." Namjoon chuckles, then scoots closer to you, "May I see it? I love your drawings." Your cheeks turn even pinker and you clutch the sketchbook to your chest. "It isn't finished yet...but if you really want to see..." Namjoon nods eagerly, his face brightening when you open the little book and turn it to show him. On the crisp white paper, is him. Namjoon blinks, then leans in closer. "Me? You were drawing me?" He asks in disbelief as his eyes scan the image on the paper. It looks amazing, so lifelike. "Babe, this is awesome!" He suddenly exclaims, startling you. Namjoon feels his own cheeks start to heat up at the thought that you've been watching him quietly and drawing such a beautiful picture, the way you see him. "Thank you." You mumble shyly. You're taken by surprise when Namjoon pulls you into his lap, wrapping his arms around you and tucking his head into the space between your neck and shoulder. "I love you, y/n." "I love you too, Joonie." Your boyfriend sighs happily and hugs you tighter, "I'm so lucky to have you."

PARK JIMIN:

Just as you're dipping your mop into the bucket of water to get started on mopping the kitchen, the next song comes on and you smile when you hear the Disney tune start to play. The next minute, you're dancing around the kitchen and singing your heart out. You're home alone, so why not? After you're done with the mopping, you wring out the mop and put it away, still humming to the happy tunes. Then you move into the living room and start pulling all the movies out of the little cupboard you and your husband keep them in. You don't hear the front door open over the music from Beauty and The Beast that's now coming from the speakers as you sing along loudly. Jimin sets his things down and pulls off his shoes, a smile growing on his face when he hears your voice singing to the Disney song. He comes around the corner and sees you sorting through the movies and organizing them as you hum. His heart flips over in his chest as he watches you quietly. Unaware of your audience, you just keep organizing, then you get a weird feeling that someone is watching you, so you turn and see your husband leaning against the wall and smiling sweetly at you. "Oh, you scared me." You say as you get up and move to the speaker that's still playing. You pause the music and turn to see Jimin has come closer and he's reaching for your hands. You let him take them and he pulls you into a close hug. "You're so cute, what am I supposed to do with you?" He mumbles into your hair, and you smile. "Just love me." You reply cheekily and you feel Jimin laugh. "Always."

KIM TAEHYUNG:

"Tae! Tae wake up!" Taehyung groans in protest when he feels you pounce on him in your excitement. "It's Christmas! Wake up!" You squeal and start trying to tickle him. Your boyfriend laughs tiredly as he grabs your hands to stop you from tickling him, "What time is it?" "Seven." Another groan leaves his mouth, "When did you get here?" "Just five minutes ago, Jin let me in. He said to come and wake you up." Taehyung finally peels his eyes open and he's greeted with your face. He smiles sleepily, "You're so beautiful. Merry Christmas, baby." "Thank you." You say shyly, "Merry Christmas, Taetae." Then you hop off his bed, "Come on! Jin made breakfast and we'll open presents after food he says!" Then you run out of his bedroom and he hears you talking to his oldest brother. Tae chuckles as he forces himself to get up and dress. After breakfast, you and the rest of Bangtan and some of their girlfriends, are all sitting around the Christmas tree. There are presents piled up and pouring around the base. Tae watches you happily as you tear the wrapping paper from your presents and your eyes light up with every single present you get, big or small. At one point, you look over and see him watching you and you send him a big smile. Tae scoots over and places a sweet kiss on your cheek, "I think I love you too much, it isn't good for my heart." That makes you giggle and you cuddle into him, making his heart race. Tae puts his arm around you, keeping you happy and warm. He just can't get enough of you, that's for sure.

JEON JUNGKOOK:

"Do you want a bite of mine?" Jungkook holds his chocolate iced donut out to you and smiles sweetly. You nod and reach over to take it, then you take a small bite before handing it back. "Mmm! It's delicious! Wanna try mine?" You hand over your jelly-filled donut when Jungkook nods happily, then you take it back after he's had a bite. "I love food." Jungkook hums happily and you nod before taking another bite, "Me too." You say around the bite of donut in your mouth. Your boyfriend looks up and laughs when he sees chocolate icing around your mouth, "Honey, you have something on your face." "Oh, I do?" Your cheeks turn pink and you thank him quietly when he reaches over with a napkin and gently wipes the corners of your mouth clean. "There you go, all better." "Thanks, Koo." "Anytime, love." The two of you keep eating, but you don't notice the way Jungkook stares at you with heart eyes as you devour the sweet treat. Your cheeks are constantly stuffed like a little squirrel and his heart does little tumbles in his chest. "I love you." You look up at him, your mouth full. Then a smile spreads on your face from his words. "I love you too, Koo. And donuts!"

_________________

a/n: I've missed you honeybunches

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entracteofevil · 4 years ago

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Round Table Discussion with the Cover Illustrators

Entr’acte of Evil, page 142-145

--First, everyone please introduce yourselves.

Ichika: I’ve been responsible for the first cover and the illustrations for the series. My name is Ichika.

Suzunosuke: I am Suzunosuke. I normally just draw what I want to. I was able to make the cover for the second book.

You: I am You, and I was charged with the cover for this book. I’m really nervous, but I look forward to being able to do this interview with you.

--When did you all first start making illustrations?

Ichika: Since I could first remember. I don’t recall it all that clearly, but by the time I was in first year I was already drawing.

Suzunosuke: I think it was about middleschool. Apparently when I was a kid my parents were consulted by my teachers on the fact that I couldn’t actually draw pictures.

--You couldn’t draw pictures?

Suzunosuke: Even when I was made to stay behind by myself in kindergarten, the only things I drew were like little pictures of flowers on my drawing paper. It wasn’t that I was sick or anything like that, I was just a normal kid who couldn’t draw.

--I see, that’s very unexpected. What about you, You-san?

You: I don’t clearly remember when I first started drawing as a hobby, but my first picture was when I was three years old, and was a portrait of my caregiver in nursery. Back then I always wanted to use every color of crayon I had, and I guess the fact that I’m still always using rainbow colors even now just goes to show that what you learn in the cradle you carry to the grave.

Suzunosuke: I think that’s cool.

--Incidentally, when did you start making pictures related to VOCALOID?

Ichika: I think around 2007…maybe? I remember the first time I drew Miku was after listening to Yuuyu-P’s “White Season”.

Suzunosuke: I don’t remember how many years ago it was, but I feel like the first thing I drew was Kurousa-P’s “Cantarella”.

You: I listened to VOCALOID the first time in the winter of 2007, so I think it was probably around that time.

--So then, when was the first time you encountered AkunoP’s work?

Ichika: It was right after “Daughter of Evil” was posted on Piapro. I had just finished up making a PV, and when I was looking for new content on Piapro I got drawn in by the title and started listening to it.

Suzunosuke: The “Servant of Evil” was on NicoNico Douga’s rankings, and when I opened up the PV it had a tag saying to watch it after “Daughter of Evil”, so I watched them in order of “Daughter of Evil” and “Servant of Evil” for the first time.

You: Like Suzunosuke-san, probably in the autumn of 2008. The “Daughter of Evil” had a lot of buzz when it was first uploaded! I saw it in so many places with Ichika-san’s illustrations~ It feels so strange to see it having taken this form so many years later.

--Suzunosuke-san and You-san, this was the first time you’d seen a song that used Ichika-san’s illustrations, wasn’t it?

Ichika: I’m sorry for being alive…

Suzunosuke: Sorry, haha

You: Hey, hahaha

Ichika: I’m honestly really shaking here, haha

Suzunosuke: Maybe we should reply with “You’re a very wonderful person” ha ha.

-(Laughs) So what was everyone’s thoughts on the work when they saw “Daughter of Evil” and “Servant of Evil”?

Ichika: I think the imagery in it was really easy to get emotional about. I also thought it was a really interesting concept that although “Daughter of Evil” and “Servant of Evil” had a really different feel to them, they still felt like part of the same story.

Suzunosuke: All else aside I thought it was really sad, and I kept getting stuck on the fact that Allen couldn’t be saved. Still, it was because it was such a sad story that I was captivated by it. It also really made me feel the potential of the VOCALOID genre. It’s a derivative work, but also original content.

You: At the time I had thought it was really interesting and unusual to make a work with such dark fantasy elements using VOCALOID. I also really liked how catchy the tune was. It was also really impressive with all the derivative songs and fanart that got uploaded as things went on. I think it’s a work that shouldered a main pillar of the VOCALOID community in its heyday. And it’s really cool that it’s continuing to spread around the world even now.

--What image do you get of its creator, AkunoP?

Suzunosuke: Given he’s got “Akuno” (of evil) in his name, I thought he might be a scary person.

Ichika: Generally the people who do DTM have a kind of science-y image, so there’s that. And when we actually met, I remember he was a lot like that image. Though he was a bit thinner than I had imagined. Maybe if Akuno-san had shown up to our first meeting with his sunglasses look I’d answer that his image was different, haha.

You: Before I met him offline…He made a lot of romantic-type works, so I actually wondered if maybe he was a woman. When we actually met, it was apparently right after he’d changed his look, so I was a little amused to see him wearing a leather jacket and sunglasses.

--Have you all met AkunoP-san wearing sunglasses?

Suzunosuke: I actually just brushed him off because I didn’t know who he was for a second. As a fan the way he is now is probably close to his image as AkunoP, I would think.

Ichika: I also brushed him off.

You: Everybody brushed him off!

--Well that was an unexpected outcome, haha. Next, do you have a favorite AkunoP work?

Ichika: I actually really like “Clockwork Lullaby”. I prefer the quietly compelling melody and lyrics. Aside from that, I remember when I listened to “Daughter of Evil” I was really drawn to it, wondering what other kind of work he’d done, so that left a significant impression.

Suzunosuke: I think that might be “Re_Birthday”. The flow of sin and rebirth is so painfully beautiful, and I always get misty-eyed no matter how many times I listen to it.

You: Like Suzunosuke-san, I like “Re_Birthday”. I really love the music, and as for the story of it I think it’s really great it has that theme of salvation.

--I see. I had thought that Suzunosuke-san might say “Lunacy of Duke Venomania”, so that was surprising.

Suzunosuke: I could also say “Lunacy of Duke Venomania”, but I don’t want people to think I’m someone who likes erotic content, haha. But that’s also another song that I really like.

About the Novel Illustrations

--How did you feel when you heard about the “Daughter of Evil” becoming a novel?

Ichika: I was simply surprised.

Suzunosuke: I thought it was awesome.

You: I thought it was awesome for Akuno-san. I thought there must have been so many fan’s voices there, and that kind of invisible strength was deeply moving.

--Ichika-san, in the first book you did the cover illustration as well as the ones in the book itself—What was something that was hard about that?

Ichika: I’d have to say highlights.

--Highlights…! Certainly you had to do quite the interaction there… Honestly, was there any point where you were like, “I hope these editors step in dog crap”? haha

Ichika: Nah, ‘cause ever since I’ve become able to put in highlights more seriously, so I’d say it was good practice, haha.

--Suzunosuke-san, you were asked to do the cover for the second book; how was it when they approached you for that?

Suzunosuke: I had thought for sure that they were going to have me just do a pinup on the inside of the book, so then I was kind of like, “Now what?” The others who’ve been involved in it are such amazing illustrators, so I wondered if I’d be good enough for it.

--Was there anything you had trouble with?

Suzunosuke: Drawing the two of them to be just adorable was a little hard.

--I understand you had a bit of revision going on…?

Suzunosuke: Oh no, I saw that as being good training in a lot of ways, so even now it’s a good memory for me.

--You-san, you’ve been asked to do a lot of color illustrations each time, and in this guidebook you were entrusted with the cover illustration. How did you feel after finishing your work?

You: I really like doing the pinups, and I’ll generally paint them as I like, but I dealt with the cover with some different feelings in mind. As a fan I thought that Ichika-san would be given preference for sure. And I’ve refined on my composition a bit looking over past work. I wanted to emulate the flow of things up to now, so like Suzunosuke-san’s work I made it very horizontal.

--Who are some characters that were fun for you to draw in this novel series?

Ichika: All the characters are fun to draw, but if you’re gonna make me choose I’d say Elluka…I had this sense of security while drawing her, like it wasn’t an issue if I made her look a little bit like a villain.

Suzunosuke: I’ve only drawn two characters, so that would be the harmonius Clarith and Michaela. That pair so really cute, so I like them a lot.

--Suzunosuke-san, are there any characters that you would like to draw?

Suzunosuke: I love old man figures, so I’m a bit intrigued by Leonhart. Though I know that’s probably not what you were looking for, haha.

Ichika: (after half a second) It is!

Suzunosuke: Yay, haha

--You-san, you’ve probably drawn all of the main characters at this point; are there any that you’re fond of?

You: Everyone’s fun with how cute they are. I think Riliane-chan is really precious with how her hair is done up. And then there’s the princely Kyle-san—for some reason I’m always grinning when I draw him.

--Please tell us the impressions you were left with as the story has developed.

Ichika: I wasn’t expecting the romantic love between Michaela and Clarith, so that surprised me a bit.

Suzunosuke: I was actually really surprised that the base for Michaela and Gumillia’s appearances were those characters in those other songs.

You: I was also surprised at Michaela and Clarith. I felt the books complemented the content that wasn’t expanded on in the songs, which made them have a lot of interesting points. I think it’s also pretty great that I can now listen to the songs with a fresh perspective.

--Conclusively, how do you think the story will develop in the third book?

Ichika: I think Kyle’s mom is gonna be the final boss.

Suzunosuke: Hmm, I think all of the countries might get wrapped up in the fires of war. All the preliminary announcements have a pretty foreboding feeling to them.

You: All will go according to the will of god (AkunoP).

--Please let us know any final thoughts you have.

Ichika: Thanks for having me here. I don’t know yet how the third book is going to go, but I look forward to being able to go through the novels again with you.

Suzunosuke: I’d be really happy if I could be with you on the sidelines. This interview has been great!

You: I’m really happy to be linked to this series and involved in the work in this way. Thank you very much!

--Thank you very much for joining us everyone!

directory

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lena-in-a-red-dress · 4 years ago

Note

Yay! You're taking prompts! Could you do something with Lena going surfing with Alex and being nervous/hesitant to go near the water because of her memories of her mother's death and so Alex does her best to help/comfort her? P.S. You're awesome! And thank you so much!

Lena isn't in love with the beach-- it's too hot, too bright, and too idle-- but she loves to watch Alex surf. It's a rare moment in which Lena gets a true glimpse of the woman she married, untainted by the agent and director who so often predominates the rest of her life. This is when Lena gets to see the fierce determination, the cool intelligence, and the unbridled joy that is so innate in Alex, yet often tempered by the burdens of her job and the losses in her life.

So, no, Lena doesn't really enjoy the sand that gets into places where sand shouldn't be, or the sun pounding down from above, but she's content to sit and watch while her wife does her thing. Every so often, passersby will pause and watch as well, oohing and ahhing when Alex has a particularly good run.

They only manage to get out once a month or so, but that's enough for both of them. Or so Lena thought.

"Why don't you come on out with me?"

Lena blinks up from her novel-- a rare leisure since she became CEO-- unsure if its a question or an invitation.

"I'm okay here," Lena replies, but Alex doesn't let it go.

"No, I mean it. Why do you come if you don't like the water?"

Lena shrugs with a smile. "Because you like it."

Alex leans in to kiss Lena softly on the lips. "I'd like it more if you were out there with me."

Lena doesn't know how to surf, but her inability to say no when Alex looks at her like *that* has her strapping the tether of Alex's spare board to her ankle and gazing out across the water.

The sea is a sparkling blue, bright and shimmering in the sunlight. The swells beyond the break line are gentle-- that's where she intends to sit, legs astride the board now tucked under her arm. Now, just to get out there.

Lena is sure she looks a sight, carrying the surfboard into the crashing waves. She only climbs on-- and poorly at that-- when the water reaches her waist. From there, she looks to Alex, and copies her paddling towards the bigger waves.

She's able to coast over some, but soon comes upon a wave on the verge of breaking, looming tall and threatening over her head. In a split second, Lena registers Alex pushing her board under the water to duck beneath the water, and tries to follow. Too late.

Her grip on her surfboard slips as she pushes down-- the water forces it up and back, smacking her in the forehead just as the wave curls and sucks her down and over. Lena tumbles in the water, as though swallowed whole, and the entire weight of the ocean seems to come crashing down on her. All thought disappears except one: she's going to die.

Lena knows how to swim, but it's not a skill she's bothered to keep up. She reaches for the surface as though climbing, only to be pounded by another wave. Her surfboard smacks against her legs, tugging at her ankle. Water slips through her splayed fingers, hands like claws, and Lena's lungs start to burn.

In her panic, water slips up Lena's nose, burning even as she fights not to cough, to keep purchase on the dwindling air left in her lungs.

An arm cuts through the water and loops around her chest, hauling her to the surface. As soon as her head emerges Lena hacks and gags, bringing up bile and water.

"You're okay," Alex says in her ear. "I've got you."

When the water spits them onto shore, Lena starts to cry. She buries her face Alex's warm neck and sobs, still coughing. Laying there in the sand, as the waves pulse around her ankles, Lena cries in fear and shock, but also for the image that flashes across her mind's eye-- her mother, features open and full of sudden fear, the moment before she disappeared beneath the surface of that lake.

"I'm sorry," Alex tells her. "I'm sorry. You're okay. I promise."

Lena simply clutches her closer.

#quarantine prompt party 2.0 #lena surfing #angst at the beach #hope this fits the bill #hope you like it #agentcorp

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sambergscott · 5 years ago

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a peralta guarantee

“I promise I’ll come home safe, Ames. That’s a Peralta Guarantee.”

(missing scenes from 7x08 - amy worrying about jake)

hUge thanks to johanna for inspiring this fic and helping when i had a lil breakdown halfway through

When he approaches her desk mid-afternoon with a decaf coffee and the white chocolate chip cookies she’s been craving from the bakery across town, she knows he’s either a) broken something, b) wants something or c) has bad news. She narrows her eyes suspiciously, detecting an excited bounce in his step which can only mean it’s b and c; he wants something she’s not going to like.

“Hey, babe,” he tries to play it cool, clearing a butt-sized space on her desk on which to sit. “I come bearing gifts.”

“What do you want, Peralta?” She cuts to the chase.

“Damn it, you know me too well,” he mutters. “OK, so, here’s the thing: Doug Judy’s gettin’ married. He invited me to his Bachelor Party this weekend and I know he’s a criminal, Ames, but I really wanna go. Like, so bad. Would you be cool with that?”

She conjures up a mental pro and con list. On one hand, Doug Judy is The Pontiac Bandit, known felon, committer of God knows how many crimes, an overall bad dude. On the other, he’s Jake’s friend, singer of the smush songs CD in the glove box of their car that they always forget to take out, giver of the Le Creuset pot she adores. He’s always been nice to her and—.

“Sarge?” Gary interrupts her decision-making process with a quick question about a perp he just brought in, snapping her back to reality. She’s a Police Sergeant, her job is to serve and protect the city they call home and as much as she loves cooking her mom’s beef casserole recipe in Judy’s awesome wedding gift, she has a responsibility to bring him in.

“I’m sorry, babe. I just think it’s a bad idea.”

His face falls, his disappointment coming through loud and clear.

“What were you expecting me to say? Ignore the million arrest warrants out on this guy, many of them submitted by you, so you can drink beer and go to strip clubs?”

“You’re right,” he sighs. “You’re obviously right. Man, being good at your job sucks.”

She nods in agreement. “Remember last month when I had to shut that binder store down for running a secret drug dealing operation out back?”

“How could I forget? You cried for three days straight.”

“They had the best binder collection I’ve ever seen!”

(It was actually what was so fishy about it. In four trips to buy pregnancy binders, she hadn’t seen any of the founding members of the Brooklyn Binder Babes blog — Mary Sue, Catherine, Margaret or Jane — once. And there’s no way a stationery start-up would attract such long queues without their recommendation. It was a pretty easy solve from there).

“The point is, you can’t go to a criminal’s Bachelor Party.” She pats his hand. “You’ll just have to come maternity clothes shopping with me instead. None of my jeans fit me anymore.”

“As much as I would love to, you can take Kylie. I’m going to the party.”

“What?” She double-takes. “Jake, did you not listen to what I literally just said? We’re cops. We cannot be friends with criminals.”

“But we can be friends with informants who have helped us catch numerous, even bigger, more dangerous criminals,” he says with that look on his face, the one he gets when he finds a loophole that he can use to his advantage. She recognises it from home videos Karen has shown her where, instead of tidying his room like she asked him to, seven year old Jake shoves everything under his bed and carries on enacting a police chase with his race cars. “Captain Holt has given him immunity before, so technically I should be able to go party it up with him in Miami!”

“Wait... It’s in Miami? Miami... Florida?”

It’s a stupid question, she knows. Of course he means Miami, Florida. It’s just... they both promised on the flight home that they would never, ever go back there. After everything that happened with Figgis and not knowing if they’d ever see each other again, a statewide travel ban seemed a good way to put it all behind them, focus on all their future moments together, not on all the moments they missed.

“This isn’t like last time,” he reassures her. “It’s only for a weekend and then I’ll be coming straight home for snuggles with you and —,” he lowers his voice to a whisper because they haven’t told anyone she’s pregnant yet, “the baby.”

Her eyes fill with tears and she bites her lip so hard to stop them overflowing in front of all her uniformed officers. It’s pretty clear that he wants to go and she never wants to be one of them wives who control their husbands’ every move. All she wants is for him to be happy. And if going to Doug Judy’s Bachelor Party makes him happy, he should go, no matter how much she hates the entire state of Florida. She agrees, on one condition: “You have to text me hourly updates to let me know that you’re still alive.”

“Don’t I text you constantly anyway?”

“I guess so,” she sniffs.

He lifts her chin so she’s looking him in the eyes. “I promise I’ll come home safe, Ames. That’s a Peralta guarantee.”

“You better,” she warns, tears suddenly flowing down her face at the thought of him not coming home, not being there to watch Property Brothers with her, not raising their baby and proving to everyone what a great dad he will be.

Used to her extra strength pregnancy hormones shifting her emotions from 0 to 100 faster than John McClane can say “Yippie-Ki-Yay, motherfucker”, he pulls her into a tight hug, careful not to crush the precious cargo that is behind said mood swings.

He strokes her hair and whispers that he’ll be home before she knows it and that nothing, not even the worst state in the country, will tear him away from her.

When it’s time for him to leave, she follows him out to the street and, after a brief argument over the fact he packed his bag before he OK’ed the trip with her and another hormone-induced cry when his cab shows up, reluctantly waves goodbye.

True to his word, he texts her before the car is even out of sight. Miss you already 😘.

Her phone buzzes periodically throughout the rest of the day.

In a meeting with Holt and Terry: flying on mark cuban’s dope ass private plane!!!!! ✈️

Cooking dinner: florida is HOT (not as hot as u babe, dont worry)

Doing her crossword in bed: g’night ames, g’night baby, love u both SO MUCH

She smiles, tells him she loves him too and braces herself for the barrage of drunk texts and selfies coming her way.

Sleeping without him sucks. The bed is cold, her pregnancy pillow is not as good of a cuddle buddy and she tosses and turns all night worrying about him, where he is, what he’s doing, whether he’s safe.

Her eyes finally slip shut around 1 am when her phone buzzes. Again. And again. And again.

She tries to ignore him, bury her head under her pillow and go back to sleep, but the messages keep coming thick and fast. She groans, giving up and unlocking her phone.

There are 47 new messages from him.

Forty-seven.

Her initial annoyance at being woken up quickly disappears as she scrolls through the thread. He’s mostly sent her random, meaningless emojis and keysmashes, interspersed with the odd “I love you”, “you’re my best friend” and “I’m thinking about you” that warm her heart. He mentions something about their proposal, about crying with Doug Judy, which obviously makes her cry too.

(Dumb pregnancy hormones).

By the time she reaches the bottom, he’s sent her 10 more.

She decides for her sake — and the sake of all of her officers who would have to deal with a tired, emotional pregnant lady — to turn off her phone and reply to him in the morning.

She returns her phone to her nightstand, settles back into a comfortable position and closes her eyes.

She lies motionless for what feels like hours, unable to fall asleep. She tries the breathing technique her brother David brags about constantly, counting sheep like little Matthew, even reciting police codes like Teddy used to go to sleep after sex. Nothing works. She’s still awake.

She turns her phone back on to see what Jake’s up to now, only to see his messages ended abruptly with a caterpillar emoji over an hour ago.

She immediately panics, dialling 911 into her phone.

Her thumb hovers over the green call button.

She’s heard thousands of crazy operator call stories, frequently reminded the general population to only call in a genuine emergency and watched the YouTube compilations for fun. She deletes the number, positive that if she told an operator her husband was missing because she hadn’t heard from him while he’s at a Bachelor Party, she’s positive she would be added to those videos.

In an attempt to stop her spiral, she contemplates the possible scenarios in which his constant texts would cease.

Scenario 1: He’s living in the moment and has put his phone away (something she has been encouraging him to do lately to reduce his screen time)

Scenario 2: He’s very drunk and has completely forgotten about his promise

Scenario 3: He used up all his battery texting her and his phone has died

Scenario 4: He’s fallen asleep (although a quick check of Trudy Judy’s insta reveals the party is very much still in full flow)

Scenario 5: Judy’s criminal buddies have killed him and thrown his body into the ocean

Once the thought pops into her head, no amount of squeezing her eyes shut will make the image go away.

Holt giving an emotional eulogy about wearing ties and being an amazing detective/genius.

Some rookie taking over his desk.

The sympathetic looks when she tells all the other moms in baby group that her husband died.

Usually Jake is there to hold her when her nightmares get bad. She rolls over, expecting to see his kind eyes and soft smile, the untouched side of his bed only serving to make her cry harder.

She can’t lose him. Not yet. Not until they’re old and grey, and maybe not even then. She spent so long denying her feelings for her dorky partner, rueing every missed opportunity to be together, and when they finally, finally took the plunge, she had never been happier. She can’t lose him yet. They have so much more life left to live.

She can’t lose him because he promised her he would come home safe. He guaranteed it.

She clings onto the tiny grain of hope like one might cling onto a raft in the middle of the ocean.

He would never break a Peralta guarantee.

Her phone finally buzzes again an hour later.

From: Unknown

Ames, it’s me, Jake. Judy’s buddies found out I’m a cop + destroyed my phone. So sorry I couldn’t text before. Hope you didn’t worry too much, although I know you probably haven’t slept. You can stop worrying now. I’m safe. Love you + see you tomorrow.

Love you too, she responds, yawning as she places the phone back on the side table.

Relieved that he’s OK, and exhausted from all the worrying, she falls into the easiest sleep she’s ever had.

Before she knows it, it’s the next afternoon, Jake’s keys are turning in the lock, he’s dropping his holdall on the floor and rushing to her side to kiss her all over her face.

“I missed you too,” she laughs, kissing him properly.

“Sorry it took so long — Doug and Trudy made me fly commercial —.”

“Don’t worry about it. You’re home now. That’s all that matters.”

“I’m never leaving you two again,” he swears.

“You’ll have to leave us eventually to go to the bathroom and stuff,” she points out, raking her fingers through the unruly curls that she so hopes their baby will inherit. “Just don’t go back there.”

A solemn understanding passes over his face and he nods. “Never again. Not even if our kid wants to go to Disney World. We’ll take them to the California one instead.”

“Smort,” she says, stealing his line and in an instant, that familiar grin is back.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

A dozen memories flood back, of oldies in short shorts and shuffleboard and Doug Judy getting away again. Of noice and smort and saying “I love you” for the very first time. Her eyes fill with tears — dumb pregnancy hormones strike again — as she buries her face in his shoulder.

“Let’s go to bed,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to the top of her head and lifting her bridal style to carry her to their room. He places her carefully onto the mattress and flops down next to her.

She snuggles into him, eyes closing once more. “Did we even get an invite to the wedding?”

“Not even close,” he sighs.

“Damn it. I would’ve loved to see that trainwreck.”

“You and me both, babe. You and me both.”

#b99 fic #jake x amy #my writing #it's taken me 2 full days to write this lemme know what you think

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musical-shit-show · 4 years ago

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Two Sides: Chapter 2

Previous Chapter: (1)

Characters: Musical!Beetlejuice, Female!OC, Lydia Deetz, Barbara Maitland, Adam Maitland

Warnings: swearing, anxiety/mild panic attack, supernatural stuff, strange dreams (?)

Word Count: 1432

Author’s Note: Okay I’m not sure if anyone is reading this, but sorry about the wait on Chapter 2! I have been swamped with work this past week and don’t have a lot of time to edit chapters without my roommate getting sus. Plus ya girl stares at a laptop from 9 to 5 every day (yay pandemic) so it takes a toll on my eyes.

Anyways, this is basically another set up chapter, but it does get a little wild as the two girls show up to the Deetz/Maitland house. If you like this story so far, please like and/or reblog! Also if you have any words of wisdom for writing or just wanna chat, my ask box is open! I mentioned that I would be doing asks and putting up a prompt list, and I’ll hopefully get around to doing that this weekend, I’m just a procrastinator.

Okay I’ll stop rambling. Here’s Chapter 2!

Chapter 2

Cassandra was awoken from her hazy slumber with a jolt of a car brake. “We’re here!” Lydia exclaimed gleefully, dropping her usual mellow persona.

Cassandra blinked purposefully, strange images from a dream flashing in her vision. Stripes, vibrant green, a snakelike creature…the pictures in her mind made her feel uneasy, but she brushed them aside as she unloaded her small duffle bag from the backseat of Lydia’s car.

The house looked normal enough. Large, white and Victorian-era, it sat atop a comically round hill, looking picturesque against the rural landscape. Lydia bolted in front of her roommate, the small black suitcase she had brought rattling against the gravel driveway. Cassandra giggled to herself. She hadn’t seen Lydia this excited in a long while. As the girls made their way up the steep hill, movement on the second floor caught Cassandra’s eye. No figure was visible, but the brown-haired girl did notice the flutter of the white drapes that framed the window as they inched closer to the house. Cassandra stared up for a few more seconds before shaking her head following Lydia up the rest of the driveway.

“I can’t wait for you to meet them!” she called, Cassandra several steps behind her. Lydia’s father, Charles, and stepmother, Delia, would not be keeping the girls’ company on this particular visit. Charles was a real-estate mogul, and Delia was a life coach giving motivational speeches across the country. The only people in the house this weekend were Lydia’s aunt and uncle, both of whom Cassandra knew nothing about.

Despite her unusual dream, Cassandra tried to match Lydia’s enthusiasm. “Yeah, from what you’ve told me about them, they sound awesome!” The girls reached the door, and for a brief moment, Lydia hesitated, her hand stiff on the doorknob. Cassandra furrowed her brow slightly.

Though Lydia had been excited about finally introducing Cassandra to her ‘aunt and uncle’, she had grown more uneasy the closer they got to the house. What if she had a total meltdown? Sure, Cassandra had a passive interest in the supernatural, but not to the level Lydia had when she was younger; her roommate was far more normal, which could lead to a bit of scene when she found out the truth.

“Cassie, there’s something I need to tell you before you meet Adam and Babs,” Lydia started, “They’re well…they’re different. But you need to promise that you won’t be mad at me or freak out.” Cassandra grew worried at Lydia’s words, her heartbeat increasing rapidly as a small panic set in. How could they possibly be weird by Lydia’s standards? Were they nudists? Swingers? Republicans?

“Lyds, don’t worry,” Cassandra replied, doing her best to ease herself and her best friend, “I’m sure whatever it is, I’ll be fine. They’re your family and I want to get to know them.” With a knowing shrug, Lydia opened the creaky front door. She had a feeling this wasn’t going to end well, but it was time to let the chips fall where they may.

Lydia wanted to tell Cassandra before this point, she really did. But how do you casually mention to your roommate that you used to live with two ghosts? Lydia wasn’t very trusting with people, especially when it came to Adam and Barbara. She had grown to love Cassandra like a sister, but the longer she waited, the more awkward it would’ve become to explain. By Lydia’s twisted logic, it was best to just show her best friend the craziness she was getting herself into.

“Babs! Adam!” Lydia called, straightening her suitcase to face upright, “I’m home!” Cassandra felt a chill wrack through her entire body, though there wasn’t a single gust of wind coming from outside of the house. Suddenly, two figures appeared out of thin air. Cassandra’s blood turned ice cold. ‘Did they just fucking materialize out of nowhere?’ she thought, feeling a bead of sweat forming on her brow, ‘Am I losing my goddamn mind?’

The couple that stood before them looked ordinary enough, apart from the fact that they clearly possessed some kind of supernatural powers. Barbara was blonde, doe-eyed and was grinning ear-to-ear. Her husband, Adam, only stood a few inches higher than her, and had square-framed glasses perched atop his light brown hair. They greeted Lydia with excited squeals, enveloping her in a warm, three-person hug. They looked like they’d fit perfectly on the cover of Country Living magazine or in line at a Trader Joe’s checkout.

Cassandra was gripping the strap of her duffle bag tightly, a wave of nausea and confusion crashing over her. Her brain was firing rapidly as she attempted to sus out how these two seemingly normal people just magically appeared.

“Oh Lydia, we’re so glad to see you!” Adam said, the timbre of his voice warm and slightly nasally. He wrapped the smaller girl in a bear hug, lifting her a few inches off of the ground. Though Lydia was preoccupied trying to gauge Cassandra’s reaction, she embraced Adam, smiling slightly.

“It’s been way too long,” Barbara added as Adam deposited Lydia back onto the floor. Barbara turned to finally notice Cassandra, who was seconds away from a panic attack. The older woman, completely oblivious, beamed at the other girl, “Oh, and this must be your roommate!” She went in for a hug, but stopped in her tracks when she saw Cassandra’s strained expression.

“Lydia, what’s going on?” she said quietly, “Does your family typically….uh, teleport from one place to another?” Barbara and Adam looked at each other, confused expressions painted across their faces.

“I knew this would happen,” Lydia said under her breath, cursing herself for not telling her roommate sooner. She collected herself, running a hand through her short black bob, “Okay, Cassie…Barbara and Adam aren’t my aunt and uncle. They lived in this house before my dad and I moved in when I was in high school. They, well, they died here. They’re ghosts, technically speaking.” Adam and Barbara shifted uncomfortably.

The supernatural was not a subject that was completely foreign to Cassandra. She had always had a slight interest in the macabre, she just had no idea that her best friend and roommate’s life was intertwined with ghosts. Actual ghosts.

“You didn’t tell her?!” Adam said, bewildered. He folded his arms across his chest, clearly disappointed in Lydia. Barbara touched his shoulder, trying to ease her husband’s frustration.

“She wouldn’t have believed me!” Lydia defended, “I had to show her for myself.” Lydia and Adam bickered back and forth before all three turned to Cassandra, who hadn’t spoken a word in a few minutes. Finally, she collected herself, the others waiting with baited breath at her response to all of the madness.

“I’m not angry,” she stated plainly, doing her best to steady her breathing, “This is actually, uh, really fucking cool.” Lydia’s eyes brightened at her roommate’s words. She knew if anyone would understand her and her family, it was Cassie. “But,” she continued, “I need time to process the whole ‘ghosts are real and are also best friends with my roommate’ thing. So, is it alright if I go upstairs and we can talk more about this later?”

“Of course,” Adam replied apologetically, “We’re sorry. Had Lydia told us—” he shot a glare at her, “—that you didn’t know we were, uh, dead, we would’ve tried to appear more…normal.”

“It’s, it’s fine,” Cassandra said, wiping the sweat from her hands nervously on her jeans, “Lydia’s right, I was gonna find out eventually. Why not rip the Band-Aid off, huh?” Barbara smiled. She and Adam were quickly taking a liking to Cassie. She was funny and understanding, especially considering the circumstances. Cassie climbed the steps, her suitcase bumping into the back of her legs.

Lydia smiled at the Maitlands as Cassandra disappeared to the second floor. “I’m sorry, I tried to think of a plan and I should’ve called and—” Barbara shushed the young woman, placing a hand lovingly on her shoulder.

“We understand,” Barbara said knowingly, “But, Lydia, did you tell her about…you know…? Lydia furrowed her brow and let out a frustrated sigh. She knew this conversation would be coming her way. She knew he would come up eventually.

“No, and I don’t intend to,” Lydia stated firmly, “He should be far away from this house, at least for this weekend. We just need to make it three days, and then I’ll tell Cass. I promise.”

‘Oh, Lyds’ Beetlejuice thought, grinning as he hid in a dark corner of the house, ‘I love it when you’re wrong.’

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Ooooh it’s finally bug man time!!! Hope you enjoyed this chapter (if anyone is reading lol). Like and reblog if you can! Thanks :)

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momtemplative · 5 years ago

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Summertime.

Summertime is fucking awesome for a kid.

I remember entire days—chunks of days— that were spent at the pool, with Will Smith’s SummaSummaSummaTime bumping through the loud speakers while we ate nachos with fake cheese for lunch with our wrinkly, chlorine-sodden fingers. For months, everything smelled with a hint of chlorine and freedom. Open expanses of time were glorious.

Then I had kids.

With kids and summer, there is a lot to consider, a grand choreography to uphold. I always lose sleep before summer. It feels as if my role jumps from “parent” to “coordinator of peace and good times for three straight months,” (even typing all that was exhausting), where everyone is entertained, but not too entertained, happy, but not overly happy, everyone has a routine, but plenty of time for spontaneity, and so on! YAY!

Like all grand puppet-masters, I feel deeply anxious before the show even begins. Damn you, summer!

Summer is just the right length where we can get through it, at times gliding through mercifully, at times, hanging on to all the tow-ropes and oh-shit handles we can find along the way. The number of kid meltdowns and sibling fista-cuffs greatly increases as we near the finish line. The phrase, “We’ll try and get you some space,” is utilized daily. Then, when school starts again, we all heave a sigh of relief that is audible for blocks.

I wasn’t fully aware of the amount of time and energy that went to keeping the machine-of-summer afloat. Until COVID and our involuntary exposure therapy. We were thrust into “summer” two-and-a-half months early, without warning and without any external supports. It felt like some bizarre test in endurance. Like our human capacity for resilience was being evaluated for future generations. There was no more just getting through. We were thrown in way too deep for that. We had to figure out how to function, how to grow and maintain sanity because, for this version of summer, there really is no finish line.

After the first two COVID-weeks of being at home with the kids, no work or school (or online school at that point), no activities or playdates, no outside world to depend on, I fell apart. As in, to pieces—the way one does when they are trying to hold everything together. The uptick in fights, tantrums and explosive emotions, with no end in sight, was too much to process.

After a few hours of wallowing, I picked myself up and pulled down a pile of books from the shelf that have added perspective in the past—Siblings without Rivalry, The Wisdom of No Escape, Care of the Soul. The words were nice, but nothing cut through the wall of despondency. So I pulled out my phone and searched “Siblings Fighting” on my Janet Lansbury podcast, smearing tears as I went.

(A note here on Janet Lansbury. As a parent of young kids, no one person has benefited my faculties, mental health and wit more than Janet. Her podcast is rich with real-life wisdom that changes the experience of parenthood for the better.)

In the random sibling-titled podcast that I discovered—from years ago, but still, obviously, totally current—Janet was replying to a woman who had three young kids and was losing her mind trying to maintain tranquility in her house. The woman said something to the effect of, it would have been so much easier if I’d only had one.

To this, Janet replied with what felt, to me, like a beautiful and classic snap-out-of-it moment. She said, No. I disagree. Followed by something to the order of this: When you have one child, you can still live under the illusion that you can keep everyone happy. When you have two kids, you start to see that it’s really tough, damn near impossible, to keep everyone happy and peaceful, but you may still try. With three kids, you have the gift of experiencing first hand that the jig is up! No matter what kind of tiny-statue-winning show you maintain, there is no way in hell you can keep three young kids peaceful all the time. So you are forced to stop trying.

I came to the conclusion that COVID is my third child.

And with that thought—like the scene in Mary Poppins where the messy room gets magically tidied as if from an internal intelligence all its own—my insides were completely fresh, organized, and updated. My energy quadrupled.

With the externals turned down, with nowhere to go, and all of us cohabiting the same tiny shoebox of a house, it’s not going to be business-as-usual for quite some time. And we’ll all fare better with adjusted expectations. We are all in a fishbowl and, while clocking in endless hours together, I saw right-quick the laundry lists of things I feigned having control of: my girls and their interactions, potty training for Ruth, the weather (which rules if we can or cannot get outside), my mood, Jesse’s mood.

Janet says, wake up expecting turmoil—then you won't make it your job to live free of it, get rid of it, fix it, numb it. Discord is healthy. Emotions are healthier. Don’t dive in and ride the waves with your kids, stand back and watch, give them space, be there for them to come back to shore. The last thing they need is a mom who is also out of breath, scraped up and with sand in her ears. I don’t need to be Queen Empress of their journey as siblings. I don’t need to have a say in every nuance, every detail and pixel of this habitat.

And, she says, give yourself permission to flounder, too. Always, but especially right now. Some moments just feel brutally claustrophobic—we can be ready for that. A few days ago, I started crying while Jesse was giving me a shoulder massage. No warning, just did. I had a major-headache and I couldn’t think straight. Opal said, “Mom, are you crying?” SO defensive, I said, “I feel like I’m under a magnifying glass!” and ran out of the room. And sometimes it just goes like that. (I apologized to Opal soon thereafter.) If my emotions are coming out sideways like this—at 42 and with thousands of dollars under my belt spent on therapy—imagine what our sweet kiddos are going through!

And sometimes things settle organically into their rightful place, without force or manipulation. Today, I was lying on the floor in the hallway—not an unusual sight in the middle of the day for me to have my legs up a wall for a short period of time. This time, Ruth was in the bathroom in the tub, the door open to my right. She was acting out a full drama with her Elsa and Anna barbies. Opal was behind her bedroom door, which was closed, reachable by raising my right arm. She was doing her singing lessons over Skype, crooning her gorgeous little heart out. Jesse was behind door number three, our closed bedroom door, easily reached by my left hand. He was talking on the phone in hushed tones to who-knows-who. Three completely separate worlds were happening peacefully, simultaneously, all within my arm’s reach. It was a tiny little subculture, and I was in the middle, observant and spacious, not expending even the slightest molecule of energy.

If anything, I was bolstered as a part of this whole, the Grimes system, my family. And there were a few cherished minutes to get lost inside of that settled feeling, which is becoming less and less rare, before Ruth hollered that she needed to pee and I snapped back to attention.

So here we are, nearing the end of the first official week of summer. No public pool or Will Smith or finger-paint-yellow nacho cheese. I can’t quite fathom a summer without any of the norms—camps and playdates and travel. For now, no public places, parks, or our blessed little library.

Things are starting to slowly open again, though I suppose they have been for weeks now. We have taken two magnificent walks with our close friends—socially distanced and masked. It’s still strange, but a step forward, no doubt. Cultivating moments of connection like these, situations hinged in community—even if virtual—are key in maintaining some sense of equanimity as time moves forward.

(PS: This is utterly different from the work of the puppet-master.)

Though time feels anything but linear. I flash-forward to the image of my daughters ten, twenty, years from now, reminiscing about the COVID era with their friends. (Six feet apart on walks, remember? The masks, OMG, the MASKS!) I think back to when I was a kid and scour the already-murky memories for some example of a comparable viewpoint, something I can offer to my girls, tell them I had been through something similar when I was their age. But I come up with nothing, nada.

We are all writing this story as we go.

May 27, 2020

#momtemplative #mindfulparenting #COVIDwords #summertime

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screamingatanemptyroom · 6 years ago

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Restricted Magic Arc 3 Part 6

I finally had a moment to write! Yay! This part is a little short, but I’m hopeful i can continue it later this weekend, enjoy!

Master post link to the rest of the parts.

It wasn’t a fight. It was a one sided beatdown.

Small hands struck his chest, pushing him to the floor. The boy was young, but he was smaller, and his five-year-old frame couldn’t hold up against the larger boy’s strength. He curled up in a ball, protecting his head and his stomach as the other child kicked him over and over. A group of children surrounded the fighting pair, but no one stepped forward to help him.

“Monster!” One girl shouted with a cruel grin.

“Leech!”

“They should have drowned you when you were born!”

He tried to hold on, but the boy lands a kick to his head, causing his ears to ring. Blood ran from a cut in his forehead to his eyes, dying his vision red.

Enough.

He reaches out, grabbing the ankle of his assailant. The boy, startled, tried to pull it back but it was already to late.

His hand was on him.

The larger boy crumpled to the ground, unconscious. The remainder of the children stepped back, startled as he ignored his injuries and stood up, smiling, the coppery taste of blood in his mouth.

“You were right.”

The other children were screaming, running away in the face of his power.

“I am a monster.”

He was all-alone. Sitting at the edge of the temple steps, he put his face in his hands, and sobbed bitterly.

“What’s wrong?” A young woman, sixteen or seventeen years old, sat next to him, a soft comforting hand on his back.

He briefly explained what happened, hesitating to tell her the extent to which he hurt the other children. When he had finished he looked up into her eyes, his face sad.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have been born. They say I’m a monster, and I think they’re right.” He rubbed his tears away with the back of his hand, but his eyes immediately filled up again.

The woman didn’t flinch.

“You are what you decide to be. If you decide to be a monster, then that’s all you’ll ever be. But you don’t have to be.” She gave him a quick hug. “You could be a hero if you wanted.”

He pouted. “Easy for you to say, you were chosen to help my father with the Renewal. He likes you.”

“That may be so, but he loves you, so I don’t think you have to worry.” She chuckled quietly as he rolled his eyes.

Looking out at the ground, where his blood and tears had soaked into the ground he sighed. “I hate my power. I wish I could be like you.”

“Everyone has a purpose. You don’t need mine, you already have your own.” The young woman shook her head. “Keep searching for it. And until then, if they come to bother you, try to make you cry, show them a smile instead, even if it’s a fake one.” Placing a finger under his small chin she smiled brightly. “Just like this. Let me see it.”

He smiled, and if it was a little strained, neither of them mentioned it.

“Good job Christopher, I knew you could do it! Now why don’t you come inside, I made some cake, my sister’s coming today!”

Christopher jumped up to his feet, excited. “Elsinore is coming?! That’s great!” He ran towards the temple, before pausing, a genuine smile lighting up his face. “Thanks, Sophia.”

Christopher woke up in a dark room, his face wet from tears.

Taking a moment to stabilize his breathing, he hid his face with his arm, giving out a quiet groan.

“What a worthless dream.”

He knew why those memories were suddenly bothering him again. The encounter with that boy in the woods. The one who was in love with Erin. It had been a miscalculation on Christopher’s part not to find out that there was someone who had catastrophic level Insight before coming in to contact with him.

Standing up, he looked in a mirror. He smiled lightly, the false expression naturally appearing on his face.

Years of lying, pretending. Of being used by others.

He wondered if this was what Sophia had envisioned when she told him to find his purpose.

Of course what did she know. For all her beautiful words she never even got to complete the Renewal. She ended up married to a general and murdered in a foreign country instead.

Now the only hope in the world rested on him bringing her daughter home.

The Christopher in the mirror looked frowned. For all that Erin looked like her mother, she was nothing like her. The easygoing temperament, the friendly atmosphere… none of it had been passed on to her daughter. She was cold, her eyes seeming to study him as if deciding whether or not to kill him. It made him uncomfortable. She didn’t remind him of Sophia, she was a lot more like her father.

But she was the only one who could save everyone.

If only it could have been him…

CRASH!

His fist smashed into the mirror, breaking the smiling image in front of him.

He was not anyone’s savior. He was a tool. A monster.

That was his purpose.

He would bring Erin back to Merion. Or he would die trying.

“Turn your papers over, students. The exam is over.”

A mixed chorus of cheers and groans met the teacher’s statement. Erin had already turned her paper over a while ago, and had been waiting quietly for the test time to be over. She gave a small grin as she stretched in her chair. Nothing in the exam had come as a surprise, and she felt that her position as top student in the theoretical portion wouldn’t be threatened in the near future.

A loud, pained groan broke Erin out of her thoughts. She looked over with an amused expression.

“Still alive, Gerald?”

The young man in question had his face down on the desk. “Barely.”

She patted him on the shoulder. “I’m sure you did fine.”

Gerald’s head snapped up, his face lighting up with enthusiasm. “Just remember your promise!” Erin winced. “Yes.”

Her unenthusiastic reply seemed to worry him. “You said if I passed, you would go to the yearly Formal with me!”

“Yes. IF you passed.”

Getting a more positive answer, Gerald pumped his fist and cheered. “Super romantic date time! Awesome!” He and Olivia high fived.

“You don’t have to be that excited.”

He shrugged. “Yes I do.”

Sighing, Erin looked over at Olivia. “And why are YOU so enthusiastic about this?”

“First of all, as a supportive best friend, I cheer on all your positive life experiences.” She grinned, “Besides, more importantly, if you go, I get to pick out your dress.”

“Who decided that?”

Her face had a rare look of stubbornness. “You never had a choice.”

Looking out the window, Erin buried her face in her hands and sighed.

At least she would only have to go if Gerald passed the exam.

“I passed the exam!”

Several days later, Erin was met with an ecstatic Gerald and Olivia. Faced with their overwhelming enthusiasm, she could only nod her head, and leave them to their planning

As the night of the ball came closer, the group prepared for their trip to Merion. The “classes” with Christopher continued, with very little success. Despite his best efforts, the only person who ever appeared to pay attention was Gerald. Frederick and Olivia continued with their artwork, making a full-fledged comic series of Erin murdering Christopher in various painful and increasingly gruesome ways. Matthias slept through each class, attacking instantly with ice magic any time someone was foolish enough to wake him up.

As for Erin…

It was difficult for anyone but her to know whether she was there or an illusion. Both ignored everyone, quietly reading during the lecture, and left without a word. The group as a whole had actually assumed she never attended these classes, but on the week before the Formal, Gerald showed up with a drawing to add to the comic.

“See this is me and Erin getting married, and here are all our babies!” Gerald grinned proudly, handing the paper to Frederick who studied it closely before smirking.

“Why do the kids look like Matthias?”

“WHAT? No they don’t!” Gerald tried to grab the paper back, but it was held out his reach by a laughing Frederick.”

“They’re pale with white hair…”

“It was drawn with black and white!”

“I think Erin’s cheating on you.”

“NOOO!”

WHOOSH.

The paper in Frederick’s hand burst into flames. Startled, the group turned towards Erin, who they had thought to be an illusion.

“That’s enough.” Her voice was quiet, but no one dared to contradict her.

“Yep.”

“Yes.”

“Sorry.”

“Guys!” Christopher broke in with a loud sigh. “You realize I was still in the middle of a lecture, right?”

Frederick turned to him with a confused expression. “Sorry, who were you again?”

Christopher then tried to talk to Erin, but she had already switched out with an illusion and escaped.

The day before the ball, Erin was walking to the forest to practice, mentally exhausted from all the last-minute fitting that Olivia had put her through. The girl was normally laid back and cheerful, but once it involved something she was passionate about, she was an absolute tyrant. Erin stretched, wincing as her stiff muscles protested the movement.

“ERIN! I was looking for you!” A young man with golden hair and eyes walked up, a friendly, casual grin on his face. Seeing Christopher approach. Erin ignored him, continuing on her way towards the forest.

“You can’t ignore me forever.” He trotted after her, slightly out of breath following the pace that she had set.

“…” Erin looked ahead, refusing to answer.

“Fine.” Christopher huffed with annoyance. “You listen, I’ll talk. I know you don’t agree with this engagement, but this goes much deeper than just you or me. It’s fine if you want to keep your own personal life.” He shrugged. “Love is a fantasy anyways. People use each other, and when they aren’t useful anymore they are cast aside. I don’t know what you and that boy think you have, but once you no longer need each other it will fade soon enough.”

“…”

“So don’t ruin engagement that has far-reaching political consequences just for a simple infatuation.”

“…”

Christopher threw up his hands. “Why are you so difficult?! Look, this may be difficult to believe, but the fate of everyone, the world, depends on this.”

Erin finally stopped, and turned to Christopher with a cold smile.

“’Fate of the world?’” She snorted derisively. “A convenient phrase that sounds great, but at the end of the day is used by people like you to get what you want.”

“I don’t expect you to understand…”

“I understand enough.”

“FINE!” He turned away. “We leave in a week. In Merion, people will be choosing sides. I suggest you choose the right one.”

Erin watched him walk away, the restriction amulet in her fist digging deeply into her skin.

It was the night of the ball. Erin stared at the mirror, feeling slightly uncomfortable.

“Are you sure…?” She trailed off at Olivia’s indignant expression.

“AM I SURE?!” She gestured at the reflection in the mirror, which showed a floor length dark red dress. “LOOK AT YOU! You look amazing! The cut is perfect, if I do say so myself.” She chuckled. “Gerald is going to freak out.”

“You look pretty good yourself.” Erin had to smile at the other girl’s enthusiasm.

Olivia held out her arms, twirling in a circle. “Do you like it?!” Her dress was wildly different from Erin’s, a light blue ball gown covered in lace.

“It’s perfect for you.”

“I know.”

The girls hugged each other briefly, and then parted as Erin glanced down at the amulet around her neck.

“Gerald is here.”

“Only Gerald would hand his fiancé a tracker that would let them find him at any time.” Olivia grabbed Erin’s arm, dragging her towards the door. “Let’s go!”

Erin dragged her feet a little, but allowed herself to be pulled out of the room.

It was time to go to a ball.

#writing #Erin/Gerald #part 6 #fantasy #magic #sorry this was short #Ball will make up for it #gerald gets to be a badass #then off to merion to get to the bottom of everything.#yay #i missed writing #especially writing this series #hopefully things get less crazy so i can keep writing this story more frequently

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scifrey · 6 years ago

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My Very Spoilery Endgame Review - What I Liked, What Annoyed Me, and Two Questions I Am Left With

I was very satisfied and enjoyed it very much. The theater burst into applause in several instances and it was great to celebrate the end of an era with fellow fans.

Now for the spoilery critiques and praise.

My favorite moments were:

Thor reconciling his self-image and self-worth with his mother

“I’m still worthy.”

Loki escaping and (hopefully) living in at least one timeline - because if Steve went back to “trim the branches” then this means he returned the Tesseract to 1970. Which means the branch where Loki snagged the Tesseract and was not imprisoned on Asgard may have endured*.

Ken Jeong’s cameo.

Stan Lee’s cameo.

Banner coming to terms with who and what he is and living comfortably with the Hulk.

Basically everyone really leaning into the self-love and self-value by the end of the film.

“That is America’s Ass”.

“I could do this all day.” “Yeah, I know.”

“How can I? You’re taking all the stupid with you.”

“Ha! I knew it!”

“I am Iron Man.”

Scott finding Cassie alive.

Wong’s exasperated reply to Strange’s “Is that everyone?”

Nebula’s redemption. This is a princess (as Squidward calls Thanos “sire”) who saves her own damn self.

How the thing that gave the game away to Thanos was actually really clever and well executed; this wasn’t a “heroes are just stupid this one time” (like how Quill screwed the pooch in Infinity War when they had the damn glove). It was something that I genuinely hadn’t thought of, and I assume no one, not even Nebula, would have thought of. It worked. And it worked well.

All the ladies supporting Carol in the final battle - which was awesome but also felt a bit like the moment was added only so the Russos could check it off a “don’t piss off the feminists” list.

How the final battle set it up well for the next phase - I liked how the Glove Relay was from an OG Avenger (Hawkeye) to the new Avengers - Black Panther, Spider-man, and Captain Marvel.

“I love you 3000″.

Falcon!Cap - finally! Yay!

The sound of the armor that started it all being forged as the endcap of the credits.

However.

I wish Bucky and Steve had also had a meaningful moment at the end, like Steve and Sam, something that made it clear that even though Steve was older now, he was no less Bucky’s best pal.

I'm very, very annoyed that they Fridged Natasha. I mean, I get it. Someone had to die. And we all knew Hawkeye was going to go back to his family, so it wouldn’t be him. And I do love how they did the death, how Nat and Clint fought with one another to the be the one to make the sacrifice. And her death would have been especially cheap if Bruce had just Snapped her Back. I get it.

And if there wasn’t a long history of Fridging female character to ensure the male ones have enough Man-Pain to have a character arc and impetus to be a hero, then you know what? This would have been a really moving sacrifice. It would have really worked.

But there is. And in light of that, it’s left me... itchy. Uncomfortable. Because in the context of the film alone it was a great death. But in the context of the history of comic book narratives, it sucked.

Also, what does this mean for the Black Widow movie? Will it actually be a prequel? Will it be Budapest? And if it is Budapest, will they use the same actors, or cast new, younger ones?

I also don't understand the narrative reason why they had to make so many fat jokes around Thor.

I mean, yeah, it makes sense he was depressed and stopped taking care of his heath, and self-medicated with booze and food. This was a strong and meaningful narrative and I really liked that he was given the opportunity to mourn, to question his purpose, to become more than just muscles and a hammer in terms of character construction. That he could grieve and struggle, and be filled with crippling regret that kept him indoors and hiding, and filled self-loathing.

As a character choice it made sense. And I liked that he was still a powerful warrior while chubby, and that he didn’t magically become slim again when he suited up. It was wonderful to see him be no less powerful, dangerous, dedicated, and no less kick ass while sporting a keg instead of a sixpack.

But they leaned awfully hard on that “fat joke” button and by the time Rhodey said “Cheez Whiz?” I was over it. Its got tedious and frankly a bit insulting.

Teasing someone for suffering because he lost literally everyone he loved is not cool. The jokes fell flat, for good reason. They were cruel.

And when the Russos announced that they had included the MCU's first openly gay character I was hoping that it would be a main character, not some rando dude in a talk therapy meeting. I wanted Bucky and Sam to confess feelings, or Bucky to Steve even if Steve couldn’t return them, or Valkyrie to at least have a wife in New Asgard, or something.

But TBH it didn't surprise me that they made it some nameless dude in group support. Like J.K. Rowling, the Russos are happy to queerbait but too cowardly to commit, and they always have been. I’d be annoyed but it’s not worth the energy.

At least when the guy mentioned his boyfriend it was a “no big deal” mention, and nobody made a “are you cool with this, Cap?” thing to really point out that ooooo, this dude is queer.

But those are my only gripes. The rest of it was thoroughly enjoyable and satisfying.

Especially all the little call backs. The "I am Iron Man" and “I could do this all day” stuff - it felt like little gifts to the fandom.

However, I have two questions.

1) When people were Snapped Back, were they Snapped to their previous exact geographical location? Because if so, what about people who had been in transit? Did people who were Snapped Away while in a plane just... appear mid-sky and plummet to their deaths? Were people on spaceships Snapped Back into the void of cold space? We saw in Infinity War that helicopters crashed into city streets - the pilot, that means, was Snapped Away. When that pilot came back, where did he come back? Did Bruce think to Snap them all into safe places? (I mean, I assume the Stones accounted for Spacial Drift and the location of planets in orbit... maybe it accounted for people who would have Snapped Back into deadly situations?)

2) I do love that Steve and Peggy got their life together At that point Pegs would have been like... at least 10 years older than Steve? Maybe 15? What would her neighbors think of Sugar Momma Peggy Carter and her Very Much Younger (Looking) Husband?

Did she introduce him to anyone? Did they have neighborhood BBQs? At that point everyone would have known who Captain America/Steve Rogers was so did no one recognize him? What did they say? (Did we get Beardy Steve back???) They had kids, canonically, so was Steve able to attend their T-BAll games and school plays?

One assumes that Sugar Baby Steve would have been the House Husband, because Pegs was running Shield and Steve was out of the game. He’d never be able to show his face at SHIELD because Howard would recognize him, and so would Arnim Zola, so HYDRA would have known that Captain America survived and I imagine they would have given anything to get him into the Chair.

It makes me think that Sugar Baby House Husband Steve would have been very isolated and possibly lonely. Maybe he had a few neighbor friends, but can you image how torturous it must have been to live so privately? To know that Bucky was out there suffering and being tortured and brainwashed and that he couldn’t do anything about it? He couldn’t go save his best pal?

That Peggy could never bring him to the SHIELD Christmas party, to visit her new baby godson Anthony, never attend anything with him.

And it makes me think Steve had to vanish from her life right when his earlier self entered it so like... as soon as she started getting sick enough with Alzheimer's he had to leave.

Because that’s when younger Steve came into her life, and started visiting her in the nursing home.

But he had to abandon her when she needed him most, and that is very tragic. How did Steve reconcile that with himself? Especially with returning to a future where she was dead and his friends were alive and he didn’t need to be the Secret Sugar Baby House Husband any more?

All in all, it was very enjoyable and I will watch it again.

And I look forward to the FanFic.

* This means that Loki in that branch also likely did not participate in the battle against the Dark Elves. His character growth in that moment was likely delayed, but I believe he ultimately would have processed his extreme confusion, self-loathing, and hatred of his betrayal by his “family” Thor enough to join forces with him against the destruction of the universe when it mattered. Perhaps having the extra time to do so might have even served him better. I don’t know if this means Odin chose to die and Hela was released, thus triggering the destruction of Asgard. I don’t know what this would have meant for Ragnarock - possibly with Odin as the King when he died the defenses would have been better (though I argue the culture and peace of Asgard thrived under Loki, especially with his dismantling of the Empire and the valuing of the Arts) and they would have saved Asgard or at least not lost so many.

And if Asgard had not survived, perhaps in this version something different may have happened, and Loki wouldn’t on the survivor ship. Perhaps he was on a different ship. Perhaps he wasn’t present for the battle at all and in a completely different part of the universe.

If he was elsewhere this means

a) The Asgardian survivors would have lived because Thanos wouldn’t have targeted the ship, and Thor would have been less self-loathing.

b) When Thanos found Loki with the Tesseract in this branch, it’s likely Loki was able to ingratiate himself to Thanos and gave the Stone to him without Thor there to tip his hand toward an immediate betrayal murder attempt. I subscribe to the theory that Loki was just as mind-controlled during The Avengers and the Battle of New York as Barton (though I wouldn’t call Loki totally innocent in everything) and that he had been suffering from extreme mental health issues following his unsuccessful attempted suicide. In this case, he would be willing to play the long game to get his revenge on his abuser Thanos. Then, later, hopefully, he joins Thor’s side to save the universe against Thanos (as he did against the Dark Elves)- betraying Thanos and perhaps stopping the Snap before it happened in that timeline. Or if not stopping the Snap, perhaps being a part of the new Avengers if he survived it, or joining in the final battle if he was Snapped Away.

Anyway - I have lots of Loki Thoughts. Feel free to adopt any Plot Bunnies this may have generated in reading this.

#Avengers: Endgame #Review #spoilters #Endgame #Avengers #Storytelling #Loki #Endgame Loki #head cannon #theories #loki theory

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dramallamadingdang · 6 years ago

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Replies!

This batch is for @joanna-squared, @skyburned, @joplayingthesims, @penig, @kayleigh-83, @maryhilton, @clericalrodent, @immerso-sims, and @yandereplumsim...

joanna-squared replied to your photo “The multi-lot park. It’s more-done but not done-done, but this is all...”

This gives me Northern California vibes and it's making me nostalgic.

I was thinking Chicago when I initially saw that terrain:

I was thinking lake/riverfront rather than oceanfront, since I figured I'd put a horizon down that would give the place an opposite "shore." But then, Chicago doesn't have mountains or much in the way of huge pine trees, does it? *laugh* So, I can see California, too, with its big cities sort of mushed in between the Pacific coast and the Sierras, and the pines do give it a more NorCal than SoCal feel.

skyburned replied to your post “vegan-kaktus replied to your photoset “Pics of the multi-lot park in...”

I try to cluster them too using the other side of a big road if I can, something that looks like a realistic separation. I've never been successful putting playable lots right next to deco lots. It looks weird.

Sometimes it works. There are some deco buildings that are in a good scale with “real” buildings. CuriousB seemed to do a good job with that. I use her base-game rabbit hole conversions a lot, interspersed amongst real buildings, and they look pretty good. But the style of them isn’t always right because they’re pretty quaint-looking. And they aren’t skyscrapers, either, which of course you need to do a decent-looking cityscape. :) But those tend to be really out-of-scale so...Yeah, a segregated cluster as a backdrop is the way to go, I think.

joplayingthesims replied to your photo “This is just a little thing that I thought I’d share that may or may...”

Just what I need for Coral Bay. :D

I’m glad it’s helpful! And it’s good to see you here in TumblrLand. :)

penig replied to your post “PSA”

Gay ski week is the greatest concept for a festival I've heard in years! Have fun!

It is hella fun! It’s been going on annually for about...10 years?... now or so. There are people who come in every year for it, and it’s the only time I see those people, so it’s fun hanging out and catching up. Busy, but fun. And skiing drag queens is always a spectacle. :) And the parties. Last night was the karaoke event, which we always do. Tonight is the big dance party, which is crazy-fun. Saturday night, the last night, is an AIDS benefit. It’s a fun, theatrical fashion show that’s like Fashion Week meets Cirque d’Soleil, and then there’s another party. I’ll be exhausted when it’s all done, but it’s awesome.

kayleigh-83 replied to your photoset “The queer hood rogues’ gallery townies. :) There’s a list of names and...”

Yay! My babies are out in the world!

And causing havoc already! For some reason Gavin lost his aspiration. (It seems to happen sometimes when I turn Sims into townies.) And when that happens, ACR loses its freakin’ mind and starts to error like crazy because it can’t make the calculations it needs to make, but at least now I know what causes such a freak-out and I know how to fix it. Took me a bit to find the culprit and, yep, Gavin. :) He better behave from now on! :)

maryhilton replied to your photo “This is just a little thing that I thought I’d share that may or may...”

It looks nice-but I wish you were able to make a horizon that matches islands. I have one that has lots of water, but the the 'far islands' out look too green & not the same color as the terrains I use..sigh.

Have you seen the one that Greatcheesecakepersona made that uses the TS3 Sunlit Tides backdrop? But maybe that’s the one you mean. In all honesty, the horizons are not easy to make at all. (Though I want to take GCP’s city one out for a spin, since I think it might be linearly-mapped and if so it’ll be HELLA easier to deal with.) But generally...It’d likely be easier to make a terrain default that matches the horizon rather than the other way around.

clericalrodent replied to your photo “My Internet browser home page today! :) (Yes, I use Bing as my home...”

*waves* If you ever do come back and have time, you've got to come and visit me

Absolutely! We will do lunch. And dinner. At least once. :) And then you can show us all the cool places in Tallinn that tourists don’t get to see and we can be your dumb American friends that embarrass you. ;)

immerso-sims replied to your photo “My Internet browser home page today! :) (Yes, I use Bing as my home...”

Definitely makes sense. I haven't been to Russia (yet), but I am planning on going there in a couple of years. I would like to come back to Vilnius again too, because that city just has a nice laid back feel to it and I quite enjoyed the artists' neighbourhood. I think they wanted to have something similar to Christiania minus the weed lol Riga is a bit more touristy, but pretty. :)

And you know how I like Christiana! :) Even without the weed I’d like Christiana. :) So, yeah, we will definitely have to check out Vilnius. :) And definitely go to Russia. St. Petersburg is one of my favorite cities in the world. <3 So much history and things to see. I could spend a week in the Hermitage all by itself...

yandereplumsim replied to your photo “Muh hometown, right now. :) We gonna do some skiin’ today, even though...”

Your Hometown is just so freaking cute <3 I love it when you post images of it

It’s a cute (but hella expensive) town. I actually live about 7 miles outside of it, but it’s fun to go into “town” and hang out and stuff. If you ever have a hankering to see it 24/7, there are a couple of webcams here. I’m sure I’m on it sometimes, since my usual hangout when I’m in town is Phoenix Bean, which is one of the places the in-town cam focuses on. :) And my ski jacket has a plumbbob patch on the right shoulders...although I doubt that’d be visible on the webcam...

#joanna-squared #skyburned #joplayingthesims #penig #kayleigh-83 #maryhilton #clericalrodent #immerso-sims #yandereplumsim #replies

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and-then-theres-that · 6 years ago

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Tumblr Community Guidelines

Since everyone is freaking out and obviously only wanting to read what they want to see, OR too lazy to actually click a link:

These go into effect on the 17th.

Community Guidelines

Please note: these new Community Guidelines will not go into effect until 2018-12-17

As a global platform for creativity and self-expression, Tumblr is deeply committed to supporting and protecting freedom of speech. At the same time, we draw lines around a few narrowly defined but deeply important categories of content and behavior that jeopardize our users, threaten our infrastructure, and damage our community.

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(YAY!)

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———————————-

That’s a huge blurb, sorry for all the people I flattened and NO I won’t be putting it behind a read more, no one will.

None of these rules are hard. In fact, they’re really simple.

Don’t post what isn’t yours.

Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not

Don’t scam people

Don’t spam post stupid shit

Don’t tag things that have nothing to do with the tag. (No more kpoppers in the Lee Pace tag!)

Don’t glorify self-harm, abuse or eating disorders.

Don’t bully people

Don’t threaten harming people because they’re not like you

Don’t post explicit, realistic sexual situations and try to call it art.

Don’t attempt sex with a minor, or try to phish for minors

....

Generally what these new guidelines are telling you to do is to BE A GENUINE, NICE PERSON AND DONT TREAT OTHERS LIKE SHIT!

Is that really difficult for some of you? FFS

#tumblr #guidelines #be a nice human #how hard is that to understand #tumblr exodus

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tumblunni · 6 years ago

Text

HI EVERY BODY AAAA

Gonna try and make a quick half weekly update maybe probably! Sorry that i've only been emailing a few people so far, i have to wait a week to get a library card so i can use the library email service. So i've just been running around trying to catch wild wifi wherever it may be, and then kinda failing so i used up some of my mobile data. And i need to ration that throughout the month so i was gonna try sending only weekly emails but then some people sent me emails so i had to reply and then i was like OH NO i am neglecting the everyone else AAAAA

So umm anyway im on mobile data right now and i cant really browse the tumbl cos images and stuff really burn it up. But i can make this one post!! Yay!! Aaa!!

Umm okay maybe i'll make a second post with Big Rambling About What's Happen, for now i kinda need to make a Dumb Ask For Money Time.

I feel so damn guilty cos i havent even finished paying back the 20 bucks some friends leant me two weeks ago for groceries, cos there was all the stress of moving and i just COMPLETELY FORGOT until it was too late and im already here aaaa! And then i was stupid yesterday and i gave all my money to a homeless guy out in the rain. Like i know i should be calling myself stupid cos it was reckless and i didnt think about taking care of myself also, but like i dont think it was stupid cos that guy needed it more than i did. He actually gave me a hug! I felt so bad, like man nobody must have been donating to him if he got so emotional over just that much! I wished i could have given more!! He was stuck in RAIN nobody was helping him in the RAIN what the hell sort of monsters are they?! It was like the windiest rainstorm all year so far! Shop displays were flying out the doors and people were getting beaned in the head with acorns and stuff! This dude had nothing to his name except a lil not very waterproof looking sleeping bag!! It was hard enough to stay out of the rain just as a regular shopping person, imagine how hard it must be to try and find a place to sleep rough when there's all stupid cops chasing you away from anywhere visible because 'blah blah blah tourism we have the army recruitment rally today'. BOOO! there was a goddamn actual tank up at a historic monument of pre-britain celtic civilization and im just like wow fuck you how dare you market this to literal schoolchildren on a summer trip. Anyway i'm going offtopic, what's really important is the SECOND homeless person that i didnt have enough money to help because i gave it all to the first guy. He was an elderly veteran with a missing arm! SO MANY PEOPLE STUCK OUT IN THE DAMN RAIN INCLUDING FORMER SOLDIERS, GOD FUCK U SO MUCH ARMY. Umm anyway so yeah "bunni it is reckless to throw all your money at a stranger and keep none for grocery" NO it is reckless because what if you find another stranger who EVEN MORE needs it more than i do!!!!

Anyway i've been rambling a lot but i just thought that wtf it probably sounds fake to say 'oh i gave all my money to someone in trouble' that sounds like im boasting about my humbleness somehow. So yeah there's a Detailed Ramble that hopefully proves it i guess?? But yeah i have no money now until the 28th. Whoops. Luckily i dont need as much money while im here at the mental hospital cos i eat most meals at the shared kitchen and you have a 4 bucks a week allowance to buy additional supplies. They said i can get the juice i like, cos im stupidly picky and struggle taking my pills with plain water. And i have a bus pass now! A surprise benefit of being hospital'd! The picture on it looks TERRIBLE, i wish i could show you guys! And of course i dont have to pay gas bills here. So all the biggest money pains are gone! But then i've been signed up for two classes each week that are like two towns away and really early in the morning with me probably only getting back at 2pm cos of the travel time. And i wont have free food there, im not allowed to take anything out of the shared kitchen even if its a lunchbox or somethin. So i kinda just need some spare money so i can grab a sandwich or something in the supermarket along the way. And of course there's the fact its just damn hard to kill your boredom in a place like this, so aaa i wish i could buy some cheap books from the thrift store or something. And then there's the biggest ludicrous temptation of there being a BUILD A BEAR WORKSHOP NEAR THE HOSPITAL!! AAAAAAAA!! With the new pokemon collection!! Alola vulpix!! I'm not gonna ask for donations for that, obviously, but i just wanted to tell you cos its AWESOME and its frustrating i have to go past it on this bus route. My goal is to get you by the end of the month, lil snowy friend!!!

SO YEAH SORRY IM GETTING OFFTOPIC HERE I JUST WANNA TELL YOU ABOUT EEEEEVERYTHINGGGGG

Short version: I don't really have a specific amount i'm asking for, im just gonna keep this paypal pool open for the first month and like if you can spare any change it would really help! The help bunni get adjusted to new and terrifying live in hospital strangeness fund! Because bunni was an idiot and gave away all their money on the first damn day! Gahhh!! Okay so seriously if you have anything to spare and ONLY if you have it to spare, i would really appreciate your help. Even if its just 1 dollar/pound/other local currency of which you own! I will hug you greatly!! And if you wanna be added to the weekly email updates list then my email is [email protected] and i would super apprecoate keeping in touch! And if anyone wants to be pokemon go friends i will try and send you gifts everyday!! I need 3 more friends for a quest milestone lol.

OKAY IM TALKING TOO MUCH AAA

For to help the bunn, go the here! And umm lol if you want to signal boost then feel free to just take that link and make your own post thats way damn shorter than this nonsense, lol. I JUST MISS YOU ALL SO MUCHHHH

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putschki1969 · 7 years ago

Audio

Kalafina Club 2018/01/30

Note: Here’s this week’s episode. It’s technically* the first episode after their 10th Anniversary so I thought I’d provide a summary for it. Also, Keiko’s surprise message at the end is the sweetest thing EVER!! Please keep in mind that my Japanese is not the best (my listening comprehension is severely lacking) but I tried my best as always XD [*An episode aired on the actual day of the live but that was recorded before the live so it doesn’t really count. I will probably provide a summary for that once I am done with this one here]

Let’s get right to it 〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→

Episode #391

Day Duty: Hikaru

Song: All My True Love by SPEED (1998) as requested by “まいやいやえいえいる”

Lyrics 今こそ ALL MY TRUE LOVE 愛を受け止めてどんな時だって　私はいつもそばにいるよこわれそうだった日もゆずれなかった　あの夜さえも誇れる時がいつか訪れるあの虹を越えて　響き合う魂よ誰にも負けない！

Wakana says this song makes you feel super refreshed. Keiko asks her if she will be fine this late at night or if she is overhyped now. Wakana replies that, yes, she will be fine, she just got a little overexcited. Time for Kala-Janken. According to Wakana, Hikaru is in battle-mode tonight, she first beats Keiko and then Wakana. Hikaru then goes on to provides the usual intro for Kalafina Club and introduces their opening number => “All My True Love” by SPEED as requested by this fan. Wakana is surprised it’s already been 20 years since this song was released, so nostalgic. Hikaru talks about how she was all giddy when the album (including this song) was finally available in stores. Wakana still loves the song a lot, everytime she listens to it, she gets all “wakuwaku” (excited). They all agree that this piece makes them feel like they are going back in time. It’s the first time they have sung this song together and even though it was hard they wanna sing more SPEED songs on their radio show. Hikaru is suggesting a live where they sing all of their songs XD

♪ Eden ♪

Time for some impressions of their 10th Anniversary Live on Jan 23. First we have a mail by a fan called “おにぎりのぐ”. They say that the 10th Anni Live was super amazing. It was the VERY first Kalafina-live they ever attended, in fact, it was their VERY first concert in general, so the excitement was real. The fan is more than happy that the first live he/she got to experience was an awesome Kalafina concert. To have the concert start with such bright songs like ryb and Mirai was truly heartwarming. The transition between dark songs, warm ballads and upbeat tunes was also great, it was so much fun to get immersed in Kalafina’s world. The fan says that the live almost felt like enjoying some high class French cooking with all those favourite songs being performed. The final song Alleluia left a lasting impression and provided an image of a sparkling future filled with hope. The fan was moved to tears and wants to thank the girls from the bottom of his/her heart.

The girls express their gratitude for this lovely mail and Wakana says she is happy that their final song Alleluia was capable of conveying such a strong feeling of hope. She says that a lot of her friends also voted for Alleluia and she thinks it’s great that they got to do a live where pretty much the entire setlist was comprised of songs that were chosen by the audience.

Keiko then says that they are actually recording this episode just two days after the live so the memories are still super fresh, their nerves are still on edge, their bodies are still 100% in concert mode so to speak XD [at least according to Keiko, not sure about the other two] It’s cute how Keiko says it’s “radio magic” that the episode airs much later than it was recorded XD

Hikaru talks about how she felt super close to the audience during their first two songs, it felt really nice to start their live by singing “ryb” and “Mirai” while looking at everyone’s faces in the audience. Even during the rehearsals they felt like these two songs would be perfect to literally “break the ice” and get everyone in the right mood for the concert. It’s the same with “Ongaku” which also always serves as a sort of mood-maker.

♪ ring your bell ♪

More impression of their 10th Anni. This time a mail by a fan called ぴーち /Peach. The fan talks about how they traveled all the way from Osaka to see the live. It’s the first time they have travelled this far for a live. The girls are very happy to hear that. On the way back home the fan looked through the entire pamphlet, read all the interviews as well as Yuki Kajiura’s message. The final page of the pamphlet left a lasting impression because it was so beautiful. The live itself was amazing, the three hours passed by so quickly, there were lots of tears as would be expected from a Kalafina live. Peach hopes that the girls will take a break now so they can recover from all the work in 2017. Their minds and bodies deserve to take some rest [I wholeheartedly agree!] A final big thank you for the gorgeous harmony that was created on that day. Keiko seems a bit embarrassed by all the praises in this mail. She is like, “Peach! Stop it!!” She is very happy tho that the final page of their pamphlet is so well-received. She explains that when it comes to Kalafina pamphlets they usually don’t smile and even if they do, it’s without showing teeth. To have this sort of picture for their 10th Anniversary pamphlet feels very special and she thinks it’s fitting because they are very happy to finally celebrate their 10th Anniversary so why not show that happiness in the pamphlet, right? Hikaru agrees, it’s a very “real” and casual picture. Wakana says this was taken while they were casually talking with each other during a break. [Truly the best picture of the enture pamphlet which is why I chose it as cover image for this episode ~ in case you wondered]

Wakana continues by saying that, yes, the three hours went by in the blink of an eye. They can’t believe they actually performed three hours, it felt so short. The other two agree, it didn’t feel like three hours at all. Even with the lack of MC and encore it felt like time was flying because they were focused on singing.

They continue by talking about various arrangements. Like for example, the changed arrangement for “serenato” where they included the accordion player. They think it added a lot of atmosphere to the song. Speaking of arrangments, they say that they always try to think of something new for the bridge in Ongaku. When they do the introductions of their musicians, it’s supposed to sound different every time. They are particularly proud of the instrumental solos this time around. [I agree, it sounded a lot better than usual for some reason, more intentional than just random playing :P]

♪ progressive ♪

Hikaru provides info on upcoming events. And then Keiko quietly asks if it’s okay to read out a message she has written, she has prepared a short note for both Wakana and Hikaru. The two of them seem very surprised. YAY, surprise message by Keiko. This is by far the highlight of the episode. Listen closely to Keiko.

To Hiichan: In these ten long years Hiichan has been listening to the conversations of who knows how many people, always remaining silent. During this time she has become a beacon of immense support for me. I truly respect Hikaru’s attitude of listening quietly. From now onwards I would like Hikaru to have conversations with many people, in her own way of communicating through singing. Thank you for these past ten years!

To Waka-chan: Wakachan's voice is truly the defining feature of Kalafina, as defining as a face is to the human body. I feel like despite many pressures and hurdles throughout the past ten years Hikaru and I have contributed to putting various expressions on that face, wishing to preserve this defining feature, wanting to protect her voice. I am incredibly grateful. From Keiko*

Towards the end of her message for Wakana, you can clearly hear how Keiko gets all choked up, she has trouble to continue talking. It’s the sweetest thing ever to hear her get so emotional. And then when you hear how Wakana thanks her for the message, it’s obvious that she has been reduced to tears. Awwwww! *sobs*

Shout-out to @kuroiyuki88 who helped me translate these messages.

Keiko then cutely asks Hikaru to finish the episode and that’s a wrap XD

#kalafina #kalafina club #summary #translations #my translations #cute keiko

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