#alan harper

[filmesbrazil]

[bed-wed-behead-your-fave]

Alan Harper from Two and a Half Men

[zeroandvoid]

✨ Alan Harper moodboard ✨

[bow-tie-of-darkness]

I finished Two and a Half Men and the amount of queerbaiting with Alan and Walden is off the charts, it's almost impressing.

[ache-me-nas-estrelas]

[eddysocs]

In Good Hands — Charlie Harper x Alan Harper x OC

Summary: While staying at Charlie's while she has a cold, Tessa gets the ultimate relaxation treatment from Charlie and Alan.

Word Count: 628

Warnings: Vague insinuation towards sex

Tessa had been crashing at Charlie’s house for a few days now. She wasn’t feeling well, and despite her protests, Charlie, wanting to make a good impression, had insisted she stay until she felt better. It was an offer Tessa couldn’t refuse, considering the cozy Malibu beach house and the company of both Charlie and Alan, who always knew how to make her laugh.

She lay sprawled out on the couch in the living room, a blanket pulled up to her chin. Her eyes were closed, trying to block out the headache that had been gnawing at her all day.

Alan wandered into the room, concern etched on his face when he saw how in pain she looked. “How are you holding up, Tessa?”

Tessa let out a heavy sigh, wishing this illness would just go away. “My body is one big ache,” she told him.

Alan frowned, sitting down at the edge of the couch. “Maybe you should see a doctor.”

Charlie sauntered into the room, a smirk on his face as he heard Tessa’s words. “Or,” he drawled, leaning against the wall with that familiar cocky grin, “I’ve got another solution that might help.”

Tessa opened one eye to look at him, already knowing where this was going. “Charlie…”

He shrugged, completely unfazed by her exasperation. “Hey, it’s a proven method. Endorphins, oxytocin, you name it. A little… exercise might be just what the doctor ordered.”

Alan rolled his eyes, shifting closer to Tessa and ignoring Charlie’s usual antics. “Or,” he said, “we could try something less… invasive. How about a massage?”

Tessa’s eyebrows raised slightly. “A massage?”

“Yeah,” Alan said, a little too eager. “I’ve picked up a few tricks over the years. You’d be surprised how good I am.”

Charlie snorted. “You actually believe that?”

Ignoring his brother, Alan gently took Tessa’s hand, his expression softening. “Come on, Tessa. Let me help you feel better. Just relax.”

Tessa hesitated but eventually nodded, too exhausted to argue. “Okay… but no funny business.”

“Scout’s honor,” Alan said with a small smile.

She cast the blanket aside for the time being and turned onto her stomach, adjusting the pillow beneath her head. Alan started with her feet, his hands surprisingly gentle as he worked through the tension.

“You are actually good at this,” Tessa murmured, surprised.

“See? Told you,” Alan said, a hint of pride in his voice.

Charlie watched them from the side, his smirk fading slightly as he realized he was being left out. He wasn’t one to back down, especially when he could tell Tessa was starting to relax under Alan’s touch. Without a word, he moved over to the couch and knelt down beside her head, his hands finding her shoulders.

“Can’t let Alan have all the fun,” Charlie muttered, starting to work his own brand of magic on her tense shoulders.

Tessa sighed softly, sinking further into the couch as both brothers worked together, surprisingly in sync. The combination of Alan’s meticulous attention to detail at her feet and legs combined with Charlie’s dexterous hands on her shoulders started to melt the aches away little by little, leaving her in a state of contented relaxation.

“This… this isn’t so bad,” Tessa admitted, her voice softening as the tension drained from her body.

“Not bad at all,” Alan agreed, his focus shifting now from her feet to her calves.

Charlie grinned, his hands still skillfully kneading out the knots in her shoulders. “See? Told you I had a solution.”

Tessa couldn’t help but chuckle, the sound muffled by the pillow. “You’re both insufferable.”

“Maybe,” Alan said, smiling, “but at least we’re helping.”

Charlie leaned down, whispering into Tessa’s ear with a playful tone, “Don’t worry, Tessa. You’re in good hands.” And she was.

For @sicktember

Forever Tag: @baubeautyandthegeek, @kmc1989, @curious-kittens-ocs, @fanficanatic-tw, @gcthvile, @kenjioharashotspot, @immyowndefender

[gedankenkaputt]

"Es gibt keine tollen Neuigkeiten und es gibt keine Aussicht auf Hoffnung. Und kein Lichtstreif am Horizont, sondern nur diese Hölle auf Erden, und das lange Warten auf die süße Erlösung des Todes"

-Alan Harper, Two and a half Men

[fandomlife-confessions]

[coffeebookslovegt]

-El alcohol es veneno.

-Y si es veneno ¿por qué lo bebes?

-Porque hay cosas dentro de mí que quiero matar.

[blueeyedbesson]

How did anyone like Charlie? He's not good looking, is extremely selfish and he's a womanizer

Alan was a way better person, albeit awkward as fuck. But it was endearing to watch him struggle with women.

[hitchell-mope]

Of course it’s a colonoscopy.

[filmesbrazil]

[incorrect-green-lantern-quotes]

Ollie has definitely made it his mission to make all of the Green Lanterns of Earth try his infamously spicy chili. The GLs in turn have made it a tradition to not warn each new member of their group before they eat it for the first time.

Hal: complains about the spice level all the time but has developed a tolerance after years of friendship with Ollie

Guy: dies every time but is too stubborn to admit defeat, even as his face turns the same color as his hair

John: genuinely enjoys the stuff and asked Ollie for the recipe to share with his mom

Kyle: tried it once and thought he was going to die, will make any excuse to avoid eating it again. Roy and Connor give him so much shit for this

Simon: can handle the heat without any trouble, he just doesn't like chili in general

Jessica: doesn't think it's spicy enough and will dump extra hot sauce on top. Lian is in awe

Jo: unbothered by the spice but told Ollie that it tasted burnt

I think your time on the island fucked up your taste buds Ollie

[yuriinadress]

DC Pride 2023 #1 pin-up by Brandt & Stein - "Youth Center"

[oocdc-tweets]

Gotham Polls

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[thatsbelievable]

Not only were these two books an unforgettable part of my childhood, but they heavily influenced the writing of The Monstrous Adventures of Mummy Man and Waffles!

Movie Monsters by Alan Ormsby offers a glimpse at each of the classic movie monsters like Dracula, the Wolfman, and (of course) the Mummy. This is followed by illustrated pages that teach you how to do your own monster makeup. There’s even a script for a monster play you can perform with friends!

Meanwhile, How to Care For Your Monster by Norman Bridwell gives you pointers on exactly that, so you can make your very own vampire, Frankenstein Monster, werewolf, or mummy happy.

As a kid, I loved these books to death. As an adult, I still do. They made me who I am, and I’m happy to do my part in keeping the love of monsters alive.

If you or someone in your life enjoys monsters, spooky stuff, goofy humor, and fun, please give The Monstrous Adventures of Mummy Man and Waffles a try. You can order it by clicking on the book title here, or ask for it at your local library!