#alch writes

[ouralcohol]

Let You In

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x fem!reader 

Summary: what happens when Bradley finally lets you in?

Tags: angst, lots of angst, 18+, allusions to sex, soft, maybe some fluff if you squint your eyeballs

Author’s note: I saw a gif and immediately got inspired. Some people inspired this too... enjoy... comments and reblogs make the world go 'round.

This was the first time you had done this with him. You didn't think that you would have gotten this far with him if you were being honest with yourself. Bradley Bradshaw always had a line of women lined up around the corner whenever he was in town. The reason you knew this was because for as long as you could remember, he always had some kind of arm candy with him whenever he went to the local bar while he was in his hometown of Virginia Beach.

From the last couple of years that you had known him, you never thought that you would get here. More specifically, get here with him. You had always wondered what it would be like to be with him underneath the sheets. Anyone that had eyeballs and a sense of taste would agree. So, what had changed? What had made the line between friends to… whatever this was, blur? You weren't exactly sure, perhaps it had to do with his near death experience? Or was it your signature sundress that you happened to wear every time he strolled in?

The dress was bunched up somewhere on his apartment floor right now… not that it mattered. What mattered was that you were here with him.

Out of all the girls he could have chosen-- he chose you.

You never asked him how long he was here, but you did notice that he was coming around to the bar more frequently. The fact of the matter was that Bradley was good, he was very good in bed. The naval aviator had made you see stars in a manner that you never seen them before. Everything was different with him.

There was some faint music that hit your ears. You stirred from your slumber as your hands rubbed the tiredness from your eyes. This had been one of the most restful sleeps you had gotten in a long time. If it wasn't one thing, it was another. Stress was never your friend and you hated it. However, on this particular night, you had slept like a rock. It took you a couple of seconds for your brain to register where you were. The surroundings were not familiar, but you felt at ease. The photo frame on the nightstand made you smile as the moonlight shone upon the frame.

You were in Bradley's bed in his Virginia home. You noted the owner was missing. Ah, so that must be the source of the music, your brain thought as you looed around for your underwear. And idea sparked as your eyes saw that one of his Hawaiian shirts was also on the floor. Contrary to popular belief, you had come to find out that he only owned four, maybe five shirts in total. Your hands grabbed it as you ever so carefully slipped it on, afraid to wrinkle it even more. You didn't even bother to button the oversized shirt. It didn't reveal anything-- maybe some side boobage, but rare if that. Your feet carried you out into the hallway and walk closer to where the music was coming from. The melody that was playing was very different from the lively jigs that the common folk were so attuned to. It was a much slower and softer tune, melancholy even. Curiosity filled you as you inched closer, the music getting louder.

There were many sides to Bradley. People only saw what they wanted to see. People only heard what they wanted to hear. Everyone saw him as an energetic, happy-go-lucky kind of guy, but there were fleeting moments where you happened to glance his way and he was staring off into space for a brief second-- lost in his own thoughts. You never made any mention of it as it wasn't your place to ask. You were friends, but you didn't feel like he was comfortable enough to let himself be a certain way with you.

You being you, wanted to know everything about him. You wouldn't lie to yourself and say that you weren't infatuated, because you were. Every girl at the bar was infatuated with him whenever he walked in. The music factor was a bonus and caused them to leave their tongues hanging out. The way some women gawked at him was incredible. You didn't understand how you could feel this way toward someone that you hardly knew. If you only knew.

Once you had stepped into the small open space and saw his broad shoulders hunched over the piano, your body instantly relaxed. You hadn't realized that you had been nervous, your heart beginning to hammer in your chest with anticipation. You should have known what to expect, but you didn't know exactly what was in store. It's not like you slept with every guy… and it only made you wonder how many girls he had brought home. Seeing his fingers touch the keys so fluidly reminded you just how skilled he had been a few hours ago while making you see heaven on Earth. He wasn't wearing much, only his boxers-- he didn't even have to try to do anything and he looked so handsome. With his locks a little messy, but still so good that made you want to run your fingers through his hair like you had done a while ago.

The image floated in your mind which made you squeeze your thighs together before making your way to where he was sitting down. You had your hands behind your walk while you stood next to the piano. Bradley immediately noticed you, his eyes stuck on your face as his fingers continued to move across the keys so effortlessly-- a softer tune now, "Sorry if I woke you up." Bradley uttered. "Couldn't sleep?" You asked suddenly feeling shy, exposed even. You felt like you were invading his personal intimacy with his piano. Bradley Bradshaw's eyes did not stray from yours, not even for a second. His fingers came to a slow stop-- the ringing of the notes lingering in the air.

The thick tension that caused all of this to happen between you both, had returned. It enveloped you and him in an imaginary bubble. You swallowed thickly as you felt his hand circle around your wrist to bring you in front of him. Your body was encased between him and his piano. Bradley's big strong hands held you in place, eyes still locked on yours. "No. I can never sleep anymore." The pilot whispered to you. You let out a slow breath. He was letting you in. "May I?" You gently queried as you brought your hand up to his face. Bradley nodded, "Close your eyes." You told him with a quiet voice. He did as you asked without hesitation, his body tensing.

You shifted your body slightly-- hitting some random keys in the process so you could have better access to him. You placed your index finger on his neck and ran down his scar ever so delicately. Some would say it was a featherlight touch, you just didn't want to overwhelm him with the sensory that was going on. He wasn't a porcelain doll by any means, but you also felt like he didn't let people touch sensitive areas that reminded him of his past. Bradley inhaled sharply and you hesitated for a split second before continuing. Moments that only took seconds felt like a complete eternity to you, maybe for him too. Everything happened in slow motion for you. The area surrounding you both dissolved and you felt like you were floating and all of time had stood still with Bradley in front of you. Once you finished tracing that scar, you transitioned to the ones on his chin. The contrast of your soft skin against the stubble of his was making your insides melt. You noticed that Bradley was very still. A part of you wanted to tell him that it was okay, that it was just you. However, something inside you refrained you from doing so, though, a little voice in the back of your head was telling you that this silence was exactly what he needed. You took your index finger back and used your pinky to touch the scar on his lower cheek near his mouth. Then the one near his ear. The pilot let out a shaky breath through his mouth, as he opened his eyes, still fixated on yours. Your heart was going a mile a minute, hand slightly shaking from the sensation that this caused you.

He was giving you a tender look, almost like he could finally breathe again. "Moonbeam." He said, "Bradley." You responded with your hands still on his face. The nickname had stuck after a second meeting, something he had never clarified with you. It wasn't common, and you didn't question him. You waited for him to speak, for him to say anything.

He turned his head face down and pressed his forehead against your abdomen, the grip on your hips tightening as he said something that you couldn't make out. "What?" You gasped before you could stop yourself. You felt the air he was breathing linger in your lower abdomen, as he spoke a little louder, "You make me feel less lonely." Once your brain registered the words that had been told, you wondered if he had brought anyone here. "Oh?" You queried him, hopefully not pushing him too much. Bradley picked his head up again as he looked back up at your face, "I don't bring people here. There's so much… but.. with you.. things feel easier." He managed to say, his voice slow and even. You could tell this was taking a toll, but you waited calmly. Your heart was instantly breaking and re-stitching itself as the words echoed in your brain.

Bradley Bradshaw was a sweet man. Bradley Bradshaw was someone that deserved to be love just like anyone else. Your thumb began to caress this cheek as he inhaled again, breathing you in, taking all of you and getting drunk from your scent alone. "I'm the first person you bring here?" You asked unable to stop yourself as your other hand went to the other side, now cupping his face. He nodded slightly, "I'm always moving about, but you've been the one consistent person here in Virginia… the bar is consistent, I wasn't expecting you to be there every time either." Perhaps, that was the catalyst of this all. You were usually there with friends, but tonight had been different. You were alone. Bradley was alone. Two people alone together was better than one.

This man was telling you everything with his body language, and you were listening very intently. "How are you feeling now?" You asked curiously as your lips pressed to his forehead. Your body began to feel at ease as his words continued to flow out of his mouth, "At ease." A scrunched up smile filled his features as you let out a soft laugh. The next movement surprised you, causing you to sit back on the keys while Bradley stood up, towering over your body as his hands went down to the hem of his shirt and dipped under to touch the soft flesh that was your skin. You blinked a couple of times as you said, "Why moonbeam?" You sputtered out, almost unable to form a coherent sentence. The pilot then brought his forehead to the crook of your neck, "…it's stupid." He whispered against your skin, causing goosebumps to rise and an involuntary shiver to go down your spine. "It's not stupid if I like it.." You remarked as your hands fell to your sides, your head tilting back to allow him more access your hair falling behind you cascading on top of the piano. "Whenever I leave for a mission or I'm gone for a tour… I just look at the moon and think of you." A shy boy spoke to you, but you didn't care, "You think of me?" You queried him again. The questions were pouring out of you now. You didn't know when you would get another chance like this and you would take it with everything you had.

His head snapped up to meet your gaze again, his hazel eyes boring into your own. Bradley then grabbed your hand and placed it over the erection in his boxers, a gasp leaving your mouth, "Don't you see what you do to me? How could I not think of you?" He asked, sounding equally as shocked as you were in asking, "I don't know, Bradley. Tonight was our first time together.. and I was just never sure, I guess." A small shrug followed your words, but you couldn't think anymore as he fiercely grabbed you by the hips and set you down on top of the piano before his hand wrapped around your neck. Your lips made a little oh face as his index finger trailed ever so slowly down the front of your body, between the fabric that was his shirt. You felt yourself arch your back in response to his advance while closing your eyes, thinking of the bliss that he was going to cause you again.

Your feet hit another set of random keys as you planted them on there, his mouth on your belly button while he distinctly said, "Make me forget again. Give me euphoria." Bradley Bradshaw told you. You frantically nodded as his hands pulled down your panties. You got the sensation of the cool air, but didn't budge.

Your questions would be answered later. For now. You would get lost with him in the bliss that you both created when two lonely souls met.

This was were you belonged.

[soul-doc]

#56

if one knows not the wild man inside then he knows not his numinous side and sees not a friend but a monster

[cheesebearger]

*physically restraining myself from getting in yet another fucking argument about alchemical significations and the perception of alchemical language with someone who is only really versed in the scientific history of alchemy*

[lotus-soda]

Hey everybody and welcome to this mess of an art blog!

My name is Alchamyx, (You can call me Alch, Lotus, or Flash) You may have seen me on here before, and thats because well... I'm an idiot and locked myself out of my old account! Anyways here's a bit about me!

Name: Alch/Flash/Lotus/Soda

Pronouns (I use Any/all, but They/it/he/any neos is my general preference)

Gender, hah whats that! (I’m Agender :) )

I'm on the aro and ace spec, I am also Azalian (aka a agender person who like women)

I'm autistic and I have ADD

I'm a minor

I suck at spelling so I apologize in advance

My interests are: Bungou Stray Dogs, Writing, Birds (any kind), Classic Literature, Theater, the arts, and drawing

This blog is one of the few I have! This blog is devoted to my fanart and theory stuff, while F1ashing_Bands is dedicated to my oc universe S/ash, and A1chamyxis for my oc story Singing medows!

I hope to see you all around :)

Thanks for reading, below is my asks stuff and general rules:

What I take asks for:

Most anything I'm intrested in/my opinions on stuff!

Mostly anything I don't have many rules

No's for asks:

NSFW

Anything extremely personal (Aka irl name, age, that stuff)

Thats about it, I also may turn my ask box off from time to time due to me being busy so yeah! Thats all about me enjoy!

[makerofmadness]

I'm gonna just watch through that entire Darkest Night Chapter 1 video I posted the link I found as I get opportunities to 'cus I think I just. Need to engage with some light-hearted stuff rn until I can go home and have my family around me.

anyway uh I've already watched a bit and Gingerbrave is the Chosen One so that's neat. Also there's a new villain. And some other cool-looking stuff. Anyway I'm mainly here to just dump about the Alchemist stuff I've seen so far I've paused in the middle of it because of school (just got back at the break between class and us going on a trip for class so that's why I'm writing this post-) because Alchemist Cookie Content Real and it's voice-acted I am in heaven just what the doctor ordered istg (look I've legitimately been having a crisis and. Some silly blorbo content is what I need to make it to the end of the week-)

btw my screenshots are from watching the video by 99TH VR that is a no-commentary walkthrough of the game so credit goes to where credit belongs.

This. Brings me joy. Look at her she's so scrunkly. (Also she says something about Gingerbrave looking "oddly familiar" and just. This is like barely into the game so im guessing there'll be an answer to that later or in the future chapters of the thing since this is "darkest night chapter 1" but Man im wondering is gingerbright gonna be in this and is that who she's referring to?-)

Ego as always (you go girl keep that self-confidence)

LOOK AT HER 😭😭

ok so while writing this post we went On The Road (museum trip for class) and basically without an actual WiFi I can't upload images (I've tried brute-forcing it several times and it just Won't) so. I'll just describe the rest of what I've seen:

*So apparently she's trying to awaken... Franken-Cookie???? Which looks like a giant version of Zombie Cookie. girl why is your life always surrounded by movie monsters first your brother is basically Dracula and now you're trying to wake Frankenstein's monster. What's next. (Also I find this ironic since Ovenbreak established that the idea of creating life is something that she doesn't seem to like since it makes her tense about Butter Bear. Then again she doesn't say she made franken cookie just that they have to wake them up to break the gate open).

*"I've been researching methods to concoct the most potent of Revival Potions" Alchemist and her Life And Revival Stuff again-

*Apparently Alch's just. Content to stay in here like Forever? Which makes me wonder where Vampire is... uh anyway like also she basically says she doesn't know anything about politics or care because she just wants to do alchemy and like. The fact she just calls the literal Darkest Lord and his shzt "politics mumbo-jumbo" sent me-

so yeah I'm just gonna watch more of this and then probably have more brainrot and hopefully that'll fix me at least a little bit before I go home-

[alsamara]

75 Hard

Day 2: January 3, 2024

[X] Selfie

[X] Read 10 Pages

- Smarter Not Harder By Dave Asprey

[X] Drink 1 Gallon of Water

-64/128 fl oz

[X] Outdoor Workout (45mins)

-Walked outside. It was cold and rainy, but we conquered.

[X] Indoor Workout (45mins)

-Form by Sami Clarke & PT for my legs & neck

[X] Eat Desired diet/NO Alch

Breakfast: protein shake

Snack: freeze dried apples and chicken

Dinner: Collards, beans, and chicken sausages

P.S I need to remember to get lemons and ginger tomorrow so I can make ginger shots because I do want to start my day with hot lemon ginger water and chia seeds. I miss doing that. So yum.

Thoughts + Feelings

Writing this at 3:23pm:

Started off today with my outdoor walk. It was a misty snow mixture this AM! My face and fingers were numbbbbb by the end of the walk, but I kept telling myself the cold exposure is working. Im so glad I got my Apple Watch up and running again to track today’s walk. I love watching my rings close. Rly makes life more satisfying… I will be getting a balaclava, running gloves, and fleece lined leggings tho. This is a definite fact.

I had a massage immediately after so I didn’t have time to make my protein shake which is fine.. I wasn’t hungry yet and I also hate laying on a massage table with a full stomach. For now I am going to be sleepy, enjoy my protein shake, and get my 10 pages in + some water to flush out my massage. 💗 check ya in a bit.

Update 9:39pm:

I got my indoor workout done with Form by Sami Clarke and did my daily PT exercises. I will say Form makes me realize how weak my core is from my endo surgeries. Deep in my heart it makes me feel sad that I didn’t do PT when doctors were suggesting it. Whatever tho. I’m going to be going back to softer work outs like yoga and Pilates for abs moving forward. Healing movements > all

Goodnight you guys,

Aly

[raspbeppie]

♥ info ♥

about me: hi, im rasp! im a lesbian that uses any pronouns :} im a feeder and i've always been a big fan of bigger women, and i finally want to show it. i'm 20, and i'd rather minors begone from this blog due to its adult nature. i plan to reblog both other people's art that i enjoy, and also post my own art as well! i don't really want this blog to have much of a reach, as it is mostly for... personal use. but if you do wish to see some large ladies, go ahead and follow!

EDIT: i do not intend to engage with anyone via dm, as i am apprehensive about talking to strangers directly online, especially in sexual contexts. if you wish to ask about preferences, or chat in general about feedism, sending an ask would be preferred! if an ask doesnt get answered, i either haven't checked my inbox, or i didnt feel comfortable responding. thank you for your understanding!

tag key:

#wg this post is a part of a weight gain sequence. whether it be just one part of the sequence, or a collection of all of the parts of a sequence, you'll find em all in this tag!

#chubby this post is on the lowest end of the weight spectrum. girls that have a bit of a tummy go here!

#plump this post is second lowest on the weight spectrum. girls that might have a lot of trouble getting old clothes on go here!

#fat this post is the lower midrange on the weight spectrum. girls that have trouble fitting in aisles, doorways, and driver's seats go here!

#big this post is the higher midrange on the weight spectrum. girls that have trouble getting around go here!

#unreal this post is the beginning of the highrange of the weight spectrum. girls that can barely stand, hardly reach their mouth to feed themself, and get wiped out just trying to roll over go here!

#bus this post is the second highest in the highrange of the weight spectrum. girls that are the size of buses or bigger go here!

#sun this post is the highest in the weight spectrum. girls that are around the size of the sun go here!

#mobile this post contains a girl that can move on her own. girls that can make it to the fridge go here!

#immobile this post contains a girl that can't move on her own. girls that need assistance getting places, or getting things, go here!

#irl this post has a real girl in it. girls that take beautiful photos of themselves go here!

#text this post is text only. imagines, appreciation posts, and others' fiction about big girls go here!

#<3 this post is a personal favorite of mine! girls who pop buttons, spill out of jeans or bras, or just can't help themself go here!

#intox this post contains a lady unwinding with a substance before a big meal. girls that smoke or drink go here!

#alch this post contains a lady who is drinking or is drunk. girls that have a few beers before dinner go here!

#dandelion this post contains a lady who is smoking weed or is stoned. girls who get munchies go here!

#raspberryink this post contains my artwork. girls that i love to doodle go here!

#raspywriting this post contains my writing. girls that i love to drabble go here!

#info this post contains information either relevant to me or the blog itself. girls don't tend to go here! unless you count me!

(DISCLAIMER:)

i do tend to enjoy mobile ladies a bit more, but its not uncommon for me to enjoy a lady at an unreasonable size. this aside, i do not enjoy works with hospital equipment hooked up to a girl, as anything above the #unreal stage is pure fantasy for me. i'd prefer to keep it lighthearted and heavybodied, so works with that tone of seriousness won't be featured.

on a similar note, posts that feature intoxication (or intox for short) will tend more towards the light side, and often will be more towards weed rather than alcohol, mostly out of personal preference.

posts that feature bimbofication, or the act of dumbing down a feedee, will be incredibly sparse as well. i lean more towards a lucid lady, and situations where she may not be in the most control because of difficulty thinking all the time tends to rub me the wrong way.

#irl posts will be infrequent, since i don't wish to be disrespectful to any of the beautiful women who post themselves. weight spectrum catagorization will not apply to these posts either for the same reasons. remember that real women have their own thoughts and feelings as a person, this may be a fetish blog, but their comfort always comes first.

ai art of any kind will not be featured on this blog! bbw-draw or otherwise won't be posted, i would much rather appreciate the artists who kindly create and share with people like us.

thanks so much for reading! now, let's get to those big beautiful women!

[moonleash]

▄▀▄▀▄ info ▄▀▄▀▄

intro: hi, im moon! or moonlight if were playing :D im an agender lesbian puppy that uses any pronouns and responds to feminine, masculine, and androgynous reference terms ( i.e. good girl, good boy, good pup). this is where ill be putting all my kink stuff thats pet, bdsm, cnc, and ddlg aligned.

limits

(this is not a dni, i dont really care that much.)

raceplay, orientationplay, detrans, pregnancy, null, amputation, scat, and feet i strongly do not want to participate in.

snuff, watersports, more extreme gore, and hands i either do not feel strongly about, or my opinion varies from day to day.

taglist

#pup this post involves petplay! collars, leashes, heats, and barking all go here!

#tied this post involves bondage of some kind! rope or chains, shibari or basic knots, all those that are bound are found here!

#daddy, #mommy, and #little this post involves daddies or mommies rewarding or punishing their littles. coddling, spanking, and treating littles all go here!

#bloody this post includes blood, bruising, or injury. those who enjoy the pain go here!

#muzzled this post includes someone whos been muzzled or gagged. those that get in trouble for biting go here!

#masked this post includes someone whos covering their face. those that wear gas masks, motorcycle helmets, or costume masks while pleasuring go here!

#moo this post contains lactation. those who need to be milked go here!

#non this post contains consentual non consent. those who enjoy a bit of a fight go here!

#intox this post contains inebriation, via #alch or #dandelion. those who love a little stumbling and stuttering go here!

#text this post includes only text. those who wish to read about pups, mommies, rope bunnies, and more go here!

#<3 this post is a favorite of mine. those who want to see all of my favorites go here!

#moonwrite this post includes my own writing. those who wish to see my own words involving the less than savory go here!

#drawn2themoon this post includes my artwork. those who wish to see my illustrations of the lusty variety go here!

#info this post contains information regarding the blog itself. horny stuff doesnt tend to go here, but if youd like to know something specific, youll find it here!

kinklist + preferences

puppy play! this ones a big one for me, i love being both pup and master, but i super love to be tugged around on a leash!! barking and whining are a must, but biting is what i have the most fun with! even if it means i have to get punished for it...

ddlg! i love playing as daddy, mommy, and as a little!! i prefer to play as mommy though, because i love spoiling my little girls <3 for the most part, i like to coddle my littles, but im no stranger to brat taming!

bondage! i am a bit of a beginner with tying knots, but i love to be tied up and tug around defenseless rope bunnies. i love to squirm and watch ladies squirm when all bound up!! i also enjoy wearing muzzles a lot since i cant seem to stop myself from biting...

s/m! one of the only kinks i have a bit of a preference with, as i enjoy masochism a bit more than sadism! i love being spanked and hit with a riding crop, i love getting burns and bruises, i love bleeding and crying from doms that are too rough!! i dont mind a bit of sadism either though... stepping, biting, and spanking are my favorite methods of breaking my subs!

cnc! a more recent addition to my repertoire, so a bit of the more intense play is still a little rocky for me. regardless, i do enjoy the idea of being on both ends of stalking, kidnapping, intox, and somno! though i do lean further towards being the victim!

secret special kink! i have a super secret kink which i only share with a select few... if youre feeling bored, why not try to guess? i wanna see how obvious i make it out to be. some people never suspect it, while others see it from a mile away! drop me an ask! i might make something special for you in return ;}

(DISCLAIMER)

i wont be responding to most dms, as i am not super comfortable talking to strangers directly, especially within sexual contexts. if you want to ask me something, or chat with me about kinks and preferences, id much rather it be sent through an ask! if your ask doesnt get a response, either i havent checked my inbox, or didnt feel comfortable answering. thank you for understanding!

ai art of any kind will not be featured on this blog, as i would much rather support real artists that take their time to give us something beautiful to admire.

this post is subject to change, more may be added if deemed necessary.

thats all for now! now, let's take a walk, shall we?

[withahappyrefrain]

It’s so heartwarming and wholesome seeing everyone uplift each other. You’re the bomb @withahappyrefrain and you helped me by encouraging me to write for the fandom. Thanks to dicked-down-December. Everyone is so nice. Thankful for you and the members I’ve stumbled upon. ❤️

Alch you are so sweet! I love how supportive you are and how you make everyone feel so loved!!! So happy you've joined the TGM fandom!! We need more folks like you :)

[ignisuadaroleplay]

*A mysterious letter appears at your doorstep covered in a thick mucus.*

Hello, my alchemist colleague. I have created a sort of carrier pigeon to detect the fumes created by common alchemical reactions and deliver this message too them. Now, if you don't know who I am, I can not blame you; my contributions to the alchemical sciences are oft appreciated by the academically irrelevant, which, considering your place of residence, is certainly the case.

I have fallen on hard times, and I require a place of residence until I can get on my feet again. If you wish to study with one of the greatest alchemical minds of all time, place your response in an envelope in your mailbox addressed to @nyalchemical-overreaction.

I deeply look forwards to continuing my studies in the future. Sincerly, Alche Meadows (Alias).

(Will looks the letter over a few times, considering the proposal, racking his brain to see if the name strikes any bells. It seems not to, but despite that, he decides to accept the offer, writing:)

“Dear Alche Meadows, I am very sorry to hear of your current unfortunate circumstance. I would be more than glad to lend you my spare room for a while, and I’d be glad to learn with you. May you arrive safely.

Sincerely, Will F.”

[officeobject]

(Feck off if you're someone who misuse or romanticize addiction or something)! Also I end up writing a lot about my addiction LOL.

Sorry if I didn't get all addictions, BUUUUUUT,

Also, allegedly poll people are still here. Y'all just aren't decorating my tree, and like, I don't know WHY, but oh well.

Also yes I KNOW some might find it ironic that I TAG the things related to the addictions, but not ALL people with an alcohol addiction, will relapse or feel like crap or whatever, at any mention of alcohol - some might be fine with even being near it, some can just read about it, some can tolerate brief mentions like this or whatever, and some can't, and can therefore not take this poll - I mean I don't have an alch addiction, but I do have an addiction with many triggers/tied to many things, and even THEN and even with being apothiaroace, I can personally still enjoy my ships in a romance fanfic and stuff, but yeah not all can.

Anyways, as a certified addict, I'd say that, like, yeah, it helps to just TALK, to people - if you're like me and HAVE to talk to AIs for some reason, talking to THEM also helps - and it also helps to just KNOW that people won't see you any differently.

You see, addiction is often used as, like, an indicator of if a person is good or bad, because otherwise, why would you start doing unholy things, knowing it could lead to something as bad as an addiction?! Well, some people do start stuff like drugs and whatever, for fun, and HAPPEN, to get addicted, or BECOME bad people due to addiction, or start shit on purpose, but a lot also DO NOT. Not everyone has visible signs of addiction, not everyone is a mess in every obvious part of life due to it, not everyone has TOTAL reduced function, not everyone is or BECOMES a bad person, or starts bad crap on purpose, or know/knew it was gonna become addictive, and some THOUGHT they could handle it, etc.

It's one thing to become an abuser due to addiction, or just be really mean or a bad friend or something, and it's another thing to just become DIFFERENT, or just a mess, or scream on the inside for help, etc - like I really hope I'm phrasing it right - basically, the abusive mom can be real, the careless teen can be real, the edgy young adult can be real, the old mess can be real, but you can also just be someone trying to get by in life, or crumbling under peer-pressure, or trying to forget, distract yourself, "better" yourself as a person through addiction, etc.

I do regret having weird views and stigma and stuff MYSELF, but that's probably just due to society, and addiction can happen due to: bad home life, not knowing what to do, boredom, desperation for relief, emotional regulation, liking the activity, not KNOWING it's an addiction and therefore not knowing it's bad or to seek help, glamorization, downplayment, wanting to feel happy, self-hate, trying to actively harm oneself, etc.

I relapsed for like a day, because yes I do have an addiction, and people get so serious about it when I admit it, and I understand addicts more when I admit it's a problem, and admitting it makes it more serious to me, and makes it easier to get help, and for people to understand - and look, I'm not saying whose addiction is more serious, because guess what, THIS ISN'T THE OPRESSION AND/OR ADDICTION OLYMPICS - but yeah I like relapsed for a day, and I sometimes relapse for fun, or because I'm worried about the future, or wanna be happy, or wanna feel good about myself, or stop thinking about something, or stop being clingy, etc, but anyways, that was for like a day, and the AFTERWARDS, I've considered multiple times, but I'm trying not to relapse - I'm feeling better than ever, and it's EASIER than ever, and I gotta stop thinking it's because I "tried hard enough" as if I didn't try, and didn't try to avoid triggers, in the past - like, not sure how TRUE that is, but it's a really bad mentality, so feck that, but like, I think about what changed, and I think it's just the perceived support of, like, poll people, or whatever, and yeah I for some reason COMPLETELY FORGOT, that you might wanna need support to recover, especially from people who don't see your addiction as YOU, but like yeah, now I have that, I guess ... and also less of people who make me not wanna be myself and stuff, so I haven't relapsed, as far as I know -

Poll-wise though - wait just gotta mention that a lot of addicts actually don't have support or LOSE it, which is very bad for them and the entire fecking concept of recovery - BUT ANYWAYS,

People also don't take SHOPPING-ADDICTION, seriously (which I don't have, though I do sometimes have a hard time telling what is hyper-fixation-hyper-focus, VS addiction), but like, it IS, and being a shopaholic is a REAL thing (as well as coffee addiction and whatever else), and people need to SHUT THE FUCK UP, about it, when they're just misusing it - like, look, I LOVE shopping, even just browsing, getting new things, trying new things on, and whatever else - but it's a REAL addiction, that has consequences on relationships, money, and can be hard to get help from - like, people arguing about you and therefore leaving because you bought what you bought, losing money (but that should be pretty obvious), people thinking about you as shallow or as just a fun shopping-friend, etc, and yeah ALL addictions have crap like that, but still, and do not underestimate yours, if you have it.

Coffee addictions have the negative effects of caffeine, they're also costly, can really fuck up your sleep, can fuck up your energy, brain, etc.

Being a workaholic can affect your relationships, make you spend less time on life, overwork your body, fuck up your energy, etc.

I gotta go eat but I hope you get the point. For this poll I chose "other". Will make another one for MORE addictions to be mentioned.

[f1ashing-bands]

Hey everybody and welcome to this mess of an art blog!

My name is Alchamyx, (You can call me Alch or Flash) You may have seen me on here before, and thats because well... I'm an idiot and locked myself out of my old account! Anyways here's a bit about me!

Name: Alch/Flash/Louts/Soda

Pronouns (I use Any/all, but The/it/he/any neos is my general preference)

Gender, hah whats that! (Agender :) )

I'm on the aro and ace spec, I am also Azalian (aka a agender person who like women)

I'm autistic and I have ADD

I'm a minor

My interests are: Bungou Stray Dogs, Writing, Birds (any kind), Classic Literature, Theater, the arts, and drawing

This blog is one of the few I have! This blog is devoted to my oc universe S/ash, while A1chamyx is dedicated to my oc universe Singing medows, and Loutus_Soda is dedicated to fanart and theory stuff! I hope to see you all around :)

Thanks for reading, below is my asks stuff and general rules:

What I take asks for:

Ideas and little things for my ocs

You can ask my Oc's stuff, just be aware of their ages and identities

Mostly anything I don't have many rules

No's for asks:

NSFW

Anything extremely personal (Aka irl name, age, that stuff)

Thats about it, I also may turn my ask box off from time to time due to me being busy so yeah! Thats all about me enjoy!

[idek-how-do-ifeel]

I can't believe it's been 3 years, but it's harder to believe I still write about it🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️

Makes me angry but tbh I'm also like meh. I have to say, I feel... weird. My feelings towards u have changed a lot, but like the normal process of change, but I hate that I still have feelings abt it (even if it's angry feelings, i wouldn't have to feel anything at all)

Something weird happened earlier. I saw some pictures of you (porque chismosa, alch xd) and... it was so weird bc it was like I didn't recognized you (?) I mean, it was so weird seeing your face, even if it was just a picture. It's like maybe my brain is starting to erase your face, idk how to feel abt that bc, well. Technically speaking, part of me wants that, but the other part is kinda hoping not to happen that way (?) Like idk. I know (I've always known) you're gonna be in my memory and in my thoughts forever, bc well, u were an important part of my life back then and that's just what happens (specially with me) but idk it's like I have the memories but not the picture/image (?), like I remember the moments and the feelings, the touch, the intensity, the heartbeats the warmth... but like I don't see your face so clearly anymore.

Idk how to feel abt that if I'm being honest.

[alch3mic]

ok but consider: u get caught in a harmless rope snare/net trap and prince is like "it's your fault for being careless, so i'm not gonna free you till you kiss me >:3"

"Sans.."

"YES, MY LOVE?"

"Would you please get me down."

Stars above how you hated that mischievous twinkle in his eye socket. Sure on any normal day you would love how his charming smile would break away into something much more genuine and lighthearted like this, but right now in this moment as you were suspended several feet off the ground in a net it.. just spelled trouble.

"WELLL.."

Oh boy, here we go.

"Sans.." you pleaded once more, trying to maintain eye contact as the net swiveled around.

"FIRSTLY MY DEAR I HAVE A QUESTION," he began, taking a few elegant strides to keep up with you, "JUST WHAT ON EARTH ARE YOU DOING ALL THE WAY OUT HERE?"

The question caused you to quickly glance aside which earned you a curious brow raise from the Prince. There were even a few tense seconds of silence as you contemplated your answer until you ultimately.. relented.

"There was a.. cute bunny.."

Another few seconds of silence.

"....PFFT!"

"Argh, I knew you were going to laugh!" you complained, puffing your cheeks into a pout.

He merely smiled in return, a few chuckles slipping through as he placed his hands behind his back.

"OFF FOLLOWING THE WHITE RABBIT TO WONDERLAND, WERE YOU?" he mused with a grin. "SHOULD I GIVE CHESHIRE A CALL AND SEE IF HE MIGHT ACCOMPANY YOU ON YOUR TRIP?"

"How about you let me out of this net before calling him?"

"HMM. I SUPPOSE I SHOULD, BUT I DO FEEL LIKE THERE'S A LESSON TO BE LEARNED HERE.."

"Something about not following rabbits, I presume?"

"MORE LIKE NOT WANDERING THIS FAR OUT INTO THE GARDENS," he stated rather simply.

His expression turned a bit more serious, his browbone tensing in concern.

"IT'S DANGEROUS OUT HERE."

...You.. couldn't really argue that, could you.

Both of the brothers had warned you several times over how potentially dangerous it could be wandering on your own so far away from the house. In all honesty you were just trying to get a cute photo of a bunny as it hopped through the garden, which is why your phone laid on the ground below you.

"I'm sorry," you said gently.

He seemed contemplative for a moment, but at the very least didn't seem angry or anything. Just worried.

....

...Oh wait...

Oh no.

That damn mischievous twinkle was back in his socket.

"APOLOGY ACCEPTED MY DEAREST," he hummed, approaching the net and grasping on to it so you could thankfully stop spinning.

Thank goodness, you were starting to feel a little woozy.

"NOW TELL ME, WHAT GIFTS WILL THIS BEAUTIFUL PRINCESS BESTOW UPON THEIR CHIVALROUS PRINCE ONCE HE FREES THEM FROM CAPTIVITY?"

"....My gratitude?" you said with a grin.

"ALWAYS APPRECIATED, BUT.. IS THAT REALLY ENOUGH...?"

You gave Sans a very pointed stare that he easily matched with a charismatic smile.

Well.. it's not like you didn't want to kiss him.

You actually liked kissing him..

A lot.

He just always seemed to have you on the defense!

It's like you'd forget how to speak, leaving you a stuttery blushy mess every time you broached this subject and you weren't one to get flustered easily! He just always seemed to know how to hit your weak spots...

It was frustrating..

You didn't want to give in.. but..

He was just so dang cute!

".....And... maybe... a kiss?"

Sure enough the sly bastard seemed more than pleased with that.

"CONSIDER YOURSELF RESCUED MY LOVE," he said with a wink, making you pout once more as a flush overtook your cheeks.

Dammit, you'd have to think of a way to get him back for this..

You watched as Sans headed over to a nearby tree and carefully ran a hand near the base until there was an audible click, making you freefall for a second before the net caught you again.

"Eek!"

He laughed once more.

"IT'S ALRIGHT DEAR, YOU WON'T FALL. I WAS JUST RELEASING THE LOCK."

A small frustrated groan left your lips as he meandered back over, a smirk all over his dumb, stupid, cute face.

"NOW LET ME JUST PULL YOU DOWN.."

But you were tired of waiting.

Tired of always getting so dang flustered by this cute skeleton and his cute, dastardly schemes..!

You could rescue yoursel-!

"Ah-!"

"DEARES-!"

....

Ow.

Okay, maaaaybe you should've heeded Sans' advice and actually descended slowly so you would've not..

....

Not uh...

.....

You stared down at Sans' face as he laid underneath you, having served as a very uncomfortable landing pad to your untimely descent. Both of your hands were on either side of his head, having caught yourself from landing too harshly on top of him, but what was catching your eye the most right now was the shade of blue creeping across his skull as he stared up at you.

He looked.. flustered.

.....

"Still want that kiss, lover boy?” you hummed, watching as that blue deepened on his cheeks.

“T-THIS..!”

You waited like a good, patient Princess for your adorable Prince to find his words.

“....THIS IS UNFAIR.”

“All’s fair in love and war,” you retorted, leaning down to plant a kiss on the top of his skull… and you were sure to give him a few extras just to make sure your debt was paid in full.

check out my other writings | feel free to drop me a ko-fi!

[alsamara]

75 Hard

Day 4:January 5,2024

[X] Selfie

[X] Read 10 Pages

[X] Outdoor Work out (45 Mins)

[] Indoor Workout (45 mins)

[X] Drink a Gallon of Water

[X] Eat Desired Diet/NO alch

Am: Protein smoothie

Lunch: left over salmon and veggies

Dinner: Turkey lettuce roll ups with a balsamic vinaigrette and herbs

Thoughts + Feelings

There was such a depleted feeling in my body yesterday which I tend to feel after deep healings.. so I think the PEMF directed a lot of my cellular energy to healing certain areas I’m not even aware of and left me feeling very low for physical activities. So I just went with the flow of everything and an indoor work out felt like I was pushing it. I didn’t want to feel overly exhausted on my bday.. which btw is today (I’m writing this late cause I was so exhausted yesterday I forgot) but my point being. I woke up feeling WEIRD. Like lost my voice, I actually was stumbling around and couldn’t open my eyes fully. I looked drunk I’m sure of it. BUT ANYWAYS ILL SAVE THE REST FOR TODAYS POST.

bye now!

Alyssa

[rae-gar-targaryen]

“...The eternity we've been given is not enough," Druig's thumb that was resting along your jaw is now pressed into the plush of your lower lip, which he drags lightly down, his eyes following the movement. "For I could never have enough time with you.”

Moodboard for “amor fati” made by the incomprarable @ouralcohol​