#after some convincing of the politicans that is

[popculturebuffet]

2024 Election Special! 4 Election Themed Episodes Reviewed! (Comission for WeirdKev27)

Hello all you happy people! It's election day when this comes out and i'm okay. I'm fine... honest

Yup not the least bit worried that against all odds and increasingly deranged behavior a petty dictator is going to win the election, deport god knows how many innocent people, destroy trans rights and swallow democracy whole yup yup i'm... i'm.. fine. But I could use a break and had the idea with Kev to do a big election specail. And we'll be doing this every two years.. i'd keep it to four and skip midterms but in deciding what I was going to review we found a LOT. Election Episodes are some of the funnest episodes on tv and a popular as hell theme that can be done both to tie into a presidetnal election that year or just for funsies and can be done on so many levels. They can be a big subplot, as many a sitcom do, or in these cases an excuse for fun shenanigans and political satire. THey also provide a nice break.

So for your pleasure we have four episodes from the 90's that show both how politics have changed.. and how they somehow really, truly, depressingly haven't and need to. It'll be both a depresing look at how we got in the position where one of our options is a destructive tyrant, and a fun break from that possible nightmare scenario that I deeply hope dosen't happen and instead we'll all be celebrating Kamala's victory. So join me under the cut as I look at some classic cartoons and try not to get too depresed.

A Goof of the People (Goof Troop, Season 1 Episode 37) Good old episode 37.. in a row. I haven't watched a ton of Goof Troop but I like what i've seen and frankly when Kev told me what this episode was about after watching it.. I HAD to review it at some point. Trust me folks this one is bonkers in the conkers and it is glorious.

So right away a local factor from Slimeco is putting out enough polution to kill Goofy's garden and blacken the sky. When prompted by max to go give these fellas a talking to he meets the CEO , a sludge monster, figuratively and literally, Fenton Sludge who is livid Goofy would suggest he'd loose 3 cents of profit and throws him out.

The saddest part is the part about a ceo not doing the right thing because it'd cost pennies is entirely accurat... as is that most CEO's these days are captain planet villians. Even the ones in favor of the environment make threatning tweets abou ta presidenttial canditate or creepy overtures to someone already in a relationship under the misguided assumption endorsing a candiate is a come on.

So Max suggests his dad run for mayor. And I do love Max's position as hype man this episode: he can't do anything as a kid.. but he can convince someone he can and I love the faith he has in his dad: Goofy may fuck up just getting out of bed in the morning, but he's an honest kind guy who does the right thing and Max knows that and respects it.

So goofy runs for mayor and as a result we get a classic how to short, as he reads a book on it. Naturally with Corey Burton, who has kept the role of the how to narrator to this day, doing the narration. I forgot he did this as far back as goof troop but i'm greatful. Shaking hands, kissing babies insue. Goofy dosen't seem to get to the chapters on graft, dancing a little sidestep, or crushing your enemies and see them driven before you. He gets enough to be a compitent politican though.

Pete finds out about this and laughs it off.. till he realizes Goofy's anti polution platform is popular, and thus he can steal it and get a limo and wear hawiaan shirts and fancy top hats. He'd be a god I say A GOD.

Pete's Family isn't convinced since Pete removes smog regulators from his cars for no paticular reason, says recycling is for suckers and assinated archduke ferdinand. They buy his blantant lies about having decided to change and the race is on: Goofy VS Pete. Despite blatantly reading off a script Pete starts to gain traction, but Goofy's still ahead.

Sludge is angry and I love how over the top they play him: They lack subtley in thier anti green aseop but it's refeshing to see a ceo played as such a tounge in cheek hammy nightmare. His solution is bribes but Goofy is too clean. So he decides to lean on pete as pete just has that "takes bribes gladly" energy about him, which proper research backs up. I love the scene of Pete taking the bribes too, putting them in his pants and Sludge just telling him to have at it. Jim Cummings gets to have a LOT of fun this episode and makes me want to watch more episodes to see more of pete's antics on his performance alone.

So pete does a full 180, baby, and even does a hackneed political stunt diving into a lake to show it's toxin free and proven wrong. Oh if every republican doing a stupid stunt actually paid conseuqences for it. Goofy is still winning so Sludge goes with plan D: Frame him. If your curious plan A was do nothing and hop ehe looses, plan B was pete, and Plan C was : Find some dirt on him. But Goofy dosen'tk now what a prostitute is though i'm sure he'd be a lovely customer. Pay extra, complinment his escort, bring his own condoms, good at sex. I mean look at goofy. Goofy fucks. You know it, I know it, we all know this as a fact but no one ever talks about it and it's about time someone talked about it again.

So Sludge hides toxic waste in goofy's garage and Goofy has no idea what ot do. Thankfully sludge left a literal slime train and Max encourages goofy to go kick his ass. Sludge is ready to throw hands, only for a sludge monster to rise out of the barrels in goofy's garage, go to the factory and call him dada. Then goofy kills this innocent child with a jar of clean air he kept since he was a lad that was set up later but I didn't mention till now because shut up. This also cures sludge who agrees to stop poluting and open a ballet school.

So Goofy wins and while it probably never comes up again, is mayor for the rest of the serie sand for eons. The time of God Emperoror Mayor Goofy is upon us LONG LLIVE THE FIGHTERS

So this episode is very over the top and really fun. While the commentary on polution is about as subtle as a brick

The politics bit is savier, showing how politicans will gladly sell out their morals for bribes. It's not subtle about that either but in a time when Batman the Animated Series couldn't have the mayor be corrupt because THINK OF THE CHILDREN, the fact they got away with this is notable and it's cahtartic as special intrests have only gotten more brazen these days. A sollid episode that delivers some peak pete, a goofy villian and a how to short. Good stuff

All the Duke's Men (The Critic, Season 2 Episode 8) Onto the most obscure show in this bunch and one of my faviorite Adult Cartoons the critic, a short lived cartoon by at the time former simpsons showrunners Al Jean and Mike Reiss, before Al Jean would be god emperor of simpsons for a few decades.

The Critic is a show I loved, covered before but was reluctant to cover this time as between my valentine's special a few years back and now John Lovitz sucks a whole lot more, having gone full alt right and appearing on fox news. That said I realized watching this that while Lovtiz is a major reason for the shows success, he's not the only person and i'ts a deservice to all the other talented people on this show, who wrote it and made it to stop loving it just because it's stars an ass. I can sidestep that for rosanne, I can sidestep it for the critic. Jon Lovitz can suck but he can't make this show suck.

That said whlie I love the Critic on rewatch for this All the DUke's men is a wobbly ass episode. I remembered it for it's best jokes and Duke's run for president, which is one of the funniest thing the show did. I never really reflected on the fact it's weighed down with dated refrences, from Michal Dukakais to Ross Perot who they made funny regardless of the refrence before

It dosen't help the first joke of the ep is a lazy mashup of Risky Buisness, Interview with a vampire and rain man.

The episode starts strong with a simple premise: Jay, our titular critic, helps his son Marty win class president. I don't mind this as a launch pad and i'ts great for gags, especailly from the principal of Marty's School, a delightfully cruel asshole with a distinctive laugh.

The problem is the subplot overstays it's welcome, lasting for about half the episode despite adding nothing to the duke plot, which is more intresting and coudl've used more time. It got plenty, but this is such a choice premise I know they coudl've done more. Instead we get "marty's class dosen't want to work". We get some great gags out of it: like Golden Age Simpsons, even a weak critic episode is packed with iconic jokes. Jay assures his son a real politican dosen't goof off and eat candy.. only to think of regan

Thankfully we get way more of Duke Phillips jay's box. Duke is an egotistical southern billionare played wonderfully by the late charles napier. And yup an idiot bilillonare running for president for his own ego and power sounds familiar, and the sad part is Duke would still be a better president. Though i'm sure he'd also be good friends with Hannibal Lecter. The diffrence is even being a movie character, Hannibal Lecter could plausably exist in the critic universe.

While it starts a tad slow once we get to act 2 the episode picks up and dosen't really leave off. The final gag of marty's subplot is great, with him only able ot mak ea horses ass ("Your watching fox, give us ten minutes and we'll give you an ass"), that gets set on fire and destroys cats ("And nothing of value was lost") and once i'ts gone we get some really good jokes. Highlights, since it's so rapid fire include Duke promisnig a group of zombies "the most human flesh since rosevelt", finding out Doris, jay's makeup lady is there to find a husband, Duke finding out the irish can vote and rethinking his poster

And using the EVIL EYE on a reporter. While jay is initially happya s Duke's speechwriter, figuring he can use his powers for good he gets uneasy. This is proven right as Duke's vp candiate is Jay's father Franklin.

Franklin.. is the best character on the show. Duke is an easy second.. but Franklin is primarly there to be a joke machine. Mildly senile, Franklin's primary role is to get into weird shenanigans, from mistaking a scarecrow for Wilson from home improvment, to trying to pull a missus doubtfire to see his children more often ("You can see them anytime" "Well who wants to do that?"), gluing everything to a celing, makign the worlds first fishmobabywhilrmagig, dancing his his underwear and destroying genuica in a hellicopter with a small child. And that's just a small list of great shit Franklin has done. This character is comedy gold and I wish we'd gotten more seasons or more spotlight episodes

I also wish he was in this one more as I forget HOW late he comes in, only having a few scenes. However as typical for Franklin he only needs a few to kill it: i'm not exagerating when I say EVERY second this character is on screen is funny. He rips off his hair because he "won't wear this toupee anymore".. only for jay to point out he dosen't wear a toupee "I will from now on. He follows up a fairly witty defense of his vp run by putting a stocking on his head and declaring "now let's rob that banks", pops into position for the debate with a cartoony sound effect, and declares "As the first black female head of the ku klux klan i'd like to say america stinks!". Capped by Duke's response "This might hurt us more than it helps us." This is all in the span of about two and a half minutes and it is delightful.

The episode resolves wobbly as Jay is reluctant to fire his own dad and again I wish we'd had more time with this subplot. If nothing else than to get more of Franklin and Duke interacting as this is the only time they do all series and even then they dont' share one conversation.

The ending though is one of the funneist scenes of the show. It starts with an apocalypse now parody that while a bit fat jokey, still makes me giggle and I quoted it from memory easily with kev

You know with all the musicals based on movies these days I really would watch an apocalypse now musical. But it's comedy gold. Duke interupting the show and wanting Jay to fire his dad Causes Duke to fire him from his campaign and go rogue. Duke's whole speech is great from his horrible polices (Regan: Reganomics is making a comeback)! to one of my faviorite jokes in the series

Duke then goes to put on some leather and go get spanked, having sunk his campaign. If only he ran in 2016. If only.

All the Duke's Men is uneven as hell, but still has some of the series best jokes. Plot wise it's a mess, but joke wise despite some very dated refrence humor, it fucking nails it enough times to make up for it. THere are better episodes, but this one's still worth a watch. And to my delight I found out the series is now on Tubi. Tubi: Thank god you exist you beautiful free channel. I'm not even being paid to shill for tubi i've just grown to love it more and more as more and more shows with no other home get added.

A Head in the Polls (Futurama Season 2, Episode 3)

Honestly i'm happy to get the chance to talk about futurama more. I haven't gotten to a ton and i'ts one of fox's best shows and revisiting this episode, i'd never noticed how good this one was. This episode is DENSE with jokes. Futrama was at peak simpsons level of joke density at this point and it's glorious: The characters are settled so they can just rattle them off, starting with a scary door segment brilliantly spoofing time enough at last (A Twilight Zone episode I never really liked as the ending feels overtly cruel when the character at the center had done nothing wrong, but I like as a parody as it points out he could just lead large pring.. thene sclates it with him loosing his eyes, then his hands, then just falling apart and oh hey look at that weird mirorr.

Fry and Bender are sidestepping the ongoing election. And fry's incredibly stupid opinons on voting have aged like fine wine in a cellar paired with a very nice cheese.

Yeah given the sheer mind boggling number of people who are planning not to vote to stick it to the man and protest the fact VP Harris probably won't put pressure on Isreal if elected. Which is bad, not going to sugarcoat it. We need to put pressure on her if she's elected to make sure she actually does something. I can't guarantee that will do anything but you know what I can guarantee won't do anything positive? Not voting.

Yeah I need to take a second to talk to all of you who are planning not to vote like fry here. Short version:

Long version: There are millions of immigrants and trans people whose lives will be worse and have their lives and futures taken away if Trump gets elected. All of our lives WILL be worse under Trump. That's not an assumption, that's not me castrosphsing that's fact: Trump is loosing it, which is remarkable given he was always unhinged but apparently there is depths to which he can sink, calling hannibal lecter a good friend, dancing for forty minutes for no reason, shouting about eating dogs in a way that geninely hurt the community his running mate made shit up about and refused to take back, and plotting ot murder his enemies and drink their blood. He hasn't SAID the latter yet but you know he's thinking it an dyou KNOW he's one rally away from saying it. Even if he wasn't he's a vile racist, sexist, transphobic, homophobic, xenophobic, selfish, hateful, greedy, sad, spiteful hateful asinine creature a pupil with no scruples who knew better than the teacher and I've taken as much from him as any man can. We barely survived 4 years of him and millions didn't thanks to his turning COVID into a culture war. We will ikely not surivive a second trump presdiency that will last until he somehow blows the earth itself up or chokes on a chicken bone. Whichever comes first.

It's fine to be disapointed, it's fine to not like who your voting for. But not voting only hurts YOU and tons of innocent people your saying you don't give a shit about. I learned this the hard way: I voted third party pissed Bernie got edged out by the democrats in favor of someone who while not NEARLY as bad as trump, is still an objectively terrible person.. .and while I don't blame myself soley for Trump winning, I do still regret voting jill stein.. not helped by the fact it's very clear she sucks at this point but I digress. Not voting just to make a flashy point does nothing to actaully make said point as not enough people are going to risk another trump regime to be marytrs. Or as a wise asshole once put it

You probably didn't expect a strong rebuttal of "just don't vote man" assholes but my patience with them has worn out and it was barely there to begin with.

Back to the future, where not tolerating Fry's apathy, Leela drags him to a political convention showing off all the diffrent parties. This is a buffet of great gags starting with the presidental candiates both being clones of the same guy.

It's a gag that's aged shockingly well considering the current state of the Republican Party

As it highlights an issue I HAVE had with the democratic party: It's refusal to actually go as far to the left as it's constiuncy wants, trying to always pull more towards the middle. So the joke hits and makes this the perfect accidental metaphor for what happened to politics: the bland figures who always populated it tried to treat politcs as it always had: one party get sin power, the other gets in power, things shift back and forth, instead of "One party wants democracy, the other party wants a dictatorship". As a result a dangerous asshole marches directly into office... through the wall after killing several people.

Backing up we get a lot of fun sight gags here: There's the bull space

moose party

Good to see Bullwinkle surivived this long. I thought he was dead. The green party

Just.. never not going to love this pun. And even the antisocialist party which I'm sure is just tucker carlson's head ranting in a soundrpoof booth for several hours.

We get a fun gag with the non conformist party, but my faviorite here is the NRA, the national raygun assiocation which wants to end wait times for mad scientests and whose rep has mutated anthrax "For duck huntin" just the way he says it.

So Fry is at least intrested in politics when the plot pivots, bu tI like this opening set piece as unlike most simpsons-style opening set pieces, it comes back around. For now Bender finds out thanks to an alluminum mine collapse that the owner plans to pave over and get on with his life, Bender's body is now woth a lot of money. So he sells it.

The concept.. is so dumb it works. From Bender telling a dog that pees on him "You just lost forty dollars" after offering to pay it not to whiz on him (The confedence sells it) to his little car he drives around in, they find a lott tof fun shit to do with Bender as a head. I paticuarlly love him insulting everyone then having to ask someone to carry him to the head useum. I also love the head musuem having big named stars, character actors and tv actors... though the gag of their section being run down is one of those things that reminds you "OH yeah it's the 90's when this was written".

Bender runs into NIxon who misses his flebitus ridden body and Bender talking to the presidents heads makes him miss his own. I love his nightmare of binary and his fear after tha t"I saw a two"

A nice little thing I noticed this go round is that there is in fact a two in bender's nightmare

So bender goes back to get his body regretting it. And while the turnaround is quick. i'm fine with it. Bender had a nightmare, wants his body back, but it's already been sold. Simple, gets us along, and gets us to my second faviorite gag of the episode

That smash cut is so amazing. As is the fact it's just.. there. THey just move on with the plot with fry naked for a scene. Bender soon finds out where his body went: Richard Nixon. And look while this episode is great as is, this last act is one long excuse to let Billy West ham it up to high heaven as Nixon. They clearly loved his goofy impression of the goblin in the pilot and just let him go off. We get Nixon singing feed your head ("I'm meeting you halfway you stupid hippies"), saying i'm not a crooks head, he had to say the thing, and sweating on the debate stage as he's asked if he'd still candy from a baby. And is reminded he's under truth o scope, something I badly wish we had. I also love it going insane when he says "I certainly wouldn't harm the child". I'd also be remiss if I didn't point out the third best joke of the episode:

And just to prove their on a fucking roll , the next part has the gang sneak in to see nixon, which leads to the best joke of the episode, and one of my faviorites of the series, one i've played on a loop after rediscovering it. Unlike the others i'm not going to use morbotron for this one as while the gag would still be funny enough you REALLY have to hear Billy West's Delivery

Every part of this gag is perfect: Nixon calling Bender a "drugged up communist", the fact Checkers is also somehow in a jar and looks adorable and just how fucking angry he sounds. He is so livid over the slightest yelp from his good boy.

So our heroes have no choice but to break into the watergate. And the gag about "They give you a discount if you've been here before".. makes no sense. Nixon didn't break into the watergate. He gave his most unhinged minon orders to deal with the election and it spiraled from there. I would love to see G Gordon Liddy's head one of these days by the by. The man is more of a paranoid asshole than nixon and that's saying something: over the course of behind the bastards 6 party I learned he set himself on fire (Something I wasn't sure if Gaslit made up or not but nope) repedetly, constantly brought up the nazis ANY time there was a plan to a horrifying and comical degree, and spent a good chunk of time romaing around his neightborhood beating up teenagers. Like Nixon the man is both one of history's greatest monsters and a cartoonish weirdo we can point and laugh at.

At any rate our heroes ALMOST pull it off.. almost then fry gets caught in some magic tentacles and we get the most iconic part of this episode.

This is going to be trumps victory speech if he wins swear to god. Unless we can get Sir Anthony Hopkins to play Hannibal Lecter again long enough to get him to resign. They are good friends. Maybe even Brian Cox, he's just as good and frankly I don't think Trump's observant enough to tell them apart. Plus with Brian Cox he's strong enough to just whap him on the back of a head with a candal stick and tell him to fuck off the second his back is turned which solves the problem anyway.

Bender records all this because candiates were capable of being ousted for being blatant corrupt monsters back then

But as is the standard now Nixon.. still wins thanks to a giant kille rdeath machine. or you know appealing ot bpeoples most base instincts. Either way

And hopefully not a chilling vision of things to come. The episode itself is fucking great though: while the trump presidency helped it age gracefully it has good things to say about voting (ironically leela forgets to vote) how similar parties can be and the dangers of people like Nixon. It also has that naked jump cut, nixon yelling at a dog and going into people's houses at night to wreck up the place. It's a fantastic episode and one i'll defintely be rewatching again.

Season 2, Episode 20

So onto our only live action show of the special, and like animation we were spoiled for choice

Which is a valid stance and better than the republicans stance of "We want to tell you what to do with your body."

But Kev went with dinosaurs for reasons and i'm not inclined to turn down muppets, especially since we haven't covered Dinosaurs. I should do a block of those next year.

For those not familiar with it: Dinosaurs was a family sitcom following well. dinosaurs made by the jim henson company. It has a ton of great muppets, bodysuits and other good stuff and is esentially what if the flintstones were even more cyncial

Okay take about ten percent off Mark Russel's take and you really do have it. The show isn't subtle, but it is funny, and has great performances and I now want to check out more. If you want ot learn more Youtuber Jose has done a retrospective on it.

For now we're covering the election episode as Earl, the head of the house and your standard sitcom husband and Fran, his wife played by the late great jessica walter are taking their youngest child Baby Sinclair to get a name that's not just baby. I love how they lampshade it too: earl is morfitied it took them so long and fran recaps season 1 in pointing out why they've been too busy.

I do love how they build up dinosaur culture: while there are obvious anlaogues to us there seems to be uniqyue stuff baked in from what i've read, and this episode showcases it and sets off the plot well: the elder, basically president but in a more mystic way with a wizard robe and everything, picks a name. HIs name for baby is "Aaah Aagh I'm Dying You Idiot" Also he's dying. Sure i't sa concidence.

This name dosen't go over well with Baby. Which i'd care about if Baby wasn't an annoying catchprhase machine who should be left for the wolves. Or I guess this guy

So fun fact this guy also shows up in the opening.. and having not seen dinosaurs, I had no idea wha tthe fuck this thing was. I still don't but at least I know it's a recurring monster that's also some kind of demon that ate Earl and his son RObbie once.

So with the elder gone a dark force rises to take his place, JP Richfield, head of wesayso corpration and corrupt asshole played to perfection by Sherman Hemsley. While he'd love to just be elected elder, it has to APPEAR fair so he picks an idiot to run against him who somehow looks worse. Naturally earl gets the job and agrees to take a dive.

How he does it.. is shockingly funny. He sings how lovely to be a woman from bye bye birdie, a musical I dearly love> That song.. I do not. I mean Telephone Hour, You Gotta Be Sincre, One Last Kiss, Lotta LIvin To Do, all bangers but that one just.. isn't. Earl however fucking belts it well. The joke shoudln't work as it could easily fall into the trap of "GET IT A MAN ACTING FEMININE IS FUNNY AND WE'RE JUST A TENSY BIT TRANSPHOBIC". It does slightly, but holds up decently due to how much Earl commits to the bit and how fucking weird that.. that's what Jp Chose to have earl do, showing he both deeply loves bye bye birdie, that it exists here somehow, and that Earl also knows all the words. It hasn't aged perfectly, but Stuart Patakin commits to the bit and tom fisher in the suit gives the thing way more physicallity than I thought possible.

SO earl's family is naturally ashamed of him.. granted that's thei natural state but willingly throwing an election to a corrupt billionare is a bit far even for him. Thankfully he has a guilty nightmare that shows his family out on the street thanks to Richfield that turns him around. Dinosaurs REALLY said EAT THE RICH and tha'ts awesome. I mean they may of not sait it outright but they imnplied it hard in how the rich just want to make themselves and thei rbuddies richer and everyone else can go screw.

So Earl decides to genuinely run.. and by that I mean blather nervously to his interveiwer edward r hero, who interviews both candiates alongside normal dinosaurs anchor howard handupme, one of the best names in all of fiction. When that fails he's told by Robbie to just dance a little sidestep, and we get a great scene of earl just.. ignoring interview questions and talking about his children. Which is as hilarous as it is deeply sad that that shit works. I also like the headline afterword of they bought it.

Robbie has doubts and says a line that's just. so damn cutting and relevant "Winning an election dosen't mean your qualifeid to be president" Preach sister, preach. Earl has another nightmare and decides to tank the election.

The result.. is comedy gold as Earl fully comes out as a massive dumbass who is not qualified at all. Please don't vote for him. While RJ is pissed of that Earl accidently outs his election fraud. Edward R Hero laments that is this REALLY the best democracy can do? A choice between an idiot and a despot? Given that really was our choice four years ago, I can relate.

Thankfully the dinosaurs instead vote for hero, the world is saved and Baby is named.. baby while Earl laments he could do the job

This episode is solid. On the nose as hell but fun. I may of not had a lot to say, but I did enjoy this one and wouldn't mind covering dinosaurs again sometimes. It's got that muppet charm with an added bit of cynism tha'ts unique. It feels like a more succesful version of land of gorch: same ambition and adult audience (Though still watchable by kids unlike land of gorch), but with that muppet style

Episode Ranking: A Head in the Polls And the Winner Is A Goof of the People All the Duke's Men

Note that none of these episodes are bad. Their all enjoyable slices of election episode with some stuff to say. But they all also say the same thing: voting is important, and evil triumphs by good men doing nothing and poltiikcs has sadly alwasy been like this on some level the republicans just stopped putting up a pretense of giving a shit about basic decency. So thanks for reading and

So register and please vote for kamala harris and tim walz, the crazy taxi ticket and I mean that as the highest compliment. I"m gonna put on some leather and go get spanked, goodnight everybody!

[the-jam-to-the-unicorn]

I don't get how you can support Ze in that thing?!? Or how can keep supporting him. On which side are you on???

I'm on both sides and no sides at all. Both sides are understandable but both sides fucked up.

And why shouldn't I keep supporting Ze in general?!

Was the comment okay the way he said at infront of the UN? No. But it still holds truth. The whole grain fight benefits Russia and with blocking Ukrainian grain it also helps Russia in the war because Ukraine doesn't get the money from the (non) sold grain for financing the war. Of course, this doesn't make Poland a Russian puppet or anything. Which Ze, btw, never said. His statement was misinterpreted so many times ... . He said the behaviour of some countries is helping to "set the stage for a Moscow actor". Which is essential true, even thought Ze voiced it the completely wrong way.

Maybe Ze actually meant countries like Hungary. Maybe he didn't. In the end, now it doesn't matter any longer. He fucked up royally with that statement and should have known, especially with the tension before, that people would think he talks about Poland. Which he did, with the wording he used.

And if he really feels that way he should have told Duda in private. Send a strong worded WhatsApp or a voice message rant. But don't say something like that during the UNGA, infront of everyone. Especially after Poland just gave a support speech for you.

Same goes for Duda. You can't give a support speech infront of UNGA and be all about "We have to support Ukraine and show empathy and sympathy" and everything ... and then say in an interview that Ukraine is like a drowning man when they literally fight for their survival (because, hello!, genocidial war). And again, yes, Duda's metaphor was fitting but the wording, timing and place was just wrong. Tell Ze to get it together and get a grip in private and convince him, you only wanna help but you can't if the farmers at home start a rebellion in private. But don't take it to a public stage (applies to both of them).

In the end, I think way before Duda and Ze got involved, several people fucked up and said stuff that's not okay. And some point it was no longer about a problem that can be solved by negotiations and talks. It became personal and emotional and some people's ego and pride was way too big.

In a recent interview Ze mentioned that he understand perfectly well the tension the upcoming election causes and this is thr root for certain things happening. Problem is, as it seems so, not everyone gets that. And it started to escalate and escalate until Duda and Ze got involved into the mess other people caused.

That the media or journalists or other politicans are now fueling the fire with fake news, false informations, statements that can be easily taken out of the context ("we send no more weapons") and so on, is not helping at all.

Both sides are in a difficult position. If Poland blocks the grain from their market, they protect their farmers but hurt the Ukrainian economy badly and Ukraine doesn't have the money for the war, which helps Russia.

If Poland allows the grain on their market, Ukraine does get the money, but it hurts the Polish economy badly which causes problems with their farmers and the support for Ukraine in general, which again helps Russia.

So yeah, I understand both sides. I also understand both President's for trying to protect their countries interests and putting them first. Because for Ukraine, this is about surviving and their existence. And for Poland this is about Ukraine and their survival and existence. If Poland allows this now, this could hurt the support in the long term because people could be against it. But if Poland blocks it, it hurts the support right now and (at least in the moment) also the support long term, because of the fighting.

Ze and Duda need to come together, hug it out and find a solution that's fine for both sides and doesn't hurt the support or the friendship.

It shouldn't be "us against them". It should be "us against Russia".

All that being said: Ze fucked up. Yes. So? He's also just human. That man is going through hell for more than 500 days and has probably trauma we can't even imagine. And one bad thing shouldn't erase the 100 good things he did and said. It was Ze, after all, who worked a lot to strenghten that friendship and make these two countries closer again. And he did a lot of other good things (isn't it funny how quickly people forgot the remembrance service with Duda that was literally historical?!).

I wish people would give Ze a break and don't always expect him to be some mystical creature who is the definition of perfection and never makes mistakes.

And honestly, give him some slack. The man travelled to the UN in the middle of a war were he had to face Russia and a bunch of pro-Russian countries and their bullshit, had to try to get UN and UNSC involved, giving speeches in English all the time, holding important negotiations all while preparing the visit to Biden. And God knows what else was going on behind the scenes (Ukraine getting bombed, the war, Olena hurting herself, ...).

Critize him all you want (in a fair way!) But geeez. Let the man breathe and don't cancel him every time he isn't picture perfect.

In the end - we need more of that again:

[stevensaus]

Steven's note: You know in your heart if this applies to you or not. If you are truly doing the best and most you can do, then this does not apply to you at all. Despite two-thirds of Americans supporting greater gun control, SCOTUS just threw out -- or at least threw into question -- decades worth of gun control laws. To all of those who have stayed quiet: Every time you chose to be "non-political," you chose this outcome. Every time you only said "what a tragedy" after a mass shooting and "did not want to make it political," you chose this outcome. Every time you did not think it wasn't worth objecting to the right-wing appointees to SCOTUS, you chose this. We knew the NRA wanted this outcome. They've been transparent about sacrificing kids for guns. At least the ammosexuals will (usually) admit that they are willing to accept the deaths of children and innocents so that they can have their precious firearms. You, however, want to pretend that you are innocent. You, however, want to pretend that you are not responsible. Lie to yourself all you want. But your lies are not convincing me. Because make no mistake, your silence has allowed this to happen. You buried your head in the sand. You did not want to rock the boat. You did not want to upset your relatives. You did not want to annoy your "friends". You decided your words would "not change anyone's mind," so you just stayed quiet. You made rationalizations -- you lied to yourself -- giving fancy excuses why your silence was better than saying anything. Why your comfort was more important than someone being murdered. There were 647 mass shootings in the US in 2022. We are on track to have more than that this year. We now have survivors of mass shootings who have survived prior mass shootings. Over two thirds of Americans support gun control laws. Yet, somehow the NRA and right-wing extremists seem to have no problem getting what they want. NRA officials, the politicans they've flat-out bought, all the gullible and foolish and selfish who support them ... they all get to go about their lives in blissful peace with their friends, their families, or their neighbors who continue to be "civil." That's you. You prioritized not making other people "uncomfortable." You thought it was more important to not "be political." Remember that when a mass shooting inevitably touches you, your town, the people you care about. Remember that when you wring your hands about "bad apples" or "bad people" shooting up malls or synagogues or nightclubs or schools. Remember that your silence -- yours -- helped make those murders happen. And each and every time -- on average, twice a day in 2023 -- remember that you are continuing to make that choice to be silent. To accept this violence as the status quo. Keep your "thoughts and prayers." Dry your hypocritical tears. Make a different choice now. You have more than two chances each and every day. Or you can keep doing the same thing you've been doing. Wringing your hands, clutching your pearls, saying "how awful" it is, offering "thoughts and prayers," pretending that you are helpless as a bullshirt lying rationalization for your cowardice. If you are looking for organizations to donate to, you can find several organizations to donate to via this LA Weekly article: https://www.laweekly.com/6-organizations-you-can-support-to-promote-gun-control/. If you are looking for the spinal fortitude to "risk" annoying family members or friends, just imagine them offering you "thoughts and prayers" as they wear an AR-15 pin (just like some GOP lawmakers!), as you mourn the random death of your innocent child, grandchild, friend, or love. Because at this rate, it will not just be in your imagination for very long. Featured image by Sam Williams from Pixabay https://ideatrash.net/2023/02/when-you-prioritize-someones-comfort-over-another-persons-murder.html?feed_id=329&_unique_id=66db1342b99f2

[norsesuggestions]

The Swedish Parliement during several points during the last 100 years

A parliementarian: Is it not strange that the official legal head over us all is the monarch? Honestly we should get to writing the monarchy a 100% out of the swedish constitution (=grundlagen).

The majority of the parliement: yes we SHOULD, but it is just so much work. Lets do that. Later.

A 100 hundred years of democracy later, and sweden remain a monarchy, despite having had a majority support of the abolishedment of the monarchy in the parliement for most of its democratic history.

Parliement voice: but like. So much work! To abolish monarchy? Also what if we lose votes??? Nah. We will do that later!

[freddyjumpi2nd]

Amphibia x NB!READER:

Chapter 3-Trip to the Library.

—

A/N: This chapter also contains Abuse

You woke up, you didn't remember what exactly dreamt of, but if you had to guess it was your brain trying to process the events of yesterday.

It still stung, you always knew that he hated you, but him blaming you for your Mothers death and him punching you so hard that your Nose started to bleed was new.

You decided to take your phone that was laying on the drawer right next to you.

Some Time on the Internet surely will help you forget it.

Opening your phone you saw that it was Saturday 11AM, meaning that today was no school.

So you could spend the entire day in your room and maybe chat with Anne, to get to know her better.

You first decided to go to your favourite toxic mess of a platform, „Tweeter". Toxic as shit, but you still liked it.

There you found the occasional tweet debating wether doing something that's completely harmless is actually racist,

Or the typical tweet of a Conservative politican who thinks that LGBTQ+ people should be exterminated, classic Tweeter.

After scrolling through some meaningless Tweets, you stop at a of someone with the @GoodWitchLuzura.

Posted just 10 Minutes ago.

"I still can't get over how awesome

the "The Good Witch Azura" Books are.

Probably the best Fantasy Book with Witches in it!

I don't wanna spoil anything, so please go read it!"

Hmm, maybe reading a book could be nice for once. You could probably find this book at the local Library and read it there and not borrow it. Because why waste Money on borrowing it when it can be read there for free?

With all these thoughts, you were convinced to do it.

You stood up from your Bed and went to the door of your room, unlocking it.

Not bothering with showering and putting on different clothes.

Unlocking the Door, you decided to head to the Kitchen first, in order to eat something.

On your way to the Kitchen you saw the Bottle of your favourite Soda that you took from the fridge from yesterday. That You dropped when your father punched your nose.

You picked it up, deciding to put it into the fridge again, since it isn't cold anymore, like how you usually like it.

Once at the fridge, you open it putting the Soda back in.

You were about to take a food of your choice but hesitated.

You all of a sudden lost your appetite for eating something.

As if you were hungry but couldn't eat.

You decided to close the fridge, you could always eat something later.

Now that you were done with that, you could head out to the Library.

Well almost, surely your Father probably would get mad again if you left.

Maybe leaving a Note could be a good idea?

Its worth a try at least. Quickly you went to a Drawer in the Kitchen and opened it, there you saw many things, none of which where important enough to mention.

You just took a pen and a small paper that could stick to a wall.

You quickly wrote down on the pen.

„Iam gonna be out of the house, mostly at the Library."

-(Y/N)

Once done, you put the paper on the fridge and now went to the door to leave the house.

Quickly putting on shoes, you were now ready to go find that book!

One Walk to the Library later…

Now you were at the Library. Looking around for the, "The Good Witch Azura" book.

Walking for a bit you arrive at the Fantasy Section.

Now to look for where the Book can be found.

The Books here are sorted Alphabetically sorted. So it should be with the other Books that start with "T" unless this Library is ignoring the "T" and put it with the Books that start with a "G".

Only one way to find out. You decided first to check out if it was with the Books that start with a G.

Hmmm, after looking for a while you could not find it. Seems like this Library did indeed put it with the "T" Books.

Which makes you wonder, why did your Brain even come with the Idea that it could be with the „G"?

Eh, better to just go look for Book instead of questioning your own Brain.

After a Short walk, you reached the section of Books that start with „T".

„The Good Witch Azura, The Good Witch Azura The Good Witch Azura"

You mumbled to yourself, trying to find it. 

After a while of looking you found it!

Well, you found Volume 2-5. but weirdly enough... Volume 1 was missing.

Looks like someone already borrowed it.

Fuck.

You couldn't really just go back home, well you could. But you didn't wanna.

You decided to just find a place where you could sit down and chill for a bit.

Where you could look at some random Videos on Toob or something.

You walked for about 7 Seconds until you found a place to sit down. It was a BeanBag Chair, well two to be exact, one was already taken by someone.

The Sight of the BeanBag Chair made you happy.

They were always really comfortable and gave you the feeling that you had a partner who was holding you in their arms. Something you always craved but never got.

You sat down on it. About to open your phone to do whatever, maybe read a x reader fanfic of your fictional crush, so you could pretend for this relationship to be somewhat real even if you know it's impossible for it to actually be real.

However, before you did that, your eyes noticed that the person besides you was the person reading the Good With Azura Book you wanted to read.

Asking for it probably wouldn't help, she would probably wanna read it for herself.

The Person looked like a girl, she had short shiny Black Hair with a Green Hair Clip on it.

She also has Black Eyes, but everyone has those in this universe.

As for clothes:

She was wearing a Saint James Middle School Jacket with a green skirt.

She also wore grey socks with brown Shoes.

Pretty she was, in your eyes.

Your staring however did not go unnoticed.

The Girl looked right back at you. She had a confused expression on her face.

"Umm, can I help you?"

She asked, not knowing how to handle the fact that you were staring at her.

You snapped back to reality.

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry. It's just that the Book you are reading right now is the Book I wanted to read so I looked at you because you were the one who had it."

You replied awkwardly with a hand on your neck.

She looked down at the Book.

"Oh that? I've read that one multiple times I could give it to you right now."

She replied casually, stretching her hand with the open Book out to you.

Well that was easy.

"Thanks!"

You replied cheerfully.

"No problem. I liked Volume 2 more anyways."

She says with a smile.

You stretched out your free hand to her.

"I'm (Y/N) (L/N), nice to meet you."

You greeted cheerfully.

She took your hand.

"I'm Marcy Wu, nice to meet you as well."

She replied cheerfully, shaking your hand.

"So uh, what exactly is this book about? I've only seen someone recommended it online."

You asked awkwardly.

Marcy widened her eyes, looking shocked.

"WHAT? YOU NEVER READ THE GOOD WITCH AZURA BOOKS?!?"She yelled as she put both of her hands on your shoulder and shook your body.

You put your hands on her shoulders

to stop her from doing that.

"Marcy Stop!"

You also quickly let out.

She indeed did stop when you did that and told her to stop.

Now the two of you just looked at each other dead quietly. Hands still on the shoulder of the other.

A Blush came across Both on your and Marcy's face.

You two quickly let go of the other and looked the other way.

"S-Sorry, I just really love these Books, soI'm always shocked whenever someone didn't read those."

You turned back to face her, you looked at her sympathetically.

"Hey it's fine, just don't do I again when I encounter a new franchise that you know of but I don't ."

You joked.

Marcy let out a laugh.

"No worries won't happen again."

She replied.

Marcy then stood up from the BeanBag Chair, going somewhere.

Just As you were about to go read the book.

"Where are you going?"

You asked her, looking up from the Book to her face.

"I'll just go quickly grab Volume 2. Don't worry it won't take long.

You smiled and gave her a nod.  The Good Witch Azura Books were close to here, so close in fact that you actually could see Marcy when she took volume 2 out of the shelf.

You could also hear Marcy return quickly, she sat down on the Beanbag chair next to you.

She opened the book in her hand to read it.

You did the same with the book in your hand.

Time to finally read that Book and see if it really is as good as these two say it is.

Time skip has been brought to you by:

Marcy being your Romantic Interest for  this Fanfic! :D

You just finished reading the Good Witch Azura book. You needed about 2 Hours and 30 minute, and wow.

You were impressed by how amazing it was.

You closed the Book and turned to Marcy. She already moved on from Volume 2 and was now reading Volume 3.

You put a hand on her shoulder.

Your eyes widened and you smiled.

Marcy turned to look at you, because  you put your hand on her shoulder.

"This Book was..."

"AWESOME!"You yelled.

Causing people in the Library to do the

"Shhh" thing.

Weird that no one cared when Marcy yelled.

Marcy had a smile on her face.

"Really?"

She asked, sounding hopeful.

"Yes, really! I'm gonna start with Volume 2 right now!"

You said with excitement, taking the book, which was laying next to the BeanBag Chair she was sitting on.

She didn't put it back in the shelf when she finished reading it.

Probably in hopes that you would read it in case you liked the first one.

Which you did.

Let's see how the rest of the Books hold up compared to the first one.

Time skip brought you by:

Marcy deserving to be treated so much better by Sasha and Anne.

It was now late, 7pm to be exact, 10 minutes before 8pm. You have read all the Good Witch Azura Books.

They were awesome and emotionally damaging.

You and Marcy were geeking out about these books. Managing to develop strong friendship.

Stronger the the one you formed with Sasha, and you couldn't even call Anne a friend, you barley interacted with each other.

But Marcy? Yeah, you could call her your Best Friend already even if you only knew her for a few hours.

However, all things must come to an end.

Because the Library will close when it's 8pm.

You looked Marcy in the eyes, all of a sudden getting more nervous.

You wanted to exchange phone numbers with her, but why did you get so nervous all of a sudden?

You weren't like this when you exchanged numbers with Sasha or Anne.

"So, uh... Marcy."

You spoke, Marcy looked at you.

"Yeees?"

She replied, innocently with a smile.

You closed your right eye.

"Umm.. do you maybe wanna, uh.. exchange Phone numbers?"

The last three words were spoken in a higher tone than the other ones.

Marcy smiled.

"Sure! I would absolutely love to!

We could read even more books next time!

I even know exactly what!"

She replied energetically.

You smiled as well.

"Great! I'll show you my phone number then."

You replied, pulling your phone out of your pocket. Opening it and opening your contacts, to show your phone numbers.

You then turned your phone around for Marcy to see.

She pulled out her phone and typed in your phone number. Really fast in fact.

Once done, Marcy turned around her phone for you to save her phone number.

You quickly did that. Not as fast as Marcy but still relatively fast.

You then stood up from the BeanBag Chair.

"I'll be going Home now. It was nice to meet you, can't wait to meet again."

You said, stretching your legs because you were sitting a bit too long in the same position.

„Oh, Umm. Okay. See ya!"

She replied cheerfully.

„Bye!"

You quickly added, now on your way back home.

~~~

Back at home, you put your shoes off.

Hoping that your note convinced your father to not punch you again.

You  were about to head to the Kitchen, since haven't eaten anything or drank anything for the entire day.

But you stopped when you saw your father there.

He was holding a Bottle of... Beer?

Was he drunk?

You were now a bit scared. If he was willing to punch you when he was sober for not telling you where you were, was he gonna be any different drunk even though you left a note?

That answer was gonna come now.

Because he was approaching you.

You were shaking. You are your best to remain calm. But it was hard.

„H-Hey dad!"

You greeted nervously.

He responded immediately.

„Don't Even fucking try to and act nice with me!"

He yelled. His voice sounded venomous.

„You may have left a Note saying that you were out in the Library. BUT I ALSO NEED TO KNOW FOR HOW LONG YOU WILL BE THERE YOU FUCKING IDIOT!“

You were  shaking, tears threatening to shed. You were about to respond but got interrupted.

Not by him yelling.

By him smashing the Beer Bottle over your face.

He then immediately just left, as if nothing happened.

You dropped to your knees and screamed.

You were in Pain. There were several scratch marks on the right side and of your face.

Blood coming out from the bigger ones.

Why? Why did he all of a sudden become so violent? Sure he hated you, you knew that.

But where did this Violence come from? Was he bottling it up? Was it because he was drunk?

Did he loose his job?

So many questions and no answers.

All you could do was cry and walk to your room. Slowly.

It took a while but you were finally in your room.

You immediately went to your Bed, not bothering to lock the Door this time.

Was this how things will be from now on?

Violence everytime you return home from doing something?

Your thoughts got interrupted by the sound of a Notification from your phone which was in your pocket.

You pulled it out, to see it was a message  from a unknown number.

You tapped on the Notification to open your messaging op to read the full message.

202-555-181: Hey there (Y/N), it's me Anne! You know,  the girl you briefly met when you and Sasha were at Thai Go.

I decided to message you since you didn't message me!

Oh, it's just Anne, you didn't even properly save her number on your phone, just took a photo.

You quickly corrected that, now her actual name would be shown.

But what did she want? You weren't currently in the best mood. So you didn't really wanna talk. But on the other hand you don't wanna be rude to her just because your father decided to become a violent asshole.

Eh, I'll just try to make this convo as short as possible.

(Y/N): Hey Anne. Nice that you messaged me. Any specific reason why?

She replied pretty fast.

Anne: I in fact do. (Except for the fact that I just wanted to) Me and Sasha came up with the Idea of hanging out with all three of us and another friend of ours.

Anne: Her name is Marcy. Idk if you know her.

Huh, what a coincidence that she is mentioning the person I just met today.

(Y/N): Funny that you mention that, I just met her just today, lol.

(Y/N): Ignore the second "just".

(Y/N): But yeah sure. I would like to. When and where and how long exactly?

Anne: Tomorrow at around 3pm at the playground. Maybe for 2-4 hours? Idk.

Okay, would be better to have a exact time frame but better than nothing I guess.

You thought.

(Y/N): okay. I'll see you guys tomorrow then. Goodnight.

You were about to close your phone to sleep but got another notification.

Anne: Goodnight? Dude, don't tell me you actually are already going to sleep!😂

"Oh fuck off. I get to sleep when I want."

You quietly let out.

(Y/N): Yes iam, goodnight!

You then closed your phone, ignoring the incoming messages coming your phone. From Anne trying to keep you awake.

At least this night wasn't completely gonna be full of you thinking about the violence you to received tonight.

You at least hoped so.

[miriel-therindes]

So I know that I love getting asks about my OCs and so, if this holds true for you, would you like to talk about Lopowen, Faenel or Turunís (or any combination of the three of them)? Or maybe give them each a colour palette, if that is more your thing!

Oh thank you for the ask!!!! I'm always delighted to ramble about my babies <3

My OCs masterlist

I talked a bit about Turunis previously in this post, but here's some more about her: -She's the daughter of two politicans (her mother is one of the Noldor and her father a Teleri). But in general she considers herself a Noldo, and that's who she grew up mainly with. -She's two years older than Curvo, so they're very close in age and were apprentices at the same time, and huge rivals, always vying for their teachers' approval. -Eventually they became friends, though they were still very competative. -They worked on projects together and invented some things -Turunis thrives on being around people, though she tends to be shortspoken and stoic -She's a very commanding person, who likes being in charge and getting her own way, though she's open to new ideas. She's fairly manipulative and can be charming when she wants to -She's a very *careful* person though and through, and will always play the long game -Unlike Curvo who sometimes...lacks impulse control and patience -She's very loyal to those who she has decided are Her People, and *very* protective, especially of Tyelpe -Finduilas is one of those people. After Finduilas’ mother dies she latches onto Turunis,   and Turunis took one look at her and went "oh, shit. i feel...love??? for Orodreth's brat??? uh;; guess i have another child now" , adds her to the list of Her People, and goes "I've only had this child for a day and a half but if anything happened to her I’d kill everyone in the room and then myself. -So Turunis becomes Finduilas' morally ambiguous adopted aunt  -As Finduilas grows older and Turunis' rapidly morally degenerates and mentally/emotionally breaks down their relationship does become somewhat strained over basic ethical conflict, aka Finduilas says "murder is not ok??" But Finduilas still loved Turunis despite how conflicted her feelings are and Turunis still would do absolutely Anything for Finduilas -After she and Curvo separate he and Finduilas is the two people she has left and she will do absolutely anything to make sure they’re safe, strained as their relationship might be -She dies in the fall of Nargothrond, trying to hold off Orcs with her spear to give Tyelpe and Finduilas more time -And it was not in vain, Tyelpe and several elf children with him managed to escape and flee to Gondolin -Finduilas was, however, taken captive while fleeing, and later pinned to that tree 

Turunis at the kinslaying of Sirion from this character creator

Colour palette for Turunis

There's some more of Faenel in this post, and here are some thoughts I have on her life after the War that I'm not sure I've posted here before:

-She becomes somewhat friends with Faramir in the aftermath, building a friendship over their shared grief. He can never convince her to like Aragorn, though. -She becomes very close friends with Eowyn as well! They meet because Faenel designs and sews Eowyn's wedding dress. -Faenel never went through exactly what Eowyn did, but she can somewhat relate to he crushing weight of duty and responsibility and fear. They help each other heal -Faenel often visits Ithilien to see her and make her clothes (Eowyn insists she shouldn't work on her free time, but Faenel is fascinated by the rohirric fashions and has fun combining those and gondorian styles for Eowyn, so she convinces Eowyn to let her design a few things for her on visits) -Eowyn also teaches Faenel to ride horses. She had never learned before because she lived in Minas Tirith and rarely travelled so there was little need to, but once she learned the basics she loves going on rides with Eowyn and Faramir -Miri and her husband live in another circle of Minas Tirith, but they come down to Faenel's shop for tea nearly every day. -They've all been so very hurt by the War, and Faenel no less, but she learns how to heal and build friendships out of sorrow and find new things to love.

Colour palette for Faenel

Lopowen is one of my newest OCs and she isn't very developed yet, she came into being this February when I was writing a leetle Valentine's day fluff for fun. But she’s a Teleri Elf who was childhood friends with Maglor and they later wed, not long before the Rebellion of the Noldor. She is a poet and storyteller, but a very grounded, practical person. She does go into exhile with the rebellion, but she’s horrified by the kinslaying at Sirion and furious at how Maglor went along with it, killing her own people. So she leaves the host of Feanor and joins that of Fingolfin, meaning that she’s left behind from the ships (Maglor is filled with rage at her and still burns the ships with his father and brother. When he realises that he had doomed her to the Helcaraxe, he regrets it.) She survives the Helcaraxe, and I’m not sure what happens to her in Beleriand yet. I think she might survive the first age, but I’m still working on her story :DD

Lopowen on the Helcaraxe from this character creator

[thefoundationproject]

ok but nothing will ever convince me that mace windu isn't just the jedi version of captain holt from brooklyn 99. anything he does i can see mace doing.

captain holt seems so bland/unfeeling but acually cares so deeply and is no nonsense but about 90% troll by volume. that scene where captain holt tells jake that he injured himself hoola hooping but deleting the evidence? inspired by the 10000 times mace has done that same thing to every councilmember, master, knight (anakin specifically), padawan, initiate, clone trooper, politican, random coruscanti citizen etc. imagine the council bickering and he's like i'm not getting involved and then turns his back to them but they won't stop and it's the "look what you did, you made me turn my chair" scene.

fox and ponds fighting over blockade and ponds tried to bribe with more massifs and mace get called down there and does the "you've disappointed all three of us" thing.

captain holt's relationship with his dog-child pepper is how mace is with depa/caleb change my mind. these two will never do anything wrong ever and one would never believe mace could go full stage mom until you see them together

ponds is his gina linetti and they've got that sort of rapport going that you only get between the most outgoing, fashionable, charismatic and confident younger and the reserved, elegant, wait is he actully a droid and stone faced elder. they are thick as thieves, and can and will troll anyone that crosses their path, but are both so competent and are the best team ever no one would ever believe.

just imagine ponds ranting about all the space-reality shows and space-telenovelas and mace knowing all of them and their drama by heart and shocking everyone with his knowledge of them and his theories. after oya vode keeping up with all of them to talk with ponds about the latest socialite to marry some guy who's way too old for her. ponds knows everything about mace and can predict his actions better than anyone else and all of his littles get grumpy, old master windu as a grandfather who plays dress up and tea with them and listens too all their sibling bickering and mediates, but no-one ever believes them because he looks way too serious.

just... captain holt is one of my favourites and this thought burrowed itself deep in my mind and won't get out and soft wars mace kind of fits this sooo hope you've actually seen the show or else this won't make any sense hha but idk watch highlights on yt if you want to see what i'm talking about if you haven't 😅

So I have to admit I only know B99 from memes and cold open videos, so I don’t know many of their names. Except Captain Holt, him I do know. And I absolutely 200% agree that Mace has that exact blank-faced-trolledness going for him. I mean look at the guy. Look at that scowly face perfect for disguising shenanigans. Look at that poise, that decorum that says ‘no you can’t possibly suspect THIS man of shenaniganry!’ No, this man is a consummate professional troll and Depa grew up to be the exact same way. Which is extra excellent because Mace 200% covers for her until she’s good enough to not get caught. Unfortunately Caleb growing up as he did among Vode means he absolutely was infected by their version of subtlety, which is often rather lacking. Depa is trying desperately to fix that. It would be easier if Grey wasn’t constantly laughing at the attempts and fiendishly indulging Caleb. And Ponds too, since Caleb is basically his grandpadawan and he hasn’t been able to talk Mace into another Padawan.

I love this lineage a lot ok. Let them troll!

[rorodawnchorus]

The Devil Judge, Ep.1 Meta

(On the re-imagined justice process, imageries, parallels in South Korea and our world today) 

As with all dystopian fiction, it is not exactly a far-fetched imagining of our world. Instead, it is a critique of our society which seeks to amplify the inequalities and suffering of society through some exaggeration. 

The Devil Judge is that: it "re-imagines" South Korea today with a sprinkle of cyberpunk aesthetics (a little too much bluish green tint) and dystopian imagery (of homeless people, a very dirty subway and dingy backalleys on a rainy night).

I kept thinking it was a dystopian "future" but was wondering why they were using only Samsung Note 20 instead of some Samsung futuristic prototype phone. So, those phones do keep audiences grounded in the reality it is portraying -- this is the alternative South Korea of today. 

We are barely halfway into the first episode and we've got this extremely charismatic, anti-hero male lead strutting red carpets and making verbose declarations like "I am the power. By the judicial authority delegated to me by the people of Korea, I will run this court. And it is the people who hold this power." (Not verbatim but that's the gist). 

Then, meet associate judge Kim Ga-On who seems to be against how the system is running. He seems to be the outlier who rose to his ranks from the bottom class of society (which his colleague Oh Jin-joo says, he looks like he's from the shanty town of Seoul). We start off, barely into the drama at this point, with a dramatic scene of a kindergarten bus ramming down barricades and charging towards the Court building. A group of kindergarten children crossing the road there (I've just no clue what businses kids would have near the court building tbh). A little girl tripping as they were rushed across the road, Ga-On jumping to the rescue, and unable to pick her up in time, shields her with his own body. Kang Yo Han is just there, taking a heavy gun from the guard and unhesitantly opened fire at the bus driver who was flooring the pedal. He misses the driver's head and hits the headrest before firing again. The bus swerves and flips. The driver loses consciousness and Ga On (again!) jumps to the rescue. So, here the tone is set. We've got this "devil judge" who seems to be the ultimate modern day anti-hero who's given immense amount of power. 

Much more interesting is that in this dystopian South Korea, we've got what seems like a publicly elected judiciary (or Kang Yo Han is perhaps the first?) and that has always been something that has been discussed in legal academic. Not the idea of electing the judiciary but that the argument of the judiciary not being publicly elected can be seen as slightly out of tune with democracy. (In legal academic, however, this is theoretically seen as being balanced by the separation of powers; ie. the executive branch (=government) and elected members of Parliament/Congress are supposed to be fully separated from the judiciary and should therefore never interfere with the judiciary. But, of course, these are all theoretical stuff. They look good on paper and when discussed in legal essays but in reality, it can often be different (if not, the exact opposite). This series takes things to yet another level by imagining the inception of a publicly televised and publicly voted trial. 

This goes against the nature of trials in general because in our world today, the judiciary (wherever it may be) typically have mechanisms (ie. laws and codes) to prevent manipulation by media. The principle of fair trial requires that no external influence affects the process of adjudication (ie. the judgement by judges). There also tends to be avoidance of trial by public opinion because the way the law is interpreted and applied can be rather technical and different from what people may say or think about a certain trials, the decision delivered and also sentencing. Trial by jury is the nearest it gets but that too can be a fairly technical process which do also include considerations like avoiding a two-day trial to prevent influence by the media or other agents on a jury member's decision. (A recent drama mentioning this is Law School). The thing about this idea of trial by the public is that standards of morality can be very subjective and varies from person to person. Judgement by judges are not entirely free from the influence of morality, but the process is a litle more stable through the processes of interpretative practices, case precedents and legal theories. Previously in another Kdrama, Miss Hammurabi (2018), Judge Lim Ba-reun became slightly frustrated by his friend's comment that having a jury trial is like "true democracy" because the "people gets to decide" and he even thinks the judiciary should be elected too. Lim Ba-reun sarcastically said he must have loved every elected politican since they were elected by the public. He tells him grimly that no jury has ever found a policeman who had beaten up a Black man to be guilty. He also pointed out that Nazi, the Holocaust and Hitler were all supported by the public. 

In this series, the premise allows all of these imaginings to be realised and played out. It is peak criticism, I think, when they portray the scenes of the TV producer being excited about the real-time ratings and viewer ratings. And also the scene of the broadcasting channel's chairman dancing in joy when he received realtime report of the ratings (vowing to treat his equally wealthy friends to a meal). Even when his other friend seemed appalled by the decision delivered by Judge Kang, the Chairman could not hide his joy in the skyrocketing viewership ratings. This really reminded me of the entire Produce 101 franchise which also heralded the shows for putting the decision in "The Nation's Producers" (ie. voters) and emphasised how it is the Nation Producers who put together ("produce") the National Kpop group that is bound for success and set to receive national love. All of this illusion collapsed (and the Korean franchise died along with it) when the court finds its producers guilty of voting manipulation. The Devil Judge seemed to have a similarly dramatic flair in its emphasis of TV production gimmicks, camera angles, cuts of a person's reaction, etc. The President of South Korea (who has a very light voice, a penchant for orotund speeches and a lack of concern for national policies) and all these top 1% of people tuned in were on the edge of their seats watching Judge Kang orchestrate this theatre of public trial. Kim Ga-On watched him closely and was sure that Judge Kang had something up his sleeves and was definitely up to no good, yet he couldn't tell. When he finally delivers a verdict (that yes, this was a case of professional negligence and not negligent homicide), Ga-On was crestfallen and frustrated because it carries a mere 5 year imprisonment maximum. But Kang turns the table and brings up the newly passed legislation which allows accumulative sentence which then resulted in 235 years of imprisonment. 

This sounded very much like how some Korean netizens had previously wondered (online) why Korea couldn't have a sentencing system like the US where the years of imprisonment can go up to 100 years or 500 years. Again, this was like realising an alternative South Korea that many have perhaps tried imagining. Episode 1 ends with Judge Kang stepping down from his high seat when a victim's family member bowed deeply with her hands clasped, as though in prayer, and even kneeled to him. This corresponded well and tied perfectly into the religious/godlike imagery represented in the justice's robes which is reminiscent of the pope's robes and resembles a priest's robe, and the app they named DIKE or Diety of Justice (正義의 神). When Judge Kang hugs the old woman with a compassionate smile, teary eyed and full of empathy, he ends up yawning barely a minute into consoling the weeping woman. Ga-On witnesses this and realises, all of this must have been a gimmick after all. He had his hopes up when Judge Kang serves the sentence of 235 years. The episode ends. 

I think this series is set to be a great one. (Just as Law School was amazing too!) It has tons of stuff to unpack, lots that goes into the cinematography and camerawork. While characters do seem a little more like caricatures rather than realistic people that are properly fleshed out in the narrative, there is still promise to push beyond these caricatures. I think there is also a lot in the imagery of dystopia and the constant bombardment of messages from the government (which is often the mainstay of dystopian fiction) which emphasises a certain narrative which they want the people to believe. For example, Kim Ga-On is travelling up the escalator when there were ads of the DIKE app, ads on electronic billboards on the justice system, paper posters plastered in the dark backalley where a high school girl is being dragged away by two men saying "The government will now create a safe South Korea". That last one is perhaps the most glaring one to me because when I was in Korea, it was repeated to me by different Korean individuals: "Your things are safe. No Korean will steal it. (Not sure about foreigners though!) You are safe. Crimes don't happen. I checked and there are no sexual offenders living in this neighbourhood." But... spycams can be anywhere. Men secretly follow women to their homes and try to break into them. Sexual harassment can happen anywhere. Robbery and theft can happen.

Personally, my paranoia and anxiety won't ever let me believe such words. No narrative, self-made or otherwise, can convince me enough to think that I am in a safe place. I would always have a nagging thought at the back of my mind telling me danger can be lurking just about anywhere. I think Koreans today do have high levels of confidence in their country. Most people do think it is safe to be walking around in the dead of night without any worry. (Again, I do not quite share the sentiment.) But this is a kind of self-made narrative because I also know my countrymen who travel to other countries like the UK and say "I feel absolutely safe walking the streets in the dead of night while I won't feel the same in my own country" when those are simply ideas they've planted into themselves through the mindset that [This country is better than my country and therefore safer.] There is absolutely no correlation between a "better" country and crime rates (or potential of becoming a victim of crime). Not to mention, being an Asian in a Western country sets you up as a likelier victim of hate crime... 

So, I was saying.... This narrative of "safe Korea" is already existing in South Korea today. The need for mass surveillance or a spycam detecting task force in public toilets don't add up with a "safe country" image but the sentiment planted into the people seems to be strong despite all of this. However, Koreans do call South Korea "Hell Joseon". Youth unemployment can be a concern is a country like South Korea and a graying population, increasinly empty gray towns like the one mentioned in the series are all concerns which are ever-present in the public conscious. The mention of plauge and unemployment too must be a major concern now. In a rather similar vein, this narrative of DIKE or trial by the public through app voting creates a sentiment that people can take into their own hands and deliver justice. But what about the people at the margins of society who are homeless and do not own smartphones? What is this concept of democracy that places power in the hands of people? Is it a mere illusion or is power really in the hands of people?

..................................................................................................

(A side note on how the indicted chairman of the company responsible for mass poisoning of an entire town had brushed off concerns about a failing filtration system and the move of industrial plants to Southeast Asia. As a Southeast Asian, it is also something on my mind how South Korea has moved out of China and moved most of its plants to Southeast Asia for cheap labour. But what about the pollution here, the appallingly low wages they pay Southeast Asians (both white and blue collars!) in comparison to the few Korean expat managerial staff or engineers they station out here? I remember how I was at the hospital at 2 am and a small group of blue collar workers in their work uniform came in with their injured colleague; this can only mean they were at work past midnight due to some accident and we are still in the midst of the pandemic. What kinds of welfare and benefits are these blue collars provided with?)

[shadow-sovereign]

1. So, here is another idea: The relationship between South Korea and Japan are bad, so one of the politicans comes up with an idea: a hunter exchange programm between Korea and Japan. Some hunters from Korea stay with the Drawn Sword Guild and some hunters form Japan stay with one of their guilds. Each hunter has a "mentor" in the guild they are staying. Jin-Woo is among the hunters who go to Japan and his mentor is Goto Ryuji who is not happy playing babysitter for an E-Rank hunter.

2. But he has to play nice because of politics. So Jin-Woo is living with Ryuji. Ryuji’s first impression of the Korean is: "weak but kind of cute" and "looks like a puppy". Of course Jin-Woo still goes into Gates (with other D and E rank hunters) and one day the dual-dungeon-incident happens. They suspect that he experienced a double awakening, but their magical power detector says otherwise. Ryuji is still suspicious because Jin-Woo feels different to his senses.

3. As if something about him has changed so he watches him. And every day he feels stronger than before, and suddenly he grows muscles over night. He is like a puzzle Ryuji can not resist solving. They get closer every day. But Jin-Woo’s time in Japan runs out and he has to return to Korea.

This would be a very interesting dynamic. Ryuji as a general rule does not respect Hunters that are weak. He would not have a very high opinion of Jin-Woo at first. Even his reasons for being a Hunter would just be baffling to him.

Putting his life on the line to keep his mother on life support? It would be one thing if it was for life-saving treatment, to actually make his mother better. He could understand making that kind of sacrifice for a parent if it would actually save the person. But to make an indefinite sacrifice for a parent that’s always going to be in a coma?

I see Ryuji as maybe being a dutiful son, but not being particularly close to them. Maybe they were the kind of parents who worked a lot and thought the way to make your kid happy was through material goods. He always had food, nice clothes, and plenty of gifts on his birthday and holidays. Did it really matter if they weren’t always home on time for dinner?

This has led to Ryuji to being distant in general and very self-sufficient. He doesn’t feel comfortable opening up to others or forming attachments to them. That distance from humanity led to feeling superiority to humanity. He convinced himself that he doesn’t need others, so he must be better than them.

Watching Jin-Woo constantly getting hurt for someone else’s sake doesn’t really change his mind, either. Maybe he’ll even try to talk Jin-Woo out of it, as an odd form of pity. He can at least respect how persist Jin-Woo is at working towards his goals, even if he thinks said goals are pointless.

The conversation doesn’t really go over well. E-rank Jin-Woo is kind of timid, but he’s absolutely livid at this self-absorbed rich asshole telling him to let his mother die….because it doesn’t benefit him?? Maybe he goes on a rant about all that his mother has done for him growing up and not wanting her to die is reason enough for his sacrifice.

It could possibly lead to them discussing different philosophies later, assuming I can figure out how to write that. At the very least, I want them to have a discussion about the inherent value of human lives and how people don’t have to be “useful”. It’ll at least make Ryuji introspective, but I don’t think he’s going to have a big change of heart right away. He’ll eventually learn how to care about people, but he’s always going to be a bit selfish.

Now, winding back to the start – how does Jin-Woo get selected for the exchange program? He’s the weakest Hunter there is. ‘Wouldn’t it look bad on Korea for me to get sent over?’, he asks. But the fact that he keeps working as a Hunter despite his weakness is exactly why they chose him.

Unlike Ryuji, other people are quite moved by his story. About how he risks his life every time he steps through a gate to pay his mother’s hospital bills. How he raised his sister after their mother fell into a coma, their father presumed killed in a gate. And how he’s raising money to put her through university.

In addition to what they normally pay him to go through Gates, they give him extra for every day he’s in Japan, plus they pay for his travel expenses. Plane ticket and a decent budget for food. With him staying with Ryuji, he at least doesn’t have to pay for housing in Japan, which is useful since he still has to pay the bills for his sister in Korea.

It’s difficult for him to be separated from her for so long. Perhaps the exchange program could be about a year long. In the beginning, Jin-Woo video calls her every day, but that gradually shifts into 2-3 times a week as they get used to the separation.

Ryuji’s not happy about having someone in his space, but he’s playing along with this situation for political reasons. He understands that public opinion is its own type of power, especially when it’ll determine who’s willing to do business with you.

When he gets Jin-Woo home, he lays out some basic ground rules. Like, no eating outside of the kitchen/dining area. He owns his own apartment on the top floor of some tall building. He doesn’t want his carpets getting stained or food spilled on his couches. But he doesn’t have expensive vases and statues laying around, waiting to give Jin-Woo a heart attack with one wrong move. (He does have some fancy artwork, but you’re a lot less likely to knock that off the wall than an expensive vase off a shelf.)

Basically, Ryuji is reasonable in the house rules he sets. He doesn’t try to intimidate Jin-Woo, but he’s not particularly friendly either. In the beginning, he’ll probably ignore Jin-Woo for the most part. But he keeps getting reports of how Jin-Woo was injured in this raid and that raid (healed before he gets back to Ryuji’s apartment. He’s going on raids with Ryuji’s guild and Ryuji always insists on a healer with every raid, low ranked or not. The healer fees are less expensive than the insurance payouts.)

Eventually, Ryuji gets curious about the way Jin-Woo thinks. How he can keep going on dangerous raids to pay for the hospital bills of a mother who’s never going to wake up. That’s when they start having more regular conversations, trying to understand the other’s point of view.

They’re not quite friends by the time Jin-Woo encounters the Double Dungeon, but they’re close enough that Ryuji visits him in the hospital. Maybe Ryuji realizes that he would be at least briefly upset if the kid died, which is more than he can say for most people.

He notices pretty quickly when Jin-Woo starts changing. Not only is he suddenly doing exercise every day, but he’s gaining muscles and height. The muscles could be hidden by clothes, but he’s not going to miss that the kid he’s been living with for months is suddenly taller.

They start spending more time together as Ryuji tries to figure out what’s going on. Jin-Woo deflects some of the questions, but doesn’t outright tell Ryuji it’s none of his business. Maybe Jin-Woo likes that he’s got more of Ryuji’s attention now. (Though if Ryuji had completely ignored him when he was weaker, he’d be ignoring Ryuji now. He won’t get closer to someone who’s only interested in him now that he’s stronger.)

As Jin-Woo becomes stronger, he becomes more confident as well. He’s more bold in how he states his opinion, no more stuttering or nervous fidgeting. The change makes a remarkable difference. Add that to his changing body and Ryuji realizes he’s starting to become attracted to Jin-Woo. (The real question is whether Jin-Woo will notice on his own. I headcanon him as not having much experience with romance before the Double Dungeon incident. He was too busy going on raids and taking care of his sister.)

Perhaps he and Ryuji spar a few times before Jin-Woo has to go back to Korea? Ryuji obviously notices that Jin-Woo is stronger every time, wondering how this is possible and when Jin-Woo’s growth will stop. He’s both relieved and disappointed that he didn’t get to see Jin-Woo reach his own strength before he had to return home, almost looking forward to sparring with him as an equal.

I’m not sure about the timeline of everything. Perhaps Jin-Woo is in Japan for another two months after the Double Dungeon incident. He doesn’t go on raids during that time, focusing on getting stronger. He’s trying to avoid having his increased strength be noticed until he reaches S-rank.

Ryuji would probably help cover for him, saying that Jin-Woo is recovering from the trauma or something. He doesn’t have anything to gain by selling Jin-Woo out, especially not compared to having an S-rank Hunter as an ally.

So, Jin-Woo goes back to Korea, perhaps in time to save Yoo Jin-Ho’s life? The timeline’s probably going to be slightly off from canon to make everything work, but I’m not sure the Novel ever explained how fast things were happening anyway.

I think I’ll stop here. When I get around to writing this, then I’ll do more brainstorming. (Thank you for this suggestion, by the way. It probably wouldn’t have occurred to me to have E-rank Jin-Woo interacting with Ryuji at all without this idea. But this Hunter Exchange program means that Ryuji will have no choice but to pay attention to him, when he would have otherwise ignored such a low level Hunter.)

And a reminder to my followers, feel free to send in any of your fic ideas! I’d love to see them. ^_^

[mochuelovelli]

Some Alt. Jobs for the Kids in the Future:

Mainly doing this as just a thought experiment. Usually people are of one mind on what the kids will *probably* be when they are older(myself included) so I wanted to give some alts that could fit their personalities.

Louie-Manger/Agent:Making this list mainly for him because I recalled Princess Carolyn from BoJack and how her job could fit Louie pretty well. Ik a lot of people headcanon Lawyer! Louie, I do too, but I think this would be a fun idea.

A manager's job is basically finding ways to get their client's hired or trying to tailor a client's project in order for it to be marketable. We already seen Louie do this in his ep this season but I think it be cool if became a legit job for him. He's still a McDuck ward so nothing with his business would be "normal" and he would have to do similar "schemes" to get his clients jobs, especially if they are inter-dimensional goat demons.

Louie would probably say the reason he became a manager would be "because I've been trying to convince people I am good enough my entire life, might as well make a career out of it". Edgy ik, but this is Louie we are talking about of course he say some dumbshit.

Dewey-YouTube Personality: this is probably just a less popular hc rather than one that's not talked about at all like the Louie (or the next couple examples). For me, I can't see Dewey being anything but some kind of globe trotting adventurer who would also record it for views. But in the case that DIDN'T happen, I think he'd become a youtube personality and make shows with his friends and family. I think it be really cute, that even as they grown older and become more independent, Dewey can still find ways to bring them all to his house to be apart of his youtube show(s) where he and a guest try to guess obscure history facts Webby comes up with (Watchers know what I'm talking about) or where he and some friends try to solve unsolved mysteries or try and bake without a recipe (im really showing what content i watch).

His Youtube channel would be sporadic like, "series" but he doesn't make actual playlists (Huey or Violet do) and uploads whatever he wanted to do that week. Good thing is, he never misses an upload date. Almost.

Huey-Military Engineer/Tech Guy (IE better Beaks): I had the hardest time with figuring out Huey since like Webby, he can pretty much be in any field to me (as long as its stem related). This suggestion to me is the least chill out of all of them but I picked it because 1. Huey likes structure and chain of command and 2. Science and defense systems.

Out of his brothers, Huey isn't the most WORRIED about safety but he definitely is the one who would do something about it to fix it. I can see him making some intergalactic defense systems and various prevention junk. Maybe he works under Gosalyn's administration[see gos] or he makes "unnatural-natural phenomenon" protection stuff. Kinda like the seawalls in Venice but like, stuff to make sure the Earth doesn't get destroyed because of all the crazy shit the duckverse has. Like ghost forcefields or the reversal of timephoons. I don't think he would be a Tony Stark character tho so I am not 100% with this one.

He could also just be a tech guy, but yknow, better than Mark Beaks. He accidentally has more followers than him would crush him in twitter fights (an example would be something along the Logan Paul vs Chris D'Elia). I find this just really funny, Huey would actually be what all those "good guy billionaires" claim to be (also he wouldn't be one just as a matter of principle). Owlson would probably be his mentor or maybe just business partner.

Webby-Comic Artist/Cartoonist: Webby, to me, can pretty much go into any field and I would be like "yeah makes sense". However I know in my heart she'd be some kind of spy or detective. Thinking about her being anything else was honestly kinda hard but then I realized she DOES have another hobby which could be turn into a career - her drawings and stories. Webby is definitely a creative person, maybe the most creative so far in front of or slightly behind Dewey, so I think she would like to make comics and cartoons.

If you want to be angsty, maybe she chooses this mundane route because she was somewhat conditioned by her granny (or her creators if theories are to he proven right) to be a super spy; choosing to be a cartoonist is something she was never trained to become and yet she still did because it's something SHE wanted to do for herself.

Lena-Poet/Song Writer: okay another one that might not be uncommon but I like to just see it thrown out there. Lena is cool in large part because of her magic but in a possible similar motivation to Webby, she wanted to be a poet not only because she was good at it but because she wanted to be. This doesn't have to be her main hussle, usually I don't see it as such, but I also think it be cute if she became a new Robert Frost (this is the only poet ik sorry).

Violet-Cosmologist: Most people see Violet as either some kind of chemist, professor, or occasionally a witch. I think another good alt tho would be cosmology since Violet herself wants to understand the world around her, which is a bit different from Huey who wants to obtain knowledge for knowledge sake in the case it might come in handy though not extremely. Cosmology as field in the dt universe must be WILD too since im pretty sure most scientists know of all the magic and junk, in fact I wouldn't be surprised if there was a legit subject on it or multiple. Trying to make sense of YOUR universe while knowing others exist along with time travel, possibly multiple after lifes? Its a lot. Perfect job for Vi.

Boyd-Therapist/architect: I feel like this isn't such a niche hc, but I do see more folks make him into his own superhero and/or an accountant. I might be playing into the Baymax stereotype of robots being good mental health assistants but idc, I think it's warranted since he has gone through and understands trauma. Maybe he focuses on those who need rehabilitation or are unable to get paid treatment. Maybe he just helps those who have committed crimes. Another alt is that he becomes an architect, building well planned buildings and public spaces in a flash by utilizing his vast abilities. He might even be commissioned to make space colony housing.

Gosalyn-Politican: Alright so, Gosalyn being a superhero like her dad is like, canon but again in an alt universe where it WASN'T (or maybe later in her life) I can see her becoming political. Frank even laid out some of what inspired this iteration of Gosalyn which included notable political activists, so as of rn its not that far of a stretch to say she might be interested in that. I have a feeling its happens because she gets riled up for something in particular rather than she always wanted to be a career politician or whatever. She would definitely be a less polished politician and that be her appeal, she'd kinda be like an AOC in that regard(im sorry I tried really hard not to name drop political figures but-). An example of her "abnormal" diplomacy tactics is where she stopped Ragnarok semi permanently by absolutely wrecking their shit. (She be dramatic about it like her dad, coming in her normal President wear and then throw it off to reveal some crazy wrestling shit. Louie would also make a lot of money that day.)

[seawitchkaraoke]

So in germany a few days ago a youtuber called Rezo made a video called “Die Zerstörung der CDU” (The destruction of the CDU). Now the CDU is our biggest political party, the party Angela Merkel is from, pretty conservative.

And well as you can guess from the title, he took them apart. With facts. He had about 50 sources and made arguments about what they’ve done or not done for the economy, climate change, their general incomopetence and the fact that germany has helped or at the very least not stopped the USA from killing innocent people with drones. All while the CDU has been in power. He also roasted the SPD which claims to be the social-democratic party but recently hasn’t been all that, has also been in power for much of the past years and is therefore equally to blame, doesn’t keep their promises and in the end too often caves in to what the CDU wants. Also general incompetence. That seems to be a theme.

Now the video was pretty well researched, again he had a lot of sources, of course not all of his arguments were airtight, but he made some very good points. You’d think the CDU could use that to y’know start a dialoge, make their own arguments, or say “yes some of that is right, we’ll try to do better”. Instead they threw a fit, got really mad, made some disparaging commments about Rezo and youtubers in general. (they also released a 12 page open letter, that i haven’t read except for a few quotes (that disparage youtubers and claim that the CDU deals in trust.... right)

Anyway today was the european election and the CDU lost quite a bit. Especially among voters under 30 (SPD lost a lot too). And I’d hope that they take that as a sign that they should change what they’re doing, because when the main people who vote for you are people older than 70, you’re eventually gonna have a problem. But I can already see them claiming that Rezo used his fame to influence poor young voters who would otherwise surely have voted CDU. Because that’s absolutely what happened.

I think what Rezo did, was maybe convince some more people to actually go vote. And maybe some kids <18 to tell their parents to not vote CDU. But his video didn’t suddenly make young people hate them. We already did that before Rezo, he just summed up all the reasons we do.

The hashtag #niemehrcdu (never again cdu) was already trending before Rezo. It trended every time a CDU politican claimed that all the mails he got about article 13 were bots, every time they said the friday for future kids should protest after school, not miss school for it, every time they said that the kids didn’t know what they were talking about, that they were instrumentalised or that the thousands of young people on the streets had been payed to be there or that they should leave this kind of thing to the professionals (no wait. that was Christian Lindner from the FDP.... well we don’t exactly like him either).

The CDU ignored us and pretended everything we do doesn’t count, isn’t true, isn’t right or is just fake news (yes. they used #fakenews to talk about Rezo’s video... did i mention the 50 sources?).

They will blame Rezo for this. They will keep infantilising young voters and soon to be voters, keep pretending that we were instrumentalised, that we can’t think for ourselves. That we don’t count.

Well our green party got around 21% and is the new second biggest party (SPD fell to around 15) The only reason green isn’t above even the CDU is that old voters outnumber young voters in germany. They will die though. And the CDU will die with them.

Sadly by that time it’s probably gonna be too late for our planet.

[harley4l]

Chapter 10: Family stands together

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” ― Eleanor Roosevelt, This is My Story

Beginning / Previous / Next 

A disappointment, as usual, his father had muttered under his breath every so often after Rocco had come home from school bruised and crying because he let his classmates beat him up again. Crybaby, they taunted him with wide sneers and eyes full of with callous glee. Little Mama’s Boy.

I’m not a Mama’s boy!, Rocco always insisted, their laughter swarming in his ears. His mother had wished for a daughter she could groom into a miniature version of herself, not a frail, cowardly son who could barely stand up against his older brothers. From day one, he’d been their punching bag, their prey to test the art of intimidation until they were old enough to inherit their father’s drug empire. When he was too young to properly understand what exactly his father’s legacy was, he’d asked Enzo and Rafael about it. His brothers had exchanged looks and smirked at each other before towering over Rocco. Dad is selling lots of candy, which makes other people happy, Enzo teased, mimicking a baby’s voice. Except if you’re eating to much candy, you’ll die! Rafel added with a chuckle. Better watch out for people giving you candy, it’ll kill you. Bring it to me and Enzo first, we’re testing it for poison. Timid and confused, Rocco had glanced from one brother to the other. But won’t the candy hurt you too? Hearing this, Enzo and Rafael had broken out into resounding laughter and slapped each other’s backs. Don’t worry about us, sissy, Rafael all but yelled. It’s only killing the weak pussies!

Back then Rocco hadn’t yet realized it how unwanted he was, but his family had put in the effort to make it clear over the following years. Dude, what a pantywaist, Rafael had snarled on an evening the three brothers were at home alone and they had watched a slasher movie on TV. Enzo and Rafael giggled when the killer started chasing his victims through the woods and rammed his chainsaw through their torsos, causing their guts to spill out – but Rocco had started to cry. Annoyed with his whining, his brothers had grabbed his arms and legs and dragged him downstairs into the basment, looking the door behind him. Rocco had sobbed and banged his fists against the solid door and begged for them to let him out. We’re only protecting you from the killer, Rocco! Enzo rasped behind the door. He’s coming for yooouuuu! Rocco screamed and screamed until his throat was sore and his knuckles were bruised from banging. Many hours later his parents had come down and unlocked the door, their faces twisting in disapproval at the sight of Rocco’s face which was swollen from crying. When they called Enzo and Rafael out of bed and asked why they’d left their younger brother alone in the basement for hours, Rafael made an innocent face. Because he’s weak, dad! Enzo and I, we were just trying to make a man out of him! Their father had sent the two back to bed without punishment.

With the years the brothers grew older, and with age they grew more hostile. They weren’t resorting to pranks to maltreat Rocco any longer, they just beat him up when he annoyed them and told Rocco he deserved this. Crazy as it was, they almost seemed to view it as a challenge. Fight back, Rafael coerced him after he’d destroyed Rocco’s solar system project for school and kicked him in the side when he scrambled to pick up the shambles. Fight back, FIGHT BACK! But Rocco didn’t know how. He'd always looked pathetic next to Enzo, the smartass brain of their family and Rafael, his father’s fierce and charming golden boy who could do nothing wrong. For the son of an infamous mafioso, Rocco admittedly had no qualities worth mentioning. He’d ― very briefly ― enjoyed painting with watercolor when he was nine or ten years old, but he gave up on the hobby after his siblings discovered his art hidden at the back of his wardrobe and boxed holes through the canvas’. Looks better that way, Enzo said when Rocco found the paintings completely destroyed. Afterwards, Rocco tried out boxing at school, but he was a hopeless case at sports and the trainer critiziced his moves were clumsy and weak.

After his brothers left to attend college, Rocco stopped talking to them for years. They rarely came home to visit and when they did he was basically air to them. Enzo studied history and Rafael economics. Both graduated with honors and soon afterwards Enzo got married to his wife Blaise and had Tessa, Rafael got married to Carol and they had Eleanor, Kara and Miranda. Rocco on the other hand was lucky to even graduate high school, seeing how badly his grades had dropped over the years. His teachers often complained that Rocco was distracted at school and didn’t do his homework, which was true in a way ― he was usually under too much stress to concentrate on homework. With grades as disastrous as his own, college plans were cancelled and he started out infinitely low on the career ladder, working as a tough guy in the criminal career in hopes of supporting his father someday. He’d lost count of how many women he dated up to that point ― since high school his girlfriends they had come and gone. He longed for a stable relationship such as his brothers had, but it seemed no woman could endure Rocco for long. They all insisted it wasn’t his fault that the relationship failed ― then in the same breath had criticized Rocco for shutting out emotions, not being tender, distanced, overall not husband material. It was almost funny after he’d spent all his life trying to be strong and not show his his emotions because in his family’s eyes emoting equalled weakness. He didn’t know how to open his heart anymore.

This november, Rafel had hosted a grand gala dinner at his house ― a celebration for his newly secured business deal with Nicholas Prescott, an influental politican and the richest man in all of Brindleton Bay. After they’d quaffed a considerable amount of liquor, Rafael led Rocco into his office and sorted the family pictures on the shelves, most of them showed little Miranda and the twins when they were younger. Then he’d opened a drawer and pulled out a frame showing a woman Rocco had never seen before. She was heartbreakingly beautiful, her lips a velvet red, her eyes a sparkling turquoise and her hair a curtain of platinum. Rocco was about to ask who she was, but his brother answered the thought before he got the chance to upen up his mouth. This is Patricia Prescott. Isn’t she the most gorgeous gem you’ve seen, little brother? Rocco shifted uncomfortably on his spot by the door frame, but Rafael went on, apparently a lot more drunk than he’d realized earlier. Weird, disjointed talk about how Nicholas was the most gullible fool Rafael had ever met, how empowering it felt to woo Nick’s wife behind his back. How he wished Patricia would go ahead and divorce her husband, so that their family could be complete. Rocco was not about to question what this bullshit meant, but the longer his brother kept on talking the more infuriated Rocco became. Their father’s business ― no, their family legacy ― relied heavily on Rafael’s business deals with Nicholas Prescott. He couldn’t believe his irresponsible brother was risking it all to mess around with Prescott’s wife! Losing Prescott’s financial help could very well push them into ruin. The business hadn’t exactly run smoothly after the old man retired and left Rafael in charge ― who messed up more deals with potential partners than he secured! Rafael simply didn’t have the brains Enzo could have offered, or the strategic talent Rocco had proclaimed for himself as a hacker over these past years.

A few hours after this confusing, aggravating conversation, Rafael seemed to have sobered up enough to realize who he'd been talking to. He approached Rocco, asking him to keep the newly aquired knowledge about his affair with Prescott’s wife to himself. Their father mustn’t know about this. Sure, he and Rocco have had their troubles with each other in the past, but that was long ago ― everything was forgiven and forgotten, right?

Rocco wished he had the courage to reply that nothing was forgiven. Didn’t his brother realize how shitty his behavior had been, how badly he'd messed Rocco up back when he was small and defenseless? No, this time Rocco was in charge ...  and he wanted to make Rafael pay. He wanted to punish him a hundred times worse, wanted to make him realize how strong and capable inferior little Rocco had become. They never took him serious until they all came crawling to him and asked for favors. Not so long ago, his niece had asked for his help to scare off some boys from school who followed her around. Nelly ― or was that Kara? He never bothered to try and tell them apart ― was always convinced someone was out to get her, although Rocco long suspected all of Rafael’s kids had some screws loose. But Nelly was by far the worst brat amongst them, the one always strutting around with a smug expression, acting like she was some sort of sovereignty. After Enzo declined his father’s offer to take over the company, Rocco should have been the one to be put in charge ― he had grown up to be far more qualified than both his brothers. Instead his father had chosen Nelly as his heiress, a naive little school girl, who had never contributed to anything. It wasn’t fair. It just wasn’t fair and someone had to pay the price for all the ways and years Rocco’s family had wronged him. If that someone needed to be Nelly, then so shall be it. The only thing Rocco knew for certain was that he would not be overlooked, or trampled over ― or underestimated ― ever again.

Next Chapter: Two can keep a secret ...

[alodginghouse-blog]

conlon family headcanons-

bridget and patrick- pat- conlon were married approx two months, and she was barely a month and a half pregnant with her first child when pat first cheated on her. he was a serial philanderer, which was ultimately his downfall.

ma conlon’s mother was irish, but her father was russian. she has family in county westmeath, near mullingar, and in dublin, and family in moscow. there are elements of her family who are not... ahem, in business that are above board, lets say.

pat has very little contact with his family back in the old country, but they’re from the area around kilkenny. he does have three older brothers, and two younger, and everything he managed to scrape together for himself and his family was done BY himself- with the assistance of one of the local saloon owners/politicans, deagland fitzgerald. deagland’s youngest brother, seamus, is a friend/mentor to spot, and a mid-level member of the fitzgerald gang, who run rackets from gun running to drug importing, to nominal ownership of several businesses where the company of women can be obtained for a price, including the dancing dove.

that said, while spot does enjoy the company of the ladies (and as long as nobody finds out, the gents) who seem to find him alluring, he does have a favorite at the above mentioned establishment- trixie. (trixie thinks she’s in love with him. he likes that she looks innocent enough that he can still feel like he’s corrupting her.)

mel loves her laudanum. it was first proscribed when she was a young teenager and had very bad cramping for a bit. when her mother tried to stop her from taking it, she found other ways to get her hands on it. easy enough, where they live.

when spot was about 15 and mel just turned 14, a woman approached pat conlon in the street with a 12 year old girl in tow. her name was mariella reuda, and the girl, consuela reuda was her daughter by pat. she’d been shipped home to mexico by her brothers when they found her pregnant, her daughter given to a cousin to raise, but mariella had stolen her when little ella was about 6, and hauled them both first to california, and then slowly across the country, back to new york, convinced that if she could just tell pat that she’d been pregnant, and had brought his daughter to him, that he would leave the “bitch he’d married” and marry her instead. that’s absolutely not what happened. pat laughed at her, and told her he couldn’t even remember her. mariella shot him dead between the eyes with a derringer whose bullet never managed to leave his skull after entering, knocking around and leaving him still breathing but clearly not alive. mikey- the eldest conlon-, ing, spot, and mel were all there, and mel’s screaming brought almost everyone in a three block radius to see what the hell was happening. bridget was at home with the twins, pregnant with her last child. mariella was arrested without resisting, after she shot pat again in the groin, the blood loss from which is what actually killed him. she was hung about a year later. little ella was left to an orphanage, but she ran away fairly quickly. even ma conlon’s big heart couldn’t see big enough to take the girl in. she’s a little furious shadow that will some day cause spot a lot of trouble.

(ella may be added at a later date. her fc is alexa penavega.)

[stevensaus]

When You Prioritize Someone's Comfort Over Another Person's Murder.

Steven's note: You know in your heart if this applies to you or not. If you are truly doing the best and most you can do, then this does not apply to you at all. Despite two-thirds of Americans supporting greater gun control, SCOTUS just threw out -- or at least threw into question -- decades worth of gun control laws. To all of those who have stayed quiet: Every time you chose to be "non-political," you chose this outcome. Every time you only said "what a tragedy" after a mass shooting and "did not want to make it political," you chose this outcome. Every time you did not think it wasn't worth objecting to the right-wing appointees to SCOTUS, you chose this. We knew the NRA wanted this outcome. They've been transparent about sacrificing kids for guns. At least the ammosexuals will (usually) admit that they are willing to accept the deaths of children and innocents so that they can have their precious firearms. You, however, want to pretend that you are innocent. You, however, want to pretend that you are not responsible. Lie to yourself all you want. But your lies are not convincing me. Because make no mistake, your silence has allowed this to happen. You buried your head in the sand. You did not want to rock the boat. You did not want to upset your relatives. You did not want to annoy your "friends". You decided your words would "not change anyone's mind," so you just stayed quiet. You made rationalizations -- you lied to yourself -- giving fancy excuses why your silence was better than saying anything. Why your comfort was more important than someone being murdered.

There were 647 mass shootings in the US in 2022. We are on track to have more than that this year. We now have survivors of mass shootings who have survived prior mass shootings. Over two thirds of Americans support gun control laws. Yet, somehow the NRA and right-wing extremists seem to have no problem getting what they want. NRA officials, the politicans they've flat-out bought, all the gullible and foolish and selfish who support them ... they all get to go about their lives in blissful peace with their friends, their families, or their neighbors who continue to be "civil." That's you. You prioritized not making other people "uncomfortable." You thought it was more important to not "be political." Remember that when a mass shooting inevitably touches you, your town, the people you care about. Remember that when you wring your hands about "bad apples" or "bad people" shooting up malls or synagogues or nightclubs or schools. Remember that your silence -- yours -- helped make those murders happen. And each and every time -- on average, twice a day in 2023 -- remember that you are continuing to make that choice to be silent. To accept this violence as the status quo. Keep your "thoughts and prayers." Dry your hypocritical tears. Make a different choice now. You have more than two chances each and every day. Or you can keep doing the same thing you've been doing. Wringing your hands, clutching your pearls, saying "how awful" it is, offering "thoughts and prayers," pretending that you are helpless as a bullshirt lying rationalization for your cowardice.

If you are looking for organizations to donate to, you can find several organizations to donate to via this LA Weekly article: https://www.laweekly.com/6-organizations-you-can-support-to-promote-gun-control/. If you are looking for the spinal fortitude to "risk" annoying family members or friends, just imagine them offering you "thoughts and prayers" as they wear an AR-15 pin (just like some GOP lawmakers!), as you mourn the random death of your innocent child, grandchild, friend, or love. Because at this rate, it will not just be in your imagination for very long. Read the full article

[zampanobra]

Knowledge of Power

I was reading an article¹ on QAnon, and all I could think was “I get it.” Not the bit about a secret cabal, because that requires a lot more faith in self-interested people’s ability to work together and the egotistical’s ability to keep their actions secret. Instead, there’s probably some comfort to the idea that this kind of over-arching control is possible, even if you believe it’s horrible. It’s better to have a target, a specific cause for dissatisfaction than to have to rage against the universe itself.

For me, the appeal would be all about secret knowledge. I hoard books, PDFs, text—in other words, knowledge. I can’t ultimately distinguish between curiosity and paranoia. Information is weaponized and turned against us all the time, and so it’s much easier to trust a person when you’re smarter than they are. Often it’s politicans trying to use history to legitimize the indefensible, or someone on YouTube trying to convince us that they’ve figured out some new law of the universe. So I spend much of my time armoring myself, layer after layer.

Nostalgia is another avenue of attack. Whether it’s for the 1950s or the 1980s, it tends to display a very different view of society than was actually the case. Nostalgia by its nature is very selective, and tends to enhance our tendency to remember things fondly while editing out the negatives. But ultimately these nostalgic pseudo-memories can start to overwrite real history. As the host of a podcast on this subject recently mentioned, it’s important for us to be aware of the plot to the new Cold-War era Call of Duty because it won’t be long until that’s how a lot of people view the real events.²

This isn’t a new phenomenon: trying to edit history to push an agenda is as old as historiography itself. It’s the reason so many of us think that Nero actually played a fiddle while Rome burned (or was otherwise a degenerate), not realizing that much of the history of his reign was written by political opponents. In the United States, the Lost Cause narrative of the Civil War, which says that Secession was more about political rights and self-governance than what it was actually about (slavery), remains a significant part of the popular conception of the war. See also the myth of the clean Wehrmacht during World War Two.³

That I’m aware of these things, is a product of a great deal of effort. It means that I look up claims before I believe them, and have to spend a lot of time and energy on making sure that a narrative I’m being told is actually accurate. It’s fact checking cranked up a couple notches, because it’s usually harder than just checking a newspaper to see whether x actually happened. And this is of course why these distorted views can spread so quickly: we have to be willing and able to do the research to begin with, which is harder still (as we now know) when we’re exposed to something that reinforces what we already think.

In addition to recognizing false narratives, it’s worth thinking about what those stories tell us about our own wishes. I’ve found that if I start fantasizing about a certain thing, it’s not necessarily reflective of a desire for that specific thing, but instead my mind is telling me in a roundabout way that there’s something I’m missing. So if I imagine myself changing to job x, this doesn’t per se suggest that I want to do that job specifically, but instead may be showing me something about my current situation that I want to change. The same thing applies to nostalgia generally, and so it’s worth thinking about what differences are being imagined to see what the actual goal is.

There’s another blind spot to be worried about, though. Even if we devote the time and energy to verifying a given narrative, this still controls what we think about and how we see the world. If I tell you “don’t think of an elephant,” what’s the first thing you think of? Thus by denying or rebutting an argument, you’re still implicitly orienting your thinking along the same axis as the other person, even if you’re coming at it from the opposite direction. This is still limiting in significant ways, and is far harder to see and address. One thing I’ve found is just to seek out things that few people are interested in. If there’s an area of history, for example, that isn’t part of popular culture or discussion, that is the one I’m seeking out. For example, how many non-historians know that the richest person in history was (probably) a west African king in the middle ages?⁴

The reasons I originally gave for my data addiction are true as far as they go, but I do wonder what else is going on. I think another factor is this hope that one day it’ll matter that I know what I know, even if it’s not clear how; sort of a rainy-day stockpile. This hasn’t really proven to be the case, and as I get older, I find myself increasingly frustrated that I don’t really have more to do. I mean, I have hobbies and activities that I enjoy, but the thing I get paid to do is not in either category. Reading books and playing games all the time would be more satisfying if either one connected to anything, but they don’t. And it’s hard to take any particular pride in the number of hours I’ve devoted to my Steam library.

I’d prefer to think Camus is right versus someone more nihilistic, but I’m certainly struggling to find happiness while pushing my rock.

.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.

¹ https://cryptome.org/2020/12/QAnon-Posts.pdf

² https://trashfuturepodcast.podbean.com/e/nostalgia-in-place-of-a-working-society-feat-grafton-tanner/

³ For more, see https://soundcloud.com/user-798629330/episode-115-the-myth-of-the-clean-wehrmacht

⁴ Musa I (1279 – c. 1337) is said to have carried more than 50,000 pounds of gold with him on pilgrimage to Mecca, enough to cause a 10-year gold recession in north Africa and the Middle East.

[stilesssolo]

Hey, I love your Star Wolves stories, I've just binge read what you've done so far and you've adapted them really well!! So I don't know how far into the future you've imagined these after RotJ... but pretty pretty pretty please can we say Stiles and Lydia follow the mostly-happy-ever-after of the Legends instead of the new canon?? I mostly enjoy the sequels but the way Han and Leia ended up is too hard to swallow 😂 😭

Thank you so much; I’m so glad you’re loving them!!! Star Wars and Stydia are like my two favorite things so combining them was just irrisistable. I’m really happy you’re enjoying the series!!

As for the Stydia ending— yeah, okay, I agree with you 100%. I really like the new trilogy (uh, I’m using “really like” loosely for TLJ, but) but Han and Leia’s ending was HEARTBREAKING. Like I GET IT Harrison Ford you want to be as far away from Star Wars as possible but COME ON NOW don’t take that out on us. And I guess their Legends ending is… sort of happier because they’re together, but one of their kids turns evil and one of them dies and then Jaina has to KILL Jacen like I CANT PUT STYDIA THROUGH THAT. SO, back when I was reasonably convinced I was going to write the sequel trilogy in this universe as well before I realized I have neither the time or dedication for that, I came up with this ending that I am going to now info dump on you, so you will know their true canon ending in your heart:

They follow, like, the RELATIVE plotline of the sequel trilogy, although they’ve got a few years in between really winning the war and having a kid, where they live on Coruscant and Lydia works as a senator and helps form the New Republic with Deaton. Stiles does NOT do this whole goes-off-to-be-a-racer-pilot-on-the-other-side-of-the-galaxy thing that Han pulls before Bloodline, and although their kid does get pulled into Snoke’s grips, it’s not because Stiles and Lydia are… bad parents?? (I HATE that part of the new trilogy. As if Han, who grew up on the streets without a family, would never be around for his kid, and that Leia, whose parents were successful politicans that loved her more than anything, would throw herself so far into her work she’d forget about her son.) Also that whole Luke-tries-to-kill-Ben-because-he’s-too-powerful thing would NEVER happen; there would have to be some other catalyst where their son falls to the dark side and Scott feels like he’s failed and goes to Ahch-To. I don’t think it’s in Scott’s character (or Luke’s, tbh) to doubt the good in people— that’s what makes him such a hero; he always sees the good in people. He’s probably sense the darkness in Stydia’s kid and try to help him, thus causing the kid to lash out and burn down the temple.

So, I think after their kid falls to the dark side, that instead of Stydia separating like Han and Leia do in TFA, they’d be SORT of separated but ACTUALLY working together as the world’s best political power couple to take down the First Order (Stiles is the brains. He hates politics.) Stiles has been smuggling weapons and X Wings and credits to help the Resistance, all while also looking for the map to Scott. Lydia, meanwhile, has been leading the Reistance after the New Republic has basically crumbled without Deaton there (also idk if you’ve read Bloodline but there’s no way in HELL Lydia would keep the Vader secret from a) her kid and b) the galaxy. I think Lydia would come clean about that pretty quickly, and her kid would know about his grandparents from a very young age.) Stiles and Lydia still reunite on Takonada but they’ve been together that entire time, just not in person. I think the whole thing on Starkiller Base where Stiles gets impaled by his kid still happens, BUT he doesn’t die BECAUSE Lydia won’t scream for him. She somehow manages to hold in that scream until they get him back to Rebel Base and operate on him, and therefor save him, thanks to her. Stiles DOES NOT DIE okay he deserves a lifetime of happiness with his bae

As for the rest of the series— obviously episode IX isn’t out yet so I can’t REALLY speak, but this is how I would have it go: Rey’s storyline in TLJ is MUCH more about her accepting her parentage and coming from nowhere than just furthering Kylo’s story. At some point when Snoke dies it’s like some sort of spell over Stydia’s kid SNAPS and he just sort of crumples. None of this “the supreme leader is dead let’s just kill EVERYONE and start fresh” nonsense. I think the last one would be about him denying the darkness that’s had him in its clutches for so long and coming back to the light side. Also, Scotty can’t die. Sorry, I don’t make the rules.

So basically: in the end, Stydia end up happy together after defeating the First Order with their kiddo back on the light side. The true happy ending they deserve.