#adhd got my ass
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I wanna draw more jaytims and other bats but I'm getting very busy, what a tragedy because I need then out of my system!! I don't even now what I wanna draw, just more of them!
#send prompts if you got them#im always so torn between sweet and tender or violent and angry or how to do both or maybe even sad and then i restart the loop#adhd got my ass
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building up the task of "make note card of notes for your speech" all day and i did it. it took me 2 minutes if that
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scheming bastard (2/11)
#noco family au#total drama#An Unwanted Replacement (OMG! Two Codies!!!)#total drama cody#dunno if ill finish this by halloween but hopefully by early november#I got my hands filled with this one#my adhd ridden ass leaving me to do these in like a day like what the fresh hell#i'll pull thru though
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"Wen Xiao had supplied a surprising range of documentation. Some of it was rather florid poetry with a lot of barely comprehensible metaphors. Some of it was anatomical illustrations. Some manuscripts purported to be accurate historical accounts, and several were straight-up pornography with no pretence to literary style."
a fanARTifact book based on this brilliant fic by @achray1
My first fanARTifact in a cdrama fandom and I'm in love with it. It came together far easier than most of my projects do. As always, see pics and read more below.
So, I have always seen these accordion style books in cdramas, usually covered in book cloth and often given to the Emperor, but it wasn't until I watching Strange Tales of Tang Dynasty, that I saw these gorgeous wooden ones and lost my actual mind. I swooned and immediately saved them in my For Future Reference Folder of Doom.
It's not a surprise that I have been absolutely OBSESSED with Fangs of Fortune for the last few weeks (sorry non cdrama friends) and reading achray's amazing story fueled me to finally give this a try. It wasn't until I was writing this post and re-reading the fic that I realized she said scrolls and I should have tried making a scrolllllllll, aiya. There's always next time.
My wonderful husband - always one to encourage my fannish behavior - kindly took time out of his day yesterday to cut, plane, sand, and round these covers out of a piece of walnut he had lying around. He made them bigger originally and I thought they should be trimmed down a bit. I admit he was right and I should have left them larger. Ah well, next time. As per usual with these projects, I did do the research to check if walnut trees are native, or at least grow in China, and thankfully they do so moving right along.
The ones in the picture above were clearly stained and likely shellac-ed, but I only oiled mine (again with walnut oil), and pressed them over night to soak up any extra. Just look at the difference after they'd been oiled holy hell!
I experimented with quite a few ideas for attaching the text: vinyl, carving it out (no. omg. no. Carving walnut is a nightmare. I know that now), gold foiling. But I finally landed on calligraphy on paper and then adhering it on the cover like the reference image.
I went back and forth and round and round trying to decide what the cover should say. My initial thought was to translate Achray's entire fic title but that ended up being way, way too much text. So after talking with a discord friend and a lot of thought, we landed on "妖性爱习俗", which *should* translate to "Demon Sex Practices/Customs" or "The Practice of Demonic Sex" which comes from this excerpt in the fic:
"She shook herself, and stood up, mentally running through a list of all the texts�� literary, historical, and medical— that she thought might or did describe demon sexual practices."
To do the text, I input the characters into a Chinese Calligraphy generator to use as reference. I don't own a brush capable of those gorgeous points, so I drew out the shapes and the followed the reference to fill them in. I did this a few times because I first made it way, waaaaay too big for the cover. I unfortunately decide to use a water based ink which, spoiler alert, will come back to bite me in the ass later.
See that bleeding. Yeah. That's my poor choice of a non waterproof ink, very thin calligraphy paper, and wheat paste asthe glue. Which I somehow didn't notice when I was doing the test on my extra board.
I decided to try out making wheat paste for the first time with this project and while I really did love the ability to remove and move around the piece you're gluing, it did not like to be stuck to the lightly oiled piece of wood so I decided after I redid the calligraphy on slightly thicker watercolor paper WITH waterproof ink, I would just stick with the tried and true PVA glue.
Lovely folks helped me decide between upper right hand corner or center placement and I'm really happy with the decision.
The inside is a torn down to size piece of an 22 x 30 Arches cold press 90lb watercolor paper, because with all my fanARTifact projects, especially the books, I like them to be usable objects in the end. I was SO fucking careful with my measuring and scoring and folding with this project y'all and I think I deserve a cookie.
I only used one piece folded up because I wanted the book to be able to remain flat/closed when it's not being used, but I think when I try this again, I will maybe try two pieces? Who knows. Certainly not me.
After all the stress of the calligraphy and the glue experiments gone wrong, it was finally assembled and put in my press with copious amounts of wax paper to protect everything.
In conclusion, this was a hell of a fun project and maybe the fastest I've ever seen a fanARTifact come together from start to finish. But I suppose one of the good things about learning all these new skills from each one of these projects will just make them come together easier (???) each time. I would love to get a nice calligraphy brush, some Xuan paper, and some ink and an inkstone to try a project like this again in the future.
I also want to try a scroll (which this should have been), stab binding, AND dragon scale binding. But, ya know, one step at a time yadda yadda.
Thank you, @achray1 for writing such wonderful, inspiring fics. And as always, if you made it to the end of my long ass posts, you deserve a cookie. 💛
#fanARTifact#fanARTifacts#fangs of fortune#大梦归离#fanbinding#bookbinding#the story of mystics#cdrama#highlynerdy makes#zhou yichen#zhao yuanzhou#li lun#handmade books#the zyc/zyz/ll ship has eaten my brain#though there are so many god tier ships in this show#and i say this was fast#but in reality is still looks probably 12 hours total to do from start to finish#it just seemed fast because my adhd ass was hyperfocused on it so hard the last two days#also! if i got the mandarin really wrong then please tell me!
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-The Seventh Dawn
#|| Screenshots#adhd getting me off my ass to do these before DT#I've got one more to finish today#|| Commissions#FFXIV#FF14#ffxiv hyur#hyur midlander#ffxiv gpose#final fantasy14#final fantasy xiv
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started stardew valley for the first time. born to remember villager likes and dislikes forced to immediately forget it the moment i take my eyes off thw wiki
#HELP. HEEEELPP <- THE FORGETTER#i have 18 different tabs open and im pretty sure half of them are duplicates. i have not made anything past 5000G i am so cooked#rn im at summer 11 ish?? i cant remember dates in real life either jesus christ GRIPPING THE COMMUNITY CALENDAR WITH MY BARE HANDS#my ass really went into this like “ill just take it easy and go into it blind so i get the newborn baby deer experience" completely ignoran#to the fact that i get anxious disappointing ppl and not having any background knowledge going into smth new. like a FOOL#also the walking speed is just slow enough to make me space out and forget where i was going and what i needed to do head in my hands#ive had to backtrack all over pelican town so many different times im in fucking adhd hell. resource management hell#im saying this like i hate it but its actually pretty fun and engaging when im not gripping my head trying to remember what i was doing#i got linus' 2 heart event and it made me whimper a little. LINUSSS LINUS I LIKE HIM. AND WILLY AND MARNIE THEYRE SO NICEYS#marnie kinda like.. reminds me of my friends mom even her face is pretty similar. shes sweet i like her. also willy calls me lad hes cool#i think im just gonna start a new save and NOT rely on the fucking mixed seed forages bc my ass was too stubborn to buy seeds#i just got sebastians 2 heart event too ughhh ive never had to work so hard for an emo boys approval. but it was satisfying#corn will fix me. its a replenishable summer-fall crop corn has to fucking fix me PLEASE#i also. made a stardew valley farmer. the one im playing as. their name is cosmo they have a backstory and everything im making#him a ref. his backstory is so fucking funny just wait#yapping#diary#puppy plays sdv
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got distracted again nsfw will have to wait a second
#andro talks#ADHD IS BEATING MY ASS AAAAAA#good news its alloid#its mermay but i just got an idea for a different beast
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when
whe you, when You were just trying to put i n some extra effort to try adn improve yoursel f and it got misinterpreted as malicious n u get yell ed at
#i'm slow as SHIT at carving the wax when making the dentures#equally bc of time blindness and being meticulous#i am VERY aware of how slow i am and have been working my ass off to try and improve#so when i got told AGAIN that i needed to pick things up#i asked my sis who is also a lab tech how she carves her wax#so she vid called me on lunch to show me how she does it#SO TO TRY AND SHOW MY TRAINER THAT I WAS TRYING TO IMPROVE#i go#oh! my sister suggests i do this and that to improve!#and she gets SUPER MAD AT ME#she GROWLS#LISTEN#you can't keep calling your sister for every little thing#(i'd only done this one other time)#I'M your trainer NOT her#you need to STOP being so damn meticulous and just Pay Attention#and i've tried being patient with you but you need to pick it up#and i was just like#*see above image*#she did apologize later but i think she thought i was like....#trying to undermine her somehow??#by seeking outside help??#bc i'm neurodivergent and asking someone who knows how my brain works??#i know she was just having a bad day probably but having adhd means#Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria#and so i went home like#aheem aheem whimper#nat chats#moi loif#neurodivergent
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gonna be so sad when tonight is the first preshow space with good audio and i'm asleep because i have a psych appointment tomorrow
#life update if anyone gaf we're now at the point where i know i'm getting the adhd diagnosis and yet i STILL HAVE TO WAIT#like she just isnt sure if it's adhd or add (its norway theyre not gonna update the terms any time soon just roll with it)#and im just like. girl i don't give a fuck#its been so many years i cant do this anymore#we've talked to my fucking kindergarten teachers like 😭 they've investigated my entire life atp#to make sure i did in fact have all these issues from birth#because my word and my mum's word just isn't good enough i guess#like lets rely on the selective memories of random ass people ive encountered growing up this is ASININE#anyway my godmother had a 4h consultation the other day and got diagnosed on the spot#so now my mum is mad at her LMFAO#cause my mum's like. that bitch doesn't even have adhd. shes fine.#which i feel like is probably wrong but i agree with the sentiment#where is the deep dive investigation into her wholeass existence 😭#its cause she got to go private but they refuse to refer me to a private specialist so i have to keep going publuc#public#and if i go private on my own its too expensive plus the waitlist is years long#so. whatever. i guess.#man im so tired.#i will never ever ever forgive my psychiatrist from when i was 15 who said i probably had adhd but because i did ok in school its fine#and they wouldnt set the diagnosis#because the fact that i have papers from when i was 15 saying i don't have it is what's making this all so difficult#even though if you read all the papers it says i hit on EVERY SINGLE POINT#which is why the One Psych who listened to me is absolutely fuming losing her mind cause she can't understand why any of this happened#man i hate my fucking life lol
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As a person with ADHD who forgets to drink water a lot n' such: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE BIRD BREAKS IN THE TURBO VIDEO!!!!!!!!!! I LOVED EM SO MUCH!!!! thank you for the bird breaks <3
Ur welcome :) I’m glad they served their purpose ❤️
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[11052023] Bot Practice: V1
I really wanna get into drawing robots so I can draw my characters but lack experience. Decided the best way to go about it is to draw fanart of existing bots so I can learn like, what everyone else does. Lol
First bot to my mind was V1. I've drawn him before but never really drew with the intention of learning. Went ahead and took the first image I found and heavily ref'd it as I lazily sketched, allowing myself to make mistakes because hey, here to learn, not stress over perfect details.
_ Art // myself, @kqltlc V1 // ULTRAKILL (New Blood Interactive) Don't use in anyway whatsoever, thnx
#kqltlc#my art#digital art#digitalart#krita#krita art#krita drawing#fanart#ultrakill fanart#ultrakill#v1#v1 ultrakill#ultrakill v1#I know v1 doesnt have a gender but I default to he/him pronouns bc Im gae as fuck and read it as male#prob doesnt help the image I refd reads more as male than feral gremlin twig with a gun snrk#on that note I need to get my undiagnosed adhd ass to catch up#I only got as far as the end of act 1 despite loving the game and story so so much LMAO#...I say as I also wanna draw more bots#and my friends are trying to get me to play minecraft with them#I wanna do alllll the thiinnngggssss
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When you start writing a post about your new Spidersona and it somehow becomes an essay on psychedelic indigenous plant medicine, the spirits they contain and the basics of Andean spiritual ceremony-
Y'all I sincerely apologize
#I'm genuinely not joking that's what happened#I CAN'T TAKE THIS ADHD SHIT ANYMORE!!!!!!#I'M SO EXHAUSTED AND I DIDN'T DO WHAT I MEANT TO DO WHICH WAS GETTING TO ASK#in sorry I did nothing today the ADHD got my ass#:(#it's a nice post though but fuck my executive disfunction is killing me#actually adhd#adhd
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Dragon Noodle Soup :3
#world of warcraft#dragonflight#dragons#I both adore the kalimdor racing event and also am highly frustrated cuz advanced gold is always 1-3 seconds off#most fun ive ever had in WoW#also worst time ever#maybe second to the mage tower cuz that shit was NOT MADE for my ADHD ass#im joking the worst times in this game is trying to convince strangers to let you join endgame content#and then get bullied by them#i dont do dungeons anymore#seriously tho the dragon racing is some of the most fun and engaging wow content ever give me moreeeee#I need more single player content that feels like this#that is highly rewarding and i dont need to suck up to assholes to achieve#((desperatly begging for a solo story version of dungeons and raids so i can experience the story without getting abused by other players))#i DID THE MONK DMG MAGE TOWER IN LEGION. I HAVE TRIED THE NEW VER 100 FUCKING TIMES#AND ITS HARDER THIS TIME SO I FUCKING CAN'T#ASLDKHADOIHADIA#I have to be on top of every fucking thing for like 12 minutes straight due to my dmg output and following guides dont help me#I got him down to 20-30 percent and then ditched the game to play FFXIV for a full ass year#this was jan 2022#I havn't attempted since i probably should.#sorry forgot what this post was about
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Fuck all of y'all in Florida how dare you misrepresent my liberal king that man loves women (not in that way) and he would not STAND for this smh
#yk damn well he'd make the vague but absolutely not vague threats and then actually follow through on them#HE WOULD NOT MISS!!!!!!!#anyways this week has sucked so bad dear god#the cold I've had for a month has apparently been pneumonia#And I coughed so hard I TORE A FUCKING MUSCLE in my ribs and I could barely move for days and had to sleep in a recliner#also finally got diagnosed with adhd but found out all my old teachers told my mom they think I have it and I should get tested but NOOOOOOO#SHE DIDN'T WANT TO DEAL WITH IT#there literally couldn't have been a clearer sign than when I almost failed fourth grade because I couldn't turn in my homework on time#The election obviously my immediate family are full Kamala but my grandparents are VERY Trump#Oh and my brothers therapist told us he apparently has the most severe case of executive dysfunction he's seen in his 30 years of working#He literally told us to just take him out of college and let him live at home forever because he won't be able to finish school#because of it so THAT'S gonna be fun since my dad said if he ever tries to come live back here he'll throw him out on the streets#THIS IS JUST IN A WEEK#WHO IS MY OPP I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID BUT I DON'T DESERVE THIS FANFIC WRITER ASS LORE#LEAVE ME ALONE 😭#red vs blue#rvb#rooster teeth#rvb florida#election 2024
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Y'all can laugh at this real world shit.
#Not snz but...#I just got an email from a client#And it took me 20 minutes to figure out what she was trying to tell me#It said “I ate and no one said shit.”#I'm a life coach/counselor that specializes in helping other neurodivergents#I'm going over my notes like “did she mention an eating disorder?”#Did my ADHD ass really miss something big???#So I send her a response asking for clarification because I don't want her to think I'm ignoring her#I tell her that if she wants to discuss her eating situation we can do that#She is MASSIVELY confused#I am MASSIVELY confused#And then?#She explains that she meant she kicked ass and no one said anything#Y'all...#Gen X and Elder Millennials need help with this shit LMFAO#I'm not good with uncommon meanings of common words#Or short forms of common words#Or skibidi sigma whatever lol#For the love of all the gods...DO NOT make me invoke Pauly Shore#Don't tax my gig so hardcore dudes#Or you'll know that I'm just trying to chill in my pad with some sweet grindage#Why do you think Grimm talks the way he does??#BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ELSE LMFAO#This has been a gnarly PSA#Oh and for additional LOLS#When you “ate it” during my time?#It means you fell down or failed lol#I'll just got back to writing courtly bullshit now lol
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aeoy enjoyers ya’ll are in for one hell of a meal
#seems like the longer it takes me to update the better the chapter is lol#the big noremma moment in this ch downloaded into my brain a few days ago and hit me like a truck and WAH I want to draw it#but i want to writeeee#adhd is beating my ass I’m sorry ya��ll#also I’m not saying i got distracted by rayvio again. but i got distracted by rayvio.#The Flirting Game is one of my greatest inventions lmao that dynamic provides me endless entertainment
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