#ada deserves to get a little silly

[mochiiniko]

burning up in your mad iq

[aeonsnumber1fan]

love the idea of ada just being a girl about her feelings for leon. like its cool when shes closed off and badass and like pretends she doesnt like him as much as she does but consider this like post re4 she gets home and goes to write in her diary about that blonde twink using a sparkly pink gel pen and pretending everything is good and okay i need people to become more open to the concept of ada actually showing that she reciprocates leons feelings instead of their dynamic being boiled down to him loving her and her like basically js toleratinf his existence! because she loves him!!!! she really does!!!!!!! shes just a girl let her be silly i dont care if it doesnt fit the way shes portrayed in canon she deserves to be a little crazy with a crush also im a big fan of ada using art to cope with The Horrors so i think she doodles him and maybe draws hearts around him shes really just a grown teenage girl u have to understand

[wizardfrog69]

Hi hi! can i request for bsd men x reader who is a doctor and have the ability like machi from hxh?

Thank you for the request!

'•.¸♡ doctor ♡¸.•'

Doctor reader

Fluff

Masterlist

Enjoy!

Feat. Fukuzawa, Atsushi, Kunikida, Dazai, Katai, Mori, Ace, Rimbaud, Akutagawa, Hirotsu, Kajii, Oda, Ango, Fitzgerald, Nathaniel, Fyodor

Yukichi Fukuzawa:

He finds your ability very useful and will employ you if you already aren't an employee.

He will be as careful as always, not putting himself in harm's way, but if he does get a limb chopped off by accident he will come straight to you.

Your thread is useful for combat and traps, which is something he takes into consideration when planning out his schemes.

You and Yosano often work together.

If you don't want to leave your job, he will understand and not force you out of your work.

Atsushi Nakajima:

This man's limbs grow back like nothing happened, so your ability is useless/j

If he gets hurt during a mission, he would go straight to you to take care of him.

He's way too shy to admit it, but he really likes it when you take care of him as no one ever did, and he was forced to look after himself, it's nice to have a break from worrying about yourself.

Make him a ball of thread to play with (like a cat), and he'll be very happy and entertained for some time.

Doppo Kunikida:

He also thinks your ability is quite useful, and despite how much he does not want you involved in any missions, your threads can be useful.

If you do not work in the ada, Kunikida would often visit you after work, if you aren't busy.

He doesn't really want to visit you when he's injured so as not to worry you and cause you additional work.

If you do end up taking care of him, he will be very pleased and find comfort in your soothing touch.

Osamu Dazai:

He takes your ability to his advantage.

He may become a bit more careless (as if he isn't already) and put himself in harms way more, just to see your worried face and for you to care for him. At least that's what he claims.

He does always love it when you care for him, even if it's putting a plaster on a scratch on his face, which he obtained by "falling."

Katai tayama:

Since he never leaves his house, you can tend to him whenever you need to.

Katai doesn't get injured a lot, so you don't have to worry about him.

Ogai Mori:

Mori, being a doctor himself, obviously does not need any help regarding himself, but it would be useful to have another medic in the mafia.

Your ability can also be useful in combat, so Mori wastes no time trying to convince you to join the mafia. You probably don't have a choice since he's the leader, and it would be quite difficult to be with the leader of a mafia without being a part of it.

A new torture method is now being used in the mafia, cutting somebody's limbs off :)

Ace:

This little prick would put one of his collars around your neck, and you would be his personal doctor, tending to all of his wounds and stuff.

Don't worry, he won't exchange you for gems. You are just too valuable for that.

Arthur Rimbaud:

Maybe you could finally figure out why he's so cold all the time.

If you two are together, you probably work in the mafia, or the other place he's from.

He admires the work you do, human life (or any life really) is important, and you should receive the respect and loyalty it deserves.

Ryūnosuke Akutagawa:

He could care less about your occupation unless it benefits him, and in this case, it does.

You would often help him with his wounds and coughing, reminding him to eat and drink, etc.

Your threads are quite useful to him, and he could strategize your ability into something.

Ryūrō Hirotsu:

What a silly old man.

You could be his personal nurse instead of sending him to a nursing home.

Motojiro Kajii:

Tbh, I'm surprised he isn't dead, ik he doesn't get hurt by his bombs but like still

He would always come home with some sort of scratches, which you will place a little lemon themed plaster on.

Also, you call him a mad scientist, and it was probably his idea.

Sakunosuke Oda:

Finally, someone norm- oh wait, he's a skeleton. Ig you'll have to help him not be dead.

You would always have plasters on you with an animal print or something on them, usually for the kids Oda takes care of, but it wouldn't hurt to help someone else out who needs one.

Oda loves what you do and wishes to help you when you come home tired from a long day at the hospital.

The kids Oda takes care of do get sick from time to time, so you will end up getting them to feel better.

Hey, maybe you could stich the kids back together after the little explosion? Pretty please????

Ango Sakaguchi:

He's too tired to realise his arms have fallen off.

He would get sick from the sleepless nights, and you'd demand him to stay home, but he would go to work anyway.

Ango respects your profession greatly and would never dream of getting in the way of your work.

He understands all too well how work can deprive you of everything, so he doesn't really ask you of anything.

Francis Scott Fitzgerald:

You are working in his team of Americans (ew)

/j I just don't think the food in America should be eaten.

Anyways.

You will be the doctor of the group, taking care of anyone who is ill.

He will find your ability useful and will certainly take it to his advantage, money is after all (one of) the most important things in this world and Fitzgerald will get it any means necessary, unless that means hurting you (or himself).

He cares about his family, so he doesn't wish for you to die :)

Nathaniel Hawthrone:

I'm surprised he isn't blaming the devil for everything tbh.

He can use this blood as thread so you can go away now. Your ability is not useful/j

Its great that you want to save people! (Or the children of God, I forgot how religious he is).

He can help by praying for you and your patients. that's it. God is the best doctor, after all.

He doesn't typically cut off his limbs whilst in battle, but if he does, he knows you will always be there to help him if he needs it.

Fyodor Dostoevsky:

Your ability is useful to Fyodor and his gang of rats. You can stich limbs back on, and the nervous system will reattach itself like nothing happened, brilliant!

Fyodor claims he doesn't need a doctor or to be taken care of. In truth, he does, but he fails to admit it, fearing he may appear weak or dependent on other people. His feelings don't stop him from making you the doctor of a bunch of rats.

You may not be a vet, but it doesn't hurt to try!

༺♡༻ 𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 ⋆ 𖡼.𖤣𖥧𖡼.𖤣𖥧 𓍊𓋼𓍊𓋼𓍊 ༺♡༻

I'm sorry I couldn't include everyone. It would have taken too long, and u would just be repeating myself, even though I'm already doing so here.

Happy pride month, everyone! So many people have come so far to allow us to be ourselves. It may still be difficult, but that is why we need to celebrate everyone!

I was recently binge watching some shows, so I added some more to the fandoms I write for if anyone is interested. To find the list, go to the masterlist -> the bottom of the post -> press 'Fandoms I write for, rules & regulations♡'

Have a wonderful day/night and enjoy pride month!

-love, Az

[m1xieup]

spoliers for Nevermore episode 80!!!!!! (Read at your own risk)

Ok so first of all…. So much happened. I for one am filled with immeasurable joy due to this episode (though I am still awaiting Duke to come back from the wall). We got some character development, Lenore standing up for herself/her friends and refusing to be a pawn in this game, we got some actual Will content outside of Montresor, and possibly some new characters! All of this is incredibly exciting to me! Now I must warn you that I am a Will enjoyer and this post is mainly about my thoughts/theories about him, though I will say the development for everyone was great and I’m so excited to see how they evolve. I will tell you that even though I predicted they may go to Will, I still didn’t think it would happen-he is a side character after all, no matter how much I enjoy him. It was so nice to see him just being his silly self outside of Montrashsor. He seems like a sweet kid caught up in the wrong crowd. However my main reason for posting this is to discuss where he may go in the future.

this conflict is going to change the dynamic of both groups immensely. Lenore’s group may be more cautious and reserved, but I think Annabel’s may fracture. Prospero is loyal to her, but Ada her other devotee is now dating Monty, and may be more loyal to him. Morella won’t want to stay with Annabels group when she learns what they did to Duke, so she’ll probably leave. Monty may start shit with Annabel and may make a power play especially if he passes this off as her plan, and claims he could do better (this is assuming Duke is rescued which I sincerely hope he is). Ada would most likely support him, so Annabel needs to be really careful with how she does things going forward.

Ok so what about Will? He doesn’t really have a choice as far as he’s concerned Lenore could and would murder him so he has to help her. This puts him in a difficult place, as he technically would have betrayed his team by helping to free Duke. So I have a couple ideas about how his arc (which I think he’ll get one! Which makes me very happy ) could go

He stays with Annabel’s group and possibly faces punishment or harm for betraying them (you can’t tell me Monty would not be incredibly pissed at him, and he is not above hurting people that care for him)

he joins Lenore’s group (this is a little unlikely as Idk if they would accept him in after what he did to Duke even if Eulalie and Berenice seem to have some sympathy for him, however it would be very fun and in my opinion Will deserves better friends so it would make me happy)

he goes on his own (idk if he could make it on his own but it’s a possibility)

he dies/gets killed/is eliminated (this sort of goes with the previous but I also wouldn’t put Monty above murdering him if he felt Will betrayed him) [this would make me sad and I hope it doesn’t happen, near death is fine though I can handle angst]

He could join up with another group all together (this is somewhat based on my theory that the 3 guys we saw in the background are going to be somewhat important going forward) basically my theory is that he could join up with three guys we see as a 3rd party or in conjunction with one of the others. ((I also just think it’d be both hilarious and in character for Will to find someone else to latch onto and lackey for))

all in all a fantastic update! I’m so excited to learn more about/get a Will character arc, and I’m excited to see how he grows (change for the better, I believe in you!) I’m sooooo interested to see how these new faces interact with the others and to learn more about them as well. I am eating up Lenore’s arc, and I am so excited to see how this shift in dynamic with Annabel changes things! These are my general thoughts and opinions/theories! I’d love to hear yours fellow fast-passers (or those that read this when it come out fully)! Thank you for sticking with my insane ramblings (I’m so normal about Nevermore I swear) and have a wonderful day/night!

[play-rough]

I’m so happy you liked my Ranpo and Atsushi tangent— partially because I was doing an all nighter when I sent that in and started to question its coherence afterwards 🥲

I’m in two minds about The Pacifier Incident, because on one hand I imagine it being a silly little story the ADA laugh about in the future, talking about it like it’s a dreaded canon event- a ‘we don’t talk about Bruno’, if you will, and I desperately want it to be cute and lighthearted. But I have the feeling that it would in reality be an incredibly angsty moment that showed the true extent of how traumatised he really was, regarding his headspace. All I know for certain, is that the whole thing managed to happen in the 3 minutes Kunikida had left the room.

The other important part I’ve agonised over is dependant on whether or not Ranpo actually had mackerel’s paci to begin with. If he did, I see him marching over and pressing it into his mouth before Dazai has a moment to process. He kinda sits there in utter surprise for a good moment before he catches up and tries to remove it, which naturally devolves into a lot of bickering, whining and a VERY lame struggle between them.

If he doesn’t have it, Ranpo just comes up to his desk and starts rifling through in search of one. I imagine Dazai is still relatively new to the ADA and Ranpo’s demeanour doesn’t change much when he’s small so it’s not always clear at first glance to people that don’t know him all that well. Dazai’s caught off guard by the sudden invasion of his space and the affectionate but condescending remarks he receives about being ‘just a baby’ and how ‘he needs his paci -right now-’. This would probably be the more angsty option of the two, I think that Dazai would spend his ‘cool down’ time in the break room crying in frustration rather than pouting and raving about the disrespect. In both versions though Ranpo gets put in timeout (as the sweet but disrespectful little shi deserves 🤬) and Kunikida gives him a very firm talking to- mostly to explain that he’s not in trouble for looking after his brother, but for the way he disregarded what Dazai wanted and overwhelming him. Almost nothing is learned though 🧍and The Pacifier Incident will always be famous to the ADA.

I swear I tried not to write an essay this time 😔 hope you at least liked this add on 🥲

Is it ok if I claim an emoji sign off for any future headcanons? I’d quite like to be 🍓 or 🐝 if either are available?

I hope you are okay with being 🍓 anon because i just promised the bee to someone else 😭

I am always a fan of angst and I feel like it’s more realistic that Dazai would not have his paci nearby, and finding absolutely no little items in his desk would probably fuel Ranpo’s mission (I imagine Yosano keeps extra pacifiers in her office so he could always get one from there, but i think it’s more impactful for Ranpo to expect to find a paci in Dazai’s desk and then be upset when he doesn’t) and honestly I can see a lame struggle happening no matter what 😂 Ranpo can try to pull Dazai into the playpen instead, easy scenario for someone to fall over and start crying.

I also really like the angst of Dazai and Ranpo’s different views on headspace, Ranpo obviously doesn’t see being little as a bad thing and his way of referring to Dazai as a baby of course is intended to be all love, but Dazai just feels frustrated and embarrassed 🥺 it’s the kind of misunderstanding and feelings angst that I live for lol

[pink-strawberry-kissess]

ada and leon where so baby face in re2r and knowing that they still see each other like that 😭

like no matter how old leon gets ada will always see him as that rookie cop with a cute lil face

and no matter how old ada gets leon will always see her as that hot mercenary that wasn’t able to kill him

THEY ARE SO BABY FACE IN RE2r I CAN'T STAND IT SJBFSJKFS

honestly this, yes. over the years, they both see how they've aged and how the years have affected them. but they both see each other as how they are also. i think that's also why i find leon's affection for ada so admirable because he is willing to take her as she is. it's so fucking trite to be like "he deserves a good girl," that's NOT WHAT HE WANTS.

ada will always see him as that innocent boyish pile of sunshine that wants to do the right thing and save everyone and have the strength to do it. but also that he's a silly little bean

and leon will always see her as a strong woman with conviction. i still think that ada was always seen in his eyes as "better than him," not always in terms of morally, but in the way that she's stronger in some senses. he always had the inner drive to save people- that's why he wanted to be a cop. but he's always seen ada as an equal, that he doesn't "need" to protect her (even though he would want to)

anyways they are so cute bye

[sweetcollywobbles]

SO SORRY I HAVENT REPLIED TO YOUR HEADCANNONS I HAD EXAMS THAT I HAD TO STUDY AND LOSE SLEEP OVER SO SORRY😭😭

ANYWAYS MY TAKE ON LEON IS THAT I CAN FUCKING TELL THAT HE NORMALISED KIDNAPPING TAKING WHAT'S HIS

AND BEING LIKE I GAVE MY LIFE AND RISKED EVERYTHING FOR MY JOB FOR THE PUBLIC FOR PEOPLE LIKE YOU I DESERVE THIS

like bae that- It don't work like that lmao

BTW I LOVE UR HEADCANNONS BOTH SFW N NSFW

BUT FOR NSFW I FEEL LIKE LEON WOULD BE THE TYPE TO PIN YOU TO THE BED BY WRAPPING HIS LARGE VEINY HOT HANDS AND CHOKE YOU LIGHTLY SQUEEZING AND WHEN YOURE ABOUT TO ORGASM HE SQUEEZES TIGHTER AND SAYS

C'mon baby beg for it yeah?beg for me pretty girl

Fuck my pretty girl squeezing me so good so good f'me yeah?

WENT A BIT ON THE NSFW SORRY HE MAKES ME FEEL THINGSSS

AND THE WAY YOU PHRASED HIM KIDNAPPING READER AS "PLAYING HOUSE" LIKE A DOMESTICATED GAME THAT WILL LAST FOR 5 MINUTES NOT FOREVER AHHH STOP

AND YKNOW WHATS SO WEIRD I HAVE THE COLOGNE SAUVAGE BY DIOR

I DONT HAVE IT BUT MY BROTHERS DO IM NOT TRYNA SHOW OFF IT JUST GOT ME SO EXCITED WHEN U SED THAT SORRY IF I SOUND SPOILED😭😭😭

EVERYONE CAN STFU HE SLEEP ON THE SIDE OF THE BED WHERE ITS CLOSER TO THE DOOR INCASE ANYTHING EVER HAPPENS😭😭❤️❤️❤️

LOVE UR WORK BTW ITS AMAZING AND AHHH I COULD DO A LITERAL CRITCAL ANALYSIS ON IT

-❤️ANON

❤️ anon, my beloved! i hope your exams went well and now you're getting enough sleep!! again, thank you so much for the love and support!

i hope the headcanons weren't too wordy or detailed i kinda got carried away when writing them lmao 💀 they were soooo self indulgent especially the nsfw.

also, you're right. i wanted to show how leon is just too tired of being alone and always being used by the government that he literally has nothing for himself. he's been used by ada one too many times and maybe some other girls that never seem to stay because of his job. but, you're here. and you've fed into his delusions that there is a future for him.

i was soooo kicking my feet when i wrote "playing house" because i was 100% thinking about being controlled by him like a little doll <3

also i don't think you're showing off at all!! i don't own the cologne, but i have smelled it before and i thought it was the best-smelling cologne out there.

i really do appreciate your view on the works that i have put out so far! it encourages me to write the little scenarios that enter my silly little brain lol

xx

[hagatha-christie]

Things I read in April, blah blah who cares

The bad:

Hang the Moon by Alexandria Bellefleur - I might need a lobotomy or something because I remember liking her first book just fine but I found all the characters here so aggressively unlikable and dumb that I surely could not have liked the first book in this series. The couple in question in this book get engaged at Disneyland at the end which I feel like tells you everything you need to know about this.

The Bees by Carol Ann Duffy - maybe not “bad” but extremely dated.  It was published in 2011, so like, sure, but this felt extremely first wave feminism in a bad way? There were a couple poems in here I liked but overall not for me.

The fine:

Something Wild and Wonderful by Anita Kelly - got the job done. I might be biased because the outdoorsy setting worked for me personally. But my God is there some contract that romance authors sign requiring them to include at least one soul-crushingly embarrassing moment per book? One of the main characters sings “Wonderwall” to the other and I did want to die, not in a good way.

The Hurting Kind by Ada Limon - sad because I looooooved Bright Dead Things, but also I was in the throes of a particularly exhausting week when I read this so maybe that was user error on my part.

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke - my internal monologue throughout didn’t go beyond “huh. neat!” So that’s my official review.

The good/great:

Harrow the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir - extremely confusing and silly in a fun way but also the way Muir did the narration was incredibly interesting, and also each character has such a distinct voice that it makes you interested in continuing to read even though half the time you literally do not know what is happening.

Death of a Naturalist by Seamus Heaney - made me want to walk around in some fields full of mud with a walking stick

Field Notes by Seamus Heaney - very sad and very complex but excellent, I liked it more than Death of a Naturalist, I think.

Foster by Claire Keegan - my book journal says “this book and Seamus Heaney IN THE SAME MONTH????” A quiet, tiny little novel that was beautiful in every way. I loved it.

Pew by Catherine Lacey - Listen, I still am thinking my silly little thoughts about this book, it absolutely floored me. Unsettling the entire time with zero closure. Absolutely superb.

The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin - my first Baldwin (I know, I know!) and the way he writes and expresses his anger is just...breathtaking. Like it’s so nuanced and precise and I just kept reading thinking “how?????”

Selected Poems by Gwendolyn Brooks - I am still losing my shit over “The Anniad”. Gwendolyn Brooks forever.

Maud Martha by Gwendolyn Brooks - I have thought about Maud Martha constantly since reading this and I hope she’s having a fantastic day because she deserves it.

[youmissedone]

Ada studied Carlos intently during his moment of silence. He probably didn’t believe her, and he had good reason not to. Although her attraction to him was strong, Ada still had missions whose completion would be more important than a silly fantasy about a man. She couldn’t avoid feeling attracted by Carlos’s kindness, and in some way, he brought out the best in her, but she felt that she’d betrayed his trust too severely for this to ever become something more. Besides, Carlos deserved better than someone like her. Maybe sometimes Ada had an ulterior motive, but not at this moment.

“You don’t need to apologize, but I do want to talk about it,” she admitted quietly. Ada had wrapped her arms around herself, and although it was lightly drizzling, she seemed to be both cold and uneasy. “Sometimes it’s really nice to have someone who understands.” With that, she smiled.

Ada worked for others, yet she was loyal to no one but herself. Wesker was the one who had sent her on this mission, but Carlos hadn’t figured that out yet, though she was almost certain he’d figure it out eventually. They were both people of color with excellent combat skills, mysterious backgrounds, and an incredible ability to adapt. Carlos was a good listener, and those similarities made it easier for Ada to open up to him.

“The story I told you before about my family is mostly false. You picked up on most of the fallacies - you were less naïve than I initially expected. My family was not very wealthy, but we never were involved in any uprisings like I said earlier, and we went to America when I was three. My parents wanted a better life for me. The American Dream, as they say. We had lost some of our money, and given we had little to begin with… I’m sure you understand. But we were never cheated out of a mass fortune. My father was killed when I was fifteen, and my mother and I never got along very well. I ran away. I learned to put on a cold mask, but it turned out my specific skill set was very useful to my organization. I didn’t go to school, though at one point I wanted to be an investigative journalist. Those skills got me hired. I did missions here and overseas. My organization trained me, and when I was twenty, I eventually infiltrated an organization here - they became one of the leading organizations of the Chinese underworld. The FBI crushed it, and I distanced myself from them. That’s when one of my employers found me, the one who sent me on the mission in Raccoon. I still work for the other organization, but I also work for him - I work for myself, mostly, but I’ll take what work I can get. Most of my missions come from the other organization.”

It was easy for Ada to lie to Carlos earlier, and it was easier to get him to believe her. Her story might’ve recalled his own personally experience as an immigrant, and his protective nature was clear to her from the moment they met. Ada’s past was filled with hardship, yes, but her story wasn’t as dark she’d initially led him to believe. Still, she wasn’t sure how much he trusted her after everything that went down in Raccoon.

“And then… I met you. One of my employers, he doesn’t work for the main company I work for, the one that trained me, but he pointed it out to me that there could be something more sinister about them. They’re no Umbrella, trust me, but they’re not as well-intentioned as I thought when I was younger. I was never loyal to them anyway, but spying is the only thing I really know how to do. I… I thought about contacting you, you know. You didn’t let me push you away, but I thought ‘Ada Wong’ needed to die. Turns out she’s the most alive she’s ever been.”

Ada laughed a little, but it was toneless and cold. She avoided making eye contact with Carlos. This was the most vulnerable she’d ever been with anybody, and although she typically didn’t like it, she wanted to be open with him for some reason. Her red sweater did little to keep her warm, but the long sleeves were nice, and she seemed to retreat into herself a little. Ada took a shaky breath. Her eyes were glassy with tears.

“Umbrella screwed over my family. My mother was a scientist, and my cousin wanted to follow in her footsteps. They were tortured and killed when they tried to look into Umbrella’s practices. It shouldn’t have surprised me, but that’s why I need to take them down. For my family, and for all the people like them out there. People like you, sort of. Is that - why did you join Umbrella?”

Ada leaned her head against Carlos’ shoulder. This was difficult for her to talk about, and having his physical support put her at ease. Her breathing was getting shallower and more panicked by the second.

“I told you this for a reason, though, Carlos. Deluge - the corporation that trained me - I think they might be allied with Umbrella to some degree. I know they’re lying to me about their involvement with what happened to my family. The timing of it happened too close to when they recruited me for it to be coincidental. They don’t trust me, though. They know I’m a threat. That’s where you come in… we need to get married.”

Ada’s heart raced as she suggested it. It was only a formality. A slip of paper to show the higher-ups at Deluge. Why, then, did she almost wish this could be real? Why, then, did she want to hold Carlos close and never let go?

“They know I’m a danger to them. I’m a good enough liar that I can sell the ingénue arc, but not on my own. There’d have to be a catalyst. If they thought I was so in love that I was blind, things might slip. I need to take them down almost as much as I need to take Umbrella down. Please, Carlos? I can’t do this without you.”

__________

“You bet,” Carlos said gently and with a little nod, willing to listen for as long as she needed. “Everyone needs a sympathetic ear once in a while. I don’t mind being that for you, Ada.” Her little smile made him smile briefly as well, before he gave her his undivided attention as she told him more about herself, and her reasons for being so hellbent on taking the Umbrella Corporation down.

He let her get everything out, not wanting to interrupt the process or make her feel like he wasn’t listening. What she needed was someone to just be there for her, not to give their opinion or offer advice. Sometimes just listening quietly did wonders for someone. It had for Carlos as well over the years, and it seemed to him like Ada hadn’t been offered that sort of empathy from anyone in a long time. It all began to make a lot of sense to him, the more she explained. The inconsistencies and things that didn’t quite sit well with him during her first explanation of her past now felt more real, more genuine.

And her demeanor, the way she carried herself, the way she spoke... that made more sense now as well. She felt the need to guard herself and to maintain a cold exterior. That kept her safe in a number of ways, not all of which were physical. If one pretended to not care about anyone else, it’s easy to lie to oneself. It’s easy to remain closed off so you don’t get hurt. Carlos understood that type of mindset, for he’d encountered it in any number of people in his town and even his own family back in Brazil. He absolutely understood that survival mechanism some people developed to emotionally cope with the trajectory their lives had taken, even if that wasn’t how he lived his own life. Even with all the trauma that had been heaped on him over the years, Carlos still lived his life with a heart wide open. Did he get hurt sometimes? Sure. Was that gonna make him afraid to feel in the future? Hell no. He was sad for Ada that she saw emotions as liabilities in her life, but boy did he understand why.

What worried him, was that in all the masking and guarding of her identity that Ada had been doing, whether for a mission or just to protect herself emotionally, seemed to have muddled her view of her own identity. Who was Ada Wong, really? Her true self, or just a persona she’d conjured up to serve a purpose? Carlos didn’t care about names or even affiliations. Those could change, could be altered, and could come and go over the years. He could see the person she was underneath everything else, from just the small glimpses here and there that she showed him. He only hoped that she could somehow find a way to be at peace with whoever she truly wanted to be.

Only when prompted did Carlos speak up, answering her question regarding his reasons for joining Umbrella’s ranks. “When I left Brazil, I was largely self-trained, or trained by other members of my family, like my uncle. Having lost most of my family by the time I was a teenager, I decided to leave and go where I was needed. I’ve always wanted to help people, so I became a mercenary. I figured... let people hire me to get things done they can’t do themselves, and maybe I can make a difference somewhere. But my skills were rough at best, and my discipline was even worse, and I was flat broke half the time. So... after I worked my way through Mexico and arrived in the United States, I started looking into the military there. Surprise surprise, it’s not that easy for a South American immigrant with a history like mine to join the military in the States,” he said with a chuckle as he idly rubbed the back of his neck.

“That’s when a friend I was staying with at the time told me Umbrella was hiring. At first I didn’t really understand, because what does a pharmaceutical company need with paramilitary? But on the surface they seemed to care about medical science and improving the lives of the general public, and that was something I could get behind. They were willing to pay for room, board, equipment, and training for me, there were advancement options, the way they framed the work sounded like I’d be mostly helping people... it sounded good. But I was young and stupid and I should’ve known something was up when they had me sign a lengthy nondisclosure agreement...”

There was a bitterness directed at Umbrella but also himself in his tone. How could he have been this naive? How could he not have seen the signs? “I thought I’d be protecting people, and instead I ended up being employed by the company that was part of the problem, not the solution. I made a mistake. It’s not gonna happen again, and Umbrella isn’t going to get away with any of this. I’m going to help take them down, or die trying,” he said firmly.

When she leaned her head against his shoulder, Carlos slipped an arm around her shoulders. Not to try anything, he wasn’t making a move on her or anything, that would’ve been an insensitive thing to do at a moment like this. No, he just recognized by her body language how she was folding in on herself and was feeling protective towards her. He just wanted to help stabilize her a little, if he could. “It’s okay,” he whispered, prompting her to continue and letting her know he was still willing to listen, if there was more.

And oh man... was there ever more. “I- Wait, what?” Carlos asked, blindsided by her suggestion. “Get married?” He knew she was into him, but he didn’t think that much, and so he fell silent once again as she explained further. It... actually made a decent amount of sense. “You really think something like that would make them slip up that much? Enough so you can get the upper hand on them?” He didn’t know this other organization, but he wondered if such a tactic would really work on Umbrella...

But he could hear in her voice how important this was to her, and he wanted to take Umbrella down as well, so... “Okay. Yeah. Sure. Why not?” he said with a shrug. “I’ll do it. And then we can take both these entities down... together. We trust each other, we work together, and we make sure they can’t hurt anyone else when we’re through with ‘em. Deal?” he offered.

[patchesproblem]

Thoughts on each Anti-Entropy member?

It depends on what you mean by thoughts, like if it's just my general opinion or if you're meaning the ideas I have for each one. If this isn't what you meant feel free to send another ask.

Tesla, Einstein, and Schrodinger are my favorites and I love them more than anything. Their relationships with each other and on their own absolutely drive me insane.

Tesla in general is a huge favorite of mine because of just how she is. Her story + how interesting the historical aspects about her are (I won't go into detail because it's a long rambling but it's interesting to me.) Plus I love how she depicts ADHD because it aligns with my own experiences and it makes me happy lmao. Especially with her relationship with Einstein.

Einstein is tied with Tesla just because they're a pair and I refuse to separate them. She's a nice person but is mischevious and and will not hesitate to tease her friends and I love it. There's a shit ton of other stuff I want to say about her but I don't know how to word it, so it'll just be an add on for later maybe.

Schrodinger.. I love her so much I want to throw her. Like yes she attempted murder however we all have our silly little moods. Joking aside I'm so sad that she's not appearing in the main story more.. Her relationship with Reanna, Tesla, and Einstein should've been expanded upon more and the fact it wasn't kills me. Kira came home from war why can't Schrodinger </3

Welt Joyce is good, but he's not my favorite tbh. I don't think about him much. His lores interesting and he's sweet, but I just can't get myself to get attached or really be invested beyond looking into historical aspects (i.e. me starting to read James Joyce's works to see if there's anything relating to him there.) That's not to say I hate him, quite the opposite actually. It's just. He's not a character for me essentially. He's well written and he deserved better tbh. He's also my friends favorite so he's basically a fav in law.

Joachim / Welt Yang I don't really have an opinion on. He's interesting, but I tend to avoid stuff about him for my own reasons. Him and Bronyas father daughter relationship is really sweet to me though.. I love it. Though also I'm still interested on where that man went when he ran away from his moms with ADA. What was he doing during all that time.

Cocolia is someone I want to punt into the sun along with the Welt Joyce clones. I support womens rights and wrongs however she tried over throwing Tesla and Einstein and had full intention on getting Einstein either killed or trapped in the SoQ. I will support your rights and wrongs until said crimes are against my favorites. (I like her character / story I just hate her as a person.)

The Welt Joyce clones unironically remind me of emo boy band members who probably have a few crimes on their criminal records. Wanna be cool kids but really everyone hates them.

Planck and Karl (I know he's technically not apart of AE but he's an honorary member in my book) are my beloveds. I love them both. Insane midlife crisis lady and father figure who is just there. I know Karl has 2 lines and we know nothing about him but I'm delusional.

I hate Edison with a passion. I unironically hate her more than Otto. I'm not elaborating. There's nothing redeeming about her and I wish she didn't exist.

Joffrey is just a child. I don't know what is going on with him At All.

Sin Mal is just kinda. There. I forget she exists in HI3rd tbh. I mainly know her from HG2..

ADA my beloved. I love her. She deserved better. Come back from war I miss you honey.

Reanna Brigantia... I loved her so much. She was such a sweet person and deserved SO much better than what happened to her in the end.

I think this is all of the major characters? I could've put the Schicksal Valkyries in here since they all were apart of AE at some point but they're with Schicksal again so.

[novitaeva]

Tu es ma joie de vivre

sok Prancis gimana gitu ya judulnya, tapi ini akan merepresentasikan isi tulisan blog ini tentang la personne que j'aime~

really thought sharing these feelings would be one of the hardest things for me, but lemme try.

“I am not afraid of getting hurt because I know how to create beauty out of everything.” -Maryam Hasnaa

1. BEFORE

I love your energy and let me explain myself a little more. You deserve to know and hear how truly amazing you are, and it is quite unfortunate that letters like this aren’t written to people more often. First, as you know, I think you are absolutely hilarious and I love that we can build off each others humor. But it is not just your wit and your intellectual humor. I love how silly you are. You are fun, you make life fun. I love how you are just yourself; weird, silly, quirky, childish, and goofy. You don’t even need to try, you are just pure light. You are someone who fills me up with so much laugher and joy. 

Kira-kira begitu di masa “before”, eh maksudnya apa tuh kok ada chapter before? karena saat ini rasa-rasanya sudah memasuki fase yang berbeda, untuk jadi pembeda mari kita bagi menjadi 2 chapter.

Tentu saja berada dalam fase ini kayak naik kora-kora, segala macam rupa perasaan bercampur aduk tapi paling banyak “upset”nya sih. 

Senangnya lebih banyak ke doa positif yang gue haturkan ke Allah SWT untuk kemaslahatan YBS di dunia maupun akhirat.

Untuk fase before pasti pernah dialami kebanyakan orang, bedanya di persepsi masing-masing untuk memahami perasaannya sendiri. Kalau gue memutuskan untuk confes.

Pertama kali dalam hidup gue melakukan hal itu, kalau dipikir-pikir gue sadar kahhh saat itu??? 

ya sadar dong~ gue punya mulut dan otak, dapat dipergunakan secara efektif untuk berkomunikasi.

berikut lirik lagu heart shaker by twice, yang sangat merepresentasikan perasaan saat itu.

Courage macam apa yang dipunyai orang penakut macem gue?

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but simply moving on with dignity despite that fear.” ~ Pat Riley

ohh ternyata begindang.

long short story, kita melompat ke fase after.

2. AFTER

Fase inilah yang membuat gue mau menulis topik ini, mau baca lagi 5 tahun kemudian tentang hari ini haha. “When nothing goes right, go left.”

Btw, jujur kurang paham kapan masuk di fase ini tapi kalau diingat-ingat, sudah sejak sadar berkali-kali bersedih. Halah ini kenapa jadi sedih-sedihan.

Kadang lupa tapi kadang salah tingkah mau gimana, lebih ke merindukan hal-hal indah yang pernah dilakukan berdua walau sedikit (banget) haha. Baru-baru ini melihat dirimu melantukan “i love you” ke ntah siapa melalui IG story, membuat gue berkontemplasi hal-hal yang terjadi di before. Mungkin kalau postingan ini dipost 2 tahun lalu, gue akan gimana ya~ apakah melompat dari pohon toge? atau pohon pare? nobody knows~

Kontemplasinya cukup lama dan membuat kaget, bacanya sih sambil senyum2 sendiri macem kesirepan jurig cewe centil~ karena isinya tentang bahasa Indonesia mengenai kata Sayang dalan bahasa Indonesia yang mana bisa ekspresi “love” atau “hadeh”. Hal ini seketika membuat ngakak inget KAK Acara yang dibuat rekan kerja si Alfian, mengawali paragraf isinya “sayangnya” wkwkw bayangiiinn di KAK acara dinas.

Langsung relate dengan apa yang dimaksud YBS, tapi gue nangkepnya kok sedih ya, apakah iya dia putus? tapi gak tau deh~ semoga tidaks karena doa gue selalu untuk kebahagiaan lu sih.

Per-hari ini rasanya samar di fase after, tapi hari-hari sebelumnya bold banget haha. Ternyata “Moving on doesn’t mean you forget about things, it just means you have to accept what happened and continue living.”~ Erza Scarlet.

Hmm betul juga tuh,  am i finally going to get off this roller coaster? I didn’t give up, I didn’t resign, I have simply accepted the unavoidable truth. 

I will keep our best memories together somewhere inside of me, it is not my goal to erase them entirely. They are part of me, part of my life. 

I wish you good luck and all the best for what lies on your path ahead!!

(alah apasi, gue yakin ini tidak akan dibaca YBS makanya berani menulis, POV yang ditujukan untuk YBS cukup gue sampaikan dari hati melalui bahasa qolbu haha)

[newsafeconfinement]

RESIDENT EVIL HEADCANNONS BECAUSE AUUGGHHHHHHHH

request more people, its abt 1am and im about to conk

chris:

- filipino, but his and claire's adoptive family are white

- contrary to popular belief, hes never used steroids. he just loves his partners. ( @kernelpanicart and i's funny headcannon)

- nd: obvi ptsd and amnesia, but he also strikes me as the autistic type: my autistim sense is tingling when i look at him

- in a "everyone lives" scenario, he defo dates jill, piers, maybe wesker, and leon, and theyre all in a poly relationship

- trans but transitioned pretty early in life

- bisexual asf

jill:

- keeping the canon french/japanese bc yes

- hates all forms of makeup. not even for formal events. over her dead body would she wear makeup. youd have to hold her down to put it on.

- dating chris, leon, and carlos because 💞

- she marries them and doesnt cry while the boys are openly weeping

- trans!!! transwoman!!!!

- absolutely completely bisexual as hell

piers:

- whiteboy (terminal)

- has the hardest time focusing because of chris. he cant help it. chris sexy :(

- just dating chris

- demisexual and bi

- trans too because he got the tboy swag

leon:

- also a whiteboy (terminal)

- in my stars!leon au hes been caught making out with every single stars member. even wesker.

- the members affectionately called him "leon slutboy kennedy"

- dating chris like a little BITCH (but also makesout with helena when he can) and also ashley and luis

- trans

- bisexual

brad vickers (sorry im a brad stan):

- columbian

- GOD i could talk abt my brad hcs all day

- i might make a post abt him alone. hes so silly

- trans and doesnt really want to completely transition

- bi and proud

- annoys wesker

- also wesker's boyfriend because hehehehehehehehe

- and jill's

- and all of stars

- he loves his partners and snuggles them all the time

wesker:

- cunt (whiteboy, more specifically FRENCH)

- dating: chris, jill, brad, william birkin, and rebecca

- before you say it

- him and rebecca thoroughly talked it through, and do not have sex or any sort of major flirtation WITHOUT rebecca first engaging

- im mixed on the trans idea tbh

- pansexual

william birkin:

- dont get me started on the whiteboy.

- him and annette are in a open relationship and hes with wesker too

- loves his daughter so much

- honestly i feel like if he saw sherry in re6, he would be so proud of her

- bisexual? more like. more li. i dont have anything clever to say

sherry birkin:

- japanese/american (i like referencing the re2 concepts of annette bc i like variety in my women, so i feel shes japanese)

- also i feel like shes not like. completely thin like in re6. "oh but guuiiiii shes training with the government! she should be small!!!" no shut up. she deserves a little bit of plus sized body as a treat.

- JAKE WIFE'D HER.

- adores jake, even if work makes them not see eachother as much

- whenever theyre both home, they just hold eachother

- loves halloween and makes her own costumes

- cis

- defo bisexual

jake:

- white (french/eastern european, ukranian most likely)

- loves his wife

- sherry makes sure on his missions thathe eats properly

- doesnt really understand halloween but loves that sherry makes them both costumes

- sherry's definately helped him experience more western things

- cis

- bisexual

ashley:

- whitegirl

- dating leon and luis

- shes their self control bimbo

- has cried to the stupidest things

- she defo smokes ouid with luis and leon for fun

- we know what that always leads to, dont we?

- cis

-pansexual

finn:

- chinese/native-american

- has feelings for piers and chris but never will talk about it

- piers and chris do notice his heart eyes tho

- trans

- gay gay homosexual gay

ada:

- chinese

- full fledged lesbian that makesout with claire to piss off chris

- cis

claire:

- filipino, but also raised by white people so she doesnt really know that

- bi

- transwoman but doesnt get bottom surgery bc she doesnt wanna

barry:

- all american dad

- trys to stay up to date with everything so he can stay close to his daughters, but unironically says "yeet" instead of "yes"

- hes just my dad basically

rebecca:

- japanese/american

- literally adores wesker

- she patches him up after rough missions and talks about what shes been working on to keep him calm

- cis

- probablt bi? shes questioning mostly

[fabricated-misslieness]

pairing: dazai osamu x sadistic male reader

req: yes | wc: 823 | TW: dazai’s usual thing, otherwise under the cut | part 1

anon: I was kinda hoping you could do a part 2 to the dazai x sadistic male reader? Like if he does end up in the agency or not?

a/n: i haven’t watched bsd in a year so there are many details i do not remember.

tw: mentions of nightshade and half joking about death

Normal life was indeed quite mundane. You’re not even sure what the appeal to it is anymore nor why you even yearned for one anyway.

Or well, perhaps you wanted a normal life with Dazai.

The entrance exam for the Armed Detective Agency had come to you quite abruptly, not to mention the fact that you weren’t at all informed of it and you didn’t have any time to prepare either. Actually now that you think about it, they were extremely underestimating your morals.

There was a kid they put you up against to fight –Tanizaki Naomi, you later learned; the little shit put up a great act– had her on these fake pills and all: immunity to pain, super strength, all the like. They sound silly, though considering all the possibilities that abilities could entail, you didn’t doubt it.

Now you were sadistic, that much was obvious, but you had morals. You weren’t just gonna beat up the living hell out of this teen. Granted, granted, she did get on your nerves. Punched you in the face after all!

However, she had a life ahead of her. You didn’t want to ruin that. Most people deserve a second chance, and these folk, the ADA, gave you that chance –though you did want to have a little “friendly” fight with all of them.

Anyway, you were able to subdue her without using your ability.

After that, you were welcome into the big family that called themselves a detective agency.

The problem was, though, that there was a warrant for your arrest. While it’d been lifted now that you worked with them, you were still not a friendly face to the public.

You were both a former Port Mafia member and Guild member, both associations that have or have tried to take control over Yokohama. As such, it might be a little controversial to send you out into the world with only a “trust me, I’ve changed” as proof of your innocence.

So that’s how you’re here, in a normal home, with a full time normal job, and a ‘normal’ boyfriend.

“What are you doing bent over the trash can?” He sounds amused, and frankly, he should be.

You stay quiet for a second, frozen at your spot. If you moved away from the trash can, even if you may do so subtly, he could look at it. On the other hand, staying in your place wouldn’t help either. “I disintegrated another cup.” You sigh.

While the president’s abilities certainly dampened your ability’s power to a certain extent, you were now available to control it further. You no longer needed all 5 fingers but rather any form of touch, along with the fact that you could actually touch people with a full hand now. It was… quite the change, really.

The thing was though that you didn’t need to think about disintegrating whenever you touched something, rather, you had to think about not disintegrating it. For example, if you hold a cup in your hand, you have to think about not disintegrating it.

It used to be tedious, but after all this time, it blended right into your subconscious.

Dazai’s importance to you –in relation to your ability, that is– had greatly decreased, actually. Not that it affected your feelings for him, of course not, but it was certainly nice to poke fun at him for it; in fact, his small habit of grabbing the back of your elbow had persisted.

However, as the active ADA member of the house, he wasn’t here often.

“I knew it.” He snickers. “How could you forget?”

“Oh shut up,” You roll your eyes, “It’s actually very easy to forget, not that you would know.” As far as you knew, his ability was the same as always. He didn’t have to think about activating it or vice versa.

Dazai prances right up to you, planting a kiss on your cheek.

“So, how was your day?” You say as you grab a new cup –you had many, just in case– from the cabinet and start cleaning the dust off.

“It was boring.” He says without so much as thinking.

“Mhm,” That’s his response every day. “You say everything’s boring.”

“That’s because everything is boring!” He collapses against your back and sighs dramatically, “Anything is boring without you, my belladonna!”

His little show caused you to disintegrate the cup a little, by accident of course. “Dazai!” You groan, setting the cup down on the sink with a loud clunk.

“What? What is it?” He stands up quickly, staring at the source of the clunk. “Oh.” He bursts out laughing quickly after that, holding onto your shoulder and the counter for support.

You don’t know what’s so funny.

His laugh was starting to get slightly irritating. You grab him by the collar, “Stop laughing you little sh-”

“Remember to stop your powers; or not, I don’t mind. Not the best way to go, but I hope it’s quick- gah!” Dazai groans when you drop him right on the ground, which by the way, he deserved.

“You’re disgusting.”

[zodiyack]

Some Good in Our Lives

Pairing: Thomas Shelby x Female!Reader

Warnings: Jealousy, angst

Words: 975

Key: Italic + small font = thoughts, italic + small font + bold = narration (Thomas narrating)

Summary: Wherein a brother's jealousy causes more than one heart to break, as well as two very important people in his life to be angry with him and the woman he loves to leave his life.

Note: Saw this prompt/challenge on tiktok and decided to give a go at it! The original prompt is at the end if you'd like to try! Also, sorry if Tommy seems a little out of character, although I said I wanted to try my go at this prompt, the key-word is try. (And I’m finishing that last request)

Masterlist | Peaky Blinders Masterlist | Cillian Murphy Masterlist

Taglist: @matth1w, @redspaceace-writes, @fandom-puff, @darling-i-read-it, @simonsbluee, @captivatedbycillianmurphy, @jenepleurepasbaby, @sebastianstanslefteyebrow, @stuckysslag, @psychkunox, @i-love-superhero, @marquelapage​, @peakyxtommy​, @stydia-4-ever, @babylooneytoonz​

'Deep down, I knew they didn't deserve it.' Please just leave

'Ridiculous.' Tommy thought, smoke pooling from his lips as he flicked the cigarette between his fingers and watched as the cheery woman greeted the other men in the bar. 'Those pigs don't deserve her smiles.' Then she made her way to the open door of the private booth belonging to the Shelbys.

"Good evening John, Arthur, Tommy."

"What's so good 'bout it?"

She turned back to Tommy, brows furrowed, "Pardon?"

"I said, what's so good about this evening? Bunch of drunk men and an annoying little girl who doesn't seem to take a hint."

His brothers looked down, avoiding the tension straining the room the best they could. However, they couldn't help but listen to the exchange taking place before them.

"I'm not a little girl, Thomas. I'm a woman. A woman who deserves respect at that." She spoke bluntly, eyes dropping into a glare. "If you'd rather me stop simply being nice to you, than that's on you." She turned back to the two sitting quietly. "It was nice to see you, gentlemen. I apologize for the inconvenience you were cursed with."

Arthur chuckled, "What inconvenience might that be, Y/n?"

"Of having him as a brother."

With that, she turned and walked right out, making sure to slam the door behind her. Unbeknownst to Y/n, and Tommy's brothers, Tommy smiled a bit. 'That'a girl.'

His actions weren't genuine, not that she knew that. He appreciated her greeting him every day, but his jealous side couldn't help but get the better of him.

She was an innocent woman as well, and everyone knew that the Shelby boys weren't great company for those of clean mind. He'd always said that she was too good for this world, but never once would he admit his feelings aloud.

His brothers flirted too much for comfort, the men in the garrison as well. He didn't want her hanging around them. Tommy didn't care if it was fair or not, nor did he care if people thought it was cruel.

He loved her too much to do anything else.

"Why're you so mean to her?" Arthur asked. He looked ahead at the woman in question, Y/n laughing with Ada as they drank.

Tommy followed his brother's eyes, "Why do you ask?"

"You like her, don't you Tom?" he chuckled.

"What makes you say that?"

"Many things...Pol thinks you do. Pol's always right."

'I’d never been more frustrated with that woman and her great skill to see through me. I’d looked up to her most my life, and I know she was just doing what was good for me, Arthur too, but I was an idiot.'

“Pol also has no place in this.”

“You can say that Tom, but I side with her on this one.” He shook his head and continued to drink peacefully.

Thomas became tormented with thoughts of the simple conversation. Things he knew to be false, such as Arthur chasing Y/n’s affection, came to mind and made him grow an even deeper shade of red...figuratively that is. The blinder was skilled in keeping a blank facade.

After he’d decided that he’d had just about enough with the trouble his mind was causing him, he stood up and walked to the women he and Arthur had been watching.

“Y/n.”

She paused, laughter falling quiet, and turned, the joy on her face suddenly dropping. Tommy would be a liar if he were to say that his heart didn’t ache at her response, but he is also far too stubborn to openly admit such.

“Leave.”

“Excuse me?”

“I said leave, Y/n. The pub is no place for silly little girls. You too Ada, you best be off as well.”

“You’re just as much in charge of me as you are of her,” Ada scoffed.

“I didn’t ask whether I was in charge of you or not. I told you to leave.”

The pub slowly began to grow quiet as more and more people started to stare at the event unfolding in front of them. “I’ll do no such thing, Thomas.” Y/n crossed her arms.

“Did I ask if you would?”

“Did I ask if you asked?”

He rolled his eyes, “I’m tired of your childishness-”  bar.

’I tried to plead, “Please, just go home, this isn’t a safe place”...but I was fool who persistently chose to use cruelty over simply saying those three daunting words.' 

“And I’m tired of you treating me like a child.” Y/n nodded.

“Then why don’t you grow up and act like a damn woman?” His words were, just as he’d said, childish and his argument was weak. However, Y/n had been yelled at by the man she once looked to with great admiration far too much tonight.

Gasps sounded throughout the room, Tommy clenched his jaw, and Y/n stood her ground with knitted brows. They stood like that for a moment or two, neither making a move until Y/n looked around. She looked back to Arthur and gave him a sorry nod before turning and leaving the bar quietly.

The pub never once returned to rowdiness that night.

"Where's Y/n?"

Arthur lifted his head, eyes darting back and forth. "You didn't hear?" Thomas shook his head, causing Arthur to sigh. He felt great sympathy for his brother but he also felt somewhat angry with him.

"She had it, really Tom. Broke her good, that you did." A weak chuckle left his mouth, attempting to hide the true sadness visible on his features.

"Not just that, Tom, but you pushed her past the edge. She moved to America, said to tell you she's sorry for being such an inconvenience." John rose from his seat, anger in his eyes, "Had to go an' ruin some good in our lives didn't you?"

All he could do was take a seat and look down in shame. He did this. He was the cause of her leaving, and he knew it. As he lit a cigarette, he thought to himself. Not only did he hurt his brothers, but he hurt her.

'Deep down, I knew they didn't deserve it.'

I suck at conflict lmao

Write a short story or make a short film with a narrator and have the beginning of the story start with them saying "deep down, I knew they didn't deserve it." and the narrator is like jealous of another character because something good happens to them and then the narrator does something- ruins their life, spreads nasty rumors about them, something like that, but at the end, the same line is said. "Deep down, I knew they didn't deserve it."

The first time, it's said with jealousy, the second, it's an admission of guilt.

[forallthatitsworth]

Choices Fandom Shoutout Day

Firstly, I have to send all my thanks to the wonderful @choicesfandomappreciation and @lovealexhunt for running this event and the constant work to connect the fandom and always boosting creators! I have spent half the night scrolling through everyones posts, discovering new people and appreciating the happiness it has brought so many!

About a year ago I gave up ghost reading everyones blogs and caved by making an account. Slowly but surely I have come to connect with amazing people who, god knows why, have shown me so much kindness! Thank you so much for being the best discovery this last year! ❤️❤️❤️

@burnsoslow I swear you were the first person to ever reach out to me and I don't think you'll ever know how much I appreciated it as a 'small fish is a big pond'! You are such a supportive rock to everyone and your kindness shines in every post. Don't even get me started on your incredible storywriting and the ability to make me love Drake as a die hard Liam fan hahaha! I love you Burnsy ❤️

@argylemnwrites considering we spend most conversations saying “that’s exactly how I felt” - you are such a joy to speak to and beyond talented at telling a story so real and raw that I completely forget the origin characters come from a pixelated game haha! ❤️

@choiceskatie omg so basically the only person who understands what I’m talking about when I get excited 😂 I read ‘Gone Girl‘ before I made my account and the excitement when I stumbled across your blog again AND finding out your a fellow Scot?! Hell yes!!! 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿❤️ You deserve all the love and I’ll always be here, reading your master list to death!

@utterlyinevitable you deserve all the appreciation, all of the time! You are constantly creating incredible works of art with your storylines whilst promoting everyones works, allowing everyone to discover a whole host of incredible writers! ❤️ (Please teach me how you find the time!)

@ao719 when I say you are the reason I caved and made an account, you really are! You write the best Liam who makes me all heart eyes and no matter the story, I get hooked and spend the whole night binging the storylines! So talented it’s crazy ❤️

@sincerelyella such a bright star of endless love and praise for everyone around you! ❤️ I always see you picking people up on a down day and I hope you know people are always here for you! I love the Worlds you create in your stories and how strong a character you have built in Ella!

@queenrileyrose you made me SO emotional over a story and create such beautiful and unique storylines! Your imagination is just so special! ❤️

@kat-tia801 you have such an art at creating storylines where you fall in love with every OC and MC, each are so special ❤️ (also you are single handedly the reason I finally played Perfect Match and Laws of Attraction, pretty sure Choices owe you commission!)

@terrm9 honestly like sunshine in a bottle! Its silly the talent you have to transform the characters and evoke such emotion over such delicate topics! You always lift people up with your endless kindness ❤

@the-pale-goddess Tiffany is that bad bitch MC that I am obsessed by! I must read ‘Blind’ like every other week because it’s just stuck in my head. You throw every emotion at a story and I’ll just thank you 😂❤️

@txemrn holy shit, you are talented! Like crazy respects to you and the storylines you create. You treat everything with such care, little throw away lines in early chapters which prove crucial to the story and every MC seems so personal!

@jamespotterthefirst Lilac is such an iconic MC and I’ll never see ADA in anything without thinking of Lilac first! You keep the fandom going with everything and I know it can be a thankless task so a huge thank you for it all! ❤️

@bbrandy2002 ❤️ @perriewinklenerdie ❤️@genevievemd ❤️ @estellaelysian ❤️@alwaysmychoices ❤️ @alj4890 ❤️ @ofpixelsandscribbles ❤️@bayleedrawsx❤️ @lucy-268 ❤️ @liaromancewriter ❤️ @jerzwriter ❤️ @axwalker ❤️ @chemist-ana

I am typing this out before bed and I just know I’m gonna wake up in the middle of the night because I have forgotten people, I am SO sorry! I also should apologise for my rambles 😩

Anybody who has ever liked a posted, sent a message or even replied to a comment, please know you never failed to brighten my day so thank you 🌟

[australiancarisi]

Sonny Carisi ~ It Reminded Me of You

the inspiration for this was literally a Ben & Jerry's ad on my facebook Not spon but B&J if you wanna sponsor me hit me up ada!Sonny x Detective!Reader A non-covid world all errors are my own v sorry words: 1365

It felt like weeks since you’d actually spent quality time with Sonny. You didn’t even have to be doing anything you could just sit next to him while he sat on his phone for hours just as long as you were actually with him, that’s all you cared about. It was so much easier when you were both working as detectives, sure you were working and being professional but you were just with him more often than not.

Now that he’s an ADA however, it feels like your schedules just never line up. And yes of course you still get to work with him it’s just not the same level.

You texted Sonny earlier in the day to see how his workload was going, hoping he’d be home at a reasonable hour. It was Friday and you had the full weekend off, not even on call. Liv even promised the only way you’d get called in was if it was a matter of national security. She’d seen how down and exhausted you had been lately and she wasn��t having it - Mama Benson will not let anything happen to her people.

When Sonny replied saying he’d managed to plead out his most pressing cases and that he see you at his place for an actual home-cooked meal and a weekend of doing nothing, you felt yourself burst with happiness.

You were packing up your stuff for the night saying goodbye to Kat and Amanda as they walked out when your phone rang.

A dopey grin spread across your face like always and Fin rolled his eyes, heading into Liv’s office.

“Hey Handsome, I’m just packing up my stuff should be at yours within the hour”

“Doll-“ you knew that tone, you knew it was gonna be bad, something had come up “I’m so sorry Hadid just handed me about 8 files that all are being arraigned on Monday, I’m gonna have to put a rain check on that meal” it wasn’t just going to be a rain check on the meal though, you knew Sonny and you knew he was going to work over the weekend. He put so much pressure on himself to make sure he did well and got the justice the victims deserved that he would exhaust himself on his only weekend off in about 3 months.

Tears welled in your eyes, you looked to the ceiling and blinked them away, determined not to let any fall.

Taking a deep breath to steady your voice before replying, “it’s okay Son really, work is more important”

“Nothing is more important than you Doll” you smiled sadly at his words

“I love you Sonny, it’s okay there will be more dinners and lazy weekends”

“Are you sure?”

“Of course bub, I love you” you reassured him.

“I love you too Doll, I’ll be home as early as I can”

Home.

It wasn’t official but you had basically been living at his apartment lately in an attempt to see each other a little more.

You hung up the phone, throwing it a little aggressively on your desk as Fin and Liv came out of her office. With tears still in your eyes, you sat down and looked up at the two of them.

“y/n...” Olivia started, she knew your plans with Sonny had fallen through, she always just knew.

“Don’t Liv. Please. Because if you say anything I’m gonna cry and I won’t be able to stop” you sighed your voice cracking slightly

“Do you wanna go for a drink? I’m sure phoebe won’t mind” Fin smiled sadly

“N-no” you cleared your throat “no I’m fine I’ll just get some more paperwork done here. You go home”

“Nope, you are not staying here. Go home y/n, get some rest” Liv pulled you up from your best wrapping an arm around you

“Sometimes I just wish he was still here” you whispered

“I know... me too...” Liv sighed

You said goodbye to Fin and Liv out the front of the precinct, reassuring them both that you were in fact okay and grabbed a cab back to Sonny’s apartment.

“Actually just let me out here… Thanks” you smiled to the driver, handing over the money and jumping out of the cab and walking straight into the 7/11.

You walked around the small 7/11 store trying to decide what you wanted. At this point you didn’t really feel like anything, you just wanted Sonny. You spotted the ice cream and well if you weren’t going to get to spend the night with Sonny at least you could spend it with Ben & Jerry. You took your time scanning the different flavours, a very important decision.

Cookie dough...Strawberry cheesecake...Chunky Monkey...

Then your eyes saw it. You grabbed the pint of ice cream and paid, quickly walking up to Sonny’s apartment.

Sonny rubbed his face in exhaustion and sadness. It felt like he hadn’t made any progress in the past hour on any of the cases he had been handed just before he was about to head out the door. He’d had such a plan for the weekend. Tonight he was going to cook your favourite meal and spend the night on the couch watching whatever stupid romcom you could find on Netflix. He planned to take you out on Saturday, walks in the park and maybe the art gallery and then Sunday, his favourite day, he was going to let you sleep in as long as you wanted and make you your favourite breakfast in bed and spend the day doing absolutely nothing. He was going to turn your phones off and spend the day lying in bed, order in any food you guys wanted because it was going to be the last day of just the two of you for probably a while. And now it was all gone to shit because of these cases in front of him.

Sonny loved being an ADA but right now he wished he never left the NYPD. Groaning as his phone pinged with a message he looked at it. It was Liv.

I know you are busy but please go home to girlfriend and get some rest, she needs you

Sonny frowned and typed out his reply

is she okay?

she just misses you Sonny and knowing you, you miss her too

how’d you know i was even still here?

The reply was just a screenshot of Liv’s find my friend's app. Sonny let out a laugh and sent back a heart before packing up his stuff and heading home.

When Sonny finally walked through the door of his apartment it was just before 10pm. Much earlier than you’d expected him. You shot up from the couch when you heard someone at the front door.

“Hey Doll” Sonny smiled putting his briefcase down at the door and shrugging his suit jacket off, letting it fall to the floor without a care in the world

“Sonny!” you ran to him and all but jumped in his arms. It felt silly but you really had missed him.

“I’m sorry Doll” he mumbled into your hair

“what for?”

“for messing up our plans, I feel like I just keep cancelling everything” he sighed

“hey” you pulled back from the hug and cupped his face making him look at you “do not feel bad. I understand, your job is important. Hell, how many times have I been called away? This is just how it is, but I’d rather only spend 5 minutes with you than a lifetime with someone else”

“I love you so much doll” Sonny blushed brushing his lips against yours “I’ll have to work a bit tomorrow but I’ll get everything done and then it’s just you and me all day Sunday” he held his pinky up to you “pinky promise” you grinned wrapping your finger around his. Sonny kissed your hand before leading you over to the couch. “now who replaced me tonight?”

“Chris Evans” you grinned flopping down onto the chair. Sonny reached for the ice cream on the coffee table “oh, and Ben and Jerry”

“Cannoli flavoured?”

“It reminded me of you” you whispered, snuggling into his side.