#infected my brain so quickly i feel like a new person

[randomminty]

Five billion octopath 2 scribbles i feel sick

[bangtanficsforyou]

They Reject You (maknae line)

Pairing: maknae line x reader (fuckboi! Jimin x Reader, Co-worker Taehyung x Reader, Idol Jungkook x Reader)

Warnings: swear words here and there.

Word count: 4.6K

Park Jimin

"Well if it isn't my favourite girl." A voice slurs slowly, right next to your ears which makes you flinch in surprise.

"Jimin, gosh, what's wrong with you?" You say in an annoyed manner, immediately recognising the person. "Also, maybe keep some distance?"

Jimin pouts exaggeratedly and puts extra effort into widening his eyes for special effects. "Don't you find me being this close to you, heart racing-ly desirable?"

"Heart racing-ly? That's a new one," you snort and roll your eyes. "But to answer your question; no. It is not heart racing-ly desirable." 

"Lie all you want but we all know the truth," Jimin smirks and you can't help but wonder how on earth he manages to remain this cocky even when drunk.

"Cut the crap and stop wasting my time." You turn around to leave, not wanting to give Jimin the time of your day. From your previous experiences, you know that Jimin only ever causes trouble.

"I'm not feeling good, Y/N," he whines, all cockiness suddenly gone from his tone as he pleads gently. "Don't leave me."

You contemplate for a split second before huffing in defeat. "What do you mean by you're not feeling good?" 

"I don't know," he shrugs with a sad frown. "I just don't feel good."

Instinctively, you place your palms on his forehead only to find his skin to be burning hot. 

"Jimin!" You exclaim, your feelings of indifference instantly turning into that of concern. "You have high fever."

"That might explain why I was feeling so hot," he nods. "But I thought that was because of how attractive I am."

Any other time, you would have retorted with a comeback but right now you pay no attention to his words. "Come with me, we need to get you back to your room. You need rest." 

Much to your surprise, Jimin doesn't throw a protest and lets you hold his hand as you make way for the both of you through the partying crowd. 

Thankfully his room is only upstairs (one of the many pros of being a frat boy living in a frat house) and you don't have much trouble getting there.

Making Jimin sit on the bed, you look for medicines that can help with his fever. "How long have you been feeling unwell?"

"For about an hour."

You have half a mind to lecture him on how drinking should be the last thing he should have done while feeling unwell, but you decide to keep it in. Maybe when he's sober and in a better health condition, you will give him an earful.

Right now, it's more important to understand the severity of the situation.

"Did you stay out for too long at night? Or stayed with wet clothes on? Or something that might have led to you having a fever?" 

Jimin's drunk mind feels perplexed by the series of questions you're throwing his way. "Does it matter?" 

"Yes, it does," you respond shortly.

As a nursing student, you know how important it is to know the source of any sickness. If his fever can be tracked down to any possible cause, you'd have this reassurance that there's most likely nothing to worry about. However, if the fever seems to have appeared out of nowhere, there are chances that it may be a symptom of some underlying infection.

Your response makes Jimin think. Has he done anything in recent days that could have led to this? At first, nothing comes to mind. But after a few moments of intense brainstorming, something clicks in his brain.

"Does having two hours of shower sex count?" He queries seriously.

Your hands momentarily falter on their journey of looking for the first aid box but you recover quickly. 

"Should have expected something like that from you," you grumble in annoyance.

"Don't be mean," he complains in a whine. "It's not my fault that the sex was so good. Plus, she kept asking for more and you know I can't say no to that."

You slam the drawer shut and aggressively open the box, having finally found it. You take out a tablet and hand it over to Jimin with a glass of water. 

Once Jimin has taken the medicine, you arrange the pillows for him and take a blanket out. "Go to sleep. Let your body have some rest."

"Are you leaving?" He asks in a quiet voice, reminding you of a small child asking a question they already know the answer to.

"I don't think I have any purpose being here. I'll ask Jungkook to stay with you in case you need something."

"Jungkook won't take care of me the way you do," Jimin replies with a huff, thoroughly displeased with the idea of you leaving him.

"That's not my issue," you shrug.

Jimin switches to his last option, one that works every time and on everyone; his famous, irresistible puppy eyes. "Do you not have any sympathy for me?"

You scoff, your patience running thin. You really don't want to have a fight or speak your mind while he's having a fever, but if he continues to prod you this way, he will be responsible for the inevitable outburst.

Jimin feels unhappy with your lack of response and he attempts once again. "Won't you do this much for me? Please?"

That's it. The way his soft voice pulls at your heartstrings does it for you.

"Can you, for once, not think only for yourself?" You snap.

Now that was not the reaction Jimin was expecting. "What do you mean?"

"Don't try to play dumb," you roll your eyes and cross your arms. "Don't tell me you have no idea how I feel about you."

Although drunk, Jimin's mind registers the seriousness of your words and he immediately looks sheepish. "I don't."

Well, that's a lie and both you and Jimin know it.

A sarcastic smile appears on your face. "I'll spell it out for you, again. I like you Jimin."

Jimin looks down and starts fiddling with the end of the bedsheets as he nods, having no other response. 

You sigh, wondering why you expected any other, perhaps a more thoughtful reaction from him. Feeling disappointed with yourself, you make your way out without another word.

On your way, however, you make sure to find Jungkook and ask him to look after Jimin. 

Once you're out of the frat house and have booked a cab to your rented apartment, you sit on a small bench and take a deep inhale to relax. Sadly and much to your frustration, the emotions that have come to the surface refuse to let you have your peace of mind.

You really should have stayed away from Jimin, from the very start.

Your brain chimes at you and it reminds you that perhaps there's no one else to be blamed but you. You are the one who has been entertaining Jimin all in the name of not entertaining him. 

It was a frat party much similar to that of today's when Jimin had first tried to add your name to the long list of girls he has had sex with. You were surprised, caught off guard and admittedly a little flattered by his flirtatious actions but irrespective of that, you weren't willing to be a part of his list.

You had asked him to fuck off and to leave you alone. Which he had done at the time but only to return later with much more determination to win you over. By then, you weren't feeling flattered by his repeated attempts, you were annoyed. Something, which Jimin found amusing.

The more he tried, the more your annoyance flared and so did Jimin's amusement. It went like this for a couple of weeks.

Things started to change when you stumbled upon a drunk Jimin sitting alone on the terrace. That was the first time the both of you had a proper conversation with each other. It made you realise that the whole fuckboy thing he has going on, is only a small part of him. You realised that there's much more to the guy than what meets the eye.

From then on you stopped treating him like a guy whose sole identity was that of the 'campus fuckboy'. 

That doesn't mean that his actions stopped annoying you. But you sure found it more tolerable.

However, exactly when your feelings for him turned romantic, remains debatable. Was it the night when he drunkenly kissed you? Or was it when he drunkenly confessed that he enjoys your company more than anyone else's? You don't know. 

But you do remember, exactly when you realised that your feelings for him don't fall under the category of platonic. It was when you saw Jimin making out with a petite blonde in a bar. The pain and jealousy that shot through your veins was an indication enough for you to see how your feelings have bloomed into something more.

You, upon realising, did not hesitate to confess. His response to your confession was simple. He does not do relationships and he sees you as a friend.

You could do with that. You weren't expecting Jimin to return your feelings or to commit to you. After all, you were well aware of his lifestyle and how he likes having lovers instead of a lover. 

The only reason you had confessed to him was in hopes that he would stop trying to bed you and realise that it isn't just fun and games for you anymore.

Unfortunately, Jimin didn't stop with his antics.

Annoyed and angry, you had decided to cut Jimin off. But of course, he wouldn't have that. He would, in some way or the other, sneak into your daily life and cause a ruckus as if it were his birthright. 

Truth be told, you weren't hurt by his rejection as much as you were by his total disregard for your feelings and how his actions and choices could affect you. 

The events from today serve as another example of the kind of emotional turmoil he stirs within you. The question is how long will you put up with this?

Your cab honks to announce its arrival and it causes you to break out of your thoughts. You give a small nod to the man in the driving seat and get up. As you walk towards the cab, you make up your mind. 

You're not going to entertain him any longer. 

Kim Taehyung

You: that's very mean of you 👿

You type with a wide grin plastered on your face.

Tae 🐻: mean? me? Never 🥺

You: putting that emoji won't help you 👿

Tae 🐻: ☹️

Tae 🐻: I sent you the snap of the chocolate because it reminded me of you 😔

You: that was NOT your intention 😤

You: you do this every time and then i start craving chocolates 😭

Tae 🐻: then have some 🙇

You: i have to complete the excel sheet by today :(:

You: which mean i can't go out

You: and if I opt for ordering online, I'll end up ordering a bunch of other stuff along with it and that won't be good for my wallet 

Tae 🐻: awwww

Tae 🐻: It's okay! I'll bring you chocolates tomorrow 

Tae 🐻: from your favourite brand 😉

You: you sweetheart 🥺

Tae 🐻: says the sweetest ❤️

A bashful giggle escapes from your lips when you read his text. He sure has a way with words.

You: now let me do my work

You: shoo

Tae: ☹️

Tae: I'm being chased away 

Tae: but okay xD

Tae: I'll let you get back to it. 

You bite on your lower lip to stop smiling like a fool and try to focus your attention on the computer screen. Keyword; try.

The butterflies in your stomach and the fluttering of your heart make it extremely difficult for you to think about anything else that's not Taehyung.

Gosh, he really is the greatest distraction of them all.

--------------------------------------------------------------

The next day, you find a big pack of chocolate from your favourite brand, on your desk. Attached to it is a note that reads for my favourite girl ;). You smile involuntarily and wonder what you ever did to deserve someone like Taehyung in your life. 

You sit on your chair and while the computer boots, you take a small bite from the chocolate bar. As you relish the sweetness that spreads in your mouth, you can't help but think of Taehyung and how much he has come to mean to you, in the few months that you have known him. 

When he first joined the company he was shy, barely talking to anyone and having a hard time socialising with his co-workers. It took him about a couple of weeks to get comfortable and once he did, there was no going back. He somehow became everyone's favourite. 

However, the way you two became friends is a bit different. 

Four months ago, on a fortunate day, there was a huge mishap with the data files. Small groups were formed to work on the mistakes and correct them as necessary. As fate would have it, you and Taehyung were a team. And the amount of jokes you two made about your higher-ups, were perhaps the only source of energy for you both to carry on with the work and ultimately, finish it. 

And those three intense working days were enough for the two of you to become friends. 

It started with having small conversations via text, which then turned into full lengthy regular conversations. In the midst of all of that, when the flirting began, you have no clue. All you remember are those nights when you stayed up late, talking to him and smiling into your pillow, feeling like a teenager. 

He would sneak little compliments and warm affectionate words that would have you looking like a tomato in a matter of seconds.

Most importantly, he has become one of your closest friends. He has been there whenever you needed him and has confided in you whenever he faced challenges. The bond you two share is something you treasure deeply. He has become such an integral part of your life that there hardly goes by a day when the two of you don't talk to each other.

It's one of those 'more than friends' but 'not really dating' scenarios.

You had never given much thought about giving a label to what the two of you were. You were happy having him the way you do. But recently, you can't help but think of taking things to the next level. You find yourself wondering what it would be like to call him your boyfriend. 

As the all too familiar windows tune plays, notifying you of the booting process being completed, you decide to subtly ask him about it. 

----------------------------------------

"Did you like the chocolates?" That's the first thing Taehyung asks as you take the seat opposite to him.

"Do you think I would not like it?" You answer his question with a question of your own. Because honestly, that's a very silly question to ask. Anyone who knows you knows how much you love chocolates.

Taehyung grins, his boxy smile making an appearance. "I mean, it would still be nice to hear it from you."

"Well, then, I loved it." 

He nods, satisfied with your answer. Placing one of his hands on his chest, right above his heart, he bows. "I'm honoured to know that."

You chuckle softly, endeared at his actions. "How was your day so far?"

He rolls his eyes. "Eh, the usual. Mina got some files messed up and I had to do twice the work to fix that."

"That sucks," you grimace. "Work has been so tiring lately, I wish we could take a small break from all this shit."

"Oh, that reminds me–" Taehyung exclaims suddenly, startling you, "–I have got these free tickets to a movie, would you like to go with me?"

Excitement bubbles in your stomach. "Sure! I'd love to."

"Then it's set! I'll let you know of the date and time later, okay?" 

You nod, feeling giddy at the thought of watching a movie with him. It won't be the first time for sure, but it has been a while since the two of you last did something like this. Work hardly leaves any spare time for rest and fun.

However, the thought of spending some alone time with him, makes your mind go back to what you had decided while you were devouring the chocolate. You clear your throat before bringing the topic to the table. "Tae?"

"Hmm?"

"What are we doing?"

He looks up from his food, with a confused smile. "What do you mean by that? We are eating lunch." 

You shake your head softly, and make your question more obvious. "What are we?" 

You see as his confusion clears out and his smile fades. A look of discomfort appears on his face as he swallows the food. "Well, we are friends." 

"Are we just friends though?" You raise a brow in question, not willing to accept his answer. 

A soft sigh escapes his lips when he realises he can't really back out of this or push the conversation away for some time later. "You aren't just a friend to me. I like you. I like you a lot."

You stay quiet, sensing that there's a but coming. 

"But I don't think I'm ready to be in a relationship." He adds, figuring out that there's no way to put it subtly. 

That wasn't the answer you were expecting and naturally, you feel disheartened by his words.

Taehyung notices the way your face has dropped and he immediately feels guilty. "I know I should have told you this before. My intentions weren't to string you along, I genuinely do like you–"

"Then why?" You cut him off, confused and unable to understand what could be the issue if he really likes you the way he claims to.

"I am scared it will distract me from my career."

Your first instinct is to counter his statement and say, it doesn't work that way. That relationships are not a distraction. But you hold yourself back from saying so. 

If he believes that having a relationship will distract him, you cannot force or persuade him to believe otherwise. If anything, you understand where he might be coming from. He has only recently joined the company and you know he has experienced financial issues while growing up. You can see why he might be scared of something making him lose his focus. Having an established career is what he wants and what seems to be his priority.

Although you have been hoping and looking forward to putting a label, you know you can't expect that from him anymore. You could try and ask him to reconsider his choices but what good would that do? 

Even if he were to get into a relationship, he would most likely still have that thought in the back of his mind and will keep worrying about getting sidetracked. What's the point of committing to someone if you can't really enjoy it to the fullest? What is the point of calling someone yours, if you can't fully feel the beauty of it? You see none.

"Maybe, we can wait for each other?" He suggests meekly, too scared to see what your reaction to the question is.

Now, waiting for each other and whatnot sounds really romantic in movies and romcoms but you have to remind yourself that this is not a movie. In real life, irrespective of the intentions the individuals may hold, somewhere along the line, something usually happens that causes chaos and turns things sour. 

"How about we just let things flow and see where it takes us?" You suggest as that seems like the best possible choice at the moment.

Taehyung nods knowing he's in no place to bargain. He will take whatever you will give him. However, it bugs him to no end when you spend the rest of the lunch in silence and with a frown on your face.

Jeon Jungkook

"Can you sit still for a moment?"

The person in question, aka Jungkook, pays no attention to your words and hollers when something exciting occurs on the screen of his mobile phone. 

You sigh and place your palms on both of his cheeks and make him look up. However, the adorable sight of his squished cheeks, pouty lips and doe eyes wide in surprise, has you snorting. When you let go of your hold, he frowns, offended by your laughter.

"What's so funny about my face?" He grumbles.

You shake your head and apply blush on his cheeks. "You just looked like a real bunny for a second there, couldn't help but laugh at that."

He pouts. "That's supposed to be cute, not funny."

A fond smile appears on your face at his displeasure. "You're both cute and funny, I guess."

Jungkook grins at you, now satisfied. "Now make me cuter."

"I'll be able to do that if you stay still for a moment," you retort. 

Jungkook huffs and closes his eyes. "Fine! I'll stay still."

You hum in response and get to work. 

Being Jungkook's make-up artist was fairly easy. You just had to make his beautiful face appear flawless for the cameras. Nothing too difficult. Jungkook was friendly and so were the other BTS members. The pay was, of course, more than satisfactory.

Recently, however, being Jungkook's make-up artist hasn't been easy. It hasn't been easy being this close to him and keeping the fluttering of your heart under control. It hasn't been easy to see his eyes this up close and not let yourself get lost in them. It hasn't been easy to notice that small mole under his lips and resist the urge to kiss it. Oh no, it hasn't been easy at all. 

One might call you unprofessional and to be honest, you don't have much to defend yourself with. Rather, if someone questions your professionalism, you'd challenge them to take your job and not fall for the guy.

You think it's simply impossible.

But you see, that's the simple part. Falling. The consequences of falling, however, are where the complications begin. 

The very first question that comes to mind is; what are the chances that they might feel the same? Then one realises that there's no way to answer this for sure as it's only the other person who's aware of what they feel. Which leads to a major dilemma; to confess or not to confess. 

Confessing your feelings is a very vulnerable thing to do. It feels like exposing yourself at one's mercy. Like a delicate bud that you hand over and whether the flower will bloom or wilt, totally depends on the other person. 

It's beautiful yet scary.

For a long time, you haven't been willing to be that vulnerable with Jungkook.

All anxieties that come with confessing aside, you can't ignore the fact that he's a world-famous idol.

You are not worried about word getting out about you falling for him. You hardly think that it will cause a stir. If anything, the fans will probably make memes out of it and will agree with you on how impossible it is to not fall for the guy. The memes will be all over the internet for a few months and after that, they will be gone and will resurface every once in a while. That doesn't seem like much to you and you think you can handle it.

What does worry you is word getting out and you getting fired and not getting a job henceforth (you're pretty sure that the agencies won't take up on your 'don't fall for Jungkook' challenge). 

This particular fear is what has been holding you back from letting Jungkook know of your feelings. 

However, the thing with love is, you cannot bury it no matter how hard you try. It's like the sun that comes out to shine no matter what. Love blooms in the heart and it refuses to stay hidden for too long behind whatever fears the mind comes up with.

After all, in the battle of mind and heart, when has the former ever won? 

Once you're done with the finishing touches, you let Jungkook know that you're done.

Jungkook opens his eyes and they automatically land on yours. The sharp spike in your breathing rate and the loud thumping of your heartbeat, makes you look away immediately.

You clear your throat and take a slow deep inhale to calm your racing heart. "I'll put the lip balm and foundation in the kit. Just in case you need it."

"You say that every time before a performance as if you're not going to be backstage," he chuckles in amusement.

"Jungkook, the performance is in fifteen," Taehyung says loudly from the other side of the room.

It's like a switch being flipped on. Jungkook's eyes widen and he gets up from his seat instantly. Bidding you a quick goodbye, he exits the room in a hurry. 

You sigh in relief, finally feeling like you can breathe again. Taking a seat on the chair previously occupied by Jungkook, you stare at your reflection in the mirror. You notice the red hue on your cheeks and your lips part in awe at how flustered you look. Almost, as if you have run a mile. 

Something about this moment makes you come to a quick decision. For a long time, you have been toying with the idea of confessing but have always backed out every time you had a chance. But not anymore. 

You grab a small piece of paper and a pen and write down what you have been wanting to tell Jungkook.

You make it direct and simple and put it in Jungkook's handbag. 

The moment you zip the chain, you feel this urge to take the chit out and throw it in the dustbin but you somehow, withhold yourself from doing so. 

You are aware that he won't notice the chit until he's back in his dorms. The bag contains all the skin care products (handpicked by you) he uses before going to bed. Which also means you would have to wait until tomorrow when you're back to work to know Jungkook's answer. 

Seems like it's gonna be a sleepless night for you.

----------------------------------------------------------------

The next day, you go to work with nervous excitement. While in the car, you couldn't wait for your destination to arrive yet at the same time dreaded it. It's this mixed feeling where you can't decide what you want but in the end, realise that it's better to just get over it.

However, while you're walking towards Jungkook's make-up room, Namjoon calls your name.

"Y/N," he shouts to get your attention. Once he notices he has it, he walks up to you. "My dressing room is the other way." 

"I know that," you say with a small frown, wondering why he is telling you this.

"Oh," Namjoon realises that you're unaware of the changes. "You don't know, do you?"

You shake your head, your confusion only increasing. "Know what?"

"Jungkook has requested a new make-up artist. So now, you're in charge of my make up," he replies. 

Namjoon's words ring in your ears and you feel the world around you fade. You knew that there was always the chance that he doesn't feel the same way. You knew if that were the case it'd hurt but you'd accept it. However, you didn't expect Jungkook to do this. 

It feels like the unbloomed flower has been stomped by someone and you're left to feel the crushing pain. 

A/N: if you wish to support me and want to have early access to all my works, consider visiting my patreon!

[yanderes-stuff]

Yandere Johnathon Ohnn x Scientist Reader

(Forgive me if this sucks. I have a sinus infection and can barely focus but I need to dump my brain.)

Johnathon worked at Alchemax long before you did, to him it was just another day of tedious work. Then he heard rumors of a new worker coming, it was nothing too uncommon in the laboratory though.

Then he actually got to meet you, he had to approach you while you were doing papers. He couldn't help but notice how soft your expression was; everybody else seemed so tense and yet you just seemed happy to be there. He really… really liked that.

He couldn't help but watch you from afar whenever Livv was not hovering over his shoulder attempting to finish his project. He remembers having guards shoo him away whenever he came to visit you when you had overtime. You had your head down peacefully on a desk of messy papers, you seemed so tired… He really would've grabbed you a blanket if he had gotten the chance.

Sooner or later he begins to realize his fascination with you is more than it seems, Ohnn never really understood his emotions but he could tell you already had a special place in his mind. 

He eventually becomes a bit stalkerish. Watching you from a window whenever you clock out of work. He had to make sure you were safe, and just generally kept an eye on you. But the more your friend group grows the more jealousy he feels.

Ohnn was very easily jealous of others, he never felt satisfied with what little he had. He always felt the need to do more. The need to prove himself; And it seemed like he was finally understanding that you might be an opportunity for that.

Finally, he gathers the courage to talk to you, it was just a normal break when Ohnn nervously approached you. His awkward frame loomed over you as he held a cup of coffee gently in his clammy palms. But what struck him as odd was the fact you treated him… normally, there wasn't even a trace of discomfort on your face despite Ohnn being deemed a freak by your coworkers, your friends.

Talking to you was addicting, he slowly started to insert himself whenever he got the chance when you were alone. At first, you were flattered such an astounding scientist wanted to speak to you. But you were quickly getting distracted by him, It wasn't anything personal it was just. Between your friends, your work, and him. There was no room left for him.

His jealousy was quickly growing, he felt cast aside. Though it wasn't completely your fault, no no no. It was your friend's fault, it was your boss's fault. They were making it more difficult for him to form anything meaningful with you. 

He would begin to make little gifts for you, leaving you a little homemade lunch instead of the usual cafeteria food. (which surprisingly tasted good for somebody whose diet was mostly takeout and energy drinks.) And he'd leave little love notes on your desk.

He watched in joy as you ate his lunch, and how your feet kicked for a moment reading his rather unprofessional romantic notes.

But what made him regret those little actions was the fact he was too scared to sign it. A co-worker took credit for his gifts! Both of them had similar handwriting… and of course, somebody else would have a thing for you, ugh.

He considered confessing it was him and that your co-worker was a liar. But at this point, his image was already ruined, he was considered bizarre before you came. And it only grew every day, especially with the new rumors of him being a stalker. But that didn't even agitate him, it was observing your new love flirt and spend time together. 

He only had one other option now, and seeing how things seemed at the moment he'd need to act fast before his emotions made him do something even more drastic. 

He came in early like usual, you usually came shortly after. He could tell you were trying to climb the Alchemax ladder and he couldn't help but admire that. It also gave him a chance to fulfill his plan, so he approached you. Explained that he had a discovery he wanted to show you. The excitement you held in your face was adorable, and he led you into his room and closed the door behind him.

As soon as you stepped inside, looking around searching for his discovery, he wrapped his forearm around your throat. Squeezing your body against him as he placed his palms roughly against your mouth. Your screams were muffled as you thrashed, Ohnn wasn't strong by any means but he was around 6'5. And in the choke hold he had you in there was a slim chance of breaking free. He held you there while muttering apologies and trying to comfort you, expressing that he wasn't going to hurt you. As long as you didn't make him.

You eventually passed out in his arms, how adorable! Now it was time to actually show you his discovery…

There was a portal he kept hidden in his personal laboratory, he explored it himself. Memorizing the terrain. And now that he had you to himself, it seemed like you and him were going to explore the multiverse together… Finally, everything that has been distracting you will be put behind you. 

He was going to find a way to make you dependent on him, so don't try to resist him please… it'll only make you hurt, and he doesn't like hurting you. But he's not above it either for more control~

[caparrucia]

Hi there! Few days ago my brain randomly reminded me of Kingsglaive and hours later I ended up scrolling ao3 looking for fics that feature Nyx, any fic, hoping there're more fics for him than the last time i checked (years ago, i think?) and surprised there's a Cor and Nyx ship??? I mean... HOW? And why? But somehow I spent past three days reading your Cor/Nyx fic in ao3. Started with your "flower soulmates AU", classic trope, figured it'd be hard to go wrong with that. First sentence intrigued me, 8000 words later I was whisked away by the imagery, feelings and humor also a bit wistfulness sometimes. And then "glitter and gold". And then "the sun is out, the day is new" It was a JOY to read it! (holding back to read "always darkest before dawn" because, was it discontinued?) Your worldbuilding of Galahd culture (the Walk! the. WALK) it just fills this pockets of imagination for all these cultural aspects we’ve only got tiny glimpsed before. Your words pulled me in and now I am well and truly hooked on this ship hahaha. Just wanna say you're amazingly talented (superpower with words I swear) and thank you for writing about Nyx. 💜

So, first of all, thank you for your kind words and welcome to the CorNyx fandom, it's cozy and fun!

I do want to say I am not and have never claimed to be patient zero for the CorNyx ship, but I did write a fic specifically to infect as many people as possible with my ship because... you know. I'm a writer, that's what I do. :P

Why Cor and Nyx? To me personally because I watched Kingsglaive, watched the speech Nyx gave the Lucii and went "huh, so he's just Cor but younger" and that thought immediately spawned a need to see these two butting heads (and other things!) ASAP. Cor is my darling boy, mostly because he's a shonen action hero that grew up, and he's forty fucking five years old and still wears red sole shoes and three shirts layered like it's cool. He's a moron, I love him.

Nyx is Nyx! Kingsglaive spent so long painting a picture of an interesting main character shafted into side character status - a thing that XV does a lot, in that the bros are all flavor of Main Character, while Noctis is very much refusing the call at every step he can - and I'm so very fond of him.

So hey, let's write a story to chew on the idea and see if I can convince people to ship it. The story was the sun is out, the day is new, and the answer was overwhelmingly yes! And so here we are. XD

always darkest before dawn is and isn't abandoned, in the sense that I realized I needed to rewrite some bits and I might as well scrap it all and rewrite it from scratch but that takes time and I've been drowning in work and getting swallowed by other fandoms in the meantime so it's been a while. I need to get to it because I need people to know what's the deal with Prompto, because it's so good. SO GOOD. I love my boy.

glitter and gold exists purely because of the awesome @garbria, and if you want some quality CorNyx, well. /Will Smith memes. She's got you covered, trust me. /chef kiss

And if you've still got a hungering for more CorNyx from me, I know it's still on going and truth is I update once a year at this rate, but it is my baby and I try my best not to post cliffhangers (or to resolve them quickly, lmao) but you might want to give nature of the beast a try. It's got teeth, for all it's very soft and squishy in its own way.

[lone3321]

CW: Eyestrain,

Thing I made. she/it/any for the chracter.

Yes its fucking Wenda from Sprunki (Help me I am stuck in this hole now) and is vaguely inspired by this version of her from this one Sprunki mod (https://www.cocrea.world/@Feoletik/Incredibox-SingularityPLUS-NEWV4)

Yes I've achieved true cringe, thank you. Anyway the bigger, greater overarching idea aside from making a comfort oc/hc out of fucking Sprunki Wenda is that like:

Ok so after Black (What great names these characters have) fucks everything up, the universe becomes unstable and it goes "Nuh uh" and tears itself apart. Bunch of the other fellas get duplicated and mutilated and whatnot. Now one of Wenda's duplicates becomes a god like entity that has some manner of control over this in-between purgatory hell. So now she feels guilty for the things she did and wants to set things right and help everyone. Like she is kooky, basically insane and probably obsessive but like, her ass just wants to help everyone and be everyone's friend now.

Probably the only morally questionable thing she's been up to in this form is her preventing the other sprunkis from just outright dying. Like I imagine some of the mutilations/transformations some of the other sprunkis underwent would have realistically killed them in some manner (Idk Durple (what a name) gets infected by some death parasite and every time it takes over fully Wenda just resets him). And like its very morally questionable, but she just doesn't want her friends to die, and also goes through the effort of lessening their suffering as much as possible. This applies to any new sprunkis that appeared because "Fucked up shit happening as a result of reality breaking" and any duplicates of existing ones. Even if they are not even the same person anymore, Wenda wants to help and be everyone's friend. Even fucking Black, who ruined everything and caused this, Wenda just up and forgives him (which I imagine makes him want to curl up and die internally, given I also see him being powerless now).

And aside from keeping everyone alive, being everyone's friend, and lessening everyone's suffering, its main goal is to try and remake/go into a more stable reality. What a nice and fucking crazy person she is.

Anyway thanks Sprunki for frying my brain, and thanks to that mod I mentioned for being so damn cool.

Note: All the text around it is just it speaking. She speaks very quickly, repeats herself a lot and is very glitchy and weird.

And yes, this oc/hc(Fuck you I can steal any character and turn them into an oc hehehhe) primarily came because I needed a comfort character/imaginary friend to keep me sane. And yes having her be insane and obsessive does help. Does this qualify as vent art? Idfk, go have a snack and a cup of tea instead of wondering that.

Sprunki had a strange effect on me. I don't consider myself part of the fandom though, ik what a strange fact.

[emmy-dekarios-bg3]

Heart of the Weave - chapter 4

A faint yet loud voice outside the front door can be heard, and I begin to think: there’s no way they’re here already?! The sooner the better I suppose! Gale and I press our ears to the door, wondering if it’s who we think it is. The voice is rather familiar; too familiar, in fact.

“You mean to tell me there’s not anywhere to buy Whizbangs in Waterdeep? COME ON!!” Ah, yes. Karlach. Karlach is our funny, enthusiastic Tiefling friend who had an engine for a heart. She was also on the nautiloid and infected with one of those parasites within the ocular region. Her story is that she was basically sold to Avernus – or, Hell – by someone she once trusted. His name was Gortash and he was one of the bastards we had to kill in Baldur’s Gate. His evil political influence and desire to dominate the world was nauseating and unbearable, so we had to do what we had to do. Plus, Karlach got her revenge. He should not have sold her to Hell to serve for an archdevil. She went back to Avernus with Wyll, the Blade of Avernus, so they could fight together and keep her alive. Her engine would not allow her to live much outside of the Hells.

Gale opens the door and there stands three of our loyal, badass friends on the castle porch: Shadowheart, Karlach, and Wyll. It appears Liezel is still in the Astral Planes, and who knows what happened to Astarion, Halsin, and Jaheira? I start to wonder what happened to our other loving friends who started new lives elsewhere.

“Holy shit! It’s Gale! Wait, is that Emmy behind you?! How’d you know we were here?” Karlach says enthusiastically, looking as if she’s ready to punch an object out of pure excitement.

“Well, you do know we’re married, do you not?” Gale asks her with a smirk painted upon his face. I can’t help but laugh at his remark, because she was at our wedding. “Besides, we knew you were here because there’s only one person – er, tiefling – we know that gets this excited about whizbangs.”

“Damn pal. You got me.”

“Karlach and I found a forge in Avernus to fix her heart. We’re so excited to adventure with you guys again, as long as no ‘Chosen Three’ or ‘elder brain’ gets involved again,” Wyll says, wrapping his arm around Karlach’s waist. I smile, wishing I could jump up and down in ecstasy from this news, though I’m dead set on the idea that I’ll vomit everywhere. I already feel a knot curl up within my stomach.

“Karlach! That’s…amazing news. Can I hug you?” I ask her, trying to maintain my excitement.

“Of course, soldier!” I hug Karlach, feeling her strong arms embrace me in return for over a minute. No flames are rising from her body anymore, nor does she even feel hot. She’s considered my best friend and I’m more than thrilled that she’s going to be okay outside of Avernus, but more relieved she no longer has to suffer. I am more than thankful we saved her life in time when she was about to explode from her old engine. I can’t imagine missing Karlach and begging for her to be alive.

“I have arrived! Oh, it’s so good to see everyone again. Well, most of you. I imagine we’ll bump into Astarion on the road, should he be able to find us in the darkness,” Shadowheart chimes in enthusiastically, her white hair shimmering in the sunlight. . I hug her as well, and she immediately begins to feel the heat of my skin from the fever. “You really aren’t feeling great, are you? You are burning up. Let’s leave as quickly as possible.”

“I have dealt with being poisoned, burned, frozen… I really think I’ll be okay,” I say. Now that I think about it, it’s wild. Everyone is so concerned about me, considering I have dealt with much worse in the past, nearly meeting my death bed on multiple occasions. Then again, we just need confirmation this isn’t the tadpole again at least. Gale takes my hand, holding it gently and rubbing my knuckles with his thumb. Judging by the look on his face, it looks like he is praying to some Goddess or God silently.

“I’ve prayed to Sêlune. I bet it’s just a bug, but let’s go just in case,” Shadowheart responds, giving off a fake smile. “You never know what this could turn into.” Her and I grew very close on our adventures, to the point she’s gotten super protective over me. I was with her when her parents passed. She once told me I am the only person she has left, and ever since those words escaped her lips, I’ve considered her family to me. I can’t imagine how it’s been for her, traveling alone and discovering the world without a companion by her side. I’m sure it gets rather lonely.

“Well, we probably should leave now. The quicker we leave, the better,” I say. “Don’t worry, I set out enough food for Tara to indulge in while we’re gone.”

“Good news on that front, Tara knows how to pluck vegetables from the garden, so she’ll be okay regardless,” Gale says. “Off we go.”

I close the door behind us and we head on the road in Waterdeep that leads to Baldur’s Gate, though it will be awhile before we actually get there. The fresh air outside seems to make me feel more refreshed than before somehow. The beautiful petunias growing on the side of the road, the large yet beautiful pieces of architecture in the city, such as museums and the Academy, and of course the cute little markets where people are making a living… It’s all so pleasing to the eye.

“So, how have you guys been?” I ask Karlach. “I see you and Wyll are together at last! I knew it would happen someday.”

“You are correct! We’re engaged, actually. No set date for the wedding. Wyll proposed to me in Avernus right after slaying the head off of a giant. Nothing more romantic than that.”

“I was going to have it be a traditional engagement, but alas this was before we could fix her engine, so I had to do it in Avernus. I didn’t want to wait,” Wyll says with animation in his voice, almost like how Karlach sounds every time she talks. It actually makes me so happy they ended up together. It’s funny how they were once enemies, threatening to murder one another, and now they’re engaged to be married. They grow up so fast.

“Well, congrats you two!”

“Don’t worry, Emmy. You’re definitely invited to the wedding. You too, Gale and Shadowheart. Don’t think we’d leave you out either.”

“Thank you, Wyll. That’s appreciated,” Shadowheart says. “Ah, I love weddings. I’m so glad I was able to be the maid of honor at Emmy and Gale’s wedding, it was absolutely stunning. I’d relive that day if I could.”

“Oh trust me, so could I,” Gale says, holding my hand within his as we walk the quiet roads of Waterdeep. It feels nice to catch up with my friends that I haven’t seen since the reunion party five – or maybe six – months ago. It feels much longer than that.

Another sudden wave of severe nausea hits me like a freight train, causing me to stop walking for a moment. This time, it’s gut-wrenching and nearly painful, possibly the worst it’s been in awhile.

“Whoa, is everything alright?” Gale asks, rubbing my back as I’m hunched over. “It’s okay. Do what you need to do.”

“Whatever is causing you to feel this way, I’m going to punch it in the fucking head,” Karlach says. “Unless it’s a baby. I would expect this if you came across Cloudkill or something atrocious like that. Have you been around any disgusting spells like that recently?” My eyes, as well as Gale’s, open up in pure shock. “Wait, did I say anything wrong? Whoops.”

“Not at all,” I mumble. “I think it’s a stomach bug, but…much worse.”

“I feel like a failure. I’ve failed you. I’m a wizard who has studied the arcane since I was young, yet I can’t heal or cure you whatsoever,” Gale says, sighing as he continues to rub my back. “I’m so sorry.”

“That’s just the thing,” Shadowheart chimes in. “Magic may not be able to help her at all. At least not this time.” I take a deep breath and close my eyes, trying to fight off the sickness that’s overwhelming my body. So going by Shadowheart's words, magic can only help in certain conditions? I have so much I still need to understand; I should have studied the arcane growing up. However, my natural desire was to help others, cure those in pain, and bring light into the sinister world of darkness. It seems I can’t help myself unfortunately.

“I’ll be okay. I have waves where I feel totally fine, though most of the time I think I’ll throw up. In fact, I have at least six times today.” In Faerȗn, illnesses are surprisingly rare due to the magic and healing spells that cure just about anything. If there is no spell, there’s surely a potion for it. Either way, magic has not been able to cure whatever this atrocity is.

After my insane episode of sickness, I finally feel a little better after about twenty minutes and we continue forward on our adventure. The scent of spearmint in the wild somewhere relieves me, and I feel somewhat normal again – thank the stars.

“So Shadowheart, how have you been?” Gale asks. “I’m sure it’s been a wild ride exploring the depths of every mountain, city, and forest you can possibly imagine.”

“You know, as much as I enjoy it and find new places to discover… It gets lonely. However, I’m faring quite well. But, good news on that front, I found a place in Waterdeep and moved here a couple days ago. I’ll be slowing down on my adventures for a while,” she says, inhaling the forest air. “I’m glad I will be around some familiar faces.” This just made my entire day, knowing Shadowheart lives close to us and I’ll have someone to hang out with while Gale is teaching at the Academy. Finally, adult interaction!

As we all continue to walk the long and familiar dirt path to Baldur’s Gate, I notice glossy splotches of newly shed blood on some large rocks just a few feet away from us, remembering all the lives I took. Granted, they were well deserved, but nonetheless it affects me sometimes. Just because they were warranted doesn’t mean I’m not affected. Someone or something just got murdered here within the last hour or two. I sigh, trying not to focus too hard on the blood splatters around us. After a moment, I began to smile, realizing how many lives we ended up saving and that we were the heroes of Baldur’s Gate. We still are. All of the violence toward the evil beings was worth it, though I do question myself every now and again.

“Are you alright, baby?” Gale asks. His voice is so soft like a lullaby. If only it were a cure for my unfortunate illness.

“Yes, I’m more than alright.” Part of me is so excited to get to the city. Maybe I’ll see some familiar faces, and hopefully I’ll get the answers I’m looking for.

[unbossed]

Sorry about the self-reblog barrage earlier. I’m kinda brain-fogged and got stuck in a pattern. I finally tested positive for covid and it hit pretty hard earlier. It’s kinda coming and going and I’m in a mostly lucid state right now.

My de facto mother-in-law is the type who’d hide a zombie bite and she’s so determined for us to move back down near her that she showed up at our next place on Wednesday to help us unload some things we took down that day. She was acting strangely and claimed that she had to get home quickly because she’d supposedly eaten some bad walnuts and her stomach was bothering her. On phone calls between then and yesterday she mentioned that she “hadn’t been feeling well.”

@v8pontiacgirl had pretty bad symptoms start early yesterday so she tested herself and confirmed with a second and both were positive. Her mom was the only person we’ve been in close-ish contact with in almost 2 weeks so she was the only likely vector. She’s both the “nothing bad happens to people who are right with the Lord” and “everything works out for the best eventually” type so she was in severe denial that it was covid. My partner finally convinced her to test herself and she kept claiming that she was fine but that “something went wrong” with multiple tests. It turns out, as she finally admitted this evening, that the something wrong was that she kept getting positive results.

After several hours of multiple phone conversations today she also finally admitted that she had been sick enough on Wednesday that she’d had to force herself to come meet up with us, for all of 15 or 20 minutes. She has bad knees that make it difficult for her to carry anything of significance so her presence to help unload was absolutely pointless. “I just wanted to see you so badly,” she told my partner, despite the fact that we were scheduled, with a truck reserved even, to move fucking yesterday. This is the same woman who wouldn’t take her own daughter to the doctor for things like ear infections as a child because it was so expensive, so none of this but the audacity is particularly surprising.

We had planned for her and her husband to come up yesterday to help, with him driving the U-Haul to the new place, me driving our farm truck, my partner driving her dad’s truck (both of us hauling our ducks and chickens), and her mom following in my partner’s car. As late as yesterday morning she was still planning to do that but mentioned that she would need to take breaks on the drive back because she’s “been pretty tired lately.”

When my partner tested positive on Saturday morning this woman kept trying to convince her that the tests were wrong and that we should stick to the plan. She even expressed disappointment that we’d cancelled the truck. The real shit of it is that she fucking knows that her daughter has multiple chronic health conditions and is at increased risk and that she finally admitted to being virtually bed-ridden even before Wednesday. She “just couldn’t wait until [v8pontiacgirl is] close enough for me to show up unannounced at any time of day to visit again.”

She’s never been the type to take others’ medical and health concerns seriously and that could very possibly kill someone. But, you know, if she does it will just be “according to God’s plan.” FFS these people are a threat.

[pro-penlicker]

taking a break from thinking about the hamster to bring you this.

siblings help return a prince to his homeland but the brother and prince fall in love along the way

names (their temp) prince - Saffron brother - Camille sister - Heather

Early Days

Saffron was found in the forest by the siblings' aunt. The aunt was confused and concerned about how a small child ended up in the woods all alone. She quickly took the child in, intending on dropping him off at her sister's place since the aunt had no clue on how to raise a child.

it took two years for her to reunite with her sister, dropping the child off and leaving as quickly as she arrived.

The siblings' mother found it difficult to introduce Saffron to her kids, while her daughter, Heather, was shy, her youngest son was even shyer. Heather quickly took to the new kid though, instantly befriending him. It took Camille a long time to warm up to Saffron though. Their mother often had to watch where she was stepping, afraid of tripping over her quiet son.

not to come out of the more writing type of rambling, idk how to explain this next part in a neat and tidy way hehe Camille was slow with warming to Saffron, like couldn't be in the same room as him alone type of slow. Camille didn't like Saffron at all

which in my opinion is hilarious cause of their future dynamics hehe

i think the aunt and mother knew that Saffron was a noble of some kind, or at least not from their region. how did they know he was royalty..? eh??

tbf it'd be a bit too crazy for them to know his actual origins, all they knew is that someone threw the poor kid into the forest and left.

As the kids grew older, so did she, and eventually it was time for her to pass on. It was difficult for the mother to leave her two kids alone but she knew that they would be safe, Saffron deemed himself worthy. Though not worthy enough to bare the family's curse. No... That responsibility belonged to her youngest.

after their mother's death, the siblings decide it's time to follow the path (oohhhh spooky loreeee) and enjoy being independent adults! Saffron comes with them because well, he doesn't have anywhere else to go lmao

The trio eventually find their way out of the woods and enter a abandoned village. Camille doesn't have a good feeling about it.

C: "Maybe we shouldn't enter the rotting buildings?"

H: "You're overreacting Cami, it's perfectly safe! Look some birds are nesting on there"

C: "That's because they weigh nothing"

Sibling banter aside, Camille's worry is validated as Saffron notices something in the distance. He pulls the siblings aside when those somethings, people? approach the village.

Saffron isn't sure if they are actually people or something else but whatever the case. They have to escape, as quickly and quietly as possible. Which is easy when your two best friends are half the size of you.

Oh... There's plot in this rot

i'm really jinxing myself with that tag huh

So Heather's a very light-hearted and often cheerful person. She tries to find the best in everything and everyone even if it means coming off as a little bit... light in the head. I like characters who are goofy lil idiots but will beat shit up if they have the chance... uhhh there's a proper term for that trope, i can't think of it rn.

If Camille's the brain, then Heather is the brawn. and Saffron is there to be sexy.

but yeah, those people-looking things aren't people and are actually manifestations of the corruption, which is the big bad sadge of this story.

the corruption is related to the family curse i mentioned earlier. the curse is currently infecting Camille's left arm and is slowly creeping up his neck. He keeps his left arm bandaged up and often keeps it covered by his cloak. Attempting to keep it a secret from his sister and friend. Though Heather is aware of the family's curse and the fact that her brother is carrying on it's legacy. She isn't aware of how bad it's gotten yet.

Saffron isn't aware of the curse at all. He just knows that Camille is carrying on something precious to the family.

this is the part where i mention that the siblings aren't entirely human.

not really sure of Saffron realizes that he's royalty and more specifically the lost prince of a distant land. probably a tangled moment where he connects all the dots and it's just oh that missing kid he's me

Saffron's homeland is probably in a dire situation. probably infected by the corruption, slowly being consumed by the darkness.

whatever the case Saffron realizes that he needs to go home and help his people.

He considers asking the siblings for help but realizes that by doing that, they'll nolonger follow the path. and he remembers their mother telling them what happens if they don't follow it.

Heather eventually pieces together what's happening as well and decides to help Saffron go home. It doesn't matter if she doesn't follow the path, helping Saffron save his people is more important. and maybe along the way they can find a way to destroy the corruption.

Saffron is happy that Heather is willing to help but he's unsure as to what Camille thinks. Ever since his mother's death, Camille had been acting different. While he still acts the same around Heather, being a worrywart about his older sister, Saffron can tell that there's some kind of barrier keeping him from getting closer to the other man.

why have a normal friendship between guys when you can have childhood friends to whatever the fuck is happening between Saffron and Camille.

i should probably go eat and do my chores, ty for reading this ramble and if you have any questions, your welcome to ask :) i'm gonna jinx myself hard

[mariska]

hi i would like to share a recent personal experience (with a surprisingly positive resolution) about challenging hate speech in online video games that have chat features as an extremely socially anxious autistic person + also some thoughts i've held for a very long time regarding the need for folks who are privileged enough to not be targets of constant harassment in video game social environments to use that privilege by speaking up when witnessing hate speech for those of us who can't safely do so

(this ended up being a super long post i'm sorry, i tried to split it into separated paragraphs to make it a bit more accessible to read but i needed to get this whole train of thought written outside of my brain before i unintentionally move on to some other point of focus and forget all of this)

i dont usually like posting about bad online video game interactions since thats a Bummer, but. i wanted to make a post to share a brief interaction i was a part of in the text chat of an online team game last night that actually had a positive resolution even just for the sake of being able to say that i've witnessed a bad video game interaction involving me as a target end up with a positive resolution. i'm gonna put the rest of this whole thing under a 'read more' so that it hopefully doesn't clog anyone's dash up with long-scrolling text wall:

i was playing 'versus' mode in Left 4 Dead 2 on my computer last night, which for anyone not familiar with that gamemode, is where one team of 4 people play as the human survivors and the other team of 4 people play as the game's 'Special Infected' zombies (Boomer, Hunter, Tank, etc. on a randomized respawn rotation). its very fun and chaotic but because of the chaotic rapid respawn nature of the zombie side and the fact that you don't usually play as the special infected zombies in the regular 'campaign', its not uncommon to be put in matches with ppl who have no patience for anyone who isnt super experienced or skilled or whatever as every special infected on the zombie team and people start arguments in the chat pretty often. im not a fan of ppl acting out like that but usually its just Annoying and i ignore it and carry on,

last night though, someone on the opposite team of mine (mine was currently the zombies; the game goes back and forth to let each team do their best at surviving the same levels on both sides; one team gets as far as they can as humans and then the other tries to match that score or do better if they can and so on) was getting increasingly frustrated that whenever their team was playing as the survivors they weren't quite making it as far towards the map end goals as my team was, because my team was doing slightly better at teaming up as the special infected zombies to get bigger scores and hold them away from their goal.

eventually he got so visibly upset in the text chat that he went "ok. r*tarded but ok', and then followed up quickly with something along the lines of "yall know you're a bunch of fkin r*tards right" (i censored it here, he did not originally) and that immediately crossed a boundary line for me because i'm autistic, and once was already too much, but twice in a row made me very uncomfortable. i didn't know or care if he was saying it to us (his enemy team), or his own team for having a slightly lower score as the survivors, but nobody else in the game had shown any text or voice chat signs of being unsafe people or angry people, so i felt safe enough to go in the text chat (i usually do not do this because i usually do not feel safe enough to do so in groups of strangers online)

i said something like "learn a new word to use, maybe?", just to kind of be like, 'hey, nobody else in this game is talking the way you are, don't be That Guy' you know? he said "why? its not like its a big deal", which was kinda sad to read 'cause it gave me the impression that this person probably spends a good amount of time (willingly or unwillingly) around people who commonly use slurs because its 'not a big deal'; again, nobody else in the match was getting involved verbally or textually, and we all continued to play the game while this happened, so i decided that i was going to stick up for myself since i don't often feel like i have the opportunity to do that in the text chat of games without feeling humiliated or thrown under the bus by my teammates or whatever.

while i was typing the guy added "i wasnt even saying it to you anyways" (does not matter to me, obviously). i finished the response i had been typing to his message about 'its not a big deal' and said "it is a big deal, actually!". by this point, his character had been eliminated entirely and his team had one or two human survivors running to their end goal map exit for the round, so he had more free time to type and he replied to me and said "whatever, you do you i guess". i said "well. i'm autistic, so." and meant to say 'i guess i will' in response to 'you do you', but the round ended after i sent that reply and the loading screen popped up for the survivor/zombie team switch

when it did, he wrote "fair 'nuff." in the chat like a minute or so into the very start of the round when both teams were getting set up and everything, and i was honestly fine with that as a general resolution to the whole thing, because the minute or so of time in between my last message and the non-aggressive bluntness of it made me feel like he probably felt at least a little guilty realizing that he was casually tossing around a slur that is very commonly used against autistic people to An Actual Autistic Person in the same game as him, and that worked for me.

the game went on as it regularly had been for like five or so more minutes, and then he suddenly sent another final and honestly unexpected message in the group chat that said, in no response to any other messages that had been typed by anyone since his last one, "alright i'm sorry i used that word in chat mariska" (my name/username). which was actually wild for me to see because i am very much not used to getting actual apologies from strangers who say bad stuff in game chats, and i genuinely appreciated that he either hadn't stopped thinking about it and felt bad about acting out, or maybe some of his own teammates had prompted him to apologize in their respective team chat or something; either way, i gave a genuine "thank you." in the chat to let him know the gesture was appreciated, and for the rest of the maybe 30 or so mins that the whole match lasted, there was no more aggressiveness or slurs or toxicity at all in the chat from either team's side. when the game ended all together, he was one of the first people to type "gg" (good game) in the chat, as did myself and almost all of the other folks in the match, and after that i stopped playing for the night.

sorry for the big long text post, but i wanted to share this somewhere other than just that isolated game match chat between 8 people, because i very often see a lot of people (on pretty much any social media but mostly on here tbh) make posts regarding this exact kind of video game or general online text chat community experience where the person writing the post encourages others who also commonly witness it, or are the target of slurs, harassment, threats etc, to speak up (if it is safe to do so, imo 'speaking up' or 'calling out' people you dont know especially in aggressive game communities should be the responsibility of allies/friends/non-targeted folks more often than those of us who are being harassed or threatened or talked down to ourselves since it is inherently more dangerous for us to defend ourselves unfortunately and it can take a very serious turn against us very fast, think 'swatting' or doxxing, as a few examples off the top of my head) against the language/slurs/bigotry/harassment that aggressive, angry, frustrated strangers commonly spew in text and/or voice game chats, and as someone who plays a lot of team based online games regularly and has played online games in general since the mid-2000's, i couldn't agree more with the people i've seen writing posts or game journalism articles encouraging people to refuse to allow that kind of behavior to be validated by others in an online match, or to only ignore it when there is a safe opportunity to make it known that at least one person refuses to tolerate whatever behavior the aggressor is displaying.

anyways, to make an accidentally way too long story short; more often than not, in online video game chat circles, it's unfortunately just not going to be super productive to call out casual hate speech & harassment because there are typically (in my personal experiences at least) more people in a group of strangers that either enjoy seeing targets of harassment get upset and will join in with the original aggressor to humiliate whoever speaks against it, or who behave the same way as the aggressor and validate their own patterns of hate speech as being acceptable and common by defending their behavior/siding with them in larger numbers.

but! in situations where you're watching that happen, to yourself or others, and everyone else is either silent or doesn't seem to agree/enjoy watching someone have a bigoted hissy fit in a video game chat, it absolutely can be worth it to be the person who makes it clear to that person that they are the problem. unless you personally know every individual person who is playing in the same match group as you, there is no 100% way to know exactly who all the other players are outside of their characters or personas they're represented by in-game. people who tend to be commonly perceived as pretty emotionally mature in general, in any part of online or offline life, can and do absolutely come across as temporary social role models/behavioral leaders to the other real human beings around them in the moment, regardless of whether that's intentional on their end or not.

i'm not quite sure if the term 'peer pressure' is exactly what i'm looking for as terminology right now since that term is typically applied in negative behavior patterns, but that concept is very real in any gathering of multiple people - it can (and again, in SAFE settings, should) be utilized in a positive, constructive way to prompt someone to think before they speak/type, and to make a point to everyone present in the moment that we are all allowed to openly bring attention to harassment and hate speech. that point is an especially important realization for people who may hold generally higher positions of privilege than those of us who speak against it, since they are the ones that really need to be doing this kind of thing more often and in larger majorities than those of us who are put in danger when we bring attention to hateful behavior simply by existing as oppressed people of any kind.

i guess the whole main train of thought i'm attempting to explain with all of this is, like. before that one person started typing out a slur two times in a row that has been used against me so many times in my life that my brain went into auto-pilot and refused to let him feel comfortable saying it again, nobody was typing anything like 'gg' or 'gr' (good round, when a game isn't totally finished yet) at all, which was fine that's not like a requirement, but when that next round ended after the guy apologized and i said thank you, everyone else started saying 'gr' until the match ended and there were a bunch of 'gg's instead, like i mentioned above.

in all honesty, if i hadn't been so exhausted last night from having a really difficult day earlier that involved a lot of unintentional trauma triggers, panic attacks and anti-anxiety medication, i probably would have just left the game or not said anything when that happened, because i am terrified of confrontation and i am very used to it resulting in bad outcomes for me so i try very hard to have self-control and not potentially feed into trolls online, but i had a really really bad day, and that was my late night comfort special interest activity, and it pissed me off that i couldn't avoid traumatic triggers even in that short distraction before attempting to get some sleep. i was acting totally on emotionally charged impulse which is something that i try so hard not to do with strangers in video games of all places.

but i mention that specifically because it still made a difference in that one match, and because of that we were all able to have fun playing a video game the way it was meant to be played for friendly competitive enjoyment. i will probably never interact or maybe even just run into any of those people in a game lobby again, so obviously there's no way for me to know if the person who typed the slur messages will just continue to do that in other games anyways or if getting called-out on hateful behavior had any kind of impact on how he might think a few seconds longer before saying something like that to strangers online again in the future, but like. i don't know. that's kind of the point, i think? he seemed at the very least pretty embarrassed that nobody wanted to defend him or feed into the whole 'its not a big deal' thing, to the point that he actually apologized appropriately to me directly in a social setting where 6 other people saw it, so maybe that was a feeling of temporary guilt or shame or just being humbled a bit that he needed to experience to learn something from.

some people really are just not worth the mental or emotional effort to respond to because they are so set and fixed in their ways, and they're a stranger, and it's not our responsibility to fix that, especially in video games, that's why i usually. Dont Bother. but also sometimes people are so self-centered or uncaring or maybe even projecting self-hatred of how they think of themselves onto strangers because they don't view those strangers as fully realized human beings that continue living their lives after exiting out of a video game, who knows, i don't and i really don't care to, but i truly think there are a large amount of people in this kind of situation that just repeat whatever they've learned and heard around them for however long, and think of it as 'no big deal', and they suddenly feel very embarrassed and ashamed and small when one of the usernames they view as just a username on a screen talks back and they are faced with the realization that they said something awful to a real person, not an npc, not a left 4 dead 2 zombie character, and the other 6 real people there say nothing to defend them, because what they said sucked, and we're all trying to have fun playing a silly game, and they deserved to be embarrassed about it.

i think that's maybe my Big Concluding Thought on this whole thing. not necessarily 'everyone join me in Bringing Peace And Harmony To Left 4 Dead 2 Online Text Chat', but like...your words mean things to people you don't know when you say things to them in a place like a video game chat, and the largest majority of people playing most games just wanna play the game, so like. maybe think for a second or two before you just say stuff that sucks. especially if it sucks because it is literal hate speech? but also in general when it just sucks because its just a mean unwanted and unhelpful comment. and maybe ask yourself, if you're someone who jokes about wishing you werent 'so toxic when i play but i cant help it' or if you say things just to say things because 'its no big deal', why? why are you like that? you literally do not have to be. you don't know the lives and experiences of the people you're spending a very small amount of time with together in a game online and when you do this kind of stuff, when you're mean and 'toxic' and you call people slurs when they don't get as many high little numbers next to your digital team's fake video game scoreboard as you want them to get, the only impression or memory they will ever have of you is that they don't like you and you made a lighthearted experience suck for 7 people. that is all you get to be to that person forever.

idk, maybe other people don't think that's sad and maybe it doesn't bother them, but if that was the most common impression i left on a bunch of different groups of strangers that i wont get to interact with again afterwards i would feel pretty sad and ashamed about it.

anyways. i need to partake in tasks that do not involve rambling on my phone now but if you read this that is cool thank you, if you didnt that is fine i understand this became a ridiculously long post out of nowhere i do not blame u, and. i hope you have a good day. ok goodbye

[echothelover]

In theory I love dogs but in practice I am terrified of every dog that exists around me

[tsunderedoctor]

Hi Purple 💖 I would like to request Headcanons...or mini scenarios? Whatever you want and are motivated to write! I think it's kinda an alternative universe idea?

The idea is: character and female reader had an argument/fight (you can decide why or just not mention the reason). Then character leaves for work and when he comes back he finds his s/o (sleeping and) cuddling with a pillow that wears his shirt.

How do they react? Characters are: Marco, Kidd, Shanks and if you want you can add Law?

Thanks a lot, have a great day and stay safe! ✨

Oh interesting idea! Sorry for the delay on answering this btw!! Also I changed a few of the cuddling portions so they were holding other items in their sleep, hope that’s okay! I also kept these in their world by accident- like I reread your ask and just realized now you wanted an AU- I’m so dumb- 

I can totally rewrite a new prompt if you don’t like these ones! I’m so sorry my brain is fried 😭😭

Warning: swearing; mostly on Kid’s part, mentions of self-hatred on Shanks

Babes down below!!

Marco

You two rarely argue; usually Marco’s chill demeanor makes it easy to find a middle ground. However, after Whitebeard’s death, Marco has been picking up more responsibilities to keep the Whitebeard pirates in check. Which means he was working over his usual hours. You only brought it up out of worry for his wellbeing, but Marco took it in a more personal matter that you felt the crew wasn’t important.

In the end, you found yourself both upset and confused on how you feel. In both your minds you were right and you two were too stubborn to apologize. Marco went ahead and headed out first to check on the crew leaving you alone in your shared room.

You knew he wouldn’t come back till late tonight, meaning you had time to go through your emotions and thoughts alone. After a few hours you were finally able to see where he came from and how your words might have hurt him. A feeling of sadness washed over knowing he was probably still in some way hurt. Feeling tears prick your eyes, you quickly stand up and grab the first thing of his you can find. Curling up in bed you held his night shirt tightly to your chest, eventually you felt unsatisfied with just hugging his shirt and found yourself placing it around his pillow. Feeling his scent and some cushion you eventually drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

Marco returned a few hours later, still feeling the ping of hurt himself at your words earlier. Knowing you were probably asleep he didn’t announce himself and got undressed to throw on his night clothes. Noticing his night shirt wasn’t where it was from that morning he turned to see if he left it on the bed. Seeing your sleeping figure holding his pillow with his shirt made his heart throb. 

Finding himself crawling into bed next to you, he gently moved the pillow out of your arms and replaced them with his own body. Kissing your forehead as a silent apology the blond found himself overcome with a much needed rest. 

Eustass “Captain” Kid

This man can’t help but argue! He loves to see the fire in your eyes and doesn’t mind if you swat at him a few times. However, everyone has their breaking points and he found yours. He likes to get under people’s skin, it’s what he’s good at, but seeing those idiots; Strawhat and the Surgeon of Death; not giving a shit about him put the red head in a foul mood.

Coming to check on his bandaged limb you didn’t expect to be greeted with a scowl. Figuring it wasn’t your problem and that he would get over it eventually you made your way over to rebandage him. 

“Fuck off, I ain’t got time to deal with you shit.”

Feeling your smile twitch at his cold words you quickly sat the medical kit down and went to work. Grabbing his arm, you went to undo the bandage before he shoved you hands away.

“Are you deaf now too? Get lost, go find someone else to nag bitch.” 

“You need to change your bandage, or do you want to get an infection smart ass?” You can feel your own anger rising from the surface, but tried to keep your cool knowing it wouldn’t work out for either of you.

“Like I give a shit, besides my devil fruit won’t let me get hurt too much, I ain’t weak like the likes of you.” 

Clenching your hands, you tried once more to grab at the bandage. 

“For fuck’s sake, when will you learn? I don’t need you!”

That was it, those words alone drove into your heart and down to your feet. You stood up and walked out leaving the man to bandage himself if he wanted to. He didn’t need you? Fine, let him rot away then.

You didn’t stop walking until you found yourself face first in your bed. Your body shaking on adrenaline alone as a broken sob exits your sore throat. Why did you even try with him? Sometimes you wondered if you were the crazy one between you two for even trying. Turning to face the window you were entangled with his fur coat. As another sob escaped your lips you clenched the coat for dear life. 

After he had his time to cool down and ask someone else to rewrap his bandage, Kid came to grab his coat for another cold night of drinking. He figured you went out as well, but seeing you curled up fast asleep and using his coat as some blanket made the man want to stay indoors instead. He would never openly admit his apologies to you, but the least he could do would not wake you up in the morning with a hungover mess. He owed you that much.

“Red Haired” Shanks

Another one where you just don’t see yourself arguing with. He’s generally level headed and serious when he needs to be and knows just the right words to cheer you up. However, there were things that seemed to gain you the opportunity to see the red headed devil. 

The man hates when you belittle yourself for whatever reason. In his eyes you are perfect, so why would you doubt his words. Are you subconsciously calling him a liar? It annoys the red head to no end seeing you struggle with your self-worth. Just when will you see how amazing you are?

However, seeing his fiery glare only backfired. Instead of understanding his side you quickly fell into a bigger form of self-hatred. You managed to make even him angry with you? Now you know for sure how pathetic you are. 

Quickly walking out of the room before he could lash out at you, you ventured to the bedroom. Trying to wipe away your tears you found yourself hiding in your makeshift comfort space. Shank’s closet wasn’t spacious, but it managed to fit you in at the tail end right corner. Giving you the space you needed to calm down when things got too rough. Taking a deep breath, you held on to a worn out shirt of his, feeling yourself slowly relax your overwhelming nerves. 

Shanks watched you leave and felt you needed time to digest his disappointment and irritation. He doesn’t mean to show his anger, but he also wants you to see how important you are to him. Deciding to give you the rest of the day to come to terms with that was the best he could do. Once the sun finally set and his crew was good for the night, he made his way to his room. Already forgetting his anger he happily entered and was greeted with a quiet emptiness. Looking around he couldn’t find you in the room nor the bathroom. Heading back to the room he almost left when he heard a quiet sound coming from his closet. 

Opening it to see what it was, his worry quickly turned into relief and sadness. Your tear stained face was fast asleep while you were drooling cutely on a worn shirt of his. Sighing to himself at his stupidity for leaving you alone, he picked you up and placed you in bed. Perhaps he should find a better way to express how much you mean to him.

Trafalgar D. Water Law

Law has always been a stubborn man. Ever since birth the world had to work his way or he refused to accept it. You supposed that made sense how he managed to live so long with what he had faced. Still, it didn’t mean he was always right. 

Law had decided to leave on his own for Punk Hazard, without the support of his crew. He felt that this was a battle he had to face alone. Part of you knew what he meant, but another part wish he understood the crew saw him as family too. 

Voicing your concerns and feelings fell on deaf ears as the man continued to pack his things. Biting your lip you tried to make one last feeble attempt to get him to let the crew come. 

“What if you don’t come back?” Your voice was barely a whisper as you felt the pain of bringing those thoughts to the air; but it was too late as he faced you. 

“Then that means I failed and you picked a shitty captain to follow.” Whether he was joking or not you couldn’t tell, but his answer made your heart hurt even more. Shitty? Please he was the best, whether he wanted to admit it or not. No one could come close to accomplish the things he had in such time.

Stating he had to grab more things from the operation room before leaving for the night, he left you alone and empty inside your once sacred place. The rest of the day left you with no chance to talk with him as he seemed to avoid you like the plague. By the time the sun set you found yourself curled up against Bepo. He was another one who seemed to worry about his beloved captain. You had eventually drifted into a fitful sleep while the unsteadiness of the situation tried to settle in your stomach. Bepo was about to cover you up when Law entered the shared space among the crew.

“Captain! Are you leaving now?”

Law turned to face Bepo, seeing your worried expression even in your sleep. He nodded a silent reply before walking over to you two. “Once you reach Zou remember to stay hidden; if I don’t come, make sure no one finds out who you guys are. Trafalgar Law dies with your names as well, understand?” 

Bepo could only nod and accept his captain's words as his grey eyes turned to face your sleeping figure. Taking off his old hat and replacing it with his new one, he placed the withered one on your head. It’s time to start anew for everyone, and that means you too.

[the-insomniac-emporium]

Wounded Love (Lady Dimitrescu/F!Reader)

Fandom: Resident Evil: Village Rating: M for mature. Blood, more blood, heavy language, seriously lots of blood. Literally the bloodiest/most detailed thing I've written. Genre: Super angst with some fluff to ease the pain. We're talking putting honey in your cup of poison to make it taste better. The ending is split, with both a happy and a sad ending. Warnings: Minor surgery (technically?) while the patient is fully awake (that's the reader, btws), blood loss, graphic depiction of a wound and how said wound is taken care of. Possible trigger for self-harm, as the reader is performing part of the surgery themselves. Also brief mention of cannibalism in the bad ending. This may very well be a Dead Dove: Do Not Eat sort of thing. Notes: While I have more medical knowledge than the average person, due to my Girl Scouts training + having a mother as a nurse, I am in no way shape or form a medical professional, and do not suggest that the methods of treatment used in this fic be taken seriously. If you find yourself seriously injured, do not attempt to replicate anything you read here. Only a portion of this is based on a real-ass incident I went through, the rest is based on a dream, and what I experienced was not what you want to do in an emergency.

{Wounded Love}

This was a mistake. Blood stains your leg, your fingers, and bruises start to form all over your exhausted body. And for what? Why had you, a tiny, fragile human, dared to pass through this damned, lycan-infested forest? Because a woman who didn’t even love you asked you to. Now you were going to die, body certain to get left out in the cold or reduced to a pile of gnawed bones. If you had more strength remaining, you might have slammed your hand into the ground in frustration, or screamed until your lungs burned from something other than frost.

But that wouldn’t get you anywhere. Wouldn’t help you get back to the castle, wouldn’t ease the racing of your heart. So you settle for the only thing that might do any good: One quick motion pulls the scarf from your neck, sending a chill down your spine that you promptly ignore. Even with shaky hands and numb fingers, your experience is enough to let you wrap the cloth around your leg, tying the ends in a knot to secure it. The pressure hurts, just not enough for you to prefer bleeding out. A test step reveals that walking is mildly more difficult now.

“I’m going to haunt her,” you muse, under your breath, tears starting to freeze at the corner of your eyes. Still, you are as quietly determined as ever, and so once more you limp down the path. Every time you put weight on your injured leg it protests harder. If not for the snow and ice covering the ground, you might have quickly searched for a walking stick. “What could be so important about this damn package? Couldn’t Doug or whatever-his-fucking-name-is deliver it? Man can practically teleport, and here I am, watching as blood loss and hypothermia race to see who can kill me first.”

Gods were you angry. Why had this happened so soon after you had settled in? Finally you had been comfortable in Castle Dimitrescu, no longer as frightened of the residents, even finding them… charming, in a way. Then the Lady of house called to you for what she claimed to be a simple errand. You had believed her, even when she explained that you would have to leave the relative safety of her home. What a fool you had been.

“What a fool she must be,” you murmur, “to think me safe here. To think I could outlast wolfmen prowling the village outskirts.” Would she even care if she saw you now? Would she be surprised, disappointed? Would she do something to change your fate? There was no reason for her to do so. It didn’t matter how much you had helped her, how much she claimed to appreciate what you did (heavy lifting, repair of clothing, massages). You were as replaceable as any other Maiden there was. And that, that was what made you have a double-take. It came to you in that moment, a thought so painful that you could not deny it was the truth. “She never thought I would survive.”

Bitterness coats your tongue, like blood in your throat, and your brain demands that you destroy your cargo, the very thing that got you sent here in the first place. You almost do it. Feet stopping, arms shrugging the carrying straps off, bloody hands taking hold of it. Tears fall, just two, and hit the package. At that moment your plan changed. This new idea would be far, far more satisfying… as long as you succeeded.

------------------------

Spite was one hell of a drug. Enough of it and you could march your warm corpse right back to the castle, fist banging on the front door with everything you had. The path had been shorter than you thought, thankfully, but it had still taken so much out of you. Now you were leaning against the door, sliding down it, unable to support your own weight. Nothing inside the castle stirred. Were they ignoring you? Was Alcina really going to let you die inches from your “home”? Fuck that, you thought.

“Alcina!” You scream, loud as you can, startling the birds in the distant trees. The word echoes around you and rattles inside your ribs. It’s not enough. “Damn it, I am seconds away from dying, get out here now so I can look you in your fucking eyes!” Something tears a little in your throat, turning the last of your words into a hellish screech, leaving you to gasp and croak in the snow. You go to wipe your tear-filled eyes with your hands, only to remember just how much blood they’re covered in.

Sobs overtake you in just a few moments. You’re blinded by tears, deafened by sorrows, and numb from all the cold. In the aching seconds before you black out, you can only barely make out the silhouette of someone rushing to your side…

------------------------

The first thing you feel when you wake up is mind searing pain. You try to jolt upwards, only to find a pair of strong, gloved hands holding you down. Someone shouts something, but you can’t make it out, and you feel another hand gently squeeze one of your own. Pained gasps escape your throat one after the other, but whatever is hurting you doesn’t stop. It takes a full minute for you to adjust enough to make sense of where you are. At last, you understand what’s being said.

“-it’s okay, shhh, please, we’re trying to help,” says none other than Lady Dimitrescu herself. She’s the one holding your hand, doing her best not to hurt you with her grip, trying desperately to calm you down. One the other side of you, Cassandra is positioned to hold you down. There’s a tight-lipped scowl on her face, and her brow is furrowed, but she’s not looking at your face, but rather eying somewhere in the opposite direction. Following her gaze, you find her older sister is sitting near your injured leg, and is undeniably the source of some of your pain. In one hand she holds a bottle of alcohol (notably not the wine her family produces), the other holding a wet cloth to your wound. No wonder it stings so much.

“Shit, shit, stop,” you growl, barely getting the words out. But all anyone does is look at you. Alcina’s mouth opens to speak, only for you to cut her off. “I’ve got medical training, for the love of Mother Miranda let me help! How long have I been unconscious?” This time Bela stops, glancing at her mother for direction. The grip on your torso grows looser, with Cassandra evidently heeding your words, and you take the chance to sit up, careful not to move your leg. At this point you realize that there’s a needle of sorts in your arm, attached to a tube, which trails up into a blood bag. It’s clearly been improvised with equipment from the “wine-making” part of the castle.

“Fifteen minutes at most,” a new voice chimes, from somewhere behind you. “I got that cloth you wanted, mother, but something tells me I’m not done fetching things.” Ah, Daniela Dimitrescu. Was the whole family helping you?... Why? As much as you wanted answers, there wasn’t (currently) time for questions. Not when one glance at your leg tells you that some of your flesh is rapidly decomposing. The wound was made only an hour ago, and already it was getting deadlier than you could even process.

“I need a sharp, clean knife, a needle with thread, a glass of water, and someone needs to put a metal tool, sterilized, on the stove, right now,” you said, finding it easier to talk now that no one was cleansing your wound. Without hesitation Daniela dispersed into a cloud of insects, heading towards the kitchen, while Cassandra stood up and moved towards the stairs.

“Guess I’ll get the needle,” she said, sounding rather unenthusiastic.

“What are you planning?” Alcina asks, more concerned than you had ever heard her before. Attempting to reassure her, you manage a small smile before explaining.

“Got scratched and slobbered on by a lycan. Whatever they have, it’s infectious. If I want to save my leg, or at least have a chance at surviving, I have to take measures to reduce the likelihood of an infection,” you say. Now Alcina is slowly stroking her thumb across your hand, eyes narrowed with concern. There’s a look on her face that you can’t quite parse, something she’s not saying. For now you ignore it and continue going over your plan. “The best thing would be to amputate. The tourniquet might have helped prevent the saliva from getting further into my body- and I do mean might- but I can’t keep it on forever. Problem is… I don’t want to lose it. God, I’m terrified of that, and with what we have in the castle I… I’d be more likely to die of shock than not. So, well, forget that idea.

“I’m just going to remove the wound. By making a bigger wound. It’s crazy, I know, but this will kill me if we do nothing. It will probably kill me if we do. The technical term is some shit like ‘de-bride-ing’?... No, debridement, I think. Except normally the poor fucker getting cut open is asleep for the procedure.” By the time you’re done, Lady Dimitrescu is looking at you with horror. Yeah, you had a feeling she wouldn’t appreciate the idea. “Look, if this is too much… if it’s not worth saving me, if you’d rather give me a quick death, I understand. If I were-”

“Don’t be foolish, dear. You will not die, not as long as something can be done about it,” Alcina replies, quickly, eager to stop hearing you talk about dying. It’s… strange to hear her sound so confident about saving you, even stranger to realize what she called you. As if reading your thoughts, she shifts in her seat, avoiding your gaze for a moment. Shyness didn’t suit her, and you imagined it was more about her finding the right words. When she speaks, she’s looking right at you again. “I have hesitated to tell you the truth, and now I find the world playing a cruel trick on me, trying to take that which I adore. But I don’t want to aggravate your stress right now. Please, think nothing of what I have said.”

Before you could reply, footsteps reached your ears, and soon enough Daniela returns. In one hand she holds a large pitcher of water. In the other? Several knives, of various sizes, one of which you’re pretty sure you’ve seen Cassandra playing with before. As soon as you see her your face lights up, glad to be able to start the procedure.

“Oh thank fuck- or, I mean, thank you, Lady Daniela,” you stutter, reaching out as she offers you the items. Thankfully Bela had already made room on the table at your side, where she had set the bottle of alcohol down. For a moment you had forgotten that she was there. Had she already known about her mother’s feelings? Based on her lack of reaction, you could only assume that she was well aware. “I’m gonna scream, B-T-dubs. Just, uh, cover your ears?” You offer, already holding your chosen knife (big enough to be effective, small enough to offer precision).

“So… you’re going to do this yourself? Didn’t think you had it in you, red. Try not to cut anything important. Wouldn’t want to have to clean that mess up,” Daniela teases. As soon as she’s finished she has to shift into a swarm, as Bela flat out throws a knife at her. For a moment you freeze, watching as Alcina rises to her full height, staring her eldest daughter down. Behind her, Daniela reforms, clearly using her mother as a shield. “I was just trying to relieve the tension, jeez. It’s like you think she’s already dead.”

“Don’t speak another word!” Alcina snaps, sending a frightening stare towards Daniela. You cough, awkwardly, not knowing what to do. Meanwhile Bela is pinching the bridge of her nose between two fingers, clearly tired of dealing with her sister’s sense of humor. “No one will speak a word until this is finished, unless my dear needs something, understood?” Both the girls nod at that, neither feeling a need to risk any further ire.

“I’m just going to start working now,” you awkwardly chime, taking a deep breath before leaning in towards your injured leg. On closer inspection you can see a strange, dark residue in the wound. They’re specks, scattered along the length of it, and they seem more common the closer you look to the gash’s center. Gross, you think. Half curious, half checking for legitimate reasons, you bring your other hand to the cut and gently spread both sides apart. It hurts like hell, and you have to bite down on your lip to stop yourself from screaming. But sure enough, the residue is practically solid at the deepest point of the wound. “Those lycans really should be on leashes.”

Out of the corner of your eye you can see Daniela exchange looks with Bela, but neither of them disobey their mother (yet). Shaking the thought away, you finally get to the brunt of the task at hand. Your hand moves slowly, reluctant to inflict such damage against its own body. As soon as the tip of the knife touches your skin, you start to doubt your ability to do this. It takes looking at Alcina, seeing the way she watches you with equal parts concern and tenderness, to remind you why you’re doing this. Death just wasn’t something you could accept right now; not after what she had said, what she had implied.

The knife is fantastically sharp. Hardly any pressure is needed before your flesh gives away, cells letting go of their neighbors like it was a casual affair. You start at the left side of your injury, digging down a little, trying to only go as deep as you needed to. Tears formed in your eyes but you quickly blinked them away. As the first of many screams leaves your mouth, you turn and twist the knife, cutting to the right, then up. Like scooping the seeds out of a pumpkin. Fresh blood springs from the wound, starting to fill up the crevice. Quickly you discard the skin you removed by tossing it into the same bowl that Bela had put a bloody towel in earlier.

“Yes,” you shudder through gritted teeth, “this hurts so fucking bad. No, I don’t need someone to take over yet.” At this point neither of the present sisters are looking at you, seeming oddly uncomfortable at the sight of you cut up like this. Hadn’t they done worse to your fellow Maidens?... Whatever, the thought couldn’t last long when you still had work to do.

Next you take a fresh, damp cloth and dab at your injury, ignoring how it throbbed beneath your touch. Then you resumed cutting, forced to press the knife deeper in order to remove the spreading residue. If you had been a scientist, this would have been utterly fascinating to observe. Whatever had been in the lycan’s saliva was slowly eating at your flesh, but not outright dissolving it. No, it simply left the skin where it was, but killed and rapidly broke it down. Yes, it would have been fascinating, if not for the fact that there was a chance you wouldn’t be able to outpace the bacteria.

With this in mind you force yourself to hold in your next scream, hoping to make it easier for you to focus. The knife continued to cut, going lower, setting nerves alight as it did. Your vision starts to blur, and for a few seconds you think you’re going to black out. Someone says something you don’t hear, and then suddenly there’s a hand on top of your own. When your vision clears you see Bela is responsible, her grip keeping you from dropping the knife. She doesn’t let go until you give her a clear nod. Even then, she seems reluctant to let you continue.

Around this time is when Cassandra returns. Her footsteps catch your attention (it’s your understanding that carrying objects is much harder in swarm mode), and you spare her a quick glance before getting back to work. A few moments later she’s placing a set of needles and a long spool of thread next to you. Ironically, they’re the same tools that you’ve used to repair and adjust Alcina’s dresses over the past year. Hopefully they work just as well on flesh, you think. Your next thoughts are canceled out by unbelievable pain. More cries leave your lips, and your hand starts shaking. Panic is settling in fast, your movements getting sharper, leading you to make a brash decision: Time to care less about precision and more about speed.

“Distract me, please,” you gasp between grunts. No one responds at first, and you know they need clarification. Speaking is getting harder by the second, but you do your best. “Brain can’t process many stimulants, same time. Just- fuck- trace skin around wound, touch hair, anything.” Somewhere between your semi-broken sentences and screams, Alcina gets the message. She’s moving closer, now, behind you, one arm wrapping around your waist, the other rubbing gentle circles on your undamaged leg. Across from you Daniela is too busy pacing to help, though you can hardly blame her.

“Should I get the metal thing from the stove?” Cassandra asks, silently hoping that Dani hadn’t assumed someone else was going to handle that part. You’re still in too much pain to talk, so you half nod half grunt in response. Not bothering to say anything, the middle child takes off, swarm moving at what might be a new speed record.

As much as your hands are shaking, you still manage to cut away another strip of flesh, tossing it aside with even less care than before. This time Bela wipes the wound for you, practically reading your mind. The moment her hands are completely out of the way you start cutting again, crying out, throat shredded to pieces from all your screaming. Alcina sounds like she might be close to sobbing, but she doesn’t stop her movements, doing her best to distract you just like you had asked. Even Bela helps, now, tracing spots around your injury whenever she knows she won’t be in your way. The effect is minor, in the end, hardly making a dent in how much pain you’re processing.

If you survive this, though, you’re hugging every daughter as tight as you can and showering them with affection… but only after you finish doing the same for their mother.

“You are so brave,” Alcina murmurs next to your ear. It’s even clearer now how close she is to crying, her voice seconds away from cracking. Hearing her like this almost hurts as bad as the initial lycan attack did. “You are so strong. No other mortal could ever be your match. Do you understand, my dear? You are blessed, divine, and I love you so much.”

In any other setting, her words would leave you melting in her arms, radiating affection so strongly that you might as well have been radioactive. Instead, you are unable to respond, or even look her way. All you can do is press the knife to your skin again, showing your own feelings by destroying yourself for her.

The blade is starting to find more resistance, and you’re having to pause more often, spots appearing in your vision. Going faster only makes things worse, your hand threatening to slip. You’re determined to finish this, no matter what, but your need to control the situation is gradually making things worse. Alcina notices this before you do, and acts before you have a chance to protest.

“Bela, the knife,” she says, then tightens her grip on your waist. Your confusion shifts to panic as your arm is carefully, but forcefully, pulled away from your wound. “Can you finish the job?” It takes you a few moments to realize that Alcina isn’t talking to you. No, she’s speaking to her eldest daughter, who doesn’t hesitate to take the knife away from you. It’s so easy for her, between her strength and your weakness. “Don’t struggle. Let us finish this.”

Protests rise from your throat and die in your mouth. Pain flares harder now that Bela isn’t distracting you. Once more your vision goes dark, but this time there’s no pause, no hesitation. You are suffering, horribly, and the Dimitrescu family refuses to make you hurt longer than necessary. It’ll be over soon, you think, not knowing whether you refer to your pain or your life itself.

Something wet drops onto the back of your neck, then darkness overtakes you…

------------------------

“Damn those lycans, I should string Heisenberg up myself! They’re his responsibility, after all,” Lady Dimitrescu snarls, trying to ignore the tears in her eyes. Now that you’re unconscious, unable to hear what ails her, she feels free to voice her thoughts. “The damn things should never have come close to the path to the village.”

“What if she strayed from the path? Wouldn’t that explain it?” Bela suggests, even as her hands work to remove what seems to be the last piece of dead/infected flesh from your leg. She hates how the words feel in her mouth, hates suggesting that you of all people might have betrayed her mother’s trust. But it makes sense. After all, this whole mess, with you leaving the castle to retrieve a mysterious package, was all a test to see if you would try to run. It hadn’t been her idea, and Bela admitted to herself that she thought it was unnecessary.

“On the way back? Why would she bother getting the package if she intended to run?” Lady Dimitrescu asks, right as Cassandra returns. The middle child is practically juggling the metal spatula she’s carrying, irritated (not harmed) by the heat it produced. One of her brows perks up when she hears the conversation, but she keeps any thoughts she has to herself.

“Just a thought, mother, I didn’t quite believe it myself,” Bela chimes, after a pause. With that said she holds up her hand with pride, clutching between her fingers the last of the decaying flesh. The way the others react, one might have thought that a miracle had been performed. Daniela clapped her hands together, giggling a little, and finally stopped her pacing. “Don’t celebrate too much, now,” Bela reminded her, taking the spatula from Cassandra as she did. “There’s still plenty to do. It’s a good thing she’s not awake for this part.”

A good thing, indeed. She uses her fingers to spread the remaining skin a little, giving a quick examination, then deciding that she had successfully removed all remaining residue. Keeping her fingers where they were, she pressed the side of the spatula to your skin, putting the most pressure at the center of the wound. Three seconds passed, then she lifted her hand. A pause. She pressed it back into place, keeping a close eye on the affected area. This repeated several times, the gaps being necessary to prevent unintentional damage. Once the wound seemed properly closed she set the spatula aside.

“Is that it?... Did we save her?” Daniela asks, opting to finally sit down in a nearby chair. Something about her word choice makes both of her sisters scoff.

“I could sew it closed, as a precaution, but there’s no way I’d do it the way she had intended. It might be best to just give her time to rest, and see what she thinks when she gets back up,” Bela answers. For a moment her words hang in the air, but eventually Alcina gives a little nod and a hum.

“Very well. I shall carry her to my quarters, where she won’t be disturbed. Please, let one of the Maidens know to bring some food up this evening,” Alcina says, gently taking you into her arms as she does…

------------------------

BAD ENDING: It’s been six hours, with no sign of you waking up. Your other wounds had been examined, cleaned, and bandaged. Food had been carefully prepared and brought up to you, though it now remained on the bedside table, untouched. Alcina has gone to call Mother Miranda, intending to speak to her about the growing unrest of the lycans, as Heisenberg hadn’t answered his phone. For the first time since you returned you are alone. It is now, of all times, that you awaken. A gasp sends you into a coughing spree, forcing you into a sitting position. The space around you feels like it's moving, and your vision blurs. Blood spills from your mouth as you finally regain the ability to breathe.

Seconds later your vision clears, but what you see is enough to make you wish you couldn’t. The blood that spilled onto the sheets is a dark red… with even darker spots scattered throughout it. All at once you know what happened: Residue had hidden from you, or gone deeper than your wound, infecting you before you ever stood a chance. Tears threaten to spill from your eyes, but something deeper starts calling to you. Something older. Darker. It drags you to your feet, ignores the pain of your wounds, and sends you out the bedroom door.

Your mind is racing, thoughts never quite clear enough for you to understand. It doesn’t feel like you’re in control of your own movements. Was something else in charge, or were you operating on an infection powered autopilot? Answers weren’t coming, just bloodshed.

“You’re not supposed to be out of bed yet!” A voice calls out to you, making you turn to investigate. On the other end of the hallway is a maiden, one you instantly recognize. You’ve worked with her before, plenty of times, tag-teaming more tasks than you could count. She was like a sister to you. When she sees the blood staining your clothes, she gasps, then moves to support you. “Please, Lady Dimitrescu will be so upset if you-” her words melt into a blood curdling scream. For a moment you don’t understand.

And then you swallow, a chunk of hot meat slipping down your throat, and the scream dies down.

“What?...” You whisper, finally tasting the blood in your mouth, watching as your friend’s body falls to the floor. There’s a chunk of flesh missing from her neck, and the dots connect themselves in your head. You did that. Every part of you wants to scream, wants to cry out and beg someone to come kill you. Instead you fall to your knees, hard, uncaring. Your hands move themselves, grasping at the still warm corpse. Something has made you stronger, or at the very least removed the mental limits that kept you from destroying yourself. Flesh gives under your touch, tearing like paper, and you start crying as it reaches your mouth.

Footsteps approach, thundering fast, and you want to warn whoever it is. When you turn to look, you feel your hands let go of your meal. Your gaze meets that of a stunned Cassandra Dimitrescu, then drifts to the sickle in her hand.

“Kill me,” you growl, voice distorted, practically echoing. “Kill me now!” Not needing to be told a third time, Cassandra moves lightning quick, swarm-jumping forward before manifesting behind you, sickle dragging across your throat in one smooth motion. But it’s not enough. She realizes this, though, and slams her foot into your back, sending you tumbling forward. It’s enough to prevent you from countering, which gives her time to advance again, this time pulling a knife from her boot and driving it into the center of your back. When you scream, it’s not with your own voice, but that of a monster.

“Fucking fuck, what the fuck, red?” Daniella asks as she rounds the corner, eyes immediately landing on your bloodsoaked mouth. She’s quick to take in the scene, drawing a conclusion easily, even if it breaks her heart a little. Your vision fades as she approaches, and you know that it’s finally over. If only you had expired a few seconds earlier… because the last thing you hear is the startled cry of your would-be lover.

“No! No, darling, what happened-” Alcina finishes her sentence, but you do not hear it. You do not hear anything, anymore. You do not know it… but there will be hell to pay for your death.

------------------------

GOOD ENDING: When you awake, you find yourself in the softest sheets you’ve ever touched, a warm and familiar presence next to you. The first thing you see is Alcina’s sleeping face next to your own. She’s on her side, one arm around your waist, the covers pulled up to her hip. Warmth fills your chest as you take in the sight. For a few moments you just… appreciate this. Never before had you imagined that you would get to wake up next to the woman you loved so much. A sigh, one of bliss, leaves your lips. Slowly you move forward, gently placing a kiss to Alcina’s cheek. Seconds later her eyelids flutter open, and she tiredly takes you in.

“You’re… awake,” she murmurs, hardly awake herself. But her fatigue doesn’t last long. As soon as she’s fully processed the situation her eyes go wide. Then she’s pulling you closer, careful not to hurt you, and peppering little kisses over your face. “I’ve been so worried, dear. You scared us so much.” The hurt in her voice leaves you restless, making you curl up against her, desperate to soothe her worries. Moving hurts a little, but not enough to dissuade you from your goal.

“I’m sorry, love,” you say, tears pricking your eyes. “I’m okay, I’m alive, the plan worked out. You don’t have to fret for me anymore. I won’t leave you, I promise.” Slowly but surely, Alcina calms, exchanging kisses for softly running her fingers through your hair. There’s such love in her eyes that you can hardly believe you aren’t dreaming. “You’re amazing, Alcina. I could stay like this all day.”

“Maybe we should,” she offers, chuckling a little. Once again you give her a quick kiss, unable to resist the urge. “I should have never asked you to leave. I should have just trusted you.” The words give you pause, and you tilt your head in confusion. Realizing that you still didn’t know the full story, Alcina frowns. “The package is worthless, just a bundle of straw and a few rocks for weight. It was never what I cared about.”

Tension builds in your chest, and for a few seconds you have no idea how to react. It takes a minute for you to think, to connect the dots, but once you do it’s a tad bit easier to breathe. A scowl twists your lips as you think of what to say.

“If I had known that Heisenberg was forgoing his duties, I never would have sent you outside,” Alcina adds, the silence taking its toll on her.

“You shouldn’t have sent me either way,” you respond, bitterly, thinking of all that you had seen and heard on your journey. “I would have done anything to prove to you how I feel. There are other ways to show devotion- far less dangerous ways, at that.”

“I know, dear. You have every right to be angry… and watching you suffer has taught me all that I need to know,” Alcina says, still playing with your hair, trying to ease the tension. As upset as you about this recent revelation… it’s not enough to change how you feel about her, and you want her to understand that, fully and completely.

So you lean into her touch, let your eyes drift close for a moment, then softly place one of your arms around her as best as you can.

“We’ll need to talk about this more… just not right now. Right now, I need you, Alcina. I need to hold you, and be held by you, and just know that you’re here. That I’m here. That neither of us are going anywhere,” you say, resting your forehead against hers. “I need to feel safe, and your arms are the safest place I can imagine. Stay here with me?”

“It will be the easiest thing I have ever done.”

[grokebaby]

PLEASE I've gotta know more about Jetter she is so PRETTY !! Does the species of fungus that infected her have any lore ? Is she he like ok with just living with it now ? Is there anywhere I can read more about him ? ?? AUGH sorry if this is overwhelming I love your chars <3

HEEM no need to apologise!!! This is definitely the most soul touching ask I've gotten in millions of years!!!

As a note: there's still posts on my blog where Jetter is referred with he/him and that is bc she's a very old character and I've certainly had a bit of a journey with her. In the recent years I transed her gender (MtF) and tho in universe she's yet to crack the egg, this character goes by she/her. I wanted to clarify that, bc I was gonna answer that you can see more of her by going through her tag (#Jetter) but some posts are old and from the time before I started revamping her! So like at least that part is outdated. Most stuff relating to her interesting floral mutations has stayed the same tho :]

About the infection: It's a species of parasitic plant and yes it does have lore! It's a very adaptable and "intelligent"/advanced species that can inhabit several kinds of hosts. Most typically it's life cycle goes one of two ways

1. Ground originated: A seed sprouts from the ground. It tends to grow best several feet Below surface, as it takes up lots of space. It can lay dormant underground for a while, many years even, until sprouting to detectable, active levels. The type of seed that takes root in the ground is usually an american football sized bud, surrounded by thick shell. The plant's goal here is to spread and grow, so it starts leeching off of any and every other plant or floral lifeform it can to do so. It can hijack trees, plants and some fungus species, which grants it longevity, since if it just sucked them dry immediately, the plants would die quickly and thus it'd be robbed of further sustinence. You'll find this a theme with the plant. Once it's big enough to detect above ground, it's usually too late/extremely difficult to eradicate. Once reaching a certain level of physical maturity, it goes in with the chemical attack. It's flowers produce an overpowering scent that has strong hormonal effects, acting sort of like a sedative, while also making the lifeform affected more fond of the plant. Just like, making you feel all nice and great so you just wanna stay with the plant. It's one of the lures. Another lure is fruit. To begin the second stage of spread, the plant must get a lifeform to ingest parts of it. Pollen, fruits or flowers typically work best. Once ingested, it begins adapting to it's new environment aka the living host. It hijacks parts of the brain and goes from parasitic to symbiotic, to sustain the host obviously. From then on it's goal is less to spread and more just flourish and survive, but the host can still infect other people in certain ways, but only if the plant has properly taken growth into the body (at which point it can't be removed safely anymore).

2. That ofc brings us the second life cycle which is attained from an infected host. Typically, if the host dies, it's body acts as a growing ground for the flower's seeds and the cycle restarts. But while alive, some ways of spreading it to others usually includes another person ingesting or being struck with parts of the plant. For an example of the latter, like. If the infected person sneezes and pollen or stuff gets into someone's eyes or mouth. If the infected person starts growing fruit or berries though, those are no longer infectious to other people, though they can be used as lure nonetheless (*flirtatious wink*). Oh also if the infected person bites or otherwise breaks skin on someone and gets pollen there and the wound is left to fester..

About the symbiosis: As I mentioned the plant has some heavy chemicals at it's disposal so in order to cooperate with the host it'll use those chemicals to communicate with the brain. At it's early spread stages it's mostly just taking it's time to take root and see what the new crib is like. The adaptation period can be really clumsy. Once reaching the stage where it can properly communicate with the brain, things tend to go smoother. It familiarizes itself with the host's brain slowly, to work with it best, and though this stage can take a while to perfect completely, the plant is able to make basic requests and stimulate simple activities. Like making the host drink lots of water or bathe so the plant gets water, making the host hungrier so it eats for two, calming them down via happy chemicals if it detects the host overly alarmed ect. It's like Brain 2: Electric Boogaloo except it's a plant brain. At the later stages (after 2-4yrs of being infected, depending on complexity or size of host), the plant is able to adapt better to work with the host in more complex ways. It'll gain access to senses, both the host's and it's own (points at those massive flowers growing on Jetter), so it won't just be flailing around. It'll also start "understanding" things the host already knows, like social contexts and what's considered appropriate, who's your mate or family, allies, enemies ect. Note: the plant isn't conscious, it's doing all this with chemical signals and using the brain as it's central processor. There's not another "person" inside the host - and tho they can have conflicts with what the plant would see as best vs the host knowing I can't Just Do That, it's not comparable to being possessed or anything. No split personality situations here, just a plant moving into your body.

Jetter and the plant: Okay so she got it while patrolling her home kingdom's lands (she was a commander), and got immediately infected bc nobody knows wtf that is yet. It takes a bit for any symptoms to show so she directs a few more investigations about the plant until people start acting all funny and odd and so her troops retreat until further notice. Few days later she's bedridden and talks funny and moves funny. Seems all drunkenly and disoriented. Has really vivid weird dreams. Not necessarily related to the plant but Jetter herself: She confessed to her crush (coworker, male) sometime earlier and got rejected but nobody knew of it, until now, when said crush tells about it to their authorities. It quickly becomes a scandal Because (Homophobia and/or said crush showing his true colors: aka asshole). So Jetter is suspended until further notice, esp bc of her infected state and she's hospitalized/put under surveillance. Fast forward through some really awful times and she fucks off of her kingdom entirely, taking on to a wanderer lifestyle. For a while she mostly has just some odd motor dysfunctions and occasionally just blacking out or going into a zombie like state (she's barely here but awake and the plant is practicing trying to function with her). She's definitely not feeling very comfortable with all this body invasion stuff esp with how her life is turned upside down so there's alot of personal conflict with the plant settling in but it eventually smooths out as she recovers from the awful events she went through, and starts to work just fine with the plant. At least since she's a loner and nobody has to see her rolling around in the dirt and standing face up in the pouring rain. Or attacking other plants that her little symbiotic pal sees as threats.

At her current story stage, the plant has grown it's own sensory organs (again points at those two massive flowers), and is starting to get comfortable in this host, being mostly helpful or harmless by now. Still, bc she's been a loner for so long, the plant hasn't needed to get accustomed to functioning appropriately around other people, so, she'll definitely have the plant put her in embarrassing situations in the future when she returns to civilization again more full time. Unintentionally mind you. The plant doesn't realize it'd be inappropriate for some strange lady to start wrecking up a florist shop without context. So, to sum up, she's in the mid to latter stages but not fully integrated yet. Needs more fine tuning, but she's at the better, easier part of her journey with this plant. Just one more hurdle to get through once she like. Gets friends. And is around people consistently. Oh and the uh, internalized transphobia and homophobia. That too.. She had some struggles and Idk I guess she's "Okay" w the plant now but bc it still needs fine tuning it's more like this, kinda awkward but still helpful thing you have to apologise to other people about occasionally and stuff. Inconvenience. Like "No, I'm not drinking from that puddle. Let's drink from a spring. No, I'm not rolling in mud. When everyone's looking.. No, I'm not gonna tear up that flower. It's harmless." stuff like that

[emmy-dekarios-bg3]

Heart of the Weave - A Baldur’s Gate Fanfiction

Chapter 4

A faint yet loud voice outside the front door can be heard, and I begin to think: there’s no way they’re here already?! The sooner the better I suppose! Gale and I press our ears to the door, wondering if it’s who we think it is. The voice is rather familiar; too familiar, in fact.

“You mean to tell me there’s not a Whizbangs in Waterdeep? COME ON!!” Ah, yes. Karlach. Karlach is our funny, enthusiastic Tiefling friend who had an engine for a heart. She was also on the nautiloid and infected with one of those parasites within the ocular region. Her story is that she was basically sold to Avernus – or, Hell – by someone she once trusted. His name was Gortash and he was one of the bastards we had to kill in Baldur’s Gate. His evil political influence and desire to dominate the world was nauseating and unbearable, so we had to do what we had to do. Plus, Karlach got her revenge. He should not have sold her to Hell to serve for an archdevil. She went back to Avernus with Wyll, the Blade of Avernus, so they can fight together and keep her alive. Her engine would not allow her to live much outside of the Hells.

Gale opens the door and there stands three of our loyal, badass friends on the castle porch: Shadowheart, Karlach, and Wyll. It appears Lae’zel is still in the Astral Planes, and who knows what happened to Astarion, Halsin, and Jaheira? I start to wonder what happened to our other loving friends who started new lives elsewhere.

“Holy shit! It’s Gale! Wait, is that Emmy behind you?! How’d you know we were here?” Karlach says enthusiastically, looking as if she’s ready to punch an object out of pure excitement.

“Well, you do know we’re married, do you not?” Gale asks her with a smirk painted upon his face. I can’t help but laugh at his remark, because she was at our wedding. “Besides, we knew you were here because there’s only one person – er, tiefling – we know that gets this excited about Whizbangs.”

“Damn pal. You got me.”

“Karlach and I found a forge in Avernus to fix her heart. We’re so excited to adventure with you guys again, as long as no ‘Chosen Three’ or ‘elder brain’ gets involved again,” Wyll says, wrapping his arm around Karlach’s waist. I smile, wishing I could jump up and down in ecstasy from this news, though I’m dead set on the idea that I’ll vomit everywhere. I already feel a knot curl up within my stomach.

“Karlach! That���s…amazing news. Can I hug you?” I ask her, trying to maintain my excitement.

“Of course, soldier!” I hug Karlach, feeling her strong arms embrace me in return for over a minute. No flames are rising from her body anymore, nor does she even feel hot. She’s considered my best friend and I’m more than thrilled that she’s going to be okay outside of Avernus, but more relieved she no longer has to suffer. I am more than thankful we saved her life in time when she was about to explode from her old engine. I can’t imagine missing Karlach and begging for her to be alive.

“I have arrived! Oh, it’s so good to see everyone again. Well, most of you. I imagine we’ll bump into Astarion on the road, should he be able to find us in the darkness,” Shadowheart says. I hug her as well, and she immediately begins to feel the heat of my skin from the fever. “You really aren’t feeling great, are you? You are burning up. Let’s leave as quickly as possible.”

“I have dealt with being poisoned, burned, frozen… I really think I’ll be okay,” I say. Now that I think about it, it’s wild. Everyone is so concerned about me, considering I have dealt with much worse in the past, nearly meeting my death bed on multiple occasions. Then again, we just need confirmation this isn’t the tadpole again at least. Gale takes my hand, holding it gently and rubbing my knuckles with his thumb. Judging by the look on his face, it looks like he is praying to some Goddess or God silently.

“I’ve prayed to Sêlune. I bet it’s just a bug, but let’s go just in case,” Shadowheart responds, giving off a fake smile. “You never know what this could turn into.” Her and I grew very close on our adventures, to the point she’s gotten super protective over me. I was with her when her parents passed. She once told me I am the only person she has left, and ever since those words escaped her lips, I’ve considered her family to me. I can’t imagine how it’s been for her, traveling alone and discovering the world without a companion by her side. I’m sure it gets rather lonely.

“Well, we probably should leave now. The quicker we leave, the better,” I say. “Don’t worry, I set out enough food for Tara to indulge in while we’re gone.”

“Good news on that front, Tara knows how to pluck vegetables from the garden, so she’ll be okay regardless,” Gale says. “Off we go.”

I close the door behind us and we head on the road in Waterdeep that leads to Baldur’s Gate, though it will be awhile before we actually get there. The fresh air outside seems to make me feel more refreshed than before somehow. The beautiful petunias growing on the side of the road, the large yet beautiful pieces of architecture in the city, such as museums and the Academy, and of course the cute little markets where people are making a living… It’s all so pleasing to the eye.

“So, how have you guys been?” I ask Karlach. “I see you and Wyll are together at last! I knew it would happen someday.”

“You are correct! We’re engaged, actually. No set date for the wedding. Wyll proposed to me in Avernus right after slaying the head off of a giant. Nothing more romantic than that.”

“I was going to have it be a traditional engagement, but alas this was before we could fix her engine, so I had to do it in Avernus. I didn’t want to wait,” Wyll says with animation in his voice, almost like how Karlach sounds every time she talks. It actually makes me so happy they ended up together. It’s funny how they were once enemies, threatening to murder one another, and now they’re engaged to be married. They grow up so fast.

“Well, congrats you two!”

“Don’t worry, Emmy. You’re definitely invited to the wedding. You too, Gale and Shadowheart.”

“Thank you, Wyll. That’s appreciated,” Shadowheart says. “Ah, I love weddings. I’m so glad I was able to be the maid of honor at Emmy and Gale’s wedding, it was absolutely stunning. I’d relive that day if I could.”

“Oh trust me, so could I,” Gale says, holding my hand within his as we walk the quiet roads of Waterdeep. It feels nice to catch up with my friends that I haven’t seen since the reunion party five – or maybe six – months ago. It feels much longer than that.

Another sudden wave of severe nausea hits me like a freight train, causing me to stop walking for a moment. This time, it’s gut-wrenching and nearly painful, possibly the worst it’s been in awhile.

“Whoa, is everything alright?” Gale asks, rubbing my back as I’m hunched over. “It’s okay. Do what you need to do.”

“Whatever is causing you to feel this way, I’m going to punch it in the fucking head,” Karlach says. “I would expect this if you came across Cloudkill or something atrocious like that. Have you been around any disgusting spells like that recently?”

“Not at all,” I mumble. “I think it’s a stomach bug, but…much worse.”

“I feel like a failure. I’ve failed you. I’m a wizard who has studied the arcane since I was young, yet I can’t heal or cure you whatsoever,” Gale says, sighing as he continues to rub my back. “I’m so sorry.”

“That’s just the thing,” Shadowheart chimes in. “Magic may not be able to help her at all. At least not this time.” I take a deep breath and close my eyes, trying to fight off the sickness that’s overwhelming my body. So going by Shadowheart's words, magic can only help in certain conditions? I have so much I still need to understand; I should have studied the arcane growing up. However, my natural desire was to help others, cure those in pain, and bring light into the sinister world of darkness. It seems I can’t help myself unfortunately.

“I’ll be okay. I have waves where I feel totally fine, though most of the time I think I’ll throw up. In fact, I have at least six times today.” In Faerȗn, illnesses are surprisingly rare due to the magic and healing spells that cure just about anything. If there is no spell, there’s surely a potion for it. Either way, magic has not been able to cure whatever this atrocity is.

After my insane episode of sickness, I finally feel a little better after about twenty minutes and we continue forward on our adventure. The scent of spearmint in the wild somewhere relieves me, and I feel somewhat normal again – thank the stars.

“So Shadowheart, how have you been?” Gale asks. “I’m sure it’s been a wild ride exploring the depths of every mountain, city, and forest you can possibly imagine.”

“You know, as much as I enjoy it and find new places to discover… It gets lonely. However, I’m faring quite well. But, good news on that front, I found a place in Waterdeep and moved here a couple days ago. I’ll be slowing down on my adventures for a while,” she says, inhaling the forest air. “I’m glad I will be around some familiar faces.” This just made my entire day, knowing Shadowheart lives close to us and I’ll have someone to hang out with while Gale is teaching at the Academy. Finally, adult interaction!

As we all continue to walk the long and familiar dirt path to Baldur’s Gate, I notice glossy splotches of newly shed blood on some large rocks just a few feet away from us, remembering all the lives I took. Granted, they were well deserved, but nonetheless it affects me sometimes. Just because they were warranted doesn’t mean I’m not affected. Someone or something just got murdered here within the last hour or two. I sigh, trying not to focus too hard on the blood splatters around us. After a moment, I began to smile, realizing how many lives we ended up saving and that we were the heroes of Baldur’s Gate. We still are. All of the violence toward the evil beings was worth it, though I do question myself every now and again.

“Are you alright, baby?” Gale asks. His voice is so soft like a lullaby. If only it were a cure for my unfortunate illness.

“Yes, I’m more than alright.” Part of me is so excited to get to the city. Maybe I’ll see some familiar faces, and hopefully I’ll get the answers I’m looking for.

[cafecourage]

The moment they realized they loved you. (Isekai Au Edition) Part 2

If you want more information on this AU here is the Link!

Sky:

- It started slow and very sweet.

- He took a long time realizing who you were. But he still believed in the others when they started to recognize you.

- When your behind him cheering you on, he feels invincible. Since during his adventure Impa tore into him pretty badly when he was late to save Zelda.

- Your presence is comforting to him. It feels like home despite being on the ground.

___________________________________

Being back in Skyloft was a small blessing for the chain. The tight knit community had already welcomed the travelers with little to no questions about their origins. It was a stroke of luck that they landed in front of the bazaar in the early morning when no one else was up yet. Their first day there was a resting day in attempt to gather information on the black blood monsters and inventory checks.

Sky took his time catching up with everyone. Letting the Headmaster and Sun know about the situation that had the hero hopping around in the timeline. Then he needed to go down to the small settlement on the surface to check on them. Sun did already tell him that things where still safe down there and that he should take a break. But he still would rather check it out himself just in case something did happen it better to be safe than sorry.

Despite being able to jump off from any of the decks in Skyloft. He automatically went towards the plaza near the tower of light. During his adventure it was the quickest way to the opening above Faron Woods. Sky was just turning the bend when he saw his Loftwing was already there on the docks and under its wing was You. You were trying to put a small amount of distance between you and the bird but the creature kept bring you closer to hold.

“(Y/n)!” Sky was baffled at his Loftwings reactions to you. He dashes to your side. “I’m so sorry. He isn’t normally like this.”

“It’s fine.” Your uncontrollable laughter the was full with childlike glee finally reached him. “In fact, I think he recognizes me!” You whispered smiling. The Crimson Loftwing cooed now leaning into his masters touch as Sky softly pet the side of his necks. Sky wondered if what you said was the truth. Since a Loftwing and its rider do share a special connection, it’s fully possible that his also felt and heard you. “Hey Link?” Suddenly your demeanor changed. “Can I ask something?”

Your bashful and embarrassed expression made Sky feel soft inside. “Of course.”

“One of these days can you show me around the sky or the surface?” You shifted awkwardly from him. He actually forgot that you haven’t physically been to his era before. That for the longest time you only saw things from his point of view without the ability to truly explore anything. “You don’t need to- “

“Are you free now?” He quickly cut you off. “I was actually heading down there now to check on the settlement.”

“Really?” Your face seems to brighten but then you remembered something and leaned closer to him whispering again “I don’t have a Loftwing though.”

He gently takes your hand “my Loftwing is strong enough for both of us.” He guided you to his side. You eyed the bird with uncertainty but you let him help you up onto the harness. Sky got on behind you reaching around you to get the reins. “Hold on to me if you get scared.” He teasingly warned and before you could question him. His Loftwing took off nose diving off of the deck.

You let out a small squeak as you latched onto his tunic. Sky almost felt bad that he actually scared you. But once in the air and on a steady path you finally opened your eyes again. “Woah!” The sight was nothing special but it was still just as beautiful. The clouds below them created an endless sea of white. “It’s so pretty.” Pride bubbled up as Sky watch you taken in the beauty of his home. This was just the start of what he wanted to show you as different locations came into his mind. “Hey.” You looking over your shoulder with hope in your eyes. ”Next time can we go to the Lumpy Pumpkin? I remember you singing high praises about their pumpkin soup.”

Sky tried to think of what he wanted to do tomorrow, right now there wasn’t anything that needed his attention. “If we have time tomorrow, I can take you there for lunch or dinner.” Maybe he could take a break from being a hero for a bit.

“Great! It’s a date then.” You sent a wink his way that sent his brain into a haywire before looking back into the endless sky. He was lucky his Loftwing is able to steer himself. As dot’s where finally connecting in Sky’s head. Pure love and affection bubble up as he embraces his new found feelings.

- He will be the one to uno reverse card on you. All love and affection will drown you instead. There was so much he wanted to tell you before to thank you for being by his side and encouraging him.

- Cuddle time will start here because of his need to make sure you know your loved too.

- He would be the one to confess first, but it would probably be played off as friends telling each other that they love each other.

- You’re not dense but overly affectionate. He might just need to spell out how you make him feel on a daily basis. Maybe then you’ll understand what you’re doing to him.

___________________________________

Legend:

- It hit him like a freight train.

- He isn’t mad at you. He is mad at himself. He had made his dues with what the people he had lost. Yet here he is. Already going too far.

- Your ability to make the situation brighter slowly eroded the walls he put up years ago.

- It might be all in his head, but he swears that you always make sure his needs are met even if he is trying to hide them.

___________________________________

“Link!!!” You barreled towards him ignoring the questioning stares the people of Windfall Island. “Link! Link! Link! LOOK!!!” You hold up a pink rabbit stuffed animal that you bought. “It you!”

The veteran in question huffed, “seriously of all things.” He turned on his heels “I’m going back on the ship.” He didn’t know why he was still entertaining your antics at that point.

“Wha- Hey! I was joking!” They were stocking up in Windfall and Legend was not happy to be on a boat nor in the ocean again. He wouldn’t say that he afraid.

Just… cautious…

You on the other hand looked like you were having the time of your life on the ship talking the it’s Captain and crew member’s. Yet most of the time you would stay by his side. The reason was obvious but nether wanted to talk about it.

Which is why you dragged him out to the port island. ‘An easy distraction.’ You told him, ‘I can show you around so we won’t get lost!’ He wasn’t worried about that. Legend trusted you. A fact he will never say out loud. However, he would rather hole up somewhere and escape the world then be here.

A soft hand took his when Legend reached the docks. He already knew who it was since you’ve been following him like a lost puppy all day. “One more place please?” You looked at him expectingly. “Then you can go back.”

“What are you a child? Why can’t you just go alone?” Legend snapped back, “you don’t have to be around me.”

“Legend I like being with you.” You pointed out like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “However.” You let go of his hand. “I also understand if you don’t want to hang out anymore and want to go rest.” There was no fighting back. No offense to his words. Nothing. Just a warm smile that filled him with warmth, that was accompanied by words fueled by unlimited care and understanding which made his heart beat faster. The silence between you two seemed to give you an answer. You turned around. A panicked feeling shot through. Legend was surprised with himself when he almost reached out to you when you walked away.

Instead, he watched you go. In the wake of his own emotions, he realized what had been happening. How he has been acting around you was starting to get familiar. “Not again.” He whispered disappointed in himself.

___________________________________

- Legend is going to be bitter about it. He isn’t going to take it out on you, but his mannerisms are going to be different after this.

- Not quite closed off, but it’s almost like he is mourning another loss.

- You would need to drown him in love and affection before he realizes you like him back. But like Twilight, he is going to be heartbroken if you decide to leave him to go back home.

___________________________________

Wild:

- Its progression was as natural as breathing.

- He just got off of his adventure so he always had you by his side. Just being near you is second nature.

- If anything, he was more than excited to actually have you physically be here alongside him.

- It rare to see ether of you not near each other when traveling together you two are inseparable.

___________________________________

The only upside of being in Wild’s Era is that the champion knew what to expect, it’s chaotic was normal for him and actually brought him a bit of peace. You came with that peace of mind. Having you join the chain to him was almost like you never left his side in the first place. From the moment he woke up after being told his name and what he needed to from Zelda, he was aware of your presence. You were the one to encourage him to explore the ruin kingdom. You were the one to recognize structures that the people in his world didn’t know about. The weird part was that you didn’t know how he was before the calamity, but he didn’t question that fact too much. He was more than happy to have someone treat him as a different person from before.

Now having you physically with him. Wild wanted to bring you to all of your favorite locations that you vocally told him about.

But that had to wait for now, because the downside to Wild’s Hyrule was the amount of things that wanted him dead. Moblins? Bokablins? Those guys are fine to fight they were push overs unless infected with the black blood. Actually, most of Wild’s monsters were like that. Once you get a hang of fighting them and recognize their patterns. They are a breeze.

A common threat that was annoy to deal with however, was the Yiga Clan. Which leads to the situation Wild and the others found themselves getting in while on the road to Hateno. He should of figured that they were going to strike when he got back to his Era. But he honestly didn’t think it would be in this quantity they were out number but thanks to Warriors taking control of the situation where managing. He was trying to make sure everyone was accounted for and was alive when he heard a string of curses coming from his right.

You had been knocked on the ground by a Blade Master. Your sword was near the clan member. Wild felt his world freeze in that moment as he bolted towards your body. With a falcon bow in hand. Wild side jumped. Locked in an ancient arrow and let it go.

The arrow sped towards the Blade Master. Hitting him directly. Turning the Yiga member into a bunch of Sheikah blue ribbons before collapsing into an orb where the arrow hit.

Wild slide towards your body. A pulse he needed to feel a pulse. Placing the tips of his index and middle finger on the base of your thumb and wrist. He pressed lightly to feel the blood pulsing beneath his fingers. A sigh of relief escaped him. Wild was lucky that the battle had come to an end. As the other Yiga members ether retreated in horror of what happened to one of their own or cut down quickly.

Hyrule join him soon after shooing him out of the way gently. Wild didn’t move from your side all that much. He didn’t want to. Just in case you left him too. He doesn’t know a life without you in it. A world like that just doesn’t exist.

Wild knows the name of the cause of his feelings. It’s the same thing that drives him to share his experience with you. He wants to be by your side and to make you happy.

___________________________________

- He is protective but not controlling. If anything, he wants to spar with you more. So, you can get better at fighting.

- You can bet he is going to start making you taste the different foods he had discovered, or sneak out to visit areas in his world more often. He doesn’t want you to miss a thing.

- There is so much he wants to do with you. So much he wants to share. So many things to say. That he just wants to do it all at once so there can be new things you both can discover together.

(Part 1)

[snelbz]

Life As We Know It {Chapter 9}

Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.

Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.

Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays and Thursdays. Chapters will be posted on both my and Shelby’s blogs! >> @snelbz​

Life As We Know It Masterlist

Shelby’s Masterlist

Tara’s Masterlist

A/N: SURPRISE. Enjoy this chapter a day early. I had my days wrong and legit thought it was Thursday, but since it was ready…. Y’all get to enjoy the spoils of my frazzled brain. 😘

Nesta waited with Nyx in the waiting room of the pediatric office.

His rash didn’t seem to be bothering him much, but she wanted to get ahead of it before it became a problem. He was absolutely enamored with the TV playing a bright children’s show in the corner, and Nesta couldn’t help but smile down at him as she checked her email.

The usual stuff greeted her, some open catering order invoices for the restaurant, a few wayward resumes from high school kids that had managed to get her personal email, and, of course, spam.

“Nyx?”

Nesta’s head shot up, and Nyx began looking around, wondering who had called his name. Nesta was instantly on her feet, pushing Nyx’s stroller toward the door that the nurse held open.

She smiled. “Hello, Nyx.”

Nyx babbled in greeting.

The nurse chuckled. “Such a cute little guy. You’re Nesta, I assume?”

“I am,” Nesta confirmed. “I’ve not been here before. It’s a nice office.”

The small talk went on. Nesta had never been a fan of small talk, of polite pleasantries.

It just made her feel awkward.

Nyx didn’t seem to mind. He just kept babbling and babbling and babbling, without a care in the world.

The nurse led them into a room and she checked Nyx’s height and weight before telling them that the doctor would be there shortly.

Nesta had picked Nyx up, looking around at all the educational posters on the walls, when a quick knock sounded on the door and a man cracked open the door.

Nesta blinked once as he stepped inside, not expecting the tall, muscled man that appeared in front of her.

“You must be Nesta,” he said, extending his hand. “I’m Dr. Kamaras.”

This man was Nyx’s pediatrician? She had known that Nyx’s doctor was male, Feyre had mentioned him in some stories a few times, but Nesta had always pictured an elderly man.

Not this sculpted, handsome man, who could easily graced the cover of one of the ridiculous smutty books she kept well hidden in her bedroom.

She shook his hand, finally remembering how to speak. “Yes, I am, it’s nice to meet you.”

Very nice to meet you, she added in her head.

His face sombered. “I was very sorry to hear about Rhys and Feyre. They were great people.”

And just like that, Nesta was back on earth, holding her sister’s son in her arms, standing where her sister should have been. She tried to keep her smiling from dimming, but she cleared her throat. “Thank you. It’s…been an adjustment.”

As if they both remembered why they were here, Dr. Karamas blinked and said, “Yes, Nyx, right. You told the nurse he has a rash of some sort?”

“It’s just a diaper rash but it seems to be getting infected,” Nesta explained. “I’ve tried a few different things but nothing seems to be working.”

“Ah,” he said, nodding. “Well, let’s take a look.”

Dr. Karamas took one glance and whistled. “Definitely infected. I’m going to give you a steroid cream. Put it on after every diaper change. It should clear up within the week.”

Nesta let loose a breath. “Oh, great, thank you.”

“Absolutely,” he smiled.

He had a nice smile.

He scribbled something down on his clipboard, signed it, and handed it to Nesta. “The number on the bottom is my office number. If you have any other concerns, no matter how small, give it a call.”

Nesta looked at Nyx’s prescription and the number that was beneath it, along with his name.

Balthazar Karamas.

“Thank you, Dr. Karamas,” Nesta said, and she meant it. She was still new at this, and every little medical thing concerned her.

If it wasn’t normal, she was freaking the fuck out.

“Bal, please,” he said, taking her hand again, shaking it. At the look on her face, he added, “I work with kids. They do better on a familiar name basis than with titles like doctor and mister.”

She nodded, smiling. “Bal, then.”

Nesta was getting Nyx resituated in his stroller in the waiting room, about to head back out into the bright sunlight, when she felt someone approach. She wasn’t expecting to find Balthazar standing a few feet away. She quickly checked the stroller, making sure she had her purse, the diaper bag, and, of course, Nyx himself. “Did I forget something?” She asked, finding everything exactly where it was supposed to be.

“No, no, it’s not that,” he said, pausing in front of her. “I just…can’t shake the feeling that I know you from somewhere.”

It was strange, since Nesta felt the same way.

“You’re not Illyrian,” he said, and it wasn’t a question, nor was it rude. Just an assumption. She only knew of a few other Illyrians in the area, and Balthazar definitely had the same coloring as Cassian and Az. And Rhys used to have. She, pale skinned and blue eyed, certainly did not.

“I’m not,” she said, at last.

Bal chuckled.

That smile, yet again, had her toes curling.

“Interesting,” he said, that smile remaining. “Well, maybe we can figure out just where we’ve run into each other before...over lunch this weekend?”

Nesta blinked. A date?

“Not a date,” he said, quickly, reading her mind. “I would never ask the aunt of my patient on a date. That would be incredibly unprofessional.” Nesta laughed. “Just…two acquaintances figuring out where they were previously acquainted.”

“Lunch sounds nice,” Nesta said, unable to shake her own smile. “Saturday, then?”

“Saturday,” Bal agreed.

They set up a time and place and then Nesta was out the door.

*

Cassian’s day had been as long as it was the day before. It seemed that the teenagers visiting Velaris had gotten the message from their friends that Cassian’s bar was checking every single ID of every single drink that was ordered. So instead of being slammed and busy and frustrated the whole day, he had been bored out of his mind.

He’d gone through his inventory sheets twice, ordering anything they might remotely run out of in the next few weeks.

It didn’t help that Kallias had the day off, covering the evening shift tonight, leaving him alone with his thoughts all day.

And those thoughts constantly reminded him that he’d been an absolute dick to Nesta the night before.

As he drove home, he contemplated the apology he needed to make.

Although Cassian believed his intentions were typically good, apologizing wasn’t one of his strengths. He ran through what he’d say a hundred times, had come up with an unbearable amount of ways in which he could apologize, but everything he thought of wasn’t good enough.

He knew Nesta well enough to know when she would laugh in his face.

He’d come up with about fifteen different scenarios of how this could go by the time he pulled into the driveway, parking next to her little car. He took a deep breath before unlocking the front door and letting himself in.

The house was quiet, neither Nesta or Nyx were anywhere to be found. It was barely six-thirty, but he knew Nesta was taking Nyx to the doctor earlier in the day, which may have tired him out so thoroughly that he was already down for the night. A peek into his cracked bedroom door confirmed it, his little hand curled next his face as he slept.

When he finally tracked down Nesta, on the back patio, her feet propped up in a lounge chair, he definitely hadn’t expected to find her with a bottle of wine. Or what was left of it, at least.

The mostly empty bottle of wine sat next to the baby monitor.

He cleared his throat, announcing his presence.

Nesta’s sigh was the only acknowledgement she showed.

“Everything alright?” He asked.

She shrugged and took a sip from her glass.

“Bad day?” He continued.

She shrugged again.

“Is this the silent treatment?” He asked.

“I assume you’d know,” she said.

Cassian began rubbing his temples. “Look, Nesta-.”

“I’m a little busy if you don’t mind,” she continued. “I prefer to relax alone.”

“This is my house, too,” he said, shutting the sliding door behind him as he made his way onto the patio. “What if I want to sit out here with you?”

“Then I’d suggest continuing the silence,” she said, not looking at him, her face tilting back up to the sky, where it had been when he’d come outside.

So he sat down on a nearby lounge chair, and didn’t say a word.

Or he tried, but he didn’t last five minutes. The words that had building inside him all day needed to come out. He’d rehearsed different things he wanted to say, with reasons for why he was such an asshole, and promises to try and be better from now on. But as he looked over at her, the starlight on her face, all he could get out was, “I’m sorry.”

For a moment, Nesta said nothing. “About?”

“The way I acted last night,” he replied, keeping his eyes on the lawn. “It was uncalled for, and I’m sorry.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” she said, draining her glass.

Cassian’s eyes shot her direction. “I’m trying to apologize. You can at least accept my apology so we can move on.”

“Apologies mean nothing,” Nesta said, shrugging. “Words are meaningless.”

“Not mine,” Cassian argued. “I mean what I say.”

“Then you meant what you said last night?” Nesta pushed.

Cassian’s lips snapped shut and his jaw hardened. “No.”

“So, you’re a liar, then?” Nesta asked.

He groaned in frustration. “You’re infuriating.”

She didn’t deign to reply to that.

He took a deep breath. “I’m sorry I was an asshole last night. I was…embarrassed about how you found me the night before. I don’t… I don’t like to be seen like that.” He paused, but then he held a hand out in between them. “Not- not that that happens often. I mean, I don’t make a habit of having emotional breakdowns.”

She didn’t say anything. Just stared at him.

He cleared his throat again, remembering little things he had felt badly about through the day. “Nesta, I’m sorry I acted like an ass. I’m sorry I didn’t appreciate the dinner you made me. I was rude as hell and you did nothing to deserve it.”

After a second, she glanced away, out over the pool. He figured she wasn’t going to reply, and he stood, heading back for the back door.

He had slid the door open and was halfway inside when she said, “If you’re hungry, I made lasagna for dinner. It should still be warm on the stove.”

He turned back and found a hint of a smile on her face. “Thanks, Nes.”

*

A continuation of his apology, Cassian had told Nesta he'd be on baby duty for the rest of the night, waking Nyx up for his bottle, granting her leave to do whatever she wanted. She elected to finish off the bottle of wine, open another, and relax in the bathtub with a book.

The book of choice was definitely not appropriate to read in front of Nyx.

Or Cassian, for that matter.

She had appreciated his apology, even though a part of her still wanted to be pissed. There were very few things that agitated her more than male bravado, and Cassian was the spitting image of it. Embarrassed because he was emotional? Please. Get the fuck over it.

Then again, she could say that all day, but in honesty, if the positions were reversed, she would have reacted very, very similarly.

If not worse.

Nesta had always felt too much, far more than either of her sisters. It wasn’t like they were robots, of course. Elain had a bigger heart than anyone Nesta had ever known, and Feyre had been a light to be around.

But, Nesta…

She felt it all, and she felt it far too deeply. She had learned long ago to shut those emotions off, to let them go, to not let her emotions show. They could just be used as a weakness.

And she found life worked better that way.

There was a soft knock on the bathroom door.

Nesta sat up straight, even though the door was locked, in a sudden panic over the fact that she was nude and reading smut.

“Yeah?”

“Nyx is going to bed,” he said. “Just thought you’d want to say goodnight.”

“I- Ah- Just a minute,” she called, setting the book down and reaching down to grab for her towel. She was out and damn near opened the door in just her towel again, but remembered their agreed upon rules. She snatched her robe, wrapping it around herself, towel and all.

She opened the door, Cassian standing just by her bed, and Nyx had his head resting on his shoulder, rubbing his little eyes.

The image was so pure and innocent that Nesta couldn’t stop herself from taking a few steps towards them, reaching out to brush her fingers down Nyx’s soft cheek. “Sweet dreams, buddy,” she breathed, leaning up to press a kiss to his forehead.

She regretted it almost immediately, as bringing herself that close in Nyx also inadvertently brought her to Cassian. His heady, nutmeg-and-campfire scent enveloping her, reminding her of the morning she’d come downstairs and found him as naked as she was now. She stepped back quickly, clearing her throat. “And goodnight to you, Cassian,” she murmured. She pointed back behind her towards the bathtub, towards her book, and said, “I’m going to read a little longer and then go to bed myself.”

He nodded. “Alright, I’ll see you in the morning. Goodnight, Nes.”

The nickname didn’t bother her as much as it previously had, she realized as he made his way back out of her room, shutting the door behind him.

She didn’t let herself think about that, did her best not to think about him, as she sunk back into the warm water.

*

Nyx had gone down easily for Cassian, for the first time ever, thanks to the frozen toy he’d gnawed on to relieve the pain of his incoming tooth. He’d decided he deserved a treat, too, after that, and had sat down to watch the hockey game, a beer in hand.

Fifteen minutes later, there was a knock at the front door.

Cassian paused, glancing down at his watch, seeing that it was pushing nine o’clock. He stood, after a second knock sounded, making his way to the door. He opened it to find a woman dressed in a suit on the other side. “Can I help you?”

“Mr. Nazari, I assume?” She asked, extending her hand.

He took it, on instinct, shaking it, but he blinked. He repeated, “Yeah… Can I help you?”

Her brows twitched together. “My name is Alis Birch. I’m with social services.”

Cassian continued to shake her hand, staring.

“The courts told you we’d be making random visits to check in on Nyx,” she continued.

Oh, fuck, Cassian thought. Oh, fucking hell.

They’d completely forgotten about those random visits, in the past few weeks they’d been doing this, distracted by getting used to not only being parents, but getting used to each other as well.

“I see,” Cassian said, nodding. “I… I’ll…be right back.”

“I’d like to come in-.”

Cassian shut the door, quickly set his beer on the table in the entryway, and hauled ass upstairs.

He threw open the door to Nesta’s bedroom, only to found it empty, so he continued on, throwing open the bathroom door.

Where Nesta was still in the tub, completely nude, a book in hand, one hand disappeared beneath the water. Her head was thrown back in utter ecstasy.

Until Cassian barged in, anyway.

“Shit!” he yelled, just as Nesta gasped and sent the water sloshing out of the tub, over the porcelain edges.

Cassian quickly shut the door behind him, closing them into the bathroom together, and put his face in his hands. “Sorry!”

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” she yelled, and he could hear her pulling the plug.

“It’s important, I swear,” he said, his voice muffled by his hands.

“If the house isn’t on fire or Nyx isn’t dying, it’s not important,” she cried, ducking behind the walls of the tub.

“It’s pretty fucking important,” he said, turning to give her a semblance of privacy. He heard her stand up, water moving and quiet dripping, before her feet landed on the rug outside the tub. “The social worker is here.”

She froze and he dared a look back at her. Thankfully, she was wrapped in her towel again, one arm pushed through her robe. “The social worker is here? Now?” He nodded, and she looked at the nearly empty bottle of wine next to the glass on the small table by the tub. It was the second one she’d had that night. “But it’s late,” she protested.

“It’s a random, surprise visit,” he replied. “I left her outside, but-.”

“You didn’t let her in?” Nesta demanded, eyes widening. “Cauldron, Cass, that makes us look so guilty.”

He blinked. “Of what?”

“I don’t know,” she said, throwing her hands in the air. “But it doesn’t make us look good.”

“Well, I didn’t know what to do,” he sighed, exasperatedly. “I sure as hell wasn’t expecting to come up here and find you doing that.” He gestured to the tub.

Nesta’s cheeks heated. He figured his own were going to permanently be the shade of red they were now.

No, that was the last thing he ever expected to catch Nesta doing.

“Just… Go let her in and stall her while I get dressed,” she sighed, crossing her arms, waiting for him to leave.

Cassian hesitated, then nodded, and hurried back down the stairs. When he reopened the front door, Alis Birch stood there. Her expression was hard, intimidating.

Cassian could feel himself sweat.

He prayed that Nesta somehow sobered up and got the fuck downstairs, because there was no way in hell he could do this without her.