#ah new big baby... gotta come up with a real good name for U

[orcelito]

ok so i finished writing the prolog for my time travel au fic. it's 1.8k words, & i dont wanna make it any longer bc it has One Goal of setting up the fic's premise, & it does that pretty solidly

i have yet to edit it but im looking into titles now. god, it's some pressure coming up with a new fic's title, ESPECIALLY if it's smth you're planning to keep up with long-term

[gerrymike]

OK. commentary on my satg playlist. For reasons

lol it wont let me hyperlink but. https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0w9pMZtOvP0plqdxT665q7?si=wEFnvdh3Rjaa0p2UX251mQ&dl_branch=1 Plug

1. PIEDMONT (DESTROY BOYS)

Looks like I'm late for the party Everyone knows the attire but me Glass walls separate us Catch a glimpse into different books On different shelves

i.e. teen crisis where u want desperately to live the same life as ppl on the street but also can’t imagine anything worse

2. SWEET ADELINE (ELLIOTT SMITH)

It's a picture-perfect evening and I'm staring down the sun Fully loaded, deaf and dumb and done Waiting for sedation to disconnect my head Or any situation where I'm better off than dead

i.e. she’s alive! is that worse or better. also jfc, you fucking hate hospitals

3. ALAMEDA (ELLIOTT SMITH)

You walk down Alameda  Shuffling your deck of trick cards over everyone Like some precious only son Face down, bow to the champion

also

Walk down Alameda  Brushing off the nightmares you wish Could plague me when I'm awake And now you see your first mistake  Was thinking that you could relate For one or two minutes she liked you But the fix is in

i.e. oops it’s two elliotts in a row, sorry. just. about the connection you can form with someone given just a short period of time, and how sometimes it gets ruined by, like, a werewolf. pretty similar to sweet adeline. mx weisglass gets two songs. plus “precious only son” 😬 “shuffling your deck of trick cards” 😬

4. CAN I PLAY WITH MADNESS (IRON MAIDEN)

Give me the sense to wonder To wonder if I'm free Give me a sense of wonder To know I can be me Give me the strength to hold my head up Spit back in their face

i.e. for Me mostly because i think the whiplash from elliott to maiden is kinda funny. also the gerry VS twisty animosity, in over-the-top wizardy terms. sometimes you are full of hate and that’s OK 😬 

5. ICU (PHOEBE BRIDGERS)

If you're a work of art I'm standing too close I can see the brush strokes I hate your mom I hate it when she opens her mouth It's amazing to me How much you can say When you don't know  What you're talking about

and

I'll climb through the window again But right now it feels good not to stand Then I'll leave it wide open Let the dystopian morning light pour in

i.e. we’re back in london…and, well, yeah. also, song title! we’re still in sacramento, actually, spiritually, at this point in the story

6. CRY FOR JUDAS (THE MOUNTAIN GOATS)

Feel the storm every night Hope it passes by Hallucinate a shady grove where Judas went to die Unfurl the black velvet altar cloth Draw a white chalk Baphomet Mistreat your altar boys long enough and this is what you get

i.e. crew. i think about him

7. IRIS (THE GOO GOO DOLLS)

And all I can taste is this moment And all I can breathe is your life And sooner or later, it's over I just don't wanna miss you tonight

plus

And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am

i.e. OK. OK. OK. yeah, OK. damn right all you can taste is this moment…yeah OK. SONGS5

8. KILL ALL YOUR FRIENDS (MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE)

It's been 8 bitter years since I've been seeing your face And you're walking away And I will die in this place

to

It's been 10 fucking years since I've been seeing your face round here And you're walking away And I will drown in the fear

i.e. ah…the lyrical differences in the chorus…yes…also i love how raucous this song is despite what it’s about. it’s got satg energy!!! “seeing your face”, of course, is not literal 😬

9. ENCHANTING GHOST (SUFJAN STEVENS)

Don't carry on carrying efforts, oh no, oh oh oh oh Somewhere there's a room for each of us to grow And if it pleases you to leave me, just go, oh oh oh oh Stopping you would stifle your enchanting ghost

and

Did you cut your hands on me? Are my edges sharp? Am I a pest to feed?

i.e. 😬😬😬

10. PAUL (BIG THIEF)

In the blossom of the months I was sure that I'd get driven off with thought So I swallowed all of it As I realized there was no one  Who could kiss away my shit

and PARTICULARLY

Well Paul, I know you said That you'd take me any way I came or went But I'll push you from my brain See, you're gentle baby I couldn't stay, I'd only bring you pain

i.e. HARROWING TERRITORY!!!

11. PITSELEH (ELLIOTT SMITH)

I'll tell you why I Don't wanna know where you are I gotta joke I've been dying to tell you

i.e. sorry. a lot of elliott smith on this playlist. thems the breaks

12. OPHELIA (THE LUMINEERS)

Oh, Ophelia You've been on my mind girl like a drug Oh, Ophelia Heaven help a fool who falls in love

i.e. callbacks to SONGS5…! and more pain

13. CLOUDS (BORNS)

I forget all my dreams I forget everyones name I meet I forget about time and space But I can't stop thinking 'bout your face

i.e. tfw your memory’s shit and also you just threw yourself into the sky and you’re still not over it. yowch!

14. ARCADE (DUNCAN LAWRENCE)

Oh, oh-oh-oh oh Oh, oh-oh-oh, oh All I know, all I know Loving you is a losing game

i.e. sorry i heard this song first in a c#tradora edit and i have never recovered.

15. WARS (OF MONSTERS AND MEN)

Yeah, I love you on the weekends But I'm careless and I'm wicked Yeah, I love you on the weekends It's a cruel war I still have pieces of you stuck on me Pieces of you stuck on me Yeah, I love you on the weekends It's a cruel war

i.e. PIECES OF YOU STUCK ON ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is the only song of the new omam i’ve heard. i never got around to listening to it. but this one slaps

16. MONTERO (LIL NAS X)

Lookin' at the table, all I see is weed and white Baby, you livin' the life, but baby, you ain't livin' right Cocaine and drinkin' with your friends You live in the dark, boy, I cannot pretend

AND

A sign of the times every time that I speak A dime and a nine, it was mine every week What a time, an incline, God was shinin' on me Now I can't leave And now I'm actin' hella elite

AND ESPECIALLY

I want that jet lag from fuckin' and flyin'

i.e. God i love this song. re: avatarhood. YOU CAN’T LEAVE!!! not saying it’s like being a celebrity, but it’s like being a celebrity. dual perspectives here with G + his morality regarding the person he loves being, uh, evil? (you live in the dark / i cannot pretend) and M + debt he owes to his god, erosion of his own morals. also, SHEER F*CKING VIBES

17. GEYSER (MITSKI)

You're my number one You're the one I want And you've turned down Every hand that has beckoned me to come

i.e. love songs that serve double as to your god and to your lover

18. THAT’S WHAT I LIKE (BRUNO MARS)

Jump in the Cadillac (Girl, let's put some miles on it) Anything you want (Just to put a smile on it) You deserve it baby, you deserve it all

i.e. this song is here because i say so. a real “sorry it’s been seven years let me make it up to you” vibe

19. RUN AWAY WITH ME (SUFJAN STEVENS)

And I say, love Come run away with me Sweet, falling remedy Come run away with me

i.e. more grand ridiculous propositions. more to come. but they’re born out of a real frustration with the situation at hand! it sucks! also, “falling remedy”,

20. LET’S GET MARRIED (BLEACHERS)

I'm gonna get right for you, honey I'll take all of my medicine, spend you all my money, yeah I know it's hard enough to love me But I woke up in a safe house singing, "Honey, let's get married"

i.e. bro.

21. I WILL (MITSKI)

And while you sleep I'll be scared So by the time you wake I'll be brave

i.e. a lot of these here are self explanatory..

22. ME & MY DOG (BOYGENIUS)

I had a fever Until I met you Now you make me cool

also

I never said I'd be all right Just thought I could hold myself together But I couldn't breathe, I went outside Don't know why I thought it'd be any better I'm fine now, it doesn't matter

i.e. title is significant. and yeah. just. recovery’s tricky

23. I FOUND (AMBER RUN)

And I've moved further than I thought I could But I missed you more than I thought I would

i.e. this is like a staple song for like. basically. any pairing. but i’m pathetic and it gets me every time. there’s something about it. not sure if i’m going to leave it on this playlist but. hm. yeah

OK that’s a wrap. highly likely i’ll put more songs on this as i go

[bregee13]

A New Home WIP

Here's what I wrote of this so far. There is a LOT l have yet to write. So much so, that I've been debating on splitting this up in to multiple parts.

Also this story is part of a long series of stories I already wrote, so context is important in order to understand what's going on. You can read what I've written so far here.

But if that's way too long (I don't blame you), here's a TLDR: There was a Raposa family living in Rapoville that comprised of a mom (Nixie), a dad (Bob), a son (Hunter), and a daughter (Polly). Hunter for a while was secretly going to the twilite woods on his own. Polly eventually found out Hunter's secret, and threatened to tell on him if he didn't let her go with him through the forest gate to see the twilite woods. When the two went into the twilite woods, a flyin rabbit doll attacked Polly and cursed her into making a flyin rabbit doll (which she named Bongo). After a big argument between Hunter and Polly, Hunter ran to the twilite woods. But the darkness around Rapoville was getting worse, and ended up trapping Hunter in the forest gate region (he's fine, he'll go on to live with the Baki there. Nobody knows that though). Nobody knows where Hunter was except Polly, and she was extremely guilty about it. She tried to enter the darkness to try rescuing him, but was caught by Cricket. But when she noticed she dropped Bongo right next to the expanding wall of darkness, she ran up to get it (risking her life in the process, which resulted in Bongo absorbing a lot of loving energy). But Cricket managed to save her from the darkness. Eventually the darkness gets so bad that Polly and her parents are forced to move out of the village (via the bridge).

This story picks up with them moving through the snow gate region into the forest gate region, and them having to deal with a new temporary home. Also a bunch of other stuff, especially Bongo stuff, but I didn't get to that part yet. 😭

The actual WIP is under the read more.

It wasn't before long until the Raposa family wandered into the snowy fields. At first the snow barely dusted the grass beneath their feet, but eventually the snow became almost knee deep. It was a good thing Polly thought of bringing blankets with them. Even then, the three wished they had the time to change into warmer clothing.

Polly, while squeezing her dad's arm for support, shivered uncontrollably. "D-dad??? Why did-didn't we u-use the S-snow G-gate...?"

Nixie, who was also freezing, couldn't help but glare at her husband. "That's a g-good question, Polly! Bobby, why DIDN'T we use the snow g-gate?"

"Nghh..." 'How's this my fault? Movin dis way was YOUR idea...' As much as Bob wanted to say it out loud, he was much too tired to butt heads. Besides, after trudging through the snow for that long, you almost HAD to blame somebody. Though, if he didn't say anything, Nixie would freeze him to death before any snow could. "Well, if we w-went through the snow gate, we could've walked right i-into darkness. A-and dat wouldn't be fun, would it?"

Nixie, who was starting to remember her plan, felt her cheeks flush a little more than they already were. Though embarrassed, she welcomed the extra warmth on her face.

"B-but.... Why did-didn't we go to th-the dock?? A-and r-ride a boat somewhere?" Polly asked, hoping asking more questions would distract her from the cold.

Her mother shook her head. "N-no... We couldn't have done that. The d-darkness might've covered the dock by then..."

"M-might've!?! Y-you didn't k-know?!"

"I...I... Um... f-figured there wouldn't be any more boats sailing to and from there anyway... With all this darkness, of course... Of course...."

"Th... That... s-sounds..." Polly tried to call her mom out on her poor excuse, but she was just too frozen to speak.

"Dat sounds like a c-cra... crummy excuse, N-Nix.."

Nixie turned her head toward Bob in confusion. "Wh...what? Are you saying, Bobby?"

Bob stared off into the distance. He longed to go back home and sleep in the warmth of his bed, but he knew that was impossible. "D-dere was no h-harm in checkin first... Ya k-knew dere was a chance of esc-cape dere.... W-what the Rapo stopped ya...?"

"Oh... U-um... You know, um..." 'Well, you didn't bother to check either! Why blame me...?' It took a moment for Nixie to regain some of her composure. She knew she was the only one planning anything out, and that Bob likely didn't even think of checking the docks in the heat of the moment. She actually thought about leaving the village by boat many times. But the one thing that stopped her every time was her fear. "...E-even if there was a way.... Th-there's no way to know what to expect... The o-other villages might be worse off than where we w-were.... There's no way... There's no way...." While she did fear the darkness in other villages, she did have one other small fear that she was afraid to admit. She was scared of returning to her parents after going missing for so long. 'Only Creator knows how those two would react...'

"...Y-ya got a point.... I haven't h-heard from Jack in a real long time... H-Hope he and the folks are alright in Lavasteam... N-nice.... hot..... L-Lavasteam...." 'Rapo... This snow is messin with our heads n' makin us lookin all ridiculous!'

Bob looked back toward Polly. She hadn't spoken for a while now, which was odd for her. On top of that, she was moving at a snail's pace, slowing everyone down as a result. "Polly? Ya doin okay?"

"..." Polly, shaking rapidly, fully relied on her father's arm for support. She had a hard time gathering her words and saying them out loud. She felt horrible. "D-dad....." She cried. "I...I can't feel my legs......."

"Dat can't be good.... Hang on..." Bob walked up to Nixie and handed her the clothes he was carrying. "Hold dis for a s-sec?"

"O-oh... Of... Of course..."

Bob then proceeded to lift Polly off the ground, and carry her in his arms. "Urk!" 'She's heavier than I remember!' "It's okay... you're o-okay... Y-you you're gonna be okay, okay?" He tried to reassure her, but it only seemed to make everything worse. 'Oh Creator, she's real cold....' As worried as Bob was, he knew he couldn't show too much concern. For all he knew, it would just jinx everything. "...Y-Ya got uhh... Um... Bangle with ya? Ah! I..! I m-meant...! B....Bon...Go?"

Polly, squeezing her stuffed friend in her arms, didn't even bother to correct her dad. Though the fact that he caught the mistake on his own really meant a lot to her. "Mhmm..."

"G-good. Dat's good... "

Nixie took the clothes that were handed to her and covered her daughter with them as if they were extra blankets. "There. H-hope that will help s-somehow..."

"Th-thank thank you..."

The three silently continued on their journey through the snow. The bitter wind brushed their cheeks. Eventually, the snow began to die down, and the air was less stiff. The knee-high snow turned into mere frost. Needless to say, everyone was relieved. The ice life is NOT a nice life.

The wide open snow fields slowly turned into a chilly forest. The trees were of a purplish hue and had seemingly no end to them. It was clear that they had entered the forest gate region.

Bob, now getting tired of carrying her around, set Polly down by one of the many trees. "There ya go. Are ya feelin any better?"

Polly slowly nodded. "Y-yeah."

Nixie leaned down to feel Polly's arm. "She's still really cold..." She turned to her husband. "What should we do now?"

Bob looked up at the sky. It wouldn't be too long before it grew dark. "We gotta get some shelter. Can't rest out in da open..."

"Where are we going to find this shelter, anyhow?"

"We're gon have to build it from scratch... Don't expect nothin fancy, I don't got no tools to work with."

"That's fine... But..." She looked down at Polly before returning her gaze to Bob. "Are you going to be alright by yourself?"

Bob tried to reassure her with a smile. "I'll be good on my own. Don't worry bout me. Just worry bout her."

"...Okay. Just be back soon."

"I will." Bob stepped back from his family and got to work.

Now, Bob may be a carpenter, but he wasn't exactly experienced in wilderness survival. Lucky for the three Raposa, he managed to put a small shelter together out of branches and leaves. And for the restrictions he had, it was relatively spacious. Just big enough for everyone to lay in comfortably.

Nixie had Polly wrapped up in her arms. "How are you feeling, baby? Are you warmer now?"

Polly yawned. "Yeah. I'm okay. I think Bongo's a little tired though. Are you tired, Bongo?"

"..."

"Yeah... He's pretty tired..." Polly's eyes had grown heavy from the exhausting journey she had been through.

Nixie, who was tired as well, softly chuckled to herself. "It seems that you're tired too. How about we get ready for bedtime?"

"Yeah… Okay." Polly stretched.

"Are you well enough to get up on your own?"

"I think so..." Polly slowly started to get up off of the ground. Although her legs were a little wobbly from sitting too long.

Nixie reached out for her daughter in an attempt to stable her. "Are you alright?!"

"I'm okay! I'm okay! My legs are just sleepy."

"Come on, I'll help you over there." Nixie had her arm wrapped around Polly's body, helping to guide her to the makeshift home Bob had made. "Bobby! Is the shelter finished over there?"

Bob looked back at his wife, and sighed. "It's 'bout as done as it's gonna get... Hope it works just fine."

"It looks wonderful. Why don't you take a break and get some rest? It's been quite a long day."

"It is gettin pretty late, huh? Alright. I'll take a breather."

"That's what I wanted to hear! Besides, a good sleep in there will make the perfect test for the structure you made."

"That's true..."

Polly pulled her mother's arm toward the shelter. She was starting to get cranky from a lack of sleep. "Mooom... C'mon! We gotta go to bed! Bongo's really really tired!"

"Alright, Polly! Settle down! We're on our way. Why don't you go on ahead and get ready for dreamland?" Nixie suggested.

"Okay..." Polly yawned. "G'night...." She squeezed Bongo in her arms, and stepped inside.

Nixie glanced at her husband. "We should follow her."

Bob nodded. "Yeah, I guess we should..."

The two stepped inside the structure. The dirt floor was covered in a bedding of grass and leaves, which in turn was covered by the largest blanket they had brought. It was cozy to say the least.

Polly was already laying down, curled up underneath her very own blanket. She held onto her doll as tightly as she could. Her eyes were shut. As far as Nixie and Bob could tell, she was already fast asleep.

“She looks so peaceful…” Nixie whispered.

“Dat didn’t take very long at all, huh?”

“That journey must have drained all of the energy from her. I don’t believe I blame her.”

“Poor Polly… I sure hope all dat snow didn’t leave her sick…”

“I hope so too. She didn’t seem to be all that ill, just tired. ...I have faith that she’ll turn out alright.”

Bob sighed. “Rapo, what’d we do to deserve any of this? We lost nearly everythin, and now we gotta live in this… this… whatever this is!”

“You’re the one who built the shack… I don’t see why you’re the one complaining.” Nixie mumbled.

“...What was that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing. It doesn’t mean anything. It’s fine.” Nixie clearly sounded annoyed. “It’s not a permanent solution, anyhow… We’re not staying too long.”

“...Are you insulting my work?”

“Bobby, please.”

“No no, I get it. I understand! I don’t wanna live here either! Who da Rapo would? In fact, it’s so awful dat any normal Raposa would rather sleep outside on the dirt and die!”

“We may as well be…” Nixie muttered.

“Excuse me?! I worked real hard to set this up! All by myself with no tools, no help of any kind, and you’re talkin to me like that?! A lil while ago, you said it was fantastic. I worked the best that I could under these circumstances, and now you’re mad it ain’t good enough?!”

“Bobby, you know that isn’t what I meant.”

“Really? What else could you have meant by that?! I don’t understand anything you’re saying, Nix! First you said one thing, then you say the opposite? I don’t understand at all...” Bob crossed his arms and hung his head low. His eyes were starting to water in frustration. “...Explain to me, Nix. What’s wrong? What’d I do wrong? What the Rapo did I do to you to make you insult me like dat?!”

“Rapo, you didn’t do anything! Nothing is wrong! Why would you come to the conclusion that everything is your fault?! What the Rapo do you even think you did?”

“I-I dunno… I was just askin you that! Ya can’t just say ‘nothin is wrong’ right after complaining your rear off to me!”

“Well maybe I’m just feeling a little peeved.”

“Peeved?!”

“Of course I’m peeved! I didn’t want this! I didn’t want to be forced out of my home, I didn’t want to have to worry about whether or not we’ll make it out of this okay, and I surely didn’t want you to yell at me!”

“Yell at ya?! Nix, you’re da one dat started it!”

“Bobby, what the Rapo are you talking about? I didn’t start anything! You just got mad at me out of nowhere!”

“Out of- What?! I-I would never do dat to you! I would never yell or get mad at you for no reason!”

“Then why are you yelling at me right now then?”

“B-because... I’m mad because you insulted me!” He began to cry. “I’m mad because you decided to be mean at me for no reason! I’m mad… because I don’t understand why you would do that…”

“Bobby?”

“That… that really hurt, Nix… Why would you go and do that?”

“Bobby… I… I’m so sorry.” She gently lifted his chin up so she could see his face better. “I’m sorry.”

Bob looked at her and sniffled. “I don’t understand, Nix. I-I know it ain’t the best I’ve done, but you ain’t gotta be mean about it…”

“I wasn’t trying to be mean to you… I… I was just frustrated. And I ended up saying the wrong thing… I know that wasn’t right for me to snap like that, but… I’m sorry…”

“I know you’re sorry… I know you’re just stressed out. Dat just… really got to me for some reason. I-I’m sorry I overreacted.”

“Bobby… You didn’t overreact. It’s okay. It’s my fault for upsetting you.” She sighed. “We’re both just... frazzled from all of this. I understand.”

“...I forgive ya Nix. I know ya didn’t mean what you said.” He faintly smiled for a moment. “But… Dere’s somethin I don’t understand. Why’d ya say it looked good earlier? I don’t get it.”

“...You want me to be honest? I... was trying to be polite. I didn’t want something like this to happen. Especially not in front of Polly. ...Wait a minute. Polly!” She turned around to face Polly, hoping that she was fast asleep and didn’t hear anything they said.

Polly, who was watching the entire time, hid under her blanket once she got caught. ‘Rapo! She saw me!’ She then pretended to be sleeping, hoping that she wasn’t in trouble.

Nixie sighed and turned back to her husband. “We really need to pull ourselves together, don’t we?”

Bob nodded. “If I were her, I wouldn’t want my folks arguing over nothin… I’d want em to be happy. I’d wanna be sure that it’s all gonna be okay. ...We gotta do better for her.”

“You’re right. From now on, we have to stay positive. No matter what happens.”

“Of course. We gotta set an example. It’s what Polly deserves. It’s what Hunter deserves too.”

“...Yeah.”

“...I wonder if Hunter’s doin alright. Maybe… Maybe he’s alive somehow?”

“I don’t want to talk about Hunter...”

“Alright, I understand.”

The two stood there for a moment in awkward silence.

[plump-lips-imagine]

Osomatsu x Reader: Have The Patience To Bake, So That You Get The Perfect Cake (1/?)

* Hey Guys! This is my first Osomatsu-san fic. To celebrate the coming of season 3, I wanted to start practicing my consistency in writing by starting off here, and hopefully Ill grow from here, and then i could do some imagines. Let’s see! Hope you enjoy.**

You don’t really know how you ended up in this situation.

You were currently holding a man on top of you on the side of the street, but he seemed to be passed out as a stream of blood was leaving his nose. The blood staining your shirt wasn’t really bothering but he was really heavy on top of you and considering the situation, you needed to get this man some help!

You decided too quickly grab your phone and call the emergency hotline, and quickly recall all that happened that led you to this predicament in the first place.

- Some Time Earlier -

“I’ll be there in about 20 minuets, Sato-san. We can get some ice cream and discuss scheduling then......Great! See you then! Thank you again!”

*BEEP*

It was a sunny day in Akatsuka, and the streets were busy with people. Several conversations filled the air as the ray of the sun hit your heads. Some cats even made their way into the streets to join the crowd. It was a normal day. Nothing stood out too much in the area. A few fast food joints, small markets, a pachinko parlor here or there. It was something you could get used to living here after just recently moving here. The area was quite cute in its own way.

You continued onward, thinking of the possibilities here as your bakery was doing well with its recent opening. The future was looking bri-

“HOLY SH**, WATCH OUT!”

You body suddenly moved on its own as you ran up to the man wearing a red hoodie. He seemed to notice you screaming at him, his head looking over  his shoulder, but you had already tackled him to the ground with a *Thud*.

“OOF!”

“OucH!”

*SCrEE*

 You heard the car break to a halt,but you couldn’t see what else was happening because the guy’s hair took over your vision.The tackle caused the two of you to roll on the pavement. This ended up with you ultimately ending up with your back on the ground while he seemed to be tensed up as his face was directly into your chest.

“Sir, are you okay!?”

He said nothing but just blankly stared at your chest that he was still pushed up against. You sat yourself up a bit......his face still in your chest.

“...Sir?”

“...boobs.”

“Huh?”

“Boobs.”

You couldn’t help but look dumbfounded at him as he just shamelessly said “boobs” to you twice. TWICE. Without hesitation. Does he have no shame?!

“Too much...Too close...for a virgin-” Next thing you knew, blood started to flow out of his nose, staining your shirt, and then he fell limp in your lap.

“Oh. Oh dear.”

And that’s how you ended up where you were now. Looks like you’ll have to call Sato again. You're gonna be a little late.

*****

Sigh. Well. Today was interesting. Good thing this was on your day or else this would've been a whole lot more stressful. At least the sunset was looking good.

Admiring the sun saying it's  goodbye for today, you strolled outside to explore a little bit. It was gonna take more than a little near death experience and a weird guy to leave your curiosity astray. But....Although you hate to admit it..he was kinda cute.

In a weird way. You did kinda hope he was alright.

Walking along the bridge water stream, you spot a kart-wagon in your vision. A food stand maybe? You could eat.

“Uh...Good Evening?”

“Good Evening! You came to try the world’s best oden!”

“Oden? I never had it before. Is it good?”

“Of course it is, idjit! How can you not try it?! You’re lucky you found the best spot to try it!”

“Well then, I guess I’ll have a seat then!” You don’t know what, but the spirit this dude has in his oden actually makes you wanna try some. You were beyond hungry anyway.

Taking your seat, he makes a small plate. you take a bite as he anticipates your judgement.

“It’s delicious!”

“Of course it is! There was no doubt about it!”

“More Please”

Ha Ha. Flattery won’t get you nowhere.” But apparently it did get you somewhere because he gave you an even bigger plate of oden.

“Thank You!”

“Ehhh? Who are you?”

A new voice made you jump as you weren’t aware of the person sitting next to you on the other side. You could tell by his face that he was clearly drinking. A lot of it too be exact. His face was flushed with a bright red and his eyes were struggling to stay up....wake a minute.

“Hey! It’s you! You're that guy from earlier!”

“Ehhhhhhhhhh?” He sits up a bit to get a better look at you. “EH?! BOOB GIRL!?”

“WHO YOU CALLIN’ BOOB GIRL!? WHAT KIND OF NAME IS THAT?!” Does this guy have no shame?!

“How was I supposed to know? Why’d you suddenly attack me like that anyway? I know I’m hit and everything but you can’t attack a virgin like that You almost killed me!”

Sir-

“I almost killed you?! YOU ALMOST KILLED YOURSELF! What were you thinking walking into ongoing traffic like that!? That’s why I pushed you!”

“......I did? I think I would’ve remembered if I-.”

“You.Did.” You took down a swing of water before you looked back at his drunken stupor. “Look.What were you doing exactly before you went into traffic?”

“I was a pachinko parlor!” He exclaimed with a big grin.

“Uh-huh,and did you win anything?” He seemed to flinch at the question. He was looking anywhere that wasn't your eyes and rubbed the back of his head.

Bingo.

“Ah. You were so disappointed in all that loss of cash that you didn’t even notice a car coming straight for you.”  

An non-existent arrow hit him in the back of the head, as he put his head down in shame.

‘Ah, so he does have a little bit of shame.’

“I’ll win next time!” He said with a dumb grin on his face, holding up a thumbs up. 'I WAS WRONG! NO SHAME!'

The Cart Owner just stared at the scene in front of him, crossed his arms and sighed.

“Hey, Lady. I wouldn’t really talk to this guy if I were you. Talking with him and knowing his existence can only bring trouble.” The food cart owner stated.

“Huh!? Chibita! That’s so cruel~. I thought we were friends.”

“Who the hell said you were my friend,you damn idjit!?”

“So mean~! You're starting to sound like Totty. Stop being so mean! It’s bad enough I get it from my brothers!”

"Chibita,huh?” Another drink from your cup, you turned back to the drunken man.

“What’s your name, if you don’t mind me asking?”

He straightened up a little and rubbed his nose, winking at you and pointing to himself. “I’m Matsuno Osomatsu! But you can me Osomatsu, Cute Savior~!”

“Okay, Osomatsu. I’m (L/n) (Y/n), but for you, You can just call me (Y/n).” You decided to playfully flirt back, winking at him in the process. He stared at you blankly again, then his face started turning red, with more blood pulling out of his nose.

“ACK!Another surprise attack! Now you're definitely trying to kill me!”

“What the hell!?” You quickly grabbed his nose and plunged them. “ Tip your head forward and breath from the mouth.” He did what you told him. “Gently now.”

a few seconds later, his nose stopped bleeding.

“There, all better. Now......How did that happen!?”

“It’s your fault! Doing something like that a virgin NEET is a low blow. I might explode,Y’know!?”

“First Off, that shouldn't be possible.Secondly, I know no man that openly states he’s a virgin and a NEET so casually.So shameless yet so brave.”

“So Brave that you wanna date me!”

“No.”

Whaaaaat? Man, the world is so unfair. Even a NEETr like me needs love too. Someone cute needs to take my virginity.....Akatsuka-sensei here my.....prayers.....zzzzzzz..” Osomatsu face plants onto the table, loud snoring.

“He fell asleep?!”

“Tch. Lousy NEET always gets himself from paying his tab. I outta stop serving him. “ Chibita obviously knew the guy too well to look at him so nonchalantly. But still, this isn’t something a normal person will get used too. Wait-.

You look around and see that it was already dark. ‘So late, I gotta get ready for tomorrow.’ You stand up and give the money you owed. “Thank you for the meal, I'll be sure to come back again, Chibita-san.” You look over to Osomatsu. “What are you going to do about him?”

“Eh, I’ll just leave him. This isn’t the first time this happened. He’ll survive, he’s like a parasite.”

Even if what he said is true. It still feels...

You walked over to Osomatsu and draped his arm over your shoulder. “Chibita-san, do you know where he lives? I’ll be able to take him home.”

“HUh?! Well,yeah, but are you sure? There’s no real need to bring him home.”

“Don’t worry. I got time. Plus I think it’ll be easier for you. I’ll bring him home.”

****

And here you were,dragging Osomatsu home with the address Chibita gave you. He was pretty heavy over your shoulder. It didn’t help that he was drooling on your shoulder, and was in and out of consciousness. He was awake enough to talk.

“You smell good~~, can I touch your boobs?”

“No.”

“Pretty Please~~. I already had my face in your boobs, what’s a little grab?”

“No.”

“C’mon~~, I wanna! You're so sexy! Your chest is just begging to be grabbed!”

“Osomatsu-san, I am this close to throwing you in the river.” You emphasize by putting your fingers close together.

“You being angry is so hot. It does things to a guy.”

Sigh. You're almost there. Just drop him off and then you can’t finally sleep.

.....

“KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS. STOP POKING M-”

****

The Matsuno household.You made it. The house was pretty out of place with the rest of the building but it was cute.

You gently place Osomatsu on the ground, he was finally knocked out. Which was because of your help. He currently had a knot on the side of his head. This Jerk.

Looking over him, he was pretty peaceful even in the current state he was in. He was sucking his thumb and snoring loudly. Not a care in the world.

“He’s like a child. A man baby.” At least he has a cute face so it wouldn’t make it as bad. Sighing, you decided to grab some loose paper and a pen from your purse. Just in case. You never know. HE may be a bit of a jerk, but he was cute in a weird way.

You put your number inside his hoodie, hopefully he’ll notice. Knocking on the residents’ door, you took your leave for tomorrow. You have a busy day tomorrow.

[lucarioisinthevoid]

Twitch Streamer AU???

(I planned on pushing out a FEW AU asks, but then realized I don’t even have so many. There’s going to be a FNAC event, but that will be an event, not a specific AU ask, so- I guess this is it! Very cursed AU, thank you very much Anon Small warning for mentions of blood, I think? Nothing too bad.)

Streamers, youtubers, content creators. Some people are all of these, some people are none, and some are just one- because each of them needed a very different talent. Those who could do seemingly everything were few and far between- And they ruled the entertainment scene! Thankfully though, the main three as most called them, were also always out for new content to watch. Thus they boosted those that they saw potential in. With some taking the boost and then going off to do their own thing- And some becoming good friends. It always started with a letter. Mike had the habit to do things on stream, as long as no personal details were not visible on them. He used a false email which he regularly changed, and he generally kept himself as safe as possible. Opening emails on stream could be rather fun, even if it was a risk. Sometimes it encouraged people to send bad things- So to prevent the worst, nothing would be downloaded and all emails containing images would be put into the spam bin. Better safe than sorry, the internet was full of terrible people. This day so far had been successful. And by successful it meant that Mike was SCREAMING. “I HATE SUPER MEAT BOY. I WILL COMMIT VIOLENCE AGAINST MEAT IN A MINUTE. I HAVE A BIG F-CKING STEAK IN THE KITCHEN, AND I WILL THROW IT AGAINST THE F_CKING WALL. I WILL GET A HAMMER.” The chat was going wild, cheering. The chat’s phrase of today was “tender Mikey” and it didn’t help at all. “I DID. NOT. HIT THAT! I DID NOT!” A donation popped up, with a robotic voice. ‘Oh hai Mark!’ “NOT FUNNY! NOT F-CKING FUNNY. I’M SUFFERING HERE AND ALL OF YOU SUPPORT IT. YOU’RE ALL F-CKING MONSTERS HERE, I HOPE YOU KNOW THAT. AND I’M NOT F-CKING TENDERIZING THE MEAT WHEN I SLAP IT AROUND, I’LL RIP IT INTO PIECES AND CONSUME IT RAW!” Standing up, he genuinely went to get it- And fifteen minute later he had slightly calmed down, his hands and room slightly bloody. The chat was still celebrating and donating- another thing that never failed to make Mike BEG them to stop and use the money for something GOOD and SENSIBLE, LIKE THEM-FUCKING-SELF- but he had gotten out most of the energy. “Alright. Alright everyone. ENOUGH. I gotta stop you HERE. It’s email time.”   A celebratory jingle played, as Mike booted up the website, opening the inbox. Memes, storytime, I’m-not-fucking-reading-that-and-you-know-it, and- One of the emails caught his- and the chat’s- attention, however. Sender: Fazbear Entertainment Topic: Challenge Needless to say- once again the chat was out of control and this time there was NOTHING Mike could do to stop them. After opening the email, Mike slowly took a deep breath and looked into the camera, between concerned and honored- But that wouldn’t be enough to rip him from his carefully maintained persona. So he audible scoffed- albeit him being unable to hide an excited grin. “Alright bitches and bastards in the audience- we’re firing SuperMeatBoy up again. You won’t be catching ME losing to a pink son of a bitch anytime soon!” After the letter- provided it was accepted and responded to, the production happened. The deal was that a teaser was dropped on the big channel- The entire video itself was put on the smaller one, attracting the viewers over and hopefully make them more likely to want to see the other works the creator had put out. It was a win-win overall, the big channel being able to vary their content, testing the water for new things- and the smaller channel getting a boost and a lot of tips from very experienced creators. Henry and Dave were very generous people. Jeremy was sitting there, taking deep breaths, trying to stay calm. So far, everyone seemed to be rather kind, even if Jeremy was basically a complete nobody. Hell, he never wanted to be anybody. He just wanted to stream himself baking, for those who never had someone baking with them. Because baking could feel stressful, especially when you were missing ingredients or- many reasons, actually. Not only baking, but cooking too- Sometimes playing games on request, but not much in terms of requests ever came in. And now he was here in an actual studio, soon to be seen by an insane amount of people. A cooking competition. Sounded silly- you couldn’t really FIGHT in something like that… But… Henry and Dave had promised it would be fun. And they were nice. With and without the cameras rolling. Speaking off- There they were, approaching, their assistant coming along. He wore a weird phone-head, to ensure his privacy. Or something. It was kinda weird, but he had just accepted the answer he got. “Why, there you are, Jeremy! Would you like to see the equipment we have prepared?” Henry warmly asked, reaching down with his hand to help his guest stand up. “We have gotten a few extra things, just in case.” As they entered the studio, Jeremy’s invisible eyes went WIDE. “Woah- that looks really nice! I love it here! This is high quality stuff-!” “Fantastic!” Pleased Henry opened his arms in his typical theatrical manner- Before being abruptly interrupted by Dave jumping in, halfway over Henry’s shoulder. “ARE YA READY TO GO!? CAMERAS ARE READY!” “Ah- I- I guess- but-“ “YOU HEARD HIM, BOYS! GET IT ROLLIN’!” “W-wait, I don’t even have-“ “Everyone! Welcome to NOTHIN’ AT ALL!” Henry swiftly fitted in, continuing on with the intro. “Todays challenger is the man, the legend, the baker and occasional chef- Jeremy from Baking With Jeremy!” “Wait, what- that’s seriously your channel name, pal?” A bit offended Jeremy looked into the eyes of the people behind the camera. “U-uh- you guys here- I mean- he has literally called his channel Henry Miller! I- uhm- I-“ Snickering Henry put a hand on his guest’s shoulder. “You are very right about that. Say, are you nervous about losing?” “… n-no. I mean- maybe a little. This place here is big and very professional and I’m not used to many people looking at me…” Taking a deep breath, he gave off a nervous smile for the audience. “… yet, I know- it’s a good thing! And as long as everyone has fun, everything will work out!” “Awwwww, look at him!” Dave said, pleased. “You’re so right! We’ll be havin’ fun!” “But also, I will win.” Henry pointed out. “That is when I have the most fun.” Slightly playful Jeremy smiled. “K-keep that attitude, that will make it even easier to blindside you!” Simon whistled, clearly bemused as he held the camera in place- And Henry smirked. “Sure. Anyhow, the stakes are-“ “Steaks? We’re makin’ steaks? I thought we planned on-“ “Dave. I swear to god.” Henry looked at him from the side, before shaking his head. “What is on the line is easy to see- we have roughly an hour to cook the best meal. If Jeremy wins, we will donate 5000 to a charity of his choice!” “And if the young pal loses, he’ll be joinin’ our channel!” Dave chirped. This was news to the brown-haired boy. “W-wait, we never agreed to that-“ “GET TO YOUR STATIONS!” Someone in the back announced. “WHO’S TODAYS FAVORITE?” Simon checked the stream. “The chat says Jeremy is a clear winner. Nobody trusts Henry to keep his two braincells together for long enough to not forget the salt or something.” “Excuse?!” Not only Henry was APPALLED by the chat, Dave joined right in. “Ya guys have NO taste. I’ll be clearly winnin’… but hey, maybe ya peeps don’t know that I plan to cheat!” Surprised Jerry looked over to Dave’s cooking station. “How… how can you cheat at cooking-“ Before he could finish his sentence, he shrieked as Dave pulled out a flamethrower. “HELL YEAH BABY, I AIN’T WAITING 30 MINUTES FOR SOMETHING TO COOK IN THE OVEN, I’LL BE DONE IN FIFTEEN MINUTES MAX!” “W-WAIT THAT DOESN’T SEEM SAVE-“ Henry just raised his hands, cheerful. “Ready… set…” The Phone Guy made eye- well, rotary- contact with Jeremy, slightly raising a fire extinguisher that was by his side. … alright, it seemed the people here were well-prepared for this scenario. So instead he focused on the ingredients in front of him. Almost manic, Henry’s voice rang. “GO!” And… … that was it! Some joined, with amazing results- Mike rubbed his face. “Who thought that was a great idea. I fucking hate this.” Dave next to him on the couch just grinned. “It’s amazin’ what these websites all offer to sell. You won’t be BELIEVIN’ what’s in this box!” “I’M NOT OPENING IT.” “YOU WILL. OTHERWISE IT’LL HUNT YOUR DREAMS. I’LL PUT THIS BOX NEXT TO YOUR BED. YOUR TOILET. ONTO YOUR DINNER TABLE. INTO THE FRIDGE. I’LL ORDER MORE OF THESE BOXES.” “Jesus CHRIST, calm DOWN-“ “I WILL FIGHT YA TO THE DEATH OLD PAL-“ - and some people just went back to the usual pattern, with the occasional raid from Fazbear Entertainment. They asked first, of course. Each of them fulfilled their own niche, each of them had caught Henry’s and Dave’s attention in one way or another. Henry and Dave however- Well, Dave was the varied creator. Henry liked his niche. He played horror, investigated ARGs, read stories about real and fictional crimes against humanity. The world was a terrible place, wasn’t it? Yet he reveled in it. Aside from that he showed extra effects, he built machines and thought everyone one or another thing about creating special effects at home. From dry ice to genuinely ridiculous chain-reactions, Henry showed them it all. Blood too, multiple forms of it, depending on how and where it would be used. Sometimes breaking it off with more light-hearted one-off games and listening to what his community wanted to see… but the most comfortable he was with horror and analysis. He was a youtuber, a streamer, a content creator… … and one thing more. It wasn’t easy to find the code. But his intended audience were a very small amount of people. A small number of strangers. There was no way to know if anyone ever made it to more than one show, but Henry did not care. It wasn’t for them that he did this. Him and William moved down, down below the set, into the lowest regions of the house. The workshop. Nobody really question why you added what to your home if you were a creative person. Even less so if you were a famous, eccentric creator. Yes, the free reign was what he REALLY loved about his job. Maybe he should build his studio somewhere else- But like this it was so much more thrilling! Wordlessly both of them put on their suits. It would hide their identity perfectly- especially the animal heads that contorted their voices a bit. Enough. Today’s participant wore a mask too- another phone head, differently made, different style, but to hide their identity too. However, the voice was in no way muffled. Panicked the person dragged on the chains keeping them attached to the chair. “H-HELLO!? HELLO!? S-SOMEONE- IS SOMEONE HERE!?” A noisy one! Delightful! Both Fredbear and Springbonnie stepped out of the shadows, one form each side. While Springbonnie put his hands gently on the shoulders of the whimpering person, Fredbear stepped in front of the camera, bowing. “Ladies and gentlemen-“ The low voice sounded more like the one of an animal than from a person. Yet it was smooth and comforting. “- I welcome you to yet another installment of our show. I am Fredbear, and over there is my wonderful assistant, Springbonnie. Today we have brought a simple stranger, a nobody who might not even be missed. Thusly I encourage you to truly be creative with your ideas. And while your votes roll in, maybe I point out that next time we will have another little game-show, with quite the effects. We might even get a real bull! You will not want to miss it.” The board above the camera blinked up, as a bitter fight of votes started, everyone wanting to see something else. Three tiers to vote on! Foreplay (light injuries), main course (heavy injury leading to death) and of course what to do with the body. Below it was a little measure for “face reveal”. Some of their viewers really enjoyed seeing the expressions during and after. It came with a risk to Fredbear and Springbonnie, as the victim being recognizable meant their general area of activity was more obvious- thus it was incredibly expensive. They knew there was every now and again law enforcement mixed up between the genuine watchers. It was thrilling too- Yet Fredbear wanted to keep this game alive as long as he could. Thus it was important to hide what they could. Fredbear was a creator first and foremost, an entertainer second- And there was nothing that attracted an HONEST, an UNRESTRAINED, a PURE audience quite like violence. Once blood spilled, humans degraded and it was wonderful. Behind him, the victim began rattling even more erratic. “WHAT- WHAT IS THIS?! LET ME OUT- PLEASE- LET ME OUT- PLEASE- I- DIDN’T DO ANYTHING-“ Burying his hands into the shoulders of Springbonnie downright cackled, enjoying the mania that always accumulated in these situation. “Be still, new friend! The audience HATES too much whining, y’know? And at least you could die with your tongue still intact, wouldn’t that be nicer than having to swallow the thing? Once it almost killed someone, boy, that sure was a bother!” His voice was changed to a cartoonish, upbeat pitch- “While the votes come in, how about we quiz today’s friend… maybe if you are smart enough, they will want you to live! It happened before… o n c e.” Fredbear took out a long scalpel, the face a morbid grimace. “Surprise us!”

[waitineedaname]

For the request thing Dirk and Roxy in some supernatural AU if you feeling it! Congrats on the follower count, too, dude!

this took FOREVER to finish simply bc I had Too Many ideas, but I’m super happy with how this turned out

—-

“You know, there’s no evidence that ghosts are real.”

“Mhm.”

“Sure, there’s- fuck,” Dirk paused to avoid tripping over a root cutting across his path before continuing, “There’s plenty of folklore. Anecdotal accounts. But there’s nothing scientific to back it up. If ghosts were real, wouldn’t scientists have caught one to test on yet?”

“That doesn’t sound very humane, though.” Roxy countered, shining their flashlight on another root so Dirk wouldn’t trip. “Testin’ on them, I mean! They’re still people. Shouldn’t they have the same rights and stuff?”

“They’re ghosts. It’s not like they’re going to die again.”

“How do you know? Maybe that’s what we’re testing them for!” Roxy flashed the beam of light onto Dirk’s face briefly, laughing a little when he made a face at them. “Look, would you want a bunch of scientists pokin’ around at your ghost when you die?”

“First of all, when I die, I’m going to be cold, unconscious, and rotting. Or hot, unconscious, and dusty if I get cremated. Either way, I’m not going to be a ghost. But-” He added when he saw Roxy’s silhouette gear up to speak, “If I was a ghost, I would be happy to let scientists do whatever the fuck they want. Test the hell out of my incorporeal form. Go hogwild in the name of science. I don’t give a shit.”

Roxy hummed and shrugged. “I mean, yeah, mood. There’s still gotta be consent forms and shit, though. I’m the one that works in a lab that involves people here. I know my shit.”

“That still doesn’t change my point though.”

“Which was…?”

“That ghosts aren’t real.”

“Ah. Yeah.” Roxy glanced down at the map on their phone, making sure the two of them were still headed in the right direction. “Yeah, they probably aren’t.”

“Then why the fuck are we exploring a haunted house?”

“Because it’s fun, dummy. Get in the spirit of the season! Eat some pumpkins! Wear a sweater! Fuck a ghost!”

“The spirit of the season.” Dirk’s voice was flat as he tried to think of a joke to make off of the obvious pun there before the rest of what Roxy said caught up to him. “Please tell me there won’t be any ghost fucking involved here. I mean, had I known that, I would’ve at least brought a condom. Worn something nice. Put on some cologne.”

“As if.” Roxy laughed. “Do you own any cologne? Axe does not count.”

“No comment.”

“You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were nervous, Di Stri.” Roxy teased, giving him a side eye. Dirk’s expression was carefully neutral.

“Good thing you know better. Do I look nervous to you? The answer is hell no. I’m cool as a cucumber riding a private jet ski into the sunset. I don’t get nervous.” His mouth twitched at Roxy’s failure to contain a snort. “No, I’m just not looking forward to freezing my ass off a mile away from where we parked the car in a shitty abandoned building that’s going to give me mesothelioma. Do you want to be the one asking for financial compensation when I get mesothelioma? I don’t think so.”

“You’re such a big baby.” Roxy muttered, laughing softly. “I think we’re here.”

They stepped out into a clearing and shined their flashlights on the decaying building in front of him. It looked so cartoonishly like a haunted house that Dirk almost wanted to laugh. He shivered instead, hugging his jacket tighter around himself. Roxy bounced on their heels beside him and all but bounded up to the crumbling porch. It took some maneuvering to get up the stairs without falling through wood that had seen better days, but it seemed that all of a sudden that they were both staring down the door handle. 

“Do you want to do the honors?” Roxy asked. Dirk almost protested that this wasn’t his idea, why should he do the honors, but there was a telltale waver of anxiety finally catching up to them in Roxy’s voice, so he bit it back. The metal of the handle was cold to the touch, and hinges creaked dramatically when he pulled it open. Dirk did a little flourish with his flashlight and pretending to bow, hoping the humor would sooth Roxy’s nerves. 

“After you.” He said. Roxy giggled a little.

“Oh, wow, such a gentleman. My prince.” They cooed, walking through the doorway. Dirk followed close behind. Yeah, he wasn’t looking forward to anything this haunted house had to offer, but like hell was he going to let Roxy out of his sight.

As soon as they were both inside, the door slammed shut behind them and their flashlights flickered out. Roxy let out a tiny “eep!” and Dirk tensed.

“Dirk?” Roxy called out into the pitch black.

“I’m right here.” They sounded close, and in a moment, he felt Roxy’s hand slip into his. He squeezed it gently. 

“The flashlight batteries are brand new, they shouldn’t be going out like this…” Roxy mumbled, and Dirk heard a noise that sounded a lot like they were thwacking their flashlight on their thigh. “Aha!” The flashlight flickered back to life. After a few seconds of fumbling, Dirk managed to turn his back on too.

The room they illuminated was… surprisingly mundane, all things considered. A moth-eaten couch, a layer of dust thicker than the rug laying in the middle of the floor, peeling wallpaper that had seen better days. It kind of just looked like an abandoned house, nothing particularly out of the ordinary. The only thing that really set it apart was that-

“Jesus, it’s colder than Satan’s left nut in here.” Roxy said, shivering.

“You can say that again.”

“Jesus, it’s colder th-”

“Rox.” Dirk gave them a look, and Roxy giggled nervously again.

“Come on, let’s explore.” They said, tugging him in the direction of one of the doorways. It led them into a modest kitchen, similarly covered in a thick layer of dust. The cabinets were all empty except for one - also empty - box of Bisquick and a startled rat. Dirk most definitely did not shout in surprise when it squeaked at him, and Roxy didn’t laugh so hard they nearly cried, thank you very much.

The laundry room was also empty, and so was the office they poked their heads into, except for a piano that sat against the wall in surprisingly good condition. First floor exhausted, Roxy put a hand on their hip and grinned at Dirk, their confidence bolstered by the lack of spooky happenings beyond the door.

“Ready to go upstairs?”

“There’s no possible way saying ‘no’ will work, will it?”

“Dirk,” Roxy’s expression softened gently, “If you wanna leave, we can.”

“…Nah, I’m good.” Dirk bonked his shoulder against Roxy’s. “If we end up breaking our legs on an unstable set of stairs, though, don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Roxy laughed. “You warned me about the stairs, bro.”

“I told you dog.” Dirk added emphatically. Roxy took the lead up the stairs, which creaked uncomfortably underneath them, but otherwise held steady. Atop the landing, only one door was open, albeit only slightly. They pushed it open and found themselves in a tidy bedroom. The bed was neatly made and covered with cobwebs, and the posters on the wall were too dusty and bleached with age to reveal what they originally were. Moonlight trickled in through the open window, painting the room an eerie blue. 

The pair poked around curiously, though Dirk expected it to be just as barren as the rooms downstairs. He stepped closer to the wall to investigate the posters, and his blood ran cold.

“Uh, Roxy?” He called them over, taking a step back from the wall. There was something dripping from it.

“The fuck?” Roxy said at Dirk’s side. “Wait… is that slime?”

“If we get slimered, I’m going to be so fucking mad.” Of all the ways to die, that would definitely be pretty high on Dirk’s list of ‘dumbest ways to beef it.’ The goopy green slime started forming shapes on the wall. 

6 6 6

“Oh, great.” Dirk said, trying to hold back the urge to bolt. “It’s a satanic Slimer.” Roxy frowned next to him, then looked around. They bounced over to the desk and Dirk gave them a bewildered look. “The fuck are you-”

“Aha!” Roxy withdrew a lonesome sharpie from one of the desk drawers and bounded back over to the dripping wall. Before Dirk could stop them, they drew their own dark shapes beside the numbers.

6 9 6 9 6 9

“You have got to be kidding me.” Dirk stared the wall, Roxy grinning at their handiwork. Another set of letters started appearing.

h a h a  n i c e .

Roxy brightened even further and wheeled around to face Dirk. “What do you say? Ready to be paranormal investigators?”

Dirk glanced at where the slime was spelling out w h o  y o u  g o n n a  c a and sighed. “I guess we’re the ghostbusters now. They are us.”

“Fuck yeah!” Roxy cheered.

f u c k  y e a h !

[therainroguefanfiction]

⁂ Hero (NCT Dreamies)

Genre: Comedy, Fluff, Friendship ☁

Word Count: 2,041 ☁

Pairing: Reader, Dreamies ☁

World: NCT Dream ☁

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

You’ve been working for SM Entertainment for the past five years and you absolutely hated it. Having friends that worked at other companies made you realize early on that SM was a horrible company to work for. All they cared about was money. They treated their employees like trash and, in turn, the employees treated the idols like trash.

The foreign idols had it the hardest, in your opinion. Although it wasn’t technically a rule that the members had to speak Korean when they were doing shows or vlives, the managers were never happy when they didn’t.

To you, it seemed like the more money SM earned, the more they stopped caring that the idols were human beings, not machines. You were one hundred percent ready to leave the company and go work for a better company, like JYP. But you weren’t a quitter and you kept telling yourself to give it some more time, which eventually turned into years of time.

Finally, you set a time limit for yourself. You would stay with the company for one more month and if nothing changed, you would finally move on.

The next day, you were assigned to help manage one of NCT’s sub-units. They were called Dream and it was a group of seven boys all under the age of eighteen. You had already met the oldest member of the group, Mark, as he had debuted in a different unit. To your understanding, he was meant to debut in every single unit, which was just insane to you.

SM fully intended to work that child like a dog until he broke in half and it made you sick to your stomach. It was then that you came to the realization – this was your sign not to quit your job.

That night, you met up with your best friend, Seunghoon, who managed the group Got7. With everything on your mind, you ended up having a bit too much to drink, but it helped you make up your mind on what you needed to do.

“I’ll become a hero and protect the Dreamies from the evil of this world!”

“Ma’am, please don’t stand on the table, you’re disturbing the other customers…”

“Ah, I’m so sorr – ” Your apology died when you lost your balance and collided face first with the ground.

Seunghoon had to apologize to the owners before carrying your drunk ass away.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

Despite the hangover and the painful throbbing of your nose, you went to work the next morning filled with determination.

The Dreamies’ parents put their faith in the company to watch over and protect their children and you’d be damned if you let that faith go to waste!

Maya, the current assistant manager, brought you over to where the boys were getting their hair and makeup done for their MV shooting. “Boys, this is Y/N. She’ll be taking over for me when I move on to NCT U. Be on your best behavior for her, okay?”

They chorused their agreement before taking turns hugging her, seeming sad that she was leaving them. You realized that you had big shoes to fill.

She smiled brightly at you, “Don’t worry! I leave them in your capable hands.”

Swallowing down your nerves, you watched as she walked away. Kids had never been your strong suit in life and standing in front of seven teenagers made you feel older than you actually were. You cleared your throat, trying to sound as confident as possible. “Hello! My name is Y/N and I’ll be taking care of you from now on. Let’s get along!”

You were pleasantly surprised when they smiled and greeted you politely. You listened carefully as they introduced themselves, finding yourself smiling at how adorable and innocent they are. Suddenly, the years of SM hell seemed worth it.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

“Noona~” Chenle pouted, resting his head on your shoulder. “Can we go get ice cream after our interview?”

“Of course~!” You patted his head when he hugged you as thanks.

“There’s a new game that just came out,” Jisung scratched his cheek, shyly. “Can we… maybe go check it out?”

“We can stop by on the way to the ice cream shop. I’ll buy you a copy.”

“Really? Thank you so much, noona!”

Haechan waddled over cutely, showing you a finger heart to win you over. “Noona~ Can I get the new Air Jordans that just came out? They’d look amazing in our new music video!”

“Go ahead and order them.”

“Yes!”

Jaemin shook his head as he sat on the couch beside you. “Don’t you think you’re spoiling them too much, noona?”

“Nope,” you grinned, happily. “I ordered you some new headphones, by the way. They should arrive tomorrow!”

“How did you – ” he followed your gaze to Haechan and sighed, “Should’ve known.” He then offered you a thankful smile. “I appreciate it, thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Nana.” You ruffled his hair, feeling your heart flutter with happiness. Since you had been an only child growing up, working for Dream was like having a bunch of adorable baby brothers to spoil and make happy.

“You’re late!”

Hearing the manager yell, you looked up. He was pretty angry, that obnoxious vein popping out on his forehead. In front of him stood Mark, breathing heavy as he bowed his head in apology. He was upset, but not because he was being scolded – it was because he had taken so long to arrive. Rather than resting after his schedule with NCT U, he had rushed over to practice with Dream, only to get screamed at for his efforts.

You stood up and approached them, resting your arm around the boy’s shoulders. As much as you wanted to scream and insult the man, you had to keep your job if you wanted to protect the boys. Clearing your throat, you put on your best fake smile. “With all due respect, sir, perhaps we should let Mark rest instead of scolding him. He’s working very hard!”

“Not hard enough!” He bit back, turning his glare to you. “And you have no say in this. You work for me, so your opinions mean nothing. Don’t forget your place, Y/N.”

Your grip tightened as anger coursed through you, making Mark look up at you with concern. Even so, your smile never faltered. “Of course, sir. My apologies!”

When the manager walked away, Mark turned to you with a grateful smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Thank you for standing up for me, but… I don’t want you to get into trouble.”

‘This kid can’t be real’, you rested your hands on his shoulders and your smile turned genuine. “I’m an adult, dear, you don’t have to worry about me. As your noona, it’s my job to protect you. You work harder than anyone I know and I’m very proud of you, Mark.”

This time the smile did reach his eyes.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

You threw yourself onto the wooden chair angrily, eyes burning with determination. Seunghoon looked over at you with a raised brow.

“Sometimes, in order to beat the evil you’re facing, you must become evil itself.”

“Did you grab a drink on your way here?”

You slammed your hand on the table. “Miss, one mug of beer, please!”

“Coming right up!”

By this point, he had become convinced that SM had stripped you of the small bit of sanity you had left. How bad were things there that you were talking about heroes and evil? “Whatever you’re planning, I don’t want to know. Just… don’t get arrested, I don’t have the money to bail you out.” You gave him an enthusiastic thumbs up and he sighed. “I’m going to the bathroom.” He headed to the back, internally questioning why he was friends with you. It was bad enough that he had to deal with Got7’s crazy antics, but he also had to deal with yours. Seunghoon definitely was not getting paid enough for this.

Deciding to use this time to put your plan into action, you pulled out your phone and called up your old compadre, Lucile.

– “Hello?”

“Luci! I need a favor.”

– He scoffed, “It’s been three years and I don’t even get a ‘hi’?”

“Hi, Lucile! Long time no speak! How ya been, buddy? Good? Great! I need a favor.”

– He sighed deeply, “What can I do for you, noona?”

“Glad you asked! I need you to find some dirt on someone.”

– “Oh? Are you reverting to your old self?”

“Only a little bit… but it’s for the greater good this time!”

– He hummed, “Name?”

“Chul Kim,”

– “Consider it done.”

“As payment, you can come over and spend time with Mittens~”

– “…”

“…you already do, don’t you?! You broke into my apartment, you little shit?!”

– “Gotta get to work, bye noona~”

“Oi, don’t you dare – ” click. “Son of a – ”

Seunghoon slowly sat back down, trying to ignore the last bit of the conversation, but it worried him. Despite himself, he questioned, “Should I be worried about someone breaking into your apartment?”

“Yes,” you answered, confidently. “The evil is strong, Seunghoonie.”

He sighed once again, convinced that you were, in fact, insane.

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

You were sitting in the waiting room with the Dreamies, impatiently checking your phone. Lucile was taking his sweet time to deliver the dirt you requested and you were starting to feel anxious. Although you did your best to hide it, intuitive little Jaemin noticed.

He took the seat next to you, playing on his phone. “What’s wrong, noona?”

“Nothing! Everything is perfectly fine~”

He deadpanned, knowing that you were lying. “Noona…”

You changed the subject, “Let me ask you something, Nana. You have to answer honestly, okay?”

Jaemin nodded, putting his phone into his pocket as he turned to give you his full attention.

“Do you like your manager?”

His body tensed at the question and he immediately looked away, glancing at Mark. “He… does his best.”

You hummed at his answer, getting all of the information you needed.

The door swung open and Mark rushed inside, breathing heavily. Their manager glared at him, ordering him to hurry up and change. You felt your anxiety growing as you scowled at your phone, ‘Luci, so help me, if you don’t hurry up you’re never gonna see Mittens!’

As if hearing your thoughts, your phone vibrated as Lucile sent various pictures and snippets of information. You quickly scrolled through it, feeling your lips tug up. This was absolutely perfect!

When the Dreamies went on stage, you approached the manager, tapping his shoulder. He glared at you, demanding to know why you were bothering him. You smiled brightly, showing him one of the pictures. His eyes widened and he grabbed you, his voice harsh and low.

“Where the hell did you get that?!”

“I have my sources~”

“What do you want?”, he growled.

“From now on, I’m in charge. If you even think about being rude to those boys, I’ll make sure every media outlet sees these pictures. You’ll be ruined – no one will ever give you a chance!” You grinned, feeling satisfied as he grew angrier. “The Dreamies deserve the world, and you’re going to give it to them. From now on, you – ” you pointed your index finger at his face. “ – will be their slave!”

“That’s ridiculous! I would never stoop so low.”

“Okay, then~” You pulled up your e-mail, getting ready to send the pictures.

“No, wait! Stop!” He grabbed your wrist, looking desperate. “Fine, fine!”

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

The next few weeks were wonderful. Their manager was treating them like kings and he stopped scolding Mark, instead praising him for working so hard. Everyone noticed the change, but only Jaemin realized that you had something to do with it.

You sat off to the side, watching the manager bringing bottles of water to the boys after they finished practice. You felt proud of yourself and you were even tempted to return to your old ways because of how amazing it felt.

The couch dipped as Jaemin settled in beside you, leaning his head on your shoulder.

“You did a good job, Nana.” You pulled him into a hug, patting his head.

“Thank you, noona… for everything.”

You tilted your head to the side and he smiled brightly.

“You’re our hero~”

━━━━━━༻🌧️༺━━━━━━

📜 Read more by checking out my masterlist 📜

[internetremix]

If you guys could be any non Legendary Pokemon, what would you be and why?

2This one ended up VERY LONG so discussion below the cut:

Kristen: Um. Oh no this is hard. My kneejerk reaction to these is always Mew because Mew is my favorite Pokemon. Smol kickass pink cat, excellent.Phill: Bidoof. Easy. Hands down objectively best PokemonKristen: I'm just imagining Bidoof with a Phill beard now. Amazing. BUT I CANNOT PICK A LEGENDARY POKEMON SO. Uh.  Um. I mean Charizard is super cool and then I could be a big badass dragon but like I CAN'T BE A BIG?? THAT WOULD BE HARD I'd probably be super clumsy and burn shit. ...So I also can't be Fletchling cause then I'm also gonna burn shit on accident. Dragonair is super neat but like THEY LONG I feel like I'd get tangled up. Espeon and Umbreon are cool?? Uh maybe an Espeon?? They seem too cool for me.  I'm bad at this, I haven't played Pokemon in like a million years and I get self conscious every time I pick something cool cause I'm like "no I'd fuck up being cool". Slyveon maybe?? My fiance just said I'd be a Plusle but I don't accept it.

...fuck it Espeon. Espeon is neat but also it cute fuck it live ur dreams to be kinda cool.Atwas: It's okay Kristen. Charizard is only 5'7". But I guess even that would be a massive jump in height. :^)Kristen: ListenAtwas: :^)Kristen: RudeUprising: idk what i would BE, i know my favorite pokemon but thats chepap. my brother said shiny alolan ninetails bc it is pink, white, and has flowy hair so that sounds accurate.Alex: My favorite pokemon is magikarp but i would probably be exploudKristen: And now I'm just imagining Magikarp with Alex's hair.Jojo: ugh. why do you have to ask me this. now I have to get out my list of literally every pokemon... Either Eevee, Dratini, or Chatot. OR RIOLU! riolu is a goodie. I have  a feeling Scott would be a Buneary but that's not my place to say.Kristen: Good choices JoojJojo: /);w;(\Split: Kristens a torchic that never evolves lmaoKristen: NO ...maybe.Jojo: I actually thought about it. I have the perfect pokemon for youKristen: ...alright, hit me.Alex: Ok.

Kristen: OW! Alex why? ;A;Alex: You said hit me.Split: PffffhahahaJojo:  #742, Cutiefly.

Kristen: ...I mean. It is smol and blonde, which I currently am.Split: Yep. It you. Congrats.Kristen: SIGH I mean. It’s very cute.Jojo: By the way I think that’s it’s actual size.Split: LMAOJojo: OH MY GOD IT’S LITERALLY KRISTEN

Kristen: NOSplit: I call being the trainer of this band of misfitsKristen: I’M SMOL BUT NOT THAT SMOL!Jojo: You are that smol.Split: Joj shes like an inch or two shorter than youJojo: NO?? SHE’S LIKEKristen: HA!Jojo: SHH! THAT’S NOT TRUEKristen: IT’S TOTALLY TRUEAlex: "The wild Kristen eats approximately ten times her body weight each day"Split: If only.Jojo: ohmygodkristenI found your other one

Kristen: NOSplit: Joj that ones youKristen: He's right it's smol and blueAlex: yeah that's youJojo:  NO IM A RIOLUSplit: Which one was thatAlex: babby lucarioJojo: That boy

Split: But are you sureJojo: YES THAT'S MEKristen: Why do you get to be the cool oneAlex: i still think dratini is best choice for jojKristen: I agree.Split: Are you baby martial artist or baby huggy bearJojo: I AM STRONG YOU FUCKAlex: huggy bear it isSplit: But do you fightJojo: YESSplit: BullshitJojo:  DUKE UP YOU CHEEKY POPPETSplit: AightKristen: I can't believe Jooj is a huggy bearJojo: NoOooOo IM DRATINISplit: Thats the snake one right? The long blue dragon snake.Alex: 

Jojo: yeSplit: Oh yuh thats also joj. I still think huggy bear but ill settle for dratini.Jojo: even looks like my fursona holy shitSplit: Secrets outJojo: MOTHERFUCKER YOU HUUGGY BEAR. it's not really a secret anymoreSplit: It never wasssssKristen: I can't believe Jojo gets to be a fucking dragon and I'm a tiny fly that eats 10 times its bodyweight. Oh it's bug/fairy. I guess that's interesting.Jojo: hehehefairyAlex: real talk i based it on the math that an average human eats 2.5 kg of cooked food per dayKristen: Huh, interestingSplit: We gave you so many options other than the .4 inch bug thing kristenKristen: ....I mean I can see Cutiefly, Fletching or Torchick tbhJojo: OH MY GOD LOOK AT THIS ABSOLUTE UNIT

HIS NAME. IS BUZZSWOLE.Kristen: lmao that looks like a Digimon. Is that real?Walrus: He is real. And he will punch your spirit.Kristen: SOUNDS FAKE BUT OKAlex: you question the might of our lord and savior buzzwoleJojo: no he'll punch everything and then literally use your spirit as a sweat rag! LOOK AT THIS FUCKIN JOJO ASS CHARACTER!Split: It took me a whole 2 seconds to realize you meant the anime and not yourself(edited)Alex: our joj does have bizarre adventures to be fairSplit: You right you rightJojo: :,)Split: I could just hear your soul crackJojo: I'm glad. anyway look at this other kristen pokemon.

Kristen: No, I am drawing the line, no. You can't keep googling "what's the most harmless looking dust mote of a pokemon" and then say IT'S KRISTENJojo: NOO THAT'S NOT TRUE I'll tell you what. if you were a legendary pokemon you'd be Jirachi. that mf is p o w e r f u lKristen: Aw gosh. Wait didn’t we say MG would be edgy jirachi?Alex: her original character a jirachi-darkrai fusionJojo: I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT DARKRAI or a very smol GiratinaKristen: I do not know enough about this pokemon to comment.Alex: Giratina is Pokemon Satan.Kristen: Ah. Okay. Of course. Of course Pokemon Satan is a thing.Alex: 

Kristen: ...Oh it’s MG.Split: I distinctly remember pokemon satan ending up being a good guyJojo: so was darkraiKristen: I can't believe you just spoiled DMP and now I gotta cancel it.Alex: Satan: He's An Alright Guy!Split: P sure darkrai killed kidsKristen: ...it's fine don't worry about itAlex: Movie Darkrai was alright I thought? There are a whole lot of child murderin' pokemon out there to be fair.Split: Oh movie darkrai was futily attempting to stop the collapse of the universeIf i remember rightJojo: he also became attached to a childSplit: Big shrug on that sub plot its been yearsAlex: we have one hundred percent abandoned the original question. welcome to internet remixKristen: Yeeeep. Getting back on topic, I think Split would be Absol or Houndoom.Jojo: OOOOHHH I didn’t even think of AbsolSplit: Nah im the trainer

Alex: but consider: girafarigSplit: What isAlex: mostly i chose it because "aesthetic"

Kristen: PFFFT HAHAHASplit: Nah. Meanwhile, Kristen callin out my favorite pokemon as a kid. Regardless ive already grabbed a hat, tell tale sign of any trainer. Ive started walking the path every 13 year old must walk in their livesKristen: Pretty sure trainers start at 10?Split: Nah i mean im leaving my region for new boundsKristen: So brave. Anyway I’m trying to think of others. I'm trying to think of others. My brain keeps telling me that Alex is Entei. Tol and floofy and can burn things. But that's a legendary.Jojo: oooo I think he had a good pick of  exploud. Buuut I also think he'd be an Ursaring. 

Dawn: For me I tried to think of literally any water pokemon for me but lets be real here

Alex: I mean.Dawn: b0rfJuno: If I could be any nonlegendary mon it would be Golurk1) Giant Robot2) Can fly with rocket boosters3) Causes earthquakesTex: Umm. Hm. Something that was a mix of fire, dragon, and psychic. Like I know u can't get three. But listen.Walrus: w-walrein exists. so i meanJuno: MY TIME HAS COME

Walrus: HAHHhhhhWHEN THE FUCKHUHWHATI FORGOT OR DIDN'T SEE THISHONAtwas:  YO that's so fucking cool! To answer the prompt, I'd probably be a Zoroark.Kristen: Good choices.Scott: Could BE a non-legendary?Jojo: Hold on wait. let me guess: bunearyScott: No, that's what I would want to HAVE. Hm. This is actually tough. Maybe Altaria? It's a flying Pokemon that sings beautiful melodies and has a relatively average speed.I don't know. I'd want to be a Pokemon that was kind and graceful with musical qualities, if at all possible. So yeah, I guess AltariaKristen: I can see that.Juno: Also you're fluffyShyner: Hooooly shit there's a lot of stuff hereI feel bad about adding to this massive wall of content but I'm just putting down for the record that I would definitely be basic bitch eevee. I'll change my form for you, just please love me :,)Kristen: ;A; I LOVE EEVEE JUST THE WAY EEVEE ISJuno: eevee... babey

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Me, lying face-down on the floor exhausted but desperately wanting to see this before I get spoiled: STEVEN UNIVERSE FUTURE WATCH!

“Little Homeschool”

Steven keeps a photo of the gems in his car.....:’) That’s so sweet

IS THAT DIAMOND-THEMED BATH SOAP

“Happy welcome-back-day” STEVEN YOU’RE KILLING ME

OH MY GOSH IS THAT A ROSE QUARTZ??? No no ok GOSH THAT SCARED ME

“That used to be a loaded-question, but now I can say with full-confidence that I’m Steven Universe!” *SOBBING ON THE FLOOR* MY POOR STEVEN....

Gemglish.......

STEVEN CAN DRIVE...I CAN DRIVE...WE TRULY ARE IN THE FUTURE....

“Life is...a little different these days” this feels like the start of some teen movie. STEVEN I FEEL SO OLD....I’M AN OLD WOMAN NOW

LARS OWNS A SWEETS SHOP??? SPACETRIES IS SUCH A CUTE NAME OMG

 CONNIE!!!!! Awww sweetiepie... :’) “Chill beats to study to” lmao

RUBIES!!!!!

AMETHYST IS THE BEST TEACHER

lmao Amethyst is me as a teacher

“Her” HER?????????? Pink Pearl???

Steven.... :(  I feel u bud, having a lot of empathy / wanting to help everyone is a rough gig but someone’s gotta do it

OH SHOOT IT’S JASPER 

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH JASPER!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT”S BEEN YEARS

STEVEN PLEASE

“I don’t know their NAMES” JASPER PLEASE

“There’s just no one left to fight” Jasper I love you, you’ve got such DBZ vibes

“Sounds dumb” MAN I MISSED YOU SO MUCH

AW JASPER, SHE GETS SO EXCITED WHEN HE SAYS HE’LL FIGHT HER...Man I’m so glad to see her again

Steven doing a basketball throw then saying “Touchdown” was ADORABLE

JEEZ JASPER GO FOR THE THROAT WHY DON”T YOU

Jasper: CALLOUT POST FOR STEVEN UNIVERSE

(Real talk though that hit a little too close to home. “You’re the one who needs help. You think everyone needs help, but it’s only you” YIKES....)

THIS FIGHT IS SO ANIME, I LOVE IT

“Do what you want” awhhh

“There are fundamental parts about yourself that we know to be true” that’s so nice.

HE PUTS A STAR OVER THE I IN HIS NAME......STEVEN I LOVE YOU

Guidance

Man I forgot how short these episodes were

BIXBITE!!!!!!!! NEW GEM NEW GEM NEW GEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I mean not New new, but WE FINALLY HAVE YOUR NAME!!!!

“Look at that ‘za bra” I LOVE YOU AMETHYST

BLUE LACE AGATE!!!

BIGS NO!!!! 

THE QUARTZES ARE RUNNING THE CARNIVAL

Ruh-roh Stevie-boy

“I don’t snow about this” I MISSED THESE PUNS

“Ok that’s kinda troubling” LARIMAR NO

“Give me the screams!” I LOVE THEM ALREADY

STEVEN PLEASE SUPERVISE THESE KIDS

STEVEN YOU CAN STAR-OUT ON US oh ok I WAS GONNA SAY lmao

AW I love when the crewniverse shows up as background characters

A RUBY’S STRAIGHT UP ROBBING PEOPLE

Amethyst at a bar....drinking a snowcone...MAN I missed these characters!

SMOKEY!!!!! AHHHHHHH YO YOU CANT JUST WHIP OUT A FUSION LIKE THAT IM NOT PREPARED, MY HEART CANT TAKE THIS JOY

*makes jokes to try and chill things out* SMOKEY IS ME

SUPER SONIC SMOKEY???? STEVEN ARE YOU FRICKIN SLOWING DOWN TIME

I love Smokey

Aw Amethyst I’m so proud of you :’)

Uh Oh Amethyst don’t stress out the poor boy

“Let’s talk about your future!” AMETHYST YOU’RE STRESSING *ME* OUT WITH THAT QUESTION

OH NO ONION 

lmao he will be fine

Rose Buds

UH OH THIS IS SURE TO BE HEARTBREAKING

THE BATHROOM STEVEN....C’MON

“Is it me or is it getting kinda ominous outside” GREG I LOVE YOU

THE HUMANS?!?!?!

THE HUMANS HAVE THEIR OWN SHIP AHHHHH

LMAO EVERYONE’S STILL MAD AT GREG FOR DUMPING THEM

That space ship frickin rocks omg (no pun intended)

HOLLY BLUE IS STILL THERE AHHH THIS IS SO GOOD

lmao Holly Blue is exactly like the Aunt at a holiday party

Uh Oh Uh Oh UH OH UH OH

I THINK I JUST STOPPED BREATHING

I DONT THINK MY HEART IS WORKING 

I KNOW THIS MOMENT’S BEEN COMING SINCE THE MOMENT I SAW ALL THOSE ROSE QUARTZ GEMS BUBBLED BUT IM ACTUALLY NOT PREPARED FOR THIS AT ALL

*hyperventilates into a bag for five minutes before pressing play*

THEYRE LIKE BLONDES

Gosh this is so uncomfortable and sad :’(

AMETHYST’S REACTION

THIS IS SO FRICKIN UNCOMFORTABLE

Everyone’s reactions individually is so good but also I’m dying squirtle

NO GREG IS GONNA HAVE A HEART-ATTACK

“I haven’t had this many exes show up since--” OH NO

“I can feel the rest of my hair falling out” IM FRICKIN DYING

“NOPE” I FRICKING LOVE YOU GREG

FRICKIN EVERY ROSE IS TRYING TO HIT ON THEM

IM FRIICKIN DYING, THE CREWNIVERSE IS ACTIVELY KILLING ME RIGHT NOW

"STEVEN ISN’T THIS SUPER WEIRD” PEARL I’D DIE FOR YOU

“I know it’s wrong, but I’m overwhelmed” ME 2 PEARL

STEVEN YOU’RE DIGGING YOURSELF A DEEPER AND DEEPER DITCH

YIKES

OH NO THAT’S THE WORST ONE THEY COULD”VE PICKED

STEVEN COME ON

ME TOO STEVEN

“Never meet your heroes” OH NO....POOR BABIES

“We’re more like siblings” OH MAN I REALLY AM GOING TO CRY NOW

“Later, Rose Quartz” :( There’s so much weight in that one line....

AMETHYST I’D DIE FOR YOU

:(

I will say it’s very bittersweet and sad watching Steven Universe after everything that’s happened. Especially with all the recent developments in the story over the past few major arcs re: Rose Quartz.

Volleyball

“Ah jeez, the non-kissing one?” Aw Doctor Steven :’)

“Nurse-citizen-Universe” I’m so proud of your part-time job Stevie

PINK PEARL AHHHH

OH NO

Uh oh WHAT HAPPENED TO PINK PEARL

8( Uh Oh

UH OH IT WAS PINK.... Yikes she said it so casually too

"It’s just baggage. But it’s not about me!” FRICKIN HELL STEVEN 

WATCHING THIS BOY TRYING TO NAVIGATE HIS ANGER AND TRAUMA IS LIKE LOOKING IN A MIRROR, THIS SUCKS

I was gonna make a joke about Puberty and bad emotions being a bad mix and jacking up Steven’s powers but YEESH. Someone get this kid a therapist

Oh dear this is absolutely not going to work well.

“Did you come to compete” OH YIKES

OH YIKES YIKES YIKES 

I’m Sure This Can Only End Well

THE REEF!!!

“I was her Pearl!” “We were very close!” “I’m older than you”  JIMINY CHRISTMAS YOU TWO

OHHHHH MY GOSH IT”S SO PRETTY??? THE REEF IS SO PRETTY

SHELL????

Oh my gosh they really are calling her Volleyball

RIBBON-WAND!!!!!!!

“This circus of objectification” Pearl I love you

OH NO IT”S A TRAUMA WOUND

PEARL NO

OH NO OH YIKES

“How did you stop hurting?” “I didn’t” Oh man.....

IT”S UTENA!!!!!!!!!!

That was a really good way to end that episode

[thenixkat]

Animorphs notes: 18

Book 18

Narrated by Aximili

Again I really wish something had come of the andalite traitors thing

Ax’s audience is other andalites

Leera’s like the only planet besides Earth to get an actual name in this joint

Andalites don’t use money

Ax is tryin g to work to get money to buy food

Ax needs to stop dicking around in human morph b;c he’s gonna getsomeone in trouble, possibly killed

This manager is actually a nice person

So Marco caught Ax

They are retelling the event at Cassie’s barn]

They are waiting for news from Erek

So was Ax? Alone at the damn mall? I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again there are rocks smarter than these kids

Erik has hidden chee with him

Of course Tobias fucking spots them all, its not like the chee could make themselves invisible

Hewlett Aldershot the Third, that’s a serious name

Yeerks wanna infest im for reasons and had Iness hit him with a car

Is this the same yeerk infested hospital from an earlier book? I guess boiling a bunch of folks alive and a minor wildlife rampage didn’t do shit.

Marco’s snippy when bored

So, either Visser 3 knows how to morph regular clothes or isn’t hamped by them at all and no one feels the need to mention them ripping through some while morphiong

Yeerks can’t do anything with a comatose host. 

Either the head of the secret service is a lady or the president is

That’s not really how wings work forget it

People have to be seeing this 6 winged bird thing chasing a seagull

Also apparently the kafit is some kinda bird of prey

Ax’s seagull morph has talons apparently

Visser 3 is scared of getting into a tail fight

Visser 3 thinks a teenager can beat him.

They’re right b/c they are shit at fighting

Stand face to face for even more opportunity to injure yerself and give yer opponent a better shot at yer head

Visser 3 nopes out of the fight, breaking a leg in the fall, but morphing human fast

Too much protein keeps Aximili awake

Dinnier at Cassie’s ment a lot for Ax

Ax races around as he wrestles with his thoughts and goes to Tobias to talk about feeliongs

Yeerks infultrating the andalite homeworld was an interesting idea and the writers are cowards

Shut up Cassie

Cassie you liar

If they could aquire from say blood alone, then why don’t they just try acquiring from parts of animals like ever?

Rachel is concerned about blood borne diseases and doesn’t know how most of those are contracted

Ax that sounds like bullshit. 

Ax you just hang with little squeemish bitches

Andalites have weak slow baby hands

How exactly do they plan to acquire blood that they ate as a mosquito? If they eat it it starts to break down from digestion and would be decently degraded by the time they vomit it back up and try to acquire from it.

A random sick kid has seen Ax and now knows his name

More humans have seen Ax

And like what reason with the yeerks have to let witnesses go like? Good job at getting more folks enslaved Ax

Ax thinks about collateral damage for once

...that’s a false surrender. Good job Ax! Not no one on yer side can ever actually surrender! Also a war crime.

Ax jumps out a window and morphs mosquito

That’s still not how compound eyes work

Pop

And now in the imaginary place

Huh, Ax and the animorphs get to see themselves in a 4 dimensional? view

Like tesseracts made of meat

Neat

Why, exactly would Tobias., who is in morph in ya know the shape of a bird not appear as a human jigsaw as well in this place?

They got dragged into Z space by a passing ship

And resqued by an andalite crew

The animorphs and Ax made a scientific breakthrough

.7 Andalite years stuck on Earth

I havent gotten to thhat book on my re read but everything you just said was wrong Ax

So there are multiple pool ships and such

Aximili doesnt actually have to stay with you all

He can fight yeerks where ever he pleases and really kinda needs to see others of his own kind every now and then

That grass probably tastes good as fuck tho after almost a year in Earth grass

Andalites being speciest

“May your great god Cha-Ma-Mib smile on you this day.” religious space frogs

“The continent loomed larger and larger. Most of it was lush and green, primarily jungle. Green like Earth's forests and jungles, but with wide swaths of some brilliant yellow vegetation, too. The northern end of the continent was less fertile, more barren, probably colder.”

Leera

The captian is a traitor

Also it is apparently pretty damn easy to take out andalites if you have even the slightest amount of drop on them

Visser 3 and Visser 4 are friends

That tailless dick fortified and used a weapon

The animorphs decided not to stick around in just listening to orders

Gonna blow the kids out an airlock and hope they survive

None of these fucks think to get in a damn fighter craft or emergency escape and attempt to survive

Just, welp folks we’re fucked time for some suicide!

Also the captain wasn’t even a controller, just willingly on the yeerk’s side

On the one hand Ax did abandon them. On the other the animorphs are not entitled to his service

Also this just isn’t the right time to pick on Ax

This is reallt not the right fucking time, Marco and Rachel are either trying to get themselves or someone else killed with their bullshit

Tobias u fucking chose to live in the woods as a wild animal, Aximili didn’t choose to be marroned on an alien world

You feathery asshole

Tobias vanished

Adi-fuckin-os

The yeerk forces are doing well on ground battle

Ax, the animorphs, the andalites, and the writers have failed ecology

Rachel vanished

The writers just really fucking hate sharks

“The water was perfectly, utterly clear. We were swimming in water that was forty feet deep, and we could see every detail on the ocean floor.

 And what detail! Huge, billowing creatures like white and yellow sails, triangular with biological propellers at each corner. Brilliant, electric-blue worms or snakes, each seventy feet long, swimming in wild schools. A bizarre creature that rose and fell through the water by blowing air into a bladder so thin it was almost transparent. A wonderful sort of fish in the shape of a screw that rotated its way through the water.

 And these creatures weren't scattered here and there, but everywhere. The Leeran ocean was a madhouse of life-forms.

 Spread around across the ocean were bubbling chimneys of rock and soil, encrusted with squirming, writhing creatures, small and less small. My shark senses could feel the electrical discharge from these chimneys, and the intense warmth. As I watched, a massive school of the brilliant blue worms came swirling around one of the chimneys. It swirled and my shark senses could feel the energy flow from the chimney into the worms.”

There would still be fucking predators u nits

“They were mostly yellow. They had skin that was slimy, as if covered with ooze, yet rough in texture, like gravel. They had large, webbed back legs. For arms they had four tentacles arrayed around their plump, barrel-shaped bodies.  The head was quite large, with a bulge at the back. It sat right on the shoulders. There was no neck. The face bulged outward and seemed to have just two features. A huge, wide, almost ridiculous mouth. And big, bulging eyes of a green that seemed almost to be lit from inside.

 There were four Leerans. They were riding on water jets. The water jets were long, narrow tubes, flared in front to make a sort of wing, flared again in back to give extra

maneuverability. Arrayed along the back wing were clusters of very narrow tubes pointed forward.”

Leerans

The crew free some leerans (granted they were going to kill them) b/c the leerans showed them how to get the yeerks out of them

The team morph leerans and are uncomfortable with knowing eachother’s thoughts

Oh what normal space ships arent good enough for crushing ocean pressures now? Gotta have actual submarines?

A lot of these high ranking andalites are quick to yelling and threats of violence aint they

That is a very iffy plan not the least being the yeerks with their mostly terrestrial shock troops would have likely set up camp there anyway it seems. But if u wanna throw away lives who cares

Marco vanished

Talking to scientists and shit

Actually Jake, if all of you vanish b4 u carry out the mission it will be too late for a back up

A world with no predators my ass

Cassie vanishes

Ah, so yeah bats aint flying with torn to shit wings. They’s ded

Jake vanished

How exactly did the andalites get the shit in there in the first place?

Hah, the hork hosts have rocket boosters

Aximili is saved by vanishing

So why were they snapped back in mosquito morph and not just flund full force back into their real bodies

And why snap them all back to the same moment and not staggared into different moments in time

How the fuck did this man feel a damn mosquito bite? A notible aspect of mosquitoes as that we don’t really feel them biting

Genral yeerk panicking over management

End with scene at mall

[dreammutual-remade]

best friends to lovers!lucas

request: ok ur SO FUNNY when i was reading ur hyunjin scenario i almost pissed my pants istg ur fckin hilarious !! and could you do like a best friends to lovers type trope with lucas from nct? love ur writing and please go nuts my guy <3 <3 - @nctro​

word count: 3.7k

a/n: djfhgkhdj thank u sO MUCH everyone who compliments me on here makes me blush dhbfkhsbdk anywhom I actually enjoyed writing this so much mainly because I love big dumb boys and Lucas is one of those !!!! I hope u like it bby<3

warnings ?: cursing and brief mentions of underage drinking 

okie doke babe

l e t s d i v e i n

let’s set the scene fellas

you’re in like the second grade right

boys are: disgusting and mean

but this is when you meet your bestie !!!!!

lucas was a new kid all the way from china and he was , the only boy you’d ever found cute

(i mean y’all have seen those baby pics oh my gOD HE WAS SO CUTE)

and when the teacher introduced him he was obviously a bubbly kid but none of the others in your class seemed to warm up to him

:((((

later when you all are at recess he keeps trying to join the boys but they won’t let him because as previously stated

THEYRE MEAN AND GROSS

he looks so so sad and lonely and you’re a Sweet Baby Girl so you go up to him and ask if he wants to play w/ u :)))

he’s so excited !!!! hooray !!!!!!!!!!

you guys play house and BAM

BEST FRIENDS FOREVER

your friendship lasts all through elementary school !!

even in fourth grade when you guys were in different classes he would come find you at recess and your moms would arrange play dates :))))

middle school was,

middle school

we don’t talk abt that

all you need to know is that it was embarrassing

and yeehaw we’ve made it thotties aLL THE WAY TO SENIOR YEAR

let’s do a brief summary of 9th-11th grade

9th grade:

lucas is taller than you but only by a little and his voice breaks every other sentence

his ears are still too big for his body :(

you are a late bloomer and still look 12 but you’re , TRYING YOUR BEST

you guys have about half of your classes together but remain really close since you eat lunch together and hang out after school too

lucas attempts to join the basketball team

he . doesn’t make it and is v upset so you have to come over and comfort your Pitiful Man Baby

he cries a little and ouchie yOUR HEART hurts

but then he’s like u never saw that THOT

and so you are forced into silence rip

10th grade:

lucas FINALLY gets his permit halfway through the year because he fuckinh forgot to do it last year and you’re TERRIFIED but it’s fine

you’re starting to look more like a female and less like a fetus congrats !!!!!

lucas has now grown to almost 6 feet tall what the FUCK BRO

he grew at least 6 inches over the summer and you don’t really notice until one day you’re like uhhh excuse me since when are you half a foot taller than me

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

and this boy LORDS his height over you

purposefully places things where you can’t reach it so he can be like

*tips fedora* m’lady , are u in need of assistance

after this you have perfected the art of pinching his arm til he screeches

also his voice has gotten sooooo so so deep

like okay darth vader CHILL OUT

with all this height though he is even clumsier than before

it’s like he forgets he’s now a giant 15 yr old

he’s always covered in scratches and bruises so you’ve taken to carrying disney princess bandaids

they’re disney princess because you thought it would embarrass him and encourage him not to get hurt but

he loves them so it didn’t work rip

he tries out for the basketball team again and genuinely makes it based on height alone

i mean the boy can barely dribble but ??? he can learn i guess

he calls you when he makes it and screams for 45 seconds straight

you don’t know wtf goin on so you’re like oh mY GOD ARE U OKAY

and he’s like yES BITCH I MADE THE TEAM

and then you scream for 45 seconds

next time you see him in person you tackle him with a hug and he lifts you up and spins you around because wow !!!!! so happy !!!!

11th grade:

ah, yes

the year of PARTYING

you always go to parties together and switch who’s dd each time

eventually more friends start coming with you so that you can both get drunk tho ayy

but for the first couple times it’s either drunk lucas half draped on you as you drag him home or sober lucas carrying your lightweight ass to the car

he’s a real one so he won’t say anything about the time you were really drunk and got separated from him so you stood on a table and screamed his name til he came and snatched you down lmao

lucas has reached full height as well so he’s like, so much bigger than you

also he’s gotten so much better at basketball and is practically the star of the team

you go to every game and cheer as loud as you can bc that’s your BOY

puberty is Complete for you and you look female and everything!!!! go off queen 

lucas is now on Protective Mode since you’re really cute and a very agreeable drunk and under no circumstances will he allow you to be taken advantage of

NOT on my watch- lucas

alright we’re gonna make senior year the present timeline bc

YOLO

lucas is officially more popular than you

BUT

he actually sticks around because he’s The Best

okay also this guy just keeps getting larger

like he got all tall but THEN

he was doing basketball so much and just genuinely enjoyed doing sports in general that our boy was thicc with two(2) got damn c’s

you don’t notice that much until he gets into a habit of throwing you over his shoulder whenever you won’t pay attention to him

and it’s , unnerving how easily he does it

he’s started wearing shirts that show off his, eh hem, assets

long story short he’s hot as fuck and even you see him and you’re like DAYUM

also every female in your school is. ALL OVER HIM

it’s hard to walk next to him in the halls because people genuinely shove you out of the way to get next to him

at first you just kind of let it happen and he didn’t notice the first few times

that made u hella emo :(((((

but now he INSISTS upon holding your hand and dragging you behind him through the crowds

you highkey blush the whole time and everyone is all ArE yOu GuYs DaTiNg ?!/&:&:$

lucas is like NO.

:))))

ouchie

you start overthinking things because ??? would it really be so bad to be dating you jeez

you’re not terribly ugly or anything ???

at least you don’t think so

oh my god he thinks you’re ugly and annoying and he hates you

self hatred commence in 3,2,....... someone play the icarly theme song

you lowkey start distancing yourself and he himself is busy busy bee so

you start seeing less of each other :/

and you miss him soooo so much (this is your own doing BITCH) but it doesn’t even seem like he misses you at all wtf

he’s just having a great time w/ his basketball boy(friend)s and everyone loves him and you’ve been hashtag left behind :(

he really didn’t mean to he just !!!! has so much going on aaaa

and like in his absence you start realizing a lot of things

like how much you actually liked his cringey ass flirting

you would always smack him every time he was like “oh sorry, just got lost in ur eyes what did u say :3”

you miss his hugs because they were really rEALLY GOOD

he tucks you under his chin and squishes you or he’ll just wrap his arms around and pick you up

your feet just ???? dangle

you miss when he would show up at your house at like 11 with a bunch of shitty foreign films and force you to watch them with him

you miss when you both would fall asleep in a pile on the couch and he would wake up and carry you to bed

because he’s an angel THATS WHY

anywhom

you miss everything about him and you just are so upset that he doesn’t pay that much attention to you

it gets WORSE when you notice some other girl hanging out with him

and she’s prettier than you and apparently good enough for his attention when you aren’t and you’re just so full of

what’s the word

JEALOUSY.mp3

go listen to jealousy by monsta x

but obviously you’re not going to acknowledge that because what’s a good friends to lovers story without a hearty helping of denial

he still tries to hang out with you so you guys do see each other in class and at least a couple weekends out of the month but :(((

it’s nowhere near how close you were

it all comes to a head when one day you’re walking in the hall and it’s hella crowded

way worse than usual

and in the center of the crowd is

you guessed it :’-)

our boy yukhei

and he just asked this girl to the winter formal and she’s nodding and smiling and hugging him and he’s smiling too and you

gotta go

your eyes are already starting to water and you start skirting around the edges of the crowd to get to a bathroom

one of your other friends jeno who also plays with lucas on the team sees you and smiles and lifts his hand

but it immediately shifts into a frown when he sees your face

he reaches out to grab your wrist and asks if you’re okay and what’s wrong

you just bring your other hand up to sloppily wipe at your watery eyes and whisper that it’s nothing

the hand he’s got in his grasp has started to shake and he looks really worried so he tugs you around the corner until he doesn’t see anyone around

and he turns to look you in the eyes all Serious

“alright. spill”

and you just

BURST INTO TEARS

he panics and hesitantly puts an arm around your shoulders to pat your back

you just press your forehead into his shoulder and cry

it’s a short cry though because although we are dramatic out here we aren’t doing The Absolute Most

you pull away and wipe your eyes and take a few deep breaths before you apologize

jeno smiles sadly and pats your head and says it’s okay and that he hopes it helped

you stand there for 37 seconds exactly in silence

jenos been counting

and then you let the cat out of the bag

you adMIT FINALLY !!!!!

that you are really in love with your bff/sort of ex-bff and you’re really jealous and sad because he doesn’t even CARE about you anymore

at first jeno is quiet but then he starts laughing

and he won’t stop

and you’re like if you keep going i’m going to cry again please i’m so sensitive

and he shuts up immediately and is like o_o

but then he grips you by your shoulders and is like hEY

“guess what”

“god jeno i am really not in the mood”

“no for real guess what the fuck is up”

“what is up ???? what is up you asshole ???”

“yukhei is in love with you too”

you scoff and roll your eyes

“this is a really lame attempt to make me feel better”

“no really i’m not even lying i swear he talks about you all the time in the locker room and he literally thinks you’re an angel”

“okay but its platonic as hell like obviously we love each other after all these years but he doesn’t like ME in the way i like HIM”

“how do you know??”

“how do YOU know ?????”

“,,,,,, you got me there”

you pat his shoulder and you’re like listen i really appreciate you trying to make me feel better but it’s time for me to accept my fate

now you and lucas still text semi regularly and send each other memes and stuff

but you just, cut him off because you physically can’t move on if you interact with him at all you LOVE this boy

he def notices and texts you a few times like

y/n ??? hello? is your phone broken?

but when you stop waving back at him in the hallways and actively avoiding him he realizes you’re not talking to him

and this poor boy cannot for the life of him figure out why

he doesn’t UNDERSTAND

god he’s dumb but we still stan

he figures you want him to leave you alone so he just stares at your forlornly from afar

this just pisses you off bc like wtf nOW YOURE GONNA PAY ATTENTION TO ME ??????

a couple weeks pass and it’s time for winter formal

yay.

you’ve been dragged here by jeno who is SURE that something important is gonna happen tonight and lucas is gonna Fix Everything

yeah OKAY

SURE

you may not want to go but you wouldn’t be caught DEAD not stunting on these hoes

you show up looking absolutely SPICY

QUEEN OF WINTER

you know you had to do it to em

jeno forcefully pulls you into the doors of the gymnasium and then disappears after he threatens you with an

“i told chenle not to let you leave”

and you turn to look at chenle who is SGA and helping with the dance and he gives you an “i’m watching you” hand motion

god this is ridiculous

you sigh and go find some of your other friends

you hate to admit this but. you actually had a little fun

and then of course

a slow song was played

and the dj is all yo everyone find you a honey it’s time to slow it down for a bit

sigh

you go to walk off the dance floor or find jeno or do SOMETHING other than stand around looking awkward surrounded by couples

but someone has snatched your hand up yo wtf

it’s LUCAS

and you just look at him with confusion

“dance with me, please. just this once,,,”

and you’re like hmmm pls don’t make me do this

but he hits you with Them Puppy Dog Eyes and you’re a goner

so you let him pull you close and hold you against his chest and rest his chin on the top of your head

you lift up on your toes so you can talk in his ear

“where’s your date?”

“dancing with her girlfriend”

“um. what”

“she’s not super duper out yet so i’m being her beard for the night. it was mainly to get her parents off her back”

“oh. huh”

“plus i missed you :(((( you disappeared”

your hands tighten in the fabric of his button up bc you’re like aw FUCK

you just shake your head and rest it back on his chest and close your eyes to enjoy it while you can

as much as you want to be convinced that things can go back to the way they were now

they cANNOT because you still love him and he still just thinks of you as a friend

maybe not even a best friend anymore :(

(again,, YOUR FAULT BITCH)

his GIANT warm hands slide across your waist to press you forward by the small of your back

at this point you are pressed together basically head to toe

and you can’t tell for sure but , you think he kissed the top of your head ???

maybe you were freakin hallucinating though since you’re losing oxygen fast due to his close proximity

the song ends and you slowly stop swaying and pull apart while everyone gets back to being wild

“can we.. go talk outside”

this sentence strikes FEAR in your heart but you take his proffered hand as he leads you outside

it’s cold as hell so you’re already wound up tight and wrapping your arms around yourself to keep warm

he notices quickly and wraps his jacket around you before turning to face outward towards the road

it’s quiet other than the muffled music from inside and crickets and other night noises

he opens his mouth to say something but you just blurt out

“i like you!!!!”

and he whips around to face you and you just. keep talking

“it’s oKAY i know you don’t like me back like that and i would never be mad at you about that i didn’t distance myself from you bc of that!!!! i just had to because it was hurting me to be around you and see you be with other girls and i really wanted to move on so that we could get back to being best friends if you even wanted that i just !!! IT JUST HAPPENED OKAy i’m sO SORRY AND I ComPLetely understand if you never want to speak to me again”

and he’s just staring at you and panting

why is he out of breath he’s just been standing there

you’re getting super duper nervous because he hasn’t said aNYTHING and it’s been at least a minute

and then he just goes

“you… like .. me ???”

and you’re like ugh YES you dumbass have you even met yourself you’re so cute and sweet and such a goofy boy and you’re way too nice to me and also HOT so like. you were asking for it

and he immediately swings you into his arms and gives you a big sloppy kiss on the cheek and buries his face in your shoulder and squeals

this man. SQUEALS

and you giggle because it’s tickling your neck hey stop that

and he’s laughing that loud ass cackle of his so you’re laughing too i mean have y’all heard that shit

GOOFY AS HELL

also he’s hugging you almost just like he used to with your feet dangling off the ground

and he pulls back to set you down but then

HE GRABS YOUR FACE

AND KISSES YOU  ??!/&8:$:$:92&

b i t c h

he’s so gentle and is patient when you kind of freeze at first, pulling away and pressing his lips very gently to the corner of your mouth before going Back In

and even though he’s given you NO EXPLANATION FOR THIS you kiss him back because this may be a one time only opportunity and you will NOT be wasting it 

he goes very slow and sweet and right before he pulls away he presses a cute lil smooch to your bottom lip and presses his forehead against yours

“what was that for?”

“oh yeah, i forgot to tell you!! i’m in love with you”

“oh hEY me too ??!!?!&/&”

and you’re both pressed together and giggling

“hey, you wanna ditch and go get some ice cream”

“absolutely”

so he lets his date know and you text jeno

(you: bIIIIIIIITTCHHHH    jeno: I KNEW IT)

and you’re off

he holds your hand the whole way there and when he parks he spRINTs around the car so he can open it for you

you each get an ice cream cone and sit next to each other at a picnic table and just talk and catch up with each other since you haven’t been talkin :/

one of your hands is laced with his and your head is leaned on his shoulder and he’s like hEY watch it this is my favorite shirt

and he flexes his arm with your head on it and you’re like god dAMN that’s a bicep

and he’s like ayy lmao arent u glad ur dating a greek demi god  🤪🤪

and you smack HIM

“i cant believe you just declared us as dating in the same sentence as calling yourself a greek demigod”

“are we ,,,, not dating”

“i mean personally, i haven’t gotten asked on a date yet. hmmmm, have you? :-)”

and he sighs dramatically before wrapping an arm around your waist and leaving a somewhat sticky kiss on your temple from the ice cream

he leans down to your ear

“hey so there’s this girl and her name is y/n and she’s so beautiful and funny and i love her so much do you think she would go on a date with me ? :3”

“hmmm well i guess so,,, she could give you a chance…..”

you hold a straight face for less than 5 seconds before you get all blushy and smiley and he squeals at you

......again

and grabs your face with his hands since he literally dEVOURED that ice cream cone

he presses a kiss to the tip of your nose and then to your lips and says against them,

“please~”

another kiss

“for me?~”

another

“cmon~”

and he goes in for another but you’re like oKAY okay i’ll date you you giant pain in my ass

and he’s like :-(((((((

(DONT BE MEAN TO THE BABY BOY)

and you’re like aw i’m sorry you’re MY giant pain in the butt

he seems pretty satisfied with that and after you finish your ice cream cone he is already at the door waiting with the door open

“if you dARE say m’lady i will walk home”

“of course ,,,,,,,,, m’lady”

“alrIGHT THATS IT”

he grabs your hand and pulls you back toward him to keep you from leaving and presses a kiss to your forehead and ruffles your hair a little

before he kindly and gently shoves you into the car

he drives home with one hand on the wheel while you mess with the fingers of his other hand because wow

that shit is amazing he’s got some big ole beautiful hands

when you arrive he walks you to your door and

this mf presses you against it and presses an absolutely SINFUL kiss onto your lips before turning around and heading back to his car

“bye, baby!! i’ll see u tmrw at school :-)))))”

and first of all: KKDKDNDKDJ

second: he called you baby it’s officially over for you bitch

you wave back blankly because what the hell just happened and then you go inside

you press yourself against the door after you close it behind you and press your hands into your warm cheeks

and woooo bOY what have you gotten yourself into

a supportive and caring boyfriend who LOVES YOU THATS WHAT !!!!!!!!

okay goodbye i really love wong yukhei xuxi lucas whatever the fuck his name is

[babykpopsweets]

Truthful Blood

| anon reqeusted |

Is your requests still open? I want to request a Mafia AU with Minseok/Xiumin when he is a gang leader and then he finds out that his s/o is also the leader of their rival gang/group. And I'll leave the rest to you because I believe in your creativity. Make it Angsty & w/ a very fluffy ending please.. 😚 T H A N K Y O U~ 💜💜💜

Y/G/N = ya gangs name

UNEDITED

—-

‘Information not found’

The file said as Xiumin tried to scoop up some info on the leader of his rival mafia gang leader.

“What the hell?! This person literally has nothing on them. Ughhhhh” Xiumin groaned as he started to try a new route of figuring it out.

“What are you doing baby?” You questioned while rubbing his shoulders.

“I am trying to find out who the leader is for our rival mafia gang that keeps interfering with us. But there is literally nothing at all for them to be found.” Xiumin sighed and then kissed your hand.

“Do you need help?” You offered your assistance as you knew he might want it.

“Deeply. You can try your best; not even Suho nor Lay could find a lick of info on them.”

“You see Xiumin, I know a lot more people then you think I do.”

“Uh, I do not know how to feel about that.”

“Thas a good signal then. By the way I need to tell you something. I just don’t know when I will maybe not today cause’ you seem a little... busy.”

“Hm? Oh yeah haha real funny. Y/N I love you and you know that so take your time to tell me whatever it is.”

“Thank you. And I think you should get off the conputer it’s 12:39 pm. I think you should rest it off.”

“Seriously? Aish, I guess I could try and catch some Z’s.”

“You better!”

—————————————————————

The morning came around quicker then Xiumin would have expected. His eyelids were very heavy as he tried waking up. He bolts his hand to block his face from the blazing sun. Xiumin looks next to him and sees you aren’t there. How weird? You are always there when he wakes up. If anything he was the one leaving before you awoke. He just dusted it off thinking you were probably grocery shopping.

Xiumin rose out of bed and went to the bathroom. He took and a shower came out then brushed his teeth. After he finished getting ready he peeked his head outside the bedroom door to see if you were around. Still not here? Grocery shopping doesn’t usually take this long. He takes out his phone and dials you number. Only hoping you’ll pick up.

‘The number you have tried to reach is currently unavailable. Please leave a message after the beep.’

*beep*

“Y/N-ah where are you?! Call me back as soon as you hear this. Please.”

He hung up the phone and sighed loudly. As he was about to start making breakfast, a message came through to his computer. Xiumin takes a glance at the name lf the person. It seemed like the rival gangs official number. But how? He never had any information on them and suddenly he has the contact. Then reality hit him hard.

How come every time something happened with the other gang you were never here?

How come the morning after he said he had trouble finding info to you a message came rolling in?

Were you somehow in an alliance with the opposing team?

Upon realization, Xiumin knew that he didn’t have much time to think of a plan. He would have to hurry and try to make you confesses before it was too late.

Just 30 minutes after you came in. He was quick to hide some where he could see you but you couldn’t seem him. He might’ve seemed like a stalker right now but this was vital. Xiumin watched as you closed the door and hung up your keys. You looked around for him and called out for his name once.

“Xiumin baby?” You yelled out looking at your surroundings.

It seemed like the coast was clear. You reached into your mini velvet bookbag and pulled out your phone. You dialed a number then put it to your ear to speak. Xiumin pulled his computer on his lap and hacked into your phone so he could hear the conversation through his ear piece.

“Hey~ I think Xiumin left the house already. :c” You said into the phone.

“So when are you going to tell him?” The other person immediately asked firmly.

“You see I don’t know. He’ll hate me if he found out I am leader of his rival mafia gang. And on top of that he’ll think I am trying to use for info or whatever. I really love him I don’t want to lose him.”

“Ah yah! You have to tell him soon. The later you tell him the worse the consequences.”

“You are right. All this time I haven’t ever even thought about telling him. Maybe I should. I am going to call him now thanks bye!”

You hung up the phone.

You grunted at the thought of Xiumin practically hating you. This wait any longer though. It’s best for the truth to come out now rather then later. Before you could call him, Xiumin emerges from the shadows. Seeing his angry face you knew he heard everything.

“Oh Xiumin! D-did you by any chance hear all of that?”

“How could you?”

“I am sorry. I was leader of a mafia gang and I fell in love. With you. Then right when I was going to confess this to you our gang clashed.”

“You are a filthy liar Y/N. I can’t believe I practically gave you all of EXO’s information and you backstab me.”

“Look I am not a liar! I just didn’t tell you about it I never said I didn’t own a gang or something. But saying that doesn’t justify what I did.”

“You are probably just here for the information! You never cared did you? It was all for the stupid dirty cash you want right?!”

“Woah woah woah. I never said any of that! Did you or did you not just hear my conversation?! I said I loved you and that if I told you about this you would hate me. And I would hate myself too!”

“well you were right then. I do hate you. You betrayed me. And I don’t want to see you right now.”

“Fine. I’ll leave then.”

Right as you were storming out of that joint, you remembered you had bought Xiumin something. You stopped dead in your tracks and reached in your bookbag. You pulled out the IPhone X and placed it on the table. You knew Xiumin had broke his phone recently on a mission so you felt bad about it. Thus you bought a new one. After it was safely on the table you walked out not looking back once.

The door slammed shut and Xiumin let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding in. He softly made his way to the phone. Upon opening the case a paper appeared. He out the top down; he opened the letter to reveal a whole paragraph.

~

Xiumin-ah,

I am truly deep down inside sorry. I kept the fact that I am the mafia leader of your rival gang for sooo long. Too long to be exact. I didn’t mean or want to cause any harm to you nor EXO members. If you could be so kind as to forgive me. This isn’t a kiss up either! It’s just my way of showing I truly care. <3

~

Xiumin felt a salty warm tear rush down his face. He went a tad bit overboard. You were going to tell him everything but you were too scared? Why? He could never hate you. hate. Hate. HATE. At that second he progressed what he had said to you in order for you to leave. He said he hated you. That wasn’t true, Xiumin knew that. Did you know that?

The only person he truly hated right now was himself. He never bothered to hear you out completely.

“I’ve gotta go after her.” He whispered to himself as he grabbed his computer to look at your location.

You were at a random place which he assumed was your other mansion from your mafia. He grabbed his keys and blasted out of there.

-

Many awful thoughs crossed Xiumins mind at the time. None of them were really as important as how bad he felt. He knows you messed up yet he did himself too. He didn’t give you even a second to explain.

Two minutes later he arrived at this big luxurious mansion. Xiumin shut his car off, locked it, and went to your door. There was no answer at the door when he knocked so he rang the door bell. Nothing. He stood there while his heart dropped to his feet. Xiumin wished he could take back what he said. He didn’t givenup though and knocked once more. There wasn’t an answer still.

Drip drip...

Great. It was drizzling now. And he was waiting outside your door like a fool. More then likely he will get sick from this but he’d do anything for you because he is a fool that is in love with you. Only you, no one else would ever cross his mind. To Xiumin no one in this world is conparable to you and how much you put up with him.

As he was sulking in his own saddness he heard the door unlock. Immediately his hope sprung up again. He raised his head to be greeted by the sight of your watery eyes.

“Don’t just stand there. You’ll get sick. Come in.” You said opening the door more.

“Thanks” Xiumin replied rushing in to get warm.

-

An awkward silence was present as Xiumin was taking a look around. It took him to break the silence.

“Look. I know I really messed up. But you have to know how important something like that is really.” Xiumin finally spoke dragging his feet towards you.

“Yeah I know. You didn’t need to come off like that though.”

“I know that too. Please forgive me. We can work this out. I just need you to be truthful with me.”

“...I am. I have too. It’s just never told you about one thing. I never lied about it or say I wasn’t. I just never told you anything.”

“Fair enough. You have to be mire OPEN with me. I need to know what’s happening in your life in order to live mines correctly. I am nothing without you Y/N. I love you.”

“I love you too Xiumin and I promise to be more expressive and open with you.”

Xiumin took advantage of this moment of forgiveness and locked your lips together. After that you both discussed what to do with your seperate mafias. It took an hour but you both agreed to join forces.

Months later the EXO and Y/G/N became the strongest gang to ever come on the sceen. Maybe uncovering some secrets is for the best. In some cases at least.

~~~~

Alrightyyyy so sorry this took so long but I hope you like it. I hated this but whatever I tried my best. Enjoy!

-Jamz

[licentiousladylunafreya-blog]

"Sweet, Lying Behemoth”

Rating: M+

Content: Language, Little fluff, Smut, I’m not fluffy today

Words: 4,000+

Minutes to read: 30-45

Day One: [Oct. 9th]

[PROMPTIO] ”Sweet, Lying Behemoth”

Prompto hiked up the trail hand in hand with Gladio. The older male insisting that it was for Prompto’s own safety so that he wouldn’t slip and fall again. Which he had already done a good half a dozen times thanks to his nerves. And Gladio holding his hand just chatting him up like it was nothing, wasn’t helping either. He had noticed his comrade’s sudden strange behavior in the last week, and was slowly coming to a realization…

A little stroll through the past week…

The first couple days, Gladio had been unusually nice to him. Of course he caught a little sand here and there, but his sudden niceties were enough for the whole group to notice. Everyone just assumed he was in a good mood.

After that, some serious behavior changes went on. When they stayed in hotels, Gladio usually shared a bed with Ignis, while Prompto shared with Noctis. But instead, he’d join Prompto, or insist that Prompto come sleep with him. Then there was the borderline tent cuddling, but Prompto didn’t really pay it any mind. They were always shoved in the tent every which way, so he was used to being in some kind of position. Be it spooning with Gladio even-

Then the rest of the week was just beyond Prompto. Damn near puppy love. If hadn’t known any better, he’d say Gladio was openly flirting with him. Not just teasing him when they were with the others, but when they were alone too. Almost like he was testing him…Strange topics of conversation would come up, like Gladio probing him about his love-life and preferences. It was there that Prompto figured he made a mistake by leaving himself “open”, instead of clarifying that all those preferences were aspects he might have been looking for in a girl. But, that’s just how he was. Open.

Finally, when Gladio had his opportunity, he made his move.

“ah, now of all times…” Noctis said with a groan as he put his cell phone back in his pocket.

“Who was that?” Prompto asked looking up to his friend as he finished setting the tent.

“Cid. He’s finished tinkering with one of my weapons and wants me to come get it right now and Cindy wants to see me too. Says she’s got something real nice for the Regalia that she wants to surprise me with.” Noctis wasn’t all that tired, but didn’t want to make the trip all the way back to Hammerhead.

“Oh! I’ll come with y-“ Before Prompto could even get started, Gladio cut him off.

“We should finish setting up camp. Ignis can go with Noctis. He drives most anyway.” Gladio said as he tied down the other end of the tent.

Prompto looked over to him with his jaw dropped in disbelief. He had really wanted to cruise with Noct, and here Gladio was again, being…Whatever it was he had been all week. Prompto would have retorted, but said nothing else, and finished the job at hand.

“A-Alright then! You guys go on. Gladio and I will finish up here. When do you think you’ll be back?” The blonde asked now standing and dusting off his hands.

“We should be back by late evening. All depending on how long the modifications to the Regalia take.” Ignis said with a nod. “Let us be going Noct.”

“Uh, yeah.” Noctis then followed Ignis back out through the trail, going to where he parked the Regalia.

Gladio and Prompto both watched the two leave, like it’s what they were waiting for. And as soon as they were out of sight, it seemed like it was exactly what Gladio was waiting for. He turned around looking to Prompto with a smirk.

“Good, now that they’re gone…” Gladio walked over to the blonde, picking up a knapsack as he did.

“N-Now that they’re gone…?” Prompto’s expression was nervous as Gladio got even closer, taking him by the wrist.

“I found a nice little spot. Let’s go.”

And with that vague and undefined statement, Gladio was pulling Prompto along through the woods…

Now…

Relaying all that, Prompto had come to a horrifying realization of what Gladio’s intentions were building up to.

“Holy Chocobaby.”

Suddenly Gladio’s heavy chuckle snagged Prompto’s attention. “I knew it was a nice spot, but I wasn’t expecting that reaction.”

“H-Huh? What do you- Oh…O h…” Prompto finally realized where he was, and Gladio might as well have dragged him out on a romantic picnic, he thought, as he watched the man roll out the blanket like they were sleeping out there.

“u-Uh, y’know we could’ve just…Laid out back at the camp?” Prompto said inching away from Gladio but steadily towards the stream that was there.

“I know. I just wanted to show you this place. Thought you might wanna take a few pictures.” Gladio said as he laid back on the blanket, eyes closed and hands now resting behind his head.

“Hmm…If romantic setting is your thing, yeah…Wait that’s it!? You just brought me out here to take pictures!? Really?! N-Nothing else?”

Gladio snorted, eyes still closed. “You sound like you were expecting something else.”

Prompto only stood with a totally confused look on his face. No way. After all that stuff he was doing. This is all he dragged him all the out away from camp for. Prompto wasn’t going to let the opportunity pass though, he was definitely going to take a few shots of this place…But he still found it hard to believe Gladio was just going to lay there and get a tan while he snapped photos.  Shaking his head and ignoring the thoughts, Prompto took out his camera, and got to work. He snapped a few shots of the scene with an aesthetic selfie here and there.

Why the heck am I even acting disappointed?

He thought rhetorically. It’s not like he wanted Gladio to make a move on him. Wouldn’t that just be weird? Maybe he was making too much of something out of nothing…

“Lying Behemoth…” Prompto muttered as he took a few pictures of Gladio lying in the sun.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“Hmph…”

With a groan, Prompto plopped down in the grass a few feet away from Gladio. The “lying Behemoth”, just lying there like Prompto wasn’t there. Frustrated, the blonde started spam snapping pictures of him, the camera clicking over and over and over.  After a good minute or two, Gladio realized something wasn’t right and opened an eye and looked over to Prompto.

“What, are you doing?”

“What are you doing?” Prompto countered still spamming photos.

“What?”

“WHAT?”

“What!?”

“Why are you ignoring me!?”

“I’m not! I was letting you take your pictures!”

“And then what?!” Prompto moved the camera even closer to Gladio’s face, snapping away.

“Then—Get that camera out of my face! Then I was going to have a look!”

“You-!” Prompto went to argue again, then stopped. “…You wanna see my pictures?”

“Yeah! It’s not the first time. I just didn’t know you were gonna start losing your shit because I was letting you focus.” Gladio scoffed as he sat up on his side propped on an elbow.

“Oh…You…Wanna see them now?” Prompto’s demeanor went meek, though he was mentally cursing himself for blowing things way out of proportion. Gladio just wanted some pictures. Just pictures. Okay.

“If you’re done being a spaz…”

“…I’m done!” Prompto quickly plopped down on is stomach next to Gladio, and started going through his photos. Half of them he already had names for.

He was so absorbed in presenting his work to Gladio, he had forgotten what he was complaining about only a moment ago.  He appreciated the new nice behavior from Gladio, and would have felt stupid about his assumption. Though he didn’t notice how much Gladio was watching him as much as his pictures.

“Oh! And this is a cute little nest of baby birds! They’re right over in that bush back there! And-“

Prom suddenly paused, his cheeks heating up to dust over a light shade of pink. Gladio had just moved, putting an arm around the smaller males waist, and planted the most feathered of kisses on Prompto’s neck.

“Keep talking, I’m listening…” Gladio insisted, his hand gliding up and down Prompto’s back, as he continued on with the feather kisses to his neck.

Prompto swallowed, feeling stuck. Why wasn’t he resisting? It wasn’t the fact that Gladio was way stronger than him, but there was some other feeling Prompto couldn’t quite explain. Yet, Gladio’s actions more than confirmed that he had brought Prompto out here for r e a s o n s. But a few more reason Prompto might have thought, though his actions were gentle-

“Well if you’re not gonna show anymore…” Gladio gently pushed the blonde over onto his back, now putting himself on top. He chuckled at the little squeak he made.

“N-No, I was going to show more! I-I uhm! I-I-“

Before Prompto could finish, Gladio cut him off with a kiss, firmly pressing their lips together. Prompto’s eyes widened and his pale freckled face was completely flustered. He froze, still feeling Gladio’s lips on his, and not wanting the moment to seem entirely awkward he-

“I gotta tell you something…”

Before Prompto could reciprocate, Gladio had pulled away. “Wh-What?”

“I’m just gonna be blunt…”

“O-Okay…?”

“No bullshitting, just straight to the point.”

“S-Spit it out!”

“I didn’t want our first date to turn out like this…But Ignis and Noct are gonna be gone for a while…So, I wanna fu-“

“Woah, woah, woah! Hold your horses big guy! First date!? Date!? Th-This is a date?!” Prompto exclaimed, hands to Gladio’s chest, as if he could push him away.

“It was supposed to be…Until you started flipping out…”

Prompto then looked off to the side, an ashamed and disappointed look on his face. “Y-You hardly paid me any attention…”

“ ‘Lying Behemoth’” Gladio suddenly said with a smirk.

“What!?”

“I watched you the whole time. That’s all I wanted to do. You’re so damn passionate about taking those pictures, so I wanted you to have a field day out here. Course I knew you’d be too focused on taking the photos than me, so I let you have your fun.”

Prompto was literally going through equations in his head to try and figure out what the hell Gladio was on about…None of them worked. But then he wondered if Gladio was the one actually being ignored… “You wanted to watch me take pictures…”

Gladio gave a huff. “Plan was, for you take your pictures, then sit your little happy ass down to show them to me, then I’d make my move. But instead you lost your shit, and I had to improvise- The hell are you smiling like that for, I’m being serious!”

“You wanted to see my pictures…Not just the stuff I take of us on the road but, what I really do.” Prompto was still smiling like an idiot. Yes, there were the times everyone huddled over to see the pictures he’d taken, but nobody’d ever done anything like this for him. And this kind of thoughtfulness he was receiving from Gladio, of all people, made his heart flutter a bit.

“Y-Yeah and?”

Prompto’s smile suddenly turned into a shitty grin. The blonde reached up pinching both of Gladio’s cheeks. “You sweet Behemoth~!” He cooed.

The ‘sweet Behemoth’, growled, snatching Prompto’s hands away from his face, now pinning them above his head. Prompto suddenly wore that same expression again as he did when Gladio flipped them into this position.

“You gonna let me finish what I was saying?”

“Oh you mean the part about my pictures or the ��I wanna fuck’ part? Either way I caught it all...” Prompto muttered at the end, now weakly struggling to free his wrists.

“I thought you wanted my ‘attention’?” Gladio smirked, now amused by the dark blush that occupied Prompto’s cheeks.

“You gonna give me some of that attention now…?” Prompto was honestly trying to flirt, now wondering how it was even possible for his cheeks to get any hotter. Probably because everything he was saying didn’t even bother to cross his mind first.

“All kinds of attention.” Gladio said in almost a whisper as he leaned down, and kissed Prompto again.

This time with little hesitation, Prompto finally had the nerve to kiss him back. Prompto would have expected no less from Gladio making it into a hungry kiss as soon he reciprocated. The sudden sign of such passion made Prompto moan into the kiss returning it with just as much. The kiss went on rough and hungry for a minute before turning into hot open mouth kisses that made Prompto moan even more. He shuddered feeling the sudden swipe of Gladio’s tongue over his bottom lip, right before he bit down. He let out a small whine, opening his mouth granting him access, and their tongues lewdly met before their mouths connected.  Their tongues immediately fought for dominance, Prompto feeling at a disadvantage as he was still being held down. And Gladio, wanting what he wanted, squeezed Prompto’s wrists with a groan, almost as if reminding him of his position. Prompto surrendered with a defeated groan and let Gladio have his way. He failed to swallow his moans as the larger man skillfully and slowly explored his mouth. It wasn’t long before he found himself whimpering and tugging for his hands to be free. Gladio obliged and Prompto immediately tangled them in the dark locks, making him moan into the kiss. Just tasting the blonde and feeling him tug at his hair urging him on was enough to get blood flowing straight down South. Shifting around to move his legs between Prompto’s finally, he grinded down into him.

“Guh-!” Prompto gasped, breaking away from the kiss as he did, feeling Gladio’s growing erection now against his own. Gladio chuckled at the sight of the panting blonde.

He then dipped his head down planting kisses on his neck, biting around at the soft flesh desperately. Prompto shuddered, biting back moans as his gripped tightened on Gladio’s hair and his hips rocked back to grind with him. Gladio snaked a hand under his shirt, pushing it up over his chest, and then moved down to mouth at his nipple. Prompto inhaled sharply finding himself arching his back. Gladio kept flicking with his tongue, moving from one to the other as he dropped lower, nipping at his belly button, making Prompto whimper and squirm as he looked down to watch him. Gladio then sat up on his knees, undoing the blondes belt before yanking it away, then his pants and boxers laying them aside. As he did and had went to go back down, Prompto raised up crashing their lips together as he  pushed the sleeves of his jacket down, urging him to take it off. Gladio smirked into the kiss, shrugging off the jacket letting it fall on the ground behind him. The bigger male had then done the same to the blonde, before pushing his shirt up and over his head. Their lips crash together once more, as pale hands glided down the finely chiseled body that was Gladio, and then were shyly ridding of his belt, unbuttoning and unzipping his pants. As he did, he curled his fingers into the rim of his boxers and jeans, lazily tugging them down. Gladio helped shrug them the rest of the way off, before gently pushing the blonde back down.

Finally having the blonde out of all his clothes, Gladio could fully take in the sight of the pale freckled body. He licked his lips before grabbing a hold of his hips, and pulling him up to have his legs thrown over his shoulders. Prompto gasped, becoming completely flustered in the new position seeing where it was leading. As he opened his mouth to retort, Gladio dipped his head down, teasing at the pink ring with his tongue. Before long, the only noises from Prompto were stifled moans and whimpers. As he wiggled his tongue down into him, Prompto mewled palming at the blanket underneath him. Then let out a small cry as he felt Gladio’s grip around his half-hardened length, tight, but pumping at a steady pace. Gladio let the noises from the one below urge him, licking around inside him as he jerked him off. Yet, each little noise was making his  erection more and more painful to endure. Pulling away with a ‘slurp’ that made Prompto squeak fro the lewdness, Gladio removed his hand from the panting blondes shaft, and teased around the pink target his tongue just left, with his middle finger. Moving in little circles he slowly worked his finger in with ease, getting rewarded with a moan. He thrust  a few times, before adding a second finger slowly, this time getting a whimper.

Prompto swallowed. “GLadio, thats…” He said in a breathless feeling the slight burn as slowly started to move the two fingers inside of him.

“Just give it a minute…”

Giving a disgruntled groan, Prompto wondered if two fingers started out this comfortable, how would he manage trying to take all of him. The whole time since they had started, Prompto had wondered about the size of Gladio. It was more than evident that there was ‘something’ to expect. Prompto was sure someone somewhere would be happy to see it, but he was on the brinks of: ‘It won’t fit.’ During all his worried thinking, he’d distracted himself from the pain of the fingers, and found himself letting a moan.

“Okay?” Gladio asked.

“S-so okay.”

And with that, Prompto felt Gladio’s fingers moving in and out of him in a quicker pace. Still in the position with his legs over his shoulders,  he found it even more embarrassing actually able to see what Gladio was doing to him, and that the larger males eyes were seton him. He quickly glanced way, before trembling as a high-pitched moan escaped. His eyes widened a little at the sudden feeling of something GLadio had reached. Then again as his fingers were noe rubbing in small circles at his prostate. Squirmng around and whimpering, Prompto failed to keep the noise in, and his body jerked as he keened high in his throat.

“Gladio~!” He threw the back of his hand over his mouth.

But the moans from him were still more than heard. Seeing now that Prompto was fully enjoying the attention, he began scissoring his fingers while thrusting them, getting him properly stretched and prepared.  All of his moans were coming out high-pitched and Gladio could only wonder at the moment what they’d sound like once he was finally inside of him. After another minute or two, and becoming impatient, ready to hear more from the blonde, Gladio removed his fingers and lifted Prompto’s legs off his shoulders, and scooted back a little as he set them back down on either side of him. Prompto twitched, panting heavy as he raised his knees. He was completely wrecked by just those fingers, now eager for more instead nervous like he was in the beginning.  Knowingly, he spread his legs a little more, knees out, giving Gladio full access. The sight itself was enough to make Gladio blush even, seeing Prompto practically asking for it. His cheeks flustered, eyes glossed and panting hot. His body made it more than clear that he wanted more.

“G-Gladio, please…” Prompto begged, already gripping at the blanket under them.  

Wasting no more time, Gladio gently took a hold of the blondes hips, and aligned himself. He watched him closely as he then slowly pressed himself inside. He looked on in surprise as the blonde only moaned high and desperate in pleasure as his head lolled to the side.

“Good?”

“Mhm~” Prompto nodded.

And with that, Gladio gave a few testing thrusts and watched as Prompto bit his lip and his back arched. He gripped the blanket tightly, now feeling Gladio long and deep. The pleasure he was feeling was amazing, and he was glad the only pain that came, were from Gladio’s fingers. As Gladio watched the blonde, a thought probably shouldn’t have, crossed his mind.

Seeing the pale, freckled, panting and flustered boy under him, Gladio couldn’t help himself. The camera laying there right next him like that was practically begging him to get pictures of such a rare sight. He gave the blonde a few more slow teasing thrusts as reached over and grabbed the camera. After hearing the first click, Prompto opened his eyes quickly, very familiar with the sound.

“G-Gladio!? N-No, don’t do that…” Prompto weakly reached out for the camera, failing to get a hold of it as he felt something inside of him rubbed the right way.

“You have no idea how good these are. These pictures might just be your best one’s yet~” The man teased.

“Ahh~, please Gladio, stop~!” He whimpered, covering his face with an arm over his eyes. “S-Someone will see…G-Gladio they’ll see!” He cried out in a long mewl, as Gladio’s thrusts became more vigorous.

Gladio ignored the blonde’s pleas, and snapped his pictures of the lewd young man under him.

“Then look at the camera for me, just once.” Gladio’s voice was quiet.

Prompto would’ve admitted, his little camera kink was fun, but he never thought he’d be the one in front of the lens…But he obliged with Gladio’s request and hesitantly looked up, directly into the camera, watching the small flash as he took the picture. After he took the picture, Prompto quickly snatched the camera away, and laid it aside.

“Focus on me with your body, and not the lens.” Prompto moaned, as he hooked his legs around Gladio’s waist.

Gladio then obliged, taking a hold of his hips and beginning to rock inside Prompto again. The blonde opened his mouth, but only for moans to spill out as he felt Gladio deep inside, only pulling slightly out. But yet, he managed to moan out Gladio’s name more than once and the larger man’s heart soared. HE spread the younger’s legs now picking up the pace, letting gout a soft exhale feeling the walls tighten up around him. HE looked down at the wanton blonde, watching how his body reacted with each snap of his hips. Leaning down and sealing Prompto’s lips in a strong kiss, he lost himself in the tightness around his length. Prompto whined into kiss, tearing up as he rocked back into Gladio eagerly. He absentmindedly squeezed his thighs around Gladio and pulled him tighter against him, Gladio now barely pulling out and piercing him with sharp, shallow thrusts. Then with just a shift of his hips, he had found his prostate again, knowingly sending Prompto into a state of euphoria. Coming close and ready to send the blonde over the edge, Gladio took a hold of the blonde’s shaft, jerking him in quicker time than his thrusts.

The intense feeling of too much had laced up through is abdomen, stringing his muscles tight, as Gladio fisted his dick at a frantic pace. He was hardly aware of the loud sobs that were coming from him that would’ve originally embarrassed him. The intense pleasure left him hovering over the edge, until Gladio became impossibly faster, punching through the tightness. With that, Prompto came with a pained yelp ripping through his throat. Gladio came right behind him letting out a vulgar groan as he spilled inside him, his thrusts evening out into a gentle grind. Prompto still sobbed quietly, still overwhelmed. His vision was a blur and hearing slowly making its way back to him.

“You ok?” Gladio asked with a heavy pant, now looking down into the completely wrecked blonde.

“I…That was...Best I ever…” Prompto said in between tired sobs. Gladio smiled at him, and wrapped his arms around his waist, before lifting him up to straddle his lap. Prompto failed returning the smile due to wincing from the sudden movement.

He hugged the blonde close to him, pulling him in for a deep kiss. Prompto returned it tiredly.

“W-We should head back now…Yeah?”

“Ignis and Noct won’t be back for a while…We could-“

“Are you trying to KILL me?!” Prompto whined. He could tell by the tone in Gladio’s voice that he was suggesting a round two.

Gladio gave a hearty chuckle. “Alright. I’ll take you back to camp, let you get some rest.”

“Thank you…” Prompto huffed. “But definitely next time.” Prompto smiled. “O-On one condition though…” Prompto bit his lip.

“What, if I still respect in the morning?” Gladio mocked the typical cliché of such situations sometimes.

“No. That you’ll…Just be doing it with me?” Prompto continued shyly, that feeling comng back again where just wanted to shrink and disappear.

“Hell no. This is exclusive.” Gladio reassured him seriously.

With another tired smile, Prompto gave the man another tired kiss. “Okay…Now carry me back Mr. Exclusive. I don’t think I’ll be walking for a while.”

Sure enough later that evening, Ignis and Noctis had returned and Prompto was as sore as they come. But that didn’t stop him from being him of course. Although Ignis was suspicious of his sudden soreness. Gladio quickly came up with excuse that they were training a little bit while the two of them were out. Ignis took it, and started preparing dinner. Though as they all sat down to eat once he was finished, the topic of Gladio and Prompto came back up again…

“So Gladio…” Ignis started. “I notice you’ve been giving Prompto a lot of attention lately. What-“

“All kinds of attention- WAGH!”

As Prompto had started to low-key gloat, Gladio casually reached over and yanked the chair forward, making him fall back out of it. The blonde now on the ground groaning and muttering curses. Ignis and Noct just looked at him.

“Yeah, I have.” Gladio said plainly, giving Ignis a look of: ‘And? What of it?’

“Nevermind then.” Ignis paid the subject no more attention at the moment, and the rest of them finished up their supper.

END

I also decided to finish up the story with a little quirky fanart called, “The Next Morning” Y e e my cheap art- XD:

***There will be a continuation of this on Day Four: Oct. 12th so this ending isn’t legit. Just for the lulz-

[lonespektr]

Starting back Vikings again randomly........

blue eyes still hasn't fucked that priest

When's he gonna bang the priest, he doesn't like his new wife 🤷🏾‍♀️

Rollo needs a win/ cmon lady archers

Stop listening to random men, every main character gets bad advice from randos

Very deliberate word choice

Blue eyes is do butthurt his boyfriend is not coming with him priest is literally staying for you, you blockhead

Men are idiots

Tomgirls trying to sit still and look pretty when they clearly want to punch people

They keep using attempted rape for her power ups and they could do literally anything else

Glad the mrs is back

She's worried about jr but it looks like he can fight brother still absolutely in love with the mom cause she's a bad bitch

But he would have cheated too soo 🤷🏾‍♀️

He's big but it doesn't look like he hits hard, he's moving frantically, he doesn't lean into his hits??

The bows are used in short range i feel like it's that accurate??!!

Nobody is hyped the mrs is home and i feel like that was a wasted opportunity

Priest is attracted to bad people

Everybody got a shower

Who ever is subing the sound effects is a fucking poet Every grunt has a adjective

Always gotta upstage your brother just fukkkin relax

He's rejected the sacrament dunt dun dun!!!

Cheese and crackers woman how many boys you churnin out

What's the science? Boys are faster swimmers so short vagina?? I forget

She's gloating

Yea no shit. He don't even like that other future telling bitch

Rollo just stick with old girl u are bad at politics

This is a very sexual prayer priest

You tryina get what by the holy spirit??!! Save that for blue eyes

Thorvard big as fuck

That boy ain't got no right being that big his parents is normal sized

If i wanted to say it in private i wouldn't fucckkin come down to long house

Who's fuckkin army is that , just her homies?? She got warrior homies?

Ah she just wanted to threaten the general community that if anything happen to hey son it's they ass

Yea those'r just her homies

Another sexual assault threat but in an unexpected turn is events his kinsman ain't down with that shit and backed her

Infamous wings pf the vikings

More sexual assault threats

Whoever is writing these subtitles is a fucking legend

Priest new boyfriend is in wooing his old boyfriend's ex wife and he has to be an awkward translator

Wack what a serious waste of ambition

Them two rando little boys already died they really gotta take the one bitch was leadership vibes

She threw away throne thrown for dinner snot nose kids

He play too much, but they are great together

Preist done diddled that brown hair plain and not blue eyes

Vikings does appear to have a strict all rapists must die policy (marital rape excluded- even that's appears to have consequences)

Surprised they let siggs go but i think she landed a better role, shes a bigger actor then all em

I still don't know which god he was supposed to be. Guess i gotta brush up on my norse history

What's rollo gonna go without his political advisor

That guy coulda had a bigger role but this was 6+years ago and he was not as big then so..makes sense

Preist talking shit about women knowin damn well he just left a perfectly boring one to be with sky eyes

Hypocrisy , ungrateful ass volunteer to help the mother of your child

Screw everybody and they mama, leave yo wife month at a time with no backup booty

Why you only slept with yo wife once? 🤨

Seer tied of yo ass

Sky eyes just move to Paris with the preist

They are doing a sharp turn with him that is uncharacteristic, they haven't done a power corruption thing or anything to transition him from opportunist to greed

Also wtf boo /This is your earldom ??? You just gon stand there?

Still holding with the rapist get stitches law

Burning cross bit heavy handed

Bjorn tell your wack ass absentee father to back your mom

Yea we have been here before, cause your dad keeps fucckin up, you forget last time you left with her cause you knew he was wrong

Blue eyes has become a kind of apathetic shell without preist and wifee no1

Um wtf was that with the 👀

Just fuck already

Can the women have a story not around babies

Where rollo headed?

This is evidence of a turning point we should have gotten a half step before this

Except she was taking care of the one kid you ignore and you know damn well that priss don't do no work and her servants watch her kids anyway

Lol whut person or persons unknown, but you have evidence?

King got plans on plans on plans

Do they just not know what to do with the preist anymore??

Hey least he said it

That was the least intimate interaction he's had with anyone

Disrespect on disrespect

I think they are going to do something stupid with her 🙄 looking forward to that

Woah full stop yikes 😬

Another unforced error. I knew they were gon do some dumb shit with her, no he actin stupid too

This really there seasons about an unrequited love story

It gets boring when the main character is white male tyrannical and off his rocker - when he's not a zealot

Mentally ill opportunist are not very complelling

I'm annoyed blondie is really confessing to a man who has been treating her like shit for the past decade because a first good decade

Unforced errors and making her stupid is something shows love to do with women

But they gave her so much pride it doesn't make sense

I thought maybe they all knew, but it's just bjorn

Blue eyes was hoping for a confession

Why do you tear me away from myself

Trojan horse is the only thing that ever made sense with impregnable walls even with that hint he still couldn't figure it out, he had to almost die

Rollo is out here now? Why doing what?

I mean tbh is a really good idea to get away from your brother

Oh so the King isn't a complete idiot, just a coward

Another betray your brother situation 🙄

Just let rollo needs live

All our protagonists are isolated

He still didn't get that confession

Oh he just said it

What was the point of that Christian coming to visit?

Lit of obsessive unhealthy male relationships

Floki/Ragnar

Althestan/Ragnar

Ragnar/ rollo

How would rollo even convince the remaining vikings to go against their own

Now we must be subjected to this embarrassment

Co Earls, this guy is a not confused about his endgame

He should have just married her when she asked

There is one asian

If this the season where the non whites enter? They should have done that in Paris

He's an absentee father but he's annoyed his kids are stupid

Floki bb hella cute

It's odd the show has isolated everyone

He's such as gaslighter

The only stable relationship is the ones between the mentally unstable people

The two best pairings were both uneccesairly antagonistic towards each other

What's rollo doing

Le sigh she's smiling because she thinks he backed her , finally someone did she deserves to be supported

But he only backs himself

Time inside learning could be useful for him

Even rollo is not this stupid soooo 🤷🏾‍♀️

Blue eyes mad that his wife doesn't give a shit about him, knowing damn well he don't give a shit about her

Rollo 👏🏾 isn't 👏🏾 stupid👏🏾

He also wouldn't ally himself with strangers 🤷🏾‍♀️ it's a repeat pattern of making the wrong allies but this don't make sense

Hopefully bjorn gets more interesting

Or another woman character not attached to a damn man comes in

1 poc is already gettin eyeballed by ol blue eyes

What old lady would be concerned with getting revenge on is wessex king who raised her new settlement to the ground

There's that projection again blue eyes

The rollo situation is getting close to puppy punching

He looses his accent a lot

Blue eyes has odd codependencies

Man has no loyalists but strong affections that look like loyalty from afar

Why are they all obsessed with this fucking guy

Predatory men who pretend to be small and unassuming to trick women

She choked those words out, I wonder how many takes they made her do before they went with that one

This descent into madness isn't nearly as entertaining as they think

That's the first time he's called her by her first name

Curious move bjorn /curious situation they pulled moms into

They make women look stupid by having them smiling the whole time while men who are being equally deceived look suspiciously but they are tricked just the same

Once again he just identifies foreigners as roadmaps to conquer new lands

Gaslighter all these men are gaslighters

All these braids and this is the first time i've seen one of the man brushing they hair

It's going to be four full seasons of wounded mentally ill drug addicted blue eyes??

there it is, that was his dream, not the crazed ambitions of winning for winnings sake

Opportunistic and talented or rather lucky is different than tyrannical and that's what they are playing him as with no foundation

I know she tired of these dirty whites raggety ass wash rags she want a real bath with soap

Random edge play over the top hair cutting symbolism

That bb old enough too...ok

The girls were ready. And he even ain't mad because she told him straight up she was going to kill him

She doesn't want to remarry, she's better boss ass bitch but it's fucked up she can't just have a decent man partner and equal but these men are trifling they may as well get her a girlfriend

Is the seer dead?

It's 13 right?

Heavy handed women freedom theme happening

[blookmallow]

so i started tattletail

it’s 

well,

(this is a Lot im sorry :’ ) rip) 

alright this is some top quality #aesthetic

oh god why is my room so dark 

and the TIGER POSTER

i am 90% sure theres something written up there but i cant read it ??

ah. excellent. that’s. this is fine. i live in the void, apparently. im sure this isnt going to be a problem at all in any way 

oh good. thanks for the advice 

merry christmas from the void 

almost nothing is interactive, i can SEE light switches but i cant turn them on :’| 

i thought this was something with big grinning teeth but then it was a trash bag. disappointing 

alright lets check out the spooky basement then 

shit. wait. where the fuck am i 

uhH WELL THERES. THE SKY, I GUESS. i m crying where the fuck

eventually i wandered back out of the abyss and found the presents though 

ah. well there he is 

man my mom’s gonna be pissed when she finds out i opened this already

thanks!!!!! that’s horrifying!!!

like ok ive seen toys that “eat” before but they’re just like. they have little plastic “food” they come with or they Pretend to eat or something (i remember furbies would pretend to eat if you press down their tongue so you could pretend to give them a bottle or something) 

but this fuckin thing apparently not only is capable of actually consuming real food but actively NEEDS it 

i wish there were subtitles so the screenshots would communicate this better but WHEN ITS HUNGRY IT JUST SHOUTS “GIVE ME A trrEAT! GIVE ME A trrEAT! GIVE ME A trrEAT!” OVER AND OVER AND IT IS VERY VERY ANNOYING

this fuckin thing’s gonna get me killed isnt it. thats why your name is tattletail you scream and tell things where i am so i die. great. great

it also likes to chatter randomly too which is ALSO gonna be fun to deal with im sure

also “groom” is a Necessity too apparently bc it will nOT stop “brrrrUSH me! :) brrrrUSH me! :)” if its Groom Meter goes out, : ) 

ive had this thing all of 3 seconds and i ALREADY HATE IT 

oh m y g od WHERE IS THE FRIDGE!!!!! WHERE THE FUCK. HERES KETCHUP CAN YOU EAT THAT. SHUT UP,

YES BY ALL MEANS 

PUT THAT THING BACK WHERE IT CAME FROM OR SO HELP ME

uh. thanks 

duly noted, im gonna take that advice, 

wait a second why’s this door open

im makin a break for it ill change my name and start a new life in another city goodbye mother who apparently sleeps through everything known to man

ah shit

my arch nemesis. fences. oh well 

but what if i........dont want to do that,

time to get murdered 

wh. what is 

,,,ok apparently aliens are ineffectively attempting to abduct me through the window or something but we’re just. not acknowledging it 

did a lighting effect load wrong or something what the fuck is that 

whatever i gotta investigate THE CLUNK

YOU

YOU’RE the clunk

god damn it tattletail get out of there 

if i dont charge it will it just die so i dont have to listen to it or investigate its CLUNKS in the middle of the night anymore

u cant see that very well but it says “LET’S HAVE SOME FUN! FIND A VASE IN THE BASEMENT TO PLAY WITH” and. ignoring the fact that a vase is a very oddly specific, stupid thing for a child to seek out to play with, apparently this vase does not appease tattletail’s desires. this vase isn’t GOOD ENOUGH for you, i guess,

MOM HOLY FUCK

THATS A FLASHLIGHT GIVE IT TO ME 

FUCK yeah i dunno why it got darker but i

wait

ah

also this is a rly shitty flashlight too you gotta shake it a bunch to make it work (which makes a ton of noise) and it goes out every 5 seconds so im just. continually having to shake this thing so i can see where the hell im going 

AND the lil furby monster is scared of the dark, too, so he cries at me if i dont turn it on, : ) 

alright you know what 

again, theres no subtitles or anything so i dont have another screenshot here but uh

it was an ungodly screeching noise

i. i understand now. i will not answer the phone again :’ ) 

aesthetic

HERE WE FUCKIN GO AGAIN

ah

happy easter

ok i dont know what these are supposed to have in them but i assume Not This

,,ok thank u 

ah fuck

PLEASE STOP DOING THAT

ok its looking like these are like. a godawful combination of furbies and wuvluvs which is somehow even worse 

earlier he randomly announced to me “MAMA SSCAAAARRYY” do i rly want to bring him back 

actually yes maybe she’ll eat him and i can get some got damn sleep in this house for once 

:( 

i dont like it 

ok great ill just. walk quietly and resume my previous tactic of awkwardly shuffling along the wall so i dont have to shake the noisy flashlight and we’ll be golden, 

until she murders me in my sleep, that is, 

great now they’re multiplying 

do i have to 

wait what do you mean suRVIVE

CAN YOU NOT TALK TO ME RIGHT NOW KID

uHH FUCK

see we just got MURDERED TO DEATH because you wanted a fuckign. snack or whatever,

i havent Actually played fnaf but this feels. very much like that only. improved in that theres actually. gameplay beyond “push the button to stop the jump scare” 

it is VERY annoying, though :’ ) 

also i forgot tattletell cries when its dark so i cant even like. just stumble through the dark to avoid her bc when its dark he freaks out and makes even MORE noise, and then i gotta shake the flashlight (MORE NOISE) to make it light and shake it continually to keep the light on (MORE NOISE!!!) 

come the fuck on your battery is dead you should be DEAD you shouldn’t still have enough power to go UH OHHH! UH OHH! at me 

[sobbing] why won’t it die, 

why can’t i just. set him down somewhere. it would be the perfect distraction she’d go after him and i could get away c’mon take one for the team you little shit 

also i cant really tell who’s on what side here like. it seems like im protecting him from mama, he mentions she’s scary, he seems afraid of her, and a lot of his chattering comes across like “hes just a dumbass baby furby monster who wants to play and doesn’t understand he’s leading you to your death” but then like, one of the other Friends said “in the bedroom :) okay, mama” when i was. in the bedroom so Some of them are actively helping her find me, tattletail seems to be FINE when im not with him and later asks me to help with a “party for mama :)” so like. is this thing trying to kill me or not 

wtf the fuck is this 

i rly dig the shitty 90s vhs aesthetic tho 

or is this. 80s or. i dont know im bad at decades i like it tho 

i WISH i had subtitles i gotta just try to remember what he was saying when i took these i think this one was “we’re having a party for mama!!! won’t you help us??” and uh

kiddo have you forgotten your mother has murdered us like 3 times already why would i EVER DO THIS,

also the weird writing above the tiger poster isnt there in the light so thats. unhelpful

i think we have enOUGH,

sighs

hello

you cant do shit to me though can you. i dont have your obnoxious child with me i can slowly walk in the dark all night and you can’t hear SHIT, so-

prolonged sigh 

ok apparently i have been MISLED and she CAN still attack you even if you’re quiet :’ ) i probably got too close to her, as she was SITTING WHERE I NEEDED TO GO. go d damn it 

[r-o-se]

Not quite 101 comments/recap about Produce 101  s2ep1

1) Starship trainees got in first and picked high seats at first, then settled to the second seat from the ground. Are awkward with cameras lol

2) Fantagio trainee Ong Sungwoo has a rare surname and looks cute. Looks a bit like VIXX Hongbin and has the same wideass mouth. Picked the second seat

3) Haknyeon from Loen’s baby company took the 3rd seat

4) MMO trainees are hilarious

5) Kang Daniel has pink hair and Jisung has funny as hell expressions. Jinwoo is my fuckboy lookin dude

6) Too many kids too little time fml

7) Samuel kiddo enters and all trainees go ’Brave Sounddddddd’, roll video clip of Samuels training, everyone look envious

8) Samuel picked seat nr 59 because thats what Somi picked lol

9) Brand New Music kids are entering, Daehwi looks cute but dumb, they all seem talented as fuck

10) MMO called BNM kids cute lol

11) Hunus A-Tom enters, looks cute as hell and gets called charming by other trainees

12) Hotshot have ppl shook with visuals and look cute as fuck

13) JJCC next, all the idols in a row

14) And noooooooww…. NU’EST. I want to fucking die.

15) MMO kids are dumb and think of things to ask them ranging from an autograph to a kiss lol

16) Some of the kids called Baekho scary lmao my buff tiger sunshine boy

17) Minhyun to rest of NU’EST: ’’We have to stay humble’’ my heart

18) RBW trainees enter, wearing green. Very cheerful

19) Feed the kids they keep talking about food

20) Oh wait they are absolutely starved

21) Jellyfish trainee Heeseok enters, everyone go ’’Ahhh…. Kim Sejeong’’

22) Jelly Heeseok looks just like VIXX N lmao

23) CUBE appears, everyone get excited. The trainees, Guanlin and Seonho are awkward lol

24) Noone can spell Yuehua expect for Jisung who knows Cheng Xiao and WJSN no love for my UNIQ kids

25) Yuehua has everyone shoook with cuteness and visuals, esp Justin lol thta 15yo needs to stay in his lane

26) Compilation shot of the hottest kids this season

27) Aww Daehwi got sad at his visuals dont cry kiddo

28) YG has everyone confused af and then the K+ appears and everyone are like ahhhhhhhhhhhh ok good

29) Average height of 185.3 they appear with smoke around their feet and look finne as hell but tbh what do you expect from a modelling company

30) “I can’t stand next to them“ –Everyone

31) A kid w a big nose anda collar from GON ent, Eunki enters confidently and takes the first seat, everyone claps

32) FNC trainee Hwiseung enters and just says hi to Eunki and takes the 1st seat from him lol

33) One of the individual trainees, Insoo, wants to take 1st seat from Hwiseung

              HS: Whats your part?

              IS: I rap

              HS: Ahhh I’m a vocal

              IS: Oh, well-

              Kang Daniel from 3 rows below: Wrestle, like a man!

34) Settle for arm wrestling, Insoo gets rekt

35) Moonbok enters, everyone go nuts

36) He takes the 1st seat by some 3 syllable game

37) BoA comes in, everyone go WOOOOOOOO

38) Ngl I’m already sick of Moonbok this is like Sohye all over they film him for no real reason and then he’s gonna get all the screentime=all the votes and push over the other trainees

39) Kahi my mother is still there love u sm

40) YUEHUA BABIES VOLUNTEERED TO GO FIRST

41) Danced to GOT7 Just Right, was cute as hell and Zhu Zheng did a perfect flip but got graded 3C and 2D, everyone went like WHAT THE FUCK since they thought they’d get at least a B if not an A

42) Second screened performance, dude is doing pushups in the warmup room

42) Dude is over 30, got his shirt off and started grinding. RIPPED. Got an F

43) The judges are sooooo harsh this season wtfff

44) Three individuaal trainees did EXO-CBX and SLAYED and their lead singer Jaehwan sings like GOLD but he got a B and other two got a C because this season sucks ass

45) Sang Adele, Daniel reciognized it from first 4 guitar chords MY DUDE

46) Trainers: We should give him an A, hes really good

      BoA: Idk how about his dance tho *puts on the most difficult song she knows*

47) Judges: We really enjoyed your performance!

      Judges: C and D

48) KAHI CALLED THEM OUT FOR TOO HIGH STANDARDS

49) And now Samuel rekt everyone lol I think everyone already know whats gonna happen here he got an A

50) Baekho said Samuel was really cute kid while under pledis aw

51) BoA keeps singing and Yuehua Hyungseob came out to dance the girl Pick Me lol

52) Stop filming fucking Moonbok

53) Cube kids are awkward but precious. Sadly not too skilled though. Got a D and an F

54) Pledis entered, Kahi:“I feel bitter about this“ me too me too

55) If BoA is gonna bitch about them being a long time group she can fuck right off

56) Kahi talks about their background, she’s tearing up and so wants JR

57) Roll a compilation of NU’EST being sad and talking about how Pledis neglected them and how they cant make any more albums and might disband. I feel sad and humiliated idk how theyd feel

58) They managed to get Baekho to cry and that dude is a ball of sunshine i stg

59) “I wanna be like I.O.I and Seventeen“ just fucking stab me

60) Ok yes please can u replay Baekho’s mistake 4 more times I didn’t quite catch it

61) Minhyun got a C and the rest got D’s

62) Compilation of already debuted contestants

63) MY DUDE FANTAGIO ONG SUNGWOO

64) Everyone are like wow ur name its rare and hes like yeah

65) Hes reallllly pretty though damn and can dance like hell. Got an A

66) Whys he even a hip hop president

67) Mnet’s prince sounds just like Mnet’s daughter

68) Idek how to comment this whole Moonbok thing lol

69) Hes doing BTS Boy in luv and everyone are sooo excited for some x reason lol

70) BoA is strugglin thinking of intros

71) I think that’s it theyre doing the boy pick me song

72) Ngl kinda dissapointed they reelased it so early and didnt even let us get to know the boys before they picked the center and revealed everything

73) Ahhhh the Youngjae/Jungkook lovechild that dropped out got an A rank rip

74) The song isn’t as catchy as the girl versioon but its more pleasing to my ears tbh and the choreo is really good

75)MY DUDE JR WAS THERE

76) I heard all BNM trainees got an A rank tbh they deserve it those dudes are talented af

77) JUSTIN

78) They got fuckin fireworks and whatnot holy shit the F rank kids gotta look out not to get shot to death

79) Does the tie style mean something even

80) Daehwi got a special platform

81) Aaaaaaaand now they arer showing Daehwi’s intro clip lmao why

82) And another BNM trainee, Yeongmin? Youngmin?

83) Lmao he compares his looks tho those of an alpaca

84) AAaaaaaaaaaang another BNM, this time its… Ujin? Oojin? Somethingn like that man i have 0 idea

85) Oh his intro got cut off

86) The rankings….. started from 88… does that mean that 13 trainees have quit bc of health already??

87) Ah nvm they showed  101-89 the last and three have left