#actually I just call that being autistic

[shadow0-1]

First meet

[space-batzz]

Art Fright 2024

smoke and mirrors prompt + foggy forest color palette with (an aged up version of) Carrie Krueger from tawog

[mollypaup]

i think a really great aspect of oofuri is how much it gets mihashi's ass for being overly timid and dependent. it would be really easy to write off the way he and abe interact as being abe's fault because he is overbearing, and a lot of people do, but it has some really great moments of going "hey, you cannot hide behind abe or depend on him to make every decision. it's not good for you, or him, or the team."

[halfusek]

meet weles! he's my sniffer oc :] he is perun's boyfriend <3

he's this kind of lizard except his leggies are like petrified wood. oh also there's plants and stuff growing on him. normal lizard things

[equalperson]

something that far too few people--including other autistics--acknowledge about higher-support autism is the defenselessness that comes with it, namely when you don't have a high-quality caregiver or support system.

so many people only talk about the impairments that come with low-support autism, the things that you can easily cope with through self-accommodation, sensory aids, and understanding; so little attention goes out to those of us who can't help ourselves, at least not enough to remain physically safe and healthy on our own.

I'm visibly dirty (dermatitis neglecta) because I have anxiety attacks when I try to task-switch and bathe. nearly a quarter of My teeth are decayed because I go months without brushing. at the time of writing, I've lost over 3% of My body weight in the past month due to inertia preventing Me from eating more than once a day.

I can't simply use a schedule or set alarms, because I end up not acknowledging either of them (except to turn the latter off). the "simple fixes" that low-support autistics recommend offer little-to-no improvement for Me.

that's ultimately the difference between low-support autism and medium/high-support autism: someone with LSN can accommodate themself enough to stay afloat, whereas someone with MSN/HSN literally needs another person to do some or all things for them.

because of this, people whose caregivers believe they don't need assistance (My situation), believe their autism can be disciplined away, are too careless or busy to help them, and those who don't have and can't easily access a caregiver at all are left in a totally isolated position.

at best, either our caregivers' attitudes or our autism miraculously improve and we're able to get our needs met. at worst, we continuously suffer until we experience a medical crisis from the neglect or seriously injure (if not kill) ourselves for the same reason.

this isn't to say that autism--even higher-support autism--is all horrible, but I really do wish that more autistic advocacy focused on relieving this helplessness, rather than just the self-advocacy of low-support individuals.

[spyroz]

Being non dysphoric trans at least for me is more of a political statement than a description of literal reality. It says "I'm for bodily autonomy in all circumstances and without explanation" but it does also say "I love my trans body"

Every person in the world would likely become 'dysphoric' if described or gendered or viewed in a way antithetical to their self image, trans or otherwise. So pulling the "erm technically you do have dysphoria" response just isn't necessary. We already know this. It depends on how you define the word "dysphoria", but idgaf about semantics like that, my goal is simply to send a message and describe myself in the *closest possible way* to the truth. But nothing is ever *entirely* true

People posting about how "non dysphoric trans people aren't really non dysphoric" are missing the point because dysphoric or nondysphoric was never a binary in the first place. These are made up words and I'm using the one closest to my experience, doesn't mean it has to fit 10000% of the time. It isn't so black and white, nothing is.

[giantkillerjack]

Uh-oh! You are like, SOOO awkward!!

You're so awkward that it is occasionally mildly uncomfortable for people!

You're so awkward that sometimes people are confused by you and then there are awkward silences!

You're so awkward ...... that ultimately no one is harmed!!

Oh damn!!! What a vile crime you have committed! What an unforgivable thing it is to make a fellow human briefly confused!

Why, if *I* were ever briefly confused and kind of uncomfortable as a result, I'd be devastated.... by the absolute net zero change in my happiness and health! - From which I might never recover!! Yes indeed! No punishment can ever be enough for you!!

So you better absolutely hate yourself for it.

Better be SO MEAN to yourself about every single missed social cue so you don't forget your horrible crime! Meaner than you'd ever dream of being to someone else for the same thing! This is YOUR responsibility!

You need to show the world that you KNOW you are bad by punishing yourself constantly! After all, think of all the people who BENEFIT from you punishing yourself! - No, really! Think about it! Think about who benefits from your pain.

Think of alllllll the definitely-good people that your definitely-necessary self-torment definitely helps! I mean, you can't just cut off their definitely-life-sustaining supply of your suffering, right?? Sure, everyone else has a breaking point, but you're probably the only person in human history who doesn't, right? Best not to question it probably. Sure, it's a symptom that billions of people with trauma have had, but who knows? You could be a one-in-seven-billion exception. Anything's possible!

Instead, better just accept that idea that bullies carry like guns in holsters - the idea that people who have trouble with social cues deserve to suffer. Better carry on the burden they placed on you until you drop. Aid the cause of the callous by enforcing shame and suffering upon yourself extra hard; try your best to do their work for them. They're very busy.

Better not recognize that you need patience and kindness to heal from your trauma. Better not find out that it was trauma rather than personal weakness filling your head with self-hating thoughts. Better not find out it wasn't your fault.

Better not find out that awkwardness is not inherently harmful or unkind, and, in fact, the people who act like it is *are the ones enacting harm and being cruel.*

Better not get righteously angry when you realize just how much unnecessary damage this has done to you. After all, if you get mad, you might realize you deserve better. You might even feel brave enough to DEMAND better! You might build boundaries that keep you safe! You might make other people think they deserve to feel safe too! And we obviously can't be having that, so...

Better not show yourself even a little kindness a little bit at a time.

Better not make a habit out of it after all that practice.

Better not get confident.

Especially if you can't first wipe out every trace of awkward. (And you probably never will. Because people who experience absolute social certainty at all times tend to be insufferable assholes that enforce the status quo. And you just don't have the stock portfolio for that.)

Better not be confident and awkward because then you might confuse and delight people

- you might accidentally end up making other people feel less shame for their social difficulties

- you might make isolated, traumatized, and shy people feel like they deserve to be included in social situations

- you might even make them feel they can be themselves around you

- you might start loving the effect you have on a room

- you might enjoy conversations more

- you might forgive yourself and bounce back from shame more easily and frequently

- you might come to enjoy some of those moments of harmless confusion you cause because NOBODY expects the Confident Awkward, and that can genuinely be an advantage in social situations

- you might stop apologizing so much.

- you might find that socializing is like a video game: it requires practice but also a safe space for it to be fun and positive.

Or if you can't become assertive and confident, better not remain awkward and shy and quiet, and then love and forgive yourself anyway!

Why, it would be carnage!!

In either scenario, you run the risk of finding out that it's not your fault that safe spaces full of kind people can be really hard to find, create, and nurture. You could end up building a skillset that helps you do those things if you're not careful!

If you start giving yourself even the tiniest amount of grace at a time, you will find that you've accessed a gateway drug with extreme long-term side effects:

- You might realize that it was never your fault that it took so long to like yourself.

- You might realize that you were always worth talking to, even when you didn't like yourself and communication felt impossibly difficult.

- You might realize that you'll still be worth talking to even if communication becomes harder as you age and/or experience disability.

- You might come to know that you deserve to be heard even on bad days when words come slow and blurry.

You might discover that you were always deserving of kindness, first and foremost from yourself.

So. As you can see, it's FAR too much of a risk to start granting your awkward self free pardons for your many heinous and harmless crimes. Better to just leave it there.

[pinkfey]

i have no friends who care about me because my personality is boring and understimulating and i have no selling point as a friend and i am being left behind

[nervousmonolith]

thinking about the whole twt scam situation ™ again ough

[simptasia]

being in the DS9 fandom, you'll discover there are so many ways for people to be wrong about julian bashir

[yardsards]

i'm not gonna tell people to ignore their intuition cuz 1: that's hella unsafe cuz intuition can be useful 2: it doesn't really help either party if you try to force yourself to befriend someone you Just Don't Like. but like.

i think a lot of times when neurotypicals mention like "i don't know what it is about that person, they just weird me out" the thing that they're subconsciously picking up on is just... autism.

like, just existing with autism feels like i am constantly exuding the social equivalent of the uncanny valley effect. growing up autistic felt like i was walking around with a face that looked like a haunted doll. and i learned all the tricks to make my face less scary to others, to cover it up, to over-compensate and make myself seem friendly and inviting in spite of the face. and it helped and people don't quite mock or revile me like they used to. but i still worry that there's still something about me that makes people seem to avoid me, often without them even consciously noticing they're doing it. and it's no one's fault but it just kinda sucks.

at least there are my fellow haunted dolls out there who understand. who don't see my porcelain face as something vaguely Wrong, who just see a face like theirs.

[slugass]

how to call out anti-autistic ableism:

USE A FUCKING BRAINLET, THE VISUAL VERSION OF CALLING SOMEONE THE FUCKING R-SLUR, SPECIFICALLY DESIGNED TO MOCK DISABILITY, BOTH PHYSICAL AND MENTAL, TO REPRESENT THE BIGOT, BECAUSE IT COULD NEVER BE NON-(MENTALLY) DISABLED PEOPLE DOING THE BIGOTRY MOST OF THE TIME, RIGHT???

I’M SURE THAT WON’T MAKE YOU LOOK HYPOCRITICAL AND ABLEIST AT ALL.

[autisticlee]

sometimes I think about how when I went to college for a year before I dropped out (basically failed out,) the counselors/dean told me they can't help me at all or give any accommodations unless I have an official autism/adhd diagnosis. that might sound logical at first, but when you think about it more, it's actually quite fucked up. if someone is struggling really bad, what's the harm in helping them? why do they require a paper to get even the smallest amount of help? people who don't need help aren't going to be failing miserably without help! even NTs could benefit from some adjustments to the horrible school system! (but changing the entire system is a whole other conversation that the school system isnt ready for)

but even if you do agree to jump through their hoops, you realize it's even more fucked up that the diagnosis process requires YEARS in most cases (in my case it took 4 or 5 years, can't recall exactly now, for autism/adhd diagnosis, which would have meant i finished school before getting it if i managed to mot fail out, or i wait that long before going back, which is a whole struggle itself) and they also tried billing me for THOUSANDS of dollars because of insurance issues!!

so you put a ton of time and money into this, and then get told the only accommodation they are willing to give you for autism and adhd is "a little extra time on tests"

....

my test scores were the best part of my whole class experience. that was NOT what I struggled with!!!!! those tests were all online and could be done in the comfort of your home where you can accommodate yourself and have plenty of time left over when you finish them because you are comfy in your own space, (and also, no one was stopping you from having your notes/books/google open to find the answers,) and you don't even need a time consuming, expensive diagnosis for that!

SO WHAT'S THE POINT!!!!!!!

[mooncalf87]

When the pookie sent you a tiktok proposal video and said "us" and she had you saved in her phone as

And here discord bio keeps going on about how she has a crush

[engagemythrusters]

“Neurospicy” lends itself to those who are able to be viewed as “quirky” by society. By using it as a replacement for “neurodivergent,” you are alienating a large population of the people who fall under that category.

[frobby]

I hate that disabled people need to be diagnosed to ask for accomodation. Accomodation should be available to everyone not just groups that *Need* it because if something makes someones life easier it should be available to them whether or not some doctor says its okay.