#above what i wrote up there
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*gets out of art slump by playing roblox spraypainting game* *epically*
#my art#oc#ocs#roblox#literally hadnt drawn in so long cuz i lost like 4 years of my art since my tablet exploded n the thing that gets me to draw again is Roblo#art#the stabilizer is so nice and everything feels so smoooooth i love it#game is called “realistic spray paint & donate” its really fun :]#dont know how to put these images i forgot abt like#above what i wrote up there#im not smart.#ive got more drawings i forgot to screenshot so hopefully ill remember to grab those#really wanna try n post my art more since ive gotten so much positive feedback in that game#gnight
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happy mother's day lmfao
bonus (the girls are fightiiing):
#and thus eddie caused a category 5 neighborhood disaster bc he tried to flirt via sandwich questions#which is a totally valid way to flirt. Totally.#what's more romantic than being able to bring people their favorite sandwiches without having to ask#idk im not a romantic. almost wrote tomantic. i dont like tomatoes either#welcome home#scribble salad#welcome home fanart#welcome home puppet show#in all honesty during last night's festive breakdown i had the doodled Thought above#and scribbled it in my phone notes#it feels good to not only have an Idea but to also Get It Out#yaknow? i dont get that often#brain usually has half a thought then fizzles out and decides to go lay down for a full week#also here's a niche concept that is incredibly funny to me:#a neighbor swearing and wally immediately being like NO!!! THE RATINGS!!!!#he has to snipe them before they can get the full word out. how sad :'{#alsoX2 special thanks to these doodles for keeping me awake#i had decided not to sleep when i drew this and i can't fall asleep before ten otherwise ill wake up 4 hours later wide awake#with no hope of getting back to sleep#and another s/o to barnaby for being incredibly pleasant to draw. he does not fight me like the others do
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Headcanon: Chilchuck and his Bad Takes on Literature
i think chilchuck would be like my mom in the sense that he wouldnt like sad stories. dont get me wrong, cautionary tales? absolutely fine. they serve a purpose to him which is to tell people "dont be an idiot and do this or else something bad will happen"
generally sad or angsty stories though? no point to him, and in his perspective its really confusing how people just read things that make them sad. like whats the use of reading something if its just gonna make you sad. whats the lesson? its not even real so it doesnt help anyone.
whats the point in making yourself cry when you could just avoid that entirely by not reading it at all?
but the one of the biggest reasons why sad stories exist is to let you release all the built up grief in you. to send you something to let out all your emotions in a healthy way. catharsis. empathy.
even when i dont relate to the tragic experiences in some stories, several ones ive read have lead me to realize that im in a bad situation or that im following in the footsteps of the character suffering. its like a wake up call.
and making yourself cry isnt inherently a bad thing. if crying allows you to let go of building pressure and tension in you then thats good!
but chil wouldnt see that. of course he wouldnt, hes avoidant of most situations that would allow him to release emotion, and fearful of letting his mature (read: repressed) persona slip.
hes someone that runs away to quick comforts and distractions at the earliest sign of issue. hes already been in too many horrifying situations, dealing with another is a pain. and he knows denying everything and refusing to look at the situation doesnt help, but it definitely provides a quick and easy happiness in the comfort of ignorance.
because of this, reading something made to make one empathize with and confront these bad emotions is defeating the point of his cowering. if he faces his issues, even if only through the perspective of a story, he'd have to deal with acknowledging that things are bad and need fixing, and he'd feel terrible and guilty in the moment - which of course is the worst thing that could happen to a person (his thought, not mine).
which is why i find the concept of him being/becoming a tragedy himself at the same time as this headcanon soooo interesting. imagine the irony of him bashing on the protagonists of tragic stories for acting on emotion and impulse rather than logic, when he himself has fallen victim to irrational thinking while in grief.
cause... thats what people do when they grieve. they lash out, make bad decisions, ruin themselves, ruin others.
for a tragedy to be prevented, the protagonists would have to change fundamental parts of themselves, and act perfectly rational when under extreme stress. and chilchuck holds himself to these kinds of unrealistic standards because he unwittingly believes he can handle it all.
he cant, obviously. we see it for ourselves in his relationship with his wife. they were doomed from the beginning by chils already-established avoidance and lack of emotional vulnerabiltiy (and whatever else his wife had going on).
this is all just to say that if you told him about orpheus and eurydice, he'd probably be one of those idiots trying to point out the "plot hole" that he couldve "just not looked back" and "just trusted her"
i dont understand. whats the point in reading tragedies? the protagonist is stupid, anyways. why would you take bitter medicine? why subject yourself to that?
i think its just a bad story.
#EDIT : SORRY THAT THERES NO PICTURES BY THE WAY I COULDNT BE BOTHERED TO LOOK FOR APPROPRIATE ONES IM SORRY!!!#hi. i wrote meta on accident#THIS WAS MEANT TO BE PART OF A JOKE BUT THEN I JUST KEPT GOING AND GOING AND I FORGOT TO MAKE THE JOKE PART OF IT SO NOW ITS 100% SERIOUS#to be fair i was always serious but i intended for it to be presented as a joke#this took me like 3 hours to write god help me#i did this instead of doing my homework. im toast#anyways. hi yes. chilchuck is a hypocrite#feel free to discuss about this cause i find it really interesting. theres layers to this mans hypocrisy HHSDHASHDDH#my fascination with chils avoidance like ive talked about above is the main motivation for tragedy au actually#imagine a world where he gets what he wants. he can change the narrative change himself and prevent anything that could possibly go wrong#and dream up a fantasy world where he can let go of all responsibility and his avoidant behavior has no consequences#id talk more about it but also im really sleepy and should be working so ill leave you with this for now#im... i gotta tag this man i worked too hard on it#chilchuck#chilchuck tims#dungeon meshi#yeagh. yeah!
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For the past couple of days, I've been tossing around the idea of an iterator OC who is focused around astronomy. I love astronomy, and there's a conspicuous lack of any information about it in Rain World, which I find pretty intriguing. (I made a post about some of my random theories here.) So, I started to think about what an iterator specifically designed to study astronomy might be like. I named them Three Stars Above Clouds (in reference to Orion's belt, because I can't help but put references to Orion in everything I do, I guess). I actually ended up having a lot of thoughts about them, which I'll detail below. (Warning, there's A Lot.)
Three Stars Above Clouds (TSAC) was designed and built by a splinter group of Ancients who believed the Solution to the Great Problem wouldn't be found deep underground, but in the sky. TSAC was created in order to help them collect data about the sky, house their institutions, and conduct research. They were built into a mountain range, where clouds are less likely to form and the air is thinner. (Real world observatories are often built on top of mountains or in arid places like deserts in an attempt to avoid interference from clouds and rain. You can't see the stars if they're hidden behind clouds, after all.)
Three Stars Above Clouds' city is home to several large observatories which keep a constant watch on the sky. I got the idea for TSAC in part from the currently-under-construction Large Synoptic Survey Telescope (also called the Vera C. Rubin Observatory). The LSST is designed to take ultra-high-definition pictures of the entire night sky every couple of nights, in order to monitor for changes. This data will be a treasure trove for astronomers, and can be used for anything from discovering new asteroids and rogue planets, to monitoring distant galaxies for supernovae. One problem that arises from this, however, is the sheer amount of data that this telescope will produce- it's way too much for any human to hope to be able to sift through. I imagine that the Ancients who built TSAC would run into a similar problem; TSAC's observatories generate colossal amounts of data, so a large part of TSAC's duties as an iterator are to sift through and analyze this data to find anything that might be useful in finding the Solution.
Three Stars Above Clouds is relatively isolated as an iterator. They are located at a much higher altitude than their peers, in the middle of a remote mountain range. Their citizens are also somewhat isolated from Ancient society at large, due to their fringe religious beliefs. (Due to the lack of anything astronomy or space-travel related in Rain World's lore, I think the Ancients either largely don't have an interest in studying astronomy, or it's considered taboo due to their religion's focus on ascension, as well as the subterranean Void Sea.)
As for Three Stars Above Clouds themself, they have a bit of a reputation for being a loner. Other iterators sometimes see them as obsessing over something pointless, because despite the vast amounts of data TSAC has collected, so far it's turned up nothing useful in terms of the Solution. However they are sometimes contacted by iterators who might be interested in their data, either for the purpose of research or just out of curiosity. TSAC is happy to talk about their personal research to anyone who is willing to listen.
Three Stars Above Clouds worked closely with their citizens while their city was still inhabited, and misses them deeply. Despite their citizens being gone, they continue with their sky surveys, partially because the desire to do so is hard-coded into their programming, and partially because it at least gives them something to do. Deep down, TSAC is convinced that someday they will come across something extraordinary among the stars.
In order to store the immense amounts of data generated by their observatories, TSAC's city and internal structure contain a wealth of data pearls, which has inevitably led to the amassing of a large Scavenger population both in and around their structure, who regularly raid TSAC's supply of pearls. However, due to TSAC's high altitude, their external structure and surrounding mountains are also home to large colonies of Vultures, which help control the Scavenger population, at the very least. TSAC is quite fond of Vultures for this reason.
The mountains are very cold, which means Three Stars Above Clouds' rain freezes almost immediately into snow and sleet, which falls down onto the surrounding mountains. As the glaciers and snowfall on these mountains melt, the water flows down the mountains into large rivers, and is collected in several dams at ground level. These dams are home to pumping stations which pump water back up into TSAC's can. TSAC's can is fed water through a vast array of underground pipes that snake underneath and through the mountains. The upkeep of these pipes is mostly automated, however, there are some issues that only an engineer can fix. With all of TSAC's engineers gone, their pipe network is extremely prone to failure due to its complexity. They've had a dam or two break in the past, and TSAC knows that it's only a matter of time before all of their dams break and they will lose their water supply for good.
Their void fluid filtration system is also similarly complex; mine shafts are scattered throughout the mountain range and reach deep underground to access the Void Sea. Even though TSAC's ancients don't think Void Fluid is the key to ascension, they still recognize its usefulness as a potent energy source.
These networks of tunnels, pipes, mines, and maintenance stations have become home to a wide range of creatures over the cycles, many seeking refuge from the cold. Maybe there's even a colony of subterranean Slugcats running around down there.
I've also made an annotated version of the drawing of TSAC's can; you can click on the alt text for transcriptions of my notes if you can't read my handwriting. One thing I forgot to note was the green lasers, those are Laser Guide Stars. (I just think they look cool.)
And here's a closer look at TSAC's city, because I'm pretty proud of the way it turned out. (I even snuck the LSST in there on the left, hehe.)
Aaaand I think that's everything! If I got any of the lore wrong, I apologize. Rain World's lore is pretty vague at times, and I tried to do the best with what I know. I also have a pretty strong grasp on astronomy, but not so much on climatology and geology, so if I got some of those things wrong as well, go easy on me, haha. X]
I will say, creating an iterator is an interesting thought experiment. You need to think about the effect they have on the surrounding environment, while keeping in mind that they're sentient and also have an entire city of people living on them that they need to help manage. Iterators are fascinating to me, and I love reading about other people's OCs and seeing the ways they're able to make them unique.
If you read this far, thank you for devoting some of your time to listening to me ramble. You get a gold star: ⭐⭐⭐
Edit: Here's a closeup of their in-game sprite as a reward for reading this far. Yippee
#my art#my ocs#rain world#rain world iterator#iterator oc#three stars above clouds#I PROMISE I will draw some of the canon characters soon. I just needed to get this guy out of my brain#I love iterators so much. rotating them in my mind#what if there was an enormous building that was also a Guy. Also it had Depression. Would that be fucked up or what#also holy shit I wrote so much. if you have the patience to read it all I love you#I came up with most of this during long commutes. I need to keep myself from going insane while sitting in traffic somehow#might as well make up a guy#this might as well be an iteratorsona. why the hell not lol#they’re extremely tailored to my interests#iterators
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Hi folks! It seems like people are discovering that there are people online who write some WEIRD! 👎 stuff for Nevermoor. Some tips and tricks for dealing with that:
Don't engage. Don't read the fics. Don't even comment to say how much you hate it.
Don't spread it around. It's gross as hell, I know! But being like "ew, guys, I found this gross fic" just means you're causing more people to seek out said gross fic, and that's just not great. If you don't want to see it, no one else wants to either.
If you can: block, mute, or filter. I don't really use any fanfic sites to know if these functionalities exist, but I'm sure people online have found ways. Edit: here's a way to do it on Ao3.
TL;DR: Ignore, Ignore, Ignore. 👍
(PS: Same thing goes for when people send weird inappropriate anon messages. Just delete them from your inbox and don't subject others to them.)
This is unfortunately something that's been present for years in the fandom, on both Ao3 and Wattpad. This is also why I essentially don't read Nevermoor fics unless they're for Mogtober, and even then I'm cautious. I have seen some weird stuff written about my favorite characters that I wish I could pluck from my brain and set on fire, or worse! But when I stumble across that stuff, I just quickly close the tab and pivot to something else to get my mind off of it.
We should not entertain these types of people in a fandom full of minors about a middle grade series, so: just don't engage with them, ignore them, filter them out, and maybe even drown them out with some fics of your own.
#good talk 👍#nevermoor#nevermoor fandom#nevermoor fanfic#why oh why does this fandom attract the occasional weirdo.#I'd be using stronger language when talking abt these types of folks but i'd prob get banned.#as an adult in this fandom I feel I have a responsibility to keep folks safe from weirdos 👍 i've banned folks on discord + i'd do it again#years ago there was a weird af fic on ao3 that I noticed folks were kudos'ing and I had to be like. hey guys pls don't do that 😭#unfortunately ao3 moderation and rules are NONEXISTENT!!! so there's nothing ppl can do except the stuff above :/#and I wouldn't know abt wattpad bc I went on there once to see what mogtober stuff ppl wrote and was horrified and noped out of there 😬#anyways. all the more reason to participate in mogtober. so everyone's writing stuff in order to bury the gross stuff. creation for a cause#(and bc mogtober is fun and everyone should participate. lol)#soz for the psa folks but I deemed it necessary 🤷 feel free to enjoy the art I just posted as well#just been on the internet toooo long and don't like the thought or reality of young folks being exposed in any way to this kind of stuff. 😕#couldn't figure out where to fit this emoji in so here: 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢. thats me and my constant feeling whenever this stuff pops up again. 😑
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The brainworms are winning, clearly (Patreon)
#Doodles#Osmosis Jones#Ozzy#Drix#Thrax#As if it wasn't bad enough when it was just Doran oh no - I knew I'd want a separate tag for this in earnest at some point ahhhh#Damned#Alright sure lol good enough - I'll go back and edit the tag in a bit#I just can't help it wahh the Institute is such a fun and interesting setting it scratches my brain in Such a way#It's been really fun poking around to see who's there but there are some who I'm like ''Why wasn't [x] there? :0''#Some make sense lol like characters that didn't exist/come into the cultural vogue until after the game started or ended#Totally understand that - and it's still really fun to speculate how they'd react! Very enjoyable!#But others - like the above - I'm just like But they existed before the game and are such fun characters! Why!#Neverminding that Osmosis Jones was yet another box office flop in an impressive lineup of likewise siblings oof lol#It'd be such a good movie......if only (lol) Like I love it! But yeah it's still pretty rough haha#Gosh if the animated sections aren't beautiful tho hh <3#The show's even rougher - like why choose a nearly PG-13 movie to turn into a Y-10 (at the Most) cartoon? The tone shift is so jarring lol#So yeah! Why weren't these characters a more popular draw five years later! That's practically still pop culture! Lolol#No I'm well aware I'm probably The entire pool of people interested in this crossover but hey - I offer >:3c#Obviously I had to have Ozzy judging me for subjecting him to the Institute - this is what you get for being a fave Oz <3#Thrax is All over him (a criminal) and Ozzy (a cop) being equalized in the same prison uniform lol - I mean yes but actually no#It's an escape game of course he wants out#I have way too much fun making ''real person'' profiles wagh I've already made a bunch of backstory stuff helpppp#The names are pulled around from the various voice actors/real names based on character names which was Quite fun#And of course Oz had to get punched :) That meme's not completely dead yet is it lol#But really it was just fun posing ahhh I'm really rather pleased with it <3 Excited to scene-stitch that one together too#Drix fussing over Oz is my favourite ahhhh yesss <3 <3#Can you tell that hunched-over Thrax was my first pass? Here's a hint - he doesn't have a burned finger there!#I wrote up his profile after that one and forgot to add it afterwards haha but yeah! Just barely touched on in-fic so far lol#And then him in his proper clothes.... Look all I'm saying is that I was uniquely primed in my media diet to enjoy Vargas lol
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Just saw this comment on a story posted a month ago.
*cries in Eddie Munson Solo Series no one wanted to read, interact with or request for*
No shade to the person that commented this on their own fic if you recognize it. It's not their fault. I'm not mad at them. More crying in the tags.
#and no I didn't tag the solo series like I normally would because it's not about THAT. It's not about trying to get people to read it#It was just really ouchie to see the same concept I wrote 2 years ago get triple the notes in ONE MONTH.#and double the notes of my solo series masterlist in general in one month vs 2 years of my stories sitting there rotting#Then I see people saying they need more solo Eddie and I'm just here like my dudes I begged for requests. BEGGED. But bc I wasn't#/have never been a popular writer people don't want it from ME. It's like omg we want THIS but not like that. Not from you.#Can't help but let it get you down when nothing has changed in 2 years. It's not like I worked my way up and have the interaction now#that every other blog I used to commiserate with back in the day is getting currently. Fandom isn't a competition but it's not fair either#and I really struggle with that a lot of the time#Also yes I will concede I should be happy with the notes on the solo series because they are the highest of all the work on my page but#they're still nothing compared to what some people have just hours after posting a new story.#I saw someone complaining the other day that there are less new stories in the fandom than ever 1. That's simply not true. 2. Even if it wa#can you blame writers for giving up when readers are checking the same popular blogs over again or reading the same 5 tropes the same#2 pairings over and over. The same series? Over and over. Ignoring everything else and then complaining that their faves don't post enough?#That the popular writer with the incredible series (that rightfully deserves interaction) hasn't posted a new dad!eddie or rockstar!eddie#drabble in ages meanwhile there are writes out there pouring their souls into dad!eddie and no one reads it. There is so much rockstar Eddi#smut out there that it could sustain a brand new reader for an entire year before they needed a new fic#Idk man. I'm just feeling so defeated. I write for fun now. But there was a point in time where I desperately tried to build a platform by#offering requests and writing a lot of things I would not otherwise write to try and gain traction on my page and every time I see another#food fucking fic get hundreds of notes I get so sad that I wrote that stupid Melon fic because I had people in my life that told me#they would be excited to read it and for what? One of them still talks to me. The others moved on so fast. Most didn't even reblog it.#Some of them have since written their own food fucking fics that got triple the notes of my OG. Again. No shade to them. I don't own the#concept. It's just disheartening and fucking sad above all else. How hard I tried to get people to LIKE me and my stories. 😂#Just sad hours in general tonight my guys. Going to go and pour the bad feelings into Aftermath and then maybe make a bad life choice and#pour all my savings into an ipad#YES I KNOW first world problems. I know. That's why I try not to talk about it bc it seems so petty considering the state of the world#But you can't help what gets you down#EMMs Journal#EMM's Journal
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a large amount of time I've been spending on -untitled undefined scope original fiction project- since the last time I posted about it has been trying to develop the protagonist concept I came up with last summer or whatever into like, a character that would feel real and era appropriate.
it's fun research to do. naturally a lot of the details I assigned to her are things that I already think are cool, so it's been a lot of fun trying to trace her traits back through the relatively recent past, getting reminded of how much things have changed, or where the gaps in my intuition are, and then doing a flurry of reading to get a sense for exactly how someone like her and the people around her could have happened and what her life was probably like leading up to her present day. hopefully this results in some good good verisimilitude.
#I wrote a short story from her perspective over the holidays and then didn't know how to continue it#and then I got distracted by real life stuff for a few months#I forget if I posted about that#and then I've been picking through archive dot org for the last few weeks looking at this stuff#the last big rabbit hole was trying to get a better feel for era appropriate ts/tv subculture#the current one I'm looking at is how she would've gotten into language learning and how that would've worked#nettle has been prodding me about the setting thing lately so I've been thinking about that more too#probably the biggest hurdle by far is figuring out how I want to play that#and how I want the thing to be divided up#since the original coc scenario I'm developing this out of is centered on a flight from LA to honolulu#and the airport dungeon was definitely meant to be a hook for a larger campaign#some amount of it is going to cover protag lady's failed life in LA and some of it is going to be worse things happening in hawaii#but it's like. how much do I want to balance it one way or the other#and realistically how much does the aesthetics of 20th century air travel add to the story#besides me personally thinking it's compelling ofc#a lot of what I find compelling about hawaii is that it's an east/west cultural crossroads and realistically that's also true of socal#and I can wax poetic about socal as much as I want without worrying all that much about mishandling something#and there's also a lot of socal specific history along similar parallels to pull from that I'm more familiar with#I guess it comes down to whether curiosity re: 'doing it right' is enough of a motivator to do the increased amount of research#which I guess it has so far with the above character details. so hopefully that will continue#but it also feels like using machine translation a bit yknow. it's hard to know how effectively I'll be able to sanity check#although depending on where this goes I might be able to get other people involved to sensitivity read down the line#with most of the creative things I do I just have a tendency to always rely really heavily on figuring things out myself#I also want protag lady to have a Cool Car and idk how to get that from point a to point b narratively#this is like an entire second or third post's worth of tags but I don't feel like unfucking this so whatever. suffer. I guess.
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played the game ok boomer at my family party today, ended up explaining to a room of ~20 of my relatives what fanfiction is so they could understand the question, “in fanfiction, what does AU stand for?”. and then the card’s definition of “AU” was wrong so i also had to get into the concept of “canon”.
can u believe. in front of my whole family. a room full of people, aged 3 to 80. all staring at me intently as i explain the difference between an alternate universe and canon divergence. at one point my mom was like “daina i think we get it” and a cousin and two aunts were like “wait no we’re interested please continue” and i had to say to my own mother in front of god and my i am kenough sweatshirt “sorry but unlike you the rest of them DON’T have to listen to me talk about fanfiction on the regular”. my uncle is a retired judge. my one cousin worked for the federal government in a job that was so classified that for years he literally couldn’t legally tell us about ANYTHING he was working on. and today those men sat and patiently listened to me define “coffee shop AU”.
also, not one, not two, but THREE of the answers for the young folks, i knew solely because they were either plot points on stranger things or they were things i found out whilst reading stranger things fanfics. and then i was the only person in our age bracket (10 people, ranging from ages 9 to 42) that knew who anne rice was, and had to explain yet again that the reason i had this knowledge was because… fanfic.
it was surreal. also my aunt, aged 68, may or may not begin attempting to read fanfic now because, according to her, “there are so many stories where there are these small side characters and i’d just KILL to hear their backstory or like what was going through their minds during the main action!” i’m very happy for her. today was wild.
#d speaks#the things i knew because of stranger things: who ripped a bats head off on stage. what year the challenger exploded. the ghostbusters theme#in case ur curious the way the game worked is there was a set of questions for people born pre 1980 and a set of questions for people born#post 1980 and you split into the two teams and you take turns reading trivia questions to each other#the questions for the young ppl were things like above - who wrote interview w a vampire#what year did the challenger explode. who are the fab four. true or false elvis had a twin.#the questions for the old people were like: what does BAE stand for. in fanfiction what’s an AU. who won the first american idol.#it was a weird game but very educational#and funny to play with my little cousins because as i said anywhere from 2-4 of them are gen alpha depending on how u define it#so it was very interesting to see what sorts of things have been passed down culturally and what sorts of things stayed solely in their time#it was sort of reminiscent of are you smarter than a fifth grader in some ways#also no one asked but. the teams were:#old team: 4 solid boomers. 3 boomer/gen x cuspers. 3 gen x’ers.#young team: 2 xennial cusps. 2 millennials. 1 zillennial cusp. 1 zoomer. 2 zalpha cusp. 2 gen alphas#and then also our 3 year old cousin who technically is gen alpha but he was more moral support than anything you understand#though at one point he DID declare that he wanted to play - picked up a card and ‘read’:#‘santa comes he eats the milk and cookies. poop goes in the potty’ in the EXACT cadence of someone asking a trivia question lmfao#love that kid. he also told me a few knock knock jokes#mainly they were like. knock knock. who’s there. candy cane. candy cane who. candy cane on your head!!!!!!!!#a true comedic genius that boy
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good morning!! <33
#now my lowest exploration is 49% :3#so they're all roughly fifty percent or above now#which means i'm halfway done overall hehe#there are a lot of underground segments though#but i'll finish what i can above ground today and save those for like tomorrow + other days#anyways i wanna write again it's been a bit#like zayne's thing was the last i wrote so lol#i did manage to level four of my hsr charas up and I'm now farming relics for feixiao :3#so that's fun ^^#anyways~ i hope today/tomorrow is kind to you!! <333#morning rambles
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can’t joker out take a hint? bojan was/is sick. žare seems to be sick. i am (sympathy?) sick. come on. get out of the studio. get some rest in time for božič. jesus christ.
#i am joking and yet i am not#i am writing this at three am in the morning because i am as mentioned above sick#can’t sleep for my fucking clogged-up nose#don’t think this is what alex turner meant when he said ‘now it’s three in the morning and i’m tryna change your mind’#how can you tell i am sick? i wrote ‘three am in the morning’#healthy me would never do a tautology like that#joker out#bojan cvjetićanin#žare pak
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wip saturday
so! i got tagged by @alchemistc on wednesday (which is basically today when you think about it!!!) but the only thing i've worked on this week is a bucktommy-adult-film-stars-blind-date!AU, of which 6k came to me in a fit of inspiration in the middle of the night.
it currently sits at almost 11k and it's clearly me biting off more than i can chew and it may never actually see the light of day and i don't know what to say for myself except a lot of anxious yelling!!!!
Tommy has had a lot of sex with women on camera. In trying to clear what he sees as the red in his ledger, he’s fucked a handful of women just because Howie asked. But the numbers from before, from his time at a pre-reformation Station 118, feel like they far outweigh anything he’s done since, like he's still carrying them somehow. Vaguely, he hears footsteps and the muffled sound of Howie’s voice. The curtain wiggles. As he sits on the stool, curtain pulled to hide him and large headphones tucked over his ears to keep from spoiling the identity of his scene partner before the cameras start rolling, Tommy squeezes the narrow pill container in his pocket. It had been a relief to get away from this aspect of the performance. At this point in his career, Tommy is considered an old pro. He can do what’s needed. It’s just a little tedious. By the time he notices Howie has snuck into the closet in front of him, the camera is already rolling and he’s being directed to take off his headphones by a coordinator with a finger to his lips. Silently, Tommy does as he’s told. A soft rustle of clothing indicates his counterpart on the other side of the curtain has done the same. The bustle of the house has faded into quiet in the interim, and Tommy hears the soft click of his lips separating. “Alright,” Howie says with a smile. “Let’s get you two acquainted.” Tommy hands the headphones off to the first person that reaches for them and rolls his neck. As an assistant steps forward to drag the divider out of the way, he takes a deep breath. He’s not bad with people, generally, so this part will be easy. It’ll be the part after that’s a little bit of a grind—no pun intended. But when he looks at who’s waiting on the other side of the curtain, the breath rushes out of him again. Any of them, Hen had said, pointedly, twice, and he still never considered the possibilities inherent in any.
...is this anything?
#it's Too Much is what it is 😭😭😭#i'm clearly trying to punch above my weight with this one#but The Great Tommy Schism seems to be hitting fandom particularly hard these last few days#so i'm mustering up the courage to put part of an ADULT FILM STAR AU THAT I WROTE IN A FUGUE STATE (????) out into the world#to try to spark a little joy for anyone that might be intrigued by this premise#buck x tommy
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this barbie is a star! trek!
~
long list of fun description ideas below
(anyone can make these if they want. credit’s nice but optional lol)
sisko - this barbie is literally moses
rom - this barbie is a communist
odo - this barbie sleeps in a bucket
bashir - this barbie is unnatural, meaning 'not from nature.’ 'freak' or 'monster' would also be acceptable
bashir - this barbie would like to borrow a cup of goo
garashir - this barbie has a homoerotic combination book-and-debate club
jiles/o’bashir - this barbie is just saying you might like him a bit more than your wife
kira - this barbie is a terrorist
kiradax - this barbie deserved more lesbian screentime
quark - this barbie knows all 285 rules of acquisition
aos kirk - this barbie has 73 problems and 72 of them are torpedoes
spock - this barbie wouldn't know what to do with a genuine, warm, decent feeling (but is worried about jim too)
spock - this barbie is, and always will be, yours
spirk - this barbie was the foundation of modern fandom/shipping
scotty - this barbie cannae take any more, captain, she's gonna blow
scotty - this barbie never actually said he’ll beam you up
chekov - this barbie was invented in russia, as was everything else
picard - this barbie made it so
worf - this barbie looks good in a dress
riker - this ken was a captain of the klingon vessel pagh for ten seconds
data - this barbie is fully functional
q - this barbie is god
janeway - this barbie taught god manners
janeway - this barbie killed fear
paris - this barbie’s daddy issues turned him into a lizard
neelix - this barbie is the self-appointed chief morale officer
#star trek#benjamin sisko#spirk#elim garak#miles o'brien#jadzia dax#leonard 'bones' mccoy#hikaru sulu#nyota uhura#barbie selfie ai#i’d like to discuss the creation process for this bc it was ridiculously involved#the official(???) selfie meme generator is incorrectly formatted#so i covered up the ‘this barbie is’ bit above the names#then i couldn’t figure out what the font was#so i wrote out and screenshotted the entire alphabet lower and uppercase on the ai#copied and reoriented every single letter for both#and organized every single letter in every single word by hand#yes. the entire sisko monologue. i did not type literally anything#which is why i added a watermark bc these took me straight-up hours#also yes i know kirk is an admiral in tmp but 1. i forgot and 2. whATEVER he hated it anyway
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to that anon ( i just deleted your ask because i honestly couldn't bother answering it ) this is a scaramouche McDonald's 🧍🏻♀️ if you have beef with what i make and find it uncomfortable that i like a character that you don't like; i kindly request you to block me and move on.
i want to emphasize this here instead of the tags but i welcome criticism towards my writing. bad faith or not; i'll still hear you out. but to go out of your way to insult me because i love a character that you dislike / hate is just beyond unnecessary and honestly? also really stupid. dumb even.
i'm sure you're reading this, dear anon. i'll say it again — block me and move on. thank you for your time.
#all i said above is something i wrote down in my ‘heads up’ post as well. it's a shame that some just don't go through with reading the post#but it is what it is i guess#and yes; i am leaving this post untagged
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anyways i am feeling kinda brave today so im gonna share a potentially unpopular taylor swift hot take. when i was talking to my friend yesterday about ttpd i realised that i kinda have a similar problem with the anthology as i do with evermore.
like don't get me wrong, both have absolute gems (willow, tolerate it, long story short, gold rush and NBNC from evermore are great and i love the albatross, so high school, the prophecy black dog, manuscript etc) but i think both collections (bc anthology is not an album) suffer because they came out connected to a much superior more cohesive work, and both almost feel like rejects from the body of work that proceeded it.
#actually like i said to my beloved mutual “thanK you aIMee” kinda feels like she woke up one day and went “fuck you kim actually”#which i can kinda relate to in a way bc the amount of times i randomly go “fuck you”#but my mutual said if there were more songs about being screwed over by people that could be a storyline. but theres not. its just there#like its a great song but also i kinda went “we are covering this ground again”#if there were new developments in the relationship i could kinda understand it#like how she wrote innocent and then backtracked that with rep bc things happened#but idk the anthology just feels like scraps she deemed good enough for release but in my opinion needed editing#the stupid ass 1830s lyric highlights this bc i get what shes trying to say but she worded it so badly#that i kinda see why its being clowned on#also imgonnagetyouback... yehahahahah liv did it better. now it feels like a done concept. im shocked she included it#she knew it was coming come on#anyways the anthology while good kinda felt unfinished#she should have given it a few more months and polished it#bc holy hell at least folkmore felt polished#even though evermore is cohesively weaker#my friend who is a folkmore swiftie kinda also feels like this fyi so dont come at me screaming “burn 1989 rep midnights stan!”#burn me idc#and while im at it both are in my bottom three only right above debut#tldr: both collections are tied to another work thats just so much better and cohesive#this is just me saying i cant get into anthology hahaha#and i felt weird bc everyone liked it but when my friend a literal folklore girl said “no im not feeling it” i felt better#bc so many people were saying it was better and those swifties were going 'all of us' and i kinda went... no i prefer standard#i love taylor sm and i love og ttpd its currently no 5 but the anthology has issues and one of them is similar to why i rank evermore lowl#i just went off on a tangent about the issues with the anthology and its songwriting and lack of narrative#i will say so i win you all over i loved the evermore set at eras i thought it was so beautifully done#taylor swift#ttpd: anthology#evermore
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[Image ID: A screenshot of user redwinterroses (from Jan 27, 2022) tinted yellow to indicate that it is a screenshot and not a post on the dashboard. The screenshot reads: All I'm saying is, if a fic refers to characters by their physical attributes instead of their names or pronouns ("he smiled at the older" "the blonde laughed") when we know who the character is, and ESPECIALLY if the descriptions include "ravenette" or "cyanette" or other ridiculous words--
I'm clicking out of that fic so fast my Ao3 history won't even register I've been there. /.EndID]
I'm gonna use this as a launching point for something that really bugs me with regards to how people - especially folks on tumblr - talk about fanfiction and if something isn't "up to snuff" or to their tastes. This ranges anywhere from grammar and punctuation, to even judgement towards someone for their skill in writing and how they frame it on tumblr - such as word choice or dialogue tags (said and its variants). Plenty of other things that get torn into (like POV type like first, second, or third (usually its first getting dunked on, second if you're not a Homestuck); or even tropes) but that's a different discussion, and I'm focusing more on how people talk about things that are "subpar". There are many posts like this, but I want to use this one to talk more about it as it's the one I most recently found. We're going to talk about this attitude, critique vs criticism vs what tumblr thinks is good critique with regards to writers (regardless of skill level, but mostly beginner ones), so this will get a bit lengthy.
Let's get definitions out of the way so everyone is clear here. When I say critique, this is in reference to feedback given towards a thing (writing, art, etc.) with the intention of improving upon it. Critique has a narrow scope, but it often addresses subject, form, technical aspects (in writing, form and technicality are grammar/punctuation, style, and prose - the latter of which is what OP is digging into), and execution. Critique includes both negative and positive aspects because it's important for good critique. Critique isn't tearing into someone for the sake of it, because the point of critique is to improve upon these aspects and become more comfortable in your craft. To take critiques is a skill in its own, but so is giving critiques - the best advice is usually a "critique sandwich" in which you say something positive, point out something that can be improved upon (importantly: not saying negatively charged things), and then summarize in a positive tone. Critique is not an excuse to bully, and critique should always be consensual. Critique appears in classes, in the form of beta readers, asking others for advice, and so on and so forth. The person who made the thing must be open to critique for critique to be effective. If they are not looking for critique and you give it anyways, you're just an ass.
On the other hand, criticism - especially in this context - is broader than critique. It tends to have a more negative connotation of it, but to be critical of something isn't inherently to be negative to it. This is where you see your media criticism, dissection of trends, etc. This doesn't usually engage directly with the source of the criticism most often, it's usually supplementary. Again: broader than critique, but its space does not often overlap with the original thing. Important to note that criticism does not inherently mean that the critic hates the thing being criticized. Criticism is just being critical of a thing. To be critical is not inherently negative; it's just talking about something to a finer degree than casual consumption. It's not admonishment, it's often a way to start a discussion.
This is where people tend to balk at the idea of criticizing fan media because they conflate the two, but critique =/= criticism. Critique is more based in the craft itself (art, writing, etc.) while criticism is more about the broader impact of the thing made by the craft. While critiques do exist in criticisms, and critique can draw from criticism, they are not the same thing.
Examples:
Critique:
Your inking wasn't consistent, so the final print is splotchy. You need to improve on inking your block if you want your final image to look the way you intend it to
You added too much ink to the block and caused a lot of spillage, you need to find a balance between the two in order to get what you want
I like the gestural nature of your drawing, but I think that you would get a stronger composition if you pushed it further and focus on line weight
The alliteration is a really nice touch in your prose, but you fall back on it a lot. I think that the alliteration would be more effective in this moment if you limit it to that moment and change up how you write prose leading into it - maybe slowly increasing the repetition until you get to the three-beats?
Your prose is really strong, and I like what you've developed so far. What I think you need to work on is learning how you can control your technical flow with better punctuation usage, such as a better understanding of when to use commas or em-dashes.
You're using periods at the end of your dialogue that is followed by a tag. Unless there's nothing like "he said", then periods in dialogue must be a comma. Not "'Alright.' He responded.", but: "'Alright,' he responded.".
Criticism:
There is a common trend within fandom to take a female love interest from canon and find a way to shove her off to the side for the sake of m/m shipping. It's come in a variety of forms, but the most notable ones include villainizing, killing her off, or the modern lesbian best friend/wingman which overlaps with the other modern form, the mean lesbian adjacent to the m/m ship.
Despite all the advancements that have been made in terms of accessibility within video games, it almost seems like some games are more inaccessible than ever due to developers prioritizing a key experience rather than making sure it's playable for everyone. A good example of this would be the MMO, Final Fantasy XIV, and its late game raiding that features many fights with non-toggleable flashes that have induced seizures in players, or their lack of color contrast options for color blind players - forcing both groups to either suffer through the content, not raid, or seek out illegal mods if they play on pc. Console raiders have no such options, as the in game effects toggle doesn't apply to the worst offenders.
With these examples out of the way, look back at OP and how they've framed their "advice" (which they say is advice further down this thread - as with all others who jump in on the post with "advice") - does this look like critique or criticism?
This style of post - and how everyone jumped on it - are part of a really frustrating trend online, but especially on tumblr, where people make vague complaints about a kind of writer and use their vague posting to tear into them. At this point, most people understand that unwanted critique is bad, so they instead channel that need to critique in stuff like this. From here on, I'm going to call it ""advice"" - quotations and all.
This is not advice. It's not even good critique. This ""advice"" is taking a common mistake or habit of fanfic writers - most of whom are new to writing, are teenagers, or haven't been professionally trained in writing because so few people have that opportunity - and then tearing it to shreds. This is looking at a habit that fanfic authors learning how to write picked up from other authors learning how to write, and then declaring that if a writer uses it you will not engage with them whatsoever.
That's not advice. It's a vague threat through shaming people for doing stuff. The thread goes on to list actual advice, but most of it is the most bare bones writing tips that doesn't account for people experimenting with style. It's shame through nitpicking and expecting everything to be perfection.
Fanfiction is held to a really awful standard in which it must meet every single one of your needs as a reader, otherwise it's not worth your time. Between the lack of support on platforms like AO3 or FFNet, and then these mass shaming posts that tear into writers for having the audacity of making a mistake, is it any surprise a lot of fanfic writers give up? Why so many fanfics you like just go unfinished with no word from the author?
Tumblr is too comfortable with this idea that they get to sit here and tear into authors who may not be using perfect syntax or use goofy words like silverette. You are looking at someone stumbling their way through a hobby that is admittedly very hard and tearing into them behind their back. When people see these posts, their fist reaction isn't go go "oh thank you for the advice," it's to get self conscious about their own writing and if they do fit the bill, they're not likely to take your advice. They may just stop writing altogether.
What gets to me is that this ""advice"" - this shaming framed as tips from people who "Actually Know how to write" - is it's considered a more widely acceptable way of talking about fanfiction and fanfiction authors than actually supporting authors you like. It's more acceptable than passing around resources. It's more acceptable than actual criticism of harmful things in fandom (see: colonizer lan wangji, op of this thread has talked about it a fair amount) that the criticism of would then make spaces safer for the people impacted (in that case, address the anti-indigenous writing of a horrific fic in the MDZS fandom that was trying to romanticize the tactics used in the genocide of indigenous americans).
Tumblr users seem to know to not take unwanted critique to the comments of the author in question, yet they can't seem to keep their mouths shut; instead, they curate hundreds of posts with thousands of notes to shame authors who have committed the grave sin of using goofy words or having awkward prose - which I'm so sure that no of the people making these posts have ever made mistakes like these in their own writing </sarcasm>
This collective shaming of writing characteristic of people learning how to write or who aren't super familiar with English doesn't sit right with me. Especially since so much of it feels like a reflexive cringe for things that the person grew out of. Maybe something isn't your style, but maybe it works for someone else. Everyone complains about the repetition of "said", but there are some hard hitting stories that weaponize the repetition of "said" for effect. Consider OP: a very specific one that I use still is bluenette, in part because I am a brunette who dies his hair blue very frequently - thus, bluenette (brunette+his is not incorrect in usage for myself, check my pinned; brunet+she would also not be incorrect - so do not come nitpicking me). Bluenette sounds so much like brunette that it comes off as a pun, and in this case it is used intentionally for said pun and often as a joke somewhere in my writing or even just conversation. Is OP going to also apply this logic to people who refer to women as brunets or blonds, or men as brunettes or blondes? Sometimes stuff like this is someone trying to work out their style. Sometimes it's a genuine mistake. Sometimes it's someone doing this with the utmost intention of calling a character by their hair color as a sign of disrespect through denying them their name - you do not know why it's used, and to publicly shame people for a common mistake is not how you're going to get them to improve.
The way ""advice"" is delivered feels like reflexive cringe, like I said, but also like a gross misrepresentation of what criticism is. Criticism's goal is discussion and improvement. Posts like these are just a way to shame people who aren't as skilled as you expect them to be. Let me make this clear: you are reading fanfiction. Many people use fanfiction to learn how to write, and may not have the most polished style. You are reading this for free. It's frankly really shitty to nitpick at someone's writing style and skill and then put it on blast for thousands of people on tumblr to jump in on this dogpile. Even when you give advice - such as in this post down beyond this screen - it's still framed negatively and in a "do this or you're bad" kind of critique. This is not framed to actually help people with their writing; this is shaming them into the style that you like and find engaging. And every following post beyond the advice from OP in this example further dogpiles the original point.
If you are shaming someone through a vague post because you don't like the fact that they're not a skilled writer, then it's clear you do not actually care about these people improving. You would rather mass shame writers who don't fit your view of what technically flawless prose looks like - be it because they're a teenager, they learned writing from online spaces and are still learning, or English isn't their first language - than actually teach them in a way that would be conducive to learning. You would rather have people jump in on this mass shaming as a sense of self importance because none of you write that way, thus everyone else who does is bad.
This is not critique. This is not criticism.
This is shaming writers - specifically writers who are still learning - for the fact that they do not match your expectations, and then gloating about how you never want to touch their work ever again.
The example above is shaming a common writing habit of teenagers and new writers who learned independently, and then following that shame with a threat to never engage with their stuff again, and then some tips sprinkled in with more "if you do this, shame on you" language.
You know, the exact stuff that makes people quit writing as a hobby or trying to learn it because they want to join in when it concerns this aspect of fandom.
This kind of ""advice"" is just vague blogging a writer to shame them. They may not ever see it, but Tumblr sure does a good job of keeping people from ever attempting to write because of the unreasonably high standards for a new/inexperienced writer putting stuff on the internet.
#ao3#fanfiction#writing#fandom critical#writing advice#lbr its more like writing advice critical#but i loath to call something like that advice#original#long post#ive got a lot of feelings about this because of how rocky my start was with writing#most of my improvement was done offline due to the flack i was getting on deviantArt for frankly anything that I made#didn't matter if it was writing or drawing or mmd stuff. people took their opinions directly to you#add on tumblr's brand of ''''advice'''' and you get a nervous wreck who's struggling to post fanfiction#i'm only where i'm at because of how much i wrote away from people which is also why posts like the one above dont get me down about writin#but thats because i'm at where i'm at. i'm not a new writer ive been doing this for over a decade#i also know that my younger sister raced to ''get good'' at writing because of the shit that i'd gotten#i had a rocky phase with my writing that she didn't because she was actively trying to avoid the vulnerable phase that OP is dunking on#yeah when you're still getting on your feet with writing you do pick up stuff like that from other awkward people#they're all looking to each other for examples and it's not helpful to fucking shame people for it#what happened to cringe is dead oh wait. that only applies to what you like. and not what affects you.#when people go ''why do my favorite fics die'' and ''why arent there many writers'' its because of shit like this#shaming people for growing pains is embarrassing behavior#especially when you follow up that shame with a threat to never engage with them#im glad i got batshit about my writing and stopped caring about other people's opinions. new writers can't say the same.#also i hate the gendering of brunet/brunette blond/blonde its so fucking DUMB
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