#a very very good star wars name
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Mand'alor and Fett
also a plain color and lineart version
(seriously every generation with a named Fett features at least one of them being the Mand'alor's best friend or family)
#star wars#mandalorians#the mandalorian#kotor#old republic#mandalore#mandalore the ultimate#cassus fett#shae vizla#mandalore the avenger#khomo fett#jaster mereel#jango fett#din djarin#boba fett#what should dins epithet be#hmm...#mandalore the reluctant#lol#behold the product of trying out a sort-of-painting style#i really like how boba turned out#and also ultimates mask#wow bobas armor is almsot identical to jangos green one#i think vorten is the only named fett who doesnt come with a mandalore and thats only bc theres two named ones in that generation#you can really see the evolution of helmet styles#mask -> neocrusader -> Chunky -> beginnings of stylization -> wide -> classic -> narrow#the visors get narrower every generation huh#also shae had a very good idea with that gorget. too bad jango didnt have one#oh well at least boba has his giant scarf
484 notes
·
View notes
Text
The boy stops in his tracks. “I know you,” he says, tilting his head curiously. He’s not tall, but he’s regal nonetheless, dressed all in white. Something about him makes Leia’s hair stand on end, and although she hides it she feels a stirring in her own chest. I know you like I know my own soul, she thinks wildly, and wonders where it came from. Has she gone insane?
“That’s nice,” she says, and shoots him anyway.
He deflects it in a flash of light, a glowing blue laser sword appearing in his hand like magic. She’s only seen one of those before, and it’s Vader’s. If this boy is anything like Vader, she realizes, she’s in deep shit.
She’s smart enough to know when she’s outmatched. Leia makes the tactical decision to run for her life.
Later, as she’s getting the hell out of there, she wonders why he didn’t try to stop her.
She remembers being young and tugging on her mothers skirts, demanding to know why their guest was so sad. “Does he not like it here?” She’d asked, and then, trembling, because Kenobi always seemed saddest around her. “Is it…because of me?”
“Oh, Leia,” her mother sighed, lifting her into her arms. “It’s not that, I promise.”
“Then what is it?”
“Master Kenobi lost a child under his care, years ago.��� Breha’s eyes grew deeper, darker. “It was not his fault, but he blames himself. You remind him of that child, that’s all.”
Leia had quieted at that, contemplative.
The next time she’d seen Master Kenobi, she had given him a hug. He didn’t seem to know what to do with that, so she resolved to give him more of them. “He’s lonely,” she’d told her mother. “No one should be lonely.”
Looking at Obi-Wan Kenobi now, the memory seemed so far away. He’d aged thirty years in the ten it had been.
He looks, Leia thinks with a small twinge of regret, very lonely.
“Leia,” he greets. “It’s been a long time.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Leia sees a glint of white.
Kenobi freezes in his tracks. “Luke?” He whispers, and through the distance Leia can hear it as if he’d been speaking directly into her ear.
Master Kenobi lost a child under his care, her mother whispers in her head. He blames himself.
In an instant, Leia understands everything.
Kenobi is still staring at the boy he’d lost so long ago when Vader cuts him down.
Later, as she’s pacing around on the Falcon to Han muttering darkly about Princesses and supernatural abilities, she rememberers the way the boy collapsed, as if all his strings had been cut. Vader was too occupied with him to even look at her as she shot at him desperately.
Luke. She hates him more than she hates herself.
“They know where you are,” he hisses frantically. “They’re coming for you. You have to run.”
“Wait!” Leia quickly pulls up their sonar. Nothing yet, but it would explain the distant queasiness she’d felt since they’d landed. She tended to trust her gut. “How do you know? How much time do we have?”
“Not important, and not enough,” he says. “I have to go, and so do you. You need to leave yesterday.”
“How do I know I can trust you? I don’t even know who you are.”
He pauses. “Call me Skywalker.”
“That’s not an answer, Skywalker.”
“Yes it is.”
She opens her mouth to argue, but there are faint voices on the other end, drawing nearer.
“Shit,” Skywalker mutters. “I have to go. I’ll be in contact, okay? Don’t ever tell me where you are, or where you’re heading. Vader and Palpatine aren’t shy about reading minds. Just leave as soon as you can, and figure out the rest.”
“But—“
It’s too late. The comm has disconnected.
She stares down at it, disbelieving. How would the Empire know they’re here? Why should she trust a stranger who somehow got her personal comm code?
Gut feeling or not, on paper this was a perfect location. Supplied, armored, and most importantly, extremely well hidden. There was no real reason to think it would possibly be found out.
It’s probably a trap. Almost definitely a trap.
Han sticks his head in the door, a sour look on his face. “Hey Princess, can you tell these idiots—“
She makes a decision then and there.
“We’re leaving.”
“What?”
“We’re evacuating, effective immediately.” She pushes past him, and he follows so close he’s nearly stepping on her heel.
“Why? I think it’s pretty cozy here. Actual sunlight doesn’t hurt, either.”
“Apparently too cozy.” She grabs the first person she sees, a pilot who stares at her with wide eyes. “Emergency evacuation. Spread the word to pack everything you can and leave, I’ll let you know where we’re headed when we’re in orbit.”
He salutes and scurries off.
“Woah, hey now.” Han snatches at her elbow until she turns around to face him. “What’s going on?”
“There’s a new informant. He told me the Empire knows we’re here. They’re coming for us.”
“And you trust this person because…”
“I don’t have a choice,” she snaps. Someone runs past them, holding three packs filled to the brim with rations. “It’s either he’s lying and we’re not in danger, or he’s telling the truth and we’re going to die if we don’t listen. It’s not exactly hard math.”
It could be a trap of course, but he hadn’t suggested any sort of direction or destination to follow, and Leia wasn’t inclined to share. Especially not after his tidbit about Vader and Palpatine reading minds.
He squints at her. “That’s not it.”
“What?”
“I don’t believe you,” he insists. He’s so infuriating. Leia doesn’t know why she hasn’t kicked him out yet.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yes you do, and you’re either gonna tell me why, or find a different transport when we head out of here.”
“Who said I was riding on your hunk of junk?” She demands. She actually was planning on going with them, since the Falcon has more than enough room for all the supplies that can’t fit in the other ships and none of the trustworthiness of the other pilots, but Han doesn’t need to know that.
“Well?”
Damn him. Damn him for knowing how to read her. She doesn’t know when she let that happen.
“I feel it,” she admits, defeated. “Something tells me he’s trustworthy. We’ll wait and see if it’s right.”
He studies her. She holds her head high, but inside she’s jittery at the scrutiny. They don’t have time for this.
“Yeah, all right,” Han finally says.
“Really?”
“Yes, really.” He rolls his eyes, like she’s not acting absolutely insane by putting all her trust in a random man she’s never even met. “Now come on, Princess, weren’t you the one who said we had to hurry?”
What is it about this man that makes it impossible to tell whether she wants to punch him or drag him into the nearest supply closet? They don’t have time to find out.
“So there’s good news and bad news.”
“Bad news first,” she demands.
“They know there’s a mole.”
“Shit.” Of course they know, how could they not? She should have been more careful, less obvious about the correlation of their movements with the Empire’s plans. “The good news?”
“They’ve tasked me with hunting down this ‘pathetic rebel spy,’” Skywalker says, humor in his voice. “That should buy me some time.”
Leia can’t quite stop the snort she lets out. “Seriously?”
“Yep. You’re speaking to a professional mole-hunter, here.”
“Well congratulations on the promotion, Skywalker.”
“Thank you,” he says grandly. Then, quieter, “It won’t last, Princess. They’ll find out eventually.”
“I know. Just hang in there, it will be over soon.”
“Will it?” He asks, suddenly sounding very young. She realizes that she has no idea how old he is. She doesn’t know anything about the man who has saved them more times than she cared to admit, and the idea rattles her until they sign off.
Later, she looks up the name Skywalker in their archives. There are a few results, but only one sticks out.
Anakin Skywalker, Jedi Knight and hero of the Clone Wars. Killed at the hands of Darth Vader. There are gossip articles too, speculations on his relationship with the pregnant Senator Padmé Amidala, who died around the same time Skywalker did. The baby, it seems, died with her.
Unless he didn’t.
It’s ridiculous. It’s impossible. The idea is so ludicrous that Leia almost rejects it entirely.
But it makes sense. By the Maker, it makes sense.
The child of Anakin Skywalker, it seems, would be a powerful Force user indeed. Powerful enough for Kenobi to take the baby and run. Powerful enough for the Emperor to want him for his own gain. Powerful enough to send Vader after Kenobi and take the boy himself.
Maybe even powerful enough to shield his mind from Vader and Palpatine’s intrusions.
Powerful enough to hide the fact that he’s a spy.
Leia sinks into her chair, covering her face as she laughs.
Maybe Luke isn’t so bad after all.
“No, no, no,” she mutters, digging through the smoking wreckage of the TIE fighter. “Don’t be dead, please don’t be dead.”
“Princess…” Han lays a hand on her shoulder that she immediately shrugs off.
“No, he’s not dead. He’s not. Luke!”
A faint cough answers her, and she’s so relieved to hear it she could cry. Behind her, Han starts bellowing for a medic and, “Some damn help here, do you expect us to move all this ourselves?”
“Luke, it’s me,” she sobs. “It’s Leia. You’re at the Rebel Base. You’re safe.”
More coughing, and there’s a worrying rasp to his voice when he says, “You know…my name?”
“I figured it out.”
“Smart.” This time, the coughing is so bad Leia and Han both wince.
“Shit, kid,” Han says, moving another piece of rubble. “Don’t talk. We’re gonna get you out of here, all right?”
“Stand back,” Luke chokes out.
“What?”
“Stand back. Please.”
Han protests, but something in Leia knows they should listen to him. She drags him back, and motions everyone else to fall back with them. They do, albeit reluctantly.
“Clear,” she calls, hoping Luke can hear her.
The TIE explodes.
“Fuck!” Han goes back in, Leia on his heels with the terrifying feeling that she’d just allowed Luke to die, before they both stop in their tracks. Around them, the broken pieces of the TIE are floating.
And curled up in the middle is a man dressed all in white.
“Luke!” She pushes past Han to start dragging him out, and after another moment of staring around them, he helps her.
As soon as they get clear, the pieces fall to the ground with a clatter. Luke falls limp with them.
Han is still looking at the TIE. “Can you do that?” He asks quietly.
Leia pauses her examination of the unconscious man in front of her to glare at him. “Is that what you’re most concerned with right now? Really?”
“Excuse me for asking, Princess!”
“It’s white,” Luke grumbles, pulling at his hospital gown bitterly. “I hate wearing white.”
“Should I be offended?”
He rolls his eyes. “Don’t even. You look great and you know it. I just feel like I never left.”
“Well,” she says gingerly. “I guess it’s a good thing you got sick of it. If we went around in matching outfits all the time, people might think we’re twins.”
He snorts. “Yeah, right.”
#star wars#star wars fanfiction#luke skywalker#han solo#leia organa#imperial luke skywalker#exactly when luke was taken by the empire is totally up to speculation it could honestly be anywhere from newborn to 5#as for why luke has his dad’s blue lightsaber here instead of like a red one or smth- well you see your honor I thought it would be a slay#but also when you think about it for more than 5 seconds you’re like actually yeah that’s sick and twisted of palpatine and vader actually#you’re carrying your fathers most treasured weapon#you don’t know your father once fought the rise of the very empire you stand to inherit with that blade. you don’t know who he defended#you don’t know your father brought about the end of the republic with that same weapon#he killed the younglings with it. he fought his closest companion with it#you’re carrying what was once your fathers most treasured weapon. you are your fathers most treasured weapon#just as your father is a weapon now#also I didn’t make it clear but obi-wan has his ‘strike me down and I become stronger’ moment like he still dies on purpose to cause proble#but when he saw luke he couldn’t look away. he had to see him with living eyes one last time#can u tell I had So Many Thoughts on everyone else’s perspective in this fic too#han is having a constant crisis in the background because 1) force is real 2) princess is annoying AND pretty which sucks for him#in particular and 3) pretty princess is learning to use the force and is hot while doing it. Chewie is laughing at him. life is hell#good lord did not mean to put an entire essay in the tags. i love their super special twin powers (cosmic entity that binds their souls)#edit: GUYS I FORGOT TO NAME THE FUCKING AU#AND WHEN I TRY AND FIX IT IT GLITCHES OUT ON MEEE 😭😭😭
219 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hi!! Okay, so your dinluke art is the jumping off point for my interest in the pairing. I love how you draw them and always get so excited when it comes up in my timeline! Do you have some top favourite fics that you would recommend?
Hi!! Ahhhh that makes me happy that you’ve been intrigued by the dinluke! It was such a random pairing when i first saw it start popping up and i thought, let me just quick browse through the ao3 tags for fun and yeah… deep dived down that rabbit hole. I was hooked pretty quickly LOL There’s sooo many good fics and writers out there for the ship! You should definitely give the ao3 tag a browse. Not sure what preferences you have but as always, check the tags!
These are some of the first ones that pop into my head (these authors have other works for the pair you can check out too!)
Separate Ways and Worlds Apart by PepperPrints on ao3 (I think Separate Ways was one of the first dinluke fics I read and probably what made me fall in love with them so fast.)
I see you have a sword (I have one too) by lelex on ao3 (love the coparenting and saber training/sparring)
i give to you by @treescape on ao3 and tumblr (I’m currently making my way through their dinluke fics, they’re so cute and sweet 🧡)
His Beacon, His Harbor by annathaema (moony) on ao3 (also one of the first dinluke fics i read!)
If anyone has any recs for the ship, feel free to add them as well!! even i could use some more haha
#theres so many good dinluke artists out there too! they also made me fall in love with the ship#there’s also very good spicy ones too if you’re into that#dinluke#dinluke fic recs#Star Wars#the mandalorian#din djarin#luke skywalker#fic recs#hopefully I got everyone’s names right 😅
94 notes
·
View notes
Text
happy pride month to queer high republic authors!!
Cavan Scott (he/him/they/them) - author of The Rising Storm, Path of Vengeance, The High Republic comic, The Monster of Temple Peak, Saber for Hire, Tempest Runner
Justina Ireland (she/they) - author of A Test of Courage, Out of the Shadows, Mission to Disaster, co-author of The Edge of Balance Vol. 1, Path of Deceit and Defy the Storm
Tessa Gratton (she/he/they) - author of Quest for Planet X, Temptation of the Force, co-author of Path of Deceit and Defy the Storm
Alyssa Wong (they/them) - co-author of Escape from Valo, author of short story Rogue Element
Vita Ayala (they/them) - co-author of Galactic Bake-Off Spectacular
#in order of their involvement with the series#the high republic#thr#almost started typing djo's name and went to double check and he's just a very cool ally actually. good for him#thank you star wars writers with pronouns
60 notes
·
View notes
Text
The great Madam Herta has decided to WHAT
#RESURRECT THE PERSON WHO STARTED A COSMIC WAR????????#MY GOD WOMAN I KNOW YOU'RE MORALLY GRAY BUT WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS????#Do you think eventually - according to the main story - we'll gather enough of the Scepter to actually bring Rubert II back..?#do you think they'd actually incorporate that into a future update a year from now or something?#because that would be. insane.#I pay a very.. very surface level amount of attention to Gold and Gears so I don't know much about the guy or the Second Emperor's War#but if a single guy's got an entire WAR NAMED AFTER HIM?#can't be good news .#maybe Herta and Ruan Mei really ARE just that similar;;;#Honkai: Star Rail#Honkai Star Rail#HSR#blazingshitpost#blazingshitpost star rail edition#Herta#HSR Herta#Honkai Star Rail Herta
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
Quick question, is Watto still alive on Tattooine?? I checked the wiki but I'm looking for gut feeling here. My gut says no (or Luke never made it to that particular village)
But also I see a scenario where desperate Mado/BobF writers bring back Watto to annoy Semi-Crime Lord Boba Fett
#Skywalker eH?? *strokes 5 gray chin hairs* I knew a child slave of that same name. Oh he's your father? very good#let me tell you about generation debt#Star Wars#Watto#polls#tumblr polls
19 notes
·
View notes
Text
OK. Please, hear me out. What do you get when you take one heartbroken, middle-aged man and put him with another heartbroken, middle-aged man? Hint: Only good things.
I'm sorry, I'm not bored or tired of writing Ikkotah and Chekkatah (far from it, I have four WIPs outstanding more for them how do I stop??), but I do also want to write Ikkotah as he is in HFW. He deserves it. The man is a sad widower and needs to not be sad anymore. He also needs to be included in Aloy's troupe of people to fight Nemesis. I can dream.
Though he was still grieving Ourea, Aratak came to fight at the Battle of the Alight in HZD, so it's my belief dream that he'd also come for the fight against Nemesis. So Aloy would introduce them (maybe she's dabbling in matchmaking...) and they would both be impressed by the other's battle prowess and strength, and can connect over the loss of a dear loved one by tragic, heartbreaking circumstances.
Now. My soft shipper's heart requires Ikkotah to have a second chance at love, and Aratak needs someone nice and caring, but who could also kick his ass if needed. I think they'd be a good match! Both are super tough, good fighters, very handsome, and from mountain environments. But the cultural differences! They would have to learn each others' ways, hear each others' stories/songs, and then absolutely fall head-over-heels in love.
I'm sorry, I could not hold this in any longer. It needed to come out of my head. It's been eating me alive for days now. My poor Ikkotah has gotten an even rarer pair than Chekkatah. But it can't be helped. I've been snagged. They look nice next to each other too. Right? Am I crazy? I might be crazy. And with this, I have another story to add to my queue. Anyone up for a pre-end-of-the-world-battle meet-cute?
#it was rhetorical question#horizon forbidden west#horizon frozen wilds#Ikkotah#Aratak#If I could raise Chekkatah from the dead#I wouldn't be in this hell of trying to find Ikkotah someone new to be with#But Ikkotah/Aratak seems very nice#They're very good-looking next to each other#Ikkatak as the pairing name?#Seriously I need to be stopped#I just realized this is basically my Star Wars ship Kalluzeb#For real Aratak even has Zeb's facial hair style#Ikkotah has the pretty cheek patches#am I truly a cockatiel admiring pretty men's cheek patches???#am i even in control of my life anymore?#Now I'm reminded of the Kalluzeb/Horizon Zero Dawn crossover art commission I have it's very nice
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
A really bad trait of mine is that I do a lot of things out of spite, including refusing stuff, especially when it comes to media.
Like, these past two days everyone around me was like "OMG NIMONA IS SOOOO GOOD YOU HAVE TO WATCH IT!!"
And you know what? I don't care. Now I'm not gonna watch it JUST because everyone is screaming about it
#doesn't help that no one can fucking market it properly#idk if market is the right word but whatever#like. all I've heard is 'there are gay people in it' 'its by ND Stevenson' and 'a character says it's hard being a girl'#we're not in the 2010s anymore you can't make people watch stuff just because it's queer#we have variety of queer media now it's not enough#i realise that it probably actually is a good movie and I'm missing out#but... I've had people tell me i HAD to watch things forever#marvel... star wars... lotr...#bnha amphibia good omens the maze runner#+ a lot of shows i can't even remember the names of that my friend would recommend to me by saying 'there are lesbians'#with no other context#look I've even watched arcane 8 months after it came out despite everyone yelling about it#lok four years after the finale she-ra six months before season 5 dropped toh after season 1 was over#getting me to watch stuff is nigh impossible#well a big part of it is my insane anxiety over watching or reading new things#I'd much rather go rebinge something I've seen a bajillion times before thank you very much
7 notes
·
View notes
Photo
TRYING to work out Echo’s cat design so I can easily draw it with watercolours (i think i find the thin gel pen stripes easiest!) AND ALSO another character in this group of ocs: the owner of a local store that’s always wearing some knight armor HJKLSJDS Lucky’s cursed with final destination ass dangers following his every move so most townsfolk don’t like him around but the armor lady who runs the general store lets him in. because she’s industructible (helmet)
#art#traditional art#watercolour#oc art#ocs#oc group: unsorted#oc: lucky#oc: echo#oc: unnamed#realizing now that the armor lady looks a little like those bitches from the starred war. might need to alter the helmet deisgn a bit#also lucky isnt his real name. its absolutely a very ironic nickname from his oddly deadly bad luck curse hjkfldhjfksdjvds#also also to you who said in the tags of my previous lucky drawings that he looks like he gives good hugs u are correct#i think his hugs would be COZY
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
I swear my vocabulary has been ruined by this place
Bug annoys me? "I will eat you"
I really enjoy something someone wrote? My first instinct is "I'm eating this/I am consuming this/something similar"
Also earlier I texted saying a Slowbro set for the Cinderace event going on in SV fucks and my friend said, and I quote: "I am begging you to never word things like that again I am not young enough for new slang"
Edit: I don't know where I went in the tags it's late
#for reference my friend is my age so i found that very funny#its also interesting because like. i didnt have the shift in favorite character terminology that happened.#like i dont say 'i want to put him in the washing machine' and stuff like that. it didnt click with my brain.#unrelated but sometimes being able to remember shit really well is cool (like the lego star wars thing from earlier like i was 90% there)#but sometimes it sucks when you cant find what youre remembering. like this one set of d&d alignment videos i tried to find#there are so many i couldnt find it. i dont remember the channel name but the vid for chaotic good had robin hood on it#and i think lawful neutral had robocop? maybe they just talked about him in the video?#and i cant. fucking find the videos.#another thing i remembered i was eventually able to find again. these two people doing a thing doing dex stuff for all the pokemon#first time i looked i thought they were gone but second time i did find them. channels dead but at least it exists#unlike skydoesminecraft.exe where the only record is a full playthrough of the game i put on youtube. someone commented on it the other day#i hate when things go missing. i hate when people delete what they made from the internet. if its for privacy its. understandable.#i have unlisted some old yt vids of mine because my face was in them and i didnt want it on the internet#but otherwise. i dont like it. its why all of my terrible terrible wattpad fic is still out there. in case someone liked it.#it's 3 am i need to sleep
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
BNHA fandom thank you for coming OUT and saving me
#my life#my writing#I came out here to have a good time and am honestly having such a good time right now#DEEPLY amused tho that I have been Thrown Off by 'my little brother watches bnha and answered some of my questions over the holidays'#with him going 'there is not a single star wars reference in bnha'#leading to me having a solid two weeks of existential crisis of 'DID THE FANDOM JUST CHOOSE TO NAME EVERY LOCATION#AFTER STAR WARS LOCATIONS IN A MASSIVE INSIDE JOKE THAT NO ONE TOLD ME ABOUT'#'THE SAME WAY THAT ALL CATS ARE NAMED SUSHI'#'LIKE ALL CATS ARE NAMED SUSHI I BET THERE WAS A CUTE CAT NAMED SUSHI SOMEWHERE BUT RANDOMLY NAMING EVERYTHING AFTER STAR WARS LOCATIONS#IS A VERY BIG JOKE FOR THE FANDOM TO PLAY ON ME PERSONALLY'
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
I constantly have to resist the urge to make bubble comics x star wars au
#this is such a sexy concept#I especially enjoy thinking about all the fucked up stuff that can happen#(and actually I'd like to see this au go both ways. let BC charas come to SW and vice versa)#yes. I started thinking about it because Balor impersonated Yoda just to piss Yana off in Dreamcatcher.#now I think about this all the time. they are probably force sensitive in this au. which means...#Yana is Danila's padawan for example. she later confides in a dubious force user named Balor.#who teaches her things she's not supposed to know (including tricks of the dark side). he's neither sith nor a jedi.#just a very suspicious motherfucker who knows way too much and hides in the shadows.#this was a small part of my Demonslayer x SW au#but there is more! for every comic line 😘😂#Realmwalkers for example... I just realized that Andrey and Ksenia are so Anidala coded... which makes Danila Obi-Wan in this situation🤡#anyway...#if Realmwalkers and Demonslayer SW versions are set before during and after Order 66 (the idea I entertain wholeheartedly)#then Exlibrium guys are actually more of a High Republic kind of deal#I'd like to think that. hehehe.#Allies are probably set in Rebellion era which is a scary but very good concept.#and Meteora... wait. BITCH METEORA IS LITERALLY STAR WARS BUT IN BUBBLE COMICS 🤡🤡🤡#I only have to change a few things and voilà we have the best contrabandist team ever known.
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
i just started playing ‘the forgotten city’ on my switch and i am having sO MUCH fun, it’s so cool
#it's like. groundhog day. but set in ancient rome#and it's not combat based (altho there is combat) which is good! because i am not good at combat#i'll do it but it's not my thing#very much intrigue and interesting and i think it may be spawning my first non-lotr / non star wars oc in years#her name's erin :)#(or. arin. idk which spelling i'mma go with). she's an archaeologist#that's. abt all i have so far lol#og post
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I read a whole ass 1000 pages Asimov book bc I was 9 and thought Empire was a made up word for Star Wars like Alderaan or kessel etc and the book must be about empire in star wars. It had robot sex in it.
Yknow that post about that person watchin Parasite expecting there to be an actual flesh parasite monster.
Well I was readin “Invisible Man” by Ralph Ellison, which is a good book about a man tryna find his way in a world that doesn’t want him after his entire life plan fuckin falls apart (the invisibility in this case is metaphorical).
And I was NOT reading “THE Invisible Man” by H.G. Wells (which does in fact star an actually invisible man)
So I’m readin like ‘damn, this dude fuckin goin through it! The groups of power present truly do not see him as the man he is, but rather what they wish him to be! Making him, metaphorically, invisible!
…
And then he’s actually gonna turn invisible!!!!”
#It is funny the other way too - cant remember the name of the movie but it shared a name with b-class monster horror#and I start warching this “very good recommended for me great movie” and at some point I was like ok i have been trolled#I too went into Parasitr knowing nothing of it thinking theres a literal parasite and it actually enhances experience when you figure it out#why cant i remember the name of the movie but it took me atleast half an hour to notice my mistake#Honestly though the Asimov book may not have been about star wars but I can not believe I actually read it#and understsood very little bc i was indeed 9 and it was Isaac asimov not the easiest read for most adults either lol#WE DID NOT HAVE INTERNET OR CABLE TV AND HOBBIES WERE TOO EXPENSIVE except reading library is a friend#parasite#star wars#godzilla#isaac asimov
43K notes
·
View notes
Text
Move To A Darker Place
This is a story of Man Vs. Machine.
---
Last March, my father attempted to file his Taxes.
My beloved father is a Boomer. Unlike most Boomers, my father is rather handy with technology because he was one of the people that had a not-insignificant hand in Developing a hell of a lot of it. He was studying Computer Science at Cal Poly before the computer science degree existed. I have many fond childhood memories of skipping through the aisles of various electronic and computer part warehouses while Dad described something that either terrified the staff or made them worship him as a God. He taught himself how to use his smartphone. Internationally.
So when he saw the option to file digitally with the IRS through the “ID.me” program, he leapt at the chance to celebrate the Federal Government finally entering the Digital Age.
It was all going swimmingly for about six hours, until he was ready to file and the system told him that it needed to verify his identity.
“Very Well.” said my father, a man unafraid of talking to himself and getting something out of the conversation. “It wouldn’t do for me to get someone else’s return.”
The System told him that it needed him to take a “Digital Image ID”.
a.k.a: A Selfie.
“A-ha!” Dad beams. Dad is very good at taking selfies. He immediately pulled out his phone, snapped one, and tried to upload it.
Please log into your Id.me Account and use the provided app to submit your Digital Image ID. The System clarified.
“Oh. You should have said so.” Dad pouted, but used his phone to log onto the ID.me account, do the six security verification steps and double-checked that the filing looked the same as it did on the desktop, gave the IRS like nine permissions on his phone, and held up the camera to take his Federal Privacy Invasion Selfie.
Please align your face to the indicated grid. Said The System, pulling up a futuristic green-web-of-polygons approximation.
“Ooh, very Star Trek. Gene Roddenberry would HATE this!” Dad said cheerfully, aligning his face to the grid. My father is a bit… cavalier, when it comes to matters of personal information and federal government, because he’s been on FBI watchlists since the late 60’s when he was protesting The Vietnam War and Ronald Regan before he’d broken containment. Alas.
Anyway, there is very little information the federal government does not have on him already, but he’s as good at stalking the FBI as they are at stalking him, and had worked out a solution: He has something approaching a friendship with the local Federal Agent (Some guy named “Larry”. Allegedly), and got Larry hooked on Alternative Histories and Dad’s collection of carefully-researched “there is very likely buried treasure here” stories, and Larry is loath to bother his favorite Historical Fanfiction author too much.
But I digress.
After thinking for a minute, The System came back with an Error Message. Please remove glasses or other facial obstructions.
And here is where the real trouble began.
See, my father wears glasses that do substantially warp the appearance of his face, because he is so nearsighted that he is legally blind without them. His natural focal point is about 4 inches in front of his nose. While Dad can still take a selfie because he (approximately) knows where his phone is if it’s in his hand, he cannot see the alignment grid.
He should ask someone to take it for him! I hear the audience say. Yes, that would be the sane and reasonable thing to do, but Dad was attempting to do taxes at his residence in Fort Collins, while his immediate family was respectively in Denver, Texas and Canada. He tried calling our neighbors, who turned out to be in Uganda.
He looked down at the dog, Arwen, and her little criminal paws that can open doorknobs, but not operate cell phones.
She looked back at him, and farted.
“Well, I’ll give it a try, but if it gives me too much trouble, I’ll call Larry, and Larry can call the IRS about it.” Dad told her.
She continued to watch him. Arwen is an Australian Kelpie (a type of cattle-herding dog), going on 14 years old, deaf as a post and suffering from canine dementia now, but she still retains her natural instinct to Micromanage. She was also trained as a therapy dog, and even if she can’t hear my dad, still recognizes the body language of a man setting himself up for catastrophe.
So, squinting in the late afternoon light next to the back door, Dad attempted to line his face up with a grid he could only sort-of see, and took A Federal Selfie.
The System thought about it for a few moments.
Image Capture Failed: Insufficient Contrast. The System replied. Please move to a darker place.
“...Huh.” Dad frowned. “Alright.”
He moved to the middle of his office, away from the back door, lit only by the house lighting and indirect sunlight, and tried again.
Image Capture Failed. Please move to a darker place.
“What?” Dad asked the universe in general.
“Whuff.” Arwen warned him against sunk costs.
Dad ignored her and went into the bathroom, the natural habitat of the selfie. Surely, only being lit by a light fixture that hadn’t been changed since Dad was attempting to warn everyone about Regan would be suitably insufficient lighting for The System. It took some negotiating, because that bathroom is “Standing Room Only” not “Standing And Holding Your Arms Out In Front Of You Room”. He ended up taking the selfie in the shower stall.
As The System mulled over the latest attempt, Arwen shuffled over and kicked open the door to watch.
Image Capture Failed. Please Move to a Darker Place.
“Do you mean Spiritually?” Dad demanded.
“Whuff.” Arwen cautioned him again.
Determined to succeed, or at least get a different error message that may give him more information, Dad entered The Downstairs Guest Room. It is the darkest room in the house, as it is in the basement, and only has one legally-mandated-fire-escape window, which has blinds. Dad drew those blinds, turned off the lights and tried AGAIN.
Image Capture Failed. Please Move To A Darker Place.
“DO YOU WANT ME TO PHOTOGRAPH MYSELF INSIDE OF A CAVE??” Dad howled.
“WHUFF!” Arwen reprimanded him from under the pull-out bed in the room. It’s where she attempts to herd everyone when it’s thundering outside, so the space is called her ‘Safety Cave’.
Dad frowned at the large blurry shape that was The Safety Cave.
“Why not?” he asked, the prelude to many a Terrible Plan. With no small amount of spiteful and manic glee, Dad got down onto the floor, and army-crawled under the bed with Arwen to try One Last Time. Now in near-total darkness, he rolled on his side to be able to stretch his arms out, Arwen slobber-panting in his ear, and waited for the vague green blob of the Facial grid to appear.
This time, when he tapped the button, the flash cctivated.
“GOD DAMN IT!” Dad shouted, dropping the phone and rubbing his eyes and cursing to alleviate the pain of accidentally flash-banging himself. Arwen shuffled away from him under the bed, huffing sarcastically at him.
Image Capture Failed. Please move to a darker place.
“MOTHERFU- hang on.” Dad squinted. The System sounded strange. Distant and slightly muffled.
Dad squinted really hard, and saw the movement of Arwen crawling out from under the bed along the phone’s last known trajectory.
“ARWEN!” Dad shouted, awkwardly reverse-army crawling out from under the bed, using it to get to his feet and searching for his glasses, which had fallen out of his pocket under the bed, so by the time he was sighted again, Arwen had had ample time to remove The Offending Device.
He found her out in the middle of the back yard, the satisfied look of a Job Well Done on her face. She did not have the phone.
“Arwen.” Dad glared. It’s a very good glare. Dad was a teacher for many years and used it to keep his class in order with sheer telepathically induced embarrassment, and his father once glared a peach tree into fecundity.
Arwen regarded him with the casual interest a hurricane might regard a sailboat tumbling out of its wake. She is a force of nature unto herself and not about to be intimidated by a half-blind house ape. She also has cataracts and might not be able to make out the glare.
“I GIVE UP!” Dad shouted, throwing his hands in the air and returning to the office to write to the IRS that their selfie software sucks ass. Pleased that she had gotten her desired result, Arwen followed him in.
To Dad’s immense surprise, the computer cheerfully informed him that his Federally Secure Selfie had been accepted, and that they had received and were now processing his return!
“What the FUCK?” Dad glared. “Oh well. If I’ve screwed it up, Larry can call me.”
---
I bring this up because recently, Dad received an interesting piece of mail.
It was a letter from the IRS, addressed to him, a nerve-wracking thing to recessive at the best of times. Instead of a complaint about Dad’s Selfie Skills, it was a letter congratulating him on using the new ID.me System. It thanked him for his help and expressed hopes he would use it again next year, and included the selfie that The System had finally decided to accept.
“You know, my dad used to complain about automation.” Dad sighed, staring at the image. “Incidentals my boy! My secretary saves the state of California millions of dollars a year catching small errors before they become massive ones! He’d say. Fought the human resources board about her pay every year. I used to think he was overestimating how bad machines were and underestimating human error, but you know? He was right.”
He handed me the image.
My father was, technically, in the image. A significant amount of the bottom right corner is taken up by the top of his forehead and silver hair. Most of the image, the part with the facial-recognition markers on it, was composed of Arwen’s Alarmed and Disgusted Doggy face.
“Oh no!” I cackled. “Crap, does this mean you have to call the IRS and tell them you’re not a dog?”
“Probably.” Dad sighed. “I know who I’m gonna bother first though.” he said, taking out his phone (Dad did find his phone a few hours after Arwen absconded with it when mom called and the early spinach started ringing).
“Hey Larry!” Dad announced to the local federal agent. “You’re never gonna believe this. My dog filed my taxes!”
Larry considered this for a moment. “Is this the dog that stole my sandwich? Out of my locked car?” he asked suspiciously.
“The very same.” Dad grinned.
“Hm. Clever Girl.” Federal Agent Larry sighed. “I figured it was only a matter of time before she got into tax fraud.”
---
I'm a disabled artist making my living writing these stories. If you enjoy my stories, please consider supporting me on Ko-fi or Pre-ordering my Family Lore Book on Patreon. Thank you!
#Family Lore#Dogs#arwen#Arwen the Crime Dog#Taxes#Ronald Regan mention (derogatory)#long post under the cut#this one is funny this time#I could really use some extra tip money this month
9K notes
·
View notes
Text
Please Don't Scroll 🥺🙏
I need your help 🫂
Donate to me, even if just a little. Share the donation link among your friends. Do not stop supporting us if you love Gaza and Palestine 🇵🇸🍉💔
My campaign is very slow in donating, my friends 😔😭
Your support and donation to me will be a dose of hope for me and my family ❤️
We thank everyone who stands by Palestine and Gaza ❣️🇵🇸
Continue to support Palestine and Gaza. We are very tired and exhausted from the tragic life because the situation is very catastrophic 💔😔
We have nothing, no home🏠, no work🧑💻
I was injured in this war and so was my brother 😐
The resistance to life is non-existent, there is no food, drink, and good health due to the health and life disasters that occur in Gaza 🤬
My family and I are very tired, and many people in Gaza are suffering like me and perhaps more 😔
I hope for your support in every way. It will help us. Do not stop supporting because we need you 🙏
Sending you lots of love and hugs for standing with us🇵🇸🍉🙏
@fairuzfan @sayruq @longlivepalestina @nabulsi @self-hating-zionist @thenewgothictwice @el-shab-hussein @risoria @palipunk @palestine @intersectionalpraxis @fallahifag @sealuai @malcriada @mangocheesecakes @youdontknowwhotfiamm @farcillesbian @stil-lindigo @apsswan @star-and-space-ace @rainbowywitch @marscodes @oursapphirestar @annoyingloudmicrowavecultist @boyvandal-blog @the-bastard-king @13ag21k @agentfascinateur
Link 🔗 donate 🙏👇
My GoFundMe account has been closed and the money will not be refunded. I have created a new link 👇
To be sure of my personality and know me more, follow me on my Instagram account 🙏👇❤️
My campaign is verified by @90-ghost
#free rafah#from the river to the sea palestine will be free#free palestine#gaza#palestine#gaza genocide#enghanaalulu#free gaza
4K notes
·
View notes