#a sexy idiot
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Text convo with the FWB.
Me: I'll wait to cook your food until you get here, so it's hot.
Him: thank you. Fuck. I'm so hungry and you're awesome.
Me: no worries.
Him: food....🤤 pussy.... 🤤 you....🤤
Me: Jesus. Dork. Haha, well, all three will be hot and waiting for you.
Him: ......okay, well, I'm NOT fucking the sandwich. I refuse.
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Essek and the rest of Bells Hells: Okay, we're going to Eiselcross, an icy, glacially-locked wasteland. Everyone grab some stuff to dress accordingly.
Dorian, Imogen, and Ashton:
#to be fair Ashton maybe doesn't really feel the cold that sharply#but the other two and Fearne and Laudna going full flowy chiffon is also valid lmao#WAIT. THESE THREE IDIOTS ARE TRYING TO LOOK SEXY FOR THEIR PARTNERS/CRUSHES 🫡#critical role#criticalrole#c3e96#Dorian Storm#Imogen Temult#Ashton Greymoore#cr official art#cr spoilers#critical role outfits
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Can we ignore everything in life for a moment and just talk about how hot he is? Fucking hell.
#good omens#crowley#aziraphale#aziracrow#good omens fandom#crowley x aziraphale#ineffable idiots#ineffable husbands#crowley x arizaphale#aziraphale x crowley#anthony j crowley#good omens crowley#azi if you don’t take him I will#smolder#fucking hot#so hot and sexy#in love with a demon#send help
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The heat was getting to be a problem.
The power had been out in National City for three days, and those three days were expected to be among the hottest of the year. Lena was, frankly, desperate.
You might think that she’d have it easy, but anyone who would think that a penthouse in a skyscraper would be easy to cool would quickly be disabused of that notion. The windows mostly didn’t open and having the balcony doors spread wide did next to nothing when the breeze felt like opening an oven, even up here.
It had been Alex’s suggestion, sent by text.
Why don’t you go to Kara’s? The loft is pretty breezy.
She was right, of course. When Lena arrived, Kara had every one of her huge loft windows open, allowing the breeze to flow freely through the open, airy space.
There was another problem, though.
When Kara opened the door, Lena nearly keeled over. Kara was wearing a sports bra and shorts so short they barely deserved the name, exposing a vast amount of golden, sun-kissed skin. Worse, her gloriously muscled stomach and shoulders glistened with sweat.
Lena was surprised to see that the heat bothered her, but it clearly did. Kara had forgone her glasses, too, and after she opened the door, she swept the back of her hand across her forehead and sighed.
“Hi,” Lena squeaked.
“Hi yourself. Hot out there?”
“It’s hot in here.”
“Come in, come in,” said Kara.
Lena stepped inside, forcing herself not to stare at Kara’s thick thighs and the swell of her chest under straining fabric. Was that zipper some advanced Kryptonian technology?
“Want something to drink?”
“Isn’t your fridge dead, too?”
“Yeah, but I cheat. Watch.”
Kara slipped a bottle of water out of a pack on her counter and breathed on it. Ice crystals formed on the surface and the water visibly chilled. It shocked Lena when she accepted it and the cold water on her lips was bliss. Lena let out a soft sigh and closed her eyes, savoring the feeling of cold spreading through her chest, cooling her body.
When she opened her eyes, Kara was the one staring. Lena had thrown on a short, a-frame sun dress that bared her back, for no other reason than making sure that her skin could have as much surface exposed to the air to evaporate and cool her down as possible.
“So what are you up to?” Lena asked.
Kara gestured to the notebook and stacks of papers on the table.
“Old-fashioned journalism, I guess. My laptop battery died yesterday.”
“I thought you’d be out there trying to fix the power.”
Kara shrugged. “With what, my super-electrician powers?”
Lena shot her a look, raising her brow.
Kara turned away, heading for the windows.
Oh, Jesus, Lena thought.
It wasn’t as if Lena hadn’t… noticed Kara’s physique. She wasn’t blind, after all. They’d taken spin class together, and Kara liked to wear leggings on the weekends.
But holy shit, those shorts made her ass look… Super.
Lena was still fumbling over a buns of steel pun in her head when Kara turned back.
“Hey, you okay? Your heart raced for a second there.”
“F-fine,” said Lena.
“Alex and the others are coming over tonight for an emergency game night,” said Kara. “I better get ready.”
For the next couple of hours, Lena helped Kara neaten up her apartment and prepare non-perishable snacks and a cooler full of beer and wine coolers, chilled care of Kara. Alex and Kelly were the first to show up, with Alex giving Lena a cheeky look as she walked into the apartment.
“Hey, you two,” she said. “Been having a hot time?”
There was something brittle in Kara’s laugh that set Lena a little on edge, and the Danvers sisters shared one of those looks they shared that made Lena wonder if they could communicate telepathically. Whatever the message was, it made Kara look away first, distracting with an offered beer that Alex gladly accepted.
Lena took a wine cooler, wishing it were wine.
Nia and Brainy showed up next, followed by J’onn, who was the only one fully dressed in a button-down shirt and khakis, while everyone else was dressed for the beach or a track meet.
Lena sat on the floor, because the hardwood was cool under her butt, and leaned back against Kara’s couch. Kara sat beside her and Lena’s heart definitely sped up.
Looking over, it was hard to tear her eyes away. Kara made a magnificent display- the blocky weight of her shoulders, full biceps and strong arms and bulky, sculpted forearms. Lena’s eyes followed the vein on the back of Kara’s arm down the back of her strong hand and the elegant lengths of her fingers.
Kara kept her nails neatly trimmed like that because of Supergirl duties, right?
Right?
“Hey Luthor? You having a heat stroke?” said Alex. “You look spaced out over there.”
Alex had a playful grin plastered on her face, though she too was sweating profusely. A cooler breeze rolled in through the big windows and everyone sighed in delight.
Except J’onn. “What shall we play first?” she said.
“Clue!” Nia chirped.
“Brainy always kicks our ass at Clue,” said Alex, “and I am not playing Monopoly with a literal billionaire again.”
“Perhaps we should play Risk,” said J’onn, rifling through the game shelf.
“We could try Twisted,” Kara suggested in a deadpan voice.
Lena swallowed hard, thinking of herself tangled up on the mat with Kara, clothes glued to their skin by sweat, salty skin sliding against salty skin, the scent of her…
“Earth to Lena,” said Alex. “Got any ideas?”
“Exploding Kittens,” said Lena. “We haven’t done that one in a while.”
“Kara, chill us some cold ones, will you?” said Nia.
Once everyone had a rapidly warming drink, Brainy dealt the cards and the game began. Alex called Kara out for peeking several times, with that loaded Danvers Sisters Look and an almost predatory smirk.
She wasn’t the only one peeking.
Lena participate in the game but her mind was elsewhere, specifically the valley of Kara’s broad back, where sweat gathered between her muscles and rain down in heavy beads, or the sweat gathering along her collarbone or sparking along the lush inner curves of her tightly contained breasts.
“Hey,” said Kara. “It’s your turn, Lena.”
Then she reached over and brushed damp lock of inky hair out of Lena’s eyes.
She could have melted. She swallowed hard, brushed the sweat from her brow, and made a hasty and wasteful play that would probably cost her any chance of winning, but she didn’t care. The game seemed at most a distant concern.
Kara’s tongue glazing along her soft pink lips was much more interesting. They’d pretty much all given up on makeup but Kara was still positively radiant, soft and inviting and homey in a way that made Lena ache in her chest.
And, uh, other places.
It was full dark now, so they finished the game and Kara and Alex got up to light a few candles.
“This is like camping,” said Nia.
“We should have thought to procure ‘marshmallows’, said Brainy. “Kara could toast them with her heat vision.”
“We hardly need more heat. I’m boiling,” said Lena.
J’onn let out a soft grunt. “It’s my turn to go on patrol. I think I’ll be the first to head out.
Everyone gave their goodbyes as he headed out the window. The others huddled closer around the table, lit by the candle sitting in the middle.
“We should tell scary stories,” said Alex. “Like around a campfire.”
“Since it was your idea, you go first,” said Kelly.
Alex leaned into it with abandon, leaning in over the table as she started spinning a campfire yarn that Lena quickly recognized as The Hook.
Kara edged closer, until her bare thigh pressed against Lena. She leaned in close, and it wouldn’t have taken much for Lena to… rest her head on Kara’s shoulder. It just kind of happened, Kara’s scent filling her nostrils as she turned into Kara.
Lena flinched as Kara shot her a concerned look.
She can hear my heartbeat.
Kara must have thought Lena was scared, because she casually slipped an arm around her.
Lena’s breath caught. Kara’s powerful arm rested lazily around her hip and her relaxed hand rested on Lena’s thigh, fingers placed lightly on bare skin.
It was a powerfully possessive gesture, not just protective but… more. Lena shifted a little and let herself completely fall against Kara.
Alex kept on telling the story, her gaze pausing heavily on the two of them as she scanned the room. Brainy looked bored but Nia looked genuinely petrified and Kelly was looking at her wife with the kind of adoring reference that was currently plastered on Lena’s face as she looked up at Kara.
Alex reached the crescendo of the story and Lena let out a little gasp, turning her face into Kara’s neck, more for the sake of it than out of fear. Kara’s hand stroked lazily up and down her back.
“Don’t worry, I won’t let anyone get you,” Kara whispered.
“You two okay over there?” said Alex.
“Fine,” said Kara.
“There are two actual couples here and you two are the ones doing the heavy petting.”
They weren’t heavy petting. Okay sure, Lena had her fingers curled around Kara’s hip and Kara’s hand was staring to pass the platonic zone when stroking her back but…
Oh.
“It’s getting late,” said Kelly. “Maybe we should head home.”
“Agreed,” said Nia. “Come on, Brainy.”
Lena and Kara didn’t get up.
The others did, piling out of the apartment. Alex went last, shooting Kara another of those damned looks, smiling like a self-satisfied cat after a big stretch.
The door closed and Kara yawned.
“Mind if I stay?” Lena said, quickly. “My place is just too hot to sleep.”
“Of course,” Kara said softly.
Lena didn’t move. They were alone now, the apartment dark except for candles that threw flickering shadows and made Kara even more ethereal. Lena could barely believe someone so gorgeous could be real.
“Lena,” Kara said quietly. “Have you ever thought about…” she trailed off.
“About what?”
“Us. What we are to each other.”
“Yes,” said Lena.
“Me too.”
“What are you thinking?” Lena asked.
“You’re my best friend. You mean more to me than basically anyone else, and the thought of you has kept me going through some really dark times.”
When Kara smiled for her, her eyes lit up, sparkling in the candlelight, like moonlight dancing on nighttime waves. She was entrancing.
“I…” Lena began. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you as just a friend. There’s more on the table if you want it.”
“More like… kissing?”
“Yes, exactly.”
This was actually happening. It was real, not a daydream or a fantasy. Kara moved with agonizing slowness, full of a gentle, kind intensity as she leaned down and lightly brushed her lips across Lena’s.
It was like being tossed in a tub of ice water… in a good way. Lena shivered as Kara cupped her jaw and went for another kiss, more forcefully this time, more insistent. The breathed as one.
“Kara,” Lena whispered.
She couldn’t help it. Lena dragged her tongue over Kara’s skin, tasting the sweat pooled at the base of her neck. Kara let out a low moan followed by a deep basso rumble in her chest, pulsating in time with her breathing.
“Did you just lick my sweat?”
“Are you purring?!”
Kara giggled. “I can do lots of things.”
Lena looked up at her with lidded eyes. “Oh yeah? Show me what you got.”
She squeaked as Kara picked her up in a single smooth motion, and with a self-satisfied smirk, carried her towards the bed.
Later, as they lay in a tangle of perspiring limbs atop sweat-soaked sheets, the power thumped back on and the air conditioning began to blow over them, chilling Lena’s skin.
She barely noticed.
#supercorp#supergirl fanfiction#supergirl#supercorp fanfic#lena luthor#kara danvers#kara x lena#karlena#supergirl fanfic#ficlet#heat wave#they’re soulmates but idiots about it#idiots in love#Alex playing covert matchmaker#alex is like will you two just bang already i’m trying to play board games#communication is sexy#Kara is chivalrous#Lena Luthor loves Kara’s butt#Kara’s buns of steel as it were#requited crushes#requited pining#what are they waiting for?
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Crowley’s Coven is a menace. (This is after they stole his car keys.)
#illustrator#illustration#digital artist#crowley#good omens#good omens art#artist on tumblr#good omens aziraphale#aziraphale#good omens crowley#good omens aziracrow#aziraphale x crowley#ineffable breakup#ineffable#ineffable idiots#ineffable husbands#gaimanverse#neil gaiman#sexy witch#witches#witchcraft#witch art#coven#good omens fan comic#comic art#gleafer art#gleafer#Crowley’s coven
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Anytime Merlin lets his magic go feral and shows just how powerful he really is Arthur's always there with a stupid besotted look on his face and is like; Arthur: Marry me Merlin: We're already married Arthur: I don't care, marry me again
#he's a smitten idiot who loves how powerful his husband is#Arthur's kink for Merlin's magic#Feral Merlin is sexy Merlin#bbc merlin#merthur#arthur pendragon#merlin emrys#merlin#arthur x merlin
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no thoughts just the trend of future leo being a cowboy
#too much “wow hes so sexy” and not enough “idiot constantly falls off his horse”#this was. also an excuse to test out random shit autodesk had to offer#cough glow brush cough#I wanted to experiment with you#rottmnt#future leo
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do y’all think logan and wade will eventually meet thor and wade will absolutely fangirl over him. and logan would remember him mumbling about thor in his sleep while they were tied up in the void. and while wade fangirls it becomes clear that The Wolverine isn’t the only hero he’s excited to finally know. do u think logan would get a bit standoffish with thor and wade would hit him with the “if i didn’t know any better i’d think you were jealous, peanut ;)”
#thor goes for a handshake and logan grabs his hand just a little too hard so he’s like ‘wow what a strong grip u have my friend! ^-^’#like i’m assuming they’re idiots and haven’t worked their shit out by the time they meet thor#so all that flirting wade always directs at logan would end up getting directed at thor#because i mean. it’s thor. and who is wade wilson if he isn’t flirting with sexy men he just met#deadpool and wolverine#poolverine#deadclaws#wade wilson#deadpool#logan#wolverine#i’m just. thinkin thoughts and whatnot
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The way the only thing that makes Carmy crack a smile while being locked in the walk in is remembering the first and last meal Syd made him. Mind you, he didn't even try the fennel salad and the radicchio almost made him throw up.
#this idiot is so in love it's embarrassing#idiots to lovers#never in history has a man ever been so down bad#the bear#sydcarmy#sydney adamu#carmen berzatto#chefs kiss#syd x carmy#platonic and messy#carmy x sydney#charged and sexy#the bear fx#he's insane#who misspelled radicchio#the bear meta
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nooo brother elijah youre so sexy don't steal my equipment hahah
#fallout#fallout new vegas#fnv#craig boone#courier six#boone x courier#nooo dont come in this gold vault and get locked in youre so sexy hahahah#the sierra madre dlc is so fucking. idk what about it is so difficult to me but it is#i get LOST i get STABBED i get LIMB BLOWN UP from radio i FORGET how to save dean and have to reload a save from 2 hours ago#also yeah i imagine if the security systems remove equipment due to radiation... eli's leg brace is gonna get yoinked rip#have fun walking around with your bonk ass leg idiot -brother elijah probably#oc: eli#doodly thingy#fallout tag
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🐊🦩
#dofuwani#sir crocodile#donquixote doflamingo#monkey d. luffy#okay inside joke but if one of my b0bad1n followers likes dofuwani. These two idiots are reading a certain tin can helmets fanfic (?)#because im old and do I still rp with my gf and sometimes I draw the scenes and we were joking about ...so what its doffy reading?#“well dear hes reading this book about a knight in his personal exploration about religion. sexuality. beliefs. concepts of love. family...”#my gf inmediate response: HES READING[...] Gf again: of course he's not reading it completely for the story he's reading for the sexy parts#hatta art#my art
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im a fan of this guy
also these guys too or whatever;
(do not repost, click for a little more quality!)
#my art#please do not repost/trace/edit/copy/or claim#jrwi#just roll with it#jrwi show#jrwi the suckening#prince shilo#jrwi shilo#arthur bennett#jrwi emizel#flag on Emizel's shoulder is rabies. thumbs up emoji#unrelated he doesnt yet know he is nonbinary. crazy.#i honesty didntmean 2 put so much effort into arthur but it just kinda happened#did mean to put that much effort into Void tho#also yeah I gave Shilo the amongus anime eyes i hope that’s noticeable#I think it’s funny#ALSO ALSO.#I think it’s rlly funny that the whole blood all over the cravat image-#if your typically ooo sexy vampire prince image. except it’s not#it’s Shilo being a helpless and frankly idiotic prince who doesn’t even know how to drink his breakfast without making a mess
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eeeeh! Your girls back to drawing! (at least for today.)
Gorgeous reference below.
#good omens#aziraphale#digital art#fan art#magician aziraphale#sexy aziraphale#good omens fanart#good omens 2#ineffable idiots#innefable husbands#I would die for Aziraphale#And Crowley#But this post is about Aziraphale#fell the marvelous
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Master manipulation moment accidentally cute by having to kneel to kiss
#when I tell u the casualness of this scene was completely erased because he had to kneel down like a dog to kiss her LOL IDIOT#ur telling me u had to work that hard to kiss her and ur gonna be chill about it later? I don’t think so#I’ve seen this scene a million times with average sized tavs and it’s always like ooooooh sexy but I audibly awwwed it was ridiculous hfkdfh#astarion x tav#diatrix#astarion#deep gnome#bg3 tav#baldurs gate 3#bg3#my oc#my art
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I don't care if he missed. This was extremely cool and sexy of Lucanis actually.
#not me obsessing over this scene#pretty sure my mouth was hanging open like an idiot the first time I saw it like... the man really IS a god killer huh#and a sexy disaster of a man to boot. its like he was designed for me#lucanis dellamorte#spite#dragon age veilguard#veilguard spoilers
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Ben & Laz Beetlejuice edition
they’re both Beetlejuice bc the name of the new movie is “Beetlejuice Beetlejuice” wink wink (and they both rock this stripy suit)
oh, and I made myself another t-shirt👀
#ben willbond#larry rickard#beetlejuice#rickbond#sexy idiots#I meant-#six idiots#six idiots fanart#them there#laurence rickard#digital art#the six idiots#beetlejuice fanart#ghosts fanart#bbc ghosts#procreate#the six idiots fanart#fanart#crossover fanart#beetlejuice beetlejuice#yeah yeah I know Halloween is not here yet
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