#a man can hope alright
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I think I have a crush on the haiku bot I just love it so much
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Vanha Kauppahalli date: en full, a 2 minute 50 second masterpiece...
Primetime Panthers | 11.6.24 (x)
#aleksander barkov#matthew tkachuk#florida panthers#2425#the global series is a gift#“alright talk to me what do we got?” with the camera following behind them makes it seems like theyre spies doing reconnaissance#the start to a thriller where they got sent to finland stake out for intelligence#maffhew not even waiting for sasha to answer before hes asks about chocolate#“the purple one you always bring” maffhew has been charmed by sashas leaving choco in stalls as gifts when he comes back from finland huh#you can tell he says that with depravity of a man who finally realises he doesnt need to rely on his supplier he can get it himself now#“uh oh [laughs] okay... what is this?” maffhew was not prepared for all the food to already be ready for him he just hopped off a plane and#expected to have to wait more and did not and absolutely does not trust the situation in the same way you get romantic candlelit-dinnered#and youre like alright whats all this then whats your angle what are you doing#“this is salmon and rye bread 😄” “(with the eagerness to prove hes smart and engaged) so is that 👉” “(charmed) and so is that 🫱”#“ill try your favourite first” GURL RELAX OKAY SETTLE DOWN YOURE IN A NEW COUNTRY JUST CHILL MAN#“salmon and rye bread—thats the famous one 🤓” [sasha nodding along because he has to reassure maffhew but also hes in the middle of eating]#maffhew choosing the most inopportune time and you can TELL sasha is like [swallows quickly] because he wants to answer but also BIG BITE#“herring” “herrin' 🤠?” “eating all this her-RING” no notes#“is this just another salmon on rye bread” he says with hope because he likes salmon but also disappointment (he wants to try more foods)#“different salmon? smoked?” the amount of questions hes askijg because hes so terribly engaged he wants to know and sashas like [shrug]#he has to get an A+ in experiencing finland which is normal to want and possible to achieve#“i still love your country though” and sasha explodes into the mirthful grin ive seen in my life like he just won the damn jackpot#he speaks at 100 mph like please take a deep breath sweetheart youre excitement is papable but PLEASE#THE WAY HE GETS SO UNSURE WHEN HE MENTIONS BARKY HATES THAT FOOD WHEN HE LIKED IT SO MUCH#MAFFHEW YOU CAN GET A PASSING GRADE IN EXPERIENCING FINLAND IF YOU STICK TO YOUR GUNS I PROMISE#SASHA HELP A GUY OUT HERE MAN THROW HIM A BONE#SASHA ONLY LAUGHS AS MAFFHEW THROWS HIMSELF INTO A TIZZY OVER THIS YOU ARE SOOOOOO#the chuckle when sasha mentions he had runebergin torttu in school... id like to know what was funny there#we call out sasha for being too lovesick and laughing at all of maffhews “jokes” BUT HES JUST AS BAD???#“what the hell do i do with this thing?” MAFFHEW HAVE YOU NEVER SEEN MERENGUE IN YOUR LIFE???
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instead of nightmare approaching horror to recruit him for the gang i think it would be cooler if he talked to undyne about it. because she would not hesitate TWICE to ship horror off to fuck knows where in the multiverse
like booo booo boring horror would never cooperate and agree to join nightmare without him doing some extra work that he cant be bothered 2 do bc its doesn't benefit him enough 4 the effort put in. AND THAT METHOD DOESN'T EVEN GIVE HIM MORE NEGATIVITY!!!!! nonono the king deserves a show :3 so he goes to undyne who's the craziest of everyone in horrortale and yk yk does some stupid mind manipulation. maybe in exchange for horror he makes up some bullshit lie about how he could save alphys (is she even alive atp) or the rest of the underground and provide them food (like the same deal that nightmare WOULD offer horror) and undynes like 70x more fucked up than horror so of course she's accept in a heartbeat. shes the queen!!!! shes supposed to provide for her subjects (even tho shes kinda. erm. making them all suffer)!!!! and all it would take was a sacrifice of the guy she lowkey doesn't like??? undyne has more reason to accept a deal like that from nm than horror ever would. and it wouldnt be the first time she sacrificed horror anyways lol
idk she sends royal guards out to snatch up horror in the middle of the day (nightmare told her to make it dramatic and tense :3) (all of snowdin would probably follow in concern because OMG WHERE IS SANS GOING????) and then yeah. just like that horrors gone! nightmare probably didn't even give him a chance to say bye to paps. undyne never ends up getting the food nightmare promised because hes a bitchass like that (and papyrus probably ends up taking up the full leader role of food provider for snowdin (if undyne even lets snowdin stay out of her control) good luck for him!)
if horror had a nickel for everytime he got forced to be a sacrifice he'd have 2 nickels. which is actually 2 too much in his eye HES PISSED!!!!!! rightfully so become man ☹️ taken away from his world without even a choice or a reason (to his knowledge) or anything to benefit him??? and now hes STUCK in this disney movie castle with two freaks who look like him (what the FUCK) and then the most annoying THING he's ever had the misfortune of getting kidnapped by. he is in misery. it sucks. he IS infact bitter. if he ever came back to horrortale (which he literally would never get to without dying or losing his stolen eye) he would 500% commit anarchy and finally get rid of undynes annoying ass ‼️‼️
#horror gets to join killer in the forcefully kidnapped into the gang group#would horror lose hope of ever getting back to horrortale???? yeah probably :3#unlike dust he doesn't have dt so he would NAUGHT be that persistent#dust would die trying getting back to dusttale. horror would just want to die after not being able to get back#unlike dust (debatable) or killer (he's done all he can do to help his world and wants to move on) horror still has attatchments in his au#i KNOW the constant thought that snowdin is starving without him HAUNTS him like a plaugue#im like 80% sure horrortale would not survive without horror. it would implode without horror to keep undyne somewhat in check#NOOOO because like what if it was after Aliza manages to help all of horrortale???? like undyne#like she manages to get through the undyne somehow and everything seems to be going up slowly#horror FOR ONCE has hope for everyone again and then nightmare comes in and undoes ALLLL of aliza's progress!!!!!!#THE HOPE GETTING RIPPED AWAY FROM HORROR AFTER SEEING THINGS RECOVERING WOULD DESTROY HIM (maybe idk)#can just imagine killer having to be on suicide watch for horror bc nm can tell he's in a bad mood bc of that hope#killer doesnt have to be on suicide watch for dust bc he wont let himself die if his human still exists but horror?????#horror would not have the same will that dust and killer do. he tries to jump off buildings every mission#horror leaning off a ledge and killer's just holding onto his hood like man stop it this is wasteful and pointless#why does he keep trying to kill himself and have to make killer deal with this. cant horror just like get the fuck over it and do his job#anyways dust and horror exchanging stories about their aus and reminiscing about things before it all went bad#horror gets pissy anytime dust makes an offhand comment tying his story about the genos#dust completely ignores him when horror mentions something about the famine and how it fucked everything up#they rather just take this moment to pretend everything is alright in their memories#in that moment its almost like looking into a mirror. ok triglycercule getting a bit TOO poetic there#horrordust seeing sans in eachother only when they talk about their pasts and making it a way to deal with all thats changed#tricule hc#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#nightmare sans#murder time trio#bad sanses#nightmare's gang
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Let's Talk About Lincoln And His Dads, Okay?
I think people claiming that Lincoln and Grant "aren't so different after all" because, like everyone else in the show, they both have blood on their hands, have mostly missed the mark on where the core of Lincoln's issues with his dad(s) lie in the first place.
Moreover, I'm tired of people insinuating that Lincoln's troubles pale in comparison to Normal's or Scary's or Hermie's, and I'm tired of people saying that Lincoln is overreacting, or that Lincoln is a hypocrite for calling out his dad's behavior, or that he is in the wrong for setting boundaries, or that he's ungrateful, or that he's responsible for ensuring his dad's emotional wellbeing and not the other way around!
*breathes* So let's. Let's finally talk about Lincoln and Grant (and Marco also him).
[WOAH THERE! Hey you, yeah you, this is a long-ass post, mhm, it's one of those, so please keep that in mind before venturing below the cut. Maybe grab yourself a drink or a bite to eat first, yeah? Additionally, sorry the transcript stuff is a bit messy in this one, tumblr has a 30 image limit and well, I had to find workarounds. Also, I haven't yet added alt text for the transcript screenshots- I plan to when I have a bit more energy for it, but I apologize for any inconvenience this may cause in the meantime!]
Part 1/4: "Honesty is hardly ever heard, and mostly what I need from you"
Lincoln is certainly a pacifist at heart (in more recent times important examples of this include Lincoln's refusal to harm Scary in the Swallows household, as well as Lincoln being the only one of the teens to successfully avoid using violence in front of d00d during their most recent standoff with Willy), and in good paladin fashion functions as the group's moral compass the majority of the time.
Despite this, Lincoln's morals are not so simplistic and idealistic as to not differentiate between different motives for violence, nor does he view acts of violence in and of themselves as signs that a person is "evil" or "irredeemable". He can for example, see the difference between the acts of Willy and those of the kiddads, as he tries to explain when confronted by the other teens on the matter:
In fact, even after Grant tells Linc all of this during the incursion:
Lincoln's primary goal is still to save his dad first and foremost, then offer him the room to explain himself, without immediately chalking him up as a bad person because of what he has done.
Lincoln certainly doesn't approve of Grant and his violence, though he can understand that things are seldom black and white. But the killing is far from the only issue here. In fact, it's not even the main issue.
Grant creates a foundation based on trust and accountability whose importance in the Li-Wilson household is hammered in from the very first episode.
And we see throughout the early episodes of the season just how strongly Lincoln believes that Grant would never lie to him.
Then of course the incursion point encounter happens. There are several elements of this encounter that we will gloss over for now and go back to later, but of immediate importance is the fact that this interaction serves as direct confirmation for Lincoln that his dad has in fact been lying to him his entire life.
Additionally, he learns that Grant possesses a deep hatred of himself, wants to die, perceives himself as "broken beyond repair", and fears that Lincoln will somehow wind up just like him. That's a lot for one kid to have dropped on them, let alone all at once and without warning!
So- Lincoln wants to confront his dad after this both because he wants his dad to explain himself and take accountability for his dishonesty and for his actions more generally, and because he is concerned for his dad's wellbeing.
Now let's look at how Grant has, over the course of the season, responded to Lincoln's attempts to get him to take responsibility for his actions, and talk about his mental health:
The first thing Grant does is pull a classic Wilson "we'll talk about it later". Then the very next thing he does is lie to Lincoln again, now pretending that his plan is to fix things with Erin by offering her a gift (when of course he's actually set out to steal the sun)
Then as a deflection when Lincoln further tries to confront him about the lying, he indirectly equates everything he has kept secret from Lincoln (see the incursion point stuff) to "little white lies" and, contrary to the philosophy he so heavily instilled in Lincoln, argues that sometimes lying can protect the people one cares about:
Which as a point of interest I would like to compare and contrast to something Lincoln says in an earlier episode:
"lies can protect" vs "protecting is also trusting"- anyways moving on,
From there Grant's plan to steal the sun eventually comes to light (heh) and gets foiled, forcing the teens to be the mature ones in the situation and try to negotiate something with Erin. While he is certainly disappointed by everything going on, however, Lincoln's priorities vis-à-vis Grant are still, first and foremost, to ensure that he is safe, and when time allows for it get an apology from him and get him to talk openly about everything he has withheld. At this point in time Lincoln, while obviously angry at his dad, still very clearly cares about his dad and just wants to be able to talk with him without all the lies or deflection or excuses.
Then the teens are backed into a corner when their attempts at negotiation go sour, and ultimately wind up helping Grant steal the sun. Once that is over, Lincoln tries to confront his dad again, now with regards to some of the things he said about himself:
(Do note that last bit especially as it will be of relevance in the next section)
Then after Grant ignores the other teens when they try to talk to him, Lincoln calls him out and once again asks him to apologize, in part for having told Lincoln previously that they were dangerous and that he was not to hang out with them:
(as you might have guessed, Grant does not apologize).
Then it is established that the "zone of truth" in the Li-Wilson household isn't actually a spell but an agreed upon promise between Marco, Grant, and Lincoln to tell only the truth when someone calls upon the zone of truth, further cementing the degree to which honesty is an important Li-Wilson family value. Whilst in the zone of truth, however, Grant beats around the bush with regards to his intentions, and the teens ultimately decide that they do not want him to come along with them to the church of the doodler, as he is untrustworthy, in addition to Lincoln saying that he needs some space for his own sake. Grant then pretends to respect this decision, though he is in fact once again lying through his teeth, and sneaks back on later.
Before exiting the bus for the first time, however, Lincoln tries to get his dad to open up a bit about his feelings. Grant's response?
Time after time after time, Grant refuses to confront himself and address anything from what occurred at the incursion, and in fact adds on to everything with a whole new slew of lies, and with each failed attempt at connection the rift between Lincoln and Grant increases. And Lincoln, true to his values and how he was raised, is not a hypocrite in wanting openness and accountability from his dad. Lincoln is not and has never acted like he is perfect and beyond making mistakes, but Lincoln takes responsibility for his actions, even when the degree to which he is actually complicit in the crime at hand is questionable. He writes a letter to the families of the firemen because he feels responsible for their deaths. He apologizes to Taylor for lying to him about the bracelets and helps not only Taylor but also Nicky escape the clutches of the FBI, even though the consequence of doing so could easily have been his own death. When he thinks he may have inadvertently lead Hero on, his immediate decision is to take accountability for it and clear things up. All of this in addition to consistently apologizing to his friends when he thinks he may have hurt them for one reason or another.
This is also an important thing to consider when we talk about the place of violence in the show. Yes all the characters, including Lincoln himself, have had to kill at some point or another for the sake of survival and protecting the ones they love. But Lincoln does not use the blood on his hands to justify violence in future decisions. Despite the fact that he has had to kill before, Lincoln, as mentioned in the beginning of this essay, continues to try incredibly hard to act as pacifist whenever he can, choosing to protect those around him with as little collateral damage as possible. Does he have a perfect track record? No! Does he still try his damned hardest to choose kindness and mercy? Absolutely! And this is an important distinction especially between Lincoln and Grant.
And then Grant kills Terry. Now Lincoln must shift his priorities towards protecting his friends from his dad, but in running after Scary still finds himself forced to confront him. So what does Grant have to say regarding his actions?
Both Lincoln and Scary are right to be furious with this response, Terry Jr. is dead and all Grant can offer in response is what is essentially another excuse. Grant's mental state does not absolve him of responsibility or accountability for his actions, which as Lincoln points out (and repeats later) consist not only of the singular choice of shooting Terry, but of every choice he has made before and after that. "I'm sorry your dad is broken" obviously doesn't bring Terry Jr. back, but perhaps more importantly demonstrates that Grant is still not willing to reflect on his actions any further than that and work on himself moving forward.
So Lincoln does what is perhaps the most difficult thing he has done in his life, and disowns his father. This is not a rash, impulsive decision. As established, Lincoln has given Grant many chances throughout the season to address his behavior and at least fucking *talk* with Lincoln about his mental state, but he refused. He refused, not because he means harm, but because Grant truly believes himself to be fundamentally broken and irreparable, and doesn’t see the effect that his own suffering is having on his son. This, in addition to continuously failing to take Lincoln seriously and treat him as more than a little kid, both in failing to listen to Lincoln's voices of concern as well as in disregarding any of his proposals to go about things differently (whether that means avoiding violence, trusting rather than lying, or both).
So when Lincoln says:
"It's not about what you just did now, Dad. It's all your choices. You chose me. There wasn't some passion, or, or just a kid. You chose me as your kid, knowing you were broken. You can't take that back. And… I love you, and I hate that you made me love you, when… you are who you are and you knew it."
This isn't Lincoln saying that Grant should not have had a kid because he is mentally unwell or has trauma, it is Lincoln saying that Grant continues to make choices without acknowledging his agency in those choices and the effect they have on those around him, instead choosing to pin his mistakes on his perceived brokenness without any resolution to do something about that.
And before you say, "but Grant didn't have a choice in becoming Lincoln's parent since he saved him from the Titanic":
This simply isn't true, as strictly speaking there was nothing stopping Grant and Marco from putting Lincoln up for adoption if one or both of them did not feel themselves to be ready or capable of taking care of a child and
Ignoring Lincoln's exact phrasing, "choosing to be a parent" is not just about the literal choice to have a child, it's about every choice you make before and after that. It's choosing not to express your concerns over parenthood with your spouse, which based on Grant's track record:
-Is definitely in-character for him. Conversely, in Marco's case, it may be choosing not to ask your partner about their feelings on the matter (because, really, asking Grant on the spot while literally on a sinking ship if he's okay with adopting the baby they just found is kinda rough). It's choosing not to go to therapy (not that we know whether Grant specifically did/does or not but all the same). It's choosing not to apologize when your child is upset with you because of something you did. It's choosing not to take them or their friends seriously. It's choosing to lie instead of trust. It's an endless amount of choices that Grant (and Marco) made every step of the way!
As a final note for this section, what's particularly unfortunate is that even with Lincoln's disownment, Grant still has failed to show any major signs of change. Note this telling exchange (from episode 40):
Grant: I-I understand that. I just thought. Just something that just occurred to me. Hey Dood.
Dood: Yeah?
Grant: Why did you kill those two guys?
Dood: Because I love you so much and I wanted to protect you.
Grant: Okay. That's all I wanted to know.
In which Grant is still making excuses rather than owning up to or apologizing for anything or striving to change his behavior in the future. What's great about Grant's "point" here too is that the two guards that d00d killed were absolutely unnecessary deaths, so this example does anything but work in Grant's favor.
Part 2/4: "My mother hates her body, we share the same outline"
But this is only part of the problem. As aforementioned, we learn early on and see repeated on multiple occasions that Grant thinks ill of himself to the point of believing that he deserves death, and does not want Lincoln to be anything like him.
This affects Lincoln in two major ways. Perhaps most obviously, it leaves Lincoln greatly concerned for his dad's wellbeing, which in turn acts as his main motivation for trying (and failing) to get Grant to explore and explain those feelings. Additionally, however, Grant's self-loathing also has a passive but deeply damaging effect on Lincoln's self-worth. The most important indication of this is when Lincoln says:
"Okay. Look, Scary, I just... You know what? I don't even care. I just needed a friend and I don't know… I don’t know what you're going through, but… no, my dad always said you can't love somebody unless you love yourself, right? Well, last time I asked him if he loved himself, he… He doesn't. So… I don't know, so maybe he doesn't love me either. And you seem to know what that's like, and, you're my friend! You're dealing with these things and I'm just here. I just, I don't know! I don't love myself either! I don't know! But I know that more people will die if we can't do this together, and you're the only person, like, in this group— I mean you guys are, I mean— [sighs] Look, you can go. I'm not going to stop you. You go if you want to go. I'm done."
Also classic Lincoln move to say he doesn't care then proceed to hug Scary through an Eldritch Blast. In this essay, on why people misuse the word "apathy" in applying it to Lincoln,
Though the issue comes up again in a less obvious but very interesting way when Lincoln says that:
Which I assume probably seems pretty out of left field. To explain a bit what I'm trying to get at here, consider the following scenario:
Your parent, who you care about immensely, possesses certain qualities (say, idk, intrusive thoughts or mood swings or delusional thoughts or *something*) that they possess great shame over, and truly, wholeheartedly believe makes them "evil" or unlovable or even outright deserving of death. Of course, you do not believe that your parent is any of these things, it hurts to see that they feel this way about them-self, so you try your best to support them, even if you know deep down that you are their child and this should not be your responsibility. Your parent does not see the effect that their mental state is having on yours, does not take your voices of concern seriously, and mostly leaves you feeling like you are talking to a wall.
This hurts already, but it gets worse. You are your parent's child, and you are human, and so you inevitably find yourself with some of the characteristics that your parent loathes so much in them-self. Maybe you have similar thought patterns. Maybe you've made similar mistakes. Your parent doesn't love them-self because of these qualities that you now see in yourself, so how can you be sure that they do not hate you for them too? Do they believe that you deserve to die for these things as well? Your parent obviously assures you to the contrary, after all, they love you more than anything. But your parent fails to offer any meaningful line of distinction between their flaws and yours (after all, there isn't one, not really), and continues to assert that, unlike you, they really do deserve to die. Your parent is a hypocrite, and their reassurance does little to convince you.
Hopefully that makes some sense. With regards to the "dreams about killing my dads" part, mostly what I'm trying to say is that these dreams, while certainly very different from Grant's conscious thoughts about violence, still tread the line of mimicking them to some degree, and Grant's "I deserve to die because of how my brain works, don't be anything like me because that's bad!" really doesn't leave Lincoln with a healthy way to process and interpret this fact about himself, even if these dreams don't actually say anything about who he is as a person.
Anyways all that to say, on multiple levels Grant's unwillingness to even try to love himself and treat himself better has been having effects on his son that he can't even begin to realize, in addition to everything discussed in the first bit.
"But baba," I hear you say, "what about Marco? Why has Lincoln seemingly disowned both of his dads?"
Part 3/4: Three is the loneliest number
Well, I think there's a couple things going on here. For one thing, I think in a sense Lincoln sees his dads as kind of a "package deal", which is to say that from his pov disowning Grant means Marco would have to pick a side, and though it pains him immensely (as we see evidence of on several occasions), Lincoln would ultimately rather give up Marco than have Grant be left alone without either of them, because he will always love and care about Grant, and because he's selfless that way.
Additionally, for a good long while, Lincoln doesn't actually appear to harbor any resentment towards Marco:
However, this later part of the season has brought with it a new wave of disillusionment, and in its wake Lincoln has finally come to question the last major issue characterizing his relationship with his parents: social isolation.
We have known from basically the first episode of the season that Lincoln has lived a very isolated, lonely life, and that the only reason he's even going to public high school now is because he finally convinced Grant to let him:
As a side note, I have seen discussion of the fact that since Lincoln was rescued from the Titanic, it's possible that he was homeschooled solely because he did not legally exist. The above statement from Matt seems to work against this theory, in addition to the fact that if Lincoln was missing legal papers to get into elementary school... That would also prevent him from going to high school. Also, I mean. If you actually were to find an abandoned baby there's a whole legal process you're supposed to go through, and since Lincoln surely wouldn't have any close blood relatives around, that would still leave the possibility for Grant and Marco to adopt him legally if they wanted to (and if they chose not to go through said process, that's kind of on them?). Which isn't to say that this theory is out of the question, but in any case being homeschooled is one thing, whereas the actual degree of social isolation Lincoln goes through growing up is way more than just that, as we will delve into.
Now, we know that Grant eventually puts an end to Lincoln and Normal seeing each other on the basis that Lark and Sparrow are dangerous, which... Itself is actually fair tbh, in particular given what we now know about Hero. Not fair to Lincoln or Normal, obviously, but understandable. Much less acceptable, is the fact that Lincoln actually grows up without any friends his age whatsoever:
We understand of course that the motives behind this extreme social isolation are not malicious or otherwise done with ill-intent, but that doesn't make this even remotely okay! Of course then Lincoln is very clingy and perhaps even territorial over his dads, to the point where one of his biggest fears is his parents having another child who would take some of their attention away from him- they've created an environment in which they are basically all he has!
As a direct result of this, Lincoln gets lonely very easily, and when he finally does make some friends of his own, he will do anything and everything for them, even if it means risking his own life (at least then he isn't alive and lonely!)
This is also why Lincoln is so especially distraught after the loss of Mr. Kicks, a digital avatar whom he considered his best (and only) friend.
Additionally, Lincoln's fear of returning to his lonesome childhood creates an unfortunate scenario in which he cannot be honest with his dads about the fact that he is being bullied at school
Even though that is definitely the case (and in fact we see it first-hand on many occasions), because to do so would run the risk of his dads taking him out of public school, and that, to him, is worse.
Lincoln beginning to view this aspect of his childhood (the isolation but also the over-protectiveness and overbearing attitude more generally) for what it is is why Matt's intros have recently shifted from "schooled at home" to "schooled in prison", in addition to pretty directly saying that high school was like heaven compared to his home life (in episode 40), and I don't think Lincoln is even remotely in the wrong for looking back at his isolation and thinking "hey, even if you had good intentions, that was kind of fucked up actually, and I need to distance myself from you for my own sake."
Not that Lincoln wanting freedom from his overbearing dads is a new thing! I mean apart from what one can logically infer from Lincoln convincing Grant to let him go to public school, Matt does drop a bunch of telling details here and there such as Lincoln's favorite sound being "the silence of being home alone and free". It's just that now is when these feelings are finally starting to come to the surface.
It is also something that Lincoln naturally would hold against both Grant and Marco, because they are both aware of and responsible for this aspect of his upbringing (whether Marco acted actively or as an enabler in the matter notwithstanding- though I would look no further than both Grant and Marco getting red cards the one time they tried letting Lincoln play soccer with other kids to observe how that family dynamic plays out), hence feeling the need to cut himself off from the both of them in order to set a long-overdue boundary. That said, to be honest with you, I really don't think he's actually all that upset with Marco, and would mostly just like to see him again.
If the events of the Titanic help to ease any aspect of Lincoln's frustration, it would be this one. Not in the sense that it magically makes what Lincoln went through growing up okay, but it does still recontextualize Grant and Marco's degree of overbearingness and (part of) why they are how they are, and I absolutely think that Lincoln would have sympathy for that.
So, where does that leave us?
Part 4/4: What remains (+ the case study of Scary)
"But baba," you say, "Grant and Marco are not just their mistakes! They've both done so many things right as parents, and they love Lincoln more than anything!"
I turn to you, tears in my eyes. "I know," I say, "I know, but that does not contradict or erase the fact that they have inadvertently hurt Lincoln in many, many ways, and he has a right to be upset with them, and express that, and set boundaries if he feels the need to."
You sigh. "So do you think Grant is a good dad or a bad one?" you ask.
I shake my head. "He's just... He's just a dad. A dad who's had a rough swing of things from the beginning. He never meant to hurt Lincoln, and I truly believe he's got a good heart, but I want to see him try harder. I need to see him try harder than he currently is to better himself, for Lincoln's sake as much as his own."
Is... More or less how I feel. I absolutely agree that as a parent Grant obviously gives a shit, and my intention here is absolutely not to say "hey actually, Grant is awful!"
As I mentioned at the very beginning of this essay, however, collectively I have found over the course of the season that Lincoln's trauma and struggles have gone severely understated and undermined, sometimes to the point of even turning him into the bad guy or depicting him as acting dramatic for a decision that I think was very brave of him, actually. So... It does feel necessary to me to point out that, as much as I care about Grant and recognize that he's suffered immensely too, he's still made a lot of mistakes over the course of the season, and still has a lot of room to grow as a person.
As things currently are, I would not blame Lincoln if he did not forgive Grant by the end of the season. Do I think that's what's gonna happen? No lol.
If you'll excuse a mini side-tangent, because for now I don't really want to make this a separate post, the mid-season evolution of Lincoln and Scary's relationship is actually a great case study for Lincoln's capacity for forgiveness, in addition to his inability to give up on people:
Tony Pepperoni's murder is, I would argue, an attack against Lincoln most personally (relative to the other teens). Aside from Lincoln having the strongest pacifistic tendencies of the group, it's in his home, it's in front of Marco, as established in the 3rd section Tony Pepperoni, by virtue of having been over for dinners at the Li-Wilson household before, is someone Lincoln knows more personally than the other teens and one of the only people in his life he could have possibly approximated to a friend. Most importantly though, Scary goes behind Lincoln's back in letting Willy out and disclosing the location of the party, and that is a significant breach of trust.
So Lincoln kicks Scary out of the house (and more or less out of the group by extension) because protecting the others from her is the most important thing at that point in time (sound familiar?). For the next bit, Lincoln's behavior towards Scary becomes a juggling act of keeping a close eye on her to make sure she doesn't cause more harm (and yes, it's also when they are meanest with each other), but also keeping a close eye on her to look after her (a notable example of this being that he doesn't leave her behind in the hall of mirrors, even when it would have been easier and perhaps even "beneficial" to do so in the context of the anchor quest).
And yet despite all the mutual hostility, Lincoln without question also fights the hardest to get Scary back. He breaks the pick as a sign of trust (and as Freddie put it: "that's love babeeey") and to show her she's welcome back in the group, follows through on this decision despite the fact that it creates a temporary rift between him and the others (Normal and Taylor) who oppose her return (perhaps a good time to also say as a reminder that Lincoln was the most against letting Willy out in the first place), breaks a door down to protect her from Willy even when everyone else in the house treats him as crazy for doing so, refuses to fight Scary when she goes on the offense, and hugs her through a god damn eldritch blast because he can't let her leave and hurt more people but still cares about her to the point that he would literally choose to die before hurting her or giving up on fighting for her. Like, if that's not love and forgiveness, I don't fucking know what is. This in addition to him encouraging the others to go easy on her and otherwise looking out for her past that point.
So do I think Lincoln Li-Wilson has it in him to forgive Grant in spite of it all? That is a resounding yes from me. Will the events of the Titanic facilitate this if only by painting Grant's situation in a more sympathetic light and showcasing some of his virtues? Totally, I mean, there's a reason Anthony decided to make the arc go this way. But will I be a bit disappointed if this forgiveness comes without any major growth on Grant's part? Also. Also yes yeah.
MM. I DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW TO END THIS ONE TBH. Heh. Well, thank you for one thing, for taking the time to read a post this long. If you're reading this not too long after I posted it I am most definitely pacing around rn going "oh god they hate it!" but uh. Well that's a me problem lol. Anyways, I hope this proves to be at least somewhat insightful? ...Yeah no apart from that I really am struggling to end this properly and honestly I'm real sleepy lol so I'll just say again (whether you agree with the points listed here or not) THANKS FOR HEARING ME OUT Y'ALL AND TAKE CARE.
#dndads#lincoln li wilson#grant wilson#Nervous about this one! Well I always am with these but people can be a bit touchy when it comes to Grant especially so there's that.#dungeons and daddies#but what can you do ig!#marco li#long post#baba babbles#<- tag I still don't use usually smh#second section especially I think is where I'm really like- man I *hope* I'm expressing myself alright and people get what I'm laying down#scary marlowe#suuuuure yeah enough Scary here that I can tag her in I think
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mann im going to get my blood reports tomorrow and im lwk scared
#mostly it's fine but i looked up this medicine the doc prescribrd me and she said it's for weight loss#but i looked it up and everywhere it said it's for type 2 diabetes#to control blood sugar levels when it's so wildly out of control that nothing is fixing it#why would she give me that??? i mean im obviously gonna ask but tab tak ki anxiety bhai#i have barely processed the fact that pcod is a chronic illness which means im going to have it forever im mostly avoiding thinking about#it cause it feels too big and unbearable#diabetes would be fucking wild man im 21 years old#i am doing so terrible in not turning out to be like my dad lol i want to cry#i just hate hate hate this so much#like i was trying really fucking hard but depression wasn't getting fixed and i kept eating sleeping being in bed all day#like how can one illness cause another be frr man give me a break 😭#and i cannot even officially say depression i just sorta googled thr symptoms and relate to them most days but not everyday#so like#what is all this for#ugh goodnight i hope i wake up and it's all alright#i don't want to be a calorie counting sweet avoiding freak i love chocolate
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OOC. Man, if I had the courage and energy to draw them, y'all wouldn't see the end of my ideas—-
#;; ᴀᴍᴏɴɢ ᴜs ( ooc. )#something something being a perfectionist and hating disappointing myself and others does wonders (atrocities) to my ability to do things—#I dont know how yall can do it scared and bad man....#anywho!#I hope everyone's doing alright today!
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Daniel from Little Hope looks so huggable.
#little hope daniel#little hope#Andrew: Hey can you carry me for a bit? my legs are getting tired…#Daniel: Sure man! *Picks Andrew up and puts him between his arm like a book*#Andrew: ._.#Also Andrew: You know what? I think I’m alright with this
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Hmmm it's been a while since I posted one of my weird crossover ideas on tumblr. Let's fix that.
For the past few days I've been enjoying daydreaming about a Avatar the Last Airbender/Wingfeather Saga crossover. But it's. probably not what you would expect, haha. I'll probably never write it as more than ideas though, so I may was well post the concept here.
So this takes place in the Wingfeather world of Aerwiar, several years before the Fall of Anniera that jumpstarts the war/plot happening in the book series. One day, Artham Wingfeather is in one of Anniera's port towns and is called over by a concerned citizen, who leads him to a crowd watching a rowboat slowly drift to shore. The rowboat contains two small children, who Artham brings ashore and takes back to Castle Rysen.
The small children in question are Zuko (age 4) and Azula (age 2). In this version of events, the Fire Nation royal family is a bit darker than in canon and, after Ozai flies into a rage and burns Zuko (yes he still has his scar I know I'm mean, but there's a POINT I swear) Ursa decides she needs to get her kids the heck out of the Fire Nation. But Ozai is suspicious and possessive of her in general and has her under guard so she can't escape the palace, so she entrusts her kiddos to a few trusted servants, who pack them up in a rowboat with food and water and send them off, hoping they'll make it to a coastal village and be taken in by a kindly family.
Most of this is explained/implied in a note that Ursa sent along with the kids, that Artham reads and passes on to Esben (and Nia and Arundelle). They are properly horrified.
However, what no one realizes is that these kiddos have come through a portal between the two worlds. So Artham and Esben ASSUME that SOMEWHERE these kid's mom is being held captive by their cruel father and so they send out search parties/reconnaissance teams to try and rescue her, and because any father so cruel as to hurt his son the way Ozai hurt Zuko needs to be stopped. The brothers also wonder if, perhaps, this is somehow connected to the Tragic Accident that befell their parents and aunt Illiya a year before when their ship was lost and they were killed. And they start to wonder if, perhaps, that wasn't an accident, but that they stumbled upon whatever This was and tried to stop it and got in the way. (They don't suspect Bonifer... at first...)
Anyway, Artham finds himself caretaker for these two small children and develops a bond with them, especially Zuko (what, you thought I WASN'T going to use this as an excuse to make a connection between two of my favorite characters of all time?). Arundelle also becomes close with them, and- besides the cooks in the castle- she's the first person Artham tells about the kids. Because I thought it'd be fun to make Arundelle a healer (hey, why shouldn't she be good with healing plants and herbs? heh) and have her be the main person who treats Zuko's burn.
Azula recovers from the trauma of being separated from her mom and home pretty quickly since the new place she's in has kind, caring people, nice food, is still a palace, and she's two. She loves playing with Arundelle and listening to Artham's stories. She's very bright and friendly and talkative. She IS very attached to her brother tho, sleeping in the same bed as him the first few nights in this new place, even defending him/trying to explain his actions the way she's heard adults do. (when Artham finds the siblings they're clinging to each other in their little boat, terrified)
Zuko is more complicated. He's had the physical trauma of being burned paired with the emotional trauma of being hurt and abused by his father (the burning wasn't the first time, just the most severe). He understands a little more of what's going on than his sister. He love, love, loves being held, especially by Artham, because since Azula was born he's not been allowed to act like a "baby" and hasn't gotten much physical affection. He's very shy and has periods of mutism when meeting new people or encountering distressing/unfamiliar situations. Little guy has also had his senses severely rattled by losing both half his vision and half his hearing in one fell swoop. In short, he's a mess. The first time he's alone with Artham he has a panic attack because he thinks Artham will hurt him, but Artham being so kind and understanding and gentle with him helps him unlearn that. Zuko becomes very attached to Artham very quickly and... Artham becomes attached to him pretty fast too.
(Additionally, Zuko is terrified of Bonifer. The only explanation he can give for that is, "He looks at me like father did." which does plant a little seed of suspicion in Artham's mind specifically)
So, long term, this severely messes up Gnag/Bonifer's plans, since suddenly the Annierans are combing the Hollows/The Killridge Mts/even the Doonlands trying to find Zuko and Azula's family. This either forces the baddies to speed up their plans... or derails them altogether. I haven't decided yet, haha. The Annierans do find out something of what Gnag is doing (they don't connect Bonifer to it right away tho) and end up with some preparation for the attack that eventually comes. I think the attack on Anniera is still somewhat successful, but a lot less so than in canon. Like, I don't think the entire populace is captured/scattered and I haven't decided if I want Artham and Esben to still get captured or not. (if they do I have this great mental image of 7-year-old Zuko and 5-year-old Azula trying to rescue them from Throg. Just. just imagine the CHAOS even a pair of BABY firebenders could do in Aerwiar. Imagine.)
Oh yeah, to give you a better idea of WHEN this happens, Nia is pregnant with Janner when Artham finds Zuko and Azula. I just thought it'd be fun for Zuko to have the same age gap with Janner he has with Aang and it makes it close enough for things to come together plot wise.
So yeah, that's my thoughts on how Zuko and Azula could potentially have prevented the Fall of Anniera. xD
Other random things they cause:
Artham adopting them
Artham and Arundelle getting married a few years before Anniera falls after the closeness and bonding that comes from caring for a pair of traumatized children.
Absolute chaos with their firebending (the Annierans chalk this up to the old stories of Annieran/Anyaran kids having special powers to defend their home with and decide not to question it further)
So yeah, there's my late night thoughts on a WFS/ATLA AU. where Artham adopts Zuko and Azula. because why not. I hope it was a fun read. :D
#the wingfeather saga#avatar the last airbender#artham wingfeather#zuko#azula#arundelle wingfeather#wingfeather saga spoilers#wfs spoilers#additionally: zuko and azula being good older cousins and trying to protect the BABIES (janner and tink) from the fangs#zuko still gets to learn swordfighting artham teaches him#throne warden training pairs really well with firebending training luckily#zuko trying to wrangle his younger cousins and sister when they're a little older#he helps janner feel less like he's tied down by looking after tink and leeli because zuko is. also looking after them#azula is NOT helping she is causing CHAOS with the younger ones#can you IMAGINE what azula and kalmar would get up to#my word#is leeli still crippled in this AU Idk man I didn't get that far but imagine if she was#and zuko decided he was gonna take EXTRA time training his littlest cousin to defend/take care of herself#because he remembers how much everyone helped him with learning to deal with his loss of vision/hearing#artham tells his new kids SO MANY stories#he loves them so much#carries them around when they're smol#SINGS TO THEM#he's so soft he'd be such a good dad I can't he already loves kids so much ;-;#alright I need to go to bed I hope you enjoyed my ramblings xD
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*Ehem*
HEARYE HEARYE‼️‼️‼️ 🔔🗣️🔔🗣️🔔🗣️🔔🗣️
CALLING UPON DEAREST MUTUAL OUR BRILLIANCE OUR EXTRAVAGANT @marclef
THOU ARTIST HAT HAS BROUGHT THOU ART TRADE FOR YOU.
SHE ONLY WISHES YOU THE BEST AND HOPES YOU LIKE THOU DEAR TRADE.
NOW WE PROUDLY PRESENT:
*INTENSE COUGHING WHEEZING*
Fuck my throat- WE HOPE DEAR @marclef LIKES THOU TRADE. WE HOPE TO SEE YOU SOON AND HAVE THE MOST WONDERFUL OF DAYS.
-SINCERELY
whereismyhat5678 👁️💖👁️
#*COUGH COUGH WHEEZE* Gosh my fucking throat- *WHEEZE*#God I can’t do this job anymore my throat is killing me!#My doctor appointment is in- JANUARY?? I can’t wait that long I can barely speak!!#Stupid royal Hat making me do this- *scoff* My throat can’t function my fucking god-#*SHOVES GUY OUT OF THE WAY* EYHM EVERYONE SHE IS HERE#Eyhm is SO frickin’ cute I loved drawing this little goober 🤲💗💞💕💓💖#Also hope the shading looks alright because I think it looks a bit odd but it’s alright 🤷♀️ Just hope you like it tho 🫶🫶#Also SORRY for that weird ass calling my news man says his throats been bugging him#But then again he’s just here. I have to pay him by the end of this month 😒 Hope he doesn’t argue about how poorly I paid him again#Sheesh- 🙄#Hope you have a wonderful day Marclef!!#Eyhm#Art trade 🎉🎉🎊🎊#NOT MY CHARACTER ❌❌
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"Oh it would have been more satisfying if the humans had invented a technology which defeated the Martians rather than have them killed off by accident just when humanity's impotence in the face of disaster seems to be confirmed". I
To me that's just a fancy way of saying "Yeah but humans could totally handle the Martians and the writer has a duty to reassure the audience of that!"
Sir we cannot even handle climate change and I'm sorry to tell you that it's not entirely due to a lack of technological expertise
#In all fairness maybe we can handle climate change we don't know yet but it's going to take a lot more than a fancy new invention#As for war and genocide and all the other human ills that we can't seem to solve how do you think the atomic bomb worked out#And when I say technology or science I don't just mean in the normal STEM sense#As a history student you end up asking a lot whether your subject is actually beneficial to society or capable of solving anything#Or the political sciences- was the League f Nations or even today's UN a success?#Maybe if we just keep learning and studying we can solve it! Well maybe. But what will humanity look like when we're done?#Anyway I'm getting a bit far from the point of the War of the Worlds but maybe I'm just not enough of a science fiction nut for this convo#Maybe the image of societal collapse impressed itself on me more strongly than any delight over long-winded explanations of alien machines#Maybe it would be different if I'd read the book hoping for a good story about aliens#rather than to read one man's uncomfortable rather pessimistic views on what an alien invasion might tell us about human ity#I am simply asking certain fans to sometimes Dig a Little Deeper#Alright rant really over this time#...maybe#It's just that there are so many potential issues with that book but honestly I can't accept that the ending is one of them#Even the hint at the end that since the Martians proved it possible maybe some day humans might colonise other planets I just !!!!!
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can i please request a fun fact about anything ever
#i would like that that would be nice#this is an open request not necessary a specific target (i mean there is one person who will definitely see this (hello#sorry about all of this i think i’m slightly silly hoursing and also just exploding like i dunno#i am alright i’m just also uaaaaaaaaaaaa#i hope you’re alright too i yeah i hope you are ok (this is me being paranoid#not because of you it’s a hormones thing i think cause this is just the feeling)#(man this was supposed to be a non specific post fuck ok oh well)#what was i saying anyway uhhhhh jonah is not the whale right??? i don’t think so im a fake jonah and the whale fan i’m sorry#i swear if it’s not even actually jonah like i’m not just getting confused with job and weezer my name is jonas am i#(like i say. i have no idea what i am thinking right now really i do slightly sorry that’s an exaggeration)#ok ending this ramble sorry everyone else that is not my girlfriend i don’t think she knows what i’m on about either here probably#i certainly don’t so if you can decipher this that’s very impressive#anyway anyway. fun facts !!!!#ezra’s real life rambles
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i don't hate anyone as a matter of principle but if you're coughing on public transit without a mask on you are testing that principle in the strongest possible sense.
#i get that people can't just stay home. i get that quality masks are expensive. i get that we have to be reasonable.#so i am setting the bar SO fucking low alright? i don't care if the mask is cloth. i don't care if it's a fucking bandana.#i just had covid and i'm sextuple vaxxed or whatever now and i'm wearing a kn95. i'll be fine!#but this is frankly a matter of manners just as much as infection control.#stigma is a weapon to be wielded with the utmost care and restraint but jfc we have GOT to stigmatize being publicly sick & unmasked!#'it's allergies' 1. how do YOU know that. 2. how do you expect anyone ELSE to know that.#even if it IS allergies you're still worrying and inconveniencing the people around you by not being masked! AND THAT'S STILL RUDE!#anyways if you're ever indoors unmasked & hacking away and you're wondering if people are judging you? we are.#man i have autism. i don't judge people for ANYTHING in public. piss in the intersection. whatever. but this is my line girlies.#rhi talks#you can reblog this. honestly out of every post ive made this is probably the only one i actually hope people reblog lmfao#like i said. not to be disabled on main but this PARTICULAR very specific action? this one we have a moral responsibility to stigmatize.
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(。・ω・。)ノ♡
#Alright I got tragically interrupted while watching it but I'm finally finished watching the episode!!#It's really really good both the animation and drawings are very detailed compared to the rest of the anime but...#The pace is so off :((( Like it's not the end of the world but ugh. It's unfortunate...#So many things just don't hit off as deeply because everything is moving so fast all the time and there's no time to process anything.#They won't allow you one second for the last line of a scene to sink in that the next scene's ost is already playing.#And like it's not even the worst crime an anime can commit I guess but still...#I wish they didn't. Like rather than make a 13 episodes season and squeeze the Sky Casino arc in merely two episodes it would have been–#a lot better to finish the season at the previous episode and make 12 episodes out of everything (so that everything could be better paced)#Like yeah maybe it's not the best season ending that there can be but... It's not terrible either‚ you have Atsushi saying the line–#“there's still hope” and the season ending there‚ that's pretty cool#I don't know why everyone feels like they have to rush all the time.#Guys do I have to be the one to remind you you make more money if more season come out.#Like how can the knowledge of Sigma being made by the book have any kind of impact when we've only known him for ten minutes.#Teruko's looking mad AND looking cutesy AND blowing up the landing zone didn't have the same comedic effect they did in the manga because..#It just happened all together! There's no time to process anything. Or maybe I'm just slow idk but I mean YOU GOTTA–#MAKE TIME FOR THE OPENING AND ENDING IN THE EPISODE c'mon man#Sorry I'm complaining it's actually good. I really really love Teruko & Tachihara. Jouno too!!!#I liked the Tahihara spotlight this episode... It's so cute to see what he's like when he's not acting– well‚ not completely I guess#Mmmmhhh.#Yesterday I read an interesting post on how a lot of early dc/mk wouldn't work today because the technology of the world has changed SO muc#I think a similar reflection can be made for the doa terrorist plot. Countries are pushing towards a complete digital money transition.#In 50 years or so coins may not be circulating anymore and today already the impact of this terrorist plot would be a lot smaller–#compared to when the chapters were coming out. I think#Well. Nice episode! Forward to next week! If tomorrow's manga chapter hasn't killed me before that#random rambles
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i saw her friend today and in a way i think it really ehlped cuz she was the one who was being so kind and like 'how are you doing i know this must be hard but i still want to be friends' and it really touched me cuz iw as stressed cuz i was paranoid they were talking shit about me or smth. she also told me she was also shocked when she found out that she broke up w me so i guess it feels good knowing im not the only person kept in the dark i guess but its like if its something she couldnt even tell her friends about then what made her do it. cuz when i asekd her friend 'did she ever seem concnerd about the relationship or anything' her friend was like 'no.... not.... not really?' which idk if i fully believe but i dont think she was totally lying cuz she did seem to at least consider it. so if she wawsnt lying then i still dont understand what compelled her to dump me
#and i mean this is a friend shes CLOSE with. like super close with#and yeah there is the possibility shes lying just to keep her privacy which i understand but still like the fact even she was shocked when#she found out she dumped me ?? like that has to mean something#however when i asked 'how is she doing' her friend was like 'shes alright' and idk why but that kinda hurt#and idk if she was just saying it cuz maybe she thought it would make me feel better or if she didnt want to give too many details#or if she really truly was doing 'all right' but like what the fuck do you mean shes doing alright#like am i seriously sobbing on 1am walks around campus because i miss her and shes just doing alright????#like what the fuck#i really hope its mor ethan that because thats actually goign to break me#hres teh thing though like i dont doubt that she felt some sort of emotion cuz she was crying when we broke up and our entire relationship#she was so genuine about all of it but its also that annoying part of me thats like did she ever care#because how was she the one to tell me she wanted a relatoinship with me and how was she the one to tell me 'i love you first'#only to dump me not even 5 months later??? i just dont fucking understand any of it#im so fuckign confused about it all#all i can even hope for is that somehow she realizes she messed up and comes back to me and ill take her back immediately man#but she dosnt seem the kind to do that#i just wish i understood why she didnt want to give us even a CHANCE to fix whatever issues she thought we were havign#CUZ SHE NEVER EVEN SAID ANYTHING ABOUT ANY ISSUES!!!! SO I DONT UNDERSTAND#LIKE SHE BROKE UP W ME OUT OF THE BLUE!!!! NEVER SAID ANYTHING TO ANYONE???#unless her friend is lying when i asked about whether she seemed concerned#but still
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school for the kiddos starts up again tomorrow and i'm gonna be so honest i love summer camps so much but also i'm really excited to get back to my school year job <3 walk the kiddos to school... sit and help them with their homework...
#new little kindergartners to walk to their little kindergarten lines! perhaps. i don't know. hopefully man 😭#plus it means i get to for sure hang out with my favorite little guy most days haha#missed that little dude. and you can tell he's missed me too cause whenever he's seen me last couple weeks#he has taken to just nuzzling me like a cat which is both so silly and so endearing. yeah man missed you too... you are so sweaty...#get to hang out with my morning kids more too!! missed those guys as well!!!!! the cuties... the sweethearts...#many kids leaving the program last year. but being so honest. a teeny relief not to have to deal with those specific children.#love them obviously and it's no trouble to deal with them it's literally my job. but it was definitely more work haha#ummmm one exception actually there's a pair of siblings i'm gonna miss so bad i hope they're doing alright elsewhere...#valentine notes
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i find new dialogue i haven't heard before in bg3 and start hooting and hollering excitedly while quicksaving to see every option
#multi makes text posts#anyway. hate that astarion can be endearing to me at times#bg3#specifics in next tag#fucking 'i don't travel with you for your personality... so i hope you'll get your magic back'#'you're looking drained... and i know i didn't do that. are you alright?'#fuck you man
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