#about to be my family

[bookslutskye]

so i recently got top surgery and this was on my discharge papers after a mild complication

[crow-caller]

as a child there's nothing cooler than a kid who gets subjected to evil experiments and gains special abilities. it's even cooler if these abilities also cause unfathomable suffering to use/against others. children love stories like this.

[tigerjpg]

nothing makes me go "ooooh we are NOT the same" quite like reading some post about how people talk with their parents about their interests. what do you mean you told your father about stevebucky. what do you mean he asked further questions

[goaheadandgetinthebog]

Several videos (independently) start circulating on the internet of the Waynes info dumping.

Bruce - the role of railways in westward expansion in the 1890s

Dick - clown eggs

Jason - tb and the New England vampires of the late 19th century, with reference to vampire literature

Cass - Paris sewer system

Tim - comparison of different camera lenses from different manufacturers, with model numbers

Duke - anti homeless architecture and how to remove it

Damian - cat declawing

After all this, a new meme forms.

'You must be this autistic to get adopted by Bruce Wayne.'

[valtsv]

are we still doing this because i have a late submission

[proud-borimex]

This is gonna be my family and I in June😭😭🤣🤣

[stargirl230]

thanks for the light

I was just trying to figure out how procreate works but then the op brainworms got to me and 35 hours later here we are! can you tell I miss home-cooked meals :')

(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)

[transassdemon]

[My art, don't steal, tag if reposting]

[asteraws]

chilchunk san

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

Brucie Wayne gets into a mild accident in public (read-got hit by a car). And Batman would just walk it off (“it’s barely a bruise”), but Brucie obviously… can’t.

So he has to suffer the ordeal of having civilians call paramedics, getting fussed over, and having-

Having his dead son get into the back of the ambulance with him.

Oh- oh no. He must have hit his head worse than he thought. He thought he was past this…

[framblebee]

INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE 1x2 | 1x3 | 1x4

[1alchemistart]

dont got much to offer for The Holiday but have these sillies!

happy valentines day :D

[inkskinned]

probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.

we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."

at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.

the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.

the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.

what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.

here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.

[aerequets]

sorry

-

it gets progressively messier the sleepier i get, but i feel like it fits the vibe!

[spineless-lobster]

Hey so if you guys here any pained animalistic sobs and/or wails don’t mind that it’s only me thinking about the house of hades family portraits

[jewishvitya]

"Those people believe x. We know they're wrong because y, but here's how they got to this point."

"So you think x!"

"No, I'm explaining what they think."

"You're making excuses for it and arguments that support it!"

"I'm laying out the arguments they give. I'm not making them, I'm showing them. I broke down why it's wrong and how it became a prevalent view."

"You're an x-apologist!"

Right, sorry, my mistake. Those people don't have a distorted worldview that leads them to cruelty, they're just evil by nature, their essence is darkness and violence, there's no humanity in them, go ahead and fantasize about wiping out whatever population you marked as bad. Didn't mean to interrupt your fantasy. I can see you're quite attached to it. Go on, advocate for whatever useless violence you think should happen in retaliation. I thought violence should be a horrible but sometimes-necessary tool, but it can be a goal, that's fine too. Everyone needs a dream I guess.