#a sacrifice he made for his people
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#bloodborne#micolash host of the nightmare#decadentart#every time i read his full title i read it in an announcer voice#micolash …. His greed sickens me#and so does his perspective nightmare cage.. Boy i can barely draw rhat thang#also the text is from the poem Spleen…..#specifically the lines which translate to -#‘When the rain stretching out its endless train - Imitates the bars of a vast prison - ‘#‘And a silent horde of loathsome spiders - Comes to spin their webs in the depths of our brains’#fyi his anatomy looks a bit weird because his clothes are so bulky and layered . and hes so skinny#He really did kill all those people Huh#i mean . u know what my forest grandpa slways says… sacrifices must be made ❕❕❕
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Roshan walks with the two Potts, gazing around at the fields and forests painted in warm colors by the setting sun. He remarks, "It is a lovely view from here."
Gazing outward, past the broken walls he had put up 20 years ago, Arthund nods and says, "Forgot. Forgot how... how pretty it all is."
I recently finished running an original oneshot for some friends, The Reaching Woods. It was a story about a little village surrounded by a big wall and the nearby forest's sudden overgrowth threatening to crush it all. It was also a story about blame and guilt.
Arthund Potts, when we met him, could barely speak at all. Too many years spent drinking and weeping. If he was even conscious he was all grunts and sloppy gestures. The scene above was at the end of the oneshot (okay, eighteenshot), once the party returned from the dark, evil woods.
#dungeons and dragons#dnd#dnd art#dnd character#not my character#roshan#aasimar#oneshot#the reaching woods#my first time DMing!#i couldn't find anything i wanted to run so i just made something up#oneshot starting with the saddest little village with the three saddest old people (and an old dog) around#started with my love of the “little village with a big secret” setup#almost certain it started with the general Feeling of that little village in An American Werewolf in London#nothing else in common but i just love that vibe you know#anyway#the joke with this campaign was it was going to end with The Greatest Fire Known to Faerun#and if they DID burn the evil woods down that I would then make them play a party of fire investigators trying to find out what happened LO#and it did end with a fire#but fortunately it did not spread throughout the forest#oh yeah there was also a sacrifice-happy cannibalistic frog kingdom#ANYWAY...#good job party#roshan's an aasimar btw#he's got this aureola around his head#imagine your little village being saved by an angel...................#though there was a tiefling in the party too so they canceled each other out#anyway....#this scene felt so emotionally satisfying
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Still very wild to me when people try to gotcha Jason with the whole "if you can kill other people for being evil why can't they kill you" when jason is like. One of the most passively suicidal characters I've ever seen. What if man
#augh i dont want to cw this because im just talking about The Character and i feel bad when i do it for characters but i probably should#suicide mention#ask to tag#while im here i do absolutely believe hes been suicidal since jaybin times. maybe even before just in different ways. but like#going into that building with shelia? yeah#now. i DONT think he was aware of it and if youd ask him hed say no fully believing thats the truth#but like if a ghost jaybin had some introspection time i think he'd maybe eventually be like yeah#his outcomes to him were have a loving parent or die and hes a very big fan of ultimatums like that.#but he doesn't fully see it like that as jaybin because oh hes a hero and saving others when no one else can is what heros do :)#ramble. ivee been feeling it lately yknow how it is#ive once saw a post saying jason was planning to die after the joker was dead in utrh and yeagh i can see that#he puts A BOMB in his HELMET#suicidal characters in the context of hero stories are so fascinating to me. the self sacrifice.#the not caring about your own safety as long as you save someone else. the pushing yourself#the way itd be so easy to make it look like they just fell in battle. to be considered a hero in the end#anyway ive been glancing at suicidal jason todd fics. how bad is it that im still getting mad about characterization#because theyre not killing him right#AND ANOTHER THING. since im here and i try to avoid making posts about The Character like this so might as welk get it all out#think about suicidal jaybin as well as the fact 80s bruce very much considered suicidal people/people attempting like#weak and lazy? yells at them? i think thats about it. Very Much. je seems to straight up just hate them#again very much feel free to ask me to tag this one ^-^'#and i hope no one thinks im being callous here im very worried about that. i just its a very important part of his character to think about#and its fun to explore as someone who is passively suicidal myself#jason todd analysis#anyway no one look at me i am in my corner just rotating him#WAIT to clarify i dont think jaybin fully realized Just becauceof the heros sacrifice thing. i made it sound like that i believe#anyway. if you read him as suicidal since jaybin times and go to ditf with that lens like i did. well. the post death victim blaming..
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Wei Wuxian and Narrative Agency – Part Three
For Xiantober Day Five: Past and Present, in which the author gets very unhinged about what parts of the past are shown and how that’s affected by the present!
(Part One | Part Two | Full version on AO3)
The Power of Agency: Shaping the Narrative
When I've discussed Wei Wuxian's agency previously, I’ve talked about how what’s shown and omitted tells us about a character, and we’ve talked about the character himself. Though this is a niche topic, it’s not necessarily something out of the ordinary to analyse, and we can assume everything up to here has been in some way intentional.
This? Linking structure to a character’s in-universe preferences?
This is where we get unhinged.
Before I start, let’s quickly establish something which will be important later: although Wei Wuxian is the central character, MDZS isn’t strictly from his POV. While omitting events a character doesn’t like to dwell on and concealing things the character wishes to hide is common in books with only one narrator, MDZS has multiple narrators which it switches between relatively quickly. This includes Wei Wuxian, but it also includes nearly every major character that appears in the story, and omniscient narrator as well. As a default, this format doesn’t lead to this deliberate shaping and omission because of one character’s preferences, since we have many other sources of information and events – which is what makes Wei Wuxian’s influence over the narrative and structure so interesting. We could have access to a lot more information, and access to it at different times, than we do (and that’s not an insult, quite the opposite!).
To begin: we’ve established that times such as Wei Wuxian’s time on the streets, his three months in the Burial Mounds and his loss in the Siege aren’t shown because Wei Wuxian has little agency there. But that’s not the only special thing about them. They’re also the three most traumatic times in his life, and so moments Wei Wuxian himself either can’t remember, or doesn’t like to dwell on.
This is why discussing Wei Wuxian’s treatment of tragedy in his life was important. Firstly, it shows he doesn’t focus on the tragedy in his life, so the idea that the narrative not focusing on this tragedy relates to his character has merit; secondly, it affirms that this is not a passive trait, but a choice. Therefore, when the narrative omits events due to this aspect of Wei Wuxian, it’s respecting not only a character detail – which would be cool by itself – but also an active decision. One that shapes the story it’s made in.
In other words, its very structure is respecting Wei Wuxian’s agency!
Now, of course there are flashbacks to other moments of his past he probably wouldn’t like to dwell on, too. But within the structure, they’re only shown when Wei Wuxian is thinking about them (or when he has reason to)!
Wei WuXian hadn’t woken up yet. His eyes were still tightly shut, yet his hand didn’t let go either. He seemed to be dreaming, muttering, “… Don’t… Don’t be angry…” Lan WangJi seemed somewhat surprised. His voice was gentle, “I am not angry.” Wei WuXian, “… Oh.” Hearing this, as though he finally felt assured, his fingers loosened. Lan WangJi sat beside Wei WuXian for a while. Seeing that he was motionless again, he was about to stand up when Wei WuXian grabbed him with his other hand, hugging his arm and refusing to let go. He shouted, “I’ll go with you, quick, take me back to your sect!” Chapter 63, EXR translation
Which, of course, is him dwelling on…
Lan WangJi spoke one word at a time, “Go back to Gusu with me.” Hearing this, both Wei WuXian and Jiang Cheng were surprised. Quickly afterward, Wei WuXian laughed, “Go back to Gusu with you? To the Cloud Recesses? Why go there?” He immediately seemed to realize, “Oh. I forgot. Your uncle Lan QiRen hates crooked people like me. You’re his proudest disciple, so of course you’re the same as him, haha. I refuse.” Chapter 62, EXR translation
…the painful flashback immediately preceding this. The third set of flashbacks (which are also painful) are a similar case. Look at the contex:
He lifted the bottom of his robe, revealing a prosthetic leg made of wood, “This leg of mine was destroyed by you, that night in the Nightless City (…)” (…) “Wei WuXian, I won’t ask you if you remember or not. Both of my parents died by your hands. You owe too many people. You definitely won’t remember them either. But, I, Fang MengChen, will never forget! And never forgive you!” (…) “In the fight at Qiongqi Path, my son was strangled to death by your dog Wen Ning!” “My shixiong died by poison, his entire body festering due to your cruel curse!” Chapter 68 (immediately preceding the flashbacks), EXR translation
And Wei Wuxian’s own thoughts and words:
Wei WuXian looked at the cultivators before the Demon-Slaughtering Cave. Their expressions were the absolute same as those of the cultivators from the night of the pledge conference, pouring their wine on the ground as they took the pledge to scatter the ashes of the Wen Sect’s remnants and him. (…) Wei WuXian, “Now it’s time to ask just whom it is that treasures it so much. It’s like Wen Ning. Back then, some certain sects or so were scared to death of the Ghost General. They said they’d kill him on the surface, but behind their backs they hid him for over ten years. How strange. Who was the one that said his ashes had been scattered back then?” Chapter 79 (immediately succeeding the flashbacks), EXR translation
Once again, Wei Wuxian’s own thoughts relate to the flashbacks we’ve just been shown. And, as I previously mentioned, though all the events which are shown are tragic, they’re also events which Wei Wuxian’s own choices and actions shaped – which he has this to say about:
“The things I did, not only do you remember them, I remember them too. You won’t forget them, and they’ll stay even longer in my mind!” Chapter 82, EXR
Admittedly, this applies more to the third set of flashbacks than the second (which is still fitting as the third set was the most recent), as in the second, although he still had agency within and influence over his circumstances, the majority of the pain was caused by others’ actions (excluding, of course, the Golden Core transfer… which is something we know stays for a long time in his mind, albeit with a caveat we’ll soon discuss). But it’s still important to note – especially considering that otherwise, focusing on this very painful time in his life wouldn’t seem like something very in-character for Wei Wuxian to do.
Of course, this can all just be explained by good writing. It is best to insert flashbacks when they’re relevant to the characters and events in the present day! But it is interesting to compare these to the start of the (not painful) Gusu flashbacks, which open this way:
At a later time, Wei WuXian pondered upon the reason why his relationship with Lan WangJi wasn’t good. Getting to the root of the matter, everything started when he was fifteen, coming to the GusuLan Sect with Jiang Cheng to study for three months. Chapter 13, EXR
Again, considering the circumstances around which these flashbacks take place – returning to the Cloud Recesses for the first time since the lectures, and meeting Lan Wangji once more – it makes complete sense for Wei Wuxian to be thinking about these events*. So it does fit the pattern of Wei Wuxian dwelling on something, thus leading to the narrative dwelling on it, too (and being shaped by his thoughts)… but there’s another layer to this. Importantly, it is the only flashback where Wei Wuxian’s present thoughts don’t lead to this happening, with his thoughts at an unspecified future time leading to it, instead. I like to interpret this as the text saying that, since these events aren’t something Wei Wuxian wouldn’t focus on in normal circumstances, he can dwell on them at any time. Therefore, they’re free to come up in the narrative at any time as well, even if he’s not dwelling on them in the present moment!
So, to summarise: Wei Wuxian’s decision not to focus on the painful times in his life directly influences the narrative to not focus on these times. When painful times are brought up and shown to us, it’s in the context of him thinking about them in the present day, and even then, his most painful moments still aren’t shown to us. His agency in this regard is still respected by the narrative structure.
This is the main way his agency influences the structure of the narrative, but I’d like to talk about the revealing and concealing of information, too. For example, I said I’d talk about the Golden Core transfer – though Wei Wuxian does think about this many times, as evidenced by his internal narration in Chapter 103. But unlike everything we’re shown through the flashbacks, this is something Wei Wuxian is actively trying to hide from others. And the narrative respects this choice (Wei Wuxian’s agency, again), never reveals it even when it would be relevant in the flashbacks, and we find out not through narration, but through a character’s dialogue!
And to clarify – I know these aspects may not be in the book for this exact reason. Showing flashbacks in relevant moments is good writing, concealing an important plot point you want to do a reveal for is necessary writing, and MXTX has said she didn’t want to write about Wei Wuxian’s time in the Burial Mounds, due to not liking to write transformation sequences (and also because it would not be pleasant at all, which likely also applies to Wei Wuxian’s death). That doesn’t prevent it from also being intentional – MXTX’s intelligence is shown in many aspects of this book, and there’s nothing disproving it – but there’s no proof for either option, so I won’t pretend there is. I bring this up because I know this feels like I’m overanalysing, as I feel that way as well.
But, whether it’s intentional or not, it exists in the text, and I adore it – so, regardless, it’s something I’ll explore. Because taking this into account… We aren't just told about Wei Wuxian having agency, we aren’t just shown it in the text, we aren’t even just shown it through which parts of his past are shown and hidden in the structure of the text (as I talked about in Part One). The parts of the past that are shown and hidden also have an in-universe reason for being shown and hidden, this reason being the choices he makes! Agency is the ability of a character to influence the story they’re in, but Wei Wuxian’s agency, as a property of a character who only exists in-universe, shapes the out-of-universe structure as well! That’s how we’re shown its importance! How cool is that?
At The End Of The Road: Summary and Final Thoughts
In this essay, we’ve covered how important Wei Wuxian’s agency is not only to the events of the plot, but to the structure of the narrative as well. The narrative omits periods in which Wei Wuxian has little or no agency, in favour of showing us periods in which he does, even when important events happened in the former. This indicates that who Wei Wuxian is without agency isn’t important enough to be shown to the audience, and therefore that his agency is an integral aspect of his character in MDZS. We’ve discussed how both in-universe and out-of-universe, tragedy does not define him – out-of-universe, the tragic events in Wei Wuxian’s life are used not to build sympathy but rather to show his strength of character and who he still is despite going through them; and in-universe, he chooses not to focus on the negativity and resentment caused by his circumstances or others’ actions, instead staying true to his moral compass and enjoying his life in the present day. Finally, we’ve also explored how this choice is another reason for the omission of certain events from the narrative, resulting in his agency shaping the story in a very literal way – it affects the out-of-universe structure, as well.
It’s quite fitting, for a story whose essence is about defying a conventional narrative – that of righteous clans rising up and defeating a great evil – and about a character who defies many conventional narratives on his own – that of status defining how skilled you could be, that for a golden core being necessary for cultivation and other paths being unavailable, that of a tragic but complete story of someone killed for staying true to their moral code (instead, that character returns to life and has a happy ending) – to have its own narrative play a role in such an important and interesting way.
(Or, if an image would be preferable:)
Thank you for reading!
(Part One | Part Two | Full version on AO3)
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*This strong relation to the present day circumstances is another reason I love the flashback placement so much (and why I think it’s such a loss both screen adaptions altered it so strongly)!
#get ready for tag thoughts because there are a LOT of them#it’s for THIS reason that fanon wwx bothers me so much (didn’t want to get negative on the acual post)#bc so often all the changes are changes that woobify him!#self-sacrificial idiot wwx?? only doing things because… poor him he has so many internal issues and values himself so little-#-so of course he’d sacrifice everything before thinking of another option? woobifying#(whenever he sacrifices something it’s a deliberate choice to act on his morals because he values his morals so much – and he’s also very-#-capable and DOES often find ways for no people to get hurt!)#wasn’t aware that what happened to him at lotus pier was wrong and needs lwj to tell him that for him to have any idea if it?#woobifying (as we see in the lotus seed pod extra he KNOWS it’s unfair)#(he downplays it retroactively in his memory (links into not focusing on the bad things in his life))#(but that’s the actions themselves that are being downplayed not their fairness!)#he chooses to act! he is defined by acting! not tragedy – all the more impressive in the face of the amount of tragedy that’s happened#he could SO EASILY have been a woobie but instead he’s the opposite of one: defined BY his agency instead of the absence of it#that doesn’t mean he’s not impacted by tragedy or trauma – he is! but it’s not the most important aspect of his character (bc he doesn’t le#it’s also something that bothers me about the changes cql made#by making qq path and nightless city the fault of someone else it means he IS someone who’s more a victim of circumstance than anything els#he had no control over the tragedies of his first life at all#apart from ig his death being controlled by him? because he just leaps off the cliff during the nightless city siege?? but in THAT case it’#i watched that part recently (i’m getting through it very slowly) and yeah it reaffirmed my love for this aspect of the book even more#despite. having these exact thoughts for two years already#he also dwells on the past events a lot more than book wwx which adds to that version of him BEING defined more by tragedy rather than who#anyway over 7.3k words total (and 400 more in the tags apparently)... it'll be posted to ao3 in its completion this evening!#mdzs meta#my meta#wei wuxian#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#魔道祖师#grandmaster of demonic cultivation#gdc
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the fact that getting any sort of information on jon post tma ending in any way will just inevitably add on to his tragedy keeps me up at night
#oh he actually made it out and his sacrifice didnt mean anything? horrifying#oh he's trapped in a computer forever stuck narrating other people's stolen tragedies? worst nightmare even#oh he's now a creature of the eye haunting the streets of london killing innocent people? anyone's dream ending#there's no way to find anything about him and we don't know where he is? oh so he became the mystery he was afraid of becoming#to be fair i don't think error is jon but the possibility is terrifying#this man will never know an ounce of happiness#the magnus archives#jonathan sims#tma#the magnus protocol#tmagp
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hey guys do we realize that the main difference betwen how kai and midori developed is that kai was given the chance to learn what normal life and love and family was like by working with chidouins while midori was kept under asunaros thumb all his life. do we realize that just a few changes could have kai acting just as cruel and merciless as midori. do we realize that midori is a victim of asunaro too, and though that doesn't excuse his actions it does make them more tragic. do we realize this or are we all being serious when we say midori is the only character who isn't worth redemption.
#77ngiez speaks#yttd#sou hiyori#yttd midori#midori yttd#you can also see parts of this with fake hinako too#how she used to be just as cold and cruel and she just barely began softening uo when being shown care by the dummies#also it was physically painful to have to call sou 'midori' but thats what everyone in the fandom calls him so. sighs. sacrifices had to be#i am sou hiyori apologist numero uno i think he is a tragic character and a victim of his situation#i dont think that excuses his actions or behaviors but i also think we as a fandom must all keep in mind that he was raised in A LITERAL#DEATH CULT#people call it creepy when sou says he wished he coulda killed shin himself but people just call it sweet and tragic when sei asked kai to#kill him himself#as if they werent both the same sentiment that came from the same place#ahem. clears my throat#i think ppl should be a little nicer to sou. hes just a silly guy#and believe me i have reason to hate his guts [not elaborating but my beef with him is personal /srs]#but he is in fact my blorbo#if u guys can forgive miley safalin ranger and shin#surely you can forgive sou. just a smidgin#posts i made bcs i got mad abt ppl saying 'MIDORI CANT BE A GREENBLING HES TOO EVIL'#as if those same ppl dont eat up kai and sara siblingisms#OK I NEED TO SHUT UP NOW. thank u to anybody who read these tags in full
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Jedi June: Non-attachment/Letting Go
@jedijune
Shhhhhh I'm not late.
#jedi june#star wars#star wars rebels#ezra bridger#sabezra#tag rambling incoming#but seriously guys EZRA IS SUCH A GOOD JEDI *SOBS*#he willingly#selflessly#accepted a sacrifice to save his people that meant he might not ever even get to see lothal or his family again#simply because it was the right thing to do and he was the only one who could do it#to save what he loved he let it go#he made the choice even if it meant he wouldn't get to grasp what he wanted#he did what he could and then simply trusted in the Force#ezra is the anti-anakin#(text is lyrics from BarlowGirl's 'let go' which is the song google failed to find yesterday)
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Mario had two fucking partners die in PMTOK and I know Paper Mario likes to do that a lot but for some reason these ones hit different for me and I feel like no one gives it nearly as much attention as we should.
#pmtok#smb#bobby called him “big M” like he had a nickname#Olivia was like his fucking kid sorry i don't make the rules#like they're both two people that got to experience the world in a new lense and appreciate it#and their appreciation for yhe world is what made them sacrifice themselves for it#Bobby easily could have found a home with Mario and Olivia#Olivia was taken away just when she was mature and blossoming and just#she had so much more to grow and do and she's just gone#and just. man idk i can't believe PMTOK made me cry lmfao#ANYWAYS uuuh shit i got too serious#wahoo!! funny wahoo man!
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fragile things
"wen ning is a knife" - a wen ning playlist about violence, personhood, and autonomy.
Rain in Soho - the Mountain Goats No town more barren than our town No haven safer than the one they tore down No greater love than to lay my life down for a friend No sweeter pleasure than to see the credits clear through to the end
Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up) - Florence + The Machine This is a gift, it comes with a price Who is the lamb, and who is the knife?
Munich - Editors People are fragile things, you should know by now You'll speak when you're spoken to
Haemoglobin - Placebo How'd I ever end up here? Must be through some lack of kindness
Zombie - The Cranberries When the violence causes silence We must be mistaken
Cross Your Fingers - Laura Marling Oh, I jump into your grave and die And on my word you'll give up your whole life for me And you'll be reborn, bigger and stronger and less alive
The Killing Type - Amanda Palmer But I would kill to make you feel I don't mean kill someone for real I couldn't do that, it is wrong But I could say it in a song
She's Lost Control - Joy Division And a voice that told her when and where to act She said, "I've lost control again"
Me, I'm Not - Nine Inch Nails I feel it coming apart Well, at least I tried
Rose - A Perfect Circle So no longer will I lay down Play dead, play this Kneel down Gun-shy, martyr, pitiful
Alive Again - Marianas Trench I walk around like I'm alive again But I know it's just not the same
Big Bird - AJJ And I'm afraid of the mob mentality That makes otherwise normal people go blind
Placebo Effect- Siouxsie and the Banshees With your empty containers Another corpse ornaments your waiting room A placebo effect reversed
Blind Dumb Deaf - The Cocteau Twins [lyrics aren't important. just vibes]
Creature Song - The Mountain Goats I remember the burning in my body And the buzzing in my head And yeah, I do remember your voice Smoothing over my only choice
On The Wire - Sisters of Mercy I don't sleep So I don't dream So I don't wake up frightened
Disorder - Joy Division I've got the spirit, lose the feeling Let it out somehow
Square Hammer - Ghost Hammering the nails Into a sacred coffin You call on me for powers clandestine
Sowing Season (Yeah) - Brand New Time to get the seeds into the cold ground It takes a while to grow anything.
#wn#it’s also about devotion and self-sacrifice but that was enough words already#the thing about wen ning is that I LOVE HIS THEMES#my bestie reminded me i made this playlist. it slaps if i do say so myself#i normally roll my eyes a bit when people add zombie onto playlists for characters just because they're Literally Zombies#but in this case i made an exception for wen ning. he got murdered in a prisoner of war camp so it fits#(ok the real reason is because 'what's in your head' is just nails. it is nails. he's got nails in his head.)
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Do you think the First Ninja has Survivor Syndrome? if so, how strongly does it manifest itself?
Oh absolutely, my boy is traumatized as fuck. 😬👌
Survivor Syndrome is no joke, and i feel like it's even worse when its not just your comrades in arms, but also family. In my own headcanon version of Norisu Clan, since First was the baby of the family, he did not just lose his siblings (some of who were like his parents), but also teachers, mentors, comrades and more importantly heroes to him. Like, imagine you look up to someone your whole life, who taught you everything you know, and you witness their demise, and you are so freaking devastated and angry and determined to avenge them... but also how in the hell can you even attempt to succeed when all of your heroes failed??? But he has to, there is literally no choice for him, because Sorcerer needed to be stopped and he was the last one standing.
And then he does succeed, and he is still alive. Like, I 100% headcanon First as someone who was prepared to die to finally contain the Sorcerer. And after surviving he wouldn't know how to live not chasing the Sorcerer anymore.
So besides the obvious pain and suffering, the nightmares and being unable to get close to people, I headcanon that the Survivor Syndrome manifested so strongly, that First literally threw aside any remains of his civillian identity, of a possibility of a normal life he could possibly have. Because if his siblings did not get to live their lives, why does he? The only thing that was left is the Ninja, the Norisu Ninja - the culmination if all the sacrifices his Clan made, his siblings made. And his only goal in life would be to ensure that Ninja will survive when they didn't. Even if it will cost him his mortal life and immortal soul. And if Ninja lives, the Norisu clan lives, the village and later Norrisville lives on. That's what pushed First into creating Ninjanomicon, to make sure that some remains of his siblings sacrifice lived on.
And I feel like this self-sacrificial mindset that First adapted, saddens the spiritual remains of his siblings greatly. They would probably prefer that after defeating the Sorcerer, that he forgave himself and tried to live a life, but also, like... they are spirits so there is not much they can do to change his mind? They can only bear witness to his suffering.
#que?#first ninja#rc9gn first ninja#rc9gn#imagine you survived all your family and your survivor guilt manifested so strongly that u metaphorically killed yoself#but made sure to keep the remains of your family alive by becoming a living avatar of the result of all their sacrifices and goals#yes i am absolutely normal about norisu clan why are you asking#also if you were just asking about more mundane suffering of first and his survival guilt: i headcanon him being unable to sleep because#of nightmares and constant need to be alert to protect others. BUT also chronicaly unable to get close to other people anymore because#he suffered such great loss of his siblings that were practically his whole life and all he ever knew. i mean he still cares about rest#of his clan and some of friends and students. but its just not the same. there is a wall of pain that doesnt allow other to be close#ALSO x2 MIS addition: these headcanons are the reason why i hc chase being so interested in first - in someone who threw aside himself#and why i keep tagging on my fics that first doesnt have a name for a reason xD the reason is survival guilt lol#and thats also why i wrote in After the Battle that First lives on the edges of the village - because he prefers not to get too close to pp#i AM SO NORMAL ABOUT FIRST trust me
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I just—I just need a minute because Letters just learned he was a real boy in time to have his big damn hero moment and it’s…😭
It’s not fucking fair.
#And the few people I’ve seen commenting because Otohan should have survived that explosion?#Please go take a long walk off a short cliff and turn yourself into a goldfish#It didn’t matter what Sam rolled you could tell Matt had already made his decision as soon as he confirmed that Sam knew the consequences#He honored FCGs sacrifice to save his friends by sacrificing Otohan#critical role#bells hells#cr spoilers#fcg
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guess who decided to catch up on Nesaak's secret discoveries
haha....
hah......
some horrors have been experienced BUT ITS FIIIIIIIIIINE... right? ANYWAYS SHOUTOUT BOB I LOVE BOB YAAAAAAYYYYYYYY
#mikamako art#wynncraft#yes i know he froze nesaak to protect everyonr BUT LIKE#WHAT IS SALVATION WHEN YOU FREEZE TBOUSANDS OF PEOPLE HIDUNG IN CAVES FOR IRLT#i also like to think he honors all 4 of his masters with graves he made for each of tgem :#SACRIFICE FOR THE GR3ATER GOOD MY ASS#SHOULDNT HAVE BEEN SO RUSHED AND GONE INSIDE THE DAMN PORTAL#DONT WORRY PAL ILL END YOUR SUFFERING SOON#in other news nilrem's letter was AWESOME#BOB NOT DEAD *AND* QUEER CONFIRMAYION???????#litwrally best day of my life#i also like to think he honors all his masters with gravestones he made for all of them :'D#he's a sweetheart he would do that#specially with Mael man... they were almost family..... BOB WAS AL.OST A TWAIN......#KILLING MYSELFBDMCBXN#also!!!! tasim!!!!! i miss him
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presented without comment
(chapters 280 + 344)
#unordinary#unordinary webtoon#cw blood#i fucking lied i have so many comments#FIRST AND FOREMOST. i originally had the images in the opposite order (meaning john’s on the left and rei’s on the right)#when i was drafting this post. but then i was like. ‘oh i should put them in chapter/chronological order instead’ and it oh my god#uru you bastard that’s so much worse#(and then ofc i had to rewrite my tags accordingly)#but anyways#like literally almost everything about these scenes is mirrored/opposite#obviously they are facing different directions (and thus. each other)#they are also looking at different places in the second panel - rei is looking up and john is looking down#rei is looking up directly at kuyo. yes. but his raised head also makes him look a bit defiant. his kind of smirk also adds to that feel#he’s obviously not… happy. he’s been through a lot (is literally about to die) but his spirit remains.#there’s still light in his eyes. hope.#and he still finds the time to tell kuyo to call it quits and give him well wishes#then we have john’s half which is. ough.#and uhh cw suicidal ideation from this point on i guess?#looking down! no light in his eyes! defeated and dragging himself to the finish line!#alone.#he’s still fighting but he’s TIRED. absolutely nothing to look forward to here.#keep going because there’s no turning back now#he is doing this for the people he’s already lost (jane william sera). not for people who are here now (blyke remi isen)#rei didn’t go into this thinking he would die but ended up choosing to sacrifice himself anyways#john went in with the intention of sacrificing himself and survived anyways#i could be reading too far into it but i think you can kind of see that in their expressions in the first image set#rei looks like he’s realizing he’s about to die but john just looks like he’s fighting#he’s already made his choice#that’s about all i got (and i’m at the tag limit) so.#to everybody who hated my john-william comparison post this one’s for YOU 🫵
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I've been wondering this for a while but
(and yes, I'm not considering the actual normal characters such as xie lian's mom and dad or anyone else. That just wouldn't be fun)
#my vote is pei ming#if you excuse his womanizing and generalky being a hoe#he's pretty normal#SPOILERS FROM HERE!!#In the kiln mountain fight this guy didn't do self sacrifice for his pride but apologized to the sword guy to team up#and for me that's way more of a normal people thing than anything else#feel free to put up your own arguments in tags#i have made way too many points myself for literally everyone here#mxtx tgcf#heaven official's blessing#tgcf#yin yu#ling wen#pei ming#lang qianqiu#shi qingxuan#yushi huang#mu qing#feng xin#tian guan ci fu
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Rank 52: The final duel!!
#I don't even know how to start in saying how much this scene hurt me. I don't even know if I can express what I'm feeling with words#because all I can think right now is how much I love Astral and how much he breaks my heart#he was born from hopes and he was given a mission that would protect the hopes and futures of his world (and all other worlds probably)#at the cost of his own existence#but that wouldn't have hurt because he wasn't created for feeling anything#He would have complete his mission with no regrets with no past with nothing to miss#just a little light of hope that would have defeated E'Rah sacrificing himself without leaving anything behind#and then he met Yuma#he started to know Yuma and his friends and adversaries and what emotions were#and the hollow hope become a person#a person who felt happiness fear love a person who now had a story and people who he would miss#and he still decided to carry on his mission because that would have protected what he now holds dear#those new emotions those connections were the key to beat E'Rah but were also what made him understand how tragic his fate was#but he didn't regret any of that#because it was Yuma and his friends and the emotions that they had made him feel that made his brief life worth living#(sometimes I forget that in the manga Astral was probably sent to Earth soon after he was created. That “brief life” is heart-breaking)#and Yuma asking him if he was okay with that and if he wasn't scared#and Astral saying that he wasn't given any means to feel such terror but he was now scared#and yet he found that fear wonderful because that means he was alive#all those emotions were what made him truly alive#not a tool not a hollow hope but a real person who still decided to sacrifice himself for protecting everyone#astral zexal#astral yu gi oh#yuma tsukumo#yu gi oh zexal#zexal#yugioh zexal#zexal manga#Zexal manga spoiler#ygo zexal
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Poor little meow meow literally moments before he commits multiple atrocities~ <3 uwu
SPOILERS: he sacrifices Shak and then opens the coffer with all the Dread magic and unleashes hell on earth
#Daniel Spellbound#Jayce Chinda#Shakila Chinda#I should post more screenshots but also wanted to post my edited ones... that I need to finish#I feel like people think I woobify him in my AU version and in general but want everyone to know#I think he's awful in the show for the most part but the issue is that his character was too inconsistent for me to make a solid judgement#on if it was him or the Dread the whole time bc he flip flops a lot and it often doesn't make sense even from an evil plan perspective...#Did he sacrifice Shak anyway and be manipulative to do it? Yes#Did it feel totally in character for him to do so with hardly any remorse? Not... really?#My point is: I think he can be a shitty person and still actually care for his sister despite this. I wish they made it clearer which it wa
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